#that was so fucking funny!
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foolish's feral scream bc cucurucho destroyed the cloud heklp
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nearly had a medical emergency today because - and i cannot stress enough how little i am making this up - a helicopter landed in front of an open grain silo while i was getting off my ship and i am deathly allergic to the wheat that said helicopters rotor blades proceeded to blast in my face at full force. the cosmic forces are plotting against me ass situation to be in
#my brother going OH FUCK GLUTEN BLAST was funny though so points taken#if somebody has cast a curse on me or something can you please undo it i will meet your demands for ramson
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she's singing in another room and my dog is asleep at my feet. my grandma asked me why i haven't found a man yet and i laughed. oh, you know. i like my house clean.
my girlfriend is also my man is also "my partner" if i'm in a professional setting. yesterday we went to a ren faire and a man mimed at me - you're together? and at my delighted nod, his baffled, you're gay? made me laugh. a woman with rainbow hair said i love the two of you together. you're both so beautiful it's absurd.
my dad introduced my partner as my "..... friend. or whatever" the other day. he knows we're dating. in the same way, i was never able to get my sister's husband to stop saying that's gay like it's 2008. he still uses the word fa***t, and my sister's defense of him has always been well, he's just kidding.
my lover and i dance to old music in a tiny kitchen. we judge new music together and take food critique very seriously. we watch love is blind before we fall asleep and agree that if they had a queer season, it would be bloody but also make for excellent tv. of fucking course queer people would know someone for only 2 weeks and agree to get married. what are you saying.
at a bar with friends, a man puts his hand on my wrist. got a boyfriend? and yes, i do have a boyfriend, she's amazing. i am texting her while i wander around a gas station named after geese. i am visiting a swing state for a wedding. in the candy aisle i overhear: she's actually like a lesbian it's disgusting. two teenage girls with packaged sandwiches in their hands, giggling. no literally, like. i'm not, like. okay with her being there while we're all, like, naked and changing.
my girlfriend and i tailgate, drink gin and cider out of cups. from the frat group beside us, a man corrects himself with one of his friends: bro, i mean, nonbinary entity, and it makes everyone around him laugh, myself included. he razzes his friend the same way i would have killed for at 19 years old - like nothing happened, he continues: you apply sunscreen like an alien. he does a little sassy (and fairly accurate) dance interpretation of the motion. his friend is laughing so hard they're crying.
i am lucky, i live in a safe neighborhood in a safe state. my masc passenger princess comes up from DC. i drive her for an hour to where all the leaves are a violent arrangement of color. we walk along the trails, letting autumn into our blood. in this part of the state, there's a lot of pickup trucks and trump signs. when we chastely kiss before getting into the car, i accidentally make eye contact with a woman holding her child's wrist. she looks disgusted. she looks fucking pissed.
two hours later my girl and i are eating dinner on a patio, soaking in the last warmth of new england sun before the chill of winter sets in. we are giggling and trying to talk through plastic vampire teeth. at another table, i see a young woman sit up straighter. i watch her watch us. she blushes and takes her partner's hand from across the table. shy, like the taste of evening has just become something deeper.
it's worth it for this moment, i think. my lover is still humming the same song she's been singing for four days straight and i don't want to kill her for it. her guitar is beside my bed. her toothbrush is in my bathroom. in a few moments i will make us lunch. we are lucky enough to have found each other. it is lucky enough to be in love.
#writeblr#wlw#i often think about like.....#being happy in a gay relationship is sometimes so odd#bc u can forget how stupid ppl are.#bc ur so USED to being gay. and u forget other people GENUINELY ARE homophobic#so it's like. girl pardon?????#but also there are moments where it's like. ohhh the kids are alright#like watching someone razz someone else.... so fucking wholesome#“lemme get this bitche's pronouns before i make gentle fun of them” .... i would have KILLED for that.#THAT is how u know ur accepted#not just tolerated#..... when ppl are like. sure ur nonbinary congrats but WHAT is this fucking sunscreen application#ps idk if "razz'' is a real word but someone asked what it means -#i've always heard it as being a term for 'gentle & friendly teasing'' which like#i personally notice more from my guy friends but is like - when a person isn't#LIKE ACTUALLY teasing u (it's nothing personal/mean) they're just laughing w/you about something#my friends often put on a little voice and call me an anemic little bitch#like 'ooooo the anemic little bitch is cold??? does she need a mouse blanket#bc she's SOOOO SMALL AND ANEMIC???''#and it doesn't hurt my feelings (it makes me laugh very hard) bc 1. i actually called MYSELF that first#and 2. i'm not sensitive about it!!!#a proper razz is when you are ALSO in on the joke - i ALSO think it's funny#for some people i personally find that when they razz u it's when they love u -#they've noticed something genuine about u and love u enough that u know they're not being mean#this is cultural and personality based of course but i'm hispanic#if someone isn't making fun of me it means they hate me . obviously.
