#it got to the point where I just ignored her cause her demand was unrealistic I’m doing it as fast as I can but it’s not my fault if it’s

[gatheryepens]

So I’m like 99.1% going to quit my job

[tobesolonely]

aura

A/n: Hi everyone! this is a tad bit different from the things i usually write (I think) as i wanted to switch things up a little bit. I’m kinda nervous to post it so pleaseee please let me know your thoughts! As always please enjoy!! thank you to everyone who beta read for me btw :)

summary: witch!y/n can see auras and harry is blue

my ko-fi! thank you :)

. ⋅ ˚̣- : ✧ : – ⭒ ⊹ ⭒ – : ✧ : -˚̣⋅ .

Y/N has always been able to easily empathize with others. She could see others' emotional energy— their aura— and this made it easy to know exactly what they were feeling. Not only could she see auras, but she could take away anyone’s emotional turmoil just by touching them.

One of Y/N’s most vivid memories from her childhood was when her best friend came to school one morning in tears over the death of her pet fish. When Y/N leaned in to give her a hug, she felt an overwhelming heaviness overtake her body as soon as they made contact. Upon pulling away from the hug, her friend’s demeanor was completely changed. Instead of being sad over the death of her fish, she was able to instead reflect on all the good times she had with him. Her friend was fine for the rest of the day, but Y/N was left grieving over a fish she never even owned.

Y/N went home that day, confused. How was it that her friend was so easily cheered up just from a hug? Was that all it took for Y/N to make others feel better? If that was the case, she decided she wanted to be a ‘Professional Hugger’ when she grew up. As time went on, Y/N learned that she didn’t even have to hug others to rid them of their mental pain. The slightest touch from her instantly made anyone she came into contact with feel better.

It took a few months for Y/N to realize it was her touch that healed others. Sure, that mental anguish then became hers to carry, but how many people could say they could heal someone just by touching them? If that was the price she had to pay, then so be it. From that point on Y/N made it a point to help anyone she could. 

As Y/N got older and her skill with this power grew, she learned to redirect the painful energy elsewhere so she didn’t always have to sit with it. It worked some of the time, but it was something she was still learning to master. Y/N wasn’t always successful in doing this, though. While whoever Y/N touched went about their day feeling great, she would experience their emotions so intensely that she felt as if she were coming down with a cold. Y/N dealt with it in silence because the way she saw it if she was blessed with this gift, she had to be selfless and put it to good use. Y/N was a firm believer that all the good she put out would come back to her in another life at least ten times over.

It was difficult for Y/N not to touch everyone she saw whose aura reflected sadness, anxiety, or worry. She tried to stick to only doing this to people she knew, but there were some instances where Y/N encountered someone who was just so clearly unhappy that she could not help herself. 

For example, right now. 

Y/N immediately sensed this stranger’s emotional turmoil as soon as they entered the space. It was late afternoon on a Wednesday. Y/N had the longest, most physically demanding day at work and the last thing she wanted to do was go home and cook. Even though she had just gone grocery shopping two days prior, she stopped by her favorite Thai place on the way home. Y/N was in the middle of ordering when their presence quite literally took her breath away, causing her to stumble over her words. 

She turned to look over her shoulder at the person who was so greatly distracting her and locked eyes with the most pitiful looking stranger she’d seen all day. The first thing Y/N noticed about him was his hair. It was unruly, like he had just gotten out of bed. She also noticed how tall he was–– if he had just a couple more inches on him, he would’ve had to crane his neck to enter the establishment. Upon making eye contact with Y/N the man quickly looked down at his shoes, twiddling his thumbs. His aura was a mixture of indigo and dark red when Y/N looked at him. Anger and sensitivity.

“Do you still need a moment?”

The voice of the cashier breaks Y/N out of her analytical thoughts of the stranger standing a few feet behind her. She nods, re-situating her purse on her left shoulder. 

“Uh, please. He can go ahead if he’s ready.” Y/N gestures behind her and the cashier nods, asking the man behind her if he was ready to order yet. He steps up to the front counter, eyes trained on his feet as if he couldn’t walk without watching every step he took. 

His energy was intense and Y/N wasn’t sure how much longer she could ignore it. Something about him was reeling her in— his aura wasn’t looking too bright at the moment, but she could just tell it usually was. She felt compelled to take away his pain, and she hadn’t spoken a single word to him yet. While he was placing his order, Y/N internally debated on whether or not she should “accidentally” graze his arm when they walked past each other. Would that be weird? What if she wasn’t able to redirect his negative energy elsewhere? While she did love to help whenever she could, some people’s emotional baggage was just a little too heavy. She didn’t know him. For all she knew, he could be a killer!

He turns back around once he’s finished ordering and stands by the entrance, out of Y/N’s way. The pair lock eyes again as Y/N makes her way back to the counter to order. Once again, he quickly looked away from her. Y/N’s trying to ignore the annoying nagging feeling she gets when she wants to help someone, but it’s unrelenting. She makes up her mind that once she’s done, she will approach this stranger to get a better read on his emotions. 

“Nice weather we’re having today, isn’t it?” She cringes at her choice of a conversation starter and hopes he doesn’t notice. Y/N folds her hands across her chest, forcing herself not to reach out to him. He nods.

“Lovely.”

The tone of his voice causes Y/N to wince. It was sharp and short. He was clearly not in the mood to converse. Although Y/N knows this, she continues on.

“I love this place. I think I come here at least twice a month–– what’s your go-to order?”

The man turns to fully face Y/N this time, his aura now more red than blue. He was beginning to grow annoyed with her small talk. 

“Green curry and stir-fried vegetables.” He doesn’t ask Y/N for her order, so she takes this as her signal to stop speaking to him. The bell above the door jingles, signaling another persons’ entry. Their aura is shining gold–– Y/N would not have to interfere. 

Y/N moves away from this man, deciding not to speak to him anymore. She was getting better at accepting the fact that no matter how much she wanted to, it was impossible to help everyone. As he collected his food from the front and turned to leave, not sparing Y/N another glance, she silently hoped that whatever was wrong with this man would not last.

. ⋅ ˚̣- : ✧ : – ⭒ ⊹ ⭒ – : ✧ : -˚̣⋅ .

Harry was in a funk. There was no denying it, and he was over feeling so terribly. He hadn’t been feeling like himself for far too long. It seemed like everyone wanted something from him when he had nothing left to give. Jeff had set unrealistic deadlines, his mother was upset with him for not calling enough, and he was exhausted from constantly traveling and waking up in a new time zone. Harry needed a break.

Harry’s mind wandered to the pretty girl in the Thai place. She seemed inquisitive. She was very curious about his go-to order, and she was standing a little too close for his comfort. Harry was surprised when she didn’t ask him for a picture. He wasn’t trying to be cocky, but nearly everyone he met asked him for a picture–– he was Harry Styles. However, it was almost like this girl didn’t know who he was. She didn’t seem starstruck in the slightest.

While Harry was waiting for the light to change, it dawned on him that he may have been a tad bit rude to her. He noticed her happy expression drop when he shut her down, but he didn’t feel like talking. He liked to move from place to place as quickly as he could in the off chance he got recognized and it started circulating on Twitter. Still, he couldn’t help feeling a little bad. She was sweet like honey–– or so it seemed. In their brief interaction, she bought him comfort.

Harry wanted to turn back around and go back to the restaurant to check if she was still there. What would be the point, though? She would most likely be long gone by the time he made it back over there, as she did order immediately after him. Harry’s torn out of his thoughts when the cars behind him start honking, and he realizes the light must’ve turned green. He decides not to think about the confrontation anymore. 

. ⋅ ˚̣- : ✧ : – ⭒ ⊹ ⭒ – : ✧ : -˚̣⋅ .

The world works in mysterious ways. 

Y/N was sure she’d never encounter the grumpy man from her favorite Thai restaurant again but yet here she was in another situation that involved take-out and him. His aura was dark indigo this time. Stress? Isolation? Y/N didn’t know, but she wanted to help him. In her eyes, there was no reason for anyone to be down this badly. She just wanted everyone to be as happy as she (almost) always was! She takes a deep breath before approaching him.

“Hi. How are you?”

Harry was absorbed in a text conversation involving his manager and stylist when a sweet, familiar voice interrupts him. 

“I’m okay, thank you. Yourself? Also, we’ve spoken before, I believe.”

She nods, a troubled look on her face. “We have. At the Thai place. How are you, though? Really.”

Harry was beginning to find her a bit strange (but still incredibly gorgeous, even more than he did before now that he got a good look at her face). Why was she so concerned with how he was feeling? Was she going to ask him for a picture or not? As Harry opened his mouth to again tell her he was fine, the desire to tell her how he was really feeling came over him. So he did.

“Honestly? ‘M exhausted. I’ve been doing a lot of traveling and my manager wants a lot from me. I think I jus’ need a break.” 

He radiated red. Anxiety? Anger?

“What do you do for work?” Now it was Harry’s turn to wear the troubled look.

“I don’t mean this to be rude, but you’re serious?”

Y/N nods, reaching out to place her hand on his shoulder. Just as quickly as she touches him she removes her hand, and she’s almost certain he didn’t even feel her touch. She notices him let out a visible sigh of relief, his aura changing from a red to a pale yellow. Optimism. Positivity. This causes her to let out her own sigh of relief. 

“You’re feeling better! That’s great.” Y/N was not able to redirect his negative energy as the restaurant was too crowded and she didn’t want to risk putting it on anyone else, and she was feeling him. He was stressed, overworked, and anxious. Y/N just wanted to go home and nap, no longer in the mood for the food she just ordered.

Harry decided she was definitely odd but in the most endearing way possible. “How do you know I’m feeling better? Wait, am I feeling better?” Y/N watches as he works through his emotions, his aura ranging in color before settling back on pale yellow. 

“Are you?” Y/N knows the answer to this of course, but she wants to hear him say it.

“I think I am. I’ve been feelin’ horrible all week but saying how I felt out loud to you automatically made me feel better. Kind of weird, but I won’t question it. Thank you for asking…,” Harry scrunches his nose, a distasteful expression on his face. “I don’t think ‘ve gotten your name yet.”

Y/N gives him a small, forced smile. “I’m Y/F/N Y/L/N. It’s nice to meet you. I’ll be seeing you around, I think.” Before Harry can tell her his name she’s gone.

And she didn’t even grab her food.

. ⋅ ˚̣- : ✧ : – ⭒ ⊹ ⭒ – : ✧ : -˚̣⋅ .

Y/N felt like she had been hit by a ton of bricks. How one person could carry around all this emotional baggage was beyond her, but she wanted it gone. Immediately.

There was a spell Y/N kept on hand for times like these. Times when she couldn’t redirect the negative energy before it got to her. Times when it was just too much to carry. Y/N had regretfully done this spell more times than she could count and was an expert at reciting it from memory. The vile was open and ready to capture the negative energy that would shortly be leaving her.

Y/N works quickly to complete the process, unsure of what time her roommate would come barreling through the door. She had caught her doing things she deemed strange one too many times (she thought her roommate almost figured out who she really was when she caught her having a full-on conversation with her cat, Sapphire, once). She was beginning to run out of excuses for her “unusual” behavior. Y/N mutters under her breath, willing the energy to exit her.

She notices right away when it leaves her. She feels lighter— like her usual self again. She guides the energy into the vile and immediately seals it, hurrying into her room to lock it away. Y/N kept a box in her closet that she only opened if she had to. It was her Pandora’s Box, in a way. Nothing bad would be released into the world if she opened the box, but if the viles’ were opened then the bad energy she trapped would be re-released into the world, finding its way back to their original owners.

Y/N feels like she can breathe again once she bolts the box. She hoped that whatever he was doing, wherever this man was, he was still feeling okay. 

Also, for his sake and everyone’s around him, she hoped he got a break.

. ⋅ ˚̣- : ✧ : – ⭒ ⊹ ⭒ – : ✧ : -˚̣⋅ .

Y/N was on Harry’s mind. 

Something about her was magnetic. He wished he’d gotten more information about her than only her name, but she left him in such a hurry he could hardly process their conversation. Harry felt like a madman! He searched ‘Y/F/N Y/L/N’ on all social media platforms, but he couldn’t find her anywhere. It was dumb luck that he had ran into her twice in such a short time span, and he hoped good things happened in threes and he would see her again.

He was almost certain that Jeff thought he was losing his mind.

Harry tried explaining his interaction with Y/N first at the Thai food spot and again when he was getting Greek food, but Jeff thought Harry was so sleep deprived he was imagining things. 

“How did you see a beautiful, young woman who didn’t freak out or ask for a picture? Doesn’t make sense. You’re Harry Styles.”

“That’s what I thought!” Harry exclaimed wildly. He holds his phone up. “I’m thinkin’ she really doesn’t know who I am, though. I couldn’t find her on any social media platform. It’s like she’s off the grid or somethin’.”

“No social media at all? A little weird, isn’t it?”

“It’s fitting for her. If you met her then you would understand what I meant,” Harry felt the need to defend this alluring stranger who took away his pain just by listening to him speak. “Look at me, Jeff. Don’t I seem so much better than I was jus’ a few days ago?”

His manager couldn’t deny that Harry’s mood (and attitude) had done a 360. He didn’t complain about being woken up early and he happily consented to do not one, but two interviews.

“I mean, yeah? I guess––”

“Thanks to her!” Harry cuts him off. “I’m telling you. I need to see her again and thank her for whatever she did.”

“How are you going to do that?” 

Harry leaned back against the counter in Jeff’s kitchen, mulling the question over. It was a valid one. How was he going to do that? He already tried to no avail to find her on social media. He hardly knew anything about her. All he knew was her name, that they seemed to have a similar taste in food, and that she went to the Thai spot at least two times a month. 

That was it.

In one last effort to contact Y/N again, Harry planned to go to the Thai food place, pray the cashier who was working when he went in earlier this week was there, and leave his number with her. It was a risky move, probably not the smartest thing he could do, and Jeff would for sure drop him as a client if he knew Harry was doing things like this. Harry didn’t care. Phone numbers could always be changed, and he was desperate. 

If Harry couldn’t contact Y/N, he would wait for her to contact him.

. ⋅ ˚̣- : ✧ : – ⭒ ⊹ ⭒ – : ✧ : -˚̣⋅ .

Y/N was confused.

She stopped at her favorite Thai food spot (sooner in the month than anticipated, but she had another long day), ordered her usual, and was about to leave when the sweet cashier who was always there insisted she takes the piece of paper with ‘HARRY’ followed by a phone number scrawled on it.

“For me?” Y/N was confused. Something like this had never happened to her before. I mean, does it happen to anyone?

“He insisted,” the cashier warmly responds. “I’ve been waiting for you to come back–– knew you would soon enough.” Y/N’s face flushes at this and she makes a mental note to start cooking more.

“Well…,” Y/N trails off, not sure what to say. “Thank you? I guess I’ll give him a call and let him know you’ve done well.” The cashier’s aura shines pink. Affection. Love.

“You should. Take care!”

Y/N leaves the restaurant with the crumpled piece of paper in her sweaty hands, eager to get home as soon as possible. She wasn’t sure what it was, but something told her not to disregard him. His reaching out was a sign–– and Y/N did not ignore signs.

. ⋅ ˚̣- : ✧ : – ⭒ ⊹ ⭒ – : ✧ : -˚̣⋅ .

“She hasn’t called me yet.”

“It’s been five days, Harry. She probably doesn’t eat Thai food every day. I can’t believe you did something so fuckin’ stupid…”

Jeff’s reprimanding fades into the background as Harry drifts off into daydreaming about what it would be like if– when- Y/N finally called him. Would she find him obsessed? What if she thought he was stalking her? Harry decided that when she called, he would immediately clear things up. He’d thank her for her kindness (his trademark) and see how she was doing. She left the Greek food place so abruptly when he last saw her that he was under the impression something was bothering her. Harry wasn’t sure what he could do to help if something was troubling her, but he could at least extend a listening ear to her as she did to him.

“Harry, are you listening?”

“What was that?”

Jeff shakes his head at Harry, an amused expression on his face. “Man, I hope she calls you soon.”

. ⋅ ˚̣- : ✧ : – ⭒ ⊹ ⭒ – : ✧ : -˚̣⋅ .

The phone rang three times. After the third ring, his gruff voice came through the other end of the phone.

“Hello?”

Y/N sharply inhales, suddenly growing nervous. “Is this Harry?” Silence. Y/N was preparing to repeat herself when he spoke again.

“Is this Y/N?”

Now it’s Y/N’s turn to be silent. Harry says nothing, awaiting her response. “Well, it is. You sound familiar–– how do we know each other?”

“Now that ’m actually able to talk to you, it sounds a bit silly…” He seems unsure of himself. “Promise y’won’t laugh at me?”

“I promise.”

Y/N says it with such conviction that Harry believes her, and it gives him the confidence he needs to proceed. “I was havin’ a hard time a couple of weeks ago. I was in line to get some falafel and you asked me what was wrong. What was really wrong.” Y/N says nothing, so Harry continues.

“I told you I was exhausted from work ‘nd wanted a break. That’s it, y’know? But I immediately felt better afterward. I’ve actually been feelin’ great ever since. I jus’ wanted to thank you, is all. I know it sounds weird and it’s probably all in m’head but I feel like talkin’ with you was just what I needed.” Harry’s rambling, nerves finally catching up to him. She was gorgeous and he was afraid she would think he was insane. 

“I’m glad to hear you’re still feeling better, Harry. That’s great.” Y/N’s voice is gentle and soft and to Harry, hearing her speak was just as comforting as getting a hug from his mum.

“I’m also really sorry that I was such a dick when you tried talkin’ to me the first time at the Thai spot,'' Harry feels embarrassed, stumbling over his words. “Not sure if you remember but I was just havin’ a shit day. I thought you were gonna ask for a picture and I just wasn’t in the mood.”

Y/N doesn’t say anything and Harry winces, certain he’s offended her when she starts talking again. 

“That’s okay. I know you were having a bad day.” 

“How did you know I was having a bad day?” Again, Y/N pauses before answering. 

“Well, I didn’t do anything to you for you to be so rude to me. I knew it had to be a problem involving yourself.” Harry notices that Y/N speaks very slowly. It’s as if she considers every word before she speaks. He’s intrigued by her. 

“That is very true.” Y/N doesn’t say anything so Harry takes it as his cue to keep talking. “I’m sorry if me leaving my number at the restaurant creeped you out. I hope you didn’t feel obligated to call me.”

“Not at all. I’ve actually been wondering how you were doing since we had our encounter at the Greek place–– that doesn’t creep you out either, right?”

Y/N was hypnotizing. Harry was infatuated. 

“Not at all.”

“Can I ask you something, Harry?”

“Course.”

“Why would I want a picture with you?”

Harry had to get to know her.

“Do y’wanna grab coffee sometime?”

. ⋅ ˚̣- : ✧ : – ⭒ ⊹ ⭒ – : ✧ : -˚̣⋅ .

Something was definitely different about Y/N–– Harry just couldn’t put his finger on what it was. To begin, she truly had absolutely no idea who Harry was. At first, he thought she was just messing with him, but he quickly realized she was being serious. Y/N said she had “heard of” One Direction, but she never listened to the band’s music. Harry supposed that could account for her being unaware as to who he was. Maybe he wasn’t a “household name” like Jeff always said he was. 

Harry was also right about her not having social media. When he asked Y/N why she didn’t use it, she said she preferred to occupy her time with more substantial things. She didn’t elaborate, and Harry didn’t ask. She was however very interested to learn what a big social media following Harry had. He tweeted the word “Do” and they watched as the internet went wild trying to decipher what he meant. He even started trending worldwide for it. It made sense to Y/N after that why Harry was so intent on not taking off his sunglasses and beanie.

Y/N was having a great time analyzing his aura. 

She noticed that whenever someone glanced in their direction, his aura briefly turned red. Anxiety. When Y/N attempted to make a joke, it turned pink (she chose not to analyze that too much). Mainly though, his aura shone that beautiful, pale yellow that Y/N loved to see the most. Harry was doing well. He was happy. Y/N would not have to intervene today.

She couldn’t explain why, but she felt obligated to help him. Even though his energy made her feel so terribly last time, she would’ve still taken away his pain if he was blue without even thinking twice about it. Why was she so drawn to him? Y/N wasn’t sure what it was about Harry that drew her in, but she knew she would do anything to help him. Anything to see him happy.

Unbeknownst to Y/N, Harry felt the same way.

. ⋅ ˚̣- : ✧ : – ⭒ ⊹ ⭒ – : ✧ : -˚̣⋅ .

Y/N missed Harry terribly.

She wanted to call him–– just a brief conversation to see if he was doing okay. He mentioned when they last saw each other nearly two weeks prior that he was going to be very busy in the coming days, and she wondered if he still was. Harry told Y/N that he loved his job (of course he did!), but being so busy sometimes really hurt him. Not just mentally, but physically as well. 

She longed for him.

Y/N searched through her call list for Harry’s number and immediately tapped it, listening closely as it rang. She was about to end the call in defeat when Harry answered at the last moment.

“Hello?” He sounded tired, under the weather.

“Harry,” Y/N begins. “I haven’t heard from you in a bit and I just wanted to see if all was well. How do you feel?”

“Hi Y/N,” Harry perks up slightly, but he still sounds a bit congested. “‘M not sure if you can tell from m’voice, but I’ve got a cold.”

Although Y/N wishes with every fiber of her being that she could rid Harry of his cold, she cannot. However, she can make sure all is well with his mind. 

“I’m sorry to hear that,” she pauses for a moment as she usually does, hoping Harry can tell how sincere she’s being on the other end. “How do you feel though? Are you still feeling happy?”

“Jus’ feelin’ not the greatest again. I’ve been stuck in my house with this fuckin’ cold and haven’t seen anyone in days.”

“I can come over.” Y/N doesn’t think twice before offering. If he had to suffer physically, she at least wanted him to feel okay mentally.

“I don’t want to get you sick. It’s okay–”

“I don’t mind, really. I’ll keep you company.”

Harry doesn’t say anything and Y/N’s sure she must’ve creeped him out. They don’t even know each other well and here she was offering to come over to his home and keep him company while he was sick. She’s about to rescind her offer when he lets out a loud sigh.

“My manager might kill me if he finds out I did this… but sure, let me give you my address.”

. ⋅ ˚̣- : ✧ : – ⭒ ⊹ ⭒ – : ✧ : -˚̣⋅ .

As soon as Harry got off the phone, he sprung into action. His home was a mess. There were crumpled up tissues all over the floor beside his bed, a sink full of dishes, and he’s pretty sure every bathroom in his house was a mess. He opted to not have anyone over to clean up after him as he didn’t want to risk getting anyone sick and man did it show.

He quickly gathered up all the tissues and threw them into the bin in the corner of his bedroom, surveying the rest of the mess before deciding he and Y/N wouldn’t be spending time in there, anyway. He was going to focus on the mess downstairs, instead. He loaded his dishwasher and record time and used disinfectant wipes on every surface he could in the kitchen, dining room, and living room. He then surveyed the bathrooms and cleaned the one with the least amount of mess, closing the doors to the other ones. He would worry about those some other time. 

Harry was nervous to have Y/N over. He was just nervous to be around her in general. He missed her over the past couple of weeks but he opted out of contacting her, terrified that he was a bother. After Harry finished cleaning in record time, it dawned on him that he didn’t really have any food prepared to offer Y/N. If she was coming over to his house just to cheer him up, the least he could do was offer her something to eat. Harry hated doing things like this, but he was desperate. He texted his assistant and asked if they could drop off some food from the Greek place he and Y/N liked, making a mental note to find out what other places she enjoyed eating at for next time.

