#that's how I deal with the low points of life
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ellecdc · 15 hours ago
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Hi, I don't actually know if your requests are open but I was just wondering if you could do a fic about poly!Mauraders x reader, but it's a full moon and when James and Sirius are out with moony, they run into another wolf (reader) and moony just instantly takes a liking to her. Imagine moony trying to follow her around, and reader keeps snapping her jaw at him. I could also imagine reader is maybe a Slytherin?
Sorry if this isn't good, I just popped into my head, and I went with it. Take your time, and don't rush yourself 💓
"sorry if this isn't good - don't rush" uhm, it was fantastic and I wrote it IMMEDIATELY thank youuuuu!!!! <3
poly!marauders x werewolf!reader who's unwittingly integrated into their pack [2.3k words]
CW: fem!reader, werewolf behaviour, some aggression/fighting, canine aggression and submission, Padfoot's had it up to fucking here with them all thank you very much
Padfoot wondered for a moment if maybe he was just some glorified herding dog at this point whilst he struggled to keep Moony on their usual routine when the werewolf seemed thoroughly hellbent on breaking it.
Moony - a blood hound tonight, apparently - insisted on following his nose, Padfoot’s incessant demands to stick to plan be damned. 
And unfortunately for Padfoot, it didn’t seem like Prongs or Wormtail had any clue how to deal with Moony either.
Great.
So instead of their usual routine of transforming in the shack, letting Moony out, following their trail where they run (and roll, in Moony & Padfoot’s case) down a large hill before chasing each other along the river bank, grabbing a drink from the edge of the Black Lake and slowly making their way back to the shack…Moony no sooner got to the bottom of their hill before he picked up some scent and followed it down dark, wandering paths through the Forbidden Forest.
Padfoot had tried encouraging a mouth wrestle and romp - no dice. Prongs tried taking off in a sprint, hoping to elicit Moony’s instinct to chase - no dice. Wormtail bit Moony’s foot which only saw him nearly stomped on as the werewolf continued on his journey. Prongs tried bodily shoving Moony back in the direction of the shack to no avail. 
Padfoot was just about ready to pick a bloody fight with the beast when he heard snuffling followed by a low growl.
Unfortunately for Padfoot, Moony didn’t miss it either, and before he knew which way was up, Moony took off in a sprint towards the sound. 
Padfoot hoped to come back in his next life as a border collie - maybe he’d have better luck with the likes of sheep.
And that decision was only solidified when he turned the corner to find Moony staring down another werewolf who had her hackles raised and teeth bared at the bastard who seemed either ignorant to canine body language or was actively choosing to ignore it.
At least sheep will have the bloody wherewithal to avoid danger. 
Padfoot made a quiet whimpering sound, hoping to encourage Moony to get the hells out of here, but it only served to have Moony’s ear flick in his general direction before returning to his new wolf friend. 
Prongs huffed a breath and stomped his hoof into the earth, and Padfoot noticed then that Wormtail was nowhere to be found - the bloody coward. 
Moony tried to crane his neck forward to sniff at the wolf's paws, only for the wolf to snarl and snap at him before smacking him with said paw like a sodding cat. 
Moony at least had the grace to lower himself to the ground in submission for but a moment before he bounced back up to try doing much the same. 
This time, the wolf charged at Moony, pinning him to the earth by his throat as she growled at him; the sound muffled by the fact that Moony’s sodding neck was in her mouth.
Prongs grunted and made to charge in Moony’s defence, causing the wolf to release Moony and look at him sceptically, and Moony to growl at Prongs warningly - he did not want their help. 
Fine by Padfoot. He wasn’t much interested in helping a werewolf with a death wish anyway. 
But when the wolf decided this was all perhaps a bit too much for her, turning away from the strange pack to continue on its path - of which the marauders should be on their own, thank you very much - Moony went to follow, and dammit, this was Padfoot’s pack.
And if it wasn’t his pack, it was his herd, and what kind of border collie would Padfoot be if he let his pack sheep out of his sight?
Not a very good one, is what.
So, with a huff of resignation, Padfoot trailed behind the wolves - one that kept turning to nip, snap, and snarl at pesky Moony, and pesky Moony who kept trying to get a sniff or even, more disturbingly, incite play with a gentle nip - Prongs (and Wormtail, by means of Prongs’ antlers) trailed behind him. 
The wolf seemed resigned to her fate in having company for the rest of the evening, though that didn’t mean she was pleased about it. Every time Padfoot thought the wolf’s hackles were going down, Moony playbowed in front of her like an overgrown lanky puppy, and they rose right back up. 
The new wolf, for her part, spent the evening snuffling through the dried leaves and moss on the floor, stretching against tree trunks and using the bark to sharpen her claws (still not unlike a cat), and chewing on a stick. 
Padfoot thought that actually all seemed like a really nice way to spend the evening.
Or, you know, it would have been, had he not been in charge of this ridiculous rag-tag group of misfits he unwittingly found himself responsible for. 
But eventually, the evening had to come to an end, and that end was signalled by the twitching of Moony’s muscles underneath his fur as the moon started pulling at his bones, and it appeared to be doing the same for you.
But the night couldn’t end, it seemed, if you weren’t coming with Moony. And for as annoyed as Padfoot had been all evening, he was growing increasingly anxious. 
You abandoned your stick and stood, beginning to limp away from them when Moony grunted and hurried after you, causing Padfoot and Prongs to bark and bleat respectively. 
Any levity that the wolf had found for the marauders quickly vanished in the face of her oncoming transformation and the pain radiating through her when she turned on Moony and lunged at him. Padfoot whimpered and felt his heart try to escape through his throat as earth flew up in the air due to paws digging into the ground for traction and scrambling for purchase. 
The wolf's growls were different now, though; they weren’t bored, they weren’t dismissive, and they weren’t even all that threatening. The wolf was scared - panicked, even. Padfoot could see it in the speed of her breathing and the whites of her eyes that she was quickly descending into terror. 
They were close, so close, to the shack; Padfoot was certain he could get Moony back before the transformation if he would just get a sodding move on.
But it appeared Moony was wholly unwilling to leave without this wolf, and he wasn’t taking no for an answer. 
The wolf seemed to come to the same conclusion as Padfoot, stepping away from Moony before submitting for the first time all evening, and wincing as Padfoot heard one of her joints shift. 
Moony let out a sigh, moving over to the wolf who seemed so small now that she was cowering at the base of the tree with Moony standing above her, nudging her face and neck with his nose before licking over her face. 
The wolf whimpered, and Padfoot watched as Moony’s right hind foot came out from underneath him for a moment - as if he tripped - telling him that the transformation was starting. 
Padfoot whined, and he swore Moony actually nodded his head in understanding before he gently grabbed the wolf by the scruff of the neck and encouraged her to stand. 
Resigned to her fate, the wolf followed the pack towards the shack, barely making it into the room before the transformation took over.
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The first thing you noticed when you came to wasn’t the pain, though that was there. It was always there. 
No, the first thing you noticed when you came to was the feeling of linen on top of you and something soft below you. 
That wasn’t right; that couldn’t be right, could it? You were supposed to be in the cave. 
But when you shifted your arm and felt the linen - a blanket? - fall from your shoulder, you knew it was true. You were not in the cave. You were not in the cave, and someone had found you. 
“I think she’s awake.” 
Someones had found you.
You were not in the cave, people had found you, and you were not alone.
You sat up suddenly, holding the blanket to your chest as you shuffled away from the sounds before your back met something solid. Your head felt heavy and off-kilter, like you were standing on a boat swaying on rolling waves.
You had a wicked migraine coming on.
“Whoa, whoa. Easy there doll.” Another voice sounded.
“What-” You tried, cutting yourself off to clear your throat when your voice came out gravely and painful, threatening to bring up whatever you still had in your stomach from dinner two nights ago; the last time you could manage food. “Why are you- why am I here? Where am I? What-”
“Open your eyes, L/N.” The second voice offered, though you could tell the inflection was softer than it naturally was; you wondered if that took him a lot of effort. “You’re okay.”
Your breaths began to quicken because you didn’t feel okay, this didn’t feel okay. Someone knew, they knew; they had found you, you were found out.
The sun was still low, so the light in the….room? shack? hut? was dim, though it still made your eyes water with the impending migraine lined up in your temples as if just waiting for a good excuse to wreak havoc on your brain. 
You were accosted with the sight of Sirius Black crouching in front of you, elbows on his knees as his eyebrows hooked in the middle; James Potter standing behind him with his arms crossed over his chest as he looked at you much the same. 
“You’re okay.” James repeated, nodding his head encouragingly as your vision began to swim.
“Try to relax, doll; you’re not going to feel very well if you work yourself up.”
You let out a hysterical breath that bordered between a laugh and a sob as a few tears spilled out. “Relax? I- what… How could you- why are you here?”
James grimaced. “Sorry, that would be Moony’s fault.” 
“Moony? I-” But your question was cut off  when you heard the shuffling off bedding from across the room, and both James and Sirius turned towards the sound, exposing Remus Lupin sitting up on an old mattress, rubbing at his eyes as a blanket fell and pooled at his hips, exposing his bare torso that was….covered in claw marks.
“Oh gods.” You let out with a sob. “What did I- Did I do that?” 
“What?” Remus let out groggily as both Sirius and James quickly denied it. 
“No, no. Listen, angel, please relax-”
“Stop telling me to relax.” You nearly shrilled. “And stop calling me nice names!”
Too tired, too freaked out, and too confused to have chosen your wording carefully, you appeared to have said something wrong when Sirius’ mouth turned up in a salacious smirk. 
“You like our nice names?”
“No!” 
“I think you do.” James continued.
“Leave the poor girl alone.” Remus grumbled before he fell back onto his bed, rubbing harshly at his eyes.
“Where are we?” You asked simply, swallowing around your gag reflex.
“The shrieking shack.” James answered just as simply.
“Okay.” You acknowledged. “Why?”
“Well, Moony wouldn’t leave without you, so we sort of had to bring you with us.” Sirius answered.
“Moony…?”
“That’s me.” You heard Remus mutter, voice muffled from behind his hands. 
“And…I didn’t hurt anyone last night?” You asked slowly. 
James’ face softened as he started to shake his head no, but Sirius scoffed.
“Define hurt, gorgeous. I was pissed, for one. Two, you had that wanker by the throat for most of the night.” He said, gesturing behind him to Remus with a careless thumb. 
“Why?”
