#that or a rly bad cold
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Guess who probably has Cövid ... Weeee
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"I think this is the most inhuman; and human, that I've ever felt.." MUCH CAN HAPPEN IN A YEAR. IN FIVE YEARS. A DECADE. imagine how much can happen in a century. just ONE (1). How will you grow? what phases do you find? even in 5 years, you will find patterns.
#jrwi fanart#jrwi show#jrwi suckening#jrwi suckening spoilers#jrwi the suckening#arthur bennett#HEY SO THE REALLY FUNNY THING THAT THE CHARACTER DID THAT SEEMED RLY SILLY N GOOFY IN THE MOMENT?#LIKE THE WHIPLASH BETWEEN SERIOUS N SILLY ALMOST PISSED YOU OFF? WHAT IF I FOUND A WAY TO MAKE YOU SAD ABOUT IT#this was meant to be a scribble that would be a bigger part of a bigger page.might leave it on that page.#but still. bc o that i nearly posted it onto my wacky side blog.BUT NAYY I SPENT TOO MUCH TIME N ENERGY N YOU GOTTA SEE IT#ARTHUR BENNETT DRIVES ME CRAZY. I FEEL LIKE ITS ODD FOR HIM TO BE SO TECHNOLOGICALLY OUT OF TOUCH#WHERE HAS HE BEEN. HAS HE BEEN IN WAR? IS THAT WHERE MAGNUS CAME FROM? WHERE WAS HE WHEN HE WAS WITH EDWARDS CREW?#ARTHURRR I HAVE QUESTIONS ARTTHUUURR!! HEY CAN I ALSO ASK; WHAT THE FUCK HAVE YOU BECOME#DO YOU THINK HE HAD ANY IDEA HE WOULD VEER CLOSER AND CLOSER TO THE MONSTER HE DESPISES. ALL BC HE DESERVES IT. OR WATEVER#HE FASCINATES ME SO MUCH. TO LOOK AT THE STONE COLD STOIC FOOL FROM THE START OF THE SHOW#AND TO FIND OUT THAT HE USED TO BE A BAD BOY.. A DELINQUENT... A LIL PRANKSTER.... MY GODDD THATS ADORABLE#I WOULD LOVE TO KNOW MORE.... BUT I DOUBT THE LAST EPISODE IS GONNA ANSWER THOSE QUESTIONS..i love arthur bennett so much....#AS FOR THE ART!! i mostly used the fire alpaca watercolor brush. tbh im not a brush guy. anti aliased default pen tends to be my main game#but LATELY IM SQQQUIRMIN OUT OF AN ARTBLOCK so expirimenting like this is helping#DONT LOOK TOO HARD AT IT!! im still proud tho. colors are fun :3 im also very proud of the backgrounds#I LOVE THE CARTOON THING where the background looks all fancy n painted but the characters are solid colors#what else can i ramble abt. OH YEAH. i looked up the bikes to make sure they were time accurate tehehehe. 1913 to 2012.#almost a century apart!! isnt that neat? ALSO FUUUCK CAN I JUST MAKE A QUICK CONFESSION. DOWN HERE IN MY TAGS.#only the strongest can read my tags anwyay. SO I REALIZED WHY I LOVE ARTHUR SO MUCH. TIME IS A FLAT CIRCLE#while arthur is a Stoic and Cool vampire w a knack for being playful/silly; who alsos been alive fora century thus witnessing HORRORs#THERE HAPPENS TO BE A ROBOT FROM A BAND W A TITANIUM ALLOY SPINAL COLLUMN#WHOS A Stoic and Cool ROBOT w a knack for being playful/silly; who alsos been alive fora century thus witnessing HORRORS#the fuckkkiiinnngggnn The Spine from steam powered giraffe. WHATEVER. i cant escape from my heart. i guess.#i think The Spine and Arthur could be friends. Arthur saw the band perform back when they were the Steam Man Band#EDIT: WOOPS I DIDNT REALIZE THIS WOULD END UP IN THE SPG TAG. HI GUYS DIDNT KNOW U WERE STILL ALIVE SORREE 4 THE CROSS CONTAMINATION
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tis the season !
