#that the other friend mentioned

[turmeric-lover]

Mmm. Of the friends I feel I'm losing touch with because of moving away from each other there's one I'm particularly hung up on, one with whom keeping connected is especially hard even when you see them everyday, one I had episodes of being quite close with. One which is so dumbly into another person from the friend group that they put all their staying-close efforts into that one relationship, leaving none for me!!!!!!

Accompanying the two doing something is like third-wheeling a couple, fine, but in group activities one, too, can see that all that me (and another friend living closer to me) are missing out on in reports and updates from their life goes all to that one friend that's an object of unspoken but clear to all, except the recipient (who has a partner btw) admiration.

Fuck all of this...........

[shadowtraveled]

"mithrun is the only real monsterfucker in dungeon meshi" is objectively the funniest bit you can get out of his everything, but in all seriousness i think his attraction to his love interest is deliberately overstated—and that makes sense, because romantic jealousy is a classic and digestible motive, which is explicitly what kabru was aiming for in condensing mithrun's backstory, and also because until chapter 94, mithrun wasn't willing to admit to the true nature of his desires.

but because romantic envy is both classic and digestible, it probably isn’t a unique enough or complicated enough desire to tempt a demon’s appetite. mithrun’s wish, as far as we can figure from kabru’s reduced retelling, was to have a life in which he had never become one of the canaries, and that carries like 3857 implications and desires within it. that’s delicious. his love interest acts as sort of a red herring to his motivation for making it, though. (side note: i'm saying "love interest" here because, keeping in mind that i barely speak japanese on a good day anymore, "想い人" is something i'd usually take as just kind of an old-fashioned and romantic way to refer to a lover, but in context i wonder if both the connotation of yearning and the vagueness are intentional, and i think this phrasing gets those aspects of it more effectively. anyway.)

mithrun considered his love interest to be untrustworthy. there was a minute where i thought that comment might be about a similar-looking elf (yugin, one of his squad members), but comparing the two…

the "sketchy" arrow is definitely referring to the elf we know as his love interest—the bangs go toward her right, she only has the one forehead ornament, and, most notably, her ears aren't notched.

every time she’s given a full-body depiction in his dungeon, she’s drawn as a chimera, with the body of a snake from the waist down. (side note: the “what if a dungeon has chimeras before reaching level 4?”/“then the dungeon lord is unstable” exchange just being mithrun grilling his past self alive is so funny. he’s so. but anyway) there are a couple things about this.

first, the snake part of the chimera appears to be modeled after some species of coral snake mimic

which, in the biology-for-fun manga, i… doubt is a coincidence, especially with the added context of the “untrustworthy” comment. the dungeon’s conjured illusion of mithrun’s love interest was a harmless copycat of a venomous original. for whatever reason, he felt this person was a threat and made up a "safe" version of her to be in a relationship with, and while it’s definitely possible to be attracted to or even love someone you find to be toxic and/or intimidating, when you take that into consideration alongside the configuration of her body, you get some interesting implications.

which brings us to our second point: if we assume that mithrun was not in fact fucking a snake, then sexual attraction, at least, was so far removed from his idea of a relationship with this person that he did not even bother to keep her dungeon copy human enough to maintain the illusion of the option of a sexual relationship. this is somewhat echoed in the depictions of their interactions, which also imply a frankly unexpected romantic distance. she kisses his cheek and he doesn't seem to react; she's at the edge of a narrow bed with only one set of pillows, on top of his blankets while he's underneath them.

the kiss is particularly interesting because it seems to contrast the text. kabru's narration tells us this was everything mithrun could have asked for, but mithrun is there looking unreadable to pensive, likely because this is right before the panel that makes it clear things in the dungeon are beginning to go wrong.

walking through this backwards for a minute, we have the physical barrier of his bedding and the spatial separation inherent in a bed made for one person, the emotional barrier of his mounting anxiety getting in the way of his ability to enjoy the affection he sought, and... the snake, which historically carries the connotation of temptation, yes, but also mistrust, barring physical intimacy. okay. ok. if a dungeon reflects the mentality of its lord, all of this might suggest that mithrun was not able to have any real desire for a relationship with this person. his unwillingness to be vulnerable or let another person in was insurmountable. but in that case, why was she such a focal point that she remained to the end, after his dungeon had stopped creating iterations of his friends to come and visit him? why would he get so upset over her meeting with his brother that he became lord of a dungeon about it?

well. mithrun's brother was also interested in her, probably genuinely. and mithrun had to win.

you have an older brother who your parents completely ignore, probably in part because he is chronically ill/disabled and almost definitely in part because he received a ton of recessive traits that resulted in rumors that he was an illegitimate child. you are aware, most likely because those same parents fucking told you, that you actually are an illegitimate child. but they keep you around because you had the good fortune of looking just like your mother. what can that possibly teach you but that you, like your brother, are disposable?