Y/N gets to his house much sooner than he was anticipating.

He rushes to his front door, looking through the peephole before opening the door. Y/N has a big smile on her face and looks absolutely gorgeous, as she usually does. She has a huge water bottle in one hand and a tote bag with the phases of the moon slung over her shoulder. He’s never seen it before and thinks it’s lovely.

“Hi,” Harry says breathlessly. “Thanks for coming. Uh, come in please.”

Y/N smiles and takes a small step forward, crossing the threshold of Harry’s home. She thought it was incredible–– and rather clean. “What can I do to help?” 

Harry was getting used to Y/N’s straightforward approach to things, so he’s not phased by her question. “Jus’ you bein’ here is great, honestly.”

Y/N can see that Harry’s aura is that deep indigo that she’s not fond of, but she wonders if he can work through it himself before she steps in. “So it’s just your cold that’s got you feeling down? Can we sit down and talk about it?”

“Sure. Also, not sure if you’ve eaten yet or not but I’m gettin’ some food dropped off for us.”

“That sounds great, I haven’t had dinner yet so thank you. Can we sit?” Y/N doesn’t wait for Harry to answer. She makes her way to his plush couch in the adjoining room, walking through the place like she’s been there before. Harry loves it.

“I think I told you the gist of it on the phone earlier,” Harry says, settling onto the couch beside her. He leaves some space in between them since he doesn’t want to risk getting her sick, but he wishes he was closer to her. “I’ve been feelin’ down ‘cause I’ve been stuck in the house with this cold. S’not fun.” Y/N hums in understanding. Harry notices that she reaches out her hand to him slightly and then quickly retracts it, but he doesn’t mention it. Y/N says nothing, just continues looking inquisitively at him. Harry doesn’t feel uncomfortable under her gaze–– he stares back. 

“Something’s making you feel nervous. What is it?”

Harry isn’t surprised that she was able to figure out there was more to what he was feeling than just loneliness. How was he supposed to tell Y/N that she was the reason for his nervousness, though?

“It’s nothing. I promise.”

“I don’t think so.”

Harry scratches the back of his neck nervously. “How are you so good at reading me? S’like you’re inside my brain, Y/N.” He lets out a little chuckle after saying this but quickly stops when he realizes Y/N isn’t laughing along with him.

“You’re just easy to read,” she cooly responds after a second. “Why are you so nervous? Do you have something coming up for work?”

“Not really…” 

“Then what is it? Something going on with someone in your family?” 

Harry was quickly realizing Y/N wouldn’t drop this unless Harry gave her an answer. He silently hopes for the best before answering her. 

“It’s you,” he mumbles, shifting around uncomfortably on his couch. “You make me nervous.” Y/N watches as his aura changes from red and blue to pink, and his cheeks flush slightly. 

“Why do I make you nervous?”

“You just do.”

“Why? Have I done something to hurt you?”

Y/N was so painfully oblivious that it was cute. Harry was quickly realizing that his heart doubled in size every time he talked to her.

“No. Quite the opposite, actually,” Harry reaches in the pocket of his sweatpants for a tissue, facing away from her while he pauses to blow his nose. “You’re so… you’re jus’ very interesting. Mesmerizing, really.”

Y/N feels her skin heat up at Harry’s compliment. His aura is still shining pink, the brightest pink she’s ever seen since meeting him. She was sad to see there was still quite a bit of indigo and red, though. “Thank you. That’s very sweet of you.”

Before Y/N can stop herself, she reaches out to grab Harry’s hand. Immediately she feels his energy transfer to her and without thinking, Y/N flicks her finger out of force of habit. The beautifully potted Pothos that Harry has sitting on his television stand instantly droops, leaves turning brown and wilted. 

Harry’s completely perplexed.

The first thing he notices is that he’s feeling better. Great, even. He feels as good as he felt after the interaction he had with Y/N in the Greek food place all those weeks ago. The next thing he notices is that his gorgeous Pothos, a plant that is nearly impossible to kill, is dead.

And it was all Y/N’s doing.

. ⋅ ˚̣- : ✧ : – ⭒ ⊹ ⭒ – : ✧ : -˚̣⋅ .

please let me know what you thought!

[livinginncity]

if we were human

♚: lee rang x reader

❡: fluff??(angst, pure angst)

ⱳƈ: 2.5k

⚠︎: besides it being really bad? none really. like, literally a couple swears. it was fluff, and then it became angst, so...sorry, but not really because if i’m crying, so are you.

children could be heard all around the park. some screaming and laughing as they run behind, others crying after they tripped, only to soon be comforted by the gentle holds and hushed assurances of their mothers and fathers. a bit further away was a small dog park, from which came all kinds of barks and growl, as well as cooing of the passerby. and there at a bench, located slightly closer to the swings and slides attracting the younger humans, sat a man that looked less than pleased to be where he was.

“Guess who.” a female’s voice rang out as a soft hand covered his eyes. he merely rolled his eyes beneath their new coverings and proceeded to drag the small wrist away from his face. “y/n.”

the young woman sneered and scoffed before yanking her hand out of his grasp to walk around and join him on the bench. “I don’t like you.”

“I don’t like you either.” a smack to the back of the man’s head could be felt soon after the words left his mouth. “Yah!”

“What are you doing here anyway? I never took you for the people watching type.”

“That's because I'm not. As if they deserve that much attention.” a hand lazily lifted in the direction of a familiar little boy, the action bringing a smile to the woman’s face.

“Ahhhh. But that one’s the exception? I thought you didn’t like little kids with runny noses, something I heard you have in common with your brother actually. Is that a gumiho thing or a family thing?” the man she addressed turned his head to look at her with an unimpressed look.

“Has anyone ever told you that you talk too much? Or that you ask too many questions?”

“Well considering that was one of the first things you said to me when we met, I’ll just assume you know the answer to that already.”

she turned to look where the man’s gaze had previously been fixed and he followed suit. their eyes moved as they followed the movements of the young boy whose energy seemed to rival that of a puppy’s. ‘how fitting’ was the thought that came to the pair. minutes passed before they changed positions—the girl moving to settle her head on her company’s shoulder. said company shook her off before she repeated the action, leaving her be the second time. and he stayed in place even after she dragged his head to rest upon her own.

“Rang-ah.” the man simply grunted in response, urging her to continue. “I hate this.”

his eyebrows furrowed slightly at the sudden proclamation. “The kids? The families? Parks? I don’t really like them either. The first are messy and demanding, the second is an extremely unrealistic dynamic, and the last are way too loud and crowded.”

“No.” she took in her surroundings before speaking again. “This. I love all of this. I want it all. The kids are adorable and it feels so rewarding to be someone they rely on and look up to. I’ve had my fair share of family drama, but I’ve always wanted my own that I could cherish—pointless fights and all. And parks are probably one of my favorite places because it gives me everything I need to imagine what it’d be like if I had the first two.”

“What?” at her words he lifted his head to look down at her.

“I hate all of this shit that’s going on right now. It was one thing when you were just this occasional menace to your brother, but now the Imugi is involved and Lee Yeon refuses to let Ji Ah go again. It’s caused so many problems and with them, questions to be asked. Things could be so much simpler. Don’t you ever think about what life would be like if we were all human? This would all just be some petty high school drama. Like, Lee Yeon got class president in school and now, years later, both he and Imugi are CEOs competing in the nightclub industry or something like that.”

“You’re starting to sound like Lee Yeon. I guess you’re just as lame as him. Or maybe even lamer because really? That’s the best you can do with this fake drama?”

“Did I ever tell you that I ran into Soo Ho before you got the Tiger’s Brow back from him?” she ignored the questions, but her own annoyed him slightly. before he could respond. “I asked him if I could try them on and walked to the nearest window I could see myself in.”

“So, what’d you see? What were you? A Snake? A rat? Pufferfish?” her only response to his teasing was a pinch to the side. she shook her head before continuing.

“I saw a child.” her face changed to a solemn one. “All I saw was a snot-nosed little kid that the world seemed to have it out for. I didn’t even live long enough to have many firsts. And no one was ever there for the few I did. Well, there was one. Towards the end, I think my final year, I met an old lady. She lived alone, but she took me in the moment we crossed paths. She gave me my own room, let me help her cook, as much as a child could help, and she would always tell me these stories of her husband who had passed about a decade before. In just a few months, that woman gave me what felt like a lifetime of love. All while I was slowly dying, she made me forget the hardships, the neglect, the hatred, and by some cruel fate, she died first. But before she went, she said to me “treat my death as not another result of this terrible world, but take it as a sign that even when we know that our end is inescapable, we are able to cherish the temporary moments in which we are truly happy should we allow ourselves that much.” And so,”

the woman finally lifted her head from the gumiho’s shoulder to look into his eyes. “I think, if I could be reincarnated as a human again, I would. But since it’s probably never gonna happen I want to live like one. Get married, have a family, get mad when someone doesn’t show up for the holidays. I don’t know if I’d make it as a human with everything I know now, and I honestly don’t want to be human right-right now because I probably wouldn’t get to be around you. And I also just can’t imagine how you’d get by without seeing me every day.”

“Don’t act like you’re anything special.” he scoffed and looked back at the playground.

“You don’t have to admit it.” she stood up from the bench, looked over to the young boy he had taken in, and turned back. the woman grabbed his face and, after looking at the man for a few seconds, leaned in. “I know you love me.” and then she ran. “Soo Ho-ah! Let me play with you, that old fox is being mean again!”

“Yah!” he didn’t get up to chase her. she was right no matter how much he thought about it. somehow that weird girl wormed her way into the list of people he more than tolerated. and as he sat alone with his thoughts, he watched her play with the reincarnated boy, the latter seemingly winning their current sword fight.

does he ever wanna be human? no, it seems way too boring. does he like kids? he likes one, so that’s good enough. will he get married at some point? well, it’s just some rings and paper. and it’s not like he isn’t in love with that girl in the park.

bonus;

“Hey, y/n. If you’re watching this then...you know. I figured a couple good deeds might do me well in the afterlife, so what better way than finally letting my brother be with the girl he’s waited hundreds of years for.”

“You crazy bastard.” those were the only words that she could force her mouth to speak as she looked down at the small screen.

“I know you’re probably cursing me right now, thinking ‘this crazy bastard.’” somehow they both managed to let out a chuckle. “You know I don’t like vulgar words, but I’m not there, so i told Soo-Ho to pinch you for me every time one leaves your mouth.”

“Of course you did. It’s already a habit of his now.”

“I’m sorry I didn’t get to say goodbye. Especially to you, Yu Ri, and Soo-Ho. I didn’t get to say thank you, either. You’ve all helped me more than I’d ever care to admit, but I really am grateful to have shared part of my life with you. I got to help Yu Ri like Lee Yeon helped me, got to meet Blacky again, and I got to experience so many things with you.”

the tears in her eyes were already brimming and it was clear they wouldn’t stay there long. “y/n.” she looked back to the screen as he called her name.

“go to the nightstand on the right of my bed and open the drawer.” the girl got up from her place at the edge of the bed and walked over to the wooden table. with her phone in her left, she used her right to open the drawer, and she could feel her heartbeat stutter as she laid her sights on the black velvet box that sat in it. she reached a shaky hand to pick it up, and when she flipped it open she couldn’t help dropping the phone as she brought the other to her mouth with a choked sob. all she could do was shake her head and let the tears subject themselves to gravity.

“Do you remember that day in the park?” despite not being able to actually see through the endlessly flowing tears, she managed to scramble around and find the device that had slipped from her grasp. “You were talking about all this stuff like marriage, family, kids—what it’d be like to be human because things would be so much simpler. And while I don’t think anyone could ever convince me that being human would be fun, I figured we could at least do some of those human things. We were kind of halfway there, you know? You practically live in my apartment, and Soo-Ho took over the living room with his toys, so it was only a matter of time for him to get his own room so I could stop stepping on legos—maybe get a door with a lock from the outside so I don’t have to worry about waking up covered in stickers.”

she laughed as she recalled the memory, his interactions with the little boy, and their goofy smiles when things were calm for once. “You dorks were made to follow each other into every life.”

“I was gonna propose to you after this whole thing was over. Once I knew Lee Yeon was safe and not being targeted by a wannabe dragon. I’m sorry I couldn’t give that to you or...our own kid, though I think the one we have now is pretty great. And I’m also really sorry that I’m finally telling you this once it’s too late, but you were right. About what you said that day.” her breath hitched as she saw the tears glisten while they slid down his face. “I love you.

as if it were clockwork, a sob made its way from her throat and the tears began again.

“Yah, stop crying already. Please. I’d be upset if I was the cause of it.” and she tried, she really did, but it wasn’t as easy as he made it sound. “And, I know this is probably asking a lot for all that I’ve put you through, but can you wear it? At least for a little bit. Just think of it as a way of honoring my memory—the better parts obviously. You can keep my apartment if you want, too. Soo-Ho might be a job better-fit for Sin-Ju and Yu Ri, but if he says he wants to stay with you, you better let him.”

another laugh emitted from between the sobs as she listened to his final message.

“I really do love you, y/n. And if there is ever a chance of us finding each other again, I’ll tell you every chance I get. Anyway, I think it’s time for me to go now. I only have a couple more minutes and I don’t think the others are gonna make it in time. I’m scared if I’m being honest, y/n. I’m afraid of being alone, but you helped me not feel like that all the way up to the end—I finally had a family. So thank you. Love you.” and he smiled his big, child-like smile before adding on, “And don’t tell Lee Yeon I said sorry, or thank you, or I love you that much in under ten minutes.”

and just like that, it was over. no more, dumb family feuds, no more naengmyeon with no eggs because someone would always steal it, no more Lee Rang. she stared at the paused screen for what felt like hours before setting it to the side on the bed, to do as he had asked. carefully,  she took the ring out from the safety of its cushions and slid it onto her left hand. she let out a shaky breath as she stared at her ring finger and she said it back, hoping that somehow, someway, he would hear it. “I love you too, Lee Rang-ah.”

it was a while before she moved from that spot—getting on her feet only to answer the door that had just rung. opening it, she could have seen the man who had taken the place of Lee Rang’s in the living world, but all she saw at that moment was an older brother who had also lost someone he loved.

“Lee Yeon-ah.” it was then that the male finally took in her appearance. she wore jeans, one of his brother’s sweaters, and her hair was in a bun that had clearly seen better days. but what really caught his attention as his eyes traveled, was the black box in her right hand, and shining silver band on her left. then he lifted his eyes back to hers to see just how tired she was. “Lee Yeon-ah. I miss him.”

the man simply brought her into his chest as she sobbed. and she cried, and she cried, and all the while he stood there with her in his embrace. it was all he could do, he couldn’t offer her words of comfort just yet because, even now she may be much stronger than he is. because she’s strong enough to live without the promise of his reincarnation. she knows she may never see him again, but won’t risk exchanging her life just so he won’t go through the same thing.

“I miss him so much.” her voice cracked as the words came out, and he ran his hand over her hair.

“I know, I know. I miss him, too.”

[shinsouskitten]

Hey Kat🤗 I was wondering if you could write about Bakugou, Shinsou, or Hawks meeting the reader’s family and something goes wrong and they don’t like them at first. Or possibly the parents think they are a negative influence on the reader.

Hey hey hey

I asked my mom how she’d react if I was dating someone she didn't like and she rlly just said “you wouldn’t be dating them if i didn’t like them”

like damn sis okay chile

Warnings: does it count as angst if the parents are the ones being mean? if so, there’s angst, but also fluff, bakugou is bakugou

---

💥 Katsuki Bakugou:

It wasn’t the best first meeting. You had planned to introduce your long term boyfriend to your family at your own pace, but of course the villains of the city had other plans. 

You were on a date, en route to the cinema to catch a new movie amidst Bakugou’s insistence that it was a ‘stupid unrealistic movie’. Mere metres from the entrance a villain came rushing past, a handful of gold jewelry in his arms. He pushed you to the side in order to keep running, which of course enraged Bakugou, who immediately took off after the villain, completely oblivious to the sirens following his path. 

Unsurprisingly he caught him within moments, but what you hadn’t realized was that all the events had been caught by your dad, standing on the other side of the street. Your dad knew you had a partner, and he knew that they were a hero, given you cancelled every opportunity to meet with the excuse of ‘another villain attack’. What he hadn't expected, however, was for your partner to be possibly his least favorite hero currently climbing the ranks. 

Later that night, after your forfeit on the movie date in favour of a much more simple date with your bed, you had a series of texts from your parents. 

So, Ground Zero is the partner we’ve heard so little about?

He’s a bit aggressive, isn’t he?

You should’ve told us sooner.

We just don’t want you getting hurt.

That had been the moment you were waiting for. Anyone who didn’t know Bakugou (and a few who did) would describe him as a never ending pool of anger, too aggressive to be a hero and too mean to be a good partner. But if they knew him the same way you did, they would know that’s not always the case.

Of course he’s angry when he has to deal with stupid villains interrupting every date he plans, or news reporters crowding him like an animal in a zoo whenever they got the chance. But he was different with you, more relaxed. He didn’t exactly express his emotions in the best ways, but he loved you, and he’d never hurt you.

Your parents practically demanded a meeting the next day, and blatantly refused to accept any excuses of villain attacks or the like. The meeting was awkward, with your father almost attempting to provoke Bakugou simply to prove a point, but your boyfriend knew this. He put on a good face, masking his worry and anger with an uncharacteristically kind attitude and baffling you all.

Maybe he’d changed his ways. Or at least, that was the conclusion your parents came to by the end of the night, wishing you well as you made your way home. You fought the urge to laugh at Bakugou’s sudden change once your parents left his view, and held back a smile throughout his mutterings of ‘stupid extras’.

He kept up appearances for long enough, but by the time your parents noticed it was a farce, they realized there was nothing they could do to stop the love you held for each other. After all, he may be an ass, but he’d never hurt you.

---

💜 Hitoshi Shinsou:

Shinsou, on the other hand, wanted to meet your family pretty quickly. If anything, just to get it out of the way, but there was a part of him that wanted the validation that he was good enough for you. Sometimes he just didn’t feel like he was, so if your parents liked him, it’d definitely be a weight off his shoulders.

The two of you picked out a nice restaurant, keeping in mind your parents favorite foods in an attempt to butter them up, then send them a text asking you to meet you and Shinsou for dinner. They replied eagerly, especially when you mentioned the two of you were covering the bill. 

You arrived first, giving your name at the door and sitting down on the plush leather anxiously awaiting the arrival of your parents. When you finally saw them, the two of you stood up to greet them, you offering hugs while Shinsou held out his hand with a smile. 

“It’s nice to meet you.” He said.

Your parents nodded, a false replica of a smile on their faces as they ignored Shinsou’s hand.

The air around you was thick, no one willing to be the first to break the uncomfortable silence, until you eventually suggested you all sit down. You made a mental note to tip your waiter extra when the night was over. It was clear they could sense the awkwardness, and thank the lord they came over at the exact moments you feared a bomb might explode.

The meals went down perfectly, but the atmosphere made it difficult to enjoy anything. Your parents spoke little, and when they did, it was always to you, almost as if Shinsou wasn’t even present. 

To be truly honest, he’d expected this reaction, although he hoped he was just overthinking. He knew people didn’t react to his quirk well, and there were many misconceptions about how much he used it. He had hoped your parents hadn’t been so quick to judge.

By the time your waiter delivered your check, you were ready to curl up in your bed and not emerge for a good few weeks. The four of you walked to the door silently, but before you could wish them goodnight, Shinsou spoke up, his hand holding yours tightly as he faced your parents.

“I just want you to know, whether you like me or not, I love Y/n more than anything, and I would never do anything to hurt them. I will protect them until my last breath, and I hope that we can sort out any differences with time.”

Did he really just confess his love to you in front of your parents? Yup. Well, at least it seemed to get a response this time, as your dad replied:

“I should hope you do.” Your dad held out his hand, and Shinsou took it a bit more than happily. “Or I’ll kill you myself.”

Shinsou laughed awkwardly, not sure whether to be scared at your dad's threat or not, especially when he ended it without another word, turning and walking towards their car. 

I mean at least he spoke to him, right? That’s an improvement?

Either way, Shinsou quickly realized in reality the only opinion that mattered to him, was yours. 

oof having a good dad who cares about you? couldnt be me. also i absolutely hate this one and idk why, but shinsou’s my bby and i feel i disappointed him

---

🍗 Keigo Takami (Hawks):

The meeting was almost completely by chance. Keigo often took you on sky-high (not mile-high get your minds outta the gutters ppl) trips on his off days, and while flying one day, you saw your parents' house from the clouds. They hadn’t met Keigo yet, so you suggested that you pop in for a moment. He agreed, and in seconds, you were standing on their porch, hand raised high to ring the doorbell.

Your mother opened the door, surprised to see you, and even more surprised to see the bird standing behind you. Nevertheless she invited you both in, and as your father called Keigo over, your mother pulled you to one side, whispering quiet enough that the two men wouldn’t hear her. 

“The news says he’s a bit of a playboy.” You said.

“The news says a lot of things.” You rolled your eyes. 

“And his fans?” She asked.

“What about them?” You replied.

“Well,” she paused, “he can get a little friendly with them, don’t you think.”

You sighed. Your mother wasn’t the first person to bring up Keigo’s fans when discussing your relationship, but you knew that in reality, he couldn’t be bothered with the swarms of people throwing themselves at his feet when he had you waiting for him at home. 

“He’s a friendly person.” You shrugged.

“You don’t really believe that, do you?”

“Just say what you want to, mom.” You rounded on her, the heightened volume of your voice drawing Keigo’s attention from the other side of the room. “Say it. Go on.”

She glanced around, seeing both Keigo and your father now watching the two of you. 

“Fine.” You continued. “I know he has hundreds of fans who would kill to be in his bed at night. But you know what? He’s not there. He’s with me, watching crappy tv and binge eating kfc (CANNIBALISM). If you don’t like him, that’s your problem. But don’t try and convince me to do anything but love him, cause you’re not going to do it.”

Baffled, your mother stammered for a response, but you weren’t about to wait for one.

“C’mon Keigo,” you called, “we’re leaving.”

He was next to you in moments, and you grabbed his hand to pull him out of the house, stopping only when you were satisfied you were out of sight of your parents. 

“So, kid…” He looked across at you with a smirk, wrapping an arm around your waist as he lay his chin on your shoulder. “You love me?”

“Shut up bird brain.”

again i hate this but where my baby birds at?

[skullsandwineglasses]

You Are My Hero (2021) Review

Overall impression: The drama started off really cute and promising in the first half, but was weak and underwhelming in the second half. In-depth review below (with spoilers).

A cute and fluffy romance premise

Right off the bat, the love story between the leads is tropey as hell, but manages to not be tacky and is actually really endearing. The ML, a SWAT officer, rescues the FL, an aspiring neurosurgery medical resident, from a bank robbery 2 years ago. They leave a lasting impression on each other, but don't keep in touch afterwards. The FL never sees his face because he's wearing a mask, but the ML remembers her name. 

Fate brings them together again 2 years later when the FL enrolls in an emergency rescue training camp that’s supervised by the ML. He recognizes her and falls for her immediately, but she doesn’t know he’s the one who rescued her years ago. 

Their relationship starts off rocky, similar to how a CEO romance would start: the ML first appears cold and distanced, strict and brooding, but actually has a huge soft spot for the FL. The FL is put off by his coldness, but is sometimes surprised as random moments of tenderness. When the training camp is complete, the ML becomes a cute and awkward lovesick puppy who tries to figure out how to woo the FL because this is his first time (and hers) falling in love. It’s fun seeing him become so flustered around her when he’s usually so calm, collected, and in control as the leader of a SWAT team. 

