#maybe then Nancy would try to talk to Mike about how he’s feeling

[cloudycleric]

mike wheeler is actually so gay. thinking about this on my s1 rewatch today. things between him & el weren't even remotely romantic until lucas brought it up. everything he knows about girls or a romantic relationship with a girl doesn't come naturally to him & he basically has to ask for advice whenever he has relationship issues.

in st4 he didn't even sign the letters "love, mike" which is absolutely crazy how we just brushed over that. it's not like he's el & might not know to sign letters with "love" yet he doesn't do it anyway. legit writing "love, [name]" was the first way i ever learned to sign a letter. & adding onto that EL EVEN KNOWS TO SIGN WITH "LOVE". ???

it baffles me how people like,,,, don't pick up on all this. legitimately. ALL of the other couples in stranger things paired together normally or had the relationship come normally, & when there's issues between the two, they can solve it without outsourcing for help all the time. because they truly understand the other person as well as the type of relationship they are in.

max & lucas? fell in love pretty naturally in a way that flowed & didn't feel forced. they are also portrayed in s3 to have "more" issues than el & mike, yet lucas always wins max back, & knows exactly how to. jonathan & nancy? not forced at all, came together naturally. when they have relationship issues, they understand each other enough & trust each other enough to get through it.

mike & el aren't the same way. they get along just fine, until they relationship turns romantic in some way. think about it--when el dumped mike's ass, sure they didn't talk for awhile, but they seemed to share a genuine connection of friendship. when they are in a relationship, everything seems strained.

i think i talked about maybe a year back about how el & mike were even showcased to be actively bringing out the worst in each other, especially in s3. this can be seen in s4 as well at rink-o-mania especially, when el portrays her whole life in california as a lie. they always seem to work better together when there isn't a romantic connotation on their relationship (all of the beginning of s1, until the bathtub).

all this to say that byler endgame, cause i was sitting last night listening to sad mgmt songs & trying not to think about the election & i just kept thinking about how mike & will were built for each other, like it would be so cruel for him to be friendzoned by the person he's loved for years, & yelled for whenever he was in the upside down. breaks my heart.

since that's such a shitty ending for him, & we know that will DOES have a happy ending, i don't see how in anyway byler doesn't end up together.

[nfr-girly]

Eddie Munson x reader // possible Steve x reader

:: angst + fluff jealous eddie <3

:: masterlist ♡︎ divider by @chachachannah

Chrissy had been hanging out at hellfire club for a few weeks now, you first introduced her and Nancy to them when Mike and Dustin joined the club. You weren’t apart of the club yourself, but you and Eddie had been friends for years, so he let you hang out there every so often.

You, Nancy, robin and Chrissy were closer than ever. Robin introduced you to Nancy, and you introduced them to Chrissy. You couldn’t go anywhere without eachother, you knew you could always rely on them. Which is why you felt super guilty about how you were feeling these past couple of weeks.

It was no secret you felt things for Eddie. How could you not? He was a confident rockstar, with loads of tattoos and long curly hair. Anyone with a brain would’ve fell for him

Ever since Chrissy and Eddie were first introduced, Eddie always stayed super close to her at hellfire, she would ask him questions about the game and he would guide her through it, you’d always see the two make small jokes between themselves. You loved chrissy, and you could never blame her for trying to make friends, but all you could think as you watched the two were how you wish that was you.

You and Eddie were good friends, but you knew you two would never be anything more than that, you always thought he’d prefer someone like him, or you thought that until Chrissy. They were complete opposites. She was the popular, nice cheerleader; and he was a rockstar who played guitar, and mostly wore black. But of course he liked Chrissy, everyone did! She was the best, how could they not?

After hellfire you and Chrissy walked to her car and talked, you asked her, “how did you find it?”

“I really liked it!! Everyone’s so welcoming especially Eddie, he helped me a lot” she replied

You nod slowly, curious you ask, “what did you guys talk about? I heard you laughing a lot”

“Oh well he talked about his hobbies he’s got, and asked me about some stories from cheerleading.”

“Oh, well it’s good you have another friend in the club, aside from yours truly” I nudge her and she laughs

I try to keep a positive attitude upon hearing about her new friendship with Eddie. But inside I can’t help but feeling all sorts.

*a few weeks pass*

The more hellfire met up, the closer Eddie and Chrissy got, it made you insane, you felt so guilty feeling this as they were both your friends, and Eddie didn’t belong to you.

Now you were walking towards Chrissy’s car, you had a shift at the video store with Steve, but you didn’t have a car yourself yet, so you had to rely on either Robin or Chrissy.

You waved at Chrissy as you approached her car and she waved back, unlocking the door for you.

You get in and hug her, “thank you so much for taking me, I still need to wait two months then I’ll have my license.”

“Don’t worry about it! The stores on the way to my house anyway”

You two start heading to the store and make conversation, until she mentions something about Eddie.

“Eddie also asked me if I wanted to go to the cinema with him”

Your heart dropped, they were going on a date? Maybe it wasn’t a ‘date’ but still.

“Oh that’s nice of him, what are you going to see?”

“We’re going to see pretty in pink! I know it doesn’t seem like his type of film, but he let me choose, and I’m hoping to expand his knowledge for movies”

“That’s good! But watch out for him falling asleep” You joke, hoping she doesn’t catch your sudden change in mood.

We get to the video store and you say bye to her, as you head to the door you think about her and Eddie, thinking of all possible outcomes of their ‘date’. Will he confess his feelings for her? Will she say yes? Will they announce their relationship at the next hellfire meeting?

Your mood has turned upside down, it’s obvious something’s up with you.

You get to the desk and meet Steve, you say hi to him and change into your uniform, as you come out the bathroom, he pipes up.

“Who shit in your coffee?”

“What?” You say

“You look depressed as hell”

“No- I’m okay, just got a bit on my mind”

“You can tell me, it’s a slow day today so anything’s better than standing here all day”

You hesitated telling him, but Steve had an idea about your feelings for Eddie anyway, so you thought why not?

“You know Eddie..” you turned around hoped he’d catch on

Steve raised his eyebrows and immediately grabbed a seat for you and him, knowing you were about to go on a rant

You chuckled before sitting down

“Well him and Chrissy have been getting close recently, and he asked her to go see pretty in pink at the movies”

Steve nodded, knowing your feelings for Eddie, that must’ve hurt

“Don’t get me wrong I know me and him aren’t a thing, it just feels shitty”

“Yeah I know. Listen why don’t you and me hang out tomorrow? I’ll pick you up after school and we can go to star court, we’ll go roller skating and eat some ice cream, whatever you want”

You lifted your head to look at Steve, you felt so grateful for him as a friend

“Really? Are you busy though?”

“Nah, I haven’t got much going on right now so I’m free pretty much anytime. Cmon, it’ll be fun”

Maybe hanging out with someone else would get your mind off of Eddie? You didn’t see why you and Steve couldn’t hang out

“Okay then, hellfires on tomorrow so if you pick me up at around 4, I’ll be waiting there, let me know when your at the front of the school”

“Oh do you want to finish hellfire first?” He asks

“No it’s okay. I could do with a break from seeing him and Chrissy all close”

He chuckles, “okay, 4 it is”

*the next day*

You spend the day waiting for the final bell to ring so you can finally hang out with Steve, you and Steve haven’t hung out in a while, so you’re looking forward to today.

You and robin head to her locker to get her things for the last lesson, maths.

“Hey me and Steve are going to star court to roller skate, wanna come with?” You ask her

“Sorry i would but me and vickie are going bowling tonight”

“Oh yeah, you and vickieeee” you nudge her

“Shut up, we’re just friends” she laughs

“Yeah right, you know she likes you back why don’t you just ask her out already?”

“We’re just taking things slow, besides I don’t see you asking out Eddie anytime soon”

You playfully slap her arm as she laughs

“Shut up! I doubt that’s gonna happen, see how close him and Chrissy are now?”

“They’re probably just friends, besides you and Eddie have known each other so much longer”

“I know, but it just sucks. I love Chrissy don’t get me wrong, but he hasn’t been like this with any girl he knows”

“Just wait a bit, maybe it’ll die down?”

“Maybe”

You both head to maths and the period goes by slower than ever, then finally the bell rings and you and robin pack up

You part ways with her, wishing her good luck with vickie, as you head on your way to hellfire. You didn’t wanna see Chrissy and Eddie being all ‘lovey dovey’, but you were only gonna be there for 10 minutes before Steve came, so you didn’t mind

You got to hellfire and said hello to everyone, before Eddie came over to you.

“Hey Princess, haven’t seen you for a while, what you been up to?”

Eddie called you princess since middle school, it was just a nickname you gained after knowing him, you never thought anything of it until you started to gain feelings for him, now it gets your heart spinning whenever he says it.

“Not much, just been busy with schoolwork, anything going on with you?” You notice your tones colder than usual, you just hope he didn’t notice, he did

“Just been practicing a new song with the band, we got a few gigs with a bigger venue than usual” eddies band corroded coffin had been gaining a bit of popularity in the town with their new songs, you were proud of him, you just weren’t in the mood to show in right now

“That’s good, well I’ll see you at the table” you give him a small smile and head to talk to Dustin

Eddie looks at you, eyebrows furrowed, he knows something’s up with you, he just wants to know what.

10 minutes later they start the game, you tell them you’ll skip out on this one as you have to go in a minute, Chrissy isn’t here today so Eddie doesn’t stay close to her, instead he looks at you, a lot.

You hoped he didn’t notice your change in mood, but maybe he did?

All of a sudden the phone rings, “hello?” You say

“Hey, it’s Steve, I’m outside”

You smile, “I’ll see you in a minute” you end the call and gather your things

“I’ve got to go now, let me know who wins!” You begin to leave before Eddie pipes up

“Wait where are you going?” Eddie looks confused. Why weren’t you staying?

“I’m going to star court with Steve.”

Eddies face drops slightly

“Oh. Okay.”

You feel bad, Eddie looks kinda annoyed you’re ditching hellfire

“What are you guys doing there?” He asks, curious

“Well we’re gonna rollerskate, and probably get something to eat, maybe other stuff”

Eddie doesn’t want to even think about what ‘other stuff’ means, but he just shakes it off

“Kay, see you later”, Eddie looks down and continues setting up the game, the whole rooms silent as everyone can see eddies pissed.

“Well… I’ll get going now.” You walk away before things can get any more awkward.

You say bye to everyone else and walk towards Steve’s car.

He gets out to greet you and you wave

“Hey you ready to go?”

“Yeah, thanks for taking me out today, it could really help me”

“Of course, Eddie say anything when you mentioned you were hanging out wit me?”

You thought about eddies face, you couldn’t tell if he was mad you were ditching D&D or mad at something else, but you didn’t like it

“No, but he looked really annoyed at something, I don’t know” you get into his car without saying anything else, you end up missing Steve’s smirk.

*at starcourt*

“You’re gonna have to hold me I can barely skate” you laugh as you put on your skates

“Hey I’m not perfect either, we can both fall” Steve replies

You two get onto the rink and you almost immediately slip before Steve catches you

“Woah! Slow down, Jesus”

“Don’t you dare think about leaving me” you say as you link onto his arm

“Don’t worry. I won’t”

You two attempt to skate, a few falls here and there, mostly from you of course, but you two end up having loads of fun

You two go to bring back your skates and change into your shoes

“Wanna go to scoops? I have a friend who always gives me a small discount” he asks

“Okay, but I’m out of money”

“Don’t worry it’s on me”

You two head over to scoops and order your ice creams, you walk around the mall as you eat and talk

“So why exactly haven’t you told Eddie your feelings for him yet?” Steve asks you

“Why would I, he’s clearly not into me”

“You say that but you two have been friends since middle school, you’ve known each other that long and you’re gonna tell me he doesn’t like you like that?”

“Just because we’re friends doesn’t mean he likes me”

“Well he’s always been soft to you, and Eddie isn’t usually like that, he’s still not keen on me”

“He’ll warm up to you eventually” you say

You two decide to start heading home when you see a Photo Booth near the entrance

“Steve! Please can we take photos” you beg him

He laughs, “yeah sure, cmon”

You two get in the photo booth and take photos, you both exit the booth to look at the photos

One picture is you and Steve making a funny face, one is Steve with his arm over your shoulder, the other with your head on his shoulder.

You both take a copy and walk towards the car park.

You both hop in and Steve drives you home, you get to your house and he walks you to your door.

You hug him and say, “Thank you so much for today. I had loads of fun”

“Of course, we should do it more often, we don’t hang out enough considering we work together”you both laugh, he says bye to you and drives away

You go inside your house and smile, you managed to not think about Eddie once while you were with Steve.

*monday*

At lunch break, you head to your locker to sort it out before your next lesson, inside is a wall of photos you’ve collected with friends, a few of robin, Nancy and Chrissy, a group photo of hellfire, a photo of Eddie and you in middle school, and a photo of you two from a few months ago.

You realise you don’t have any of Steve, but you remember you have the photo from the Photo Booth inn your jacket. You take the photo out and decide to put it on the lockers wall. You grab a bit of bluetac, but before you hang it on someone approaches you.

“Hey princess” Eddie says behind you, making you jump

“Shit. You scared me” you chuckle before facing him

“What you doing?” He asks

“Just putting up a photo” you turn back to the locker to stick the bluetac on the back of the photo

“Who is it of?” He asks

“Steve and me”

You don’t see, but eddies smile drops

“Oh, from when you guys hung out?” His tone now serious

“Yeah, we went to a Photo Booth in Starcourt” you show him the picture, he eyes go to the picture of you having your head on his shoulder, and Eddie sees red.

“You guys are kinda close there” he points out

You notice his tone, but you ignore it. “Yeah, I thought it’d make a nice picture”

You hang up the picture next to the one of you and Eddie, which weirdly make eddies blood boil even more.

“So what’d you guys even talk about, aside from his ‘gel filled hair’ and his ‘good looks’” he does air quotes with his fingers as he says the words, his tone filled with something you can’t figure out

“What are you talking about?” You ask, starting to get a little annoyed

“Well the guys so obnoxious, I can’t imagine you guys had any fun with him talking about himself for the whole day”

You turned fully towards Eddie now, how could he talk about Steve like that?

“What the hell is wrong with you? Steve’s great and we had a really nice time yesterday just so you know. What are you jealous or something?” You ask with annoyance

Yeah. I am. The words hang on the tip of his tongue, but never come out.

“No. I just don’t think you should be hanging out with Mr. Everybody loves me” you start to walk away but Eddie follows you

“Yeah well I don’t see what my friendship with Steve has anything to do with you. Do you want me to butt in about you and Chrissy?” You say quickly, not even realising what you said

Eddie stops. What are you talking about?

“What do you mean, ‘you and Chrissy’ ?” He’s confused now, what did she have to do with this?

“Don’t act oblivious, I’ve seen the way you guys joke and laugh with each other, it’s fine it’s not got anything to do with me, but don’t go poking at my business with Steve when I could easily poke at your business with Chrissy”

You felt kind of bad talking about Chrissy like she wasn’t one of your best friends in the entire world, you didn’t feel hate towards her at all, you didn’t even feel hate towards Eddie. It was just all confusing.

“What ‘business’ with Chrissy? Last time I checked there was nothing going on between me and her”

“Really? You’re telling me the biggest rock lover I’ve ever met, who hates romcoms, agreed to go watch pretty in pink with the schools most popular cheerleader, just because he’s friends with her? Nothing more?”

“Yes. She wanted to get to know me better, so I suggested we go see a movie, I don’t see any problem with that”

You’re both now quiet, eventually you decide to give up. Eddies love life isn’t your business at the end of the day, all you could do now was rot in your room trying to get rid of your feelings for him.

“Okay, Fine. Do what you want. But you know Steve’s really great. You are too usually, when you’re not acting like an asshole.” You roll your eyes as you head over to your next class.

Eddie watches you as you leave, regret filling him as he goes over the words he said to you in his mind. He didn’t mean to make you mad, but what do you see in this guy? He’s been with loads of women before, how can you be sure he has good intentions.

*end of the school day*

As the day comes to an end Eddie makes it a mission to apologise to you, he felt like an idiot and didn’t mean to lash out at you. At the end of the day, Steve treats you well, and anyone who does is alright in his book. But why him?

What did Steve have that he didn’t? He had only known you for two years, eddies known you for almost all his life. He should be the one whose shoulder you have your head on. He should be the one taking you out for ice cream. He should be the one making you laugh.

Eddie goes and waits outside the school doors, remembering exactly where you go to after school

he lights up a cigarette, after a few minutes he hears your voice and looks behind him

You’re talking to robin as you two walk past him, he gets rid of his cigarette and walks towards you

“Heyyy ladies how are we” he puts one arm each on your guys shoulders

“What do you want?” You ask

“What I can’t say hello to you absolute rockstars?”

Robin looks to you and rolls her eyes, to which you laugh

“I’m gonna head home so I’ll see you guys monday” she smiled and heads off

“So princess you got anything planned tonight?”

“Eddie what are you doing?” You stop to turn to him

“Alright alright, I just wanted to say sorry for earlier, i just want you to be careful, you know better than I do that Harringtons an ass”

“He’s not, you just won’t bother to get to know him, but I’m not pissed at that, I’m pissed that you’ve been blatantly ignoring me for weeks and all of a sudden the moment you find out I have another guy friend you act like you own me?”

“I know I know, I don’t know why I acted like that, I just don’t want us to be weird with each-other. But, I didn’t realise you felt ignored, I’m sorry, me and Chrissy are just friends, and I promise I won’t make you feel like that again”

You look at Eddie, knowing he’s being sincere. “Thank you, and I’m sorry I shouldn’t be annoyed about you and Chrissy, I’m glad you two are friends”

Eddie stares at you, not even realising he was, but before anything else can be said, your name is heard

“Y/n!! You coming?” You both turn to find Steve in his car, ignoring everyone staring at where the noise came from

You give him a nod, but when you turn to Eddie he’s confused

“Oh, are you two hanging out?”

