#that we didn’t see as there are probably 10+ orders on the screen

[gatheryepens]

So I’m like 99.1% going to quit my job

[rkvriki]

GOT ME THINKING NONSENSE sim jaeyun ౨ৎ

synopsis! you get paired up with jake, your sweet classmate who’s always willing to help you, but while you’re both working, he seems to be the one needing help. wc! 5.1k cw! porn with barely no plot unprotected sex (wrap it up yall!!), SUB!JAKE, dom!reader obvi, oral (m! receiving), jake is whiny and reader is just a tad bit mean, unexpirienced but not virgin jake, had huge writers block in the beggining pls spare me 😣

BREAK THE SKIN MASTERLIST

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You could still feel the high heat in your body when you were walking away from your and Heeseng’s place. You probably didn’t look the most presentable, cheeks flush, hair a little bit tousled and your clothes were most likely all wrinkled from being messily thrown out. The walk from your apartment to Jake’s wasn’t longer than 10 minutes since he lived quite close. You checked your phone and it had been 6 minutes past the time you had planned with Jake so you tried to walk a little faster, ignoring the uncomfortable feeling between your legs, the aftermath of your and Heeseung’s sins.

You had met Jake during one of the classes you had together when one day you were late and the sit next to him was the only one available. He was the usual classmate who didn’t talk much but still had a good group friend, in which Heeseung was included. You two didn’t talk much unless when you ask him to help you with something and to you it almost looked as if he avoided talking to you. You often noticed how his cheeks warmed up when you talked to him or how his eyes flickered from yours to the environment around him, which you found cute and made you bite back a smirk each time you interacted. You would be lying if you said you didn’t find Jake attractive. His face looked like it could’ve been sculpted by the Gods above, and when he wore his glasses you swore you could drop all the dignity you had left for him.

It wasn’t too long after that you reached Jake’s apartment building. You took your phone out, texting him that you had reached his house. You didn’t have to wait long to see how good Jake looked today. Sporting basic jeans with a striped polo sweater and his usual black specs, he looked better than ever. Before your mind could wander any further, you walked towards the entrance, greeting him with a smile and following him upstairs and inside his apartment. When you first walked in, you noticed right away how neat his place looked, just like him.

“Nice place you got.” You said with a smile, making him look back at you with a surprised expression. “Oh? Thanks, though! I’m not very good at decorating but I tried my best here.” Jake answered with a shy chuckle. “Yeah, I could tell you did.”

He leads you further into the hallway, entering the door to his room. His room was a reflection of himself. Anyone could tell this was his room just from the way it’s organized and coordinated. The books on the shelves were all neatly placed and organised in alphabetic order. His desk was free of clutter and had only the necessary things placed above it, that, if you considered a picture of what you assumed was his dog necessary. Your eyes found Jake’s and you could see him tense up when you did so. 

“Shall we get to work then?” You asked with a smile. “Yeah, yes, of course.” He said quickly moving to sit by his desk. You put your things down and sat next to him, your thighs almost touching since the desk was clearly made for only one person to sit there. You pulled out your laptop and opened the document your teacher had sent you with all the instructions.

“I think we could divide the topics for each other and then discuss which information to keep..” Jake suggested, his eyes flickering between the various topics shown on the screen. “Yeah, I think that’s a good idea, Jakey.” The nickname slipped faster than you could catch, but you don’t regret it, especially after seeing how Jake’s ears slowly turned red. You bit your bottom lip to prevent the smirk threatening to form.

You had been working for a little past an hour and you could feel your eyes getting tired from looking at your computer screen for so long. From your peripheral vision, you could see Jake running a hand through his raven hair with a heavy sigh, making your eyes turn to look his way. With your head propped on your hand, you admired as he scrolled through endless reports, trying to find any good content he could for the presentation.

He hadn't noticed your staring, too focused on the screen ahead of him. Your eyes moved down his body. His sleeves had been pulled up a little, just below his elbows, showing off the veins that ran down to his hands. Oh, his hands. Something you always stared at. Anytime you would ask him for help in class you would always get distracted by the hands of the man beside you as he used them to point things out in your textbook. You would almost drool as you stared at his thick fingers, letting your mind wander further than it should.

Obviously, you didn’t keep these things for yourself. This had been a hot topic on your late-night calls with Yunjin, the one you would always run to when you needed feminine advice and didn’t want to hear the constant nagging Jay gave any time you talked about boys. The girl would always laugh at you, mentioning that you must have a thing for nerdy-looking guys or, in her words “pathetic men” (her theory got confirmed when you told her you fucked Heeseung). It wasn’t totally false. It is true that you liked weak men who wouldn’t hesitate to get on their knees for you. Blame you for being tired of guys with big egos who think they’re all that.

Another big sigh, almost groan, snapped you out of your thoughts. You looked at Jake and saw him leaning back in his chair with his eyes closed. “Everything alright?” You asked as you slid your chair closer to his. “Yeah, sorry. Just can’t find any good info for my topics.” He said as he nodded his head towards the screen in front of him. You let out a small sigh as your lips pout with pity, pulling your chair even closer to his. “Don’t be too harsh on yourself, Jakey.” You told him as your hand made its way to his thigh, feeling it tense at the touch. You leaned your body towards his way “You know you can always ask me for help.” our hand moves upwards “Anytime.” You finished with a smile, leaving that last word floating in the air with an uncertain meaning. Jake’s breath got stuck in his throat and he felt the weight of the last word that left your lips. The gears in his head twisted and turned as he tried not to show how the way you were smiling up at him affected him.

You sat back straight in your chair, acting as if you didn’t know what effect you left on him. “Let's ge back to work, yeah?”

It had been a few hours since you started working. During the whole time you could see Jake squirming in his seat, maybe from the tension in the air, so thick that it could be could with a knife. With a sigh, you closed your laptop with a thud, your hands falling to your lap as you turned to look at Jake who seemed to avoid looking you in the eye. 

“I guess this is all for today, Jakey.” You said smiling at him. “We can talk tomorrow in class and choose another day to meet again, maybe at my place next time, yeah?” You asked him as you started getting up from your seat, him doing the same. “Oh yeah, we can do that. I was about to finish this part as well so you’re all free to go.” You nodded at his words, your eyes subtly looking him up and down. His hands twitched in his sides. “I’ll walk you to the door.”

Reaching his door, he opened it to let you out. You looked back at him one last time with a slight smirk. His cheeks warmed up and he swayed in his place, suddenly feeling awkward in the loud silence. “I’ll see you tomorrow then.” You said, now fully smiling. “See you, y/n.” Jake said not moving from his spot. 

You walked away from his door, and as soon as you were out of sight, Jake moved to close the door, resting his back against it as he released a breath he didn’t know he was holding. He brought his cold hands to his cheeks, trying to heat them down. He knew working with you wasn’t going to be an easy task.

This cycle of going back and forth between each other’s houses has been going on for a few weeks now and the project was almost done. The thick tension between you two every time you were together was undeniable and it had Jake feeling tense around you.

Ever since you pulled that thing the first time you went to his house, Jake could seem to fully focus when he was around you, always getting distracted by whatever you did. Even during classes, you seemed to purposely sit next to him, only to spend half of the time subtly touching the side of his leg and moving up to touch his tight. Jake was going crazy from your shenanigans and they were the only thing running through his mind when he laid in bed wide awake, head full of you and his hand running down from his tummy to where his body needed him the most.

It’s not like Jake never had sex or related activities, but he wasn’t the most experienced. He had only had sex with his ex and only serious girlfriend he had and it wasn’t anything too out of this world. He knew you’ve had your fair share of sexual encounters, he knew you had plenty of experience and he knew you were damn good at it because he has heard stories from the men you were with. If you asked him a long time ago, this wouldn’t bother Jake, but now, with all you’ve been doing to him, it makes him feel a bit insecure, because if your teasing escalates further he knows he could never compete with those men. But maybe that’s not what you think.

You were waiting for Jake since he was coming over to finish and wrap up the project. You had spent a good two hours in front of the mirror, trying to make yourself look more presentable for him, something you would never admit to anyone even if they paid you. It wasn’t too late but you could see the sun setting from the view in your window. You were about to check your phone when you heard the doorbell ring, meaning Jake had already arrived.

Walking towards the front door, you checked yourself one last time in the mirror before opening the door. “Hey, Jake! Come on in!” You said stepping aside so he could enter your house. “Hey, um, I brought some snacks, since it’s getting kinda late and I remembered you said you liked these so…” He trailed off, showing you two packs of your favourite snacks, making you surprised he even remembered that. “Oh my god, Jake! You definitely didn’t have to. Thank you, though!” You said smiling at him, his cheeks warming up as usual. “Anyways, let’s get started before it gets too late for you.”

The project was going smoothly since today you two were only doing the final touches and reviewing the whole thing. The dynamic between you and Jake today felt different. There were more lingering touches coming from him who you would accidentally touch his hand but he wouldn’t move away or flinch like he usually does. You were surprised that he acting this way, but you were definitely not complaining, you like this less conserved side of him.

You tried to focus on the text on your screen, but you couldn't help but let your eyes drift off to where Jake was sitting working on the powerpoint. It’s not like he didn’t look good any other day, but maybe it was the dim warm light in your room or maybe it was the moon shining from your window behind him, you weren’t exactly sure, but something about him today had him look so good and you couldn’t avoid the warm sensation in the bottom of your tummy that made your thighs press together.

Your inner turmoil was interrupted by Jake’s little sigh, making your eyes focus back on him. “I’m finished with this.” he said turning to look at you. “Do you need any help with that or…?” he trailed off. “Oh! Um no, I’m finished as well.” a thought came up to your head. “Can I check the powerpoint?” you asked leaning a little towards him. “Ah, yes, of course.” He answered, adjusting his glasses.

You pushed your chair closer to his, purposely making your thigh touch his. Jake felt his heart race when you got suddenly so close, the scent of your sweet yet intoxicating perfume invading his senses. His eyes drifted from your focused face down to your exposed neck, making him lick his dry lips as if to stop himself from letting his lips fall into its soft skin. He shook his head, trying to shake the thoughts of you out of his mind and maintain his composure.

“Well, this looks pretty good!” you said smiling at him, almost missing the way his eyes quickly fall from your eyes to your lips. “Oh, really? Thank y-” “You did such a good job, Jakey.” You interrupted him, as you let your hand fall on his thigh. His lips opened and closed as he tried to speak but no words came out. “You worked so hard on this.” your hand started moving up and down, making him tense up. “Think you deserve a reward, don’t you?” his eyes doubled in size as you spoke so softly, yet your words were filled with nothing but lust.

“Answer me, Jake.” you said, leaning closer to his face. “I- Yeah, please.” he answered, voice barely above a whisper. Your lips immediately connected to his, making him let out a low moan. His lips felt soft against yours, fitting almost like two pieces of a puzzle connecting. Your hand moved further upwards, now dangerously close to where his bulge was growing. His wands that were awkwardly laid by his side moved to lay on your hips, gripping them when he felt your tongue swiping against his bottom lips. He gave you access and you started exploring his mouth, tongues rubbing against each other, making both of you moan at each other’s tastes. 

Kissing Jake felt heavenly, almost better than anyone you’ve kissed. It felt good to finally be the one leading. You felt so powerful with him writhing against you, yearning for more than just your kisses. You pulled away so both of you could catch your breath. Jake looked up at you, lidded eyes with a glow on them and his lips red and swollen from you biting on them occasionally. “Fuck, Jake. You look heavenly.” He only answered by chasing your lips, already missing the feeling of your lips on his. You pecked his lips before pulling away again, making him let out a whine. Your pussy throbbed at the sound, never had heard a man make such a beautiful sound, almost like a melody to you. 

“Let’s move to the bed, yeah?” you asked breathlessly, making him nod eagerly. Both of you stumbled as you got off from your chairs, almost bumping into each other. Jake was the first one to lay in your bed, head hitting your soft pillows. You followed him, crawling in his way, until your legs were straddling his lap, sitting on it. You leaned down, taking his lips on your again. The kiss was messy and heated, both of you probably getting coated in spit but neither could care any less about the mess. His bulge felt delicious as it grew harder and harder below you, rubbing against your clothed core.

You grinded experimentally against his clothed member to which he let out a groan, feeling the heavenly friction of you against him. You kept slowly and teasingly grinding against him as your hands ran down from his face to his chest stopping by his nipples that felt hard against your fingertips. You pressed on them, his hips bucking up as he let out a yelp, not expecting the sudden stimulation. You smirked against him, pulling away from the kiss, a string of spit connecting you both. Your hands left his nipples to pull at the bottom of his shirt, indulging him to take it off. You stared at his toned torso, not expecting to see the lines on his abs, something you would deal with later.

Your mouth made its way to his neck, starting by kissing all over until you found his sweet spot. Your hands started moving back up again to his nipples, rubbing them, making him whine again as he grinded harder against you. “Never had your nipples played like this, Jakey?” you asked, pulling away from his neck “Tell me, baby. Do you like it?” he had his eyes closed and his brows furrowed as he tried to think of what to say. “F-fuck yes” he stuttered “Feels so good!” he said with a whine, making you smirk at his already fucked out state. 

You lowered yourself, mouth moving to kiss from the dip in his chest, down to his abs, sucking on the area there, creating red marks all around. Your mouth kissed lower, following his happy trail until you reached the line of his pants. “Can I take this off, baby?” you asked him, pawing at the button. He nodded quicker than he would like to admit. “Need words, Jakey.” you demanded, wanting to hear him voice out his consent. “Yes, y/n, please, fuck”

With his green light, you started unbuttoning his pants and undoing the zipper. You tapped his hip, signalling him to raise them so you could take them off. He did as he was told and you pushed the jeans off, leaving him in just his boxers that already had a damp spot where the tip of his cock was. You stared at the bulge, already noticing that he was probably huge, making you feel a little nervous about fitting him in you. You squirmed in your spot, feeling an uncomfortable sticky feeling in your underwear, making you aware of how wet you were getting.

Jake whined, snapping you out of your thoughts, looking at you with eyes begging for you to touch him. You smiled at his helpless state “What d’you want, Jakey? Need you to speak or I won’t know.” He whined at your words, his brain feeling like a mush inside his head. “N-need you to touch it, please, just do something.” He answered, squirming in your bed as he felt more and more desperate. You didn’t say anything else as your hand moved to his bulge. Poor baby, was hard as a rock. It probably even hurt. You squeeze his length, pre cum escaping the tip and staining his boxers even more. “More, please! I need more,y/n!” he said with a whine. 

You took some pity on him and your hands automatically moved to remove his boxers from him, cock hitting his stomach with a bounce, Fuck, he really was huge, and thick. A long vein ran from the base to the tip and you wanted nothing more than to do that. You lowered your mouth on his cock, licking up from the base until you reached the tip, engulfing it with your lips. You licked a stripe on the slit, making him groan at the delicious but almost overstimulating feeling. Your mouth moved down, taking almost his whole length. One of your hands wrapped around what you couldn’t fit, while the other moved to play with his balls, his hips bucking inside you making you gag around him.

The vision Jake had of you ass up and face down on his cock was what he hoped heaven looked like. Your mouth felt warm and heavenly and he already felt brain fucked. He had never felt such pleasure in his life and he just knew this was gonna be the suck of his life. He dared to look down again and his eyes met yours. He could bust right there and then with just the look you gave him. Your eyes were dark, pupils blown out, making him feel so powerless underneath you. His eyes closed shut when he felt you hollowing your cheeks to suck him even harder.

You could tell he was close. His hips were twitching as well as his whole cock and you could feel him throb in your mouth. You removed his length out of your mouth and licked down to his balls, licking them as your hand moved to jerk him off at a quick pace. His breath was getting shorter as he felt his release come closer and closer. “Oh, f-fuck! Please, Please, y/n!” He didn’t even know what he was begging for, his whole body felt numb, except for the knot on his stomach getting tighter and tighter. 

Your lips moved to suck on his tip as your hand kept jerking him up and down. His cock started twitching hard in your grip “y/n I-I’m gonna cum-!” His warm cum spurt inside your mouth, making you moan at the feeling of him filling you up. He was moaning loudly as he rode out his orgasms, chest heaving up and down quickly as he tried to keep breathing. You gave him one last hard suck, making him shudder in overstimulation. 

You moved to eye level with him, hand moving up to brush his hair away from his face. “Such a good boy for me, yeah?” He nodded in your hold, face flushed and eyes teary from his orgasm. Your lips met his, tongues instantly meeting. He could taste himself on you, making him groan as the bitter taste touched his buds. You pulled away from the kiss, sitting on him fully clothed. Your hands pulled at the hem of your top, taking it off and leaving your torso naked as you weren’t wearing a bra. Jake’s mouth gaped as he stared at your bare chest, hands twitching at his side, wanting to touch them.

“You can touch them, Jakey.” you smiled sweetly at him, showing him you were comfortable with whatever he wanted to do. He let out a shaky breath as his hands hesitated to travel to your chest. He held your boobs in his hand, fitting them perfectly in his calloused hands. He didn’t really know what to do so you moved your hands to hold his, moving his thumbs to rub and twist your hardened nipples. You quietly moaned at the feeling of his rough fingers touching your sensitive buds. You removed your hands from his, letting him experience you by himself. He pinched on your nipples, making you yelp in surprise. “Sorry! I didn’t mean to hurt-” “Do it again.” you told him “W-What? Are you sure?” he asked hesitantly. “Yes, I liked it, Jakey. Was just surprised.” You answered, smiling at him.

His hands returned to your nipples pinching and rubbing them, making you clench around nothing. As much as you enjoyed the feeling you were getting impatient and needed to have him inside you as soon as possible. You grabbed his hands, taking them off of you as you stood up on the ground to take your bottoms off. You slowly pulled them down along with your panties. His eyes carefully watched as you stripped for him and him only.

