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queers-gambit · 1 year ago

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Silence

prompt: ( requested ) anxiety plays tricks on your mind, making you mistake your boyfriend's stress for anger - at you.

pairing: Carmen 'Carmy' Berzatto x female!reader

fandom masterlist: FX's The Bear

word count: 2.5k+

note: it's short but to the point.

warnings: cursing, hurt and comfort, depiction of mental health: anxiety, slight self-destructive thoughts.

Silence could be a good thing.

Libraries were silent for ample focus. Theaters were silent during the showing. Sometimes, long drives were peacefully silent.

Silence could also be a bad thing.

Demanding an explanation and the silence stretches. The silence before a doctor delivers life-changing news. Asking someone if they're okay and they don't answer.

When your boyfriend, Carmy, had returned from work that evening, he slammed the front door, dropped his backpack, toed out of his shoes, and stormed around the apartment silently. He didn't greet you, didn't offer a kiss, nothing - just breezed past you as if a pile of dirty laundry he's ignored for the past two weeks. You watched him from the kitchen, sipping a glass of wine, worry sprouting in your gut and chest. It was obvious something was bothering him - but couldn't fathom what it was that made him ignore you; to make him not look at you one single time.

It was like you weren't even there with the way he projected his moodiness. Even on his worst days, he always always always greeted you with a kiss; but the lack of affection hallowed your chest into a pit, wondering what you had done to make him avoid you.

Suddenly, the silence was eerily deafening, coiling your stomach and pumping lead through your veins; no TV or radio switched on to fill the void and create passive, background audio. Carmy was obviously upset about something, but the fact that he didn't even look at you made you think he didn't want to talk. This worried you because before dating, you and Camry Berzatto were the best of friends; talking about literally any and everything you could think of. He came to you with every single grievance, every frustration, every slice of drama - so why wouldn't he now?

Unless... Unless you were the cause of his annoyance? The idea made the pit in your chest stretch to your gut - anxiety rapidly spreading, confusion warping rational thought into something darker and self deprecating. The idea of upsetting Carmy - or anyone, for that matter - was enough to bubble nausea and turn your skin clammy. Muscles tensed, eyes darted, and your mind was plagued with every single thing you had said or done in the past 16 hours.

However, your memory couldn't pinpoint any moment you could've upset him; things had been normal and easy-going lately, there being no clear indication you were the culprit of Carmy's anger. However, there didn't need to be anything clear because your mind was fully convinced you were the bad guy now.

After swallowing a gulp of wine, your eyes adverted to give him privacy and begin on dinner; being obvious that his phone was much more important than you right now. Unfortunately, when it came to picking which sauce to dress your meal with, you were forced to slowly enter the living room where your boyfriend had taken refuge.

"Hey, baby?"

"Hmm?"

You tried not to be offended by his lack of verbal acknowledgement, but your intestines flipped and grew heavy. "Uh, just wondering, you want the marinara or Alfredo tonight with the - "

"Doesn't matter, you choose."

"I mean, which would you prefer?"

"I just said it didn't matter," he repeated with a hardening tone, "it's not like it's a difficult decision to make."

You didn't want to make his attitude worse, so you backed off silently and returned to your task. Yes, yes, Carmy was the professional cook between you but that didn't mean he wanted to come home and continue the act. So, you learned a few new recipes to keep meals interesting - a feat your boyfriend didn't seem to appreciate or even recognize most days. Tonight especially.

Tension tangibly filled the apartment the longer the silence stretched. Your mind conjured a hundred questions at once, begging your mouth to run rapidly if it meant getting answers - yet your logic stuck the words in your throat, refusing to let them fly, and even shoving them deep down for your soul to hold.

You poured a second glass of wine, throat thickening with silent emotion. There was always the worry in the back of your mind that Carmy would one day realize you didn't fit into his life and would break up with you. Or that perhaps, his irritation tonight wasn't due to anything you did specifically, but instead, was attested to your normal behavior and quirks - like the want to talk throughout the day.

Blinking the moisture away, you remembered Carmy hadn't answered a single one of your texts the entire day - a normal act for you, but maybe one that now got on your boyfriend's nerves. You dished up dinner, standing in the open kitchen with two plates and feeling silly for the nerves prickling your skin. You barely noticed the slight tremor in your hands. "Dinner's ready, Carm," you alerted, leaving the plates on the kitchen island you normally ate at; distracted by the need to pour a glass of water.

When you turned, your heart stalled in your chest when you noticed his plate missing - locating him in the living room, again, and it being obvious he didn't intend to eat with you. Now you knew for sure, you had indeed done something. So, you gingerly took a seat and tried to take up as little space as possible; shying in on yourself, eating silently and quickly so you could do the dishes right after.

Sure, there was usually the rule that the cook didn't clean, but there was no way you were gonna ask Carmy to do the simple chore; afraid of pushing him over whatever edge he teetered at. After storing any leftovers, you started the dishwasher and retreated to your bedroom with another glass of wine and the intention to get a bath. You felt like a glaring inconvenience all of a sudden, regret inking your blood and reprimanding yourself for being so - so - so... Clingy?

Is that what it was? Did Carmy think you were clingy? Perhaps texting him throughout the day without him ever answering was the final straw of annoyance he felt toppled the haystack. You wanted to apologize and eliminate the tension, but couldn't necessarily understand what you were sorry for; thinking you were simply paying attention to him, being attentive and interested in his everyday life.

Maybe you needed to apologize for being suffocating? Was that it? Your love was suffocating him? Was he feeling pressured by you? Did he think you two too comfortable in this relationship? Was your wall of texts an indication you were more serious than he? Oh, God, was that it - did Carmy think you were getting too serious, too fast?

Granted it'd been a few years of dating, a lifetime of friendship before that - so how much more serious could you get? Why would your attempts of communication rub him the wrong way? How could the pair of you ever manage to fall off from the same page? Make him think you were pushing for something more? Didn't he know he was enough for you? Didn't he appreciate your presence? The want to be closer? Your desire to maintain the friendship your relationship was built off of? The appreciation you had for him? The support you wanted to offer?

You soaked in epsom salt for the better part of half an hour. Draining the tub, drying off, and changing into pajamas were done silently; feeling almost fearful to venture out of the bedroom to return your wine glass to the sink.

So you decided to just get in bed, figuring if Carmy was so angry at you that it resulted in him ignoring you, he wouldn't want to sleep beside you, either. With your thick framed glasses on, you nestled into bed with your newest novel, trying not to let your mind go into overdrive as your need to fix whatever was upsetting Carmy was overwhelming. Yet there was also the nagging idea that trying to fix whatever was 'broken' would've made things worse - again, resulting in you doing nothing and giving Carmy his space.

The silence haunted the apartment like a ghostly presence; leering over your heads, embracing you uncomfortably.

When the bedroom door opened, you masked your surprise and just read the same paragraph three times in a row - distracted by your boyfriend milling around, preparing for bed. Your eyes widened in shock when the bed dipped and shifted, jostling you as Carmy got into bed beside you, but you still didn't look up from your book.

"What're you reading, sweetheart?"

His mood swings often gave you whiplash. You glanced at Carmy, finger holding your place to let you fold the book over and present the title on the cover. You worried that anything you said and did could make this tension fester, so, you remained silent and went back to reading.

"Is it any good?" He pondered, watching your profile. You nodded mutely, lips slowly rolling between your teeth in a show of anxiety Carmy could now recognize. "Hey, hey, you all right, babe?" He asked softly, sounding mildly confused - perhaps even alarmed.

"Yeah, 'course," you mumbled.

"Well, how was work?"

"Fine."

"You sure?"

"Mhm."

There was a brief pause, then Carmy gently pried, "C'mon, baby, what's wrong? Why're you so quiet?" He chuckled gently, "Usually so talkative in the evenings."

You offered him a bewildered look with slightly pinched brows, swallowing nervously and slowly shutting your book to trace the spine mindlessly in an effort to distract yourself. Typically when anxious, your hands needed stimulation, something tangible to do and feel when your mind numbed with nervousness.

With a great deal of bravery, more than you thought was necessary to muster when talking to the person you love, you asked softly, "Are you mad at me, Carm? I mean, did I do something? T-To upset you?"

"Wait, what?" He asked in confusion. "Nah, baby, you didn't do anything, why would you even ask?"

"'Cause you've been ignoring me...?"

He scoffed, "Ah, 'cause I didn't answer your texts?"

"That, and you've been ignoring me in favor of your phone since you got home. Slamming doors, brooding in the living room, didn't eat dinner with me - got a little snappy when I asked what sauce for dinner? Feels like I did something but I don't know what, so I don't know how to fix this."

Carmy sighed, leaning back to the mound of soft and fluffed pillows you had stacked on your shared bed. "Shit," he breathed, huffing a dramatic sigh, "didn't even realize I was doin' all that, baby."

"If you're mad, just tell me what I did - "

"No, no, hey, hey, hey, hey," he rushed, turning on his side to look at you, elbow supporting his weight; clocking the glassiness coating your eyes. "You didn't do anything, baby, I swear. There's nothing for you to fix 'cause you didn't do nothin'. I just - I've been havin' a shit day, didn't realize I was bein' mean to you let alone that you'd take it to heart."

"Kinda hard not to when I'm the only one here."

"No, right, I get that," he sighed. "I'm sorry, baby, I know you get anxious when I shut down like that, but I promise, I'm not mad at you."

"Well, who else would you be mad at? I thought you were annoyed 'cause I was texting you all day. Thought I was, I don't know, being clingy or something since you didn't answer me."

Carmen frowned, "Sweetheart, no, hang on, listen to me. You didn't do anything to upset me, okay? I didn't answer you 'cause I dropped my phone in the sink and it got all glitchy, I couldn't answer you. I tried to fix it when I got home, but I think I fried it - should just get a new one. It was just one of those days that everything went to shit, it all built up, got the better of me."

You nodded, still looking dejected and making a shot of guilt plunge his heart. "You usually talk to me when you're upset," you pointed out softly, "and when you didn't say anything, I thought I was the reason you were upset. Figured you wouldn't talk to me if I did something to cause your attitude."

"No, hey, I'm sorry, c'mere, baby," he opened his arms and curled them around you when you shuffled into his chest. "Shit, I'm really sorry, I didn't even realize what I was doing - but Goddamnit, that's no excuse, though. I don't mean t'take my shit out on you, you don't deserve that."

"I just got a little nervous, maybe let my anxiety get the better of me."

"That's okay," he promised, kissing your forehead, "I can understand why. I was a dickhead, being snappy and ignoring you when all you do is support and love me. I'm real sorry, sweetheart," he sighed against your skin, tightening his arms to keep you cocooned in his warmth. "You know, you can always talk to me - don't gotta shut yourself down and avoid me."

"Do you even hear yourself? Should take your own advice."

"Yeah, I should," he smirked. "Hey, promise I'll do better not to shut down like that."

You nodded in acceptance, wondering softly, "Do you wanna talk about it? Whatever happened today?"

"Uh, nah, you know what? Think I owe you some cuddles, maybe a dessert? You know, to make up for my bullshit attitude."

"You don't have to - "

"I got you all worked up, feels like the least I can do."

With a hum, you smirked, "I won't say no to a slice of cheesecake."

"What baby wants, she gets," he grinned, a hand caressing your cheek to direct your eyes up to his. His thumb swept back and forth under your eye, "Still sorry about today. I didn't mean to be such an oblivious dickhead, I swear."

You nodded, "I know, baby. Just don't shut me out next time. Had me worried when you didn't even kiss me when you got home."

"A heinous crime on my part," Carmy smirked. "Should I remedy that?"

"I'd be offended if you didn't."

He chuckled and pressed his lips to yours in a soothing kiss, hand sliding to the back of your neck. It was a slow and languid kiss, something he took his time in engaging; lips sticking together, moving in-sync, creating chains of saliva when he pushed his tongue against yours. "Yeah," he mumbled, "I'm the dumb fuck who had you thinkin' I didn't want this from you." He pressed another kiss to your waiting lips, "You're intoxicating, baby - always want your kisses. Yeah? Always. The day I don't, take me out back like Old Yeller."

You wanted to voice that he wanted your kisses now until one day, he simply wouldn't - but refrained from doing so because you knew it was just anxiety talking. So, instead, you chuckled at his comment and leaned in to initiate your own kiss.

requesting rules and masterlist

FX's The Bear masterlist

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utterlyotterlyx · 1 year ago

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When I Met The Devil

Azriel x Fem!Reader

Part Two to When I Kissed The Teacher which you can read here.

Summary - Azriel adored everything about you, but there was still certain information that you were keeping from him. Azriel finds out exactly what you've been hiding thanks to a particularly unfortunate visit.

Warnings - mentions of sexual abuse and neglect, angst, mentions of trauma

It had been three months since Azriel had taken you on your first (of many) dates. Azriel had been so nervous, not sure where to take you that would be able to live up to your expectations, even Nyx had given him some ideas by babbling on about what made you smile in the classroom.

Apparently you loved nature, of course you did, you were from the Spring Court. So Azriel had packed up a picnic and taken you to a garden of wildflowers away from the city to watch the sunset and gaze at the stars. You had taken his breath away when you had opened the door to him, you had dressed in a loose fitting pale blue dress with white flowers embellished into the bodice, the sleeves hung off of your shoulders and your hair lay unbound down your back.

That day had been one of the best days of his life, he had gotten to know you beyond your profession and learnt so much about you, but the nagging feeling that you were omitting some truth tugged at him, but not enough for him to make a deal about it. Azriel had kissed you under the stars, he had run his fingers through your hair and kissed you so passionately that you swore the world had stopped moving just so it could watch you

Since then, you had been inseparable.

Azriel showed up at the school each day after that, sometimes in the morning at drop off or in the evening at pick up, sometimes both, and he always brought you flowers or chocolates or anything he could think of that would bring a smile to those lips. He would walk you home, but more often than not he would pull you inside the River House and force you to have dinner with them.

You never objected to his wishes, you enjoyed his hands on you far too much to say no.

Azriel was happy to take things slow with you, you were so gentle and pure, if you wanted to wait years to share a bed with him then he was okay with that. You were worth any wait.

One morning you had opened the door to the school, frowning slightly when you couldn't see Azriel or Feyre and Rhys with little Nyx waiting on the grass. They would have told you if Nyx wasn't well and needed to take the day off unless it was serious, but even then, Azriel still would have showed up on the grass with our without Nyx just to see you.

It plagued your mind all day, and you did your best to conceal your worry from the children and continue as normal, but when it came to home time and none of them were there, you knew something wasn't right.

You had locked the room up quickly and stopped by a healer to pick up some infant friendly tonics just in case Nyx needed anything, bundling the vials in your hands as you rushed down the winding streets of Velaris, allowing your feet to take you where you needed to go whilst your mind reeled with endless possibility.

Lifting the hem of your skirt as you ascended the steps of the River House, you completely missed the scent that haunted your nightmares, too frantic with worry to notice it curling around you like chains. Then you saw the back of his head, shoulder length blonde hair and broad shoulders, and then the scent hit you, one of Spring rain and lifeful earth, and you dropped the vials in your hands onto the floor, not even flinching when they broke and cut through your skin.

The thing in question turned his head to the side and sniffed, smirking with feral delight before he fully turned to you, and you saw nothing else but him and those eyes that had made you do things you didn't want to too many times, they were dark and honed in on their prey. His lips tilted upward and he rose to his feet, and you didn't hear anything anyone else was saying or commanding as he strode across the room and stopped right in front of you. You didn't dare look up, you couldn't, and then his fingers gripped your chin harshly and forced your gaze upward.

"I've been looking for you," the room held a collective breath, his shoes crunched down on the broken glass and the liquid parted under his weight.

You knew that they were all watching you, waiting for you to say something, you averted your gaze to Azriel who was on his feet, fists clenched and glowering at the male who dared to touch you, "Nyx didn't show up to school, I thought he was sick, I was bringing tonics."

Feyre rose to her feet beside Rhys, "It's okay, Y/N," her eyes were soft, she could feel your terror, they all could, and then it seemed like your secret and finally been released from the depths of your shame, "Let go of her, Tamlin."

Tamlin chuckled but didn't take his eyes off of you, he cocked his head to the side and breathed you in, "Don't tell me to take my hands off what is mine," his voice was dangerously low, possession had taken over every part of him and the wolf was coming out to play, "Isn't that right, fiancé?"

"I'm not your fiancé," tears bubbled at the corners of your eyes and Azriel saw how small Tamlin made you feel, your shoulders had curled inward, your entire body was preparing to protect itself against the male who held your head in his hands. You looked to Azriel then, "I ran. I couldn't do it," you blinked hard and your tears flowed down your cheeks.

"Just because you ran doesn't mean that the agreement is void, Flower," you cringed, you felt helpless in his grip, like all of the independence you had worked for was nothing but dust dancing in the breeze, "The Tithe has been particularly awful without you."

Azriel lost it then, he grabbed Tamlin by the shoulder and forced him round, the action making his hand jolt away from your face, and Azriel landed a sickening blow to the side of his face.

"This is not a battle you want to fight, Tamlin," Rhys stood beside Azriel who was panting with fury, he knew what the Tithe was, they all did, and the thought of Tamlin using your unwilling body as a vessel for his sickening ritual was enough to send Azriel into a blind rage.

Azriel bent down to Tamlin's level, noticing Feyre rush to your side as he did to comfort you, and growled, "Touch her again and it won't be a battle, Tamlin. It will be a war."

Tamlin had the gall to grin, "She's my fiancé, Shadowsinger. Not even you can get between that."

"No, but I can," Cassian grabbed Tamlin by the neck of his coat, hauling him to his feet in front of Rhys, "Y/N is a member of the Night Court, she is a cherished member of my family. She is not your mate, so you have no claim on her and you know it. Now, leave my city before I cut your head from your shoulders and leave Spring lordless."

Knowing he wouldn't win on Night Court soil, Tamlin scoffed and headed for the door, not before stopping at your side and letting his gaze roam your figure, "They can't watch you forever. I'll see you soon, Flower."

Then he left.

And you stood standing in Feyre's arms pale and frozen, looking at the broken glass on the floor and shaking your head, "I have to go," you announced, peeling yourself out of Feyre's embrace and feeling like a completely awful friend to her, "I'm sorry."

"Y/N.."

You couldn't stick around and listen to her call your name, you couldn't stay there and witness Azriel looking at you like a stranger. So you ran. You ran all the way home, you didn't stop for a single moment until you closed the door behind you and slid down the wood, bursting into chest wrecking sobs.

If anyone would know who you were, it would be Lucien Vanserra, he was Tamlin's friend after all.

The red haired male found himself dragged before the Inner Circle by Elain, a thing he detested, he had just returned from the human realm and wanted nothing more than to be wrapped up with his mate, sitting in front of them was something he wanted to be rid of and fast.

"What do you know about Y/N? She came from the Spring Court," Lucien's eyes widened in saddening alarm at Feyre's question, he looked about the room as if you'd pop out from a corner at any given second.

"She's here?" Feyre nodded, "How is she?"

The question took them by surprise, and confirmed what they already knew, that you certainly we no double agent, but they had to know your story, it was a matter of protecting you, "She could be better. Tamlin was here."

Lucien's eyes darkened into molten lava pools and his nostrils flared, "Did he see her?" the silence confirmed his own query and he looked deflated, his shoulder fell and sadness floated over his face, enough sadness that Elain had moved to his side and wrapped his hand in her own.

"We need to know everything," Rhys ordered, moving his gaze to Azriel who was itching to leave the house and go to you, but even he had to know what had happened.

The Autumn male sighed, feeling conflicted, not wanting to tell your story for you but knowing he had no choice, "Y/N belongs to a very powerful Spring Court family, her father wanted a direct line to Tamlin so offered up his eldest daughter, Y/N, for marriage. Her father was a prick, no doubt still is. He sold Y/N to Tamlin like she was worth nothing more than what she could breed. She tried so hard to put off marrying him, she wanted a long engagement so that she could get to know Tamlin but everyone knew she just wanted more time to find a way out. Then the Tithe came and even I couldn't stop him from taking her into that cave," Lucien looked to Feyre who knew Tamlin all too well to know that what he was saying was nothing but the truth.

"Each year after that first Tithe, he sought her out against her will, you could hear her crying bouncing off of the walls. I couldn't watch it anymore so I helped her escape, I gave her enough money to be able to travel the continent and never heard from her again. I just did all I could to throw him off, to keep him away from her. Y/N was the happiest person in Spring, everyone loved her so much, and Tamlin ruined her."

"Seems like a pattern," Feyre cleared her throat and settled into Rhys' warmth that had wrapped around her like a blanket. She felt horrible, she thought she had it bad, but at least Tamlin never took her against her will like he had done to you repeatedly.

"Feyre I don't want to compare, but you have to understand that what he did to you was not nearly as bad as what he did to her. He took her light away, he forced her into a darkness I've never seen before or seen since, the neglection was sickening, she would cry for days on end, she'd mourn the life she dreamed of. It was unbearable."

A ghost of a smile appeared on his lips, "She made it here though, I knew she'd find where she belonged in the end."

"Why didn't she tell me? I would have understood."

Rhys shushed his mate, he knew how much Feyre loved you, they all did, "Sometimes you don't want to talk about what others made you do," his mind drifted and eyes glazed over as he remembered his own story for a moment, the painful memories tugging at his heartstrings.

Rhys knew how it felt to be used against your own will, he knew how it felt to lie there each night and feel like a worthless pawn in someone else's game. He knew how it felt to work yourself into exhaustion trying to forget the terrors others had willingly inflicted on you.

If anyone could truly understand you, then it would be him. And there was no way he was going to let you lock yourself away and perish with shame when you had a family and life awaiting you.

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roquebr · 1 year ago

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The Fury

Barcelona femeni x reader

Aitana Bonmáti x reader

Summary: When all seems lost, a turnaround can be more impressive.

The rocking of the bus gives me a slight feeling of relaxation, my headphones placed carelessly in my ears, with the sound at the highest volume, hoping to hide the prevailing noise of the place.

The youngest girls on the team are very excited about today's game, it's no surprise that we are heading towards the first leg of the Champions League semi-final, simply the biggest European championship. So it's not surprising when some of them are sitting on their benches with greater concentration than the other side, which is a mess.

Everyone has their own way of preparing, mine being to ignore everyone around me as much as possible until we get to the changing rooms, music being my escape point, I always turn to Brazilian music to be my company during these moments, it's a way of feel close to home.

— Meto o chapéu na cabeça ela perde a cabeça e me fala assim... – When the song approaches the chorus, I feel a nudge on my shoulders, I pause the song and look at the intruder who disturbed me and then I relax, yeah Alexia, she knows about my pre-game ritual and I know she wouldn't disturb me for nothing.