You respond, “oh no, he’s just dropping me off home”

Eddie nods slowly, “oh okay, well uh I’ll see you Monday then?”

You smile at him “see you Monday”

He watches as you walk away and get into Steve’s car, he doesn’t miss the way Steve stares daggers at him

He knows he’s fucked up. He wants to tell you that he thinks nothing of Chrissy. That they’re just friends. He didn’t even see you in that way before Steve came into the picture. he tells himself, which anyone can see is a big lie, because he’s liked you for years

He shifts himself from the spot he’s stood in, already thinking of ways to gain the confidence to tell you how he feels

eddies ending ⇦

steves ending ⇦

————————————————————————

thought I’d make different endings in case some thought reader should end up with Steve ♡︎

^pls let me know if you want to be added on the taglist for when both endings come out^

[gayofthefae]

Rewatching and just got to the roller rink fight. The whole thing is giving Mike rejecting Will before Will can reject him. He says they're just friends so Will doesn't. Just like "what did you think, really?" he honestly believes that Will believes what Mike is saying, so he says it for him.

To him, Will ignored him all day and maybe didn't wanna be friends anymore - certainly hadn't attempted to call back. He's fearing the same thing Nancy is with Jonathan.

He shoulder punches Will because he doesn't expect Will to hug him - he doesn't think they're still that close. He wasn't rejecting the hug, he just didn't catch it in time. He doesn't ignore Will, he just tries to distract himself with El and let Will initiate...but Will never does. He rolls his eyes and he mopes, but he doesn't talk to him.

And then he shifts. He gets angry that El was struggling and even that wasn't enough for for Will to call. And he puts all his anger, even if it wasn't about that, into that.

But then Will gets direct. He says "no, we're gonna talk about us and we're gonna talk about us now". And at first it's surprising because he sounds sad, like he wants them back. But then he's petty and angry himself too. And Mike thinks he's just trying to make the impending breakup happen now and he can't handle that. He wants to put it off.

He doesn't think Will is asking him questions or making requests about being ignored. He thinks he's giving him his reasons. So he puts it off. He shuts it down. And most importantly, he says what he thinks Will is going to before Will does.

He thinks they're breaking up. He doesn't think this is "let's fix our problems". He thinks this is placing blame.

So when Will looks sad at "friends", he doesn't know how to save it. So he just leaves. Leaving wasn't leaving to him. Both times: it was stalling.

He thought Will was gonna leave him so he stalled it, hoping he'd reach out. He didn't. Then his anger exploded and Will fired back - about why it was his fault their relationship was ending. He gave excuses he thought would work on Will, that he thought Will believed in, but they didn't. He realized he had been wrong. He hadn't lost Will already. But now he had.

The entire thing doesn't play like the truth is finally coming out, at least not on Mike's end. It plays like he just wants the conversation to be over. Like he's just trying desperately to prevent something from going too far.

He doesn't think he and Will are just friends any more than he genuinely thought Will was gay in season 3. He thinks that Will thinks they're just friends and Will suspects him. So he beats him to the punch.

It's the classic. It won't hurt as bad if he can tell himself Will never would have said those things if he hadn't interrupted him. The classic plausible deniability. *Their* classic self-sabotage.

"Maybe I feel like I lost you or something, does that make sense?"

Will thought Mike was telling him their relationship was already over. Mike thought Will was ending their relationship right then and there and trying desperately to put it off, because he felt he knew he couldn't prevent it.

[morganski-19]

Chills Right to the Marrow Part 55

ao3 link| part 1 . . . part 52, part 53, part 54

Dustin wakes up with a cold sweat, panting. The early morning sun making its way through the window. Illuminating his room. He blinks away visions of broken glass on his floor, the body of his cat. The truth that his mother can never know, the secret he keeps from her.

He’s jealous of the people that have someone else in their house to talk to about this. Mike has Nancy, Lucas has Erica, Will and El have their entire house. Steve has Eddie, and Robin considering how much she stays over there. He has no one.

Something pounces on his bed, startling him. Tews coming up to bump her head into his arm, purring.

“Jesus,” he jumps. She continues to rub against his arm until he starts to scratch around her collar. “Be glad you’re cute.”

He gets out of bed, heading to the kitchen. Tews following beside him, probably wanting food. He pulls out the container from the pantry and fills her bowl, watching as she goes to eat it. A different scene flashes in his mind when he blinks. He wishes he could ignore it.

“Dustin,” Claudia’s voice comes from the doorway. “She didn’t wake you up, did she?”

“No, I was already up. Just needed some water,” he lies. He hates that he has to lie, but it’s better for her.

Claudia squeezes his shoulder, moving toward the cabinets to get him a glass. Filling it before filling up the coffee pot. He takes the glass, sitting down at the kitchen table. Knowing that he isn’t going to be able to go back to sleep.

“You ok, Dusty,” his mom asks. Coming over to place the back of her hand against his forehead. “You haven’t been acting the same.”

Dustin wishes he could tell her. Wishes that she could really know what’s going on. So maybe she could help. Have some sort of answer so he doesn’t have to find one. Some way to make him feel like he used to. But she has the blessing of not knowing, he needed her to keep it.

“I’m fine,” he lies. Mind racing to think of a quick excuse. “Just tired.”

She makes the face, the all knowing mother face. Her lips pinching in the way that shows she knows he’s lying, but cares enough to say it gently. She sits down across from him. “You’ve been through so much these past few years. With Will going missing, then the fire at the mall, now the earthquake. Seeing your friends get hurt. And knowing you, you wanted to do everything to fix it, and feel bad because you can’t figure out how.

“You might think you’re hiding it from me, but you’re not. I saw you go to that hospital day after day to check up on them. I see you when you come home and the smile drops. See the pain in your eyes. I’ve tried to be here for you in the ways that I can, but I’m not sure it’s enough.”

He didn’t know she knew. Stupidly, he thought he was hiding it. He thought he was putting up the right front to make sure she never knew.

“And I just,” she continues. “If you think you need to talk to someone, there are resources we can look into.”

If only it were that simple. If only he could go and talk to someone. But even then, he can’t share the full truth. He can’t share what really haunts him at night. All of it would still be laced with lies. The papers he signed kept the secrets in a closed group. Not allowing anyone to come in. He doesn’t know how he could sit with a therapist and talk about this while trying to make sure he wasn’t saying too much.

“I—” he starts. Not sure how to tell her that it can’t work like that. Not sure how to communicate how much it meant to see him, and extend a helping hand.

“Just think about it,” she cuts him off. “And know I’m here if you ever need to talk.”

He nods. “I will.”

She stands, walking over to him and cupping his face with her palm, before going about her normal morning routine. So innocent to the ways of this town.

But, what she said, he forgot that she was there too. That, when Will’s casket was lowered into the ground, it was her hand on his shoulder, giving support. It was her that was called to the hospital each time he got hurt. It was her he came home to, and faked being ok.

She knew, on some level, that he could never tell her what really happened. Maybe that’s not what matters. The past can’t change, or be shared, but the future can. The promise of brightness is still there, and he wants to bask in it. He wants to move forward, get better, grow.

He wants all of it, but can’t figure out how to untie the binds that wrap his feet.

For one of the last times, he guesses, he bikes his way to Steve’s house. The heat of August slowly rising with the sun. He hears the birds chirping as they fly around, sees the squirrels start to gather their nuts. A deer runs through the woods. The familiarity of early mornings comforting.

This town holds so many memories. Good, bad, downright ugly and frightening. But it was still his home. All of them sewn together to make a feeling that he can’t describe, but everyone has. No matter where he goes, or how much he grows, this town is still the reason he is who he is.

It is terrifying to think that he will always remember, that he will never forget. But maybe forgetting is more terrifying than remembering.

“You’re here early,” Wayne comments as Dustin bikes up the drive.

“I just—” He doesn’t know why he’s here, he realizes. Just got on his bike and went somewhere familiar. Somewhere he didn’t have to hide. “Wanted to come over, I guess.”

Wayne shrugs, unlocking the door. “Rough night?”

“Kinda, it’s hard to talk about.”

“Lot of things are. Doesn’t mean you shouldn’t.”

That was the whole problem. Dustin would talk about it, but there’s only so many people that he can. Those people were his friends, with their own issues. Why would Dustin ask to dump all of his stuff on top of theirs?

“Everyone keeps saying that. You, the guys, my mom.”

Wayne studies him for a moment, before nodding his head and leading him to the living room. “You know, there were a few buddies of mine that fought in ‘Nam. When they came back, something was different about them that no one else could understand. They just came back from a war they were forced to fight, not a lot of people can say that.”

Dustin sits on the couch, listening.

“They all had their own ways of coping. One of them drank, another was in and out of prison. But the one who’s still alive, he found a group of vets and talked about it. Found the people that understood and worked with them to live past what happened to him.”

“My mom thinks I should go to therapy,” Dustin says quietly. “But I can’t.”

Wayne nods. “I know. My buddy didn’t want to go to therapy either. Didn’t have the community that he wanted. That’s why he went to the group.”

An idea starts to form in Dustin’s mind.

“Point is,” Wayne continues, “is that I’ve spent the past few months surrounded by all of you. Seeing the way you act, and react. You’re so young and already seen so much. More than anyone would have ever asked you to see. I don’t want to see it kill you like it did to them.”

A support group. With scheduled meetings. People who understand. Not just bringing it up whenever you were going to break. Stopping it as the bend began.

Dustin would be willing to do it. It was just a matter of convincing everyone else.

“I got to go.” He stands up, abruptly, rushing toward the front door.

“Woah,” Eddie says as Dustin almost runs into him. “Where are you going?”

“Dustin,” Steve asks.

They were coming out of the hall where Eddie’s room was. Eddie was wearing Steve’s old basketball shirt. There wasn’t time for this.

“I’ll explain later,” Dustin rushes as he pushes on his shoes. “But I’m coming back to whatever is happening there,” he circles between Steve and Eddie with his hand. Watching as their faces flush as he runs out the door.

He mounts his bike and feels the familiar push on his pedals. Biking down the streets he knows by memory. Until he gets to Mirkwood and pedals through. Right up that rocky hill in the woods.

He thinks back to one of the first time he biked up this hill. How it forced the breath out of his lungs and cause him to stop. Take a few minutes to catch his breath before he could continue. Now, he can do it no problem. Keep traveling like that hill was the smallest in the world. He was stronger now, older.

He was different. So, so different from that kid he used to be. Different, but still sort of the same. He still loved science, he still loved his friends. Love the same movies. But there was so much that was different. He was taller, needed to get a whole new wardrobe of clothes. Had to get a new bike, outgrew the old one. His hair was longer, and he took better care of it now.

But when he smiled, when he laughed, it was all the same. And the outside, well, everyone changed as they grew up. He wanted so much to go back and do it all over, but can’t help but think that he’d still end up right here.

There were things that he’d never choose. Horrors that would be better off unseen. But Dustin was still Dustin if he let himself be.

He knocks furiously on the Byers’ door, a tired Will opening it.

“What are you doing here this early?” he asks

“I have an idea.”

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@papergrenade, @waelkyring, @sweetheartprincess28, @katouasobj, @astercomoasflores

[dreamofbecoming]

more stobin nonsense from your resident trash goblin. feat. shitty harrington parents, lavender marriage, full party found family shenanigans, steddie flirting, steve&will bonding, and a severe lack of dialogue tags

rating: t wc: 5k ao3

“I knew it!”

Steve sighs. Listen, he knew the minute he opened his mouth that this was coming. There was always a zero percent chance Dustin was ever gonna let him get out the whole thing before bursting in with this exact interruption, but that doesn’t make it less annoying. If the little shithead would just let him finish--

"I knew you were perfect together, I can't believe you didn't tell us you were dating! How long have you been a thing? I have money to collect! Can I be your best man? Never mind, obviously I'm gonna be your best man. You so owe me for not telling me sooner! I cannot believe-"

"Henderson!"

"What?"

"We're not together like that."

In fairness, Dustin is not the only one to give them an incredulous look for that one.

"Steve. You literally just announced you and Robin are getting married. What is even the point of pretending you're not in love anymore? What are you still trying to prove? Just admit I was right the whole time!"

Steve pinches the bridge of his nose and forces himself to take a deep breath, instead of wringing Dustin's weird little boneless neck. It's not his fault, he reminds himself. They haven't gotten to the second part of the announcement, so his assumptions are natural.

Now, it is Henderson's fault that they haven't managed to say the rest of what they came here to say, so maybe he can keep blaming him after all.

"Do you remember when we sat down and we asked you guys to let us say everything we were gonna say without interrupting?"

"Uh, yeah dude, it was like ten minutes ago. We're not stupid."

"Has it occurred to you that maybe we weren't done saying everything we were gonna say, considering I was halfway through a sentence when you jumped in?"

"I mean, I guess, but like, it's pretty obvious where you're going with this, Steve. You're not a complicated guy, no offense. Now, where did we land on the best man issue?"

Nancy must see the offense very much taken on his face, because before he can open his mouth and say something probably horrifically rude that would feel amazing in the moment and which he would immediately regret, she jumps to his rescue.

"Dustin, you're being very rude. Steve and Robin came here to talk to us, and we promised to listen. Let them finish."

It's nice of her to back Steve up, considering how weird this conversation must be for her. Hopefully it gets less awkward soon.

Henderson grumbles mutinously, but years of dealing with first Mike and then the rest of the little dickheads have left Nancy's control ironclad, and he waves sarcastically for Steve to continue.

This kid is spending too much time with Eddie, the attitude is getting out of hand.

"Right. Thanks, Nance. As I was saying, Robin and I are getting married, yes. But not because we're in love. I mean, I love her, obviously, but as a friend. Only a friend. Or, well, I guess a friend and soon a...friend...wife? Frife? Wend? You guys get it."

"We very much don't." Alright, well, fine, add Max to the shitlist.

He looks over at Robin, hoping for help, but she's stiff as a board and trembling all over.

He doesn't want to be the one to say the words for her. They agreed together to tell everyone the truth, it was her idea even, but the last thing he wants to do is steal that moment from her.

Maybe he can just…talk around it, until she feels up to it. And if not, he’ll just tell them his part of it and call it good.

“We’re getting lavender married.”

Okay, so that’s probably not like. A normal way to say that or whatever. Robin just used that term like fifty times last night, alright? She was really excited about the article she just read about it, something about how it was a thing in, like, olden times or whatever, and now it’s coming back because Reagan is a fucking tool, Steve’s not sure, he was only kind of listening. Regardless, now it’s stuck in his head. Sue him or whatever, geez.

Anyway, he isn’t sure how many people in this room will actually understand what that means, but Nancy’s mouth drops open in a perfect little O the way it only does when she’s genuinely surprised by something, and there’s a tiny gasp from over by the table that he thinks might have come from Will, and Max mutters to herself “Oh shit, that explains so much,” so it’s not none of them, which helps. No pitchforks yet, at least.

Jonathan is eyeing him speculatively, and Argyle is offering him an enthusiastic thumbs up, which is nice.

Unfortunately, the other boys and El are giving him blank, expectant stares, and Erica is eyeing him with both confusion and annoyance, so it looks like he still has some explaining to do.

“What the hell does your color scheme have to do with this? I’m not helping plan the wedding, dude, I don’t care that much.”

Steve mumbles a “Language,” on reflex, but his heart isn’t in it. This is somehow more nerve-wracking than evil Russians.

“Mike, that’s not what it means. Now shut up and listen, or I’ll tell Mom how that red sock ended up in her load of white delicates.”

“Oh come on, she’ll kill me!” When all he gets in return is a single raised eyebrow, he groans and slumps further into his seat, glaring at Steve.

“Right. Okay. So basically, last night, my parents--”

“I’m a lesbian!”

There’s a beat of dead silence, which in this group is more unsettling than just about anything else.

Steve keeps his eyes on Robin, who looks just about as shocked at her own outburst as everyone else in the room. He takes her hand, squeezing gently until she unfreezes a little and looks back over at him. She looks terrified, and it breaks his heart a little.

“You okay, babe?” He keeps his voice low, murmuring just loud enough for her to hear. He knows this moment is the opposite of private, but she needs him to pretend for a second, so that’s what he’s gonna do.

She nods, a little jerkily, but she grips his hand back and intentionally evens out her breathing. She’s so fucking brave. He would burn the world down for Robin Buckley, and he doesn’t care who knows it.

He can’t believe she’s willing to do this for him, but he’s so grateful he feels like he’s choking on it.

“Henderdork will literally never shut up and let you live it down if we do this and he doesn’t know the truth. Not even for a single second for the rest of forever, and I, for one, am not putting up with that shit until death or legal marriage reforms do us part, Dingus.”

It was a solid point last night when they came up with the plan, curled on her bed while she stroked his hair and generously pretended he hadn’t soaked the shoulder of her shirt with his sobs, all his worldly possessions packed into a duffel on her bedroom floor, but he knows her insistence was more about knowing how much he hates lying to the kids than it was about protecting herself from irritating teenagers.

He doesn’t think there’s enough room on the whole planet to hold all the love he feels for her, even if you count the Upside Down and any other weirdo dimensions floating around out there waiting to ruin his day.

“I’m okay, bubba. Don’t let go?” Her hand is shaking in his, but he just squeezes harder.

“Never.” He turns back to the room, eyes hard as he scans the faces of their family for any hostility. He wouldn’t have agreed to this part of the plan if he thought any of them would be a problem, but he’s not taking anything for granted with Robbie’s safety. Not now, not ever. "Everyone's gonna be cool about that, right?"

"Of course we are, right, guys?" From the pained grunt that follows her words, Steve assumes Max has dug her elbow into Mike's ribs.

"Yeah, sure, whatever."

"I suppose this makes you slightly less lame, Buckley. It's definitely better than when I thought you liked this loser." Wow, okay, thank you Erica.

"Yeah totally! Thanks for trusting us, Robin." Lucas is a sweetheart, he really is. He's also glancing surreptitiously at Will while he nods enthusiastically, who is still staring open-mouthed at Robin with wide, shiny eyes.