You straddled him again, your pussy sitting right on top of his cock, making both of you moan at the feeling. Jake grabbed your hips up and sat against the headboard. “Wanted to have a better look at your face when you fuck me.” he said looking up at you with his puppy eyes. You were out of words so you cradled his face in your hands as you kissed him again. Your hips start moving as if on their own, rubbing our cunt against his length, making the tip bump against your clit. He whined inside your mouth as you swallowed his sounds. 

You pulled away, hoisting your hips up as your hand grabbed his length and aligned the tip to your entrance. “W-wait!” he suddenly said making you stop in your movements. “Everything ok?” you asked worried that he might have been uncomfortable. “No, I just- You weren’t prepped and-” your lips clashing against his interrupted him, making him let out a protesting sound. “Don’t worry bout that, Jakey.” You simply said as you grabbed his length again positioning it on your gaping hole.

You slowly sink on him, your mouth opening in a silent moan while he whines in your ear, hands moving to circle your waist. You bottomed down and stayed still for a while to adjust to his big and thick size. The only thing heard was both of your heavy breaths. His hands were comfortingly rubbing up and down your back. When you felt ready you moved your head to look at him. “Ready?” you asked him and he nodded eagerly at you.

You started by slowly circling your hips around his length, both of you moaning at the euphoric feeling. He rested his head against your shoulder, panting in your ear. You circled your arms around his neck as you started to pick up your face. The room was filled with the sound of skin hitting skin and the squelch coming from your pussy. “F-fuck, y/n! Never felt s-so good.” Jake whispered as he felt his eyes roll back at the feeling of your raw cunt moving on his hard cock. “Yeah? You’re filling me up so good, Jakey. Even let you go in me raw.” You grabbed his head to make him look at you. His eyes were low and he had drool almost dripping out of the corners of his open mouth.

You moved around him at a now stable pace, moaning loudly when the tip of cock found the spongy spot inside you. “F-fuck, Jake!” he was stretching you out so good, taking you to cloud 9. You looked back at him, his head leaning back on the headboard, completely fucked out. “Look at you.” you said making him open his eyes, barely keeping them from closing again. “Fucked you dumb, didn’t I?” he nodded even though you weren’t really looking for an answer. “Poor baby, just wanted to be a good boy for someone, isn’t that right, Jakey?” he whined at your words, knowing they were fully true so he nodded his head as his eyes got even more teary, one tear even dropping out. You laughed at his state, knowing he had nothing on his brain but your pussy. 

You felt the too-familiar pressure on your tummy starting to build up and his cock twitching again. You bottomed out on him again, grinding your hips down on him as you tried to reach your climax. “Oh God! I’m getting close, Jakey.” you said in a whiny moan” You’re gonna cum with me, yeah?” you felt his cock twitch harder inside you as he nodded at your question, wanting to fulfil your request. Your breath was getting laboured but you tried to maintain your composure for him. 

Jake could feel you clench around him, knowing you were almost reaching your high. He slowly moved his hand from your waist to where your bodies met, rubbing on your clit. You let out a surprised yelp as you squeezed hard against him, eyes widening at the unexpected contact. “F-Fuck, Jake!” you said breathing heavily. “You make me feel so good.” Both of your lips met, desperately trying to reach both of your releases. You grinded faster on him, now moaning in sync against each other mouths. His finger rubbed faster on your swallowed nub, making your head spin as you threw it back.

“J-Jakey, I’m so close!” you said as you felt your thighs burn from exhaustion. “Me too, f-fuck!” His hips started slightly bucking upwards, trying to match with your movements. Your synced movements had you moaning loudly, not even caring if you’re gonna get complaints from your neighbours later. The sound of Jake’s whines getting louder along with the frequent twitching of his cock indicated that he was just as close as you. You sped up your movements as you felt the knot in your tummy about to burst.

“J-Jake, I’m gonna cum! I’m gonna cu-” you were cut off by your orgasm, almost stopping in your movements with a silent scream. The feeling of your juices releasing against his cock had Jake cumming right after you with a loud whine. The aggressive twitching of his cock along with the feeling of his warm seeds painting your insides felt heavenly. You looked down to see a white ring form around his length, slowly moving up and down as you rode both of your orgasms out.

Your heads rested against each others’ shoulders as you stayed like that for a while, you with the feeling of his hands rubbing shapes on your back soothingly. The sound of both of your panting filled the silent room. The sound of traffic could also be heard from outside and it made you go back to your senses. You got your head up, urging Jake to do the same. You pulled him in one last kiss before you pulled his length out of you, making both of you hiss. You got up and walked towards the bathroom to grab a washcloth. You cleaned yourself up first before going back and cleaning his length for him. He shook from still being sensitive, making you chuckle at him.

You tossed the cloth onto the ground and laid next to him, sighing happily when your head hit the comfort of your pillows. Your hand rested on his chest rubbing circles on it as you simply looked at his peaceful state. The silence in the room wasn’t uncomfortable and you felt like you both made a silent rule of not talking about what happened. He grabbed your hand from his chest and gave it a kiss. “Thank you for taking care of me.” He said as he felt his cheeks warm up. You chuckle and prop your head on your hand to get a better view of him.

“Well, thank me when we get a good grade. This was my thanks in advance.” You said, making both of you laugh. “Yeah, maybe I’ll be the one rewarding you next time.”

[rapz-rites]

Eat

Damian Wayne x Platonic!Reader

You would do anything to look like the girls in the magazines… But at what cost?

A/N: This was requested by Anon. I’m actually on the skinnier side so I hope I do this justice. But I totally understand what it feels like to be ashamed of your body size, shape, and weight. I did pull ŵ from a clip of Skins where this girl with an ED showed her friend how she gets away with it. I’m trying to get these out so I’m gonna do 2-3 short parts 😁

Word Count: 1.1k

Warning(s): Cursing, ED, body checking, calorie counting

You were “larger” than most of the girls in your school. You were fine with that for the most part, but there were times when you were insecure about it. Especially lately.

You are in the school’s cafeteria “eating” with Damian. To Damian, you were rambling on about God knows what while the two of you were eating. For the most part, you looked the same. However, at the same time, you seemed different, but Damian just couldn’t place his finger on it.

“Hey,” you said, bringing Damian out of his trance, his eyes meeting yours.

“Are you going to eat that?” you asked, pointing at his cup of cucumber slices. Once he shook his head no, you took the initiative of taking the cup and dumping it in your salad. “I love cucumbers in my salad. Don’t you?”

Damian didn’t know how to answer that. Now when the two of you are eating together, you seem to talk a lot more. He watched as you mixed the cucumbers in with the rest of the ingredients of your salad.

Then, the bell rang, signaling the end of lunch. Damian watched as you stabbed your fork in the salad, taking a bite. Little did he know that was the only bite of food you had all lunch. You threw away your tray before Damian could see how little you ate.

This continued for a while. For an ex-assassin, you would think he would be more observant.

~

With your phone propped up on FaceTime using random stuff on your desk, you rummaged through your closet.

“Which outfit do you think is better?” You asked your best friend. You had an outfit in each hand. You knew which one looks better but you just wanted Damian to confirm it. You hoped you picked the one on the left. That outfit hides your figure the best, while also complimenting you.

“The left one obviously,” he said snarkily. He continued but you weren't paying attention to what he was saying. It wasn’t until he probably called your name 10 times you gave him your attention.

“Huh,” you muttered, turning your head to look at Damian through the screen.

“Were you not listening?” Damian huffed. This wasn’t like you. Usually in conversations, you hung to every word, but now it was as if you were on another planet.

“Sorry. What were you saying?” You asked. You were barely paying attention as you moved around your room.

“I asked if we are still going to that new ice cream shop this weekend,” Damian said. Stopping in your tracks, you looked at your phone to see Damian looking at you, waiting for an answer.

“Oh about that,” you started. “I actually don’t want to go anymore.”

Now Damian was confused.

“What? I’m confused. Your fat ass loves food. You never say no to food.”

You stop in your tracks hearing his words.

Fat ass…

Fat ass.

Fat…

Fat.

Fat!

FAT!

“I have to go,” you say. You swallow the lump in your throat as you hang up the phone on Damian, not allowing him to say anything else.

You started pacing back and forth as your mind raced with thoughts.

“Y/N! Mom said to come down for dinner!” Your sister called on the other side of your door. You lie saying you already ate and are not hungry.

~

You say right across from Damian, both looking at the menu. A waitress already came by your table to get your drinks and appetizer order. The entire time you couldn’t help but notice how slim and pretty she was, especially compared to you.

It wasn’t until Damian snapped his fingers in your face that you broke out of your trance of insecurity.

“Oh sorry,” you say slightly embarrassed. You order a water as your drink, which Damian found odd. You always got some type of lemonade drink when you two went out. He didn’t think too much of it as he ordered an appetizer for the two of you to share. You previously told him you wanted to start eating “healthier”.

As the both of you chatted you continued to look over the menu for your entree. You made a mental note of the lowest-calorie food in each category before making a decision. You were tempted to just pick the lowest calorie thing on the menu but you couldn’t risk making Damian suspicious of your new diet.

You start feeling sick at the sight of your food arriving. Your heart beats faster, your mouth starts drying, head spins. You pull yourself together, can’t have a breakdown now.

While attempting to do your signature eating-not-eating trick, you notice Damian paying a bit more attention to you. This caused you to eat more than you planned to.

After lunch, when Damian dropped you home you rushed in without even giving him a chance to say goodbye. You rush to your en suite bathroom. You pick a playlist and play it at max volume on a speaker.

“Y/N TURN IT DOWN!” Your sister yells, banging on the door, as you puke your lunch. A moment later the music stops. She yells a thank you through the door.

~

It’s been a week since you had lunch with Damian. It’s also been a week since you last ate a real meal, albeit you threw it up.

In Damian’s room, you’re both doing your homework (Damian is doing his homework while you scribble little nothings in your notebook while yapping).

“I’m going to get some water,” you declare as you start standing up. You run into Alfred who INSISTS on making you a snack. In the kitchen, you help Alfred put together a quick study break snack.

Back in the room, Damian was texting one of his classmates. He doesn’t entirely like him but he considers him one of the more tolerable students at GA.

Not Annoying Classmate: Hey Wayne 👋🏾

Do you have to do that worksheet for Ms Mijor?

Damian: No

I’m pretty sure Y/N does tho

Not Annoying Classmate: Can you ask her how she did it

I’m so confused 😭

Damian: She’s here now

I’ll check now and I’ll text you back

Not Annoying Classmate: Thanks 🙏🏾

At that moment. Damian decided to just go in your bag and get the worksheet himself. You've allowed him to before and never had a problem with it. While looking for the worksheet he finds something else.

“What’s this?” You hear Damian ask. You turn to see him holding a brochure and papers in hand.

Oh shit!

Taglist:

@devotedlyshadowytheorist

@firephoenix2020

IM BACK!!!!!

Sorry I’ve been gone for so long. Ik y���all missed me 😉

Also lmk if you ever want to get added to my Taglist!

[trumanbluee]

if its not with you - matty healy

minors dni !! this is 17+ nsfw material !!

please reblog if you like it! ᡣ𐭩

content: matty's away on tour, and you miss each other dearly

word count: 1.7k

warnings: phone sex! established relationship, afab oc, lmk if i missed anything! xx

a/n: hi!!!! im so sorry i havent been active at all recently i've been super busy with schoolwork, here's part one of a two part thing i wrote a little while ago !!! love u <3333

She stirred as she felt her phone vibrate on the bed beside her. Eyes still shut, sleep glueing them together, she blindly felt around the bed for it, gripping it with her freshly manicured hand once she’d found it. 

Opening her eyes, she screwed her eyebrows together at the brightness of the screen, before the furrow quickly dissipated when she saw who’d disturbed her nap. Matty ❤️ was sprawled out on the top of her screen in bright white, and behind it a picture of her kissing him on the cheek, taken on their first date. Sitting up in the bed, she didn’t hesitate to accept the call. 

Instantly, she heard a tired, “Hey baby,” ring out from the other side of the phone. She smiled as she pictured him in bed, rubbing his eye sleepily as he held his phone to his ear. 

“Hi Matty,” she whispered through the phone, positioning her pillows at the head of her bed so she could sit back. “Did you just get back to your hotel?” 

“Yeah,” she heard a soft exhale followed by a sharp intake of breath. “Long day.” 

Her heart sank at the exhaustion that was so evident in his voice, and she just wished she was there with him. 

He’d been touring for 6 months now, and had been away for far too long. She missed him dearly, and these phone calls, that lasted no longer than 10-15 minutes at best, simply weren’t enough. 

She huffed, repositioning herself against her pillows before placing her phone back to her ear, “I’m sorry baby, I know you said you’d call but we don’t have to if you’re too tired. Just want you to take care of yourself, Matty.” 

She heard him shuffling against his sheets, and hoped he was getting comfortable in order to fall asleep. She loved the calls where he’d fall asleep on facetime whilst she worked, her camera roll full of screenshots he didn’t know she had, of his soft, relaxed face. 

He tutted, “Never, baby. Always wanna hear your voice after a long day. Just wish you were here instead of me havin’ to call ‘ya.”

She sighed, “I know babe, I miss you so much. When are you coming home again?” she asked, sure of the answer but wanting to hear the excitement in his tone as he said it.

“Three weeks, honey. Three weeks and then I’m never leavin’ you again.”

She laughed softly, “Yeah, I’m sure Jamie, the fans and the lads’d be happy to hear that. I can see the headlines now, ‘The 1975 breaks up because Matty refuses to ever leave his girlfriend again.’

She hears him chuckle down the phone, low and gruff, obviously strained and exhausted from the long day of rehearsals and performing. 

“I just hope that picture I sent you’s enough to tide you over for another three weeks, hon.” She said cheekily, tracing a finger up the exposed skin of her thigh, where her shorts had ridden up. 

She heard his breathe hitch slightly, and she imagined all the nights when he’d really missed her, where he’d pulled that picture up, probably saved in his ‘Baby ❤️’ album knowing him, and, laying amongst the soft white of the hotel bedding, shoved his hand into his boxers and tugged at his throbbing cock needily, until he came all over his hand. The thought made her ache, and she felt heat pooling between her thighs. 

He laughed softly, “Yeah baby, it’s been getting me through the nights. You look so sexy honey, all dressed up in pretty lingerie for me.”

She whined softly, “Fuck, miss you, Matty. S’not the same without you here.”

“S’not the same? How’s it not the same, baby?” He asked cockily, knowing in which direction she was trying to steer the conversation. 

She huffed, “Y’know what I mean.” 

He laughed softly, repositioning himself to lie further down the bed. “Humour me babe, tell me what’s not the same.” 

Having discarded her pyjama shorts, she lay with her head on the pillows, tracing lazy patterns along the soft skin of her thighs and stomach. “Fingers can’t reach all the spots you do, Matty. Need you here to help.” 

He tutted in faux sadness, “Oh my poor baby, let me see if I can help you now, huh? Why don’t you lie down on the bed and spread your legs for me, sweetheart.”

She obeyed, hurriedly pulling her favourite pair of underwear, light blue, adorned with yellow daisies, down her thighs, using her right foot to fling them somewhere in the room. 

“You good, honey? Lyin’ down f’me?” he asked, making sure she’d done what he had told her to. 

She hummed a yes, waiting to be given her next instructions. 

“Want you to start by playing with your clit a little bit, okay baby?

She quickly put her phone on speaker, laying it on the pillow beside where her head was propped up, before she snaked a hand down her body, moaning softly as her index finger began rubbing soft circles on her throbbing clit. 

“Good girl.” He spoke, slightly breathless. She could just make out the sound of him unbuckling his belt, making her thighs clench at the thought of him stroking his thick length. 

“Actually, baby, can you prop your phone up somewhere I’ll be able to see you? Can you do that, honey? 

She nodded, though she knew he couldn’t see her, and opted to prop her laptop up against the end of her bed, receiving a facetime request from Matty mere seconds later. Pressing ‘accept’ in record time, she scrambled to resume her previous position, being sure to spread her legs as wide as she could, just to make sure Matty could see as much of her as possible. 

Drawing lazy circles on her clit, the facetime finally connected, and she was met with Matty’s tired face, though she couldn’t tell if his eyes were hooded from sheer sleepiness, or horniness. Every thought wiped from her brain when he registered what was on the screen in front of him, flashing her a wide grin at the sight of her spread-legged for him. 

“Oh honey, such a good girl for me, doing what I tell you when I can’t even see it.”

She nodded, feeling her cunt get stickier as he watched her actions, speeding up slightly. 

“God, you’re gonna be the death of me sweetheart… Pussy’s so fucking pretty. Think you can fuck yourself with your fingers f’me now baby? Yeah?” He asked, though the questions were rhetorical. They were both well aware she would do just about anything and everything that he asked her to.  

However, she nodded nonetheless, looking at his pretty face on the screen in front of her as she brought the hand that wasn’t occupied with her clit down to tease her hole, swirling her index finger around the entrance teasingly. 

“Fuck, baby. S’that feel good? Huh?” He asked, though he received only soft moans and needy whines of his name in response, as she finally pushed a singular digit into her now soaking cunt. 

He threw his head back, eyebrows screwing together as he swiped a thumb across the head of his cock, smearing the pre-cum down the vein that ran along his length. Giving it three quick pumps, he began to slowly slide his fist up and down at the same time she pressed her fingers, having added a second not long after the first, into her tight pussy, a squelching sound reverberating from his laptop and around his hotel room. 

“Fuck,” He said breathlessly, “Such a good girl, baby. Takin’ those fingers so well f’me. Miss you so much, wish I was there with you right now honey.” He rambled, fist pumping his cock quicker now, as she slammed her fingers into her hole, right hand rapidly swiping across her clit as you brought yourself closer and closer to her orgasm, with Matty coaching her through it. 

“M-matty, feels so good!” She stuttered out, head thrown back against her pillows as her orgasm got closer and closer. 

He groaned as he watched her, fighting the urge to squeeze his eyes shut in pleasure as he fisted his slick length. 

“C’mon baby, you - fuck, you’ve got it baby. Can you cum f’me? “He spoke, though he had to try his hardest to speak in a way that was understandable, eyebrows furrowing as his orgasm approached alongside hers. 

