#thats unrelated. thats whatever.
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i was so confident that my bsf and i would never end bc we never fight- i never accounted for simply drifting. oops 😋😋
#┈ ✴ ﹙rambling﹚#im scared lowkey#like what do i do we are talking about my everything for the past 5 years#she doesnt even reply to my damn texts anymore#but she can text my fucking sister an essay ig#thats unrelated. thats whatever.#i *have* been walking on eggshells for the greater part of this relationship#and making new friends thru college orientation *has* felt like a breath of fresh air in terms of basic human interaction#first time in a really really long time that ive spoken about being trans or my interests or my opinions or even my day#(u get the picture)#without fear of being belittled#but like i love her and another reason im scared is bc shes lowkey all i've known for the past 5 years#but like im just so uncomfortable around her all the time#being abused by ur bsf for a year will do that to u ig lmao#and this is just me venting a lil. not saying im gonna like fully cut her off or anything bc like why would i do that#but the relationship is so obviously fizzling out and like im just sitting here watching it burn out#it was already hard bc if i tried to say something about my interests or myself in general#she would mock me or change the subject to be about her#and ignore me flat out if neither of those options worked#but now she goes for hours and doesnt say shit#ugh whatever its whatever
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Can I ask if you guys have any official Kirby pet peeves. Mine is the 30 million official renditions of Green Greens. I love Kirby, I get that it's his theme, I just don't think there needs to be like 500 of them in the Kirby Cafe vinyls. I think we can go a long way if they made more songs based on like... actual BGM from single stages rather than making Green Greens #24
#IM TIRED OF GREEN GRESNS CAN WE GET SOMETHING ELSE#i like the songs where they use a couple samples of older soundfonts esp from dl3#dl 3 grass 3 sounds rlly earthboundy (ik hal worked on earthbound too) sorry thats unrelated#etc#also i hate sand levels we need to get rid of those. but ik its like. removing an element of nature so whatever
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idk if ive ever posted abt it but i reeeeally really dont like how much studio orange made sure we remember vash is nai's little brother and nai is the older one (even if thats not even the case, because theyre twins.) its so overplayed and feels incestuous, considering the common theme in anime with the sexualised 'onii-chan' bullshit. idk. as far as i remember in trimax vash is referred to as the little brother ONCE by knives and a few times by elendira who obviously makes fun of it, and it's like orange took advantage of the fact that it's canon and fed into it a little too much. it also adds to the power imbalance narrative that fandoms love so much and gives people a chance to make vash helpless in a sexual context. uhhh end rant before i forget my point which is that it feels weird
#and it's deliberate. they *want* the incest under(?)tones because it attracts people but by doing so#they change vash and knives' whole relationship#and im not saying you cant read their relationship in trimax as incest if thats what floats your boat#but i dont feel like the implications are really there the same way theyre in tristamp#whatever#also make nai wear clothes or be completely naked pls choose what is this bodysuit situation\#<- unrelated but forever true#trigun#vash the stampede#trigun maximum#millions knives#shut up stef#trigun stampede
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RODBT therapist @ the group: Does anyone have any examples of situations that generated complex emotions?
Me: Well... recently, scintists identified the remains of James Fitzjames who died in the Franklin expedition for the Northwest Passage like 176 years ago... it made me feel a lot of things...