—Hey Ale, allright?

— Yes, sorry to bother you, but we've already arrived at the stadium and the girls are already coming down.

— I lost track, I'm going too, I'm just going to get my things — I give a small smile, thanking him for his kindness.

— I see you're a little out of tune, is everything okay? – He places one of his free hands on my shoulder, with the other holding his belongings. I don't know how she manages to balance everything like that, if it were me, my cell phone would definitely be broken on the floor by now.

— Yes, I'm just concentrating on the game, you know how it is, right?

— I understand, but if you need anything you can talk to me. – I don't answer, stopping myself from just returning a kind look.

We continued walking towards the changing rooms, greeting the workers as I passed.

I know that this nervousness is not just because of the game, but because of the desire to show more than my best on the field, having arrived at the club just under a year ago, coming straight as a standout on the Ferroviária, I knew that from the beginning I had to show more than I expected.

I've had a strong presence in many of the 37 unbeaten games played so far, I've been a regular starter, but apparently I'm not good enough to start today.

As soon as Jona announced who would start before we got on the bus, my spirits immediately dropped, I know he decided the lineup thinking about preserving some prominent athletes for possible future changes of keys, but that doesn't negate my feeling of incompetence to start on the bench.

We arrive at the locker room and I immediately head to my cubicle, my headphones that have been stored for a long time no longer deprive me of Rosalía's loud voice that emanates from the absurdly loud speaker in my ears.

I change calmly, but I decide not to wear socks or football boots for now, I'm going to interpret this as a protest for being on the bench today, a bit childish I know.

I sigh and lean my head against the wall, where my game t-shirt used to hang, I watch my happy teammates as they transform and sway to the beat of the music.

I saw my girlfriend of 1 year, we met in October 2022 at Ballon D'or, I went to the event as Marta's guest after telling her in a free conversation that I would like to have the experience of going.

We talked for just over a month and soon we were dating, excited, right, but the feeling was intense and it happened, at first it was difficult because of the distance because I was in Brazil and she was in Spain, but we got through it together, whenever I could I went to visit her. there. Unfortunately, she never managed to go to Brazil, but I will resolve that during our next “vacation”.

Jona arrives in the locker room and starts his usual motivational talk, honestly I don't feel like listening to anything, with my mind confused I just focus on going to the bench.

Sit next to Alexia with Lucy on the other side, the traditional song of the champions plays bringing a smile to my face, regardless of my wounded pride, every time this anthem plays I can't help but get emotional, it's a dream that becomes childhood reality.

The first half of the game was somewhat disappointing, Barça put pressure on Chelsea's marking but unfortunately the defense did not give in, in the 39th minute came the beginning of our fall, taking advantage of a passing error from Irene that gave Chelsea close possession of the ball. to the area, making a respectable exchange of passes until he found a partner in the area, he deceived Keira's marking and passed to Cuthbert who wasted no time in scoring. We came out at half-time with 1-0 to Chelsea.

The atmosphere in the dressing room is very different to when we arrived, the totally dead Barcelona vibe contradicts the emotion I normally feel, word after word, motivation after motivation, all falling on my deaf ears as each teammate seemed focused on acquiring each lyric. said by him.

With a wave of his hand, Jona takes me aside to talk.

— YN, where are your boots?

— It's in the bank, Jona.

He sighs lightly in annoyance, the stress in his shoulders is visible.

— Look, I know you're disappointed that I didn't start today, but please put your boots on, I'll be with you on the field in about 10 minutes.

— Great Jona, I'll put it on.

Returning to the second half, a little more excited, I ask one of the physiotherapists there to put a bandage on my ankle, Sophia is her name, as I injured my ankle during the game I always put a bandage on it to avoid future injuries.

After Sophia finishes, I put on my socks and football boots, I kiss each shin guard before putting them on.

The second half began, Barça had difficulty getting into the game, then a penalty was awarded in our favor, we celebrated along with the cheers of the fans, this would be our chance to continue in the game.

The referee goes to the Var and immediately cancels the penalty, apparently the referee interprets that Salma's offside hinders the defender, nonsense if I may say so.

At 63 minutes Jona makes 2 substitutions, bringing Alexia and Lucy. Ingrid and Ona sit next to me, respectively tired and disappointed with their performances, I give both thighs a comforting squeeze.

I wait anxiously at the edge of my bench for a while, waiting for the moment when Jona replaces me. In the 74th minute, when Ramirez, Chelsea's striker, missed the chance to expand, my heart almost exploded. Patri managed to disrupt her position well, although he still let her to finish the shot.

— Jonas!! – He doesn’t even turn around in recognition.

— Que saco mano. – I go down towards him who was on the side of the field. — Jona, am I going in now?

— Be patient, YN, go to warm up.

A frown appears on my face, but I do as I'm told, not before kicking the water bottle nearby. My companions give me sympathetic looks, which makes me more stressed.

At 78 minutes, the assistant coach says I'm ready and Jona calls me to the sidelines next to him.

— Listen to me, we need you now in this field, are you ready for this challenge. – She pauses only to give the numbers to the fourth referee who is preparing the replacement panel. — We need to decide this game at home, with our fans who came here to watch us play, with courage and love when we enter the field. I know you are ready for this challenge, show who you are and what you came for.

I can't find words, so I just listen, shaking my head with a determined look. I take the place of Mariona, who wishes me good luck, running to my position, passing my girlfriend, blinking and returning to focus on the game.

Time: 80m

In a quick run down the wing, Frido sends it to Caro who tries to finish, the goalkeeper saves but the rebound goes straight to my side, I don't miss the opportunity and send it into the goal. I see Salma grab the ball so we can restart the game, I run back to position, jumping and calling the fans to play together.

Time: 83m

Patri intercepts the ball in midfield, passes it to Aitana who dribbles the opponent, leaving her mistaken, I ask for the ball and soon receive it. I notice that the goalkeeper's left corner is free, I prepare my leg and take a strong low shot, I see the ball roll quickly as the goalkeeper tries to launch himself too late, then you see the net ripple. We changed the course of the game, but it's still not enough.

Time: 85m

Aitana is having an impressive run taking advantage of Chelsea's neglect, a defender in front of her, with options like me on the left and Caro on the right, with Salma right behind. Aita rolls the ball to me, I take a slight touch to the right and shoot with confidence, the ball takes a threatening curve and soon falls into the net, surprising the goalkeeper.

Now I allow myself to celebrate, I run close to the flag post and slide down on my knees, my teammates hugging me and pulling me everywhere, the euphoria was so much that it felt like we had won the Champions League right there. I felt like crying, I scored my first hat-trick in the Champions League

Time: 88m

We receive a free kick after the Chelsea player almost grabbed Aitana trying to take the ball away from her, Salma takes the free kick which hits Lucy's head, who aims the ball towards the goalkeeper's box. She came spinning through the air, landing perfectly at my feet, I beautifully pushed her towards the goal and fell into the hug. With every second that passed the crowd became louder and louder, if possible.

Time: 90m

The gas had not passed, it was getting stronger and stronger, now with a considerable advantage, we preferred to send the team back. Keeping score is crucial for the second leg in England. Although we are currently more focused on defense, that doesn't stop us from also attacking at every opportunity. The team's confidence increased and we played calmer, making more passes and remaining calm when under pressure.

Caro has the ball on the right wing, looks up and sees the perfect opportunity to cross.

Caro's always necessary crossing makes things easier for me, I wait for her to reach the right height before jumping and sending the bike, when I fall backwards onto the grass my pain is numbed by a very loud vibration coming from the stadium.

Barely having time for anything else, I run towards the small Chelsea fans present in the stadium, stop in front of them and place both hands on my waist, with an arrogant posture, soon my teammates come to me in pure euphoria. Many compliments reach my ears, I allow myself to embrace them as much as possible before we have to return to the starting position.

9 minutes of extra time were allowed, nothing else impressive happened during this period, the 3 characteristic whistles were heard. There were many celebrations after we greeted the rival team. I head towards the referee team who hands me the ball.

Jona hugs me congratulating me on a successful game, the team soon arrives and gives me the idea of throwing myself into the air, I try to run away but I'm not fast enough, after the desperate seconds pass I run to the fans, my spirits were high today.

I ask a member of the coaching staff to hold my ball for me, while I jump into the arms of the crowd, doing my best to sign and take as many photos with everyone as possible, the only limit being the barrier.

I feel an arm go around my waist as I sign a Mapí fan t-shirt. I look to the side and see that it is Aitana, who is already looking at me with her beautiful smile on her face, her bright eyes remind me of the constellations.

I can't help but smile with her, our passionate looks betrayed our enormous passion for each other, which doesn't go unnoticed by the public, to everyone's euphoria and my poor heart, she stands on tiptoe and gives a long kiss to the my lips. , fireworks light up in my belly.

Soon the photo of that moment would be published on many pages, one of them was the official Barça account, and certainly on many fan pages that would blow up my cell phone with notifications.

But I couldn't care less, I played an impressive game and had my girl in my arms, could I ask for more than that?.

!!The inspiration for the character to score 5 goals in 10 minutes came from Lewa, when he played for Bayern he did this feat, so I thought “why not put that in the fic?”!" ... sorry for any mistakes, english is not my main language

#barcelona femeni x reader #aitana bonmati x reader #barca femini x reader #woso x reader #woso fanfics #woso imagine #woman champions league #football #soccer

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gunsatthaphan · 6 months ago

Text

~ Monthly BL Breakdown: December 2024 ~

🎆 Happy New Year!!! 🎉

Hey everyone! This will be my last breakdown as I have decided to discontinue the tradition. Making compilation posts requires a lot of work and dedication and unfortunately the engagement is not big enough for me to have the motivation to keep going. Thank you to those who have liked and reblogged and said nice things, I appreciate that very much!! 🧡 I will continue to run my blog as usual so I will remain available for asks about anything (as long as they're nice) and I will continue to post updates here and there. Thank you 🧡

Disclaimer: ALL shows can be streamed here or here, as well as on Youtube and other platforms. For more info on where to watch what, check out this post!

As always feel free to add stuff! -> previous breakdowns

What came out this month? (green = seen/currently watching)

🌟 Addicted Heroin Special Episode - December 1st (Thailand)

🌟 Tokimeki Bomb - December 1st (Japan)

🌟 Hidden - December 3rd (Thailand)

🌟 You Want Some? - December 5th (South Korea)

🌟 Be Moon - December 6th (China)

🌟 Eyes on You - December 11th (Hong Kong)

🌟 ThamePo: Heart that Skips a Beat - December 13th (Thailand) ✅

🌟 The Renovation - December 14th (Thailand)

🌟 Only For Fans - December 15th (South Korea)

🌟 Eternal Butler - December 20th (Taiwan)

🌟 Gangster And His Boyfriend - December 21st (South Korea)

🌟 The Way Home - December 24th (China)

🌟 Sangmin Dinneaw - December 29th (Thailand)

Monthly Likes / Dislikes

❣️ - ø 👎🏻 - ø

New series & movie announcements

🎥 Lost on the River (starring JudoFluke) - Date TBA (Thailand)

🎥 I'm Not Wrong - Date TBA (South Korea)

🎥 Love Destiny from Hell - Date TBA (Thailand)

🎥 Concealed and Blended - Date TBA (Thailand)

🎥 City of the Sun - Date TBA (China)

🎥 Secret Relationship - Date TBA (South Korea)

🎥 Love and Punishment - Coming March 2025 (Taiwan)

🎥 Desire - Date TBA (China)

Other news from the BL world

❗️ The winners of GMMTV's BL contest Y-Find have been announced. A total of 4 submitted plots by Thai fans will be adapted into series. The winning titles are My Lovely Pet, Who Killed My Boo?, Lost Time and รักนี้พอดีเป็นของพระรอง. Further production steps have not been disclosed by the company.

❗️ The Japanese BL I Became the Lead in a BL Drama is getting a sequel. The title as well as a premiere date have not been announced.

❗️ The Japanese lgbt dating reality show The Boyfriend is getting a second season. Further details are unknown.

❗️ Former Be On Cloud actor Barcode Tinnasit has joined GMMTV.

❗️ In a public statement, the writer of the novel Pit Babe, which was adapted into a series in 2023, announced that they have removed the Omegaverse elements from the sequel as it no longer complies with their beliefs and principles. These changes will be carried into the upcoming series adaption by Change 2561 in 2025.

❗️ The yearly Y Entertainment Awards were held on December 1st. The following BL actors/productions won:

Last Twilight: Best BL of the Year

Aof Noppharnach: Best BL director of the Year

Pooh Krittin: BL Prince of the Year

Pit Babe: Best Production of the Year

"Re-Move On" by GeminiFourth: Best OST of the Year (My Love Mixup)

Up Poompat: Best BL Lead Actor of the Year

❗️ WETV released their 2025 lineup on December 5th. The following BL productions were announced:

Shine (sequel to ManSuang, starring Mile P. and Apo N.)

Love of Silom (starring Up P. and Poom P.)

Top Form (adaption of the manga Dakaichi, starring Smart C. and Boom R.)

Knock Out (starring Gunner N. and Nice B.)

Me and Who (collaboration with Domundi, starring Big T. and Park A.)

Upcoming series & movies for January:

👉🏻 The Boy Next World - January 5th (Thailand)

👉🏻 Ossan's Love Thailand - January 6th (Thailand)

👉🏻 When It Rains It Pours - January 9th (Japan)

👉🏻 Idolfactory 2025 lineup event - January 12th (Thailand)

👉🏻 Impression of Youth - January 15th (Taiwan)

#doreens monthly bl breakdown #thai bl #bl drama #upcoming bl #update #bl news #thank you for supporting my breakdowns! 🧡#i had fun with them #happy new year!!! wishing everyone love and happiness and health!!

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notanactressyayy · 1 year ago

Note

Podrías hacerme este pedido: qué pasa con ella? Con Natasha, tu novia. Luego del Blip, se la paso distante -sin esa dulzura que mostraba contigo- o simplemente sin cumplir su papel de novia. Se la pasaba en su oficina, con la mirada perdida y en sus pensamientos - nunca te hablo de eso.

Podrías agregar que cambió cosas en su rutina, como por ej: antes la escuchabas en llamadas con los restantes vengadores, pero eso ya no pasa o la extrañas en tus sábanas - ahora se la pasa despierta.

Por último, el complejo, el cual previamente llamaron hogar y dónde intercambiaban risas o amor mutuo, paso a ser un espacio silencioso, tal vez sombrío, sin amor.

༉‧₊˚. 𝐥𝐨𝐯𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐬𝐢𝐥𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐥𝐲

pairing . Natasha Romanoff x reader

summary . when Natasha met you, you brought the side of her she didn't know before — the happy, gentle, soft side. when something major happens, will she continue to be the girlfriend you deserve? will she allow her feelings and past to take you away from her?

warnings . the blip events, brief descriptions of Nat's past, cursing, yelling, breaking down, breaking up (?), angst.

notes . english is not my first language (🇧🇷) so i apologize for any spelling errors. this fic here is for my big sister @scarjosii22 who couldn't finish her story and asked me to do it for her.

divider credits: @sister-lucifer @i-mmaculatus

part two: loving you from afar (somewhere)

it was another day in which you stared at yourself in the mirror, after brushing your teeth, showering and braiding your hair before sleep — something she used to do. yeah, the dark circles under your eyes certainly grew bigger, that was for sure. a tsk comes out of your lips as you walk out of the bathroom, the only sound echoing through the pavement being your heavy steps.

perhaps you did it on purpose. a little sound was certainly missing in that place.

it had been five years, five years since she started blaming herself for not managing to stop Thanos — Natasha Romanoff, the only one with no superpowers, that had to rely only on her weapons and strength, blamed herself. you tried to talk to her about this, you had multiple conversations, and yet they seemed pointless. that woman was so goddamn stubborn, and never listened to you.

at some point, you'd certainly grow tired of that. and that point had co—

no, it didn't. you told yourself everyday you'd never give up on your relationship. you tried to remember the reason you fell in love with her over and over, to see if that would keep you grounded.

she protected me, she saved me, she showed me i could trust her, she showed me i was enough for her.

it was what she used to tell you, everyday, basically. when you got insecure, about the fact she was powerful and good at so many things, she reassured you you were the best thing that has ever happened to her. that you were the one that saved her. the light on her life.

maybe's just the fact that Natasha never had a relationship before you, so she didn't really know how it was to love and be loved back, or... she just didn't have any experience. but she did. she's a spy, and if there was an Avenger that knew about feelings it was her. you knew for a fact she was aware of how neglected you were becoming in your relationship, but for some reason she chose not to do anything about it.

you walked past the main gate — unfortunately, you had to pass through her office to get to your room — to see her eyes focused on the screen computer. again. watching the faces of the people who disappeared with the blip. you shook your head, sighing in frustration and pulling the computer's wire out of the socket. Natasha frowned, and the words that came out of her mouth cut deep.

"what's wrong with you!?"

"what's wrong with me?" you scoff back. "you're treating me as if i were some stranger, Natasha. i'm your partner. do you recall that?"

she completely ignores everything you say and narrow her eyes at you. she abruptly stands up from her chair and towers you. "i'm working. can't you fucking see that?"

your eyes widen in surprise and honestly, annoyance. it wasn't the first time you confronted her on the week and it wasn't gonna be the last either. "you saw those goddamn slides for a thousand times already, and literally! do you think staring at them will bring them back? keep dreaming, then,"

that statement intrigued her. she took a step back, wrapping her arms around herself, gulping audibly. her only answer was to turn the computer on again and turn her back on you.

"good night, Natasha." you tell her, not realizing the one tear rolling down your face. "i'm going to sleep now."

and with that, you took the elevator to the dormitories floor and entered your shared room with her, practically throwing your slippers away and tucking yourself under the covers, the cold, empty sheets.

you missed her there. god, you did. your body subconsciously snuggled up against the blanket as you grabbed the pillow that once belonged to to her, and held it tightly. and you just, cried.

༉‧₊˚. ★

Natasha didn't sleep, those weren't news. she stayed the night on the sofa of her office, staring at the big glass window there. the colour pallette of the garden outside reminded her of herself. dark green, grey, navy blue, and black. the nature was already dead because no one bothered to go outside and take care of the plants.

she couldn't brush away the thought of the similarity between that and your situation with her. you were drowning, and she wasn't even trying to pull you out.

the compound was empty. no more jokes. no more laughter. no more the Avengers and certainly no more Natasha. the russian woman thought of that as a punishment for her uselessness. she was purposefully dragging herself away from you, so with that you'd probably find another partner, someone else who wasn't broken like her, that could give you the love you so desperately needed. or, a tiny, tiny piece of her wanted someone to suffer like her, to feel everything she felt. but that wasn't something she was going to admit. was it?

so she just laid back against the backrest and stared at the ceiling, trying to calm down her racing thoughts but failing.

some of the superheroes tried to get in touch with her by the communication channels, but she wasn't accepting the calls. she'd given up on leading the Avengers. it wasn't her job anyway.

her best friend, Clint, was out there killing people like she once did. Steve had a support group for the people who didn't snap, but she thought it was bullshit to join. so she lived within the four walls of the office, trapped, unable to get out.

༉‧₊˚. ★

the saliva you swallowed dragged across your sore throat, making you hiss out of pain. this morning, you were trying— no, you were determined to give yourself a good time, regardless of that sounding insane on the current circumstances. a girlfriend who didn't love you anymore and half of the world gone? what a great way of living.

you searched inside the pantry for the strawberry tea and made yourself a cup, heating it on the microwave. you leaned against the counter and waited for it to get ready. while waiting, you took a moment to glance around. you smiled when your eyes landed on a specific plushie resting on a corner. a turtle plushie you and Natasha used to take care of together.

when the microwave clicked, you grabbed the tea and took a sip of it, the strawberry flavor, along of the warmth of it were a momentary relief, for all the mess going on there. speaking of mess, it was the definition of the person who had just walked in the kitchen.

"good morning, Nat," you murmur, attempting to be friendly. "i made myself some tea. would you like so—"

"just here to get some aspirin." she quickly, roughly cuts you off, opening the cabinet and searching through it. instead of taking one, she opened the bottle and turned it on her mouth, taking all the pills at once.

your eyes widened. what the hell was she doing? trying to dope herself and not even hiding? your feet moved faster than you as you grabbed her chin with one hand, as your other one practically punched her on the back, making her cough all the pills out.

instead of speaking, you take a moment to process what just happened. you frustratedly run your fingers through your hair, pacing around the kitchen. "look. if you don't want to have a good day, that's fine by me. but if you're not giving me a good day, at least allow me to have it myself. please?"

"i'm minding my business," she coughs out, dull eyes looking into yours. "you don't have to get in my way."

"you literally almost killed yourself in front of me!" you snap, a sudden rush of anger washing over you. "what the fuck do you expect me to do in a situation like that, huh? do you want me to sit here and enjoy the freaking view, to watch you as you slip away from me!?''

Natasha's body involuntarily shake as you yell. she didn't like yelling. it was what triggered the tears pooling on the corners of her eyes.

"tell me, Natasha. what do i have to do for Thanos to snap me away too!?" you scoff and throw the porcelain cup on the skin, the sound of the shards shattering filling the place. "because i really wish i disappeared too. would you like that?"

you breath heavily after the outburst, eyes watching as her body sunk down to the floor. her eyes were wide in fear and shock. it wasn't a pleasant view. you gulp and walk towards her. "i'm sorr—"

"get away!" she yells back, stumbling backwards as if you were some monster. "leave me fucking alone!"

"Natasha, i don't wanna hurt you—" you try again, frowning and trying to reach out for her.

loud sobs escapes the redhead, and she doesn't try to suppress them. she body is a mess autopilot working and everything is way too confusing for you to understand. she buries her face in her hands and refuses your comfort. so you sit on the floor as well, leaning against the cold wall but keeping a good distance between you two — hearing her cries.

༉‧₊˚. ★

the tension was palpable between the two of you. you were way too tired to have another pointless conversation with her, so you stayed quiet. it was already night again, 6pm precisely, and neither of you had left the kitchen. when you looked to the side, you saw Natasha's eyes still open. she was still listening.

"i'm still here," you begin, lifting your hand up and staring at the ring on your finger. "loving you silently."

Natasha's eyes barely flicker with the sound of your gentle voice. but she stays quiet.

"i still imagine myself getting hugged by you. having your kisses. having your body close. having you close. i miss all of that. i miss when you listened to me," you chuckle humorlessly, grabbing a shard of porcelain and fidgeting with it. "i miss my Natasha."

"stop," she quietly pleads, squeezing her eyes shut. "please stop."

