#thats why im starting the search so early

[forest-from-the-trees]

why are gifts so fucking difficult oh my godd. starting to look for anniversary gifts for my partner cause weve got about two months to go, and i swear to god anytime theres a holiday where we have to give gifts i panic.

its so difficult cause in theory i know what she likes but i dont feel like we spend enough time around each other to know what style of things she likes yknow? ill send her stuff occasionally that i like and i feel like she has a really good grasp on the things i enjoy cause i have such a distinct style. for her though like i know for a fact that she doesnt dress in the way she wants to, but if she was given the chance i dont know what she would choose to wear. like what she wears now is different than what she would wear if she had the choice to redo and choose her own wardrobe (her words). so like. i always freak out when buying jewelry and stuff like that cause i dont know if its a thing that she would like or not based on how weird that situation is right now.

[reidmania]

inbetween | spencer reid

good riddance x spencer reid one shot series master list

summary ; after months over talking over email, you and spencer finally meet in person.

warnings ; reader & spencer fall in love over emails, meeting in person, insecure reader, insecure spencer, worries about not being enough, pretty much just pure fluff tbh.

an ; in between yall. this song. this is the first oneshot in the good riddance x spencer reid one shot series!! while i waiting for the poll to finish!!

part one, part two, part three

‘I just can't come between 'em, they got their own thing I wish he'd stop pretendin', he won't let his phone ring. For more than a couple seconds, oh, I think maybe two. two hearts just fallin' in and out of love for somethin' new. ‘i wish that you could see 'em, their faces lighten up their past is cold and empty, they know it's been enough of waitin' on somebody, someone who doesn't care but he knows her name, she knows he'll always be there’

<>

The email rang up at exactly 5:30, exactly when you expected it to. You were sitting at your desk at work, knees pulled to ur chest as you spun on the desk chair. Your coworkers paid no mind to your antics, after working in the safe office for years, with each other. They were used to it by now.

You chewed at your lip as you refreshed your email when the clock changed to exactly 5:30, a wide smile dawned your face when you read the email, you heart ached with longing as your eyes traced over the words on the screen, your stomach tightening and your heart clenching.

Sent from dr.spencerreid@gmail.com at 5:30pm

Hi.

I don’t know when this will send because I’m writing it while on the jet, probably as we get lower and more towards landing, I’ll spare you the scientific details. We only got back from a case this morning, early. Which is why it has taken me so long to reply. Im sorry.

We got a case in Maryland, which I remember you telling me, is where you live. I know I should probably just ask for your phone number but I kind of enjoy the emailing thing. It’s a lot less nerve racking because I can try to pass it off as professional, even though a lot of the time our conversations aren’t.

I actually don’t think we have ever had a professional conversation. Which is a good thing. I really enjoy our conversations no matter what we are talking about. I really enjoy talking to you.

I hope this isn’t too forward but I wanted to know if theres any chance I could see you while I’m in Maryland for this case. I don’t know when it would be or how long I’d be able to see you for, but I do really want to see you. If thats okay with you.

I guess I should give you my number, so you know I’m not some creepy old man. That would be ironic since I work at the FBI and my job is to stop people like that… I don’t know.

Heres my number, 023387677

Love, Spencer.

Your stomach tightened at the idea of seeing him in person. You never admitted it, but you knew he wasn’t an old man, you knew exactly who he was. You made the decision to google his name 6 months ago, when the two of you first started emailing back and forth after he accidentally sent a work email to the wrong person and you replied. It started as just telling him he had sent it to the wrong person, then he thanked you and apologised and made a joke and then the conversation just flowed.

You had been having conversations with Spencer Reid for six months and you felt like you knew more about him than you did yourself. He told you about his day, and about things he had been through, He opened up to you about his addiction and his mom and you opened up to him about your own trauma and issues.

Spencer Reid was your best friend and you had never met him. You had never even heard his voice. You only had seen his face on google when you searched up ‘Spencer reid FBI’ and a photo came up, he looked younger than you assumed in it, seeing the photo was from a few years ago. You felt slightly bad since you knew he could google you and probably come up empty handed — you had the upper hand.

You look at the clock as it inches closer to six o-clock when you finish work. A boring office job, you often complained to Spencer about. It was ironic since his job literally traumatised him, and yet you complained about the boring desk job, although he never ever compared, he would listen and comfort you after a bad day no matter what, just like you did for him.

You don’t reply to the email he sent as you typed the number he sent into your phone, saving the contact under ‘spence’ The nickname that had developed only weeks into the two of you talking. You send him a text, letting him know it was you, saying hi.

“Phone.” You hear your boss, warning you about using your phone at work, you lift your head an apologetic smile on your face as you close your phone, placing it face down on your desk as you close your email and return to your work after muttering out a sheepish, ‘Sorry!’

Spencer is sitting in a conference room of the police station in Maryland. He didn’t know it but he was only two blocks away from the office you worked. He never usually cared to check his phone while working — nothing could be as important as the case.

Until you, until now.

He found himself hanging out to feel the buzz in his pocket, he found himself checking his phone just in case maybe he missed the message. Just in case you did message.

He also checked his email a lot.

“Whats up with boy wonder?” Derek asked as he spun a chair to sit on it backwards, resting his arms on the back of the chair as he looked around at the other team members. Spencer focus on anything other than the case.

“He gave mystery girl his number” Emily said, patting Spencers shoulder softly to get his attention as she walked past him, placing a coffee down in front of him. Spencer noticed how it was his normal order — despite the fact lately he had been getting your order, after he found out what it was. It made him feel a little bit closer to you.

“Oo, Okay lover boy.” Derek hummed approvingly, raising his eyebrow slightly as he looked down at the boy. Spencer sighed as he let back in his chair, tossing his phone on the table as he checked to get no message. “Nothing yet?” Emily asked, knowing Spencer had been stressing since he sent the email on the jet, nearly two hours ago.

He didn’t know it hadn’t even delivered until a few minutes ago.

“Shes probably just busy” Spencer muttered as he checked his watch for the time. 5:33pm, you’d be at work.

Derek shared a look with Emily, both with teasing smiles on their faces. They had watched Spencer obsess over the girl for the past 6 months, even after he tried to hide it for the first few. He did a horrid job, they all noticed him smiling at his computer and typing away more often than ever, they noticed his focus slight adverted. It took a bit but they eventually got it out of him when you didn’t email him back for a week and he was going insane with worry that maybe you were ghosting him, or that you were hurt.

He confided in his team, you emailed him a few days later saying your wifi went down and none of your emails were going through. He was instantly relieved.

His phone buzzed on the table, 5:35pm. His hand instantly reached out for his phone. His eyes widened and his lip twitched upwards as he read the message that lit his screen.

“And lover boy is in” Derek whispered to Emily, loud enough that Spencer could hear that only ended up in Spencer sending him a glare, before typing out a reply and sending it, asking to call you tonight when he got finished.

“Alright, We got a lead” Hotch said entering the room.

You leant against the back of your head board, your hair wet and dripping down the back of your neck as you waited nervously for call to ring through your phone. You were almost terrified of what the conversation might hold. You were glad you were calling before you agreed or disagreed to meeting him, you could feel out whether or not it might be awkward or not.

You almost jumped out of your skin as your phone started ringing, anxiety pooled in your stomach as your skin flushed hot, causing the drops of water on the back of your neck feel as if it was burning the skin. You reached out for your phone that rested on your bed side table, answering the call.

“Hi.” You muttered out a breath of air. You couldn’t even help but smile as the realisation dawned on you. You were talking to Spencer. Finally, actually talking to him.

You heard a harsh breath on the other side of the phone before some shuffling. “Hold on” He mumbled out, you stomach fluttered at his voice as your teeth sunk into your bottom lip as you bit back a smile.

“Okay.” You said, you heard some more shuffling before the sound of a door closing, then a creek. And then a breath.

“Hi” He settled on, you sat up a bit, crossing your legs as his word came out almost breathy and nervous. It made your chest thump against your ribcage so much it ached. “Sorry— I should���ve waited till I was in my hotel room to call, I was excited— Sorry” He said.

You could hear the nerves in his voice and all it did was make your cheeks beat a rosy hue. “It’s okay. I was nervous” You admit softly, you try to hide the slight embarrassment in your voice but it fails you as your words come out small.

You hear him chuckle. You think the sound genuinely makes your mind fall empty of any coherent thoughts. “You don’t have to be nervous” He spoke so softly as if his words were an exhale he had been holding in.

“But I am” You muttered.

“Me too.” He said honestly. You found comfort in the fact he cared enough about this interaction to be nervous about it. You went to run your hand through your hair but paused with you felt the coldness — it was still very wet from your shower.

“Good” You sighed out, voice almost a whisper. You didn’t know why you were speaking so quietly, there was no one else in your house. There was no reason to be as quiet as you were.

“Is good that I’m nervous?” Spencer asked, you could hear the teasing in his voice. It made your head spin and the words get caught as you shook your head, before remembering he couldn’t see you.

“Yes- No- no. No.” You muttered out, “Its uh- Its not good that your nervous— I- Its just good that you care” You scrambled out, stuttering over your words as you grew flustered. It made you want to turn into your pillow and scream.

You heard him laugh, making your face screw up. “Shut up.” You muttered out as it didn’t take a genius to figure out he was laughing at you scrambling over your words, your free hand came up to cover your face as your cheeks felt on fire.

“No- Im sorry. Im sorry. Of course I care, you know I care” He said softly as he collected his laughter, his voice dripping honesty for a moment as he spoke genuinely in a way that made your knees feel weak — Thank god you weren’t standing. You were silent for a moment as a smile dawned on your face.

“Tell me about your day.” He requested gently. You heard some more shuffling you could only assume he was getting comfortable in bed. You pictured it and it made your stomach burn with longing. Wishing it wasn’t just an image in your head.

And you did, you told him about your day and he told you about yours; the conversation flowed simply and sweetly from then on. He teased you whenever you stuttered over your words, you could hear the smile in his voice as he spoke.

You and him spoke until your voice was quiet and drowsy with sleep, until your eyes were fluttering shut and you went unresponsive for a moment before he asked if you were asleep and you would wake up to the sound of his voice, muttering out a no, to which he would chuckle, and tell you to go to sleep.

When you fell asleep, he waited ten minutes to make sure you were really asleep before hanging up. His heart full as he fell asleep smiling.

Sorry I fell asleep. If i didn’t throw you off completely and you still want to see me, im free any day after 6, when i finish work.

Spencer smiled at the message. The acceptance. You were accepting meeting him, seeing him. He couldn’t fathom the idea of anything you doing ever throwing him off. You had wiggled your way into his chest months ago, and you stayed consuming every part of him everyday since. He didn’t see that changing any day soon, or ever.

He sent you an address to a bar Derek suggested the team going to after work. He didn’t know if maybe it was too forward, or might be awkward with his team there, but at least if it didn’t go well there was people around.

He closed his phone as he waited for your reply, his mind replaying the conversation he had with you last night, how sweet you sounded, how your laugh made his heart clench, how whenever you said his name or spoke a little louder he felt light headed, unable to focus on anything but you.

There was anxiety in his stomach when he realised the two of you never quite talked about what it all meant. What the months of conversation back and forth was. He realised he didn’t know what you wanted. What you expected.

Maybe you just saw him as a friend, maybe to you the conversation is nothing more than friendly. Honestly, if that was the case Spencer didn’t think he would be able to deny you of that. He would do anything to keep you in his life, even if it caused a slight ache in his chest. He had told you things he couldn’t imagine telling anyone else, he trusted you in a way he didn’t know possible, and it may be stupid, maybe naive, but Spencer didn’t care.