“He wouldn’t bloody leave you alone! I was exhausted just watching.” Sirius continued.
“Would you stop bloody shouting?” Remus grumbled, and you couldn’t help but agree as you rubbed at your head. 
“Anyway,” James continued at a more appropriate volume, “he wouldn’t leave without you, so we brought you back here for the transformation. Where…where were you going to go for the transformation?” 
You flushed as you wrapped the blanket tighter around your person. “There's…a cave I usually go to.” You admitted in a whisper.
“Well, I bet this is an upgrade then, no?” Sirius offered somewhat haughtily, but his face fell quickly when you began speaking again.
“You can’t tell anyone…please.” 
“Tell anyone?” James repeated.
“I…no one knows, no one can know.”
“Whoa, babe, hang on. Who’re we gonna tell?” Sirius asked then, a disbelieving look painting his features. 
“I-” you started, swallowing again “I don’t know but, I just, you can’t-”
“We weren’t gonna tell anyone.” James assured you. “We aren’t going to tell anyone; there’s nothing to tell.” 
You must have looked sceptical, because Sirius quickly intervened.
“Alright look, we promise not to tell anyone about your lycanthropy, as long as you promise not to tell anyone about Remus’, or about James and I being illegal, unregistered animagi.” 
Your mouth actually fell open as you looked between the three of them; James as he turned to grab some vials of pain potions and healing balms, Sirius who was smirking at you salaciously, and Remus who was carding his hand through his hair and smiling (try grimacing) at you apologetically. 
“Welcome to the pack, L/N.” Remus said wryly before he downed the potion James handed to him in one, effortless swig and laid back down. 
“We’re called the marauders.” James explained as he handed you a matching potion. “We’ll have to find you a nickname. Don’t worry though, we have a whole month to come up with one.” 
What the fuck?
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gguk-n · 1 day ago
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Chapter 1- The Proposal
A+ in Pretend Love (Lando Norris x Reader)
Series Masterlist
Summary- The sponsor's say they'll pull out if Lando doesn't fix his ways. So, Zak stages an intervention. Y/N can't get approved for visa, no matter how hard she tries. Zak offers to help. An honest and mutually beneficial relationship is formed.
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The scene is set. The MTC is almost empty to the wandering eye, but in reality, every one was sat in the huge conference hall Zak had constructed for other reason not pertaining to the one they had gathered for. "So, we're gathered here today" Zak began only to be interrupted by Oscar, "I still don't get why I'm here when this is about Lando." Zak sighed, "This is about me?" Lando asked surprised. Oscar looks at him with a raised eyebrow and then the other people at the table like in the Office. "Oscar, this is a team problem and we must deal with it as a team." Zak spoke while pinching the bridge of his nose. "Now where was I? Before I was rudely interrupted" Zak paused; "The sponsors aren't happy and want to pull away because of Lando's antics" Zak finished. "What? Why me? What about Oscar?" Lando pointed out like a child caught in trouble. "As far as I know, Oscar is extremely sponsor friendly with his long term girlfriend and polite demeanour" Zak said looking pointedly at Lando.
The table erupted in whispers, "What have I do?" Lando piped in. "The partying, the girls, the drinking. Might I continue?" Zak asked. Lando sighed, "So, what do you want me to do? Live like a monk" he asked. "No, we just need to polish up your image, make it more sponsor friendly." Zak said. "I have an idea" someone on the table suggested. "Go on" Zak prompted. "What if we say that Lando's been in a long term healthy relationship and is about to get married?" they suggested. Everyone seemed to hum in agreement. "What no? Ask me first, I'm the one involved. This is nonsense. Ask the sponsors to leave" Lando almost shouted. "Lando, you do know those sponsors are the reason you can drive in Formula One, so that we can make cars for you to race" Zak asked pointedly. Lando's shoulder's slumped, he looked at Oscar for support but he just shrugged at Lando; "Fine" Lando sighed. "So, which model is it?" he asked. "No, we need someone low- key. Out of the public eye to make this believable" someone else piped in. "But which girl will want to agree to that" someone else argued. Lando was currently a by-stander in his own life.
Finally after much deliberation, it was decided that to help Lando clear up his image; he would fake date someone who lived a normal life. And Zak would pay them to keep their mouth shut.
Y/N Y/L/N was in her last semester at University of Monaco of her Master's programme. She been living there since the start of the programme while working as a teaching assistant to gain experience towards her final goal of becoming a Professor. The university was great; culturally diverse and the job paid decently well; in her opinion. Right now, the biggest dilemma she faced was the stupid visa that for some reason wouldn't get renewed no matter how much she tried. She was sat in an almost empty cafe in the street's of Monaco, tucked away from the public. "You must understand. I'll have the job as soon as I graduate. Please extend my visa" she almost begged. "We can't Miss Y/L/N. Those are the rules. You will have to leave the country at the end of your visa" the voice replied sternly. Y/N sighed exasperated while running her hand through her hair for the hundredth time today as the call cut.
Some one else had entered the cafe during this whole ordeal, he walked up to Y/N, "Is this seat taken?" Zak asked. Y/N just nodded without looking up. "I'm sorry for eves dropping but it seems like you're having visa issues?" Zak asked. Y/N looked up, he pushed his business card forward. "I'm Zak Brown, CEO of McLaren" he introduced himself. "Y/N Y/L/N" she shook his hand. "I could help you if you'd like" he suggested. "What do you get in return?" she asked skeptically. "Well, I will have to discuss this with the person who might help you and let you know" he said. "Maybe you can forward me your CV. I can see what I can do" he spoke slowly. Y/N bit her lip before thinking, fuck it. What's the worst that could happen? and forwarded her CV to Zak. "I'll contact you as soon as possible" Zak said smiling while he walked away. "Arrange a meeting in the MTC, I have the woman for the job" Zak called his assistant.
Back at the MTC, when everyone had gathered; "So, I met this girl, around Lando's age. She is in need of help with her visa renewal" Zak said. "If she needs a visa for Monaco, wouldn't she be better off marrying Charles" Oscar interrupted. Zak sighed loudly, "Can you stop interrupting me?" he asked. "Can you stop having me attend meeting that have nothing to do with me?" Oscar retorted. "Touche" Zak relented. "So, we help her with her visa and she helps us with Lando" Zak suggested. Everyone seemed to agree unanimously. Lando was quite the whole time, he felt like he had lost any credibility since they were in trouble with the sponsors because of him. He quietly agreed to the arrangement. "Let's meet up with her. I'll arrange for a meeting. Just the three of us" he told Lando already on the phone with Y/N before Lando could even say anything.
They had decided to meet at a cafe in Monaco. The cafe was quite, with barely any customers in site. When Zak and Lando entered, they found a woman sat at one of the tables placed at the back, nursing a cup of coffee. As soon as she saw Zak, she greeted him with a smile. Lando was looking at her the whole time. Zak cleared his throat, "This is Lando Norris" he introduced Lando to her. She smiled at him, introducing herself and the three sat down when Zak began talking. "So, here's the thing, I need help" She nodded along, "If it's not money related I think I can help" she suggested. "It isn't. I need someone to help with damage control." Zak drawled. "Lando here is a Formula One driver, he drives for my team" Zak explained, watching the confusion on Y/N's face. She nodded along. "The sponsors are creating an issue, all baseless I might add. But I do want to please them and I believe, you would be of great help" Zak said. "How can I help?" she asked. "I would like it if you two would date. Maybe like a fake relationship, just for like a year or so." Zak said quickly. "I don't...this is crazy." she expressed. "I understand this is crazy, but please help me. Being with a millionaire helps" he pleaded. "He's a millionaire" Y/N asked looking at Lando now. "I might not look the part but they pay well" Lando laughed gesturing towards Zak. "This will help, they wouldn't want to cause issues for a public figure." Zak further elaborated. "Like a mutually beneficial relationship" Zak finished. "I need to think about this. All of this is too much for me" she said quickly grabbing her things to leave. Before the two men could stop her she was out of the cafe. "Told you this was a bad idea" Lando said shaking his heading, getting up to leave.
Back home, Y/N was in turmoil. She ended up googling Lando and whatever they said was true. This wasn't some MLM or cult they were trying to indoctrinate her into. And from all the news article, it seemed that Lando had bit of a reputation of partying and sleeping around. She could see why having a girlfriend would help him. She couldn't see why she could help him though. Wouldn't he do better with a model or someone famous?
A few days of her mind being plagued with thoughts of that weird meeting with Lando and Zak; the visa officer called. "Please ma'am you have to understand, I can't do anything. I can't renew your visa" he stressed. Y/N was annoyed, "Please, you can't do this" she cried. "It's out of my control" he expressed. "Please stop calling us" he warned and cut the call. Maybe, desperate times call for desperate measures.
Y/N called up Zak, "Hi, This is Y/N" she spoke slowly. "Hi, Y/N. How are you?" Zak chirped. "I'm good. I'm up for the offer. I'll date...I mean fake date Lando" she stated. "Wonderful. That's what I would've liked to hear" he gloated. "Let's meet at the same place this weekend. And please answer a few questions my assistant will email you before we meet" Zak said before cutting the call. Zak had to make a few more calls like to Lando and his assistant.
Y/N and Lando both received emails asking them questions most couples would know about each other. Y/N wasn't sure if she should fake a personality but decided against it and answered it as truly as possible.
The weekend rolled around rather quickly and the both of them were getting dressed to meet. The cafe seemed empty yet again, a strange occurrence in their eyes. The three of them greeted each other before receiving files from Zak. "These contain information about each other learn it. And this contains how you two met, fell in love and are now happily engaged" Zak said, pulling a velvet box from his pocket. He placed the box in front of Y/N which housed a beautiful ring, "It's fake, so don't worry about losing it" Zak said looking at the pair. "I think this will turn out great. Now, Y/N, Lando's home race is soon. So, two of you will make your debut then." he explained. Y/N looked at Lando, the two of their eyes locked together as Zak explained everything.