#the charcuterie board was devoured and ppl rly loved the cookies and the dates r usually popular#and the baked brie too!!!#and then ppl brought their own assortment of treats and drinks as well#i rly enjoyed my blackberry orange drink personally#my gf’s friend does really beautiful pottery and all the food she brought was in her gorgeous homemade pieces#was so fun i love feeding ppl and making things look pretty and festive#my gf did the insane lettering on the drink menu#and decorated so cutely#and then we all went to the halloween event at the amusement park afterwards and it was fun and cold and misty#and i mostly sat outside of haunted houses while they walked thru them haha#i struggle rly rly bad to recover from being startled and sometimes it just. turns into a panic attack even if im not like Scared?? idk#it’s stupid my body just can’t distinguish real danger from fun danger very well#but they had these “’no boo”’ necklaces i could wear so actors would then just interact w me nicely and creepily instead of jumping at me#which was still fun :-)#bummer tho i hate being mentally illlllllll#and rly embarassing bc the necklaces lit up rly bright so it was like i was wearing an im-a-weenie beacon#lolll#also shoutout to my mutual who recognized me while i was waiting for my friends and stopped to say hi LMAO that was crazy#won’t name names so i don’t dox u#but i’ve never been recognized from tumblr before was a very i like your shoelaces moment😭😭😭#top 10 most embarassing things to happen to me ever but thanks for saying hi !!!#personal
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can someone nice (!!) please please please adopt me im begging you im requesting you (huge word vomit and vent in tags, pls dont read if u dont want to!! and if you don't want this stuff on this blog PLS lmk!! i dont wanna make anyone uncomfy! )
#tw vent#yes ik i have a vent blog#but idk why i dont wanna go there#ill prolly delete this in a while + if i vent here (which ill try not to) ill always tag it#but if any of yall aren't fine with it pls do lmk!!! ill stop <3#Anyways.#fucking hell i hate this.#dude#i very specifically told them to hurry the fuck up THEY were the ones making us late#i have told them a hundred times the minimum time i jeed to get ready#i told them this morning too that you guys make us late then put it all on me#nad she went like oh no dear dont worry that wont happen#WELL GUESS WHAT BITCH#and like the lecture and huge ass scolding and then cold shouldet ive been getting from BOTH of them before i left for coachinh#im just tired atp#idk its not even that big a deal this happens everyday#i dont know how to feel#idk if im even rly feeling anything atp#its just that i really fucking hate being here#I wanna get the fuck out#but thing is this makes me feel kinda guilty occasionally#for eg a few days ago i was rly sick and she took care of me kinda#and then that made me feel bad for hating her#but then things like this happen and i cant help it and i feel so conflicted#i dont want to stay here i know that for sure but i feel guilty for it#if i speak im being rude and backtalking#if i dont speak im being rude and ignoring#the fuck am i supposed to do????#she always tells me to 'stay silent and just hear it'#and when i do that she keeps shouting again and again and finally i say smth bc although its extremely fucking dumb of me to open my mouth
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Wonder if a cold shower would help
#normally i go with hot but my neck and upper back (main issues rn) feel. like. warm#maybe theyre inflamed. maybe the cold will help#i dont normally take ibuprofen anymore because it has a rly rare chance of interacting bad with my meds#and sometimes makes my stomach hurt#but maybe that could help too#idkkkk. havent had a pain flare this bad in a while its hard to just want to relax djqhdkqjd#💛
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t*lvas basically saying he'd rather be abused if it means he's learning more is kinda crazy. Chill before you get mora tentacle surprise'd in the mail
#text#the way he mentions the college makes it seem like he gets that mentioned to him so often to the point where it actually makes him mad LOL#why is he so knowledge hungry...🤕 Stop it. this is how u know he has no other interests or friends or anything#just saying that cus n*loth has a bigger chance of ruining his love life by being his first bc t*lvas doesn't rly gaf about alldat atm#but anyways...#t*lvas leave that hideous beast and just hit the books in the college i'm sure there are men there that are Eager to mentor you#very personally.....#t*lvas/mora is so cute though i wunna draw that. i did a year ago but didn't rly like the drawing#mora-sama is looking to wife someone new after murdering his last one in cold blood . altho t*lvas is too wussy for that really -#- but if he's willing to suffer just to be educated aren't they a match#i like him so bad he's so ygly but he's my Bae ... t*lvas date a girl that will keep you around just bc you do her homework for her -#- even tho u have no hobbies outisde of that and aren't very interesting to her as a person
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...
