#that shit was terrifying i loved that shit so much

[apatheticsunday]

Batfam Eldritch Horror

AKA "inspired by that one post about Danny being a flerken and living with the Batfam" idea! Except he looks pants-shitting, "oh dear god, what is that" terrifying.

I just love slightly feral animal-like Danny in a... shape. It's not immediately identifiable as a cat or dog, maybe he has a few too many legs that kind of look like a tail at one point? And when he skitters up walls like a particularly small dog-sized tarantula, it's terrifying enough to make seasoned criminals squeal.

Let's imagine Danny had some sort of accident with a portal and was Wizard-of-Oz'd into Gotham, a literal hellmouth of a city with so many curses that it'd make John Constantine start to sweat. And this city also has... weird Ecto. (In my brain, there's a connection between the Lazarus Pit and ectoplasm, like pit waters are the sewers of ectoplasm or something.) It's enough for Danny to still exist but he can't seem to stay human-shaped. It's better than being a Blob Ghost, but not by much. His fur-scales-feathers-skin-something look dark as the midnight sky.

And who should stumble on this weird-looking Thing aside from Damian, secret animal-whisperer and passionate Pokemon collector? Damian, who known what a scared feral animal looks like and who can coax it into his arms? It doesn't matter that Danny has maybe five or six limbs. He can make himself slightly smaller at will (not in a Magical-Girl-Transformation way, mind you. When he changes shape, there's the distinct snap of bones breaking and wet, fleshy sounds of his organs, muscles, ligaments, tendons, everything shifting).

Damian has literally been trained by the League of Assassins under the Demon Head. He's likely seen more people's insides than an ER surgeon; he's killed more than enough people in incredibly grotesque and violent ways to be totally unphased by Danny changing shapes. Maybe he'll actually be sort of touched, a bit pleased, that his new Thing pet would change itself so violently so Damian could hold it.

What would Damian name it? He's outwardly violent and aggressive towards others, but pretty passionate and heartfelt once he cares for someone. Alfred the Cat comes to mind. So maybe Damian takes one look at this supposedly scary Thing and thinks, "It looks like Father."

As in, Dark as Night? A shadow inspiring fear amongst criminals? Spoken about in whispers, sometimes laughed off as a joke but still cautiously reverent, just in case?

Danny's new name is Batman.

Of course, this causes some confusion when Damian comes home to Wayne Manor and says, "Batman and I will retire to my room." In front of Bruce, who naturally and kind-of-correctly assumes his son picked up another animal while on patrol. Bruce had a hard time explaining this to a very concerned Dick, who was holding up a wooden stake and a bible (Dick totally wasn't going to kill Bruce if he turned out to be a vampire but it's always good to be prepared!), after Damian apparently made a wayward comment that "Batman refuses to eat anything besides raw meat."

And Danny is having a great time!! Sure, Damian treats him like a pet, but he gets affectionate pats on the head, incredibly expensive steak, and a soft place to sleep. He awkwardly dragged several blankets from the living room to Damian's room to make a bed in the kid's closet. (Alfred watched from behind the couch as this six-legged hairy-ish catlike Thing determinedly waddled with three blankets in its mouth, occasionally tripping on its own legs. He went back to dusting the crown moulding silently. So, that's why Master Damian requested uncooked sirloin steak twelve times in last few days. Hm.)

So, the Batfam accept there is another Batman in the family. Except they haven't actually seen Danny (aside from Alfred and Damian).

Until Dick needs to talk to Damian and goes into the boy's room. But it's empty?? He could've sworn he heard somebody talking or something in here, but maybe not? He turns to leave and then hears it again: a soft kind of thump coming from Damian's armoire. A shit-eating grin spreads across his face as his Older Brother Instincts kick in. Jason used to hide in closets and try to scare Dick when he was little; Damian, despite being a child soldier and trained assassin, was still a little kid at heart, right? The kid's clearly hiding from Dick to scare him or something.

(Damian was in the Batcave, studiously typing "Google, what non-Earth animals reside in Gotham, please?" into the Batcomputer. I like to think that Damian uses the internet like a 85-year old man who thinks a Google employee personally replies to each question.)

So, Dick creeps forward and abruptly slams open the armoire doors!! Only to let out an unholy shriek of terror as Danny, who was taking a nap, frantically skitters out of the closet looking like a Frankenstein cat-dog with bat wings. He crawls under Damian's bed as Dick scrambles into the hallway.

