#the compulsive caretaking of other people

[storkmuffin]

We all agree that Emilia the Romanian has to be the eldest daughter of her family right? Everything about her is 120% Eldest Daughter Coded. Shaking hands with her from afar in solidarity and admiration.

[runawaycarouselhorse]

(Miracle Train Episode 11) [CW character death, traffic accidents, SPOILERS because I'm spoiling the whole twist of this episode, okay. Japanese audio, English subtitles, background music.]

A friend brought up the subject of low-effort, generic anime series having one stand-out, well-written episode that feels like it's from another show entirely and reminded me of Miracle Train Episode 11.

Miracle Train is light-hearted, silly show where humanized train stations (who are all prettyboys, yep, that kind of show) help A Girl (Usually) With A Problem.

In this episode, a carefree, but wholly selfless and kind, very spacey girl boards the train. She wants to meet the man she loves, it's a special day for them! She's all bubbly and sweet and so happy, two of the stations correctly guess she's going to get married.

They guard her to her stop, she always sets out two hours in advance, because she's often loses track of time and gets caught up in everybody else's problems. They try their best to guide her, look, you don't have to do everything yourself, there's other resources, other people help too, see?

Despite moving to Roppongi for work three years ago, her knowledge of buildings and places is dated... she claims this is her first date with Hideaki since moving to Roppongi... her flip-phone is battered and old, her love's face is rubbed off the sticker on the back.

... she's a ghost. She died rushing into the street, to catch a little girl's balloon. She didn't see danger coming, she was so focused on helping...

[almightyhamslice]

Syringeon redesign!! FINALLY the last of the main characters (until Banban 8 comes out n I have to redesign the new silly guy and possibly Brushista)!!! He is a disgusting and disturbing worm but he wishes people didnt think he was disgusting and scary because he thinks he'd be a good parent!! (he's... not really...) He was conceptualized as a nurse mascot named "Fuchsia" but was "remodeled" when the scientists considered that he had no appeal to children, so they stopped caring to make him presentable to the public & modified him based on what traits would be useful to them.

"Fuchsia" was created with the DNA of a human woman and a hammerhead worm, though his four arms are from neither component, simply sculpted onto him when he was an inert clay figure. He is transgender and despises being viewed as a woman and has pretty severe body dysphoria that was only worsened by the scientists' modifications-- he always knew "Fuchsia" wasn't who he wanted to be, but the scientists and marketing department didn't know or really care about that. Several walls do display Syringeon's new name and appearance, but upper floors' gift shops still sell merchandise of "nusre Fuchsia" listed next to Slow Seline and Queen Bouncelia.

Comparison between Syringeon's original form and his new form. The scientists sought to make him a mechanized surgeon who could be expendable & care for the other mascots without fear of death, so he was made physically larger to effectively restrain the others. His original hands were all amputated to be replaced with various metal tools. He despairs over the loss because now he cannot use his hands to feel things. His mask is actually the same as it was pre-operation, he's not obligated to wear it anymore but he prefers to keep it on out of comfort.

Syringeon has a very strange complex about parenthood. He wants to be a parent and understands how to create subcases, but prefers to create them self destructively. He grafts them from his own flesh, injecting clay and givanium into his body and waiting a while for the new creatures to burst out of his stomach, like larval xenomorphs almost. It hurts a lot and he does it compulsively, he has no regard for his physical safety or wellness due to how his so-called caretakers treated him as expendable. The scar going down his stomach is permanent, the wound has been reopened and torn so many times the only thing keeping it together is his stitches.

He is cruel to his offspring in a similar way to how the scientists were cruel to him. He discards them once they aren't "cute" and creates new ones in their place. He has only one child he consistently cares for and loves unconditionally: Senengeon.

That was a lot and it was much heavier than usual!!! I overthought the fuck out of Syringeon because I designed him during a bout of dysphoria n that shaped a lot of how he is!! I hope you like him and aren't completely offput?? I mean ofc it's horror art but, you know what I mean!

[homeofhousechickens]

SCP-■■■■■ Beeper

Object Class- Euclid

Special containment procedures-

Scp-■■■■■ is to be kept inside a normal indoor living area and fed a species appropriate diet daily along with daily water changes. Scp-■■■■■ is to be contained along with experienced caregivers who are self aware of the influence of Scp-■■■■■.

Description-

Scp-■■■■■ is what appears to be a normal specimen of the species gallus domesticus, specifically the bantam variety of the buff Brahma breed. Scp-■■■■■ is perceived to be notably cuter than other members of its breed and species.

Special authorization needed to continue reading. Only foundation personel who have completed the Memetics and Infohazards Orientation may proceed.

Scp-■■■■■ Beeper

Object Class- Keter

Description-

Scp-■■■■■ "Beeper" is a small chicken, a Cognitohazard, and a self perpetuating mematic virus with the potential to cause an EP-Class "Thought Tyrant" Scenario.

When a piece of visual media showing Scp-■■■■■ is viewed by a person, they begin to feel intense love and affection towards Scp-■■■■■. Victims of this affect will also feel a compulsion to share this media with others, specifically close friends and family who will then perpetuate cycle.

Viewers who do not have a resilience to cognitohazardious effects may also begin to incorporate strange rituals, language changes, and chants to their daily life while continuing to feel a strong compulsion to share media of Scp-■■■■■. People who are affected that have become informed and self-aware of Scp-■■■■■'s effects are able to think clearly but are still compelled to share media. The foundation believes this is a way for the Scp to always have adequate care that isn't completely befuddled by their anomalous properties.