#date went rly well but it was SO rainy and cold lol. he's really#really sweet and we might hang out again and i think he just kind of asked me out on impulse LOL#no red flags etc we have a lot in common; he's lived in washington and in california for a long time so we got to talk about that#hes a dnd nerd and even with a beard he's even better looking in person which was... very intimidating#i was trying REALLY hard not to stare at his hair but it's like 3 feet long and bright red and smooth and beautiful and#also he has huge brown/hazel eyes and a rly nice smile so i really felt like a potato with bad skin rip#i think he was relieved i wanted to have a sort of low-key and chill hangout instead lol and i think we'll hang out again#but unfortunately bc it was more just like chatting and gettign to know each other i didn't get the chance to be like sooooo im asexual#so im still nervous abt that#and he's so sweet that i feel rly bad if that was a huge disappointment for him :(#anyway#that's how my date went who woulda thought stupid old goblin me would go on a first date with a very beautiful ginger wizard boy at age 32#tbd
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I'm still thoroughly enjoying atogai it's just that I have so much to say that I get a few pages then have to make a comment so I made a whole other lb post
what I DO wanna say is that I think I've finally found a romance where knowing that they're going to get together makes their early tense and unfriendly and judgemental interactions incredibly fun to read because you know how it'll be so changed later, or you can imagine. there have been romances I've liked but I usually find that writing trope tiresome and stressful. but I'm almost gleeful reading how critical this guy is of this other guy. haha just you wait. this writing technique finally fucking worked on me
#even in cql it wasn't rly my favorite part of the story#the change was fun but I loved postres so much more so I focus on that#and they were still FRIENDS in cr arc just very briefly lwj was cold to him#these dudes are not friends. they stress each other out bad and are both miserable#cor reads
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I'd wear skirts all day everyday if my thighs didn't chafe so much
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saurrr ... i have the flu. and so i will probably be dropping a few threads / clearing out my inbox so as to take a few things off my plate. clean slate.
#─── ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ * ⠀ ⠀𝐨𝐨𝐜.⠀ ／ ⠀ ramblings.#/ yea ik its not peak cold & flu season .. my immune system . Hates me you see .#/ i've also been feeling rly bad the past FEW days really and it just peaked tonight so i apologize for slowness in the dms ..#it's not reflective of a lack of interest i'm just Suffering . DKGHDFKGHFKH
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i was reading a bit more 2007 interviews tonight and i saw this bit about life debts
I wasn’t implying by that there was any kind of magical bond there. It was more that Dumbldore’s extensive wisdom and knowledge of human nature, he knew as Harry later thinks in book seven, he knew that Pettigrew would react a certain way to having saved his life. … He’s weak, fundamentally weak. Pettigrew is a very weak character.
which i find interesting since even wikia describes it as a magical bond(i know to take the info there with a grain of salt but i know people go there alot as well)
which just makes me think that dumbledore loves speaking in metaphors and tom (undiagnosed) has no fucking clue how to understand it mgmdgmdfg
tom: nothing I have seen in the world has supported your famous pronouncements that love is more powerful than my kind of magic, Dumbledore
dumbledore, obv only to him that he doesnt mean it literally: have u tried looking elsewhere
tom: 😠💢
#hp#rambles#also love how dumbledores so wise and knowledgeable#yet so fucking bad at giving comforting words lmfao#rly makes it obv how hes wise bc he observes in 3rd person#and can come off as cold when he joins the picture
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i’m sick rn and i think this is going to last until my bday this is sooooo rude 💔
#bella.txt#i don’t rly have plans tbh but like.. cmon… u wouldn’t make the birthday girl deal with a disease.. thts just mean..#i suffered enough from bad bday circumstances when i had to spend my 21st recovering from surgery. gimme a break bro#rn i think it’s like a chest cold or smth.. all ik is it sucks and it makes it hard to sleep comfortably T-T
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janiary would be my favorite momth if she didnt objectively suck. as a month. but like thats my bday im a little bday boy january number one forever. but she sucks 2 be in
