#that's one way to lose a finger
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Yo
I'm gonna not post anything for linktober today or probably tomorrow bc I'm waiting on the right equipment- all my shiny things are dull and I also need new safety gloves- and the last time I cut myself cutting glass it got infected so. I want proper equipment before I continue :) I'll catch up probably! Or just skip a day or two, but the plan is to catch up. I'm having a lot of fun with this and appreciate all the support :P
#safety first#personal#yall are way too nice to me lol#:')#most of the stuff I make is at the risk of losing a finger or damaging my lungs lol#so I play it safe and I'll wait till the stuff I ordered arrives to catch up :)#I'm going to a concert tonight tho! it's like. my first one. and I'm autistic and get overwhelmed easily#but I have noise cancelling headphones and a good attitude so hopefully it'll be fun#and I know some of yall know I have a service dog for medical stuff- don't worry I've been training him with HIS noise cancelling headphones#we'll be matching lol#I hope this made sense#anyways. me and my dog are going safely to a concert and I'll see yall soon#linktober
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soft!merthur obsessed with each other and being completely, glaringly obvious about it. walking close enough for their fingers to be constantly brushing, talking with their other hand and refusing to break the touch. standing next to each other in a group, slowly shifting closer and closer until they’re pressed up against each other. despite there being other people, whenever they speak the other just has to respond leading them to turn to one another and have their own back and forth, their heads tilting closer and closer until their noses are just inches apart. merlin pretending to find issues with arthur’s clothes to fix that aren’t actually there just to touch him but arthur’s not gonna comment on that bc it means he gets to feel merlin’s touch. gazing at each other across the room, across the training field, across camp, etc and just watching them exist with the softest gaze and a small, tender smile. when the other feels their gaze they look up at them first and meet their eyes unflinchingly. them staring at each other for a moment before they resume what they should be doing (albeit slightly flustered). arthur finding any excuse to keep merlin in his chambers just a little while longer when he should be retiring for bed
#the way this is literally just canon merthur 💀#they ARE that annoying couple that can’t have a singular conversation without mentioning the other#my man my man my man#gwaine is hanging on by a thread and constantly complains to the other knights how they should just#grab each other by the face and smush their lips together#leon defends them and says he thinks its sweet and romantic#elyan agrees but if he has to watch the two make out with their eyes when hes standing right there after asking a simple question#hes gonna lose it#bbc merlin#merlin emrys#arthur pendragon#merthur#fanfic#fanfiction#fic idea#hc#head canon#headcanon#soft merthur will be the death of me#they absolutely tease and mock one another bc thats just how they flirt#but when they get all soft and their insults are said with such a gentle voice#oooooooohhhhh im melting#when arthur does something particularly stupid and merlin just laughs and murmurs ‘dollophead…’ with a smile???#arthur is no longer on planet earth. leave a message#arthur winning a sparring match/tournament and immediately running up to merlin and going ‘i won! did you see??’ like an excitable puppy???#merlin cant feel his fingers or toes
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Ryoshu and Rodya friendship where they sometimes sleep in each other's room when it gets too much in theirs.
When the candlelight in Ryoshu's gets too bright and suffocating with the heat and reminds her too much of the fire her daughter died in sometimes she knocks (more of. just letting herself in lmao) on Rodya's door to literally cool off.
Sometimes when Rodya's room freezes her down to the bone to the point where that she can't sleep, and the stench and sight of her dead neighbors haunts her every senses, Ryoshu gets a quiet knock on her door, and an even more surprising, a solemnly quiet Rodya outside, asking her if she can take a quick snooze here because she doesn't wanna go out and do the night watch.