Special containment procedures-

Scp-■■■■■ must be kept inside a normal indoor living area alongside its caretakers and other members of its species. Scp-■■■■■ must be given daily water changes and fed an adequate species appropriate diet. No steps should be taken to limit the spread of Scp-■■■■■ I mean why would you want to? She is so cute and fluffy. Don't you want to hold her and pet her? She is so cute and nice. I'm sure she would love a little treatie or kissy from you. Your mother loves cute animals. You are sure she would love this picture of Beeper where she looks so sweet. We don't know what she is. A little bird like her couldn't hurt anyone, really? I mean, just look at her, look at her, she is perfect, and she must be shared. I'm sure my friends also want to see her. Her little feathered feet are so adorable. Look at her. I love how she eats her chicken feed. Her beak is immaculate, and her feathers are so soft. She isn't a chicken.  I think I'm going to tell my grandparents about her. They love chickens, and they have their own coop. I'm sure they would love Beeper. I love Beeper.

[wisteria-lodge]

wait there are no house elves in malfoy manor? i mean it's possible that during the time voldemort and the others where there the house elves could just be in prison or they are there and jkr just didn't mention them

because let's say there aren't house elves and voldemort and the death eaters are there, who would have prepared the meals or whatever things guest needs when they visit or stay in someone's house

In Harry Potter, we see a few other strategies for maintaining and running a magical house. Let’s break it down.

OPTION ONE: NON-MAGIC PEOPLE vs HOUSE ELVES

Yep, we are going to be dropping some Filtch lore today.

So in canon, it’s really hard to explain why that man (who isn’t able to do magic) has that job (caretaking an entire magical castle.) But I’m going to do my best to make it work. Because pre Statute of Secrecy, it actually makes a lot of sense that old medieval buildings like Hogwarts and Malfoy Manor would have been staffed by muggles. 

I mean, the only reason you build castles (big, easily defensible fortresses) is so they can be the last line of defense if anything happens to the serfs who are renting/farming your land. The peasants supply food/clothes/weapons/luxury products to the Lord of the manor/castle, and in return they are protected (in theory.) That’s feudalism. If anything, being a wizard would just make you a better Lord. There’s no way the Malfoys or the Founders would have been sitting at the center of a community of only wizards, there aren’t enough wizards. Also, if you want someone to run/maintain your house and you’re choosing between Muggles and house-elves… in a lot of cases, muggles are actually better.

Like okay, house-elves are slaves, which means they would be cheaper than Muggle peasants, but like… not a lot cheaper. Also, there’s got to be some upfront cost of time/money/effort in order to catch a house-elf and bind them to your house. Once you start getting generations of house-elves that’s not a problem, but when you’re setting up a household… yeah I think getting in a staff of muggles would be quicker and easier.

The other thing house elves do have in their favor is that they’re really really powerful. A single house-elf is much more effective than a single human servant. But… they’re also kind of too powerful? If you have a human servant who betrays you, does a bad job, or that you just don’t like… you can fire them, imprison them, and (if you’re a wizard) oblivate them so they can’t tell anyone your secrets. 

None of that works with house-elves. Unlike a human you can’t bribe them (because they have a culture that doesn’t value money.) You can’t imprison them (because whatever magic prevents wizards from apparating doesn’t work on them. Dobby gets in and out the Malfoy dungeons just fine.) I’m also assuming you can't obviate them, because if you COULD then oh my god, Barty Crouch Senior would have 1000000% obviated Winky. 

Until house-elves are freed they do seem to have some magical compulsion that prevents them from speaking ill of their masters…  but they can clearly still mess their masters up pretty bad if they want to. Dobby spends all of Book 2 undermining Lucius. Kreacher spends all of Book 5 undermining Sirius (and honestly is the catalyst for the Battle of the Department of Mysteries.) This doesn’t even seem out of the ordinary: Tom Riddle framed Hokey for Hepzibah Smith’s murder, and apparently everyone bought it. That's another reason a muggle would be a solid choice: even if they wanted to kill a wizard, it would be nearly impossible. But Kreacher and the Hogwarts house-elves actively fight wizards during the Battle of Hogwarts.

So if you have a house-elf that you can’t trust, basically your only response is to free them. Which is bad, because they know all your secrets and can now talk to whoever they want (Dobby absolutely bad-mouths the Malfoys after he's freed. It’s super plausible that Winky could’ve said something about Barty Junior while she was smashed off Butterbeer.) So really… the only truly safe option is to kill them. And it seems like you have to kill them by hand, like with a sword. The Blacks did sign up for this, and we can see their wall of decapitated house-elf heads as proof. House elves do make more sense for the Blacks, because I'm thinking if they became powerful at around the same time as the Statute, they would have been setting up new muggle-less households, not adapting old ones to the new paradigm. But then, not everyone is as hard-core as the Blacks. The Malfoys, for example, actually seem quite squeamish about violence. Draco is also very happy to refer to what Hagrid does as "servant stuff," which means he's comfortable with that particular worldview.

Now, Hogwarts also has house-elves, and they certainly don’t seem to kill them. Of course it's a school rather than a house - if one of those elves went rouge, what damage could they really do? Compare that to Dobby who like, if had wanted to put Lucius Malfoy in Azkaban… he could give some really damning evidence. Lucius Malfoy’s defense was that he was under the Imperius curse. Dobby knows that’s not true. Dobby knows where all the contraband in that house is, Dobby knows that diary belonged to Voldemort, he knew Lucius was threatening Hogwarts on purpose. Maybe elves aren’t allowed to testify in front of the Wizangamot, but Dobby, bring that info to Arthur Weasley. Bring it to Dumbledore. If I were Lucius Malfoy, I would be terrified. Even if I had other house elves, I don’t know if I’d keep them around after second year. Definitely not after Kreacher went rouge and betrayed Sirius, which *Narcissa* knows all about.

Hogwarts also has Filch (and Hagrid, who *also* can't do magic, at least on paper.) And I guess I could see an interpretation where if Hogwarts was initially designed to be run by Muggles, then maybe there are certain functions of the castle that can only be performed by Muggles. Like, we all know there’s something weird going on with Mrs. Norris. She’s too smart, she’s the only animal who shows up on the Marauder’s map, she’s telepathically bonded with Filch. So, maybe she is the manifestation of some magical function that oversees the castle, and maybe you need someone without magic to properly access her magic. Like if a witch/wizard tried to bond with her, their magic gets in the way of the castle’s magic. I’ll buy that. 

