#that last one is really fucking funny to me

[astonmartinii]

day one: when you wish upon a star | lando norris social media au

pairing: lando norris x fem reader

he's been begging max to set him up ... and look who has him in the grid secret santa!

christmas song: my only wish (this year) - britney spears

MASTERLIST | TIP JAR

f1

liked by maxverstappen1, charles_leclerc and 1,209,488 others

tagged: carlossainz55, pierregasly & landonorris

f1: it's that time of the year again... it's secret santa time!

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user1: THE SPEEDOS????

user2: 100% from valterri

user3: what do we have to do to see them on tho ???

user4: HUH?

user3: we're all thinking it??

alexalbon: since you're a blabber mouth @charles_leclerc PLEASE PUT MORE EFFORT INTO YOUR GIFT THIS YEAR

charles_leclerc: my gift was great last year idk what you people are talking about

alexalbon: if i unwrap a calendar i will set horsey on leo

charles_leclerc: @rspca GET HIM

user5: i love with secret santa you can really tell which drivers are actually friends lol

user6: charles... we're looking at you last year

user7: the teaser showed that max got lando ... could be interesting after this season

maxverstappen1: not that i need to ... but i have a plan

user8: really?

maxverstappen1: i have concepts of a plan!

landonorris: please don't like gift wrap like a litter box or something

maxverstappen1: oh i like my cats much more than i like you why would i do that?

maxverstappen1: AHA! I HAVE IT

landonorris: that sounds ominous

carlossainz55: is it something to do with his pathetic crush on a certain someone

landonorris: LALALALALLALALA SHUT THE FUCK UP I DON'T WANT THE WORLD TO KNOW ABOUT THAT MAX PLEASE DON'T I'M SORRY ABOUT AUSTRIA

user9: well now it needs to happen...

user10: whoever came up with the grid secret santa i need to give you a big fat kiss

maxverstappen1: you might not be the only one ....

landonorris: SHUT UP

maxverstappen1: hehehehehee

yourusername

liked by maxverstappen1, landonorris and 14,055 others

yourusername: gift giving is my love language

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user14: okay lando i kinda get you

user15: she's friends with max and looks like that and hasn't been hooked? where is the hope for all of us

maxverstappen1: hideous personality 👍

yourusername: and you're my best friend so what does that say about you?

maxverstappen1: i have zero standards?

yourusername: girl fuck you

user16: i hate bitches that can actually wrap gifts

user17: leave me alone with my crinkled shit held together with a whole roll of tape

landonorris: my love language is words of affirmation :3

yourusername: okay mr praise kink

landonorris: WHAT? NO?

yourusername: whatever you wanna say babygirl

landonorris: oh i ... um - yes!

user18: oh brother this dude stinks

alexalbon: he is even worse in real life

oscarpiastri: but it is just as entertaining

landonorris: i'm glad my low self esteem is so funny for you guys

yourusername: you're amazing lando - don't think badly of yourself :(

landonorris: did you or did you not call me a 'stumpy, entitled british bum' the other day?

yourusername: well that's because you were fighting max and unfortunately we're two trauma bonded cats and he therefore comes first

yourusername: but i still love you!

landonorris: LOVE?

user19: someone check on him?

oscarpiastri: i just found him passed out in his driver's room

georgerussell63: that's becoming blackmail material

landonorris

liked by alexalbon, yourusername and 803,405 others

tagged: maxverstappen1

landonorris: didn't manage to win the championship this time round but i'm hoping max got me something good in the secret santa to say sorry

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user20: thank god this season is ending

user21: i think it would've killed me if this title race went to abu dhabi again

user22: it's pookie on pookie crime

user23: i fear one of the pookies may have killed the other if this went on any longer

maxverstappen1: wouldn't you like to know weather boy

landonorris: um yes? i hate surprises

maxverstappen1: i think you might like this one 😈

landonorris: that emoji makes me think you've been scheming

maxverstappen1: maybe i have? you'll just have to wait and see ...

landonorris: STOP I CAN HEAR YOUR EVIL LAUGHTER FROM HERE

landonorris: seriosuly how many of you are in on this it sounds like a pack of hyenas this is meant to be SECRET santa

alexalbon: what do you mean i don't know anything about this ...

landonorris: alex YOU CAN'T STOP LAUGHING AROUND ME

alexalbon: maybe i just find you real funny lando?

landonorris: really?

alexalbon: NO

user24: they are enjoying torturing him way too much

maxverstappen1: call it karma for all the shit he talked throughout the season

landonorris: NOO I THOUGHT I WAS GETTING A NICE GIFT ???

maxverstappen1: oh it's definitely a gift for somone...

landonorris: i deadass won't come to the paddock

yourusername: you'll win it soon lands - just wait for max to retire so i can support you wholeheartedly

landonorris: why not now :((((

yourusername: don't worry babe he's old he'll retire in no time

landonorris: yay 🥳 🙌 😀

maxverstappen1: excuse me?

landonorris: is four championships and y/n not enough?

maxverstappen1: no!

maxverstappen1

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maxverstappen1: not just because i want another trophy, but i'll pick up my best secret santa award now thanks

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user25: he didn't ???

user26: i think he did

user27: is that not like prostitution?

maxverstappen1: i don't think giving lando a chance to embarrass himself on a date is prostitution

user28: do you have any faith in him?

maxverstappen1: in him? no. but does y/n also have horrible standards and is easily impressed? yes.

alexalbon: he folded so quickly i hope they got it all on camera

oscarpiastri: that was so humiliating it might have to go on a more x rated website

landonorris: OSCAR????

oscarpiastri: it was harrowing mate but she seemed to like it so go you?

carlossainz55: that was a crazy reaction for it to just be y/n

maxverstappen1: i think you're trying to be funny but it might JUST be a skill issue

landonorris: JUST Y/N? KILL YOURSELF

carlossainz55: woah where is the christmas cheer?

landonorris: i will run you over with my sleigh

landonorris: THIS IS THE BEST GIFT ANYONE HAS EVER GOTTEN ME PLEASE LEAVE ME ALONE

user29: bro is so down bad that he just took carlando out back and shot them

user30: bro is so lost in the sauce that he is threatening a festive hit and run

yourusername: okay max we can stop pretending that i wasn't also begging you to set me up with lando

maxverstappen1: but it's so funny watching him make a fool of himself

landonorris: HUH???

yourusername: newsflash baby, i'm just as in love with you as you are with me

landonorris: AHHHHHHHHH <333333333

landonorris: i'm sorry i'll get back to being in love with you one sec

landonorris: @alexalbon @georgerussell63 @oscarpiastri @carlossainz55 SUCK ON THAT

landonorris: okay i love you y/n :3

yourusername: i love you too you crazy boy

landonorris

liked by maxverstappen1, alexalbon and 1,430,973 others

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landonorris: christmas wishes do come true!

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user34: so how long do you think he's had that shirt in preparation?

landonorris: 18 months at least - i have faith in myself even if the others didn't

user35: i can't tell if that's creepy or?

landonorris: IT'S ROMANTIC

yourusername: kiss me it's christmas!

landonorris: only because it's christmas?

yourusername: i guess i can give you a couple more passes...

landonorris: not to be dramatic but now i know what it feels like i might die without it

yourusername: not dramatic at all !!!

maxverstappen1: it is kinda dramatic ...

yourusername: SHUSH!

maxverstappen1: i knew you were mushy about this (your diary reads like a very badly written romance book) but good lord this is awful THESE ARE PUBLIC COMMENTS

yourusername: I FUCKING KNEW YOU READ MY DIARY

maxverstappen1: duh! how else did you think this little scheme came to be?

yourusername: ugh i guess

user36: so like where do i get an f1 driver bestfriend who will invade my privacy to get me a bf?

user37: might just start throwing my diary in the paddock at this point

alexalbon: ur so pathetic i love you

yourusername: excuse me old man

alexalbon: old? OLD?

yourusername: i don't care to google you but i've seen you try and read a menu and scan a QR code so stop declaring your love for my boyf or i will keep going

landonorris: she's so possessive 😩😩😩

yourusername: i ate too many grapes on new year's eve to not get and keep my man

alexalbon: trust me, no one wants ur man

yourusername: tell that to the teenage girls in my DMs

user38: it's a pleasant surprise to see that y/n is just as down bad as lando

user39: match made in heaven ... this MIGHT make me a max verstappen fan

user40: i fear this will be an f1 custody battle for the ages

yourusername

liked by landonorris, oscarpiastri and 78,209 others

tagged: landonorris

yourusername: my only wish this year was to finally get you <3

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user41: i already liked this queen but a queen who loves britney spears christmas... that's mother

user42: one of these most underrated christmas songs ever

oscarpiastri: ... some people have even witnessed her live rendition of it

yourusername: don't sound too excited about it then

oscarpiastri: i appreciated the enthusiasm but like i feel like it was a PRIVATE moment ... not for the whole of the garage to see

landonorris: someone is missing lily ....

user43: i am trying to be joyful as per the holiday season but i am absolutely seething with jealousy

user44: hey siri play that should be me

yourusername: nope sorry never gonna happen :P

user45: okay girl you've made your point no need to rub it in our faces

yourusername: actually i think i will! my bf is pretty why wouldn't i show that off ?

user46: yall can hate her for this but realistically this is how we'd all be if we pulled lando

landonorris: you guys acting as if i'm the catch when it's literally her...

user47: do we think santa's elves can make me a lando norris? REAL ANSWERS ONLY ...

maxverstappen1: WOW you wouldn't think this was a double date trip ...

yourusername: you can't complain about BOTH of us pining and then be annoyed about us being lovey dovey

maxverstappen1: i can and i WILL

landonorris: you know what max you can complain all you want because this has been the BEST secret santa ever

maxverstappen1: so you won't call me a dirty driver next season?

landonorris: eh?

yourusername: make no mistake lando, i may love you but my loyalties on track remain with max

landonorris: as long as you're still coming home with me i guess i'll deal with it

yourusername: luv u xxxx

landonorris: i love you tooooo xxx

user48: is y/n going to do more for the on track tension than the literal fia?

yourusername: always gotta be a woman sorting everything out

user50: babe i think max is just afraid of you and lando is so in love he'll do anything for you

yourusername: AS THEY SHOULD BE

fin.

note: and on the first day of christmas aston martini gave to me a smau that undos all of our max vs lando tension from the season !! thought i'd treat yall to the first day early <33

[alchemistc]

Harry twirls a lock of dark curls between his fingers. Tips his chin against Tommy's head and stares up at the ceiling. He considers not asking, this time.