"Yes, thank you for trusting us, Robin." Nancy is smiling kindly, but she's got that glint in her eye that Steve knows means she just came up with more questions and is waiting for the right moment to strike. Fair enough, at least she's letting Robs have her moment first.

He finally drags his eyes back to Dustin, who he doesn't really want to admit, even to himself, he's a little worried about. Not that he'll be shitty about it, necessarily, but there's nothing that brings out Henderson's bitchy side like being wrong, and he's been so fucking wrong this entire time. It's bound to upset him.

And maybe Steve will never say this out loud where the other kids might hear, but the truth is that Dustin's opinion matters to him more than just about everyone else's. Dustin was the first person in the whole world who saw Steve, the real Steve, and decided he was worth keeping around. If Henderson can't accept this part of Robin, it means he can't accept this part of Steve, and if that happens...if that happens Steve isn't sure he'll be able to come back from it.

So he's...not worried, okay? Worried is not the right word. Anxious, maybe. Concerned.

Okay fine fuck off he's worried.

Dustin...looks like he's about to cry. Shit.

"Did you think you couldn't trust me?" His voice is so small. Steve doesn't think he's ever heard it so small. It feels wrong. Henderson's voice should fill every room he's in, always. "You didn't have to lie. You could have told me the truth."

Aw, fuck.

"Buddy,--"

"It's not that simple, little man."

Steve whips back around to look at Robin. Are you sure you’re up for this? She purses her lips and narrows her eyes. Yeah, Dingus, this is my mess. Let me clean it up. Put the lance down, White Knight. Well, alright then. He waves for her to continue, ignoring the looks the others always shoot them when they do their silent conversation thing. Not his fault they can’t read each other as well, it’s not like it’s hard.

"Before today, Steve was the only person in the world who knew about me. And honestly, I don't know if I would have told him if we weren't both coming off torture and truth serum. I've worked hard to hide it my whole life, baby Dingus, that's not an easy thing to stop doing. It's scary."

"But we're your friends. We're your family! We saved the world together! You should trust your family, right?"

Aw, jeez. Steve forgets, sometimes, how young they are. They've been through horrific supernatural trauma, but they're still the kind of kids who think life is a story with a happy ending, like their little dragon game.

"Yeah, bud, you should, but it's not always that easy. There can be really serious consequences for telling the wrong person. Like, last night my parents found out I'm bisexual by accident and now I...well. Now I don't have parents anymore." Oof, okay, little blunter than he meant to be, but Robbie's getting anxious again so he has to take the focus back.

There's an eruption of sound, as every voice in the Party starts shouting all at once, turning the Wheeler's basement into Steve's own personal migraine generator.

"Did they kick you out?"

"You're bisexual?!"

"What's bisexual?"

"They can't just do that!"

"Does this mean we have to find somewhere else for Hellfire nights?"

That last one earns Erica several Looks, but she doesn't flinch. "What? I'm just being practical."

He wishes Eddie was here. The gremlins actually listen to him, unlike Steve, on account of as their Hellfire DM, he has leverage they care about to threaten them with. Well, most of them, but it's definitely a help when he's around.

Sadly he and Wayne are at some kind of Munson family reunion down in West Virginia this week, so Steve is gonna have to do this whole spiel over again when he gets back. He and Robin thought about waiting until he got back and the whole Party could be together, but the kids would definitely notice him not living in Loch Nora anymore pretty much immediately. And Steve hates the idea of telling him over the phone, so double coming out/engagement announcement it is.

"Alright, Jesus Christ, enough! One at a goddamn time, you animals."

He looks back at Dustin, who's definitely crying now. "Yeah, buddy, they kicked me out, but I'm okay. I'm staying with the Buckleys for now, and Rob and I have been saving up to move in together soon anyway, so all this did is move up our timeline. I'm safe and I'm fine, okay? I promise."

Dustin plasters himself to Steve's front, squeezing like he's worried Steve is going to shatter into pieces and he can hold him together by sheer force of will. It's very sweet, even if it's crushing his lungs a little.

"I'm sorry you felt like you couldn't tell me." The words are muffled in Steve's chest, he's not sure anyone else heard him.

"Aw, kid, it's okay. I trust you, alright? Always. You die, I die, remember? I was just...figuring my shit out, that's all."

"Your parents are mouthbreathers." Steve chuckles a little at the mutinous glare on El's face, not pausing his hand where he's stroking Dustin's hair.

"You're not wrong, Supergirl. But it's fine, honestly. They've always been dicks, I've been planning to move out for a long time. They just...gave me the final push, is all." He's definitely leaving out the part where he broke down sobbing in Robbie's bed last night, asking her over and over why he was so broken that his own parents couldn't love him, but the kids don't need to hear that part of the story.

"Does this have something to do with your whirlwind engagement?" There she is, ace reporter Nancy Wheeler. Observant as always.

"Yeah, pretty much. They disinherited me, but they're still legally my next of kin."

"And Dingus has had far too much head trauma for me to trust he's not gonna end up back in the hospital for something at some point, and the last thing we need is Mr. and Mrs. von Child Neglect getting that call. And I was just reading about gay men and women who are marrying each other so they can have someone allowed in to see in them in the hospital, because of the virus, you know? And I thought, hey that's not a half bad idea! We're gonna be living together anyway, and it's not like I'm marrying anyone else, and it'll be good for both of us to have someone who knows about, y'know, monsters and all that jazz, to do our power of attorney stuff, so, voila! Mr. and Mrs. Bucklington!"

"We are not changing our name to Bucklington."

"Well Harringley is worse, so suck it up, buttercup."

"I'm not interested in keeping the Harrington name, Bobs, I'd rather just be a Buckley."

"Aw, bubba, you're gonna make me cry!"

"You should both become Hendersons! Then we'd really be brothers!"

Steve erupts into laughter, the tension effectively broken by Dustin's wide, toothy grin. "What d'ya say, Bobbie? Steve and Robin Henderson?"

"Would we get access to Claudia's lasagna recipe? Because if so, I'm behind this plan one hundred percent.”

"By 'we' you do mean me, right? Because I love you more than life, Bobs, but I'm not letting you anywhere near a casserole dish. I've learned that lesson."

"It was one time!"

"It took me three days to get all the cheese off the ceiling! There's still a stain!"

"Well good! Ceiling grease stains can be the Harrington's problem now, anyway. They deserve it!"

Argyle is nodding sagely from on top of the incredibly deflated bean bag he's sharing with Jonathan. "I do like Bucklington, it makes you sound like a fancy butler. But family is important, brochachos, and so is lasagna. I vote Henderson."

This spurs impassioned arguments from all corners, which Steve is more than happy to relax into the couch cushions and let wash over him.

There's a light, bubbly feeling in his chest. For the first time since his dad walked in unannounced yesterday, interrupting his phone call with Robin at the worst possible moment, the knot of fear and grief in his stomach starts to loosen.

Robin smiles at him, and he grins helplessly back. Who needs parents when he's got a soulmate? They're together, they're safe, they're surrounded by their family. Steve holds Dustin tighter to his side and lets himself feel loved.

He takes advantage of a lull in the Last Name Wars to get out the last of the speech he'd planned. "Anyway, we decided to tell all of you the truth when we came up with this plan last night, because we do trust you and we didn't want to lie to you, and also because we knew you shitheads would never shut up about us being in love if we didn't and that sounded awful."

He laughs delightedly at the chorus of indignant outbursts this gets him before continuing.

"It's really important that you don't tell anyone outside the Party the truth, alright? We're gonna tell Eddie when he gets back, and we might tell Joyce and Hop eventually, but that needs to be our choice to do. You can't do it for us, and you absolutely can't tell anyone else. The whole point of this is to keep us safe by keeping people from finding out the truth, okay?"

El looks vaguely uncomfortable, but not upset. "Will you tell my Dad soon?"

Steve glances at Robbie, who's looking anxious again, and then over at Will. His shoulders are tense, hunched up around his ears, and he's staring intently at the table in front of him.

Steve isn't sure if anyone else knows what he thinks he knows about Will, but he's pretty sure he recognizes the specific flavor of isolation he can see Will struggling with sometimes, and he's definitely sure he recognizes the looks Will shoots at Mike whenever Wheeler isn't looking. Tommy used to look at him like that.

Either way, he knows the kind of fear the kid must be suffering, just like he knows how terrifying today was for Robin. For Steve, the worst case scenario has already happened, so he has a lot less left to lose. He can afford to smooth the way a little, to test the waters and make sure they're safe for everyone else.

It's not that different from his normal role in this group anyway, just a different kind of monster. He's always been good at taking hits so the others don't have to-- this is just another threat to step in front of.

"Tell you what, Ellie, I'll talk to Hop and Joyce this weekend, that way you won't have to keep secrets from him for too long. I'll just tell him about me, though, at first, okay? That way we'll know if it's safe for Robbie." Or anyone else, he doesn't say.

Jonathan hears it, at the very least, and shoots him a look that's equal parts surprised and grateful. Maybe Will has someone else in his corner after all, then.

El nods happily, satisfied with that.

Before anyone else can jump in, there's a clattering on the basement stairs. None of them have time to tense up too badly before the door bursts open and Eddie comes tumbling through it in a flurry of dark curls and frayed denim.

"Fear not, my wayward wastrels, for I have returned from far off lands, bearing tidings and the promise of libations!"

Steve only recognizes, like, four of those words, but seeing Eddie gives him the same happy, fizzy feeling in his gut that it always does these days, so he grins.

"You're back early, Eds, everything ok?"

Eddie blinks at him, then around the room, looking surprised to see it so packed.

"Yeah, my cousin Clarence accidentally broke my MeeMaw's pasture fencing and set all the goats loose in the hills, and if we stuck around we were gonna have to help round them back up, so Wayne and I snuck out early. I was coming to invite the gremlins out for pizza to tell you all about it, but this is more people than I was expecting. Y'all having a family meeting? Without little old moi?"

Steve valiantly suppresses the shiver that the twang in Eddie's voice triggers. Steve's not sure if Eddie notices the way his accent gets stronger when he's been talking to family, but he's had to work very hard to make sure he doesn't notice the way it affects Steve.

Steve has barely tested the flirting waters with Eddie since admitting his crush to Robin, he's definitely not jumping right in with 'It makes me tingly all over when you start talking with a drawl, wanna call me darlin' and see what happens?'

Luckily Bobbie notices his inner struggle and comes to his rescue.

"It was kind of a time sensitive issue- not a life or death one! Or like. Not a monster one, anyway. But shit went down last night and we needed to brief everyone before the geek squad figured out something was funky and came beating down the door. Steve wanted to tell you in person so we were gonna wait til you got back, but here you are!"

Eddie's looking at Robin with an amused smile on his face, one eyebrow raised and his lips quirked in a lopsided grin that is, frankly, unreasonably attractive. "Here I am indeed, my fair Lady of Feathers. So what's the scoop?"

He plops down next to Jonathan and Argyle on the beanbags, nearly sending them all toppling before Argyle hooks both of them around the waists and drags them practically into his lap.

Steve is not seething with jealousy. He's not.

A half a dozen voices chime out all at once.

"Robin's gay!"

"Steve's homeless."

"Robin and Steve are getting married!"

“Purple married.”

“It’s lavender, dummy.”

“Lavender’s a kind of purple!”

"They're gonna be Hendersons!"

"No they aren't, weirdo, they're gonna be Buckleys."

"Bucklington is clearly the superior choice, even if Argyle was right about the butler thing."

“Bucklington my ass, y’all dumb as hell if you think Mom and Dad aren’t gonna try and make him a Sinclair after this.”

"Mama and Papa Harrington didn't like that Stevie boy has double the love to give. Totally bogus. Bi bros for life, man."

"I still call Steve's best man!"

Eddie blinks a little when everyone quiets down, looking vaguely shellshocked. "That was. A lot of information to get in thirty seconds."

And, listen, Steve is like, 97% sure Eddie's cool. More than cool, even. He moves that bandana to the same pocket every time he changes his jeans, no matter what outfit he's wearing. There's no way that's an accident. But if Steve is being totally honest, which he's trying to do more these days, at least inside his own brain, this is maybe not the way he'd have chosen to come out to his crush. It's somehow way more nerve-wracking when he didn't even get to say it himself.

Oh well, it's out there now. It's fine, probably.

Still, there’s a definite feeling of relief when Eddie turns that megawatt grin on him again.

"Man, I wish I'd known there were other queers in Hawkins, I might have listened sooner when Henderson told me how cool you guys were!"

Steve laughs, only a little hysterically. "Dude, if you thought you were the only one, what the hell have you been wearing that hanky for? Who are you hoping will see it?"

It's a little gratifying to see Eddie go flaming tomato red in seconds. "I am not talking about that in mixed company, Steven. There are children here!"

"Ugh, we're literally teenagers."

"Tiny baby infants! If you're so curious, you can ask me again later."

"Promise?" Steve can't stop himself from grinning wolfishly.

Eddie tugs his hair in front of his face to hide, and the frantic little giggle and the quiet "Oh my god," he lets out both sound more than a little strangled. Steve's having the time of his life right now.

"Gross." Ugh, rude. He glares at Robin for ruining his fun. She sticks her tongue out at him.

Before they can devolve into the inevitable slapfight, Nancy cuts in again.

"Alright, unless anyone else has anything to share in private, I think we should take Eddie's suggestion and get something to eat." Good thinking, Nance. "To celebrate the happy couple, of course," she adds with a smirk. Yeah, that makes more sense.

"Onward then, my noble companions, to pizza and to paradise!" Eddie vaults off the beanbag, sending Jonathan and Argyle tumbling. Argyle laughs and accepts Eddie's hand up, while Jonathan just rolls his eyes good-naturedly.

Eddie slings an arm around Robin's shoulders as they head for the basement door. "So, Birdie, what's this I hear about a wedding? I need context."

As the kids go thundering up the stairs, arguing about who gets to drive in which car, Steve lingers. He noticed Will hanging back from the others, and now they're the last ones left, Will still slowly packing up the pens and notebooks he seems to carry around with him everywhere. Jonathan is hovering anxiously in the doorway, so Steve sends him a nod and waves him off. He's got this.

"You ready to go, kid?"

Will fidgets with the zipper on his bag for another few seconds before looking up at Steve through his, frankly tragic, fringe. "I'm sorry your parents suck."

"Yeah, man, me too." Steve shoots him a wry little smile. "It's alright though, sometimes we're better off without them. I've got plenty of family here that love me, I'll survive without Richard and Diane."

Will studies him for a minute. Steve's not sure what he's looking for, but he hopes he finds it.

"That's what Jonathan says about Lonnie." Steve nods, trying not to wince at the memory of the things he spat at Jonathan that day in '83 when everything changed. "I used to think it was my fault he left, but Jonathan says he was just a bastard, and it's better he's gone anyway."

"I didn't know Lonnie," he's careful not to say your dad, "but from what I've heard, Jonathan's probably right. And he's definitely right that it's not your fault."

"Like it's not your fault your parents kicked you out?"

"Yeah, exactly like that. If it was my fault, that would mean I did something wrong. The only thing I did was exist, and be different than they thought I would be. If they can't love the kid they had, then they shouldn't have had a kid at all. That's their problem, not mine. There's nothing wrong with me."

It doesn't matter if he heard all of these things from Robin first, if he's still trying to learn to believe them. Will needs to hear them like they're true, the same way Steve does.

"Are you sure?" Will's voice is trembling now. He's looking at the floor, but Steve can tell there are tears coming. "How can you be sure this is how you're supposed to be? Wouldn't you rather be normal?"

Oh, kid. "I mean, yeah, maybe it would be easier if I only liked girls, but I don't. I tried for a long time to pretend that I did, but it didn't make it true. And yeah, part of me wants to hate myself, because that's what they taught me to think, and I still kinda wish doing that would make them love me, but it won't. But honestly, you wanna know the biggest thing?" Will nods.

"I can't hate that part of myself without hating Robin, and there's no universe where I could hate Robin. Robin's perfect. She's the best person in the world, and she's gay, so being gay can't be bad. It's impossible. So whenever that voice in my head starts saying shitty things to me, I just think about how much I love Robin and tell it to shut up."

There's a beat where Will seems to be absorbing this.

"How did you know it would be safe? To tell us the truth?"

"I didn't."

Will stares at him in shock.

"Not a hundred percent, anyway. I was pretty sure, but it's never a guarantee with stuff like this, you know? But the other option was never telling anyone, and that...it gets tiring, you know? Always having to hide. Always having to check yourself. Lying when people ask the wrong questions. It wears you down. And I've fought monsters with you guys. I've been tortured by spies with you guys. If I can't trust this group to have my back, I can't trust anyone, can I? And I didn't want to live a life of not trusting anyone. I didn't want Bobbie to live a life like that. So, we took a chance. And it paid off, because all of you are the people we thought you were, and we were right to trust you. But it was a leap of faith, dude. It always is."

"What if I'm not ready?" Fucking shit, this kid. He's been through more than any of them, except maybe El, and he's still so goddamn brave. Steve would have crumpled like a tin can in his place.

"Then you're not ready. It's not a test, Will. There's no right or wrong answers. But I will say that every single person out there loves you, and they'll keep loving you no matter what you do. They're not like my parents, or Lonnie. Our friends aren't broken inside the way they are. Their love isn't conditional. You won't chase them away. You couldn't if you tried."

Will lets out a shaky breath, clearly fighting back tears. Steve leans against the table and keeps his head down, offering the kid the illusion of privacy while he pulls himself together. After a few minutes he speaks up again.

"You ready to go, you think?"

Will nods. He goes to walk past Steve to the stairs before hesitating and, to Steve's surprise, wrapping his gangly arms around him in an awkward hug.

"Thanks, Steve," he mumbles into Steve's shoulder.

Steve runs a hand down his back uncertainly. "Anytime, kid."

He keeps his arm around Will's shoulders tentative, but when the kid doesn't shrug him off or move away, he lets it settle more firmly, tugging him closer.

“Come on Baby Byers, let's go get some pizza. You think I can milk the disownment thing to get Eddie to pay for extra toppings?"

