#that was very hard for me
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i almost never do vent art, much less post it but man, i have been feeling bummed out recently
#i feel very protective of nerdy male people#yes even the gross incel-y ones tbh#is hard for me not to sympathize considering i used to be one of them
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she's singing in another room and my dog is asleep at my feet. my grandma asked me why i haven't found a man yet and i laughed. oh, you know. i like my house clean.
my girlfriend is also my man is also "my partner" if i'm in a professional setting. yesterday we went to a ren faire and a man mimed at me - you're together? and at my delighted nod, his baffled, you're gay? made me laugh. a woman with rainbow hair said i love the two of you together. you're both so beautiful it's absurd.
my dad introduced my partner as my "..... friend. or whatever" the other day. he knows we're dating. in the same way, i was never able to get my sister's husband to stop saying that's gay like it's 2008. he still uses the word fa***t, and my sister's defense of him has always been well, he's just kidding.
my lover and i dance to old music in a tiny kitchen. we judge new music together and take food critique very seriously. we watch love is blind before we fall asleep and agree that if they had a queer season, it would be bloody but also make for excellent tv. of fucking course queer people would know someone for only 2 weeks and agree to get married. what are you saying.
at a bar with friends, a man puts his hand on my wrist. got a boyfriend? and yes, i do have a boyfriend, she's amazing. i am texting her while i wander around a gas station named after geese. i am visiting a swing state for a wedding. in the candy aisle i overhear: she's actually like a lesbian it's disgusting. two teenage girls with packaged sandwiches in their hands, giggling. no literally, like. i'm not, like. okay with her being there while we're all, like, naked and changing.
my girlfriend and i tailgate, drink gin and cider out of cups. from the frat group beside us, a man corrects himself with one of his friends: bro, i mean, nonbinary entity, and it makes everyone around him laugh, myself included. he razzes his friend the same way i would have killed for at 19 years old - like nothing happened, he continues: you apply sunscreen like an alien. he does a little sassy (and fairly accurate) dance interpretation of the motion. his friend is laughing so hard they're crying.
i am lucky, i live in a safe neighborhood in a safe state. my masc passenger princess comes up from DC. i drive her for an hour to where all the leaves are a violent arrangement of color. we walk along the trails, letting autumn into our blood. in this part of the state, there's a lot of pickup trucks and trump signs. when we chastely kiss before getting into the car, i accidentally make eye contact with a woman holding her child's wrist. she looks disgusted. she looks fucking pissed.
two hours later my girl and i are eating dinner on a patio, soaking in the last warmth of new england sun before the chill of winter sets in. we are giggling and trying to talk through plastic vampire teeth. at another table, i see a young woman sit up straighter. i watch her watch us. she blushes and takes her partner's hand from across the table. shy, like the taste of evening has just become something deeper.
it's worth it for this moment, i think. my lover is still humming the same song she's been singing for four days straight and i don't want to kill her for it. her guitar is beside my bed. her toothbrush is in my bathroom. in a few moments i will make us lunch. we are lucky enough to have found each other. it is lucky enough to be in love.
#writeblr#wlw#i often think about like.....#being happy in a gay relationship is sometimes so odd#bc u can forget how stupid ppl are.#bc ur so USED to being gay. and u forget other people GENUINELY ARE homophobic#so it's like. girl pardon?????#but also there are moments where it's like. ohhh the kids are alright#like watching someone razz someone else.... so fucking wholesome#“lemme get this bitche's pronouns before i make gentle fun of them” .... i would have KILLED for that.#THAT is how u know ur accepted#not just tolerated#..... when ppl are like. sure ur nonbinary congrats but WHAT is this fucking sunscreen application#ps idk if "razz'' is a real word but someone asked what it means -#i've always heard it as being a term for 'gentle & friendly teasing'' which like#i personally notice more from my guy friends but is like - when a person isn't#LIKE ACTUALLY teasing u (it's nothing personal/mean) they're just laughing w/you about something#my friends often put on a little voice and call me an anemic little bitch#like 'ooooo the anemic little bitch is cold??? does she need a mouse blanket#bc she's SOOOO SMALL AND ANEMIC???''#and it doesn't hurt my feelings (it makes me laugh very hard) bc 1. i actually called MYSELF that first#and 2. i'm not sensitive about it!!!#a proper razz is when you are ALSO in on the joke - i ALSO think it's funny#for some people i personally find that when they razz u it's when they love u -#they've noticed something genuine about u and love u enough that u know they're not being mean#this is cultural and personality based of course but i'm hispanic#if someone isn't making fun of me it means they hate me . obviously.