#also i need u to kno that i was wearing cat ears and had drawn a cat nose and whiskers on my face#bc our homework from last week was to engage in novel and silly behavior and i thought it would get me silly points#they had to try to figure out what compex emotions i was feeling and landed on: sadness and compassion#bc the news made me really uncomfortable. which is y i didnt rb any of the posts going around#bc something about knowing this person had been identified along with the idea that there was no one who actually knew him#to take comfort in having found him is so eerie and sad. and like of course there r ppl who kno him as a historical figure but thats not#really knowing someone. so its like celebrating for the echo of a person. and there's something sad and haunting about that#the existential horror of being only remembered by the physical effects you left on the world. by which i mean ur writing and the actions u#proformed in order to make other ppl think u were worth writing about for whatever reason#i dunno. i suppose it should b a happy thing but i guess it just makes me feel really sad. not in a bad way exactly.#just. i dunno. its weird and sad#unrelated#and then theres the additonal thing of ppl only knowing this historical figure thru the show
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what do we think about pet store workers team xen
#for the pet thing i had a bit ago#neved doesnt work with them hes just a delivery driver for some of their supplies. he mostly helps out with his wifes orphanage#idk if clear kieran and eden are around too or not though im not thinking that hard about it#jenner used to work there too but he quit and works for something at home#hes like a stay at home dad now or something#cassandra is either part of corporate or shes just the evil mayor of gdc still and has no affiliation to them idk#she still has something going on with madelis no matter what though#eli and sharon work part time and ren is like the guy who gets them coffee or something. runs delivery too maybe#regina comes in sometimes too to flirt with nastasia when she can but thats like a side thing and completely unrelated#btw zepto is like a clay figure zetta made and is either alive or just a figure. you decide#sorry i was trying to think of something rejuv related to draw and ended up thinking a little too hard about the pet thing. my bad#pokemon rejuvenation#if you have no idea what im talking about with the pet thing its just rejuv but they have weird looking pets instead of pokemon#and i guess technically a modern au. whatever. melia still has the power of god and anime in her. dont worry about it#zetta isnt a clone though hes just a guy. idk where he comes from but hes jenners son and melias older brother#im not drawing madame x im sorry. but know she really does show up to her store wearing all that and never takes it off. + the uniform#oh and nastasia still just straight up has deoxys. dw about it
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I keep spending too much time on sketches LMAOOO here's these idiots again
#i actually rlly like the posing for this one#lowkey proud of it#hooray 🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉#anyways ik i said theyre platonic but what wud their ship name be............#my first thought was like..... SnowRifle and i was loke “yeah that sounds cool i like it!!”#but i feel like i could come up w/ something better#friend suggested FrozenAccount or WinterWealth#i WOULD use ColdCash but thats taken (unrelated oc ship)#ehhhhfhenddhdhshd whatever im stickin w/ SnowRifle for now#Khaos' Stuff#Valorant#chamber#chamber valorant#vincent fabron#oc x canon#valorant oc#riot games#Valorant Oc: Frostbite
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- Proselfship Blocklist -
[ VERY IMPORTANT DISCLAIMER: NONE OF THIS IS AN INDICTMENT TO SEND ANON HATE, DEATH/RAPE THREATS, ANY ATTEMPT TO DOX/SWAT THEM OR TO BOTHER THEM IN ANY OTHER WAY. I AM ONLY LISTING THIS AS A WARNING FOR OTHER SELFSHIPPERS TO NOT HAVE THEM ACCIDENTALLY INTERACT WITH PROSHIP ACCOUNTS. DO NOT HARASS ANYONE LISTED. JUST BLOCK THEM PLEASE. ]
@/proship-mafuyu [very self-explantory; proshipper and mainly revolves around incest]
@/muttship [proshipper; selfships with teenage characters (asuka langley soryu from neon genesis evangelion is 14); ages their self insert up to their 20s in that ship (unfortunately the carrd featuring their self insert was deleted last time i checked)
@/engiewife [proshipper; misc (as in, a lot) but specifically depicts engineer from team fortress 2 as their self insert’s uncle]
@/rayday-mayday [proshipper; mainly revolves around incest]
@/burning--past [proshipper; misc but focuses on teenage characters, sh0tas, and incest]
[note: this is not a comprehensive list at all.]