The sex is good, and Tommy's funny, and if he closes his eyes he could imagine there could be something - Tommy twitches and shifts his hand lower like he might be gearing up for another round, and it breaks the fantasy. That's new.

"Tell me about him," Harry says, and Tommy's eyes tip up to glare at Harry.

"Making an assumption, there," Tommy warns, but Harry just raises an eyebrow. Six years of this and Harry knows better than to expect Tommy would show up at his door for any reason other than to get his mind off of something - someone else.

"So we're both asses," Harry intones. He needs to call the super, see what they'll do about the water stain on his ceiling. "Tell me about him."

Tommy sighs. Twists, drifts away to the second pillow, and Harry's done this enough times not to mourn the loss, exactly. It's not like he's ever told Tommy -

"He's too young. Impulsive. New."

Harry fails to hold in his snort. "Okay."

Tommy at 34 had been a fucking hurricane. Newly out, no holds barred, he'd jumped right into the deep end and let the storm whirl him around. They'd been friends, for the first six months, Harry a watchful presence while Tommy made it his mission to be more than the guy in the dark corner getting a risky blowie fifteen minutes before last call. To be out - not loud, that wasn't Tommy's style - but to at least be himself.

He'd lasted two months in a real, actual relationship before he'd shown up at Harry's door with a six pack and a box of condoms.

"He looks at me and sees this - cool suave guy -" Harry shifts, nearly interrupts because that guy is exactly what Tommy projects, even if he doesn't mean to. Fucking Scorpios. "- and I was falling for him."

Yeah. Harry can extrapolate from that. Tommy fell ass over tea kettle and then got spooked.

"He's just so fucking open with himself. No brainworm goes untouched, and he can't hide his emotions for shit, and he's so goddamn stubborn and so goddamn ready to bulldoze through every hurdle ahead without looking back at the damage, and..." Tommy trails off. One hand shifts down to hitch the duvet up over his hips, and Harry adds the duvet cover to his list of laundry. "I gave him too many chances to slow down on his own."

"What, did the kid ask you to marry him or something?"

"He's the Himbo," Tommy retorts, and it takes Harry a moment to make the connection. He whistles through his teeth just to watch the scowl fall into place on Tommy's face. "And the connection freaked him out so much he asked me to move in. To his bachelor pad loft." Harry waits. "It has two balconies, Harry. Two."

"...he knows you have a mortgage, right?"

Tommy shoves at his shoulder. "It doesn't matter. We're just - the timing wasn't right."

"Did you want it to be?"

That's always the thing he ends up hung up on, in Harry's experience. Tommy's scared out of his mind to be the right person at the wrong time. Always has been. There's probably some mommy or daddy issues hidden in there somewhere he hasn't explored. Tommy's eyes drift up to the water stain. "Don't these apartments all have the same layout?"

This is the shove-off. This is his hint not to push. "Yes, and I really don't want to ask how the upstairs neighbor flooded their bedroom. Back to the guy." He's never been one for acknowledging unspoken cues.

"Buck," Tommy says, and the name sounds harsh in his mouth.

"Buck," Harry repeats, and pictures Tommy's usual type - tall, light-eyed, more smiles than common sense. There was always something distinctive, too - freckles, a scar, weird shaped ears.

"I miss him."

It doesn't hurt the way it had those first few years, when Harry was convinced that eventually Tommy would see him as more than a friend to blow off steam with. Still. There's a twinge there, beneath his rib cage.

"So stop missing him. That's an option, isn't it?"

And Tommy does that thing - that frustrating, enchanting thing, where his whole body seems to hold the emotion flickering across his face. "I walked out on him. I dug the damn knife in just to make sure he wouldn't try to convince me to stay."

"Would you have? Stayed?"

Tommy's quiet. The sweat has cooled on his skin, and the lights coming in through his window dance across the skin of his shoulder, his chest, that stupid thick neck of his.

The phone he left on the bedside table is dark, but that doesn't stop Tommy's gaze flicking to it.

"Cards on the table, Tommy?" Harry sucks in a breath. Blows it out through his nose. "Once upon a time, I convinced myself you were it for me. That I'd be satisfied with what you gave me, and I wouldn't ask for more. I cut you out of my life for eight months when I realized how fucking dumb that was."

Tommy frowns. Harry hadn't really ever expected him to notice.

"I've seen you through shitty relationships, and one sided ones. I've heard all the bullshit you and Greg put each other through. I've been there for every fucking heartache."

And he'd offered up his body like it was absolution for always being fucking thrilled when a relationship ended.

"You called me Evan," Harry murmurs, and Tommy's eyes go wide. That's never fucking happened before. This thing wouldn't have lasted nearly as long if he'd ever heard another man's name in his bed before. "You should shower. Go home. Take a day or two, if you need it. But I know for a fact you wait this shit out, justify coming to me with time and space from whatever guy has you strung out. I know it's been a minute already, and I know you've never sounded so unsure about cutting someone loose."

Tommy's gaze flicks to him.

"Whatever it is that's got you so scared of this guy, figure it the fuck out. Because it sounds to me like you fell fast and hard and hit a fucking wall before you ever thought to tap the brakes. That's not fair to you or him. Call him. Text him. Show up at his door with a bouquet or an industrial size bottle of lube and figure your shit out. Together."

Tommy stares at him for a long, long time in silence.

"Them's the brakes, huh?"

Harry hates that he knows exactly what Tommy means. Still, he clarifies. "This is your forever guy." Six years of watching him flail and learn and grow and hurt and love and fuck. He knows a thing or two about Tommy and his flights of romance. Knows this lonely man has never sounded quite so lonely before. "You don't need me, anymore."

He's quiet as his eyes drift back up to the stain. "I'm not his forever guy." Harry can't actually refute that, considering he's never met the guy. But he knows Tommy. Knows exactly how captivating he can be. Knows Tommy's a sucker for that starry-eyed look that so often has meant not love, as Tommy reads it, but idolization. "What if I'm not his forever guy?"

Harry digs toes into the spot in the duvet where Tommy's knees should be. He shifts Tommy about half a millimeter. "He has a nickname you don't call him except when you're punishing yourself. He dated Abby and that shared history didn't scare him off. You'd never let yourself fall for a guy that wasn't throwing clear signs that it was serious. I'd put my odds on him doing something weird and wholesome every time he thinks about you until his entire two balcony loft is filled with trinkets or treats and he still can't get you off his mind."

Harry's never seen Tommy's face do that before. Not in the throes of a honeymoon phase and not in the worst of a bad breakup. It's some awful mixture between unbridled hope and abject despair.

Harry thinks it's probably fair to hate him a little, for that face. He's earned the right.

"If he kicks you to the curb, I'll take you to one of those expensive wine tastings you pretend to hate, and I'll let you drink all my samples too." It's not an idle promise. Tommy may pretend to hate it but Harry fucking loves wine tastings. "If he doesn't..." Harry shoots him a fond look, "...knowing your type I'm not invited to the wedding anyway, so I guess then I'd been seeing you around."

Something shadows his gaze for a moment, but he's quick to hide it, to smack Harry on the chest like they've just had a good game, to shift out of bed and into his briefs before Harry can blink. He doesn't love Tommy. Not the way he'd have liked to, years and years ago. Still, when Tommy shoots him the dorkiest finger guns known to man and scoops up the rest of his clothes to take to the bathroom with him, Harry still wonders what it's like to have him enough to love him fully.

---

The name catches him off guard every time he hears it. 'Evan' isn't hard to filter - Evan had been a popular enough name to immediately write it off but Buck wasn't white noise of a name

Buck was a character in a movie, an old grizzled war vet, a dog. The name Buck wasn't popular enough not to hear it every time it was so much as whispered in his direction.

The coffee shop isn't crowded, but it's not dead either. When the girl at the counter calls out an order for Buck, sliding three cups down the counter, Harry can't help but look up.

A tall broad shouldered hulk of a man smiles a dimpled smile at the barista, and Harry watches him palm two cups and grab the third one in one practiced move. He's cute, Harry thinks. Maybe his grandpa ordered, Harry thinks, a little harder, and then caves, following his path through the three-tops littering the lobby.

Harry catches sight of him without being noticed. He's grinning, one of those rare earnest ones that make his ears rise and his face crinkle like a Shar Pei, hand spread out over something lying open on the table. The little girl on the seat to his right is a surprise, but Harry hasn't spoken to Tommy in two years. Maybe he's had enough time to get his mind around the idea that he's nothing like his father. The girl responds to something Tommy says by palming at as much of his face as she can reach and turning to the man now approaching their table.

"Uncle Buck!" he catches, another firm tug at the part of his brain that's been stuck on this for too long. The man barely gets all three drinks on the table before the girl is launching herself up into his arms, and it's too late for Harry to turn away without notice. Tommy's gaze shifts across the room and lands right on him.

He looks like he might wave Harry over, and Harry would rather die than know whether Tommy would introduce him as an old friend, or by name like Buck should know it. He tips a smile Tommy's way. Raises a brow at the man - Buck - and gets lips being sucked behind teeth in response, and then a slow, subtle head tilt.

Good. Good for him. Harry's never wanted anything for Tommy but to see him incandescently happy.

Witnessing it from a distance is better.

Buck twirls his - niece? - flops her back down on the bench seat next to Tommy and bends to say something that includes a pinky promise. He's got a wine-dark stain just above his brow, and Harry can't quite hide the tip of his smile.

Harry's name rings in his ears as he picks up his drink, and he's halfway to the door, feeling proud of himself for not turning back, when he hears the chorus of three laughs erupting from the corner where he'd taken his last good look.

He'd seen the ring on insta, a week and a half ago. Just an uncaptioned picture of two bands balanced one over the other on a rock, a killer sunset sky blurry behind them. No tags. 102 likes and counting.

Harry pushes through the doors and only glances through the window to watch Tommy tip his head back in laughter for a second, before he's cleared the coffee shop and rounded the corner back to his office.

[quill-of-thoth]

The Saga of Great Uncle Asshole And The Priest From Hell

It's thanksgiving (in the US) so have a family gathering disaster that is old enough to be funny. Almost a decade ago, after a life of stirring up drama everywhere she went, my grandmother died. She was an unhappy woman who tried to be better to her grandkids than she was to her kids, and didn't always succeed, and she's the reason that when I smell cinnamon tic tacs they're accompanied by the reek of an illusory cigarette. This is not a sad post. This is a post about the fact that her funeral was a fucking disaster and it was ultimately about 50% her fault. See, my whole family was at one point or another catholic. Grandma really enjoyed going to church in her last years because it got her out of the nursing home, and priests have to listen when you tell them about the husband you divorced and the children who think they know better than you. Grandma did not consider the fact that the local priest she'd latched onto like a talkative moray eel in a cloud of nicotine smoke was an unmitigated bigot. She left instructions that she wanted her funeral to be at that specific catholic church and for that priest to do the sermon. It didn't occur to her that the person who would be organizing her funeral would be her gay daughter and her daughter's wife.