“F-fuck!” She moaned, legs clenching together around her hands as she came, body jolting. Almost as though the two are connected, Matty’s body tightens, and thick ropes of cum decorate his lower stomach as he groans loudly, head thrown back against his pillows. 

Silence filled both rooms, with nothing but heavy breathes from both sides of the room to fill it. Her chest rises rapidly, hair sticking to her forehead. She reaches down, still silent, and fishes her laptop from the bottom of the bed, placing it on the side of the bed that Matty would usually occupy. Turning on her side to face the computer, she sees that he’s had the same idea, and is now lying beneath the duvet, curls messy and out of place, hooded eyes staring back at her through the screen. 

She smiles sleepily, though it’s midday for her and night-time for him; her sleep schedule had been messed up by consequence of her trying to catch his shows via livestream. He smiles back, eyes lidded and eyebrows relaxed. 

“I love you, baby.” He says, eyebrows lifted, softening his fatigued features, before he smiles cheekily. “See, all you needed was a bit of help, huh honey?” 

This causes her to laugh softly, head turning into her pillow to muffle the sound. She shrugs the best she can in her position, “I love you too Matty. Would’ve been better with the real thing here though.”

His eyebrows furrow slightly at this, as if reminded of the fact that he’s looking at her through a screen, and she isn’t actually in his bed right now. 

“I know sweetheart, just three more weeks, yeah? We can do it, honey. We’ve gone this long.” Just then, he checks the time, mumbling a low “Shit”. “Sorry honey, I gotta go to sleep now. I love you, I’ll see you in three weeks.”

©trumanbluee - reblogs, comments, and likes are always appreciated! but i do not wish for my work to be republished, translated, or copied. thanks!

[callsign-muffin]

Heal Together: Chapter 3

(Bradley 'Rooster' Bradshaw fic)

I kinda want to make a playlist for this fic with all the music I mention in it. But I also work crazy hours and my writing time is my time to relax, so I don't know if I want to add something else on top of it if no one would care, ya know?

Masterlist

Word Count: 1.8k

“He started talking a little more last night.” Carly smiled after she finished giving you report, “He didn’t say much to me besides ‘thank you’ and asking for whatever he needed. Maybe you’ll be able to get more out of him, you guys seem to have really good rapport.”

“He responded very well to my sarcasm. Patient’s often don’t so it was a nice change.” You shrugged.

“Do you think he’s gonna be transferred to a step down unit?” She asked.

You nodded, “Yeah and I’ll miss him. It was nice having a patient I could actually interact with.”

Carly’s eyes widened, “What kind of ICU nurse are you? We love ‘em intubated and sedated.”

“A tired one!” You stated, “I need a few more sips of coffee and then let’s go sign off meds.”

█ ✪ █▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓█ ✪ █

Rooster was only slightly awake when Y/N and Carly entered the room to finish their morning sign off. They didn’t turn on the light, spoke in soft whispers, and used the glow of the computer screen as their light. He turned over groggily, as his vision cleared, he saw Y/N there. She looked so beautiful with her hair pulled back messily in a claw clip and her bright eyes quickly traveled back and forth as she compared the medications hanging on the IV pole with the computer. She moved about the space as if she owned it. Hell, with the way she’s helped Bradley the last 48 hours, she practically does own it.

“Good morning, Bradley.” She smiled down at him sweetly, “How ya feeling’?”

“Not too shabby.” His voice was still a bit raspy.

She feigned surprise, “Ah! He speaks!”

Rooster smiled up at her, “Soon you’ll be wishing I had that tube back down my throat to shut me up.”

She shook her head, “Never.”

“I see Carly removed your catheter last night.” Y/N inquired after finishing her head to toe assessment on Bradley.

He nodded, “About 2 hours ago at 5 in the morning. It was fucking awkward having someone 10 years younger than me touch my dick.” 

Y/N snorted trying to hold back a belly laugh, “I hate to break it to ya but that girl is more than 10 years younger than you.”

His face dropped in horror, “Holy shit, that’s a child!”

“She has the same license I do.” You shrugged, “She’s absolutely qualified to do what she does.”

“Unbelievable!” Rooster playfully rolled his eyes.

Y/N slightly pivoted the conversation, “You feel strong enough to get up and pee? Or do you need something to use while in bed?”

“Like a bottle?” He questioned.

She nodded, “We call it a bedside urinal but it’s the same idea.”

He nodded, “Yeah, I’ll try and get my ass up.”

“Good choice. You wanna try now?”

Bradley thought for a minute, “I mean… I probably should…”

“Alright champ, let’s do it nice and slow.” She moved his tray table out of the way.

He looked around, “Can you give a man get some privacy?”

“Not when you’re fresh off the vent. I’m not risking you falling ‘cause you have a shy bladder!” She rolled her eyes jokingly.

He grinned playfully, “Don’t go checking out my junk.”

“Already seen it and I wasn’t planning on doing it again.”

█ ✪ █▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓█ ✪ █

“Alright Lieutenant, looks like you’re cleared for transfer down to a medical observation floor.” A different older doctor from yesterday said with his posse of residents, “Glad to see you’re on the mend.”

“Me too, sir.” Bradley agreed.

The same resident from the day before, Carl Parks looked at you with disdain, “Nurse, I’ll get the transfer orders in when I can.”

“‘Preciate it, doc.” You fired back coolly. It was cute that he thought that he’d be able to get under your skin. 

They all exited and moved on to their next patient for rounds.

“What’s up his ass?” Rooster asked you.

You smirked, “The shame of being wrong.”

He gave you a questioning look.

“He didn’t think you were ready to get off the ventilator yesterday, I challenged him on it and the attending doctor took my side.” You explained, “Guys like him hate being wrong, their egos get bruised.”

He scoffed, “I don’t know how he’s smart enough to be a doctor if he was dumb enough to question you.”

“But what if this new unit sucks?” Bradley complained as you wheeled his bed down the hall and towards the elevator.

“All hospital units suck,” you scoffed, “Except for maybe labor and delivery.”

“I’m guessing my lack of vagina means I can’t go there.”

You stopped at the elevator and pressed the button, “You’d be correct.”

“Well shit.” He chuckled.

The elevator dinged and the doors opened; you carefully pushed the bed inside.

“This is a good thing,” you pressed the 3rd floor button, “the sooner you get out of the ICU, the closer you are to going home.”

Bradley sighed, “Yeah but… I’m going to miss you.”

“Really?” Butterflies began to flutter in your stomach. 

What the hell was that? You thought to yourself.

He nodded, “Yeah, you’re the first nurse that made me feel like a human being.”

You paused, taken aback by his words. “I don’t think you even understand how much it means to me to hear you say that.”

The elevator dinged again and the doors opened to your floor.

“I mean every word.” He said as you pushed him down the hall towards the medical observation unit, “You’re a good nurse— a great nurse.”

“Wow,” you stopped at the unit entrance and used your badge to open the doors, “Thank you so much for saying that.”

The nurse that was taking over Bradley’s care interrupted your conversation and helped you get his bed into the new room. You guys did your checks, you gave her a quick beside report, and you were good to go.

You looked at Bradley and sighed, “It was a pleasure taking care of you, Lt. Bradshaw. Keep getting better.”

He nodded and gave you a soft smile, “I will. Thank you for all you did for me.”

█ ✪ █▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓█ ✪ █

Two weeks later

It was Bradley’s first night out since before his deployment, it felt like a lifetime had gone by. He couldn’t wait to see all his friends at the Hard Deck and show them he was doing alright. The only one who’d seen him since he was med-evaced from the aircraft carrier was Phoenix. She was the one who picked him up from the hospital after discharge and took him home. He told her all about the angel nurse he met, how she bathed him and talked to him while he was intubated, how she was by his side to talk him through his extubation, how she made him laugh, and how he hasn’t stopped thinking about her.

“BRADSHAW,” Jake “Hangman” Seresin, his best frienemy, shouted across the bar from the pool table, “as I live and breathe!”

“We weren’t sure if he was living and breathing for a second back on the carrier.” Coyote quipped.

All the men greeted each other with big hugs and claps on the back. Despite their joking in the moment, those men were terrified that they were going to lose Rooster. Hangman was on the cot next to him in the infirmary as they were intubating him. It was a nightmare, to say the least.

“Glad you’re okay, buddy.” Bob said, “Let me buy you a drink.”

“Are you sure?” Bradley questioned, “But you don’t drink.”

Bob shook his head, “Doesn’t matter, I’m just so glad you’re here.”

Phoenix lovingly patted his cheek, “Awww Bob, you really are the best of all of us.”

“Truly.” Bradley agreed.

He could’ve sworn he was going crazy. He saw Y/N. Out of the corner of his eye, he saw her. But to be fair, he thought he saw her everywhere. She hadn’t left his mind since the day he met her. But this time he heard her voice and her laugh in the crowd. His eyes scanned the crowded bar for a familiar face. BINGO! There sh was, waiting for a drink at the bar. With a familiar young, little blonde. Was that Carly the child?!

“Go find yourself a cute sailor or something!” He heard her say over the loud music, “That’s what I’d do if I was young and hot!”

“Y/N, shut up! You’re only 28, you’re young and hot too!” The little blonde nudged her.

Wow, she was just as beautiful as he remembered her. Though she was a little more dressed up, she still had that same calm and caring demeanor that she had every time she walked into his room in the ICU. She was wearing a tight white T-shirt and faded jeans, effortlessly beautiful.

“Oh no you don’t!” She grabbed Carly’s wrist as she tried to slip her card to the bartender who just served them their drinks.

Carly ignored her and handed over the card, “Oh yes I do! You’ve helped me so much ever since you started, I feel like I’m actually getting the hang of this nurse thing with your help. Let me treat you!”

Y/N pouted, “Fine! But no more after this!  You need to save your money for fun and adventure!”

“Yes, ma’am!” Carly saluted her like an officer.

█ ✪ █▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓█ ✪ █

“Absolutely not,” You cried over the music at Carly and the other younger nurses that were with you at the Hard Deck.

“Absolutely yes!!!” Another young nurse, Madi handed you a tequila shot and a lime.

You groaned, “I’m too old for this!”

“NO YOU’RE NOT!” The girls chorused.

You looked down at the tiny glass, could your stomach even handle this anymore.

“Dooooooooo it!” Carly taunted evilly.

“Doooooooooooooooo it!” Sam echoed.

You groaned, “Ugh! Fine!” And you tossed the shot back like a champ, chasing it immediately with the lime. Your face contorted, “Oof it burns.”

All the girls cheered and threw their shots back together.

Suddenly the jukebox cut, making the room fall silent for a moment. Then a couple of chords slammed on a piano.

You shake my nerves and you rattle my brain

Too much love drives a man insane

You broke my will, but what a thrill

Goodness gracious, great balls of fire

Your head whipped around, wondering where the hell this piano was coming from.

“Holy shit.” Carly’s jaw dropped.

You looked in the same general direction Carly was, “Holy shit.”

“What?!” Madi asked over the loud music and singing. Many others had since joined in.

“That’s the patient Y/N fought Parks about extubating .” She explained.

You were still frozen.

“He’s kinda hot.” Sam giggled.

All you could choke out was, “That’s quite the mustache.”

Tag list:

@sarah-bear706318

Please message or comment if you'd like to be added to the tag list!

[sh4wty18]

heyyyyy i was wondering if you could make a johnnie angst fic where he forgets your bday🫶🏼

you forgot my birthday.

pairing: johnnie guilbert x reader

summary: same as request with some bestie!jake moments

cw: angst, hurt no comfort, language

word count: 1.2k + edited

---

12:00 am. A text from Jake immediately lights up your screen:

jakey: HAPPY BIRTHDAY Y/N!!!! i hope you have the best day ever! im so glad ur dating my bsf so WE could become bsfs!! ilysm go slay queen 💅

You smile and type out a response:

y/n: THANK U SO MUCH JAKE I <3 U!!!!! 

You put your phone on do not disturb for the night and roll over in bed, Johnnie hadn’t texted you for your birthday yet, but that was to be expected. He was a slow texter as it is, but he was usually busy streaming or playing music at this time anyway. There was still plenty of time for him to reach out.

10:36 am. You wake up and immediately check your texts. You’d received birthday messages from Carrington, Tara, your friends from home, been tagged in hundreds of posts on tiktok and instagram, even Matt texted you (and you’d only met him once!). But nothing from Johnnie. That’s okay. He was probably still asleep. Nothing to be worried about. 

1:48 pm. Nothing. What the fuck? All you wanted for your birthday was to spend a quiet day with your boyfriend. Unlike the other friends you’d made since moving to LA, you were less likely to choose partying over spending quality time with your loved ones. Not that there was anything wrong with partying, you just happened to be more reserved. Johnnie was more quiet and anxious as well, it was something that drew you to him in the first place. You always had someone to ditch social events with. You’d figured by this point he would have texted or called and wished you a happy birthday, then you’d hang out, watch a couple movies, order food in, birthday sex– the whole nine. But no. He'd said not a single word. You tried not to bring up your birthday often in the weeks leading up to it, so as to not annoy anyone, but you know for sure you’d mentioned your birth date at least twice since you’d been dating. He had zero excuse not to know. All the other important people in your life seemed to remember, so where was he?

5:24 pm. Nothing. 

7:58 pm. Nothing. You decide to call Jake and see if he has any insight into the situation. He picks up on the second ring.

“What’s up, birthday girl?” He asks sweetly. 

“Johnnie still hasn’t told me happy birthday. I think he forgot,” you say. Speaking the words out loud suddenly makes the situation feel way more real, and you feel a familiar lump forming in your throat.

“There’s no way. He couldn’t have. He’s been out all day, I haven’t really seen him. I think he’s doing a shoot for his next music video or something. So maybe he’ll text you when he’s done? I’m sorry, y/n, I wish I could help. If you need to be with someone, you know I’m always here.”

“Thanks, Jake, you’re a great friend. Love you.”

“Love you too, I’ll text you when he gets back.”

“Thanks. And Jake… don’t remind him when he gets back. It won’t be real unless he does it himself.” 

10:15 pm. Nothing. 

12:00 am. You type out a text to Johnnie:

y/n: you forgot my birthday

johnnie <3: It’s literally next month isn’t it?

johnnie <3: Y/n…plz tell me its next month 

y/n: i think i know my own birthday

johnnie <3: No no no no no

johnnie <3: Y/n im so sorry

johnnie <3: I know how u wanted to spend all day together on your birthday. I'm such an idiot. I promise it was an honest mistake. I really thought it was next month.

You don’t answer. At 12:43 am, you hear a knock at your door. He was the last person you wanted to see right now, but you knew he wouldn’t leave until you answered, so you reluctantly opened the door.

“Johnnie, I don’t want to see you–”

“Y/n, please. Please listen to me. I’m so so so sorry. I was busy with music video stuff and I spaced. I wasn’t on my phone all day so I swear, I didn’t see anyone’s birthday posts or anything until after you texted. You can ask Jake and Carrington, they were texting me all day and I never answered.”

“I believe you, Johnnie. And I get being busy, but… it’s just like… how do you forget your own girlfriend’s birthday? Do you know how embarrassing it is? To have all my friends, fans, and even acquaintances wish me a happy birthday, but the one person I really want to hear from doesn’t? It sucks. I felt like shit all day.” 

“I know. And being busy isn’t an excuse. There isn’t an excuse. I don’t know what else to say other than I’m so fucking sorry. If I could take it all back I would. I love you so much, y/n. I- I’m so fucking sorry,” Johnnie pleads, and his eyes start to well. 

You start to tear up as well, but you don’t want him to see you cry, don’t want to make him feel worse. You’re not angry with him, and you obviously still love him, you’re just sad. You can tell he means what he’s saying, it was definitely an honest mistake, but that doesn’t change the fact that you’re hurt, and embarrassed, and had the worst birthday ever. 

“I know you are. And I love you, too. I just… I think I need some space for tonight. I’m sorry, Johnnie,” you say.

“Don’t apologize, baby. I’ll call you in the morning. I love you.” He gives you a quick kiss on the cheek and turns to leave. 

You close the door behind him and sink to the floor. You pull your knees to your chest and bury your face in them, finally letting out your soft sobs after holding back tears all day. You pull your phone out of your back pocket and tap the call button under Jake’s name. 

“What’s wrong?” He asks immediately, knowing you’d never call this late unless there was an emergency.

“I need you,” you say, choking on your words between tears. 

“I’m coming over.” He hangs up.

—

Fifteen minutes later, he’s at your apartment. You’re sitting on the couch together, with you leaning your head against his shoulder and crying softly as he rubs your back.

“I saw Johnnie on my way out… he didn’t look so hot. I’m assuming this is about him?”

You sniffle, “He forgot. I can’t believe he really forgot. Sorry I'm crying, this is so stupid, I’m just… really fucking sad about it. I know he didn’t mean to, and he’s super sorry and stuff but–”

“Y/n, you don’t have to explain yourself to me. Your emotions are completely valid. He’s your boyfriend, of course you’re gonna be upset that he forgot your birthday! It doesn’t mean he’s a bad person, we still love Johnnie! But… he made a mistake and unfortunately it made you sad.” 

“I knew you’d understand,” you give him a weak smile, and he wraps his arm around your waist and pulls you into a tight side hug, resting his head on top of yours. 

“Of course. I’m here for you, y/n. Always.”

---

first hurt/no comfort fic in the books! (i'm sad)

[epicbuddieficrecs]

Weekly Recap | May 27th-June 2nd 2024

That finale sure was... something.... Can't wait for all the fix-it fics we're gonna get over the summer!!