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would you bite the hand that feeds you?
#pearlescentmoon#smajor1995#wild life smp#namemc spoilers#i hope these two never get along in the storyline i find them fascinating#OKAY SO#originally i had this sketch back in session 2 when scott manages to throw her something actually edible JUST IN TIME#and now with the namemc spoilers of pearl ACTUALLY having a yellow eye which does! kind of match scotts esp since he died for this#i figured itd be an appropriate time#i did edit it though the original was pearl eating smth#now do i think scott and pearl has had any Major (heh) interactions to warrant this fanart in WL?#frankly no LMAO theyve been very civil you go guys . but i like the dynamics between them anyway#also i finally got a piece with scott!!! hes been very hard to draw goodness#anyway long rambly tags#eydidraws#my art#mcyt#trafficblr#galaxyduo#majormoon#** i say civil because its just been more on verbal light jabs at each other rather than anything Really significant ?#and well. its obvious all 3Gs are being very careful around each other which makes me JUST A L IL SAD#id love to see them let loose and be vicious but i also understand the angle theyre coming from#anyway can you tell i like the 3g dynamics
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I think my copy of the game is broken they've been doing this for 30 minutes
Crop of the Biolizard edit I did bc it makes me laugh:
#art#sonic the hedgehog#sonic#shadow the hedgehog#rouge the bat#their dynamic is so funny to me like hello what episode of Untucked is this#I am rotating them in a 2 bed 1 bath apartment in my mind#Also very proud of how this turned out I think I'm finally finding a comic rendering style that doesn't make me want to rip my hair out#Simplify baybee it's a comic not an illustration you can get a little crazy with it#Spoiler alert. Getting looser with lineart and better at colour schemes and simplifying shading. Is good actually.#It's so much easier to eyeball what a colour would look like in a setting instead of colourpicking the OG palette and struggling with...#...like 9 overlay and multiply and soft/hard light layers#Approximating colour genuinely looks better than forcing local colour into the piece. As long as the values are still there it works out#comic
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This might be the last time we see Tom Hardy Venom on screen so I just wanna say, from the bottom of my monster fucker heart, it has been an absolute pleasure to go through this series with you all these last 6 years.
#venom#venom 2018#eddie brock#anne weying#venom the last dance#mrs chen#Tom Hardy#you will always be iconic to me#and I will remember you so fondly forever#symbrock#venom let there be carnage#let there be carnage#I’m in shambles#I’ve been crying all day#I’ve had so many experiences because of these movies#I have one of my very best friends in the world because of this series#and I will cry so so hard during this film
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Art School AU LOL 🦌🎨 based on true stories hahaha
#my professors have very interesting personalities#this honestly may be a way for me to unwind from school#strip comics every now and then#school is gonna be so hard!!#but I’m really excited I think I’m gonna grow A LOT#but it’s sad when you don’t have time for your favorite hobby sighhh#such is the way of a scholar#pfft#hazbin hotel#my doods#alastor#hazbin hotel fanart#niffty#angel dust#charlie morningstar#lucifer hazbin
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sometimes you just need to hear it v some stills below the cut v
#fnaf#five nights at freddy's#fnaf security breach#fnaf daycare attendant#fnaf sun moon#dca fandom#dca x y/n#artists on tumblr#fan art#digital art#animation#gif#watercolour background from unsplash!! (phenomenal free photos website)#it's been a tough one lately!!! ooooh boy#its hard to caption this one because I fundamentally want to stay positive but it's been.. difficult. with everything going on in the world#so I broke this WIP out from a few months ago when i was having a bad episode of my own and was trying to make something to get me thru it#i felt like it was worth finishing and sharing now#If you're someone that needs art to get through scary stuff (i very much am) then we're in this together!#I'm gonna keep making stuff and cherishing this community#and we're gonna get through it all together <3
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I'll give them shelter like you've done for me
#my art#jujutsu kaisen#jjk#jjk fanart#jujutsu kaisen fanart#megumi fushiguro#yuji itadori#itafushi#jjk spoilers#jjk manga spoilers#jjk leaks#jjk art#fushiguro tsumiki#took all afternoon but we wrangled the colours in2 submission#it was looking very green and kind of muddy#so i toned down the saturation in a bunch of places pulled in a lot more grey#kept a lot of the shadows Hard#i think it works#not sure it's the absolute best it cld be but i am Satisfied with it#overall i ws just kind of worried that it was looking rly similar to past pieces colour-wise#i think it kind of still Is but not as much as it would have been had i not made those edits#anyway. emo hours#ive been listening to jubyphonic's piano arr of shelter and thinking abt megumi#thinking abt him growing up n looking back on himself n seeing himself in tht lonely little boy#'it's a long way forward so trust in me' smth smth finding the strength to guide that kid forward even though both of u are scared#bc at the end of the day u Are still that kid#inner child stuff usually doesnt resonate much with me bc i don't like who i was/am/whatever this aint abt me#but in regards to megumi????? OW#in lighter news i remembered at the absolute last minute to lob off the top of yuuji's ear#bc that injury at least i think he keeps ghfssdfhfgsj
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These clown animatronics in FNAF wild as hell..