"Here's the contract and an NDA" Zak said pulling out more papers. "How long will the contract be valid for?" she asked beginning to read it. "For a year" Zak stated. "Don't you have any questions?" Y/N asked Lando. "No" he said shaking his head and proceeded to sign the contract while Y/N took her time to read through it, not wanting to be tied by anything she couldn't be able to repay. Y/N finally signed the paper after a few more minutes of going through the contract. "Welcome to the McLaren family. Don't worry about the expenses, they will be covered by us" Zak said quickly putting the contracts away. "Pleasure doing business with you" Zak remarked. "I hope we get along well" Y/N told Lando, directing her attention to him. "Hope so. My number is in my details. I'll contact you before the weekend. See you on the Thursday after this" Lando stated. "The weekend is on the Saturday or Sunday" Y/N quizzed. "Not in Formula One" Lando said, "I'll text you the details soon" he said leaving before anyone. Y/N watched both Lando and Zak leave, confused at what she had just gotten herself into.
She reached home, kicked off her shoes and plopped down on the sofa before calling her best friend. "Guess what I just did" she said as her best friend answered the call.
Tag list- @gamesetmatch-me @seonghwaexile @yootvi @hadesnumber1daughter @khaylin27 @abq654
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pandorascripts · 3 days ago
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Familiar By Thy Side
author yapping: here is part one to the Salem AU! I've decided to make this multi-chaptered because I don't want to rush the bonding that needs to take place. But, for you readers, I have a question.. do I make it Agathario/Reader? It's at a point right now where it totally could be and it would develop naturally, maybe even better. It's up to y'all though! The second chapter is almost done :) Pairings: Agatha Harkness/Reader Warnings: kidnapping, violence, agatha being agatha
Disclaimer: this is the 1700s. THEY WILL SPEAK AS SUCH. no use of thy and it's other forms because I'm too lazy to learn how to use them and they're strictly used in an informal sense. Let me know thoughts, opinions, and if you'd like to be tagged from this point on for this series :) ----------------------------------------------
Agatha’s calloused hands run along Nicky’s sleeping face, her pointer finger gently gliding down his nose. Her time with him is borrowed, she knows, but even if the knowledge is supposed to find her comfort in the inevitability, she can’t deal with it. Death, her lover, will take the one thing that’s truly ever mattered to her – her baby boy. The denial is strong, Agatha needs to stop Rio from doing her job, no matter the cost. It’s why she’s forced to bring Nicky into her scams – why she’s forced to kill so many witches. Agatha needs power to defeat such a vile eldritch horror – to accomplish something no one has ever done. Even now, she’s managed to stall death when no one else could. If Agatha could trade her spot for Nicky’s, she would.
It’s another one of their scams in the morning, Agatha sweeping some dirt out of her temporary home and through the threshold. Nicky comes bolting in, Agatha’s face holding bewilderment as a witch yells out he’s stolen from her. “You dare shame your mother with theft?” she barks out, setting her broom down whilst Nicky darts out of the house and through the back. Agatha makes sure that he’s out of sight before starting to rile up the witches, a shocked gasp leaving her lips when their magick hits her earlier than she expected. Nonetheless, the power rips through her and settles in her bones, a low groan echoing out of her lips. 
When her eyes are open again, Agatha makes eye contact with a young witch, one who hadn’t blasted her with magick. Wordlessly, you stand and watch in horror and confusion at the scene before you. All you had done was try to chase the thief down with a co-worker of yours, not at all expecting this. 
“What is this?” you gasp out, stuttering a couple steps back from Agatha. 
Her hands wrap around the wooden broom once more, jaw tight and lips clenched. You're visible to Nicky in the doorway now, his eyes darting around to take a good look at you. 
Agatha swings the broom down with a yell, forcing as much impact into the swing so it knocks you out. A hard thud echoes across the house, Nicholas barreling to stop Agatha from hurting you again. 
“Mama, wait,” he says quickly, Agatha’s hands immediately dropping the broom before she herself even realizes Nicky’s in front of her. 
“What are you doing, boy?” 
Despite his mother’s hard tone, Nicky feels something – something like his growing magick. There’s a sense he gets about you – your strength, bubbling just under the surface like his is. He can feel it. You’re powerful and you can aid them to stop Death. 
“She’s – she’s powerful, Mama. You can help her like you’ve helped me – then she can help us stop mo – that lady.” 
Agatha clenches her jaw harder, but tries not to show her frustration with him. He’s a sweet boy, curious and full of a zest for life, but he’s naïve. Too naïve. “No, she cannot help. She’s but a young woman – hardly a witch, Nicky. We’d be best to cover tracks and leave this village. Go back outside now.” 
Nicky shakes his head again, holding his mother’s hand when she grabs for the broom again. “Mama, she can. Please, trust in me.” 
Agatha stares down her boy, lips pursed into a thin line, her hand slack on the broom. It falls to the floor as she turns her head, huffing out. “You’ll be fetching that food for her then, and not complaining when she’s given your sleeping arrangements.” 
Agatha couldn’t say why she agreed to this. You’ll harbor a resentment for her, a hatred, and Agatha’s sure that you’ll need to be killed within your first night so there’s no betrayal. When Nicholas smiles that toothy grin of his, face buried in her stomach a moment later, she knows then why she agreed. Of course, Agatha won’t be giving you his sleeping arrangements or forcing him to fetch you food – you’ll do all of those on your own and Agatha will refuse to look out for you. If you die, you die. If you try to leave, she’ll kill you. If you try to hurt her or Nicky, you’ll be killed as well. 
Your first couple nights with the odd duo finds you quietly nursing a migraine, too timid to speak to either one of them – despite Nicky’s attempts to get you to converse with his never-ending chatter. That innocent boy keeps asking to know from where you come from, why you were alone in that village, what type of witch you are, how strong you are – everything is on the table. His mother – the ever-growing infamous witch-killer – is the exact opposite. The glances she gives you tells you she’s watching you, but she’s comfortable enough in either her own skill or in your lack of, that you're not needed to be constantly watched. She’s yet to introduce herself, as you are to them both too, but Nicholas wasn’t shy about it. He seemingly can’t understand how dangerous of a position you’re in – to be this close to a witch-killer, a traitor, a murder, because he can only see his ever-doting mother, Agatha. 
You shift on the leaves under your dirty dress, the woods doing work on the fabrics. You’re not sure when you’ll have access to more clothes again – hell, you’re not even sure when you’ll have access to the world again. 
“Mama, what is it you’ve made for supper?” Nicky asks, drinking out from a small flask that he then hands to his mother again. 
Agatha watches him, her eyes darting over at you with a mean glare before going back to Nicky. “Bread, some turkey too. You must eat the turkey quickly, I lifted it from the last village and am not sure how much longer it may last.” 
Nicky nods his head, murmuring a “thank you” before diving in. Agatha eats her portion, not sparing you a glance. You’ve expected this – even been able to realize Agatha has no care for you being here. This wasn't her idea, but you’re unaware of the circumstances that require you to be imprisoned by her. Regardless, Nicky’s complete innocence and unawareness of this tension between you and his mother results in him splitting off his food to share with you. 
Agatha glares at you from next to Nicky, your stomach growling and begging you to grab the food offered. Simply, Agatha’s mean glare sends shivers up your spine and stops you from even considering grabbing it for another second. You shake your head at the young boy, fiddling with your hands as you stare down in your lap. The sun is starting to set by now, the light-source mainly coming from the campfire Agatha lit with her magic. Your head turns to watch the hues mix in the sky, so akin to the palettes you used to paint on just days ago. Never in your life had you ever thought you’d miss something that used to be so routinely ingrained in your day-to-day life. 
Nicky looks at his mom before back down at his food, eyebrows pressed together and lips thinned – an expression you’ve seen his mother do countless times over these past couple days. It’s been some time now and she’s yet to introduce herself, which is the least she could do considering the situation she’s forced you into. With a slow blink, fighting a yawn and tears, you stand up and walk over to a tree just a few feet out. Your small shawl is used as a pillow, legs scrunched together so your body is like a ball, and you keep your back to them. The thought that this doesn’t suit your preservation is fleeting, being replaced by a hope that maybe the witch killer will live up to her name with you. 
The night passes and you do actually wake up, waking up in fact to Nicky’s mother watching you. Your head turns to look for the boy, oddly enough, but you can’t spot him at all. Tightening your jaw for a moment, you search again within your immediate vision – nothing. The words leave your lips before you can even think about the repercussions. 
“Where’s Nicky?” 
Agatha shifts from a couple feet away, a blank look on her face. “Nicholas.” 
“What?” You give her an incredulous look, blinking a quick couple times as you watch her fix up her hair. 
“His name is Nicholas to you.” 
Silence suffocates you, just as much as confusion. Why was it such a big deal to her? It was a stupid name, in fact, if names mattered so much to her then why hadn’t she asked for yours yet. Alongside that, why hadn’t she introduced herself to you either? Shrugging mentally, which was definitely paired with an outward huff, you look at the dirt beneath your fingertips. They reach into the soil, your body tingling as you feel connection to the Earth around you. You keep them buried in the dirt, enjoying the warmth it provides before she speaks up. 
“Agatha.” 
Your head snaps. “Excuse me?” “My name. That’s what it is, since you’ve been complaining about your lack of knowing.” 
There’s a nod of your head, face red with embarrassment. Telepathic abilities, alongside siphoning? What else is she harboring? 
“Nothing you’ll find out. You’re not going to be with us for long.” 
Again, your head shoots over to look at her, a sneer on your face. “Out of my mind, witch.” 
“Using the term, but are you not also one?” “I am not a traitor, though.” 
“And what? That simply makes you better? How? You’ve no prior knowledge of what’s led me down this road – what’s led me to take action how I have. You judge without knowing, that is a crime truly more damaging than killing some odd hundreds of mediocre witches.” If her tone is anything to indicate, she’s pissed. You know this, your mind trying to fortify itself from her invasions. 
“You may relax, I don’t tend to dive into the minds of those who are inadequate. There’s nothing there they won’t speak – bigotry, fallacies, and lies.” 
Agatha, as you now know, is brutal in describing her picture of you. There’s not enough time for you to respond even if you had planned to, Nicky – Nicholas jogging into the small clearing. 
“Boy, you were gone too long.” 
“I am sorry, mama, but look at what I’ve made for you,” he says happily, completely missing how his mother is on the brink of homicide. In his hands is a delicate, messy, chunky crown crafted from daisies and other sorts of flowers. They do not go with Agatha’s outfit, her eyes, her glowing skin, or even her deep hair. Agatha looks at it as if it’s a crown fit for the queen. 
“Do you like it?” 
“Oh, Nicky, my love, it is divine. How is it you’ve managed to craft this beauty from such dainty flowers?” 
“Mama, you’re quite the jester this day,” he laughs out, sitting down to rest the back of his head in Agatha’s lap. 