Shit started getting real about when the doors opened to recieve mourners. Over the course of ten minutes, my aunt summoned:

her elder sister, a paralegal

my father, who has never seen a conflict he would not cheerfully walk away from

Their younger brother, in order to swear at the priest

My mother, who hadn't had a good opportunity to fight a priest since we left our own church and was game to do it again.

This left me, the eldest grandchild, in charge of the receiving line, despite the fact that I knew approximately no one there. My brother and cousins were woodenly shaking hands and then whispering "who's that?" "I don't know." My aunt's husband was escorting the elderly and infirm up the stairs one at a time. My uncle's wife was also around but she knew even fewer people and was mostly listening at the door of the ongoing argument.

So when my brother and Boy cousin went to see if we could pry someone who knew who was related to us out of the argument and I was busy trying to convince an octegenarian that she did NOT need to figure out which of her cousins had married one of grandma's siblings before sitting down, Girl Cousin was alone at the door.

Great Uncle Asshole arrived in a storm of curses and a faux-coonskin cap. He blew past Girl Cousin, thumped his cane up the steps, and seized my hand. It was like shaking hands with an extremely strong mummy. "You look just like your mother! It's the hair, what a bird's nest. Where's your daddy? And the rest of Helen's brood."

I muttered something about them finalizing details with the priest.

"Well, they'll come see me soon enough. Bet you don't know who I am!" I didn't know who anyone was. Everyone older than me was having a verbal cage match with a member of the clergy or escorting some other old fogey to their seats, everyone younger than me had even fewer clues, and my only hope was to wrap this conversation as fast as possible. "Nope!" I said, "I haven't seen most of the people here in years." If I had ever seen them in the first place. He was going to be mad, but I figured if I had to be the bouncer I could probably take an eighty-something year old guy who breathed like the surgeon general's personal warning to smokers. I could at least shut the door on him.

"Of course you wouldn't! Your gran wouldn't have told you. I'm your great uncle Roger, and I'm here to bury the hatchet, by which I mean your grandma! She and I swore over our father's casket we'd never be under the same roof again while we both lived, and by god I kept my oath!" People were starting to stare, and it was at this moment that a thirty-something man in a suit sprinted up the stairs, and my uncle's wife, with a look of dawning horror, called her husband. "Roger's here." The middle aged folks descended immediately. Here is a snapshot of the ensuing conversation: "Roger, why don't we find you a seat?" - my mother in her best teacher voice "Glad to see you're doing well enough to make it" - My father, in his best 'good god I want to be anywhere else' voice. "Take me to the coffin! I want to see her with my own two eyes!" - Great Uncle Asshole, "And hang up my **** hat! Killed it myself!" "I'm so sorry, I didn't know he could walk that fast" - strange suit man "If you are QUITE finished, I am starting the ceremony in ten minutes" - the priest

As my father and his brother towed a grinning and cursing old man to the furthest reaches of the family section, my mother and my oldest aunt caught all the cousins up on the argument with the priest. My youngest aunt was still crying while her wife stared fixedly at the stained glass panes and periodically handed over tissues. The upshot of it all was that my aunt and her wife would be allowed to attend the funeral (on pain of the whole family literally walking out on the priest) but would not be allowed to take communion, because the priest didn't believe in their marriage. My aunt's wife had neglected to point out that, being Jewish, she wasn't going to take communion anyway. "That's fucked" said boy cousin, and the four of us immediately resolved in whispers to refuse communion as well. The priest opened his sermon with pointed remarks about the older generation's devotion and respect for the church. He continued on through psalms and all that until he got to the blessing of the eucharist and asked the family up to receive communion. My father, who hadn't taken communion since I could remember, stayed seated. My mother stayed seated. My aunts and uncles stayed seated. The cousins stayed seated. About a third of the church didn't move. "Well father, I'll have mine! These young folks think hey have all the time in the world to get right with the lord, but you and I know better!" The priest, who had been visibly hoping god would smite us, turned a wincing glare on my great uncle and the series of distant relatives and nursing home neighbors who were now shuffling up. The service dragged on. We were lined up to say goodbye to everyone, while the suit man (who would turn out to be my second cousin) bodily hauled great uncle asshole and his coonskin cap down the stairs. "I should have known my sister wouldn't manage to raise any good Catholics! Horrible woman." he said loudly as he was stuffed into a car driven by suit man's apparent twin. The priest approached as we were finally ready to leave, to ask why we were so stubborn that we deprived ourselves of communion. After all, unlike my youngest aunt, we weren't obvious sinners! "Oh, I'm Lutheran" - My eldest aunt. "I'm an atheist" - My uncle "I don't think you're qualified to bless anything." - My mother, who learned her religion primarily from a horde of socialist-leaning nuns.

With that, we left the wreck of my grandmother's funeral behind. "Helen," said my mother, very deliberately, when we were safely in the car, "would have HATED that." My dad started laughing. "Are you kidding? She would have loved that! It would have been all she complained about for years!"

[theclownghoul]

Arcane Season 2 has me messed up and not in a good way

It’s actually breaking my heart that I don’t love this show anymore.

I don’t want to hate it, there’s pieces I love but there’s also pieces I hate. Act l had me in such high hopes and then it stuttered then crashed and burned.

I just feel so disappointed with so many parts of it. Actively angry at others.

There are some moments that I loved that had me feeling the same high as the first season but every time I thought things would develop better they didn’t.

I think I’m only really happy with Ekko and I was worried about him for much of the season. As an Ekko and Jinx shipper I was pleased with most of their story but the way they ended Jinx’s story undermined the importance of their talk so…

Honestly I would trade all the ship stuff for a proper story arc for Vi, Jinx, Cait and the rest

I saw the signs for Vi as soon as her pit fighter arc didn’t extend passed the promo clips. I kept waiting to delve into her issues but that never came.

Jinx was done so dirty. And this was something I prayed wouldn’t happen. She’s so personal to me in ways that would take too long to go into here. I had high hopes for her, especially after Isha and her starting to move forward, I knew it wouldn’t last but I knew (hoped) it would be interesting. I fully expected Isha to die but the way it happened was so weird?? The scene itself felt like it was manipulating me which is something I hate with a passion.

Likewise I expected her to relapse into suicidality after that and I had suspected that the scene with Ekko would happen. Her scene with Vi beforehand hurt in a good way and I wanted to watch as she hit rock bottom then clawed her way back as she started to mend the broken relationships in her life.

The thing that finally set me off was her hair. I thought she would cut it after she decided to live, as a show a change but before was just so cliché (it did look cute but don’t go trying to distract me)

I really didn’t want people blaming Vi for Jinx running off to try to end herself again. And I didn’t, even though I knew something was wrong about the way the scene played out and lead into the sex scene. I knew something was wrong I was just hoping that I was wrong.

I was so looking forward to the CaitVi sex scene, since King Princess was revealed for the soundtrack. Hoping her and Cait would have a real ass conversation, a hard conversation and then get that moment together but it just felt wrong. I wanted to love it but I didn’t. As a King Princess fan I was so excited but all I feel now is at best apathy and at worst anger. The more I read from lesbians in the fandom and those that care for Vi how I care for Jinx the worse I feel.

Briefly let’s talk about Cait. I was interested in her arc after Act l. Messy it would be and a long road back for sure but I had hope. She was done dirty too.

Back to Jinx…. What the fuck was that ending? Her “sacrifice” felt so similar to her fights with Vi (Act l) and Ekko (S1) where she was going to let herself die. No growth from the rest of the season, that’s how they left us, that’s what they did to a character that they did so beautifully in S1. I don’t care if she’s alive, that’s not a fucking ending.

(Apologies for continuing to bring up my predictions. I just think it’s funny how my thoughts make more sense than what we got)

I didn’t mind the idea of her sacrificing herself for Vi, Arcane is a tragedy after all. Her being the one to protect her sister in the end not because she thought Vi was better off without her but because Vi protects everyone and her sister can help now would have been great.

But that ending rubbed me wrong in every way.

The story of these sisters meant everything to me and what a fool we all were to think it was in competent hands. Like seriously I can’t believe this is the same writing team.

All of us went in with high hopes and then had those hopes crushed.

I’ve seen so many people who were excited to react and analyze go radio silent after Act ll and I hope they stay that way. I’d love to change my mind but I don’t think I can. I don’t think there’s any coming back.

I wanted to take the good moments and leave it alone but I keep feeling the disappointment because the show’s first season left a mark on me that I’ll treasure forever and I can’t let go. I still have so many feelings about this. Piltover and Zaun, Victor and Jayce, Mel and Ambessa, admittedly not my area of expertise but safe to say they all deserved better and we deserved better.

I would say it felt like a fanfic but I know fans have more grace and respect for this story.

This is not the tragedy I signed up for.

[district4loading]

One of your girls

Twice Sana!Sub x Female Reader!Dom

5k Words

Content Warning: smut, fingering, oral, strap-on, slight possessive/jealous reader, breeding kink, hair pulling

Minors DNI

A/N: This isn't my first time writing, I have a bunch of other random stories and smuts in my drafts. Feel free to ask me anything and request stuff. When I have the time I will work on introducing you guys to me and the things I will/won't write along with the groups I stan.

With that being said, please enjoy! It's mostly smut

-

“So then, am I one of your girls?”

-

"You know, I saw a headline the other day titled 'Sana of Twice rumored to have been in multiple relationships with women'" You spoke softly, still hearing whines and whimpers coming from the girl above you as you slid the pad of your middle finger through her slick folds "Well, it wasn't like an established article or anything, more so a Tik tok video with rumors that saesangs—"

Sana sighed desperately, she honestly didn't give a fuck about whatever you were on about now. You were laid flat on your belly between her legs, face and fingers oh so close to where she needed you to be right now and you were talking about one among her many gay rumors. How could you possibly be thinking about anything else right now but getting her off? It was really all you were good for anyways. As you kept on speaking, explaining how the rumors were basically baseless claims she cut you off "Uh? Y/n.. can - fuck - can you just.. please"

You stopped speaking, considering the idea that you really could've been doing something better with your mouth right now. So you hummed "Yeah sorry, I just thought it was funny because it's true and nobody believes it... some even say that you're the straightest member" You snickered, finding that term being associated with Minatozaki Sana—of all people—to be humorous.