#myart#chloesimagination#comic#fnaf#five nights at freddy's#fnaf fanart#ennard#the mimic#jackie fnaf#fnaf sister location#secret of the mimic#michael afton#I really wanted to draw Jackie again#I love her design especially her silly extendo arms#some folks think Ennard and Jackie might be the same robot#like Ennard was gonna be a Funtime Jackie#which I think would be really neat to finally know what Ennard was supposed to be#Jackie hopeful gets along with the other clown animatronics#it’s funny to compare these two#CAUSE AS OF NOW Jackie has done much#we won’t know all her crimes till later#but I will say Ennard probably set the bar 💀#it’s hard to get more freaky than him but we’ll see if Jackie can do it#Jackie gives me very ‘cheesed to meet you’ vibes if that makes any sense
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ok gayboy
#LOTUS PERSONA ART LETS GOOOOOOOO IT ONLY TOOK ME FIVE FUCKING MONTHS#this is for the three ppl that follow me and know about persona eat up my loves 😍#i love narcissistic bastards who are doomed by the narrative he's a keeper fs#(idk anything abt akechi except hes a gayass detective and loves pancakes and is a tsundere /JJJJJJJ)#he has this sopping wet quality about him that i adore very much. it's the homosexuality i think#persona 5#persona 5 royal#p5#p5r#akechi goro#goro akechi#lotus draws#bro why is his hair so fucking hard to draw it's like chuuya's but if he used a straightening iron#speaking of him this is the hair color i wish he had :(((( my fav hair color frfr it exceeds every other one#the light desaturated brown with hints of russet MWAH MWAH#anyway it's three on a school night i think i should sleep ig😔
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I want to post this here too because I’ve seen it happen a few times
Please understand that there are cultural differences and language differences, if you see this happening let the person clarify what they meant, that person might just not be familiar with words the western side of the internet use
#bearz rambling tag#no it’s not really possible to let everyone who uses this term to change#because as far as I know this is the most common word with use on Chinese websites#I didn’t know that pairing are called ‘ship’ here#like why would I even know that#‘ship’ makes zero sense to me#it took me a while to learn the fandom language people speak here#it’s hard#give people time#shipping culture is very different too#Like on Chinese site you HAVE to clarify the Top and the Bottom of this ship in the ship name#it is very very important to them#people who like the same ship but with different Top Bottom preference will fight till no end#imagine how confused I was when I first got here#where there’s no top bottom differences#it’s not really a smut thing#it’s more a dynamic thing#AxB and BxA is very different#oh I can talk so much about the differences on fandom cultures#if ya are interested in more please feel free to ask#it’s very interesting to me#I wanna talk about it
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having good & true friends will literally save and protect you in a million unfathomable ways. like okay we have written so many times about lovers. but the way a platonic friend laughs and cries with you. the way they hold your hand at 14 years old and at 34. the way they keep a little silver tie to you, touching base over and over and over. how you can go years without talking, only to re-meet and discover: oh shit! you're still cool!
there are people who have been in my life for more than half of it, and i have loved every version of them. do you know how fucking beautiful that is. yeah love will save the world. but the way friends love you is gonna save the you.