You watch from a bit out, eyes flickering between the son and his mother. At one point, you and your mother had been like that – inseparable, bonded, attached. You can’t really remember the fine points of her face now. 
The conversation and laughs are muffled by your loud heartbeat, which has started to echo in your ears. It’s all-consuming, taking you hostage as you focus on it. With it come memories from before this, your life you lived happily and contently. The one that Agatha ripped away from you. Technically, yes, it was the boy’s fault, but he knew no better. There was nothing but pure child's optimism for his future, the truth about his mother’s treatment of witches slipping his mind. You hadn’t eaten in days now, your body angry and fatigued. 
“Girl, are you listening?” Agatha snaps out, your head moving to face her just as fast as lightning. 
“Apologies?” 
“Good lord.” She pauses to groan softly, Nicky scolds her as her flower crown tips off her head when it drops. “We leave at sundown and travel to the next road in the night. Day time is too popular an opportunity, so we’ll make haste for the river, hours before the next town.”
“What is the town?”
“Salem.”
Your jaw is tightly wound together, wide eyes glaring at Agatha. With a soft shake of your head, which metaphorically shakes off the memories of your brief time in Salem, you speak up. “No, I refuse to travel to that wretched town. Salem will kill us all, how do you not see?” “I’ve lived and breathed Salem many years, you’ll do fine. Long as you stick with the boy and I without speaking your insipid mind,” Agatha spits out, annoyed by you making this more complicated. “We are doing nothing but passing through for a few days. The trials have mainly migrated out of Salem and went southern.” 
“The risk is not worth wherever you long to be. I will not journey with you.” 
You’re sure you’ll be killed by Agatha, right here and right now for your clear disobedience. Alongside that sure reality, you’re positively aware that you’ll die trying to get back to your town. The way is lost on you, completely unfamiliar with the route Agatha has stuck you and Nicholas on. Your thoughts are losing volume, an awkward haze taking over you. Surrounding your vision is a small cloud of purple, one that mimics the colors in Agatha’s usually blue eyes.
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sandplague · 2 days ago
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pathologic 3 save & sound 2024 presentation
this is a quick attempt at a transcript of the presentation. I think I got most of it but there are some words I was unable to hear, I can't say I have a lot of practice doing this and that's on me so if any of you guys can help me I'll edit it asap
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Ressa Schwarzwald: I'm Ressa from Gameowdio. Our team has been working on Pathologic 3 with Vasily Kashnikov and his apprentice Nikolai. This video will feature some of the audio stuff we've made together.
Our goal regarding audio direction was to give the real experience of being in the epicenter of an epidemic. Fully realistic, no bullshit. So we are obviously shooting this video in The Town. We realized pretty early that the game was quite different from the original Pathologic 2 because of the time travel mechanics. So for the prototype we built a time travel machine [the date November 1924 shows on screen], which appeared to be quite useful to record some source sounds, and [date changes to November 3024] make this video in just half a second using existing technology.
Let's start with the music.
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Vasily Kashnikov: Hi, I'm Vasily Kashnikov, audio director of Pathologic 3 project. I'll tell you how our music is structured. We were already thinking about how the Bachelor's game would sound when we were working on Patholgic 2 and writing music for Haruspex. In Pathologic 2, the music had more ethnic and real motives (motifs?) and instruments. Since the city and its customs are familiar with Haruspex since he was a child, he is involved in the traditional way of life. In the case of Pathologic 3, this is the view of an outsider who evaluates everything from the point of view of rationality and science. Therefore, we are trying to make the Pathologic 3 soundtrack colder and more detached from the steppes and ethnicity in character. There is more synthesis, guitars at the same time, the Bachelor communicates with those in power so the soundtrack contains a large share of minimalist so-called furniture music that could sound in the beginning of the last century. Piano etudes and references to composers of that time: Satie, Debussy, etc. The soundtrack is a rather eclectic mix of dreampop, downtempo, and (?) minimalism.
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In the city when the Bachelor is alone with himself, we emphasize the cold mind of the rhythm section: less emotional harmony, and sometimes electronic timbres. In the rooms where we need to separate the main character from those he interacts with, we use more expressive harmonies and more classical instruments: piano and guitar passages.
When we designed the interactive music system, we assumed that time is finite, and the music had to change depending on the amount of time the Bachelor had left. However, we later abandoned this system and now the music changes depending on the state of the Bachelor himself, who can fall into apathy or psychosis. To emphasize these states, we apply filters and effects to different layers of our tracks and get a slower, muffled sound in the case of apathy, and wired (?) nervous, glitchy in the case of psychosis. In the infected quarters, there are interactive systems that... [screen begins to distort] oh my god, Nataliya! Please stop this!
Nataliya Radina: Whoops, hehe, sorry. But yeah, basically the other system we created reflects everything you hear in the game. Such as... If we use our gun when dealing with the local thugs, the longer we aim the weapon at the people, the less sounds of the outside world we hear and the louder becomes the heartbeat. To add to the intensity, sharper tone was used along with a high pitch tinnitus sound. If the psychosis level goes to the maximum, it starts to damage Bachelor's health, which is accompanied by flashes on the screen, as well as low heartbeat and short breathing sounds.
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Vasily Kashnikov: In the infected and rebel's quarters, there are also interactive systems that change the character of the music by adding or disabling instrument layers depending on the state of the world or the Bachelor's equipment to fight the plague. As a result, we have 12 tracks for each day spent in the city. they can freely switch between each other and several dozen themes for locations and characters, and all the music is subject to change depending on the state of the Bachelor.
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Nataliya Radina: Since the game has a weather changing system, we also wanted to reflect that in our audio feedback as well. The game has global wetness parameter that shows how intense the rain is. The more it rains, the more squishy and muddy are the steps of the outside surfaces. Moreover, if you come closer to the window, you can hear the rain pondering on the glass. Even in the middle of the plague, we always have room for cozy moments, right? My favorite part of that system is involving cows. [cow moo]. So, when it's raining, you can actually hear very very soft sound of raindrops dropping on those bovine butts. And I personally think it's beautiful.
Artur Ramanouski: Hi, my name is Artur, and I was also involved in creating some sound assets for the game.
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Probably the hardest thing to record were the footsteps. I had everything planned out: bought the equipment, got every type of surface, but...there was one small thing I overlooked: I live in a city with over 12 million people. Noise everywhere. The solution was simple and ingenious: I recorded everything on a Sunday, because in Buenos Ares, Sunday is the one day when no one does anything.
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Nataliya Radina: One of the most important places in the game is the cathedral. There we have a system of ladders that control the speed and direction of time. Direction wise, we can have it flow normally, or reversed. [entire presentation is rewound very quickly so it's back to Ressa]
Ressa Schwarzwald: She is super professional.
Nataliya Radina: As for the speed, we can make it stand still, go twice as fast, or half normal speed. We created an audio system that has to (?) understand what is actually happening around (inaudible). When we reverse time, spatial effects are added to the surrounding sounds. Ambience, steps, and the mechanism itself. When time stands still, we increase the low frequencies in the ambience, and all the other sounds are muted to zero. Now lastly, when the time goes twice as fast, or half the original speed, the pitch of the surrounding sound changes accordingly.
The coolest part of this system is that it's been actually implemented into the game engine using only one parameter.
Ressa Schwarzwald: Thank you for watching. See you here, later!
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galactic-rhea · 3 days ago
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The thing is,,,,abuse doesn't have anything to do with intelligence or lack of confidence, though yes, a person with low self-esteem is an easier target for abusers, however that's what not I'm talking about.
Like I'm someone who doesn't like to take part in The Discourse (tm) because this is fandom, I'm here to talk about my favorite dolls and create silly scenaries with them. And it might feel a bit egregious to talk about something as delicate and serious as abuse, grooming or domestic violence but also it's the perfect playground to explore such themes and you can learn a lot by psychologically analizing a character and do your own research on the matter so you can understand abuse better, and sometimes that way you can also have a more critical view on real life, and for some of us, also come to terms with our own lives.
That said, back to my original point, it has nothing to do with intelligence. A person that falls into a cycle of abuse doesn't make them stupid, the whole deal of predators and abusers is that they know how to play their game, they know how to manipulate. A victim's mind will always try to cope with the abuse in ways that can be hard to understand sometimes in ways that will make you say 'well, that's enabling their abuser', but is not a statement on their intelligence or lack of it, abuse dynamics are extremelly complex, and victims will go through several states such a guilt, or violent outbrusts, fear, appeasing, avoidance, sometimes all sometimes just a few. And it's because no one is the same and no one's experiences will be the same, even though there are patterns you can identify sometimes.
So when someone wants to argue against a character being too smart to fall for abuse or manipulation, it's a bit sad to me. Not necessarily malicious or dangerous, or anything, again this is fandom and fandom runs rampant with whatever takes that makes all of us grimace. But because that's not how it works, if a certain dynamic isn't abusive by your pov, then it has nothing to do with the character's intelligence. It's not about being strong, or confident; that downplays how abusive dynamics come to be.
Like for example y'know I don't think padmé and anakin were abusive, I've made several posts about it, but it's not because they are too intelligent for that.
Likewise, Anakin wasn't stupid for being groomed by Palpatine; the contrary, he was quite literally a gifted child and a genius at mechanics and was good at many things, including drawing and strategies, but he fell for Palpatine's grooming because:
a) Palpatine is an evil top tier manipulator and predator who knows how to play adults, he literally knew how to play the jedi council, what was a 9 y/o going to do about it.
And b) Anakin's trauma and unattended mental illnesses made him an easier victim for grooming; he was already used to be a thing and be a servant from the moment he learned to talk.
But even if we weren't talking about someone as deeply messed up as Anakin was already, abusers and predators always will take advantage and exploit of the weaknesses and flaws on an individual, they will adapt and change their tactic according to the victim needs, that's why anyone could become a victim, it doesn't matter if your IQ is up there on the moon.
It's not about being too "stupid" to not realize there was abuse, it's a deep, complicated and terrible ensemble of thoughts and insecurities tangling around the brain in such a way that there's no a way to blame the abuser without feeling at fault, or at the very least without feeling scared of retaliation or lost, it's a power dynamic that messes up the sense of self.
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drowninginblox · 2 days ago
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Low Battery
Pt: 1, 2, 3, 4
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"This needs to be perfect," Kurt mutters under his breath. He's been pacing for hours. "Uh-huh..." the one person he knew would help him is not all enthused. "Something they'd never expect!" Kurt declares in a hushed tone. "Yeah..."
