#that's how long it's been dude
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Going to keep an eye on things while on a newly prescribed medicine for my heart, but occasionally I've been feeling like crying from joy/relief. I didn't know it was possible to live with little to zero chest pain and other issues on a daily basis.
I started feeling its improvements on day 2, and then all day yesterday has been like a literal weight off my chest. Slept a bit for the night, woke up around 4am and I'm just... Breathing so comfortably. I feel relaxed. That feeling of pressure in my chest is hardly there anymore.
This cardiologist said I'd notice changes after just a day or two if it helps. And it's happening!!
Guess it's very much confirming I've had pericarditis for who-knows-how-long. Could've been overlooked since having my cardiac ablation in 2019. Been so freaking rough living with this stuff. All my symptoms were assumed to be part of my WPW Syndrome ('cause the ablation didn't get all of the accessory pathways.) This sort of inflammation can be caused by heart procedures though. -sigh- Why didn't anyone watch out for that or suspect it earlier?
I'll be having a new echo done in a month or two (forgot which appointment date it is among other tests coming up). Crossing my fingers I don't have the pericardia effusion there anymore too if the pericarditis is getting tackled by this new med! 🤞
#for some reason no one could confirm the pericarditis part with all these test and checkups I've done since-#-the WPW diagnosis and emergency procedure in my 2019 hospital stay#everyone assumed my symptoms were from WPW syndrome and that this random bit of fluid around my heart sac was just idiopathic#but this cardiologist I went to on Tuesday questioned me on a few things and got VERY suspicious about my condition#so she took a huuuuge guess of confidence in letting me try a safe dose of some med for pericarditis and other heart diseases#I let myself test that theory too... 'Cause something about my symptoms haven't felt all the fault of my WPW#it's been frustrating for so long man#if this relief and recovery keeps up I might actually get to feel safe exercising again and keeping my heart healthy without pain#I NEED to do physical activity and cardio especially with all the heart diseases that run in the family#but also I genuinely like exercise and wanna do strength training... I've felt so empty and dead inside without my fitness lifestyle I had-#-before my heart problems got so bad at the end of high school#that's how long it's been dude#that in itself is a long story uuughhh#wk speaks#feelings#personal#medicine#physical health#cardiology
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Just disappear.
#this event dude#confirmed transfem mizuki but was it worth it?#alot of people started pumping out art for this like it was nothing bro#sorry it took so long guys here’s mizuki#I love her so this event broke my heart#as a trans masc I actually have been outed multiple times and it’s terifying because you never know how people will react#I’ve gotten a few dirty looks because of it too#also broke my heart because of the normal girl line like OMMGGG#MIZUKI YOU ARE A NORMAL GIRL I SWEAR#pjsk mizuki#niigo#niigo mizuki#mizu5#akiyama mizuki#mizuki pjsk#mizuki akiyama#n25 mizuki#n25#nightcord at 25:00#25 ji nightcord de#project sekai#mizu5 spoilers#my art#art#fanart#artists on tumblr#nightcord mizuki#prsk#prsk art#prsk mizuki
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Happy tdov to fat trans people. 🏳️⚧️ Biggest thing that helped me as a trans kid was seeing older fat trans people. There were a lot of really irritating "advice" posts going around early in my time on the internet with a lot of misinformation in them, but one that I constantly saw (in addition to people claiming you should wear your pants rediculously low or only wear button ups) were posts saying you had to lose weight to transition. Can confidently confirm that is completely untrue. 👍
#seal.txt#tdov#that 'sky and mike' image of the two old trans dudes hugging was one that I had saved to my phone as a trans teen#and i would look at it sometimes and just wonder how they had made it#idk its just nice knowing we live that long and its not a requirement to be skinnyin order to be respected and loved and get old#some of the old 'advice' posts i saw were really completely bizarre and a lot of them stick with me to this day in insecurities#this would have been 2016 ish tumblr so i know not that long ago but i would have been around 13 for reference#weird that i remember so many of the things i read back then. i could probably fill a post with things i was misinformed on due to Tumblr#specifically tumblrs run by people that i didnt really have the knowledge or awareness to understand probably didnt have my best interests#like 'trans rights ' blogs i would follow and not notice until much later were quite the opposite#this is the consequence of viewing social media before i knew all the secret codewords and my brain was much less developed than it is now
