#bllk fic
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i know who my first call will be to — sae misses home more than he thought he would
Itoshi Sae’s heart stays behind in Spain whenever he leaves for overseas matches.
An absurd notion, most certainly. Ridiculous, in every sense that exists to the word. So unbelievable, in fact, that he still has a hard time believing it himself.
Nevertheless, it remains the only explanation behind the ache in his chest whenever he goes to sleep in an empty hotel bed. It’s why his meal times are dull and monotonous; why he finds himself pushing past his bedtime to remain glued to his phone, listening to you recounting your day.
Sae isn’t sure if you know it — how he desperately yearns to remain by your side. And if you do, you’re good at hiding it (he likes to think it’s for his sake).
His grip on his phone tightens just enough, a soft hum rumbling in his throat as he absentmindedly agrees with something you said.
When you lean closer to the screen, Sae nuzzles into his pillow, holding it tight as he pretends it’s you instead. You cup your chin with your hand, looking away as you trail off mid-sentence.
“I miss you,” he says, quiet and soft and so, so unlike himself, filling the faintest gap of silence.
Your eyes flit back, meeting his own through the screen. Sae has to strain to catch the soft exhale that leaves your lips. Then, you smile — gentle and (somehow) pitying at the same time.
“You’ll be home soon enough,” you say, your tone full of warmth.
“I want to be home now,” he replies, almost petulant as the pillowcase slightly muffles his words. His gaze softens when you do. “I miss you.”
“I miss you, too,” you whisper, lightly poking the camera in a manner that has him instinctively scrunching up his nose. You tilt your head to the side, studying half of his face as best you can through a phone.
“My flight back is on Saturday,” Sae says, studying your face in return.
“I know. Want me to pick you up?”
“I land around midnight,” he mumbles. “I don’t want to keep you up—”
“Sae.”
The tips of his ears burn, embarrassment painting his cheeks red when your eyes meet. After a beat, he huffs in complaint, his brows furrowing. Still, your gaze softens; and he melts almost instantly.
He sniffles, lightly shifting onto his side. “I want you to pick me up from the airport,” he clarifies, trying to will a little firmness into his voice.
“Hm,” there’s a fuzzy feeling in his chest, fluttering and clinging to every corner at your soft hum. It further roots itself into him when you grin. “I’ll think about it.”
“What’ll it take for you to say yes?” he asks, trying to bite back a smile. He nuzzles into his pillow when you lean back, pretending to be deep in thought.
God, he misses you so bad. He misses being near you with every bone in his body.
“A kiss, maybe. If you want.”
Sae rolls his eyes, fondness buzzing in his chest. “I thought you were going to be more ambitious than that.”
You shrug, nonchalant, “I’ll max out your card when you get home.”
“Mm.” Sae rolls onto his other side, switching his phone to his free hand. “That sounds more like you,” he mumbles, soft.
The corners of his eyes crinkle when you guffaw, quickly defending yourself against his claim. His expression softens impossibly so — he’s sure the press would have a field day if they saw him like this. (Part of him thinks he wouldn’t care if they did; you’re the reason behind it, anyway).
“I wanna go home.”
“You’re staying in France for, like, two more days. You’ll be fine, Sae.”
He rolls his eyes, picking at the edges of his phone case. “Have you washed the bedsheets yet?”
“Yesterday,” you reply, absentminded. “Why?”
“Just wondering,” Sae murmurs, hushed. “Did you use the detergent I like?”
“Yeah?”
He makes a soft noise, “I hope you know I’m collapsing on our bed when I get home.”
“I don’t—”
“And I’m bringing you down with me.”
A soft, amused huff leaves his lips at your expression. His eyes narrow just a little, the action fond and affectionate in nature. When you sputter, Sae scrunches up his nose. He wishes he could kiss the frown off your lips.
“Whatever,” you grumble, softly clicking your tongue. “You’re lucky I miss you.”
“I miss you more,” Sae whispers, soft and gentle and so, so unlike himself. He supposes his demeanor is your fault — his heart turned to mush the moment he gave it to you. The thought is stupid and utterly asinine, truly.
Still, Sae doesn’t mind. He believes it more and more, letting it take root in his soul every time you brighten up at his tender, ‘I love you’s.
#I WANT TO GO HOME PLEASE SOMEBODY SAVE ME I HATE COLLEGE#JUST TAKE ME HOME#can you tell i miss my home .#bllk x reader#sae x reader#blue lock x reader#bllk x you#blue lock x you#bllk sae#bllk scenarios#bllk itoshi sae#bllk imagines#bllk fluff#bllk fic#bllk fanfic#sae itoshi x reader#itoshi sae x reader#sae x you#blue lock sae#itoshi sae#itoshi sae x you#blue lock itoshi sae
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perv nagi is a FReak
perv isagi | perv barou | perv shidou
--
“Are you done yet?”