The way he felt for you took over any ounce of doubt in his mind, it overtook the insecurity welling in his mind, that maybe you wouldn’t like him, not the way he liked you.

He had never felt so much for a person. He had never felt so much point blank. He could hardly fathom you feeling for him near the amount he felt for you.

Your hands traveled over your jeans softly as your palms grew sweaty as you stepped inside the bar. Thanking the guy you held it open for you as he walked out. You were instantly overwhelmed by the amount of people, the music playing and the people chatting. You probably should have gotten changed first instead of coming straight after work but you were too nervous and didn’t want to give yourself time to dwindle in your insecurities then chicken out.

You manoeuvred your way through the people, quiet apologies leaving your lips as you looked around for Spencer, or anyone who looks like they might be an FBI agent.

What does an FBI agent look like? you thought, as you let out a sigh, finally getting out of the crowd of people as you got to the back of the bar, a lot more free of space. A few people around, standing at tables. You skimmed over for a moment as you tried to catch any glimpse of the boy that you could.

You heard your name, making you spin on your heels. You saw a dark haired girl smiling at you. Well that isn’t spencer.

“Yes?” You said, smiling at her as you tried to hide the anxiety building in your veins. Your hand coming to push hair off your face softly as you try to focus on the girl in front of you. She grins widely, “Spencer is over there, you looked like you were looking for someone…” She said, my smile instantly widened as you looked over to where she nudged her head.

your breath got caught in your throat as your eyes settled on him, the photo didn’t do him justice in any way. His hair was messy and slightly grown out, he was engrossed in a conversation with who you could only assume was Derek Morgan, who Spencer had told you about. His tie was crooked in his suit as he lifted his arm to sip the drink in his hand.

you tear my eyes away as you look at the lady who is smiling at you. “Happy with that?” She asks. It takes you a moment to recognise her as Emily, whom Spencer had also told you about. You can hardly put it into words how your chest feels like its gonna explode as your heart thumps.

“He is gorgeous.” You breathe out, shaking your head as words fail you, your eyes trail back to him for a moment to see him laughing, you see his head turn towards the door, as if he is waiting for you to walk through them.

Emily smiles, patting your shoulder softly, “Cmon Mystery girl” She said, you pay little attention to the nickname as she encourages you to walk towards the table with her. Your legs feel like Jelly with every step that you take, your stomach twisting in the familiar feeling of anxiety.

When she pauses at the table your breath hitches. “Oi Reid” She mutters, both he and Derek turns their head towards her, “Look who I found” She says softly, hand brushing over your shoulder.

Spencers eyes skip over to yours and you watch an emotion pull his features. An emotion you can’t quite place and it makes your stomach ache at the uncertainty, insecurity creeping up the back of your neck.

“Hi” You breathe out as you look at him. Theres a moment of silence before he is pushing away from the table and walking around to you. His arms around you the moment you are in reach and it makes your muscles tense slightly before relaxing completely in his hold as you wrap your arms around his neck, hugging him back.

Emily and Derek watch in amusement for a moment, smiling when they see the look on Spencer’s face. The one you couldn’t place the one they knew all too well.

He was in love.

He was in love before seeing you, he knew that but watching you stand there grinning at him made him all the more sure about it. His hand rested on your waist as he pulled back from the hug to look at your face.

“Hi” He whispered back.

You chewed at your lip at you bit back the wide smile that tried to force its way into your features. His hand traveled up to your face before he could stop it hand cupping your face gently.

You eased, leaning into his touch the warmth of his hand feeling gentle against the soft skin of your cheek. “Y-You- I- Hi.” He stuttered this time.

You grinned, “Cat got your tongue?” You ask, teasing him like he would every-time you stuttered over the phone. He just grins in response.

“No. You’re beautiful” He said, eyes dancing over your face, he looked at you like he was trying to memories every little detail. Your stomach tightens and your knees felt weak as the compliment left his mouth. You had been told that before, but it felt different coming from him. He said it with honesty and sincerity.

“So are you” You said back before hugging him tightly again. He didn’t complain at all, instead his arms fell tightly around your waist as he held you against him, as if he was scared that if he let go you would disappear.

The night went on, you stayed by spencer’s side, his hand on yours or around your shoulder gently as if he couldn’t get enough of the feeling of you being next to him. You never complained — you took it all as a compliment and leant into his touch.

“Are you cold?” Spencer asked as you and him walked outside of the bar, hand in hand. he noticed the way you shivered as the cold hair hit the skin of your bare arms. You turn your head to look up at him, the look in his eye enough to make your chest clench around the fat of your heart.

“A little” You admit. It was nothing you couldn’t handle, but spencer was instantly pulling off his suit jacket for you, slugging it gently over your shoulders as the two of you walked down the street. You paused in your steps as you looked up at him.

“Thank you.” You say.

“Its okay- I don’t want you to be cold” He said softly. You couldn’t help but smile at his kindness, but you shook your head. “For that too— But I meant, for asking to see me. Thank you for thinking of me when you heard about where the case was — for talking to me everyday. Thank you for being my best friend Spence” You said softly as you lean against your car as you and him stop in front of it.

His lip twitches upwards into a smile as his hand drops yours instead resting softly on your lips. “I always think of you.” He admits, eyes on yours.

Your breath gets caught in the back of your throat. “Spencer.” You say softly.

He looks at you, really looks at you. He is seeing you. He is seeing every little thing you have told him over the last six months, every little detail about you there was to know, and all he could think about was he wanted more, he wanted to know you more.

“Yeah?” He says, his voice a whisper.

You feel anxiety pool in your stomach as the question lingers on the tip of your tongue. There was a pull towards him you couldn’t ignore, the same pull you felt when you received his email, six months, 2 weeks and 3 days ago. You’d count the hours but you figured that was more his style.

“You can say no, I want you to know that” You said, you wanted to make it perfectly clear that his response to this was completely up to him and you didn’t want to feel pressured. “Can I kiss you?” You ask.

His lips are on yours before you can even finish the question. One hand of his travelling to the small of your back to bring you in closer while the other tangles in your hair, cradling the back of your neck. Your hands instantly cup his face as you press your lips against him. Your lips together saying more than words ever could.

This, right here, him, right now.

It was everything and more.

[wonymao]

──★ ˙ ̟. supernova love 𖹭 !!

a supernova glowin' the dark, forever i wished upon a star. then you came over, occupied my heart, occupied my heart <3

a/n; this is my first time writing a fic! HEAVILY inspired by dream contact: our wish and also supernova love by ive&david guetta because i've been obsessing over that song since it came out (ive never misses)

no cw! fluff cheesy n cringy sakuya, not proofread!! sakuya fic about astronomy kinda??

saku x fem!reader

wc: around 2.3k

a supernova glowin' the dark

forever i wished upon a star ::

astronomy. something about astronomy has always been calling your name. you've always been interested in it, i mean who isnt curious about outerspace? you'd have to be insane not to wonder whats out there, right? or maybe youre just too much of a nerd like your friends say..

everynight you would stargaze on the top of your roof, using it as a stress reliever while listening to your favourite songs and drawing sketches of different planets, stars, galaxies, anything that comes to your mind that day.

2:47am

coming down from your roof, stepping into your room from the window. forgetting to close the window behind you. laying on your bed, lights off, window open with the wind blowing your curtains. with the window open, its hard to fall asleep. the cold air seeping into your room, but being too lazy to get up and close it. slowly closing your eyes adjusting to the cold room, a neon green colour invades your room. instantly opening your eyes and seeing the prettiest green ever suddenly wakes you up.

running to your window, you spot a bright neon green star in the sky. looking through your telescope immediatly, getting a closer look. your heart beats faster, never in your life have you ever seen a pretty star like this one. running back to your bedside table to grab your phone to snap a picture of it, yet once you come back to your window sill, its gone..? the star just.. disappeared

how can you go to sleep after that? while the star is still fresh in your mind, you start to sketch what the star looked like. walking back to your bed sketch book and coloured pencils in your hand, getting comfortable in your sheets. eventually passing out with an unfinished drawing of that star you saw that night.

its been a week since that event happened and you cant stop thinking of it. ever since that day youve been wishing everynight looking up at the stars. 'please show me that star once more' you want to know if what you saw was real, if you were just so tired you started imagining things.

because that morning you woke up, you immediatly ran to turn on your computer searching for neon green star spottings, yet nothing showed up. only fake stock images.

you sit on the bench that you always sit on daily while waiting for the train that takes you back home after your cram school. you were let out early. 15 minutes till the train comes, its cold too. to pass time you pull out your sketchbook. flipping through the sketches of all the green stars youve drawn, you begin to skecth it again. you want to sketch a drawing similar to what you saw.

as your minding your own buisness, you feel a pair of eyes on you over your shoulder. turning around you see this guy, munching on bread staring at your drawing with wide eyes. he looks about your age, but why does he look like he jjst saw a ghost??

"that green star.. you saw that too??" he says with an unexpected deep voice "no way. did you see this as well?!" you stand up excitedly looking at him right in the eyes

"yeah, ive been searching online for any clues on what i saw.. i thought i was the only one" the boy replies sloghtly smiling

you reach out your hand to him "im y/n! im so happy to meet someone who saw it too!"

"im fujinaga sakuya" the boy takes your hand, and sits down on the bench as you follow.

"i tried to take a picture of the star but jist as soon as i picked up my phone it was gone" sakuya says with a hint of sadness in his voice.

"me too! thats why im drawing it because i domt ever want to forget that moment. ever since i saw that ive been wishing too see ot again"

"i hope that wish comes true for the both of us," sakuya says looking at your sketchbook. silence falls with the both of you sitting beside eachother on the bench on the cold. you start flipping through thr pages silently showing him all the skecthes you drew throughout the week. looking at his face for a reacyion he just lets out a little laugh.

the train comes and you both get on. its so warm on the train that you start to feel itchy from how cold it was outside. sakuya sits down and invites you to sit beside him.

the two of you talk about the star you saw that night, but eventually the conversation turns into getting to know eachother. his name is fujinaga sakuya, hes 16. he loves soccer, basketball, and also is interested in astronomy. time moves by so quick you dont even realize you miss you stop. ringing the bell to be let off at the next stop, you get up but he grabs your hand. looking down at the boy whos still seated, you see he's holding out his phone.

"y/n.. uhh.. can i have your phone number?" he shyly asks. you smile to him grabbing his phone and putting your number into it. giving his phine back you wave bye at him while stepping off the train. hes waving back and smiling.

when he mentioned he was interested in astronomy, your heart started beating faster. youve never met someone who liked the same stuff as you, not only that. but hes also really attractive and kind.

you step into your home, taking of you coat and boots, your mom welcoming you back and offering you dinner. after eating you get ready for bed and fall asleep.

----

tge next day you had just got gotten home from school, getting ready for bed you get a notification from your phone. thibking its one of your friends asking help for the homework you sigh, turning on your phone only to see a text from.. fujinaga?!