The cat-dog-Thing is out of the bag now. Damian looks utterly deadpan as he explains that Batman is his pet and not to concern themselves with it; Bruce, Tim, Jason, and a white-faced Dick disagreed. They need to see it to make sure the Thing won't harm anybody, especially considering it's fucking living with them!! How do they know it won't try to eat them in their sleep??

"Batman does not eat raw human meat, Todd. Why are you concerned now? It has resided with us for two months now."

"Two months?" Dick nearly faints (again).

"Yes, Batman is very well-behaved, Master Dick." Alfred, who's been feeding Danny for the last two months and has seen all the little quirks the Thing has, offers a consoling half-smile.

Ultimately, the Batfam decide to keep Batman in exchange for scary dog privileges. They'll have to think of another name for Danny considering having two Batmans in Gotham would be pretty confusing (especially if one of them decided they did, in fact, like raw human flesh).

[nyxtickled]

Hey. I read your post about socal.

I have nothing more to say other than I'm proud to see you standing strong to that type of behavior and informing the community.

I, admittedly, grinned hard when you mentioned how he'll never have access to you again while on the plane with him. You are radiant, strong, and badass.

Keep being great, and I know everyone with some sense will stand with ya.

thank you so much friend 🥺💖 ya know, your third paragraph makes me realize there’s probably a lot of people who would love to have seen me say what really deserved to be said. so just for closure, below the cut is the last text i ever sent him :)

“you will never have access to me ever again.

and you should really know that i didn’t seek ANYONE out, although it’s useless to tell you that because you will say whatever you please. you did this to yourself. i provided nothing but honesty and receipts when i was approached. i made new friends, and you happened to tell a different story to every single one of them including myself. you’re pathological. i don’t know why anyone would do what you do or say what you say. it’s genuinely fucking terrifying.

all i wanted was to have all ties cut with you. finding out that you’ve compulsively created scenarios about all the women you were involved with, and for NO reason at all, while dragging each one along for a different motive and keeping each one under a different impression of how the other one felt? absolute fucking insanity.

you need to stop while you still can honestly. because everyone fucking knows that you’ve bullshitted every single one of us. T and Adi know that i have never once been jealous, vengeful, malicious, or insecure whatsoever about them. i now know that T was never trying to session with you due to being “jealous” over our tumblr videos. i also now know that it was you who pursued her for sessions time and time again. absolutely shameful that you’d describe her the way you did when she WAS always so sweet. you had me thinking she was some jealous competitive lee and she never once even cared what the fuck we were posting. oh, and Adi didn’t either, surprise surprise!

the mysterious event you supposedly played hooky from with T, to session with me at the casino? the reason why you asked me not to post content saying we played the previous night? insane behavior. there was never any fucking event. that’s LUNACY. oh, and you think i’m enjoying my “revenge tour,” yeah? just like you said about [lee 1]? just like you said about [lee 2]? what a magnificent phenomenon that everyone who ever finds you out for the narrative-twisting fantasy fiction author that you are is actually just being *vengeful* and trying to *ruin what means most to you.* you don’t see the common denominator here? you think WE wouldn’t see it?! are you really that vapid? you couldn’t be. i really didn’t think so.

aaaand yet, here you are. reading text messages from me out loud to Adi while you try to control the narrative there too, but leaving out the part where i wrote what you didn’t want to admit to. telling me whatever you thought i’d want to hear to keep me around for fucking tumblr views and fake vetting purposes, knowing damn well you don’t possess a FRACTION of the emotional responsibility that is actually required in a D/s dynamic with a “primary lee” that you offered me. a dynamic i didn’t even ask for by the fucking way. smoke and fuckin mirrors and too coward to just admit that you’re simply not interested. or is it because you actually just don’t have what it takes and that’s what you’re too afraid to admit?

this shit is fucking sociopathy and that barely scratches the surface. you will NEVER have access to me again and i don’t give a fuck what you say to anyone about me because i have nothing to hide. the truth is very easy to remember. i never have to defend myself to anyone. you know why? because i don’t lie, manipulate or coalesce for the sake of nothing more than my embarrassingly fragile ego. you fucked this up, not me.”

[cherry-holmes]

Glimpse of a life with Javier Peña

Chapter 16 (pt. 2)

MAIN MASTERLIST

Summary: You have many questions. And Javier is terrified about what your reaction could be.

SERIES MASTERLIST

Previous chapter

Pairing: Javier Peña x f!reader

Word count: +1.9k

Warnings: mmm none, i guess

A/N: PLEASE FORGIVE ME FOR TAKE ME SO LONG😭 I was having some struggles in my life, I’m better now if you want to know😁

•••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

"Why didn't you tell me about her?"