“Nagi! Stop complaining,” you laugh. “Almost, just relax.”
“I’ve been relaxing for the past 45 minutes.”
You simply wave his complaints off, brushing some kind of powder on your face.
Nagi plops back down on your bed, scrolling through his phone like he’s been ever since he showed up on time to pick you up for Reo’s party.
He only survives another minute or so before sitting up again. “Are you ready now…”
The words die on his lips when he sees you.
Your teeth are showing as you bite down and chew on your bottom lips. After a couple of tugs, you arch you back to lean forward, lips pursed as you run a tube of gloss over the reddened skin. He watches – stares – as you deposit one big teardrop of gloss on your lips, using the applicator to swipe it across your top lip before smacking them together to transfer to your bottom lips. His eyes zero in on your movements when the applicator roams over your lips again, top and bottom this time.
His whole body goes stiff when your mouth opens up into a small “O” and your applicator comes away, the tacky residue making a quiet popping noise. One single strand of clear fluid connects your lips and the tube and it’s only a fleeting moment but it hypnotizes him and the moment feels like hours.
“-gi. Nagi!”
He snaps out of it, sitting straight up and realizing he had subconsciously hunched over to cover up.
“I’m ready. What do you think?” you ask.
You stand up to give him a full body view of your outfit, but he’s unable to tear his eyes away from your swollen lips and their shiny coating. He knows he needs to respond, but nothing comes out.
It’s only when you turn to go into the bathroom that he registers what you’re saying, something about washing your hands before leaving.
Nagi’s eyes swoop to the tube of gloss sitting down on the table.
He doesn't think as it finds its way into his hands and his fingers are unscrewing the cap. He stares at the sticky surface, images of your kiss on it still flashing in his mind.
Before he knows what he’s doing, he brings the tube up and presses it flat against his tongue, tasting it. It’s bland and gluey, as he suspected it may be, but something must be wrong with him because he swears he can taste you on it.
#noos writes#blue lock fic#bllk fic#blue lock x y/n#blue lock x you#blue lock x reader#bllk x y/n#bllk x you#bllk x reader#nagi seishiro#nagi x reader#nagi x you#nagi x y/n#nagi seishiro x reader#nagi seishiro x you
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your lips my lips, apocalypse | blue lock
characters: michael kaiser x fem!reader contents: fluff, sliiightly suggestive, petnames, cussing, implied fake dating and hints of enemies to lovers, ooc kaiser prolly, reader used to be a sports journalist a/n: tryna be as canon-compliant as possible to mindy lore hehe 1k wc | requested!
the sound of the door banging against the wall echoes through the break room, your rapid footsteps padding across the floor as another pair of legs follows behind, the latter more leisurely, almost bored than most.
you make a beeline towards one of the lounge chairs and start gathering your belongings you’d left there to shove them into your bag, agitation dripping off from your movements.
“care to share what i did wrong this time, angel?”
another rush of anger courses through you and you throw the man a sideway glare, full of animosity and all malice. “don’t fucking call me that, and you know fully well what was wrong. that interview went to shit, kaiser.” you fume as you sling your bag over your shoulder, having felt enough of today’s shit show as you head back towards the door.
kaiser grabs a hold on your wrist, stopping you in your tracks. “hey - hey, calm down. i told you i’m sorry, okay? it wasn’t my fault that the journalist was fucking persistent in proving our relationship wrong. which it is, but still—” he stops talking when he sees that your glare has only intensified, both palms coming up to face you in mock surrender as a hint of that stupid grin curls on his lips.
an ugly, wicked snake of scaled emotions slithers in your mind. you wanted to argue more, to put the blame on someone else, to validate yourself for feeling like this. but you understand where the pesky lady came from, more or less. as a former journalist yourself, you know how demanding the job is and every little crumb of information is like finding an oasis in the middle of the sahara.
you turn your face away, hiding the way your expression visibly hardens. “that doesn’t mean you could just let her disrespect me like that,” you seethe quietly, clenching your fists. the frustration inside you only grows as you think back to the incident that had happened less than an hour prior. you were only one second away from refuting all the claims and accusations, about to whack the journalist in the face, even. but someone just had to butt in.
you see his hand reaching up from the corner of your eye, and soon enough, kaiser has your face held in his tattooed hand, fingers gently pressing on the side of your jaws so that you’re back to looking at him in the eye.
a pair of cerulean orbs greets you, the carmine lining just below each of his eyes further accentuating his alluring charm. kaiser smiles, tight and close-lipped as he tilts your head slightly upwards to face him properly. “considering we were in public, schatz, i dealt with her accordingly, no?” he drawls, and you bite down on the inside of your lip from the way the endearment pleasingly rolls in his mother tongue. “now how about we talk about that kiss we had before we left the conference hall.”