It is 3am, and Scott is not happy.
He was woken up by Kurt holding his nose. The worst way to wake up. Thank god Kurt had the foresight to slap his glasses on. But before Scott could yell at him, Kurt already teleported himself and Scott to Kurt's room. Where a chalkboard was filled with various ideas and notes scattered across the floor. Scott didn't know what was happening, but he'd never seen Kurt like this.
"Kurt, what even is this?" he grumbles after waiting ten minutes for a proper explanation. Kurt looks at him and sees Scott holding the bridge of his nose. "Oh, right." Kurt teleports to the chalkboard and spins it round to show 'Ways to confess without fucking it up; by Kurt' Scott stares at the board before dropping his head and sighing. "Kurt we have work in the morning..."
"Coming from the guy that was making noises I never even imagined. You kept me up last night, this is payback." Kurt teleports over to Scott. "And don't worry, we're not alone." He points to the bed at a still-asleep Gambit. Scott holds his face in his hands "Kurt it is 3am-" Scott tries while Kurt slaps Remi awake with his tail. "The fuck-!" Remi yells before looking around, realizing where he is. "Oh god... mon ami...." The cajin groaned. "Really?"
Kurt looks between them "Look- I wouldn't have done this if I didn't think it was important. And I know it's early- but this has been keeping me awake. I need help with this, I can't..." He sighs. "Herr, vergib mir, but I can't fuck it up!" Scott raises a brow and glances at the Gambit. Although Gambit couldn't see it, he felt the shared glance. "Listen, Kurt," Scott says while standing up. "There is no right answer to this." He admits. Remi leans over, putting his elbows on his knees.
"Kurt, I had no idea what to do with Jean. I thought of every outcome, everything I could and couldn't say, every grand gesture I could think of- I could damn near fill a book!" He admits while walking towards Kurt. "But you know what I did?" Scott clasps a hand on Kurt's shoulder, making Kurt look into Scott's visor with nothing but hope.
"I didn't wake up my friends at 3am!"
Remi barked a laugh as Scott tightened his grip on Kurt's shoulder, making the German fear for his life while Scott seethed. But Scott took a deep breath and relaxed his grip with every moment of exhale. Eventually, he calms himself and evenly states the facts. "What I did Kurt, was take a leap of faith." Kurt glanced between Scott's hand and his visor. "That's all it is," Scott affirms before letting go and heading to the door. Kurt doesn't bother to go after him. This stunt was not going to be met with grace in the morning.
When the door closes, Kurt looks at Remi, who is lying on the bed and fiddling with a deck of cards. "How did you get that?" Kurt mumbles. "Pockets mon ami." Kurt glances over Remi's ensemble of boxers and a crop top. "What?" he asks, genuinely confused. Remi rolls his eyes. "Just come over here and play with Gambit." Kurt sighs "Shouldn't you leave too? I woke you up..." Remi only narrows his eyes and flicks an uncharged card- hitting Kurt square in the forehead. "I-ow!" Gambit's eyes widened a little "Damn mon ami, you should've dodged that," He tuts with a smirk. "You have it bad..." Kurt huffs "Schnauze!" Remi chuckles and waves him over, to which Kurt hesitantly obliges, sitting across from Gambit on the bed.
"Gambit got a game for you," He mumbles as he shuffles his cards "Simple one." He assures. "Go fish?" Kurt offers while he props his head with a hand. Remi stares blankly at him. Kurt only smirks back.
Remi starts dealing cards, mumbling intermittently "Go fish? The fuck are we?" Kurt only chuckles. "Well then mon ami, what are we playing?" Remi looks at him. "Because of your remark, war." Kurt perks a little with a playful smile "Really?" Gambit just nods. "Good game to play when you need to ramble." He hands Kurt half of the newly shuffled deck, to which Kurt takes. "Ya know how to play yeah?" Kurt rolls his eyes and starts setting down cards. Remi responds in kind.
They play quietly for a few moments until Kurt finally speaks up "So what did you want to talk about mein fruend?" "Be honest with me Kurt, why do you love them?" Kurts taken aback by the question but slowly answers "Well," Remi continues. "Would you feel this way if this shit didn't happen?" His eyes never leave the cards. Kurt stops "What do you-"
"What is she worth to you?" Kurt throws down his cards. "For the love of- Remi hold on! Lassen Sie mich darüber nachdenken! Es ist schwer zu beschreiben, was sie sein soll, wenn du mich ständig bedrängst! Give me a moment to answer!" Remi looks him dead in the eyes and slowly sits up. He remains quiet, inviting Kurt to speak. Kurt can only sigh. "Siehe- listen, Y/n is my best friend. I would be lost without them, truly." He looks down at his cards. Remi's stack was thicker than his now. He must not have paid attention to how shitty his luck was. "I... I rely on them."
"Reliance isn't love, mon ami." He surmises before taking four more of Kurt's cards as his seven lost to Gambit's ten. "I relied on 'few people back in the Bayu but I loved none of them 'n the way I love y'all. An all tha' nothin' compared to my Cher," He smiles fondly before returning back to Kurt. "But that' all to say, that's far different to jus relyin on someone. You know that." Gambit says with a quick tap to Kurt's shoulder. "Mon ami, I've seen you smitten. And this ain't it." Kurt sighs, putting down his small stack of cards to hold his hands together. "Tell me, ya know Gambit won't tell no one, but ya love them? Truly?"
Kurt closes his eyes and hangs his head "I... I don't know." Gambit smiles at him sadly. "You have one hell of a poker face mon ami," He says while shuffling close to Kurt. "But ya get tells. Everyone does." Kurt only sighs "Gambit, what do I do, Bruder?" Gambit claps an arm around Kurt's shoulder and pulls him into a side hug. Kurt softens a little at the much-needed contact. "Ya figure it out before ya commit." He mumbles, his voice seeping with genuineness. "And if I hurt them?" the smaller mumbles. Gambit shakes his head. "It would hurt them more if ya lied, mon ami. Trust me, I know." He says with a smirk. Kurt smiles a little at that. "Player." He mumbled. Gambit chuckled and held Kurt tighter for a moment "Gotta try ya luck." Kurt scoffs playfully.
Gambit starts collecting his cards. Kurt helps him out. It's a silent task, but when they finish they only look at each other knowingly. "Ya gotta be true to yaself, Kurt." Gambit eventually says, a deep understanding coursing through his words. "If ya don't trust yaself in that, then trust Gambit." Kurt can only look away. Gambit sighs. "Ya trust me right?" Kurt nods. "Ja... with mein life." Gambit clasps his shoulder and squeezes it lightly. "Then follow ya heart, not what they may want." Kurt takes a moment before nodding to the sentiment. Gambit smiles slightly before heading out of the room and closing the door behind him. Once he's gone, Kurt looks to the chalkboard and the scattered papers of fantasmal plans. But now he can only see them as what they are- fantasy.
That night was restless, but he tackled the following day with a spirit he didn't know he had. Scott rightfully scolded him for last night and suspended him from missions unless told otherwise; whatever that means. Meanwhile, Gambit only requested that Kurt would wait until about 6am to drag his ass into early morning ramblings, and that said practice would be mutual if continued. Kurt took both of these helpings in grace.
But after these moments, Kurt otherwise found the day unnoteworthy. In fact, he found the following days the same way until the fifth. He’s known about the constant the whole time, but considering the circumstances he didn’t want to pry immensely.
Eventually, the intrusive thought got out. "Hey, Ororo?" Kurt asked during the lunch period, "Do you know where Y/n is?" Ororo looks over to Kurt. "Their classroom. They've been rather occupied for the last few days." She notes as she closes the fridge. Kurt nods at this and heads to Y/n's classroom immediately after this confirmation.
Something in his soul tugged at his being, encouraging him to check up on them. For what reason, he didn't know. Call it intuition, call it dumb luck, but Kurt was walking to Y/n and neither of them could stop this interaction. Yet it was only when he was a little over a yard from their door did he realized he had no good reason to do so.
He stopped in his tracks, midstep away from the inevitable. A rushing thought offered an out; 'You told her you needed time...' his eyes lingered on the door before looking away. The room seemed to chill with the harsh truth of Kurt not really knowing what he was doing. 'What was this even supposed to do?' The casoums of his mind offered. 'Is this something for you or Y/n?'
The lump in his throat grew at the implications of that question. Even though his fur allowed him to be semi-resistant to the cold, he could feel goosebumps rise from his skin. His body worked on autopilot, directing him to the wall next to their door and leaning against it only to slink down to a curl of a sit. The tail he always claimed to have a mind of its own, wrapped itself around his calve. A gentle squeeze was the only consultation he deserved while he leaned his head against his knees.
A deep inhale, and a deeper exhale quelled his nerves for a few moments only to have them flood. "Mein gott..." He mumbled into his jeans. "What would Y/n do?" He couldn't help but mumble against the warring thoughts. The carnage of what ifs and absolutes desolated anything in their path while Kurt could only sit and watch as he tore himself apart. He didn't know how long he sat there, but something broke him away from the battle. "The last thing I want is you attempting to force feelings that aren't there." Y/n's voice echoed, making him perk. He closed his eyes, forcing the memory back.
They didn't realize how close they were to him. At least, he doesn't think so. Just a few inches apart, that was the only thing separating them. And yet they didn't risk it. "Kurt," They mumbled. If it wasn't for the faint candlelight, he wouldn't have seen the bright but conflicting emotions in their eyes. There was a bittersweetness in that intimacy. One that Kurt couldn't help but wonder if they understood the possibility that came with such a risk as that one.
Their hand served as the only ground at that moment. But the cool touch of your hand was giving way to the warmth of Kurt's cheeks. "You deserve only the best that the world has to offer." Their assurance was warmer than the candlelight. Its glow crowned them in a halo of surreality. It was unlike anything he'd seen before. "Do not put your happiness aside for me." And their words. The reverence was something of a prayer... devoted and kind. And yet, all the while pleading for something they could only hope for.
"Please, be happy in any way you want, just don't hurt yourself in the process." All he could do was attempt to recover from his speechlessness as the friend he'd had for years on end morphed into someone else before his very eyes. The quick-witted sarcasm and the air of confidence were gone. For once in a long time, Y/n was vulnerable in a way Kurt had only seen once, maybe even twice before.