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Magneto and Charles Xavier for X Magazine
#xmen#x men#x men 97#magneto#charles xavier#cherik#professor x#erik lehnsherr#marvel#x men fanart#my art#illust#fanart#i love being an artist bc i can think 'hmmm what if magneto was on the cover of gq' and then just. do it#graphic design quite obviously inspired by the current gq cover style#dude idek how i've been finishing so much art recently but long may it continue#and now i have a week off work for xmas so even more time to draw yippeee
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part 1 (on VA and being better than humans)
part 2 (on welt and being just a human)
#remember how in second eruption welt keeps getting covered in blood edgelord style whenever he fights??? yeah#wait first off#hi3#honkai impact 3rd#welt yang#void archives#voidwelt#my doodles#okay anyways. VA isnt human but they haven't been in a “human” body for very long so i reckon there's a lot of new experiences to make#and. i dont think he gets to be dignified enough NOT to be whiny about it. cmon. itd be so funny#second of all sure welt is human but that dude's real used to not giving a shit abt how he's doing and acting like a robot instead of a per#cuz he's got more “important” shit to do#(that's so fucking real of him man ME TOO BESTIE)#also as i told kai: that last panel is not a look of surprise or horror. i tagged this as voidwelt for a reason#i think we all know what kinda look this is#edit: and why tf would they be fighting sky people? why can they bleed? dont ask me im here to draw gay people covered in blood#edit 2: oh my god i didnt add the blood in the first panel. THATS WHAT THE JOKE REVOLVES AROUND???
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My gift for @thereal-true-ogilvie! Hope you like it!
@jrwi-art-exchange
#jrwi#jrwi fanart#jrwi gillion#jrwi jay#jrwi chip#jrwi show#jrwi podcast#jrwi riptide#i cant remember the ship the ship name for the three of them sadly#gart#the comic may have been meant to be a couple more pages long but i didn't really how it ended so this is it#these three mean so much to me#DUDE TUMBLR ABSOLUTELY RUINED THE QUALITY OF IT WHY IS IT SO BLURRY
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prepare!
for context: i pitched an idea to the ava tumblr community about a day where we can just draw chosen happy, eventually it turned into a week!
the only real purpose of chosenweek is to draw chosen happy after all the shit he's been through, thats it! its the week of wholesome chosen art, to put it simply
note you can also include other silly sticks, not just tco! though remember what this week is all about heh
ACK, forgot to mention that you can draw, write.... uh etc. stuff for this event!!
the REAL start of chosenweek will start arounnnd 12am gmt+8 (when it turns october 28 in my time), this post is only for preparation
speaking of, i also made some prompts for the event, some of them were suggested by the community! youre welcome to use this though take note that you dont have to finish all of them and that this list is ENTIRELY OPTIONAL because i know sticktober is still going on
this promptlist was only made for fun, btw so have fun
oh yeah to anyone wondering, if you want to post anything related to this event the tag is just simply #ava chosenweek!
participating in this silly mini event the community thought up is your choice btw!!! not forcing you to join or anything!!
#ava#animator vs animation#alan becker#ava tco#ava the chosen one#ava chosenweek#dude this was queued ever since JULY 20 HOLY SHIT#and the original idea was pitched a day earlier............#this is how you know how long its been planned for oh wow#while ava 11 isnt out and we get even more tco angst we can at least have this for a bit#see you tomorrow! WOW im so excited but also so nervous at the same time#i wonder how many people will actually participate....#lets see!#lilacsart
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Two former military elites taking merc jobs perform absolutely hellish battle tactics together.