Will snorts. "I think Eddie would pay for as many toppings as you want as long as you do that little eyelash thing at him again."

Steve throws his head back and laughs, long and loud from his belly. Yeah, it's gonna be a good night.

my head hurts too much to keep writing this but please know that the pizza parlor engagement party involves plenty of arguing about roles in the wedding party, resulting in MOH erica/best man dustin (scoops troop babeyy), flower girl team lumax (max demanded the role bc her wheelchair means she can carry extra baskets of petals, and lucas will be pushing the chair so her hands are free. he's just excited to be there.) nancy/el bridesmaids and byler groomsmen (mike grumbles and groans but he's secretly thrilled). jonathan does the pictures and it turns out argyle got ordained back in cali as a joke so he officiates. eddie plays crimson and clover for robin’s wedding march. there’s a bit of a kerfuffle when claudia and the sinclairs both try to claim steve as their son, but after someone makes the argument that charles and sue have two kids to carry their name while claudia only has one, they end up hyphenating and becoming the buckley-hendersons. yes, claudia cries. yes, they get the lasagna recipe.

(at the pizza place, eddie asks what his role will be and steve says he doesn't know yet, but he'll save him a dance regardless. eddie has to hide in the bathroom to stop blushing.)

[runninriot]

no reason to hide

written for @steddie-week day 1 | prompt: secret relationship

rated: t | wc: 4.5k | tags: Max POV, Max & Eddie friendship, Max & Steve Friendship, Steve and Eddie are keeping secrets, coming out, post Vecna, everybody lives | complete fic on ao3

The first time she notices something strange is going on between Eddie and Steve, is when Max wakes up in the middle of the night from one of those ghastly dreams that have been haunting her since the whole Vecna fiasco went down.

She does what she always does when she can’t fall back asleep - goes to sit on the steps outside of her home to listen to the familiar sounds of the trailer park, looking at the sky, the stars and the moon, reminding herself that she’s back in the real world. That the Upside Down and all its monsters are a memory of the past.

It’s been almost a year and things have finally gone back to how they were. Well, mostly.

Sure, those nights where the monsters come crawling back into her subconscious are draining sometimes, but after everything that happened to her, nightmares, a walking stick, and glasses are a small price to pay. She could’ve paid a much higher one, could’ve lost it all. She’s fine. And at least the nightmares are a burden they all share.

Her friends have them too, those restless nights. And even if that doesn’t make it better, the fact that they are in this together makes it easier, at least.

Max knows she can always count on them – her now-again-boyfriend Lucas and the stupid but lovable dorks Dustin and Mike. Even El and Will, who went back to California, are always just one phone call away.

She has Steve, who – while Nancy and Robin went off to college – didn’t leave.

He’s still here, still taking care of them in his annoyingly loving way, even though they don’t need him to be their protector anymore, technically.

She’d never say it out loud, would rather eat her own tongue than to admit it, but to know that he’s part of her life is kind of... comforting. Because he’s graduated from babysitter to friend long ago, has proven time and again that he’s a good guy with a big heart. Max likes him a lot, can understand why Dustin was always so drawn to him.

And then, there’s Eddie.

Before being caught in a war against evil and nearly walking into the light at the end of the tunnel together, she never really cared much for him at all. (And no, she did not have a very stupid, very tiny crush on him when she learned about him playing guitar in this awesome band. Anyone who suggests otherwise can talk it out with her fist, okay?!)

She had often wondered how much truth was behind all the rumours, the Satanic Freak allegations. Because while he obviously liked to cause trouble every now and then, he always seemed... nice. A little boisterous, maybe, but never violent or evil.

And then she got to know him when they were trying to prove his innocence while being caught in their final battle against evil, and realised how much they had in common.

How Eddie, like her, wears a mask to protect his vulnerable pieces inside. Carrying the burden of a broken home and too much pent-up anger on his shoulders.

Max sees a version of herself in Eddie, and seeing how far he’s come – even if he himself doesn’t think he has – is encouraging, in a way.

She never told anyone, but out of everyone, Eddie might have played the biggest part in her recovery.

When she opened her eyes for the first time after being in a coma, the first blurry face she saw wasn’t Lucas or Steve or even her own mother.

No. It was Eddie.

Half his body in bandages, leaning heavy on his crutches holding him upright where he was standing beside her hospital bed, smiling down at her, which looked painful because of the stitches on his left cheek, but it was warm and friendly and honest.

And in that moment, when the memories came back and the world came crushing down, Max was glad it was him that watched her fall apart. Because with Eddie, she didn’t feel the need to pretend that she was fine. He let her cry and wince in pain without commenting on it, just took her hand – no words of pity, no promises of false hopes, just a tight squeeze of her hand in silent support.

Their friendship evolved from there, got even stronger when they were both fighting their way through physical therapy, from frustrating setbacks to miraculous accomplishments.

He’s annoying sometimes, like a brother, but he’s the kind of friend that you love to fight with because you know they’ll never hold a grudge; Eddie's friendship is unconditional and Max cherishes that more than she'd ever tell him.

Eddie, like her, finds it hard to sleep sometimes. So, more times than not, when she goes to sit on the steps in the middle of the night, she finds him outside his own trailer – smoking in silence or listening to music with his headphones on.

They don’t usually talk, just share a few moments together in peace until their minds have calmed enough for them to get ready to conquer another day.

This is why Max doesn’t startle when she hears the familiar squeak of the Munson’s trailer door. Only when a car door gets slammed close, does she look up.

Weirdly enough, it isn’t Eddie who’s going for a ride. It isn’t his van that slowly turns and rolls out of the driveway.

It’s Steve’s car; there’s no doubt about it. She knows that car better than Steve likes to be reminded of.

    What the hell is he doing at Eddie’s place at 2 in the morning?, Max wonders, worries that maybe something is wrong.

But moments later, the trailer door opens again and Eddie steps out, dressed in his pajama pants, lighting a cigarette like he always does. He seems calm, happy. Not at all like something bad has happened.

Until he notices her and his eyes widen in shock, mouth hanging open with the cigarette stuck to his bottom lip.

   “Max! How- how long have you been out here?”

She doesn’t exactly know why she doesn’t tell the truth but something about the way Eddie looks at her tells Max, he might not want her to know about his nightly visitor.

   “Just came out like, maybe a second before you did,” she lies, watching his shoulders drop as the tension in his body eases.

   “Oh, uh, okay. Nightmare?”

   “Yeah.”

   “You wanna talk?”

   “Nah, just needed some fresh air. You?”

   “I- I’m good. Just, uh, just couldn’t sleep.”

They sit there for a while, both awkwardly looking anywhere but at each other, before Max can’t take it anymore, says her goodnight and goes back inside.

There is probably a good explanation for it all. Maybe Steve couldn’t sleep, too. Maybe he went to Eddie for some weed? (Don’t act so surprised. She might just be a teen but she’s not stupid, okay?)

Whatever it is, Max will never know because going by the way Eddie reacted when he saw her, she’s sure he doesn’t want to be questioned about it.

It’s fine. It’s none of her business anyway.

And Max forgets about it entirely until something strange happens again a few weeks later...

keep reading

[chirpsythismorning]

I just realized that in s5, instead of a parallel to Mike breaking down with Hopper and just doing that again, I want one with Mike and Jonathan.

Something interesting about Jonathan is that he tends to be pretty quiet in situations where literally everyone is being critical of Mike, notably in the scene at Hopper’s canon when he blurts out that he loves El. That whole scene everyone is ganging up on him, most notably Nancy, but the whole time Jonathan is just staring at Mike, deep in thought…

We also know he witnessed A LOT in s4 in regards to Will and just the whole truth of the situation might be closer to him then we realize. Like for example, even though we didn’t see Mike’s expression in the van scene after the painting reveal, with it being blurred from our view, Jonathan on the other hand did see it. He also was there for that and the monologue at SB where he basically just used Will’s words to try to save El. And so what does Jonathan think about that?…

While I know the expectation for a lot of fans is that Jonathan like hates Mike bc of him hurting Will as of the last year or so on a couple notable occasions (now El too presumably), I think there is still something complex about their relationship that would make for a pretty epic television.

Not saying the scene couldn’t start out with some clashing and stuff, bc I mean after all the literal same thing happens with Hopper and Mike in s2. The scene starts confrontational and emotional only for Mike to start sobbing and literally fall into Hopper’s arms for comfort. Even in the following scene he chooses to stay close to Hopper’s side, like it’s clear his outburst had less to do with Hopper ‘lying’ and more to do with all of his bottled emotions coming to head in that moment. And in the company of a man that he looks up to, who is basically seeing him at his lowest.

And I think Jonathan and him having a moment like this, in their own way, maybe related to El again like the talk with Hopper, but I think it ending with it being about Will and Mike breaking down again, maybe thinking Jonathan hates him and then turning it on himself like no one hates me more than I hate myself for how I feel. Or just him basically getting emotional over a similar situation to s2, but us basically getting the Will side of it this time, which would essentially re-contextualize the s2 scene as well.

Another reason I think this scene would be incredible honestly, is because Finn very clearly looks up to Charlie, with him literally following him around on set and you can just tell they have a very close bond that would make for incredible chemistry on screen as Jonathan just like Hopper (arguably even more so), is in this male position of someone that Mike looks up to, who also knows sides of him that quite frankly no one does, it has the ability to be a really emotional and gratifying moment.

Maybe Jonathan is being a little bit curt with Mike and it leads to an argument of some sort. Though it ends with something along the lines of Mike just breaking down and Jonathan comforting him like I never hated you Mike and him just holding him and them talking about their true feelings about the situation.

Mike’s never gonna get that sort of deep and emotional bond with his father, so it feels almost poetic that he’d have these moments with the two men in Will’s life who’ve also had a huge impact on Mike’s life as well and who he will be tethered to forever as family bc of his relationship with Will.

I need it and I need it yesterday.

[will80sbyers]

Hi Dani

Hope you’re well

I’m Just wondering

What do you think is the moment Mike/Will realised they had feelings for the other or that their feelings weren’t quite Platonic? How do you think this could be addressed in season 5 when they confess? How would this play into the way the general audience perceives Byler becoming canon under the lens that it’s always been in the background. That it’s not framed out of the blue and out of nowhere.

Heyy! For Will I think he has a crush on Mike from s1 but he's not aware of it yet, then in season 2 the crush grows and he's trying to deny it to himself, season 3 is when he realized that he's in love with Mike, he knew but he couldn't deny it to himself anymore, he still has not accepted himself for being gay but he knows he is now and he knows he loves Mike and then in season 4 he's still feeling shame for being gay but he's 100% aware that he's gay and that he loves Mike and he sort of jumps around between almost accepting himself and this feeling of shame for having those feelings for him...

For Mike I personally think he liked Will from the beginning, but it was always something under the surface that he's mistaking for only platonic love, and I think Mike has not fully realized yet that he has feelings for Will, he's repressing everything and he wants to convince himself that what's between them is only platonic... Even when he is actively feeling the electricity between them and he feels horrible when Will leaves for Lenora, and I think Mike missed Will more than he was missing El and this weirded him out because in his mind he's saying to himself that that's not a normal thing to feel and he should just focus on El basically but he feels wrong when him and Will are in a fight or not talking and it makes him panic, he just doesn't understand exactly why yet!

For season 5 they could do it in sooo many different ways that I'm not really sure how it will happen exactly, I'm sure the painting will play a part in them finding out about their romantic feelings tho and probably also Vecna trying to torture them in the mind space, what I'm wishing for is for Will to confess his love for Mike first and then Mike makes the first move for the kiss sort of confirming that he feels the same... I think framing them as romantic is very easy you can even just use a flashbacks sequence of their memories together + a speech at the same time and then the kiss and it would be pretty clear, byler was never out of nowhere, you can see it when you rewatch the show without keeping your eyes closed by heteronormativity...

We wouldn't be here as a fandom if we couldn't see it already in the story, we can even just watch the many edits of them and see how easy it is to make it more evident by replaying or rewatching a couple of their scenes + they will add more scenes in S5, some romantic moments like they did for Nancy and Jonathan in S2 and maybe they'll try to frame it in a way where you're not sure of what Mike is feeling exactly until the end but you'll still have those moments of tension and electricity and closeness between them

[queenie-ofthe-void]

The Babysitter Chronicles - Byers

Steve POV 5+1 (immediately follows s2) || wc: 3.9k || cws: check tags || full fic ao3

Henderson || Mayfield pt 1 / Mayfield pt 2 || Sinclair || Wheeler || Byers || +1 Hopper