you freeze for a second then, a mild sense of dread washing over you at the sudden reminder of that awkward, pathetic excuse of a kiss you’d given him. “kaiser—” you move to pull away but he clicks his tongue and tightens his grip, nails digging into your skin to hold you in place. “ah, ah, eyes on me, princess. you wanna explain to me what that was all about?”
kaiser’s eyes are automatically drawn to the crimson shade rushing to your cheeks as he indulges himself with the warm sensation underneath his touch, noting how your eyes stay strayed away from his. when you give him no reply, he lets out a feigned and defeated sigh before speaking, “you’d have to try harder if we want this to work, you know? no more of that shy and embarrassed behavior you got going on.” your scowl returns, “i was not being shy—”
“say,” the man interjects, causing you to pause. “how about a quick practice?” he proposes.
the question registers a little bit too late in your brain before you stammer, “w-what? practice… kissing?” kaiser’s eyes squint slightly, lit with a certain twinkle you don’t bother to name. “yes, mein liebling. kissing practice. with me.”
once again you’re reduced to a speechless state, salacious images of panting breaths and locking lips flooding into your mind. seemingly aware of your internal conflict, a knowing smirk appears on his face. “why the hesitation, hm? you scared?”
“e-excuse me? i’m not scared, especially not of you, shitty emperor! it’s just - ugh, you know what? fine!” you finally relent as heat creeps up your neck, not realizing that a petulant pout has formed on your plush lips which is a sight that the striker all too greedily feast on. “but only because we have a front to keep up,”
the next thing you know, kaiser’s lips crash against yours, muffling the surprised gasp that he elicits from you. the tattooed hand that he had previously used to grip your cheeks snakes lower on your sides, pulling you closer so that your body curves into his own. the vehement heat he emits against you feels familiar, like puzzle pieces slotting in place as he keeps a solid hold on the curve of your hips with both of his hands, dangerously close to grabbing your ass.
there’s something fiery and addicting in the kiss, explosive shockwaves bursting in your tummy as your lips messily slide against his in a tandem. “mihya—” you shakily whine into his mouth, hands gripping and crumpling the button-down shirt he had been wearing for the interview as cobalt strands softly brush against your skin.
he pulls away slightly with a raspy chuckle, “there you go, mein schatz. i was worried you’d forgotten my name or something,” his voice lowers a tone, dripping with a honeyed amusement that has your knees almost buckling at the sound.
your mind turns hazy, unable to decide whether you want to give him a smack or kiss him silly. or both.
once again frustrated at yourself, you pull him down by the collar of his shirt and grunt just a breath away from his mouth, “let me practice more, asshole.” kaiser smirks wider, the blue flame of his irises burning with a desire to devour you whole.
“anything for my empress,”
@maruflix @pixelcafe-network @justwinginglife @lumiambrose @17020 @bgyuus @stunies @strawchocoberry
©🅁🅈🄴🅂🄲🄰🄿🄰🄳🄴🅂. do not steal, translate or repost my work anywhere else !
#did i overdo with the petnames 🧍#i feel like i did#but oh well#blue lock#bllk#bllk x reader#bllk x you#blue lock x reader#blue lock imagines#michael kaiser#michael kaiser x reader#michael kaiser x you#michael kaiser x y/n#bllk scenarios#bllk kaiser#blue lock fluff#blue lock fic#bllk fluff#bllk fic#divider by anitalenia on tumblr!#🥣 rye works
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*♡∞:。.。 Just a Nap 。.。:∞♡*
➶ bllk's Sae, Kaiser, Rin, and Shidou and their goofy selves try to make you prove your love
➶ they fake sleep and you carry them back to bed
➶ poll results. cw: cussing. insults. implied fem reader
𓅪 first bllk fic lesgoo
𓅪 this took three polls. THREE.
��� 𝑙𝑜𝑎𝑑𝑖𝑛𝑔 𝑑𝑎𝑡𝑎... ⋙
Sae Itoshi's
Each tick of the clock, each breath from your lips, each blink of your eye— you watched Sae's sleeping presence. He looked so peaceful you didn't dare disturb him, no matter how much of a trouble maker you were to him. There was something so off and comforting about his shallow breaths, in comparison to his usual stoic attitude, the one that pushes you away. But you stay anyway.
And he thinks he's such a little trickster.
Sae's eyelids flutter to to take a peek at what you were doing, his breathing shallow and soft to make the act convincing. Of course he's fake sleeping. He would never fall asleep in front of you.
He flinches. No, he doesn't jump, but he internally flinches when you attempt to stand him up from the couch, his one arm flung over your shoulder. It was one hell of a movie night, but every movie you watched was plain trash.