----

sakuya got to his shared dorm around 8:30pm, taking off his backpack and slipping off his shoes running into the living room like the happiest child ever. "guys you will never guess what happened to me today" sakuya says while 5 boys turn their attention from the tv to him

"i talked to this girl-" sakuya is cut off from his roomates cheering for him. really? he didnt even get to finish his sentence but theyre cheering for him like he just accomplished the hardest thing ever

"our saku-chan finally getting a girlfriend?" riku jokes nudging the youngers arm

sakuya blushes at the thought of the girl being his. "yeab so what? i talked to a girl and you guys didnt. i know youre all jealous."

the room goes dead silent. the first to break the silence is sion laughing follwed by the others. sakuya jist ignores their teasing and goes to his room to get ready for bed.

the next dayduring rheir shared dinner sakuya asks for advixe on how to strike a conversation with the girl. "just ask her to go to that bakery you always go to or sometbinf" yushi suggests

"hyung youre so smart!" sakuya says pulling out his phone and starts texting away. naturally the 5 boys gathering around him watching the conversation between him and the girl

"YOOO SHE SENT A HAND HEART SAKU SHE LIKES YOU" Riku says slapping sakus shoulder "orrr she could just be nice, but i doubt that" ryo adds on

"our little sakuya has a date tomorrow" daeyoung says hugging the younger boy. sakuya smiling to himself as his face flushes thinking of getting to see her again.

sakuya hurriedly goes to his room to try and get some good sleep so he can be refreshed and full of energy for tomorrow.

---

then you came over, occupied my heart,

occupied my heart <3 ::

its been 2 months since youve met sakuya and youve been hanging out with him very often. youd be lying to yourself if you said you didnt like him. everytime he looks at you with those eyes you feel you heart beat faster, cheeks flushing red. whenver he asked why you were red you would jist say its from the cold. but you didnt know that he knew it was because of him, i mean it was already spring. shouldnt you be saying its too hot? sakuya was just waiting for the perfect time to tell you what he truly felt about you.

even thiugh he knew you liked him because youre not so good at hiding your feelings, deep down, he thought maybe you were just being nice like what ryo said when he first asked for advice.

you both saw that green star on febuary 7th. he wantes to confess to you april 7th. that day also happened to be your birthday.

"soo whens your birthday?" sakuya asks while tilting his head at you. you stop eating your food to reply "its april 7th" sakuyas mouth is wide open "REALLY??" sakuya says shocked "yeah why?" you slightly laugh at his cuteness

"oh.. nothing, its just next week" he awkwardly laughs realizing his actions were too weird "are you doing anything that day?" he asks. "yeah im going bowling with my friends!" you reply smiling like an idiot

sakuya reaches his hands across the table and holds yours. "what about after that?" you feel your face heat up

"i wanna see you on your birthday" sakuya boldly says

"w-we'll most likely be done after 7ish.." you say trying not to move, you want to hide away from this situation. as much as you like it, its embarassing

"okay cant wait to celebrate your birthday at 7:30pm jist the two of us" sakuya says while letting go of your hands to finish his bread.

the rest of the dinner with him goes well, you trying to forget what hapoened to calm your heart down.

-----

april 7th.

you wake up in a good mood, i mean its your birthday and you have fun plans for today. you get ready, trying extra hard to look good today. not only for the amount of pictures youre gonna take today, but also for.. sakuya.

as the time gets closer to 7:30 your heart beats faster. god you really cant think of sakuya without blushing and almost looking like a fool in love.

he told you that he wanted to celebrate your birthdah togetger in your house, and you agreed. its currently 7:15. waiting for him, you touch up your makeup and hair, also cleaning uo your room a little.

*ding dong* you hear the doorbell from the front door. you told your mom not to asnwer the door if someone knocked because you told her your friend was coming over. your mom makes raises an eyebrow at you because you normally never say that to her, so she assumes ots a boy. which she was righr when she hears you greet a deep voice boy. respecting your privacy she just stays in the living room.

"hi y/n" sakuya says stepping into your house holding a bag of sweefs from wishs bakery and a present

"hi saku! omg you didnt have tk get me a present" you shyly say

"its your birthday of course i had to" he says taking off his shoes

"thank you.. come on lets go to my room?" sakuya nods at your request. his heart beating knowing hes about to confess his feelings.

----

"so this is my room!" sakuya looks around, he knew he liked the right girl but seeing your room made his feelings grow even more. he can tell your serious about astronomy.

you both settle into your room, ypu sit on you bed patting the spot beside you which he quickly takes. you both share the sweets he bought, laughing, making jokes and talking like yoh always do.

"wanna see your present?" sakuya gets uo and walks towards yohr desk to pick his present up.

you nod as he gives you the box. you start to open it feeling his eyes on you. a smile instanly lighting up your face as you pull out this pretty milky way snow globe, also a cute teddy bear hokding a heart. you hug sakuya thanking him for the gift.

"open the heart insidd the teddy bear" he says pulljng awat from the hug. listening to what he said, you open the heart. the heart read out

'I think I fell for you, so it’s only fair that you pick me up.'

"saku.. what?" you say looking up at him, face red.

"y/n, ever since that first day i saw you drawing a picture of that green star, i couldnt get you off my mind. i thought about- no i still think about you everyday, how you make me laugh, youre so pretty, smart, kind and.. i ended up falling in love with you. i love you y/n. can i be your boyfriend..?" sakuya says struggling to maintain eye contact, face heating up. you break into tears hugging him.

"yes of course, i wanna be your girlfriend sakuya. i love you too" sakuya hides his face in the crook of your neck and smiles to himself.

"youre the best person that has ever walked into my life" he whispers still hugging you. you break the hug to look at his face. you cant believe it. he's yours? the boy youve liked and known for 2 months confessed to you on your birthday.

sakuya cups your face in his hands

"can i kiss you?" you swear you couldve died in that moment. you silently nod not wanting to speak jist incase if you stuttered too much, or jist having your voice crack

he slowly inches his face closer. your lips meeting, his hand still on your face but his other dropping to lay on your lower back. you wrao you arms around his neck. the kiss only lasfed a couple of seconds but after he pulled away from the kiss you hide your face in his chest. you love him so much.

"this is the best birthday ever, thank you saku."

its crazy to think that you found your boyfriend all because of a green star.

[basil-does-arttt]

hold on wait a second i had a thought

in the DLC prolouge cutscene for DMC 5, when Vergil is in that stone passageway area, he says "its nearly time" (in reference to him splitting himself in half).

We know what day it happens, april 30th. The date is shown in Nero's flashback scene. This is of course assuming Vergil did all that on the same day, which i think is what happened. (He could open a portal to his house to travel, and why would he wait any longer and risk dying first?)

Anyway. Thats not my point, my point is: did he choose to do it on this day on purpose? Is this date special?

Im overanalyzing here so this may be a stretch, but: Could that be the day Eva died? Think about it. Him splitting himself was a "rebirth" of sorts: discarding his humanity to become a full demon in search of ultimate power.

Vergil being stabbed by those demons the day Eva died could also be counted as a kind of rebirthing for him: In the span of a few hours, he lost everything. His family, his life. And maybe even, his full humanity, as he gained his DT form in that moment too (shown by him having the same triggered-style eyes Dante uses when threatening V toward the start, also (half)triggered.) No longer was he a mere human boy, but now half a devil - the things that killed his family - too.

Knowing Vergil, it could make sense. In DMC 3 he's quite proper and a bit sentimental, much more so than Dante and i can see him caring more for these kinds of niche details in his life a lot more than Dante too. I also think he may have still been in that mindset when coming out of the Nelo Angelo body (however that happened), in a way that he hasnt really grown or matured while he was Nelo Angelo due to all the mind-fuckery performed thanks to Mundus.

(Could also be clarification for the reason Vergil still looks so young, quote "because of how much time he's spent in the underworld compared to Dante". He didnt live there, certainly not by choice. But he was captured and tortured by Mundus for 10 years. My thoughts is that he's technically still in his teenage body, as becoming Nelo Angelo and being in the underworld for so long thanks to Mundus halted (or at least very significantly slowed) the aging process. Time could move slower in hell but thats a rant for another time, ive gone off track.)

As such, him choosing such a special (traumatic) date to essential commit suicide on doesnt seem like much of a reach to me. Vergil has always been methodic. He doesn't do things hap-hazardly and never has, even as Nelo Angelo when he invites Dante outside to set up a proper fight rather than just taking the opportunity and attacking in the bedroom.

Of course you can argue it was coincidence, and he just stumbled across Nero by chance and decided to do it right then and there. He had to have found Nero first of all, figured out his plan of attack (probably so he wouldnt draw unwanted attention and possibly be stopped), then actually put it into motion. He couldnt exactly control the date Nero happened to be in the right place at the right time and gave him an opening. Im not trying to convince or anything, just sharing ideas, But wouldn't it just be so in character for april 30th to be a special date for him??

Overall i at least think the reason he chose to do it at the house was intentional for reasons stated above. If it wasnt, then why didn't he just... idk, find an alleyway or something and split himself there?

Those are my thoughts. Id love to hear other people's theories and such on this too.

(EDIT: I REALIZED THE MOMENT HE SPLITS HIMSELF ALSO PROBABLY HAPPENS AT A SPECIFIC TIME AS WELL, NAMELY 6:00 PM.

It mustve taken him some time to get back to the house. Not hours, but not seconds. 15 minutes seems like a good amount of travel time for someone who can teleport using portals alongside a bit of walking. If he got there early he could've just waited too.

A specific date, april 30th, and at (likely) exactly 6:00pm. In VOV while it is black and white, i assume the attack happened late into the evening, since the sky is dark when he gets back to the house a bit later. Idk how he would've known that it was exactly 6:00 but... anyway, Mundus also seems like the type of guy to plan shit, especially an attack like he did to Eva and the twins, if that whole "eva died on april 30th" thing was true.)

[cat-autism-wizard]

five times danny's english class learned that he was phantom (and one time he had to reveal it)

4- valerie gray

valerie was a smart girl but her rage and grudge often clouded her judgment. she knew phantom was doing so much help to humans but she still held a grudge since hes the one who ruined her dad's career and her life. after learning he was after the mayor she decided she was gonna do anything to capture phantom.

but everything changed when she saw him risking everything he had to save the little half ghost girl. he even risked his own life. valerie hated ghosts but she was not a monster. she could never hurt a human even if theyre half human. so she helped him save the little girl. maybe phantom wasnt too bad.

after they rescued the little girl and the mayor from that evil ghost plasmius both phantom and ghost girl went away. valerie was on her way before realizing she didnt check on the mayor and she went back to the lab.

she saw the mayor he was smiling like a crazy man. then she saw glowing rings on his waist. then he transformed..

no.

no no no no.

there was no way that was possible. mayor masters tranformed into plasmius. was she helping him the whole time? the stories about phantom being evil and attacking the mayor, they were all lies. valerie felt betrayed, she felt stupid. the whole time she was being tricked into thinking phantom was the enemy while the real enemy was manipulating her.

maybe she was wrong. wrong about not hurting a human. all she felt was rage. she took a deep breath. she saw what plasmius could do if she attack him now there was no way she could win. she tried her best not to be impulsive as she left the lab.

that day she learnt so much. there were half ghosts some were evil and some were just trying to survive. she was so wrong about a lot of things. she always thought ghosts were all evil but now she sees theyre just like people and phantom was one of the good ones.

"shit" she said as she let herself fall to her bed. the she started to think if whether phantom was also a half ghost. he did look like he knew the little girl in her both forms.

next day in school everything was the same. between classes star walked with her.

"girl are you okay? you seem really tired." star asked worried. she was right valerie was looking like he hasnt slept like ages. it was partially right she couldnt get much sleep from overthinking.

"yeah i am, just have something on my mind. dont worry." she smiled reassuring star that she was telling the truth. but it wasnt really convincing for star.