Eventually though, Salazar Slytherin started becoming wary of Muggles, so maybe he started a process of phasing out any muggle servants working in the castle and replacing them with house-elves. That makes sense to me. And if the castle needed non-magic workers… squibs would be a good compromise. 

OPTION TWO: AUTOMATED MAGIC

So we know you can cast a spell on an object, and then that object will just sit and do nothing until the spell is triggered. Fred and George’s hats don’t do anything until you put them on - and then they turn your head invisible. You are not doing anything to cast the spell, it’s all in the hat.  Presumably their cloaks and gloves that deflect curses work the same way. 

We also see a lot of this kind of delayed-action magic when it comes to magical protections for locations. Dumbledore has spelled Grimauld Place to send specters at anyone who comes through the door. Muggle-repelling charms don’t do anything until a Muggle comes in proximity. Voldemort’s inferi trap in the cave is filled with magical objects that don’t activate until certain conditions are met. Also, these are not single-use protections that you need to replace every time they’re triggered. Once they're set up, it seems like they keep working until they're taken down.

We also know that there are plenty of spells to make running a household easier. We see Mrs. Weasley use spells to cook, to make clothes, she has whole books full of household magic. So my thought is - if you can bewitch the outside of a house to respond to certain conditions, then why not the inside of a house? How hard would it really be to bewitch a fireplace so it turns on every time someone walks into the room? I bet you could get beds that make themselves, carpets that clean themselves, make it so that certain meals are always cooked at certain times, and served in specific places. The house probably cycles through a set number of meals, and some of the food options would be slightly eccentric because that piece of food-magic was set in 1702. But it all seems very doable, in a programmable smart-house sort of way. Especially if you’re the Malfoys and have nothing but money, time, and a love of the ~*~*aesthetic*~*~ Because the aesthetic of a house like this would be absolutely peak. Very spooky fairytale, invisible servant, romantic Beauty-and-the-Beast castle vibes. 

I think this is the option that Malfoys would have chosen, when they no longer had access to Muggles to run their house for them. Apart from the heightened security and a cooler aesthetic, the Malfoys were very against the Statute of Secrecy, so I bet that (for a while at least) they were kind of hoping that it would be reversed and things would go back to the way they were. So, not as motivated to start building up a household staff of house-elves, which is a pretty irreversible decision. 

The Malfoy also like to keep secrets. In the present day of the book, we know they have contraband cursed objects, contraband poisons, a hidden room to keep all of their contraband in underneath the drawing room floor. I don’t think this is a particularly recent state of affairs. Going back to the 1700s, if the Malfoys were ordered to cut off all these very profitable ties with the muggle world… yeah they’re not doing that. They are definitely hiding income coming in from the muggle world, or muggle retainers that they were kind of supposed to obviate and didn’t. 

In the main timeline of the books, I think it makes a lot of sense that Dobby is a Black family house elf that came over with Narcissa when she and Lucius were first married. And I say that because… Dobby is a mess, and Lucius Malfoy puts a lot of stock in looking good while out in public. The Hogwarts house elves look neat and presentable. Winky’s tea-towel toga looks clean and neat. Dobby is shambling around a snot-stained torn pillowcase, is Lucius not embarrassed? 

My thought is that he kind of resents Dobby: he’s the Black family passive aggressively saying that Lucius can’t take care of Narcissa, or maybe he suspects that the Blacks are sending Dobby over as a spy, whatever. But whatever the reason he can’t get rid of him - first because he doesn’t want to offend his in-laws (Dobby is the equivalent of an ugly lamp that you keep in the closet unless the people who gave you the lamp are visiting.) Then Dobby witnesses the entire war, which makes him way, way too much of a liability to free. 

So that’s my answer. tl;dr - the Malfoys are a very private family with a long-standing distrust of the Ministry, with a house that was set up to be run by Muggles. It makes the most sense that they have retrofitted that house with automated magic, until it’s basically able to run itself. And then, whenever they’re throwing an event, or something a little too complicated for the house's magic to handle… just hire in a staff of wizards to work one or two nights.

[furiousgoldfish]

(osdd, behaviour theories)

I've figured out from my interactions with other alters that I must be kind of a caretaker, at least for the children, other adult parts don't seem to need care. I am the only adult part who consistently attempts to take care of the children, even as they consistently reject me.

I'm starting to think that maybe if I'm in the caretaker role, this is my problem with interacting people in real life; my instincts are still just to take care of people, especially people younger than me, and I often give in to that impulse, and end up doing a lot to make other people's lives easier, to offer them comfort, food, favours, information that might be helpful, company when they need it, entertainment, validation, and pretty much anything else they might want. I usually do it because I can't watch them struggle on their own, knowing that I can make things easier for them, and they don't need to figure everything out alone if I'm here. It also triggers me when they're in pain and alone because I was in pain and alone all my life, to see that reflected in others is excruciating and I end up doing everything I can to prevent that.

But, all these people consistently end up doing harm to me, I've complained before about how I've had to cut off, or have been betrayed in insane amount of friendships, it keeps happening. I've thought a lot about why does it happen, why can't I ask even one thing out of them without them acting brutal in return, people would get angry at me even if I just ask them to sit down and watch a video with me so I would calm down. And there's been extreme harm, one of them stole money from me, creating huge financial troubles, some of them broke my stuff, when it was obvious that I only have very little and depend on what I have, they never replaced what they broke, even when I asked them to. Lots of them attempted or even succeeded into forcing me to do something against my will for them, some of them turned on me and started insulting and attacking me for being sick, some of them threatened me, or attempted to physically hurt me.

It's always the most unexpected batshit thing that happens and I get heartbroken because, I'd never do it to them, or anyone, and I've invested energy and care into these people and never hoped to get anything in return, but it was beyond me that it would come back to hurt me.

So, naturally as the result of all that, I've decided to stop caretaking, but here's the thing; I can't stand it. I literally can't stand seeing a person in need and not offering help. I've berated myself for it, attempted to keep distance and act apathetic, and it's still like a compulsion, it chafes on me to know there's someone somewhere in pain and I'm not by their side making it better.