#if i see one more l0lish0 in the selfship tag i swear to god-#this is NOT a comprehensive list. there were many pr0shipping accounts ive seen that were deactivated or inactive#this are just basic tl;drs of their accounts from a quick glance#i couldve gotten into one of them writing that their tf2 f/os would force them to detransition#(+ a unrelated account i wont disclose that keeps liking my posts despite my dni being on there)#but the basic shit should be enough#again in case this breaks containment or whatever; DO NOT harass anyone on this list#also please; block pr0ship tags if you want to not accidentally interact with them#alright i think thats it. have a good evening#incest tw#f/o blog#proships dni#selfship#selfship community#long post#< maybe
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guys i thought pregnant charles xavier was a joke…………………………
well you know what they say about jokes
#snap chats#always a lil bit of truth in them etc etc anyways congratulations to him and erik for their fucked up evil baby#UNRELATED. i have to throw up.#every time i chew gum for a while i start to want to throw up and ive been chewin this gum for A While#did you guys know sugar-free gum helps fight cavities ... aint that some shit .... learn something new everyday ...#it GOTTA have xylitol in it thats the part that helps#anyways ima start walkin to this lil club party whatever bye#oh god i should spit this gum out first tho there gonna be food there and also I Have To Vom
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yeah sure that's how i'll [re]come out
#zymart#zymtalk#rant in the tags ->#okay listen to me this is really important and also i have a witness. this was not intentionally supposed to be posted on june 1st#the stars just aligned for this to be at its funniest. which means its also easier for me to dismiss LOL#i drew this like a week ago after trying to draw a whole like. 5 page comic about it and then stopping it mid-board#bc it was horrifying imagining being perceived that much. so i needed to make it into a joke instead and this was the funniest route#and then i was like 'UGH. UGH!!!! i can not be 20 and deal with this like im 13. if i dont post it by the end of the week#then [the witness to all my rants on this topic. shoutout to twig bc they got the most of it] can joke abt it as if i did anyway'#and now its the end of the week and i looked at the date and went 'oh my god didnt may just start what happened'#'WAIT ITS JUNE FIRST. GOD. THATS TOO FUNNY TO NOT SAY SOMETHING' and who am i if i dont prioritize the bit honestly#in all honesty. kinda hate it! not bc of internalized homophobia but actually bc of internalized arophobia that has somehow been emphasized#after having my brain shift from '1000% aromantic without a doubt no exceptions' to 'just arospec ig lol??'#but tragically as it turns out. you can not just try and self analyze yourself into speedrunning closure.#horrible news for the oscar zymstarz community frankly#SO i needed a way 2 justify shoving this off my plate and into the trash as fast as possible.#im impatient and cant acknowledge my own emotions. its a flaw im working on it#oh and for all the ppl who know the running gag abt 'my allegations' [i do not have any real allegations for anyone not in jems server]:#that was in fact just a running gag for like well over a year and a half. like that was just a long running bit COMPLETELY unrelated to thi#i only started having this weird sexuality shift or whatever not too long ago lol. like long enough to go through 4 of the 5 stages of grie#[evidently bc like. im posting this. i got close enough to 5 to throw in the towel ykwim]#but on 'oscar zymstarz emotional acknowledgement' time that is....... not long.#but yeah ig tldr like. still ace [thank god] just arospec [probably demiro? i hate trying to figure out my own labels] instead of Aro now#idk none of this is that deep but also like it kinda is unfortunately bc i have to actually talk abt it to be able to ignore it ykwim#but i did! we're done talking abt it now! and now i can act like i dont care and try to make jokes about it to speedrun the rest of it#anyway. Happy Pride everyone. Fukign kitty.#side message to jem. by no means does this mean im not still gonna bully you. its a sign of love but also it is you specific bullying 🫶#you are not safe#edit: this is karma for saying 'thank god'. might be demiace too. this is the worst month of my life /j
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i am restricting myself from googling my medical ailments bc of my hypochondria and obsession with it but i have questions i need answered and dont want to pay a copay just to ask my doctor so my last resort is typing it here i guess .