"i dont want to push you but i hope you know that im here for you val." star gave a small smile.

when the bell rang they went to their classes. valerie was happy to have a friend like star. she might be the only reason why she was still sane. she wished that she could talk about ghost stuffs with her.

in the class valerie noticed danny looking tired more than usual. after class valerie wanted to ask danny if he was alright but right as she was approaching him a ghost attacked the school. valerie saw danny ran for the janitor closet. 'thats by far one of the worst place you could hide' valerie thought. she had to save him before something happened but first she had to become red huntress. before she could do anything she saw phantom flying towards the ghost attacker.

'huh' she thought. phantom was pretty early which gave her some time to get danny out of that terrible 'hiding space'. she opened the janitor closet only to find nothing. danny wasnt there.

valerie started to panic. where could he be? what if something happened to him? valerie was finally gaining friends that was really her friends and not some jock who drops her the moment shes not rich. she was not gonna lose her friends because of some lousy ghost. she found a place to transform into red huntress and searched the whole building but there was no trace of him.

it was only when the attack was done and phantom souped the ghost she could see danny again. she took her suit off somewhere safe and rushed to danny.

"danny where were you?" she asked worry apperant in her voice. danny was taken aback a little.

"i was hiding from the ghost." he said. that was a lie, she knew it but danny said it way too calmly.

"in the janitor closet?" valerie asked not believing the boy.

"yeah it was the closest place i could hide." he said absentmindedly. if valerie didnt check the janitor closet herself she might have believed him which irritated her more than anything. she sighed in an attempt to calm herself down or at least to seem calm.

"im glad youre safe." she left them without they get to say anything more. she had to think to make things make sense.

danny lied to her. which was annoying but all valerie could think was how natural he sounded. danny couldnt lie to save his life, she would know. when he doesnt have his homework he couldnt make up a single lie nor can he tell them without looking like hes gonna shit himself. no, danny fenton was a lot of things but being a good liar was not one of them. it only indicates that he told that lie before so many time. it was a practiced lie.

but why? why would he lie about a hiding place? what was he hiding from valerie? where did he go when he was not in the closet? and more importantly how did he go elsewhere?

valerie was sure she did not look at somewhere long enough and far enough for her to not to notice danny leaving the closet. if there wasnt a secret passage in the closet or danny didnt suddenly gain ghost powers it would be impossible for danny to go out without valerie seeing him.

wait.

no no it was stupid, there was no way.

there was no way that danny out of all people was a half ghost. everyone knew he always hid away the first when there was a ghost attack because he was scared and danny only knew ghost stuff because his parents were ghost hunters. no other reasons. it was just a coincidence that he looked like that half ghost girl. or that he was always close to the places that attacks happen. or that he only comes out when the attack is fully done. or that phantom uses a thermos that looks exactly like his thermos thats written 'fenton' on it.

oh ancients.

oh ancients.

danny was phantom. how could valerie be so blind. of course he was. it was as obvious as the sun in the sky. she couldnt believe she couldnt see it before. to be fair she didnt know half ghost existed. but still it was obvious.

she cursed herself in her mind she also cursed danny because danny phantom? really? he couldnt find a better name? at least to his credit it took valerie so much to figure it out but it was still a dead give away. but she also cursed danny because why didnt he tell her? she couldve hurt him real bad.

valerie sighed and tried to think how can she help him. and how to compensate all the times she hurt him.

1 2 3 4 5 +1

[junee-e]

NEW JUNO EPISODE!!!

(im reasonably early this time lets go)

ramblings and random thoughts follow :D

who’s this chip guy i love him he’s so silly

ive decided i dont like the pet guy hes insulted my new favourite character chip hoffman

‘no he said he didnt like me…and when you think about it thats sort of a challenge’ REAL i love this guy

‘i knew i’d need some help to turn the mood in my favour so i poisoned everyone :D’ cHIP OH MY GOD

bro really posioned everyone and was like ‘you know what everyone else has passed out this would be a great time for some family bonding’ and honestly gotta respect him for that

hey what if lydia…..doesnt seem poisoned…..chip…..does…..but also chip is….a silly guy…..and now i’m…..confused

im suspicious of the bird guy he seems mean :[

WAIT NO IS CHIP A BAD PERSON NO MY BOY WAIT NO

ive got attached to a criminal in 15minutes kevin why and how?

i say that as if 3/4 of the people in this podcast arent also criminals and arent also my favourite

juno being in wonder of of chips plan to just pretend to pass out for literal hours to avoid talking about something…..juno…..juno no…..

OOOOO THE DARK MATTERS STREAM FIRST MENTION (i think maybe im wrong) OOOOOO

HE THOUGHT THEY SPLIT UP BECAUSE OF THE BIRD AHAHAHAHA

ok ok lydia she seems kinda mean but also like…..reasonably straighforward? i dont know if i like her?

OH I DO NOT LIKE THE BIRD GUY FUCK HIM HE IS TERRIBLE

you know what i still love chip stealing from the bird guy is justified

yeahhhh she never had the poison fish!!! im right all the time ever about everything

*rita, very excited*: ‘oh boy whodunnit mista steel??’ rita is so me i love her

‘monty has a habit of repeating things?’ ‘repeating things??’ ‘repeating things.’ LMAO i love this show

WHAT THE FUCK HOW IS THE DEATH OF A BIRD SO SAD IM CRYING WHAT THE FUCK

‘whoever your searching for, they arent going to fill the hole you think they will. nobody ever does.’ NO SHUT UP. JUNO DONT STOP LOOKING FOR NUREYEV PLEASE

‘we are not puzzle pieces destined to click together’. BUT THEY ARE NO

‘do you recognise that?’ ‘i do. but i need to find him Dr Hoffman. He’s in trouble’. HELL YES JUNO ASJKDFKSJGE

fuck yeah we really got the best ending: dont help the piece of shit bird man, help the nice lady, still get what we need

the fact that the moment juno says ‘we’ i know hes talking about nureyev…..*insert sounds of me screming into a pillow*

‘what nureyev was offering was the kind of clean cut lydia was talking about. the chance to start fresh somewhere else….with someone else.’ BUT YA DIDNT

AND HES STILL LOOKING FOR NUREYEV LETS GOOO :D

THE ?DOKANA? (i dont know how to say it) GROUP A NEW LEAD YAYYYY

THEY’RE GETTING CLOSE?????

DOES RITA NOT KNOW ABOUT SLIP????

‘and of course lydia hoffman. she seemed like the happiest of the sad and she’d done it by cutting ties with her past cleanly’ ISTG IF THIS SEASON ENDS WITH JUPETER LEAVING EACHOTHER I WILL NOT SURVIVE

annndd thats the end. we got new answers new leads new angst. i am not ok.

[twixitativi]

do you have any tips on writing an au? normal fics i can usually handle but i’m working on a kunichuu grease au and i’m finding it quite difficult.

hiya! thanks for asking :3 also good luck with that, that seems like so much fun omg; feel free to send when you start releasing, i'd love to check it out!

ill be using splinters as my example here purely because thats closer to what you're trying to do (movie/musical as reference)

this is going to be long as fuck because i tend to ramble and go into detail, so im adding a read-more. i sincerely hope this helps because i know its a LOT (potential spoilers for splinters included)

1. The Foundation

when i first started working on splinters, it started with a lot of idea bouncing. who would suit what role? why would that role work for them? originally, i had looked at dazai as jd and chuuya as veronica, or dazai as veronica with fyodor as his jd.

then, i also started thinking about story 'beats'. to be clear about what that means, i like to think of different parts/scenes that i need/want to hit, and kind of the order if possible. this usually intertwines with the original story-- in your case, grease.

all this starts falling into the next step:

2. Research

it may not be entirely apparent, but i did (and still do) a FUCK TON of research for splinters. by choosing to have multiple source materials to base your work off (both bsd AND grease), depending on how close/accurate you want to be, you're going to want to get in touch with the material.

you've mentioned grease-- i'm assuming you're doing this based off the movie (love the movie. need to rewatch). what i personally do with heathers the movie is that i watched it the entire way through first to refresh myself with the material. it might help you to take notes about different characters, ideas, plot lines. i found a copy of both scripts online in case i wanted to see about throwing an iconic line in during an important scene without diving through the whole movie to find it.

i dont know HOW historically accurate you want to go with your fic--you may be choosing to explore the concept of grease rather than the actual setting itself-- but grease takes place in the late 50s, TECHNICALLY early 60s (movie itself came out in the late 70s) (my mom LOVED it when it came out). so, you may want to do some basic research: fashions/trends of the time (this has gotten harder to search online, you may want to even run to the library and find some books if possible)? societal norms? what did normal teens do during that time? did they have arcades, did they go to restaurants, what was the average place they hung out at?

a lot of times, i have to double-check if some of the stuff in splinters is period accurate. each decade has different lingo, slang, and general information that was normal during it. hell, looking back at the 2010s versus 2020s, if you were to write a story during, saying, 2011, and have your characters saying "slay" and "yas queen" and "road work ahead, uh yeah i sure hope it does", i regret to inform you that that will NOT be accurate, as those phrases are more late 2010s + that vine came out in 2016. now, could you quote/potentially reference these things? absolutely! but you have to be more strategic about it.

ALSO. look up fun trivia about your source material! you know where i got my title from? its the english translation of the italian name for heathers. im not even kidding. also, mix and match material! hell, even throw references in to other material! i had my mean girls reference in there! because its bsd, i like to throw in authors i like from time to time where they fit!

another silly one: what music came out around that time, playing on the radio? HOW did they listen to music? i specifically listen to a 1989 top hits playlist when im trying to figure out what songs might be playing on the radio while my characters are driving-- and even THEN i still will look up specifically when that song came out, because i made the choice to be horribly specific with my timeline.

on that note:

3. If you can, DON'T SET A SPECIFIC MONTH/DAY/ETC.

i made my choices. do i regret them? YES. is it still fun to work with? absolutely, but also the heathers timeline is lowkey a mess and you could simultaneously claim it takes place in 2 months or several.

honestly, avoid specifics. having to keep track of a timeline is an absolute bitch, and it's going to make your life a lot harder, because then, you HAVE to make sure it all matches up. if i say that kunikida went and got his glasses in march, i cant say that his glasses are brand new in may (this is a hypothetical example).

timelines suck. unless you think you can dedicate the time and energy to keeping with one, don't do it.

4. OUTLINES.

i've been writing fanfics for years, which is wild to me. i was writing fanfics in single digits (didn't even know what fanfics were). one thing that i have especially found useful with splinters is to make outlines for where you want the story to go.

let me break it down for you:

you're gonna have MULTIPLE outlines, and they are NOT set in stone. they are guidelines for you to use so that you're not sitting there going "shit i don't know what to do next". they may be scenes you want to have in the fic. they may be important plot points. they may be absolutely stupid shit that youre like "if i dont get this in here i will cry" (diarrheazai is a threat that i intend to keep)

FIRSTLY. try making a general outline for your whole fic. you don't need super specifics, but think of what events occur during grease. in it, danny and sandy meet in the summer before their senior year. sandy meets and joins the pink ladies. there's a dance competition. danny and sandy fly off in a car into the sunset. etc. TO BE CLEAR, you don't have to keep all the details! it is your story, and what you want to do with it! having that structure can be helpful when you start though.