Something something the only bed worth sleeping is the one right next to you (sad). Fire and ice duo. you get me riht
#ryoshu#rodion#limbus company#assorted outisms#haven't taken a look at the lore so i have no idea if they've disproven it yet but i think (?) that their rooms bend to their mindsets#and at their worsts looks like their base egos#like the ishmael's room is always fucking waterlogged joke. heathcliff sleeps on the moor lmao#canto 9 is a long way to go so. we don't really know what ryoshu's deal is besides the what we've seen but if we're going with her source#then she definitely had a kid. idk man. tortured artist that got her daughter killed because of her art commission that the mafia (whicheve#one of the fingers or might be several of 'em) commissioned#and though rodya does mention something to sonya along the lines of 'not worthy to feel warmth' because she still feels deep guilt from#getting everyone in her backstreet disctrict killed by the middle she wouldn't want to look like she's losing sleep over it in front of the#other sinners. and that compared to hers ryoshu's room is pretty damn toasty so why not take the chance#oh hey rodya and ryoshu both have a relation to the fingers. idk where im going with this. forgive my tag rambling#anyways ryoshu and rodion sleeping together. can be either platonic something romantic or a secret third thing. the world is your oyster#i really should go back to writing my [REDACTED] fic i haven't gotten anywhere with it
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This is going to sound like the world's most brain-rotted thought but passerine by the oh hellos is martlet coded and canary in a coal mine by the crane wives is clover coded
#I KNOW I SOUND LIKE IM LOSING IT BUT HEAR ME OUT#i do not have nearly enough experience to fully unpack the christian context behind passerine BUT#i know for a fact that its about losing your faith in something after seeing the harm done in its name#specifically that one line My palms and fingers still reek of gasoline/From throwing fuel to the fire of that greco-roman dream#look. idk. something something martlet losing faith in the justice from the royal guards#and the guilt after basically marching clover to their own death#all the hopes of the underground lie on the shoulders of a bunch of human children and its the job of the royal guard to fucking kill them#AND CANARY IN A COAL MINE + CLOVER IS SOOOOOOOOO#THE QUESTION OF WHETHER YOUR WORTH SHOULD BE MEASURED WITH THE THINGS YOUVE GIVEN WAY INSTEAD OF WHAT YOU HAVE AND ARE#WOULD CLOVER BE AS IMPORTANT IF IT WERENT FOR THEIR SOUL??? WOULD THEY FORGIVE THEMSELF IF THEY CHOSE TO KEEP THEIR SOUL?????#WOULD A CANARY STILL BE LOVED AFTER IT STOPPED SINGING?????????#also because the When You Break The Surface Without Me line hurts like a bitch#god i havent been so unwell about characters since double life came out this is insane#fuck it yknow what im maintagging this#undertale yellow#clover undertale yellow#martlet undertale yellow#fweeet#if i have to deal with these thoughts in my head so do all of you
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good morning. thinking again of juve and her dog
#oreste garifalle save me. save me oreste garifalle (he cannot even save himself)#i just.. man its so over. by the time they encounter each other juve is the worst shes ever been & oreste doesnt yet know he could be better#so. sure. juve needs to gather the pieces of herself back up and double down on her coping mechanisms but not thinking at all about whats#happened to her/how she was affected by it and by instead fixating on someone elses problems. she needs to offer drive and direction to#another in order to feel more in control of herself#and luckily for her unluckily for himself. by the time she finds him. oreste is only Just stumbling out of a gothic pseudoincest nightmare#in which all of his own wants and desires have been very deliberately placed on a shelf higher than he can reach and hes all too eager#to accidentally replicate previous dynamics (dog) with someone new#so. tldr. juve needs to control/'fix' someone and oreste as of yet only knows how to be controlled/molded in anothers image#which would already be so bad except to top it off. juve is steadily fucking losing it. due to the repression crimes#and even as she tries to distance herself from the emotional aftermath of what she went through. it bleeds into the way she treats oreste#instead. like.#her base level dehumanization of him would already be bad but. as is. in the way it finds her.#juve completely lacks the finesse or grace or awareness to approach it as she normally would#so she instead traps them both in this horrible codependent situation where her 'fixing' oreste mostly involves her going oh! i know!#your problem is that youre not in touch with your anger right? you should be angry about what those guys did to you but youre not rigjt??#so!! easy fix!! lets just get you angry!!!#<- girl who is not entirely wrong but has also never processed any of her own anger a day in her life and Will be projecting#<- girl who will treat you both as a metaphor/extension of herself but Also as a recreation of the previous dynamic she was in with an#excessively angry individual#<- girl who decides the best way to put you in touch with your anger again is by. repeatedly triggering you until you protest#essentially bending your finger back and waiting to see which will come first. you letting it break or begging her to stop#and oreste is always too deeply traumatized and overwhelmed to do anything but let it break. so.#notnow#juve mizani#oreste garifalle#one of my favorite scenes i have planned for them is her making oreste relay what his abuser (kai) looked like. in detail.#as a skinshifter herself.#you see where this is going.#you should send me asks about them btw. if you want. also if you dont
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Living in a quiet little state of denial lest the horrors creep in and make me have to curl up in a ball for 12 hours a day
#ai is officially killing my industry and my disabled ass can do very little else#i keep thinking about all the beautiful fics i want to write while also acknowledging that if the only other thing i'm great at is writing#then i need to go back to monetizing it in a way that is incredibly difficult for me to do right now#i don't want to lose my opportunity to write the worlds that exist in my head but here we are#i am trying to stick my fingers in about 8 different pies right now in hopes that i can have enough to live on one day soon#but boy i am half frantic#my ramblings
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I think you might find the mother-daughter sexual abuse angle in Black Swan of interest if you haven't already delved into that
yesss
I was really taken aback by their relationship when I first watched the film because the incestuous subtext was pretty blatant and I hadn't seen any discussion around it beforehand. The idea of the abusive mother is still pretty hard to register for certain people, so when you add sexual abuse into the mix, plus inflicted on another woman, it mostly disappears from analysis.