You asked as soon as you stepped back into the hotel room where Javi was staying. You were curious about the mysterious woman who had almost become his wife, but you didn't want to make a scene. You'd never been the jealous type, unless you had real reasons to be. So you held back, not wanting to accuse him without hearing what he had to say first. It was a very personal part of his life, something that probably hurt him at the time... or maybe still did. But you couldn't ignore the sting in your chest, the need to know what on earth happened between them.

"Because it's something I'm not proud of," he answered honestly, his voice tinged with anguish, afraid of how you'd react. He didn't want to lose you again, so he knew he had to choose his words carefully and be completely open, so you could see he wasn't that man anymore.

"Is it because you regret not marrying her?" you asked, your voice almost a whisper. You didn't know exactly what you expected to him to say. If he did regret it, it would be heartbreaking. But if he didn't, then perhaps it shouldn't matter to you. Or should it?

"Absolutely not," he replied quickly, stepping closer and taking your soft hands between his, gently caressing them.

Then, he told you the whole story: He was very young when he met Lorraine. They dated for a few months, and then she was the one who popped the big question. She always wanted to marry young, and she thought Javi was the one. So he said yes because it seemed like the reasonable next step for a man his age, trying to live up to his family's expectations. But deep down, he knew that wasn't what he wanted. So he left her at the altar.

He continued, "I realized I didn't love Lorraine. I didn't want to marry her. I wanted to do something beyond the police trainee I was doing in Laredo. I wanted to make a difference in the world."

You listened attentively, trying to picture a very young Javi, already preparing for marriage. You kind of understood him. You were also a young girl trying to find your place in the world, feeling the pressure of expectations to marry as soon as possible and start a family. And just as him, you felt the need to knew the world first, to be independent and proud of yourself before tie the knot.

"Marrying her probably would have saved me a lot of shit in Colombia because I probably wouldn't have gone," he admitted, his gaze meeting yours. "But then I never would have met you. So, I'm very grateful I didn't. I would go through all that hell again a million times just to be with you. Just to follow you wherever you want to go. You've brought so much light and happiness into my life, bonita. More than I ever thought I could deserve. Te amo. And I'm sure I want to be with you forever. I do want to marry you, mi cielo."

He couldn't shake the feeling that he had disappointed you. Again. And again. And again. And that there wasn't a single word he could say to repair the damage. Every time you placed your blind trust in him, every time everything seemed to be going smoothly, he messed something up.

Javier had known this for a while, actually. He had even considered not coming for you after Washington. Perhaps you would be better off without him. Javier was a tortured, traumatized man who never seemed to learn his lessons; he had guilt and ghosts chasing him. And yes, you had your own, but he always admired you for being stronger than he would ever be. Resilient, still hopeful in this rotten world.

But he was also selfish. He couldn't even bear the thought of not being with you. The jealousy of you not being with him. His. The mere idea of spending the rest of his days without the touch of your soft skin and the soothing tone of your voice made his heart physically ache. You had power over him, but it doesn't scare him at all. He would do anything for you. Whatever it took to keep you safe, warm, and happy.

And you were well aware of that. You could feel his care and protection over you, like an invisible warm cloak on your shoulders. You trusted him with blind faith despite everything.

Your silence was killing him. He would be on his knees if needed, begging you not to leave him, pleading for you to believe in his love. Javier Peña would do anything you asked, absolutely anything, in exchange for your forgiveness.

"Please, baby," he begged, desperation lacing his tone. "Say something..."

After another second that felt like an eternity for Javi, you opened your beautiful lips and murmured, "It's okay."

But there was something in your tone that didn't convince him. He still felt a weight on his chest. You weren't looking at him; instead, you kept staring at your hands.

"Bonita..." Javi's voice was soft, filled with concern as he leaned in closer, searching your face, his heart pounding with anxiety. But before he could say anything more, you sighed deeply, your expression softening.

"You're nine years older than me," you began, your voice calm but carrying a weight of something he couldn't name. "You've experienced more things than I have. How could I blame you for anything that happened before us?" You reached out, gently resting your hand on his cheek, feeling the warmth of his skin under your fingertips. "It's part of how things are in a age-gap relationship. I get that."

His breath hitched slightly at your words, relief washing over him, but there was still a flicker of doubt in his eyes. "There's a but, isn't it?"

His voice was tentative, as if he was afraid of the answer.