THEN. once you have that general outline? start trying to plan out chapters. you dont have to make outlines for them all at once. more often than not, i'll sit there before i start a new chapter just trying to outline what'll happen in it. this helps a LOT on multiple levels. i'll provide an example of what that can look like below (SPOILERS IF YOU'RE NOT UP-TO-DATE WITH SPLINTERS):

(the blacked out bit is spoilers, everything else should be clear to see)

a quick explanation: i dedicate a small document to outlines for each chapter. as you can see, with chapter beats, i have diff things i want to try to hit. the stuff highlighted in green is stuff that i come back post-chapter to confirm i hit. sometimes, if it's not EXACTLY in there, i'll leave a note in bold (ex: WAS MENTIONED).

but you can kind of see what im talking about here. i have some things that im trying to knock out per chapter.

other things in my doc to outline:

yes i talk to myself in my notes.

i highlight different scenes according to their relevance to certain characters sometimes; i add scenes in where i need to, and then ofc as you see ill go into detail about specific scenes. and AGAIN these are not set in stone. for example:

as you can see, shit changes over time. that boiler room make-out scene during the homecoming pep rally appeared in ch 11. i did not make this sequence fyodor's pov.

sometimes? i just dont have the time or energy to write shit/dont think its relevant to the plot. good bye, corn maze. you'll be remembered in my thoughts and my outline

also try to have fun while outlining. it doesnt need to be something serious. literally my outlines are a mix of dialogue, scenes, my own thoughts, etc. get silly with it. this is supposed to be fun and enjoyable!

ANOTHER THING:

5. LOOP SOMEONE INTO OBSESSING OVER THIS WITH YOU.

i was inspired by ardeidae to write splinters, and i have successfully trapped them in splinters world for almost an entire year now. by both of us loving it, we can keep ourselves focused on it.

what also helps is bouncing ideas off other people. me and lu have had conversation after conversation after conversation about different plot lines, scenes, etc. sometimes, i don't know what to do and i will ask lu (or other people) for advice about the progression.

you may have also heard of the engineering rubber duck method. if you're unfamiliar, engineers will sit there with a rubber ducky by them and talk to it about what they're working on until they figure out what they need to do. sometimes, just ranting about the fic is enough to help you spawn ideas about what to do next.

OH also

6. If you do end up making a timeline? Have a calendar on hand.

this is no longer 100% accurate to the progression of splinters and the chapters, but it helped a LOT. laying it out like this can make one hell of a difference. im a visual person, so doing this helped. also, can help you keep track of holidays and shit. if you want to give your characters a day off from classes, check a school calendar for holidays. be like "uhhhherrrr yeah they're taking, uhhhh veteran's day off" yk

7. Write, but don't force it.

splinters doesn't have an actual updating schedule because i work on it at my own pace, and update once i finish a chapter. now, i usually finish chapters after a month, but i don't say it updates on x day. don't box yourself in unless you truly think you can handle it. some people are very good about schedules. i am horrible at them, bc ykw? LIFE HAPPENS.

when im in the mood, i write. i will sit for HOURS and just write. grab some snacks, maybe pop on some music, get a buddy to sit with you, but just go for it. sometimes, i'll pull a 25-10 method-- 25 minutes of writing with ten minutes of relaxing and bullshitting--and that helps me not burn out as quickly. but honestly, you cant always brute force it.

have i had to brute force it sometimes? yes. you will get stuck. it naturally happens. sometimes, a scene fucking sucks and you're like "i hate this scene but it HAS to be in there" (if it doesnt fuck that shit. throw it out. blegh) sometimes, you need to mix things up to make it more appealing to you, because i am of the belief that the readers can tell when you're not invested in a scene. if im writing a scene and its going slowly and i just want to get it done? the quality's going to go down, and i KNOW it. so, i evaluate. what do i need to do for this scene to work? can i add something to help? do i need to just rewrite the bastard and call it a day?

and sometimes? you can just go ahead and put a little "<'scene'>" in and move on. depending on how much your fic relies on that scene, that won't always work, but sometimes, you just gotta leave it and come back to it. you can also do that with certain dialogue/details. if you're trying to get your characters from point A to point B, don't shove them there if they run out of gas. make a detour, and see what happens.

eerrrrrrr yeah, i THINK that's the majority of the advice i can give? sorry that that's a lot, but uhhh hope it helps! :')

[predoom]

ohoneohone

Saturday, September 24th, 2005 2:14 pm but i am too weak to be your cure night started out strong. got kinda wack. want to go on a date to the corpse bride? (157 Comments |Comment on this) Tuesday, September 20th, 2005 12:56 pm ruckus juice dear demar,

i am sorry.

sugar in chicago. Monday, September 19th, 2005 12:19 pm mike murphy all up in demar hamiltons ass went to the alk3/my chemical bromance with demar and nick on the dick. pretty hilarious. the bands let the good times roll. went by pizza metro and made awesome jokes. and ate like 60 bucks worth of super flat pizza. startling revelations about demars life. i like hanging with old friends. down the street from the girl to trevia. kinda chill. matt skiba talked to me about clandestine. pretty amazing. we are wearing all black coming up hats. greg let me dj for a minute and i played some faint and refused. P-Unit. people at my house when i went home. freaked me out. sleeeepover prince. search the net and you can find some amazing pictures. Saturday, September 17th, 2005 4:52 pm reNICKulous woah. got my g.i. joe aircraft carrier in the mail yesterday. its seven feet long. thats like me and patrick stacked on top of eachother. ate a box of life cereal yesterday. kinda gross. somehow with all the chaos of everything i got normal again. its weird to me that 50cents mom is a lesbian. i dunno why. it totally fits and totally doesn't. just like everything else. i saw the motorola commercial we were asked to be in with madonna. yeah thats right- "sell out boy" turned one down cause it wasn't the right situation. haha. we would have had to cancel shows and all- just wasn't right. i just wanted to meet the material girl. we don't do everything were asked to. waited out going over to watch demar pass out and get kissed. instead went to the city. carnival life. we bought ice cream shoes online from hongkong. get jealous. counted freckles. yawn. patrick came over today. we worked on some secret stuff. him and his gee eff are way too lame and cute. i cant wait to see corpse bride. awesomeness. just waiting for tonight to happen.

oops comments wahahaha. Thursday, September 15th, 2005 11:27 pm this week he's mopping floors, next week he's on fries early bird gets the worm. took a headache for my tylenol. went to the cover shoot for spin magazine. it was ridiculous as always. i put myself into the worst clothes i could find cause thats just funny to me on the inside. nickplan and drunkmar showed up cause they keep it the realest. got weird emails all day. pretty standard. someday we'll be nostalgic for right now. but until then you can put it in a pinebox. its funny the mistakes you realize you are making as you go about things. cause those are the worst. it only makes sense when you are that close. otherwise its blurry and filled with lies. and you can say whatever you want but in the dark i know what you look like and think- and no one else does. nothing that needs to be spoken of. im the kind of kid that will go to the goddamned end. file me under: fucking speechless. right to her house. wow, it's been a month. we don't talk. it goes without saying. freckles. kinda dreamy. and i ain't too hard on the eyes. only those arms make it okay. i just don't care anymore. this is the three year boy. this is the lover boy. this is the keeper. the is the one that got away. i drop records, not names. so i'm not letting you in. buzznet updated. please leave my friends or whatever alone, because i have- and im sick of hearing about it. raise your hand if you're excited for fall tour. time to become the person i was supposed to be.

Current Music: you make me wanna lala 12:59 am "growing uuuuuuuuup, i guess i am my own better half" what were they thinking? i'm tired. ate for the first time in what feels like forever today. you know gotta keep that charm. what does that even mean? actually have to get up at 9am for a photo shoot tommorrow. the wackest. i guess it could be worse. i could have to sell stuff or work in a factory instead of just getting laughed at by some dumb photographer cause we don't know how to pose right. flashflashflash. goddamn the new panic at the disco record makes me feel okay in any situation. only two people in the entire world know how it goes. its kind of funny that i get to be one of them. but its strange the way only one person makes you feel electric. like you were meant to be three inches away from them always. but then its gone. or they are. went to green street hooligans. ate your popcorn and drank your soda. cause im kinda a baby. movie dates are funny cause you either watch the movie or you talk the whole time. both are kind of a let down. fall is definitely hug season. bring it on. who knows how it turns out. don't believe the hype. i didn't overdose. this really is me typing.

Tuesday, September 13th, 2005 10:39 pm difficult takes a day, impossible takes a week. oh no oh no. i don't get it but then i don't think i am supposed to. today woke up and bought my friend shoes cause she's rad and i like buying stuff for my friends. i am sick, but it's gonna be okay. i love going to bars with my friends and ordering 5 dollar sprites. yeah i'm that guy. right now i wish this was a lyric i wrote: "i dunno why other rappers try and dis you. cause even my superficial raps are super official". i'm supposed to be waiting by the phone but i'm always at front desk in the hotel lobby. i told my friend that i want to get super big bling jesus necklace- they said it doesn't make sense because im not super into jesus- but i told them that was the whole point. i sing the blues just for the covers of magazines. oh yeah. the rest of my day. ive been going out into the real world alot lately. the sun hurts my eyes but you're making me grin. went to joes house in boy's town- its like one inch big and filled with 80 million things. ebay says that my g.i. joe aircraft carrier is in the mail. but who knows cause i tell people shit is in the mail all the time. its like waking up from a dream and not being sure. for sure. our new video is pretty sweet. hung with the bestest. it feels nice outside. time to go play. i think i am going to be vegetarian again, then probably vegan. cause it just feels right. like you. all i do is watch thundercats and crush hard. what a life.

Current Music: christina milian 2:22 am go right on reds, get left at altars i want to write a "hey momma" song for the emo world. it smells like coffee and rain everywhere today for me.

i have lost all respect for you. before you make accusations, check the scoreboard sweetheart.

just when you are about to give up sometimes a light comes on. like its the only one out there. and when you are unhappy they are a shoulder. and they make you laugh when you get thrown out the window like trash from a car. old friends bend. you got me smiling like it was a dream. and i am slowly letting everything else go.

let go let go.

ive got a crush.

[mihai-florescu]

I was reflecting on my early 2010s internet days and man... i sometimes worry that my obsessions now are performative, i Am doing fanarts in hopes of likes, i Am making posts in hopes of conversations etc, i worry that i only do things for engagement. But then i look back at my adventure time days. I would spend hours drawing fanarts, making fancomics, writing down my favorite song lyrics, browsing wikis, hand drawings character refs and then putting it all together in a big binder that i considered my bible. I had no social media, no friends who cared (those who did were casual watchers on tv because we were 9. I learned english to watch episodes in advance online). All i had was the power of undiagnosed autism. And i must admit an embarassing secret, dear readers. I didnt like bubbline (i only knew that was a ship through youtube comments and amvs) because 1. I was 9 and didnt know 2 girls could date, and 2. I wanted marceline for myself. Looking back it's really funny, the track record was that all my crushes in elenentary school were fictional girls but i just assumed thats normal. I remember when the first fionna and cake episode came out and people were going crazy for matshal lee, i thought he was fine, fun, but i was also mentally rolling my eyes because he's not as cool as marceline. I dont even know why i was a hater there i think i just was too much of a marceline fan to accept what i perceived as people hyping up this guy more than her? Once again i was in elementary school. I had no connection to other Actual people in a fandom setting. And thats how things should be at that age... once i hit middle school my pokemon hyperfixation came back and i also discovered what reddit was... i wasnt posting myself as far as i remember but still. I think it wasnt until my superwholock phase, youtubers phase, and early anime phase in middle school when i started posting online. Wait i just remembered another core memory of the late elementary school days. All the rule 34 that was just free floating on google images when you searched for a character. I was also a mlp girl, so, you know. I like to think im truly and properly desensitized to any and every thing the internet can offer.