Can be read as a standalone

~~~

Steve’s filled with dread, standing in front of the Byers’ front door at 6:30am on a Saturday morning. Out of all the kids’ parents, he’s pushed Joyce off as long as he could manage. But he’d promised Mike he’d try, and according to Jonathan, this is the best time to catch her.

That doesn’t change the fact it’s not even light out, and a boy she probably hates is about to knock on her door. Hell of a way to start the day.

He knocks anyway.

Joyce opens the door in a soft grey t-shirt and baggy black sweats. Her hair is brushed through, mascara coats her long lashes, and the smell of fresh coffee wafts through the open door. At least he can find small consolation in the fact she’s been up for a while.

“Hi Joyce, I mean Ms. Byers,” he stumbles, off to a great start. “Sorry to catch you so early but–” 

“No,” Joyce interrupts, voice firm. 

Steve stands there, mouth hanging open around an unfinished sentence. He watches as her eyes harden. She squares her shoulders and stands straight-backed and tall, only reaching about Steve’s shoulder. Joyce Byers in all her fury still makes him feel small, like maybe this was a bad idea.

“I’m sorry, Steve,” Joyce says. “But I know why you’re here. And the answer is no.”

“Oh,” he responds lamely, deflating even further. 

Her voice is soft, but she’s unyielding. “The kids like you, and I know their parents are ok with you watching them. Which is fine, for their kids.”

She pauses, and Steve knows what’s coming. Mentally prepared himself for the worst-case scenario. All of Dustin’s logical arguments and Lucas’ hype talks couldn’t prepare him for how thoroughly Joyce flays him open.

“But, Steve, I would never trust you with my kids.”

Even though he's desperate to run, he plants himself like a tree on her front stoop. He's trying not to be that guy. The kids deserve the best version of him, and on some level, he knows cutting out the bad parts of himself includes letting Joyce Byers drag him through the mud.

He tries to hold her gaze, really he does. Her dark eyes are filled with conviction, but he can see the gentleness to them as well. Almost sad, like he’s making her do this to him. 

Joyce grips the door, knuckles white with tension. She takes a step out onto the front stoop, forcing Steve to take a measured step back. The door stays cracked and the smell of burning toast reaches his nose. Nausea rises in his throat.

“They shouldn’t have even been in those tunnels in the first place,” she says, voice growing louder as she gains momentum. “We asked you to watch them, we trusted you with them, and they still almost got killed! And I know, I know, you helped Jonathan and Nancy last year– saved them from that, that thing crawling out of our walls.”

Her eyes flicker over her shoulder, like the demogorgon’s still haunting her house. He follows her gaze, like Billy could still be standing in her living room with a blood-stained, toothy smile.

She sighs, exasperated. At her wits end for being pushed into a conversation she’s probably been dreading for weeks, since it seems she knew what he wanted. “But you’d be with my baby, my Will, everyday. He’s had bullies since kindergarten, and it’s only gotten worse since everything.

“He doesn’t deserve more bullies. And from what I’ve heard, you’re no different. Just like your father.”

Steve flinches– can’t help himself– the sentence ringing through his head.

Just like your father.

“No, no I’m not, I swear,” he chokes on the words as she steam rolls his pathetic lamentations.

“You’ve pushed my boys– and kids just like them– around your whole life, making them feel small for having less money, less friends, less stuff. Every time Jonathan came home with a new bruise or bloodied knees, how do I know that wasn’t you?”

Steve’s watering eyes are fixated on the small, furious woman before him, flushed with a rage familiar to any decent mother protecting her kids. He’s trying so hard to hear her, but his head is filled with static and his mouth feels stuffed with cotton. Steve wipes his hands down the front of his pants, then shoves them in his pockets.

“You called my boy queer! Something I’m sure you heard from your father. I saved for months to get him that camera for his birthday and you just smashed it, like it was nothing. Like we’re nothing.”

Neither of them notice the pair of shadows moving beyond the door frame in the living room. 

“I cannot allow someone like you around my boys,” she hammers home. This is what Nance meant by a thesis statement he thinks deliriously. “Sue and Karen might be alright with it, but my answer is no.”

Steve sniffles and nods stiffly as turns to leave, hoping to at least make it to his car before the tears start. He knows he deserves what she’s said, knows the truth of it in his gut, but he’s stood here long enough. Now it’s time to run and hide, like his mind’s been screaming to since she set her sights on him.

“Mom,” Jonathan says, out of breath like he ran here from his bedroom. He’s appeared over Ms. Byers’ shoulder like a ghost, or a ninja– silent and on the attack. “What’s going on?”

He’s a sleep-rumpled version of his mom, wearing a plain, soft t-shirt, and grey sweatpants scattered with light bleach stains. Steve notices he still has pillow creases on his left cheek. His gaze follows the red indent down to Jonathan’s jawline where a small, purpling bruise is haloed by faded red lipstick.

All of the air in Steve’s lungs is punched out of him, hard and fast. A feeling he should be used to from Jonathan Byers. 

Steve thinks he sees a flash of pastels in his periphery, dashing through the trees to the road. Or maybe it’s his imagination. It doesn’t matter, because he can’t look away from the uncomfortably familiar mark on Jonathan’s neck.

Jonathan must notice. His hand flies up to his neck, wiping the mark and finding a smear of red on his fingers. The spell holding Steve breaks, and he can breathe again. 

Their eyes meet, and Jonathan’s cheeks now match the stain on his fingers. It’s awkward and Steve doesn’t know how to fix it or how to make this easier. Because Steve never knows how to fix things, only how to break them. Something Joyce seems well aware of.

Distracted, Steve’s just now noticing the small shadow creeping up behind Jonathan. He sees the young boy poke his head out from behind his brother’s back as he takes a small step towards the commotion.

“Steve was just leaving, sweetie,” Joyce answers, voice soft and sweet as she turns away from him to go back inside.

“Wait, no that’s not what I meant,” Jonathan continues. He shakes his head and roughly pushes his unruly bangs from his eyes. “Steve, why are you here?”

Jonathan’s looking at him like he knows the answer. And he should really, considering the only reason Mike agreed to have Steve as his babysitter was because Jonathan promised he’d talk to Will about it, and then they’d talk to Joyce. 

A long train of telephone Steve was relying on to get a head start at Joyce’s good will. Which, apparently, never happened.

Steve plays along into Jonathan’s prompting. She’s already said no, so what’s one more try with a little back-up.

“I was asking if I could babysit Will, since I watch the rest of the gang too. Can’t leave any party members behind,” Steve says, parroting Dustin.

“And I was just telling him–” Joyce starts, before she’s interrupted.

“I think Steve would be a great babysitter,” Will says. His hair’s a mess, and he’s straightening out his matching Star Wars pajama set as he steps further into view.

Joyce rushes over to him, squatting down to meet his eyes. “Will, honey, you don’t need a new babysitter. You can still spend time with your friends at their houses, when their parents are home.” Jonathan takes the distraction to wave Steve into the house, silently closing the door behind them.

“But the other parents don’t know about– you know,” Will hesitates, before mustering up the courage to say “about what actually happened to me.”

“Baby,” she says, gently running her hands up and down his small arms. “You know we can’t tell them. We went over this.”

“It’s not about them knowing the truth,” Will says. Steve watches as the boy tries to make himself bigger, taller, even with the slight shake in his voice. “They just look at me like I’m broken. They’re sad when I’m around and they just think I was kidnapped or lost or– whatever the story is. That I was sick or something.”

Steve can’t help but imagine Will Byers, always the shy, quiet kid in the Party, having to constantly withstand the severely misguided pitying glances from adults who aren’t read-in on vast government conspiracies and alternate dimensions. Steve’s almost nineteen and can barely manage alone.

Her brows are knitted tight and her lips downturned the more Will confesses. “Well, Jonathan can–”

“I don’t want Jonathan to watch me anymore.”

Joyce’s eyes widen, confusion painted across her face as her mouth drops open. Steve turns to glance at Jonathan to find that, unlike his mother, he’s not surprised at all. In fact, there’s a light shining in his eyes and a small uptick to the corner of his mouth.

The tension is thick but familial, leaving Steve unwelcome and gawking at a private conversation. Which he supposes he is: both unwelcome and gawking.

“Go on, Will, it’s ok,” Jonathan encourages. He shines with a proud smile, like he’s watching his little brother walk for the first time. 

Will’s hesitant, his eyes downcast as he shuffles side-to-side. Waiting for him to continue, Joyce stays quiet. Steve can’t help but feel envious of Will and Jonathan at having a mom patient enough to hear her son outright, even when she doesn’t agree with him. She saved him from an alternate dimension, but sometimes the little things are just as important.

“When Jonathan dropped me off at Steve’s for DnD last week, it was fine… at first.”

“You both told me that was at Mike’s,” Joyce interrupts, turning a motherly glare at Jonathan who sheepishly avoids eye contact. She rounds on Steve again, closing the distance between them in three long strides to get in his face. “This is exactly what I’m talking about, Steve. What if something had happened and I didn’t know where to find him because of you?”

“Mom,” Jonathan interrupts, irritated. “That’s not fair. We are the ones who said it was at Mike’s– Will and I. I knew you wouldn’t let him go if you knew it was at Harrington’s place, so I told Will to lie.”

“You’re damn right I wouldn’t have let him go,” Joyce argues, turning back to Jonathan. “He’s not safe there! I know Steve Harrington and I know his parents. What if they had been home?”

“They haven’t been home in weeks,” Steve mumbles. He doesn’t mean to say it out loud, catching himself off guard. Years of practicing the lie, and he slips in front of the last three people on earth he’d want to know about his home life. He’d never complain, not to them. 

She shoots him a confused glance, an emotion behind her eyes Steve refuses to consider. But it seems she’s the only one whose noticed he said anything at all as Jonathan speaks up again. Shaking her head, she shifts her attention back to her son. In the midst of the chaos, Steve breathes a small sigh of relief.

“Mom, it was fine– everything was fine. Just–” Jonathan stops. He gestures to Will to keep going.

Will puffs his chest up, holding his mom’s gaze as he barrels on. “I liked having it at Steve’s. It smells nice, like candles, not like farts and laundry detergent like Mike’s basement. He had all the snacks we like, and he’s got a huge table that can fit all our stuff.”

The kid’s smiling now, and goddamn if it doesn’t melt his heart. Steve’ll be disappointed if Joyce says no, but at least he knows for a fact Will felt comfortable around Steve and liked being at his house.

“But after Jonathan picked me up, Lucas said they stayed up and watched movies all night. That Steve even made an ice cream sundae bar and there were a million toppings.” Will’s arguing is starting to sound like a petulant child, a slight whine to his tone, and Steve can tell Joyce is losing her patience.

“Will, that’s something you and Jonathan can do. We’d love to do sleepover nights with your friends.”

“No, Mom,” Jonathan states, strong in a way Steve’s never seen from him before. His only tell is the waver behind his voice. Steve’s willing to bet Jonathan would rather face down another demogorgon than take on his own mother. Yet here he is, sticking his neck on the line for Will.

“What do you mean, no?” It’s barely a question.

“I don’t want to babysit Will anymore.” He quickly closes his eyes and shakes his head, like an etch-a-sketch. “No, wait– I’m not babysitting Will anymore.”

The room falls deadly silent. Joyce’s lips flatten into a thin, white line, matching the color of her knuckles. She looks ready to explode, like how his father used to look before the first blow. 

Steve flinches when she takes a step towards Jonathan, and she clocks his reaction just like before, but ignores him to glare at her oldest son.

“I want to spend more time with Nancy.” Jonathan’s eyes are wide, like he forgot Steve was there, and he can see an embarrassed flush painting his ears. Steve just shrugs. It is what it is, he’ll get over it like he always does. Jonathan relaxes a bit. “I want to get a job so I can take her on dates that are more than just driving out to the quarry.” 

“Jonathan,” Joyce jumps in, “you can’t get a job. You’re grades are slipping as it is and you don’t have time–”

“Exactly! I don’t have time for a job right now. But if Steve starts watching Will after school and some weekends, I can get a job and keep my grades up and spend time with Nancy.”

She’s shaking her head, but Jonathan plows on before she can jump back into the fray.

“Billy Hargrove is a goddamn monster, Mom. He almost killed Steve! And we all know the kids would’ve found a way to get to the tunnels no matter what. Steve was beat to hell and still went with them.” Jonathan points at Steve’s face in emphasis, like a fucked up version of a pretty model showboating a new car. Except the model is the guy who stole his girlfriend, and the car is a has-been with a fucked up brain and no future.

“And last year,” Jonathan continues, “Nancy and I would be dead if he didn’t come back for us. After everything that happened between us, he had no reason to turn around. Hell, I’m not sure I would’ve.”

He doesn’t know Jonathan Byers well, but Steve knows for a fact Jonathan would’ve faced death to save him– to save anyone. It’s not even a question.

Joyce still doesn’t seem convinced. “Everything that happened last year is exactly what I’m worried about, Jonathan.”

“It’s my fault, not his!” Jonathan shouts. “It’s my fault he got sucked into this mess, it’s my fault Nancy left him, and it’s my fault he broke the camera!” Color drains from his face. Steve freezes, staring at him. 

Steve still hasn’t told anyone why he broke the camera– none of them have talked about it, and he never planned to bring it up. Ultimately he’s thankful that the pictures exist, since it provided the only clue to Barb’s death and the Upside-Down. 

But he doesn’t understand why Jonathan took the pictures. And it doesn’t change the fact Steve closes his blinds every night.

“What do you mean, your fault?” Joyce asks, out of sorts. 

He stammers a bit, looking to Steve for help. Steve doesn’t want to have this conversation at all, let alone in front of Jonathan’s entire family. He glares back at Jonathan, tersely shaking his head once.

Lie.

He gets the gist, relief stark on Jonathan’s face. 

“Steve caught Nancy and I sneaking around when we were looking for Barb and Will,” Jonathan quickly recovers. “We didn’t want him poking around, so we let him think we were flirting. But some pictures I had taken of Nancy fell out of my bag, and Steve saw them. That’s why he broke my camera.

“We ran into him and his friends later while they were spraying up The Hawk. I didn’t know it was all Tommy Hagen’s idea, so I got in Steve’s face and I hit him first. He called me queer, and that’s shitty. But he apologized, saved our lives, and bought me a new camera. So–”

Jonathan turns to him and holds out his hand. It reminds Steve of his father, but also of Hopper, which he decides is a more apt comparison.

He reaches out and Jonathan grasps his hand firmly, shaking it up and down just once, yet continues to hold on. Forging a new pact for the future.

“Steve, I’m sorry about everything.” He seems genuine– eyes wet, shoulders set, and back straight. Steve tries to match his posture. He might not be as good with words as Jonathan, but he can at least show this moment is just as important to him. “But you helped protect the kids so we could save Will. And you saved Nancy and me. So– I trust you.”

Steve can’t handle this. It’s too early in the morning for heavy emotions and deep confessions, but Jonathan’s searching for forgiveness in the face of a former bully. Steve steps up to the plate and meets him halfway.

“I shouldn’t have broken your camera, I know how expensive they are and how much it meant to you. I was angry and I wasn’t thinking. And I, I umm–” 

Steve realizes he’s never really had to apologize to someone before. Sure he’s apologized to Nancy, but it seemed like a normal thing for guys to always apologize to their girlfriends. He’s apologized to Dustin, but that’s more like placating a rowdy toddler. 

This feels different, somehow bigger. Maybe it’s because Jonathan’s his own age, or someone his parents have programmed him to think is lesser than himself. Maybe it’s the deep regret that’s made itself a home in Steve’s stomach, rotting away at the memory of a vicious word spat haphazardly at a stranger.

“I’m sorry I called you queer. That’s fuc– I mean messed– up, and I’m sorry.” Steve sighs, running a nervous hand through his hair, less painful with the stitches removed. He almost misses the stinging sensation. “It’s something my dad says all the time and it was the first thing I thought of, and I hate that. I’m not my dad, I never want to be like him.”

Jonathan nods and pulls Steve forward into a hug, and when they separate Steve feels lighter. A heavy weight he hadn’t known about, removed from his shoulders with Jonathan’s help. If he didn’t know any better, he’d think Jonathan felt the same way by the smile on his face.

“Yeah!” Will shouts, unprompted and overly excited for the tone of this entire conversation. There’s a wide grin on his face when he holds up his hand to high-five Steve and cheers “welcome to the Bad Dads Club!”

Steve scoffs, shocked but completely delighted and confused at Will’s eager declaration. Joyce smacks her hand to her forehead and mutters something like jesus christ under her breath, while Jonathan barks out a laugh. 

He grabs his little brother by the shoulder and shakes him like a rag doll until Will breaks out into giggles. “Will,” Jonathan says, failing to keep a straight face, “remember when I explained the difference between family jokes and not-family jokes?”

Will’s smile fades slightly, red embarrassment splashing his cheeks as he quickly glances between Jonathan and Steve, realizing his social blunder. Jonathan squeezes his shoulder and gives him a sad, reassuring smile. But Steve won’t be the reason for the small frown tugging on Will’s lower lip.

Steve holds out his hand, palm up. He smiles at the kid, eyes alight with mischief. “Bad Dad’s Club,” Steve says, like it’s more than just a fucked up childhood and is instead forging a pact, binding them through one shitty commonality. 

Will returns his smile and high fives him, who then turns to his brother. Jonathan laughs again when he pulls Will in for a hug instead, shrugging at Steve.

Joyce’s gaze travels between the three boys standing in front of her, and Steve can see the moment she cracks.

Her stance has softened. Her lips are still pursed, her eyebrows only slightly furrowed, but her arms hang relaxed at her sides and she’s looking at Steve less like she wants to throw him out and more like she doesn’t know what to do with him.

“You get one week,” Joyce says sternly, pointing a finger in Steve’s face. He goes cross-eyed looking at it, but he can still see Will and Jonathan high-five. “One week of picking him up after school. I get done at Melvald’s at six, so you can bring him home at six-thirty.”

Before Steve can wholeheartedly agree, she rounds on Will and Jonathan next, who stand at attention, trying to stay serious through their own excitement. 

“You,” she points at Jonathan, “better keep your grades up if you’re getting a job.”

“And you,” she gestures to Will, “better have all of your homework done when you get home. If you can’t get it done at Steve’s house, then you don’t get to go.”

She backs away from them, taking a deep breath in and exhaling loudly. “Is all of that clear?”

Waves of yes’s pour from their mouths. Will wraps his arms around his mom’s waist and Jonathan lightly punches Steve’s shoulder. 

“Thank you, Ms. Byers,” Steve says as he turns to leave, “I’ll make sure you don’t regret this. Any of you.”

She sighs, a small sad smile on her face. “I really hope that’s true, Steve.”

On the drive home, he realizes she never mentioned the slip-up about his parents’ absence. He’s grateful for it. Talking with adults has never been his strong suit, and his conversations with each of the kids’ parents are starting to weigh on him. 

The Byers’ might not have as much money or means as the Harrington’s, but that doesn’t stop Joyce Byers from being a damn great mom. So he’s not surprised she took note of his own small mishaps. Maybe she’ll bring it up one day, maybe she won’t. All Steve cares about is that he finally has the opportunity to earn the trust of the fiercest parent he knows.

~~~

[willbyersabyss]

This shot has been discussed extensively about how it hints at byler and El eventually figuring it out, but I want to talk about the drawing just before this one. And maybe even consider a different context for this drawing too...

The drawings are completely different. This one has a wider head and the thought bubble is skinny. These two drawings symbolize different things.

So what does this version of the drawing mean? Well just listen to what El is saying. She says that Vecna is going to be in someone's mind, but the thought bubble that represents the mindscape is above Will. This means that Vecna is already in Will's mind. But Will doesn't feel him until he gets back to Hawkins... why? And why would Vecna be in Will's mind during the finale, but we never see? Well... we did.

The Upside Down is Will's mindscape. This is hinting at that. Vecna has been residing in the UD the entire season, and we do in fact see this in the finale.

If that didn't convince you then the next thing El says will. El mentions Terry and Billy who both have a shit ton of parallels to Will. Terry's mind loop sequence relates to Will (see here). Billy's name is literally William, he had an abusive father, and he was possessed, all things that relate to Will. Interesting thing to bring up while the mindscape bubble is above Will.

Terry's mind is in a loop/stuck in time and so is the Upside Down. Billy's mind was stuck in the memory with his mom on the beach. The Upside Down is stuck because of a memory. Will's memory.

Let's bring El's drawing back into it's original context for a second. The girl in the middle represents Max. The two figures in the mindscape are Vecna and El. But they're above Will. So Max's mindscape somehow also collided with Will's. When did this happen?

When she travelled to the Snow Ball. Vecna and El are both in her mind at the same time during the Snow Ball. This is when El's drawing comes true! And this is when it connects back to Will!

This is the only time we see the California crew once El reaches the Snow Ball memory. Will is almost entirely out of shot! We don't see his reaction at all here. Very convenient that we don't see even a snippet of how Will is feeling during the Snow Ball sequence. We only see him again once they go into Vecna's mindscape...

OK! But how do we know the Snow Ball memory connected to the UD at all? When Vecna showed up, so did the spores. It started rotting and turned dark just like the UD. The only thing that's missing is the vines which we see in Vecna's mindscape later.

(I already have another post explaining how Max's Snow Ball memory links to the UD being stuck in time here!)

Robin says that Nancy's house is frozen in time, not the entire UD. We honestly don't even know if the entire UD is stuck on the same day. It's entirely possible that the Wheeler house is stuck on November 6th, but other parts of the UD are stuck on other days. Why? Because Will travelled into a memory.

When Will got kidnapped, he was probably trying to think of happy memories because he was scared and accidentally ended up in a memory. This transformed a once rocky smoke land into Hawkins.

What memory? This is where the other byler drawing shot comes in. El's drawing lines up with Mike and Will here to represent how Will chose a happy memory with Mike (and others) to hide in when he got kidnapped. Not just a memory Mike is in, but MIKE'S HOUSE! We only saw evidence of the Wheeler house being stuck. So I think Will thought back to the most recent happy memory of the party playing DnD just before he got kidnapped. This would place Will at the Wheeler house and explain why it's stuck on that day.

If the rest of the UD is on different days, it's possible that Will mastered this trick and continued memory hopping until the entire UD transformed to replicate Hawkins. But if the entire UD is in fact stuck on the same day, maybe Will wandered too far out of the Wheeler house memory and this triggered the rest of the UD to look like Hawkins.

BUT I’ve also been recently pondering another theory. The UD isn't just Will's mindscape, but multiple, or a meeting place for mindscapes. Perhaps Vecna's collection of minds completed the Hawkins puzzle being pieced together in the UD. Will contributed first, but so did other victims. Evidence? Max's Snow Ball memory was already seen in the UD at the end of s2.

The Snow Ball decorations are there. This along with Robin's comment proves that the UD might not be entirely stuck on the same day. The Snow Ball decor shouldn't have been there if that were the case because the dance wasn't until December, not November. As I said in the other post I linked, Max travelling into her Snow Ball memory influenced the UD version to replicate it. There's some time paradox stuff happening here.

So basically: El's drawing hovering above Will was not only to hint at byler, but also to link him to the concept of memory travel, implying that he has done this before, despite us never seeing this occur… or did we?

[fel1ra]

Hi what are your predictions for Stranger Things S5?

(Or how would you write it?)