You hesitated for a moment, biting your lower lip. "It doesn't mean it don't make me feel... well, jealous," you admitted, your voice barely above a whisper. "A little." You offered him a small, almost shy smile.

He reached out, his hand gently cupping the back of your neck, pulling you closer. His thumb traced your jawline, sending shivers down your spine as he gazed at you with tenderness.

"You have no reason to be jealous," he murmured, his voice low and intimate, making your heart race. His thumb caressed your bottom lip, his gaze locked on yours, and you could feel the heat rising between you. "I'm yours," he whispered against your lips. "There's no part of me that doesn't belong to you. My body and soul are only yours."

You leaned into his touch, your breath catching as his fingers slid through your hair, his hand resting on the nape of your neck, pulling you toward his lips. There has always been something electrifying in the way he kissed you, the way he touched you, as if he couldn't get enough of you. It was gentle yet possessive and devoted at the same time.

But before anything more could happen, he pulled back. You felt a cold breeze where his warmth had been, suddenly craving his touch and the promise of something more. But before you could even process what was happening, he moved swiftly toward his suitcase, rummaging through it. Your heart skipped a beat when he turned back to you again, holding a small black velvet box. His hands trembled as he opened it to reveal a stunning vintage diamond engagement ring.

"You mean everything to me," Javi said, his voice thick with emotion. "I don't know if I'll ever be worthy of you, but God knows how badly I want it to be." His voice cracked, and you felt a surge of emotion, tears welling in your eyes as you looked at him. Damn, how much you loved that man.

"This ring belonged to my mother," he continued, his gaze never leaving yours. "I brought it with me from Laredo. I was planning to propose to you the way you deserve, but... fuck, I need you to know how serious I am. Marrying you isn't something I just came up with. It's something I've wanted for a long, long time." His voice softened as he dropped to one knee. "So, bonita, will you accept me? With my flaws and my past? With all the love and devotion I have for you, will you marry me?"

Tears streamed down your cheeks as you saw his frame kneel in front of you. You couldn't stop the flood of emotions, thinking about everything that happened back in Colombia, everything that happened just hours ago with your family. Everything that had happened in your life since you was just a little girl desperately longing for the loving arms of her parents, arms they never truly offered. You cried for the lack of love in your life.

Yes, you had love from your sisters and your grandparents, but it never quite filled the void your parents had left behind. You had omitted the worst parts to Javi when you talk about your parents. It wasn't just verbal abuse: your mother was physically violent, and when your father drank, he would make inappropriate comments about your and your sisters' bodies. It made you feel ashamed and vulnerable. You didn't want him to think of you like that.

So you cried, testifying his love, because you never felt you were worthy of devotion, and love. If your parents couldn't love you, why would others?

He must have seen the sadness in your eyes, the way your beautiful and delicate features shifted from tenderness to something else, quickly turning to melancholy. At first, he feared your response might be a no - even when you said yes at his first proposal -. But he knew you too damn well, he knew there was something more. It was the same expression you had when you remembered something about your parents or your infancy. He never pushed you to share everything about your childhood; all he knew was that it had been difficult for you and your sisters and deeply painful to remember.

Javier didn't had to say anything, not verbally. His hand reached for yours, and just by his gently, warm and confident touch he made a vow: you will never be alone. He would never leave, or hurt you. His life was yours, and yours were his to protect.

Finally, you nodded, accepting his arms as your shield, his heart as a reminder of what you deserved. You dropped to your knees in front of him, your hands shaking as you whispered, "Si," your voice breaking.

Javi's breath hitched as he slid the ring onto your finger, his hands trembling slightly, and both of you admire the ring on you finger. He'd never saw a more beautiful image. He pulled you close, his arms wrapped around your waist, pulling you tightly against him, as if he never wanted to let go. You felt his warmth, his love, and in that moment, nothing else mattered.

Your hands tangled in his hair as you pressed yourself against him, wanting to feel every part of him. Javi pulled back just slightly, his forehead resting against yours, both of you breathless. "Te amo," he whispered, his voice hoarse. "Para siempre."

NEXT CHAPTER

[ghostmoon1]

This is literally the first ask I‘m sending anyone on tumblr, but you said you‘re depresso, so here it is in the hopes of making you a little happier :)

I firmly believe every single scary dude has that one guilty pleasure girly song they secretly love and sing in the shower. What do you think that would be for the CoD guys? I can just imagine Ghost going full on White Chicks and belting out A Thousand Miles when he‘s alone in the car.

