#the bear posting

[all-or-nothing-baby]

DYSTOPIAN BUTTER

[heavenbarnes]

due to the fact i inhabit an island in the south pacific, the bear doesn’t come out here til tomorrow

[syawntanhi]

Maybe it’s just my personal hate for modern decor but I kinda don’t like how lifeless The Bear restaurant kinda looks now

[woolieshubris]

tumblr simulator

[prettybearbutch]

your teeth are a gift from god and you can sink them into other people's flesh btw

[tonia-aaaaa]

Heathers but it's the Bad Boys... Bad Boys but it's the Heathers...

UPDATE: there's a part 2 now, for anyone who wants to see Scott & Martyn as Veronica & JD!

[trashy-greyjoy]

sometimes, it's not so much about the romance as it is about the devotion. the adoration.

[maxblogs-world]

🔞click 👇👇👇

[zephyrchama]

Going to a restaurant with the cast of Obey Me! and the waiter asks, "is anyone in your party under 500? Beings who are five centuries and under eat for free."

The waiter glances at Luke as they say this but everyone immediately turns to you.

Mammon cracks up when the waiter brings over a high chair and you have to turn them down. Leviathan encourages you to at least take the booster seat so you can feel taller. Thirteen wheezes when they bring out the crayons and coloring mat, which you insist on sharing. You tell Diavolo not to get any funny ideas when the waiter bends down to speak with you at eye level. It's just standard protocol for this diner.

Mephistopheles doesn't understand the big deal. You're not even a century old yet, isn't this normal? Solomon, however, is trying not let his mini midlife crisis show. To Barbatos' delight, he's not getting the same treatment as you (despite also being human) and fears he might be starting to look his age.

Lucifer is visibly enjoying himself way too much and hasn't stopped sneering since you were handed a children's menu, which Beelzebub is excitedly cross-referencing with the adult menu that everyone else got. Raphael likes the little flag they stuck in your food. Luke is acting so smug and haughty that Simeon has to remind him to be humble.

Satan makes the unnecessary offer to cut your food into smaller bites because they only gave you a small plastic spork, while Asmodeus is busy snapping pictures of the chef's ketchup smiley face atop your dish. Belphegor warns you not to hurt yourself and asks if he should blow on your food, causing you to threaten him with the spork.

[loverboyfae]

sugar calling others “my love” was NOT the other food industry experience i was expecting to have in common with this show but my coworker does (very sweetly) refer to all of us as “my love” so either there’s broader cultural context i’m missing or there is some connection

[all-or-nothing-baby]

Carmy: Nothing is beautiful and everything hurts

Richie: Shut the fuck up

Carmy: You shut the fuck up!

Syd: *prays for that stroke*

[heavenbarnes]

someone on tiktok included mikey berzatto in a haunting the narrative slideshow

[spongebobssquarepants]

[elfgrunge]

Going insane reading this wikipedia quote about the real life Cocaine Bear, which is taxidermied and kept in a mall in Kentucky (though it may actually be a different, unrelated, taxidermied bear)

According to the bear's owners, the Cocaine Bear has the authority to officiate legally binding weddings in the mall where it is kept due to Kentucky's marriage laws. This claim is only partly true; the bear does not have the authority to solemnize weddings, but the state of Kentucky cannot invalidate marriages performed by unqualified persons if the parties believe that the person marrying them has the authority to do so. As such, it is a belief in the Cocaine Bear's authority that allows it to officiate legally binding weddings in Kentucky.

You have to BELIEVE in the power of your Cocaine Bear Marriage for it to take effect. Fucking magical.

[prettybearbutch]

sorry for being a lovestruck faggot I promise it will happen again

[haveamagicalday]

I woke up at 6am and wrote an obituary for the two old guys in the muppets