Hiiii thanks for the ask <3

Like of course I think that Byler will be canon. These two are gay and no one can convince me otherwise, like there’s just too much proof. As for how they will get together I really can't decide because so many people have made good predictions but I am a firm lettergate believer. I also think they won't get together until like the second to last episode or something.

I'm also really hoping to see some kind of interaction between Robin and Mike and/or Will and the original party being back together and doing shit will fix all my problems. 

Also like gimme Mike and Nancy interactions, like them awkwardly talking about feelings and maybe Mike coming out to her or asking her for advice about his relationship with El or something. 

Also I need Mike to get Vecna’d and I think that is actually more likely than Will simply because Will already has a connection to the upside down and Vecna might actually want Will alive. Torturing and trying to kill his best friend/love of his life on the other hand will probably be worse for him. It would also a beautiful way to see more of Mike’s thoughts and feelings. I NEED MIKE TO SUFFER (I love him, he’s my pookie)

[mags6422]

It Happened One November - Part 5

Part 4 | 0 | Part 6

Steve hangs back while the kids give the update on what has been going on on their end. There are enough of them all talking over each other like usual without him adding his two cents and it’s not like he had any observations that the kids wouldn’t have also caught.

Next up is Joyce and Hopper and Steve has a bit of a delayed freak out listening to their horror story from the lab. Did he really try fighting these things with a goddam baseball bat while they are capable of taking out armed guards?! Jesus they had gotten so freaking lucky! And that explained why Will was unconscious on the couch right now, since apparently he was possessed by some shadow monster who was now spying on us and would sick more demodogs on them as soon as he woke up.

Meanwhile it turns out Nancy has been off in Illinois with Jonathan, trying to get the lab shut down. Not that that’s going to be a problem anymore since everyone there is dead, killed by their own monsters which was poetic as hell but Steve can’t help but wish he had been there with Nancy. Actually, he took that back. If he was with Nancy then Dustin would have been on his own tracking Dart to the junkyard and he, Lucas and Max would have died, so maybe things were working out exactly as they were meant to. Didn’t make it hurt less.

The kids are getting out one of their nerd books, talking about a Mind Flayer (sounds fake but ok) but Steve can’t take his eyes off Nancy, who is looking at Jonathan, who is staring at Will. And shit, Steve knows he’s not the brightest crayon in the box when it comes to book smarts but if there’s one thing he does know how to read it’s people and something definitely happened on that little field trip. Steve can still feel the electricity in the air around Nancy, just like he told Dustin, but it’s sure as hell not aimed at him anymore. Eventually, Steve feels eyes on the back of his own head and turns to see Billy staring at him.

Shit, Billy. This whole Upside Down business sure made for strange bedfellows. This time last year, Steve would have been at a kegger tonight with Tommy and Carol. Now here he is at the weirdest decorated house party ever (seriously, is no one going to bring up the walls?) with his highschool bully, Nancy the Priss, Jonathan the Loner, Police Chief Hopper and a bunch of 13 year olds and their mom. 

Remembering Billy’s panic attack out front, Steve reached out a hand to the back of Billy’s neck in what he hoped was a comforting gesture. God knows he would have appreciated the same his first go around. Billy’s face goes red and he looks away but doesn’t shrug him off so Steve counts it as a win and tunes back into the rest of them. 

Everyone (read: Joyce and Mike) are convinced that Will is still in there somewhere with the Mind Flayer so they decide to question him and see if he has any bright ideas. This means turning the Byers shed into an interrogation room which is weird as hell but whatever, Steve stopped asking questions he might not want to know the answer to a long time ago and just follows orders. 

Every interaction that he has with Nancy just hurts. She can barely look at him and he knows something happened with Jonathan, but the end of the world is not the time to start relationship drama so he keeps his mouth shut even though his heart breaks a little more every time he sees her. 

It does feel good to hear how she liked how he protected the kids. That was the first thing that he’s done in a long time that he feels proud of. That he knows he did well . That and going back into the Byers the first time around to save Nancy and Jonathan. 

Billy doesn’t say much as they clear out the shed but he does find an old wood axe on a shelf in there and Steve sees his eyes light up as he gives it a few experimental swings. Steve meets his eye and gives him a grin and a wink. He knows how much better it feels to have a weapon in your hand when weird shit is going down. Billy grins back and hefts it over his shoulder, looking way more like the Billy he sees swaggering down the halls at school than he has all night. Not something that Steve thought he would be missing but here we are. 

“Looks good on you,” He offers as he walks by, his arms weighed down by a couple boxes of random crap. “It still sharp?”

Billy blushes again and thumbs the edge with a smirk, his tongue poking out as usual “Oh yeah, this’ll do.” He’s licking his lips like he can already taste the violence in the air. 

Steve dumps his current load and walks back over, settling his hand on Billy’s shoulder to make sure he’s paying attention. “Listen, when those things come back, which they definitely will,” Billy’s eyes look almost eager at this, like he can’t wait for the fight, “You take the right side, I’ll take the left. We keep the kids in the middle and stay out of Hop and Nancy’s way, got it?”

“Nancy?” Steve doesn’t bother trying to explain the mind fuck that is Nancy with her pastels and pearls cooly leveling her gun at eldritch monsters. 

“Especially Nancy. Just, trust me, ok? You got the play?” it’s something that he’s said a million times in a huddle on the basketball court.

Billy laughs and claps him on the other shoulder “Yeah, captain, I got the play.” There is a spark of… something in his eyes now. Something that pulled on Steve’s chest, made his fingertips tingle and his heart skip a beat. “You and me, pretty boy, let's kick some ass.”

Part 4 | 0 | Part 6

Read the whole series on AO3

[hbyrde36]

Life is a Game (and True Love is a Trophy)

Chapter 2

Ch 1 ao3 link

*Eddie - 1986*

Dustin burst in the door without knocking. A habit Eddie had been trying to break him out of for years. One of these days he’d do it at the wrong time and see something he’ll wish he hadn’t. Maybe then he’d learn his lesson.

“So, don’t freak out but…”

“Ugh” Eddie groaned, pushing his face further into his pillow. “It’s never good when you start a sentence like that. At least let me get some coffee first.”

“Fine.” Dustin relented, stomping back out into the kitchen of the Munson trailer.

Ten minutes later and with coffee in hand, Eddie motioned for Dustin to continue with whatever nonsense he’d woken him up for this morning.

“I told the guys about Steve, about you knowing him.”

“Dustin!” Eddie shouted, incredulously.

“What? It’s not like it’s some big secret or something!”

“You didn’t know!”

“No, I didn't. But I should have realized, and I shouldn’t have said what I did the other night about him. That wasn’t cool. That’s why I told them, because I felt bad, and because I was thinking that maybe we could do a little investigation of our own?”

The kid meant well and it was sweet that he wanted to do something to make Eddie feel better, but what did he think he and a bunch of teenagers would be able to do about it?

Eddie shook his head. “I already told you man, his parents are loaded. I’m sure they left no stone unturned. What could we possibly do that they haven't already tried?”

Dustin’s face spread into a cocky grin. “For starters, Mike talked to Nancy. Did you know she dated Steve for a little while right around the time Will got lost in the woods?”

He had known that actually. In fact he vividly remembered catching the two of them in the boy’s bathroom that one time. He’d never thought about it in reference to Steve’s disappearance before though. The couple had broken up a few months before it happened.

“Yea, okay. So, they dated. What’s that got to do with anything?”

“I'm not sure if it does, but the police never even talked to her. Mike said she was willing to talk to us about him, if you want.”

Eddie couldn’t believe he was actually considering this, but it was hard to deny how intrigued he was to learn more about Steve. Even if it didn’t lead to any answers about what had happened to him.

“You know what? Fuck it. Let's do it.” Eddie declared, slamming his now empty cup down on the table for emphasis.

“Language! I am a child!.” Dustin gasped, in a dramatic impersonation of his mother.

“Shut it, nerd.”

“You literally play D&D with children! Who’s the nerd now?!”

-

Eddie had never really had a full conversation with Nancy. They said hi in passing, and whenever he came to the house to play with the boys of course, but that was the extent of it. Now he was supposed to sit here in the Wheeler’s basement, like it was any other day, and talk to her about her ex boyfriend. Awkward.

Or, maybe not. 

According to Dustin, Nancy knew all about their game, including how she, Steve, and many others were used as characters in it. She understood their curiosity. She herself had always thought that there was something suspicious about the whole thing. That maybe there was more going on in Hawkins than a single missing boy.

“Do you remember the day in the cafeteria, when Steve got into that screaming match with Tommy and Carol?”

Eddie shook his head. “No, but I heard it was brutal.” He’d skipped out early that day to meet up with Rick for more product. The whole school was buzzing about it the next day, he could have kicked himself for missing the show.

“It was. I was shocked. I had never seen him act like that. I know he and I hadn’t been together that long, so I could be wrong, but It seemed so out of character. I mean, everything he said was true, and those two probably deserved it, but the three of them had been best friends for years. He never stood up to them before, so why now? It felt like it came out of nowhere.” 

She paused, taking a breath and gathering her thoughts before continuing.

“I remember him looking at me, just before he stormed off when it was all over. He didn’t look mad, it was more like.. I don’t know, scared, maybe?”

Well, that was a little ominous. Eddie and the younger boys shared a look as Nancy got up from her seat on the couch and started pacing.

“He called me later that night and asked me to come over so we could talk. When I got there, he stepped out onto the porch instead of letting me come inside. I didn’t think anything of it at the time, but looking back, it was a little odd. We sat on the steps and he said that he was sorry, but he couldn’t see me anymore. I asked him if there was someone else, but he said no. He just wanted to be single for a while and concentrate on other things. It was fine. I don’t think either of us were too upset about it. We hugged and said our goodbyes, and that was the last time I spoke to him.”

She stopped pacing, standing directly in front of Eddie as she finished her story.

“I still saw him around, of course, and heard about how he quit the school teams. Which seemed weird, because, what was this more important thing he was focusing on? Clearly it wasn’t sports. Then he started skipping school, so it wasn’t about his grades either. I started to wonder if maybe he had gotten into drugs or something.” 

Or, he could have just been lying to let you down easy, Eddie thought, but that wasn’t very kind. Instead he said, “If he was, he wasn't getting them from me.” 

Dustin gasped. “Wait, dude, are you really a drug dealer?”

Fuck. “Um. No?”

“You are! You’re totally a drug dealer!” Dustin said, bouncing in his seat and pointing a finger in Eddie’s face.

Eddie groaned. “Please stop yelling ‘drug dealer’ before Mike's parents hear you and kick me out!”

“Does that mean you smoke pot?” Lucas asked.

 “Can we smoke pot?” Mike added quickly, grinning.

“Absolutely not!” Eddie and Nancy shouted, simultaneously.

He turned to her, hands raised. “For the record, I don’t sell anymore. Not since my supplier went to jail.”

Dustin’s eyes widened slightly. “Oh shit, is Reefer Rick a real person?”

Nancy gave Eddie a hard look.

“What?! We all used people from our life in the game!” He said defensively. “Look, guys, I think we’re getting off track here.”

“Is there anything else weird you remember about Steve from before he disappeared?” Will asked Nancy, speaking for the first time. Eddie threw him a grateful smile.

“Not that I can think of.”

“What about his parents?” Lucas asked.

“I never met them, but he always said his dad was an asshole. The way he talked sometimes, it sounded like they weren’t around a lot.”

The image of it flashed in Eddie’s mind for a moment. Steve, all by himself in that big empty house of his. Haunting its hallways in the middle of the night. He shook his head roughly to clear it. 

Maybe it was silly to think of it that way. What teenage boy wouldn’t love having the house to himself? No one hassling you or telling you what to do. He couldn’t explain why, but somehow he didn’t think Steve liked being alone.

Eddie was startled when Nancy placed a hand on his arm. She looked at him, face pinched with concern. He realized suddenly that they were alone. He’d been so lost in thought that he didn’t realize the boys had left. She saw him looking around and explained.

“I sent the boys upstairs for lunch. It looked like you needed a minute.”

“Yea, sorry. I don’t know what’s wrong with me lately.” He got up to collect his things, and headed towards the basement steps.

“It’s the time of year. I get it, I've been thinking about him a lot too.” She said, following him.

Eddie shook his head. It wasn’t the same, she was allowed to think about Steve. To miss him. What right did Eddie have? “That’s different. You dated the guy. We weren’t even friends.”

“You’re allowed to miss him, Eddie.”

“No, I'm not.”

“He thought you were brave, y’know.”

“What?” He stopped walking, but couldn’t bring himself to turn around to face her. 

“He told me once, the first time I sat with him for lunch. You had jumped up on your table, ranting and raving about whatever had bothered you that day.” She sounded amused at the memory. “Tommy and the others sneered and complained, but not Steve. He smiled as he watched you. He said, ‘sometimes I wish I could be brave like that. Just stop caring about what everyone else thinks and be free’.”

He finally looked back at her over his shoulder. She smiled at him kindly, it seemed genuine so he returned the gesture.

“Thanks, Wheeler.”

-

Eddie didn’t stay to join the boys for lunch, though he did make plans to meet up with them the next day. He needed some time alone to process what they’d learned so far. He did his best thinking in the van, so he drove around town aimlessly, blasting Metallica and trying to sort through it all. 

Eventually he made his way to Loch Nora, slowing when he reached Steve’s street. He’d never been inside the Harrington house, but he knew where it was. There was no car in the driveway, so he rolled to a stop in front of it. A ‘For Sale’ sign was stuck in the grass a few feet to the right of the mailbox.

He hadn’t realized Steve’s parents were selling the place. Good, Eddie thought. It would make his next task that much easier. He’d come up with a plan, of sorts, as he cruised around Hawkins. The first step? A good old fashioned breaking and entering.   

-

*Steve - 1983/1984*

Two days after finding Eleven out in the woods, Steve cut ties with all his friends. He made a big scene out of calling Tommy and Carol assholes in the middle of the cafeteria, to really drive the point home. He turned himself into a social pariah overnight, anything to keep people from wanting to get close to him.  

He let Nancy go. It was easy enough. He found that he wasn’t even all that upset about it, he knew she wouldn't be too sad either. He’d seen how she looked at Jonathan that day at school, when the news broke that Will was missing. They would get together before too long, he was sure of it.

He quit the swim team, basketball, and only continued going to school because dropping out would be too suspicious. He started skipping days a lot. 

-

Eleven, who he’d taken to calling El for short, needed her own space. He would have loved to decorate the guest room for her, would have let her paint the walls and everything. Unfortunately, his parents still came home on occasion, and it would be too hard to hide. Instead, they worked together to fix up a space for her in the attic. Even when they were home, his parents never went up there. 

He didn’t know anything about little girls, but neither did El, so they figured things out together. He set her up with a T.V. to keep her company when he was gone during the day. He gave her a bunch of catalogs to look through, and told her to take a marker and circle anything she liked. Clothes, bedding, curtains, toys, he bought it all. Perks of the Harrington name, and a credit card with a high spending limit.

By the time her attic room was done, she finally felt secure enough to sleep in her own bed. She felt safe in the knowledge that her new brother wouldn’t abandon her as she slept, or lock her inside. Sometimes though, he would wake up to find she’d come into his room in the middle of the night. Almost always when it rained.

They quickly became a little family, he and El. Steve didn’t have any siblings, hadn’t thought he even liked kids, and certainly never knew how much he wanted a little sister until she came along. He taught her what he knew about the world, and in return he learned the importance of patience and kindness.  Together, they discovered unconditional love. 

For a few wonderful months, life was good. There was a little hiccup in January of ‘84, when eleven accidentally knocked a vase off the counter in the kitchen. It was fine. She caught it with her mind before it hit the floor, then levitated it back upright on the counter. It was the first time she’d used her powers in front of Steve. Powers he had been completely unaware of.

He’d hyperventilated for a while, but once he recovered he explained to her that, ‘No sweetie, I didn’t know you could do that, but it’s fine. I promise. No, I'm not afraid of you. It’s just another part of you, and I love who you are.’

It was another turning point for them, a catalyst that compelled her to explain more about where she came from. What sort of things they did to her at the lab, and she finally told him all about Papa and the other children. 

Steve had never pushed her on any of it, happy to just keep her safe, and wait until she was ready to talk. Once she did? Well, he was fucking livid. It was all he could do not to go to the newspapers, or Chief Hopper, and blow the whole thing wide open. Hell, he would have found the place himself and burnt it to the ground if he didn’t know for a fact that there were other kids living inside. 

In the end, he did nothing. Too afraid that if he was caught, or worse, there would be no one who knew about El, or where she was. There would be no one to take care of her.

-

It was all his fault. He should have known better. It was his job to take care of her, and he had failed in that task spectacularly. It was spring break 1984, Easter Sunday. He’d just wanted to take her out to breakfast, something he could remember doing with his own parents for the holiday when he was young. Back when they at least pretended to give a shit about him. 

They were as safe about it as they could have been. He picked a small restaurant two towns over, where no one would recognize them. She looked so happy when she smiled at him over her massive stack of waffles.

He didn’t see it for what it was, when the two nondescript white work vans pulled into the parking lot of the diner. Movies had him envisioning a legion of fancy black town cars pulling up on him one day, a swarm of dark suits surrounding him, demanding to know where the girl was. He should have known that Papa would be a bit more subtle.

The bell above the main entrance door dinged as a new customer entered. El looked up reflexively at the sound and her eyes went wide. It was the only warning Steve had before a tall man with white hair and an impeccably tailored gray suit slid into the booth next to him.

“Hello, Eleven. You’re looking well.”

Steve watched as she curled in on herself. Turning back into the little girl he found in the woods right before his eyes. 

“Papa.” She gasped, bottom lip trembling.

The man turned to look at Steve. “I’m Dr. Brenner. Now, don’t go getting any big ideas, young man. I have people on every door to this place. You’ll never make it to that pretty car of yours in time, and I can assure you that if you try, they will not hesitate to... deal with the situation.”

Steve froze, not remotely prepared for this scenario. He didn’t know what to do and was scared of making a misstep. He wasn’t afraid for himself, he didn’t care what happened to him, but he was terrified for El, and the possibility of losing his sister forever. 