Ack!! I'm honoured to be the first, and thank you. Thats really sweet and means a lot <3 And thank you, these are helping take my mind off things

Yeah Ghost's guilty pleasure is like California girls, or just the most white chick songs you can find. He will always deny it if someone hears. You heard him singing Hot n Cold? No, you didn't.

Soap well, he listens to white girl music anyway, and everyone knows. Now, people know the music he listens to, and he hums to it sometimes. But when he's alone, he's full out singing that Scottish folk music, he'll bust out bagpipes that no one knew he could use. He sings in the shower all the time. No questions asked.

Price listens to that divorced dad music. Does he sing? Pft no. (He does. He's always singing at home alone, cooking dinner, doing the washing.) And he's also surprisingly good at singing lullabies! He's the man you go to when you're upset and want someone to sing to you.

Gaz. Well, A. He has a nightcore phase. There's one thing: He loves his fair share of white girl music. He's also a die-hard Lady Gaga fan. He has all her merchandise, has been to concerts, and sings every single one of her songs when they're on.

Konig, he listens to some nice german music ofc (shits good). But he enjoys just listening to instrumentals. Not so much singing; he's terrified of someone hearing him while singing. But if he does, he has a lovely voice.

No ones allowed to argue with me here, because we all know its canon. Graves listens to country. If you argue, you gotta lick Shepherd's boot.

[irmakkockan]

THE BOY NEXT WORLD EPISODE 9

This week, Cir has been a little too much.

When he cried and begged Phukan to never push him away, it wasn’t just because he was “gone and just came back” (I don’t think he fully remembers the details of the time purgatory place), but mostly out of guilt. Guilt for knowing that Phukan actually believes in the parallel world bullshit and is trying to send Cir back to his “real” world. Guilt for lying to Phu for years - and (I’m hoping) guilt for being an actual stalker. He knows Phu is trying to push him away and he’s just terrified.

So all that begging didn’t make me feel super emotional - instead, it made me feel a bit uneasy.

And then he just kept smothering Phu throughout the episode. Interrupting a random person just asking for directions, waiting at the class door - he was just always there. Phukan knew something is off, and even though he thought it was just love - well, give it a few months. That shit is suffocating.

Cir, with his constant presence, his relentless worrying about Phu’s “well-being,” is just - Christ. I couldn’t breathe. And I’m only the audience.

Cir is using the danger his mother and fiancée pose as a shield for his guilt. He’s never taking his eyes off Phu, making sure he never lets go of the person he spent years watching from afar. It’s not just love - it’s an overshadowing, overbearing obsession. It’s too much.

Honestly, these boys just need to relax.

About Phu finding out the truth - well, which truth really? Because Cir was actually right. There are parallel worlds. That time purgatory wasn’t just in his mind. The scar disappearing and reappearing is proof.

So I get it - Phu has every right to be angry, hurt, disappointed, to lose all trust in Cir because of the lies. But - BUT.

Phu actually knows there are parallel worlds, right? Is he just going to ignore the scar thing?? Dark Cir showed us the other worlds, and those were real, RIGHT?

SHOULD WE DOUBT THAT PLACE EVEN EXISTED??

Please give me the next episode now.

Or not? I’M NOT READY FOR THIS SERIES TO END - IT’S DRIVING ME MAD AND CONSUMING MY THOUGHTS ALL DAY EVERY DAY.

And I’m just so into Boss that it’s CRAZY.

[midnightshindig]

Single Mama! Reader with Cecil or Donald headcanons, pretty please. I’ll give you my prized Pokémon book for it.

Donald and Cecil x SingleMom!Reader

oh my god i read this as sigma while scrolling through requests and had an aneurysm I'm so fucking brain rotted

anyways- Cecil and Donal are separate hcs, sorry if these are sort of short!

hcs under the cut!

Cecil

Cecil is ambivalent and distant

he's not against you having a kid, but he doesn't know what to do with it

"Want a beer?" "HES FOUR" type shit

For the most part he treats your kid as cordially as possible.

If they're an elementary schooler, he might try and bribe them into liking him with toys

If they're more like a middle or high schooler, however, he treats them with respect

Cecil over her shaking some fourteen year olds hand like "I promise my intentions with your mother are good, I'm a good man and she's a great woman."

like oh my god just stooooop

but they lowkey kind of love it? Like, he's so aloof and weird, your kid(s) adore him

It's a very parallel-play type of thing

Cecil and you will be watching a movie and your kid will come downstairs and sit on the other side of the couch, casually reading a book or playing their 3ds or something

If your kid is interested in government or safety, Cecil will happily take them under his wing

You come back from the bathroom to find Cecil explaining calculus to your high schooler

or explaining the concept of government to your eight year old, who is happily absorbing it all like a sponge

He keeps it age appropriate

Cecil has a LOT of resources

So when he wants to take you out, you've got your pick of the best babysitters in the world

It's usually Donald ngl

sometimes, though, a teenage superhero will volunteer to babysit for some extra cash

So Eve-- or, more accurately-- Rex and Rae-- come over to babysit.