#and before one of u is like '' i have no friends :(" i used to be there too actually#abusive partner cut me off from ALL of 'em. i didn't think i was lovable#it made me EXCEPTIONALLY shy. i still am actually!!!!#i just ... started saying ''yes.''#i would take pictures of flyers in my library and go to whatever events they had#i started taking community classes#if someone mentioned like ''i am gonna start x group'' i actually took a deep breath#and approached them to be like . okay i want in.#i started making the first move with new people - a small compliment#a smile or a little joke. just to share the space with them.#i have MASSIVE social anxiety. bad parent and bad relationship will do that to ya.#but i just... kept going. and going. and going. to each of these little things. and then...#like. .... idk i just am very blessed. i have a STUPID number of friends#a lot of which i reconnected with. bc it turns out love is never wasted. adult life just.#like. gets in the way. but also... i loved u as a weird little kid. i love u now as a weird big adult.#i promise i PROMISE ur friends are out there. u just have 2 find them. and btw#i didn't make friends with everyone. but i did get a lot of people to smile or laugh.#aint that something.#this process took me something like 2 years. it was HARD!!!!!!!!!!#i love u!!! hard things are often worth it!!!
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You don't wish your disability was worse or more visible, you wish your disability was taken seriously. Please stop confusing the two, I guarantee you would not get the support you need JUST by being more severe or more visible. Please listen to visibly disabled people when we tell you it isn't better on our side
#m/cc#mine#I tried extremely hard to word this nicely because I KNOW people don't mean bad and often even know there are unique challenges#and believe me I know the challenges of invisible disability too!!#I have invisible disabilities!#but as someone who has also been at least visibly 'off' since they were 10 I am SO SICK of invisible disabilities being hailed as like#a unique extra oppression that us lucky visibly disabled people don't have to deal with#there are challenges to invisible disabilities that visibly disabled people DON'T have to deal with!#but you need to understand that *the reverse is also true*#there are MASSIVE benefits to being able to lie about your disability for example#or not dealing with the overt ableism that comes with your disability being obvious to everyone#*I do not have the option to pretend I'm not disabled.* that is never an option I have#I walk weirdly. I use a mobility aid now. my speech and face are 'off.' I lean to one side#for a long time I wore sunglasses 24/7 and often didn't make sense. I sometimes can't speak or won't react to others#for the most part people will always know that at the very least something is wrong with me#and more obviously I have people telling me they'll pray for me; telling me I can't do things I'm already in the process of doing;#wanting to shake my hand to tell me I'm an inspiration for not killing myself; giving me dirty looks for existing in public#and yes. I'm aware that this is very much an in-community issue. I know the average abled person doesn't know invisible disabilities exist#that's why there's so much awareness happening for it#but as a visibly disabled person I get SO TIRED of constantly hearing 'I wish my disability was visible :'('#it's just 'I wish I had your disability!' but from other disabled people
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reminiscing about childhood books after that ask - all due respect to cool sleek movie toothless....but to me, he will always be a mean little gremlin
#my art#dragon#illustration#how to train your dragon#httyd#httyd books#i love you small toothless. i love you and your beautiful eyelashes. you are not overshadowed to me#also fireworm (top right) and monstrous nightmares as a whole were SO influential on my art and also my ocs#i never thought about it until very recently but my god. my god. so obviously a heavy influence on florawell especially#i drew her a lot as a kid she was my fav. cause she was mean and snooty. nowadays i do appreciate the ugliness of seaslug though#i wanna read the end of that series eventually....get some childhood closure#cressida cowell's drawing style is so charming and good...like drawing intentionally ''bad'' (10000 quotation marks) is so hard to pull off
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Thinking a lot about my wife and how much I miss him
(I draw a lot of K/S that are just fused TOS and AOS so I wanted to draw out how Bones was fused in my brain)
#my art#star trek#mcspirk#bones mccoy#leonard mccoy#leonard bones mccoy#doctor mccoy#dr mccoy#drawtober got put on hold#maid dresses stumped me so hard I had to take a whole break about it#which objectively is very funny to me
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I love a man who needs to be put in a mental ward but looks angelic being insane
#ff7#final fantasy 7#ffvii#final fantasy vii#sephiroth#was trying really hard to avoid side profile but oh! i can't#and sorry to everyone who saw me draw him clothless twice in a row#not very demure of me!#so embarrassing actually goodness
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