"you're so selfish. you became so selfish." you sigh, weakly standing up. you open the sink faucet and throw a little bit of fresh water on your face. "trying to protect yourself, trying not to face the truth. you don't even think about me anymore."

when she doesn't speak, you continue.

"i could help. i helped you before, didn't i? i helped you with everything you ever asked me for. i helped here, your team, because i'm good at what i do. that's why Tony hired me. because i was good for all of you. i got a room in the Avengers Compound. but this?" you gesture around. you raise your voice again, but not yelling — just as if you wanted somewhere to hear. "this seems like a haunted house! where's all the people in here!?"

Natasha stands up, her red baggy eyes looking into yours as she pointed a finger at you. "it's not gonna change. there's no point in trying to."

"really? you don't say," you laugh dryly and shrug your shoulders. "i realized that a long time ago."

you take a deep breath, shaking your head. you had no tears left to cry, really. you shed so much for her, and for everything around you. the next thing you did surprised Natasha — but not as much as she thought it would.

you carefully slip the ring out of your finger and placed it on her hand, folding her fingers around it. your lips pressed on a thin line. "i love you, Natasha. i always will."

she clears her throat, feeling her eyes begin to burn again.

"when you become the Natasha i love again, please let me know."

part two: loving you from afar (somewhere)

(aí está, @scarjosii22. espero que você goste dessa, e espero que você pegue as referências do chá, e da tartaruga 🐢🍓)

#natasha marvel #natasha romanoff imagine #natasha romanoff x reader #natasha romanoff x you #natasha x reader #natasha romanoff #natasha romanoff fluff #natasha romanov #notanactressyayy #marvel incorrect quotes #natasha romanoff smut #g!p natasha romanoff #natasha x y/n #natasha x you #angst #ask #anon ask #thanks anon!#🐢 anon

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fanfictiongirlie · 8 months ago

Text

A Song of Sun and Snow - Chapter Five

Click here for Masterlist

Pairings: Robb Stark x Baratheon Reader

Description: You and Robb Stark hated one another. Always had, always will. As the oldest daughter of Robert Baratheon, you had been engaged to Robb for as long as you could remember. He however had always thought of you as a southern bratty princess, and you had thought him as a arrogant jerk. You had reached your 18th name day a few months ago, and in a few weeks you'd be travelling to Winterfell to marry him.

Rating: Explicit (Eventually)

Words: 3,186

P.s: Just something I couldn't get out of my head. No use of Y/N. Only description of 'reader given: the fact that she doesn't look like Joff, Myrcella and Tommen (It's hinted she truly is Robert and Cersei's child) Not much though. Like one line. I wrote this in a different style to my usual style, using 2nd person. Hope it's okay. P.s there will be pregnancy in this, the 'reader' wants to have children. Also the ages are completely different in this fic then they are in the show/book.

Finally at the first stop towards your journey to Winterfell, You stepped out of the carriage, and followed the rest of the Starks into the small inn. Robb followed closely behind. The first thing you all did was sit at a large table and enjoy a nice hot meal.

Robb watched you the entire time, he couldn't stop thinking about the way he'd made you come, thinking about how you seemed so desperate and needy for his touch. How he'd been able to break you even for just a little bit and how you were still acting so defiant towards him despite it all.

You ate your meal quietly, chatting every now and again to Lady Stark or Robb's little siblings. Robb tried to participate in your conversations but his mind was elsewhere. His mind continued to drift to you, thinking over how you sounded in that carriage.

The inn was nice enough, it wasn't the fanciest of places you had been in before, but then again you were a princess who grew up in a large castle, nothing would be as fancy. The people who worked there were nice enough, and after a good night's sleep, you were back in that damn carriged, though this time, Robb's little sister Sansa had wanted to sit with you both. Robb wanted to argue, but you had given permission before he could even speak. Though it was probably best, otherwise he knew he'd do absolutely unspeakable things to you in the carriage.

"Will I be able to help you with your hair for the wedding?" Sansa asks, even at ten she was obsessed with everything to do with weddings, boys, looking pretty.

"Of course little one" You answer, smiling softly. The two of you spoke more of the wedding, and you found yourself a little excited. For the wedding part, not the Robb part...right?

Robb smiled as he listened to the two of you chat. It was actually kind of cute, to see how you were with Sansa, he thought. He thought you were so sweet and patient with her. It was yet another side to you, the warm, caring princess who was so good with children. Sansa asked so many questions, all of which you were happy to answer. Until one question that left you flushing red.

"What happens after you wedding? Mother won't tell me"

You choked on air slightly as the words left her lips. That little question caught both you and Robb by surprise.

"Uhh unfortunately that isn't something we can tell you, sweet Sansa" You spoke carefully "Perhaps your brother can tell you"

Robb had to laugh out loud at that, covering his mouth in an attempt to stifle the sound. He couldn't help himself, the idea of Sansa trying to ask him about wedding night activities and what happens between bride and groom was too hilarious to him. You smiled at Robb as Sansa looked at Robb expectantly.

"Uhh what exactly do you mean, Sansa?" Robb asks her.

"What happens after you wed?" She asks again.

Robb had started to feel a little flustered now, having both Sansa and your eyes on him. Sansa's face was completely innocent, and she looked so hopeful for an answer. He didn't exactly know how to explain this to her, but he attempted to do so anyway.

"Uh, well...usually the bride and groom do something to celebrate the wedding in their room, alone"

You smirked at him, enjoying this thoroughly. "Perhaps you can tell me about the dress you'll wear" You say smiling sweetly to Sansa, deciding to save Robb from this conversations. Robb couldn't help but let out a soft sigh of relief, secretly grateful that you'd change the subject, saving him from having to explain any further to Sansa.

The day carried on, the journey had been pretty uneventful so far. Sitting alone with Robb and Sansa had been pretty interesting. Spending time with them both had actually been fun. But you were thankful when you had finally reached the second inn for the night. The carriage had made your body ache and you needed a soft bed to lie in.

When in the inn you walked to your room and flopped down on the bed, lying on the end stretching out. You'd only been in your room for a few minutes when there was a soft knock at your door. You knew exactly who it was.

"Yes?" You called out. Robb pushed the door open and walked into your room, shutting the door behind him. He looked at you, laying on the bed, how soft your body looked, how inviting...

"Stark!" You say in utter surprise, not expecting him to actually walk into your room. He chuckled softly and walked over to the bed, sitting on the edge next to your lying figure. He looked down at you, stretched out in front of him. Gods, you looked so good like this....he could feel the want stirring within him....

"Did I scare you princess?"

"You shouldn't be in my room..."You say quietly. He smirked leaning closer to you, moving so his upper body almost hovered over your body.

"And yet, here I am..."

"You really don't care for rules, do you?" You ask, laughing softly. It felt weird to laugh in his presents, but you kinda liked it.

Robb chuckled...Rules? There were so many rules and he didn't care for any of them. Not when you were right here, underneath him, the way you should be. The defiant look in your eyes only fueled his urge more, he knew deep down you wanted him and as bad as he wanted you. Your eyes betrayed you.

"No, princess, I don't care for rules"

"I've noticed" You say quietly. You knew you should sit up, get off the bed and demand he leaves your room, but you didn't. "I'm exhausted, what is it?"

"I want you, princess" He whispers, his face lowered towards yours.

"You marry me in a few weeks, you get me then" You answer, wanting to lean up, press your lips to his. But you didn't.

"Ah...but my lovely, sweet princess..." He suddenly lowers himself even closer to you, his breath touched your lips "I want you now"

"We can't" You whisper. He groaned at your words, and the tone of your voice. That beautiful whisper of yours. Gods, you were driving him crazy, and you weren't even doing anything. He wanted you now, wanted to feel your body against his, hear all the pretty sounds he could make you make again...

"And why can't we, princess?"

"You know why" You whisper wanting so bad to touch him. Let him touch you again.

"Who cares if it's scandalous?"

"I am a princess, I will not have rumours of doing such things before I am married" You answer a little more forceful. The inn was too busy, too many possible people to hear you to such things with him.

"You're driving me insane" He mutters, closing his eyes and lifting up from you, he sits at the end of the bed with his elbows on his knees and his hands on his head.

"Why the sudden urge to touch me? What happened to us hating one another?" You ask quietly, sitting up and matching his pose.

Robb laughed at that, you were absolutely right. What had happened to him? Why did he suddenly want you so badly, when only a few days ago all he wanted was to run away and not marry you. He wasn't even sure himself, but the fact remained that all he wanted right now was you, to feel your body against his, to feel you beneath him and hear the pretty sounds you made when he touched you...

"I don't know princess, I'm not sure what happened. But I don't care about hating you anymore" He finally admitted out loud.

"You don't?" You whisper, not believing his words. He shook his head, he really couldn't care about hating you anymore.

"No, I don't care about hating you. I just want you"

"I...I don't want to hate you anymore" You whisper, looking up at him. His blue eyes looking into yours. Robb leaned a little closer to you.

"Good, because I don't want to hate you anymore, either, princess"

"Maybe...we could try and be friends...until our wedding in a few weeks time?" You ask slowly.

"Ah...friends, huh?"

"Yeah...maybe you can not be a dick for once" You say smiling.

"I suppose I could be a little nicer"

"That's all I ask" You say softly. He chuckled again, the urge to pull you into his lap was intense. But he wouldn't.

"And you'll be nice in return?" He asks, his eyes on you.

"I can definitely try"

"That'll do, princess" He answers, a soft smile on his lips. You felt your lips smile as he did.

"Right...well you better be off to your room" You say carefully, trying not to sound too harsh in your tone. Robb chuckled again, knowing he should listen to your words. But he didn't want to leave. You were sitting right here, looking so damn good....

"You're really going to make me leave?"

"You want your family to find you in my room?" You ask, Lord and Lady Stark would berate him if they found him in here, and as much as you'd like to see that, it wouldn't be right.

"Damn it, you're right" He groaned.

"Goodnight Star...Robb" You say smiling, his smile widen, he really liked his name on your lips.

"Goodnight princess" He says before leaving you to your room.

⋆⁺｡˚⋆˙‧₊☾ ◯ ☽₊‧˙⋆˚｡⁺⋆

The remainder of the journey to Winterfell took a few more weeks, and was more enjoyable now you and Robb decided you were going to try and be friends. Being able to talk to one another without being hateful and defiant towards each other all the time was a pleasant change...though it was a little bit torturous having to act as friends when you both wanted to jump each other's bones.

You were relieved when the carriages stopped in Winterfell. You were exhausted and were ready for a long hot bath and a lie in your bed.

"So this is Winterfell?" You say as you step out of your carriage, you take hold of Robb's hand and he helps you climb out. Robb smiled as he watched you look around, the courtyard before the castle was cold, and busy, the people of Winterfell stood around watching Robb's new soon to be wife, you smiled and waved as you saw the people. It made you uncomfortable having so many eyes on you, but as a princess, you were used to it.

"Welcome to Winterfell, princess" Robb said to you, his hand still on yours by your side.

"Thank you, Robb" You smile softly, you shivered slightly, not used to the cold air on your skin, but it wasn't nearly as bad as you imagined it to be.

"Come, let's get you settled" Robb said leading you by his hand through the courtyard, the younger of the Stark siblings were running ahead to get into the castle, whilst Lord Stark and Lady Stark slowly wandered behind, speaking to various people.

"Thank you" You say smiling up at him "I'm ready for a long bath"

Robb chuckled lightly, he imagined you laying in the tub, all relaxed. Not that he had any idea what you'd look like laying back in the tub just yet, but he damn sure wanted to find out soon...

"Your new handmaidens should be preparing a bath for you right now, princess" He said.

"Oh wonderful...." You beamed at him. Robb showed you around the castle first, showing you the main areas, including the library, you were most excited to spend time in there. And finally when you had seen most of the castle, the important parts he showed you to your room, it was your temporary room, until you were wed to him.

"Thank you Robb, I'll see you at dinner" You smile at him as you both stood outside your room's door. Robb was feeling reluctant to part with you, he needed to find something to keep himself occupied for the next few hours between now and when it was time for dinner, otherwise he'd probably go insane with the urge to go to your room and see you again, to spend more time with you....

"Okay, see you at dinner, princess. Have a nice bath"

"I will" You say, smiling up at him fondly. You walked into your room, it was decent enough, a little darker than you were used to. Your handmaidens greeted you with a simple bow and showed you to your bath, they helped you undress and you stepped into the hot water, you sighed happily as you settled, you had not wanted to get your hair wet so whilst you soaked in the lavender scented water you had your handmaids do your hair, they were careful and left your hair mostly loose with a few plaits.

Once the water started to become colder you stepped out, allowing your handmaids to dry you and help you dress in one of your new dresses, better suited for the cold of Winterfell. It was a deep purple dress that covered your arms completely which you were grateful for. Once done you had a servant show you the way to the feast hall, and once there you found all the Stark's sitting around the table.

It was a smaller table than the one in Kingslanding, it was more intimate, more...family like.

Robb looked up as you entered the room, his cool demeanor went out the window as he saw you enter. You looked beautiful, the deep purple of your dress making you look...so perfect. He then stood and walked over to you, meeting you mid room, he took your hand in his and kisses your knuckles, he lead you towards the table and pulled out the chair in between his spot and next to his mother.

You waited whilst Lord Stark spoke to you, welcoming you to Winterfell formally, and then the meal was served. Robb watched you idly as you began to eat, his thoughts consumed by you. You were so close to him, the faint scent of your skin driving him crazy, the way your dress hugged your body so perfectly...He was getting to be more and more tempted to just forget his promise to you, to stop acting like a good boy and take you right there on the table....

"Robb?" You say again, his eyes were on you, but he hadn't responded the first time you called his name.

He snapped out of his thoughts as he heard you speak, he looked at you with a startled expression.

"Yes, princess?"

"Didn't you hear what your mother asked?" You asked him, giggling softly.

He blinked, not having heard any question from you or his mother. He'd been too distracted in his daydream to hear or notice anything at all.

"Ah...no. Sorry mother, I didn't hear...Could you repeat the questions?" Robb speaks, an awkward smile on his lips.

"I thought tomorrow you could take the princess for a ride through the woods, she says she'd like to explore Winterfell before the winter comes" Lady Stark repeated herself.

Robb blinked, surprised by his mother's words. A simple ride through the woods...It was far too tempting to get you all alone, with no one around, nothing separating you from him in the thick, cold woods...but he knew he had to say yes....

"Ah...Yes, I can take her riding, mother, what a lovely idea" Robb smiled, taking a large gulp of his ale.

"Oh really? Thank you Robb, I'd truly love that" You exclaimed excitedly, your horse had come with you on the journey and it had been weeks since your last ride. Robb couldn't help the goofy smile that was forming on his face. Gods, he couldn't wait to have you all alone in the woods, with all that privacy and nowhere for anyone to see you, no one to stop or prevent him if he just took you right there in the woods...Gods...

"Robb?" You say, seeing he was daydreaming again.

"Ah..yes princess? Sorry, was I staring?" He asks, he definitely was, that purple dress on you, your perfect hair, your golden skin in the harsh white of Winterfell, it was too much for him, he was overwhelmed with your beauty.

"Yes.."You answer with a small giggle "But I asked you a question, did you hear me?"

Dammit...He thought, he needed to screw his head back on, getting so easily distracted. He was the future Lord of Winterfell, he couldn't let himself get so distracted by his future wife.

"No, I'm sorry, could you repeat it?" He asks a little sheepishly.

"Would you be kind enough to walk me back to my room? I'm exhausted after the long journey here" You ask again.

"Yes, of course princess, I'd love too" He grins, standing up. He watched as you stood and smooth out your dress and then you held your hand out, taking his arm. You say goodnight to his parents and family and then he starts leading you from the room. You were so tired, struggling to even keep your eyes open now, luckily Robb's arm was keeping you steady as you walked.

A small part of you wanted to push him against the wall, press your lips against his. As you walked through the halls, he didn't same much, just like dinner, he barely spoke to you. It made your brows furrow, and finally when you reached your bedroom door, you stopped walking and stood directly in front of him.

"Have I done something to upset you?" You ask, a small pang of panic surging through your heart.

Robb looked down at you confused, he then realised how quiet he had truly been this evening.

"No princess...No you haven't done anything wrong"

"Are you sure....Because since we've been in Winterfell, you've barely said a word to me" You say, you didn't want to sound pathetic but you couldn't help yourself. Those last few weeks of the journey were wonderful, you and Robb spoke about everything, got so much closer.

"I promise, you haven't upset me, I've just....I've had a lot on my mind" He tries to explain.

"Oh...right..well if you're sure, thank you for walking me to my room, Robb" You say quietly as you reach up on your tiptoes to press a gentle kiss to his cheek.

"You're welcome princess, get a good night's rest, okay?"

"Of course, goodnight" You say and then you walk into your room. Robb stood there for a moment, watching as you disappeared into your room. It took every ounce of his strength not to follow you inside and do terrible, shameful things to you right there and then. But he knew he had to control himself. And the thought of taking you out riding in the woods tomorrow...Now that would be a real challenge to control himself.

"Goodnight, my princess"

Taglist:

@quinquinquincy @whatelsecouldgowrong @rheanyraaaa

#fluff #robb stark imagine #robb stark x reader #robb stark smut #robb stark fanfiction #game of thrones fanfiction #game of thrones x reader

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romana-after-dark · 6 months ago

Text

Our Gentle Sins: Part 13

Thank you so so so much to @plasticbabies for making this beautiful header!!!! we finally have a good one!

Dark!Logan Howlett x fem!reader

Series Masterlist : Main Masterlist : Logan Masterlist

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Chapter summary: Past. Dolly is a part of a family. Present. Seeing Stevie

Warnings: This fic features non con, pregnancy, and themes of religious trauma. I will not be saying everything that happens to warm you, by clicking read more you are prepared for extremely dark themes and that you at 18+. You are responsible for your own media consumption.

a/n: PAST is a short chapter. the floor of the next few chapters is.... bad?? so im trying to chop it all up the way its best but its so hard trying ot match themes up with the before and after ;-; so im sorry. I feel like this chapter was boring.

Before

You tried, he really fucking tried to go back to normal after that, but ever since kissing you, feeling you body… things became more charged than normal.

You sat closer to him now, his body warm and inviting and buzzing with energy with everyone piling into the media room to watch a movie. Earlier today, Remy came into your room while you taught, trying to rally everyone together for a movie night.

You hear the door creek and glance over, smiling when you see Remy’s black and red eyes popping through the cracked door. Waving him in, you continue with the lesson. At 6’1 but not built too wide, Remy would not be out of place in your height school class seats…

Unfortunately, he was sitting in on your small elementary class.

Most mutations manifest with puberty, but some, especially second generation mutants, have the x gene activated much earlier. Your class was small, small enough you usually had to figure out how to teach content at 3 different grades at the same time… You couldn’t have a whole class just for the one 1st grader. When Remy came in, you were getting ready to read a book. You explained that each of the grades would have an assignment based off the book, and what each grade should be thinking about during the book, but to try and concentrate on the story first and foremost.

“I’ll be doing a think-aloud, so I will be modeling to you how readers think through books as we go.” You don’t have any degree, but you've been doing research on how to be an effective teacher.

Remy listened intently, looking like he’s about to REALLY enjoy the story, but you have some mercy. His legs look like they are losing circulation.

“Okay friends, how about we read the book on the carpet.” The kids erupted into cheers. “IF we can show Mr. LeBeau out best quiet feed and listening ears, okay?”

It was not very quiet, but they didn’t run.

“Mr. Lobo!” Said Micheal, not watching where he was going. “Are you and Miss Palmer in wuv?”

Remy bursts out in laughter, while your face burns red, quickly apologizing to Remy and trying to quell the kids.

“No!” Another kid, Katy, piped up. “She loves Mr. Howlett!”

Remy was no help, your handful of students arguing that you were in love with “Mr. LeBeau”, “Mr. Howlett”, “Mr. Summers” and even one kid asked about “Miss Grey”, which felt like the start of a very convoluted love… square?

“1, 2, 3, eyes on me!”

The children chimed back. “1, 2, eyes on you.”

“Okayyyy” You cleared your throat. “You guys don’t need to worry about who loves who. Me and Mr. LeBeau are just friends, and he is going to model good listening for me.”

30 minutes later, Remy did not model good listening, but he did at least help the younger kids with their assignment, so there was that.

“You’re a pain, you know that?” You tidy up before heading to the high school English room. This room was used for most subjects so the elementary school so most of your kids just stayed in the room coloring or reading or talking.

“A pain in your ass?” He whispered, and you gasped in response, smacking him with crumple cardboard paper.

“Hey! I whispered!” But he stopped swearing. “I wanna have a movie night with all of us, are you in?”

As much fun as it sounded, big groups of friends still made you nervous. Remy was friends with everyone, and although no one had treated you badly, there were people you knew still thought you were weird. They weren’t wrong. Moreso, it was hard with a large group of people who all were friends together. Then there was you. Last week's dance was enough for a little while. “Whose all coming?”

“Well, Logan of course, but I think he’s assuming you’ll be there.” He answered, and smirked at your little smile. “Kurt and Ororo said yes, Hank said maybe, you know how he gets caught up in his work, and I’m gonna invite Scott and Jean after you tell me yes because you love me so much????”

Your head sank a little at that. You liked Scott a lot, and Jean was always kind to you. You had no reason to dislike them…

“I don’t… I don’t think I can make it. Papers to grade and all that…”

Remy’s face crumbled. “Why? What? Too many people? I’ll uninvite everyone!! I’ll grade all the papers! Pistache, you’re the one I actually want there!”

You don’t know what to do with that. You knew Remy loved you, and that he was your good friend, but you weren’t used to someone choosing you first.

“It’s just… Well, don’t uninvite people, that’s crazy.”

“But I want you to come! What is it?”

He was too loud, some of the kids were trying to eavesdrop (nosy little things. You loved ‘em.) so you pull him off to the side, talking quieter.

“It’s just… Scott…”

Remy frowned at that, a little concern on his face. “What, has he given you problems? I thought he’d be understanding, knowing he knows what you-” But then he stops himself.

You almost missed it. Pinching your brows, you shake your head, “N-no, Remy, he’s fine- he- it’s Logan and Scott, Remy, come on. The fight?”

He relaxed. “Oh. Well, aren’t they over it?”

Over it? You don’t think they’d ever be over it. There was never friendship, never something to rebuild, only jealousy, anger, and a little bit of attempted murder.

You sigh, pinching your brow. “Remy. Logan tried to kill him. Scott keeps accusing him of abusing me. Logan slept with his wife. Scott accused him of m-o-l-e-s-t-i-n-g Rogue”

“Wait, what?”