Complete

the same damn thing that made my heart surrender by fleetinghearts/ @shitouttabuck (Crack, Getting Together | 1,5K | Teen): “Ever since that barbecue at Bobby and Athena’s last weekend I’ve been getting the weirdest targeted ads on my Insta,” he pouts, scrolling some more. On the screen is an ad for… a pale blue babydoll tee with the word BRAT screenprinted across the chest in curly pink letters. or, buck’s instagram algorithm is plaguing him with salacious clothing ads and eddie can’t be held responsible for playing Beefcake Barbie dress-up in his head about it

seeing you with him just don't feel right (you're giving me a heart attack) by bellabrady (Post-S7, Crack | 1,9K | Not Rated): Or: Buck and Eddie accidentally give their homophobic captain a heart attack.

stained by my mistakes by Tizniz/@tizniz (BTHB: Accidental Murder | 2K | General): Like an overslept mistake or killed a dude mistake? Under any other circumstances, Eddie would probably laugh at his best friend’s reply. But he’s not laughing. Not right now. He swallows the lump in his throat and stumbles over his reply. …the second option.

Everything you lose is a step you take by justhockey (Getting Together, Post-Lightning | 2K | General): For a while, when Buck would find himself about to float - about to slip into that space where he couldn’t believe he was still here, still breathing - he would need something to keep him steady. To keep both feet firmly planted on the ground. That’s how all of it started. Because it had been instinct, like it always has been with them, for Buck to reach for Eddie that very first time he felt like he was floating. And Eddie, like he always does, reached back. Through fire and trauma, under fire trucks, across blood-soaked asphalt - Buck and Eddie always reach for each other. It’s what they do. It’s who they are. They reach, and hold on, and they pull each other to safety.

that's the way love goes by heartbeatdiaz/ @loserdiaz (BuckTommy Break-up, Buddie Getting Together | 4K | Teen): Tommy thinks Buck and Eddie used to date and never really got over each other... he is very tired and confused. But it makes some feeling realizations come to light and a pair of idiots to see what they've been missing all along, so it's all good.

Sweet as Sugar by Tizniz/ @tizniz (BTHB: Chronic Illness | 8K | General): “There’s still something wrong with me.” “I don’t like that phrasing, but your labs did come back positive for something, yes.” Buck swallows, rubs his hands down his thighs, “Okay. What?” “Evan, you’re diabetic.”

What’s Your Order? by JJK/ @trenchcoatsandtimetravel (Post-S7E5, BuckTommy | 18K | Teen): 5 Times Buck Guessed Tommy’s Coffee Order + 1 Time He Didn’t Have To

🔥 a place we both know by not1_2write (A/B/O AU, Not A Firefighter!Buck | 42K | Mature): This whole thing is Bobby's fault. He's the one that suggested Eddie apply for the mate matching service, it was his idea to look for an Omega that would love and care for Christopher, to find a mate to be by Eddie's side. Eddie's gonna have to send him a fruit basket or something. It was the greatest idea Bobby's ever had and because of it they now they have Buck in their lives, in their pack and firmly nestled right in Eddie's heart.

WIP

🔥 stuck now so long, we just got the start wrong by Daffi_990_ao3/ @daffi-990 (Canon Divergent, Different First Meeting | 7/10 | 55K | Not Rated): Probational Firefighters Evan “Buck” Buckley and Eddie Diaz meet on a call which ends with them at odds with each other. As the months roll by, they keep running into each other on the job, much to Eddie’s dismay and Buck’s delight. Can they put aside their first opinions and misunderstandings and allow the seeds of friendship, and possibly something more, to take root?

🔥 like a bird stealing bread out from under your nose by Daisies_and_Briars/ @cal-daisies-and-briars (Post-S7, Fix-It | 2/7 | 6K | Mature): If you’d asked Eddie back in May what rock bottom looked like, it was his son leaving him. That felt like it; everything ruined so entirely that there was no way to ruin it further. There’s always more to lose.

🔥 Things We're All Too Young to Know by Daisies_and_Briar / @cal-daisies-and-briars (Canon S1-S6, Divergent Post-S6 | 128/? | 401K | Mature): This is a love story. Even if it doesn’t always look like it. Even if it doesn’t always feel like it. A look back on Eddie and Buck's lives up to now, and what led them to each other, interpreted from the current 9-1-1 canon.

🔥 Held Up a Lightning Rod (Wonder Why I'm Struck) by letmetellyouaboutmyfeels/ @letmetellyouaboutmyfeels (Not A Firefighter Eddie, Sugar Baby Buck | 3/22 | 14K | Explicit): When Eddie Diaz stumbles his way into money, he finds himself one of the most eligible bachelors in Los Angeles - to his dismay. He needs a way to get people off his back without confessing his messy marital situation, and Shannon's still not answering his calls, so he caves to a friend's suggestion: hire someone to pretend to be his partner. Enter Evan "Buck" Buckley: sugar baby, fire fighter, and the man about to turn Eddie's world upside down.

Podfic

🔥 [Podfic] Your Fingerprints Smeared on My Heart (Lead Me Back to You) by MistMarauder/ @mistmarauder for letmetellyouaboutmyfeels/ @letmetellyouaboutmyfeels (Cowboy AU, Reincarnation, Soulmates | 10-15h | Explicit): In 1880, Evan Buckley of the arriviste set is sent out west to oversee his family's railroad and recover from a broken heart - and meets Eddie Diaz, cowboy. When fate tears them apart, they make a promise: find each other again. In 2018, Buck walks into his fire station in Los Angeles - and meets Eddie Diaz, new recruit.

[ivanttakethis]

A STAR IS BORN: EXCLUSIVE INTERVIEW WITH “THE STAR OF SEASON 39” TOV

At the top of Season 39’s leaderboard with 77 points, Tov once again sat down with ALIEN STAGE MAGAZINE for an exclusive one-on-one interview!

————————————————————

Hi Tov, how have you been? I believe some congratulations are in order for your top score!

Tov: Thank you. I’ve been well. It’s nice to see you again.

So tell me, what was it like to earn the highest score of the season so far?

Tov: It was definitely unexpected. After Khoi won his round with 70 points, I was just hoping for somewhere in the top three or five. I didn’t think I would match his score, let alone surpass it. But I guess the audience really liked my performance.

When you saw your final score up on screen, what was going through your mind?

Tov: The shock is what hit me first. I was still trying to catch my breath from singing, so it took a minute for me to register what I was seeing. And then I just kept staring at the screen and thinking: “Is this real?” “Is that really my score?” I was so overwhelmed, I didn’t know if I wanted to laugh or cry.

Let’s talk about your last minute song change for Round 10. We’ve all been dying to know what led you to make the decision to switch so late. What was your thought process? Were there outside influences?

Tov: No, nothing like that. It was a personal choice. I lost someone very important to me in Round 7, and I wanted to honor him with my performance since he never got the chance to see me sing. But the song I originally chose didn’t feel right as a tribute.

I spent most of the time between Round 7 and Round 10 searching for the perfect piece, and only came upon Cosmic Love the night before. It fit so well that I did whatever it took to sing it, even if things were a bit rushed. I wouldn’t change anything about how the performance turned out.

Many are now calling you the “Star of Season 39”. How does that make you feel?

Tov: It’s an honor that people think so highly of my singing and I’m very grateful for their support. But now there’s also a lot of pressure to be as perfect as possible. I don’t want to disappoint anyone.

These next few questions come from some of your fans!

First up, BlueBluBleu asks: “Your outfit in your first round was so inspired! How do you plan your look before a performance? What goes into that?”

Tov: Thank you. My guardian would probably talk your ear off about our process. We started concept work on the outfits right after I was confirmed as a contestant for Season 39. I told Cassio that I wanted all of the designs to fit within the theme of stars and constellations. From there we went through several draft iterations trying to represent a different elements associated with that theme: stars, the night sky, the moon, meteor showers, things like that.

We also tried to incorporate the mood of the songs I planned to sing and the emotions I want to evoke in my performances in the fabric colors we chose. Everything we’ve done has been very intentional.

My first outfit was meant to resemble the night sky. So we started with a midnight blue dress as the sky itself, and then sewed on the diamonds as the stars. Cassio and I chose diamonds specifically so they would catch the lights and twinkle when I was on stage. It came together beautifully.

After I won Round 10, we got right back in the studio to work on my second round dress. It’s a different style from my previous one, but it is truly stunning and still fits my theme.

Next, a question from M00N: “Of the 13 remaining contestants, who are 3 you'd love to sing with and why?”

Tov: I’m very biased about this one, but I would love the opportunity to sing a duet with Himei. She’s one of my oldest friends and we haven’t sung together since our Anakt Garden days, so it’d be like stepping back in time and reliving simpler days. Our voices harmonize well together too. I think My Clematis would be a great song choice. It speaks to our relationship in a way.

I’m also biased on my second choice as it’s another close friend of mine. I’d love to sing with Nyx. He’s such a talented bassist and composer. It would be an honor to sing one of his original songs with him on stage. I’ve been wanting to for years now.

My last choice would be Cirrus. Their performance in Round 1 was absolutely captivating. Something about their voice has stuck with me, even through all of the subsequent rounds. It’s haunting, but in a good way. Great for songs with a slower tempo. I think I do well with slower songs too. Maybe we could do a ballad together?

And finally CastorKyo4Evr asks: “Which round so far, outside of your own, did you find the most inspired?”

Tov: I really enjoyed Round 4. It was our first duet of the season and it really got me thinking about all of the possibilities duets could bring to the table. There’s a lot of creativity and cooperation that goes into a joint performance and I found it very inspiring.

Himei and Min’s performance was also very high energy. The song choice played to both of their strengths so the audience got the best out of both of them. I think it really represented what ALIEN STAGE is all about: putting on the best show possible.

Since you scored the highest in Row 1, you’ll be the opening round for Row 2. Does that change anything for you, in comparison to your first round?

Tov: It does change things. The field is narrowing, which means the stakes will be higher. Lark didn’t have the chance to perform in Row 1, so he’s a bit of a wildcard to me. I’m not sure what to expect from him.

Then there’s also the added stress of being the opener. I must confess that I’m a bit nervous. But I’m sure Lark and I will both do our best to make Round 17 memorable for everyone.

What do you have planned for your next round? Will you still be singing for that important someone?

Tov: I’m always going to sing for him. But I’ll also be singing for other people who are important to me too. I hope they’ll be listening.

No hints on what’s to come. You will have to wait and see.

Tov returns to the stage with fellow contestant Lark in Round 17 of ALIEN STAGE Season 39!

————————————————————

This interview took place after Post Row 1 - Tov’s Log.

While Tov isn’t known for being overly talkative, Cassio taught her from a young age how to handle media and public relations matters.

She’s kind of like how Ivan was in his Outstanding Pupil Award interview, very good at coming across as pleasant and sociable.

Notice the difference between how Tov presents how things happened versus how they actually happened 👀

She knows she needs to spin this story and convince the AREPH that she’s not a threat.

The important people she planned to sing for in Round 17 were Nyx and Himei. But we all saw how that went…

Thank you to @lookatmysillies for the fan questions!

Khoi belongs to @junebluues.

Himei and Tallis (not mentioned by name, but we all know) belong to @lookatmysillies.

Nyx belongs to @rockwgooglyeyes.

Cirrus belongs to @yunoftheclouds.

Lark belongs to @kamersona.

[queer-irritator]

Padawan! Obi-wan Kenobi x Padawan! Reader Part 2

A/n: This is FINALLY part 2 to this ask from the lovely @projectdreamwalker! Thank you all for being so patient, life has really been wild! This has got a little bit of everything, it kinda goes off on a tangent but... that's how my brain works 🥴 So sorry if some parts are like "wtf is this doing in here??" We got some Anakin, Padme, Ahsoka, Rex and Maul screen time in this one, folks.

CW: So much, everything in ROTS, fluff, sadness, death

Never proofread as always 👍

Word Count: 4,287

The next 10 years were incredibly busy. Anakin was proving to be quite the handful and you had become a Master Jedi Investigator. You spent most of your time undercover in the lower levels of Coruscant keeping an eye on crime and ensuring the temple was free from threats. Unfortunately, being undercover meant having extremely limited contact with other Jedi. You mostly communicated via encrypted voice messages, but you did have the pleasure of going off-world once in a while and were able to see some old friends, including Obi-wan Kenobi. You even had a handful of missions with him over the years. He would never admit it, but he looked forward to working with you the most, despite the antics you and Anakin would get up to. The two of you were quite the pair at getting under Obi-wan’s skin and testing his patience. When the Clone Wars began, you were stationed back at the Jedi temple on Coruscant. 

You received a message informing you of the Battle of Geonosis and the clone trooper army appearing seemingly out of thin air, and orders to return to aid in the ongoing war against the Separatists. That had been about a week ago, you had been traveling across the galaxy in the meantime. It was mid-day when you landed on Coruscant. You stepped off your ship, squinting from the sun with your R4 droid trailing behind you. It had been quite a while since you were last on the upper levels, probably about 6 rotations; but things didn’t seem to have changed much. 

“Welcome, Master (y/n). I am C-3PO, human-cyborg relations. The Jedi have been incredibly busy, so I will be escorting you to your quarters.” A gold droid, C-3PO, introduced himself and began to lead you inside.

“Thank you. I guess you already know me, this is R4.” You gestured to your droid, following close behind him. “Is Obi-wan here..?” 

“Oh! You know Master Kenobi? He has been in meetings all morning with his clone army commander. He has taken on the position of General in these trying times.” He explained.

“Wow, he always was a high achiever.” You thought aloud. 

C-3PO stopped in front of a door, “Here you are. Master Kenobi has a room down the hall from here as well. Please do let me know if you require anything.”

“I will, thank you.” You said as you entered your room. 

You looked around as you heard the remanence of the droid’s conversation. 

“Come now, R4. I will get you cleaned up.”

You set a small bag you had brought with your down on the bed. You had been sitting all day, really all week, so you weren’t too keen on settling in quite yet. Besides, you couldn’t sit still knowing Obi-wan was so close to you again. After giving yourself a quick look-over in the mirror, you exited your room and headed towards the center of the Jedi temple. 

You stopped multiple times to catch up with old friends and mentors you hadn’t seen since you went undercover. Just as you had said good-bye to someone else, you turned to see Obi-wan standing with his hand resting on his beard and his eyebrows drawn together as he was deep in thought, looking down at a holo-map. You couldn’t help the smile that spread across your face as you took him in. Still as handsome as ever, but he seemed wiser now, more focused. That seemed to happen each time you saw him, he was always sharpening his skills. 

Obi wan’s gaze broke from the map and shifted to you. There’s no doubt he could feel someone’s eyes staring him down. When he made eye contact with you his stoic demeanor dropped. His eyebrows raised and his mouth parted slightly in surprise. Then he once again furrowed his eyebrows, as to ensure he wasn’t imagining things. He called your name as he started to walk toward you. 

“Is that really you?” A smile was spreading across his cheeks as he got closer.

“It’s me.” You confirmed, closing the gap between the both of you and enveloping him in the tightest squeeze you could, “I missed you so much.”

He returned your enthusiasm with an equally tight hug. 

“I missed you too, darling.” he whispered in your ear. 

You breathed in his scent as you lingered in his arms, if only you two were alone. It was almost insufferable how badly you wanted to kiss him and just stare at him for hours. 

Obi-wan let out a chuckle, his breath tickling your ear, “Mind your thoughts. We are in a building full of Jedi.”

You blushed and playfully pushed him away, breaking your hug, “Oh, shut up.” 

But you knew he was right. You hadn’t been around other Jedi in a decade so you weren’t used to controlling your thoughts or feelings as much as you should. You looked him over and gently placed your hand on his cheek.

“You look good, Obi.” You smiled and dropped your hand back to your side.

“So do you.” He said as his eyes flicked between your eyes and your mouth. 

“There you are, Master. You’re late for our meeting.” A familiar voice burst the bubble the two of you had been enveloped in.

“I was on my way.” Obi-wan began to defend himself as he spun around. 

“Anakin?” You questioned, seeing the man before you. He certainly wasn’t a padawan any longer. 

Anakin looked past Obi-wan to see you and a smirk crept onto his face, “Oh I see. I’m sorry if I was interrupting anything.” 

“Come here.” You rolled your eyes and gave him a hug, “You been keeping Obi-wan in line?”

He chuckled and hugged you back, “Always.” 

You let go of him, “Good, good.” 

Before you could begin scheming with Anakin about ways to annoy Obi-wan, he placed his hand in the middle of your back, beginning to lead you as he walked, “Why don’t you join us in the meeting? We can catch you up on what you’ve missed.”

You nodded and followed his lead. And there was definitely a lot to catch up on.

Your role in the clone wars was to assist any teams that needed an extra hand, mostly on stealth missions as it was your specialty. After sitting through meeting, after meeting, you finally had some time to be alone with Obi-wan later that night. The moment he had shut the door to his room behind him, you were on his lips. The two of you muttered endless ‘I missed you’s and compliments to each other. You particularly let him know how hot he was with a full beard. That night was passionate, needy, and sloppy. Everything the two of you needed it to be after not seeing each other for so long. 

However, the next day you were diving head first into the chaos of war. There was almost no time to breathe with all the moves the Separatists were making. There were moments to catch up with Obi-wan between battles and meetings, but one of you were always on the move to your next objective. The next time you had any substantial quality time with him was after Satine died. Obi-wan needed your support. He needed a sound voice in his head to keep him sane. Something to quiet all the hatred, anger, and guilt he felt. 

You were sitting on the edge of Obi-wan’s bed with your hand gently rubbing circles on his back, doing whatever you could to soothe him.

“He’s taken everything from me.” Obi-wan had his elbows resting on his knees, his back hunched and his head hanging low. 

“I’m so sorry.” You spoke in a hushed, gentle tone. “He’s not worth taking up space in your mind. The balance of the force will come back around, he will pay for what he’s done.”

“I know it’s wrong… But I want to make him pay myself.” Obi-wan’s hands tightened into a fist against his pants. “I want to kill him.”

You could feel your heart cracking and aching for the man besides you. You’ve always known him to detest violence, only resorting to it when there was absolutely no other choice. 

“These feelings and your anger are natural, Obi. We will get through this, together.” You assured him. 

“I just can’t believe she is truly gone…” His voice trailed off, he was silent for a few moments before you felt his body begin to shake and the sounds of his sobs were filling the room. 