#asks#it made me absolutely crazy when I watched it at the time cause NO ONE was talking about it and I felt like I was just making connections#which weren't there#but so many things hint towards this interpretation and tbh it's not that surprising that it's an overlooked subject.#it's very often reduced as mommy issues as many relationships in other medias are without looking much further#(Sharp Objects for instance. like... how can you read the book and not see that. anyways)#Some of the interractions they have can be read this way (like the scene where Nina licks Erica's finger or 'are you ready for me?')#But the one where it truly clicked for me was when they showed Nina's room opened right after she wakes up from her night with 'Lily'#plus the 'Sweet Girl' during the sex scene#Tbh I can't really say if anything really happened between the two at this moment. but it's extremely telling to end the scene this way#The interpretation that Lily in this moment is a projection to think of somebody else while it's Erica who's truly there is plausible#However I don't know if Aronofsky thought of it that way. I think it was supposed to be read as an hallucination through and through and#given the incestuous undertones established earlier in the film it was more to be seen as a psychosexual/Freudian dynamic#But idk. Erica still violates Nina's boundaries repetively and says things concerning how attrative and sexually desirable she is#which are beyond the simple dominating role most people associate to her#SO YEAH ! I spent quite some time thinking about this relationship last year since I thought I was losing my mind at first#might have to rewatch Black Swan now...#black swan#my thoughts
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transformers one 2nd trailer is out I have so much to say but like so much to digest rn im gonna pass out IM SO EXCITED FOR THIS MOVIE BROOOOOOO
#transformers one#sorry for anyone who has to deal with me up until september 20th#tf one trailer#OH MY GODFDDDDDDDD#tf one#maccaddam#maccaddams#transformers#rex rambles#THE FUCKING#ARACHNID AND ELITA FIGHT#AND THE WAVES#AND STARSCREAM#AND THE GORGEOUS ANIMATION#I dont think this movie is gonna end on a positive note im so fucking ready#THE FINGER JOKE AND THEN D-16 PUNCHING ORION OUTTA THE WAY IM LOSING IT#i really hope the humor is good but not overdone
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/breathes. This icon is called killme003.png for the sake of this post because honestly, where yesterday I was rather demotivated from writing up more meta, I woke up today with the strength of all Aeons in existence (and... not-so-in-existence-anymore) for intense research. So I put my thoughts through the sternest 'let's try to shake and shoot up the perspective/logic/theory' process that I could manage, and it's still standing. If anything, I'm more certain than I was yesterday or a week ago, that MHY is doing something substantial, and vastly nuanced with this damned character. I thought I had big-brain thoughts on/for Guizhong, but I don't know if those hold a candle to the ones I have for Kafka (actually, they really do). My issue with this lady in wine though, I don't know where to start writing it all down. It's like 10 messy whiteboards that are hypotheses on her trailer, the words she uses therein, "Don't be afraid, listen to me, wasn't it you, who invited me?", "Destiny has thousands of faces, why does it choose to wear this one?", "Stealing a glance?" during someone's final moments during her spirit whisper? Like, come on, you can't tell me she doesn't play into fate somehow beyond what we've all obviously gathered. You can't tell me that there isn't a more authentic face that has been staring right at us this entire time. She borderline if not directly says it right to us, but we're almost taught to not listen anymore, to think that there's more to something, but what if writers are using that against us, what if this is an instance where we should take words at direct face value? On top of everything else, of course. Fate is "inevitable" and right in front of us always, after all.