Sana more so huffed, the noise coming out of her mouth bubbling with impatience "Well that's no mere coincidence, i'm careful and I know how to pick my girls... now please just - Ah Fuck!" The girl's sentence was cut off by a guttural moan which tore from her lips because like the asshole you were, you decide to actually do something while she was speaking. Sana would never complain about that though, the moment you finally slid your finger past her folds and into her hot entrance she was inexplicably satisfied by the sensation.

Her legs tried to close a bit but they ended up only squeezing you because you were in the way. "So then, am I one of your girls?" You questioned her. Now, it wasn't like you didn't assume that Sana probably had some sort of roster, how could you not? The girl was one amongst the most attractive k-pop idols in the industry so of course she had options.

You just wanted to be her best one.

"You know you are - mmh" Sana's eyes clamped shut the moment you curled your finger. You feared to push another in because of the way her hot walls hugged you. She was so tight, like she hadn't been fucked by anyone else before this in a while. Which made sense because the last time you saw her was maybe a month ago? You slowly pumped your fingers in and out, allowing her to feel the stretch of the digit as much as she could.

You merely hummed in response to what she said, "When was the last time you've had sex?" It probably wasn't wise to ask her questions like this when you were two knuckles deep inside of her but you were curious and it's sort of relevant.

"Fuck- I don't know... whens the last time you were here?" She managed to say the words properly without breaking or moaning which was impressive considering that each time you made it to the hilt, your finger brushed passed her g-spot. Another thing you noticed, that quite frankly made your ears perk, was that Sana hadn't had sex with anyone but you in the past month. "I haven't had much time to - God - you know... because of work" Her hips began to squirm.

You couldn't help but smile as you slid your ring finger inside, eliciting a sharp and higher pitched moan from Sana. "Is it because of work or the fact that nobody can fuck like me?" You teased picking up the pace a bit. Sana just threw her head back, struggling to tell you to shut up as she arched her back while you continued to stretch her out.

Then finally, it was the time you decided to actually put your mouth to a much better use. You dipped your head down and stuck your tongue out, flattening it against Sana's warm clit feeling it pulse and throb like an irregular heart beat. Now your head was really being squeezed between her slim thighs as she keened, a cute noise escaping her lips.

It was obvious she hadn't done this in a while and if you couldn't tell by what she said or how tight she was, you would've known by how reactive she had been. So sensitive and needy, twitching - hips bucking at every graze and eventual touch you offered to any part of her bare skin. You swirled your tongue around the bundle of nerves "Fuck - just like that - Ah! - don't stop, baby" Sana gasped with her hands fondling her own breasts, tweaking her stiff nipples which were still glossy from your saliva.

You hummed, sucking the warm bud in, taking care of her properly like you always did. With your fingers still repeatedly hitting her g-spot you knew she had to be right there. You made a mental note as her breathing increased and she began cursing over and over again. Small phrases like "Fuck" and "Shit" but in different combinations. Sometimes she would chant them one after the other or she'd just stick to repeating one. "Fuck - If you keep - oh God yes - You're - You're - shit - gonna make me fucking -"

Her eyes were wired shut now, just after she had gathered up the courage to raise her head to watch you. Now she was about to cum all over your fingers and in your mouth and you couldn't wait for it. Her taste was delicious in only the most filthiest ways. Since Sana had to take care of her body, being a k-pop idol and all, she loved to eat fruit which is why she always made for the sweetest meal. You were more so doing it for your pleasure and hers rather than just hers.

"Cumming... Cumming... I'm..." Sana was heaving now, words she tried to say not being able to come out. Instead she mouthed them, it was the best she could do. From what you could make out she was only just repeating the audible words she last uttered. Cumming. Then in the blink of an eye, her back was arched the highest it could go, her body shuddering and shaking as she moaned the loudest she has tonight. Well it was more of an adorable squeal, which you noticed by now that she only did when she was cumming hard.

She began to leak all over your fingers as you slowed them to help her ride out her orgasm. When her body collapsed back onto the bed, you knew she was done. So you withdrew completely, sliding your fingers out and crawling up her hot body. She smiled lazily, allowing you to leave kisses on her lips that she couldn't even begin to reciprocate. Sana tried though, kissing you back just enough to satisfy the both of you. "Satisfied?" You questioned Sana as you stared into her still lust filled eyes.

"mm-mm" She shook her head, you knew she would. There was really only one way that she could be truly 'satisfied' by you and that was when you were 6-8 inches inside, hitting all of her deepest spots. You dipped your head into the crook of her neck, leaving kisses and small sucks on the warm flesh. The salty flavor was intoxicating. "Get the...mm, in the drawer" She told you.

A smirk grew on your face, you knew exactly what she needed right now and after a month with no sex you couldn't blame her. All the more you were glad that the first person she called over when she finally had time was you. So you left one more kiss on Sana's neck and went into the bottom drawer by her nightstand. "Which one?" You questioned her, seeing that there were a few new additions to her collection of toys.

"Your choice"

That was all she said and it made a giddy feeling emerge inside of you. Sana wanted you to choose a toy to ruin her with. She should know not to put that kind of power into your hands. You were no sadist, but if she gave you an inch, you wouldn't ever hesitate to take a mile. So you picked up the black strap-on, the biggest one in the collection. Maybe almost the length of Sana's forearm with a girth that made the silicone look all too intimidating.

Sana's eyes widened, pupils blown as she saw what you picked and sure enough, a smirk grew on her face."You know, you look the prettiest like that" You told her as you put the attachment on. She was just watching you, sitting naked on her heels as you got ready.

"So i'm the prettiest when i'm about to get fucked is what you're saying?" She teased, faking as if she was offended. "Not when i'm on a magazine cover or performing or modeling? You know, that's crazy because those times are when I actually try to look pretty"

You shook your head after finally working your way through the straps "mm-mm, because all those things are for everybody else to see. I mean sure, you are drop dead gorgeous no matter what" You paused then climbed onto the bed and on top of the idol to which she gave no resistance to lay down and let you in between her legs. "But nothing compares to the complete and utter... raw... lust and desire in your eyes right now. The one that you only look at me with." You kissed her neck once "That along with that sexy smirk of yours... makes for the prettiest face ever"

Sana hummed ignoring the part where you said that she only looked at you with lust and desire. It wasn't true, but she decided to let you have that one. "I didn't think of it that way, why are you so poetic?" She giggled a bit.

You just shrugged your shoulders "No idea... you ready?" You asked as you lined the head of the toy up with her entrance.

"mm-hm, just be careful. It's been long and you decided to pick the biggest one" You nodded, then pushed your hips forward a bit and fuck - it's in. You heard a sharp wince escape Sana's lips and then a delicate moan followed it as she shut her eyes. So you leaned down, allowing her to wrap her legs around your waist and her arms around your back as you went further... deeper.

The way her face twisted up, eyebrows knitting together, pouty lips almost frowning. You didn't know what you were thinking before because this was indeed the prettiest she's ever looked. You didn't say it though, you just called her name softly, not moving any deeper "Sana?" Her name escaped your lips so easily. She opened her eyes and looked deep into yours "You okay?"

Sana nodded, humming in response "Yes, please keep going" She gave you the green light verbally so you pushed your hips forwards some more. Sana was making that face again and god you wished you could feel her inside. She probably felt so fucking good, you envied any man she's ever slept with because it had to have been a life changing experience.

You sighed "I wish I could get you pregnant" It really just came out, you didn't even realize you said it out loud until Sana started to giggle.

"Wait" She stopped you just to laugh a little harder. "You're about to fuck me and you're thinking about getting me pregnant?" She asked, still not believing the words that just came out of your mouth.

"Well, yeah. Isn't it fitting?"

"Yeah except you can't"

"I know, that's why I said it... well, I thought it, I didn't even mean to say it out loud" You muttered, causing Sana to laugh even harder at you. Another sigh falls from your lips, you felt a bit embarrassed by your sudden expression of affection. You knew Sana found it funny because that wasn't at all what this was. She wasn't yours, you weren't hers and it bothered you, a lot. So you decided to shut her up, fully bottoming out without warning.

A scream tore from her lips, the loudest of the night at the sudden assault. "Oh my god" She squeezed your body harder "I told you to be careful" She complained, knowing that she was gonna be sore later. You didn't care though, you were pissed because she was laughing at you.

"Shut up" You muttered before drawing back and sliding all the way back in. She moaned loudly, her eyes rolling back as you began thrusting your hips hard and deep at a steady pace. She was struggling to get a grip while you changed angles.

"Fuck" Thrust "You're" Thrust "Hitting my-" Thrust "Ah! Fuck." You did it on purpose, fucking her like this just to make her a dumb mess while she spoke. There was something uniquely satisfying at the way each of your thrusts pushed a single word out of her throat. It made you so wet, having this exceptionally beautiful girl under you like this. You felt the slick arousal collecting between your thighs - Fuck and not to mention the way the seat of the toy brushed up against your clit each time you made it to the hilt. 'I could cum like this' You told yourself, feeling butterflies erupting in your belly with another surge of arousal.

You leaned forwards, putting your mouth on hers as you kept moving your hips, thrusts still hard and deep. She loved it this way and you knew it, you knew her body so well by now. You were catching her enthusiastic moans and swallowing each wonderful sound with your mouth as you kissed her more. As expected you did most of the work, licking, sucking and biting at her swollen lips. You couldn't get enough of her and it seemed like she felt the same way about you with how she squeezed her legs around you.

'This has got to be my favorite toy' You thought to yourself, sighing as you felt the slippery friction attacking your sweet spot in all the right ways. Sana couldn't even tell that you were feeling it because she was too fucked out and dizzy to notice your irregular breathing or your pleasureful grunts. It was all a blur in her mind right now as she carved sweet red marks into your back.

You pulled back a bit, now she was holding onto your biceps as you looked down to watch where your bodies met. She was clenching, you could tell because of the slight resistance you felt upon drawing back. You leaned all the way back down, your lips next to her ears. "You're about to cum aren't you?" You teased "Bet you've been waiting for this - God - you've been waiting for me to come over and fuck you dumb"

"Ah- yes, yes, yes, yes" Sana chanted, gasping as she felt that hot coil in the pit of her stomach, a feeling that she'd been craving for so long and God it was happening—and it was happening while you were between her legs. "Pl-Plea-uh Please!" She began begging, what for? Your permission of course but you were feeling generous this particular night.