You pulled his body closer to you and gently laid down on the bed with him. You were laying so you were facing each other and you had an arm wrapped around Obi-wan. He had curled up his body to a fetal position and held your hand that wasn’t rubbing his back. The two of you stayed like that all night. Eventually Obi-wan’s breaths had evened out and he had fallen asleep. But you stayed up almost the whole night, watching over him. Thinking of anything you could do to lessen how bad he was hurting. 

You two had also spent the next day together. Taking things easy, watching cheesy movies like when you were padawans, and trying to convince Obi-wan to eat. Despite his tragic loss, in a few days he was getting back to his normal self. 

“You can stop worrying about me, you know.” Obi-wan spoke, his back turned to you while he poured a cup of caf in a small cafe area just outside the main mess hall.

You had been watching him like a hawk from the table you sat at, worried that any reminded or mention of Satine will have him crumble to the floor. But you also knew how strong he was, arguably the wisest Jedi Master and one of the top Generals in the war. 

You sighed, “I can’t help it. You know you’d be doing the same thing if you were in my shoes.” 

Obi-wan walked over to you and placed a mug down in front of you as he sipped his own, “I can’t argue with that.” 

You smiled up at him, though your sadness for him was transparent. You thanked him for the beverage and took a sip. 

There had been a thought stewing in your mind, festering and bringing on so much guilt. As hard as you tried to hide it, Obi-wan knew something was going on. 

“What’s on your mind, darling?” Obi-wan asked as he sat down across from you. 

You looked into his eyes, “I just… I know how much you loved her.” You winced as the words tumbled out of your mouth. This was not the right time to talk about the love triangle that was between you, Obi-wan, and Satine. 

Obi-wan reached out and took your hands in his and gave you a soft smile, “I did love her. But… it wouldn’t have worked for us. Even if she were still here, we led two very different lives and had pledged our lives to different causes.”

You nodded slightly, “I’m sorry, I shouldn’t be bringing this up right now.” 

“Don’t be. Loss brings up many emotions.” He brought your hand up to his lips and gave it a soft kiss before letting go. 

Just then, Anakin walked into the room. Luckily it was just after Obi-wan had let your hands go. 

“Alright, we gotta get a move on. I so graciously got us all on a mission together.” Anakin announced, hands on his hips and feeling obviously proud of himself. 

You exchanged a glance with Obi-wan before getting up and embarking on your next adventure. 

The war trudged on for about half a rotation longer, then something in the tides seemed to change. Anakin was growing alarmingly closer with the Chancellor each day and the Jedi council was not happy about it. Obi-wan was just assigned to defeat Grievous on Utapatu while you had just received a message from Ahsoka requesting back-up on Mandalore.

Obi-wan and you had gotten into a habit of taking turns sleeping in each other's rooms whenever you had downtime at the Jedi Temple. When you two would be on missions together you would share a room for “safety”. There had been a few times when you two had been sharing Obi-wan’s bed that Anakin would barge in and you would throw the excuse of falling asleep while discussing work in his face. Anakain would usually roll his eyes and mumble a ‘sure’ or ‘yeah, right’ before impatiently waiting outside the room for Obi-wan to collect himself. 

That’s where you were at the moment, stuffing a few items into a bag before rushing off, and Obi-wan was doing the same but not as hastily as you. This was the most anxious you felt for a mission in a long time. You were going to have the chance to help capture Maul. 

You closed your bag and triple-checked off your mental list. You were only torn from your thoughts and anxiety when you felt Obi-wan’s hand on your shoulder. 

“You’re shaking, darling.” he squeezed your joint lightly.

You shifted your attention fully towards him, “This is a big fucking deal… I’m scared.” 

Obi-wan gave you a sympathetic smile, “You and Ahsoka will do what is needed. I have complete faith in you both. There’s no one I would trust more to this task.” 

You reciprocated his smile and leaned your cheek against his hand, “Thank you.” 

You took a few deep breaths to calm your mind and body, letting the words sink in. Having regained some confidence, you moved to stand in front of Obi-wan and placed a kiss on his lips. He happily returned the gesture and moved his hands to your waist. 

You reluctantly pulled away from him after a few moments and rested your palm against his cheek, “Stay safe, Obi-wan. I’ll see you when we get back.” 

“You too. May the force be with you.” He placed a final kiss to your forehead. 

“And with you.” You bowed slightly to him before walking out of the room to hurry onto the last ship of reinforcements that was leaving for Mandalore.

-

You couldn’t believe your eyes as you were dangling from a steel beam. Maul had finally been captured, Ahsoka had got him. You used the last bit of strength to pull yourself up as there was a stun blast sent directly to Maul and he fell unconscious, wrapped in cords by the clone troopers. 

In between pants to catch your breath, you looked to Ahsoka who was standing on the steel beam across from you, “You did it.” 

She turned her head to you, “No. We did.” 

She graciously hopped over to you and helped you into one of the ships that had just flown up. The battle had taken all day and night, you just needed to oversee the transfer of Maul and make contact with the Jedi council. 

While Ahsoka spoke with Master Windu and Master Yoda, you mostly stayed quiet, as it was her mission that led to the successful capture. You had a glimmer of hope that perhaps Ahsoka would come back to the Order after the mission, but that hope was dashed when she referred to herself as a citizen. 

It was midday when you said your goodbyes to the Mandalorians and headed back to the command ship.

It was midday when everything went horribly wrong. 

It hadn’t been long since you jumped into hyperspace when the clone troopers turned on you and Ahsoka. The two of you got separated almost right away and it wasn’t until you nearly took her head off in the medical bay that you got reunited. Ahoska quickly got you up to speed on the theory of the clones’ inhibitor chip and that she had let Maul go to create a distraction. 

“You let him go?? Willingly?” You could see her way of thinking, but it was devastating to hear. 

“I know, I know. But it was the only thing I could do to give us a fighting chance.” She explained as numerous droids began to run tests on the unconscious Rex laying before you. 

When you took a moment to think about the last few minutes, it wasn’t until you heard loads of gunfire and clone troopers yelling commands in the distance for you to be able to kill the clones that had cornered you and then managed to escape to the med bay. You had a close call, a blaster shot grazed your side and you had been tending to your wound when you heard someone approaching the door. 

“Thank you.” You spoke softly, looking to Ahsoka once again, “You did what needed to be done.” 

“Don’t thank me until we get off this ship alive…” She muttered and took over locating the inhibitor chip in Rex. 

Once the chip was successfully taken out of Rex, the three of you devised a quick game plan on how to survive at least one more day. 

It took a lot of close calls, some skill, and a little luck, but you, Rex and Ahsoka were able to make it off the ship and away from the clone troopers. 

The three of you had only caught your breath for about 10 minutes before you piped up, “I need to go back to the Jedi Temple on Coruscant.” 

“What? Are you crazy? We just escaped one war zone and you wanna go to another?” Rex turned to look at you in bewilderment. 

“I agree with Rex. It’s too dangerous, we need to find somewhere to lay low.” Ahsoka supported the clone’s notion. 

“You two can. I can’t… I have to find Obi-wan.” You explained, a bit in your stomach began to grow as you realized there was a good chance he didn’t make it. You and Ahsoka both felt the massive amount of loss and darkness when the clones turned. 

Ahsoka called your name, bringing you out of the dark thoughts, “I want to find him too, but…” She stopped herself, seeing the hurt on your face. She didn’t have to finish her sentence, you both knew the grim reality of the situation. 

You took in a breath and forced the next words out of your mouth as sternly as you could manage, “I have to find him, Ahsoka. I love him.” 

Ahsoka could only look at you with pity and hurt, knowing there was nothing she could say to stop you. 

Rex glanced at you out of the corner of his eye. He may have been bred and programmed for war, but even he knew the kind of love you meant was more than a friend. 

“Please.” Your voice broke, strength and stoicism failing you. You didn’t have the energy to hide your feelings anymore. Ahsoka sighed in defeat, “Okay. We’ll find a system nearby safe enough to stop at. Then you can take the ship. Rex and I will make our own way from there.” 

You nodded and tried to relax in your seat for the rest of the ride. 

-

You were on your way to Coruscant, in hyper-space when an encrypted message came on your comlink. It was a warning for any remaining Jedi to stay clear of the Temple. You knew it had to be Obi-wan’s doing. He’s the only fool brave enough to walk into a trap just to warn others. You hadn’t been able to contact anyone when you were aboard the ship, fighting for your life. You decided to try one more time. 

You put out your encrypted distress call to all Jedi frequencies, and a separate one to Obi-wan, Anakin, and Padme’s personal comlinks. Sitting with the dead silence of space was becoming more unsettling with each passing moment. Just when you had lifted your finger to shut off your distress signal, a distorted crackling came over the radio from Padme’s comlink.

“Hello? Padme? Can you hear me? Are you and Anakin okay? Have you seen Obi-wan??” You hurled rapid fire questions at the static filling your cockpit. You held your breath waiting to hear a reply. 

“Darling? Darling, it’s me.” Obi-wan’s voice came over the static.

You let out a cry of relief and disbelief, “Obi-wan?? Is that really you? You survived?” 

“Yes… I have a lot to explain, but I’m sending you coordinates. Get here as soon as you can, it’s not safe to talk on here for too long. But, I’m glad you’re safe.” He audibly sighed in relief

The coordinates popped up on your computer screen, “I got them. Ahsoka is safe too, we managed to help Rex as well. I… I love you, Obi. See you soon.”

“That’s good to hear… I love you too.” he replied before the connection was severed. 

-

You arrived on Polis Massa just as the twins were born. You ran inside to the medical center, escorted by a droid where you saw Padme’s lifeless body on an operating table and Obi-wan holding a newborn baby boy. Master Yoda began to bring you up to speed on what became of Anakin Skywalker, and the duel on Mustafar. 

As you sat in a sterile white command room on a new ship, listening to Master Yoda, Bail Organa, and Obi-wan discuss the next steps you should take, the world seemed surreal. “Listening” is actually a strong word, it was more like you could hear the hum of talking but you weren’t taking any words in. Everything you had ever known had fallen apart. It wasn’t until a gentle hand placed on your cheek drew you back into reality. 

The room was empty now, with just you and Obi-wan left to yourselves. You turned your head to the man next to you. 

“Anakin…” You mumbled, still in disbelief. 

“I know.” Obi-wan answered you without you needing to say another word. He dropped his hand from your face and stared at the table in front of him. 

“It was all for nothing.” He stated

“What was?” You questioned, brows furrowing in confusion. 

“Everything.” He lifted his head to look into your eyes, his own filled with tears. “Qui-gon and Satine died for nothing. Dedicating my entire life to a code that now ceases to exist. And depriving myself of you.” 

You were speechless, not even a thought could form in your mind. 

“Come with me.” He continued, “To Tatooine, we can be together and watch over Luke.” He took your hands in his, giving them a slight squeeze. 

You nodded, “Of course, all I’ve ever needed was you, Obi. You’re all I’ve ever wanted.”

A small smile formed on your lips, and Obi-wan matched it. He gently pressed his forehead against yours.

“I’m sorry it took so long, that it took all of this for me to realize what I truly wanted.” He began to apologize, but you started to shake your head slightly.

“It wasn’t just you. And we made it. We’re here now.” You reassured him, and sealed it with a deep kiss you poured all your love into. 

He returned your enthusiasm and pulled you onto his lap to bring your bodies closer together. The two of you stayed in that room, sharing sloppy love filled kisses for what felt like hours. You had to make up for lost time somehow. You made mental notes of how his lips felt against yours, how he tasted, the way his beard and mustache tickled your face. You never wanted to forget this moment. 

You swore you could have stayed on top of him for eternity, but the jolt of the ship switching into its landing sequence interrupted you. Reluctantly climbing out of Obi-wan’s lap, you took a moment to take in his messy hair and swollen lips.

“Only you could make me horny on the worst day of my life, Kenobi.” You chuckled slightly and brushed your fingers through your hair. 

“Well, I could say the same thing about you.” He bantered, following your motions and fixing his own hair. 

The two of you quickly boarded a different ship once the current one had landed on Naboo. The three of you were now in hiding. Everything you grew up with, your morals, values, your way of life now had to be kept secret to ensure your survival. Obi-wan had barely set down the baby, Luke. You could sense how much the child meant to him, he and his sister are all that remains of Anakin and Padme. You sat in the cockpit and took off, setting the course for Tatooine, where Anakin had some family that would take in Luke while you and Obi-wan silently watched over him. 

After arriving on the desert planet and an uncomfortably long ride on an eopie, you could see the lights of moisture vaporators come into view. You unraveled your arms from around Obi-wan’s waist as the creature laid down for him to dismount. He carefully swung his leg over to the side and stepped onto the dusty earth. 

You reached out your hand to gently take the baby’s smaller one, “Goodbye, Luke. Stay out of trouble.” 

You let go of the child and Obi-wan walked over to Owen and Beru who had just emerged from their home. He carefully handled Luke, swaddled in a soft white blanket to Beru. She smiled at him before walking over to her husband, who was watching the suns set. 

When Obi-wan had made his way back to you and the eopie, he silently got on the animal and started to head toward the Jundland Wastes. It would become your new home while you quietly watched over Luke from a distance. 

~Fin~

[wooahaeruby]

Chapter 10: Don't Talk About Fight Club

Chapter Word Count: 4,439

TW

No trigger warnings this chapter! ANY LARGER ITALIC SECTIONS ARE FLASHBACKS!

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It was a bad idea. That’s all that was running through his head. 

When Seokmin brought her in as some other inside intelligence, he’d never thought any of them, especially Jeonghan, would take such an interest in her. It gave him anxiety to have an outsider so close to the people he loved, someone that now knew where they lived, their names, and probably much more. 

Though Wonwoo said that she was clean and didn't spread information based on her online activities, it didn’t fully ease his apprehension. Mouse was too close, or at least he thought that. There were records that were redacted from a police station in a middle of nowhere small town, a legal change of name, and no bigger records outside of that. When he asked Wonwoo to dig further, even the computer geek was having a hard time finding anything. She moved when she was eighteen to the city for college and never left since. She stayed top of many of her classes, had no arrest, no drug issues, and not even an infraction with her landlord that she rented under since living on her own.

Now she was sitting with his family, watching Wonwoo’s fight in Jeonghan’s underground club. Mouse didn’t look scared, he thought she looked more excited now that she was comfortable sitting between Soonyoung and Seokmin, but the pit in his stomach wouldn’t settle. 

“He’s a good fighter.” He heard Seokmin speak, “ Fenris trains him and makes sure he is always ready.” 

Seungcheol peered over, turning his head the slightest bit to better see them but not enough to catch any of the three’s attention. 

Mouse had sat back, taking in Seokmin’s word but her eyes never left the two men in the ring. “I’d never believe that he would be fighting in a ring.” She snickered. “Same college personality but such a different person.” 

Seokmin had rested his arm across the back of the couch and Soonyoung was leaning close to Mouse, whispering something he couldn’t hear over the crowd. She laughed and hit his thigh, covering her mouth with her other hand. 

He could see why Seokmin trusted her. So far she had been obedient to his orders from their first meetings. She had a mouth that could bite back but seemed to know when to settle down, earlier might have been an exception. Even he was someone that didn’t enjoy being spoken about like he wasn’t there. The tone she spoke with when she said it also didn’t seem like she wanted to sound so agitated but it came out nonetheless. 

Each time she was in his presence too, she was posed and mischievous, much like Jeonghan and Joshua when they were comfortable. He understood why some of the guys liked her. She wasn’t one to back down. Seungcheol was more worried just how close they were getting, especially after last night.

“Where have you been?” He asked when Jeonghan entered the house later than usual. Seungcheol had been working on documents for the shipping company before tucking in for the night. 

“Out.” Jeonghan replied smoothly, “I took it upon myself to take Mouse dress shopping for the Gala. I needed to figure out what she preferred before designs were started and a gown was made.” 

“And that took,” He looked down at his phone screen, “Five hours?” 

“We went for dinner since she was kind enough to entertain me.” 

Seungcheol pinched the bridge of his nose then rubbed that same hand over his face, calming his irritation. It was enough that Seokmin was so close to her, but with Jeonghan’s growing interest, he has barely slept from overthinking. Not even sleeping meds were really helping the sleepless nights. 

“Han, you should keep your distance from her. We are using her for information gathering and keeping the feds off of us. You shouldn’t be,” He waved his hand in the air to find the right word, “Pampering her.” 

The other stopped at the other end of the table, hands bracing his weight, looking down towards his friend. Jeonghan didn’t look too appreciative of his words. Seungcheol and him usually weren’t one to fight, more often than not they agreed on many things that pertained to the groups safety. 

“Seungcheol,” Jeonghan almost never used his full name. “It was both your idea and Seokmin’s to let her be brought into our lives. You agreed to let her come to our home, go into Pandora, work a double life like Seokmin, and much more. You signed off on everything.” 

“That doesn’t mean-” 

“Whether you like it or not, Seungcheol, I enjoy her company. It’s one of the most brightening times of my week when she replies to me, when Seokmin brings her to the house, when she entertains me.” There was something in Jeonghan’s voice that he had never heard before. “Mouse is witty and funny to tease. She doesn’t mind throwing insults back that mean nothing. She isn’t afraid to speak up for herself against you and she isn’t scared of us. Mouse is a genuine person that I believe will not hurt us, Seungcheol. She has proven that for weeks and I know you have Wonwoo keeping tabs on her.” 

Jeonghan was staring him down across the table. Seungcheol had dropped the papers he was reviewing and listened to him, unmoving. He took slow deep breaths to keep himself collected. 

“I’m going to ask you one question, Jeonghan, and I’m asking you as your friend, your brother, for the truth.” 

He nodded. 

“Jeonghan, do you like her?” 

Neither broke their gaze. Jeonghan’s fists balled but still supported the weight he placed on the tabletop. He twisted his jaw, clearly biting the inside of his cheek, something he always did when thinking or nervous. Seungcheol held the breath he took in, knowing what the answer was going to be.