God, imagine a being tied so intricately woven into fate (vastly differently from Elio, mind you), speaking quotes upon quotes about the inevitability of fate, and being tied to nihilism, and yet firmly holding some sort of faith into choice, and hounds us on it. I mean come on, one of the main quotes in the entire story of HSR are her words: "When you have the chance to make a choice, make one that you know you won't regret." And she directly tells us in her own SQ, and it is a confirmed truth and not a lie, that Kafka herself does not believe destiny to be predetermined. Now to what capacity? We don't know. But the contrast of this, the rich nuance in this drives me insane. The duality of this woman, the spider (which itself is already a duality of a creature) and the butterfly (not necessarily as juxtaposed as one would believe, it all depends on perspective), the curiosity/fascination opposite her boredom, the ease of her killing which is reinforced with the emotional distance of her submachine guns, and yet she speaks how we should "let morality be our (your) guide", which fits perfectly alongside the decision of having her wield a katana, a blade that was worn by those following the highest code of honor? Speaking of emotional distance, the way she speaks of humans and humanity feels so distant, along with her talk of fragility. God, I just, want to shake HVY very firmly and fiercely. The fact that her eyes are highly likely to be concealed (hello, red), the fact that her voice is altered consistently, and yet we're shown the depth and warmth of her actual voice, and the empathy it holds consistently around primarily one person (almost two).
I love writing meta, but I don't know where to begin. I don't know where to start, but I'll get there. I just wanted to show how messy my mind is, I suppose. It makes perfect sense in my head, I've seen the dots, I've connected them, I see you MiHoYo, and you're giving me everything my brain needs in terms of latching my claws into something. But my god, where do I start writing it all down.
#[ ooc. ] don't try to make it logical or edit your soul according to the fashion. rather; follow your most intense obsessions mercilessly.#[ /rests my fingers to my temples and applies pressure as if it'll give me all the answers. ]#[ i will get there. i wanted a challenge and i already knew i'd found one when i picked her up last year. but my god. ]#[ aeons give me strength to put all the stuff that's incredibly sensical and logical in my head-- to paper without it being nonsensical. ]#[ or appearing as such. ]#[ /wallows. ]#[ i should honestly have an early night and get up earlier-- i'll be gone throughout the afternoon so it'd be nice to have time... ]#[ in the morning. ]#[ or at least i believe it'll be in the afternoon. i'm gonna go sneak downstairs to check. ]#[ but hi welcome to another episode of sae losing her mind. ]#[ i'm getting one step closer to that looney bin every day. ]#[ meta. ] the mara's tether is firmly in her grasp. she will not pull upon it before the designated time; nor shall she relinquish it.#[ can i even tag it with this? no. but i'll do it any way for... reference i suppose. ]#[ any way-- GOODNIGHT LADIES AND GENTS. ]
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i do think there's probably something suspicious about the way everyone loves Ca$h and Quinni and their depth while essentially reducing Darren to their shared supporting character and/or the sassy black woman(/person in this case) stereotype, but I feel somewhat hypocritical bringing it up
#shimmer's thoughts#heartbreak high#darren rivers#cash piggott#ca$h piggott#quinni gallagher jones#tbf i'm mainly a meta writer and i feel like they mentioned darren's issues so clearly in s1 that there's not much for me to say#but most people aren't meta writers. and/or people who know the show better might be able to find things to talk about#it could also be more of a problem with the show itself bc from what i can remember they don't get much else to do#like. it feels like the white characters they support just have more depth and more going on than them#and ik people have talked about the show being weird about missy and malakai#although if we're going to talk about how missy and malakai are mistreated by the show#why is no attention given to the fact that darren's like 90% a stereotype#and 9% is them being desperate enough to change integral parts of themself for a white boy#and 1% is them explaining the stereotype with parent issues where the white dad is focused on and the black mom just disappears#that's still suspicious#also i feel like everyone jumps to hate on them every time they get the chance#without looking at why they do things. but then again