The bell marking the end of the period was over broke Kurt away from his recollections immediately. As the sounds of footsteps grew nearer and nearer, he stood and dusted himself off. He spared your door one last look before a BAMF took him back to his classroom, where he could only sigh against his desk. The stale air of his room was no Eden, but it was better than getting questioned by the students.
"Reiß dich zusammen, Wagner, wir müssen eine lösung finden..." he mumbled before combing a hand though his hair. His tail swished to and fro. The hallways filled with noise. "Time to be normal..."
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hollowed-theory-hall · 2 days ago
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Hi, Im not sure if youve written anything about this before (I had a quick look but couldnt see anything), but I find Hermione's relationship with her parents kinda interesting. Obviously they're pretty chill with her being a witch — they go to diagon with her at least once and seem quite interested in that sort of thing, they're obviously very proud of her — but by about gof and ootf theyre completely absent from her life. Hermione doesnt seem to go home during that summer holiday and seems to spend the rest with the Weasleys which I find incredibly odd. Her parents were obviously not abusive, nor were they in any sort of danger until dh when Hermione goes on the run (and of course she oblivates them and moves them to Australia first). Voldemort doesnt even make any attacks until hbp because hes lying low. I just cant think why shes suddenly estranged from her parents to the point where they allow their only teenage daughter, who already spends majority of her time in Scotland, to spend her holidays with a family thats already financially struggling?? Surely no actual parent would do that. Of course it could be lazy writing by JK or the rising popularity of Hermione after directorial choices in the films which called for more page-time, but Id be very interested to hear your opinions on the topic because for the life of me I can't figure this out.
(sorry for the long ask)
Hi, no problem about the long ask.
I think Hermione's parents are probably one of the things JKR didn't think through, but I like looking at things like that froma an in universe prespective. And in universe the relationship between Hermione and her parents, while not abusive, has been estranged from day 0.
What I mean by it, is that I don't think Hermione was ever very close to her parents. We see how a muggleborn who is close to his parents acts with Colin Creevey:
“So I can prove I’ve met you,” said Colin Creevey eagerly, edging further forward. “I know all about you. Everyone’s told me. About how you survived when You-Know-Who tried to kill you and how he disappeared and everything and how you’ve still got a lightning scar on your forehead” (his eyes raked Harry’s hairline) “and a boy in my dormitory said if I develop the film in the right potion, the pictures’ll move.” Colin drew a great shuddering breath of excitement and said, “It’s amazing here, isn’t it? I never knew all the odd stuff I could do was magic till I got the letter from Hogwarts. My dad’s a milkman, he couldn’t believe it either. So I’m taking loads of pictures to send home to him. And it’d be really good if I had one of you” — he looked imploringly at Harry
(CoS)
He tries to keep his muggle parents up to date with his life in the wizarding world. He brought a camera explicitly for that purpose. Hermione, on the other hand, never really included her parents in her life. They try to be supportive, they go with her to Diagon, but I'm convinced they know very little of what's going on at Hogwarts with their daughter.
I mean, she probably tells them about her high grades and about Harry and Ron, but she probably never told them about Voldemort, or at least, not much. Or about the bigotry she has to deal with as a muggleborn. I'm also pretty sure she didn't tell them how dangerous Hogwarts is or that she got petrified in 2nd year. I mean, I don't know about you, but if my daughter told me everything that happened to Hermione, I would start asking about alternative magical education that isn't Hogwarts.
I think Hermione was always a lonely child, her parents were likely at work or conventions more often than with her and she is used to hiding things from them. Hermione 100% used to be bullied in her muggle primary school, you see it in how she acts, and I think she didn't tell her parents about that either. So Hermione and her parents were never close in my opinion.
And then, you take this girl who is used to hiding the less pleasant aspects of her life from her parents and send her to the wizarding world. And she's smart, she quickly realizes no one wants to hear about dentists and that she doesn't belong. So she shuts up, she stops bringing her parents up since everyone thinks surgeons are just maniacs who cut into people. So she reads up, she studies everything she can so she would belong, because she never found herself in the muggle world and she loves magic. She loves the wizarding world and chooses to be part of it, even at the price of cutting her parents out of her life.
In first year, Hermione goes back home for Christmas, but from year 2 and onwards she stays at Hogwarts becouse she doesn't want to miss out in that year's mystery, or time with Ron and Harry. She, like Harry, doesn't want to leave the wizarding world for a world they consider worse.
And the fact she does her best to spend more and more time in the wizarding world is an extension of that. It's not that she hates her parents, she loves them, but she loves them less than she loves the wizarding world.
I think, the moment in book 4 in which she took the chance to fix her teeth magically against what her dentist parents would think is right, is a moment that shows that clear choice. Mr. and Mrs. Granger clearly care about Hermione and want what's best for her, but Hermione thinks she is better than them because she is a witch. She treats her parents like children who don't know what's good for them. She knows because she's a witch, so she can send them away for their safety. They might think using magic on her teeth is dangerous, but they're muggles they don't know better. Even Hermione falls into this prevalent mindset among wizards that they know better than muggles.
The Creevy brothers wanted to keep both the wizarding world and their parents. Hermione chose the wizarding world. She figured that if she truly wanted to belong and be up to date with everything, months in the muggle world would make this assimilation harder, so she stayed in the wizarding world. And when the time comes to make a hard decision to Obliviate her parents and send them away, it is easier to rationalize. She hasn't been part of their life for so long anyway, they would hardly notice the difference, besides, she's the witch, she's the one in the know, not them.
It's quite sad, but it's a result of Hermione's decision to assimilate into the wizarding world as if she was always there which is, I think, influenced by the bigotry that is everywhere. I mean, even the Weasleys look down on muggles:
“Are they doctors?” he [Harry] asked Ron quietly. “Doctors?” said Ron, looking startled. “Those Muggle nutters that cut people up? Nah, they’re Healers.”
(OotP)
So, yeah, Hermione chose to be a witch, and to her, that means cutting her parents she was never too close to out of her life.
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accio-victuuri · 17 hours ago
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it’s been a while since i’ve shared my recent reads! so here’s what i have picked up in the past months. felt inspired cause i’m really enjoying the story i’m reading now, w/c i initially picked up as a manhwa but i’m impatient so i switched to the novel. it’s called the hunter is gonna lay low or the hunter wants to live quietly. it’s such a gem! cause it starts of pretty simple and funny then the author manages to put in the plot and well, it’s plotting. lol.
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if you like systems/dungeons, cast of characters, time travel, mystery and the most delicious slow burn then this is for you. i hope this gets animated at some point cause it’s so good! 👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼 this is the only novel on the list so it’s pretty special that the story led me to WANT to read the source.
i’m literally listing what i’ve read so yeah. and pretty much a v short reaction to it cause there is a lot (53). it’s a mix of ongoing and completed works at the time of writing and when i read it so i’ll mark that too.
1. Sweetie, Sweetie, Sweetie - this title is so misleading cause you would think it’s a modern story full of sweetness when it’s not. this deals with kingdoms/royalty, superpowers — and isekai.
2. How my Daddies Became mates (completed) - first foray into mangas because i most prefer manhwa/manhuas — i know, sacrilege. but yeah, it’s a cute story of two dad telling their kid how they met and fell in love. It’s so wholesome! a short read when you feel tired of all the toxic bl stories. 😂😂😂
3. Unintentional Love Story (completed) - pick this up! it’s so good! slice of life kind of vibe and falling in love in a small town.
4. Someone like You (completed) - this was something i started before and went back in now that it’s completed.
5. Isekai no Sata Wa shachiku shidai - i don’t really go for Mangas but this one pulled me in! I love myself some isekai plot. it’s just sad that no one has updated the translation for so long so that may put some people off in picking this up.
6. Bend over Backwards (completed) - corporate slave x international model. if you like this kind of dynamic then go ahead. Only 40 chapters plus a bunch of side stories so this kind of thing is a good choice.
7. Dinner with a Vampire - pretty obvs with the title.
8. Mister Wonderful teases me
9. Romance but not Romantic - omegaverse! the kind where the omega needs the alpha but initially hated him.
10. Be, Be. - omegaverse with modern royalty!
11. Smoky Nectar 1 - a short read that continues to a part 2 and it’s good ✌🏼
12. Smoky Nectar 2
13. Reincarnated to Devil King Evelogia’s World - this is so uniquely unhinged that it became. endearing. No. I swear. I haven’t read anything like it. I love it tho. Maybe some people will find it over the top but it’s now one of my personal faves.
there’s an animated version of it if you wanna start with that just to see how cute they are lol.
14. Bullying the Dog - an MC who didn’t get much love then he meets the ML who shows him what it’s like. it’s so somft.
15. Bittersweet Martini (completed) - i’m gonna cheat here and copy/paste the first comment on this story cause i think it perfectly describes the story: “If you're looking for a casual pleasure read with a green flag story with heavy flirting, which leads to a lot of blushing but also deals with a more serious topic towards the middle, without leaning too much into the drama, then look no further.”
16. Over the Paradise - guideverse with zombies!
17. Hero vs Villain - what happens when the supposed hero and villain become friends and fall in love? this was so nice!
18. Night of London - vampire and werewolf pairing! come on! Let’s gooooo! 🙌🏼
19. Kill my love - omegaverse and assassins!
20. Turning - Another work that i would most likely pick up the novel version cause it’s that good! Regression theme! ❣️plus the setting is they are in a kingdom where people have powers.
21. The Moon is coming to me - I have already talked bout this before and it’s one of my absolute faves! I didn’t know the Manhua was released! So i was so happy to enjoy it in that form. The translation for this is very close to the end so pick it up!
22. Cozy Obsession - transmigration where the MC knows how the story goes so he is trying his best to change the ending.
23. Summertime (completed) - one of my favorites! love it when friends become lovers and some may say the ML here is manipulative but i wanna say in a good way. lol. anyway, it’s classic, atleast from the MC’s side that you’ve known this person some time and that summertime everything has changed.
24. My way with you (completed) - gonna cheat again with this one by pasting here what someone commented: “LISTEN UP GUYS this one has everything: healthy happy relationship, supportive friends, trauma and healing, mysterious past connections, beautiful men, hot af smut, 100% consent, cutest lovey dovey couple, NO drama, NO “misunderstandings”, NO second ml, NO annoying interfering side characters. You will cry, but because it’s just so good.” 💯
25. Netkama Punch - i haven’t finished and progressed much as i would like tho i know a lot of people have this as their favorite! I will get back to it! The premise of hidden identity and online gaming is one of my fave so i will surely pick this up again.