And now I've started thinking, wait, what if this is the osdd thing? Because I'm the caretaker part of the system, that's my role, it's what I was made for in the system, and being constantly in the real world, I end up caring for other people. The system rejects me so I am not able to care for the other parts of me, and I end up doing it for other real people instead.

Is this why I do everything? Is this why I made this blog? Because I'm a misguided caretaker created to comfort my other parts but then I couldn't and now I'm just stuck trying to help just anyone I possibly could? Is this just a manifestation of osdd dysfunction?

I'm now questioning everything I do, trying to connect it to my role, but it does feel like I do things desperately trying to help others, but I'm also at this point, terrified of others, and still can't stop trying to help anyway. I feel cursed. I wonder how it would be to not be so separated from the parts of me that are more apathetic and even hateful of other people, I think for sure the urge to take care of them would go down. I feel so dysfunctional.

[my-pjo-stuff]

Alrighty so my poll about my Luke AUs recently finished, and Brainwashed!Luke came out on top! The people have spoken, and as such I shall not keep them waiting!

(Click here for the OG post)

More Brainwashed!Luke stuff :

-The brainwashing itself is done by Clovis and a few other Hypnos kids teaming up on Luke. I actually struggled quite a bit figuring out how exactly the brainwashing could be achieved, but settled on the Hypnos kids using their powers in the end. -Luke was kept at the Big House while Percy and Thalia were of talking/negotiating with the kids. Only once that's done and over with, and Percy returns with the "rules" the gods gave them for keeping Luke does he get brainwashed. - The rules the gods gave for Luke are that he's never allowed to wield and sort of weapon or power ever again. Neither is he allowed to fight or partake in any fighting action ever again. -At first, Luke thought they were going to interrogate him or something when the Hypnos kids entered together with Annabeth and Percy to do the brainwashing. -The whole process has BIG horror movie vibes. -There are some cryptid talks from Annabeth and Percy. The main reason they are here in the first place is that A) The camp hopes having Annabeth there will get Luke to resist less and B) having Percy there to protect people in case Luke gets free. Annabeth tells Luke about how camp missed him, and asks him why he left them. -She also tells him about Thalia joining the Hunt. -Luke reacts reasonably hostile like you'd expect it. At first, the talk confirms his assumption of this being an interrogation.... until slowly, he picks up on hints. -The way Annabeth and Percy look at him as if planning something. The presence of multiple Hypnos kids for seemingly no reason, the questions about what Luke thought of camp, and his feelings for/about the campers. -He realizes that something is up when Annabeth finally drops the bomb and tells him that he belongs with them here at camp. Even if he's too blinded by his own hate to see it.

-Luke realizes that something more is going on there- even if he can't phantom what exactly the camp has been planning. It get's to the point where he's being physically held down by Percy and Annabeth to allow Clovis and his siblings to get to work. -He attempts to reason with them, telling them- almost begging- that whatever they are doing it won't work. To please stop. That there are other ways.

-It's a mix of hypnotism and memory alteration/erasure that was done to Luke. -There aren't many people taking real issue with the fact that Luke was well, brainwashed. Both Chiron and Mr.D just sort of accept it. It actually works in their favor quite a bit, since Luke now functions as a 24/7 caretaker and moral support for the campers again which takes stuff off their plate again. -Rachel avoids Luke like the plague once she becomes the oracle though. The same goes for Chris- he's one of the only few taking issue with what was done to Luke. But he's too scared to talk with anyone about it, so he just keeps his mouth shut.

-One time he did break down in brainwashed!Luke's arms though, apologizing for not doing something against what was done to him and for keeping quiet out of fear. Luke has no idea what Chris is talking about of course- his memories are scrambeled at best, but he still attempted tp comfort him. -It didn't help at all, Chris caught himself after a while and asked Luke to keep quiet about it before leaving. To this day Luke has no idea what went down there. -Brainwashed!Luke doesn't remember his life outside of camp. He still knows that he and Annabeth have a long history and he took care of her before they came to camp aswell as having known Thalia, but outside of that everything is fuzzy. Neither does he remember the quest he went on, and MUCH less does he remember anything having to do with Kronos. -There's a mental compulsion placed on Luke to make him not question stuff that works fully. It doesn't even come to Luke's mind.

-Kronos managed to be kicked out. Turns out that playing with someone's memories and mind also allows someone to detect foreign presences and shut down the link. (Don't question it, it's for the plot) -Luke also believes to just always having been horrible at fighting and disliking it. To the point of never even wanting to pick up a sword. -The other campers keep him plenty busy with all kinds of other stuff and keep him purposefully away from any weapons or weapon/fighting involving ability -Ofcourse this all means that he's completely defensless and at the mercy of monsters, which is why Luke's just kept at camp year-round again.

-Silena for her part isn't sure how to react to this. On one hand she knows that Luke's mind was horribly violated, and that it is just objectivley wrong what was done to him. On the other hand it's not like she doesn't enjoy having the "old Luke" back. Especially now since she slowly started getting second thoughts about this whole spy thing.....

[basuralindo]

Hey do you think Jamil has trouble seeing people his age as peers?

Like, growing up having to be a caretaker to a guy literally a few months older than him, always expected to act like the adult in the situation, expected to work with adults and adopt their perspectives and pick up their slack. Do you think he just, forgets sometimes?

I mean we've seen him go into caretaker mode with other sophomores, and the only people I've seen him take seriously are juniors like Vil who also act much older than they should have to (his reactions to Leona look more like a trauma response and I don't wanna get into it here). People like Malleus and Cater still somewhat get the caretaker treatment. Like I just highly doubt that he subconsciously realizes he's actually part of his age group

Aaand that inevitably brings up Azul, who also acts like he thinks he's older than he is. Whether you're looking at it from a shipping angle or not, he reacts to Azul like an actual peer. With older students, he seems more in his element but there's still a status hierarchy which he compulsively reacts to. With Azul he doesn't acknowledge any status worth respecting or see him as someone who needs to be looked after. He just bickers like an equal, in a way that implies he actually does see Azul as a real peer, like subconsciously he's categorized this guy into the same group as himself, who was previously alone on that level (he gets like this more with the twins too, over time, but it seems to start with Azul).