[winderlylandchime]

*points to tv* ‘look its Justin and Brian. Dude, it’s early morning and he’s going to the baths? LOOK AT THEM KISSING GOODBYE! Did you see that cute shit! Adorable. Oh Brian..you can find hotter places to fuck at than this dump..JEN! THATS MY BABY JEN! WHAT IS GOING ON? this is his office? FINALLY I AM GETTING MY BUDDY EPISODE! Aw he took a picture of Jen, why the fuck didn’t it show it? I wanna see my girl! My two favorite people being best friends! I am so happy!’ ‘Ted IS A SINGER! Oh as a waiter? *smacks his chest with his fist* respect! Been there, done that, tough shit. *pauses tv and looks at me* Did you know when i first started as a waiter, i didnt know what cappuccino is made of so when people ordered it, i told them we ran out of it. I got fired 4 days later’ ‘i feel bad for Emmett. I get they want to support him but Emy also needs support. Damn it this is bad. But i also *takes a deep breath* feel bad for Mike.’ ‘AWWW Vic and Rodney are gonna live together! Finally Vic gets something more in his life than just hiv and sister. GOOD FOR YOU VICKY BOY! LIVE THAT LONG HAPPY LIFE BABY!’ ‘How in the holy hell, did they convince Brian to go to this restaurant. Id get if Justin was there but he isnt, so HOW? Oh he came along to laugh. Okay, makes sense’ the scene where Pink Posse walks down the street is up and he paused the tv and started laughing. I did not expect him to have these reactions. ‘They look like a gay boyband. Backstreet Gays. Look at them on their way to fight people with their pink shirts. I am trying so hard to be chill with this but what is this? They look like a low budget cult. (The car/fight scene happens) Justin.. violence for violence is not cute. Nothing about this is cute. I am trying to get it cause of prom but WHY IS THIS HAPPENING NOW?’ ‘Look at Brian once again waiting for him. Is he late? A vigilante with a curfew. Thats new. Soooo he’s now hopped up on adrenaline ready to fuck. Cool cool cool. Look how fast Brian’s plans can change when it involves Justin. Or sex. But Brian when youre done, we need to talk to Buzz lightyear about his dangerous activities’ ‘WHY IS MIKE BEING A BITCH TO BLAKE?! He is a sweet guy who hasn’t done shit wrong. Be nice to him!’ ‘Im glad theyre finally giving Vic some fucking story line. Sometimes it felt like they forgot he was there *turns to me all serious* which one am I, Deb or Vic?’ The Britin scene comes up ‘YOURE TELLING ME FOR ONCE THEYRE NOT SHOWERING TOGETHER? see! Brian is worried, scared and annoyed at this pink pussy movement. And so am I! Now come on Brian, go and yell at Cody, like only you can. Why is Justin being so angry at Brian? Since when is he so angry? Brian! Do something!‘ ‘oh Brian is not having Emmetts shit. Look at him being a friend. *pauses tv* i really like this Brian. Something feels different, i fuck with it. he is full of advices lately!’ And we are back to Justin and Cody and he just groaned loudly and slid on the floor from the coach ‘this zack and cody spin off needs to end. Blondie is being forced to be angry and have a horrible haircut. Unless if they give me Brian yelling at this wannabe Captain America, make it stop. Justin he is literally telling you he wants to search for fights, why is my blondie so dumb at times?- damn I actually really feel bad for Mike in this episode, that is a first.’ The scene with Cody and Justin at the restaurant or whatever is up ‘what the fuck is this bullshit? JUSTIN WE HAVE A RULE! WHY THE FUCK IS HE BREAKING A RULE IN EVERY FUCKING SEASON?! DUDE- what..Justin for fucks sake walk away from this shit, at what point will you realize youre in too deep? WHAT THE FUCK KINDA ENDING WAS THAT?!’ *gets up and grabs his cigarettes* ‘great now Brian isn’t the only one stressed, worried and annoyed’ He is now outside walking up and down and talking to our mom all angry about how Justin is risking his life and being an idiot and then he just randomly went ‘but at least brian is looking really good this season. I feel like this might be his season where he finally thrives’ …safe to say he is wrong.

Brian really does look so good in the bathhouse scene. Also let's note Justin being happy to leave Brian there - this is not a kid who suddenly wants monogamy and marriage a year later, okay?

GOOD FOR YOU VICKY BOY! LIVE THAT LONG HAPPY LIFE BABY!

Oh Anon, oh dear sweet anon.... you're going to need to get some tissues for your brother.

That shower scene is so good. Brian is worried and pissed. He didn't scrap Justin off the parking garage floor just for him to risk his life being stupid.

i really like this Brian. Something feels different, i fuck with it. he is full of advices lately! CHARACTER GROWTH!

‘but at least brian is looking really good this season. I feel like this might be his season where he finally thrives’ …safe to say he is wrong. I mean he does look good the whole season, but yeah there's that whole cancer thing... Poor brother.

[crownonacat]

Prompt #20: Hamper

Part 2 to Prompt 15's fill

No TW or spoilers for anything past ARR though there's some for a dungeon you find in ARR

Once again featuring friends characters ^^

The Shroud is quiet, very green, and full of Elezen that give the three of them - two Keepers and an Au Ra whistling behind them - odd looks as they pass. So the classic Gridanian experience at its finest if not somewhat less so because they'd chosen to start searching for their fourth from the Middle of the Shroud rather than an aetheryte in the main city.

"He told you he'd be near Bentbranch?" Clow said.

"He said 'the Shroud or in there somewhere anyway' before he cut the linkpearl."

Clow squinted at the unbroken line of trees, all leafy and tall and obscuring vision for malms around.

"The Shroud is...everywhere Able. We're in the Shroud."

"Well then he'll be-", Able huffed cutting himself off to wave at the trees, "Somewhere."

"Somewhere?"

"Somewhere", Able snapped, swatting at the back of his neck as he pulled out a map. In theory, Bentbranch was a downright pleasant place to be. In theory. In theory, all of the Shroud was a nice place to live, until you acquainted yourself with Nature's bounty in its forests that manifested itself in the forms of gnats and insects and other more horrible worldly wonders such as the humidity that stuck to your skin like a second layer in the heights of summer. It was early spring in Eorzea. Which meant it was less sticky than it could have been but still - unfortunately - wet and - perhaps most importantly - cold.

Clow blamed its close proximity to Coerthas. Or the icy looks from all the Elezen. Or both depending on how petty he was choosing to feel at the moment. Gridania tended to bring out the worst in him and even now Clow could feel his annoyance at the ridiculous number of trees and lack of the one person they'd come here to find causing his lip to curl.

"And you're sure he didn't say anything more specific?" Clow asked slowly.

"Well I heard what sounded like squawking and then something heavy falling, so. No."

"That's...helpful."

"Isn't it just?"

"Hm", Celestia said before blinking down at Eos in confusion. The fairy had been waving her hands, doing air jumping jacks to draw her attention.

"Well he hates the North Shroud", Clow said eyeing map, "So we could scratch that one off the list?"

"Yeah but he might have just chosen to go there anyway."

"...why?"

Able shrugged. "Besides him being im the Norh Shroud would also explain the heavy sound and the squawking. Plenty of Ixal there and everything is at least half a malm off the ground near Fallgourd Float."

"Oh- thats true."

Eos did loops in the air again before clapping her hands in front of her face against her mouth, opening and closing shut rapidly. Celestia squinted. It looked, if you were being very imaginative, like a beak or the mouth of an angry fish. She nodded slowly.

"I was thinking Baderon's maybe", Clow said.

"Oh, maybe", Able muttered. "The Quarrymill might be a better place to start looking too."

Eos took a moment to hang her head limply in midair, her hands slack at her sides in a full body pout, before she began ferociously pointing in the direction of the sheds. Celestia nodded slowly following Eos' finger. Yes, the sheds and the stables next to the sheds were important. No shed meant no seeds or harvested ghysal greens and no ghysal greens meant angry chocobos which meant a lot of-

"Oh", Celestia said loudly in understanding. "Oh."

Eos gave a sigh of relief. Clow and Able blinked from where they'd been hovering over the map.

"What 'oh'", Able asked.

Celestia pointed, not at the sheds but at the stables. "Chocobo."

"Oh", Clow whispered.

"The squawking", Able said in realization.

---

So. The good news was they'd found where Weylin had been. The bad news was that he was currently not in.

"Looking for a Hrothgar? Was he a short fellow around the height of a Hyur and then some? White, blue-black stripes?"

"Aye, you've seen him then?" Clow said.

The stablehand nodded. "He came through here a little while ago. He looked to be in a bit of a rush but you should be able to catch up if you hurry."

"Any ideas where he could be headed?"

Clow saw the stablehand hesitate, his eyes flicking between the three of them and lingering on their weapons before he sighs.

"The manor. The haunted one that the adventurers keep needing to clear out- he looked like he was heading up there."

[virtue-and-beneviolence]

*ehem*

im gonna start this off by saying this year will mark 4 years of me with this bitch as not just an f/o, but my main f/o

Keigo Takami, better known by his hero name, Wing Hero: Hawks ! from My Hero Academia. where do I even start with this asshole. being the number 2 pro hero of japan, he is cocky beyond belief in the best most infuriating way. i couldnt even begin to explain how much or for all the reasons I love and adore this stupid birdman, so instead I offer whatever this word vomit is

now I have *checks doc* 4.6k of just basic information about us written out so I'll try to give you the cliff notes version. I was originally going to school to become a search and rescue focused hero, but a villain incident during my 3rd year left me unable to continue with that plan. ending up in a low paying desk job, to get some extra income I signed up for one of the sugar daddy finding websites. and what do you know it just so happened to be keigo that was interested in being my sugar daddy. *insert devloping relationship, angst, and a time skip* wham bam a loving committed relationship is born. neither of us are the best at taking care of ourselves, but gods know we take care of each other

now enjoy some stupid random things pulled straight from my google doc;

He coos back at pigeons and will talk about "the pigeon tea". He talks about it so seriously that no ones knows if he actually can talk to the pidgeons or not

*puts on a sheet with slits for his wings for halloween* im a poultry-geist

late night slap happy holding his face v seriously asks “keigo can you talk to pigeons” “....coo” “tHATS NOT AN ANSWER???” v serious whisper “i am the pigeon whisperer”

obligatory picrew

and a few more photos bc hes pretty and I want to show him off

I don't have a ship playlist but I do have one for keigo that has a lot of love songs thrown in bc I'm a lovesick bitch so

I don't have a ship playlist for us but I do have one for keigo that has sappy songs in it bc I'm a lovesick bastard and of course that bled into his character playlist are you kidding me. so have that

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◇─◇──◇── @mimic-of-hysy  x Hawks! ──◇──◇─◇

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□ I wanna start with just how badly I think Hawks needed you in his life. Someone who can know him and love his every eccentricity, give him a reason care for himself by caring for you.

□ Something tells me he was never ashamed of having fallen in love with a non-famous hero. That he was so fully supportive of you in everyway and only annoyed by busybodies who asked when he'd grow out of this phase with you. His reaction, his publicist reminds him, could have messed with his ranking. He couldn't care less.

□ I think the public grows to love you too, for the record.