26. Through the Years - i haven’t finished this yet but it’s a lot of people’s fave
27. Fools (completed) - disillusioned guy meets excitable puppy 🤍
28. Moonquake (completed) - a very unique concept. people on earth have powers and then some of them decided to rebel and live in the Moon. Our MC is one of the best ones on earth and is supposed to bring down the leader of the rebellion. but you all know what happens, they fall in love! AHHHHH! and i have to say the art in this too is exceptional.
29. Men’s wear store and the Royal Princess (completed) - this may be weird for some or slow / not enough action lol. i enjoyed it tho! the MC cross dresses and finds someone who loves and accepts him!
30. Ex Hot Neighbor (completed) - a story that centers around a misunderstanding! MC thinks he can’t date the neighbor cause he’s his friend’s ex. but nope!
31. Forest Sea (completed) - A good and solid fantasy story. Please give it a try! The whole birds vs snakes thing was kinda weird at first but the author made it work.
32. When you were asleep - this hasn’t been updated in a while and it’s so sad because the art is topnotch! the plot is good too, especially the dreamscapes but there’s still a lot to discover cause we wanna know what happened in the past. Why is MC even having these dreams and all that.
33. Beum & Go’s Unholy…. - still ongoing and read few chapters
34. Spring, the color of love (completed) - what a wonderful story. Oftentimes, as a reader, you have that sense of boundary with the narrator. But this one — you can feel and understand what the MC is thinking and going through. even tho i haven’t experienced what he did, i can totally get it. this is one of those tropes where they fall in love during their school years and some misunderstanding happens, they meet again years later and try again. something i would love to re-read even if there are parts of it that hurt. and it’s just proof that if something is meant to be, it will come back to you.
35. Keep Holding On (completed) - a short and sweet read with friends to lovers trope!
36. Wolf in the House (completed) - i am so late with this cause i feel like every list has this story as one of the best. I have to agree! it’s so good! tho i have to say i’m more attached to the second pairing. this one is a perfect mix of fantasy, action, comedy and romance. A solid recommendation!
37. Touch within the Abyss (completed) - AAAAAHHHHHH! a hitman x blind cinnamon roll! read it now! please! it’s so sweet! their love and care for each other is so pure 🥹🥹🥹🥹🥹
38. 99% in love season 1 (completed) - from bestfriends to lovers in the cutest way! they start fake dating and it leads to more obvs.
39. 99% in love season 2 - their college life and this one has smut scenes!
40. Alpha Trauma ( novel ongoing ) - if you know Omega Complex then you might be aware that this is a sequel of sorts but follows the second lead’s love story if you may. Everyone loves Dohyun so i’m one of those happy readers who is happy that he gets his own story, tho the POV in this is not his but his Omega. If you like ABO and campus setting then this may be for you.
41. Soul Sealer’s school life - The MC is the soul sealer who has to do good deeds to prolong his life, then he meets the ML who has a strong spirit in him. It’s a perfect blend of fantasy, comedy and not so much romance as of the moment. The art is 💯 and i really like to see where this goes!
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42. Guidance with Benefits - still ongoing and read few chapters
43. Chiguha Kuna Kisu (completed) - if you like a short read that will make you have overall good vibes then this is it. school setting, two cute boys, a fortunate miscommunication and starting a relationship. it’s so good and made me want to look for more mangas! 🤍
44. Spicy Milk Candy - yandere but in a good way. that’s all i’m gonna say.
45. Ruby Red wo Kamikudaku (completed) - i’m just gonna add the summary below but it’s truly a unique read!
Akane is an Omega who can see people's pheromones as multicolored "crystals”. During his school days, when he was lonely because of his peculiar constitution, he meets Makise, a school nurse teacher. 5 years later, they are miraculously reunited, but Makise has a secret
46. Yume Nara Doko Made Yurusaremasuka (completed) - corporate slave x young policeman. 6 chapters of sweetness!
47. Sparkling Baby (completed) - this is supposedly a sequel for the second lead, but i haven’t read the first story. I just love how the MC/ML first met and then made a mark on each other as strangers — but it wasn’t there time yet. and so they meet again later and navigate their lives together. What attracted me to this story is how the MC changed because of love. For years, he had this sense of what he think is love and looking back, maybe it didn’t work out because love isn’t supposed to be like that. What he found with the ML is real and why it feels different.
48. Ashita kimi no mono ni shite (completed) - this so wholesome! school setting and friends to lovers. quiet boy x cool guy
49. Koibitu Keiyaku chu ni suki (completed) - friends to lovers! fake dating. and well, look at them. so precious together:
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50. Camboy Bunny (completed) - i think the title says it all. A delicious read!
51. Beyond the Memories - AAAAAHHHHHHH! the story in itself should be sweet and fluffy but the author manages to squeeze in the undercurrent of there is something wrong. as a reader, there is something big that we don’t know and once it comes out — all of it will be shattered. it looks like there is some sort of regression and MC doesn’t know this but the ML does. The question here is when his memories will come back and will he forgive the ML. We are not in that part yet with what’s available right now so i’m excited!
52. Private Call (completed) - another omegaverse.
53. Senza Replica - guide/esper. very few chapters out and something i will go back to.
I read everything except the novel at BATO. 🫶🏼 covering my may-october 2024 reads.
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brujamala-aka-gigi · 9 hours ago
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₊ ⊹ . ݁˖ . ݁ mini pac 。⋆。 ゚
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random tarot messages
150 word readings <3
these are bite sized tarot messages with no specific questions being answered, just leaving things to chance and hopefully getting you a piece of knowledge from the cards.
pngs by @florietas
dividers by @aquazero and @cafekitsune
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pile one pile two pile three
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pile four pile five pile six
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‧͙˚ *༓ scroll down for the readings ⋆ִ ‧͙⁺˚
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〰 𝒕𝒉𝒆 𝒓𝒆𝒂𝒅𝒊𝒏𝒈𝒔 〰
˚ ༘`✦ ˑ ִֶ pile number one 𓂃⊹
page of wands
It's a good moment to reevaluate the source of your opinions and ideas, as soon you will feel a streak of creative energy and it'd be good to build stronger ideas before you begin to place them in reality or to manifest them onto it. Also an amazing moment to look for connections between the mundane and the divine, not waiting for explicit answers but instead, you should expect the way in which you ask questions to allow for more profound relationships with knowledge. Ideally, you’d channel your creativity in a way that enhances your freedom and expands your possibilities instead of imposing complex dogmatic beliefs to yourself.
˚ ༘`✦ ˑ ִֶ pile number two 𓂃⊹
the empress
Allow yourself to get in touch with the things that come naturally to you instead of forcing yourself to align with actions that are too detrimental for them to bring any actual value or positive impact in your life. I wouldn't take this card into the “divine feminine” approach to things, as it seems more like a calling to nurture your inner world and your personal environments by being in tune with what is genuine to you, and to the way in which you bring value for yourself. I think you are underestimating the valuable qualities you possess and how your energy can be channeled and empowered by just paying more attention to what you deem as “low effort” but can be “high effort” to others. Don't shy away from being confident in your virtues. 
˚ ༘`✦ ˑ ִֶ pile number three 𓂃⊹
five of wands 
Avoiding conflict at all costs is not ideal, but engaging in conflictive situations guided by your ego is no good either. Sadly, you will be provided with said tense situations so it's better that you take the time to think about how you process feelings of anger, stress and insecurity. You need to be as aware of your own feelings as much as you are capable of deciphering how others might deal with them, especially if their approach to them is outwardly aggressive. There's nothing completely wrong with impulsiveness and emotional reactions, they can lead to meaningful emotional or existential developments; only if there's time, energy and will to do so. Learn how to know when to face obstacles like these and when they're not exactly obstacles, but more of an annoying temporary situation. 
˚ ༘`✦ ˑ ִ�� pile number four 𓂃⊹
the wheel of fortune
Although it is impossible to have full control over one’s perceived destiny or the chaotic nature of the universe, good fortune relies on the ability to humble our needs for control. As much as it’s healthy to navigate difficult and stressful situations without allowing our emotions to have a negative impact, it is also necessary that we don’t become overly confident and arrogant when things seem to be working in our favor. There’s plenty of our surroundings that we are unable to control and many things within ourselves that are just as difficult to deal with, therefore, it is in our best interest to develop tools and structures that can function as guidance towards a consciousness state that allows us to navigate the ups and downs of life without neglecting the feelings we deal with as a consequence.
˚ ༘`✦ ˑ ִֶ pile number five 𓂃⊹
the moon
You need to allow yourself to distrust and question others. Although it's “common sense” to have good intentions, to be kind, to be respectful and so on, at this point in time we cannot truly have faith that everyone shows a tendency towards having a bare minimum of empathy or at least good intentions. It is easy to follow your intuition or your gut feelings when danger is easily perceived, but trusting your intuition is harder when there are deceptions or illusions that make it so we are almost gaslighting ourselves about how awful we are for not trusting in something or someone because there isn't anything negative in sight. Key word: IN SIGHT. If something doesn’t make enough sense to your peace of mind, it's most likely not worth making it fit into your life. 
˚ ༘`✦ ˑ ִֶ pile number six 𓂃⊹
page of swords
This card serves as a reminder to keep nurturing your curiosity, specifically by putting an emphasis on the knowledge you can acquire by being more open to hearing about others' experiences. I don’t think you are particularly interested in finding a sense of belonging by allowing people to impose their beliefs onto you, but I do see that maybe you are in need of company to further develop and deepen your relationship with knowledge. You don’t need to hurry up and become desperate to know everything about anything, you also don’t need to limit yourself and your possibilities to traditional ways of learning. At this moment, embracing the unconventional and unexpected teachings, everyday life observations and your own personal thoughts and opinions, will give you the motivation to strengthen your relationship with the more intellectual parts of yourself.