the show doesn't really explain their reasoning ever does it#either way i feel like i either see people stereotyping them or shitting on them and no one in between acting regular about things#like i just went into the tags to make sure i'm not losing it and there's like 3 posts cutting them slack for the s1 ca$h storyline#and that's it. everything else focuses on ca$h or quinni or hates on them or stereotypes them. i just think that's a bit odd#idk. i can't put my finger on it but something's not right. i don't trust it#i mean i kinda did put my finger on it. i kinda slapped it repeatedly with my finger. but i still don't see a coherent enough thread here#to be personally satisfied. if i can't write a summary of my thoughts my thoughts aren't clear enough
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Henry VI Part 3 III.ii name a better wooing scene you can't
#you can name richard iii i.ii but that's not a BETTER that's an EQUAL#ok maybe it's 0.2% superior#'to tell thee plain i aim to lie with thee'/'to tell you plain i had rather lie in prison' AAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!#I LOSE MY MIND EVERY TIME I START BITING MY FINGERS#literally what is more dramatic than you go to a king bc your husband was slain in his war and you beg for his lands to be restored#and the king is like hahaha sleep with me and youre like excuse me >:(#and youre just SO fucking beautiful and alluring that the king PROPOSES TO YOU ON THE SPOT#FUCK OFFFF!!!!!!!!!#ALL HER PERFECTIONS CHALLENGE SOVEREIGNTY BRO!!!!!!! ONE WAY OR OTHER SHE IS FOR A KING!!!!!!!!!!#text post#shakespeare#henry vi part 3#3 henry vi#iii henry vi#edward iv#elizabeth woodville
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After being informed I'll be extra busy during my evening shifts this week, I indulged myself and re-read my RP replies for my Lockdown interpretation and 💚
Have some of my fav snippets! I love writing him a bit goofy and knowledgable about Earth stuff all the fault of Prowl
#windy squeals#marauder lockdown#it helps that this lockdown is dealing with the grief of losing prowl as a partner and so#softened quite a bit and is more open to show this side to the ones he trust#and is my way to give a middle finger to everyone that cant portrait him in other ways thats not just the canon violent assassing machine#that he is still on the business but hey#even tigers like to just sunbath and get belly rubs pfff#excuse my writting here btw: NOTHING WAS PROOFREAD and writen on the go#still im amazed i managed this quality of wordings because... english is not my first language hahaha#transformers lockdown#implied#swinlock#&#lockprowl
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auhfhrhfhhgh having an idea but Knowing the character would never ever do it.
#Audhbdhfhfh i said as a joke they should make ace/san happen by like. ace slapping his ass or something#buenos dias mandy style. im realising that may err on too rude#but if i rationalise it with Its just a friendly tap then the tension lessens...#other way i see it happening is ace comes up behind him and whispers in his ear. camera close up and focuses a lil too long#zoom out. sanji holds his ear as he turns and watches ace saunter away. luffy bounds up to sanji and starts saying something#sanjis eyes linger a little longer before they move on. nothing is ever brought up ever again#<- this is how i imagine a world in which the live action even HINTS at ace//san#OURGHHH OR. WORSE. they keep their intro with ace lighting the cigarette#but instead of at a distance he comes up and lights it with his finger getting in sanjis space#short shot of sanjis face snapping up to his in shock#cut to ace clicking his tongue and winking. finger guns#walks away. end of moment its barely there#BAUYGGHRRGHHH DOUBLE LOSE SITUATION... every moment is immediately followed by a shot of zoro staring silently#or fucking. rolling his eyes#making it clear that one theyre baiting us with both ships while neither will happen.
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Went skimming thru late trimax For Reasons, got caught up reading the Legato fight, realized things about the fight that I never had before & went WOW, I kind of want to write an analysis post right now!
Felt the same kind of insanity grip me, however momentarily, that fueled all my analysis posts however many months ago. Too tired to actually word things coherently right now, but...
I May or may not have a full(ish?) analysis of the Legato & Vash fight a la style of This post analyzing the Trigun: Multiple Bullets fight that got unexpectedly kind of popular. People seemed to really appreciate that one, & I even had some ppl saying it could be cool if I did that for others?