#ffxiv#digital art#zenos yae galvus#estinien wyrmblood#adventurer zenos#I will always adore this duo conceptually#because like- socially theyre that aragorn-geralt brooding in a corner of a tavern meme#but in combat they are absolutely terrifying#the azure dragoon and the super soldier legatus are here to fuck up a poachers day#aka zenos is about to crossmap someone's airship cause he knows estinien cant make himself jump that far#why have him try to jump when he can just Olympic-level javelin toss this man#also guys#my dudes#all this time I've been working on adven!zenos being a tank#I... have realized I just write him like a warrior who isnt carrying a weapon- sturdy unkillableness and countering and all#I am only a little bit of a dumbass but orogeny just seems to live in my head rent free#it also gave me the terrifying concept of- after spending time with the scions and after the ultimatum-#of him trying to learn more about dynamis- and zenos being zenos starts learning eventually how to harness it#local calm apathetic man can berserk on command because he's a lot angrier/more expressive inwardly than most people expect#depending on how I look into it- it might be how he fuels most of his shinryu transformations but I'll have to work on it more#but ANYWAYS#I love the thought of these two hunting and working together#and estinien being tossed being turned into a tactic#especially with proper form#this is something ive wanted to draw for a very long time and im very happy I actually have the skill to do so now
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souyo shenanigans. how are akty gonna surpass rad weekend now
#souyo#yu narukami#yosuke hanamura#persona#persona 4#p4#akty#akitoya#cat’s art#project sekai#prsk#vivid bad squad#vbs#aoyagi touya#shinonome akito#i know nothing about p4 i just thought they were funny.#i’m actually a bigger fan of shuake i just dunno how i want to draw them yet#i need to capture akira in all his beauty. and akechi for that matter#finishing p5r dethroned sekai as my main interest. dude it’s been so long since i’ve really gotten into something#like HMMHNGHGHGHGN P5!!!!!! LOVE IT#but now its like. i guess half my followers on twt are stuck with me dabbling in persona for a bit#if i even continue to share it there? idk man i’ve been thinking about it for a while#anyways sorry to ramble in the tags. i’ll fix them later i just needed a place to dump thoughts out
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Call me lover, I'll take you for a drink or two!
Few days ago, I got into Finding Frankie, came out with two things : A new interest and a new f/o.
Some stuff about my Finding Frankie s/i under the Read More ↓↓↓
Her name's Maisy Magnetic!
She's one of cast of Frankie's cartoon, introduced as a side character but slowly becomes part of the main cast as more episodes came out.
Described as humble, creative yet shy. She's a character lovingly inspired by Bob Ross; though instead of painting mighty landscapes, she makes all sorts of things.
Former cartoonist for the newspapers, she became a host of her own little tv show. Where she paints and crafts, showing endless possiblities of creativity.
Her relationship with Henry Hotline developed from friendship to crushing on each other. Maisy's often the one flirted by and gets flustered by Henry.
#🖼️ meera art.png#❤️📞 Call Me Lover! 📋💜#📞 the ringing; it won't stop! 📞#finding frankie henry hotline#henry hotline finding frankie#henry hotline#self ship#self shipping#selfship community#selfshipping community#s/i x f/o#s/i x canon#self insert x canon#selfship art#selfship artist#A self ship that isn't P03 or Folly? Wowee!!#Been wanting to draw something with Henry! It's just making the self insert took a long while#I knowww one of the rejected characters was a etch a sketch but...#...I chose a magnetic drawing board (like the Magna Doodle) mainly because#I don't know much about the etch a sketch and also Magna Doodle were my favourite in my childhood 💜#How can I not choose a childhood favourite?#Also it's 2 AM when I'm posting this dear god dude
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i'm having hyperfixation drought so i did what i did best and created a crossover episode
#trafficblr#life series#hermitcraft#qsmp#the drought's been crazy i had to make qsmp x life series/hermitcraft you don't understand i literally had to#i literally cannot tag all of the cubitos without going over the limit so i'm gonna use them to rant about these doodles instead#when i tell you that i think dl!pearl would've loved tilín i'm telling you i think she would've LOVED them like.