On other hand, the FL slow falls for the ML when he reveals a more real and vulnerable side of himself. They banter a lot, but she slowly warms up to him. 

And as a no-nonsense drama, the two leads acknowledge their feelings for each other quickly (although they haven't directly admitted it to each other yet). They're in the awkward phase of attraction and going on semi-dates, but they haven't defined the relationship yet. *Sigh* First love. 

Things I enjoyed

I appreciate that although the FL is a Mary Sue, she does make mistakes. She's smart, but she isn't the top of her class. She’s kind and selfless, but she also isn’t overly tolerant of people. When people overstep their boundaries and are unjust to her, she’ll confront them. Ma Sichun is such a natural actress. She can do cute and flirty, she can be clueless and lost, she can be confident and in control, she can be angry and indignant. I especially loved her character’s adorable interactions with her best friend Xiao Xia. 

The acting in this drama was all around great. It’s probably the best part of the drama. It was so comfortable and fun to watch. I think AvenueX described it best: the acting in the drama was so natural that sometimes it felt like the actors broke character but the director kept the take. Some of the laughing, giggling, and gestures felt so genuine that you wonder if it was improvised, scripted, or a blooper scene that became canon.

I like how the FL and ML are each experts in their respective fields. They have very separate careers that occasionally intersect. I'm tired of CEO dramas where the FL is working for the ML, or there are class differences between them. Instead in this drama, the FL faces problems everyday at work that the ML doesn't know about. Her problems do not relate to him at all. She has problems that he can't understand or help with. Likewise, he also goes on missions that she isn't aware of. They work in completely different fields with different skill sets. They even talk about how their philosophies differ. Her job is to save lives but not make moral judgments of character, while his job is to enforce the law, which is all about assessing character. Where their careers do intersect, is the goal of saving others and putting others first before themselves. 

Another dynamic of the relationship that I really like is that the FL and ML are always occupied and on the move because of their professions, and yet, their loyalty and devotion to each other never change. They are each other's rock. Despite encountering so many different situations and people, despite all of the chaos and noise from their careers, nothing can really outweigh how important they are to each other. Despite being out in the field, far away from home, their hearts are anchored to each other. I just like this trope a lot, i.e., the trope of being away from home, but remaining true and loyal and unwavering. Despite having bigger and more important things in the world to deal with, their ultimate dream is wanting to just spend some time together. It's analogous to how in ancient period dramas, there are generals who command armies and and maintain a strictly professional demeanor and don't mention a word about their family to their soldiers, but when the general retires to his tent at night, he's writing a long and thoughtful letter home, because his loved one was on his mind all day. 

The supporting characters are great, but I do like the older and mature supporting couple (Xing Ke Yao and Shao Yu Han) more than the younger supporting couple (Xiao Xia and Shu When Bo), despite the actors playing the younger couple being literally my age. I also appreciate how the FL has multiple close friends who are quite separate from each other, instead of just the single token sidekick best friend (although the second half of the drama does just focus on one of her main friends). It's relatable because we all have different groups of friends. We have friends from high school, we have friends from college, and we have friends from work. Most of these friends are kept separate, and sometimes they interact. But I like how this drama shows that the FL has a small network of friends from different walks of life. 

Things I didn’t enjoy as much

The plot derailed and lost its charm after episode 30. There were fewer hospital cases, and the ML had to complete a mission that I had no interest in following. There was no other point to the superfluous mission besides to show that the ML has a busy and demanding job that prevents him from being at the FL’s side when she needs him the most. 

I also really, really disliked the introduction of the random love rival in episode 31 just to try to stir some angst. The plot device was pointless because in the end, there was no angst because the leads have a strong and healthy relationship, and so the love rival’s attempt at sabotaging the relationship was just laughable and completely random. It just disrupted the mood and pacing of the drama because that plotline just came out of the blue. It was just so annoying seeing the love rival and her sister cause trouble and wreak havoc in the FL’s workplace. 

The drama did a good job at showing how the leads put their careers first, which caused strain and tension in their relationship that they tend to ignore. But, the drama never explores this further, even though it’s a very real problem that many career-driven and ambitious couples face. The drama presents a very idealized vision of a relationship between a police officer and a doctor. Like when the FL leaves for a special research and training program in the States, the drama shows that the leads breezed through the two-year long distance relationship in a quick montage. They had no issue in communication. Yes, they miss each other, but they’re blissful. But what kind of long distance relationship has no bumps in it? The drama also implies that they never saw each other in person during two years (in the final episode, Xing Ke Lei squeezed her arms and said that since they haven’t seen each other in 2 years, he had to check if she was missing anything), which is highly unrealistic. Was she never able to go back home for the holidays? Did Xing Ke Lei, whose parents live and work overseas, never bother to visit his girlfriend? Overall, it seemed a little off to me that despite the budding tension and issues they’ve been having between them, they were able to overcome a long distance relationship so easily. You could argue that they’re used to long separations because of their work, and the drama has shown that they’re used to communicating over video calls, but I was just a little disappointed that they rushed this final plotline when so much more could have been done with it. 

Speaking of parents, we never actually got to see their parents. I understand that the parents are not relevant to the focus of the story, but the parents are rarely even mentioned, which further makes the romance in the story seem too idealistic. Whether it’s a near-death situation, getting engaged, or studying abroad for 2 years, the FL never mentions talking to her parents about these decisions and life changes. The drama handwaves the parents’ absence and lack of influence by having the FL mention early in the drama that her parents are busy with their business back home, so they don’t have time to worry about her. She also no longer bothers to update them about her work because she’s afraid they’ll be worried about her. And then from there, we never hear the FL mention her parents again. It’s just so weird to see that the most important person in her life is the ML and she only ever talks about major life choices with her friends. I mean, if the plot had said that she didn’t have a family, it wouldn’t have mattered. But the fact that she does mention her parents, but they’re completely absent and non-existent just felt a little off, like something was missing. But in the grand scheme of things, this is not really an issue. I’m just nit-picking. 

Lastly, I just want to comment on Bai Jingting as Xing Ke Lei. I admit that he sells the part well. At first I was skeptical about Bai Jingting as a SWAT officer because of how skinny and baby-faced he is, but he actually pulls it off surprisingly well and has some unexpectedly good chemistry with Ma Sichun too. Although during moments when he isn't talking and we're just left with his resting face, I'm suddenly hit by how young he looks, but then he speaks or is back in uniform and again, the gestalt shift goes back to Xing Ke Lei, the handsome SWAT officer. They made a point of showing how muscled his arms are, which was a little jarring to see in comparison to his youthful face, not gonna lie. So, while I liked him as Xing Ke Lei, it was a little distracting switching back and forth between seeing him as a really young, adolescent-looking actor, and him as the broad-chested character. 

Should you watch?

All in all, a really cute and easy-to-watch drama with some thoughtful and sentimental moments. Very fluffy. Minimal to no misunderstandings. Charming characters. There are the storylines of three couples with medical/police subplots interweaved between the romance. On bilibili, some people even edited clips of the drama with theme songs from TVB medical and police dramas like The Hippocractic Crush and Tiger Cubs. So, as someone who grew up with TVB dramas, it was nostalgic to see those thematic parallels. 

But, the drama does lose steam in the last 10 or so episodes, and has a lot of filler to stretch it out to 40 episodes. That’s the issue I have with modern dramas. The plot in modern dramas is usually quite basic, and I would argue that the modern romance is easier and less angsty. You either love each other or you don’t. You either are willing to commit or you’re not. There aren’t many external excuses for angst or misunderstandings. (Of course, I’m trivializing things; real life isn’t as easy). 

Still, I would recommend this drama for anyone who’s between dramas. I watched this drama to help me get over the rut I was in because I was going through withdrawal after finishing The Rebel Princess, so I needed a light-hearted drama whose genre was completely different from TRP. And this drama was perfect for breaking that rut. 

Rating: 8/10. Simple, fluffy, and not too much to complain about. I also forgot to talk about the great humour in the drama, but there were many moments when I laughed out loud or couldn’t stop grinning. This is also a drama you can take your time with because there aren’t constant cliff hangers to peg you on. It doesn’t consume your life, and you can pause (although, the first 18 or so episodes are definitely binge-worthy because the development of the leads’ relationship is just too cute, and so they suck you right in). However, while it is one of the better modern romance dramas I’ve watched (and the characters are very consistent), it’s not a very memorable drama. It doesn’t make me linger. I guess it’s because I’m more of a historical and xianxia drama kind of person. So take from that what you will. 

[asthmark]

❝ among the stars ❞ l.mk

synopsis → “Would you be willing to give me the amulet, my prince? Or will I have to rip it off you?”

word count → 6.9k

a/n → when i say i cannot believe i did this i MEAN THAT like i started this in FEBRUARY and here we are, wow! ok on a real note i’m not proofreading because, like always, it is 4 in the morning and i want to get 3 hours of sleep at the very least D: anyway i’ll rest well knowing this is done so plz enjoy!

“Do you ever get tired of looking for a treasure that could be fake for all we know? ‘Cause I sure do.”

“Quiet.”

You slouch down in your seat. “So mean, captain.”

Taeyong turns to glare at you, hoping it’ll get rid of the smirk on your face. “This mission is hard enough on its own, your commentary doesn’t make it any easier.”

You roll your eyes. “Would you rather we just sit here in complete silence ‘til we find the… gem or jewel or whatever it is?”

“It’s an amulet,” Taeyong corrects. “And yes, definitely.”

“Would you two knock it off?” says Jaehyun from the passenger’s seat.

“I say let them go at it,” Yuta murmurs, staring out the window, into the vast galaxy.

Jaehyun raises a brow. “Is watching your teammates argue amusing to you?”

Yuta shrugs. ‘We’re in the middle of space, what else is going to entertain me?”

You see Taeyong's grip on the steering wheel tighten. He was serious about this mission. His team? Not so much. The only person who seemed to back him up on everything was Jaehyun but that was given seeing how he was his second in command.

“Yuta.” Jaehyun's tone could rival a disappointed mother’s. “Could you at least try and be a little professional?”

The redhead scoffs. “There's nothing professional about this team. We’re a bunch of criminals.”

That was true. You all had bounties over your heads, a consequence for having committed countless crimes all over the galaxy. Taeyong was probably the one that was most serious about what he did, always doing things with vigor and determination, no matter how illegal it was. Jaehyun was the same way although he was a little more detail-oriented, focusing on little things rather than the big picture. He always polished Taeyong’s plans to perfection. They made a great duo and, in fact, for a while it had just been the two of them. Then they realized they needed a team to be able to execute their ambitious plans.

That’s where the rest of you came in.

They had told you they found Johnny first. That was no surprise. He was tall and muscular, impossible to miss. If Taeyong and Jaehyun were the brains, he was definitely the brawn. When they had first met, Johnny was doing nothing but getting in fights. He was always the bigger man, he always won. It seemed to give him a rush, defeating his opponent with ease. Taeyong and Jaehyun stroked his ego to no end, telling him he would be a perfect addition to the team they were forming. The praise was enough to convince him to join.

They found Yuta second but you were never told the full story. From what you had gathered, he had attempted to pickpocket Taeyong. You had no idea how that would've led to him joining the team but you found it incredibly hilarious. You assumed your relentless teasing was the reason why Taeyong wouldn’t tell you about it but it didn’t matter to you; everytime Yuta references it, you still laugh.

Lastly, there was you.

Meeting the boys was probably the most memorable thing that had happened to you. You still remember how Taeyong had wordlessly walked into the gas station—where you were working at the time—and held you at gunpoint with his face shielded only by a black ski mask. Before he could even demand you give him all the cash in the register, a dark blue haired male had rushed in. You can still remember the sequence of events like it was yesterday.

“Taeyong, what do you think you’re doing?”  

“I thought I told you to stay on the ship, Jaehyun! And where’s your mask?”

Jaehyun ignores the second question. “I thought we had agreed to always form a plan before we steal something!”

Their argument is cut short by the bell on the door ringing as a tall, brunette male and a shorter bleach-blonde enter. You catch the way Taeyong sighs, “you have got to be kidding me” under his breath.

“Hey, Taeyong? Yuta and I were wondering if you could buy us some snacks.”

“Johnny and I have been on our best behavior so you owe us.”

“Jesus Christ.” Taeyong pinches the bridge of his nose over the fabric of the mask. “This is you on your best behavior? Interrupting my robbery for some snacks? The plan was I come in here, get the money, and you all thank me for being a good leader!”

“No wonder you need my help making plans, they're so unrealistic,” Jaehyun mutters.

Taeyong shoots him a glare. “Look, we’re running low on fuel, we barely even made it here. I thought if I acted fast I could just get the money and we'd be on our way.”

“Let’s just try that corner store a couple galaxies over. The guy behind the cash register is young. You think that kid will really say no to us?”

“That’s low.”

“Hasn't stopped us before.”

“I’m with Johnny. It'll be hilarious to see him pissing his pants the second Taeyong aims a gun at his head. Easy money.”

“You guys need serious help.”

“And yet you still hired us.”

“I’ll give you the money.”

Your statement ends the bickering between the four males. They stare at you in bewilderment and they’re stunned into silence as if they’re certain you’re pulling their legs. To prove yourself, you spin around and grab a brown paper bag that you usually used to put the customer’s liquor in and begin stuffing it full with all that was in the register.

You hear them whispering and mumbling but you just continue bagging the money as calmly as you would groceries. It takes only a couple seconds before the brown bag is overflowing with the pink bills that were only valid currency on the planet you were on. You wordlessly hand it to Taeyong.

He grabs it, holding it close to his chest and peering down at it, his eyes seeming to widen the longer it was in his arms. Jaehyun’s eyes darted between you and the bag like he was waiting for some sort of catch. Yuta and Johnny both cracked a smile, as if the unforeseen chain of events was comical to them.  

“Happy?” you ask.

They all turn to you, the look in their eyes still skeptical but Taeyong, ever the leader, speaks for the team and gives you a nod.

“Good. Now I get to come with you.”

Johnny is the first to react, erupting into long and hard laughter. “Is that seriously what you want in return? To join a group of outlaws and run from the police?”

You give him a firm nod.

His laughter dies down. “Whatever you say. It’s your life, babe.”

You all watch as he walks out of the gas station, putting his shades on (despite it being pitch dark outside) and you’re sure he must feel like a million bucks knowing that you actually wanted to stick around them.

You turn back to the three others. Yuta grabs a handful of snacks from the shelf behind him, cradling the assortment of sweets, chips, and more. “Can I take these?”

You shrug. “Go for it.”

He smiles and you can't help but notice it’s healing aura. “Good to have you on the team.” He also makes way for the door.

You’re almost positive that his willingness to have you join their group came solely from you granting him permission to take the food.

Taeyong is the next to leave and he does it silently, offering you nothing but a small smile as he held the bag of money as tightly as he could and used the side of his arm to push the door open.

“Why do you want to come with us?”

You turn to Jaehyun. It was just you and him. By staying back he had once again proved to be the only one who truly thought things through.

“Believe it or not, robbing gas stations seems better than picking up another late shift for a lazy coworker on this dull planet. The thrill is a bonus.”

You catch a pair of dimples appearing on his cheeks. ��Yeah, well with that thrill comes three idiots, myself excluded.”

“I’ll manage.”

“In that case, welcome to the crew.”

“It doesn’t matter that we’re criminals!” Jaehyun shouts, bringing your attention back to reality. “That doesn't mean you get to be a pain in my—”

“Hey!” All of a sudden, the door that leads into the cockpit slides open and Johnny’s head pops in. “I need a new toothbrush. Can we stop by a gas station or something?”

“Just use hers.” Yuta jabs his thumb in your direction. “Work’s for me.”

“Wait, what?” you ask, mouth agape. “You better be joking.”

He just shoots you a smile, displaying his pearly whites, as if to tease you. You whine and make a face that expresses all your disgust.

“Relax, I rinse it off when I’m done like, almost every time.”

“Almost?”

Taeyong speaks up before you can go off on Yuta. “Alright! Next stop, gas station!”

Your ship lands on a nearby planet and when you land, you can’t help but gaze out the window in awe, the luxurious ships and opulent buildings catching you off guard. Even the people that cruise down the streets—that practically shone and didn’t have a trace of litter—are draped in flashy clothing.

”We’re gonna look so out of place,” you grumble to yourself but Yuta’s ears pick up on the comment.

“Cheer up.” He points to the civilians below you. “Just think about how easy they’re gonna be to pickpocket.”

“No pickpocketing.”

A chorus of displeased groans fill the ship. You notice that even Jaehyun seems a little bummed out by Taeyong’s reprimand.

“We’re only here to get what we need. The amulet is our top priority, remember?”

Yuta unbuckles his seatbelt. “The amulet is your top priority. Mine is stealing some filthy rich dude’s fancy watch.”

“Well, just think about how much the amulet is worth. You’ll be able to have all the stupid watches in the world.”

“Yeah, once we find it.”

Johnny’s comment reminds each and every one of you of your current struggle—actually locating the amulet. It was undeniable that finding the treasure’s whereabouts had been your biggest obstacle so far. In fact, the idea of it being nonexistent had been tossed around, much to your captain’s displeasure. In fact, the only reason any of you had heard about this item was because of Taeyong.

According to his grandfather’s tales, it was so valuable that it could turn someone from rags to riches but the mystery of where it was prevented him from finding it himself. It was clear the amulet was something special to Taeyong and his dedication to attaining it was probably sparked by his grandfather’s own desire to do so and only fueled by his death.

He was always on the hunt for it, resulting in the rest of you doing the same, even if you didn’t match his vigor. You scoured the galaxies in pursuit of it but Taeyong’s determination never once faltered.

“Just get in and get out,” Jaehyun commands, siding with Taeyong, as per usual. “We’ll stay here with the ship.”

“Are you afraid someone’s gonna steal it?” Johnny teases, standing from his seat. “Because I wouldn’t worry about it.”

You snicker. “What a polite way to say it’s a hunk of junk.”

“Might I remind you that someone begged to be on this,” Taeyong makes sure to make in-air quotes, “hunk of junk.”

“She was so innocent and naive back then,” sighs Jaehyun, hand placed dramatically over his chest. “What happened?”

“You guys did. Practically drove me into insanity.”

“I’m sure you would’ve gotten there yourself,” counters Johnny.

You can’t seem to argue with that so you simply shrug. “Probably.”

“Get a move on, you guys.” Taeyong stretches his limbs out as far as they can go and then comfortably places his hands behind his head with a yawn. You had never thought about how tiring piloting the ship was for him. “We’ll be waiting.”

With that, you, Johnny, and Yuta exit the ship, receiving some of the nastiest looks you’ve ever had the displeasure of seeing as soon as you step foot on the planet.

“What’s with all the staring?” you mutter as you make eye contact with a seemingly disgusted woman dressed in gold from head to toe. “You would think that with all that money they could pay for some good manners.”

Johnny agrees only mumbling, “If looks could kill.”

Yuta lets out a frustrated sigh. “All I want is something expensive. I’ll even take a ring at this point, I don’t care. How am I even supposed to get my hands on anything when everyone is too scared to get within five feet of us?”

“Guess we don’t meet their standards.”

“Having that amulet would come in handy right about now,” you comment.

Johnny snorts. “Oh. Right. The prized amulet.”

“You mean the one that only exists in grandpa’s head?”

“Say that Taeyong’s face, Yuta, I dare you.”

“No thanks. I might be stupid but I’m not an idiot. I know he’d knock me out cold.”

Johnny shakes his head. “He’s so set on finding it. I still remember the day he finally brought it up to all of us. There was this fire in his eyes. He seemed so determined that I would’ve followed him across galaxies to get the stupid thing.”

Yuta chuckles. “We all did. But it’s been, what? A year now? Seems kind of impossible at this point.”

“I wish we’d just go back to doing all the fun crimes that he and Jae would come up with when we first met. Remember those?”

You can’t help but smile at the memories, remembering the feeling of adrenaline racing through your veins as you continue listening to Johnny and Yuta talk.

“Yeah. Those were the good days. Now our lives are just a huge wild goose chase.”

“We’re here,” you announce, steering the conversation away from your misfortunes.

The three of you peer at the building before you, its windows are shiny and from the glimpse you catch of the inside, everything is stocked up and organized. The sign above it reads ‘Purveyor’ in bold letters.

“This is the closest thing they have to a gas station?” Yuta asks, mouth agape.

You nod. “I think so.”

“I don't wanna go in. Nice things scare me.”

You ignore Johnny and take the first step forward. The cashier glances up from counting money when the bell on the door rings, alerting him of your presence. He almost drops the currency when he gets a good look at you. Although, he doesn’t seem judgy. In fact, he seems more in awe with you than anything else.

You stuff your hands into your cargo pants as you awkwardly walk past him and roam the store. You hear the door open and soon enough Yuta joins you as you skim the shelves, grabbing the necessary items.

“Pick your toothbrush,” you tell him as you grab one for yourself. You had immediately gotten rid of the one you two had shared. “And please stick to it this time.”

He cracks a smile as he eyes his options. “Do they have those ones that light up? And play the songs so you know how long to brush?”

“You mean the kid ones?” You’re ready to laugh at Yuta’s joke but he seems serious enough as he nods his head, vigorously.

“Uh, well, they’re probably around here somewhere. Keep looking.” You hold back a chuckle when he goes back to searching intensely. “Which one does Johnny want?”

“Not sure, he stayed outside.”

“Oh god, he was serious about being scared?”

“Probably just wants us to do all the shopping.”

“Well, go tell him that if he doesn’t come in here and pick a toothbrush, I’ll be taking the liberty of getting him this one.” You hold up a fuschia pink one with a cute princess character on it. You assumed it was from some cartoon that was popular with the children of the planet.  

Yuta obeys and seconds later, Johnny magically appears to grab a solid blue toothbrush off the shelf and give you a glare. After grabbing a couple more items, you check out. Johnny fishes into his pocket for money, mumbling about how he knew it was in there somewhere. After much digging, he pulls out a crumpled wad of cash that you’re pretty sure isn’t even valid on the planet you’re on. He smiles proudly at you and Yuta then the cashier but the expression quickly falters.

“Wong Yukhei?”

You glance between him and the man behind the register—Yukhei, according to Johnny.

“Johnny Suh!” Yukhei’s voice is loud but filled with excitement. “I thought I recognized you! But I told myself there was no way!”

Johnny laughs, breathlessly. “I could say the same thing! What are you doing here, man?”

He casts his eyes downwards. “As soon as you left with those two guys, I realized I didn’t wanna street fight for the rest of my life either. I wanted to start over and I thought, what better place than here? So, I picked up a job at the palace—”

“Woah, woah, woah!” Johnny interrupts. “You? In a palace? Never would've seen that coming.”

Yukhei grins so wide it seems like second nature. “Don’t get ahead of yourself, I just worked as a guard.”

“That’s still something!”

“If you don’t mind me asking, what happened?”

Your question seems to bring his spirits down once again. “I quit. They kept telling me to ‘work harder’. But it was just about impossible, I was already running around like crazy for the royal family. They’re so demanding, I swear. Only person who didn’t drive me crazy was the prince.” He sighs. “I didn’t have what it took, I guess.”

“Sorry to hear that, Yukhei,” Johnny sympathizes. “You still made an effort, though.”

He nods. “Yeah. But it doesn’t always work out. So, here I am.” He forces a weak smile. “What about you?”

“I turned things around—not for the better, though.”

Yukhei raises a brow, offering you and Yuta a glance. “I’m guessing your new friends have something to do with that.”

Yuta chuckles. “Hey, he joined the team before me or her.”

“Team?” Yukhei echoes.

Johnny nods, half heartedly. “Yeah. Long story short I basically live on a ship with four fools, commit crimes, and look for imaginary treasure.”