#and the reasons have changed used 2 be it sucked 2 have a jan bday bc it was cold so u couldnt do like. outdoor activities. and also bc#christmas is close by etc.#but nowadays it sucks bc it doesnt rly snow anymore in january and everythings miserable forever. yk.#also my seasonal depression gets bad in january the whole december janusry thing id when its bad#esp after my granny died (her bday was dec 2nd + she loved christmas + she died on the jan 28th) so i associate the whole zone with her#being dead. yk.sigh. also i usually get indeterminate illness i think#despite all this january number one and january 13th is the best birthday in the world
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tag game ✨️
Kaili said it's time to share our Spotify wrapped guys!!! All the slides we want!!! thank you for the tag @blueside-hobi, hope that you've had a lovely day and I'm sending you the biggest hug 💗🫂
IT'S SO ICONIC that I listened to Ateez and Gidle the most the months I saw them live 😭😭😭 stan amazing performers ✨️
tagging my lovelies to overshare PLS I NEED TO KNOW (no pressure though ily 🫂💗): @kimchokejin, @aprylynn, @hopeinthebox, @raplinenthusiasts, @starlostjimin, @insomtiny, @bts7svt13, @cordiallyfuturedwight, @epiphanytear, @seraphjimin, @chocolatnoir, @ki-limepie. 💗
#tag games#moots 💗#kaili 🌺#sending everyone the biggest hug and hope you're all well and warm <3#(it's rly cold here you can see where my priorities lie)#oh also like a villain is by bad omens!#if you like some rock/metalcore blend then highly recommended <3 their album the death of peace of mind ahhh chef's kiss
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my brain is funny sometimes bc it's very incessant with its whole "ur an evil bad person actually" thing, all the while it daydreams abt hosting creative writing programmes for at risk youth as like the ultimate career goal. like... yeah ok. im the devil. sure. let's go with that.
#im not saying im a saint or anythjng#but the whole wretched sould cold heart eternal darkness thing is pushing it atp#like yeah ok ive said some mean stuff before. ive been a little violent in my early teens. but i rly dont see the point of#characterising myself like this when the evidence doesent match up#(me while consoling a client and genuinely trying to help them any way i can): god im the fucking worst. im a demon spawn. i have no soul#(me while daydreaming abt being a stable role model and helping kids with their dreams): literally no one is as evil as me#like ?????😭😭😭#its time to face the reality that im actually just an averagly complex person who is neither good nor bad#god i forgot... the worst part... i even volunteer#how will i ever keep my cold exterior intact when i do shit like this 😩#personal
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the power i will receive in a matter of days will be astounding. watch out
#i am making this post to ramble. idk if it will actually change anything but i am trying 2 be hopeful .#ive been very. Rough all month thus far both physically and mentally and occasionally both at the same time#i am just hoping tht wat i am getting soon will help me do things bc ive rly had no energy to do anything at alllllll#and i rly dont want to like. Explode i would like to get things done#i have things i owe to people!!! i just dont have the spoons to do it Ever and it piles iup and up in my head#it fucking blows dude i have been stuck in a horrendous loop for like almost 6 months#i just want 2 be normal u know . i am hoping something will change soon#if it does not change in the nesxt few days when my shit arrives i think im like. Done For in general#like if im unable to get anything done in the next few days then i am going to very seriously have to reconsider#literally everything i do online i think. its a bit fucked up#ik it sounds like an exaggeration bu there is noooo way in hell i am Surviving like tihs !!!!!!! slash srs#i wish twitter circles did not die so i cold blow up in there bu back to ye olde norm of tumblr tags will have to do#also it feels less invasive so like. win for me ig. i do miss rambling nonstop in tags#i miss tumblr!! i miss a lot of old stuff. reminiscing for reasons both good and bad. the tumblr stuff is the good side tho#anyways i have been slowly chipping away at writing thigns this month and ik its like. not a lot at all.#but its a lot to *me* and when youre someone whos only capable of doing so mch its like. a big deal#(im writing pmdnd stuff finally getting back into gear nd stuff i have been trying to slowly draw the npcs#that ive made whilst trying to recover in other areas bu rghghrghgrgr i dont ewant to draw#i havent wanted to draw in a long long time blows up)#i shuld. stop typing actually i am rambling too much i jsujt have nowhere to mindlessly ramble anymore technicaly#i dont want to bug my friends w me being unwell all the time DFJKGHDFKGFG#mayne i will try to ccontinue with the npcs. we will see based on if i post again in the next 30 minutes
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