#something about just wanting to find love at every turn but feeling unwanted spdihgpisadhfpa. and also tilín's name is similar to tilly LOL#the jelly egg is just like if the double life jelly pandas were just an egg that scar loves with all his heart and grian reluctantly accept#i think out of all the duos in qsmp. the one i would want to see in the dl soumate premise the most is slimeriana. it's the dysfunctionalit#i made a post in the past about pac and tango being my fav cubitos bcs they were both crazy cartoonish and like scientists#but it kinda felt like a disservice to leave mike and zedaph out because to me they're argubly crazier and more cartoonish#missa and tim are paired bcs i just really wanted an excuse to draw the wet cats and it just so happened they both have relations to death#skizz and jaiden as the lawyers who were SHOCKINGLY good at their jobs like they cooked with that one#(was also gonna draw joe and roier as bad lawyers but i was running outta steam)#someone's already made a post about grian and (el) quackity and their eye entities so not much elaboration needed there#fit and etho just give the same vibe to be as a dude who has a reputation and is well-known and seems intimidating#i also made fit's arms way too skinny and i don't like it...but i'm not gonna go back and change it now i spent embarassingly long on this#but then his silliness is brought out by The Narrative#foolish and bdubs is one of my favorite drawings because i just knew i wanted to highlight the silly height difference#just realized they're also both god-like figures at least at some point#cellbit and rendog. cat and dog and lore. enough said about their connection.#i couldn't decide who fit etoiles combat hungry anime protagonist vibe best bcs martyn was originally paired with him#but i wanted martyn with phil so i went with my second options: joel and gem#i couldn't draw them mid rage but essentially the title is derived from “WHO KILLED EMPANADA” and “do me a favor. die for me.”#philza minecraft and martyn inthelittlewood. they feel like twins but one is evil (it's martyn)#SOMETHING I FORGOT THAT I WISH I ADDED: BBH AND BIGB AS THE ENTITIES WHO LIE. I HATE MYSELF HOW COULD I FORGET THAT#if i were to pair impulse with someone it would be tubbo? either him or scar would've been with tubbo#and then lizzie i just did not know who i wanted to pair her with. no one really does it like her in my opinion#scott's someone i also had no idea who to put him with he's just so...him...
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FIIIINALLY almost nailed my designs for lizzie and caspian can i get a HEEEELLL YEAAH???? i think these two make a vvery cute duo and i cannt wait to see them again. i also hope they both get hurt reaaaallly really badly. togeter
#OOOHH OH OOOHH IVE BBBEEEN REWATCHING THINGSSS ive been rewatching riptide weeee im never leaving here weeeee!!!#caspian and lizzie are SUUUUCH A CUTE COUPLE CAN I BE HONNESTT but in a princess and knight way. do you hear me.#caspian is such a 'lights her cigarette' kinda guy. hes such a dude that has made a vow to a very very special lady#he would float half of a boat w nothing but his water powers for eight days and he would do it all for her.I LOVE THEMM#IM SO HAPPY ABT LIZZIES REDESIGN BTW IM MAKIN A WHOLE DOODLY PAGE FOR HER N IM HAVING FUNNN YEAAAHHH#CASPIAN HAS ALSO BEN ENTIRELY RECYCLED IN MY MINDS EYE. they describe him as Wet sooo much. so i drew that and im happy abt it#caspian is sooo handsom in my brain thats why i draw him so rarely bc drawing pretty boys is HARD. but i DID IT.#when he first appeared i thought he was a triton too bc i didn talk to the fandom n i knew nothing abt dnd. so learning otherwise was funny#a residual effect o that mixup is me giving him ears thatre like the fins of a flying fish. he seems to light and carefree.#the lighter fins o a flying fish just fit so perfectly. also his white hair fades into mist in my mind#NOW FOR LIZZIE ART NOTES.A BLACK ROSE.sometimes a red rose.shes so roses to me!!gorgeous but coated in thorns. i wanted her hair to-#-resemble roses or smth like that. square swirls are also soo her. reevaluating her ref sheet was also fun bc WOW the triangles and birds#SO FUN!! shes so spikyy..her and caspian are such a good dynamic in everyway#personality wise and appearance wise and i wanted to capture that sortaaaa. in vibes. yknow.im veryhappy w getting their designs sorted out#ALSO I GAVE LIZZie tha jhonny da homicidal manac boots. bc i love that comic and i will never stop giving characters da boots.#also in other news ddoes anyone else still wonder abt destinys blade and how it used to be a golden lotus sword but then it also used to#be a person and caspian just had that sword for however da fuck long and then so willingly gave it to gillion after he lost his sword#llike did he know. did he know. also do you think caspian and lizzie have explored ea
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let it be known that i love prince inigo with my whole soul. however sometimes it is SO much fun to think about owain and his two most loyal-est knights you ever seen: worst guy in the world #1 and worst guy in the world #2. i love retainer inigo and severa so much. retainers who bully you and make fun of you and trash on you but they’d leave behind everyone and everything they ever knew to follow you and protect you in a whole new universe. they love you so much that they’d swear allegiance to total strangers but that loyalty pales in comparison to what they’d do for you. and they were all lovers!!!!!!!