"Go ahead baby, be a good girl and cum for me, Sana" You used the term she loved to be called. It only got her that much closer as you rolled your hips in a rhythm, the same one that kept her legs shaking and her walls fluttering. "Fuck - look at you, so fucking pretty while you're getting ruined"

"I...I-I can't... I'm cumming, I'm cumming, I'm cumming—" Sana repeated the words over and over like a broken record until one more "I'm" and before she could even continue, the coil snapped and she was orgasming with her back rising to form a wonderful bow shape. As if she was being summoned by God himself and well—it definitely felt like she was. Her body shaking and stuttering as you kept the same pace which if you knew Sana you knew it was crucial in helping her ride it out.

When she stopped moving, and her moans and gasps reduced to tired whimpers you took it as a sign that her peak had tapered off. You kissed her sweetly on the lips as you slid all the way out, but you weren't done yet. "Roll over" You asked softly, noticing that look in her eye. She was so down for more—another thing you really liked about Sana. The girl could go rounds and rounds and rounds without being boring or getting tired.

Sana slowly but surely turned over so that she could be on all fours—or at least try to be—she lazily allowed her upper body to rest on the mattress and she was just how you liked her to be, face down ass up. You positioned yourself behind her and took the toy into your hand. Once hand squeezing her ass cheek while the other was dragging the tip up and down her messy cunt.

Needy whimpers escaped her lips and she was already trying to push back to achieve some sort of penetration, pressure—anything. This surprised you because you didn't expect her to be so needy for it this soon, but then again it's been a while so you couldn't blame her much. But goddamn she was so sexy when she got like this, the noises she made, the needy movements... all of it so, so sexy and it was all for you. "So needy" You smacked your teeth and let your hands rest on her slim waist, squeezing it for a moment.

"Y/n~" Sana whined your name and it sounded like music to your ears. "Please... Please do something" She begged. You found it so hot, you hadn't even asked her to but she was already begging for you to take her again. You slapped her ass, hard, watching the flesh jiggle while she moaned in response. She loved the stinging pain, as a matter of fact, she got high on it.

"You've got to be specific to get what you want.. Princess" You muttered, knowing it would make her gush and clench over nothing. It was embarrassing how well you knew her body and all the things that made her tick after what? just a few months of hooking up with her. So easy.

"Please—Please" Sana took some time to raise her head and turn back. The sight was one you could only thank God for giving you the eyes to witness. Her eyes were dark and hooded, pretty pink lips swollen, brown hair stuck to her face with the sweat. "I want you to fuck me with that toy, fill me up, pound me, use me... and don't stop until we're both finished" Her words as well as her tone was nothing short of filthy lust, the kind that you would only hear in a porno. You fucking loved it.

Smirking, you took the toy into your hand and nudged the tip into her entrance. She was still looking back and when your eyes met hers, you pushed your hips forwards nice and slow. You watched as her eyebrows began to knit, mouth forming an 'o' shape as she took the girthy toy inside. When you made it to the hilt, Sana's upper body collapsed back into the bed and the seat of the toy pushed against your clit in a way that made you gasp. "Fuck... this toy is gonna be the death of me" You almost whimpered out loud, the burning pleasure being way too much to handle.

"Yeah? I knew you'd like it" Sana mentioned, causing you to quirk your eyebrow.

"What? you've used it on someone before?" You questioned her, knowing that she was a bottom that only occasionally liked to switch depending on who she was with. But Sana mostly was the type to seek out dominant women so you were a bit confused.

"mm-mm, i spent the night with a friend a bit ago and she told me all about it" You tilted your head, remembering that she said she hadn't been fucked in a month, and the last time you were here this toy wasn't in the collection.

"That doesn't make sense, Sana"

"What?"

"Earlier you told me that it's been a month since you had sex"

Sana stammered a bit before actually responding to you with words "I mean like it was 3-4 weeks ago so it's basically been a month since then"

You slapped her ass again, this time a bit harder causing a strangled moan to escape her lips. "Was it three or four Sana?" You were beginning to get possessive, knowing that you had no right to but she'd still allow it because she thought it was hot when you got like this.

"Ow- Fuck Y/n does it matter?"

"Yeah, Four weeks is a month, three isn't, so which one is it?" You said lowly.

In reality it's been four weeks, but Sana liked where this was going so she lied. "Three" She stated, closing her eyes as she bit back a smile, bracing herself for a slap that never came. Instead she felt your rough hands gripping her waist, causing her to whimper a bit. Then you began to fuck her, listening to her moan uncontrollably and grip the sheets as you began at a pace way too fast for the small girl to handle. "Y/n! Baby- Fuck... I'm sorry" She whined, getting off on this more than you could ever know.

You paused for a moment and reached over, gathering up her wavy brown hair in a ponytail. You pulled her head up then began fucking her again, her body jolting forwards come each thrust. It was so easy, the way the silicone just slid in and out but you weren't thinking about that, your mind was plagued with a complete jealous anger that burned in your stomach. You were near to her ear at this point "I didn't fucking hear you" You gritted through your teeth.

It was difficult to stay dominant cause - fuck - this toy was really rubbing you in the right places and it felt amazing. But you needed her a sobbing fucked out mess under you before you even thought about cumming so you had to hold it all back. "I'm - Fuck... I'm sorry! I'm sorry! I'm sorry! I'm sorry! I'm—" She kept on apologizing in that whiny tone you loved. She repeated the apology so many times that it was almost comical.

"Sorry for what?"

"Sorry for lying" You hummed as if you wanted her to continue and when she didn't, you slapped her ass again, hard. It seemed to knock some good sense into her because she managed to find the words herself. "Sorry for being a dirty, lying, slut" She specified, absolute filth dripping from her words. You felt that same resistance inside again and that’s what told you that she was getting off on this. You didnt think it'd turn her on that badly but... shit it did.

"You're so fucking filthy, you know" You muttered, letting go of her hair which allowed her to collapse as she wanted to on the bed. "I know you're getting off on this... you probably lied on purpose, knowing that i'd fuck you like this, because you love it, you love the way I fuck don't you?"

"Fuck - yes!" Sana began gripping the sheets once more, leaking and gushing at how aggressive you were being right now. "I love how you fuck me - so hard, so deep - I can - fuck - I can feel it in my fucking guts the way you — god yes right there" She was an utter mess, mumbling and muttering random broken words as you pounded her into the bed.

"Yeah? Who's the best fuck you've ever had?" You were just stroking your ego now, knowing that it was you.

"Y-You, baby... you!" She admitted vocally, moaning loudly as you continued to utterly wreck her. "Just like that baby - Just like that - Just like— Ah!"

You leaned over, pounding your hips into Sana's ass until she lay flat on the bed, your fists pressed into the mattress near either side of her head. Her ass was so soft it felt like you were thrusting into a soft pillow. "Keep fucking — you're fucking me so good - ah - i'm - so fucking close"

"Hold it"

"I-I I can't" She whined, this wasn't good. Sana would normally try to be a good girl, cum when she was allowed to. But tonight you were fucking the absolute shit out of her, hitting spots that she didn't even know existed. She was seeing stars as the pleasure overtook her so she had absolutely no control when it came to holding it this time. When it was happening, it was happening and there was no stopping it. So the best thing she could do? Beg. Beg like the neediest slut in the world so you would give her permission in time.

"Please! Please! Let me cum, please baby" She whined, feeling her legs begin to tremble on their own. Oh God this isn't good- you were merciless, pounding into her just right. Even if you weren't, she beilieved that you had to be some kind of sadist. You knew that she wouldn't be able to hold it when you were fucking her like this but you still told her to. Only a sadist would.. "Fuck- wait... please - it's - it's - it's coming!"

This whole time, you've been holding it too, you were so fucking close. The thought that you were going to cum while you were inside of her, made everything feel ten times better. You began grunting louder and animalistic "Fuck- I'm right there baby" You moaned, feeling it coming.

Sana gasped at this, the noise coming out of her mouth filthy as she realized it, you were going to cum inside of her. That made butterflies erupt in the pit of her stomach where she was oh so close to letting go. "Pl-Please! Breed me - Breed me.. please - w-want your babies..." The poor girl was sobbing now, she was only doing her best to keep up.

But the words she was saying, begging you to breed her. "Fuck - You can cum" You muttered and just like that, with one more stroke and a strangled moan you were cumming. You were cumming while you were maybe 9 inches inside of her. To ride out your high, you kept grinding and then Sana was cumming too, screaming into the sheets as her body shook so recklessly.

Eventually you ground to a stop, leaning over Sana to leave sweet kisses on her sweaty shoulder, then down her spine. You were both out of breath but you loved to worship her perfect body any chance you got. "Y/n?" Sana called your name softly so you hummed in response, your tone gentle as well. "Let me buy you dinner some time"

[untildawnss]

until dawn characters overhearing their partner say something positive about them/their relationship

okiedokie [cracks knuckles] i had a shower to wash away the sad and now i'm ready to write the good - this took a good while because i was watching a show while writing lol

this is going to be fluff, i'll find out if anything else happens while writing this. very minor angsty and nsfw mentions.

ashley

"i don't think i've ever loved anyone as much as i love ashley. i still get butterflies when i look at her."

you tossed your phone towards ashley so she could order pizza while you were busy writing an assignment on your laptop. when she unlocked it, the chat with your best friend was still open, your last text the one about ashley. "i didn't know you were a big ol' sap." ashley shifted on the couch and leaned her head against your shoulder. "huh?" you stopped typing and furrowed your brow. "what are you talking about?" - "oh, just that text about me you sent earlier." she was already scrolling through the menu, looking for your favourite pizza. "were you snooping?" - "i didn't have to. you never close your apps." you nodded your head. it was true, you never did. "i get butterflies, too. ever since we met. maybe we're soulmates." she leaned in to kiss you.

beth

"hannah, oh my god, i'm so happy to see you. did you know that i love beth soooooo much? she's the best. i want to marry her. do you think she would want to marry me?"

beth tried to interrupt your drunken ramblings. her twin sister was on the couch next to you, snoring, and you had woken up while she was trying to clear the empty pizza boxes from the coffee table. you had immediately pulled her into a tight hug and happily babbled on about beth for a minute until you fell asleep again. beth carefully removed herself from your arms and decided that she wasn't really in the mood to clean up after you and hannah, you were perfectly capable of doing that yourself in the morning. and she was only a little offended that you had mistaken her for her sister. it was kind of fun to know how you talked about her when you thought she wasn't there.