(ignore season three for these purposes- stfu it's cute)

And Cecil takes you out on the town

being a single mom means you have a hard time getting to be just Y/n, not Y/n the mom

Cecil makes sure you know how special you are

Corny ass man probably takes you swing dancing or something

Red Lobster type mf

I'm kidding he takes you to a very nice dinner

and buys an extra dessert for your kid <3

Donald

BIG nerd

Your kid like pokemon? Oh he's studying up rn to impress them

Because of this Donald's at work reading Warrior Cats and Cecil is like "Donald what the fuck is that?"

"Oh- My girlfriend's kid is really into this serious, I want to make a good impression."

"A grown man having warrior cats knowledge is terrifying, Donald."

psshhh whatever Donald doesn't care.

Tries to win over your kid by showing off his robotic features (once he gets used to it himself)

WILL take your kid to the park with you as a date

I hc Donald probably doesn't have too much in the way of his own family, so he's charmed by yours

Donald likes to take your kid(s) with you on dates

Group family dates if you will

So you all go to the movies, or maybe to dinner every now and again, stuff like that

But he makes time for just you don't you worry.

Type of dude to throw your kids in the air.

he's just casually available and emotionally supportive

ALSO teaches your children stuff, but more like history or lower level math

I have the very specific image in my head of your 3rd/4th grader coming home crying because her school is doing a daddy daughter dance and like.... she doesn't have a dad? What is she going to do?

You offer her to bring her uncle, or maybe she could bring you?

Donald comes back from the store with groceries for dinner and your daughter lights up

"I want Donald to take me!"

"Hm?" he puts the bags down to high five your daughter hello "Take you to what, kid?"

You sighed, leaning awkwardly against the kitchen counter "She's having a daddy daughter dance at school- Honey, why don't you take your uncle?"

Donalds eyes widen and he has to hold back a wobbly smile "No it's okay! I'll take her." Oh fuck it, dude is smiling

Ugh i'm a wreck he's so sweet

He's not trying to replace their dad or anything

like literally "not the step dad he's the dad who stepped up"

[antlereed]

why must all horror fall into five categories:

the planet is Going to Die (because of a storm/meteor/ALIENS[???])

there is something in the water (Big Shark)

were a group of besties recording our whacky vacation!!!!!!

what if. there was a man. with a scary waepon. who wants to GET you

ghosts

[krysmcscience]

Don't mind me, just slacking on a big Billford comic by making other far more ridiculous Billford comics and also some AU art (please excuse my slapdash human!Bill thank you please, also before anyone asks the art style is messy and all over the place because idgaf LOL)

This started out as an excuse to design a Bill Cipher-inspired "wedding" dress, but then spiraled wildly out of control. Various rambles and a bunch more human!Bill arts under the cut, including another silly little comic at the end! (Feel free to skip the rambles, I won't be offended. I know I'm bad at shutting up. XD)

I may or may not write some comedy stuff for this AU, which I'm calling 'For Better Or Worse (But Mostly Worse)'. While Ford DOES remember getting sloshed enough for one thing to lead to making out with another after karaoke, neither he nor Bill remember this wedding, At All. The Love God did nothing to dissuade them from going hog wild on their marriage spending, either, so it got...uh. Exorbitantly Expensive. As in, the grand total could probably buy the entire fucking MOON sort of expensive. (It's fine, don't worry, Bill's good enough at crime to be able to afford it.) Also, because the logic of this AU is mostly dictated by Rule of Funny, the Love God's powers are close to unlimited when it comes to matters of romance, but ONLY when it comes to matters of romance. (Like weddings!)

Want an empty human vessel to smash the soul of a triangle into for date nights or when it's convenient, or perhaps even when it's NOT convenient? Easy peasy! Want the marriage to be recognized in every corner of the multiverse from now until the end of time, thus making any potential future divorce nigh-on impossible? Can do! Want to buy an entire beach for the ceremony and honeymoon and in general, and totally not at all because it would be Super Hilarious to prevent any specific movies from being made on that very same beach in the future? Fine, whatever, it's not his finances he's ruining!