#ann plays awakening#awakening trio#sometimes i forget owain is literal royalty and like#in the bad timeline hes probably like. the second most important person there?? unless luci has a sibling#obviously she’d need her own retainers but unfortunately i am thimking awakening trio thoughts. i miss. i love them in any form#that they are handed to me#i love them as best friends. as forced circumstance allies to family. as lovers.#i know i said lovers in this post but im not sure they’d ever label it as that#to me its very much ‘its not exactly romantic but its too intense to be platonic’#what i am getting at is queer platonic awakening trio btw. in case that wasnt obvious#like no matter who they are or where they go they are eachothers people dude. like literally do not separate#anyways im gonna be thinking long and hard about who should be everyones parents in this timeline#i have what i call my ‘main’ pairings and thats what i use for most of my headcanons (ex prince inigo)#but i’d like a completely separate one for owain retainer trio#i think im pretty set on fred!severa#i couuuldddd pick fred!inigo which i do think is SUPER compelling as well but something about freddy!severa… also shes so cute as a brunette#like sorry… shes just so beautiful#ive been having a lot of thoughts aboht tharj!inigo and i need to figure out if thats current bias talking or if im cooking with that one#i got no idea who owain’s second parent should be. robin maybe? idk#i mean his second parent isnt quite as impactful in regards to trio dynamics in this case just because he’s always the prince but. idk#i really like the idea of half plegian owain but i ALWAYS run half plegian owain cuz im always pairing lissa with robin or henry so its like#this isnt new 😭😭😭 but god. PLEGIAN OWAIN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!#hm. though. hear me out. manakete owain???????????????? ehhh????#sorry. idk. i love how changing the parents of the second gen can change their characterization. its like my favorite thing ever#i think its why im so attached to all of them. theres always new things to explore with them!!! its so much fun!!!!!!#graaarfggjjjhhhhhhn!!!!
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Quackity: Lately, I have been participating in events and projects, and unfortunately it's become clear to me that my presence and name have only been used to attract the attention of my national and international community with the objective, as I see it, of generating more attention towards controversies - destructive controversies, and a rupture that is very clear in the community. [...] In advance, I ask the organizers of any type of events and projects like this to please show more respect to me and my community, because I've shown lots of sympathy and cooperation in these various projects and events, but it's become clear to me that their only interest is in using my name. My name and my community have been used to attract all this attention for distorted purposes, and I will no longer allow that to happen. That is not what my content is about - not me nor my content nor anything I’ve done.
Here's Quackity's commentary on respect and his reasoning for distancing himself and his projects from future events and awards shows.
[ Full Transcript ↓ ]
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Quackity: Before I leave, I would like to talk about something that is very serious for me and something that I would like to tell you about. Because for me it is a very serious topic and it is a topic that- well, I had my mind on and I want to express it- [reading Chat] yes, thank you. Merry Christmas, Merry Christmas.
Anyways, lately I have been participating in events and projects, and in these events and projects, unfortunately it's become clear to me that my presence and name have only been used to attract the attention of my national and international community with the objective, as I see it, of generating more attention towards controversies - destructive controversies, and a rupture that is very clear in the community, and this is what I want to say: I'm NOT ok with these types of dynamics or stuff like this, and I want to make it very clear to my stream, my community, and everyone that, for this exact reason that I just mentioned, I want to make it clear that I want to distance myself and any of my projects from the Esland Awards, which you all know is coming up.
Sadly, the Esland Awards have been an event with a history of much controversy, a lot of division, and a lot of divisions within the community, and as you guys know, as you know, my content has never been characterized by seeking controversy or divisions or anything like that. It's for this exact reason that I don't want to be involved with these awards.