□ Why do I see him trying so hard to bake cookies for you as a surprise??

□ He has 100% "taught" you some bird speak. Jury is out on whether it was just to give himself a giggle or not. The mystery of does he REALLY speak PIGEON??? continues.

□ You love to tease him about the one time he walked into your balcony door, because holy shit, he turned himself into the silliest fucking stereotype. You occasionally bid him goodbye with a kiss and an affectionate, "don't fly into any windows today, birdbrain."

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did I assume wrong?? yall are publicly together now,, right?

I'd love to hear more about the early days. The sneaking around and how quickly you both felt the connection hehe

ALSO ARE THE WINGS SOFT I NEED TO KNOW HOW SOFT THE WINGS ARE IM SORRY.

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Come make my day, tell me about your self ship, and get some hcs of your own.

[drawing-way-outside-the-lines]

➖ Mature content, 18+ ➖ check the trigger tags each time ➖      

Chapter 5 - Have Yourself A Merry Little Christmas. Episode 2.

Evan: Well thats our gang, and dont worry, we arent per say a gang, we just call it that way. I feel I maybe should say a bit more about Andy and Congo, as they are a big part of the gang as well. Congo is 49 years old, making him the oldest member of "the gang". He is a carpenter, very warm hearted, very tall, very big and bulgy guy with hair on his chest and arms. A real muscly teddy bear. He is kind, compassionate, loving, caring, really just a great guy who always wants to help. And then there's Andy. Smart, willstrong, reckless, passionate, strong, artistic in so many ways, flirty, cheeky, and add to all of that a dash of crazy. He is wonderful really. I could talk about him for hours, and I probably will end up doing so… but still I wouldnt be able to give him half as much credit as I want to. I admire him. Really. And now as I have mentioned the gang, I just wanna round it all of by quickly introducing Andy's family as we also shared Christmas with. Leonard, Andy's dad. 52 years old. Goes by the name Lenny. Very intelligent, great humor, a real family man always trying his best to help where he can. Katherine, Andy's mom, goes by the name Kat. 51 years old, very sweet and kind woman, very loving, a bit of a hen mom, very protective of Andy, but there is many understandable reasons for that, reasons Im sure most people would be able to understand if they knew. George, Andy's uncle, Lenny's big brother. 63 years old. Highly educated psychologist and Andy's therapist. Very down to earth, very caring and friendly. And last but not least, George's wife Gabriella. Mostly goes by the name Gaby. Shes much younger than George, actually only 33 years old. But they seem to have a very loving, yet open relationship. They are allowed to have sex with others, as long as they use protection. She is sweet, filled with positive energy, nature loving, a bit of a hippy although the right term in her opinion, is Gypsy. She is very beautiful, spiritual and knows a bit of white magic. She is an educated sexologist, and often advices Andy, trying to guide him through his new sexuality. I tend to keep a bit of a distance to her, she looks almost identical with my ex… the one I broke off with just before Christmas. Only she has darker skin, and less bitchy attitude.

Right, as I were saying; Christmas day… the whole gang was gathered at the ranch to celebrate Christmas and hopefully at the same time lift all our spirits a bit as well. It had been a rough past couple of months for most of us, so it was safe to say we needed a bit of fun. So we all decided to head to the nearby park. Fresh air would do us all good. It was gently snowing, everyone was chatting and trying to catch up on news from each others lives, some started building snowmen, while others had snowball fights. I looked around, Andy wasnt anywhere to be seen, so I left the group to go search for him. I found him quickly, I had been wondering why he was dragging a backpack around, and why he had had a smirk on his face while walking to the park. Turned out the idiot knew there were a small pond, and of course he had brought ice skates. This is the man who can dance like you see in the movies, you know Step up and shit, but still he can manage to trip over his own shadow. I laughed as he twirled around himself like a ballerina, he is always doing crazy shit like that. He laughed at me, pointed at the bag and told me he brought a pair for me as well. I couldnt figure if it was a bad or good idea, but I guess it was either the skates or building a snowman with Daniel that kept eagerly yelling my name. A snowman he would give up on half way through, and leave me to finish. So I grabbed the skates. I shook my head while tying them on, thinking there was no way this could end up well, as I hadnt worn skates since my early teens, but despite all warning signs flashing, I let myself glide out on the ice. Turns out ice skating is a bit like riding a bike, you never really forget how it works. We skated around for a while, just circling the pond, enjoing the fresh cold air on our cheeks, making them blush deep red. Andy kept smiling happily, it was easy to see he needed this. The freedom. Truthfully he is much like a child still, lets just say he had a rough start at life. Its really not anything I wanna get into. Cause Im not sure I can handle reminding myself about it. But sometimes, its easy to see the child still living in him. I guess thats one of the many reasons why we all tend to be protective towards him, well that and his suicide attempts also added to the constant feeling of protecting him, and the constant worry. I had missed seeing him smile like this. Happy. Worry free. I found myself getting lost in his bright smile, so when he grabbed my hand, I at first didnt notice. I guess I had already gotten quite used to him holding it when we were hiding somewhere alone. However, as I did notice, I stopped and quickly put both my hands in my pockets.

Andy: Frowned lightly What? He pointed towards the group they are pretty far away, and they are all bussy playing or yapping… no one is gonna see us. He reached his hand towards mine Come on man… lets take a spin.

Me: I looked towards the group, he was right, they were pretty far away, maybe they wouldnt notice? I looked at his hand, hesitating, and just as he looked like he was going to give up on me, I grabbed his hand okay… a quick spin…

Andy: His smile grew big and wide, and made his eyes sparkle, damned if he didnt knew how beautiful his eyes were in that state. He grabbed my other hand as well, and started slowly spinning us around on the ice, chuckling softly see… we are well hidden by the bridge… and I bet no one has even noticed we are gone anyway, I bet I could even kiss you without anyone noticing he winked at me and smiled cheekily

Me: No, dont! For a guy with a pretty deep voice, I find it hard to understand why my voice suddenly came out as a squeaky girl voice, and I blushed deep red

Andy: He chuckled hoarse since when do you blush?

Me: I looked down on our hands as I felt my cheeks get even warmer

Andy: He tilted his head and chuckled in the same hoarse tone and since when are you shy?

Me: I stopped and looked at him with a glare

Andy: Chuckled warmly alright alright, I'll shut my big mouth…. I'll try to behave okay?

Me: I chuckled softly and shook my head as I started spinning again We both know thats near impossible.

Andy: He chuckled cheekily and pointed his tongue at me You know me so well.

Me: *I chuckled softly, thinking to myself he was right. I had known him almost 15 years, it just seemed like Andy had always been in my life, one way or another. I observed his at that point green mohawk, the snow flakes getting caught in it as we were spinning around, his eyesbrow piercing, the new piercing on his nose bridge, his lip piercing, and as I sniffled my runny nose, I felt the cold metal of my own septum piercing. Just yesterday he had complained that my snake bite piercings in my bottom lip had been like and I quote him 'kissing a cold lamp post' so I had taken them out for the day. Not that we could kiss anywhere around here anyway, but just in case an oportunity would drop. It was hard to see anything but Andy, the slowly falling snow surrounded his well proportioned face, made his high cheekbones look even more pink from the cold, he was gorgeous, and I longed for his lips. I got so lost in him, spinning on that pond, and I think he got lost in me too. So lost we didnt even notice Daniel had snuck up on us, and was now enjoying life as a paparazzi. He was alrady on to us, and determined to get a proof. But for now the rest of the world didnt exist, it was only Andy, the falling snow and I. Well that was until we both lost ballance.

[amynmacaron]

19, 26, 30, 32, 35, n 38 owo

19. do you think grass and bug are distinctly different pokemon types, or largely the same and incorrectly categorized?

WH.HOW.H O W.IS A PLANT.AND A BUG.SUPPOSED TO BE THE SAME THING???????WHAT JUST BC THEYRE ASSOCIATED WITH GREEN??????????????HELLO???????????????????

26. pokeblocks, poke puffs, poffins, poke beans, curry, or sandwiches?

OOGH i dont wanna sound biased but i ADORE pokepuffs honestly ive made human grade pokepuffs just so me and my pokemon could all have them NSJDKDJF but i do love a good curry too<3ive never been to galar but i rlly do wanna go one day bc thats where my bestie lives And for the curry<3

30. what is your least favorite pokemon type?

IF ANY STEEL TYPE EVEN MAKES EYE CONTACT WITH ME I WILL EXPLODE.except the tinkaton line tinkaton can stay<3

32. have you encountered any rare or unusual pokemon?

enough so that people question how and why i have the pokemon i have XD but thats understandable tbh bc 1. fun fact praline is shiny! 2. just wait until i reveal what kinda pokemon honey is...........im too shy to do so yet but no ones gonna believe me if i dont have pictures anyways KSJDKDJJF

35. did any of your pokemon have temperament issues when they first evolved? how did you handle it?

praline and cannoli were definitely moody for a while when they evolved; it helped praline a lot to have her battle more than she did as a buneary, and she also received a lopunnite as an evolution gift from a friend which made her very happy!!i made sure to ease her into mega evolving to not cause her any more issues tho since she had just evolved after all sjjdjsjf cannoli however was more of a tricky case, she became pretty bossy, and both a clean freak and destructive at the same time!!!she didnt seem to want to battle tho, so i was stumped on how to help with her aggression, until i noticed that whenever after she ripped something apart she would immediately clean it up and then go hide under my weighted blanket. i did some searching and turns out she became even more sensitive to touch once she evolved, and rlly dirty things now seemed to overstimulate her!!i got her her own mini weighted poke doll to carry around when she cleans, and it helped her a lot ^_^ cinccino also produce a kind of oil to help clean their fur, and she wasnt making much of it early on in her evolution, so it also got better the more oil she started producing. macaron also lends a hand with her calming aura when things get too overwhelming for her jshdjsjd

38. what pokemon did you grow up thinking was rare only to find out theyre common elsewhere?

I ACTUALLY HAVE THE OPPOSITE EXPERIENCE i caught sprinkles in paldea, and her pattern is called the fancy pattern!!when i returned to kalos with her a lot of people were surprised to see a vivillon with her pattern; i found out that apparently fancy vivillon are just as common as any other vivillon in paldea, but in kalos, theyre so rare that many people think theyre effectively nonexistent in the wild anymore!!!

[life-archive]

I am looking forward to that day, when I can cross paths with someone who is genuine. Hard to find that nowadays.

Sound petty to feel sorry for myself, but I havent found genuine love in my lifetime yet. I had fulfilling relationships that I now see as great lessons but I never had someone who was willing to put everything down for me (exaggerating for this entry only). I never had anyone really "fight for me" or let alone just make "ligaw" - haha might sound so oldschool but i want to know how it feels to be wanted? if that makes any sense.

My relationships were all created upon drunkness and lust. Im not invalidating what I had with those three relationships but I dont want to be the one making the initiative for everything. All three of those relationships started - and lasted - because of my initiating.

I want someone who is willing to understand me. Although I want someone now, I just dont know if I can let down my walls and free some emotional space to care for another right now, not after many painful heartbreaks.

After the accident too - I know I need someone who will be there for me, like really be there. Not just be there for the relationship. I need someone who is willing to put the same initiative into the relationship, with dates, energy and willingness to work and understand. I want someone who I can have intellectual conversations, but with good humor. I need someone who understands that I need physical time together and who will reassure me when I am possessive and jealous - I know, Im working on that too.