chris

"josh, chris just texted me 'can we talk?' and i am freaking out. is he breaking up with me? please tell me he's not breaking up with me. he's honestly the best boyfriend i've ever had and i-"

josh groaned. "i told him not to text you that. chris, what's wrong with you?" you heard some crinkling, the muffled sounds of josh and chris whispering and then what sounded like a slap before josh let you know that he was handing the phone over to chris now. "hey, sorry about that. josh's hand and the back of my head just had a meet and greet." - "good for you? what the fuck was that text about, chris?" more whispering. "chris?" - "yeah, sorry. so remember how you just said that i'm the best boyfriend ever?" you sighed. "looking back, i probably wouldn't have said it if i had known you were listening." chris cleared his throat. "well, actually, i was thinking that you're the best partner i've ever had and i wanted to ask you to move in with me and so i decided to send you a text to ask you to talk about it." - "can you actually put josh back on for a second?" whispering again, until you heard josh's voice. "what's up?" - "can you tell chris that i love him and will move in with him but that he seriously needs to work on the way he brings up serious topics?"

emily

"you might not like her but i love her. she's the best thing that ever happened to me and if you just bothered to get to know her, you'd know that she's actually smart and funny and great. she actually shows up for me, do you?"

emily knew that your family hated her. they saw her as a stuck-up mean girl with expensive tastes and were worried that she was just using you until someone better came along. she hated that her relationship with you was causing all these fights with your family because they thought they knew better. this was the worst fight you'd ever had with them and she'd never heard you yell like that. "no, i'm done talking. don't bother calling again until you accept that i'm an adult and make my own decisions." emily heard you swearing before you knocked on the bedroom door and walked in. you were half-dressed, the original plan had been to go out for dinner. emily was still sitting in front of her vanity, absent-mindedly twirling a blending brush between her fingers. your phone buzzed again. "i swear to god," you muttered through clenched teeth as you declined the call. "rain check?" emily asked, already putting away the brush and looking for her make up wipes. "please." she looked at you through the mirror. "i'm sorry for asking but i think i need help getting out of this dress." - "oh, so you're flirting with me? right now?" you couldn't help but smile. "if you want me to. or you could just tell me how smart and funny and great i am while i order dinner." - "i can do that."

hannah

"dear hannah, your glasses are very cute and look really good on you. you have a really pretty face and i have a crush on you."

"dear hannah, do you want to go out with me?"

"dear hannah, you were really good as juliet in the senior year play."

"oh my god, what's this?" hannah picked up the loose papers that had slid all over the wooden floor of the living room in your new apartment. "what? oh, oh no. i thought i'd thrown those away. they're so old." - "i didn't know you had a crush on me back in high school. wow, we really could have gotten together years ago." you were on your hands and knees, trying to grab the old, unfinished love letters you had never had the courage to slip into hannah's locker or bag. "what? you liked me in high school?" - "who did you think sent you all those valentines? i didn't know you liked my glasses back then." before long both of you were on the floor, reminiscing about all the near confessions you had accidentally dodged.

jess

"we'd love to go out for drinks with you guys, but i have plans with my super hot girlfriend and i wouldn't miss it for the world and she has plans with me. oops, putting our phones on do not disturb now."

you sent the text to the group chat and turned to jess. the two of you were on the couch, wearing sweatpants and facemasks. numerous candles were illuminating the living room and there was a romcom playing on the TV. "super hot girlfriend, is that right?" jess was smiling, the hydrating sheet mask wrinkling and folding around her mouth. "oh, very." you were sipping wine through a straw. "and you'd rather be at home doing skincare and watching a movie with me?" - "are you kidding me? i get to have a few drinks, hang out with my favourite person in the world AND wake up with great skin. what more could a person want?" - "you're not so bad yourself."

josh

"ugh, i know, right? he's smart, he's hot, he's kinda weird but in that cute and quirky way and when i look at him, i want to start writing poems or love songs. it's actually disgusting how perfect i think he is."

josh and you were at a bar with a group of friends and while josh had gone to get more drinks and a few others were playing pool, one of them had taken the opportunity to tease you about the way the two of you adored each other. neither of you didn't realise that josh was already on his way back to the table and heard every word you said. he stopped for a few seconds to compose himself, thinking that you'd probably be embarrassed if you knew that he heard you talking about him. the rest of the night, josh was in a, to you, inexplicably good mood but when you asked what had him smiling like that he said that he was just having fun. you narrowed your eyes and looked at him, suspiciously. "what did you do?" - "nothing, i swear." a few hours later you were on your way home, your hand in josh's while he was swinging them back and forth. "what is up with you today? i could pass out right here and now. how are you not tired?" josh's smile was as wide as ever. "it's nothing, really. i'm just happy i met you."

matt

"i wouldn't dream of breaking uncle matt's heart. pinkie promise. when we get married you can be flower girls."

matt's nieces had begged you to play tea party with them. they were extraordinarily good at offering you tea while giving you the third degree. yes, i love your uncle matt a lot. yes, i hope your uncle matt loves me, too. yes, we live together. no, i won't break up with uncle matt. you thought meeting matt's parents for the first time would be intimidating. his nieces were almost terrifying. finally, matt came to save you when they started asking about babies. you waved goodbye to the girls. "so it's when, not if we get married?" you looked at matt and your heart skipped a beat, he was smiling warmly. "well, i mean, i guess-" you sputtered. "wait, you were listening and you let them interrogate me?" - "oh, do you want to go back and tell them how many kids we're gonna have?"

mike

"yes, i know he's handsome. like absolute dreamboat, straight out of a disney movie handsome."

"oh, you better watch your mouth, that's my boyfriend you're talking about."

"oh no, he's an only child. but i think he has cousins. doubt he left any hot for the rest of them, though."

you hadn't heard mike come home and he was trying really hard to respect your privacy but the bedroom door was ajar and you were always louder when you were talking on the phone, especially when talking to your best friend whom he was due to meet this upcoming weekend. and he couldn't deny it, he was curious what you had to say about him. mike pushed the bedroom door open slowly, you had your back to him and were scrolling on your phone with your earphones in. "busy?" he asked, leaning against the doorframe and grinning widely when you jumped and almost tumbled off the bed. "what the fuck, mike? when did you get here?" you said a quick goodbye to your friend and put your phone on the bedside table. "oh, not that long ago." he crossed his arms, still grinning at you. "but go on, what were you saying about me?" mike inched towards the bed, his face now scrunched up in mock-confusion. "something about me being super hot, i think." - "i never said super hot." he put the back of his hand against his forehead and closed his eyes, feigning hurt this time. "you wound me." then, before you knew it, he was straddling you, his lips barely an inch from yours as he was running his hands down your sides, sending a pleasant shiver down your spine. "guess i'll have to change your mind, then."

sam

"my girlfriend just opened her own gallery and i'm super proud of her. do you have anything on the menu that's fancy and says 'i love you so much, you're gonna do great' and, most importantly, is also vegan? is champagne vegan? do you have vegan champagne?"

sam heard you whispering to the hostess as she walked through the doors behind you. so that's why you wanted her to park the car. she smiled at the hostess and rolled her eyes slightly, affectionately, pointed and you and then at herself while mouthing i'm the girlfriend. the hostess nodded and asked you to wait just a few more minutes, your table was almost ready. "you know i'm just a cog in the machine and the gallery isn't actually my own, right?" sam had sauntered over and was looking at you with one eyebrow raised in amusement. "you're still an active partner and the face of the gallery. so why bother explaining?" - "oh, i'm not complaining. just wondering if you hit your head. but now i don't feel bad about letting you wine and dine me."

[emmawithtwoms]

Potions Dungeon

@wolfstarmicrofic day 26 -831 words

Sirius Black had had many stupid ideas in his life: putting fairy dust in his mother’s tea, telling Snape about the secret passageway under the Whomping Willow, “accidentally” throwing a bludger at Slughorn during the last quidditch match… 

But choosing Remus Lupin as his potions partner during the lesson on Amortentia must have been the dumbest idea that had ever crossed his mind. 

To be fair, when they chose partners he did not know that they were going to brew love potions, but still, Morgana must have really hated him. 

All around him he could smell the scent of old books, earl grey tea, the Forbidden forest and fucking cinnamon. It was driving him insane. 

Padfoot could feel his palms sweating, his face blushing and his heart rushing, and why did nobody tell him of the arousing effect the vapors from Amortentia had? 

So he made a plan: he would not talk, think about or even look at Moony for the whole lesson. He would concentrate only on the potion, checking that the colour was right, that it was being turned the right amount of times, in the right direction and making sure that the right amount of ingredients was poured at the right moment and in the right way. Although it was Moony doing it, so it was hard ignoring his presence, his scent, and his hands… Merlin his hands, his beautiful, big, callous, scarred hands NO! He would not indulge in those thoughts. 

Sirius shook his head trying to remove everything regarding Remus and his hands from his head. Sadly, the other boy was not making it easy for Padfoot to ignore him. 

“Are you alright, Pads? You’ve been awfully quiet.” 

“Yeah, yeah, just… lost in my head a bit” 

Sirius kept pointedly not looking at Moony. The smell from all the Amortentia in the room was so strong and so enveloping that he was sure that if he had looked at Remus, he would have confessed eternal love. 

Remus placed a reassuring hand on his shoulder, trying to comfort him. 

“Is it because of your brother? If you need anything I am here, you know? Mulciber could “accidentally” drop a bit too much fairy dust and cause an explosion, accidentally ending the lesson earlier, you know?” 

Oh that beautiful, beautiful man, Sirius could melt because of him.

“No, I’m fine, really. I just can’t wait for this stupid lesson to be over. I fucking hate love potions.” 

“Oh. Yeah, I get it. And smelling this intensely the person you are in love with is very… distracting.”

Sirius finally lifted his gaze to look at Remus.

Right. The person you are in love with… he didn’t think about it, but surely Remus would smell someone too in the potion. Someone else. 

“Do you smell someone in particular, Moony?”

Please don’t, for the love of Merlin

“I… Yes I do.”

Those words stabbed Sirius right in the guts.

��Well, they must be very special to have you looking like that.”

Remus had a sad smile on his lips, like he resigned himself, like he felt hopeless. 

“Yes, he is.”

HE?

“I know he will never like me back, but I just can’t help it. He’s too important, too special. Even if he sometimes cannot see it, he is one of the best people I know.” 

“Don’t say that, Moons, everybody would be lucky to have you.” 

“Oh come on, you are my best friend, you have to say that.” 