In advance, I ask the organizers of any type of events and projects like this to please show more respect to me and my community, because I've shown lots of sympathy and cooperation in these various projects and events, but it's become clear to me that their only interest is in using my name. My name and my community have been used to attract all this attention for distorted purposes, and I will no longer allow that to happen. I don't want it to happen. That is not what my content is about - not me nor my content nor anything I've done. That's what I want to make very clear here.
That's about it. I'm going to continue with the projects I'm doing and I want to thank my community so much for the support and love. I appreciate it very much, but I wanted to make this clear - I wanted to make this clear. This is just a topic I wanted to address quickly.
Thank you for all the love and support, I love you all so much.
#Quackity#QSMP#December 23 2023#Translated#I tried my best but as always; if you have any suggestions or corrections please let me know#For context: Quackity and the QSMP have been repeatedly snubbed and undermined but very recently (as in like. the last 48 hours)#the ''Hispanic rewind'' aired and they were VERY rude to Quackity and his project#like straight up in the video itself they were rude about his project (and many other projects). It was basically a Spain-centric video#Then the creator double-downed on it on Twitter and was an all around asshole about it#I don't like sharing ''drama'' here but this is a matter of respect and communities so I think it's important to share#Especially since I know some people will ask ''hey why isn't Quackity / the QSMP nominated at this award show?''#The Esland awards are a whole 'nother can of worms but the dude who did the Rewind is tied to that too#The Eslands have had a lot of problems though so frankly I can't blame him#I wasn't planning on posting this but I wasn't seeing any translations or clips floating around on here#despite the discussions people were having#so here it is for folks if they want / need to reference it#Anyways. Good for Quackity#He never speaks up about this kind of stuff but this was long overdue#k I just updated the wording on this I didn't like how I phrased a few things
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forgive me if you've been asked this before or if its annoying, but how did you learn to use colored pencils like that? your art is so special to me.
ty :) I took an art class for a few years where our teacher had us buy prismacolor pencils as one of the art supplies and had us use them kinda like paints, pressing down hard right away and blending the colors together. its not how youre supposed to use them she was just trying to teach us to use color and ig this was more to the point. I picked them up again years after i stopped going to that class just bc they were there and i wanted to play around w them a bit and ended up actually enjoying it when doing it on my own terms lol
#it was a weird class#it was just this russian lady doing private lessons in her house that my mom learned about somehow#I did NOT like those classes all we did was still life and they were hours long which is esp rough when im in high school and busy#and she wanted us to stand while working the whole time bc tradition i guess?#she did allow me to work sitting but thought i was lazy for it. idk dude i dont want to exhaust myself fast for no reason#standing is a lot more tiring than walking#i def did still benefit from those classes just from learning to accurately draw from life#did not like the teacher tho#on one hand shed paid for the art supplies for kids whos families were too poor to (and these are nice expensive supplies)#which is very nice#but on the other she was very homophobic and open about it#like when they legalized gay marriage she went on a rant about how horrible it is that they can adopt kids now#and also kind of racist#she was telling me how she got blocked from a facebook group bc she made a post asking if she could speak to a white person#and she didnt realize she was posting that publicly she thought it was a private message to the group owner#im honestly still not sure i heard/understood her correctly bc it was so bizzare and the only time i ever remember her being racist#she talked abt it like she genuienly was unaware it was racist#she described it as a misunderstanding bc she accidentally posted it publicly instead of privately#like it wouldnt have been racist to ask that at all#also one time she talked about how she saw demons in her home once#also she doesnt vaccinate her kids bc of microchips#she was like a walking russian stereotype lol#anyway heres some ink the artist lore
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dazai not taking the antidote is giving me so much anxiety
#dude just open and inject. bam.#it's been how long? time is ticking you're going to end up dying before you take it#IT'S NOT THAT HARD.#LOOK WHAT HAPPENED TO FYODOR FOR WANTING TO TAKE IT IN THE HELICOPTER INSTEAD OF THE MOMENT HE GOT IT#LEARN. FROM. RATS. MISTAKE.#i swear they're doing this on purpose#it just feels soooo wrong.#i have a bad bad feeling#bungou stray dogs#dazai osamu#bsd#bsd.txt
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