“I can’t expect them to get along. And if Jean’s in the mix I- Remy, why would you want to invite all three of them?? Are you trying to start another fight?” The tone was harsher than you wanted it to be, but you’d had an intense week, and he gave you a piece of information you weren’t sure what to do with.

Your friend in front of you completely deflated, his normally happy face falling and his red eyes looking down. “Yeah, you’re right… I didn't think it through…”

You instantly felt bad. How could you be so mean to Remy? Sweet, sweet Remy? Remy who’d been there for you though it all. “I know. You’re friends with everyone, so you want everyone to be friends. I get it. I’m sorry.”

Remy gives you a small smile, seemingly recovered. “It’s alright, Pistache. What if I just don’t tell Scott and Jean? Or we could just watch something together? I uh… I heard from Rogue today. Got a letter and it… wasn’t very long, is all. Bit worried she’s forgotten about me in her grand adventures.” He gives a little laugh, but it’s nervous.

You consider the people coming, and decide it’s a small enough group. And Logan will be there, so you won’t be alone.

“Yeah, the movie sounds fun. Thanks for inviting me, Remy.”

You leaned against Logan, snuggled up to him comfortably as everyone found their spots. Kurt poofs in front of the large TV, see’s you in Logan’s arms, and his yellow eyes light up. “YAYYYYYY! Darauf habe ich gewartet!!” He teleports to you and Logan, squeezing both your cheek, poofing onto Logans shoulders to hug his whole head, then to behind the couch where he gave you a hug that clearly respected your personal space stuff.

“What are you on about, elf?” Logan pretends to be grumpy, but other than Wade, Kurt is his best friend.

He’s standing in front of you two again, grinning wildly and you can see his sharp teeth. “You two!” He gestures. “I’ve been knowing something is going on between you! Liebe, nein? I’m so happy it had finale happened!”

Morph threw a popcorn kernel at him. “Nothings happened yet. They are in denial.”

“We’re not in denial!” Logan barks, but he’s blushing. “We’re just…” he looks at you. “Taking it slow…”

“Oh.” Kurt’s shoulders drop. “Then… wat eez all dis?” He gestures to Logan’s arm around your shoulder.

You giggle. “Well, like he said, we’re not in denial.”

Kurt observes you for a second. “Mph. Well, dis eez… embarrassing for me, ja?”

You were about to protest when when Remy throw a pillow at him, yelling something about sitting down and shutting up. Kurt BAMF’d away, and reappeared on the armrest next to Logan.

“Dis guy.” Kurt gestures to Remy, whispering a little too loud. “Get’s broken up with vone time and he’s a mess.” He shimmers down between the arm rest and Logan, forcing the wide older man to scoot himself and you over, muttering, ‘well excuse me, I guess.’. Kurt settles into his spot opposite you, next to Logan. “Meanvile, I get broken up with, MANY TIMES! Including by him, and wat do I get!”

“We weren’t dating!”

“But you like to say I love you during sex, no? Oh, Kurt! Mo linm twa!” he mimicked, but the humor was in his voice, as it was in Remy’s as he retorts.

“At least I don’t pray the Hail Mary after sex!”

“At least I know the Hail Mary”

“I’m Cajun, do you really think I don’t know basic catholicism?”

“Could’ve fooled me.”

“I just have catholic guilt about.”

“You could use a little guilt, mein freund.”

“I’ll leave that to Scott.”

Hank slaps the armrest of his seat. “If we’re not actually going to watch a movie-”

Remy and Kurt laugh, and Remy starts the movie.

As you watched, you couldn’t help think about how good life had gotten. A peaceful, easy feeling comes over you as you listen to Kurt and Remy whisper to each other the whole time, Logan telling them to ‘shut the hell up or I will stab you.’ Morph loudly booing the cheesy sex scene, and Hank letting all of us know what is impossibly and unrealistic in the movie. Things were good.

There was, however, a gnawing piece of your mind… it reminded you what Remy said. Scott knows. Scott knows what you’ve been through… or what you’ve done, you didn’t let Remy finish.

You’d figured Charles had told Scott at least a baseline of what you’d experienced. Scott was his man on the ground, the one who had these day to day interactions with you, the staff, the teens. It made sense, and you didn’t expect the top teacher and school leadership (and basically the HR department) to NOT know one of his staff was severely traumatized.

You’d JUST told Logan what you’d done. You’d told Remy last month. You just wanted them and Mr. Xavier to know… had he gone and told Scott you were a killer? Did people other than Scott know?

After

Jean was all ready at the table when Logan brought you in, gently laying you down on the bed for Jean to examine.

“What happened?” She asked, frowning as she looked at your slightly bloodied face. The cabinet hit your forehead and nose.

Logan began to answer. “She hit her face on-”

“I was asking Miss Palmer.”

Scowling, Logan shut his mouth. “I… I slipped on water cleaning up from the party. My face hit the cabinet.”

“Did you fall?”

“No, I caught myself. Or- I think Logan caught me? It’s kinda hard to remember.” It was fuzzy, honestly. You’d thought he hit you, the ghost of the slap still stinging your cheeks… but that was probably something else.

“Yeah, I caught you.” He strokes your cheek, soothing the leftover pain there.

Jean does her work, informing you that you were mildly concussed.

“You’ll need to rest. No work for a few days minimum.” She raises an eyebrow at you. “No repeats of when you got sick and refused to tell anyone until you passed out. You’re going to take off the rest of this week.”

You open your mouth to argue, but she points a finger with a slight smile. She’s tired, but her bedside manner is compassionate. “No. We can shuffle a few things around. Wade can take over a few simple classes while he’s here and move those teachers to your kids, and Hank can easily slide back into teaching English. Well, maybe high school and middle. I can handle the littles.”

She turned to Logan.

“Logan, I don’t think we can get you off that long, but we’ll get you off a few classes so you can look after her. I’m sure Wade will be happy to teach gym, and Professor can take on history. Next week is finals anyway, so I know you guys have a lot of study periods planned.” She touches your shoulder. “It’ll be okay.”

You nod, but there’s a more pressing issue. “And Stevie?”

Jean smiles. “He’s doing fine. Don’t take aspirin as it could cause bleeding but tylenol is okay for your head pain. Stay hydrated, nothing caffeinated.” She types everything up for you, then prints it out. “Here’s a care plan, but know I’m right here if you need me.”

“Thanks, Jean.”

Logan gave a nod. “Yeah, thank you. I know you were in bed.”

She closed up her laptop. “Not a problem. Now, I know you’re seeing a regular doctor, and that’s okay… but I thought… if you’d like, I could share what I saw when I checked on Stevie.

You blink. “You mean… like an ultrasound?”

“Kind of, but much more clear. It’ll be almost like you’re there with hi-”

“Yes!” You’re so excited you almost forget any fear or pain.

Logan nods his head, eyes wide, and takes Logan’s hand before laying her other one on your stomach again. Suddenly, her mind’s eye was your own, and you could see him. You little baby asleep in your stomach, and it was like he was in a pool of water; not quite totally clear, but not blurry either. It was incredible.

You begin to cry.

“Go get your girl to bed, Logan.”

Logan laid you down on to bed after having you drink a bunch of water. “Wake me up when you need to pee, okay?”

You don’t look at him. “Okay.”

There is a short pause. “Hey.” Logan cups your face, bringing it to you. “It was an accident, okay? Just an accident.”

And all you can do is give him a smile, because you don’t know what option you have. “I know. I’m kinda tired, Lo. Can we talk in the morning?”

He gave a sad smile back. “Yeah dollface, we’ll talk in the morning. You’ll see. It’s all be better in the morning. I’m gonna step out for a sec, but I promise I’ll be here if you need me, okay?”

“Yeah, okay.”

“Goodnight, baby doll.” He kisses your tummy. “Goodnight, Stevie.”

Logan’s head was reeling. How did that happen? What the hell even happened? He hurt you, he hurt you, his pregnant fiance, his sweet, loving girl, carrying his child. What if something had happened to Stevie? Jean said he was fine…. But what the fuck did she know? Nothing! That bitch and her smug attitude. Stupid fucking cunt. She was probably just lying, trying to sabotage him. Not wanting to have his baby wasn’t enough. She can’t let him be happy. She won’t let anyone else have his baby. She’s just as bad as Scott, stupid mother fucking pansy ass shithead. Couldn’t fuck his wife right then got mad she needed someone else to satisfy her. Must’ve learned how to take it up the ass like he’s always dreamed and won her back, now he can’t let him be happy.

They are out to get him.

Logan needed to clear his head. He needed to let it out.

He needed insight from someone who, while being God perfect idiot, had a strangely good sense of the world. Sure, he didn’t understand what the fuck the mouth was talking about half the time, but Wade understood the world in a way Logan couldn’t.

When Wade answered his door, he was in a hello kitty t-shirt. That was it.

Logan only paused a moment before saying. “Meet me in the west lounge in 5?”

“Hell yay!” Wade sleepily cheered. “I’m on my way!” He began stepping forward, but Logan stuck a hand out to shove him back, He glanced down to his dick, then back up. “Pants on, Wade.”

An hour later, Logan had spilled it all. The slap, the… sex he might have been a little forceful on, how Stevie’s conception was from that… half drunk, he let it all out.

And for once, the merc with the mouth only had 4 things to say.

“Jesus fucking christ, Logan.”

Okay, next chapter we see logan baring it all and i think??? I think we see what triggered logan into the assult

ugh its soooo hard to plan i keep changing the outline so much. This series has given me the most problems out of every series ive written! and ive written many ;-;

Anyway guys im talking to a guy and he knows x men stuff and is chronically online like me and i realllllly like him we met on hinge bc he made a Jim Croce reference which if you know me you know i looooove old music!!! heres too hoping!

I sent him my x men restaurant au bc he's familiar with fanfiction! he really enjoyed it :))) Im taking requests for the restaurant au drabbles!

I also started a romcom/omegaverse/enemies to lovers Logan x reader! Im leaning into the goofy and silly bc too much dark i think isnt good. dark fics help me work through things but too much is.... too much. Im not in a great place mentally rn so i dont wanna linger you know?

I also want to just highlight my go fund me bc im once again struggling greatly to pay for school and im just... so close .;-;

@multiversed-daydreamer @my-secret-shame-but-fanfiction @del-ightfulling @miraclesabound @hindi-si-ikay @samsamsantos @madamerubrum @shybluebirdninja a @hornystan @rogueinmymind @accountforreading123 @yawnetu @princessanglophile @and-claudia a @new-genesis100 @teaganthemorningstar @oldloganslittleslut @zaggprincess2 @bugsinmyeyez @groundclueless @cosmolight @nonamevenus

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gay-wh0re-slut · 2 years ago

Note

I have a request...Dom!Rhea x Fem!reader in which the reader is caught masturbating and Rhea punishes her by causing many orgasms and overstimulating her

AAAYYYOOOO this is hot yall have some of THE best ideas i can’t thank yall enough for feeding into my slutty writing hehehe

i hope you enjoyyyyy

Wait

rhea x fem!reader

content: thinking about ur hot buff gf so you get busy by yourself but she catches you 😌 (masturbation, vibrator, oral, fingering, choking, strap, degradation and praise, super overstim and multi-gasms, slight sub!rhea)

Monday nights were always so lonely because Rhea was in a random city and you had no clue when she would be back home. The weeks she was gone felt like forever, luckily, sometimes she was only gone for a few days and was able to come back home for a day or two before flying off to somewhere new.

The two of you weren’t shy about sending some spicy pictures when you were alone in bed, the only rule was that it had to be over instagram so that they couldn’t be saved and potentially be leaked, for both of your sake.

Tonight, you were lying in your large bed that you shared with the wrestler, watching Monday Night Raw.

“Here in Orlando, Florida!” said the announcer.

You were grateful that she finally had a show in her home town so you knew she wasn’t far away. As the show went on, she was looking especially good tonight in her gear and makeup. The way her top accentuated everything just right, and her shorts were a little cheekier than normal. Her makeup was more eccentric than her normal purple eyes and her hair was thick with sweat from her match. The way she ran her hand through her hair as she stared down her opponent made you feel some type of way.

You didn’t notice you were constantly shifting and squirming in the bed until she finally pinned her challenger staring hungrily right into the camera. She threw the woman to the side and you couldn’t help but wish that you were the one being thrown around.

Finally giving into your cravings after the show ended, you send a sneak peek of your hand under the waistband of your pajamas shorts with the caption ‘you look so good tonight baby’.

She sends one back of her biting her lip, ‘you better wait until I get home’. You huffed at her response. You were getting more and more turned on as you thought of the many things she could do to you.

‘Hurry, please, I need you bad’ you sent her a pic of your hand out of your pants to prove you were waiting.

The next pic she sent was in her car, ‘don’t worry baby I’m coming’. Her makeup still on and her hair messy from her night. You loved her no matter what but you loved getting to mess up her makeup more than it already was; you also didn’t mind the black lipstick marks she would leave on you.

Although you knew she was coming home soon, you truly did try your best to keep from pleasuring yourself, but you couldn’t help it. You tried reading, you tried watching the show that came on after RAW, you tried every social media platform but everything reminded you of her and the ache you needed to soothe.

You felt a bit guilty but you did it anyway. You slipped your hand down and onto your throbbing center. Grazing your fingers over your folds, you felt how wet she made you without even being here. You started to gently draw small circles over your clit causing a small moan to come out. As you continued, you closed your eyes and imagined that it was her hand, pleasing you, making the pressure in your stomach rise, thinking about how she knew just what to do with you and how good she made you feel.

You were so immersed in this fantasy that you didn’t hear her come through the garage door calling for you, mainly because the TV was loud but you were so far gone already that it didn’t matter.

Unfortunately for you, you were making just enough noise to where she could figure out what you were doing before she walked into the bedroom.

You were going full force, your pace was fast but steady as you were arching your back, whining for the release. The pressure was close to its breaking point.

She crept into the bedroom watching you squirm under the covers until she could tell you were about to cum and she ripped the covers off of you, “What did I say?” she growled.

You screamed in shock, “SHIT!” you immediately pulled your hand out, “don’t do that! I thought you were a murderer!” you scrambled up onto the pillows muting the TV.

“You didn’t do as I said,” she stood over you.

“I know, I’m sorry,” you whined, “You just look soooo good tonight I couldn’t help it,” your center was aching for a release.

“You will definitely be sorry,” she said in a low voice before throwing off her tshirt and sweatpants revealing she still had her gear on.

“So you wanted me to take it off, huh?” you poked the bear.

Ignoring your question, “You couldn’t even wait for me to drive the thirty minutes to get here,” as she climbed on top of your straddling your hips.

“I’m so sor-”

“God you’re such a slut,” she put her hand over your mouth to stop you from saying anymore. “I was thinking in the car about all the things I could do to you…”

Your eyes were wide and your breathing was labored but you didn’t dare try to speak.

“…but you’ve just made it so easy for me,” her voice was deep and calm which scared you and turned you on at the same time. “Mmm,” she snapped the fingers of her free hand, “you were gonna be treated so well. I was going to take my time, really take my time, make you feel so good,” she leaned over you coming face to face with you, “but you don’t deserve the princess treatment,” she whispered.

If she barely grazed your core right now you’d be done for, immediately. She forcefully let go of your mouth as you took in a deep breath, still not saying anything.

“Since you want to be a whore,” she bent over you opening the drawer to the nightstand, “you’re gonna be treated like one,” and she pulled out the vibrator.

You knew you would be here for a while when she pulled that out. Your heart was in your ass but you couldn’t be more turned on. You gulped in response watching her situate herself on top of you to get the best position. Once she was comfy, with your legs spread and her kneeling in between them, she turned it on. It automatically starts at the lowest setting which you were grateful for. You were also grateful that she decided to keep your pajama shorts on…for now.

Placing the wand just barely on your already swollen clit, you immediately moaned at the touch.

“I’m gonna get you so close over and over until you’re crying to cum for me, then maybe I’ll let you,” the australian accent barked.

“Fuck,” you whined as she pushed it harder onto you, “p-please don’t,” you lied.

“If you listened in the first place, we wouldn’t be here,” as her free hand glided up your leg.

You were fisting the sheets below you, breathing heavily as you whimpered quietly. Because of the event prior to her walking in, you were already close so it didn’t take long for the familiar feeling to creep back up again. And she could tell too, your breath gets shallower and faster and your legs tense up just before.

She left her hand on your thigh, waiting for the signal and there it was. As soon as your legs twitched she pulled the machine away from you.

You growled in frustration, slamming your fists down.

“Aw, someone’s all worked up,” she mocked.

She let you catch your breath, eyeing her smirking devilishly at you. Once your legs became relaxed again, she placed the vibrator back onto you, with more pressure this time.

“Oh god,” you moaned, arching your back and the process started all over again.

Heavy breathing, clenching fists, legs tense up, remove the machine.

Replace the machine, heavy breathing, clenching fists, legs tense up, remove the machine.

Your legs were shaking so badly now it was hard for her to determine if you were tensing or not so she decided to finally take off your shorts. As her tattooed hands peeled them off you, a pool of your wetness seeped out onto the bed below you.

“Look at the mess you’ve made,” she smiled evilly, “all because you couldn’t listen,” she sighed dramatically.

“Please let me cum,” you whined, “I can’t do that anymore, please.”

“Don’t worry babygirl, you’ll get there,” she finally turned it off and set it aside. The wrestler easily scooted herself back towards the foot of the bed using your legs as leverage.

You groaned in response but it quickly turned into a moan when her tongue pressed against your wet folds. She lapped up as much as she could before she began to suck on your tired clit.

“mmmmRheaaa, please,” you breathed.

“You know the rules,” her voice was deep as she stared at you with those sapphire blue eyes.

One of her hands that was holding your legs open, moved to your entrance, asking to go in. Without much warning, she easily slipped two fingers inside of you slowly, letting you feel her the whole way.

Your back arched as soon as she did, slamming your eyes shut. “F-fuck,” you whined as she slowly began to pump in and out of you while her tongue continued to work. You could feel her smiling into you which drove you crazy.

Not too long after, your walls began to clench around her fingers and your legs tensed up once more, but in a matter of a second she pulled out and sat up.

“Fuck!” you yelled in frustration covering your face. Tears were forming under your hands but you didn’t want to let her see. You quickly wiped them away but avoided eye contact.

All she did was chuckle as she slinked off the bed. You didn’t want to know what she was doing because you were too upset so you closed your eyes and tried to drown out any noise.

After a few minutes you felt her climb back on top of you so you finally looked at her. “Damn it,” you sighed as you spotted the strap she had put on.

“Aw, come on now, princess. I thought you loved this,” she said mockingly.

“Yeah, when I’m not mad,” you shot back.

She immediately lunged forward and gripped around your neck with her hand, your eyes widened as you held onto her wrist trying to catch your breath.

Her eyes turned dark, “a slut like you should be grateful I’m even here to begin with,” she snarled. “You’ve been doing so well,” her eyes softened, “don’t fuck it up,” her voice was deep again. She held on a little longer to get her point across before she let go.

“I-I’m sorry,” you forced out, “I won’t.”

“Good girl,” she held out her hand, cupping it in front of your face, knowing she didn’t have to say anything for you to know what to do.

So you spit in her hand then watched her spread it over the strap. She readjusted herself to get it positioned just right. She basically folded you in half before leaning on her hands that landed beside your chest. Her thighs held your legs open as best she could. She looks down at your wet center as she guided in the fake dick.

“Oh god,” you gasped gripping onto her large biceps.

Ever so slowly, she watched it move in and out of you. Once she was satisfied with how it was going, she finally looked at you, “Since you’ve done soo good for me, I’ll let you cum…”

“Thank-”

“Over and over and over,” her thrusts became more frequent.

You groaned at her but didn’t want to make her more mad so you opted not to say anything. Her pace quickened and it didn’t take long for the pressure to build up again seeing how it had been there since the beginning.

Your nails dug into her arms as your legs began to shake again, your breath was leaving your lungs but you managed a quiet, “please.”

The black lipstick smiled devilishly at you, “do it,” she commanded.

And so you finally did. Your back arched as best it could, your legs shook vigorously, your hands slammed onto the bed, and you screamed in pleasure. You came so hard you were seeing stars.

Her hips kept plunging into you letting you ride it out but she had no plans of stopping there. In one swift movement, she pulled out, flipped you over, hiked your hips up and shoved it back into you.

“Holy fuck…yes,” you whined as she continued to wreck you.

She was gripping onto your hips, slamming you back into her, going as deep as possible. “Again,” was all she said.

After about a minute or so, the pressure was right back where it belonged. Hearing her labored breathing and small grunts helped you over the edge. The next one came unexpectedly but you didn’t mind and neither did she. You screamed once more as you bit down onto the sheets. Giving you a slap of satisfaction on your ass, you slid off the strap when she pushed you to the side.

She laid down next to you on her back and pointed at her hips, “sit.” When she was determined and in a mood she didn’t speak much, but she didn’t need to.

Weak and sweaty, you slowly sat yourself onto the dick. You grinded against her, feeling it swirl around inside you. You threw your head back, “mmmm,” as you leaned yourself on your hands that were stationed on her thighs.

She gripped your shirt that you forgot you had on and pulled you forward. She finally gave you a sloppy kiss, moaning into the sensation which sent shockwaves through your body. You loved hearing her. Letting go of the kiss, she held your hips and guided them up and down, making you bounce on the strap.

You tried to hold yourself up on your hands but you were too weak so you laid on top of her resting your head on her shoulder. You whined and moaned with every bounce into her neck.

“Mmmfuck…baby,” she breathed. This made you notice that she was getting off on this. You weren’t exactly sure how but you didn’t question it. Hearing her moan gave you a second wind, so you sat up, braced one hand on her thigh and cupped her face with the other, grinding and bouncing on the dick determining what she liked best.

As you rode her, the hand on her face moved to her neck and gripped as best it could but it wasn’t even close to her strength. She didn’t mind though because she moaned loudly at the feeling, sending her eyes rolling back into her head.

“God,” you growled, “you feel so good.”

She whimpered in response, and dug her nails into your hips.

Finally focusing back on yourself, you realized that the familiar knot was back. It wasn’t much longer until you released once more, doubling over her, shaking and crying out in pleasure.

And she followed soon after. “OH FUCK,” she screamed as she arched her back pushing her stomach into you. Her hands flew to your hair and back gripping and clawing their way through it. The two of you rode it out as long as possible.

You slowly got off of her and slumped beside her. You were both breathing heavily with your eyes closed taking in the moment. Neither of you could speak, you were so drained.

After a minute or two she slipped out of the strap and dropped it to the floor with a thud. “Was I too harsh?” she said weakly.