“Here’s what's going to happen.” Brenner continued. “Eleven is going to leave this place with me, right now. You, Mr. Harrington, yes I know all about you, are going to go back to your life and forget that any of this ever happened. If you so much as think about telling anyone what you’ve seen, we will know, and we will come for you.”

“I’m not going to just let you take her.” Steve protested, heart pounding.

“You don’t have a say in the matter.”

“If you take her then you’ll have to take me too!” Steve raised his voice a little too loudly, drawing the attention of the other diners. 

“That’s not an option.” Brenner hissed. “I have no need for someone like you”

Steve lowered his voice to a whisper, knowing that angering the man further wasn’t going to help. “I’m not leaving her. I’ll die first. You’ll have to kill me right here and now in front of all these people. Do you really want to make that big of a scene?”

Steve could tell the man was considering it. “Please.“ He begged. “I'm sure you can find some use for me. I’ll do anything.”

Brenner sighed. “Very well. You will both follow me outside. Leave your car keys on the table, Steven, you won’t be needing them.”

The man slid out of the booth, threw more cash than necessary on the table, and walked out the door.

Steve scrambled out of his seat at the same time El did, and they collided in a desperate embrace. She was shaking, crying. Steve ran his fingers through her short curls. 

“I'm sorry El, I'm so sorry. I shouldn’t have brought you here.”

She looked up at him, blinking through tears. “It’s not your fault, they would have found me eventually, one way or another.”

“I’ll get us out of this somehow, I promise.”

She took a small step away from him and shook her head. “No, Steve. You have to let him take me. Only me. You have a life, parents, a family.”

He shook his head, taking her small hand in his. “You are my family El. I’m not leaving you. We’re in this together. You and me, always.”

Chapter 3

@penny00dreadful @buckleybarnes @steddie-there @yeahhhh-suga @goinsteddie @brbsoulnomming @the-s-is-silent @paintsplatteredandimperfect @estrellami-1 @herebedragons404 @epiclazershark @iaminmultiplefandoms @adaed5 @mentallyundone @hardboiledleggs @hotshot9 @manda-panda-monium

[morganski-19]

Chills Right to the Marrow Part 54

ao3 link| part 1 . . . part 51, part 52, part 53

“And just as you enter the cavern,” Will narrates, are sweeping across the board, “a gust of wind blows out your torches, covering you in darkness. Somewhere in the distance, you can hear the low grumble of the monster that terrorized the town.”

They all look at him, waiting for him to continue. Instead, he stands straight again, starting to take down his board. “And I think that’s a good time to stop.”

“Come on,” Lucas groans, falling back in his chair. “You can’t leave us there.”

“How much longer of the campaign do we have?” Dustin asks. “We’ve been playing for weeks now, we could try to finish it tonight.”

Mike shakes his head. “Even if that was possible, it’s late. My mom is dragging me back to school shopping tomorrow.”

Dustin shoves his stuff in his backpack. “Already? We still have a few weeks until school starts.”

“Yeah, but she just wants to go and get it over with.”

They pack up their stuff, saying goodbye to Mrs. Byers on their way out. Mike hangs back while Lucas and Dustin get their bikes. Talking to Will, laughing about something they can’t hear.

“God, this is taking forever,” Lucas complains.

Dustin shrugs. “Will said he’s been working on it for months. It’s not that surprising.”

“Not the campaign. I meant that” Lucas points to Mike and Will.

Dustin looks at them and rolls his eyes. The two of them have been dancing around each other all summer.

“When is he going to get the balls to ask him out, already?” Lucas whispers. “It’s getting painful at this point.”

“He’s just scared, he’ll get there eventually.”

“But why does eventually have to take this long? I swear if I have to sit through one more movie night of them sitting next to each other way too close, and getting all embarrassed when they get caught looking at each other, I’m going to go insane.”

“Why are you going insane?” Mike asks, picking up his bike off the grass and wheeling it to the street.

Lucas catches up to him, slapping him on the arm. “Where are you going to ask him out already? He totally likes you back.”

Mike’s face turns bright pink. “I, just, I don’t know. I’m scared, I guess.”

“Dude, come on. It’s Will.”

“Yeah, I know that, that’s why I’m scared.”

Dustin keeps quiet. Listening to their argument over the soft hum of his bike’s wheels. They would get there on their own time, he knew that. Ever since both Will and Mike admitted to him what they were feeling, it was inevitable. They fit, it just made sense.

It was just another thing that was going to change. Mike and El broke up back in April, but that didn’t really feel like a breakup. They were already apart, physically, for so long, they were able to just pick back up and go back to just friends. It was nice to have a group where it was mostly friends, and Dustin didn’t feel like he was third wheeling.

But then Will told Dustin, Mike slowly figured it out, and Lucas will not stop until they get together. Nancy is getting ready for college. Robin is staying, but only for the year. Wayne and Eddie are moving into a house. Steve is moving. Dustin is still just Dustin. Nothing changing, forever the same.

Everything keeps changing. Everything keeps moving. He feels like he has to too. But nothing he does feels like growth. Feels like movement. He just feels the same. If his younger self were to stand next to him right now, they would look identical. The only change was Dustin was older. Taller. Supposedly more mature.

It’s odd how he can look at everyone else and see all the ways they’ve changed, and see none of it himself. Maybe it’s because he just can’t see it, or maybe he wants to believe it never happened. For a moment, maybe, if he could just look through younger his eyes, the world would be brighter. The air would be fresher. Time would feel less exhausting.

“Did you guys know Steve’s moving?” he asks, still walking next to his bike.

They stop and turn to look back at him. “What,” they ask in unison.

“His parents are selling the house, he’s moving.”

“What about Eddie?” Mike asks.

“They got a house. They’re moving into it in a few weeks.”

“Wow,” Lucas says. “Summer really is almost over, isn’t it.”

Mike rolls his eyes. “That is the most cliché thing you have ever said.”

“It’s true,” he defends. “Before we know it, it’ll be Halloween, then November, then we’re back to March, and it’s the fourth again. It starts to feel normal and then we get hit with something that throws us back a few years. Can’t blame me for wanting to stay in this peace for a little longer.”

He’s right. After the fourth, and everything died down, it started to feel like a real summer. Will and Mike made the campaign, and they’ve been playing it. There were movie nights and sleepovers. Days at the arcades and trying to sneak into the R rated films. Stuff normal teenagers do. Stuff they normally did.

But there was this tension, this wait for the other shoe to drop. For someone to wake up screaming, or something to spark that creep up Will’s next. El’s been searching, trying to look for any clue that they were wrong. That there was a chance they didn’t properly kill it this time.

There was nothing. No indicators. No signs. Pure silence.

Silence was never a good thing. It leaves space for the brain to find something to obsess over, or create. Never quite giving the peace that it is supposed to promise.

Dustin didn’t like the silence. He wanted there to be something in the background. Music, conversations, white noise. Something to fill the space and call him back to reality. Instead of his mind wandering free.

“Do you ever think that one day we’ll wake up and just forget everything? Go about life like everyone who doesn’t know?” Dustin asks, voice almost in a whisper.

It’s almost this reflex he has, to fix everything. To find that off switch. Find a way to get back to normal.

“I don’t think we’ll forget,” Mike starts, a scared hopefulness in his voice. “I just think it might not hurt as much. Like it’ll fade into a distant memory, and we only remember it every once in a while.”

“Yeah,” Lucas agrees. “Like I don’t even remember the first time as much anymore. Not as much as I used to, at least.”

Mike nods, it doesn’t help.

Something in Dustin can’t let go of the idea that he’ll never forget. That this is something that will always haunt him.

“Hey,” Lucas puts a hand on his shoulder. “No matter what, we go through this together.”

“Right.” Mike agrees.

Dustin’s glad he still has them. That after all they’d been through, their friendship stayed the same. Still just as close as they were back in middle school. Different, but the same.

“Yeah,” Dustin says, voice returning to its lightness.

Different, but the same. He hasn’t thought about it like that before.

tag list (closed): @the-they-who-nerded, @insteviewetrust, @croatoan-like-its-hot, @jettestar,

@tinyplanet95, @steddie-as-they-go, @slv-333, @littlecelestialmoth, @thatonebadideapanda,

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@papergrenade, @waelkyring, @sweetheartprincess28, @katouasobj, @astercomoasflores

[steddieas-shegoes]

Hi friend! 👋 I’d like to submit a request, if I may. It’s not an original prompt, I don’t know where I first saw it, but I haven’t seen an actual fic with this premise yet.

Will comes out to Nancy who goes “I know nothing about this BUT I know someone who does” and brings him to Eddie, who brings both of them (bc let’s be honest Nancy isn’t letting Will out of her sight alone with Eddie) to a gay bar in Indy. Lo and behold who do they see but Steve and Robin. And it’s obvious to those who know what to look for (Eddie) that they’re both looking to get lucky. Steddie endgame (obvs lol) but maybe some Byler as well if you want/can swing it..?

I love everything I’ve read from you so far and I’m sure I’ll love everything you come up with! ❤️ thank you!!!

My star ✨✨✨ This is a future fic, but not future enough for Will to be 21 (I'm gonna put him at 19, almost 20 here so still like a tiny baby but also an adult). The first part of this is definitely Will focused, but there is more focus on Steddie at the bar itself. - Mickala ❤️

-------------------------------------------

“Nancy? Um, can I talk to you?”

Will had been working himself up to this for weeks, months really. He came out to Jonathan and his mom officially last weekend, though they both already knew.

He wasn’t exactly good at hiding it, and around them, he didn’t really try.

But Nancy Wheeler was smart, and she was quick to come to conclusions, and probably already had figured it out.

Plus, she was decent at giving advice, and could possibly give him some insight into how Mike felt if he felt anything at all.

That was why he was here, coming out to her, being brave.

“Of course,” Nancy replied, smiling comfortingly.

She knew. He knew she knew. But he had to say it out loud, he had to get it out there to other people.

“I just have to tell you something that’s like, a big deal, and hopefully it doesn’t bother you, but also I don’t want it to be a big deal. It doesn’t have to be, actually. I just-”

“Will,” Nancy placed her hand on his shoulder, looked up at him with a knowing smirk. “Just say it.”

“I’m gay.”

There. He said it. It’s done.

Nancy nodded once, like she was confirming that she heard him, but she already knew, which was what he expected.

“Anything else?”

“Um. I’m in love with Mike?”

“Yeah, that’s pretty obvious. Anything else?”

“What do you mean it’s pretty obvious? I thought I hid it okay!”

Nancy laughed. She actually laughed.

“The only person who doesn’t notice that you’re in love with Mike, is Mike, and that’s had a few close calls. And before you ask, I have no idea how he feels. I know he’s in denial about his sexuality, so once he clears that up, who knows. But for now, let’s focus on you. What do you need from me?”

Nancy had a “let’s get down to business” attitude that Will respected, that everyone respected, but she sometimes forgot that not everything was business.

“Well, I guess just…support?”

Nancy raised her brows.

“That’s it? You already had that.”

“I guess maybe…advice?”

“I mean, I really don’t have any for Mike. He’s an enigma even to me,” she started.

“No. I mean, it would be helpful to have it, yes, but just. In general?” Will interrupted, a blush covering his cheeks.

“Oh! About…” she trailed off as she realized what he was asking.

“Okay, well I don’t know anything about that or really anything, but I know who does!” Nancy clapped her hands together.

—-------------

“Eddie?” Will asked as they stood on his porch, waiting for him to answer the door.

“Uh-huh.”

“Eddie’s gay?”

“Well, he’s bisexual, but he would be the one who knows the most,” she answered.

“Prettier Wheeler! What a surprise!” Eddie exclaimed when he opened the door. “And my favorite Byers! Were we supposed to be doing something tonight? Fuck, did I forget something? Wayne is convinced the bats ate the part of my brain that holds memory, even though they didn’t even bite my head.”

Eddie was a rambler, sort of like Robin, but he usually at least made some sense.

“No, no you didn’t forget anything. Will just needs some guidance on something,” Nancy said as she pushed her way into the trailer. “Is Wayne home?”

“Uh. Nope. Come on in, I guess,” he said, nodding at Will.

Once they were all settled on the couch and chair, Nancy gestured for Will to tell Eddie.

Will wasn’t prepared for it, but he knew he could trust him, especially if what Nancy said was true.

“I’m gay.”

It was getting easier to say out loud, just like it had been easier to say to himself when he first realized it and started letting himself think it every day.

“Amazing! Was that a secret?” Eddie asked, somewhat confused.

“Apparently not as much of one as I thought. But yeah, just my mom, Jonathan, Nancy, and you know. Officially, anyway.”

“So you have a boyfriend? Is that why you’re coming out?”

“No. I haven’t-”

“Oh, so Mike hasn’t gotten it together yet?” Eddie asked, playing with his rings distractedly.

“Nope. But it’s gonna take a big moment for that to happen. Will just needs some guidance on other stuff,” Nancy said.

“Oh! Like sex?”

Will was as red as he could possibly be.

“No! Not sex. Just, like, being gay I guess.”

Eddie looked between Will and Nancy a few times.

“Right. So let’s go,” he said as he stood up, making his way to his bedroom at the end of the hall.

Will and Nancy looked at each other, then back to where Eddie disappeared.

Before they could say anything, Eddie was back in the room, his new denim battle vest pulled on, and his boots laced up.

“Let’s go. Got places to be, queers to see!” Eddie yelled as he started moving out the front door.

“What the hell,” Nancy shrugged, getting up and following him out the door.

“What is happening,” Will said to himself as he followed them both.

—--------------

What was happening was that Eddie was taking him to a queer bar on the outskirts of downtown Indianapolis.

He’d heard of the place during his very little research of the local scene. He’d heard it was shut down twice in the 70s because of police raids, but now it was mostly just a quiet, safe place for queer people to be themselves.

The bar was laid back, only two bartenders even on the busiest nights, usually just pouring draft beers and the occasional martini. A jukebox in the corner never stopped playing, even when they only had a handful of customers.

A sign at the door said “THIRSTY THURSDAY: QUENCH YOUR THIRST AT THE BAR AND ON THE DANCE FLOOR!”

Will felt a little out of his element as he took in the amount of people crowding the bar, the tables, the small dancing area that really couldn’t even be considered a dancefloor.

Eddie seemed right at home, and he explained it was because he came pretty regularly, usually just to try to convince the owner to let his band play sometime, but he’d managed a few bathroom hookups along the way.

Will couldn’t hide his blush at that thought, knowing that he was in a place where that would not only be possible, but that it would be encouraged, maybe even expected had his mind fantasizing.

He welcomed it; Anything to get rid of the thoughts of Mike, who would probably never get his head out of his ass even if Will came out to him.

“Alright, one drink rule for the kiddo!” Eddie said as he walked to the bar with a hop to his step.

He was always exuberant, but he just seemed light here.

Will kept looking around, taking it all in.

Nancy suddenly grabbed his arm, and when he looked over, her eyes were huge.

He followed her line of sight, only getting distracted for a moment by a very attractive man who looked to be about his age.

His eyes settled on Steve and Robin.

In a queer bar.

In Indy.

“Is that-”

“It is.”

“But-”

“Uh-huh.”

Eddie came up behind them, drinks in hand.

“Alright, drink up! Take the edge off and then you can have some wonderful experiences- what are you two looking at?” Eddie looked over and his eyes widened. “Not possible.”

“It’s them.”

“But, they aren’t. Are they?”

Eddie squinted, looking at the way they were standing, what they were wearing, the way Steve was open to the room, not turned towards Robin.

“Oh my God,” he said.

“What?” Nancy’s head whipped towards him.

“How did I miss it? I spend so much time- but, no. He- and she- no.”

“Eddie, you aren’t making any sense! What?” Nancy whisper-yelled, as if anyone could hear them over the sound of everyone else talking and the music playing.

“They’re both queer! They’re here lookin’ for someone!”

“That’s impossible. Steve is the straightest person I know. I think even Mike knows he’s more likely to-” Nancy was cut off by Will hitting her arm. “What?”

“Robin just looked over here.”

“Shit.”

“Shit.”

They all looked at each other, panic in their eyes, as they realized it was only a matter of moments before they were completely caught here.

But, really, what was there to worry about? They were here, without knowing anyone they knew would be here, clearly looking for someone.

Will turned back to them, watching as Steve and Robin both looked at them with wide eyes.

“Might as well go talk to them,” he said before walking towards them, not waiting for Nancy or Eddie to agree.

“O…kay,” Eddie sighed before following.

Nancy followed silently, and Eddie didn’t really have time to figure out what her face was doing because Steve and Robin ended up meeting them halfway.

“Hi guys!” Robin waved, awkward as always, maybe more so because of where they were. “Kinda weird seeing you here, right? Like in Indy? Or in a bar? Since Will is underage! And also this is a pretty specific establishment, so-”

“What Robin means is,” Steve starts, lines in his forehead making him look more serious than he needs to be. “Why are you in a queer bar in Indianapolis?”

Robin smacked Steve’s arm, but he didn’t even flinch, crossing his arms in front of his chest.

Like he was ready to protect Robin.

And himself.

“Well, this happens to be one of my favorite bars, and Will needed to be in this type of environment for the first time, ya know?” Eddie said in a way that would definitely give away more if Robin and Steve were actually here because they were queer.

“So you’re…” Steve relaxed slightly.

“I am. Are you?”

“Um. Yeah. Yep. I am.”

“Me too,” Robin added.

“Yeah, so am I,” Will said.

All of them looked to Nancy, who suddenly seemed to catch up to the conversation.

“Oh! Um, not me! I don’t think. I’m just here for support!” She had never looked or sounded as nervous as she was in this moment.

“So how’s the crowd today?” Eddie asked.

To be honest, Eddie hadn’t bothered trying to find a hookup here for months.

The reason?

The man standing in front of him: Steve Harrington.

He’d tried, really he had.

But every time he thought he would get beyond basic flirting with someone, he thought about the way Steve sometimes touched his arm or his shoulder for longer than he needed to when he passed by him, and the way Steve would rest his head on his shoulder during movie nights, or the way he sometimes looked at him like he wanted to devour him.