Yukhei looks dumbfounded but his lips curve upwards in amusement. “Sounds… fun?”

This produces a laugh from Johnny. “Sometimes.”

He leans forward on the countertop, curiously. “And what’s this treasure we’re talking about?”

“Some amulet. Our guy in charge—you’ve seen him, he’s got pink hair—is wild about finding it. We’re just along for the ride.”

Yukhei nods in understanding. “I see… and this amulet, could you describe it for me?”

Johnny shares an uncertain look with you and Yuta, obviously expecting one of you to come forward. You both return his stare.

Yukhei chuckles. “Okay, lemme ask again. Could you bring me someone who can describe it?”

Not even a minute later, Taeyong has been forcibly dragged out of the ship joined by Jaehyun who insists on filling his duty of backing up the older male.

“Yukhei, this is Taeyong. Taeyong, Yukhei. Okay, now that you’re no longer strangers, can you give our friend here a quick description of your beloved amulet?”

Taeyong is taken aback by Johnny’s strange request but does so anyway. When it came to the amulet, you all knew he would do anything. “Well, it can fit inside the palm of your hand. I’ve heard it’s gorgeous, too. So gorgeous it could be mistaken for a piece of fine jewelry.”

The five of you stay silent as Taeyong continues reciting what he had heard from his grandfather so many times. Once he’s finished, you notice that there’s a satisfied expression on Yukhei’s face.

“I think I know what you’re talking about.”

Taeyong smiles at the declaration, teeth making a bright appearance. He had never met someone other than his relative that knew of this treasure. “Are you serious?”

Yukhei nods, positively sure. “Oh yeah.”

“Do you happen to know where it is?” You can hear the hope and fear in your captain’s voice. You could even feel it. The cruciality of this moment weighs in on you; this could be a turning point in your hunt or another dead end.

“It’s on this planet.”

Your entire crew stays silent, too stunned by this new piece of information to say a word so Yukhei decides to continue.

“In the palace. Around the prince’s neck.”

This is followed by another moment of silence. Each of you celebrate internally, happy to finally have found a location. All that was left was a plan. How were you going to get it in your hands? As if he’s reading your minds, Yukhei speaks up.

“I know how to get it for you, too.”

“How?” Taeyong nearly pleads.

“Johnny?” He directs his attention to the older male. “How do you feel about becoming a palace guard?”

Johnny’s face gives away his answer before his mouth has the chance—his nose scrunches up and his eyes widen ever so slightly. Taeyong stares up at him, filled with a newly found ambition. That seems to pressure Johnny into agreeing to whatever Yukhei was scheming and Taeyong must surely know it.

“I… guess I could.”

“Alright then, go to the palace immediately. They must be desperate to find a replacement for me but they’re always open to more defense. They believe in power in numbers over there, they don’t care where you’re from or who you are. They’ll settle for anyone as long as they look like they can take and give a good punch. And, you know what Johnny? You’re the strongest guy I’ve ever met. It’s impossible that they won’t hire you.”

Johnny smiles at the compliment before asking, “What do I do once I’m inside?”

“You wait. Complete the tasks they give you. Don’t make yourself stand out. Just… don’t be suspicious.” Yukhei seems pleased with the nod of understanding Johnny gives him. “Once night falls, Johnny will wait by one of the backdoors and let somebody in using the keys they’ll give him along with his armor and sword. This will make sneaking inside the palace way easier. Once that person is in, they’ll have to steer clear of any other guards and head to the prince’s room. The amulet will be wherever he is.”

Taeyong purses his lips as he thinks of a candidate to do the sneaking. “Can’t be Yuta—”

“Why not?”

“Because you’ll end up stealing stuff instead of staying focused.”

Yuta can’t seem to argue with this statement so he simply nods and keeps quiet.

“Can’t be me, I’m the getaway driver. Jae?”

Jaehyun shakes his head. “I stay with you. If we get found out, you’ll need defense.”

Five pairs of eyes end up on you and you sigh. “You don’t even have to say it. I got it.”

Taeyong places a hand on your shoulder. “Thank you.”

“Don’t mention it.” You give him a genuine smile. “What are we waiting for? Let’s get this amulet… finally.”  

You file into the ship and Yukhei joins you to serve as a guide. He tells you the ins and outs of the castle and informs you of important details as you take off. You can’t help but feel your heart thump as you listen to him. You certainly did not think you would be getting anywhere near the amulet today and yet here you were—about to break into a castle for it.

When you land nearby the palace, that anxious feeling only intensifies. You know you won’t have to do anything risky until later that night but seeing Johnny getting ready to leave makes you realize that it was really happening. You were finally going after what you had spent the last year of your lives seeking. You couldn’t afford to slip up despite all the things that could go wrong.

“Nervous?” you ask, approaching the brunette.

He runs a hand through his hair and gives you an honest shrug. “Kind of. But then I think about how good life’s gonna be once we get that amulet.”

You admire his positive outlook. You decide that you’ll match his mindset instead of bringing him down with your worries. “True. We’ve been waiting for this. It’s kind of exciting when you think about it.”

He nods. “We can do it.”

You’re sure his certainty is supposed to boost your confidence as well so you reply, “I know.”

With that, he leaves the ship, walking into the bustling streets, towards the palace Lucas has described to him. Although, he assured him it’d be impossible to miss. You watch his figure become increasingly harder to track before he disappears completely, becoming just another someone in the crowd. You back away from the window with a sigh.

All that was left to do was play the waiting game. But you had been playing it for the last year, right? What would another couple hours do?

It was true what they said about sunsets being more beautiful on certain planets. You decide that this specific planet is one of them. Everyone onboard the ship takes a pause from worrying to gaze at the sky, painted with warm oranges and yellows before setting into a cool purple and blue hue. Stars begin to appear and you see the outline of three moons in the distance. Night time was near and you would be needed on the field soon. You prayed that Johnny had successfully made it inside the palace or else your mission would be over before it even started.

“You ready to go?” asks Taeyong as you retie your laces.

You glance up at him and nod, tightening a knot. “I hope so.”

He doesn’t say another word but continues to stand above you, even when you begin to work on your other boot. You suspect he’s trying to find the proper words to tell you not to ruin this for him and simultaneously boost your morale so you stay silent. When you stand from your kneeling position, Taeyong still doesn’t say a thing. Instead, he pulls you into a tight hug.

“Please be careful.”

This is a command you certainly didn’t expect but you’re not disappointed at all. You carefully wrap your arms around him. “I will.”

“I want you back in one piece, got it, young lady?”

You feel your heart tighten along with the knot in your stomach but you only chuckle. “Yes, captain.”

The three others who sit in the cockpit yell encouragement your way and wave you off before you slip out of the ship, engulfed by the darkness. You had never been afraid of it. It was always more of an ally to you than something to fear. You were grateful—it shielded you away from everyone and everything else whenever you found yourself doing unsavory things which, for the record, was often.

You follow the path Yukhei instructed you to take. You had been ordered to go around the castle, through the nearby woods that would hide you away from any guards patrolling the perimeter. As you tried your best to dodge prickly shrubs and low hanging branches you can’t help but envy Johnny who simply had to knock at the front gates to be let in.

The prospect of seeing your friend again motivates you to keep walking. You might have secretly cursed the castle for being so large as you trudged along, your legs already starting to feel slightly sore and a thin layer of sweat forming on your forehead but you didn’t let yourself feel too discouraged. You remind yourself that Johnny is waiting for you on the fourth door behind the castle, as Yukhei had ordered. You had to make it to him.

For Taeyong.

For your team.

For you.

After what seems like an eternity, you reach the door. Just to be sure you scan it up and down. Wooden? Yes. Scratches on the bottom? Many. Rusty doorknob? Definitely. It seemed to match Yukhei’s description perfectly and if everything was going according to plan, Johnny should be right behind it as well. Without any further hesitation you knock as softly as possible. You don’t expect it to be audible but to your surprise, it opens almost immediately. His figure is poorly illuminated but you can still see the shine of Johnny’s metal armor and the reflection of a moon in his sword.

You give him a quick once over. “Looking good, John.”

He shushes you but you still manage to catch his smile. “Just get in here.”

You obey and he closes the door behind you as soon and quickly as possible. You barely get a chance to look around what you’re sure to be the nicest place you’ve ever been before Johnny’s ushering you towards a large set of stairs. You both rush up them and upon reaching the second floor he grabs you by the shoulders, forcing you to stare directly at him.

“Go left, right, down the hall, and through the door. It’ll be the last door to your right.”

He’s referring to the location of the amulet and you nod, hoping he can’t see just how nervous you are. These directions are sacred. They were what you had been looking for.

“There’s no guards up there so just worry about getting the amulet and getting out. I’ll be here in case anyone decides to come by.”

Without further ado you dart up the stairs, the carpet on each step preventing you from making a noise. You glance down at Johnny who is posted at the bottom of the staircase. He smiles warmly over his shoulder and gives you a subtle thumbs up just as a pair of guards pass him by.

You move fast and without hesitation, your friend's words still clear in your mind. When you finally arrive in front of the door that holds the amulet you take a shaky deep breath. Your trembling hand twists the doorknob completely before pushing it open enough for you to take a peek inside.

A boy, around your age, sits cross legged on a king sized bed with satin sheets, acoustic guitar in hand. His fingers fiddle with the strings and he pushes a pair of specks farther up the bridge of his nose as he examines sheet music sprawled all over his mattress, attentively. You hear him hum to himself, tongue poking out of his lips as he concentrates on the melody. He sighs in frustration before leaning back on his headboard. He briskly runs a hand through his black locks before his fingers land on something on his neck. Your eyes widen as you catch a glint of green.

He was still wearing the amulet.

You refrain from groaning. You thought it would be on his dresser or bedside table and that finding it would only take a little rummaging. Then again, you also thought he was going to be asleep. It seemed like this guy just wanted to make things difficult for you.

You find yourself to be at a loss. You ask yourself what Taeyong would do before concluding that pondering it was useless. Obviously, Jaehyun would be right by his side as backup. You had no one but Johnny at the bottom of the stairs and you couldn’t call for him. What about Yuta? He would probably charge in, gun cocked and loaded. You couldn’t do that either.

You decide that all you can do is your best.

So, you knock. The humming ceases and you hear the bed creak. You press yourself against the wall, holding your breath as his footsteps near and the door flies further open.

“Donghyuck, I know you’re a servant but I already told you that you don’t have to knoc—”

The prince isn’t given a chance to finish before your hand is clamped firmly against his mouth. Your other hand grips his shoulder with such force that he wails in pain. You feel him struggle to escape your grip and his cries come out muffled. You push him against the door, eyes boring into his caramel brown orbs.

“Would you be willing to give me the amulet, my prince? Or will I have to rip it off you?”

Your every word is laced with venom and if anything, he should feel more threatened but you can’t help but notice that his screams have stopped. He mumbles something that you can’t understand so you part your fingers so he can get a couple words in.

“You’re a girl?”

You shut your hand over his mouth again, rolling your eyes. “Yes, I’m a girl. Problem?”

He shakes his head, furiously.

“Great. Amulet, please?”

He raises a hand to grip the string that binds the precious emerald green stone to his neck. He removes it and places it in your outstretched hand. You refuse to let the sheer excitement that blooms in you show. You needed to maintain the upper hand.

“Very good. You’re a smart thing, huh? Glad to see they taught someone around here some common sense.”

You inspect the amulet and allow yourself a smile. Just a small one. You tuck it into your pocket before turning your attention back to the prince.

“What’s your name?”

“Mark. Mark Lee.”

“Alright, Mark Lee. You’ve been very cooperative with me tonight, surprisingly so. I want you to keep it up, can you do that for me?”

He nods and you drag him towards his bed, forcing him to sit down on the edge. He gazes up at you, eyes slightly watery. You feel a pang of guilt at his fearful look but then you remember the gem in your pocket and suddenly a couple tears from Mark don’t seem like such a bad price to pay for it.

“Sit here. Don’t move until I’m gone. No screaming or calling for help either, got it?”

He nods once more. You back away from him, watching to make sure he stays still in his place. He does, eyes still following your every move.

“Okay, Mark, um. Have a good night?”

With that you all but fling yourself at the door. You run back the same way you came, containing any celebratory laughter or dances. You had the amulet. You were set for life. Your friends were, too. You’re convinced that nothing can bring you down.

“Hey! Burglar girl!”

Scratch that.

You spin on your heel and there stands Mark, charging towards you. You debate whether or not to keep running. You were so, so close. The stairs were right there. But then you catch sight of an object in his hand, one that shines even in the dark of the hallway. It’s green and hangs by a string. You pat your pocket, making sure if you really even had the amulet. You feel it, it’s with you. Then what was it that Mark had?

Against your better judgment, you wait right where you stand, allowing the boy to catch up to you. He wordlessly holds the second amulet up for you to take. You grab it, Mark having seemingly no problem with that.

“That’s… a decoy,” he pants, pointing to your pocket, doubled over as he inhales air.

You feel yourself become even more confused than before and this time you have no control over your facial expressions. Your eyebrows furrow and you hold the real amulet close to your face, staring at it carefully with uncertainty. All you can ask is, “why are you doing this?”

By this point Mark’s caught his breath and he stands up straight. “I wanted you to have the real one. I mean, you went through all this effort, right?”

“I don’t buy that. What are you gonna do? Turn me in? Is this a trap?”

Before you can speculate any further, Mark entraps your wrist with his hand. You kick yourself for even stopping in the first place. If you had made a run for it, at least you could go back to Johnny and Taeyong and the rest of your friends even if the amulet you held was fake. Now you were going to get consequences, for sure. You prepare for him to call out for someone but he never does.

“I want to go with you.”  

You’re sure your ears are deceiving you so you don’t even bother responding and for a moment there’s just silence. He clears his throat.

“Did you hear me?”

“Oh, so you really did say that, huh?”

“Um, yes, I did.”

You shake your head. “Sorry, I’m just in a shock, I’m sure you can understand.”

He nods and releases his grip on you. “Yeah, this must be pretty confusing but I promise I’m being serious. Royal life is not something I’m cut out for and running away with a pretty stranger seems like my best bet right now.”

You blink a couple times. “Wow. So, this is how Jaehyun felt that one time.”

Mark tilts his head. “What?”

“Nothing. Let’s just go. But only if you’re sure about this.”

“I’m positive.”

“Alright then.” You begin to go down the stairs before you pause and look back at Mark and the amulet in his hand. “That is real, right?”

He can’t help but give you a lopsided smile. “Yes, it is.”

“Just making sure.”

BONUS:

Taeyong is a loss for words as his eyes dart between you and the dark haired boy besides you. Jaehyun matches his confusion, arms crossed over his chest. Yukhei seems equally amused and worried, glancing at Mark, tentatively. Yuta smiles wickedly, interested with how things have gone and surely excited to see you attempt to explain yourself.

“Um, Johnny?” Taeyong says, hoping the oldest one onboard will have some kind of explanation.

He shrugs, a tired expression on his face. “I have no idea. The kid was set on coming, I wasn’t gonna say no. I just wanted to get out of there.”

Taeyong nods, staring at Mark, intensely. “Uh-huh. And you’re here because?” He leaves the question open-ended and Mark rubs the back of his neck, giving you a lingering look.

“Well, she kind of just appeared in my room and started bossing me around and like, I freaked but it was also the most exciting thing that’s happened to me in years so I didn’t want to lose her so I gave her the amulet—the real one, by the way—and told her I wanted to come along. Now I’m here in front of you all and I’m kind of uncomfortable, I won’t lie—”

“You got the amulet?”

You’re grateful for Taeyong’s interruption; you’re sure that without it, Mark would rant the entire night.

You shake your head. “He has it, actually.”

Mark steps forward and places it around Taeyong’s neck without a second thought. On the way back, you had briefly explained to him how long he had been looking for it and how much it meant to him. Mark found his dedication incredible and seemed even excited to give Taeyong his long-awaited prize.

Taeyong’s hands delicately trace the outline of the accessory and you swear he tears up.

“I’m glad it’s yours now,” Mark comments. “Even if you do sell it. It just sat around back at the palace, another ridiculously expensive thing nobody really cared about.”

Taeyong nods with a sniffle, overcome with emotion. Jaehyun reaches over to rub his back. Yuta begins to clap slowly but you nudge him and he knocks it off. You hear Johnny thank Yukhei for his help, to which he only shakes his head, humbly.

You lock eyes with Mark and he glances around the ship, looking suddenly nervous. You smile at his antics, motioning for him to come closer. He slowly obeys and you extend your hand towards him. He stares down at it, hesitantly.

“I don’t bite,” you promise. “I just want to start over. I don’t think I made the best first impression.”

He grips your hand back with a chuckle. “I beg to differ. I know you were trying to rob me and everything but you still seemed nice enough. That’s stupid to say about the person who had me pressed against a wall like, half an hour ago but to be honest, I was fine with it. It was kinda hot—”

A chorus of too loud to be real coughs fill the ship and the culprits are none other than your crewmates. They all eye Mark, as if to give him a warning. Even Yukhei gives him a nasty look.  

“Um, so, anyway, thanks. For getting me out of there. Might not seem like it but it really sucked.”

You understand him completely, having been in a similar situation yourself. “No problem. Glad to have you around.”

The sudden sound of sirens prevent you from saying anything else. They’re incredibly loud and you press your hands over your ears to try and shield yourself from the horrendous noise. To add to the commotion, a couple cop ships speed by in the near distance.

“The sirens are from the palace!” Mark exclaims. “They’re probably looking for me!”

“So are the cops!” you respond.

You laugh at the way his face drops with worry. Being on the cops’ bad side was still foreign to him. You place a reassuring hand on his back.

“Don’t worry! You’ll get used to it!”

[bookiemonsterph]

Serpent & Dove

Synopsis:

Bound as one, to love, honor, or burn. Book one of a stunning fantasy duology, this tale of witchcraft and forbidden love is perfect for fans of Kendare Blake and Sara Holland.

Two years ago, Louise le Blanc fled her coven and took shelter in the city of Cesarine, forsaking all magic and living off whatever she could steal. There, witches like Lou are hunted. They are feared. And they are burned.

As a huntsman of the Church, Reid Diggory has lived his life by one principle: Thou shalt not suffer a witch to live. But when Lou pulls a wicked stunt, the two are forced into an impossible situation—marriage.

Lou, unable to ignore her growing feelings, yet powerless to change what she is, must make a choice. And love makes fools of us all.

Set in a world of powerful women, dark magic, and off-the-charts romance, book one of this stunning fantasy duology will leave readers burning for more.

Title: Serpent & Dove Series: Serpent & Dove Author: Shelby Mahurin ISBN: 0062878034 (ISBN13: 9780062878038) Pages:  560  pages (Paperback) Published: August 4th 2020 by HarperTeen (first published September 3rd 2019) Characters: Reid Florin Diggory, Louise Margaux Larue Genre: Fantasy, Young Adult, Romance, Magic, Paranormal

I feel like I can’t even begin to describe just how pleasantly surprised I was by this novel. I am not a big fan of romance-heavy stories and one of my least favorite tropes of all time is hate-to-love relationships—so basically the two things the entire plot hinges on. Needless to say, I went into this very hesitantly. Very intrigued to learn how Lou and Reid end up in the position they do and to experience this story everyone has been raving about, but also keeping my expectations as low as I could. I did not for a second expect to come out of it knowing it will, without a doubt, be on my list of favorite books of the year. This is one of those books that I believe truly lives up to all the hype surrounding it.

Serpent & Dove is a dual perspective narrative following Lou le Blanc, a witch, and Reid Diggory, a Chasseur, or witch-hunter. Lou has escaped from her coven and has taken refuge in the city of Cesarine. She lives in hiding. giving up magic and surviving as a thief.  In Cesarine, witches are seen as a danger to all of society—they are hunted and burned, and no woman is above suspicion.

Reid is sworn to the church and charged with the hunting and capture of witches, sworn into a role that demands he will not let a single witch live. In a surprising turn of events, Lou’s and Reid’s paths cross in a way neither of them could have ever expected. A way that leads to their marriage, that forms a seemingly impossible love, and that brings Lou under the roof of the people who could be her source of protection—or her death.

The writing in this book is absolutely superb and cements Shelby Mahurin on my list of favorite authors. Her writing is gorgeous and so easy to fall into. It is incredibly clear how meticulously she formed every aspect of this novel. Both the plot and the setting are incredibly intriguing and captivating. I loved the French influences in all aspects of the story—it makes for a very vivid and enticing atmosphere and Cesarine is the perfect backdrop for everything that takes place. She also does a wonderful job with the dual perspective narrative and creates two very individual voices for our two main characters.

Even though the romance is the main focus of the story, the fantasy aspect is very strong as well and is of almost equal importance. The fantastical elements, though more of a side plot for now, don’t really take a backseat in terms of detail or how significant they are to the overall story. Mahurin crafts an interesting and intricate magic system as strongly as she crafts the romance. It’s something I’m particularly looking forward to seeing in more detail in the next book.

The only minor issue I had plot-wise was the event that sends Lou and Reid down the path toward their marriage. Though my opinion shifted by the end of the novel, as I was able to see every event throughout in a different light, the scene still felt a little bit clumsy and heavy-handed and also completely random, maybe a little too much so. It wasn’t at all what I would have expected and was a bit of a letdown for me, so I sort of wish it had been done differently. But overall, this barely affected my enjoyment of the story as a whole.

This novel holds one of the most brilliant and beautiful casts of characters I’ve ever come across. Lou is everything. She is one of my new favorite characters of all time—I fell completely and utterly in love with her right from the very start of the novel. She is so strong despite the pain she has been through and the terror and uncertainty of her life now. Lou is sassy and sarcastic and absolutely hilarious. She’s tough and guarded much of the time, but underneath, she is so intensely loving, caring, and loyal—just an absolutely beautiful person. I connected with her so easily, and it was an absolute joy reading from her perspective and following her journey.

It took me a while to warm up to Reid, but I definitely had by the end of the novel. He’s quite set in his ways and his prejudices against women, always acting in a very traditional way toward Lou. They are living in a time when women are little more than the property of their husbands and this is something that is clearly ingrained in Reid. He is protective of her and chivalrous to a fault, but it takes a while from him to sound anywhere near loving, even after it’s clear he has feelings for her. At first, I struggled a bit reading his chapters because his attitude and initial inability to be open-minded frustrated me so much. However, there is one major reason I noticed that I think prevented me from connecting with him sooner.

Yes, he is very close-minded in many of his beliefs and his actions, but I felt that there were a few times where things sort of got lost in translation in a sense. There would be scenes from his point of view where his actions and words felt a bit confusing to me and I took them as negative. But later on, something would cause me to realize what exactly he meant by what he said or did and that it wasn’t in fact negative. I don’t think I explained that particularly well, but basically, I think there were times where his point of view could have been written more clearly. In the end, though, I did end up really liking him and it does become very obvious how much he truly cares and would do anything for Lou.

I ended up absolutely adoring the relationship between Lou and Reid. It unfolds and transforms in such a natural way. As I said before, hate-to-love is one of my least favorite tropes, but it is done so well here that I didn’t really mind it. It’s still not something I enjoy reading about and that obviously does impact my rating of the novel slightly. However, few people can get me to like a novel that features this type of relationship, and Mahurin definitely nailed it. My problem with the trope tends to stem from the tension being completely nonsensical and feeling like it’s just thrown in to create drama, and you will not find that in this book.