“Yes.” Jeonghan’s voice was quiet, “I like her a lot.” 

They didn’t speak for the rest of the night. They didn’t speak until Jeonghan spoke on behalf of Mouse. Seungcheol wanted to argue, but that wasn’t something he wished to do, one, in public, and two, before the rest of the group. Joshua had noticed the tension earlier in the day before they arrived and when asked, Seungcheol only said that they were having differing opinions on a situation they were working out. Joshua didn’t seem to be satisfied with the answer and most definitely went to ask Jeonghan. If Jeonghan told Joshua the truth, the latter didn’t tell, not that Seungcheol expected him to. 

Joshua’s voice rang through the speakers and Seungcheol focused more on the fight than the group around him. “Just a reminder for each of our fighters, nothing is illegal, once your opponent is down, you will not engage in any more attacks, and all bets are placed. There is no taking back your bets. Three rounds, three minutes each.” Joshua smiled moving towards the edge of the ring to step out. “When the bell rings, you may begin.” 

From the corner of his eye, he watched Mouse sit forward again, legs bouncing with jitters but a smile was beaming on her face. She had taken the jacket off and looked ready to stand against the railing to cheer. Down below, Mingyu and Bear’s coach were stepping out of the ring and both fighters were staring each other down from their corners. When the loud chime of the bell came, Mouse jumped yet her smile never faltered. 

Seungcheol turned his attention down, seeing Bear step forward towards the middle and Wonwoo almost lazily followed. The latter wasn’t one to throw the first punch, he would rather have the other try and use their attack movement to his advantage. Wonwoo was always analytical, always observing the movements of others, wanting to figure out what was going on within their heads without saying a single word. 

Bear looked itching to fight, to maybe knock Wonwoo down a beg from his reigning champion position here. He was bouncing on his toes, gloved fists held close in a defensive position. It only took a moment for a fist to come from the newcomer's end, he went for a jab but Wonwoo easily blocked it. Bear threw another and Wonwoo used the opening to block his arm and swing his leg out to hit him in the side hard. The falter in Bear’s stance let him land a punch under his chin. 

This silly game of back and forth went on for a little. Seungcheol could see that Wonwoo was playing with Bear and it was pissing the new guy off. Bear took a few steps back, still bouncing on his feet as he thought of his next move. Wonwoo took the opportunity to strike, sending a fist flying towards Bear’s stomach that was blocked but the other hand came up to hit Bear in the side of the head. The moves were quick and to Seungcheol’s horror, Wonwoo got his square in the face. He was hard and the masses were yelling and screaming. It gave him a migraine. 

“Come on!” He heard one of the guys shout out, it sounded like Jihoon. 

Blood started to trickle down Wonwoo’s nose. The slight change to his expression signaled that he was pissed for that strike landing. Blow after blow the two went at it. Rib kicks, chest jabs, uppercuts, nothing was off the table. Bear’s nose was also bleeding after a right hook to his face, it was a little crooked so it was definitely broken. 

The bell chimed loudly, signaling the end of the first round. Mingyu had jumped into the ring when Wonwoo was back in the corner, wiping a towel over his face to get the sweat and blood. He was saying something but he was too far and the crowd too loud to hear anything. The taller man was probably telling him what to look out for any weaknesses he noticed. 

Mouse stood up with Soonyoung and leaned against the railing. Her fingers started to drum against the metal and she was gnawing on her lip. Soonyoung placed his arm around her shoulder and pointed down to the ring, saying something to her. She nodded along and pointed at something down there herself and rolled her eyes. 

Mingyu and the other coach exited the ring once more and the bell rang. 

Wonwoo stepped up, ready to end it this round if he could. When Bear stepped up to him in a defensive position, presumably wanting him to attack, Wonwoo went for a fake punch to open up a space for him to attack. The fake worked better than Seungcheol anticipated, Wonwoo began berating Bear with punch after punch and the further the defense broke, the harder he hit, leaning into each punch. Wonwoo was able to get a kick to his ribs again and Bear was winded, red in the face and wincing in pain that he attempted to hide. 

Bear was able to take a few steps back from Wonwoo and catch his breath but another round of Wonwoo hitting that side on his rips and he might drop. Based on how Wonwoo was moving, that’s what he was hoping for. 

“Kick his ass!” Mouse hollered down, gripping the railing with all her might. 

Seungcheol took a glance to his side, Jeonghan was sitting still but his eyes weren’t on the fight, they were on Mouse. He wasn’t even trying to hide it. 

A loud uproar jolted Seungcheol from his attention on Jeonghan and down to the ring. He leaned forward to see properly and a smirk spread on his face. Wonwoo had taken advantage of Bear protecting the injured side and got a kick in before the latter started to crumble. The protection to his sides left his core open and without any hesitation, Wonwoo got another kick into his stomach, sending Bear staggering back before assaulting him with a handful of punches, the last hitting its mark to his face and he was down. 

Wonwoo took a few steps back, not wanting to break the rules and to give space in case Bear wished to swipe his legs out from under him. He was down for a matter of moments, holding his side and trying to get up but all his strength was spent. Unwillingly, Bear beat his hand against the floor and a majority of the horde downstairs were cheering while some yelled out in protest from losing their bets. 

Bear’s coach stepped in and helped him up, followed by Joshua standing between the two. He took hold of Wonwoo’s wrist and threw his arm in the air and the mass of people were deafening again. 

“I told you!” Seokmin grinned, stepping up and standing beside Mouse, hugging her to his side.  

“Maybe I should ask Mingyu to teach me to fight.” She joked.

Soonyoung whined, “Don’t you dare, that’s my job!” 

Not long after money was collected and conversations ended, everyone started to pile out of the building. Seungcheol didn’t move from his seat, knowing everyone didn’t leave until the building was cleared and Jeonghan checked on Wonwoo. Some of their men were cleaning up the building and wiping down the ring. This might have been an underground place but it wasn’t ever going to be a disgusting pigsty, SVT was known to have more class than that. 

Jeonghan had taken his leave not long ago to the locker room with Jihoon following close behind. Everyone else had taken a seat and were either quiet or talking amongst each other. Joshua had made his way upstairs once the money distribution was done and sat beside Seungcheol after giving everyone a wave. Mouse, Seokmin, and Soonyoung were still at the railing, talking about some gossip involving some celebratory he didn’t care about. She had turned around and leaned against the metal after checking how sturdy it was, arms crossed over her chest. Despite being in such an adrenaline filled space at one point, she looked relaxed, no longer jittery from earlier. 

“You are staring.” Joshua leaned over, whispering to him. 

Seungcheol scoffed and pulled his phone out to better use his attention, whispering right back. “I wasn’t staring , asshole.” 

Rolling her eyes, Joshua crossed his legs and got comfortable. “He told me what happened last night.” 

He wasn’t surprised. Seungcheol set his jaw and cleared his throat. “We aren’t talking about that here.” 

“Well we are going to have to sooner or later because he is serious about what he said.” 

Seungcheol scrolled mindlessly through his phone, not reading a single thing that he pretended to read. “I know. That’s what I’m worried about.” 

It didn’t take too long for the four to leave the locker room, Wonwoo’s face having a few bandages and an ice pack held to the side of his head. 

“Come down, I don’t want him wasting any energy going up there.” Mingyu called from the level below. 

Seungcheol nodded for the group to head down first but he and Joshua didn’t move from their spots. Once the gate was closed and they had a little bit more privacy, Seungcheol sighed, locking his phone. 

“I don’t want him doing anything stupid.” He spoke in a hushed tone, “I trust him, but I don’t fully trust her .” 

“Then why did you agree to her helping us?” Joshua asked matter-of-factly, sending a pointed look to him. 

“You sound like him, Shua.” 

“But it’s a genuine question, Cheol. You didn’t have to say yes when Seokmin came marching in. You could have killed her for seeing our faces alone that night but you didn’t. Why did you agree?” 

Seungcheol paused, leaning forward to place his elbows on his knees and clasp his hands together. He let his head hang, trying to figure out the question himself. 

There was a point to their words. He didn’t have to agree to anything, he could have ordered Seokmin, Chan, anyone one of them, to shoot her that night at the penthouse and he even told Seokmin that. 

“What did you just say?” Seungcheol wanted to make sure he heard Seokmin right.

“My coworker followed the trail by herself about the drugs that were being stolen and I saw her. She is here in the living room with the other guys.” 

He didn’t know whether to laugh or cry. This man was stupid enough to bring her here and is only telling him days after the fact? Has he really lost it? 

“Before you get mad-” 

“Mad? Mad, Seokmin?” Seungcheol stood up furious, slamming his hands onto the table. “I’m beyond mad at you! Are you serious right now?! Have you lost your fucking mind!?” 

He really didn’t like getting angry with the members of SVT, their group wasn’t built on fear and he knew he was scary when angry. 

“Let me explain! You were the one saying you needed someone else on the inside! This is the chance!” 

Seungcheol wanted to slam his head into a wall. “Yeah, Seokmin, but one of our guys, not some random you know! You work for the government outside of this, she works for the government! Do you not see the issue with this?!” 

Seokmin stood before his desk, tense but his eyes full of fire. They were both too stubborn to stand down and Seungcheol was trying not to resort to orders. 

“You have lost your fucking mind.” The words dripped with venom. 

Seokmin held back the rolling of his eyes. “Do you have any better ideas? And you and Wonwoo are always bitching about someone pushing through the firewall, she is the best on my team and keeps trying to pry the wall back. Give her a chance.” He raised his voice, before his shoulders fell and he sighed. “She is begging for her life, Cheol. She might be some random person from my job, but outside of this, she is my friend. One of my only friends outside of everyone in this penthouse right now.”

“Bring her in here. If I get one feeling that she is going to cross us, I’ll kill her myself.” 

After he sent her out of his office, Seungcheol sat in silence. He was giving her a chance based on all the things Seokmin told them about her over the years. She was smart, normal enough to blend in, and Seokmin was right in the past, she had some surprising confidence. 

One thing caught him off guard though. 

“I have nothing left to lose, King.” 

Mouse had said his call name like it offended her and she looked authentic behind the mask of confidence and righteousness she wore. It worried him what she meant by that. 

“If I’m being honest with you, Joshua,” Seunghceol started, lifting his head and staring down to the floor below where he saw everyone. They were laughing and chatting, preparing themselves to leave. “There was this part of me that saw myself in her and that was the part that scared me.” 

“Are we all still going out for food?” Chan asked, standing beside Minghao and Junhui. 

Nearly everyone was gathered, Joshua and Seungcheol were still upstairs. 

Jeonghan took a few steps back from under the overhang and caught the two sitting beside one another, speaking quietly so no one could hear them from below. He couldn’t blame them, Joshua usually turned into the therapist of their group when something happened and this time was no different. 

Earlier in the day, Joshua barged into Jeonghan’s room and said if Seungcheol wasn’t going to tell the truth then he would have to. He tried to play it off that it was a miniscule argument that had them at odds but the younger of the two wasn’t having it. So they sat on Jeonghan’s bed and talked, and to his own surprise, he didn’t make a single joke. He explained the dress shopping, dinner, that Seungcheol was pissed, and that he was falling for Mouse. 

Joshua had given him a pat on the back and a soft smile that he had seen thousands of times before in settings as such. They grew up close, they had a bond that no one could break, and they always had each other’s back. Joshua even made a comment that he should act on the feelings if he wanted to, but he was apprehensive since he knew the Mouse thought he was only joking. 

Mouse was over between Seokmin and Soonyoung, congratulating Wonwoo on his victory and the reigning champion had enough energy to fire back at her jokes. Mingyu was like a little puppy when he heard her praise him for his good work in training Wonwoo in fighting. 

“If Wonwoo is up for it, if not we can order it back at the penthouse.” Jeonghan hummed, looking at the fighter. Wonwoo looked tired, the bruising was already starting to set in and thankfully he didn’t break anything as far as he could see. He didn’t want to take Wonwoo to their doctor if he could handle everything. A couple days of rest and some painkillers will help. 

“I’d rather just lay in bed, if some of you want to go out, go for it. Don’t let me stop you.” Wonwoo waved off the group, letting himself be leaned against Mingyu. 

Chan was already turning to Seungkwan and Vernon, asking if they wanted to go out and eat. Seungcheol and Joshua had descended the stairs and pushed the gate open, joining their companions. 

Joshua stepped up and picked up on what was being said and smiled. “Jeonghan, Seungcheol, how about we get something together?” 

Jeonghan suppressed the roll of his eyes. Seungcheol was pouting his lips but didn’t argue. 

“Ah~ Fine.” He hummed, sighing almost dramatically. Jeonghan took a step towards them. “It better be one of my favorites with you food heathens .” 

Joshua had bid everyone a good night and a small ‘ see you are home’ before they left. Jeonghan and Joshua had arrived together in the Charger while Seungcheol was left to drive by himself. The youngest of the three suggested a small Italian restaurant they frequent and were off. 

Jeonghan took the liberty to drive and wasted no time in confronting Joshua. “Is this necessary? A little intervention?” 

He scoffed. “This isn’t an intervention. I need you to not be up each other’s asses about her.” 

“We aren’t up each other’s asses about Mouse, I have my opinions, he has his, and we can work fine based on that.” 

“I need you two to understand both points of views here, Han. Cheol wants to protect everyone, he always has, and he is paranoid that she is going to do something. And you like her, he probably thinks that she is clouding some sort of judgment you have.” 

“More like Mouse is clouded by her own stuff to not realize I’m actually flirting with her.” 

“Anyways, we all need to talk and this is going to be it.” 

And that was how he ended up seated across from Seungcheol, both unwilling to look directly at one another. 

The truth was that he understood what Seungcheol was wanting to protect. Him, Seungcheol, and Joshua had been the three musketeers forever, surviving out of spite to the world. They built this underground empire together from almost nothing and it was thriving. However they weren’t street living teenagers anymore. That was the main point of contention. 

Joshua’s voice broke the bubble of silence they had. “Wow, Jeonghan, that was a great turn out tonight at the club.” He started in his normal voice before trying to mimic Seungcheol’s. “Yeah, we got a lot of bet money, it was great.” And finally he mimicked Jeonghan’s own voice. “Ah~ Thank you, I always try my best.” 

Seungcheol clicked his tongue and glared at Joshua. “I don’t sound like that.” 

Jeonghan couldn’t help but snort, looking aside to avoid the older’s gaze. “You do though.” 

“Hey! Don’t side with him.” 

“Shua, do it again, sounds like Cheol.” 

Joshua was happy to oblige. “I’m Cheol, I’m big and bad, I like sleeping with a mountain of pillows and I need the bathroom light on.” 

“ Yah-” 

Jeonghan was laughing with Joshua, covering his mouth to hide the wide smile he had. He took a breath and tried to mimic Cheol himself. “No, I'm Cheol. I’m a big softy that thinks sleeping is for the weak and my friends are childish.” 

Both him and Joshua were wheezing. Seungcheol looked ready to pop a blood vessel and his face was bright red. 

“Stop.” There was no malice in Seungcheol’s voice. “I’m serious.” 

“I’m serious.” Joshua added and Jeonghan continued to laugh. 

“You both are annoying.” 

Jeonghan had to wipe the tears that started to build in his eyes away and held his side, still snickering under his breath. Joshua was in a similar state, using his cloth napkin to cover his face and collect himself. Seungcheol was pouting at the two of them. 

“If this was some intervention, it’s failing-” 

And they lost it again, Jeonghan hitting Joshua’s arm. Luckily it was empty since the owner always let them come in after closing if needed. They were one of the reasons the business was still running, they always left amazing tips and brought food home with them, even many of the others in the group came for food here as well

“Han said-” Joshua heaved in a breath, “Han said that in the car. God I hate how much we are all alike-”

One catching his breath, he settled a softened gaze on Seungcheol, smiling at him. It felt like old times despite the conflict they were currently having. 

“Can we just agree that we are all adults and whatever bullshit we are in, we aren’t idiots?” 

“No, we are idiots. You for liking Mouse, me for agreeing to let her in, and Joshua is just dumb.” 

“Hey-” 

“ But ,” Cheol continued, “We are brothers. We stick together, we figure things out together, and we don’t let the others get hurt. I will still worry about her as a person, there are too many variables, however if you and Seokmin have some trust in her and Wonwoo doesn’t find her bad, I’ll manage.” 

That’s all they needed to eat dinner without being at each other’s throats. Jeonghan was content, Seungcheol looked more relaxed than he had been all day, and Joshua was just happy to be with his two best friends. 

They were a brotherhood, they’d handle everything together.

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DRACTOBER: DAY ONE

The first day of Drac-tober is upon us! I will be upfront with y’all, the likelihood that these will actually be daily updates continues to slim. I am a college student, first and foremost, but the wi-fi in my dorm has also totally shit the bed, and until that gets resolved (and I don’t know when that will be), watching all these films will be way more inconvenient. But, we’ll see how it all goes!

If you missed the update, I decided to use a random wheel to determine my watch order, rather than the chronological order I listed the films in originally. This film, however, was not decided by the wheel, but by the fact that my roommates really wanted to watch it with me, so it got first dibs.

For the first day of Drac-tober, we will be reviewing… Van Helsing (2004)!

As a reminder, I will be rating each film on two 1-10 scales: its accuracy as a Dracula adaptation, and how much I enjoyed it. This is a different scale than “was it good”. This disclaimer is particularly important for today’s film.

Van Helsing follows Gabriel (I KNOW) Van Helsing, monster hunter for the Vatican circa the 1880s. Van Helsing, played by Hugh Jackman, is peak 2000s eye candy, tragic but amnesiac past and all. He’s sent on a quest to slay Count Dracula and help Romani (not the word they use) prince and princess Velkan and Anna Valerious lift the curse on their family line. This movie includes most of the iconic movie monsters you can think of in some capacity (Dracula and his brides, of course, alongside Dr. Frankenstein and his monster, Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde, and various werewolves), and is, to say the least, only barely a Dracula adaptation.