I know i can give alot to a partner, one thing that I havent been is loyal. Contradicting considering how much of myself I give to my partners. Maybe because I never saw them as permanent people in my life. I just needed someone to not be alone.

But i think thats why its great that im alone now, so I can be aware that Im ok alone, and to work on my possessiveness/jealousy. Thats the only thing I dont understand about myself - I am possessive and jealous when it comes to people i love. My family, my siblings, and partners - luckily not my friends. Im searching for reasons, the only thing in the top of my head is that maybe im afraid of abandonment. Cliche, but i think it stems from when I was younger, i know I had my sister, I know i had my family when I had no friends. I was lonely in my early teen years and the only people who were really there for me was my family. And so i think i tend to cling onto those people, so that even if the world would leave me I would be okay. But it gets unhealthy to the point that I am pushing them away but ignoring boundaries.

I am aware that I was not the best partner in my relationships, but I am working on it. And I hope I can be the best mature version of myself when I meet my person. I hope you come soon though, its getting kind of lonely third wheeling my parents and my sister. I'd like to know how genuine love feels like, and what kind of love you'll offer me with.

random thought: do I ever cross my exes minds? I think of them every now and then, but knowing how they might all hate me after our breakups - do they ever think about, how am i doing? As I do to them. I miss them, but I am aware that I never want to be in a relationship with them again. Im just the type of person that - I gave a big part of myself with these people and i have to live on with my life knowing that they have that part of me with them forever. I hope I dont sound weird, but in a way thats how I feel. I always believed in the idea that you loved them in the relationship, and just because it ended doesnt mean that you'd have to stop loving them - but maybe just in a different way now.

there was a week where I was thinking about all the what if's with one ex. And immediately I dreamnt of that ex and I getting back together. I remember feeling on cloud 9 that I was back with the comfort of familiarity. And the closest relationship to what I think was genuine. But i remember that ex saying yes to officially getting back together and I vividly felt the emotion of anxiety. Anxious because I worked so hard on moving on from the trauma, the toxicness, and the pain that person gave me. Anxious because I knew that ex was not someone I would spend my life with - and which made me even more anxious knowing that it felt like impending doom, like it is bound to end again and that I will put myself through that heartache again. Anxious that maybe I cant be loyal yet. My emotions were so vivid that I almost thought it was not a dream. I woke up as if it was a wake up call from god. But also made me realise - i may want them back now because I have been single for the whole pandemic and that im lonely. But if it'd actually happen, it wouldnt be the best idea either.

I dont know where this post is going, but Im really just speaking my mind. I just hope that I will never have to go through this again - the process of giving myself (another piece of myself) to someone, and them taking that piece of me away forever. I feel empty already. I miss my old self who was not heartbroken and who was naive. But thats the point of life right? To learn from mistakes. But I am proud of myself nonetheless, i think my last relationship - which I realised was my most shallow relationship, but was my wake up call - because I realised my self worth and did not let that ex break that. Especially not after all the other heartbreaks.

Hope that I can only grow from here on!

To my future self, have you found him yet? is he treating you good? is he close to your family? you havent had an ex who has the balls to meet your family yet, so I hope he can finally be the cherry on top! Hoping all is well for you, I only want the best for you. We've gone through so many painful lessons, so let's not go backwards anymore - if you are feeling as so, lets get back up again. It's always not too late.

[whiivyn]

.I did not know that.at all. Holy fuck WHAT

so, timeskip to where I read niigo and wxs wl and...I just remembered when reading that, but isn't there a bunny plushie in her untrained reborn card ? for a child, calling it usa (when rabbit in japanese is usagi if im not spouting bullshit) wouldnt be too odd. also reminded me of the fact that mafuyu is linked to a few bunny things, like in the reborn untrained where's there a book with a black rabbit and a white one, that the apples in that same card are shaped like ones, then there's the event with the hinomori sisters and mafuyu as a 2* (so of course, I went back to watch where mafuyu was in that event on the first place as well as her card story and also the reborn event while I'm at it and what I got from it was that there wasn't really stuff bunny related. sad. BUT BUT BUT. in her past room, there was still little personality from mafuyu apart from two bunny plushies, one darker and the other lighter. in the reborn card the darker one is visible, being hugged and nothing about the lighter one. I have something to say about those plushies when talking about her sekai but that's essentially the only childish thing there is in her room even though she is very young at the time (before the memory from bug happened ? you see how young that is) the only thing is that when mafuyu asks for the apples to be cut like bunnies, her mom mentions how she really likes them. thats all I found regarding bunnies and i spent way too much time over that.)

anyway. there's the picture book (which writes itself im sorry WHAT-) involving a female bunny who is literally mafuyu, so yeah more bunny imagery woo (also searched if rabbits symbolise anything and found they represent longevity, good luck and prosperity. prosperity is the only one really fitting her because she was doing well but not really mental health wise sooo. yeah.) and the rest of the group as dog, hedgehog and cat and all I have to say about this is that in some future event the book might be used to realize what the problem is because the characters view are biased so they can read the problem simplified then apply a solution and bam problem fixed. sorta. yeah that's just speculation there but I should keep on talking about this so I will.

it also seems the lake contains stuff that different people can see. like ena for example saw her drawing from inandensu and the kagamines couldn't see it, and it makes sense that the medical book gets picked up by mafuyu and the picture book is weird anyway so we'll say since it's her story it isn't weird to be picked up by her.

now the child. Holy fuck. what. so, this child is probably a younger version of mafuyu, and that wouldn't be weird for her to be here since it is her sekai after all. I've just got one tiny problem with that, the reason you enter this sekai in the first place. aka wanting to disappear. so why the fuck is there a child there, makes even less sense since at the time she was still alright. the fact its her sekai means it could be coming from her feelings, and since she had a dream about it making a child wander in the sekai at the same time would fit but it's still weird. an interesting thing is how the plushie stays inside the lake in the end, because the child did not want to risk kanades safety. which okay, makes sense but that means she doesn't have the plushie anymore, so does that moment also serves as a way to represent her starting to lear her true self behind for others, here by a plushie she doesn't have anymore ? that sounds awful since she's so young there but would fit since it got worse with time and her mother would definitely want her to stop being as childish quite early on ig

that was one big mess ooof. Well don't worry it gets possibly worse ! because now I gotta talk about tsukasa sekai this already took one hour to write with the time I spent reading the stories way too much effort us being put into trying go understand this mess

so. with the wl change there's a ship and after the emu event (arc ender) they quit the park and the two event safer that was them doing stuff in tigers places, so its easy to say that the ship represents leaving and going on other adventures. that part is easy. now the phoenix is a direct reference to tsukasa3 and represents his dream ? either way phoenix are known for immortality and everything, so longevity just like the bunnies I mentioned earlier and I find that especially cool.

the plushies also are a reference to wxs, androids for rui, mermaids for nene so I'm gonna guess their islands are representing their past shows and future plushies will appear from new shows. the zombie plushies are a reference to the halloween event with rui, with them being different than others and in the end choosing to just not try and get along with people since it never worked (so yeah, middle school rui here. won't elaborate more on that since we're not here to talk about him, so I'll keep it short with the other members that aren't tsukasa). so the same parallel thing happens with nene and turtle about her singing, same with emu.

now, tsukasa. catching the phoenix is a reference to his role in tsukasa3. I don't really have anything to say since this isn't new stuff. what I do have to say however is that the map in wxs is kind of like the picture book from n25 and I guess the other units also have an item like that but I'm already spent another hour to look at wxs wl I am not going to go read those to confirm what is probably the case. there's also a bud growing next to the tree like in empty sekai so again, I'll guess it's there in the other sekais. I'm also guessing future vs event will be related to that, like the plant growing and them interacting with each other as a result because its in every sekai or smth

another thing I noticed is that the ship makes its path to star Island. but yk, ships can do a funny thing called sinking which would result in it not reaching its destination. could be fun no ? the ship can't leave the spot to go there rn because tsukasa isn't ready to being a star yet

the only conclusion to this is I spent way too much time writing this, unfortunately have very little to say about tsukasa because i used all my brain power on mafuyu and that if we keep talking about them we'll need to mention their songs and that will be one sweet mess

hot take ??

the only reason people say that "mafuyu and tsukasa have nothing in common" when presented with mafukasa parallels is because they equate mafuyu and tsukasa being similar to "tsukasa has depression" because the fandom equates mafuyu's personality to being depressed and nothing else.

it doesn't help that people (primarily younger people in the fandom) who DO believe in mafukasa parallels end up making the mistake of portraying tsukasa as depressed because as of right now he is not (although it's possible he was in past because of his Very Unclear Middle School Backstory but that's irrelevant)

anyways, mafuyu and tsukasa are narrative foils because their core personalities are built off of the concept of wanting to make the people around them— especially their families— happy.

they both developed personalities at a young age based on someone they looked up to. for tsukasa, it was seiichi amami's performance that inspired him to be a star— a hero that could cheer anyone up. for mafuyu, it was her mother taking care of her that inspired her to be a nurse— and you can see the similarities from there.

for mafuyu, her identity would first come into conflict when her mother expressed her want for mafuyu to be a doctor— suddenly, "everyone's" happiness didn't match what she wanted to do, leaving her in a state of disorder and eventual depression.

for tsukasa, his identity was something he nearly forgot in its entirety at the start of the main story— becoming arrogant and fully absorbed in a hero persona, forgetting the kind person he truly is. furthermore, his current character arc seems to be foreshadowing that what "being a star" to him is going to be called into question— maybe it is something more than just being the main character that saves everyone.

their insecurities are incredibly similar.

in mafuyu's first mixed, mafuyu feels insecure towards ichika because unlike ichika, she feels as if her lyrics have no genuine meaning to be expressed to other people— despite them being her very real feelings. this is brought up again in her second mixed as well.

in tsukasa's third focus event, something similar happens. when watching seiichi's performance, he thinks that his acting is "real" and feels inferior towards him, which is ironic because tsukasa has been method acting this whole time. when tsukasa is acting out rio or bartlett or really anyone at this point in the story, it's not just those characters— it's a reflection of his traumas.

just like mafuyu, tsukasa undermines his passions he's poured his feelings into because someone else's work is more genuine in his eyes.

now, then, foils have many similarities and parallels (and i could honestly list a lot more), but how i define them is that they usually have some kind of major branching difference that MAKES them foils.

for mafuyu and tsukasa it's pretty straightforward.

mafuyu's people pleasing behavior comes from external expectations and pressures— her mother's demands.

tsukasa's people pleasing behavior comes internally, from himself— if he can't meet his own standards, if he can't be the perfect big brother or the perfect star, then he is nothing.

and even then, there's some overlap.

tsukasa's behavior was indirectly encouraged by his mother praising him for being a "good big brother" over the phone instead of asking him if he was okay while home alone.

mafuyu's terrified to be herself around other people because she doesn't want to worry or bother them— she doesn't want to be a burden— and projects her mother's expectations onto them, not realizing that they would prefer the real mafuyu if they knew the truth.

and the concept of mafukasa being foils is most perfectly and blatantly portrayed in these two cards.

mafuyu, the marionette, sitting limp on the floor— puppeteered by her mother's demands and donning a mask to hide her true self.

tsukasa, the jester, standing above everything else— puppeteering silenced plushies— his feelings. he's not being completely honest with himself, and he doesn't even realize it.

mafuyu has cut her strings and ripped her mask in half. she has acknowledged her true feelings and expressed them to her mother, even if she had to run away in the end.

tsukasa has not yet cut his.