Like he was right now.

Eddie would be nervous about it, but he doesn’t think Steve actually means anything by it.

He just has a very intense stare sometimes.

“Eddie!”

“Sorry! What?” He turned to see Robin and Will giving him knowing looks. “What?”

“I’m gonna take Nancy and Will over to a table that just opened up. You coming?” Robin asked.

“Sure, in a minute. Gonna run to the bathroom first,” he said, ignoring the way Steve was still watching him.

He walked away before anyone else could say anything.

He just needed a minute or two to collect himself.

The realization that Robin and Steve were here for the same reasons he was was probably going to need more than a minute or two, but he could deal with it later.

The bathroom of this place wasn’t the best, probably hadn’t been properly cleaned since the place opened, but it also wasn’t the worst place to have a minor breakdown.

He didn’t cry, but it was damn close.

It was overwhelming to know that there were others in their little group like him, but it was also just a lot to take in that those other people included Steve.

He heard the bathroom door open behind him, but he didn’t look up, just assumed it was someone else from the bar.

He stood at the sink, looking down, gathering himself to go back out and pretend this was entirely normal when a hand gripped his waist.

His head shot up and he looked in the mirror to see Steve’s reflection looking back at him, a hesitant smile on his face.

“Hey.”

“Hi.”

They stared at each other in the mirror, silent except for their breathing and the muffled sound of the music from outside the bathroom.

“I didn’t know you were…”

“Me either,” Eddie said quickly.

“You didn’t know you were queer?”

“No! No. Wait. I did know that. I knew it a long time ago. I mean I didn’t know you were,” Eddie clarified, unable to properly focus on anything except the way Steve’s hand felt on his side.

His thumb was rubbing circles against his shirt, the fabric bunching up little by little.

“It’s a new-ish discovery.”

“How new?”

Steve looked down at where his hand was resting on Eddie, then back up, his face red.

“March.”

“Oh?”

Eddie caught up quickly, realized what was happening, and definitely didn’t want it to stop even though he wasn’t sure how far he wanted it to go in the bar bathroom.

“Yeah. This annoying guy who was trying to steal Dustin from me decided to get involved in all our fucked up shit and Robin informed me that the way I was acting and talking about him wasn’t very heterosexual. Her words, not mine.” Steve smirked. “So, I kinda just admitted to myself I was into him and now I’m here.”

“Oh. Is the guy at this bar right now?”

“Yeah. He is.”

Eddie turned around and pushed Steve against the bathroom door as gently as he could.

“You’ve been driving me mad for years, Stevie. You know that?”

“Years?” Steve gulped, but kept smiling.

“Years. And now you’ve given me all that I need to do something about it.”

“Have I?”

Eddie answered him with a kiss.

It wasn’t spectacular, wasn’t even that good as far as kisses go.

Steve seemed caught off guard, like he hadn’t actually expected Eddie to take what was right in front of him, take control.

But then he caught up.

His hands gripped Eddie’s hips tight, the rest of his body relaxing against the wall as Eddie crowded against him further, their fronts touching from head to feet.

Their second kiss came right after a pause for breath, and that one was spectacular.

It was longer, wetter, hotter.

Eddie didn’t want it to end.

But someone banged on the door and they couldn’t be those people.

As they moved away to let the person in, Steve leaned his head against Eddie’s shoulder, like he did on movie night.

“So you’re into me too?” He asked.

Eddie could hear the smirk in his tone, didn’t even need to look down or at their reflection in the mirror to know he was being a little shit.

“No, I just kiss all the boys who come up behind me in bathrooms.”

Steve leaned his head back and nipped at Eddie’s neck, sending a shiver down his spine.

“Behave, big boy. Gotta go pretend we weren’t five seconds from fucking around in a public bathroom,” Eddie said as he guided Steve out of the bathroom.

When they got back into the main room, Steve tensed, started to pull away.

Eddie let him, tried not to let it bother him.

But then he was back, head back on his shoulder, arm around his waist.

“Sorry. Just. Not used to this being something I can do,” he said so only Eddie could hear.

“‘S okay. We’re safe here, though.”

No one commented on it when they got back to the table, though they both could tell everyone wanted to.

Will seemed ready to explode with excitement when someone came and asked him to dance and everyone at the table encouraged him to go.

He wasn’t much of a dancer, but he’d learn.

Nancy and Robin eventually went back to the bar to grab more drinks, and Eddie couldn’t help but watch the way Nancy was looking at one of the women who was standing alone by the jukebox.

“Hey, is it possible that Nancy’s…”

“Oh, yeah. Robin and I have had at least four conversations about how much the Wheelers desperately need to admit to themselves that sexuality is fluid.”

Eddie pulled away to look down at Steve, baffled at how educated he was on everything and kind of hating himself for being surprised.

“You’re somethin’ else, sweetheart.”

Steve kissed his cheek in response.

—-------------------

Nancy came out to them a month later, at the same bar, while staring at the same woman who was standing by the jukebox the month before.

She didn’t really use a label, but didn’t feel like she had to.

Mike took a bit longer, but eventually, Will lost his patience and kissed him.

He came out about ten seconds later.

[hawkinsmethlab]

Dustin is quiet on the ride to his house.

Unusual, but nothing unheard of, especially when he’s thinking hard about something. From what Steve had been able to pick up before he’d dropped off Mike and Lucas, there’s a lot going on in the Dumpsters and Dangers department.

Steve is half-tempted to ask him about it, even though he won’t understand a single word, just to see Dustin get excited about something. Not that he’d ever admit it to the kid’s face, but he’s missed him a bit. Ever since he started up Hellfire it’s been “Eddie this” and “Eddie that.” Give him a break.

But, it’s a bad listening day, and Steve’s really just trying to hear the commercial on the radio over the sharp ringing in his right ear. It’s one that plays a million times a day and he knows it by heart at this point, but that kind of makes it worse. Just means he knows when he’s missing a word or a sound effect.

But it’s fine. He’s handling it. The constant ringing used to make him feel like he was going insane, especially on bad days like this where it’s like a physical presence in his head that leaves him feeling lopsided, like the Upside Down itself is pulling on him. Coming and going in piercing waves that block out any other noise, no matter how loud or how close.

Robin thinks it’s a problem.

“I’m dealing with it,” he’d told her, both of them on her bed with her history textbook in his lap. She had a test on Monday and sure, Steve wasn’t the best student, but he’d helped Nancy study a million times.

“Sure,” Robin said. “Except that you aren’t. You’re avoiding it, and those are two very different things. Do I need to pull out my dictionary and beat you over the head with it?”

“Which one, you have like, seven in here.”

“Maybe we can try them all just to see what sticks.” Then, she’d folded herself over the edge of her bed to rummage around in her bag. “But also, I was just thinking, maybe we could give this a try?”

She handed him a folded up piece of paper, biting her lip. Steve took it, skeptical, and unfolded it to see a poster for the Bloomington community center that read American Sign Language Lessons.

At Steve’s extended silence of like, a second, she continued, “I thought we could do it together. For fun. Really up our trash talk game.”

Steve had just stared at it, dread settling low in his stomach like a sack of rocks. He dropped the poster on the bed. “Thanks, but neither of us are deaf. We don’t need it.”

She’d sighed. “Steve--”

“‘In which battle was Napoleon defeated?’”

“Waterloo, easy, but listen to me. ASL isn’t just for deaf people. Besides, you don’t have to wait until you can’t hear anything at all to start learning. I mean, you could, that’s the whole point of the language, but I don’t think you would handle it very well.”

“Rude.”

“I’m just saying.” She rolled her eyes. “Maybe we could even get some of the kids into it. I bet Dustin would--”

“No, Robin.” It came out a bit more harsh than he’d meant it, a little scared and he hated that. He crossed his arms just in case his hands decided to start shaking. “Just. Can we drop it?”

Robin, being Robin and he loved her for it but Jesus, leaned forward on her elbows. Steve raised his legs a little to hide the textbook. He wouldn’t put it past her to use this as some kind of con to cheat. Not that she needed to, she’s a genius.

“Steve,” she said, “you can’t just not tell them forever. Eventually, one of them is going to figure it out, and I don’t know about you, but I’d rather tell somebody something like that on my own terms.”

“I’m not not telling them,” he insisted. “It just hasn’t come up.”

“In five months? Or no, you said Billy is when it got really bad and that was a year ago. There hasn’t been a single moment in all that time where someone hasn’t noticed something different?”

Sure they had. A few different times. But, he’d always been kind of air headed and spacey, even before his concussions so it was easy enough for them to just brush it off as Steve being Steve. “I thought I was here to help you study.”

Robin looked at him like he was one of her crossword puzzles. “I’m just trying to understand why you told me and no one else. That’s all.”

“That’s...different.”

What did she want him to say? That to tell her had been one of the scariest moments of his life, had made him miss the demodog-infested tunnels, had made him feel like he needed a bat in his hands? That saying it, any of it, out loud had left him feeling like he needed to hurl? That the thought of telling anyone else who wasn’t her, as wild as that was for someone he’d met six and a half months ago, left him on the edge of a fucking panic attack?

Yeah, sure, he’d get right on that.

Robin stared at him a little longer before she leaned back, the fight gone. “Fine.” She reached over and grabbed the poster, folded it back up and put it back in her bag. “Just promise me you’ll give it some thought? Even just a little?”

“Scout’s honor.” He held up his hand.

“You were never a scout. And that’s the wrong hand.”

“I went to summer camp that one time!”

“That’s not the boy scouts, Steve!”

It’s been three days since then, and as much as he would like to forget about the whole thing, he’s been kind of agonizing over it. Over what Robin had said, about them figuring it out on their own. Would that be better? Worse?

Either option leaves a bad taste in his mouth. Makes him want to dig Billy up from his grave just to put him back in it. Him and those fucking Russians.

There’s a slap on his arm. “Steve!” Dustin’s glaring at him. “Jesus, finally. You just passed my house.”

Oh. Whoops. “My bad.” He pulls into a random driveway to turn around. “Don’t have to shout, man, car’s only so big.”

“I said your name like six times.”

Steve sighs and wishes for about the millionth time that his tinny-whatever-Owens-had-called-it had a dial so he could turn it down. Or off, really, that’d be great. “Sorry, I guess I’m a little distracted. Some--work thing that Keith’s on my ass about.”

He pulls up in front of Dustin’s house and debates getting out. On any other day he’d be happy to walk him to the door and talk to Mrs. Henderson, but that usually leads to her inviting (or ordering) him to stay for dinner, and while his stomach is more than on board for whatever she’s whipped up, his head has the louder argument.

“Alright, man,” he says and cuts off the radio. “I’ll see you later.”

Dustin doesn’t move. He’s got his backpack on his lap and a loose grip on the door handle, but that’s it. He almost looks...nervous?

He doesn’t think he’s ever seen Dustin nervous before.

“What’s up?” Steve asks. “Your mom pissed at you or something?”

Dustin scoffs. “Please, I’m an angel.”

“Only in her eyes. Come on, what’s bugging you? Something one of the guys said? A kid at school? Some sort of mathematical nerd thing that’s got you stumped?” He gasps. “It’s not Suzie, is it, I swear to god--”

Dustin looks almost scandalized at that. “No. What? No. Nothing like that. I’m just--” He’s suddenly back to nervous. He starts picking at the zipper on his backpack, takes his hand off the door. “I’m just not sure how to--”

After a few more seconds of stuttering silence, Steve rolls his eyes. “Dustin, just spit it out. Whatever it is, you can talk to me. I mean, I can’t promise how helpful talking to me will be, with all the stuff you guys get up to but hey, I can at least try, right?”

Dustin sighs and turns in his seat to face Steve more fully. He seems to steel himself before saying, “Okay. I just want to say, before we move forward, that I’m not mad.”

Oh. Not exactly what he was expecting. “...Okay? I’m not either.”

“And I still think you’re cool or whatever, and we’ll still be friends no matter what.”

Steve nods, completely lost. “Right.”

“Because society can say whatever the fuck it wants!” Dustin is yelling suddenly. “And they can go on and on about the bible and whatever the hell Reagan is talking about, but you’re my friend, dammit! You’re my friend!”

“Whoa, Dustin!” Steve raises his hands, both to calm him down and maybe to protect himself a little. “What the hell are you talking about?”

Dustin takes a deep breath. “I’m talking about how you’re--” He looks around, as if they weren’t alone in the car, then whispers, “About how you’re gay.”

Steve blinks, slowly. There was no way he heard that right. Right? “You think I’m what?”

“I know,” Dustin says. He puts a hand on Steve’s shoulder in what he assumes is supposed to be comforting. “I know that you’re gay and I just want to tell you that it’s okay. There’s nothing wrong with it.”

Steve leans back and stares at him. Dustin leans with him, keeping his hand on Steve’s shoulder. “I’m not gay.”

“You don’t have to hide from me anymore,” he says. “I love you, you’re my friend, one of my best friends, and nothing is gonna change that.”

“Well, that’s great and I appreciate it, but I’m still not gay.”

“Yes.” Dustin nods solemnly. “You are.”

Steve laughs. A short one, like a gunshot, and pinches the bridge of his nose. When Robin had told him about people drawing their own conclusions, she probably hadn’t imagined something like this. God, he can’t ever tell her about this. “Oh my god. Okay. What, uh, what gave me away?”

“Well, really, you shouldn’t feel too bad. I don’t think anyone else has noticed.”

“Hmm.”

“But you’ve just been kind of out of it lately. Distracted more, like right now, driving me home, or when we watch movies. Don’t think I didn’t see you staring at Harrison Ford. Raiders of the Lost Ark and Star Wars, dude.”

“Now hold on, that’s not--”

“And then, back at Thanksgiving, when my mom was telling you that story about me and Suzie and you just looked so uncomfortable--”

Because Steve hadn’t had a single clue what she was talking about.

“--plus, I’ve seen the way you look at Eddie so--”

“Whoa, whoa, whoa, wait.” Steve scoffs. “How I look at Munson? The Freak.”

“Well, yeah, it’s like you’re being tortured or something.” He shrugs. “It’s kind of romantic, honestly.”

Jesus Christ. “Okay. Wow.” This is worse than every Upside Down encounter combined. “Dustin, I will repeat: I am not gay. There’s an explanation for all of those things, but it doesn’t involve my sexuality in any way. Got it?”

Dustin raises an eyebrow, totally not believing him. Finally, he leans back. Crosses his arms. “Alright then, I’m listening.”

Whenever he did let himself picture how telling one of the kids would go, this hadn’t been what he’d imagined. But really, this has already gone so terribly, so how could it possibly get worse?

(Dustin could look at him like he’s broken, like he doesn’t recognize him, could tell him that he doesn’t trust Steve to watch his back, could start treating him differently or avoiding him, he’s already hanging out with Munson more, why not just abandon him altogether--)

“Alright.” He runs a hand through his hair before settling it on the bottom of the wheel, gripping it so tight his knuckles go sheet white. “So. Yeah, I’ve been distracted and not...listening as well.”

“Because you’ve been thinking about--”

“Nope!” Steve closes his eyes. Deep breaths and quick prayer to not kill a child. “It’s because I literally can’t listen as well as I used to. I--I have hearing loss.”

His second time saying it out loud to another person and it’s met with a similar kind of gut-turning silence. Steve watches Dustin’s face go through several rapid changes before settling on something confused, his mouth slightly open and his eyebrows low.

“Oh.”

Then he looks mad.

“You have what? Dude!” He starts slapping Steve across his arm. “Since when?”

“Since--Jesus, man, stop! Since the mall fire, okay?”

Dustin freezes and Steve does too, the guilt like ice in his chest. He looks at Dustin and knows he’s thinking about the elevator and the bunker and the sizzling of human flesh under a fucked up cattle prod. It had been a tough summer for all of them, but Steve won’t ever be able to forget how Dustin had sat next to him in his car, just like this, trembling when he told Steve about how he was having nightmares. About how he thinks he might have killed that guy, and what did that make him?

A hero, Steve had told him. You saved our lives.

“If I hadn’t--” Dustin starts.

“Cutting you off there, Henderson. This,” Steve waves a hand around his face, “is not your problem. Okay? It has nothing to do with you.”

Dustin looks so small then, so lost, and Steve feels his heart twist. He reaches over and ruffles his hair. “It’ll be okay. I can still hear out of my right ear, so I’ve got that going for me.”

Dustin frowns. “Does anyone else know?”

“Only you and Robin. I just...haven’t found the right time.”

“The right time being when? It’s been months. If we’d known, we could have helped you.”

Just like with Robin, he doesn’t have a good answer. Doesn’t really have any answer, and doesn’t know when he will. “I’ll get around to it. Sometime. But,” he locks eyes with Dustin, “you have to promise me you won’t tell anyone until I’m ready.”

“Steve--”

“Promise me, Dustin.” He stares him down. “I’m dead serious.”

Dustin sighs, but nods. “Alright.”

“On your mom’s life?”

Dustin recoils. “Dude, you’re bringing my mom into this?” Then, “Alright, fine, I swear on my mother’s life. Cross my heart and hope to die and all that shit, I won’t tell a soul.”

“Thanks.” Steve claps him on the shoulder. “Now get out.”

“Does Robin know you’re gay?”

“What?” Robin can never know about this conversation. “Dude, no, I’m not gay!”

“So you are dating Robin.”

“I’m not dating anyone! Definitely not Robin, and I don’t have any kind of crush on Munson or anyone else!”

“But I swear, the way you look at him--”

“I hate his guts, now get out or I’ll hold your hat hostage.”

With a proper amount of grumbling, Dustin manhandles his backpack and steps out. He goes to shut the door, but pauses. “You know, you saved my life too. I’ve got your back no matter what. Okay?”

His eyes sting, so he itches his nose. Clears his throat to make sure it won’t crack when he says, “Yeah, Dustin, I know. You too.”

The next second he’s gone and Steve, alone in his car, is left to think that maybe...ASL lessons might not be so bad.