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hey i can't make it to Sorry For Visiting Wanton Destruction Upon Your Populace For No Reason Day yeah uhm its just that like you didn't invite my war crime friend and i think its kinda fucked up that you did that
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spock’s room decor is actually fucking bonkers. The weapons??? the big red velvet curtain??? like ok phantom of the opera go crazy.
for reference jim’s room has some photos and a plant so we can surmise this is uniquely a spock being a dramatic weirdo thing
#spock baby im sorry but it looks like the backdrop of one of those alpha male podcasts#nurse chapel is stronger then me because if i saw this frat boy ass decor i would have immediately gotten the ick and left#the lack of coherent design is so funny#ALSO CAN WE TALK ABOUT HOW TO CURTAIN IS COVERING THE SHELVES WHICH IS SUCH A SMALL THING BUT IT MAKES ME SO MAD WHY SPOCK WHY#i hope bones never saw this room because he would have a fucking field day#star trek#star trek tos#spirk#jim kirk#spock#tos
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touden stare down
#THEYRE SO WEIRD (AFFECTIONATE)#autism siblings save me . save me autism siblings.#toshiro 🤝 touden siblings . tha autistic spectrum staring responses#dungeon meshi#dunmeshi#laios touden#falin touden#toshiro nakamoto#this is so fucking funny
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today at work i got hit with a plane
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lesbian situationship vs gay situationship
#arcane#arcane s2#vi#caitlyn kiramman#caitvi#jayce talis#viktor#jayvik#this is so funny to me#they got fucked UP#jayce also high key looking fine as hell#i just need viktor to be alive im so scared#vi arcane#viktor arcane
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I can’t stop laughing at this
#Steven universe#steven universe future#Its so fucking funny#whoever wrote the episode summaries you’re a legend
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Rewatched episode 1, have we considered this?
#he wants to bonk the tv man so bad#noisy picture box is so fucking funny#theyre obsessed with each other your honor#hazbin art#hazbin hotel#hazbin hotel fanart#alastor#hazbin alastor#vox#hazbin vox#radiostatic#i fell for the fucking tv#my art
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had a fucking hilarious dream that tumblr replaced the "block" function with the far funnier "glock" function, which did the exact same thing except whenever anyone blocked you a random bullet hole, like a png of a bullet hole, would appear on your blog. discourse blogs were unreadable bc you'd go to the page and the sheer amount of bullet hole pngs stacked over the blogs obscured everything. I woke myself up laughing
#normally I don't chronicle my dreams here but fucking hell that one was funny#I think this would genuinely make tumblr better tbh#@ staff do this cowards#spy has thoughts#my life is a sitcom and i am my own laugh track#functional website#spy's smash hits#Glock function#edit for everyone in the notes saying 'everyone clapped'#I know I can't prove to you that it happened for real you're just gonna have to trust me on this#but I swear on my goddamn life I'm not making this up#I make so many conscious puns that sometimes my subconscious cooks up a real good one
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get panini pressed, idiot
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the pjo fandom on tumblr vs tiktok is so funny cause we've all (or most of us) have already read the entire series, we know what's going to happen so we can see the parallels and the tragedy behind it but on tiktok???
they're in love with Luke
they think he's so kind and nice and its wonderful he's percy's friend, there's no way that he'd be evil - I've seen theories that annabeth is going to be the one who betrays percy (prior to ep4)
the tonal shift is insane and I can't wait to see all these first time viewers lose their fucking minds
#rosi shitposts#percy jackson#percy jackson spoilers#percy jackon and the olympians#luke castellan#annabeth chase#percy jackson tv show#pjo series#pjo tv show#its so funny you dont understand#everyone whos read the series is fucking with everyone else in the comments#pjo fandom
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Vincent Price guest stars on The Muppet Show (1977)
#vincent price#the muppets#kermit#kermit the frog#the muppet show#muppets#funny#vampire#fun#halloween#spooky sexy man#hes so sexy#i just adore this sexy dilf Bisexual#bicon#bisexual icon#i want to bite him...not on his neck either...ahem#so sexy#fuck#horror#old horror movies#vintage#movie#actor#handsome#gif#gifs made by me#gif set#my gifs
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stupid thing i did
#art stuff#digital art#doodles#digital aritst#dipper pines#mable pines#gravity falls#bill cipher#billford#gravity falls fanart#i thought this’d be funny#IM SO TIREDDDD#i can finally nap again#lightning mcqueen fucked my mom#bill cipher fucked my grunkle ford#squidflavoredsoup
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that half-blank, half-apocalyptic look
"i can b ur angle or yuor devil" etc etc "get a man who can do both" etc etc
obsessed with this vamp i think he should get to do whatever he wants forever
#my art#interview with the vampire#iwtv#amc iwtv#armand#armand iwtv#scopophobia cw#in s1 the look on 'rashid''s face when daniel asks where hes from is so carefully and calculatedly innocent i like it a lot#then ofc in 2x05 the actor for armand enters what is medically referred to as sicko mode#whats his name actually hold on#assad zaman#goood stuff#what can i say this show is candy for my brain#v funny how armand was literally Just A Guy in the first season but season 2..... holy fuck#i want 100 more episodes of this freak#yes he did all that and i stand with my cancelled wife
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