“No, I’m serious, pun not intended. You are amazing Moony. You are kind, smart, brave, strong, funny and an evil mastermind. And honestly, you are rather beautiful, so if he can’t see it, sorry but he’s just not worth your time.” 

Remus stared at him in disbelief. The hand that was still on his shoulder tightened, his eyes glistened and he opened his mouth like he wanted to say something, and Sirius, just for a second, indulged in the fantasy of a heartwarming love confession. 

But they were rudely interrupted by Slughorn, who announced the end of the lesson, and all the students hurried to bring samples of their potions to his desk, including Moony. 

While leaving the potions dungeon to head to dinner, though, Remus called Sirius back, leaving them behind from the group. 

“Pads, thank you for what you said earlier, you… you are really special.” 

Remus was not looking at him in the eyes and picking at his cuticles. 

“Moons, that was just the truth. Stop doing that with your fingers, you’ll hurt your hands.”

And without thinking about it, he took Remus’ hand in his and smiled at him, and he just… didn’t let go. Not until they reached the Great Hall, and not while they were eating, still with their pinkies intertwined during dinner, and not while climbing the stairs back to their common room. 

They both knew that they should have talked about it, but for now, for now it was fine just like that. 

[konuxkii]

UNSPOKEN RULES — SANZU HARUCHIYO

🍥 ₊‧ rivalry, hatred, and sharp words—that’s how things have always been between you and Sanzu. But as time goes on, those unspoken rules start to shift, and the lines between enemy and something else blur. There’s something else beneath that hate—a tension that neither of you can deny, though neither is willing to admit it.

WARNINGS : it's sanzu- he needs his own warning tbh, mild language, rivalry, mutual pinning, implicit flirting, kanto manji arc

PAIRINGS : sanzu haruchiyo x gn!reader

WORDCOUNT : 585

m.list

The first time you crossed paths with Sanzu Haruchiyo, the air had crackled with a mix of disdain and challenge. You had always been on opposite sides—different feelings, different ideologies. He'd looked at you with that arrogant smirk of his, his sharp eyes glinting as though he already knew he could break you. And yet, somehow, you never backed down.

It wasn’t just the rivalry—it was something in the way he made you feel. Every interaction, every snide comment, every insult, it was like a spark igniting in your chest. You hated him, and yet, there was something about him that drew you in. Something dangerously magnetic.

"Still pretending you’re important?" he’d taunted last week, his voice dripping with sarcasm. You hadn’t even flinched. You didn’t need to. But the way his gaze lingered on you, just for a moment too long, made your heart race in a way you didn't want to acknowledge.

Today, it was no different. You stood across from him, facing off in the midst of a tense meeting between Kanto Manji’s factions. He leaned casually against the wall, arms crossed, eyes scanning the room but always drifting back to you.

"Didn't expect to see you again so soon," Sanzu said, his voice smooth, his lips curling into a half-smile. It was always that smile—half teasing, half mocking—that made it impossible to tell if he was genuinely amused or if he was baiting you. Probably both.

You kept your composure. "You're the one who keeps showing up wherever I go like some lost dog."

"Maybe I like the view," he quipped, and this time, his eyes were uncomfortably focused on you.

For a second, you felt the familiar rush of heat in your chest, the same heat that made you grit your teeth and clench your fists. Your rivalry had always been sharp, but lately, it felt… different. The tension was thicker, heavier. It wasn’t just about whatever was going on between you two in Kanto Manji anymore. It was about something else—something neither of you wanted to admit.

"Quit looking at me like that," you snapped, trying to ignore the sudden flutter in your stomach as you looked away from him, god you hated that fucking smirk. "We're not friends, Sanzu."

His gaze darkened, but his grin never wavered. “I didn’t say we were.”

You hated how much you wanted him to say more. How much you wished the words would slip from his lips—the words you both knew were hovering between you, yet neither of you could speak.

Silence stretched out. The room felt too small, the space between you and him charged with unspoken words. The way he was standing—almost like he was waiting for something, like he was testing you—made your pulse quicken. You weren’t sure if he was trying to get under your skin, or if it was something deeper, something rawer than either of you had ever allowed to surface.

"You know, it's funny," Sanzu said after a moment, his tone now quieter, almost thoughtful. "For all the hate you throw my way… you never seem to really mean it."

Your breath hitched, but you recovered quickly, forcing a mocking laugh. "That's rich, coming from you."

He didn’t laugh. He didn’t even smile. He just took a step closer, his eyes locking onto yours with an intensity that made it hard to breathe, as if the two of you were the only ones in the room.

"Maybe I don't mean it either."

The words hung in the air like a challenge—and a promise.

Oh, how you hated him.

@konuxkii 2024 kalli notes : (please tag me in any sanzu fic) I had the sudden burst of motivation to write again soo, with my ever going obsession with Sanzu..who better to write for? Expect more with him honestly. I'm not sure if I wanted to make this a series so for now it's a drabble!! REQUESTS OPEN!!

[kwamiwayzz]

Jeckole Yapping

Had to dig through my old posts to find the template, but I'm bored and doing this again but for Jecka and Nicole this time. Mostly headcanons and such below

__

• When or if I started shipping it:

I'm going to be honest, but I don't remember. I only got into Co09 a few months ago. All I know is that once I watched the out of context videos on Class of '09 and Re-Up, I wanted more content of them and came across a lot of really good fanart and fanfic.

I think there were a lot of boxes checked off when I slowly went down the rabbit hole lol. There's an emotionally constipated dark-girl paired with a preppy blonde girl who acts as the former's foil. I think what really drew me into them, fanart aside, were the foils and parallels between them. The codependency, expanded upon by Progman, was probably the final nail that dragged me down the brainrot.

• My thoughts:

I've known about them for awhile, and thought they were some random white girls in a cult classic VN that somehow regained a surge of popularity last year. I didn't know the VN was relatively new, and most of the time when I do ship Jeckole, it's without the creator in mind. They have a certain flavor to them that hits in a way where I can't stop brainrotting over them.

Someone mentioned this in a fic comment, but they see them as foils when it comes to dealing with people and the world around them--where Nicole acts as this snarling animal that will bite you if you get too close, while Jecka acts as this wall that doesn't allow things to get to her even if it does bother her. In a way, they envy each other for that, and after reading that fic it reinforced why their dynamic is one that I gravitate towards compared to the others. They have pieces of each other that they're missing and they can't live without the other (I love codependent Jeckole).

• What makes me sad about them:

In-game, they probably wouldn't last after high school when they go their separate ways. As much as Nicole sees Jecka as a slightly more "special" person to her than most people at the school, their friendship is more for convenience--with Nicole finding Jecka to be more tolerable and cool compared to everyone else (along with the added bonus of not being a loner), and Jecka finding Nicole more fun to hang around with than all her other school friends despite knowing how much Nicole is a fucked up mess and bad influence. In-game Nicole is also someone who would continue to keep everyone at an arm's length and also wouldn't fight too hard (outside of the Jecka and counselor smoking scene) to maintain any meaningful relationships once they're out of her reach.

But also, who cares what the creator thinks because fanart and fanfic exists lmaoooooo.

• What makes me happy about them:

There's a scene in Flip Side where Nicole calls Jecka first thing in the morning at 7am asking her where McDonald's keeps their frozen patties, only for Jecka to say they don't have them because McD serves breakfast during those hours. Then Jecka calls Nicole stupid, and I just found that scene funny in an oddly comforting way.

Nicole is comfortable enough to bug Jecka and wake her up so early in the morning for something so mundane, while Jecka just stays on the phone listening to whatever antics she's in instead of hanging up immediately and going back to bed. I also mentioned this in another post, but someone on Twitter said the thing they love most about Jeckole is how Nicole was willing to get to know Jecka even after saying she has no desire to make any connections at her new school. It can be interpreted as a convenience thing on Nicole's end, but every route in the original game has her willing to either ask for Jecka's name or share her name when they first meet.

To me, their back and forth dynamic keeps them balanced enough to stay fucked up with the potential of becoming well-adjusted in the future.

• Things done in art/fic that annoys me:

There's a number of interpretations when it comes to the Co09 characters, so I understand it can be hard to write them. But for me personally, I'm not a fan of when Nicole is depicted as either way too nice and uncharacteristically soft or way too mean and following the stereotypical SBN interpretation that "Nicole doesn't give a shit about anyone or anything".

• Things I look for in art/fic:

When they're codependent :) or when they're codependent with a slight chance of them getting healthier over time. Also, just them being stupid together.

I'm also one of the few people (I haven't come across too many others yet) that seek out future Jeckole stuff. Whenever I picture them as adults, it's always aurawra21's art in mind.

• Who I’d be comfortable them ending up with, if not each other: 

I'm a monoshipper when it comes to Class of '09, so probably no one. It adds to that codependent flavor :) but if you want a real answer...

For Nicole, probably Emily.

For Jecka, probably Emily also.

• My happily ever after for them:

Moving out of their town, healing from their trauma, and getting healthier over time. Maybe they won't be better people exactly, but they'd at least be less fucked up and a little happier (with Nicole finding some will to keep living past 30) after cutting off their toxic families.

• What is their favorite activity?: 

Nicole forcing Jecka to watch Mythbusters and How It's Made with her (in exchange for watching Smallville and Charmed with Jecka). Also, probably smoking together, assuming that Jecka hasn't quit her smoking habit ten years later.