it's utterly unsurprising that mithrun, under these circumstances, developed a pathological need to be better than everyone around him. people don't keep you otherwise. i'd argue this is also why he says he looked down on everyone he knew while milsiril claims his dungeon reeked of feelings of inferiority—he sought out people's worst traits and prioritized them in his mind to protect his already extremely fragile sense of self-worth, and all the while he tried to be as likable and high-performing as he possibly could be. his parents disposed of him anyway, but even then he tried to keep up the performance. he was kind to everyone. he never once lost to a dungeon.

when he saw his "love interest" meeting up with his brother, what he saw was himself being replaced by a person his parents had always treated as worthless, and if that was what they thought of the child they'd kept, what value could anyone possibly see in the bastard they'd given away to die? mithrun and kabru tell the story like he wanted to win this unnamed elf's heart, but it was never about being with her. it was about cementing his worth, proving that he didn't deserve to be thrown away.

and so it's particularly cruel that his demon discarded him, too. but maybe it's also particularly gentle that, in the end, there was someone who refused to even consider giving up on him.

kui laid it out in three panels better than i could hope to.

yeah. it's love. you wanted to be loved, even when the only way you were able to understand it was through the desire to be wanted, and you wanted that so badly that the idea of being consumed felt like the promise of finally mattering to someone.

[chloesimaginationthings]

The real reason Michael has a British accent in FNAF…

[cherrywhite]

every single time (template from @mhuyo)

[real-skel]

I know I draw them being gay and playing tongue guitar all the time but let’s be real they were not always like that

[merverelli]

"you just feel yourself let go."

still thinking about this episode. man. 💪💥

[dykedvonte]

Curly's little blurb on his steam trading card just keeps reminding me he is a much more miserable person than people realize.

We don't get a lot of his thoughts, inner confliction that aren't bogged down by what Jimmy says or does. Even in the The Last One and Then Another, his dialogue is reflective, not the Curly before the crash but the result of everything. Parts of the him he was are there of course, but also disfigured and warped beyond recognition just like he is physically.

Curly really doesn't think much of himself and desires. He clearly chases fleeting moments of happiness. He doesn't really have prospects for himself, assumes in a similar way to Swansea, that if it should make it happy then he is happy. Though, he hasn't reached the point Swansea did to admit it doesn't. He neither sees the glass half full or empty, it's just water, something he needs and he'll take it from any perspective.

He wasn't running from anything but he's never really been going towards something either. He's listless. I've been using the term complacent to describe how he feels about his life and the closest people (really just Jimmy) in it, but now that word feels too neutral, too nice. Happier than Curly really was. There isn't just one word for it, he's unfulfilled, uncertain, uninspired. There are no active problems he faces and that's the issue, why should he be upset?

I believe he really is a person who doesn't know who he is or wants to be. He follows a structure. I don't think he's suicidal, but he clearly doesn't think about what makes him happy. He's numb. I suppose that is a better word than complacent, used to the feeling even if he hates it. It doesn't hurt so why stop it?

[royalarchivist]

Fit: They're just jokes dude, just jokes! We're just having a laugh!

Sneeg: Yeah, it's a joke. A weirdly repetitive joke for you, Fit. 🤨🏳️‍🌈

Fit: [Laughs] Wait, what? That's the first time I've ever made that joke, I don't know what you're talking about.

Sneeg: Oh, your first gay joke ever? That's crazy.

Fit: Yeah, I would NEVER joke about something like that!

Sneeg: Oh, so it's serious then? 🤨

Fit: [Stammers] Whoa whoa whoa whoa whoa whoa whoa– That's a whole other sentence there man, I don't know what– take it easy!

Sneeg: Well I'm just saying, if they're not jokes, then what are they?

Fit: You're giving me a rope- you're giving me a rope and I'm hanging myself with it, I just need to stop talking. 💀

—

Sneeg: Like, every single place I go, I just find another space that's extremely open, this is wild dude.

Fit: Sounds pretty big. It's so big!

Sneeg: Alright dude, put it down. 😒 Down boy. That's crazy.

Fit: Take it easy, take it easy! They're just jokes dude, just jokes! We're just having a laugh!

Sneeg: Yeah, it's a joke. A weirdly repetitive joke for you, Fit. 🤨

Fit: [Laughs] Wait, what? That's the first time I've ever made that joke, I don't know what you're talking about.

Sneeg: Oh, your first gay joke ever? That's crazy.

Fit: Yeah, I would- I would NEVER joke about something like that! Yeah, never would I joke.

Sneeg: Oh, so it's serious then? 🤨

Fit: [Stammers] Whoa whoa whoa whoa whoa whoa whoa– That's a whole other sentence there man, I don't know what– take it easy!

Sneeg: Well I'm just saying, if they're not jokes, then what are they?

Fit: You what, I– [Laughs]

Sneeg: Well, answer the question, man!

Fit: You're giving me a rope- you're giving me a rope and I'm hanging myself with it, I just need to stop talking. [Laughs]

Sneeg: [Laughs]

Fit: And now I'm in a fcking hole. Oh god, this is–

Sneeg: Absolutely trapped you, that's crazy. [Laughs]

Fit: Yeah, I'm stunlocked right now, I can't do sht.