Does the Love God also provide special rings that just so happen to turn incorporeal as long as the "happy couple" doesn't remember that they barged into his dreams to bully him into presiding over their marriage? ...No comment!

He spends the next thirty years trying and failing to get in touch with either of them for payment. This is why you should always demand half the money up front, my guy!

Also it's absolutely a traditional Jewish wedding, because I like the idea of Bill demanding all the keepsakes from the marriage that he paid for, and being completely confused when one of the things he's handed is a fancy container full of broken glass. He gets it later, but in the moment, he thinks the Love God is just fucking with him some more.

Ramble over! Here's the full dress that caused the comic to happen, along with what Ford wound up wearing at the wedding (and begrudgingly agreeing to put on again later for Reasons), aaaaand also a close-up of Bill's ring:

I may have forgotten to draw Bill's hair floofier when drawing the back of the dress, lmao

Since double ring ceremonies have been leaking over into Jewish wedding customs for a while now, Ford also has a ring, but his is the much more traditional plain gold band. There's definitely a message engraved on the inside - embarrassing, cringe, or incriminating somehow - but I haven't decided what it is yet, so use your imagination for now. XD Bill, on the other hand, saw the phrase 'traditional plain gold band' and said "No Thank You" before proceeding to embellish his ring to his liking. And because he's a secret sap who adores Ford's extra fingers, the triangle points add up to twelve, as do the engraved stars. Yes, they're stars, not dots, I just got lazy. There's also six lashes on the eye gem, and probably an eye engraving on the inside with another six lashes. (Bill's got it BAD, okay? We all know this.)

Here are the initial scribbles of Bill's custom vessel in more casual attire, please ignore the wonky anatomy and the fact that I flat out refuse to ever draw him with a proper top hat:

He does actually need a cane in this vessel; since Bill tends to possess men and especially Ford more often than not, he's used to having a higher center of gravity when in a human body, so his ability to balance is pretty garbage. (He may or may not topple over with concerning regularity.) As for his empty eye socket, his bangs don't do much to hide it since he's so high-energy (dude is constantly on the move), and he also refuses to wear a patch over it, because 1.) why bother, and 2.) it's more fun to freak people out.

To better align with Ford's attraction towards the strange, the vessel was designed with super minor shapeshifting ability - Bill can look like a perfectly normal human, but he can also make the teeth and fingers sharper whenever he likes (which is mostly just when he's angry or being more of a menace than usual), as well as slit down the pupils or outright ditch the irises altogether. He can also have whatever he wants in the downstairs department, just because I'm an indecisive bitch on that front, lmao. Maybe he can have boobs if he wants them, too, but I ain't drawin' tits on no triangle, nuh-uh, no sir. His powers are otherwise limited down to what humans can do, because for some reason, the Love God doesn't trust Bill to not snap into Immediate Apocalypse Mode if he's given a physical form that's actually all his and no one else's.

Due to the body being all his and no one else's, it's also not really a standard possession so much as it is just...Bill being temporarily human. He's a lot more aware of and in tune with his human body's senses than he ever was with his "puppets", which makes things like pain a lot more intense. (He is mostly fine with this, because he's a fukken masochist.)

A bit more fashion stuff, including beach and party attire~

The beach outfit was mostly me trying and failing to nail down his body shape, which is still not bottom-heavy enough. I then decided to slap a bikini on it, before making it supremely unsexy with a pair of fugly shorts, because Bill's fashion choices are not allowed to be conventionally attractive. Meanwhile, the party outfit was mostly me looking at the casual attire I designed, asking 'how would Bill make this Worse', and then drawing the result. The mismatched thigh-highs are killing me inside! :D

No, his vessel can't actually summon fire, I just drew it for funzies before I decided on said vessel's limitations. Yes, the gold brick tattoos are absolutely a reference to the fic 'Knowing Me, Knowing You' - I simply could not resist.