“Not at all,” you finally opened your eyes to look at her but she was already looking at you.

She gave you a sly smile, “so you liked the look tonight?”

“Ffffuck yes.”

#rhea ripley #wwe #rhea ripley x reader #dom!rhea #i need her so bad

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chirpsythismorning · 1 year ago

Text

Can we talk about how Jonathan might've been able to clock Mike simply because of what happened with him and Nancy in season two?

This will be a long post, so you might want to strap in or save it for later.

In Will and Mike's case, it would obviously be much different from Jonathan and Nancy's situation, given that you know, they're gay. But we still have Jonathan arguably going through a similar experience as Will, while Mike is going through a similar experience as Nancy.

In s2, we see Nancy confront Jonathan about how she waited for him before getting back with Steve, which is a revelation to him. Then they're at Murray's and she's struggling to say she loves Steve, after a handful of moments between them that felt like she might return Jonathan’s feelings. And you can clearly see it in his eyes, listening to Murray imply that they have feelings for each other, with him looking back and forth sort of in awe of what's happening, like he's starting to question if she might actually like him back.

Will doesn't have that same affordance as Jonathan to really hope, at least not anymore. Which is why these relationships in s2 and s4 end differently for these two brothers.

Based on all the signs he was seeing that Nancy felt the same, Jonathan decided to take the plunge to admit to Nancy how he felt, and at that same moment Nancy had the courage to show how she felt. In Will and Mike's case, Will wasn't ready to take the plunge to admit to Mike how he felt, at the same moment Mike didn't have the courage to show how he felt.

What's so painfully hilarious to me about all of this though, is that Jonathan arguably starts the season in the same shoes as most of the audience, where from his perspective, it's becoming obvious to him now that Will like's Mike, but that Mike does not feel the same way.

First at Rink-O-Mania, Mike appears a little uncomfortable upon hugging Will. Then as the happy couple continues on their adventure into Rink-O-Mania, he watches Will lagging behind moping. And then unfortunately he's out of commission for the rest of the evening...

But once he's sober and back to being an attentive brother the following morning, we see him watching them at breakfast, with Mike barely sparing Will a glance, all while Will is blatantly staring, almost like he's waiting for Mike to look back, only for Mike to get up and walk away.

All of these instances gotta be SCREAMING unrequited gay love to Jonathan. He's already gotten signs for years that Will is gay, these are now just the signs that are instilling his suspicions that Will has feelings for Mike. He could have easily interpreted their relationship in the early seasons as young best friends, with Will seeming to have a crush on Mike, and with them growing up and that potentially including Will's straight friend distancing himself from him because he doesn't feel the same. It's not the most unexpected thing in the world considering.

But then there's a shift.

Suddenly he's creeping up on them talking in his room. And we know he was listening in on the conversation because he brings up Owens when he sits down. As he's eavesdropping, he's probably thinking something innocent like Aww they're making up! And like, hey! Even if Mike doesn't feel the same, which is okay and entirely expected honestly, at least he still cares about Will enough to make things right after acting so out of character. Still, I'm not gonna lie, that sounded a lot like flirting to me--

Then he's knocking on Will's door like 30 minutes or less later only to find Mike and Will back on their bullshit. Mike suddenly isn't going out of his way to ignore or put Will on the back burner. In fact, he's on his bed and they're talking, again! The door is even closed this time, which is interesting. This has gotta be a good sign in Jon's eyes. Nothing to worry about! Right? Right...?

But then suddenly this shift continues, going in a direction he probably didn't expect.

I mean, this is literally an identical jancy parallel we have here with byler on the hood of the car, with Jonathan right there to witness it. Despite him maybe only now subconsciously picking up on the similarities between Will and Mike to him and Nancy here, he's at least taking note (I mean he's even got his gay map out and everything).

It isn't until the van scene happens, that I think Jonathan starts to genuinely consider his suspicions, which is that Mike might actually like Will back.

EVERY time we get a shot of Jonathan looking back at Will and Mike in the van, followed by a shot of his POV from the rearview mirror, we're faced with Mike looking at Will while Will is looking away.

As Jonathan is hearing Will confirm his suspicions about his feelings for Mike, he's simultaneously witnessing Mike not looking at Will with disgust, but something more akin to reverence. All of those moments in the van that we witnessed, including all the ways Mike looked at Will and everything that was said, Jonathan was right there.

And what's even more insane about this scene, is that it circles back to Jonathan as a character himself.

I remember when people were talking about how odd it was that we never saw Jonathan with a camera in s4. After 3 seasons in a row of making his passion for photography a big part of his identity, that part of him was apparently absent entirely this time around... But was it really?

This is the same guy that said, "Sometimes, people don't really say what they're really thinking. But you capture the right moment, it says more."

Jonathan might not have had his camera in s4, but this was without a doubt one of those moments where he captured something more.

Something that I also think get's highly overlooked about this scene, especially when it comes to Jonathan looking back at them, being followed by a shot of Mike staring at Will, is that he could see both of their reactions the whole time, from beginning to end. Will nor the audience had the affordance of knowing because Will was facing the other way at the end, while we on the other-hand were blurred from even having the chance, despite Mike literally being in the frame. But not Jonathan. He even lets us see what he sees, a few times, but not at the very end, which would have been nice after they didn't let us see Mike's reaction seconds before this.

Let's just stop right there for a second though and circle back to what I consider to be the first time Jonathan really picked up on Will's feelings for Mike, which was at the end of s3, in a sequence that is a little too relevant to the van scene if you ask me, given that they are almost direct parallels.

While these parallels are pretty spot on visually, they are also near spot on narratively when it comes to the evolution each of these characters are experiencing.

For Will in the first scene, it's sadness that he's moving away from his friends in Hawkins and also feeling like he's losing Mike, after what looks like him and El making up, which makes him scared he'll distance himself again. For Jonathan, it's sympathy for his brother who appears to have some very deep feelings for his friend, feelings he can't quite grasp yet but soon enough will.

For Will in the second scene, it's heartbreak that he has to accept that Mike will never feel the same, knowing that supporting his relationship with El (encouraging it honestly) will likely turn out just as it did last time, with him losing Mike all over again, for the last time. For Jonathan it's sympathy for his brother who has now confirmed his suspicions that the feelings he has for Mike are more than just that of a friend.

Given that this parallel reinforces the same feelings Will and Jonathan had in s3 to now, why would this not also reinforce those same feelings that Mike had in s3 to now?

In the first scene, Mike was visibly distraught, with dialogue from Hopper in the background applying a little too perfectly with what he was feeling in that moment, which was scared. He’s apparently back together with El now, despite them doing just fine as friends for the last 3 months, as well as him and Will just having finally gone back to them being on good terms again. But now, it’s like he’s right back where he started at the beginning of s3, feeling obligated to be the perfect boyfriend to El, and as a result, having no choice in his eyes but to distance himself from Will. Mike then walks into his house looking like a zombie, almost emotionless stepping into his mother's embrace.

Now, I say almost emotionless because it looks like Mike was trying to hold back showing how he truly felt in this moment. He's not crying like he did in s1 when he lost Will that first time. Time has passed and things have changed (he doesn't want things to change). And he's trying his best to keep it together. But the in-focus close-ups make it clear that he is definitely not okay.

What's so impactful about these parallels is that it presents the inner struggle both of these characters are having, both queer and experiencing doubts, but in different ways and for different reasons.

Will is the one who covers it all up with lies, hiding the tears in his eyes, because boys don't cry.

Mike is the one who has never cried to them, just to his soul (RUN AWAY! TURN AWAY! RUN AWAY! TURN AWAY! RUN AWAY!!!).

If you actually try to get a gage on Mike's in-focus emotions in that first scene vs. his out-of-focus emotions in that second scene, well they're not that far off from each other.

We go from Mike smiling vibrantly at Will, to him now slowly turning away to look back down at the painting, with whatever the hell emotion this is...

It's near impossible to catch because of how out-of-focus it is, but looking a lot closer, it honestly appears like Mike is feeling something akin to sadness that he's trying to mask. For a moment it even looks like he turns his head to wince emotionally, only to correct himself.

And call me crazy, but these shots also low-key parallel each other. Mike looking down trying to keep his emotions in check and failing miserably, only to look up and meet eyes with someone whose witnessing it.

With each shot before this of Jonathan observing Mike looking at Will, with him showing all the emotions Will never got to see and everything else in between, I wonder what Jon saw this time? Probably another thing he didn't expect.

Can you just try to imagine the silence in this van, accompanied by Will's muffled sobs, and then try to imagine Mike turning to look down at the painting, only to sneak a glance, and then go right back to looking at the painting, IN SILENCE, and then try to tell me how the assumption that Mike didn’t notice Will crying makes any sense, like realistically?

Yeah me and Jonathan are confused too.

Right now, Jonathan's probably wondering why Mike was acting a little fruity and repressed during the painting reveal. And that although he may have a penchant for being able to 'capture the right moment', Mike is sticking with his story (despite all the stalling and doubt). He is 100% straight!

And so maybe this is where Jonathan tries to accept what is being presented to him as the truth, despite the contradictions in front of him. It's likely that despite the way Mike looks at Will and acts around him, in ways he would have assumed coming from Nancy in s2 would've been evidence that she felt the same, it probably doesn't apply to Mike.

Maybe Jonathan's ready to accept that it's a lot more likely Will is experiencing unrequited love as a gay kid growing up in a small town, the most predictable experience a gay kid could go through, and in contrast Mike just feels too bad to let Will down easy.

Or who knows, maybe Mike could still be a little bit gay too...

But it doesn't matter anyways. Mike seems to be adamant about this and so there's really nothing else Jonathan can he do besides tell his brother he'll be there for him no matter what. And so he does just that.

But then Mike just has to surprise him one last time.

For those that don't know, the line Mike gives here in his monologue was in part pulled from Will's monologue in the van. Most don't know this because this line didn't make the final cut for the van scene, but in the official script the writers posted, what we find is an almost a direct parallel.

Which makes the reaction shots of Will and Jonathan directly after Mike says this all the more epic.

From Will's end he was probably hearing Mike say this and just thinking 'Damn. Well, that's what you get for using your feelings to inspire Mike to profess his love to El.'

But from Jonathan's end, I don't think his outside POV of these events overlapping was nearly as naive as his brothers understanding of the events. Because why the fuck would Mike need to use Will's feelings to inspire him to profess his love to El in the first place? Is this what Mike has been struggling with? Really? Why before every moment Mike takes action in this scene, is Will's hand literally pushing him into it? Why is Mike being so dramatic about saying I love you, stuttering and rambling about her being a superhero, not saying nearly as meaningful of things as what Will said in the van?

And then it hits him.

Mike is reminding him a little too much of another Wheeler right now...

Nancy Wheeler, who was afraid of what would happen if she accepted herself for who she really was, leading her to retreat back to the safety of Steve. Because Nancy liked Steve, but she didn't love Steve.

And now here is Mike Wheeler, who has went from being incredibly distant with Will after reuniting with El, something that is very unlike the Mike he knew in previous seasons, to something more himself again after they make up, with him looking at Will with adoration after hearing his words in the van, only to turn away and look heartbroken. Mike who is now struggling to simply tell El he loves her with Will right behind him literally yelling at him to do it.

And now it's like all those little moments are starting to add up to Jonathan.

Suddenly all those signs he picked up on from Will when he was younger are now blending in with moments Will shared with Mike. It was Mike who jumped in after him and his mom's speech to Will in the shed in s2, with tears in his eyes recalling the day that they met (without being asked, let alone pushed to). And it's Mike who is now looking like he's at war with himself as he attempts to give encouragement to El, just like he did with Will in s2, but this time he needs someone to push him to do it, and that person just so happens to be Will. After just finding out about Will's feelings and also while assuming El wants him to love her that way still, Mike is stuck.

I don't think it's takes a genius to consider Jonathan is capable of realizing how fucked they all are in this situation.

As much as Mike isn't ready for a sleuth of reasons, Will isn't ready either.

This provides a huge contrast between the bylers ², because while Jonathan and Nancy went through a similar experience to Will and Mike, them being ready to accept it and act on it didn't involve nearly as many factors and risks. Will and Mike also have the added barrier that is homophobia.

Will's internalized homophobia lies in part with assuming Mike could never feel the same based on some of the words he said in their last two fights, with parts being painfully reminiscent of the things his dad and bullies used to say about him. These are also words that contradict Mike's own words and actions from the previous seasons, things that did once give Will hope. The shame and guilt that comes with falling for your best friend, who you now know will never feel the same after being foolish enough to believe it not too long ago, and who might not even want to be your friend anymore upon finding out the truth, is understandable. He can't have hope like Jonathan can. It's just not the same.

Mike's internalized homophobia lies with assuming El wants him to love her, along with their relationship being expected and socially acceptable from everyone around him. Though unfortunately for her he feels abundantly more in love in the moments he shares with Will. Despite trying to make it work with El as hard as he could, because she's amazing and all any guy could hope for in a girlfriend, he can't ignore the fact that the feelings he has for these two people are different. The shame and guilt that comes with you, a boy, falling for your best friend, who is also a boy, and who is starting to show that he feels the same, all while you can't muster up the courage to break up with your girlfriend, nor can you muster up the courage to tell her that you love her, not when she's begging you, dying or even just simply at the end of a letter, is pretty understandable too. He can't have hope like Nancy can. It's just not the same.

Spoiler: They were not ready.

PS: I'm still not over the fact that they low-key confirmed these events elsewhere in the story...

#byler #st analysis #pocketgate #lettergate #i'm aware this is a hot (big brain) take #but i'm like 76% sure mike understood will in the van scene #also why mike is gonna finally be dealing with some personal business in s5...#just want to add that this makes the scene at Nina hit harder #also #mike trying and failing to tell el he loves her or break up with her at surfer boy and stalling because he just can't fucking do either?#mike's face when will pushes him to profess his love to el right in front of him???#honestly i dont think mike would've gone through with his monologue if he didn't think this is what el wanted in large part #i think he thought that if he did break up with her she wouldn't need him at all anymore #or more specifically if told her the truth she might hate him for it and just not want to be in his life in the aftermath of that #this is why he struggled so much with being honest #it was either lie and suffer but get to keep her in his life most likely or tell her the truth and potentially lose her and still suffer #it's just that now he has literally no choice but to conform and be with her all while knowing it's not what his heart truly wants #the heart not being true to himself jumpstarted the apocalypse #everyone act surprised #byler getting jonathan’d in s5 can be something so personal #no but imagine jon getting even more signals mike feels the same 😭#and he tries to talk to will about it but will just gets upset like pls stop why are you saying this?#or imagine him talking about it subtly with Nancy and her being like no way #only to see it for herself #maybe then Nancy would try to talk to Mike about how he’s feeling #idk I could genuinely see byler just getting byler’d individually #but it’s clear at this point Jonathan is extremely suspicious #honestly all I think it would take is him having intel about their previous fights #if he found out mike defended his behavior by insisting that they’re friends…#jonathan would just be like… oh shit.. the first lie…

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six-eyed-samurai · 3 months ago

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Hi! So i wanted to know if you could do tokyorevengers whit a reader who pretty much is someone you would go for if you got Daddy issues?

They act like such a father figure. They treat them like a small helpless child who needs to be taken care of. I just really need those daddy issues to hit HARD whit this one. If you can give it a kind of lana del rey vibe (whit likeing older men and men you probably shouldnt date and are lowkey a Red flag)

Maybe make the reader a bit of a Red Flag. Ofc you can pick how they can be a Red flag sometimes. Just really play into the whole daddy issues thing please. Ad as many characters as you want but pls ad izana and kazutora! I love ur work♡

A/N: HAPPY YOU LIKE MY WORK <3 i didn't really know how to write this so i went and read up some lana del rey songs to write this, and I kinda thought about Halsey's Blue music video for reference lmaoooo For reference the way I imagined reader here is kinda like Odasaku from BSD but a lot more messed up and depressed and unfortunately not as well dressed

🌸The rest of the world sees an ex-delinquent loser past his prime who barely has his life together, working minimum jobs, drifting around on his motorbike, with some very unsavory habits.

🌸Despite this he continues to persistently want to befriend you, following you around and yipping like some stray puppy. Your attempts to shake him off are absolutely futile - you can't chase him off at work, you're not gonna let a kid like him try and run after you on your bike across the roads and well, it can't hurt to have someone help run your errands.

🌸Reluctantly you start letting him hang around you. Cup noodles for every meal are more tolerable with someone else. He's so interested in your bike you grudgingly let him take your most prized possession for a ride. When he shows up with a pack of cigarettes just when you've finished yours you force down the smile before he can see it, opting to dryly ask which poor minion of his did he coerce into buying it again instead.

🌸You're a bad influence and you keep trying to remind him of it. He's already made a big hash of his life, yes, but he's still young and has time to turn it around, unlike you. He doesn't need to see you blackout drunk and throwing hands with someone violently. What is wrong with this kid, you wryly think all the time, insisting on helping you lug it home and clumsily trying to help you patch yourself up...or just hang around sullenly watching.

🌸Something you're constantly reminding them of is "I'm not your dad or something, kid, but -". It's immediately followed by you half-heartedly trying to get him to back off...although recently it's more of you doing your best to give the kind of advice normal adults should be giving kids like him, when he starts coming to you with his problems. "Can't your problems be something normal, like girl crushes or shit?"

🌸What on earth does he even see in you?

🌸Plenty.

🌸Having no stable, loving father figure in his life it was very, very confusing and unfamiliar for him to be treated like an actual child for once; he's in a gang, for heaven's sake, he beats up people and has done horrible things, he doesn't need you yapping about staying in school or not going out at night because it's "unsafe"! In the beginning it was jarring, if not irritating...until he grew to crave your offhanded praise and the times in your rundown apartment, the stale dinners and cigarette smoke. He'll put up with your nagging just for that, even if you keep saying he's playing cards wrong.

🌸 He's not helpless - far from it - but the first time he's ever seen you truly angry was when he showed up bruised from a fight. He's confused, why are you so upset? It's not even that bad and he beat up the guys who thought they could get the jump on him. You're silent for a moment, but the crushed cigarette is enough to indicate your inner turmoil, and you make him stay at his place for the night while you go out and...something. "Errands". Is this what it feels like to be really taken care of?

🌸You make everyone him uncomfortable though, and he doesn't know why. Don't they know how much you've done for him? So what if you're a significantly older walking red flag? He doesn't mention to you what happened to the fools who dared to call you a loser, because you'll get that disappointed look on your face and really, he craves your approval more than his next breath of air.

🌸One night he came over and flew into a panic when he found you weren't home. Neither were you at your workplace the next day. A neighbor takes pity on the agitated boy and informs him she didn't see you come home that day, but since your bike was still here you couldn't have gone far. His mental state deteriorated little by little with every hour you weren't there with a halfhearted scowl and "clear out" dangling from your lips along with a cigarette, and by the time you do get back he's convinced himself you had intended to abandon him, just like so many people had.

"Kid, are you crying?" You're so awkward it's almost funny, a grown man uncertainly putting a hand on a kid half his age's shoulder like it physically icked him to do so.

"No." It's more forceful than he meant. "Where did you go? I thought..."

Turns out you just got into a bit of trouble with the police. Nothing to worry about, all's cleared up now - except he looks like he needs a hug and an actual parent to wrap him in a blanket and say everything he should've been told. The best you can offer is a bike ride into the night.

🌸Can you understand why he can't be happy for you then, no matter how hard he tries, when you bring a good girl home and look at her with all the love and stars in your eyes, and she starts taking up your time, time you used to spend with him? His helmet becomes hers, takeout meals become home cooked lunches by her...yay, you've got your life together, moving to a better place and job, blah blah. He hates it even more that she's so nice to him, so caring of the hapless kid pathetically following them around.

🌸He does not want to be a happy family.

🌸It was just supposed to be the two of you.

Izana Kurokawa; Kazutora Hanemiya; Mikey Sano; Sanzu Haruchiyo

#sunny's works #tokyo rev x reader #tokyo revengers x reader #izana x reader #izana kurokawa x reader #kazutora x reader #kazutora hanemiya x reader #mikey x reader #mikey sano x reader #sanzu x reader #sanzu haruchiyo x reader #why do i keep spelling snanzu instead of sanzu

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berrymoos · 4 months ago

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🥭 ⏜ more regressor elle greenaway hcs!

➥ first batch here !! ⼃ tagging for team as family / team as caregivers , drunken regression [implied] , && padded agere

... if i had a nickel for every time i wrote something for elle instead of doing an essay due in 24 hours, i'd have 2 nickels, which isn't a lot but it's weird that it's happened twice, right? /ref. ; she's on the mind like crazy i am so ellebrained it's not even funny anymore. not a single day goes by where i don't think abt her she's just. AUGHHAHDJSHDJSH I'M CWAZY BOUT HER !!!!

🥭 ⼃ sudden touches r a big big no-no !! doesn't matter if it's a tap to the shoulder or a surprise hug from behind, they're an unpleasant reminder of the fisher king & a surefire way to send her into fight or flight mode. tickle fights are the biggest no-no (and unfortunately derek has learned this the hard way). even then, she goes through these "phases" in which she either wants nothing more than to cuddle or she's completely & utterly touch-adverse. the team checks in on her status by tapping her hand : pleasant reaction, touch is okay, unpleasant reaction, touch is not okay

🥭 ⼃ lots of tantrums because she has a terrible habit of keeping her emotions under wraps when she's big ; baby ellie doesn't have the strength for it, so it all boils over at the simplest of things, much to her dismay. she'll lash out over spilled apple juice or over a lost crayon, all because she didn't decompress after a rough week at work. her tantrums are destructive, like a hurricane tearing through anything in its path : hitting when she feels cornered, screaming, eventually retreating like a frightened animal. in times like these, gideon & jj are best at settling her

🥭 ⼃ her disdain for the phone increases tenfold when she's little ; she'll put it on silent, hide it under her pillow, & completely forget about it unless she absolutely needs it (ex, spence is shopping & she wants a snack). if one goes off around her she will whine & pout & huff until it's dealt with. much prefers hands-on activities like doodling & playing outside—if screen time is something she falls into, it'll be whatever is on tv. she always flocks back to old shows of her childhood, but occasionally she'll branch out to newer things if the synopsis is interesting enough.