And my favorite part about this is, while that response stems from them both acting more like adults in general, they elicit a pettiness from each other which drags them both down to actually acting their own age, and I just love that. Their characters are perfect foils for each other and it seems to make them both less isolated in a way.

[paragonrobits]

on the question of 'does the ice crown make you want to be a Dad to reflect the OG Gunter viewing Evergreen as a father', let us look at the behavior of everyone to wear the crown and whether this contrasts with their behavior otherwise

Gunter: the original wearer of the crown, he put it on and immediately started blasting ice everywhere and just shouting GUNTER NO because that's all Evergreen was to him. if there's a paternal aspect to this, he wasn't around long enough for it to happen

Farmworld Finn: An interesting question. He definitely has a large family; the largest family of any Finn incarnation. But the thing about it is that every version of Finn we've seen grow up, barring Our Finn (and that's largely because we don't really see much of him later on in life, just hints), they always have a number of children, and ALWAYS named Jay and Bonnie. So it seems a bit more likely that this is just part of who Finn is, not the crown lingering on him. Farmworld Finn DOES have the largest number of kids, though its hard to say if that's significant or not. Additionally, he doesn't really act particularly fatherly (even account for being just a kid at the time) while wearing the crown. He's manic, demented and almost a walking horror story, but he's not inclined to take care of other people except in a vaguely proactive and twisted way.

Vampire King: he is clearly the biggest question here and the one that makes this an important question. Does his treatment of Marceline as a spoiled rotten monster suggest the crown is making him more paternal, in a twisted way? I would say that his behavior isn't actually that different from what we see of him, and in fact this is a pretty common vampire trope in itself, where the eldest and strongest vampire has vampire heirs that get special treatment. Of note, he explicitly does not have any physical alterations or the mental changes of the crown at all, which would suggest that its not affecting him at all. If the crown DOES make you father material, it would be strange for that to be the ONLY change to him while he is otherwise completely unchanged.

Simon Petrikov: Whoo. Here this is. The big one. The most important question here. It haunts my dreams and torments my memories, and the answer either way completely changes and influences Simon's entire character and his interactions with others. If the Crown makes you fatherly, then his relationship with Marceline was purely a result of that. The one good part of being Ice King being a compulsion he was helpless to resist; that makes it HORRIFYING. The one happiness he has here being just another part of the crown making him into something he wasn't. And the flipside is this; that in some way, everything he suffered was worth as one tiny part of himself remained intact, making him paternal and a caretaker in his own strange way; first to Marceline, then to the penguins. I keep having images of Simon wanting to be a father and have a family long before meeting Betty or finding the crown, and it just feels so RIGHT for it to ultimately have granted him that wish.

So let us compare and contrast his behavior towards the other wearers of the crown, and the interesting bit is that there are VERY few common denominators, whether in behavior or not. The crown turns you into a mutated image of Evergreen, but the actual personality changes vary REALLY wildly; Ice King becomes maniacal and prone to mood swings (And we see that Simon himself has a pretty violent streak when annoyed), Finn is a destructive force of nature with a dissonant serene attitude as he freezes the world to save it, the Vampire King is completely unaltered, and Gunter was just completely out of it. There's very little behavior in common, and most interestingly it seems to amplify your personality traits, not completely change them.

Few of them have fatherly vibes at all; Simon sticks out for it being the most consistent aspect of his character, and perhaps significantly here, its most present BEFORE he completely loses himself to the Ice King persona, and is otherwise mainly present in subtextual impulses and Ice King's behavior when he's in a good mood.

Perhaps most tellingly of all, the opportunity to help others is what snaps Simon out of apathy in Fionna And Cake, suggesting it is a deep seated part of himself; while it's not IMPOSSIBLE that this is a lingering aspect of the crown, I suggest that its something fundamental to Simon himself, amplified and warped by the crown.

In this vein, those years he spent with Marceline before he couldn't win against the crown anymore were retroactively the happiest in his life; he doesn't have the lingering doubts or questions if he could have done better as with Betty, and he can't remember much of his time as Ice King for good or bad. Being Marceline's father is the best part of himself, he might think, and his character strongly circles around protecting, caretaking, and supporting others.

[roll-for-headmate]

hiiii! love your blog theme ♡ could i possibly get 2 headmates? for headmate #1, a masc/neu hobgoblin artificer (armorer subclass) who hoards xenogenders. for headmate #2, either a cleric or paladin (up to you, any subclass except oathbreaker), who would function as an assidumate or assistant of sorts? if you're not up to making two at this moment, i'd prefer importance be placed on #2. ty in advance!

- @roses-bah-garden ♡♡

⟣ COMMISSION ACCEPTED

Thank you, dear patron, for your commission! We've located two guild members who fit your criteria, but feel free to make any modifications necessary so they can assist you more effectively.

We at the Adventurer's Guild enjoy your blog greatly, so your patronage is an honor! A xenogender-hoarding hobgoblin armorer, and a dealer's choice paladin assidumate below the cut.