The tensions between Lou and Reid feel so realistic and necessary—they have every reason to be wary of each other. Understandably, that they sometimes overlook what they truly know about the other as a person in favor of ideas and prejudices that were hammered into them from a young age. They are both strong characters that are unapologetically themselves and, while it causes them to butt heads at first, it turns into a mutual respect for each other and, of course, love as well. The issues that create conflict, in the beginning, are what come to be the things that pull them together rather than drive them apart. And the sum of both of them individually—the strengths and the flaws—is what brings them each to love the other wholly.

There are also some stellar side characters in this story. Coco was, by far, my favorite—she is totally someone I’d love to be friends with. The friendship between her and Lou is so lovely and I’d gladly spend hours just reading about them. They have such a fun dynamic and they always have each other’s backs no matter what. They are the definition of found family and their story warmed my heart. Ansel, a bit like Reid, took me a while to start really liking, but he turns out to be an absolutely wonderful person and a great addition to that lovable found family.

Now for one of the most surprising things I’ve probably ever said and also one of the biggest contradictions when it comes to my typical taste in stories. As I’ve already said, I’m generally not a fan of books that heavily focus on romance. However, this book was so well written that one of my absolute favorite scenes in the entire story was the scene where Lou and Reid make love for the first time, as well as the truly heartwarming lead-up to it.

I am beyond picky about how sex scenes are written in novels. So many fall into the trap of using overly descriptive and flowery prose and a lot of just plain weird words for everything. While I think that being extremely blunt and cold about it is not a good direction to go in either, the flowery descriptions and oversharing of details tend to make these scenes feel very awkward and unrealistic.

The sex scene in this book does not fall into either of these traps and I absolutely adored it. It just feels so realistic and natural, and that is exactly what I frequently find is missing from these types of scenes. Mahurin continues to write as beautifully as ever but is, I felt, fairly minimal on the exact details of the scene. And this is exactly why it works so well.

While yes, there is still detail, she relies more often on the reader’s knowledge of what takes place during a sexual encounter, which cuts out the need for the overly flowery prose and questionable word choices. In a number of places, she writes it in a “fade to black” way without actually fading to black. Mahurin has created a perfect example of how a sex scene should be written and how it should feel to the reader. The focus is on the passion and love between Lou and Reid—on not just physical feeling, but emotional and mental as well. It is so beautiful and natural and is, by far, one of the best-executed scenes I’ve ever come across.

Suffice it to say, I really enjoyed this book. It is so beautifully written and captivating—it is very easy to fall into and get lost in. Shelby Mahurin has created a magical and emotional tale, both heartbreaking and heartwarming that, at its core, brilliantly demonstrates the power of love of all kinds. The story and especially the characters will definitely stick with me for a long time. I’ve honestly been thinking about it constantly since I finished it a few months ago. And, of course, I am absolutely dying to get my hands on the next book in this series. I love how this ended and I cannot wait to be back with these characters once again and see their story continue.

[robert-c]

The Abortion “Debate”

The Abortion “Debate”

What has always amazed me about this was the completely untenable position of those opposed to the right to choose; as well as their moral hypocrisy.

Let’s skip over the theological debate over when life begins etc. unless we are going to live in a society where there is an official state religion, that should have no bearing on the issue. Only independent living beings can be supported, protected etc. by a government. Something living only while it is inside of a person, should give that person the primary say about what happens.

But let’s skip past that for a moment too.

Those who support these restrictions on abortion (all of which are intended to be a piece by piece removal of the right to a safe and legal abortion) believe some pretty strange things. For example, I read that a lot of women opposed to abortions believe that today it is being used as a means of birth control. There is not one shred of evidence to suggest that this is widespread let alone a majority of the reasons for abortions – BUT even if it were true…what would preventing such a woman from having an abortion do? Can anyone really be so naïve as to think that a woman who would casually have an abortion as a means of birth control would suddenly become a responsible mother? Or even use birth control? Can you even imagine her being responsible during the pregnancy? More to the point, would any of these people so sure that banning abortions for women like that actually adopt a baby from such a woman? People believe some pretty unrealistic things when it is easy for them to do so, especially when it allows them to have a simple answer to complex issues.

But let’s return to the often cited argument about when “personhood” should be defined to start. It sounds like a legitimate question but it is nothing more than a ploy to enforce a particular religious view point under the guise of a legitimate question. So let’s examine what happens when we try to go down that path. Pick any point you want before birth to claim that the fetus has become a person entitled to equal protection under the law, same as any other citizen. That would mean that every miscarriage, every still birth would have to be investigated as a possible homicide. Since the people who propose these sorts of restrictions don’t actually care about people as much as their simplistic “principles” we can skip over the anguish and emotional turmoil the women involved would be feeling. How does an investigation like that go? Do we examine every detail of the woman’s life? Did she not exercise enough? Or too much? Was she eating properly? (and what does that mean, exactly and who decides?) Did she perhaps have a drink of wine before she knew she was pregnant? And since we can’t always pinpoint the reason for the miscarriage how will we pin this on any one cause? The proposals at the heart of this “movement” are incapable of being enforced with any objectivity, fairness or accuracy. And any attempt to do so is just intrusive, in a way more personal than any of the other aspects right wingers love to complain about.

And what about those situations where health conditions force a choice between the life of the mother or the baby? Who gets the priority? If the “fetus” is accorded all the rights of a fully independent human, how does the law work in a case like that?

Let’s look at a big picture here. The one thing the world isn’t short of is people. We are not on the verge of extinction through lack of procreation. We have plenty of societal problems from people who were raised in dysfunctional families, why would we want to encourage more unfit parents to have children that they don’t want and can’t afford (financially or emotionally) to raise? I think this goes back to the idea of not wanting to be wrong and to have simple answers for all of life’s complicated issues.

I suppose we should give some examination of the religious issue, even though a truly free society cannot have an official religion. Most, if not all, of the anti-choice forces I’ve read about or met, seem to focus on a Christian version of religion for an excuse to ban it. But consider this, abortion has been around for thousands of years. It was certainly known and practiced in the time of Jesus. And yet he doesn’t mention it at all in his teachings about moral behavior.

While Catholics don’t believe in artificial birth control or abortion, it is less them and more the evangelical protestants that want to ban others choices in these matters. I suspect that the strenuous objection to others choice of an abortion is the product of various preachers, and their flock. The same flock who thump a Bible they’ve never fully read or understood, and take their beliefs from a preacher instead of from the book they claim it comes from. In other matters they will point to a passage in Leviticus claiming to condemn homosexuality (which technically only condemns voluntarily taking the role of “bottom” in such an act) but omit mentioning the passages where they would be condemned for their polyester cotton mix clothing; for eating bacon, lobster, shrimp; or for their lack of animal sacrifices at the temple.

In short, the religious objection to abortion is irrelevant in a society without a State religion and inaccurate on its own terms. It is little more than a few influential people swaying a larger group of folks who don’t want to have to think for themselves. The unfounded fear that there are people, “out there somewhere”, not living in the same confining box, seems to be the real issue. It’s a lot easier to be an advocate for living in a 50+ year ago past if you don’t have to live side by side with people who aren’t restricting themselves that way.

Morality and ethics, spiritually or legally, are much more complex than simple absolutes. Admittedly, “thou shalt not kill” has a nice simplicity, a punchy “ad man sound bite” quality, but the better translation is “murder” not “kill”. And even there are we to make no distinction between a premeditated murder, and that conducted in a fit of passion or rage? And what of those who leave someone in a situation which reasonably could be expected to lead to their death? Try as we might to reduce the world and all of its potential behavior into a few simplistic rules, true justice and compassion demand that we look at more.

As a man, it is impossible for me to fully imagine what it would be like to be a woman facing the choice of an abortion. The best I can do is come up with the “rational” side of the argument pro and con, if it were my choice to make for me. But that ignores the emotional and even chemical changes that such an event would have on me. It humbles me to attempt to put myself in that place. At the same time, I can fully appreciate the fact that it is a decision I would have to live with and I wouldn’t want someone else dictating it to me based on such flawed logic and morality as the “pro-lifers”. I know women who support abortion rights and choice, who personally could never choose to have an abortion. And I know Pro Choice women who have had an abortion, who believe it was the right decision at the time, and are still bothered by the fact that they had to make that choice. This is the essence of understanding freedom and personal liberty. It is, in fact, the core issue of what real freedom of belief is all about; making our own choices and living with the outcomes – THAT is real responsibility.

Anti-choice forces have tried to make this about responsibility, about “when life begins” and a host of other quasi-moral and quasi-scientific issues. But the real issue is and has always been about who controls your own life and your own body. It has always been a huge contradiction that the same people who fear government “over reach” and intrusion into the personal lives of people support such personal and intrusive action when it comes to personal ethical beliefs. The only truly uniting principle of their agenda is to dictate their set of personal beliefs on everyone. They often try to portray this as what is happening to them. But look at the facts. No one is forcing them to have an abortion if they don’t want one. They are only being prevented from dictating the choices of others.

Then there is the return of the “Domino Theory”. As a quick refresher; staunch anti-communists of the Cold War era believed we needed to be militarily involved in stopping the spread of Communism, notably in Viet Nam, because if we didn’t stop it in that country, then there would be another and another until it was this country. As unrealistic and idiotic as this idea was its reincarnation in the abortion debate is even … well, crazier. According to this logic, the ability to choose an abortion is the first domino in a chain that leads to “mercy killings” of people with birth defects, mental disabilities and … well, fill in the blank for whatever will get you riled up. That would certainly be awful, but I’m truly at a loss to see how the connection works, they are two very different situations. And just for the record, throughout all of history, those who seek to impose their religious views on others don’t seem to shrink back from killing those who don’t share their beliefs, and that has got to be at least as horrible and much more likely.

Do we need any more evidence that the anti-abortion, anti-choice forces are more about control than morality? Ask how much money have they donated to anti-abortion candidates compared to how much they have donated to providing health care and adoption to women with unwanted pregnancies. If, indeed, you are more interested in preventing abortions and providing for the consequences of unwanted pregnancies, where is the financial support for women to carry a baby to term and put it up for adoption? Can anyone provide data that shows that at least as much money is donated by anti-abortion supporters to this, than to candidates who simply want to make it illegal?

As a final note, you may not be aware of this salient fact. Many years ago when abortion was illegal, pregnant women needing to find doctors who would safely terminate a pregnancy were often helped by ministers and others of faith. They knew the dangers of unsafe abortions and they knew of the heartbreaking challenges of the women. Some trying to provide for another child when they couldn’t completely provide for the ones they had, some fearing violence merely for being pregnant, etc. These were men and women of faith who actually were aware of the pain in all aspects of the choices these people faced and who were there to provide comfort and help where they could.

If this is still a religious and ethical issue to you, then please try to answer honestly for yourself: if Jesus were here today, do you see him as someone providing comfort to a woman in such a situation, or one leading the crowd to throw stones? And if, in fact, this is some sort of sin that God will punish, well He will have His shot at all of us eventually, He doesn’t need a political hack interfering with our free will.

[toonstarterz]

BECAUSE I’M NOT POPULAR, I’LL READ WATAMOTE: CHAPTER #165

Summer shenanigans are a staple of the manga and anime work, though how much you can expect the clichés to actually happen depends on how much effort you’re willing to put into making it a reality. Fact is, summer is never as fantastical or memorable as we’d like to dream. You only get three(in Japan) high school summers in one lifetime. But as they say, it’s who you spend it with, not what, that will stick around with you. 

Chapter 165: Because I’m Not Popular, I’ll Enjoy My Last High School Summer Break 

Hey, if Futaki wants to be a professional gamer girl (minus the bathwater), she’s gotta stay on top of the new releases. 

Mother always knows. Always.

There’s a fine line between persuading and threatening, Katou. Just saying.

I can already see the (not totally implausible) jokes about Mako and Yoshida secretly meeting to hook up. Even though that’s 99% not what will happen, Mako’s vagueness is something to note. The way I see it, Mako doesn’t want Yuri to feel left out, so she’s downplaying the “fun” she’ll be having with Yoshida.

Or Nico Tanigawa are blatantly ship-teasing. Either or.

Nemo’s got a pretty sweet LINE avatar.

Even through her messages, Nemo is still passive-aggressive, like she expects Tomoko won’t listen to her unless she’s demanding in her tone, exclamation points and all. She still gots a way to go to meet Katou’s level of intimidation, however.

Summer school?

Oh, the beach.

The greyscale nature of the manga medium makes this beach look a lot prettier than it probably is. Those delightful memories involving washed-up stingrays sure doesn’t help. 

I’m not entirely certain just how studious Yuri is as a student, but I imagine she’s playing up the “all work, no play” angle just to free herself from Nemo.

Nemo makes a fair point. Getting too cooped up indoors where it’s comfortable can make it difficult to study, especially when you're surrounded by distractions. A change of scenery can clear your head and make it easier to retain information. 

Of course, that sort of environmental shift doesn’t work for everyone. Someone like Nemo may appreciate the summery atmosphere, but a girl like Yuri would get agitated by the heat and humidity. Having external stimuli is ideal if you’re the type who operates better when your attention is dispersed. But for those that need to be focused on a single task to complete, it can be quite difficult.

Next time on Mythbusters...

But in all seriousness, I would like to see if there have been any real-life studies on certain sounds–waves in this case–improving one’s ability to concentrate and overall performance. My amateurish theory is that a lot of that “improvement” is a result of the placebo effect, or that there are otherwise too many extraneous factors to make a clear correlation.

In that respect, I think Yuri and Nemo’s arguments are both valid.  

A recent trend I’ve been noticing with Yuri is that she looks to Tomoko for validation. She acknowledges that they’re not the same, but having Tomoko back her up probably makes her feel more confident in her opinions, if for nothing more than having an equal-to-majority rule.

Of course, when Tomoko does disagree with her, that’s when Yuri has to either stubbornly stick to her guns, or honestly reassess herself. And thanks to the beauty of character development, the latter’s been happening more at a healthy pace.

OUCH.

It pains me to see Okada call out Yuri like that.

It pains me even more that you can’t really call out Okada for it, either.

Introverts are generally self-conscious about the very traits they embody, even when it’s that’s their comfort zone. Much like how an otaku will get uncomfortable when non-otakus hype them up. Sure, Okada probably meant it as a compliment when she called Yuri talkative, but it’s based on the idea that Yuri’s quiet nature was an incorrect assumption, which can feel kind of demoralizing.

It’s not an easy thing to address, and I’m curious to see how they’ll work through it going forward. 

Quick, someone go update their Wiki pages!. 

Reality ensues. All those amazing anime-esque summer plans can be deterred by something as simple as unreliable weather.  

Although, having to make your own wave sounds kind of defeats the purpose of being there, doesn’t it, Nemo?

Now playing...”Eroge BGM” Playlist.

Set on autoplay.

I’m glad that no one’s complaining about translating this text, cause let’s get real. The amount of redraws that would take is ridiculous, especially for an unofficial translation. 

If you think that I’m going to screencap every image of Yuri smiling just so we can bask in her cuteness...

You’d be absolutely correct.

Oooh man, this is arguably worse than calling out the quiet kid as “talkative”. At least during that time, it could pass as just an innocent observation. But being able to smile is one of those things they supposedly instill in you during primary school. Bringing it up like that suggests that Yuri is a child who purposely tries to hide her smiles. Again, Okada meant no harm, obviously, but if they’re going to push for an OkadaxYuri friendship, there’s going to be a lot of hoops to go through.

Tomoko may have opened her mind up more about the negative stereotypes about “normies”, but the positive stereotypes still persist. In this case, it’s the idea that her more sociable peers would enjoy school simply because they can hang out with their friends. Little did she know, that’s often not the case...

PINEAPPLE-CHAN DEVELOPMENT, BABY!

Ahem, pardon my outburst, but I’ve got a lot to say about this. We’ve known for a long time now that Okada is part of the “semi-in-crowd”, and it was easy to assume that all her socializing–going to karaoke for example–were just things she always enjoyed.

But what if it wasn’t. From what Okada’s implying, she sometimes ends up hanging out with people that she would rather not. Perhaps its a friend-of-a-friend type of struggle, where she hangs with people she doesn’t really like out of politeness for a mutual friend. And even if Okada is harboring a few dark thoughts, there’s plenty of reasons to not like going to school, as she said. As someone who’s relatively extroverted, having to work through the more solitary parts of school like studying can be especially difficult.

In short, hidden depths are great.

I can’t really blame you, Tomoko. When you secretly put people on a pedestal like that, it’s hard to acknowledge their human sides that show how they struggle with everyday problems just like anyone else. Even the most well-adjusted of people have their share of frustrations. 

This was totally Nemo’s plan all along.

All these panel shots of Yuri off to the side while everyone else gallivants fills me with those paternal feelings of a father wanting their daughter to make friends. It goes against everything I know about Yuri’s character, but I guess you shouldn’t underestimate the power of moe.    

This is a pretty good example of the line that separates Tomoko and Yuri. They have very similar perspectives, but it’s Tomoko’s status as an introverted extrovert that allows her to go in the ocean, while Yuri’s extroverted introvert personality lets her stay on the sidelines. 

Poor Beach-kun is not having a good day.

So even the others are noticing how Tomoko is like Yuri’s social floatation device.

Another person probably would’ve taken the sentimental route, going on about “saving these precious memories” or “I want you to experience this with us”. The kind of things Yuu-chan would say.

Thing is, Tomoko would get too embarrassed saying that touching crap, so she has to go the indirect route instead. Using pseudo-logic so she doesn’t have to exaggerate her emotions (which are there, just more reserved). 

Either way, it still sounds vaguely creepy coming from her.

Thankfully, it actually works here because Yuri has trouble articulating her emotions, too. Tomoko probably knows subconsciously that touching crap doesn’t work on Yuri, so it makes a great deal of sense that Yuri would be more responsive to dumb logic. Especially if it’s from her loveably dumb friend.

I can get used to Tomoko and Yuri unknowingly showing Nemo up.

Off in the distance...

“Getting tangled up in gross seaweed so you can spread your own grossness to other girls? Gross!”

Okay, so I know Tomoko is probably just genuinely startled by what's happening here, but you can’t tell me that her face doesn’t scream, “NOW’S MY CHANCE FOR A GROPIN’!”

lewd.

Okay, let’s be honest. I’ve watched enough anime to know that shots like this are easy fodder for fanservice. Conveniently transparent wet uniforms, amirite? And to be frank, I don’t think the mangakas are totally playing the innocent game. Sure, it’s not as blatantly objectifying as a lot of other series tend to do in scenes like this, but the posing of the girls and angle of the camera just seems too opportune to be anything but deliberate. Be careful when walking that fine line, Nico Tanigawa.

On a more positive note, I’m glad Tomoko’s first instinct was just to help them up. Though heaven knows she’s gonna milk this for all it’s worth back home.

Oh, Yuri and your accountability issues.

When life gives you lemons...you know the rest.

The best part about watching the crazy shenanigans you see in anime is that you can omit all the boring and troublesome real-life consequences. So yeah, accidentally getting splashed by beach water may seem fun in the moment, but the annoyance of having to wash your clothes afterward just isn’t worth it.

Sometimes, summer just won’t give you a break. 

Yes. Yes, you did.

Ignoring Tomoko’s embarrassed (or lewd–it’s kind of interchangeable) expression, this is probably the most wholesome summer chapter is the series’ run. That’s not to say that the chapter is “unrealistic” in any way. Sure, the end shot of all four of them reeks of 4-girl slice-of-life moe, but it actually deconstructs it a little. Instead of a fun memory, the memory itself is decidedly bothersome and more trouble than it’s worth, but there’s a sense of enjoyment to be gained from that. As Tomoko once implied, doing stupid, embarrassing things isn’t so bad when you can share in the experience. There’s a reason for the saying, “A few years from now, we’re gonna laugh at this,” after all.  

It may be Tomoko’s final summer in high school, but it will most certainly be her fondest.

[constantlyunlightening]

Prove It (Part 1)

Fandom : BNHA

Pairing : Pro-hero!Bakugo/F!Reader

Genre : the beginnings of smut, 18

Rated for : unapologetic smut with little plot, a competitive Bakugo, sassy reader with a possible death wish and unhygienic work practice! Really, I'm just thirsty for Bakugo. The next chapter will be even more of that

 Maybe his quirk needed to shoot out of his eyes instead of his hands. Sure, the idea of explosions blasting out of someone's face was unrealistic. Yet, with the look this man was giving her, she was convinced that's where his powers should originate from. She could almost see the sparks flickering in that crimson gaze of his as he locked it onto her with disdain.

"The fuck did you just say to me?"

A growl, as harsh as his glower, seeped into the space between them. This guy was intense - but she knew that already. Everyone who ever heard of Katsuki Bakugo, the hero, knew that. His reputation had succeeded him as being loud, explosive and oh-so-very-intense.

That reputation of his was even more of a reason why she shouldn't be trying to pick a fight with him. But she couldn't help but to return his sharp gaze with an indignant look of her own. But if she was already past the point of no return; may as well stick with it at that, right? "I said Deku is better than you. He's a better fighter, better strategist, and has a better attitude… Just better," she reinstated, her attitude spiking up in the face of the hot head before her. It wasn't until the words were spilling out of her that she even realized what she was saying. "Hey, I bet he's an even better fuck than you are too!"

Did she say it because she needed to release some of her own anger? Or was she was spending too much time around Midnight? Or, maybe, she said it because she was out of her mind and prepared to say anything for the satisfaction of pissing him off. Hell, she could just be sexually frustrated for all she knew or cared at this point. She just needed to get a rise out of him.

Honestly, their argument didn't have a genuine point to it. Trying to search for her reasoning for getting involved wouldn't solve anything. She and Bakugo happened to be paired up for a mission from their agency. And, well, working with Katsuki long enough tended to make a person pretty irritated in the process. There was steam that needed to be blown off. So here they were. The mission was finished. Everyone was safe and sound. And at the end of the day, the two of them were left in the agency's office alone to finish some paperwork. And after such a long day of endless bickering, there was an air of tension suspended around them.

She just had to go and make it worse.

Katsuki didn't waste time with his response. In a heart beat, the male pinned her back against the wall causing a scatter of paperwork, that she had been carrying, flying up into the air in their wake. He had her pinned to the wall, his arm right above her head as he leaned over her. His body naturally portrayed dominance - the only role Katsuki ever learned to play. The scene could have been romantic were it someone else. Maybe even sexy. But that potential was ruined by the scrunched up look on his face; like a demon seeking vengeance. He looked like he had clawed himself up straight from hell with a visage like that. "Where the fuck did that come from, you perv?" He snarled, voice low in pitch but a slowed crescendo in volume as his patience wore thin.

She should have backed out - put her foot where her mouth is - but she didn't. "Just saying." Her response was blunt, without hesitation, as if it were just an obvious fact. "When I said better, I meant it in every way, so that's included too." Why stop anyway? She wasn't in any real danger. Even if Katsuki was a bit over the top, he was still a hero. He wouldn't hurt her- not much, at least. So stepping out of line with him wasn't a grave mistake, even with his tendency for death threats. Besides, who knew? Maybe it'd end up making her feel better if she had the chance to storm and shout a bit.

But it was Katsuki who was yelling first, as usual. His volume snapped up in that moment as his face steeled itself in that angered expression. "Shut up, you brat!" His tone was somehow even harsher now. Oh, maybe she had somehow struck a chord. But it was Katsuki. It wasn't by any means hard to do that, especially when bringing up his rival hero, Deku. "I can beat that damn nerd's ass any day of the week! And at anything, ya hear me?!"

This was the man she worked with. The man who, like it or not, she'd seen in many different situations. She knew he was capable of handling himself, capable of being the best. He had proven he was dependable, even if his words didn't always match. And yet, he was so easy to reduce to a rampaging mess - over a statement so outrageous and pointless, no less! This up close, she could see the conviction flickering in his eyes as he shouted in her face. His body tempature seemed to be rising, based on the sensation of warmth that ghosted over her once he got in even closer. Maybe he was just getting ready to blow her to smithereens.