🥭 ⼃ she'd rather die than admit anything relating to her headspace while big—literally includes trivial stuff like the kind of snacks she eats or movies she's seen. vague answers like “i don't know, i watch whatever's on” n “food is food, man, i'm not picky” . the team has to do full-on case studies when she's little just to find out anything (　-̥̥̥̥̥̥̥̥̥̥̥̥̥̥̥̥̥̥̥̥̥̥̥̥̥᷄◞ω◟-̥̥̥̥̥̥̥̥̥̥̥̥̥̥̥̥̥̥̥̥̥̥̥̥̥᷅ )

🥭 ⼃ spencer's ramblings continue to be music to her ears ; she takes in everything he says with the biggest brown eyes in existence, blinking at him eagerly as he chatters on and on about the history of ... well, who really knows! she certainly doesn't, but it doesn't matter to her in the slightest. the only way to get her down for a nap is if spencer is talking to her—get him to read a book & she'll be out before he gets through the first page.

🥭 ⼃ code white is the team's code for "elle is regressed on the field & we need to get her out of here." it's a conflicting situation for her ; she appreciates how they're not judging an involuntary reaction, appreciates how they care enough to take action, but she wishes they didn't have to. it's bad enough the fisher king lingers in her mind, but now she has to deal with her brain getting mushy & weird as a result at work? kick her while she's down, why don't you (-、-)

🥭 ⼃ definitely regressed in the hotel room with spencer. she isn't sure if it was reliving the memory as she confides in spencer, the alcohol lowering her walls, or both, but it doesn't take too much poking & prodding for her to collapse into his arms, sniffling, crying over any and everything under the sun. she's not much of a crier—spencer knows—but it's very hard to get her to stop once the tears begin. in the very least, elle didn't fall asleep alone that night

🥭 ⼃ during the four months of recovery leave, elle's nightmares struck with a vengeance. of course, she's had them before—when her dad first died & after cases that really struck a nerve within her—but it's the first time she's ever gotten so close to death. yes, she's been shot at ; yes, she's been hurt on the job ; but never has she been violated in such a manner in the comfort of her own home. never has she been in a hospital bed, fighting for her life while their unsub is still roaming free. many nights, she awoke screaming, crying uncontrollably in the darkness of her own room, huddled in bed, unable to move because the shadows are too big and too scary and she's only little and– uh-oh. a humiliating puddle soaking into her bedsheets. the idea of ... protection is one she absolutely despised at first, but she realized washing bedsheets most of every night isn't very efficient. she only wears them at night ; humiliation keeps her from going any farther

🥭 ⼃ ... when she's too little to truly recognize or deeply comprehend much of anything, the padding is more of an embrace rather than a chain

🥭 ⼃ she literally does not allow anybody to change her, either. as much as she loves spencer, jj, gideon, derek ... it's too intimate for her. it crosses boundaries she can't bend or twist for anybody else. she'd rather struggle with the straps all by herself, frustrated tears pricking her eyes, than have somebody see her at her most vulnerable

🥭 ⼃ big hoodies to conceal the padding !! elle has tons of hoodies of her own, but she likes stealing borrowing derek's cus they're suuuper–duper big & suuuuper–duper comfy !!

🥭 ⼃ on that note, she kinda hates pants while tiny ?? she'd much rather go without them because it's a lot more freeing in her mind, which is why she loves big, baggy hoodies, shirts, & things of similar likeness

🥭 ⼃ penny & morgan spoil her rotten, but penny is the worse of the two. while derek will indulge her desires from time to time, penelope is physically unable to say no to such a cutiepie like elle no matter how many times derek has taught her how to stand her ground !! elle will run to her if she gets in trouble by hotch or if derek is being silly with her ; she knows penny is gonna stick up for her no matter what !!

🥭 ⼃ petunia (her stuffed lamb) & mr brownie (jj's stuffed teddy bear) are confirmed best friends. they attend every single sleepover elle & jj have, every single playdate known to man ... inseparable bestie 4eva !! (until petunia has to get washed cus elle played too rough in the mud n got her all dirty ... but that's another issue for another day!)

🥭 ⼃ very blunt no matter the headspace. she will tell it like it is, well–meaning or not. it often gets her a mildly chastising glance from hotch, but many more giggles from the rest of her friends. (“tha’s mean, ellie!” jj will whisper, nudging her side. “’m not lyin’ ; he’s a big dummy!” elle will huff back, unbothered as she continues to play with her toys.)

#criminal minds agere #agere headcanons #agere hcs #fandom agere #padded agere #sfw agere #🧸．berry's headcanons #my baby my babyyyyy ... you're my babyyyy sayyy it tooo meeeee #elle greenaway you will Always be my special little thing <33

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saveahorserideaneddie · 5 months ago

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Long time no see…

wow it’s been a while…

for starters: i just want to say thank you to @lenaboskow and @mazzystar24

the two of you have stuck by me through the whole rollercoaster that has been my break from tumblr and i don’t think i would have wver come back if it wasn’t for the two of you, so thank you both for being such amazing, talented, beautiful, gorgeous friends to me through it all ❤️

and to those who have sent me kind asks/messages while i’ve been gone, thank you all for the kind words of support and encouragement as well- you are each appreciated so deeply and i can’t thank you enough!

so… a few things have happened while I’ve been gone

the first of which being my 22nd birthday in october which thankfully was spent with AC and a hot shower after having been without power for 12 days in the aftermath of Hurricane Helene; despite the inconvenience of having no power or water in those 12 days, i was still immensely lucky to have been safe and received no damage to my home unlike countless others who unfortunately are still recovering from the storm.

the other major-ish life update from my time away:

i adopted a puppy!!!

in early october (in fact, while we were still without power), I adopted this precious little girl (called ellie) from my local humane society.

she was around 3 months old when i adopted her, and in the beginning of January, she turned 6 months.

she has been a massive help in managing my anxiety and depression, keeping me company and giving me something to love and care for, and in the few months i have had her, she’s already wrapped me around her paw

i could not have asked for a better fur baby than her ❤️ she is probably the best thing that happened to me in 2024, and I cannot wait to see all the adventures life takes her on.

In other news; I’m back!

I had made the decision a few months ago to step away from tumblr as the landscape leading up to the s8 premiere of 9-1-1 was immensely difficult and taxing on my mental health, and I realized that it wasnt healthy to feel the way I so strongly did about the show or the fandom, and I needed to take a step back, alter the way i approached the show and fandom, and refocus on other things.

one of those things was refocusing on my job. shortly before i took a break, i had started a new job and was still very much in the training phase when i made the decision to take a break from tumblr. since then, i have been focusing on establishing myself as a reliable hardworking employee at my job, and i’ve also been focusing on the future;

i currently plan to take a flight attendant training course to become certified, and eventually find work with an airline.

because of this, 9-1-1 and the fandom have taken a back seat to more important things.

that being said, i still watched the entirety of 8a (not live, but a few days after airing once i had the chance to grill sarah and addie about what happened each episode- i have a lot of opinions on how things have gone and seem to be going but now is not the time nor place for that). i have still posted the occasional fic on ao3, and i am still working on my various wips as i am able to

i eventually realized how much i truly did miss being a part of the fandom, and have made the choice to come back, but going forward, i’m going to be doing things differently:

1. i will not be engaging in speculation or anything of that nature about future episodes- all it does is give me anxiety that manifests through frustration and i don’t want to continue feeding into that

2. i am going go be returning to my original philosophy of “the block and delete buttons are my friends.” in the last few weeks before my break, i found myself engaging more and more with toxic fans rather than just blocking them or deleting their replies to my posts- that won’t be happening anymore: if you come on my page being toxic or rude, you will be blocked and ignored because i do not have time for that shit

3. i want to branch out to other fandoms- this will remain a 9-1-1 blog first and foremost, and the majority of what i post will be related to 9-1-1, but i will also occasionally make posts about other fandoms/media that i have an interest in

4. most of what i post will either be fic related, headcanon related, or memes. as stated above, i do not have a healthy relationship with spec, and therefore i am not going to foster that by actively involving myself in it.

all that said, i’m really gald to be back, and i’m looking forward to being involved again! i hope everyone who stuck to the end of this long ass re-introduction post is having a wonderful morning, afternoon, or evening wherever you are in the world <3

#edimh #eddie diaz is my husband #edimh rambles #reintroduction #im back #911 abc #911 #eddie diaz #911 on abc #buddie #buddie 911

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cloveroctobers · 6 months ago

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starting to get to you — 9. Paul Cho (beef) [Winter Prompts]

A/N: Y’all have been asking for more Paul since forever and here’s me delivering it year(s)later. My concept of time has been trash since 2020 don’t mind me. I know this won’t probably do much in the notes department but I don’t really have anybody else to write about tbh. Also haven’t heard anything else on season 2 and if that’s still a go but they’re changing the storylines to anthology anyway which is unfortunate for Danny & Paul’s story and ironic since that’s pretty much all I write. At least we get to see YM in the last of us? Anyways! Happy new year to you all 🩵

~ @cigarettesandcoffeex I thought you might like a tag 😊

PROMPTS ARE FROM HERE & I’m using: DIALOGUE PROMPTS — "Someone spiked the eggnog!" + “Yeah, yeah i know, you hate Christmas.”

WARNINGS: language + innuendos, grumpy reader! & minor use of possible incorrect German.

<- read my previous winter anthology prompt here.

⛇･:*౨ৎ ⛇･:*౨ৎ ⛇･:*౨ৎ ⛇･:*౨ৎ ⛇･:*౨ৎ ⛇･:*౨ৎ ⛇･

At the holiday market was honestly the last place you wanted to be but having a best friend—who was broke mind you—who also adored Christmas was basically a set up to begin with. The both of you arrived to the festivities right before the sun set, since you had to go to work and Paul was gracious enough to give you an hour to decompress before bringing you out to interact with more humans.

You were content staying in, hate watching crappy Christmas rom coms, having some snacks, catching a few naps that you knew would hit perfectly since you had the day off tomorrow but you should have known Paul would make you his number one target to hang out with him. It’s not like you hated Paul’s presence by any means, he wouldn’t be your friend if you did, it’s just that Christmas wasn’t your thing.

And this year in particular felt heavier for some reason. Like you weren’t meant to enjoy the gift that is Christmas but you put on a happy face, caught an uber together down where the holiday market was held, and braced yourself against the chill in the California air.

It felt like the both of you had been here for hours, walking down the large street of vendors filled with too many people. Paul ended up pulling you off to a less crowded area so you could try the beverage he brought without anyone bumping your elbow in the process. Placing your lips against the rim, Paul watched you as if you were his favorite tv show, anticipating your reaction as you tasted the contents.

You’re coughing as soon as you do, “Someone spiked the eggnog!"

Paul furrows his brows first, plucking the cup from your hand and sips himself, before a grin appears on his face, “Whoa, you’re right! Guess that’s why this was called: Esther’s spunky Nog.”

Giving him a blank expression, Paul just laughs further before shoving a hand into the pocket of his hoodie and nudging his head for the both of you to continue, “C‘Mon, I heard there’s a mini tree decoration competition. Maybe that’s more your vibe.”

“Maybe if I get to stomp them out after everyone puts up the decorations?” You countered as you fall into step with Paul.

He rolls his eyes at you, taking another sip of the disgusting beverage, “I forgot how much of a grinch you are…you’re worse than Danny and that says a lot.”

Scoffing you say, “Am I supposed to be offended?”

“…I would be.” Paul mutters just for you to jam your elbow into his hip, “Ow! Hey! I’m just being honest.”

“And I’m being honest about Christmas being too much that it actually makes me want to gag.”

“I thought you didn’t have a gag reflex?” The twenty something year old man jokes, which immediately makes you walk off ahead of him.

Yet he didn’t want to lose you in the sea of people, however due to his height, he had the advantage if he did. Paul gives you your space for a little, enjoying the soft bells of music that plays from overhead speakers tucked somewhere above your heads, embracing the chilly air that Californians would often label as cold but wouldn’t last a day in areas that actually were in the winter, and he did find himself smiling at a family in particular that felt familiar until his senses pull him back to you.

You’re being led off to one of the stalls, disappearing beneath the tent and Paul has no problem pushing through people to get to you. Once inside the surprisingly warm tent, he sees you sitting in a chair chatting with a woman who has a heavy German accent, holding up a gingerbread heart.

“You good?” Paul questions, making your attention shift from the woman to him.

The heavy set woman who is dressed traditionally beams at the sight of Paul as she winks at you, “Liebling.”

Is all Paul catches and you’re shaking your head, which lets Paul know that you understand what’s being said and he’s out of the loop. The German woman pulls Paul by the wrist and shoves him into the space beside you.

“Nice to meet you too.” Paul snorts as the woman yells for the young man with the camera, while Paul slouched down beside you and leans towards you, “Guess you really have no choice but to get in the Christmas spirit now, huh?”

Crossing your arms you side eyed the man in the rolled beanie, “Little do you know, I already asked Mrs. Adelheid if she has any Krampus masks.”

It was Paul’s turn to give you a blank stare while you smiled sweetly at him, “What the fuck? That’s not very Christmas of you.”

“It is in Germany.” You bump his shoulder, smiling to yourself while Paul rolls his eyes.

Mrs. Adelheid comes back questioning and motioning what you two wanted on the gingerbread heart. Paul got the gist, pressing his elbows into his knees and letting a smirk grace his lips, “What about…y/n loves Paul? X-Mas ‘22.”

The annoyance on your face is evident while Mrs. Adelheid smiles at you two, before letting out a yell for the young teen to step forward and take their picture. Paul tosses an arm across your shoulder, leaning back against the chair and grinning while roughly pulling you into his side that you have to hold onto his chest so you don’t double over as you quickly look up at him. The camera flashes before you know it, making you call out to the anxious teen.

“Hey, I wasn’t ready!”

Before you translate it into the bit of German that you know. Studying photo journalism abroad in Germany was a tale within itself but it was definitely a learning experience.

“1 hour.�� Mrs. Adelheid informs the two after shooing her son off, “You’re welcome to stay and browse.”

Paul dips his head at the woman while you pull yourself away from under his arm. He lets his hand rest against his thigh, taking another sip of the warm spiked drink, smiling in secret amusement.

“How many likes do you think our gingerbread heart is going to get?” He asks.

Shaking your head you immediately reply, “You’re not posting that. We don’t even know how the picture came out.”

You understand getting raw footage but you can only wonder how this footage appeared.

“Quit your worrying, we’re hot and there’s no such thing as bad photos if you know your angles. And I would hope the kid would.”

“Seems like he’s forced to be here…something I can relate to so who knows?!” You throw your hands up in the air, “And I don’t need a repeat of your little fangirls threatening me on every social media account they stalk me on.”

Paul rubs at the back of his neck, “I did say I was sorry about that and made it clear to stream that no harassment towards you is cool…unless it’s from me of course.”

Your best friend was doing so well until he threw that last bit into it. It was during the summer time when Paul’s content creation slowly started to take off and people on the internet can definitely be more vicious since they felt like they had a screen that protects them. Even had a few “dedicated” fans pull up on you at work once, which was honestly the last straw and caused you to not want to be part of any streams Paul had going on.

He definitely understood and didn’t blame you.

The both of you sat in silence for a while, seeing the constant movement of attendees from outside the open tent. A few people would come in to browse and one ended up purchasing a wooden toy for their twins before it became quiet once more. Paul eventually got to his feet, looking around the vendor himself, knowing he couldn’t afford to purchase anything else right now but window shopping didn’t hurt.

You decided to browse your phone instead until you heard Paul’s booming voice, “Oh this turned out sick!”

That got you to your feet, moving to see the artwork. It was your photo in faded black and white placed in the shape of the gingerbread heart cookie, red frosting along the trimming, and a white string for it to be hung up. You peeked at Paul who appeared just like a kid on Christmas Day with stars in his eyes. Something so small brought him the biggest amount of joy and you were included on that.

The way your heart seemed to skip at the sight was something you’d never share.

“You like?” Mrs. Adelheid asks, “If not he will do it again.”

Paul shakes his head, “No! We love it, right?”

He glanced at you, hopeful.

A crooked smile appears on your lips, “We do. We’ll take it, you two do incredible work.”

Mrs. Adelheid smiles followed by a laugh at her own pun, “Herzlichen Dank.”

“Danke.” You still have a small smile on your lips, as Paul is holding onto the gingerbread heart by the string and the woman leaves to retrieve a padded box to protect it on your way home.

Your chin is hovering over Paul’s arm as he can’t seem to take his eyes off the cookie, “I told you we would look good as fuck. Or we ate down as you like to say. This is going to look fire hanging in the window…whoever decides to keep this and takes this home that is.”

Sighing, your lips part but Paul interrupts already having an idea of what you’re going to say,“Yeah, yeah I know, you hate Christmas.”

The longer you stare at the picture of you two together on this stiff cookie, the warmth that’s radiating from just standing beside your best friend, his soothing scent of ginger, mint, and cedar, and the way his own eyes are studying your gaze makes you appreciate the moment he’s loved all along.

Being around someone that mattered was perhaps maybe the only gift that you need.

“…I tolerate it because you love it.” Is what you come up with as your eyes meet his.

A stupid grin shines all over his features quicker than the glance he sends to your lips, “I’ve always known you were mushy underneath it all.”

“Don’t ruin it.” You shush with a finger to your lips.

Paul chuckles, “I won’t. It only lasts for a few seconds anyway.”

“Aw…you shouldn’t talk so low of yourself. It’s all about stamina.” You tease.

Paul scoffs, “Trust me, you don’t ever have to worry about that inside or outside the bedroom.”

Grimacing you lightly shove him, “Shut up, Paul.”

“You started it.”

Before you could get into a bickering match, the mother and son are back, wrapping and placing your gift into the box, collecting payment and wishing you a happy holiday before you’re blending back into the crowd. Paul’s holding onto the box underneath his arm, your arm is linked with his other now, and you’re stuck holding onto the eggnog that you’re occasionally sipping on to keep warm.

You don’t have much trouble doing that as your laughter echoes with Paul into the all and good night.

⛇･:*౨ৎ ⛇･:*౨ৎ ⛇･:*౨ৎ ⛇･:*౨ৎ ⛇･:*౨ৎ ⛇･:*౨ৎ ⛇･

Continue with my winter anthology prompts here.

#queued #beef #beef netflix #Paul Cho #Paul Cho x reader #Paul Cho beef #young mazino #young mazino x reader #winter prompts #winter fiction #christmas prompts

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olivia-anderson-fanfic · 4 months ago

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The cat that ate the canary

In which Yuu is a normal teenage boy who has recently adopted a totally-just-as-normal cat.

(Prequel for the zombie!AU)

You know, Yuu Shimura was a lot of things. A future vet, for one, if he had anything to do with it. A star student, if you ignored how often he was sent home halfway through the day because he had brought an animal to class. A decent cook, if you asked his mom, who also said that he was the special-est boy in the world, so take that with a grain of salt.

Good in stressful situations, he was not.

He didn’t know what to do about the dying cat he found while walking home from his friend’s house.

Don’t get him wrong, he wanted to be a vet! He had taken in so many charity cases over the years! But he had never…

Well, the cat was missing half a face. Its fur was matted with blood. There seemed to be a fungus growing on its tail. And it had a limp to boot (okay, to boot might not be the best way to describe a probably broken paw, but he had already admitted he wasn’t great in these kinds of situations!).

Frankly, this cat was far worse off than any of the other animals Yuu had taken care of.

And it was hissing at him whenever he got within a meter of it, too!

Admittedly, he was used to cats hissing at him, but it certainly wasn’t helping.

Now, Yuu should just leave the cat alone. Call animal control and ask them to put the cat out of its misery. That was the proper, good samaritan thing to do.

But the cat was in the middle of the street. It wasn’t quite the time of year when he would be too worried about snow, but it was just cold enough that every breath steamed in front of his face…

Yuu liked to think that he was a good person.

He knelt a few meters away from the cat, careful to keep his smile faint because animals often interpreted showing teeth as a threat. It was hard to smile, anyway, in the face of something so obviously in pain.

“Let’s see…” he mused aloud, trying to sound as soothing as he possibly could. “I need to find you food, at least. Not that it looks like you can eat right now… but it might help you believe I’m on your side. I only really need to pick you up for long enough to get you out of the street… maybe closer to a restaurant, they’re usually warm… I could, probably, just scare you into running in a certain direction, but that seems cruel… no need to traumatize you further… I’ll leave that for last…”

The cat continued to watch him. This wasn’t surprising. It would probably watch him until he left its sight.

Yuu ran his fingers through his hair, glancing at the nearest convenience store. They should have tuna there, but Yuu really didn’t want to leave the cat alone in the street…

“Ah, fuck it,” Yuu said, pulling cash out of his pockets. How much was tuna these days? Last he remembered, it was like 5 yen, but inflation existed, unfortunately… couldn’t be more than 10, at least.

He sprinted into the store and grabbed a can of tuna, all but throwing the money at the poor cashier, who looked more than a little stunned.

The cat… had almost managed to crawl out of the street on its own. It sat just in front of the curb, still staring at him intently.

Yuu, carefully, opened the small package of tuna and set it on the sidewalk.

The cat, still watching him, took a couple of steps forward, until it could tentatively sniff at the tuna.

Yuu breathed a sigh of relief. Not because it had eaten the tuna, the cat was gagging and batting it away with its paws, but because it was now solidly out of the street. He, with an open hand, reached toward the cat.

The cat eyed him warily, but he just, carefully, patted it on the head, briefly running his thumb over its fur.

It leaned into his touch, just slightly, its nose ghosting over his palm, sniffing him.

Yuu, quietly, hoped that the thing didn’t have rabies. It wasn’t frothing at the mouth, but that symptom didn’t set in immediately…

“Want to come home with me, baby?” Yuu asked, drawing one leg up to his chest. He always felt a little silly, talking to animals. It wasn’t like they understood him. But he found that, when he kept his voice soft and soothing, most of them calmed down. Animals weren’t particularly deceptive creatures, after all. If one had bad intentions, they made it obvious. So, if he seemed docile, surely he must be, right? “I might have to hide you under my bed so my parents don’t find out, but it can’t be worse than living on the street.”

The cat stared at him.

It, slowly, inched its way forward, until it could place a paw on his lap.

Yuu, gently, scooped it up and started off toward his apartment once again.

It was a relatively uneventful walk, save for the fact that it did, in fact, start raining. It was a light rain, just barely a drizzle, not the kind that you can take your umbrella out for without feeling a little silly… but Yuu took out his umbrella regardless, because it was too cold for rain, and this cat was already hurting, he really didn’t need it to catch yet another disease, too…

His apartment was quiet.

He clicked the light on, absently toeing off his shoes – he took a moment to make sure that his parents’ shoes weren’t there, more out of paranoia than anything – and made his way to his room.

He waltzed over to his closet and tugged out a small box hidden in the back corner.

Now, with most teen boys, the box hidden in the closet should not be touched, under any circumstances. Neither the kid nor the person snooping needs to deal with that kind of trauma.

Yuu, though? He was using his Secret Box to hide pet supplies.