I also HAD to draw Bill in one of his canonical(?) shirts, just made tank-top'd:

He is absolutely about to over-correct and fall backwards after this. USE YOUR CANE, GOOFBALL!!! (I meant to draw Bill closer to this degree of bottom-heavy in the other images, but. Alas. I am bad at anatomy, LOL)

And, last but not least before More Comic Time, I attempted to draw him closer to Gravity Falls style:

Jury's out on whether or not I succeeded, but - hey. I tried. Now have some Handyman Bill AU, but with my goofy human design, instead:

Hey, it's a 'mystery snack', and the guy wanted A BITE to eat - the joke was right there, guys!!! (Based on this post, because it just screamed BILL CIPHER to me.)

whoops i forgor bills ring and cracks ahaha too late now

I WILL SHUT UP AND STOP RAMBLING NOW K THX BYYYYYE

[ghoulishtomato]

How I feel reading the most inconsequential complaints about the Ghoul School anime

[aeoris4lovers]

i know travis guiding them was 100% travis and not in character as chet bc he didn’t even have the voice going, but i also would like to imagine that chet did exactly that.

i like it generally bc he has moments like that where he drops the chaos when things get serious (i’ll never forget watching him and orym talk about will and realizing that oh god, under all those layers of whatever the fuck is going on with him, he cares so much).

but i really like it in this specific situation too bc i’m pretty sure imogen was the one to step up after his confession and immediately say they weren’t going to leave him, and i can totally see him avoiding the conversation in the moment but then stepping up to guide her and taking it really seriously out of appreciation.

[tirfpikachu]

if peaking libfems is a crime.... i don't want to be right B)

[univemma]

I watched Terrifier 3 last night, and there is ONE thing you can say about Sienna Shaw as a final girl.

She will fucking FIGHT for it good GOD

[so-very-small]

(tw for violence/death in this post; it’s about horror movies but g/t)

im in my Horror Movie era and like. i keep thinking how terrifying would a g/t horror movie be. a tiny protagonist in an oversized world could be so so scary. bugs, animals, unaware humans, even things just like struggling to get consistent meals or finding somewhere genuinely safe enough to rest. you could go psychological thriller about a recently shrunk person struggling to cope. you could have a slasher flick where the slasher is just an unaware giant.

i want Midsommar but it’s a borrower joining a fairy cult. i want Saw where it’s a borrower making traps for humans because they just hate giants. i want Hereditary with the added struggle of a mixed size family dynamic. i want whatever batshit original concepts A24 could do with a g/t dynamic

anyways i think there’s a huge potential for size horror and man. a movie like that would terrify me

[salswisteria]

SPOILERS FOR MALEVOLENT 45

(malevolent bingo bonus as the end)

THIS WAS SUCH A CUTE EPISODE IM SCARED FOR 46 😭

The way Arthur and John are just commuting they're being sweet to each other, they're being nice, they're activity treating eachother with such care ITS SO WIRBKEBDLSBRE

The deep level of care you can hear in their voices as they talk to eachother with so much comfort. Opening up to eachother about themselves, while taking care to make sure that they don't hurt the other with some long dragged out misunderstanding like they used to do so often back in the day.

The level of progress that these two have made within themselves— as well as with eachother— is just so heartwarming to see. The fact that we now fully have confirmation that Arthur has absolutely wanted to kill himself because of what he did to Faroe, and Faroe's spirit being so darn happy that he doesn't feel that way anymore! Faroe has always been with him and she loves her papa just as much as Arthur loves her.

For John, one was that small moment where he said something about camp fires being so "human." to which he and Arthur respond with laugh and agreement. It's such a small but heartwarming moment where you can just hear the character development brimming out of John. I'm personally not able to put it into words but for those who get it, get it.

I'd love to keep expanding on this because even though this episode is so much more melancholy then how our usual malevolent episodes are like, it means so much for our main characters as a whole and as well as their relationship.

This episode shows us that John and Arthur are different now. Their relationship is different now. They are no longer the John and Arthur we knew for so long, and that's wonderful.

But I am unfortunately burnt out but still have work to do so I should save my energy TT

Now IF Harlan and the Patreons decide to ruin this for us— I will absolutely riot in more even kidding— BUT IN ALL HONESTLY....I don't think they will. BUT WHO KNOWS WITH THIS PODCAST ANYMORE.

(also I think the "M" guy was talking about Alexander the owl when he said "He's not what he seems.")

Malevolent bingo card after EP 45

Photo raw:

[braisedhoney]

some tragic love stories be like: if i could bottle the galaxy, i would pour it into a cup so it would be easier for you to drink. do you want them? do you want the stars? or do they suit you better as adornments for your eyes than glitter on your lips?

but they don’t want the stars. they don’t want the galaxy. but how can they not? is that not enough? (it’s too much, that’s the problem. it’s too much.)

[whirling-ghost]

I had top surgery two and a half years ago and I've only gone swimming a couple of times since, always in queer spaces. until this week. turns out all I need is a language barrier and some old men in speedos to feel less self conscious