[bigfatbreak]

Birds of a Feather previous / next tw: anxiety attack

[diddlesnap]

my haymitch super edition prediction is that theres a weird and unnecessary romantic tension between haymitch and katniss's mom

[twinstxrs]

this is such a simple but good bad kids friendship moment to me. fabian being the first one to say hi to gorgug when he shows up in the middle of the investigation, followed by fig. gorgug saying hi but communicating that he doesn’t want to talk & them both not understanding but going “okay.” gorgug saying hi to riz as a form of acknowledgement even though he’s in full blown investigative mode & probably hasn’t realized gorgug is there yet. gorgug feeling comfortable enough to just put on his headphones & unwind while sitting there with his friends. they’ve come so far from freshman year ❤️

[freyadragonlord]

How do I explain how married Han Yoojin and Sung Hyunje are in the post-epilogue Side Stories without sounding like I am exaggerating or making things up...

[onlyymirknows]

“Reiner doesn’t talk about Bertholdt once in s4”

First off, wrong. (Let’s put a pin in this.)

Secondly, who exactly does Reiner have to talk to about Bertholdt after his death?

The people who last knew him as an 11 year old, such as Porco and Colt?

The people who are too young to even remember him, like Gabi and Falco?

Zeke and Pieck, the people who left him for dead?

Anyone else in Marley who can’t know how he and Reiner changed their minds about the island devils?

The Scouts who killed him after he wiped out dozens of their comrades?

Reiner can’t meaningfully talk to some of these people about Bertholdt because they don’t know the person Bert grew up into. For the people who do know the “real” Bert, there’s a lot of baggage related to the Battle for Shiganshina to work through, first.

Know who Reiner can talk to, though? The one person he does talk to meaningfully about Bertholdt?

Annie! The one time Reiner mentions Bertholdt in s4 outside of a namedrop is to Annie.

And it’s to apologize and express his regret over being the reason Annie and Bert never got to see their fathers again. Yes it’s a short conversation but it’s very clear that Reiner didn’t just forget his best friend. The fact that people claim Reiner doesn’t care about Bertholdt is ludicrous.

Look at his face and tell me he doesn’t care!

For the folks who’ve only watched the anime, in the manga Reiner’s nightmare features Levi, Mikasa, and the image of Eren cutting Bertholdt out of his titan. The anime cut this detail out, I believe for scene transition purposes.

In conclusion, Reiner’s silence isn’t an indication that he doesn’t care. Also, I mean, this is Reiner. He cares deeply about the people in his life, even people who don’t deserve it *coughkarinacough*

[alienssstufff]

Desperate to know which Hermit was patient 0 in getting everyone to watch Arcane. Cuz knowing like half the server play League it,,, literally could be anyone

[swiftiephobe]

note that by "okay" i don't mean with no hint of awkwardness at all, just that you'd be able to sit down and watch with your parents and then not have it be a big deal that you're all watching it.

feel free to put in the tags how old you are + where you're from + please rb for sample size 🫶

[inkskinned]

it is all chaos and entropy. the thing is that the chaos and entropy make it beautiful and lovely.

yes, it's true that nature and the universe are uncaring and unspecific, and that is terrifying. i have lived through some of the unfairness - i got born like this, with my body caving into itself, with this ironic love of dance when i sometimes can't stand up for longer than 15 minutes. i am a poet with hands that are slowly shutting down - i can't hold a pen some days. recently i found a dead bird on our front porch. she had no visible injuries. she had just died, the way things die sometimes.

it is also true that nature and the universe are uncaring and unspecific, and that is wonderful. the sheer happenstance that makes rain turn into a rainbow. the impossible coincidence of finding your best friend. i have made so many mistakes and i have let myself down and i have harmed other people by accident. nature moves anyway. on the worst day of my life she delivers me an orange juice sunset, as if she is saying try again tomorrow.

how vast and unknowing the universe! how small we are! isn't that lovely. the universe has given us flowers and harp strings and the shape of clouds. how massive our lives are in comparison to a grasshopper. the world so bright, still undiscovered. even after 30 years of being on this earth, i learned about a new type of animal today: the dhole.

chance echoing in my life like a harmony between two people talking. do you think you and i, living in different worlds but connected through the internet - do you think we've ever seen the same butterfly? they migrate thousands of miles. it's possible, right?

how beautiful the ways we fill the vastness of space. i love that when large amounts of people are applauding in a room, they all start clapping at the same time. i love that the ocean reminds us of our mother's heartbeat. i love that out of all the colors, chlorophyll chose green. i love the coincidences. i love the places where science says i don't know, but it just happens.

"the universe doesn't care about you!" oh, i know. that's okay. i care about the universe. i will put my big stupid heart out into it and watch the universe feast on it. it is not painful. it is strange - the more love you pour into the unfeeling world, the more it feels the world loves you in return. i know it's confirmation bias. i think i'm okay if my proof of kindness is just my own body and my own spirit.

i buried the bird from our porch deep in the woods. that same day, an old friend reaches out to me and says i miss you. wherever you go, no matter how bad it gets - you try to do good.