[chasedeys]

https://www.tumblr.com/chasedeys/768170997377597440/httpswwwtumblrcomchasedeys768169507136159744

Omg you’re so right I’ve noticed that he’s very careful with his words when talking about Ja’Marr and I think that’s so telling like on one hand he is not playing into the media leading questions, and ok the other he wants to keep as much of their priceless relationship to himself

he doessss!!!! to be fair he always chooses his words carefully for all his interview questions that's why he usually takes notable pauses in between the words of all his answers. it always makes me laugh when the nfl/bleacherreport/bengals post clips of his interview they have to trim the dead silence in between his sentences 😭 incredibly precious of him btw

completely drained from the last ask so i can't be assed to actually link these sorry but i really want to list some moments out :') :

he always stutters (?) or like talks haltingly about ja'marr and their connection like he's choosing his words very carefully and deliberately. like think of that interview with ryan clark on his connection with ja'marr or that insane one with joe montana about finding that one special wr or smtg crazy like that or that podcast one where his hair was so fucking perfect and he talked about ja'marr being open etc etc god my brain is too fried for this sorry. oh and that panthers presser where joe laughed and said he likes watching ja'marr play!!! grauaghghhg.

ja'marr's rookie preseason drops, he said he knows the type of guy ja'marr is the kind of player he is despite all his drops. ja'marr gets his first touchdown and joe storms the field to get to him and hug his ass like they're in a romcom idk. the post game presser he makes it clear he remembers all the shit they said about ja'marr 'i thought he was dropping everything'.

this preseason getting constantly asked about ja'marr's contract and him not practicing at all. he gives pr answers sure but you can see he was 100% firm when he says ja'marr would be ready regardless and i think he also mentioned about throwing with him outside of practice?? cute! absolutely devastating for me but cute!!

the 'there’s a whole lot of ways a receiver can tell you hey get me the fucking ball' 😭 somebody wrote a headline like 'ja'marr chase question causes joe burrow to cuss for the first time during press' or something like that and i just about died 😭 kinda clickbaity but honestly it’s soooo funny of course ja’marr would be involved somehow. that presser he was off he was weirdly open?? and teasing??? and when he talked about ja'marr he still took his time to choose his words but he was a whole lot looser on the tongue than usual so boom he drops the f bomb to the shock of every single person who watches his shit.

i cant really think of anything else lmao and this isn't really in line with list sort of but i remember him getting asked about him and ja'marr or pat and travis LMAOOOOOOOO truly why would they ask him this but his voice got so?? fuck it was so????? he 100% tripped up never in my life have i seen him get so flustered and giggly and weirdly defensive. saying something along the lines of 'what do you want me to say? course I'm gonna say us (him and ja'marr) like they (travpat) would answer them' but he was soooo ???? blushy about it???? and like scrunching his entire body in that chair?????? insane man tbh. pr answer ofc but the way he answered it was giving new couple getting asked about how they got together idk. AND LIKE if you compare this with ja'marr getting asked about him and joe or josh allen and stefon diggs (😭😭 bless you all get to a point in your life that you get so close to a someone people know you as a duo instead of just a singular person that you get asked these type of questions) and he calmly without missing a beat rationally straight-faced-ly said that 'i like us more than anybody'........fuck them both so muchhhhh shut uppp 😭

ok bye :')

[paper-possum-party-pal]

Guess Who?

It’s Timekeeper!!!

Timekeeper started off as an AI The Narrator made to keep track of settings and time after a failed attempt to create a protagonist. A form was built, but was scrapped. When TK gained sentience, he didn’t have the power to do much except mess with the clock and settings. She slowly expanded her power though through the powerful desire to fuck with The Narrator. They weren’t aware of much going on outside of their space until connecting with the computers of the parable where they became aware of Stanley. Xe gains access to the time and space between resets where Xe starts interacting with Stanley and the become partners in crime.

Stanley and TK are great buddies and their favorite activity is messing with The Narrator, made funnier by the fact The Narrator has no clue TK is even there. He does eventually find out though once TK manages to pull its scrapped form out of recycling and fix it and gets caught interacting with Stanley. Stanley and TK also often talk about their false memories and what kinds of lives they would lead in the real world. TK doesn’t really care if he gets to experience the real world, but does admit that it might be fun, and new things means new ideas means new ways to prank The Narrator.

The Narrator and TK have more of a rivalry, with TK thinking The Narrator as a stuck up buzzkill who puts too much value in perfection and meaning, while The Narrator thinks TK is annoying, irresponsible, and irreverent. They aren’t really friends, but they’re not enemies either, and will reluctantly admit when the other may have a point. They’re sort of like roommates and maybe siblings.

TK doesn’t interact with The Curator or Mariella as much, but they’re friends. TK knows how and when to bring the fun to them and they both appreciate it. They all hold more of a sibling dynamic. They all have tea together, chat, and play fight, especially TK and Mariella. The Curator is great at reigning in TK, which can be frustrating when a certain someone starts whining about someone else messing with his game.

More human form

It’s funny to me how many of us, at least initially (and even a little bit now), had a similar idea of how Timekeeper would look with a physical form. I found myself having a lot of difficulty deciding what I wanted them to look like exactly since there’s so many creative designs people have come up with. I was thinking of trying to design a very non-human form for it. One thing that does slightly bother me is that I have that last character for the proctor lineup that is very similar looking, but I’m hoping it’s just different enough so it doesn’t feel too much like I’m copy pasting the same character.

With white background

[hyperions-light]

ssssshhhhh this is a reference post for future me bc I have 12 billion ideas a day and my brain is filled with bees + some wasps

- The Lore did not change in VG at all, what in the world is everyone talking about

- It’s all one blood magic ritual, guys, trust me

- Solas, Bellara, and the arrogance of self-blame

- the one about how I never want to revisit the mage-Templar conflict ever again

- My fucking husband Zevran Arainai and why we’ll probably never see him again =(

- Just a list of references in this game to the past ones, since everyone keeps saying it’s ’not a real DA game’

- Another, more helpful list of all the NPCs whose dialogue will change if you bring specific companions to them

- Posting things I love about Bellara, because she’s not getting enough adoration

- Posting things I love about Harding, since she isn’t either

- Posting about Taash + their arc, since people don’t like it

- Posting about how I love the stuff Rook can say to Solas in the ending because I’m obsessed with the last 10-ish min of the game

- Posting about all the ways the game characterizes Rook, since people are mad about that too

-Posting about Emmrich’s arc and how like… it’s fun but really it’s also very serious and thematically relevant

- Posting about how Veilguard confronts and deals with death

- Posting about Neve in a more coherent way lol (after I try saving Minrathous)

- Spite and the Ossuary, since people hate that too I guess

- Posting abt how BW games have almost always just offered the illusion of carrying choices over and I’m glad they stopped lying about it (NOTIFS OFF)

- The Crows in VG (notifs off again)

- Countering some specific complaints about the LoF w/ regards to how they relate to Isabela (notifs REALLY off)

- Do I seriously need to discuss Isseya a third time

- something about how Davrin is like… he’s like good Ghilan’nain or something… he cares about them… idk

- What’s going on with Rook de Riva and Vi (after I finish this playthrough)

- those elven pantomime mask mementos… fascinating

- Paragon Wintersbreath?????

- love how normal everyone in Minrathous is

- Confused about the anger towards [im redacting this] when Dorian codex, Viper, etc, + other games never discussed anyway??

- How specific criticisms of DAI clearly shaped this game and it’s funny bc now everyone is mad that they listened to the criticisms (only if I’m feeling confrontational)

[aves-rook-laidir]

Here are my live notes that i typed out on the Sticker App while playing the game for the first time. - MAJOR SPOILERS -

They are slightly out of order because I was just jumping in typing wherever:

Holy shit it’s on TWO DISCS?!!?

Not me staring at the press any button screen for ages

I like that Neve is like Cassandra, your no 1

Davrin Rook bonded so fast because they were immediately thrown into a dragon battle together and it got really tough real quick

Did Gilhanain just say YOUR BLOOD KNOWS YOU’LL DIE HERE?

Absolutely loved bringing harding as the extra companion, she’s just so exasperated by it all

I do feel like the va tone didn’t always fit with certain more serious situations.

Staring at Solas in photomode, so mixed emotions, mostly exasperation.

So what was he doing at the strart? Putting evanuris in a stronger prison, then tearing down the veil, or? Because if he was just putting them in a new prison, and exlained himself to Varric non of this would be happening.

God damn, someone ask Morrigan about the fith blight, actually, is it even public record who journeyed with the Warden? Was it kept hush hush?

Can wardens still hear the calling if all the high dragons are awakend? Whos calling them in the deep roads?

I wonder if Davrin has a hard time talking about the elven god reveal because he has a special relationship with Halla and Ghilanain was the god of Halla? 

Oh, why would we have Varric's shaving mirror?

Lucanis so fucking weird haha

Davrin - “Couldn’t have asked for a better day” Rook immediately, ungracefully slides down a cliff

Emmrich is making a mistake, why would he want to be immortal, like look at these three imortal clowns running around.

Ok so The Ancient Elves were spirits who took physical forms using the lyrium, which is the blood of the ancient titans, They became the first mages? This caused a war between the elves and the titans

I wish they had shown more of Emmrich getting her out of the fade, because that is his very specific skill, like all the attention Lucanis got about using the dagger, to cement Emrrich's role in all this, I wanna see him being a badass in a direct story point.

The Butcher was scarier than Elghanan, should not have been,

Elghanan should have been wayyyy scarier, less talking.

“The gods they give strength but all they ask in return is everything” dope

Literally fuck off no scene getting her out of the fade, her reacting to getting out, the grief? The Relief? Helo?

“Though Harding also told me” LMAO Emmrich

I feel like it makes more sense for Harding to sneak up on Ghillie, This is her moment, tragic because we’ve seen her whole journey. Harding saying ‘should I take the shot’ at the start of the game then taking guaranteeing Ghilanains death with her simple bow and arrow. and to have this little dreamless thing, created out of the desicrated titans be the last thing she sees, fuck yes.

The first thing they did was retrieve all the bodies. They found Harding and Leliana and the Inquisitor brought her back to her village

Solas: How did you even get out of the fade? Rook: gestures vaguely to Emmrich standing behind her ‘He knows more about the fade than you.'

I wish there was a bit more dialogue with Dorian at the end, saying ‘Do it for Varric and or Harding, won’t you? They were just so…oh, you…know...’

Taash everyone I loves dies NONONO I love you!

‘Everything dies, its what they do’ Including imortal gods

Is solas fucking losing??? fucks sake cant even do one thing

Solas assisting the Shadow Dragons at the end paint a funny picture, like, imaging Dorain trying to evacuate the city and Solas is just also there, after like 10 years. How did that reunion go?

It had to be bellara that got blighted, those gods were hers, that history is hers, and she's just so innocent, it was a great character arc

me the whole time 'its fine just go grey warden'

Shaved her head after coming out the fade to feel something

What if it’s not enough? What if it is?

I really though time travel was going to be a thing, after the dorian stuff?

Leo represent my Inky because in my AU she is too weak to travel as the mark is still sucking the life out of her, arm or no arm, but she dragged her ass up for that final scene with Solas. Leli and Josie spread a misinformation campaign around thedas, so unless you meet them directly its really hard to know if Inky is a female Elf, Male Human, and whoever else.

I hope Morrigan is ok

[nightmare-foundation]

The Academies are based on and named after things Oz values.

Beacon- Beacons of hope

Haven- safe havens

Atlas- symbols of innovation, protection from darkness, a light in the dark

Shade- protection from harsh light and heat

[linktoo-doodles]

I feel loved

Happy Birthday, Ritsu.

[mattodore]

birthday boy 🎂