It was probably time to get some distance. It was that desicion that had her more casually trying to brush him off, making an attempt to duck away from his grasp. "Yeah, sure. Whatever you say, Katsuki-"

"You don't get to walk away from me!" It was a warning; one she wasn't sure what the follow-through would be, but a warning all the same. He blocked her with his other hand, pounding against the wall to trap her in, his body now a cage. "You don't get to look down on me."

Was she imagining it or was his tone getting even more intense? She assumed he was mostly always at his peak emotion levels - albeit that emotion mainly just being rage - but somehow he seemed to be building up more and more. He was like a snowball racing down a hill in the winter getting bigger and faster; an extremely explosive snowball.

Unless she apologized right this instant and backed down, she was fairly sure he wasn't about to calm down for anything. And even an apology wasn't a for sure strategy. But she wasn't about to say sorry to the hero who had been yelling at her practically all day. Even if she was being just as unreasonable as he was. "… For someone so sure of himself, you sure are getting defensive over this, huh?"

"That's it!" He gave more of a grunt this time around, words laced with pure aggression as his hand came off the wall and he instead was using it to clank the metal of his buckle off in a sudden burst of motion. What the hell…. "Take off your clothes!"

Her shouting had been random but somehow his was worse. Katsuki really was never one to be outdone, huh? She stared a solid ten seconds, eyes widening and mouth slightly agape, watching him tug at his own clothes before she could even think about possibly responding to his odd request. But he was far too impatient for her to figure out her words and instead, he gave her a prompt this time. Pausing his stripping for a moment, belt now undone and hanging loose around his waist, he held his palm out to display just a brief bit of sparks - enough to intimidate. "Take your fucking clothes off or I'm going to blast them off of you."

"You're kidding," she flat lined, finally finding her vocabulary admist his spontanous demand. The look of disbelief remained as she stayed caught in the trap his body had formed and all she got in response was a snort followed by another crackle of the power in his hand. "Why on earth would I take off my clothes? We're in the middle of the agency! And it's you!"

"The hell is that supposed to mean?!" His tongue made a loud click as he leaned in even closer, getting right up in her face. No way to even try and ignore him now. He was demanding full attention and he damn well was going to get it. "Listen, if you're going to talk shit you better be damn well prepared for me to make you eat your words. I'll prove I'm better. I'm the better fighter, I'm the smarter one and I'll fuck your brains out until you can't even say the name Deku if that's what it takes to get you to shut the hell up."

His voice had once again dropped down to that dangerous octave, his body tensing as he hovered over her. Suddenly she was having trouble breathing properly under his imposing presence. Crap. She had worked with him for how long? She had handled her fair share of his absolute bullshit and now, somehow, she was having trouble trying to find her words against him? She just hadn't expected him to threaten to 'fuck her brains out', no matter how vulgar he usually was. How on Earth was she supposed to react to that? She opened her mouth, ready to speak, protest, something. But before she could utter more than a syllable or two, her words were lost. Not of her own volition, but of his.

Her sentence was trapped in the confines of his lips as they melded against hers - taking advantage of the open mouthed position her attempt at speech had left her in. His tongue flicked out, darting to explore her mouth and take sole control of the kiss. He was a black hole in her space, stealing away her voice, her thoughts and her very breath in his vaccum.

It wasn't until he pulled back that she realized his hand had snuck its way into the hair at the base of her neck, tugging and twisting on the strands to force her eyes even further upwords. He may have broken the kiss but he was still only a hair's breadth away. Any slight motion from him would have her trapped by his will again, especially with the anchored hold he had on her. "Shut. Up." Her urge to fight was quelled with two simple words in tandem with a kiss. It was almost staggering how a such a simple action could so easily ignite such a burning sensation within her. While her argumentive spirit had been doused, a new flame had lit inside her heart - a different sort of passion. With one little kiss, the atmosphere changed. It was instantaneous how the world melted away around them. It was just him and her in this big open space. Despite them being coworkers, despite them being in their work place and despite him getting on every single one of her nerves in the past twenty four hours, whatever moral restrictions that kept her back were suddenly gone. "I'm going to make you take it back. If you don't want me too, than back off and don't go spouting off stupid shit anymore."

He was giving her the chance to escape. No matter how aggressive he was, he clearly wasn't about to force anything on her. As long as she shut her trap and backed away now, she'd be fine. Common sense dictated that was the right answer. But she wasn't using her common sense as her main source of judgement right now. Her actual response was very different.

"… Fine. Prove it." The conviction in her answer surprised even her. It didn't match up with the frantic rush of emotions whirling inside her and yet, she couldn't have sounded anymore absolute about the desicion. And with the addition of her hand moving up to tug down the zipper at the back of her suit, she seemed pretty damn sure of herself too.

Katsuki took advantage.

Usually, he was the one to make the first move in a fight and this wasn't an exception, either. The words 'prove it' kicked that fighting spirit of his into high gear. It was the slight loosening of the fabric at her shoulders that signaled him in, his hand snaking around her and tugging on the zipper himself. She wasn't moving fast enough for his liking. He yanked, causing a moment of worry for her about the suit itself ripping with his excessive force. But before she could contemplate too long or voice her concern, his lips had crashed right back down on hers in another heated kiss. He was either really into this or he just didn't want her talking again.

He didn't give her the option to get upset about it. His movements were sweeping her thoughts up a bit too much too quickly for her to make any proper protests. But she was pretty sure she wouldn't have even if she got the chance. His kiss was a devastating blow to her composure and it sent a wave of heat crashing over her. And while she was loosing herself in his overwhelming force, he used his hands to tug her suit down and off her body in rough motions, tossing off any hero accessories that just so happened to be in his way. Pretty expensive equipment to be tossing around the office, but Bakugo clearly didn't care. His one and only priority was being the best. If her clothes and accessories were damaged in the process - well, that was simply collateral.

It didn't take her long to be stripped bare - free of any type of clothing. The cool air grazed over her bare flesh and started to kick a more logical part of her brain into action. This was too vulnerable. He may have undone his pants - the waist starting to dip down his hips - but other than that and his gauntlets having been discarded once the paperwork started - he was still dressed and in his hero costume, no less. Something in her mind screamed weakness and as Bakugo's hands began to taper off and explore her new state, her hands rushed to even the playing field, trying to bare the man before her.

And he was having absolutely none of that.

The second her hands tried to tug at his outfit, his hands bolted off her waist and instead he had her wrists up and over her head, holding her against the wall. If she thought being caged in place by his body was intimidating, this position was now a whole lot worse, causing her cheeks to flare up. "What the hell? Are you backing out?"

Indignation flashed in those crimson eyes - the usual. But there was something off from his normal heated gaze. This look he was giving her was more than just competitive, more than just fired up. It was absolutely primal. The heat had shifted. While usually he was more reminiscent of a volcano during an eruption, now he seemed to be the moments before - it was a slow heat. Dangerous. Even while the lava paced itself, it consumed anything daring enough to try and near it. She wasn't about to explode being near Bakugo. Right now, he was about to burn her all the way from the outside in. She was feeling feverish as his hands tightened around her wrists to the point where a whimper unwittingly left her lips from the strength. "You want me to prove it? Then we're doing this all on my terms. Your dumbass isn't messing this up."

She could have retorted. She had a split second to come back with a comeback, but the low growl of his voice had her own voice hitched, unable to find words. And taking her lack of speech as a sign of submission, his grasp shifted, using one large hand now to hold both of her wrists up and above her while his other hand dropped down in a flash. Her little motion to try to even the playing field not only failed, but also backfired as now he seemed to have skipped the exploration of her body. Instead, he was apparently taking a more direct approach. "Open up," he growled as instead of that one hand now holding her, two digits were right at her lips and after a beat, she obliged. His fingers slipped right into her mouth, taking advantage of the obedience.

His fingers pumped in and out, slicking themselves in her saliva. His palm pushed back on her chin, forcing her head in place against the wall so she had no control over the tempo or the depth of how his fingers moved. She was compliant in the action, a bit too dazed over the way he was melting her to be much of a driving force. But if Bakugo knew how to do one thing, it was trash talk and that usually had a certain way to get people going. "Come on. Suck like you mean it. This is weak." His fingers accented his words with a particularly harsh pump, driving down deeper towards her throat to cause a muffled little squeak out of her as that smirk formed back on his lips. "Maybe you're the one who doesn't know how to fuck, huh? Need some motivation to get going?" He didnt need an answer, instead, his knee pressed against the wall and pushed right up against the juncture of her legs, forcing her to slide right down against the fabric over his leg as he used to force to prop her onto her toes. Her body had a nice stretch in this position, hands way above her head to keep her still even as she struggled for balance on her tip toes. But it was hard to focus on the stretch with the way he was rubbing his leg against her bare skin. It wasn't the touch she was finding herself craving but it worked to knock her back into listening as she suctioned her lips on his fingers just as he picked up the speed in which his fingers fucked her pretty little mouth.

His fingers only came out with a little pop when he was satisfied with how wet they were and then they found a new place to toy with. He replaced his leg with his hand, letting his now damp fingers target her folds, rubbing the slit of her body to rile her up. And damn, was it working. Not releasing her wrists from his grasp, his other hand found her clit in a matter of seconds and that first glide over it caused her body to jolt a bit in his grasp. Her muscles strained against his hold but it wasn't by any means enough to break it. She was strong, she had the power and wits to fight him off at least a little if she really wanted to but she was too worked up and she wanted to see the kind of explosions this man was about to give her. And honestly, right now, Bakugo clearly had the upper hand anyway.

"Better prepare yourself, ya little shit. I'm going to make sure you fall to your hands and knees begging for forgiveness when I'm done with you."

18 years of age or older! If you're under, do not read or interact.

[qveenpoppy]

kingsman the golden circle: a review

so, i kinda just jotted stuff down as my reactions during the movie, so i’m just gonna copy that over here and have that be my review. figured that’d be more authentic and i also just kinda did it for fun. i mean, it made my viewing a lot longer than it should have been but hey, i had the time, so why not? enjoy, my friends. i’ll add some overall thoughts and a score at the tail end. (i’ll bold it, for anyone who wants to jump right to that.)

Gosh that opening action sequence was BONKERS, so high-energy and kinda unrealistic that Eggsy would survive that but incredible to watch nonetheless. And it's been so long since I watched the first film in full, I've forgotten about my love for the theme/score. It's so gorgeous and epic.

I made a mistake starting this before dinner, and that first scene at Poppy's dinner was one of the most disturbing things I ever saw. I find these characters so interesting but the violence in these films is a little too much for me. I tried closing my eyes during the scene but I did so too early and then opened them back up during That part. I gotta make sure to keep them closed if something like that happens again (which I'm guessing it might).

The transitions in this movie are phenomenal, I love continuity with shapes that tie each scene to the following ones.

Because I'm watching this two years late, I saw some spoilers for the movie online. Like,  a while ago. Like, back when it first came out. I was curious and only moderately liked the first movie (it was visually great but as I said, not one for R-rated violence). That being said, the scene in which Harry gets his memories back is WAY better viewed in context. Whether you think of Harry and Eggsy as an item or not, it's very good. Eggsy knew EXACTLY what would bring Harry's memories back, and I adored their hug after Harry calmed down. (The height difference!!! Eggsy went on his toes!!!) Also, I hope Harry got to keep the puppy after that and named him Mr. Pickles Jr.

Anyone else get super hyped when they hear Colin Firth say, "Manners maketh man"? It's like you just Know shit is about to go down when those words are said in these films. I hope the prequel next year gives us an origin of that line being a battle call. Also, I heard Pedro Pascal did some rope training for this film but holy wowness, it's so good! Yeah, it's enhanced with CG effects and probably some switch-ins with stunt doubles, but it still makes for an incredible action sequence! I hope Pedro gets to show off some of these skills somehow next year in Wonder Woman 1984 or Mandalorian s2. (Can't believe I slept on him for so long as an action star, what a talent!)

You know, I can kind of see where this president is coming from? I mean, as his female aid reminds him, it's a gray area, considering those who experiment with drugs or self-medicate or teens/kids, but I can also see how taking out those who use illegal drugs kinda ends the whole "war on drugs". There's logic to it but considering those mentioned parties, it's got a devious, ignorant edge to it. I can at least say I like this movie having a little bit more of a political edge to it than the first one. I wonder if anyone had a debate like this while/after watching the movie, whether they agree with this president's stance or not. I would guess the red tie he wears points to him being a Republican, so you know most Democrats would be quick to disagree, given the climate of the country following the 2016 election (aka, more divided than ever).

Also why is Charlie hotter in this movie than he was in the first one? Is it because he's evil? The shaved head? The robot arm? (I mean, being a legit villain isn't a good thing, but he's not as psychotic as Poppy and kinda has a foot in both sides, at least since he's English and now his girlfriend is infected with Poppy's disease. I wonder if he'll change sides at some point, or just die at the hands of the Kingsman, considering what he knows about them.)

(Oh wait, nevermind, he gave her the antidote. But maybe he went behind Poppy's back to do so? Or it's a placebo version and he'll wind up turning on Poppy??? Also does he know his girlfriend got fingered by Eggsy?)

(Yeah, think I can kiss that redemption arc goodbye. Eh, at least there will be fanfics for that. Or at least ones where he and Eggsy have hot hate sex.)

Oh shit, Whiskey made Eggsy drop the antidote. But at least Eggsy and Harry are okay. But how the fuck are they gonna save the day now?

Was Harry seeing butterflies as part of the delusion stage of Poppy's virus? Did the Statesmen unknowingly treat him with one of the drugs she infected? Is he gonna die AGAIN?! (Oh wait, I saw the spoilers, he'll be fine. But they might have to use the antidote on him.)

Okay I also knew from spoilers that Whiskey wasn't gonna survive the movie but delusional Harry took him out?! Why?! Will he be revived by the Statesmen like Harry was? (Whiskey's just too cool a character to lose in one movie.)

Nevermind about the agreement thing, this president is one sick motherfucker.

Sorry this commentary is becoming much briefer and summary-esque, but Whiskey (aka Jack; they did that on purpose, didn't they?) is back. But I still don't think he'll make it till the end of the film. Is he gonna try and take Harry out? Is he actually a double agent? 

You know, with them bringing Harry back, it kinda lowers the stakes of these movies. Like, is anyone ever fully dead? 'Cause this movie especially seems to keep bringing people back, at least with that Statesman tech. So it's hard to be all that sad about Merlin's death. I mean, obviously him fucking BLOWING UP seems like a pretty permanent way to die, but I thought I saw - again, around the time this came out - behind the scenes photos of Mark with some sort of green motion capture pants, as if they'd given him some metal robot legs like I guess Gazelle's in the first film. Like he just got knocked back by the blast and could no longer use his legs, if revived. But apparently it didn't make the final cut. Still, wouldn't be surprised if they used that footage for the third film as a way to bring him back. 'Cause clearly Merlin, Eggsy, and Harry are the main trio in this franchise. (Sorry, Roxy fans.)

Ohhh, look at Elton getting in on the action sequences. Yes, Sir!!!

I love when action sequences are set to more creative choices of music :)

Harry & Elton, huh? I ship it

Oh, Whiskey is actually a bad guy. Damn. Take back all the praise I had for him. Pedro, I love you, but fuck Whiskey.

Thank god I covered my eyes this time when That happened. Ugh, gross.

Ohhh, an impeachment and removal from office. If only life could imitate art... (But only in that way, nothing else from this movie should happen in real life.)

Tequila works for Kingsman now?!

overall thoughts: a suitable sequel for this franchise. obviously pretty similar tone-wise with the humor and language and violence. i always forget that these films aren’t exactly my taste. kinda triggered my anxiety with all that violence and the whole drug-triggered virus (not that i’ll be experimenting with any illegal drugs anytime soon, but my paranoid brain will definitely keep me even further away from them now.) like, they’re well-shot and i like the characters, and i mostly wanted to watch this for some explanation of how harry was brought back from the dead, but i’m at least glad i chose to watch this at home and on my laptop/tablet. it would not have been good for me to see this on the big screen. (and i managed to watch both movies for free, and completely legally. first on xfinity on demand, this on a free rental from fandago. go me!)

as i said, the political aspects did at least make for some cool thought-provoking moments and debate. i do love when movies make you think like that. mindless action movies are the absolute worst (i’m looking at you, marvel and transformers franchises). 

i’m at least curious about that third film, how they’ll handle the loss of so many significant characters, or if they’ll magically be brought back to life, again. yeah, as cool as it was, bringing harry back may have been a mistake for this franchise. but i understand that it’s the main relationship of the series, even if eggsy is now married to that swedish princess, tilda or whatever. (meh.)

rating: 7/10. it’s hard for me to give a film any lower than that, unless i turned it off or got particularly tired/bored while watching it, so. good action, good characters, fun humor, smidge too violent. 

till next time, my dudes!

[bethhxrmon]

All I Ask of You Pt. 19

“Try to forgive, teach me to live, give me the strength to try” -”Wishing You Were Somehow Here Again” from The Phantom of the Opera

Pairing: Peter Parker  x Female OC

Word Count: 2736

Summary: Some relationships get kind of torn apart.

Warnings: Still angst, mentions of grief and depression

A/N: So I’m in the middle of the toughest part of the fic to write, and it would be great to know that my effort is reflected by everyone’s feedback! I want to know I’m doing well! 

Masterlist

Playlist

It had been impossible for Annie to get any kind of sleep that night. While she hadn’t gone back up to the roof, she wasn’t sure everything that happened afterwards was much better. The memories of the day wouldn’t stop replaying in her mind.

School was no different, and it didn’t matter how much coffee Annie tried to drink. She hadn’t looked at herself in the mirror, but she did remember throwing up in the middle of the night. Though, she could imagine that there were bags under her eyes from not sleeping. Why she had decided to go to school was beyond her. At the time, it made sense, but once she was surrounded by so many people, she couldn’t remember why she hadn’t just said she was sick.

Of course, Peter and Ned were the first people to see her, and Peter seemed to look at her as if there were something wrong with her. Maybe she was simply reading into it too much, but something didn’t feel right. Peter wasn’t supposed to know about what happened the last few days. He was supposed to still see her as completely normal.

“H-hey, are you alright?” Peter finally asked a few minutes before their first class.

Annie quickly nodded, “Yeah, I’m fine… just a bit tired, that’s all, really.”

“Are you sure? I know… I mean… I heard about Tina. Seriously, if you need anything, just tell me,” he told her, his eyes wide.

At first, Annie thought it was just Peter being his usual, nervous self. She hadn’t even thought about the party at all. That felt like it had happened months ago. The musical felt like it had been even longer ago. Yet, it had only been a couple of days, and some part of her was aware of that.

Still, she couldn’t shake the feeling of Peter looking like he had seen a ghost. Though, it was likely Annie focusing in too much on everything around her. She had no idea what to think of everything around her, but she knew that she wanted to go home. At least, she wanted to curl up in her bed and try to sleep the rest of the day away.

Things didn’t start to make any sense until lunch. She hadn’t gotten anything from the line. The plan was to sleep for the whole lunch period. It occurred to her that she hadn’t eaten breakfast either. Her stomach didn’t hurt, so she assumed it didn’t matter.

Ned and Peter already sat at the table, and Annie tried to offer them a small smile. They didn’t try to say much to her. If they had, she likely would have ignored it because she put her headphones on, trying to find some music.

Before she could pick a song, she could hear Peter and Ned talking right through her headphones. At first she was going to snap at them to shut up, but then she heard what they were talking about. She rested her head on the table, pretending to sleep.

“It’s Mr. Stark, do I take it?” Peter asked.

“Uh, yeah, dude. It’s probably about Saturday night.”

What would Peter know about Saturday night that would have to deal with Tony Stark? She wanted to rip off her headphones and demand what was going on.

Peter cleared his throat a bit, “You sure? I mean, Annie’s right there.”

“Yeah, sleeping. She’s listening to music and sleeping. She’d be more likely to tell you to shut up than listen to what you’re saying,” Ned pointed out.

Ned was wrong. That much was obvious to Annie who was trying to not fall asleep. Whatever Peter was talking about was private and if it was about Saturday night then it probably involved her. But why would Peter be worrying about something she did? Well, he likely didn’t know it was her.

“Hey, Mr. Stark. Yeah, um… yep. I saw the news. No, I don’t know where she is,” Peter sighed, “I didn’t see her after the fire started. I looked around for her yesterday, she isn’t anywhere.”

Annie felt her blood go cold. As much as she had tried to push it out of her mind before, it was obvious that Peter was talking about her. Well, not about her, but White Swan. And she was White Swan. He was looking for her.

“Hospital? No, no, sir, she would never hurt anyone. I-I don’t know what happened there, but I haven’t seen her since the fire… no, I’m not covering up for her, Mr. Stark. I’ve been trying to find her, but she isn’t anywhere.”

Her heart pounded against her chest. There wasn’t a way to make what was happening more obvious and she knew that. Peter was trying to find her, and he knew White Swan. Only, there was only one person who knew her that well to claim she wouldn’t try to hurt anyone. Spider-Man.

“Please, Mr. Stark, I’ll keep looking for her. A-and when I find her you can talk to her. But when I find her… if I do, she might be more likely to show up without being accused of murder. I don’t know if you can fix that or not, but it might help. Seriously, she… she just doesn’t know what she’s doing. Okay… bye, Mr. Stark.”

“So… still no luck with her?” Ned asked.

“No… I haven’t seen her at all. And I don’t know where she is or… well, I don’t know if she’s even… you know,”

“Alive?” Ned suggested.

“Yeah… the fire started so quickly and I don’t know what happened, but I couldn’t find her or Tina. Well, then I found Tina and… w-well I-I had to tell Mr. Stark,” Peter explained, sniffling.

“Hey, I’m sure she’s fine… she’s probably just scared. You’ll find her, you’re Spider-Man.”

There was all the confirmation she had been looking for. If things had been normal, Annie would have known exactly how she felt about Peter being Spider-Man. Right then, she felt torn. If Peter knew she had listened in, would he hate her for it?  Her thoughts were cut off by their continued conversation.

“I didn’t tell you about yesterday, did I?”

“No, you didn’t,” Ned said.

Peter sighed, “Well, I’m looking for White Swan, and I get a call from Annie… and sh-she’s crying to the point she can’t even talk. A-and I told her to tell me where she was and then she basically hung up on me. So I uh… I went to her apartment building and I was still in the suit, but I figured it would be okay. Well, not okay, but I wasn’t sure if it was over Tina or the party or…”

“Wait, what about the party? Did something happen?”

“I’ll tell you later, Ned, I hope it wasn’t about the party…. Anyways, I get there and I see Annie on the roof and I get up there and she was… she was about to throw herself off,” Peter’s voice grew thick from tears.

“Wait, Annie tried to kill herself?! And you didn’t, like, take her to the hospital or anything? What the hell?”

Peter sighed, “I-I didn’t know what to do. I mean, I stopped her, but fuck… that was terrifying. If I hadn’t gone there, she wouldn’t be alive. A-and I tried to hold her and tell her it was going to be okay, but she just pulled back from me like she thought I was gonna hurt her.”

“Dude, she was probably freaked.”

“Yeah, I know, but that was fucking terrifying… and she doesn’t look like she’s doing much better today. Just… just try to keep an eye on her, I know I can’t take care of her all the time.”

The bell rang, piercing right through everything and Annie couldn’t hide that she flinched from it. She pulled her headphones out, hoping Peter and Ned didn’t think she heard anything. Obviously they were counting on her not listening in on everything. From how in depth Peter got on everything, Annie felt like she was hearing someone narrate her life from the past couple days.