₊⁺໒ Name: Ix, Akevor, Nol

₊⁺໒ Race: Hobgoblin

₊⁺໒ Class: Artificer

₊⁺໒ Subclass: Armorer

₊⁺໒ Background: Ex-Gladiator 

₊���໒ Faith/Deity: Maglubiyet

⠂⠄⠄⠂⠁⠁⠂⠄⠄⠂⠁⠁⠂⠄⠄⠂ ⠂⠄⠄⠂

₊⁺໒ Age (by Race): 23

₊⁺໒ Sex: Intersex

₊⁺໒ Gender: Bxy, XenoAddict, CatGender, CatSockGender, SillyCatBoyGender, VampCatGender, KittyBoy, CatPawGender, SillyCatGender, FluffCatic, TiredCatGender, JumpinCatGender, SillyPixelCatGender, :3Gender, NocStuffic, HyperGender, DrawStringChewStimmic, MoonBoy, DoodleGender, StealerHoarder, JumpyGender, PaintGender, TBHGender, HappyEmojic, ToulouseGender / ToulouseCharic, OrangeCatGender, Hammorlletade

₊⁺໒ Pronouns: Mirrored; Hx/Hxm; It/Its; Cue/Cute; 🐈/🐈s; 🐈‍⬛/🐈‍⬛s; 🐾/🐾s; Kit/Kits; Kit/Kitty; Paw/Paws; Purr/Purrs; H!!/H!!m; Ki/Kits; >.</>.<s; Pop/Pops; Mrrp/Mrrps; 🌈/🌈s; 🖍️/🖍️s; Beep/Beeps; Boop/Boops; Beep/Boops; Dear/Dears; Song/Songs; Wilt/Wilts; Fi/Fir; Hy/Hymn; Rad/Rads; Toy/Toys; Fizz/Fizzs; Joy/Joys; Yip/Yips; 🌻/🌻s; ☀️/☀️s; 🍒/🍒s; Chao/Chaos; ✏️/✏️s; 🎨/🎨s

₊⁺໒ Orientation: Aromantic Achillean

₊⁺໒ Personality: Hopeless Romantic, loyal, and passionate, kit strives to keep the mood high. H!! Loves to create and improve on existing creations, and pop gets great satisfaction from finding solutions to problems that stump others. 

⠂⠄⠄⠂⠁⠁⠂⠄⠄⠂⠁⠁⠂⠄⠄⠂ ⠂⠄⠄⠂

₊⁺໒ Roles: Joy-Bringer, Energy Booster

₊⁺໒ CisIDs: Pink Eyes, Star Pupils, Pink Skin, Pointed Ears, Scars, Harmed, PTSD, Hallucinations, ForcedKiller

₊⁺໒ TransIDs: PermaMakeup, PermaEyeLiner, TransCat, Cat-Coded, NekoAbled, TranshEDS, TransLavPTSD, TransAmbulatoryWheelchairUser, TransHarmless, NullAge, TransInnocent, TransMarried(?), FreakSpouse, TransHopeful, NullAromantic, TransAlloromantic, MirrorHarmed, OpinionFluid

₊⁺໒ MUDs: Flash Memory Stress Disorder / FMSD

₊⁺໒ Color Palette:

₊⁺໒ Faceclaim(s):

₊⁺໒ Name: Facesh, Estath, Nelrul

₊⁺໒ Race: Dragonborn

₊⁺໒ Subrace: Blue

₊⁺໒ Class: Paladin

₊⁺໒ Subclass: Oath of Redemption

₊⁺໒ Background: Folk Hero

₊⁺໒ Faith/Deity: Talos

⠂⠄⠄⠂⠁⠁⠂⠄⠄⠂⠁⠁⠂⠄⠄⠂ ⠂⠄⠄⠂

₊⁺໒ Age (by Race): 26

₊⁺໒ Sex: Female

₊⁺໒ Gender: Stormgender Sleepic Dragonhoardic

₊⁺໒ Pronouns: Shi/Hir; Av/Avym; Wy/Wyrm; Gol/Golds; Ix/Ixs; Storm/Storms; Zap/Zaps; Zzz/Zzzs; Snooze/Snoozes; Dream/Dreams

₊⁺໒ Orientation: Demisexual

₊⁺໒ Personality: Loves to help people and has a strong work ethic, golds standards are extremely high, and av will not tolerate any less than the best in wyrm surroundings. Ix can come across as arrogant as a result, but storms intentions rarely come from a bad place. 

⠂⠄⠄⠂⠁⠁⠂⠄⠄⠂⠁⠁⠂⠄⠄⠂ ⠂⠄⠄⠂

₊⁺໒ Roles: Assidumate, Caretaker

₊⁺໒ CisIDs: Fin Ears, Horns, Lightning Breath, Blue Scales, Gold Eyes, Tail, Lightning Resistance, Electric Resistance, Narcolepsy, OCD

₊⁺໒ TransIDs: TransDragonWings, TransAsthma, TransInhaler, PermaAwake, TransClusterB, TransCleaningSkill, SuperCleaningSkill, TransMaid

₊⁺໒ MUDs: Big Sister Compulsion Disorder (BSiCD)

₊⁺໒ Additional Details: followed by a gaggle of littles at most times

[runawaycarouselhorse]

People who don't bother to watch Fruits Basket or don't understand the psychology behind the character: Tohru is too perfect, she's unrealistic--

Yeah, that's the point, it's a fake persona she built up as a trauma response. She's taking on the caretaker role, compulsively taking care of others, being who they need her to be, trying to ignore her own pain, deny the reality of her mother's death by talking to the photograph, and bottle up her suffering.

She's a contrast to Akito, as the final season shows, too, as both are desperately afraid of losing love. The story about why she speaks so formally, because her father spoke that way, and she was scared her mother would follow him in death, so she hated him in a childish way, so she spoke the way he did in the hopes of securing her mother's love... they're similar in terms of their abandonment issues, they just present it very differently.

One can certainly argue we saw too little of it as viewers because of just how much she's become the mask and how she bottles everything up, but Tohru is as broken and human as everyone else in Fruits Basket, she's just also a very genuinely kind and trusting person, even if part of her motivations are born of "selfishness" (read: a natural desire to be loved, complicated by a fear of abandonment).

[wen-kexing-apologist]

Looking at your username: what is it about the Wen Kexing character that grabbed you? And are there any more recent BL characters that you feel similarly about?

Ohhhhh Ginny, I love you for this question.

I just have a massive soft spot for monsters. I think the monsters we see in stories are often so complex, so interesting, so hurt. The reason my username is wen-kexing-apologist is because Kexing did nothing wrong (I say this partially in jest). I love when the wrongs a generation, a family, a society has done to someone is what fuels their rage, I love when characters decide to embrace the label they have been branded as and use it to destroy the very thing that created them.