He rolled out a pet bed for the cat and took a moment to scratch it behind the ears before dragging out a first aid kit.

And, so he got to work. The cat was a surprisingly well-behaved patient. It wasn’t the first time an animal had understood that he was trying to help it, but it was certainly the first time he didn’t get, at the very least, a look of betrayal for trying to cleanse a wound. Not that he was complaining. The cat looked sickly, and Yuu didn’t want to catch anything. The less it bit and scratched at him, the better.

Though… strangely enough, the cat didn’t have nearly as many injuries as he’d expected.

Like, yeah, half of his face was gone, obviously, and Yuu didn’t know how to deal with that so he simply wrapped it in bandages and decided that had to be good enough… but he wasn’t sure what was causing the limp. There were no injuries on the cat’s leg, not even a break or sprain, as far as he could tell. He still splinted the leg, because surely the cat wasn’t limping for no reason, and then moved on to the weird bit of… fungus? The strange spot on its tail.

He squinted at it, tempted to reach out and touch it, so he could analyze it closer, but not really willing to risk it. Instead, he cleaned it as best he possibly could (which, apparently, was little more than disinfecting it), and then pulled back.

The cat still looked worse for wear. It looked like something out of Pet Cemetery. Yuu had failed to make it presentable.

But he hadn’t expected to make the cat presentable, really, so he just heaved a great sigh and scratched it behind the ears.

“Alrighty, done,” he said.

The cat seemed content to lie there in his lap, unmoving.

Yuu sighed, again. He wasn’t allowed to move anymore, by cat-owner law.

He, slowly, tipped back until he could lay out on the floor. It wasn’t particularly comfortable, but it wasn’t like he had any other options.

His eyes fluttered shut.

By the time he opened them again, the cat had moved from his lap.

It was exploring his room, from the looks of things. Sniffing everything, rubbing up against each and every piece of furniture it saw, adding a few new claw marks to Yuu’s poor bedposts. Classic cat things, really.

Yuu sat up, slowly, wincing as he craned his head from side to side in a vain attempt to get rid of the crick in his neck. This must be his divine punishment for daring to lie on the floor. Who did he think he was, putting someone else’s comfort above his own? Really, this was his own fault.

This didn’t stop him from cursing under his breath.

The cat jumped at the sudden sound. It turned to look at him with wide eyes, staring at his lap, as if wondering whether it was supposed to stay.

Yuu fought the urge to coo over it.

“I should give you a name,” Yuu said, propping himself up on his forearms. He didn’t want to put a lot of thought into its name, considering it was probably going to die soon, but he couldn’t just call it the cat forever. It was dehumanizing!

Well, it wasn’t ‘human’, but that’s beside the point!

So, he carefully took all of the books out of his bookshelf and set them on the floor, deciding that whichever book the cat ‘chose’ (read: lingered by for longer than two seconds) would be the basis for the cat’s name.

The cat wandered over to the bookshelf, its nose poking at the single book Yuu had left.

Yuu grimaced as he picked up The Brothers Grimm. He’d had to buy it for his Culture elective. Something about understanding Western Culture. As if the internet wasn’t almost entirely Western Culture. Ugh.

Regardless…

“That – uh – isn’t the best name, it doesn’t really bode well for you…”

The cat continued to inspect the book.

Yuu sighed. “‘Grim’ it is, then.”

He felt a paw touch his side and raised an eyebrow. Grim was poking him in the stomach, repeatedly, staring up at him.

When it was sure Yuu was paying attention, Grim gave a squeaky little meow and started rubbing his face against Yuu’s side.

Yuu figured that Grim was, probably, starved for affection, and Yuu really didn't want to think about why... but that didn't stop him from thinking that Grim was adorable.

He reached down and scratched beneath Grim’s chin, careful of his injuries. “You’re a sweet little guy… can’t believe someone did this to you… poor baby…”

Grim gave a low purr, for just a second, before cutting himself off.

Yuu cooed, quietly. What a cutie.

He would have rested his chin in his hand, but dried blood had long since caked itself under his fingernails, so he really didn’t think that’d be a good idea.

Speaking of which.

“I should give you a bath,” Yuu said, already grimacing preemptively. “Any chance you’re one of those rare animals that’re okay with water?”

The cat stared at him. Whether this was because Grim had, from the looks of it, never seen water in his life, or if it was just because cats don’t understand human language was anyone’s guess, really.

Yuu scooped him up and headed into the bathroom. Grim seemed content to curl up in Yuu’s arms while Yuu awkwardly juggled a very injured cat and tried to set up the sink at the same time.

It was hard, but Yuu managed.

Now for the actual hard part.

He, slowly, set Grim on the edge of the sink.

“Look, it’s nice and safe and I made sure it was the perfect temperature just for you,” Yuu said, trying not to sound too nervous. If he sounded nervous, then Grim would notice and get nervous himself, and he would definitely refuse to go in the water then.

So, Yuu had to smile, softly, and trail his fingers in the water to show that it wasn’t dangerous.

Grim looked at Yuu. Looked at the water. After a long moment’s hesitation, Grim placed his paw in the water, as if testing the temperature for himself.

(Now, obviously, Grim was just testing to see if the water was truly ‘safe’, but Yuu liked to pretend that the animals he spoke to understood him, sometimes. Made him feel slightly less silly.)

Slowly, Grim waded into the water.

Thank you, Jesus! Wait – is Jesus the name of their God? Or are they separate people…? Uh, whoever did me this solid, thanks.

Yuu beamed. If Grim was safe to kiss, he would totally press a kiss to his forehead, but that could wait until after the bath… after a week’s-worth of baths, actually. To be safe.

For now, he went to work.

It was then that he noticed the strangest little tidbit of information about Grim:

Was Grim… green?

He hadn’t noticed it before, since the blood matting Grim’s fur had more or less covered the strange color. But, now, he carefully parted Grim's fur to peer at the skin hidden beneath it.

Yuu tilted his head this way and that. Blinked a few times to clear his vision. Lifted the cat out of the water to get it as close to the lights as possible.

No, yeah, that was green.

And, as Yuu started putting a little more elbow grease into scrubbing down Grim, he realized that it was not going to come out.

Yuu frowned. If it was dye, then he should be getting at least a little on his hands right now, right? He was pretty sure he’d heard his mom complain about accidentally getting black dye all over her towels before…

So, what was going on?

He leaned his hip against the rim of the sink.

“Maybe the dye’s been in there too long? So it can’t be washed out?” he mused aloud. “But it’s still…”

It would be one thing if the cat’s fur was green (and, to be fair, that might also be a dark shade of green that was making Yuu second-guess what color black cats were) but it was Grim’s skin that gave him pause. Because how does skin turn green?

Was it some kind of fungus? But he could see something that looked like mold on Grim’s tail, and that was a completely different texture...

It was possible that the cat had developed two separate types of fungal infections, but Yuu felt like that would make Grim particularly unlucky… there was no other explanation that he could think of, though.

He supposed he could look it up once he was done with this.

And, so, after washing as much of the grime and blood off of Grim as he possibly could, he gave the sink a quick scrub and then waltzed over to his bed, phone in hand, to do some research.

Grim settled down on the bed next to him, and Yuu flashed a smile as he continued scrolling through the internet.

Huh. So there are ways skin and hair can turn green, even in human patients… exposure to chemicals, mostly. Learn something new every day.

“So, Grim, did you eat…” He squinted at the words on his phone. “‘Ex-o-gene-ous copper’?”

The cat did not answer him. Because it was a cat.

But Yuu nodded along as if he had. “See, that’s what your problem is. Nevermind probably getting hit by a car, no, you fucked up when you saw a precious metal and said ‘is anyone gonna eat that?’”

Grim continued to stare at him.

Yuu smiled, patting him on the head once. “You’re so well-behaved. I’d give you treats, but…”

Well, the cat couldn’t even stomach tuna. He doubted it would be able to get down something as solid as cat treats.

Grim wouldn’t last long.

But Yuu was going to make sure that Grim’s life up until his passing was as peaceful as he could make it.

Unfortunately, he couldn’t spend every second with his new cat, because he needed to make sure his parents wouldn’t catch on.

He needed to act natural.

“Did anything happen today?” his mom asked.

Did she know?!

No, no, he shouldn’t panic. This was a normal question that people ask over dinner. She was just ‘expressing interest in his life’, or whatever.

Yuu set down his chopsticks, briefly, while he tried to think of something that wasn’t the cat in his room. “Not really. I saw this one girl trip and eat sh –... really hurt herself. It was terrible.”

His mother narrowed her eyes at him, briefly, but decided to let it go.

Or, at least, she was willing to let go of the near slip of his tongue. His behavior, though? No, that was unforgivable, apparently: “And you didn’t help her?”

“I couldn’t make her un-trip,” Yuu shrugged.

“This is why we’re never getting grandkids,” she lamented.

His father sighed. “Truly tragic.”

Yuu couldn’t roll his eyes at his parents without being rude, but he was rolling his eyes in spirit. Because, really, that was not the reason why they weren’t getting grandkids.

“Well, if you’d just accept the grandchildren I have already given you –.”

“Human grandkids.”

Yuu did not pout. No one can prove it, therefore he didn’t.

“I’d rather just focus on my studies, momma.”

(He’d tell them one day. Just… not today.)

A hand reached out and ruffled his hair, and Yuu flashed a grin.

“What did we do to have such a well-behaved kid?” his father said.

“Perhaps too good of a kid,” his mom said, her chin in her hand. “You’re in high school, you should enjoy it, Yuu. ‘Hang out’ with your friends more. What about that one senpai you really like? He’s probably free this week, how about you two go to an arcade or something?”

Yuu rubbed the back of his neck, fighting the blush creeping up his cheeks. “He – uh – isn’t really the type to go out and do things, either. And, besides, he’s got his new job, he’s super busy these days, so even if he did want to go out, he can’t.”

“Staying at home all the time can’t be good for you,” his father said.

Yuu could only shrug. “Hey, think about it this way – the less I go outside, the less strays I can pick up!”

The totally-not-a-stray Yuu picked up lasted longer than he’d originally assumed it would.

Grim survived until the end of the week.

Hell, he survived two weeks.

And Yuu wasn’t even sure how. The cat refused to eat anything Yuu gave him, and Yuu had yet to see evidence that the water disappearing from Grim’s dish was anything more than evaporation. Certainly, Grim should have passed away by now, and yet…

Well, Yuu had noticed a distinct lack of bugs over the past few days. Maybe Grim was catching and eating those? But then why was he gagging over the food Yuu gave him?

Maybe he liked the hunt!

Yuu tied a small bite of chicken to a piece of string, and then made his way over to where Grim was lazing in a patch of sun.

Grim’s ear flicked, and he, slowly, looked up at Yuu.

Yuu wiggled the string like his life depended on it.

Grim gave him a very unimpressed look.

So, not that, then…

He groaned, sinking to his knees, resting his arms on the sill beside Grim. “I don’t get iiiiiit,” he whined.

Grim continued to give off an aura of general disdain. Which is typical for cats, so Yuu wasn’t particularly worried.

(… not about that, at least.)

He pressed a kiss to Grim’s forehead. “You’re cute, but you won’t be quite as cute if you waste away into nothing because you won’t eat.”

Grim, being an animal who couldn’t understand a word Yuu said, sent a few lazy blinks his way.

Yuu groaned again, a little louder this time, before giving up.

His eyes fell to the ground, several stories below. He could see a couple of teens chatting with each other as they walked home from… whatever they had been doing with their Winter Break.

Hm. He should call his senpai.

Not because he thought Idia would know what to do about Grim. But because Idia was prone to shutting himself inside his house for weeks at a time. Someone had to drag him back into the world of the living from time to time, and Yuu took his job… well, not very seriously, considering he himself was prone to getting distracted by every cute animal that wandered into his sight line, but when he remembered to do it he sure did!

And, so, he dialed Idia’s number.

His phone didn’t even finish its first ring before a familiar voice came through: “Shimura-shi, you’re alive.”

“Senpai,” he said, trying not to sound too happy that Idia had actually picked up.

“I was wondering when you’d remember I exist,” Idia said. Yuu could hear the familiar clicking of Idia’s keyboard through the phone.

“Aw, that’s not fair,” he said. “You’d get it if you saw my new baby.”

Idia sighed. “Is it a cat? Because otherwise I’m not interested.”

“He is a cat, yeah,” Yuu said, absently running a hand over Grim’s fur. “And he’s so precious. I don’t know what his previous owners did to him, but they’re going to Hell.”

“You’re religious now?”

“Solely for the sake of sending them to Hell, yeah,” Yuu said, nodding solemnly even though he knew Idia couldn’t see. He could only hope that his tone was enough to get the point across. “Do you want to say hi to him?”

“Obviously,” said Idia. Yuu wasn’t sure why he’d bothered to ask.

He put the phone on speaker. “Grim, say ‘hi’!”

Grim stared at Yuu for a solid five seconds before heaving a kind of put-upon sigh and meowing quietly.

The sound that came through his phone was a squeal so high-pitched that it spooked Grim. The cat’s fur stood on end, and that was all the warning Yuu got before his lovely companion darted away to the safety of Yuu’s bed, disappearing under the blankets, never to be seen again.

“Damn, senpai, are you trying to make me go deaf?”

“Sorry – it’s just – you know how I feel about cats!”

Yuu sure did.

But that didn’t mean he wasn’t going to tease Idia a little, when given the opportunity: “Says the guy whose job does animal testin –.”

“Shhhh, not in front of the baby!”

Yuu snorted. “Grim ran off when you broke the sound barrier earlier. But fine, fine, I’ll take you off of speaker.”

He brought the phone back to his ear.

“Alright, you’re safe now, my child can no longer hear about you and your shady secret internship at a ‘makeup factory’.”

“Our child,” said Idia. It was clearly an attempt to get Yuu to leave the subject of Idia’s job alone, Yuu was already well aware that the guy was beholden to several NDAs.

And yet.

Yuu felt his face warm, and was suddenly glad that Grim couldn’t see him. Not that Grim would understand what it meant, of course, but it was still embarrassing.

“Really? You need to step up in the child-care department, then,” Yuu said.

“Well, I’m busy taking care of our other child, so,” Idia said.

Yuu’s smile faded, if only slightly. “How’s he doing?”

“Same as usual. Do you want to talk to him?”

“If he’s feeling up to it,” said Yuu.

There was about a minute of silence. Yuu could hear quiet chatter, but couldn’t quite make out the words.

And then:

“Yuu-tan?”

“Hey, Ortho-chan,” Yuu said, quietly. “How’s it going, bud?”

“Good!”

Yuu’s shoulders relaxed, if only slightly. “Yeah?”

“Mhmm! Nii-san played with me alllllll day!”

Yuu smiled. “That’s awesome!”

“... wish you would come n’ play with me, too, sometimes,” Ortho said, and Yuu could practically hear the kid’s pout over the phone.

Awwww… baby’s first attempt at manipulation!

“Sure, bud. Next time you’re having a good day, you, me, and Idia-senpai can go to an arcade or something,” Yuu said.

“Promise?” Ortho said, sniffling.

Yuu smiled. “Promise. Now, tell me about your day. What games did you play? They better have been appropriate.”

“Well…” Ortho said, which was not a good sign.

“Maybe I’ll drop by sooner than expected,” Yuu muttered. “Need to punch some sense into him.”

Ortho giggled, and Yuu smiled, and Yuu spent the rest of the day listening to the younger Shroud brother talk about the new fighting game Idia had introduced him to.

(It was definitely not appropriate for children, and Yuu was going to grab Idia by the shoulders and shake him the next time he happened to catch sight of that damn otaku.)

By the time dinner rolled around, Grim was visibly sulking on Yuu’s bed, glaring at him with his head in his paws.

“Awwww, are you jealous?” Yuu teased, walking over and scratching the cat behind the ears. “Don’t worry, you’re my favorite.”

Grim narrowed his eye at him, but eventually caved, leaning into Yuu’s hand with a soft meow.

Yuu smiled and pressed a kiss to the top of his head. “Cute.”

And, so, life went on. Grim continued to survive despite all odds, and Yuu continued to take care of him.

He could admit that he was getting a little attached.

But, really, who wouldn’t fall in love with an adorable little cat when they’d been taking care of it for almost a month?

It was at the one-month mark that Yuu felt the bed next to him shift and peeked an eye open sleepily.

The cat was right in front of his face.

It settled down, slowly, on his pillow and started to purr.

Yuu grimaced a little, internally. He really didn’t want to risk rolling over in his sleep and crushing Grim, but… Grim wouldn’t understand if he tried to tell him that. He would just assume that Yuu was rejecting him, and Yuu wasn’t going to do that right when Grim was opening up.

He scooped up the cat and hugged Grim to his chest.

Grim purred quietly, kneading biscuits into the fabric of Yuu’s sleep shirt.

Yuu smiled faintly, pressing a kiss to the cat’s forehead and settling in for a probably-terrible night’s sleep.

Winter Break was coming to an end, anyway, he needed to get used to Not Sleeping again. It’d suck less when school started, that way.

His masterful planning for the future did nothing for him.

It was time for the first day of school, and his alarm was blaring, and Yuu was glaring at the ceiling. Grim hissed at Yuu’s phone. This did not help his mood.

He, silently, counted to ten.

He failed to count to ten because he was too busy seething at the fact that he had to go to fucking school. And he had to wake up extra early to physically drag Idia to class, because Idia was an awful human being who refused to attend class if Yuu didn’t make him.

Yuu rolled out of bed. Failed to land on his own two feet. Hit the ground in a series of dull thuds.

He was going to kill someone.

Maybe he understood Americans, after all.

He ran his fingers through his hair, exasperated.

And then he started getting ready.

It was harder than it should be. Grim was still on edge, it seemed, thanks to the alarm, and was winding around Yuu’s legs, meowing frantically at him.

Yuu flashed a smile. “It’s fine, baby, it’s just school.”

Grim didn’t understand. Because Grim was a cat.

Yuu knelt to press a quick kiss to Grim’s forehead. “I’ll be back in a few hours.”

Grim, of course, continued to panic.

And, while it ached Yuu to leave Grim alone while he was panicking, Yuu couldn’t just stay. He had a life to live, school to attend, a stubborn senpai to drag to class.

Grim would realize, when Yuu came home, that it would all be fine.

But in order for Grim to realize this, Yuu had to leave in the first place.

He set Grim in the bathroom, and then headed off.

Idia's house was, thankfully, only a short walk from his apartment. As one would expect, seeing as they went to the same school.

He rang the doorbell.

Idia opened the door in his pajamas.

"... senpai."

"I forgot there was school today," Idia lied through his teeth.

Yuu sighed and brushed past Idia, into the house. "Go get changed. I'll wait."

Idia grumbled about how this was a crime against NEETs. Nevermind that the guy wasn't definitionally a NEET, considering he was both employed and in school. Yuu was, apparently, evil and discriminatory.

Idia walked in a few minutes later, reluctantly. His bright blue hair (Ortho had asked him to dye it, and Idia never said no to his brother) was a mess, and that huge hoodie was not up to their dress code, but Yuu was going to take what he could get.

Yuu glanced behind Idia, at the empty hallway. Usually, Ortho would come and say 'hi'...

“... bad day?”

“Yeah,” Idia said, his smile a hair awkward. “I think there’s time to go check on him, if you want.”

Yuu hummed, glancing at the time. It’d be close… but, really, their teachers wouldn’t care. They got top grades, consistently. Their school wasn’t going to risk pissing them off, not over small things like tardiness or attendance, lest they transfer to a different school.

He stepped past Idia, walking further into the familiar flat. It smelled sterile, like a hospital room. Yuu had never figured out whether that was because Idia’s parents were both doctors and therefore carried the scent home with them, or if they simply sterilized the place for Ortho’s sake. Perhaps both.

He knocked, lightly, on a door.

And then let himself in.

Ortho was in bed, curled around a giant plushie. Yuu, vaguely, recognized it as a character from that one Disney movie Ortho watched religiously, but he couldn’t put a name to it.

Yuu kept his eyes on Ortho. He hated looking at the medical equipment by the kid’s bed.

Ortho sat up, slightly, and flashed a weak smile Yuu’s way.

Yuu hesitated.

He looked at Idia. “... want to attend class virtually today?”

Idia grinned. Yuu strongly suspected that Idia had been planning this. But he wasn’t so petty that he’d make Ortho miserable just to spite Idia.

(And it wasn’t like he loved attending school, anyway.)

“I’ll get a spare computer for you.”

True to his word, Idia came back bearing two computers.

… and two Switches.

Yuu sighed. “If you keep skipping class, they’ll hold you back, senpai.”

“If I get held back then we get to go to the same school for an extra year,” Idia said.

Yuu narrowed his eyes.

“You know they’d never hold me back, anyway.”

He shook his head, exasperated, but took a seat beside Ortho and booted up the Switch. “Any requests?”

Ortho shifted to rest his head on Yuu’s lap. “The one Nii-san sucks at.”

Yuu snorted. Idia gasped in mock offense.

“You like him more than me!” Idia accused.

Ortho nodded his agreement.

Now Idia looked like he might actually be offended.

“You just don’t know what Shimura-san 's actually like,” Idia sighed. “He’s a handful. He’s lucky he has such a competent senpai taking care of him.”

Yuu rolled his eyes. “You’re not gonna be my senpai for much longer, at this rate.”

Idia smirked. “Even if I did get held back two years, you’d probably still call me ‘senpai’.”

Yuu considered this. “I don’t know what I’d call you. Idia-san?”

A shiver of disgust ran through the two teens.

“You can’t be held back,” Yuu said, seriously.

Idia nodded, putting his hand out.

Yuu shook it.

And then they started playing video games instead of paying attention to their online lectures.

(At least Ortho seemed to enjoy watching them try to ruin each other’s games.)

A few days into the school year, Yuu was confronted by his parents:

“You have a new 'pet project', don’t you?” his dad asked, mildly exasperated.

Yuu blinked a few times, and then shook his head. “No…?”

“The Howl family says that their dog has gone missing,” his dad said, throwing an accusatory glance Yuu’s way. As if he had something to do with it.

Which was fair enough, honestly. He’d picked up a lot of animals over the years, but he hadn’t picked up a dog recently. And, assuming the Howl family had a collar on their dog, he would have given it back to them the moment he realized the dog had a proper home.

Now, he could point this out. However. He was much more interested in being petty.

Yuu crossed his arms over his chest. “And why does the – I forgot their name.”

“Howl.”

“Right! Why does the Howl family get to have a pet and we don’t?”

“If they want to risk getting kicked out of their apartment, then that is their own decision.”

“But, dad, you don’t understand. We could have mutually assured destruction.”