#is there such thing as like withdrawal/hangover from a prescription steroid?? bc i am feeling fatigue and exhaustion after taking#and finishing my dose from a severe sinus infection#was also feeling very nauseous#plus i think i have an ear infection that started after taking it but thats unrelated i think.#whatever. i always think there’s something wrong with me and my doctor said everything was fine but then this happened#personal#drugs tw
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I retweeted (or however its written) a LAM twitter post (without me writing anything tho, just retweeting) but then got a bit nervous/paranoid that its most likely that Sean Brennan runs that account so i immediately deleted my other posts where i said he is so handsome and me posting "ALSLDLDLLSSAÑD" alongside pictures of him and some of him and ville valo cause what if he had seen them, like, i didnt said anything weird or wrong, it was just me saying that he is really beautiful
And because i was the first one to retweet it i kind of got nervous he might see my posts i mean ofc he would never see them but i still got nervous because that would be so embarrassing but i know that would never happen but im a nervous person 😭😭😭
#out of topic but i love him so much imlsaaaqq11111qlañapppppehht#im assuming he might run that account because he def runs the LAM instagram account cause he answers comments and also has posts unrelated-#to the band#and on the twitter account of lam theres a lot of retweets of political things like Sean's personal account there so its most likely-#he runs both accounts including the insta one#so thats why i got nervous 😭 (really dumb tho but whatever i already deleted them)#there werent even bad posts yk. it was just me saying how pretty he is but im so nervous about anything 😭#i mean i also said i need him and ville BUT not in a weird way 💀 that was all i said but that would be so embarrassing if he had seen it#which ofc he would have never seen them but whatever
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i need him in a way that is concerning to feminism
#im not a woman i just love that phrase so much#anyways sorry i havent been posting like at all ive been literally just playing botw#this is the ideal body structure for a man yall just haters#also whatever gender link has. thats me. i want that.#and honest to god its so much fun ive been having a blast. most of the time#some puzzles do suck dick and balls tho#and like. 10k rupees for a great fairy? jesus christ miss. what the scallop#but overall 10/10 experience cant wait to get to totk#unrelated to sidon but vaguely related to the post#me and my friends were going back and forth at lunch w sum fictional hear me outs#(no one wanted to hear me out for sidon (💔💔💔 theyre just haters))#we alll agreed that live action rodrick heffley (from the first two movies) is the ideal man. idc what yall say#one of them did say smth like oh you cant just put eyeliner on a man and call him hot#when like that's literally the rules?? sorry man i dont make them i just enforce em#but like thats written in lgbt law???#smh chat#anyways#im tired#my stuff#oh god that was a ramble#im so normal chat
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the day i learned that they poured their oil down the drain instead of throwing it away shouldve been my first signal. and yet i stayed blind
#xarra xarra#me: maybe you shouldnt throw away your oil its not good for the plumbing. them: lol its only a little bit#yeah i get that thats not your house but? oh my god?????#also unrelated but the fact that im the only 'nonbinary' in their '2024 dating wrapped' lol ok. now i just wonder if they count me as masc#or if im just masc Lite to them. i would sooooo ask them. bc idk why (i think im imagining this convo we had im not sure)#but at one point i felt like they implied that they didnt see me that masc at all. which fair bc i dont LOOK too masc#(and definitely not butch). but lol. one thing is to think that and another is to be told that the person u like doesnt see you#or isnt trying to see you like how you'd like. whatever. im pretty sure this happened. but the vlc visit was.#very intense. so i may be projecting
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...
#oh lads. its not looking good for my genomics exam on Thursday. its all fucked#i dunno. its just been a weird day. bc one of my lab mates is getting ready to go to the astr0biology science conference#and its just so wild how i got here. into the perfect position. i have a great advisor. a great phd project. a committee member who is super#integrated with n4sa astr0biology projects. and so many of the instructors are amazing. my genomics prof is terrifyingly smart#so is my advisor and his wife. and the program is great. ecology and Evolution. its perfect. its all perfect#and yet. and yet. it just feels like its all falling apart. ive lost that compulsive thing thats always set in my chest#and now all i want to do is lay on the floor and cry and sleep and not do anything. why am i so tired?#its just so frustrating. and im sure ive got the most wretched vibes bc im constantly like 1 comment away from bursting into tears#like 2 weeks and its done. then im off to find a summer job. and find a long term job. and consider throwing away everything ive ever worked#toward. just let it all burn. im so tired. and i dont get to see my therapist until Monday. thats gonna b fun#hi. hello. since last i saw you my life has crumbled into pieces. ugh. i just dont wanna fail this genomics exam but it looks like that's#where we're headed. maybe i should have just dipped out of these last 3 weeks. but no. i didnt want to leave the lady i ta for 100 lab#reports to unexpectedly have to grade 4 days before grades are due. ugh. itll b fine. i mean it wont but whatever#unrelated
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i do think its kinda funny when i see someone in the year of our lord 2024 talk about vocal synth music like its all gone downhill since like 2010 because like dont get me wrong i love a good niconicodouga-ass 2008 ass vocaloid joint BUT also like. the past couple years have had the most fascinatingly creative and expressive uses of vocal synthesizers ive ever heard in my life DJFSKHJDFS dont write it all off just yet!!