And I love when people see past that rage, that pain, that loneliness and are able to reach out a hand to it, and to love the person who has been buried underneath the fate that others pushed upon them.

WKX was a child who lost his family violently, whose family had been betrayed, who was taken in by the ghosts, stripped of his memories, and abused. Then when he got old enough he set off to kill everyone that had done him wrong. To destroy the martial arts world because they had destroyed his life and happiness.

[And as an aside, I love when stories allow for personal slights to be compared to the ruining of nations. In this case, that justice for Wen Kexing can only be served when the whole martial arts world has burned for what they let happen to his family.]

There are many other characters that work like this for me, who are outside of BL: The creature in Frankenstein, Nimona in Nimona, James Flint in Black Sails

In BL, honestly, I haven't seen that many BLs with characters that have the same vibes, they don't tend to have the time to unpack those types of characters. That said, I have such a soft spot for Vegas in KinnPorsche and Charn in Laws of Attraction (although that is technically a lakorn).

Getting way too personal here for a minute, I know how much room within me I need to store my rage. The rage I carry with me every day scares the fuck out of me, it is something I never want to unleash, because there have been moments in my life where I've let just a fraction of it loose and I know how good it felt. There are reasons, beyond just the fact that I am a massive fucking nerd, that swordfighting is my sport of choice, and some of that has to do with the fact that violence is the point. You aren't tackling someone to get a football, you aren't accidentally connecting shins to steal a soccerball, you are learning in swordfighting very specifically how to duel, how to fight, how to draw blood (but you're doing is safely, with protective equipment, and weapons made as safely as possible). All of which to say that there is a part of me that worries I am capable of channeling the level of rage characters like Wen Kexing have, and it is extremely comforting to me to see those characters heal, and to see those characters be loved by people who have seen the worst parts of them.

Perhaps it is conceited of me to say that I watch media so I can see myself in others, but that is so much of it for me. Seeing my relationship to one of my parents played out in Jam and Li Ming's relationship the first time we see the two of them on screen in Moonlight Chicken, the relationship I have to my other parent in the complexity of Sawsimol and Wang's relationship in 180 Degrees Longitude Passes Through Us. It's why I have a soft spot for Sand in Only Friends taking care of people who have shit on him, because I am a compulsive caretaker, who has given care to people who have treated me like shit. There are just terrible parts of me that recognizes the terrible parts of characters like Wen Kexing and finds comfort in that.

Also, Wen Kexing just serves major cunt, which is the only excuse anyone needs really.

[solarishashernoseinabook]

A list of prompts for the Autistic!Halt fic fest!

Feel free to use as many as you like! These prompts are NOT exclusive, so don't worry about any prompts being "taken" <3

Halt shutdown/meltdown, Will's reaction

Halt's interest is mythology and folklore.

He is good in languages and likes to learn them. But since he struggles with social skills, he doesn't speak as much as he would like to.

He loves animals.

He never worried about his behaviour until he hears castle staff whispering he's fae-kissed. He's read enough to know what they mean and he starts to mask.

He has sensory issues with clothes, food and weather (warm/cold). He also doesn't like it to be touched, though from some persons he allows it (e.g. Caitlyn can hug him).

He stims only around Caitlyn. With everyone else he masks

He loves to read and can get lost into it if not told to stop.

Aside from Caitlyn, Pritchard is the only one who knows about Halt's autism. He figured it out when Halt had a meltdown.

When he got apprentices, Halt spent lots of time in his room to prevent getting overwhelmed. Gilan and Will rather thought he was mad at them. Halt never told them, until they asked about it. Gilan learned about his autism when he was in his second year, Will only learned about it when he was about to finish his apprenticeship.

Halt has a special interest in flowers in his early years. In his older years, they’re not a special interest anymore but he holds a certain fondness for them. What’s his favorite type of flower? How does his bio family react vs. how his found family reacts? (I was going to put examples but the ideas were from other posts. Like how Caitlyn made a book of flowers for him, flower crowns, the possibility that he picks out flowers based on their meaning for certain situations…)

I can see Halt having alexithymia. So, how would that impact himself and his relationships? (Example from an article by Jessica Penot, who is autistic/has alexithymia, “I overcompensate by being a compulsive caretaker in relationships but have no idea how to let people into my inner world or explain it.” Also he might have trouble with telling how serious an injury on his person is until someone else notices).

Masking (well, attempting to mask) by copying his brother—

(Kind of related) practicing different expressions in the mirror with his brother’s/mother’s/father’s urging

Learning to unmask :’)

Abelard helping Halt with sensory issues/calming down.

A category 5 autism event happens and Halt ends up infodumping about his special interest to someone he feels safe with

An abrupt change of plans. No time to transition. Halt somehow has to hold it together for the next several hours

[theravenflies]

My Takes

Consider these

People with personality disorders are not inherently abusive. Yeah, even people with NPD and ASPD (why do I have to say that?) There is no such thing a narcissistic abuse. People with ASPD are not serial killers. They are people, stop putting them down for no reason. People with personality disorders are welcome here. All of them.

Armchair diagnosing is bad. I don't care how shit someone is, if you call them a narcissist, a psychopath, a sociopath, a compulsive/pathological liar, or literally any other disorder that they haven't been professionally diagnosed with, you're a dick. You can't know what's going on in their head. You are not their doctor and are not qualified to diagnose them. And it's just a dick move to diagnose Casey Anthony as someone with a heavily-stigmatized symptom THAT I ALSO HAVE HAD

Stop. Tagging. Your. Writing. With. Disability. Tags. The PTSD tag is nearly unusable because everyone tags their fics as PTSD. Stop it. That space is not for you. It's for us.

People with intellectual, developmental, cognitive, whatever disability deserve to be heard.

As do semispeaking and nonspeaking autistics.

Yes, we do need to listen to caretakers, they're how some people communicate. No one is invalid because they're a caretaker, they're invalid when they're an ableist caretaker.