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if you enjoyed this post, feel free to check the rest of my account <3 ppssst keep an eye on this blog, there's going to be some ask games and im giving away some free readings soon ;)
masterpost ✶ pac readings ✶ tarot menu
✶ ko-fi page (support and tarot services) ✶
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writersdrug · 1 month ago
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I had my first kiss in a hot tub with a guy I had just met. I was up on the ledge of the hot tub and he was in the water in between my legs, and ngl it was a GOOD ASS KISS! And sadly…. I haven’t kissed anyone since….. 😔
Daaaaaaamn MMM that sounds like it would heal me
You just gotta have down time in-between the good kisses like that, you probably have another good one comin up
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erodingsinner · 5 months ago
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Arrow if Slade and Oliver had a fucked up toxic romantic thing going
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willowser · 1 year ago
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Wait, you deactivated?!! I thought u got suspended?☠️☠️💀 , I was really like damnnnnnnnnn😭😭😭😭😭😭. WELCOME back tho💖💖💖💖💖💖💯💯💫💫💫💫💥💥
yeah, i actually privated ! and — i don't know how to explain why to yall without 1) oversharing, 2) being super long-winded, and 3) sounding like a crybaby LOL but the long-short of it is: i was getting a decent amount of negative feedback the last few weeks and a final comment kind of launched me into this weird episode where i was sort of forced to face this hurt that i had been avoiding for a few years, and then i felt really uncomfortable and embarrassed and nakey, so i didn't want anyone to look at me LOL but i'm on the mend now, so thank you ! 🩷✨️
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Working in publishing, my inbox is basically just:
Article on the Horrors of AI
Article on How AI Can Help Your Business
Article on How AI Has Peaked
Article on How AI Is Here to Stay Forever
Article on How AI Is a Silicon Valley Scam That Doesn't Live Up to the Promise and In Fact Can't Because They've Literally Run Out of Written Words to Train LLMs On
#allison's work life#artificial generation fuckery#in point of fact we're lumping a lot of things into 'AI' so probably bits of them are all true#i think AI narration probably is here to stay because we've been mass training that for ages (what did you think alexa and siri were?)#i think ai covers will stick around on the low price point end unless those servers go the way of crypto#but as with everywhere they'll be limited because you can't ask an ai for design alts#(and do you guys know how many fucking passes it takes to make minute finicky changes to get exec to sign off on a cover?)#i think ai translation for books will die on the vine - you'd have to feed the whole text of your book to the ai and publishers hate that#ai writing is absolute garbage at long form so it will never replace authorship#it's also not going to be used to write a lot of copy because again you'd have to feed the ai your book and publishers say no way#like the thing to keep in mind is publishers want to save money but they want to control their intellectual property even more#that's the bread and butter#the number 1 thing they don't want to do is feed the books into an LLM#christ we won't even give libraries a fair deal on ebooks you think they're just going to give that shit away to their competitors??#but also i don't think the server/power/tech issue is sustainable for something like chatgpt and it is going to go the way of crypto#is humanity going to create an actual artificial intelligence that can write and think and draw?#yeah probably eventually#i do not think this attempt is it#they got too greedy and did too much too fast and when the money dries up? that's it#maybe I'm wrong but i just think the money will dry out long before the tech improves
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alagaisia · 6 months ago
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This is something I learned at one of the pre-op visits for my breast reduction! My surgeon was basically I think an independent surgeon (as I guess I would imagine is common for “cosmetic”/plastic surgeons?) and she was telling us a little bit about what to do for talking to insurance about the surgery and stuff, and she mentioned that for us going through insurance it would be at a particular hospital, but she also often did surgeries where people didn’t use there insurance, and she did those at some other place, and the price she charged up front was much lower, because that was the actual cost of the surgery (and equipment and everyone’s salaries etc.) and she had to raise the ticket price significantly when people would go through insurance, because the insurance company would negotiate that price down, and then keep some of the money. (Obviously for us and many others it still worked out to be cheaper for us out of pocket to go through insurance, but the amount she made was roughly the same even though it would look like she charged thousands more for my breast reduction than for someone not using insurance)
So, when you get those bills from your insurance after a doctors visit, and there’s that little table that tells you, this is the cost of the visit, this is the discount we got you, this is how much we paid, this is how much you still have to pay?
That line about “we got you this discount” is misleading. They actually caused the provider to raise the initial cost of your care by that amount, or more, in anticipation of the insurance company refusing to pay the full amount so that they could tell you they got you a discount.
"Why does a 15-minute visit with a doctor cost 150 bucks in America???" you're gonna want to read Money-Driven Medicine, by Maggie Mahar, and probably also The Social Transformation of American Medicine, to answer that question. It is not because your doctor is a greedy bastard; your doctor does not see most of that money. It is because the system is broken to a level that is truly impressive in its dedication to making a shit ton of money for insurance company executives and shareholders.
#my doctors visits are always around 3 or 400 for me because they never get billed as physicals because I also need prescriptions filled#and I need to go in 4x a year because adderall is so heavily restricted#and my last visit was actually $700 because they needed to drug test me not even for a real reason but because at the previous visit when#they drug tested me (also for bullshit reasons- to check that I was taking my meds instead of selling them or soemthing)#it came up with a false positive for opioids. which I don’t have access to or interest in and would not have been in my system#(mom’s nurse friend hypothesized that maybe the poppy seeds on the wverythign bagel I probably had for breakfast that morning set it off. it#seems like that’s a pretty common food to have and they should either warn you ahead of time about that or it shouldn’t be sensitive enough#to pick that up)#and insurance was like ‘we got you a $195 discount’ which is bs and ‘we paid $4’ which is even stupider#so now at my next virtual visit I’m gonna have to say hey I know the answer is no because of institutionalized stigma against me that you’re#not willing to push back on but I can’t fuckingn afford to keep paying $1600+ a year for what at this point is a middle man between me and a#pharmacist because I’ve been on this medication for fucking ages and all my other ones could be refilled at a yearly physical#so is there any way we could change things up somehow. and she’s going to say no. and I’m going to be angry and upset about it for days#back when i was at my pediatrician I had to go in every six months which was annoying but I would happily go back to that over four times a#year#but idk if the rules changed or if the rules are different for adults or if my doctor just sucks bc I brought that up early on and she was#like no this is what we do#I mean. I can technically afford it. I have the money I’m not going into medical debt or anything. I live at home with my parents and have#very low living expenses and my checking account is limited primarily by my own standards of how much I’ve decided I want to be putting into#my savings account each paycheck. but when the biggest expense in my life is something that already frustrates me and that I know is exp too#expensive and that I feel I shouldn’t have to be doing anyway and I know I’m being treated unfairly#it just feels so much worse. having to take money out of my savings account wouldn’t be the end of the world. but it feels wrongs#and I only make like $36#lmao I forgot about the commas thing.#like $36k a year so I also am aware that even though I’m in a lucky place where I’m stable that’s not *that* much money and I feel like that#is how I tend to think of things. because I’m not going to live with my parents forever and I’m deeply aware that for most people who have#to pay a rent or a mortgage $36k is the lower end of things and a seven fucking hundred dollar doctors bill is a big fuckingn deal#for a regular fucking doctors appointment#it’s not like I fucking asked to be drug tested they said ‘pay us to look at your pee or else’#it’s all bullshit
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baekuras · 15 days ago
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I so far enjoy Dragon Age Inquisition enough to continue on but also why is there so much of nothingness or what feels like it gsdgfh It's so different from the previous game I am surprised they are of the same series but like...aight sure let's do open world with nothing in it-I know that genre at least
Look I've played like 10 hours and I do wanna look into everything but alas every climbable looking mountain won't let me and around 5 hours were spent with the same 3 non talkactive companions so give me some time to get into it when I am used to the closeness and...chaos of Kirkwall and that crew
i JUST found Iron Bull (nice guy) after getting Sera(girl help) and Vivienne (apparently a bitch but so far I only get business woman vibes off her so....guess it fits?)
i still maintain that Solas in this looks goofy due to his big head to body ratio, mitigated by giving him bulky looking armor Varric is Varric no notes Cassandra is also cool, no notes
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corkinavoid · 1 month ago
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DPxDC Danny the Guy Who Won't Die
He lives in Gotham, and he is just A Guy. Nothing weird about him, he's just there to study/work/help Lady Gotham to lift her curse/on vacation with Sam. Point is, he is not there to cause trouble and there's no GIW on his tail. Just a dude living his (after)life.
And Gotham, being Gotham, still finds a way to be annoying. There are mugging attempts, robbery, Rogues running around. Only Danny really doesn't want to deal with any of it.
Now there's a dilemma. If he uses his powers to fight, it will sooner or later come to Bats' attention. And if he fights as a human, it will also alert some of the Bats since he doesn't really do a great job at keeping his power levels low. Not to mention the fact he is really not enthusiastic about accidentally punching someone hard enough he sends them to a hospital.
What does he do instead? He pulls the 'I guess I'll die' act.
So every time he is attacked, he just plays dead. The mugger shot him in the chest? He falls down and stops breathing. Caught up in the middle of a Poison Ivy attack? Skewers himself on the vine and goes lax. Scarecrow's Fear Gas? Very dramatically chokes himself and plays a corpse. He makes sure to disappear before any ambulances arrive later, and it all goes well for a few months - he is just a casualty, who cares, really - until one day, he runs into that same mugger who shot him in the chest a while ago.
The man does a double take. Danny doesn't notice - he's been mugged so many times, who has the brain capacity to remember all of those fuckers. But the rumor goes out anyway.
A guy-who-won't-die. It's more of a city legend, really, and the Bats don't give it much thought since, well, it sounds stupid and not very important. A rumor of some man who was shot dead and then showed up like nothing happened? Yeah, it's probably because the mugger didn't check if he was actually dead. That happens. Maybe it wasn't even the same man, Gotham is a big city. If anything, hey, at least that was one less casualty? That's a good thing.
That is, until one day, they show up to Joker's hostage situation and witness the clown screaming at one of the hostages. He is so enraged he is shaking, spit flying out of his mouth, and, contrary to the usual Joker's evil sneers and maniacal laughter, he seems just... furious. But, like, the normal-human-level furious. The 'I just lost the last ounce of patience with you' furious.
"Don't you look away from me, you think I don't remember you?! Na-ah, I do. You were the one I drowned in the shark tank last week! And you were the one run through the chainsaw trap two weeks before that! And you were in the guillotine!!! I saw your fucking head get deattached from your body, how the fuck are you here again?!"
And the guy he is screaming at just looks at him, confused and incomprehensive.
"Um, I'm pretty sure I'd remember getting my head cut off, you know? So, err, wrong guy."
"Wrong guy my fucking ass-"
Joker is so distracted by his screaming match that it makes it almost too easy for the Bats to fight him down and drag to Arkham. Yet, a few of them get just a bit suspicious.
Now, imagine all the shenanigans when they try keeping a watch on Danny the Won't Die Guy.
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