Now, onto our first scale- is this a good adaptation of Dracula?

No. Of course not. But I did not expect it to be, and as far as I’m aware, it didn’t really market itself as such. Just about the only thing this film had down about Dracula was the Count’s horny tension with literally everyone, but that’s just sort of a given for any film with vampires in it, frankly. Easy 1/10 on the accuracy scale. They couldn’t even get Van Helsing’s first name right.

Now, as previously stated, I watched this film with two of my roommates. This greatly upped the enjoyment factor. First of all, watching my roommates lust after Hugh Jackman and Kate Beckinsale was extremely funny. Second of all, the value of being able to shout, together, in complete surprise at the twists and turns of this movie cannot be overstated. My favorite example is when the credits began, and the dedication to the film was to the director’s deceased father. We were flabbergasted.

This movie was also laughably strange, most of the time. The plot moved quickly enough and was stupid enough that I had fun with it, despite the fact that it had absolutely nothing to do with any of the characters involved in the film. Frankly, the most accurately adapted character was probably Frankenstein’s monster, since he was actually fully articulate (though that’s where most of the similarities to his book counterpart end).

There was also the element of the brides, who are given quite a bit more screen time and motive in this film than in the actual novel. They all have names, which is nice, and while their motive of wanting to bring their children with Dracula to life is… interesting, at least it’s there. There was also a wild amount of homoerotic tension between Aleera (the bride who lives the longest) and Anna (the female lead) which I did not see coming, but did appreciate.

That, however, is where my praise for the women in this film ends. While the brides have names and motivations, a step up from the novel, this movie is not good to its women. They are sex objects, first and foremost (and I suspect this is why the lesbian tension is there at all). They are motivators for the men above all else and literally all of them end up dead by the film’s conclusion. I cannot describe the disappointment and anger that was in the room when we realized Anna died.

There is also, of course, the fetishization and misrepresentation of Romani people present in the film. The script refers to them using the G-slur, for one, but all these supposedly Romani characters are played by white people, and are also getting saved by this random white man. The Romani heritage of the Velarious clan is basically forgotten past the first 30 minutes of the film, and thank god for it, because I know it wouldn’t have been handled well.

All in all, was this, by any stretch of the imagination a good movie? No, absolutely not. But it was a great movie to watch with my roommates on a Friday night. 7/10 on the enjoyment scale.

In conclusion, was Van Helsing (2004) a particularly good film, as an adaptation of Dracula or otherwise? No, absolutely not. But you knew that already. I would, however, recommend giving it a watch if you have friends to enjoy it with and maybe a beer or two. I don’t know if I’ll ever be returning to this film, but I had a great time watching it. It’s score may be a 4/10 overall, but it was a great start to the month.

[jawritter]

Carry On

Chapter 24

Summary: It was just a simple hunt, found on a pie festival. It was supposed to be easy. Something they’d all done one hundred and one times a million. No one could have told Y/N, Dean, and Sam that nothing from that point on would ever be the same again.

Pairing: Dean Winchester x Reader x Sam Winchester

Word Count: 3k

Warnings: PISSSTTTTT!!!! Here be smut! (I know you guys are gonna freak out when you see that warning lol.) 

Due to the graphic nature of this fic, and the fact that it will eventually contain Smut. This fic is an 18 + only fic! If you’re under 18 DO NOT read this fic!

A/N: This fic is beta’d by @kazsrm67​​​​ Thanks so much love! Please do not copy my work! Feedback is golden! I hope you all enjoy this ride with me!

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“Dean, come on, the show’s over,” Y/N laughed as she grabbed Dean’s hand and tugged, the lights were just coming back on in the theater, and the music from the credits were still blaring loudly all around the pair of them. Dean hadn’t budged when the rest of the movie goers had stood up when the show had ended, in fact, he sat with his eyes glued to the giant screen. 

Dean gave her a weak smile, and then slowly stood to his feet. He was stalling, she could tell. 

Even though she’d given him strict orders to stay in bed today while she ran her errands, and to not overthink any of this, apparently that’s exactly what he’d spent the day doing. She shouldn’t have been surprised really; Dean was the king of overthinking. 

“You never know,” he said, attempting to keep his voice light. “Sometimes they put shit after the credits are over.”

“I doubt that they have anything after that, that ending pretty much said it all,” Y/N giggled, and Dean shrugged as they shoved their way out of the darkish theater, and into the lighter hallways that lead to the exit doors, causing them both to squint. 

Dean wasted no time however, in rushing the pair of them through the crowded exit, and out into the parking lot, through the drizzling rain, and back into the safety and security of his Baby. Which wasn’t unusual for Dean, and had nothing to do with the fact that they were out in public, or that they were technically on a date; Dean just didn’t like being out in the open like that period. Old hunter paranoia probably. It was just something Dean now did that she thought nothing of. 

He did seem a lot more relaxed once he was back behind the wheel, and turning the key to send warm air filtering through the car. It was oddly still cold this time of year in Kansas. Normally by now they were starting to get the first hints of warmer weather, but it was as if the bitter cold refused to let go this time. 

“You wanna go grab some ice cream before we head home,” Dean offered, she could almost hear the tightness in his voice;  she knew Dean well enough to know that given the opportunity he’d try to exhaust her so that when they got home, she’d be ready to go to bed; without any extracurricular activities. That wasn’t going to help him though. Like it or not, the only way to overcome this irrational fear of his body was to face it head on. 

“Nah, I’m not really in the mood for ice cream,” Y/N deflected easily. “Why don’t we just head back for the night, it’s already almost 10, and most everything in this little town is gonna be closing down shortly anyway.”

She had a point there. Everything around here but the local watering hole, and the movie theater shut down at 9 PM, but she wasn’t about to give him the idea of going to the bar either. She wanted this to happen sober, for the both of them, and given the opportunity, Dean would make sure he was well and drunk beforehand so as to not remember what was to happen next. 

Dean didn’t argue with her as she expected, instead he just turned onto the main road towards home, driving past Winchester’s Auto Repair; over the rain-dampened streets towards home. She could see by the tightness of his chiseled jawline that he was overthinking what was to come, and she needed to break the ice a little, or else he was going to clam up on her any moment, and it would take days for him to open up again. 

“So,” she said, clearing her throat slightly to gain his attention. “When was the last time you’ve been to a movie?”

The question did as it was intended, and took the elder Winchester off guard, causing his brow to furrow as he continued to direct the sleek, black Impala down the empty suburban streets. 

“I think I was seventeen,” he answered after a while. “We’d been on a hunt for a while, and Dad and Bobby were having a tough time tracking down a shapeshifter in town. Sammy and I had been enrolled in the local school, and I met a girl there. She was only a year younger than me. I walked to her house one night, and took her to see a movie. The theater was only three blocks from her house. I don’t even remember what we were going to see, but as I walked into the place, the guy that was standing behind the counter selling popcorn and overpriced drinks eyes flashed white and I knew I found our guy. So, while the movie was playing, I slipped out and shot the shifter in the back of the head… I didn’t even bother going back in to get her, I just walked out, told Dad what I’d done, and we left town. That was it.”

A heaviness settled over Y/N; a suffocating one. It wasn’t fair that a seventeen-year-old boy had to live a life of such horror and violence that he wasn’t even able to take a girl he liked on a date. Then it hit her, the echoes of the past that were etched on his face as a reminder that Dean Winchester was anything but weak. In fact, the man was a killer by nature. He’d been bred and raised to be hard. John’s little soldier. That definitely wasn’t fair, but it made sense why the transition to normalcy wasn’t ever gonna be an easy one. Every time he’d even gotten a taste of what he thought might be normal, it was either ripped away from him by the hand of John Winchester himself, or the life that John had forced Dean to lead. Either way, the fault always seemed to fall to John. Y/N had to agree with Sam about that. 

“I’m sorry Dean, that’s horrible,” Y/N apologized, suddenly afraid that she’d single handedly put a damper on the entire evening and totally regretting that she had asked him anything about his past at all. 

“It’s okay,” Dean assured her as he turned onto their street, a tight smile gracing his face, showing off those eye crinkles that unquestioningly seemed to give her life. They could absolutely chase away any kind of darkness, she was convinced of it. 

“My life might not have been a fucking nineties sitcom sweetheart, but I can say I’ve seen and experienced things, and gone to places that no one else ever would. I don’t regret what I did that night. Hell, just in killing that one shifter, I saved countless other people. So, what if I didn’t get to get my dick wet, or say that I was able to walk the prom queen home from the movies while her ‘boyfriend’ was at home with a horrible case of mono that he contracted from cheating on her with almost every other girl on the cheerleading squad. All that shit is really trivial when I think back on it now, and if I wouldn’t have been where I was and hunting when we met, well, then I don’t think you’d be here sitting next to me right now, sounding like a really old fucking man.”

There was a chuckle in Dean’s voice, and it astounded her that even though his life had been anything but a bed of roses that he was even remotely able to see the bright side of it all. It was a true testament to the character that Dean tried to keep hidden, and definitely the reason that, after everything, he was still here. Still fighting. 

“Well, enough with the heavy,” Dean diverted after a moment, before she could even say anything at all. She was impressed that he’d opened up as much as he had tonight, his past wasn’t something he liked to talk a whole lot about, not that she blamed him. 

“What else you got on that little agenda tonight huh?” Dean questioned, giving her a smirk that could have melted the paint off of a fucking car. 

It was as if she felt the air shift between them, which sent a live wire straight through her veins, and caused her to openly shiver. 

Y/N shrugged, doing her best to play it cool, even though she had Dean Winchester in the flesh, looking at her like he was a predator, and she his prey. Something she had not seen from Dean in a long time, and never directed at her, usually it was at some bar room woman with more boobs than brain. 

That’s when she decided that if this was the way he was comfortable with this game going, then she was going to let him take the lead. Forcing herself to be his girlfriend for once, give him the lead, stop treating him like some child that needed her help with every little fucking thing, and stop being his fucking caregiver. 

“I don’t know,” she played coyly, twisting her hair in her fingers as she forced her eyes away from his piercing green oceans and to look over the expanse of their home instead for full effect. “Maybe I’ll go draw a bath, have some alone time before bed, read a book.”

Dean all but snorted with laughter as he kicked the door open and stepped out, flinging his hair slightly, and she wondered when he’d cut it, because he sure reminded her of Sam when he did that. Not that Dean with long hair and a light beard wasn’t attractive; it fucking was, it was just the little traits she saw of Sam in his older brother…. Or maybe it was the other way around and she never bothered to notice before. 

She watched in silence as Dean shuffled his way around the car, a smirk still firmly planted on his plump, naturally pink lips as he opened her door, and in a gesture older than them both, reached for her hand to help her stand out of the car. 

“I mean, I guess you could do that, it does sound nice,” Dean ventured, closing the car door once she was fully stepped out onto the pavement, before suddenly shifting the pair of them to pin her tiny frame against the cool, somewhat rain-dampened steel of Baby’s exterior; sealing his lips to hers in a breathtaking kiss that drove the cool mist of lightly fallen rain slowly soaking them both clean out of her mind. “Or you can come to bed with me.”

The deepened trimble of his rough voice  vibrated from his solid chest to hers, combined with his warm breath that brushing over her kiss swollen lips in contrast with the nipping wind on her face damn near had her melting at his feet. Her head was swimming with everything that was Dean Winchester, from his broad, thick shoulders, to the taste of his chewing gum still tingling on her lips. Suddenly, she wasn’t sure she could survive this encounter, because the man had barely put a hand on her, and it was already more intoxicating of an experience than she'd ever imagined. 

“I’m pretty sure I like your idea a lot better,” she stammered once she finally got her mind to work in combination with her lips as Dean worked to derail her train of thought by trailing his lips and tongue along her jawline to her ear lobe. 

With a playful nip of her suddenly very sensitive skin, Dean forced himself off of her, lacing his fingers with hers, leading her towards the front door that was illuminated by the warm, glowing porch light they’d left on before leaving home for the evening. 

Neither really paid it all that much attention though. Just as they paid little to no attention to Dean unlocking the front door to let her step inside the warm, safety of home. Nor did either party really register the way Dean tossed their coats haphazardly towards the back of the couch as they made their way towards the stairs to make the assent to their shared room. Both seemed to be suddenly trapped in the surreal fog of the shock that this is going to happen. There was a determination in the squareness of Dean’s shoulders, there was no turning back now. His mind was made up. 

With his face set in an unreadable mask, Dean closed the outside world behind him, and with a flick of his wrist, locked the door. That's when her heart started drumming a fast pace rhythm in her rib cage, and she came face to face with her own fears, insecurities, and anxiety. 

What if she did something wrong? What if she hurt him? What if she was pushing him too fast? What if this is the ultimate mistake that would shatter him?

"Hey," Dean's voice captured her attention, and she was stunned at how close to her he was suddenly standing, allowing his finger to trail over her cheek before pulling her into his warm embrace. "Are you okay?"

Y/N swallowed whatever lump had formed in her vocal chords and nodded, grounding herself in the warmth and stillness of his body holding her against him. 

"I'm okay," Y/N assured him. "I'm more worried about you than myself. I don't want you to feel like we're doing this just because of me."

Dean shook his head before letting go of her long enough to pull off the hunter green Henley he was wearing, and allowed it to fall to the floor. 

"No, I'm just as much into this as you are," he assured her. "Regardless of how this turns out, I want to be close to you, and that's all that matters."

With more urgency and control than Dean had ever shown her before, his lips collided with her own in a battle of teeth and tongue as he slowly walked her towards the bed in the center of the room, clothes falling to the floor as they went, in a shower of panted breaths and pounding hearts until the back of her knees hit the bed, and she crawled her way to the top of the bed with Dean crawling over her, his lips still in pursuit of hers. 

"You're gorgeous sweetheart," he whispered against her lips as they both halted to catch their breath. "I don't tell you that enough." 

"Speak for yourself handsome," she assured him, allowing her fingers to trace the line of freckles that speckled his shoulders. 

Deep, hooded, green orbs traced the line of her face, and worked their way down her bare body before his lips made their descent from her throat, to her breast; taking his time with each nipple until she was writhing underneath the thick frame of him. 

"Dean," she pleaded with him as he began to rut his thick length against her already soaked and throbbing center. The head of his cock pressing against her swollen clit with each pass he made. 

"Goddammit baby girl," Dean breathed, his eyes damn near rolling in their sockets as he continued rutting against her.  "So close already and I've barely touched you. Can you cum for me like this?" 

Her words stuck in her throat somehow as the pressure in her body built until a moan ripped through her body as her vision went white, and her body shook into her release. 

"Fuck," Dean swore as he pressed his cock into her quivering cunt, and she screamed at his intrusion. 

He was massive and long. Dean slowly thrust in and out of her cunt, drawing out her orgasm as long as he could before her body finally started to adjust to him, and he began to set a steady pace. 

Lips found hers in a heated kiss as he started to fuck her in earnest. Pent up frustration and need started to bubble over in a mess of skin, sweat, and groans, as their bodies worked together with one another. Every drag of his impressive manhood sent that same rubber band tightening tighter and tighter as his hips rolled harder and harder, pressing his pelvis into her clit with each calculated thrust until suddenly; he stopped, teeth gritted, and breath caught in his throat as pleasure started to fade into pain.

But she didn't let it faze him, he was doing too well, he was far too close to a much-needed release; so, she hooked her leg around his waist and used the force of her body to turn them over.  The switch distracted him from whatever it was he was feeling, and his eyes rolled back into his head as her hips moved, picking up where he left off. 

As soon as she saw that she wasn't hurting him, she began to ride him in earnest and fuck, she didn't know if she'd ever felt so fucking full in her life. The change in angle increased the friction in the places she needed him most, but as his hips lifted to meet her, thrust for thrust, desperate and chasing his own end in a moaning mess underneath her, she saw stars. Her velvet  walls clamped down hard around his dick, and he exploded inside of her as they came together, both of them riding the wave of bliss until they were an exhausted, trembling mess. 

When she'd come down, she slowly dismounted him, and quickly made her way to the bathroom to clean herself up, and return with a warm cloth to clean Dean up too. 

Heavy green eyes watched in silence until she was done, and he pulled the cover over himself and lifted it for her to join him. 

Suddenly, she was beyond tired, her limbs felt like jello as the adrenalin drained from her body. She found solace in the warmth of his skin against her own, and the steady, calm rise and fall of his chest under her hand. 

"Are you okay?" Y/N questioned, and Dean cleared his throat as her voice stirred him awake from the doze he'd slipped into. 

"Yeah, it didn't hurt like I thought it would. The more we work at it, the more I will learn my limitations and things will get easier, but for now baby rest, don't worry about me, I'm better than I've ever been."

So was she, if she was honest. She was better than she'd been in a long, long time.