If the autism "cure" were to exist right now, it would mean eugenics. I don't give a shit if you want it, it would mean eugenics. Society is way too anti-autism for us to trust non-autistics with a cure. I won't get into my rant about the concept of a cure unless asked, it doesn't matter. What does matter is that if that cure is created, it will be forced on people, even those who vehemently oppose it, so it can't exist yet without putting people in danger.

Autism Speaks is shit. So is National Autistic Society. So is the Autism Society. ASAN is on thin fucking ice.

Stop tagging political posts with NPD, ASPD, compulsive liar, or no empathy. You're being ableist and armchair diagnosing. And putting that shit on our feeds.

ABA is bad. Yes, always. All of it. I lost a friend to ABA and I will not budge on this. All pro-ABA people will be blocked, I do not give a shit.

I do not care about syscourse. I am not a system and am not qualified to have an opinion on it.

If you point out typos, grammar mistakes, or whatever when the other person hasn't explicitly said it's okay, stop. You're being ableist.

Stop using TBI as an insult. Yes, I was dropped on my head (okay, I fell, but still,) as a baby. Fuck you too.

This is a safe place for systems and I'm firmly anti-Split.

Autistic and intellectually disabled people are allowed to transition, be queer, get tattoos, drink, have sex, whatever, should they so want.

Mental age is bullshit. He doesn't have the mind of a two-year-old, he has the mind of an adult with IDD.

The posts of disabled people are not an excuse for you to trauma-dump. I don't care what your ex did, that person with NPD wasn't talking about them and it's a dick move to bring that up on their unrelated post.

People should not have to work to live. No one. Ever. Period.

Healthcare should be free

Caretakers need to stop killing their disabled charges

Autism Mommies (TM) are shitty people.

Don't even get me started on Fathering Autism (bitch, you aren't fathering autism, you're fathering ABBY)

Disabled people deserve dignity and privacy. All of them. Yes, even those ones. We're still people. You don't need to know how we go to the toilet.

Fiction does not determine morality and sending people anon hate telling them to kill themselves is a shitty thing.

Telling people to kill themselves in general is a shitty thing. What are you gonna do if they actually do it and you get arrested for manslaughter?

Trans kids deserve to transition, intersex kids deserve to not be mutilated and forced onto HRT when they can't or don't consent, children can and will be queer

Actual sex education needs to be standard

Label policing LGBT+ identities is bad

Devotees and "transableds" are not allowed here

Children and disabled people deserve to exist in public, even if you don't like us

Stop. Saying. Retard. Stop using autistic as an insult. Stop it and go to hell.

I'm pro-choice and I know you don't actually care about fetuses with Down Syndrome, you're just trying to guilt me.

I will reblog with more takes as they occur to me

And, most importantly, listen to ALL disabled voices. All of them. Every single one. We stand together or we don't stand a chance.

[ghostsandyoumightdie]

"Your mental illness doesn't make you a bad person!" OK but what about when it does. What about when you lose interest in everything, including your friends and family. When you are too miserable to do chores, and your loved ones pick up the slack. When you can't cook, or eat, or join people for meals. When the strain of your mental illness gives your spouse depression. When you attempt and now your caretaker has a $20k hospital bill. When you can't control your temper. When you can't raise your kids. When you compulsively lie. When you're a walking trigger for other mentally ill people just by existing.

People will say being mentally ill doesn't make you a bad person, ignoring that when you break it down into individual behaviors, a lot of us are fucking insufferable. The feeling of being a bad person, a bad friend, and a bad partner doesn't come from nothing. Being mentally ill sucks for everyone involved, and I'm tired of people ignoring that in favor of false platitudes. Or worse, putting the impetus on our loved ones to be supernaturally tolerant, patient, and resilient at the cost of their own health. Pretending that doesn't happen does not fucking help us.

[yaksha-garden]

What is a Yaksha?

cf. nymphs, fae, trolls, djinn, other strange and magical creatures and spirits who have much variation within their ranks.

A yaksha is a kind of nature spirit. The specifics vary greatly depending on what kind of nature spirit we are discussing.

A yaksha’s appearance and abilities are most readily determined by the environment they call home.

A yaksha might be squat with stony skin, adorned with monstrous horns, teeth, and claws, look more or less like a human, or anything in between. Yakshas tend to have sorcerous talent and the ability to shapeshift into animals, but not all cultivate these talents.

What sets yakshas apart and connects them is their ties to the land, as the appointed guardians of natural places and treasures. That being said, the average yaksha is a free being who might act as the caretakers of their home, or they might not, with nothing in the way of metaphysical consequences or compulsion to push them.

For some yakshas though, whether through ensorcellement or divine will, the duty to guard a place is more binding. But, they become more powerful for it. For simplicity, we will call these yakshas “wardens”, and they gain immortality and control over their realms, alongside other powers depending on their dominion and the reason they are bound to it. This is hardly official terminology.

A Keystone is a divinely-forged artifact designating it’s holder as the ordained guardian of a natural place or treasure sacred to the gods of Kubera’s Prism. Not all wardens are Keystone-bearers, but Keystone bearers are the most prestigious of the wardens, for to have one is to have impressed the gods. But with divine power comes divine responsibility – and scrutiny.

Most yakshas are born the usual way, to one or more yaksha parents. Yaksha families and communities are like any other in Kubera’s Prism – pastoral or agrarian, from martial to monastic. Wardens in the family or community tend to be teachers, advisors, historians, and sometimes spiritual leaders.

Sometimes, one will be born from the elements alone. The people of Kubera’s Prism tend to attribute special meaning to these children of the world, assuming their birth was ordained by the gods. Sometimes, they’re right.

In the old days, when there were humans in Kubera’s Prism, it’s said that becoming a yaksha was a way for the gods to rescue humans from the clutches of death and set certain plans into motion. They would weave fatal wounds closed with the power of the elements, and from then on the human-turned-yaksha was marked by fate. That’s how the people of Kubera’s Prism tell the tales today, anyways. The truth is close, but often bloodier.