So. Legato fight. Maybe. Feel free to remind me later if u see no mention of it again for over a week lol
#speculation nation#ive been wanting to go back into reading the manga again#ive only slowly (VERY slowly) been puttering along with where i am in my fic#for research purposes with the fic.#i do want to go back through the manga bc i STILL havent done a full reread of it#ive just reread so many different parts of it for assorted research that im probably getting to some 10 or so reads total lmao#i wanna reread it in full tho front to back to sort out any stray details and remember any timeline things i might have slightly skewed.#the problem with reading the manga though. is that every fucking time i look at it. i am consumed by a drive to research EVERY little thing#so me reading turns into 'hm thats interesting. that reminds me of this thing that i know happens in volume 8. let me just check that now--'#and i end up so dreadfully distracted every damn time. bc i end up with all my wires crossed and my attention pointing a million ways#it's exhausting. and so i havent been reading the manga outside of random research dives.#im very good at that. i know every volume of the manga and can find Anything within 1 or 2 mins (at the Most)#which is also kind of the problem lol. fingers in too many pies. so many things to think about.#if i get back into Actually rereading the manga tho you can bet ur ASS ill find more things to make posts about#every time i open up the manga i find new things that i could analyze.#i just havent. bc i dont have time. but. ykno what. maybe i Could get back into it...#remind me later. this is one of my favorite fucking fights with my favorite Fucking panels#and i realized smth about the shit Vash is doing that was making me lose my MINDDDD#later tho. ive been sleep deprived today. and it is time for me to rest.#& yea yea ITNL is still the main focus. but idk i have such a mind for details and i remember So many things about the manga#i wanna show that off to people again. and thus. Analyses!!! :D#later. goodnight for now
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Thinking about my hc where lionel ends up losing one of his legs a couple years post-movie. Idk what kind of accident??? but he probably got his leg mangled in some way and had to get it amputated. Lionel later recalls this event as a "funny story", Susan always moans how it was NOT a funny story.
#I also like to imagine he might've lost a finger on one hand way before this.#idk why i have this hc either i think it'd just be neat#also imagine lionel popping the prosthetic off right in front of Adelina and she wasn't informed about him losing the leg#I feel like no one notes Lionel's useage of puns in the movie. he's a silly guy at heart me thinks#well. two uses of puns. but still#god damn it's 1am#missing link 2019#missing link laika#vivianrambles
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Bitches be fighting (it’s the head children 😘☺️)
#just pav things#We love it when they start yelling at each other 😌#Though there’s only really a select few that yell in this sort of accusatory way and point fingers and I’m thinking of Idyllia!#I did another take on the end of arc 2. Or maybe it’s a continuation of the existing developments#I don’t think she would take very kindly to the two boys having their mini-argument right in front of her (who would?)#And she would ESPECIALLY not take kindly to Dism calling Inigo a. y’know. murderer ✨🌈#I think she has some inner empathy towards Inigo even if she doesn’t say it yet (they both know they share similar feelings towards Archie)#They both feel like they failed Archie and wear that on their shoulders (albeit in complementary ways)#Of course this is Arc 2 and they’re still offput by each other. it’s uncomfortable to look at someone else and see yourself.#So she would slap Dism for his callousness :))) and then berate them both for their self-absorbed nature#Very in line with how she yells at Archie in Arc 3 for much the same thing :3#She perceives it as cowardice in both situations ✨ Dism being unable to admit he made a mistake and Archie unable to get over himself#and finally reunite with his brother instead of stringing things along#She gets angry because she dislikes that quality in herself :3#Anyways it’s fun to see how the head children react when they’re upset ❤️#Dism loses all tact and will say anything that comes to his mind. Very snide in his wording.#He loses his inhibitions and lets his shadow side come out to say what he ‘really’ thinks about others#Inigo who delicately holds himself together 24/7 struggles under duress and becomes irrational and hysterical#Jumps to conclusions WAY too quickly#Archie who hates himself more than anything is able to bear pain without lashing out#He directs his pain inward. He was never one for fighting.#Cynthia becomes very quiet and teary and unsure of herself. A stark contrast to her normal demeanour ✨#And as for Archie’s kids. Theon becomes very aggressive and physical (violence is the answer >:3)#Luna would just burst into tears if you made her upset :(#And Ewan takes half of Dism’s approach and half of Theon’s#Which honestly explains why he gets into so many scrapes. 0 conflict resolution skills ✨✨✨✨
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