Forever:

@bubsonnobx​​​

@britnwinchester​​​​​​​​​​

@samanddeaninatrenchcoat​​​​​​​​​

@wittysunflower

@demongirl1996​​​​​​​​​​  

@as-lost-as-sams-shoe​​​​​​​​​​

@jensenslady79​​​​​​​​​​

@spnwoman​​​​​​​​​​

@stoneyggirl2​​​​​​​​​​

@unabashed-lover-of-fictional-men​​​​​​​​​​

@stixnstripesworld​​​​​​​​​​

@fullwattpadmusictree​​​​​​​​​​

@nancymcl​​​​​​​​​​

@christycreature​​​​​​​​​​

@whiskey-infused-dreams​​​​​​​​​​

@supernatural79impala​​​​​​​​​​

@deandreamernp​​​​​​​​​​

@forgetthisbull​​​​​​​​​​

@miraclesoflove​​​​​​​​​​

@slamminmine​​​​​​​​​​

@deanwanddamons​​​​​​​​​​

@rvgrsbrns​​​​​​​​​​

@chevyharvelle​​​​​​​​​

@i-love-superhero-movies​​​​​​​​​​

@lyss-dw79​​​​​​​​

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@squirrelnotsam​​​​​​​​​​

@hobby27​​​​​​​​​​

@spnbaby-67​​​​​​​​​​  

@mrsjenniferwinchester​​​​​​​​​​

@defenderrosetyler​​​​​​​​​​

@thecreatiivecorner​​​​​​​​​​  

@vicmc624​​​​​​​​​​

@busy-bee-angel-misska​​​​​​​​​​

@justanotherwinchester​​​​​​​​​

@brilovesdeanwinchester​​​​​​​​​

@idksupernatural​​​​​​​​​​

@lyarr24​​​​​​​​​​

@emoryhemsworth​​​​​​​​​​

@dean-winchesters-gardian-angel​​​​​​​​​​

@flamencodiva​​​​​​​​​​

@itmejado

@thoughts-and-funnies​​​​​​​​​​

@teresa-67​​​​​​​​​​

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@peaches007​​​​​​​​​​

@bobbie3939​​​​​​​​​​

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@agirlwithdemonblood​​​​​​​​​​

@captainsoldiergirl​​​​​​​​​​

@twinkleinadiamondsky​​​​​​​​​​

Jensen and Dean’s Babes

@deans-baby-momma​​​​​​​​​​  

@impalaslytherin​​​​​​​​​​

@perpetualabsurdity​​​​​​​​​​

@msmarvelouswinchester​​​​​​​​​​

@akshi8278​​​​​​​​​​

@love-jackles​​​​​​​​​​

@irmcpar​​​​​​​​​​

@pink-sparkly-witch​​​​​​​​​​

@deans-spinster-witchs-favorites​​​​​​​​​​

@herstarburststories​​​​​​​​​​

@mimaria420​​​​​​​​​​

@deanwinchesterswitch​​​​​​​​​​

@charred-angelwings​​​​​​​​​​

@pascal-rascal424​​​​​​​​​​

@myloversgone​​​​​​​​​​

@fortheloveof-jackles​​​​​​​​​​

@eevvvaa​​​​​​​​​​

@bts-spnlvr12​​​​​​​​​​

@jxackles

@lassie-bird​​​​​​​​​​

@samsgirl93​​​​​​​​​​

@shawnie74​​​​​​​​​​  

@kaz11283​​​​​​​​​​

@mlovesstories​​​​​​​​​​

@ladysparks78

@sarahgracej​

[angst-is-love-angst-is-life]

☕️the most egregious problem The Flash has is that it literally NEVER ADDRESSES ANY of the trauma it consistently puts Barry and co through, like it has other problems but I think that's the worst lol

1000000% and I will die mad about it.

Since it’s (always) on my mind, let’s take season 2 for example shall we?

If I had a nickel for everytime Post-Zoom-trauma just disappeared at the drop of a hat, I’d have four nickels. Which isn’t a lot, but it’s fucking INFURIATING THAT IT HAPPENED F O U R TIMES

The four (for lack of a better word) victims in question: Caitlin, Barry, Jesse, and Jay.

Caitlin: kidnapped and held against her will for (I believe) two weeks (that’s putting it simply but we’ve all seen the show so🤷‍♀️). The show gives her one single episode to deal with it, during which she shows very real symptoms of PTSD— solved and therefore ignored and glossed over entirely with a single pep talk. I would also like to add that she showed NO fear of him in the season finale which makes no fucking sense with what the show established only an episode earlier. But tbh, this is the best one because at least the show ACKNOWLEDGED that trauma; if only for one episode.

Barry: Back broken during first encounter (among other severe injuries), humiliated by being dragged around the city to show he wasn’t strong enough to stop Zoom, confidence shattered from the experience. Like Caitlin, we got one episode to deal with this trauma and in that episode, Barry also showed signs and symptoms of PTSD (the entire season is evidence tbh). But of course, one pep talk from his dad and everything’s magically ok :-D !!!!!! I’m going to eat glass (also I will definitely make a post on that fucking episode because I hate it). As mentioned; he continues to have PTSD symptoms throughout the season but it’s glossed over so much and attributed to generic-superhero-stuff™️ that it really doesn’t matter. Gods, I could go on all day about Barry’s post-Zoom AND post-Thawne trauma. (Oh, he was also kidnapped, threatened, and {borderline} tortured by Zoom in the Earth-2 episodes; but that’s all normal superhero stuff ofc so it doesn’t matter right :-D !!! gnawing at the bars of my enclosure)

Jesse: Good gods where do I even start. Kidnapped by a known serial killer, tortured by said serial killer, repeatedly and (probably) constantly threatened with death, and held captive for around 9-10 months. Mm also, she was clearly terrified of Zoom every time he showed up prior to her rescue. Sounds like an extremely traumatic experience with multiple opportunities and instances to develop PTSD right? WRONG! According to the lovely writers; people are completely fine after a traumatic experience is over! What’s PTSD??? chewing glass chewing glass chewing glass. They didn’t even TRY with her, at least with Barry and Caitlin they pretended to give a shit about what they went through but Jesse makes two things crystal clear. 1) The writers don’t care about your trauma unless you’re an MC. 2) The writers put minimal effort into trauma if any; MC or not. It’s like they said ‘Ooo, we should have Caitlin kidnapped by Zoom!’ ‘Won’t that have some sort of effect on her? Being kidnapped is a terrifying experience’ ‘Ah fuck you’re right… eh, we’ll give her one episode ig’ ‘What about Jesse?’ ‘Who?’

Jay: Fucking. Hell. I ordered this in what I consider best handled to worst. Jay is by far— handled worst. Let’s see here *checks notes* Ah yes. Kidnapped and taken to a completely different Earth, an attempted theft of his powers, imprisoned and put in a mask so he can’t speak, {not confirmed but very likely with Zoom’s track record and somewhat implied} tortured, had his identity stolen and {likely} mocked and tormented about the subject, and the ~delightful~ cherry on top— held captive in this situation for at least one year. Fuck I’m so tired. Anyways; there’s not much to say. He got rescued (off-screen ofc), was able to access his powers instantly with no problems, and left to go back to his Earth. Trauma? What trauma? *gestures wildly at said trauma posted above* That’s not traumatic at all! *screams* I don’t care how much experience you have as a superhero— that doesn’t just GO AWAY! PTSD, FLASH WRITERS. LOOK INTO IT P L E A S E fuck I just remembered the show is over now ALL YOUR MC’S HAVE IT! EVERY. SINGLE. ONE. Sigh. In the end of *gestures at said trauma* all that, Jay was just used to cause Barry more greif from his father’s death. Obviously he gets roles in later seasons but (as far as I can remember) this whole thing was never brought up again. Sigh.

I COULD GO ON

I COULD GO ON FOR DAYS

but I won’t cause dear gods I’ve been typing forever now

[amastarxoxo]

LOVE DIARY : DAY 5 : out of sight, out of mind

listening to : Obsessed - Mariah Carey

she flips the store sign to ‘open’, she refills the display section near the cashier area with fresh new pastries and cleans up the shop. she hears other workers fill into the store and starts clocking in. she cleans and freshens up the machines, refilling the condiments.

a few hours passed, the store running smoothly and easy customers. she counted about fifity (50) orders so far, she has done. she started organizing the money in the cash register.

“oh wow, i didn’t know you worked here…” she feels a annoying burning sensation in her head, a upcoming headache probably. she glances up to see him and her. off all people to encounter at this very moment. she fixes her posture, putting on the most bothered face, “hello, what can i get you today?” she taps the screen of the cash register, her nails hitting it every time.

he gulps, his adam’s apple bobbing up and down, he can’t tell if he’s sweating or not. “uh…j-just a coffee with cream and milk with ice…please..” he stammers with his words, feeling embarrassed. “so a ice coffee with milk and cream.” she takes a moment to type it in. “anything else?” a moment of silence before she pushed him out of the way, “yes actually, i want two(2) strawberry cheesecakes, four(4) dozens of cookies, and a vanilla milkshake.” she waved her finger around. she types out her order. “is that it?” her finger taps against the marble counter. she nods with sass. “the total is $30.77.” her face went into shock and immediately turned around to boyfriend, where he was standing, he left exactly three(3) minutes ago.

she stares at her blankly, waiting for the money. she scoffed angrily and pulled out her card and pays. the transaction went through and she pulls out her card and back into her bag. “your order will be done in ten(10) minutes.” she gets off the counter and goes into the back as someone else takes over the register.

after ten(10) minutes, she yelled out ‘order 239’ and he walks up to the other counter and double checks everything is correct. he smiles at her gently. she gives a blank expression in return. “uh…” he broke the silence first. “is everything correct?” he makes a face, like he is about to lie for the shits and giggles. “n-no…we are missing a set of c-cookies..” she glances down at the cookies, she did miss a set. she sighs and goes back into the kitchen. he breathes out. after a minutes she comes back with the missing the set. “my apologies sir.”

he gives her a nervous smile and takes it from her, his fingers brushing against hers he felt a little electric shock between their finger tips. “bye..” he turns around and walks away back to her.

she looks down at her fingers and her ring fingertip, where she felt the electric spark. she breathes in and out, calming her mind down before she calls out to her workers she’s going on a early break.

◁◁ I I ▷▷

note : i’m not dead guys ! trust !!

diary readers : @agomeangelcat @yukii-1 @ilovedinodino @sad-darksoul @notveevee @luv-cinnamon @ofcqdesi

[blackwolfstabs]

30 Day Writing Challenge: Day 28

THE CHAIR

Tara finishes a paper and has Sam proofread it.

“Hey, Sam?!” Tara shouted from her desk in her room.

“Yeah?!” 

“Can you come here?!” she answered, leaning back into her chair and arching her back to stretch the stiffness in it. She heard her sister’s footsteps come down the hallway and glanced over to her open door, where her figure soon appeared. 

“What do you need?” Sam asked.

Her sister nodded to her laptop that sat glowing on her desk. “I finished my paper. Can you read over it for me?”

She nodded and came into the room to make her way to the desk, “Sure.” When Tara got up, she sat down and reviewed the layout. “When is this due?”

“Tonight, at midnight.”

“You realize that’s in 10 minutes, right?” Sam’s gaze broke away from the screen to glare at her. “Why did you wait so long to write it?”

The other rolled her eyes, “Because that was the most boring prompt ever! Just be glad I even made an effort to complete it. I was tempted to just turn in my outline.” She stretched her arms above her head with a gratified groan. “It’s not that long, it’ll probably take you, like, 5 minutes.” When she was answered with a scoff, she dismissed herself to let her paper be proof-read accordingly. “I’m going to get water now. Correct any grammar mistakes you see, because I’m sick of looking at it.”

Sam spent the next few minutes reading and making minor edits to her little sister’s essay, until she came back in.

Tara placed her water cup down and looked over her shoulder to monitor where she was at. “You’re only this far?” She was surprised. 

“Grammar isn’t exactly your strong suit, Tara,” was the flat reply.

The younger Carpenter just huffed and moved to nudge the propped arm that Sam was leaning her head against. When she earned a confused look, she took it upon herself to briefly explain. “Move. I wanna sit with you,” she ordered.

Sam glanced down to the single-person chair, and then looked back up at her. “Uh, this chair’s for one person?” 

“That’s fine.” Tara’s invited herself to slip between the occupied seat and the desk to sit down on her lap. “I’m small, so you can just hold me.” She grabbed her cup and took another sip, trying to hide the amused smile pulling at her lips while her big sister blinked at her.

“Are you serious?”

“Mm-hmm.” She nodded and put the cup back down on the desk. “Absolutely. Now, quit staring at me and stare at my paper, yeah?” she playfully reached behind to poke her side.

Sam smirked and rolled her eyes. “Hey, I’m the one doing you a favor, remember?” she teased and returned the prod. “I could make you read over it yourself.”

Her little sister snickered and twisted away at the contact. “Nooo, I’m too tired to do it myself,” she whined, dramatically. 

Again, her sibling scoffed and shook her head, letting Tara lean back into her, to which she rested her chin on her shoulder to continue reading. 

While she did so, Tara took the arm that wasn’t controlling the mouse and guided it over her torso to hold her in place. She tilted her head, studying the skin of her sister’s forearm. “Have you ever thought about getting a tattoo?”

“Mm– not really,” came the quick answer.

She began tracing random drawings and designs on her arm, continuing to space-off into the idea. “We should get matching tattoos. We could do, like, matching emojis, or each other’s birthdays, or our initials. Ooh, or what about a knife and phone—”

“Tara, I have 4 minutes to read this,” Samantha cut in. “I can’t focus when you’re talking.”

“Sorry.”

The younger Carpenter sighed and tilted her head back to stare at the ceiling. As she blinked at the shadows from the popcorn detail, she listened to the sound of Sam’s steady breathing and the occasional clicking of the mouse and keyboard. Then, she shifted herself to the side, draping her legs over the other’s and holding onto her neck, like she used to do as a kid. Sam shifted a little but didn’t seem to mind, which allowed her to nuzzle her head into the crook of her neck to watch the screen with weary eyes. “You’re almost done,” she pointed out, “This is the last paragraph before the conclusion.” When she wasn’t answered in any way, she asked, “Am I heavy?”

This got her a response. “No,” her older sister shook her head, the arm around the other’s waist pulling tighter to hold her close. She knew whenever Tara was tired, she became clingy and seemed to regress into her pre-adolescent behaviors—when she’d want her attention and affection. She never minded, though.

“But heavier than when we were little, right?”

Still, the older Carpenter denied it, “Nope.” She scrolled down the screen to move on to the conclusion. “Never has there ever been a time when I couldn’t hold you.”

This made Tara chuckle. “You say that like you think it’ll be that way forever.”

“It will be. I’d hold you no matter what, my love.”

“Even if I told you not to?” she tested.

“Yep.”

“Even if I yelled at you and made you cry?”

“Mm-hmm.”

And then her challenges started to become darker.

“Even if your arms were broken?”

“Mm-hmm.”

“Even if the world was falling down around us?”

“No matter what.”

“‘Forget the world, there’s just us,’ right?”

Sam finished reading her sister’s essay and looked away from the screen to kiss her head. “Mm-hmm. That’s right.”

Tara then lightened the mood. “You’re so drama-coded, Sammy,” she teased.

“You’re the one who climbed in my lap, because you wanted my attention,” she countered.

The other turned her face to hide it in her sister’s shirt. “How do you know?”

She chuckled. “It was the chair, Tara…”

Because the chair was only meant for one person to sit in it, Tara chose to sit on her lap.

“It was the chair…”

Because of the chair, Sam was able to hold her like this.

And that was just the way it was.

short but giving soft!carpenter sister vibes so it checks out

All my best! ♡ - parker

[cupcakeinat0r]

HIIII 🌵 here again !!

Idk about you but my biggest kinda like headcanon about my guy Miguel is that Peter buys him a bunch of those comedy shirts and gives him pictures of Mayday along with little gifts and stuff and that he keeps ALL of them. Like he defo has a little cupboard or something dedicated to them. Yk what I mean?? He probably has a little shrine for Mayday, dare I say. Did you see the way he held her in that one atsv scene where he was introduced to Miles, and how he only gave her back when she had reached for Peter?? Ugh. I’m melting into a puddle on the floor.

I’m gonna sound like an absolute maniac here talking about Miguel because he’s genuinely a massive fixation of mine but carrying on what I said in the last post, it would be insane if he didn’t get a redemption arc or got shunned as the bad guy over and over. Having a daughter disappear in your arms is probably one of the most traumatising things to happen to someone. We got build up, build up, build up and then the climax of the problem, but no solution. What will the solution be?? Sony??? Hello??? They CANNOT leave us hanging like that.

Honestly it’s really hard to hate ANYONE in the spiderverse movies. I saw a tumblr post the other day where someone said that everyone in the movies were depicted as real people, with an equally complex story, so it’s more difficult to hate them. I agree with it 100%. Yeah, Miguel was really horrible to Miles and the others and they deserve a massive apology but Miguel also probably shuts himself away instead of talking to people, so he feels combined guilt and also stress because he just never talks about it. Anyone would snap like that. I really hope we get to see a softer side of him, or like you said: a heart to heart talk to someone or even to himself so we can understand him more. Maybe we can get a little insight of what happened in his original universe after he left to be a dad in the other one???

I’m gonna shut up now bcs this is getting really long and this is kind of me just dumping my thoughts into your asks (sorryyyttt) is it obvious I really love this man

- 🌵 (she/her (pronouns reveal??? Insane. I might also start putting the date here so I can remember when I wrote it if you answer these (17/6/24))) LOVE YOU

Hi 🌵!!!!!!<3

Awww wait that hc is so cute!!! He would most likely never tell or let anyone know that he keeps those gifts lmao. And that man loves that little girl, and yes, that is a strong word, but Miguel is a girl dad thru n thru n that lil baby is his weakness!!

Right! They’re probably off in some cupboard or hidden drawer at his lab. It’d be real easy to hide things in there considering how dark it is lmao. Do you think in order to feel something, he’ll go n look at those ‘gifts’ n think about Gabriella n then start getting emotional then then then and then

No yeah it would definitely feel like a cheat if Sony didn’t spend some time on him. It would be a huuuuge fumble. Like, Sony, y’all have a million dollar character right here that is begging for redemption, please n thank you <3 On my knees and praying to whoever is up there that the girlies at Sony write a scene of Miguel being soft. Like…. Please…. Yall gave him 10 minutes of screen time and he was mad for every single one of them.

That would be a nice idea!!! I have hopes that they’ll expand on that. I’m just saying, if it ends up that the theory is actual BS and Gabri’s dimension didn’t fall bc of Miguel but bc of something completely unrelated… I could literally pass away happy omfg.

Don’t be sorry!!! I love when people leave asks like these!!! That’s we come on this app, to let our fixations fixate !!! We love our man <3

Ngl, the date thing is actually kinda helpful cuz then I see it n I’m like “omfg I’m the worst I made this person wait days before I answered this ask, let me respond to it now” lmao. And omg!! She/her!!! A fellow girlie (gn)!!!!

Thanks for sending this in, luv! Always a pleasure talking to you 🫶🌵 ily MWAH <3