Classes passed Annie by and so did all the study prep for her finals. At least her theatre final was done. Everything had still been okay during the closing night performance, and her teacher made sure everyone was aware the performances were great.

In a way, it was a relief to hear Ms. Salazar complimenting her instead of constantly criticizing every single thing she did. Why the teacher seemed to have done that so often was beyond her, and she tried to not let any of it bother her. Granted, she did a terrible job when it came to pretending to not care about what the teacher wanted. Despite everything, theatre was still something that she wanted to keep in her life.

If only she could just get passed everything that had just happened.

She wasn’t going to tell Peter that she knew he was Spider-Man. She wasn’t going to tell Peter she was White Swan. She wasn’t going to tell Peter anything. If he just couldn’t find her, that would put an end to all of her problems and she knew it. Maybe letting Peter think she was dead was for the best.

Things would have to fix themselves eventually. Queens functioned before Annie had moved in months ago, and they would continue to function as she stopped using her powers.

The problem with her powers was that she didn’t trust them anymore. What if something happened again? Peter was right, she didn’t want to hurt anyone. More importantly, she was going to do everything in her power to make sure something like that didn’t happen again. She didn’t want anyone to touch her or hold her or even be close to her. Of course, it was slightly unrealistic, but as long as someone just didn’t attack her with a long bear hug, Annie felt like she would be fine.

“Annika, could you come up here for a minute,” Ms. Salazar said, gesturing to her desk.

Annie nodded, going right up to the desk, “Yeah… um what’s up?”

“I wanted to apologize for my actions during the production. Looking back, I realize that i may have said some unnecessary things, and I understand if you wanted to drop this class,” Ms. Salazar explained.

Annie quickly shook her head, “No, I-I want to stay in the class, but… why were you acting like that in the first place?”

“I feel that bribing your way into the lead role is cause for a lot of eyebrow raising, but your father offered up quite a bit.”

Annie’s jaw dropped, “Wait… h-he what?!”

“Oh dear, I’m sorry. I thought you knew, I thought it was part of your idea… but yes, he bribed me into giving you the lead role,” Ms. Salazar admitted, staring at her desk.

Annie stepped back, “Oh… I um… I’m sorry, I didn’t want anything like that… sorry.”

At that point, all Annie could wait for was the final bell to ring. Her dad wasn’t even talking to her about anything that mattered. He wasn’t acting guilty. Yet he rigged the entire musical for her. Sure, she was almost positive that hse had given that role her all, but she wouldn’t have wanted it if she knew what her dad had in mind.

Finally, the last bell did ring, letting Annie out of her last class for the day. She wanted to get home on her own, but Peter ran up next to her. Any other day and she would have wanted to talk to him for hours on end, but she felt like she needed to get away from him. He was looking for her when she wanted nothing to do with her powers.

“Hey, you doing okay?” Peter asked, putting an arm around her shoulders.

Annie quickly shrugged him off, “Y-yeah, I guess.”

“Annie, really, I-I know that you’re not. You look like hell.”

“I’m fine, really. You don’t need to worry,” she insisted, walking with Peter, “Where’s Ned anyways?”

“He needed to make up a test… anyways, I’m serious, if you need to talk to anyone-”

“I do have other friends. I’m not alone, I’ll be fine,” she snapped, quickly looking down, “Sorry, I just… I’m sorry.”

“It’s okay, we don’t have to talk if you don’t want to,” Peter replied.

The walk into the subway station was silent, and Annie had a gnawing feeling in her gut. She needed to apologize or tell him or something. At the same time, she didn’t want Peter to see her any differently than he already did. It was obvious that he was scared. Not scared of her, but of what he thought she was going to do.

As they started heading in the direction of her apartment, Annie felt a knot in her stomach while they stayed silent.

“Did you eat anything? Sorry, I know you said you didn’t want to talk, but… I’m just a bit worried,” Peter started.

Annie frowned a bit, “Um… not yet, but I’ll eat something when I get home.”

“Okay… just, I know you don’t want me worrying, but I hate seeing you like this,” he replied.

“Like what?”

“Well, this is the longest I’ve talked to you all day, and I mean… I just wanted to tell you that I know what it’s like to lose someone you’re close to. A-and if I could help you, I would, but you have to tell me.”

Annie stopped in front of her building, “You actually think that you could understand what it’s like? Do you think for one second that you can compare everything going on in my life to whatever happened to you?”

“Annie, I know you’re-”

“No, you don’t fucking know anything, so please, for one goddamn second, just stop pretending like you know what I’m dealing with! Because I can tell you think you’re helping, but you’re not.”

Peter stepped back, his eyes wide and glassy with tears, “I-I’m gonna go.”

Annie quickly realized what she had said, “Peter! Wait, I didn’t…”

But he was already down the street, and he had every right to leave.

She had tried to message Peter or call him, but he wasn’t responding to her. Not that she blamed him. Annie hadn’t meant to snap at him, and the pressure from staying quiet about everything had finally caught up to her.

Finally, a video chat notification had popped up from Harper, she quickly answered it.

“Woah, Jesus Christ! You look like hell!” Harper exclaimed.

Annie shrugged, “I just got back.”

“Seriously… have you eaten at all today?”

Annie shrugged again, “I had some goldfish.”

“Goldfish isn’t a fucking food group, Ann, go grab some actual food,” Harper said, their ginger eyebrows arching up into their hairline.

Annie left for a few minutes, coming back to her desktop computer with a plate filled with a couple bread slices, cheese, deli meat, and lettuce.”

“Shit, you’re really going through it,” they commented.

Annie nodded, “No shit, I��m being accused of murder and other things.”

“Actually… those murder accusations got dropped. I’ve been following the story this whole time. The building burned because of faulty wiring and the one dude had bad luck with some of the medical equipment. You’re totally cleared.”

Her jaw dropped, “I know what happened, and you’re not gonna believe it but… Peter’s Spider-Man.”

“Coulda told you that one… tried to tell you, actually.”

“No, there’s more to it. I was listening in on him and Ned and Peter was talking to Tony Stark… and he’s trying to find White Swan, so he’s trying to find me. So… he was trying to convince him to get the charges to be dropped somehow. I guess he thought that would coax me out or something,” she explained.

Harper tilted their head and ran a hand through their ginger pixie cut, “Okay, so did you tell him?”

“No… I um… well I said some dumb shit and I guess we’re not talking and… well now I don’t know what to do.”

Harper looked at Annie through the screen, “You really did it this time, didn’t you?”

“Yeah, I did. Do you think I can fix it?”

“Sure you can, but you’ll have to tell Peter.”

Annie groaned, “I thought you would say that.”

Tag list: @flushings-here / @katherine-liz / @gaypanda / @ijustdontknowsometimes / @lionsfandomsandbearsohmy / @thwipparker / @buzzinglee / @notimeforthemessenger / @lcy-thot  / @twilightparker / @dolphinsarecuteandstuff (just ask to be added to the tag list)

[argumate]

Wonder Woman

This movie was great fun! It hit all the right notes for a superhero movie, and although it was not particularly original it was very well executed and I liked it.

 - The movie is bookended with references to Bruce Wayne, who thankfully doesn’t show up in person, so let’s just ignore those scenes. Actually I’d like to see her meet Steve Rogers, but I guess that would require corporate merger shenanigans at the highest level.

 - (Actually the movie does share plenty of tropes with Captain America: a hero taken out of time, a band of brothers in the war, a villain with apocalyptic plans, a love that is not to be, an aeroplane, but let’s not get ahead of ourselves).

 - Hot diggity, Amazon island! (I keep wanting to say they’re from the Amazon, but that isn’t right at all). It’s got unrealistic waterfalls and everything, that’s how you know it’s blessed by the gods. Oh and a forcefield bubble to keep out the rest of the world, that’s cool too.

 - This has to be the most satisfying representation of the female warrior race ever devised in the past three thousand years, and the movie could have just been two hours of Robin Wright kicking Gal Gadot’s ass while Connie Nielsen smoulders in the background and the audience would have been well satisfied.

 - No Futurama jokes were made in this review. Not even petite ones.

 - Princess Diana (wut? I only just noticed the main character is Princess Di, although in fairness they always refer to her the other way around) I mean Diana, Princess of the Amazons, has the standard chosen-by-destiny origin story and a mother who can’t bear to lose her to fate, and gives her heavily redacted stories of the past. (She boned Zeus! That’s nothing to be ashamed of, everyone has boned Zeus).

 - What could possibly trouble this peaceful island of crazy warrior ladies besides the arrival of... a man. In the form of Chris Pine, whom I must admit I was a little wary of since I haven’t seen him in any movies before so to me he’s a bit of an unknown quantity. But he’s great! In this film at least. Funny guy, charismatic, good love interest, solid support without overshadowing, I think his character works really well.

 - All that dick innuendo while he’s in the bath tho.

 - The man brings news of the Great War, and the Amazons’ sacred duty is to restore the peace... kinda. It’s a bit vague actually; the artfully rendered backstory montage of god fights certainly suggested that, but then what have they been doing for millennia on their island while wars rage across the world outside? Anyway, the bubble has been broken, a bunch of Germans got what was coming to them, Robin Wright took a bullet for Diana and will grimace no more, and Diana is just itching to go kill a god.

 - I mean seriously she is thirsty for god slaughter; when she was six years old her mother showed her the magical god-slaying sword and she literally drooled at it, this woman doesn’t even need a reason she’ll slaughter a god just for sport.

 - Sorrowful partings as Diana sails away from the only world she’s ever known, and spy boy tries to mack on her when they’re barely out of sight of shore. Lucky for him that magical force bubble shields his amorous intentions from her mother, who can and will throw a spear that far if she has to.

 - Wonder Woman, of course, is demisexual.

 - The London scenes where they try on outfits and fight spies in alleys and rustle up a posse of misfits are a lot of fun indeed, then things turn serious as they approach the Western Front. Sometimes the Great War really does feel like the abstract concept of war reified and instantiated in the world, soldiers and generals and politicians alike helplessly forced to dance to its tune without any way to stop, the logic of game theory gone mad. It’s certainly tempting to imagine that there must be an off switch somewhere, and if you could just stab the right guy everything would grind to a halt. Of course, you could say it was shooting the right guy that kicked things off in the first place.

 - Diana charges into no-mans land without even tossing her hair back first and saying “but I am no man”, but you know we were all thinking it.

 - Quick shout out to the cinema audience who laughed and gasped and cried at all the right moments, although I thought I could hear someone behind me repeating the lines slightly before they happened, perhaps closed captions? Either way it was a nice atmosphere, top stuff.

 - That charge scene though, it was something. I’ve heard it described as every woman’s experience facing a machine gun hail of microaggressions, and frankly the less said about that the better. But you can’t help thinking about the men and boys who trudged through that mud without magical shields or bracelets or plot invulnerability to bullets and were cut down in their thousands and left to rot where they fell. It was notable that when she finally reached the German trench she smashed not the soldiers, but the machine gun.

 - I think the movie handled Diana’s gradual power boost very well. She starts off capable of defeating people in hand to hand combat, and slowly levels up to the point where she is casually smashing through walls and swinging tanks through the air with one hand. Amusingly she’s so focused on her quest that she doesn’t think through the implications of her having god-like powers, and everyone around her just accepts it because honestly what else can you do? “Excuse me miss, I can’t help noticing that you just smashed face first through a brick wall and yet your lipstick is still impeccable-”

 - Perhaps her powers scale up based on having Something to Protect, and a lot of tension comes from her realising that she can’t be everywhere and can’t save everyone.

 - Wonder Woman gets busy with Chris Pine; I hope she’s gentle with her new-found strength. (She didn’t try the beer though, which bugs me a little; in fact we never see any of the Amazons eat, I think. Do they grow food on their island? I assume the climate and soil is magically good, so farming should be easy work, and they can spend the time between harvests punching each other).

 - He sketches out a future of life together and work and kids and growing old together (he don’t know she’s immortal, which saves some awkwardness). Sure would be a shame if he selflessly sacrificed himself for a noble cause, especially after he’s already signed a contract to feature in multiple movies.

 - Oh yeah, there is a ludicrously villainous German general (an actual asshole from the Real World, and future Nazi!) and a tortured femme Phantom of the Opera who delights in poison gas who sort of has a thing for him. I reckon a good relationship is one that makes both participants healthier, and what they have going on is the exact opposite of that. I don’t think they quite get enough attention, but since War is the real adversary perhaps that’s intentional.

 - There is obvious awkwardness with making the Germans the main bad guys in this story while the British push for peace, even though the film does make some token efforts at calling for a pox on both their houses. Along with Ludendorff, the real villain could be... Winston Churchill, who as Minister for Munitions at this time was in fact stockpiling a vast armoury of gas and bombs and tanks to be deployed in the offensive he was planning in 1919 that would destroy the German army and win a decisive victory for Britain. Churchill was despondent when they signed the Armistice instead and crushed his dreams of annihilation; he didn’t get his victory until 27 years later, when he finally pissed in the Rhine.

 - I’m grateful that the misfit sidekicks didn’t heroically sacrifice themselves in this movie, they needed to catch a break.

 - Ludendorff might bitch about the Dolchstoßlegende but he didn’t seem to enjoy being stabbed in the front, what a hypocrite.

 - The final showdown arrives in a blaze of rage and glory... and Remus Lupin is the god of war! Now that’s a nice twist, I appreciate a softly spoken man in a bowler hat who wishes to end the pestilence that is humanity. Turns out his powers are not what they once were (although he seems tough enough!) so he has just been chilling on Earth whispering rude thoughts in people’s ears and waiting for Diana to show up so he can make her a Darth Vaderesque offer.

 - You could say that he’s been waiting for Gadot.

 - And it’s over, god is dead and a new day dawns. The soldiers taking off their gas masks is a nice touch; it’s a shame they didn’t get to show something like the 1914 christmas football match. Ultimately the ending echoed Age of Ultron: a being of ultimate power and contempt for humanity is zapped by another being of ultimate power who believes in the redemptive power of love. So it goes.

- Terry Pratchett would say that killing the god doesn’t stop the war, but stopping the war would kill the god, divinity flowing from belief and not the other way around. If no human believed in war, what would Ares even do? Fighting for peace is always a tricky concept, but the structure of a superhero movie based on god-like physical abilities inherently demands it. This one did its best to thread that needle and didn’t mess it up too badly.

 - It’s a shame we didn’t get a reunion scene back home on the island, given that she not only achieved the destiny of her people but survived the attempt. Maybe she can’t find her way back and she’s stuck living with the humans now. The shot of her with a laptop at the end raises the disturbing scenario of Amazons tearing up social media all day instead of throwing down.

 - It’s not clear how Wonder Woman occupied her time during the Second World War and all the other craziness that filled up the 20th century, but no doubt we’ll find out. 

[withlovebangtan-blog]

Moonstruck: Chapter 5 (Final)

Chapter 1 Chapter 2 Chapter 3 Chapter 4

Genre: fluff with some angst (Jungkook x OC)

Word Count: 3.1k

Summary: You and Jungkook have been best friends for as long as you can remember. But when he starts acting strange, you begin to fear the worst. You hope that tagging along with him and his family for their annual summer trip might bring him out of his slump, but things quickly get messy as you start to question where both of you stand in your relationship. 

again i really wanna thank @boymeetsfiction and @taeklings for being so supportive towards my stories, especially this one you guys kinda gave me the motivation i needed but ANYWAYS…

The week is coming to an end.

If you thought Jungkook shutting you out was painful before, now it’s just torture. Thanks to the hell waging on outside, you’ve been stuck in the same building for three days. Three days of Jungkook barely acknowledging your presence besides a brief glance or head nod. At least before this mess, he still talked to you. Now he doesn’t even attempt to make polite conversation with you anymore, although you aren’t sure how you would react if he had.

You were beginning to miss the small things you about him. The way his slightly calloused palms feel so strong in your hand, making you feel safe and protected. How his beautiful chocolate eyes sparkle with excitement when he’s telling you a story. Things that you never knew you were taking for granted, but now you do.

You saw Jungkook just one time earlier this morning. He’d been sitting on the same stool in the kitchen, but upon seeing you enter, he offered one awkward nod as a greeting before retreating upstairs with his cup of coffee. That was about four hours ago, and you haven’t seen Jungkook since. You’re getting worried.

You try to distract yourself by reading one of the few books lying on the coffee table in the living room, but that only results in a few minutes on skimming over the pages, not even remotely paying attention to what the plot is, before letting out a frustrated sigh and closing front cover. Deciding it’s too quiet in the large room, you pick up the remote beside you and turn on the television. A commercial for laundry detergent plays. Quickly flipping through the channels, growing more and more irritated with the lack of options, you land on a romantic comedy. One of those with an unrealistic love story that sets completely unrealistic expectations for young people.

During your typical, bitter state of heartbreak after a breakup, you used to invite Jungkook over to watch films like this with you. He would sit through hours of you yelling and cursing at the leading couple. Every marathon ended in tears for you, and Jungkook would kindly stroke your hair or rub your back while he listened to you go on and on about meaningless things.

You wrap your arms around yourself, squeezing tightly.

Now, knowing how he must’ve felt the whole time, guilt weighs heavily on you. You can’t even imagine how much it hurt for him to suffer through your babbling tangents about other guys. He didn’t have to endure those countless nights of endless sobbing and screaming, but he did it anyways. For you. It was always for you.

You blink, and your eyes instantly focus again. You don’t hear the patter of rain or low rumble of distant thunder anymore. Walking over to the window on the adjacent wall, you pull back the curtain and look up. Rays of light beam down between small cracks in the dark clouds, and only a mild drizzle dampens the sand as opposed to the aggressive shower from before. Not clear enough to go out yet, but getting there.

You stand there, sliding your teeth over your bottom lip, thinking.

As the week comes closer to an end, you can sense time running out. Today is the last day you have here before having to leave the next morning. Soon after, you’ll be packing up for college. You and Jungkook will take separate classes, make new friends, and join different clubs. Will you eventually drift apart? Life is about constantly maturing, growing up. It’s only natural to lose some friends while trying to find yourself. But not Jungkook. Until now.

You jump at the sound of Mrs. Jeon yelling from down the hall, but not for you. You walk towards her calls for Jungkook and find her pacing in her robe in the kitchen, arms crossed tightly. Her face lights up when she sees you in the doorway.

“Oh! ____, have you seen Jungkook?”

You shake your head then tilt it to the side. “I thought he was in his room?”

“No I just checked there. I think he went out.” She puts her hands on her hips and turns in the direction of the door, shaking her head lightly and mumbling to herself. “That boy is always disappearing.”

You’d been so lost in thought that you didn’t even hear him leave.

“Well, I can go find him if you need me to,” you say softly.

“Could you?” She spins around, eyes bright. Brighter than they should be considering her son is technically missing. “It’s getting dark and I don’t want him out there too late.”

“Of course,” you say, mustering a sweet smile despite her unusual enthusiasm. Shouldn’t she be more worried about him? She seems almost…excited?

“Thank you, dear. You take such good care of him. He’s so lucky to have a friend like you.” She reaches out to stroke your hair fondly.

The action makes your eyes well up. You definitely don’t deserve her praises. You were so caught in yourself and your own emotions to notice how Jungkook was feeling this whole time. How could you be such a good friend for that?

You subtly push her hand away. “Okay, well…I’ll go then,” you say, suppressing a pitiful sob in the back of your throat.

The wet sand squishes between your toes, heated by the setting sun peeking out from behind the dark clouds.  Having a pretty good idea of where Jungkook might be hiding out at, you march towards the pier. You pull your phone out of your back pocket to call Jungkook, but after barely three rings, it ends. Frowning, you tap the call button again, but this time you’re sent straight to voicemail. Is he seriously ignoring your calls on purpose?

“Fine. If that’s how it’s gonna be…” you grumble under your breath.

Your feet still in the sand, ready to head in the opposite direction. What are you even doing right now? Jungkook must be pretty upset to just run away like this. And if Jungkook won’t even take your phone calls, what makes you think that he’d be willing to talk to you in person? Seeing you is probably the last thing either of you need right now.

You groan loudly in frustration and kick at the ground, paying no mind to the very few other civilians on the beach. This is completely ridiculous! You both aren’t children anymore, you need to figure things out before your entire friendship falls apart. Or maybe it already has and you just don’t realize it yet. Only one way to know for sure. Besides, you’re much more worried about Jungkook than the possibly awkward confrontation.

You start moving again.

As soon as you are within range, you cup your hands around your mouth and shout Jungkook’s name. No answer. You were expecting as much, though you still feel your stomach turn. You hurry your pace until you’re standing directly under the crisscrossing wooden beams.

Avoiding direct eye contact with the rising tide behind, you search every single perch and become more and more frantic with each empty spot you check. You find Jungkook’s cellphone, turned off, laying on top of a beam.

A splashing noise draws your attention, causing you to whip around in fear. Without another thought, you’re propelling yourself through the ice-cold water. You probably look like a lunatic, flapping your arms madly and struggling to push against the current.

Only after several seconds are you able to comprehend what you’re doing. A shriek of fear escapes your lips as you begin to thrash wildly, suddenly all too aware of the pressure on your chest. You look around and find yourself drifting further from the shore, slowly being dragged by the current. At this point, the tips of your toes are just barely touching the sand. When did you get all the way out here? The pressure increases, weighing on your lungs with every heaving breath.

Just then, two arms encircle your waist. Your entire body is lifted out of the water. You try to twist around to see the face of your savior, but before you can get a chance, you’re being thrown over their shoulder like a ragdoll. You’re completely frozen, both from terror and shock, staring down while the person carries you directly to dry land again. Finally, you’re placed down gently on the beach, still paralyzed. All you can do is stare up into the sky, where the sun is dipping under the horizon.

Jungkook’s face comes into view, eyebrows knit together in fierce concern. Water drips from his bangs and slides down his nose and cheeks. The sunset forms an orange halo around his head. When he places one hand on your cheek to turn your head and examine you closer, you have to restrain yourself from tugging him down to you.

“____, what were you doing?” The tone in his voice is enough to snap you out of it. “You know what happens when you go out there, especially during high tide. What were you thinking?” He sounds beyond pissed. But not as pissed as you feel.

“I was looking for you, you idiot. Where were you?” you demand, sitting up on your elbows to glare at him accusingly.

At that, his anger subsides into pure confusion. “What do you mean where was I? I was right here.”

“No you weren’t.” Your voice cracks on the last word, despite your anger, and your eyes mist over. You push yourself up fully now, resulting in Jungkook having to back up so you don’t collide with him. “Why didn’t you pick up when I called you?” You feel so stupid crying over something like this, but remembering that dread in the pit of your stomach you got has you breaking down.

“I just…I wanted to be alone. I didn’t know you were-“

“You didn’t answer my calls a-and then…then I can’t find you anywhere and…what was I supposed to think, Jungkook?” You’re on the verge of hysterical now, gasping for air as if you’re back in the ocean.

Jungkook’s face drops then softens in understanding, and he immediately pulls you into his chest.

“I-I thought you were…” you whisper pitifully.

“I know.” He runs his fingers over your hair. That combined with his warm breath fanning over your bare shoulder has your body instantly relaxing against him. “I’m fine,” he says. “Everything’s okay.”

“You promise?” You both know there’s more to that question.

But he just says, “I promise,” and rests his chin on the top of your head.

You sit there for another few minutes with Jungkook, leaning back on your hands to watch as the sun disappears over the sea. It’s silent, but not in the uncomfortable sense. He doesn’t make an effort to speak and neither do you.