#usually i only see that from people who havent actually listened to any vsynth music from the past 15 years so i understand why they got to#that conclusion. and also usually theyre people who didnt listen to much vsynth music in the first place LOL they just dont know#but it is still a little funny. brother there are things beyond your wildest dreams if u just look#like some personal highlights: the stuff by rinri - particularly their use of the meika girlies#dont carry our memories away is LIFECHANGING the whispers. the spoken parts. the BELTS#plus the haunting and unrelenting instrumentation. fantastic song#and naisho no pierced's propose + birthday + gift sort of trilogy of songs. gift especially has been unreal#again the dynamics of soft intimate whispers to belts but also those fuller high notes with edges of growlyness.#plus the songs just generally rock. and those LYRICS. absolutely intense like physically painful and frightening like#yearning and codependency and possession. and the tuning and production just amps it up more#OH and slave.v.v.r has been doing crazy things for even longer but i only started getting into his stuff recently and holy shit#love eater is like. the scariest vocaloid song ive ever heard not because of the lyrics. but because of the tuning#im like. scared. i cant stop listening to it. the heavy synthesized breathy main vocals and whispered harmonies plus the VOCAL FRY#i didnt realized vocaloid5? i think? has a vocal fry option built in i heard? thats crazy#but specifically in love eater the fry and growl is amped up so deep and loud and clear compared to everything else it like#emphasizes the artificiality of the voice while also amping up the expressiveness#its awesome. and on the older slave.v.v.r songs i heard i will hit you 8759632145 times with this piano. also so fucking cool#addicted to that song. 1) its a great jazzy rocky piano tune with this piano flourish at the end of each phrase that sounds fantastic#but also 2) the lyrics are insane. using kanji to write english??????#people are doing wild ass things with vocal synths rn you guys#this isnt even getting into some of the really unique synths themselves too. adachi rei is awesome i love that shes just like#the perfect inbetween of sample based and reconstruction based vocals. shes a sample based synth#but her samples were drawn by hand LOL shes like dectalks granddaughter to me.....#a really good use of adachi rei is iyowa's heat abnormal/heat anomaly/whatever its called ITS AWESOME thats what it is hjrkfdgfd#i think the fact that vocal synths can be so realistic and clean and noiseless out the gate now has made people really stop worrying#about like. realism all together and looking more into expressiveness. omg vocal synth modernist movement
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Third years playing monster seeking monster
Leona as the vengeful ghost
So basically when the vengeful ghost asks someone out and is rejected, the person who rejected them loses a heart bcuz. The ghost is vengeful.
So Leona as vengeful ghost. Every night he idk leads sm1 one but then he selects to ask out malleus. Why? Because malleus won't select Leona to ask out, and so every night malleus loses a heart so malleus can't win. Leona can't either but he literally doesn't care, and he thinks this is funny as hell, because frankly it is.
#the only way this can go wrong is if Malleus is the two faced creep ABSHSBSBS#(the two faced creep gains an extra heart every time they reject someone. so it neutralizes the vengeful ghost)#unrelated but imagine if ur the monster hunter (has to go on a date w/ a specific monster to get an extra point) and youre hunting the#serial killer (after two dates with the serial killer they take two of your hearts) THATS SO FUNNY BECAUSE IT WOULD BE SO UNFORTUNATE 😭😭😭#uhhhhgggrnnn#i could majntag this#sure whatever#malleus draconia#leona kingscholar#twst#twisted wonderland#twst hcs#kirexas twst
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