“Tempting,” his dad said, dryly.

Before Yuu could convince him (because surely his father was only a few more sentences away from caving, look at those positive responses!), his mom came in bearing dinner.

“Thanks, momma.”

She pressed a quick kiss to his temple, before collapsing in her chair. “You will not believe what I had to go through today.”

Yuu tipped his head to the side. “It was a meeting, right?”

“Yes,” his mother said. “My coworkers are so…”

She made a squeezing motion with her hands.

Yuu nodded along like he understood. Maybe he did. There were certainly days where Idia was extra annoying.

He was quick to excuse himself from dinner.

The second he closed the door to his room, he allowed a grin to steal its way across his face.

They had confronted him about the wrong animal.

Oh, he was so in the clear.

This cat was his.

There were a few problems with that, though.

It became clear after a solid week and a half of leaving and coming back that Grim was not getting used to Yuu’s need to go to school.

Grim had separation anxiety. Or trauma. Or both.

Yuu knelt in front of his beloved cat. “I’ll be back in a few hours. You’ll probably sleep through it, anyway.”

Grim continued to look betrayed.

He pressed a kiss to his forehead. “I’m sorry, bud, I don’t have a choice. Gotta go to class, y’know?”

Grim did not know. Because Grim was a cat.

Grim tugged at Yuu’s pant leg, meowing sadly.

While the cat wasn’t getting used to Yuu leaving, Yuu was getting used to the daily routine of ‘wake up, get ready, console cat, leave’. It was getting steadily easier to close the door in the cat’s mournful face.

It still sucked, don’t get him wrong. Yuu wanted to be a vet for a reason – he hated seeing animals in needless pain. But, sometimes, there really isn’t anything you can do.

So, he gently nudged Grim out of the way with his foot to make sure his whiskers couldn’t get caught in the door, and then started off toward Idia’s house.

Yuu’s growing apathy, in hindsight, probably wasn’t helping things on Grim’s end.

He stared at the thin trail of blood on his floor, his stomach flipping.

“Grim?” he called, setting his backpack on the door handle just to make sure that he wouldn’t somehow throw the thing and hit his apparently already injured cat. “Where are you, baby?”

He found the cat curled up in his bathroom. One of Grim’s legs had been twisted at a strange angle.

Now, Yuu wasn’t stupid. He knew that this injury was, probably, self-inflicted. There was nothing Grim could do in Yuu’s room that would end in him getting injured, especially not to this extent.

Animals are simple creatures. But they can still recognize patterns.

Yuu had taken Grim in because he was hurt. And, now that Grim was getting better, Yuu was suddenly fine leaving him alone for hours at a time.

It didn’t matter if that wasn’t actually why Yuu was leaving. That Yuu would be happy to take care of Grim full-time, if only he didn't have so many pesky responsibilities. He couldn’t communicate that to Grim in a way the cat would understand.

So, what could he do? Continue going to school? What if his behavior got worse in his desperation to get Yuu to notice him?

He pinched the bridge of his nose.

Fine. He’d take Grim to school with him. It’d been a while since he’d taken a pet to class, maybe no one would notice.

Idia noticed immediately.

“... you have an animal with you, don’t you?”

Yuu frowned. “What makes you think that?”

“Because of the way you’re holding your backpack,” Idia said. “You’re being too careful with it.”

Ah. This must be what people were talking about when they said ‘the morbid ordeal of being known’.

Yuu glared at him.

“You're a terrible actor. Now, let me see our son,” Idia joked.

“He’s not exactly photogenic, senpai. I took him in for a reason,” Yuu warned.

Idia waved off his concern.

It was with great reluctance that Yuu complied. He unzipped his backpack, and Idia leaned in close to see.

Idia stared at Grim. Grim stared at Idia.

A lot of expressions flicked over his senpai’s face.

“... why is he green?” Idia asked, eventually.

Yuu shrugged. “The internet said that it’s probably chemical exposure.”

“You’ve had him for, like, a month, though,” Idia said, his arms crossed over his chest, his expression troubled. “That should have started fading by now.”

That was a good point.

Yuu’s lips pressed into a thin line. “I dunno. He’s a weird case… for a lot of reasons. Think your parents would know anything about it?”

“They’re human doctors,” Idia sighed. “But, if you leave him with me, I can try showing him to them.”

Yuu hesitated. “I dunno, he’s pretty anxious when I’m not there.”

Idia worried his lip. “He could be contagious.”

“Then I don’t want him around Ortho-chan.”

“Shimura.”

Yuu didn’t know what to make of Idia's expression. He didn’t think he’d ever seen his senpai quite so serious.

A hand settled on his shoulder. “Just – listen to me – you really need to – fuck!”

Grim tried to snap at Idia’s hand, and it was only thanks to years of QTEs that Idia was able to move out of the way in time.

Yuu frowned down at Grim.

Who was glaring at Idia… and Yuu, too? Idia, Yuu could understand. Grim didn’t know him. But Yuu wasn’t sure what he was doing wrong… maybe Grim wasn’t comfortable in Yuu’s backpack. But it wasn’t like Yuu could openly carry him to class.

Or maybe Grim was just jealous and didn’t like someone else touching Yuu.

Yuu, frankly, had no idea. Grim had never lashed out like this before.

“I don’t think I can leave him with you,” Yuu muttered, scratching Grim behind the ears to calm him down.

Grim glanced at Idia. If Yuu didn't know better, he'd say the cat looked kind of smug.

Idia’s eyes narrowed, before he crossed his arms over his chest. Perhaps to protect his hands from Grim’s wrath.

“Fine, fine. It’s… probably not pressing, anyway, if he’s been like this for over a month already.”

They didn’t get much longer to talk about it, because their school came into view and Yuu had to stuff Grim out of sight. Idia promised to take Yuu out to an arcade that weekend, and Yuu had readily agreed. And then they went their separate ways.

They weren’t in the same class, after all.

Maybe, if they were, Idia could have helped him hide Grim.

Unfortunately for Yuu, he wasn’t quite capable of keeping his teachers from realizing that Yuu was harboring a fugitive. Not for long.

Grim had been quiet. But, alas, one of his classmates noticed Yuu’s backpack shifting every once in a while.

The bad part of being a ‘smart kid’ was that his class was made up almost entirely of fucking teacher's pets.

He was sent home.

It wasn’t this that made anxiety crawl up his throat.

No, it was because Yuu knew that the school was going to call his parents.

His time with Grim was about to come to a very abrupt end.

… dinner that night was awkward. No one wanted to bring it up, but the longer they went without saying anything the more tense things got.

“Bring it here,” his father said, finally, setting down his chopsticks.

Yuu, reluctantly, walked to his room and scooped Grim up, off the bed.

He presented his beloved cat to his parents.

His parents exchanged glances.

“Yuu, we can’t let you keep him,” his mom said. Not quite gentle, but considering this wasn’t the first time Yuu’d done this (nor would it be the last, he was sure), he wasn’t surprised that a little bit of frustration was leaking into her tone. “If he’s found, we’ll be kicked out.”

“He’s going to die soon, anyway,” Yuu said, hugging his cat closer to his chest. “He deserves a loving home until then.”

Grim was growling lowly. He, of course, couldn’t understand what they were saying, but even a cat could not miss the growing hostility in the room.

“It’s not that simple,” his father said.

Yuu worried his lip. He wasn’t stupid. Of course, he knew that things weren’t going to be that easy. But this was his cat, now. He’d named him, taken care of him for over a month. He wasn’t going to give up on Grim now –.

“We can let you be there, when they put him to sleep,” his mother offered.

“He’s getting better,” Yuu blurted. “Just – I can’t – what if –?”

“I thought he was ‘going to die soon, anyway’,” his father said.

Yuu’s eyes flicked to the side.

“Yuu… don’t make this harder than it has to be,” his father said, reaching out and gently tugging on one of his arms, trying to loosen his grip on the cat.

Grim sunk his teeth into his father’s hand.

His father jerked back in surprise. “Is the thing fer –?!”

He didn’t finish his sentence.

It wasn’t even the kind of slow trail-off that came when someone was distracted. It was sudden, as if his father had realized something mid-sentence.

Yuu peeked up to find his father standing there, completely motionless. A blank look on his face.

His skin was tinted green.

His mom looked just as confused by the development as Yuu was.

At some point, he had dropped Grim. Or maybe the cat had simply jumped out of his arms.

Yuu glanced down to look for him.

Only for his eyes to shoot right back up when his mother gave a strangled scream.

His father was tearing his mom’s throat out with his teeth.

Yuu fell out of his chair, barely even registering the pain flaring in his elbows. He scrambled away from – his dad was going insane, clearly, he needed –.

He fumbled his phone out of his pocket. The screen had cracked during his fall, but it still lit up when he clicked it on. Shaky hands rushed through calling the police, and he dragged his phone to his ear.

“Hello?” the person on the other side of the line said, sounding painfully bored.

“It’s – my dad – he’s… he’s gone insane – he’s eating her!” Yuu stammered, his eyes flicking around desperately for some kind of weapon. He could see the knife block, on a nearby counter, but could he really stab his own dad?

“He’s – what?” the receptionist said, flabbergasted.

If Yuu could breathe, he might have laughed.

His dad’s head turned to look at him, and Yuu swore he could feel his heart stop.

“Hello? Sir?” the person on the other end of the line asked.

Slowly, his father crawled off of his mom, still laying limp on the floor.

Awkward limbs that didn’t seem to move quite right, hands and feet that seemed unsure on the ground. His mouth was caked in blood. There was something stuck between his teeth. Glassy eyes stared at Yuu in a way that made him feel sick, because his father might have been one to enjoy dry humor, but he had never looked quite so empty before.

Yuu grabbed the overturned chair, holding it like some kind of shield as his – the something crawled toward him.

And then his mother started to move, too. Flopping over onto her stomach. Slowly rising, using the nearby counter to push herself up, like a toddler just learning the ropes of being a human.

Her neck was still bleeding sluggishly.

“Y-Yuu,” the thing inside his father said.

His mother made a gurgling sound, as if in agreement.

Yuu’s back hit the wall.

The things clearly weren’t used to their bodies. Could he make a break for it?

But Grim was still around somewhere, wasn’t he? He was supposed to protect the cat… but the cat had done this, hadn’t he?

He didn’t get enough time to think it over, because his mother lunged toward him.

Yuu hit her with the chair.

The chair shattered upon impact.

It didn’t even seem to register the pain.

It fell on top of him, taking his face into its clumsy hands, swiping its thumbs beneath his eyes. No amount of shoving at its chest was deterring it. It forced his head back.

Yuu pressed back further into the wall, trying to delay the inevitable.

He felt it tuck its head into the crook of his neck.

Yuu went very still.

Was it messing with him? Why was it not killing him?

His father’s body reached him, then, wrapping around one of his legs, clinging to him.

Yuu couldn’t move. Shouldn’t move. It didn’t seem aware that he was still alive. Maybe it was going by T-Rex rules! Maybe he was fine so long as they just forgot he wasn’t some really human-esque furniture!

Lips pressed against his neck.

It was short. A chaste peck.

Yuu retched and jerked away, tripping over his father’s body in his haste.

He was back on his feet in seconds, his heart pounding in his chest in time with his footsteps as he made a mad dash for his room.

His phone –.

Was a lost cause, tucked behind the thing inhabiting his father.

He slammed his bedroom door shut behind him, pressing back against it to keep it from opening, even as the monsters on the other side banged their fists against the wood.

He wouldn’t be able to keep them out for long. It was two fully-grown adults versus one scrawny teenager. His odds were terrible even if the two of them could die. Which, considering his mom had had her throat torn open, only to continue on as if nothing was amiss, he wasn’t sure they could.

So, they’d come in and get him and he’d become one of them and –.

His cat stood in the center of the room. Green fur glistened in the sunlight streaming through the windows. Its mouth was still dripping with his father’s blood.

Yuu’s breath caught in his throat.

It got closer and closer, and there was nothing Yuu could do. If he moved away from the door, then they would be able to get in. And they would have no trouble pinning him down, at least not in comparison to a cat. He could always just punt the thing, maybe.

It would only buy him a few seconds at most, and he wasn't sure making it mad was a good idea.

Blood dripped onto his shoe.

The anxiety that had been creeping up the back of his throat finally made its way to the surface. Yuu doubled over, throwing up the breakfast bar he’d managed to get down that morning before running to school.

God, was that really just a few hours ago?

He felt a paw settle on the back of his hand.

His next heave was completely dry, more of a gag than anything.

Yuu’s arms trembled beneath him, and that was all of the warning he got before he collapsed against the floor, just barely managing to avoid the puddle of his own sick.

The things were still pounding against his door. His heart thudded in time with every knock. Dully, Yuu thought that the things must not know how to open doors.

Not that it mattered, when there was one so close to him.

He watched the thing approach him. Slowly, warily, as if it were scared he’d run away or attack it if it got too close too quickly.

It crept its way closer, stepping gingerly over one of his hands, making its way over to his chest.

Yuu squeezed his eyes shut tight.

It didn’t bite him.

It settled itself down on his chest and started to purr.

Yuu stared at it, watching it rise and fall with every quick, panicked breath.

Slowly, shakily, he lifted a hand to scratch it behind the ears.

It leaned into his touch.

#yearly post for my bdayyyyy #im 23 now. help. im old.#twisted wonderland #twst yuu #twst grim #idia shroud #ortho shroud #idiyuu (implied. one sided.)

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eddiesguitarskills · 1 year ago

Text

It Can't All Be Bullshit

Read part 2 here

Eddie Munson x fem Reader x Steve Harrington (unfortunately no steddie in this)

Summary: pinning after your best friend can be hard, especially when he doesn’t seem to like you back. You were trying to get over a crush the last thing you needed was another.

AN: this and the next chapter have been in my drafts for far too long so I thought I'd post them (not the best piece of writing but I like the story) I have tried to prove read it but I have dyslexia so sorry for any mistakes

Warnings: Angst, use of Y/n, mention of break ups, miscommunication, drug and alcohol use, swearing

Word count: about 2000 words

Halloween night 1985

Of all the people you had to have a crush on, why did it have to be your annoying, oblivious dork of a best friend? You knew you needed to get over it, and even if there ever was a chance of being with him, you feared you’d lose him. You weren’t what Eddie wanted in a girl, and you knew that. You were surprised he kept you around now with how much you nagged at him. It’s not like it was all the time, but someone had to look out for that boy, especially if he wasn’t going to do it for himself.

Eddie interrupted your plans for a Halloween movie night, which you had planned out for a month, costumes included. If anyone were to look at you together, they would assume you were a couple; most people did. You were dressed as Jack and Wendy Torrance from the shinning. He even let you put makeup on him to give him the frostbite effect. So when he suddenly announced he had to go to Tina’s party to deal, you were annoyed. You tried not to nag, even though you hated the sound of your voice at this point. Plus, he promised it would only be an hour tops, and then you could get takeout with some of his earnings so that you couldn’t complain, especially when he looked at you with those eyes. You could never say no.

You weren’t the biggest fan of drugs or him dealing them; you knew he was better than that life. But you understood how hard things were on him and his uncle, so as long as it wasn’t forever, it wasn’t really bad drugs, you let it be. You never liked to be around when he dealt, though. Something about watching it made you feel weird. You could never explain why. Eddie was kind, though, and he never did anything in front of you. He didn’t even smoke weed, especially after that one time when he got super paranoid and scared you. You weren’t part of that life. You didn’t do drugs, you didn’t drink, and you didn’t party. It’s not that you were boring. It was just never you. Hey, maybe you were boring, but at least you didn't need drugs to enjoy yourself. You liked to be in control.

You are currently leaning against the countertop in the kitchen, sticking out like a sore thumb with a Coke in your hand. You look at the clock, he’s 30 minutes late. You were trying to turn a new leaf, so you were trying to be understanding, even if his time-wasting was cutting into your Halloween plans. You couldn’t take your eyes off the clock, not like there were other things to watch at this party: teenagers making out, getting too drunk or being sick. The clock seemed more appealing. When it hit the 2-hour mark, you started worrying, so you looked for him. What you didn’t expect to find was him in the garden with a blunt in his hand and his other hand on a blonde’s thigh.

The voice in your head telling you not to nag was now becoming quieter with how annoyed you were. He ditched you, and he was smoking, which showed he had no intention of continuing your plans. He just wanted to get high and laid. “Eddie!” you said loud and stern enough for him to hear you, but too high he was in his bubble with his girl for the night. “Edward Munson!” you said louder; he only ever hears that name when in trouble, so subconsciously, he straightened his back and tried to hide the blunt, failing miserably. He turned around to face you, he waved “Hi darling”. You glared at him. “Are you high, darling?” a mocking tone coming from your voice, using his usual pet name for you against him.

He pitched his fingers together “a little”. Eddie always thought you looked cute when you were mad; he usually tried to get you a little angry so he could see that face. Usually, though, he could hide his smile and keep a straight face since he was sober. But now, when he tried to keep a straight face, he couldn’t; even more irritating for you, he couldn't stop giggling, making the girl to his right giggle, too. “If you wanted to go party instead, you should have told me; you didn’t need to lie”. If Eddie were sober, he would see how hurt you were, but in his mind, this was a joke, “you don’t have to stay. You can go home and watch the films. Tell me what happens”. You freeze; this is why you hated High Eddie; he never realised how hurtful he came across. How selfish he became. And when he finally sobers up enough to realise you must forgive him because he ‘wasn’t in his right mind’. It’s a frustrating cycle, which is why he stopped smoking in front of you. Except for now, apparently. That’s probably why he ditched you so that you wouldn’t find out.

Hurtful words were on your tongue, but you were in your right mind, so you could never say them. You knew you wouldn’t mean them. You were just hurt, so you stormed off straight out the front door, but when you made it to the front porch, it was like you were stuck in glue. You couldn’t leave whether he was being a dick or not. He was still your best friend, and you need to ensure he was safe. He shouldn’t drive high, and knowing him, he would try. So you waited. You couldn’t go back into the hell hole that was Tina’s Halloween party, so you waited on a porch swing. The air was bitter tonight, so you were glad your costume provided a jumper, not that it looked like a costume anymore without a partner to go with it.

Your eyes were drifting shut with how tired and bored you were, that was until you heard a huge slam come from beside you, making you flinch. You weren’t the only one having a terrible time at this party; Steve was having an even worse one. “You got cigarettes?”. He didn’t look at you, so you didn’t realise he was talking to you. That was until you felt his glare burning into you. You knew that look wasn’t meant for you, but it still made you feel uncomfortable. Maybe it was due to the shots you could tell he had taken from the blue tint to his lips, or perhaps he had gotten into a fight. But this look wasn’t meant for you, but it didn't make it any less scary when you were in his firing line. “Huh?”. With the way he spoke to you next, you could have sworn you had done something to hurt his feelings. “Are you deaf I said do you have any smokes?” he spoke slowly like you were a dumb child. He tutted at you and turned away from you “bullshit”. He kept repeating like a madman.

Jesus, was he that addicted to nicotine, you thought. Even if he did make you feel a little uncomfortable, especially since you knew he was a jock, and even though they didn’t necessarily pick on you because, in their words, “you were a girl,” they bullied your friends so you knew how bad they could be. But even for a jock, this was dramatic “fucking hell, I’m sorry, I don’t have any” you said a little sarcastically. He stopped his repetition and looked over his shoulder at you. “What?” He said with anger still laced in his voice, like you did anything to deserve his rage. You didn’t know why you were wasting your breath on him, but Eddie had pissed you off, and you needed to get the annoyance out somehow. “Are you deaf? I said I’m sorry, I don’t have any”.

He thought he knew girls well, but after tonight, he wasn’t sure, and he didn’t want to figure out what was wrong with you either. He couldn’t be bothered by the grief. “Fuck off”. You couldn’t tell if his words were in reaction to what you said or if he meant it. That was until he repeated it, and you saw the look on his face, and the tears in his eyes that he didn’t realise were there. You didn’t know what was happening with him, but it was not your place to sort it. You were making it worse.

So you went back into the party, to look for two people, firstly Tommy Hagan everyone knew he was Harrington’s best friend, so even if you didn’t like Tommy you couldn’t leave someone when they were like that. It would only make you as bad as them. You found him around the beer pong table. You lightly tapped his shoulder as you couldn’t deal with another boy's wrath tonight. He turned around, looking you up and down, smirking. “What are you supposed to be a virgin?” You rolled your eyes. You knew you could think of a comeback and put him in his place, but now wasn’t the time; you needed to get him outside, and you didn’t want to announce that his friend, the king of Hawkin High, was crying on the lawn in front of everyone. You weren't cruel. “Can you just come outside with me?” The room erupted into “oh”, as if you were suggesting something sexual. “Wait, was I right about the virgin thing? Is the freak not giving you any? Do you want a real man instead?” He said, getting closer to you. He smelt of beer and body odour, but you let him closer so you could whisper in his ear. “Your boy is outside, and something’s happened. I’d go and sort it if I was you”. He looked at you confused and nodded. He walked out, but not before smacking you on the ass. “I’ll see you later, darling?”. God, he was the most enormous prick. You couldn’t hold your tongue anymore. “Is that with your girlfriend or alone?”.

Eddie came sauntering alone into the room after hearing your voice, “I hope you’re not starting fights”, he said, putting his arm around your shoulder out of comfort. You ignored his question, not wanting to get into it now. “You ready to go?” You looked at him and weakly smiled. Eddie couldn’t tell, though he was still high as a kite, just in the mellow stage, so all he could see was you smiling. You took the keys out of his pocket and led him to the van. On your way out, you walked past Tommy and Steve on the porch swing. Steve’s leg bounced. “She said we were bullshit”, he kept repeating; you were glad Eddie wasn’t sober enough to hear it. Otherwise, he would definitely use it against him. Everything about his mood towards you started to make sense. He and Nancy had clearly broken up. So you gave him a smile and a nod of acknowledgement as you left, which he only glared at. You didn't mind, though you were just glad he wasn’t alone, even if that meant being with Tommy.

You drove Eddie home, struggling to get his dead weight onto the bed and to get his shoes off. You were about to leave for your car outside when Eddie's hand grabbed for yours. “Stay”. This used to be one of the only things you liked about him being high, the cuddles and needing attention. However, right now, this was probably the worst thing for your heart when you were trying to get over him, but when you looked at his face, how could you say no if that made him happy, even if it would end up hurting you.

Let me know if you wanna be tagged in the future

Masterlist here if you are interested

#eddie munson angst #steve harrington angst #steve harrington fanfic #eddie fanfic #eddie munson fanfic #eddie munson #steve harrington #eddie munson x reader #steve harrington x reader #stranger things angst

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