Eventually only a small crimson orb is visible, casting a red glow over the whole beach. You try to sneak a glance at Jungkook, but he’s already staring at you, not even flinching when you catch him. At least he’s wearing a shirt. Although with the way it clings to every curve of his lean torso, it doesn’t leave much to the imagination. You look down and bite your lip, heat tickling your cheeks.

“Don’t worry, I’m not gonna kiss you this time,” he says. He’s wearing a sad smile that you match.

You should be happy right? Jungkook doesn’t hate you. You’re both still best friends. This is exactly what you wanted and yet…

It’s completely dark by the time you get back to the house. You feel a little bad considering you went looking for Jungkook to avoid coming home late. You mentally prepare yourself for a lengthy lecture from his mother, but she’s nowhere to be seen when you open the door. It is pretty late, so you decide to not question your good luck.

“I guess we should get to bed,” Jungkook says from behind you.

“Yeah. We should.”

Neither of you move an inch. He reaches up to scratch the back of his neck before walking past you to get to the stairs. “Okay. Well goodni-“

“Wait, Jungkook,” you blurt out, your hand reaching out to grasp at the air. He whirls around, eyebrows raised. But nothing comes out of your mouth.

He chuckles and shakes his head. “Goodnight, ____.”

Another nightmare.

You get out of bed and go downstairs again, but you stop in the middle of the kitchen and look out of the tiny window. You’re able to see the shimmering lights in the pool from your view, and they just look so inviting. You tiptoe down the hallway and quietly open the front door.

You sit down on the edge of the pool and dip your feet into its cool surface. It doesn’t freeze you to the bone like the sea, but it makes you feel rejuvenated like waking up from a long nap. You sigh and kick your feet.

You should be happy, so why aren’t you? Do you even want to be friends with Jungkook? You know that outgrowing people is a part of life. Maybe that’s what’s happening to you and Jungkook. Maybe you’re both just growing up and realizing that you can’t last forever. Is it time to let him go?

No. No, that can’t be right. Jungkook has been the one constant in your life through everything, every up and down. Just the idea of losing him makes your heart break.

Footsteps startle you out of your gloomy thoughts. And of course it’s Jungkook. It’s always Jungkook, coming to cheer you up or take care of you. You watch as he bends down to join you on the edge. He tilts his head back to gaze at the sky overhead.

“The stars are out,” he says. “I thought they still would’ve been covered up by the clouds.”

“Yeah. They’re pretty.” You look up briefly before returning your eyes to Jungkook’s profile. His hair is still damp, and it glistens in the moonlight. His large eyes look like they contain miniature galaxies themselves, bright with awe and the soft smile on his face.

“____-“

“Jungkook-“

You both speak at the same time, laughing a little.

“Go ahead,” you say, waving for him to proceed.

He clears his throat nervously then meets your eyes. “I don’t want things to be weird between us anymore. I want things to be how they were before, even though I know that’ll probably never happen. And it’s totally okay if you don’t feel the same way about me. I just don’t want that to change everything. I just want to be friends.”

The words practically fall out of his mouth, jumbling together into one huge sentence.

“Oh.” You break eye contact to stare at your feet, still. Friends. Right. “Okay.”

“What were you gonna say?”

“I just wanted to say um…” Your voice has gone incredibly hoarse. “Thanks. For, ya know, saving my life.”

He grins at you and flexes a bicep. “Ah, well, that’s what I’m here for.”

“I knew I shouldn’t have said anything!” You exclaim, feigning exasperation and throwing your arms up. “Why do I even bother when your ego is already so huge?”

“Huge like my muscles?”

“Ugh.” You roll your eyes as he continues to flex various parts of his body. “You’re so annoying.”

“I learn from the very best,” he winks at you.

And with that, you position one hand on his shoulder and shove as hard as you can, sending Jungkook flying into the pool. Your body is racked with fits of laughter, doubling over as Jungkook resurfaces.

“I saved your life and this is how you repay me?” he splutters in mock outrage.

“You really need to learn when to keep your mouth shu-“ You’re cut off by Jungkook grabbing your wrist and yanking you forward. You don’t even comprehend what’s happening until you’re already fully submerged.

As soon as you come back up, you start swinging at him. However, your fists and kicks hardly do any damage to him at all, much to your annoyance.

“Jungkook! My clothes!” you yell, not caring about who you might wake up.

He simply shrugs. “Eh, they weren’t as cute as those duck pajamas anyways.”

You gasp and slice your hand through the water, sending a spray of chlorine towards his face. A splashing battle ensues. He sends much bigger waves at you, but you defend yourself with short bursts. Your giggling fills the night air, and you don’t notice the way you two gravitate to each other until Jungkook’s fingers are gripping your forearms, ceasing all aquatic combat.

Everything stops. The laughing, the splashing, time, your heart. Moonlight is reflected off of the water, making his eyes sparkle, partially hidden beneath his dark fringe. The iridescent pool lights give him an ethereal glow that has you slowly moving in.

“____,” he whispers, gaze set on your lips.

“Yeah?” You can’t take your sight off of him either, following a path from his eyes to his chest and back up again, a thousand times shyer when you return to his mouth.

“Tell me.”

“Tell you what?”

“Tell me that you don’t have feelings for you. I’ll never bring it up again I swear but…” He pauses to look directly in your eyes. “You’re driving me insane.”

That’s when it hits you. A warm tingly sensation spreads throughout your body, coupled with an overwhelming fluttering in your stomach. You don’t want to be friends with Jungkook. You want something more than that. Much more.

So you do the one thing you can think of. You surge forward, creating large ripples as you slam your mouth into his. You feel him tense up for a second, as if you’ve struck him, before he grasps the meaning of your action. Suddenly his body is in motion, one hand capturing your waist while the other latches onto your jaw. You react, weaving your hands through his wet hair. The kiss is slippery and passionate and impatient, a complete mess but completely wonderful at the same time.

When you pull away, the only thing left is the sound of the distant evening tide and your panting. Jungkook leans his forehead on yours, sapped of all energy and grinning like the happiest man in the world.

“That’s definitely not helping with the whole insanity thing.” You giggle and wrap your arms around his neck.

“Sorry.”

He presses a swift kiss to the tip of your nose. “Don’t be.”

“…You know you still owe me for my clothes.”

“I know.”

A/N: its over guys :( the attention this story got is still so crazy to me but i hope everyone whos been reading really liked the ending or was at least…okay with it? as always thank you for reading at all and please please please let me know what you think. every message means so much and i love when readers interact with me so dont be scared to babes! 

[automatismoateo]

Praying isn't gonna stop wars. It never has. More people have been killed in the name of God than have been saved by him or because of him. via /r/atheism

Submitted January 08, 2020 at 02:53AM by saman65 (Via reddit https://ift.tt/37N7Owa) Praying isn't gonna stop wars. It never has. More people have been killed in the name of God than have been saved by him or because of him.

Wasn't sure where to post this. But I had to get it out. I just saw #Prayforpeace trending on twitter and thought shit, every f ing time. I picked this sub because I think the topic is related to religion just as it is political and I needed a forum where people are more ciritical thinkers than politicially biased.

This is a long one. Read if you care enough. I’m not promising to say something outrageous. Just what I think, have seen and know.

Iran is a complex country, as I’m sure most countries are. There is this great video I recommend you all to watch it from this Amazing American dude who travels all around the world! Give it a chance!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5TWNXneUrMY&t=1s

I can go into how we were happily living under a secular democratic system for a short period of time after centuries of having a Kingdom and a dictator to rule us. I always wonder what could we achieve if we didn’t have oil, if Musaddegh wasn’t as hounrable as he was and would have become a friend to the west, negotiating on a deal that would have worked for both sides, even more for the US. I have pride but I would have wanted a good relation with the west even if that meant selling out your assets/resources to a foreign nation for cheaper because the alternative has been misery for the majority of Iranians, especially in the last 15 years.

What I know is that we had a secular system, with laws based on humanity and ethics not some guy from 1400 years ago who wasn’t even a Persian. Musaddegh didn’t sell out, he was toppled, Shah was installed. Shah did great things economically which in itself is a whole story but there were still many people living in poverty who didn’t like Shah living lavishly like a KING when they could barely afford a roof over their head.

He also oppressed religious minorities to some extent, banned headscarfs and persecuted activists. Anyhow he fucked up and people believed fell for right wing promise of a religious (and secular at the same time!) Mulla revolution that will bring oil money to everyone’s table, people, not only the ones in charge!

People believed in him, Khomeini, and it turned out his promise was a lie. The opposite happened. Almost no one except the people in charge has seen any of that oil money in the past 4 decades

I come from a small town where all schools, hospital, roads, pipeline, and basically every bit of infrastructure are built by donations from a few wealthy and generous people we have.

Some facts that are barely discussed in English speaking forums. Like how 80-90% of people working for the regime and more important politicians have dual nationalities along with their spouses and kids. MANY from the US and Europe.

Ali Larijani who is the speaker of the Parliment, very anti American(politics)and also happens to also be the Leader Khamenei’s son in Law, has a daughter who lives on Ohio and has finished her medical school there. So you see in the case of a war, almost none of them are gonna get hurt. Their families will be out of Iran in matter of days.

On the recent news and incident.

I have not seen many people, in anyone in the west describing the situation in Iran correctly. Why? Well one because they are right to not believe the MSM and government’s narrative but none are talking to actual Iranians directly, neither pro Trump nor anti war people in the west.

Don't take me and my stats for my word. What I have said or am saying could be asked from any Iranian. You can find hundreds of us on social media and more than a few of them know how to communicate basic messages in English. Just talk to them. I would suggest visiting our country to get the truth but at this time I don’t recommend it at all( unless you are an activist ) but it is still risky because you can’t really report the whole truth from there. The government would only allow half of it( the part people being angry at the west, not the entire reality and the majority being angry toward the government)

Pro government people are mourning his death and anti government people ( the majority) are not. I can't say what percentages of Iranians are unhappy with the government but I know for a fact that we are in the majority, well over 70% if you ask me. Among the younger generation, which are the majority of Iranians that number is well above 90%.

If these numbers seem irrational and unrealistic, well ask yourself or look up and read the US's congress and Senate's approval rating. It isn't any better.

The anti government portion is more worry of the possibility of a war because they don't wanna die for a system they despise while pro government people are expecting demand a retaliation.

98% of people in the west are looking at this as it is a black or white situation while this couldn't be any more gray.

Soleimani was fighting isis in Iraq( in itself a good thing ) in a war that again, the majority of Iranians don't support. Iran’s alliance in Syria is of a diplomatic nature not based on humanity or saving people from isis or whatever.

Soleimani was also the guy in charge of repressing anti government protest in Iran for decades, including 2008 uprising over a rigged election ( it was actually funny how rigged it was but they still got away with it). Thousands of protesters were gunned down under his command. The protests about three months ago also resulted in over 500 death . The sad part is both the left, right nor independent channels I watch and follow really reported on this topic.

If a war breaks out, the true victims of this situation are without a doubt the majority of Iranins, getting screwed by both the Iranian regime and US government, just as we are now.

The sanctions don’t hurt the rich or the government. It hurts the middle class and poor which consist the majority of Iranians.

Living expense has increased 3,4 folds, while waging the same or doubling at max. Property value/rent has risen almost anywhere from 5-10 times ( in response to our currency tanking over sanctions Hence the poor has become extremely poor and the middle class has become poor while the wealthy which owns property and materials like cars have become millionaires and extra wealthy even wealthier!

The cheapest (one of the shittiest available) car made in Iran, Kia Pride, (a newer version an old Kia Pride model) goes for 70 M toman brand new. The same car was 6 million a decade ago. I remember it being 6 million since I was a kid and …. That’s where we are after 10 years of sanctions.

Ok I will end this rant now

Neither pro war nor anti war people in the US are right on their report of the situation.

pro war people:

Soleimani is bad (true but not for the reason they say.)

Iran government bad(true, but is US government doing anyone any good?)

95% want government gone( not really that high. Unfortunately US's response and actions has given government more support no matter how much they suck. Trump killing Soleimani this way pushes people who are in the middle to the government’s side. So will a war. Saddam’s invasion with West’s “go ahead and blessing” only made the recently won revolution more popular, so will a war waged against a despised regime and forcing people to fight for a system that has oppressed them all their life, taking away the basic freedom and choices a human deserves.

I’d like to believe the regime doesn’t have more than 20% support but I don’t have a number on that. It is hard to conduct independent surveys with the limited freedoms of speech and press we have. if you live among Iranians, it won’t take you more than a week to realize the majority want a total reform.

-90% would love us to bomb them!(false). Like I said, the Iranian civilians will pay the highest cost for that war. Looking at our neighbors, they don’t seem to be better off than they were before US’s invasion.

Anti war people:

-Soleimani was good(false. Fighting isis doesn't make him a good guy! He wasn't fighting them to defend his people, for a good cause even though he believed that. Iran’s fight against ISIS has nothing to do with what the majority of Iranians wanted).

-Iran government good: (false) Not all of them are pushing this narrative. Secular talk and Kim Iverson on youtube have both correctly reported that Iranians are very unhappy with their government. Yet 95% of the left, anti war voices on the right and independents who are calling out Trump on this ignore this part. I know why they are doing it though. One you agree with the CIA’s talking point that X is a bad guy, then they say “well we have to do something about it don’t we?” and many people with good intentions would think that’s the right thing to do! Manufacturing conset I suppose it is called. Or maybe I’m wrong. But in this case, the bad guy is really bad! I’m upset they don’t say it but what I care more is me, my relatives and my compatriots not getting bombed. So I’m thankful to every anti war voice on the left, right and independent, even if they are reporting what goes on inside Iran not accurately.

-The majority don't want a war(true!) I don’t think this needs an explanation.

I'm personally not saddened even for a bit over Soleimani’s death news, but the possibility of a war has made me quit worry. I’ve always been afraid of war. Not dying in it but surviving it while many of the people I know and care for don't.

My number are my opinions and what I perceive. I encourage everyone to their own research on the things they can find online and talk to Iranians, the one who live in Iran, if you want to know how they feel about this situation! You will find many people angry at the government who would love anything, including a war, as oppose to the current situation but the majority don't want a war.

I’d like to leave it with a positive note which is a fact. Americans are probably the most liked(more like adored!) nationality for Iranians. Again I encourage all you to watch Peters video on Iran. Take his word for it not mine

For me personally, the most welcoming and warm people I have met in my life have been Americans and I have lived a few countries.

This war isn’t between us, the people, but sadly it is us who have to fight the wars. Praying and asking God to help isn't gonna do shit. Speaking to each other, believing in ourseleves, it can make a difference.

Forgive my grammar,spelling and poor writing skills.

Peace.

[trendingnewsb]

How Being True to You Gets You Back on Track When You Feel Lost

You often hear people say, ‘be yourself’ or ‘be true to yourself’ or ‘just be you’. Many legendary quotes speak to this concept and it is one of the topics about which I’m most passionate.

I deeply believe (and have experienced this with hundreds of people) that if we are ‘true to ourselves’, we will experience greater success and more fulfillment with less stress and frustration along the way.

My primary goal as a coach and consultant, is to help people do just that — to live a life of greater happiness, fulfillment and success; to get them from where they are, to where they want to be by removing any obstacles along the way; and to help them take one step closer, towards health, towards balance, towards wholeness.

While there are many (awesome) books, courses, programs, and words of advice on living a life you love, I always come back to the conclusion that the fastest way to get there, is to be true to you and get back to who you are.

In this article, I will share with you the importance of being true to yourself to get back on track.

There is no place like home – your true self

In the movie “The Wizard of Oz”, Dorothy taps her ruby red slippers together and repeats “There’s no place like home, there’s no place like home, there’s no place like home…”

The same is true for each of us. There’s no place like home. There is a core in each of us where we thrive. This place or “state”  is a reservoir from which we generate health and energy. And ultimately your body, your mind, your spirit all yearn to get back to this “home.”

Much of our stress, our angst, and our frustration is caused by being disconnected from, or out of alignment with the source of who we are.

Why people stop being true to themselves

From a  young age, we are pulled off track from being true to ourselves by well-meaning family members, teachers, the education system, our communities and society.

Perhaps you were told to be quiet when you had  much to say; or maybe your curiosity was crushed when your ‘whys’ were met with ‘because I said so’; or your creativity and free spirit were suffocated when you were forced to fit in and sit quietly in a traditional classroom setting.

There are hundreds of examples of this, and I’m sure you have your own.

In fact, we as a culture, as a society, as humanity, are derailed now, more than ever. We are thrown off by the multitude of challenges in our own lives, by what’s happening in our countries and the world. There are unrealistic expectations and demands coming from every direction.

We are pulled off track by our 24-hour, technology-fueled world. We are being pulled in different and sometimes even opposite directions, playing the many roles in our lives – employee, friend, parent, partner. All of these diverse roles have their own demands and expectations.

We read books about how we should do things, take courses on what we are supposed to do and try to model what we see others doing  to improve ourselves or be the right influence on others. And depending on the day of the week, or time of the year, or the newest article or study……the advice is often different and conflicting!

What happen if you are not true to yourself

It’s no wonder there are such staggering statistics around stress, health and well-being, especially here in the U.S:

77% of Americans find themselves regularly experiencing physical and emotional symptoms of stress

Over 50% of adults have a chronic health issue including heart disease, stroke, chancer, type 2 diabetes, obesity and arthritis.

55% of people regularly take a prescription medicine.

Worldwide, the most recent Gallup poll showed that 85% of people worldwide hate their jobs.

Sadly, I could go on. But I won’t. Hopefully, you get the point I’m trying to make here.

For one reason or another, we are disconnected from our core self, we have slipped out of alignment with who we really are, and what we already know. And that friction, that pull is having widespread and significant consequences to us each individually, and the health of our communities, organizations and, honestly the world.

Let’s think of ‘being true to self’ as a magnet. Your core self is compelled to get back ‘home’, it is your ‘truing mechanism’. But life’s circumstances and crises may actually have a stronger and demanding pull. As you get pulled from your home base, it’s like a magnet being wrenched from its attachment.

What happens when you pull a magnet away? It gets shaky, it tries to get back. But if you let it, it will snap right back into place. Again, if you try to pull it away, it shakes again. Think of this shakiness as the magnet’s way of saying, “Please!  I want to get back home. I need to get back home.”   

The warning signs (that you ignore)

Now think of this for yourself. When you get separated from your core self, from being true to you, what do you experience?  Do you get ‘shaky’ like the magnet?

This ‘disorientation” can manifest as:

Physical symptoms such as low energy, headaches, stomach issues, tense muscles, frequent colds and infections, rapid heartbeat, chest pain, you name it.

Emotional symptoms can include feelings of anger, frustration, being overwhelmed, loneliness and eventually depression or anxiety.

These ‘warning signs’ are your body’s way of saying, I want to get back home, I need to be there.

But most of the time, we ignore them. We keep pushing them down or forcing our way through. If we get a headache, we take some Advil; if we have high blood pressure, we get a prescription; if we feel depressed or anxious, we drink a bottle of wine, or take a tranquilizer.

But the reason those things are showing up, is to tell you something. Your body may be telling or even screaming at you that something is not working. What we really need to do is pause and identify the ‘why’ behind the symptoms we are experiencing. These often relate to us being off track from our true selves and what works best for us.

The unwanted consequence

What happens if you pull that magnet completely apart? What happens when you pull it so far away that it can’t find ‘home’ anymore?

It loses its sense of self. Like a compass that has lost its ‘true north’. You have no sense of direction, you are lost, confused and anxious.

Without this sense of ‘belonging’, you might experience feeling like you’re going off the rails, about to crash and burn. This is what’s happening to too many of us. We don’t even know where ‘home’  is anymore.

But you DO. Your core sense of self knows! It knows exactly where home is.

How to be true to you and get back on track

You might, at this point, be thinking this all sounds wonderful.  But how do you get back on track? Some of you might even be wondering what being true to yourself even looks like any more.

Here are 11 ways to be true to you and get back on track again:

1. Identify what you need to thrive

One way to figure this out is to think about times in your life when you felt fantastic. On top of things, under control, in the ‘zone’.

Think about times in your life when you felt most happy, fulfilled and successful. Write them down.

Now, think about what was it about those times that made them so great? Was it the environment you were in? The people you were surrounded by? Something you were building or creating? Or maybe a feeling you had? Maybe you had a clear picture, a plan, a purpose or challenge?

2. Think about what makes you happy

Genuinely happy! What makes you feel joy? Laugh? What do you love to do? Are you doing that? Why not? How can you live more in touch with your passions or be doing more of the things that make you happy?

3. Pinpoint what makes you feel most like you

Think about when you feel most like yourself. What makes you feel connected, grounded and centered with who you are.

Is it time with friends and family? Meditation or Yoga? Being a complete badass, adventurous risktaker? Connecting with something deeper and more significant on a spiritual level? How can you get more of that in your life? What nourishes your soul at a deep level?

4. Know when you don’t feel like you

In order to get back on track, you have to know you’re off track in the first place. That’s why it’s just as important to know when you don’t feel like you.

How do you know when things aren’t working for you? Think about what pulls you out of stride? We talked before about physical and emotional symptoms that show up. What are those for you? What do you think, hear or feel?

Notice. Pay attention to these ‘early warning signals’ your mind and body are sending you.

5. Look at your core values

Do you know what’s most important to you? How can you reprioritize and put those things first? If one of your core values is family, how can you live that more? Maybe it’s health, what are you doing towards greater health?

6. Use your talents

What are the innate strengths or talents that you could be using more? Your inner genius? Are you amazing at solving problems, listening to friends or cooking healthy, wholesome food? Where can you use that talent, now?

7. Connect with your purpose

Some people are very clear about their purpose, others are still searching. I know this is a big one.

Even if you aren’t clear on what your purpose is, are you living each day with purpose? On purpose? With a clear intention?  Or have you been pulled off track by distractions, expectations or life?

8. Focus on taking care of all of you

Get back to basics with healthy eating and living. Focus on your overall wellness. Take care of your body. Does that mean you need to exercise more? Sleep more? Mediate more often? Eat less?

I’m a big advocate of a healthy body. While I believe this piece is important, it’s also important to note that you could work days and years on your health, nutrition, hydration, etc. But if you don’t take a step back and look at the energetic pieces of you, you’re not going to make much progress.

9. Rediscover what you loved to do before things got so busy

Was it hiking outdoors? Being with friends? Sitting in the library reading a good book? Doing absolutely nothing at all?

10. Take a test

I know this might sound odd when you’re trying to find yourself. And yes, the answers are inside of you. However, I know that soul searching can be tough work. Sometimes, it helps to get a little jump start.

My favorite test to help you figure out what being true to you actually looks like — The Instinctive Drives (I.D.). It identifies what you need to be at your best. Check out the test here: The Instinctive Drives (I.D.)

It’s different to other tools I’ve tried because instead of focusing on personality or your behavior, it digs deep into the core, the innate part of you, and helps you understand what you need to thrive.

11. Let go

Let go of the expectations of others that aren’t serving you. Let go of the way you ‘should’ do things. Let go of who you are ‘trying’ to be and instead, try being you.

We try so hard to please, to meet expectations, to make others happy or to fit in. Much about being true to you is about what you let go of as much as what you hold on to.

I once read a quote that fits this sentiment perfectly:

Take your first step

As you might imagine, you don’t have to do all 11 of these to get back on track. Just one step in the right direction will start to lead you home.

How do you know which one to start with? Like the magnet, see which ones ‘attract’ you. Which one of these resonated most with you? If you’re not sure, read them again, and see which one(s) have that magnetic pull. Your core self knows which one of these is the next right thing to focus on for YOU.

The next step?

Take a step. One step to bring you closer to you. One step to get back on track. One step towards being true to yourself.

What is that step for you?

Featured photo credit: finda via finda.photo

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