He could've spent the night practicing, yeah, but who was he to turn you down? All that's in his head now is fuck, fuck, fuck, I need to wake up—
— but everything's too good. He needs to know what happens next.
You struggled to lift him up. What was he, double your weight? You were tiny compared to this man, what the hell were you thinking trying to get him up? With a groan, you stand up, your weak knees trembling as you lift one side of his body, the other side hanging. But you notice he was on his feet. Maybe it was a reflex.
"Alrighty, let's get ya to bed," You say more to yourself than to him, each step excrutiatingly slow. Slow and shaky, your breath more ragged than his. Why were you even putting in this much effort?Effort wasted. Because you throw him onto the bed, hands on your knees as you panted. You thought he was a light sleeper, initially.
Vulnerability wasn't something he usually showed, yet here he was now, spread eagle on his twin-sized bed, hair in his face and his arm red from your tight hold. You did have a harder time.
And that's why you hated, hated him for opening his left eye, and he had his lips in a smug little smirk, that shitty bastard. You grumbled, throwing a pillow at him.
"What's wrong? You're surprisingly strong, y'know," He remarks, sitting up to fix his hair. Sae ran his fingers through the magenta strands, his eyes looking tired but accomplished.
"Lose some weight so I can carry you next time." You muttered angrily, sulky as you sat on the edge of his bed. "There's a next time?" He slips himself down the bed to sit next to you, gauging your reaction. And that goddamn smirk is still on his face, to the point where it seems his eyes are smirking, his ears are smirking, his cheeks, too. So annoying.
"Hopefully..."
"Not,"
"Yes,"
"No,"
"..."
"Fine." He eventually sighs. "I'll come over again, pendejo."
Michael Kaiser's
It was the first time you ever saw him asleep. Of course you wouldn't know this grown ass man still takes naps in the afternoon. The sun was up and blazing, glazing its color on Kaiser's undershirt, his muscles bare and exposed. You've never seen him like this, vulnerable, not teasing you, not absolutely annoying you. It was comforting in a way.
But Kaiser thinks he's such a clever man. He stifles a laugh, sensing how you're admiring his sleeping form, his fake sleeping form. He's supposed to be practicing with some people today, but he chooses to mess with you over anything else. It's just how he shows his love.
So it surprises him, really, when you start to stand up and grab his waist and back, supporting his body as much as you could. Were you really going to take him to his room? He lets out an audible groan, but keeps his eyes closed for convincing effect.
With every step you take, he drags his feet across the wooden floor, your grunts loud and strained. Why does he have to be so heavy?
You immediately let go of Kaiser once he was in his room, collapsing the supposedly sleeping body on the mattress.
Then this jerk starts laughing. Boisterously. Disturbingly. Honestly, you feel so shocked that you could only blink slowly and process everything that's happening, the man you thought was sleeping was laughing so hard it pisses you off.
"Jerk!" You exclaim. "Oh, you're such a comedian! You really do love me!" He says, sitting up to see that reaction he found so cute. "I was helping you, fucking bastard,"
"That's me," He says confidently, flexing his bicep. And it annoys you.
"Now, if you excuse me, I got to practice," He stands up, getting dizzy at the sudden adjustment. But before he even leaves, he wobbles to the drawer unexpectedly, pulling out a face towel with cute rubber ducks on it. "Here, saviour. For your sweat."
"I really can't tell if you're trying to be nice or pissing me off," You groan, wiping your forehead and your sweaty neck.
He looks at you with some sort of... admiration, in his eyes. And he laughs again, softer and more genuine this time. "I think you should come watch me practice." You roll your eyes. "After I tore all my muscles carrying you? You wish, asshole,"
Kaiser's never felt this way. Why was he finding your anger so cute? He puts on his jersey for practice, his long hair getting snugly stuck underneath the neckline. So you go and untuck it, getting dangerously close to this man.
Yeah. He thinks he's in love.
"You're so damn small, it must have been a miracle when you carried me here," He whispers. Kaiser doesn't whisper. He yells. A lot.
"Miracle, me?"
"... Yeah, you."
Rin Itoshi's
One turn of a head, and he's fast asleep? That was so unlikely of him, you think. Because, you're talking about Rin Itoshi here, asleep, beside you, so close you could feel the faint pitter patter of his heart and the even fainter breath. So deep into that slumber you felt bad even thinking of waking the striker up.And he doesn't usually mess with people.
But he wants to see that reaction that he finds ever-so-slightly, cute. When you scrunch up your nose in frustion, your eyebrows furrowed and your eyelids low. He loves it. It's one of the only things he finds himself looking for in every living moment he spends. But he doesn't quite know why, why he adores your long hair and every curve of your body he longs to touch.
He's cute, too. But Rin doesn't know that. Only you do. Or, at least, you're convinced you're his biggest fan, his best-est friend, or even something along the lines of.
That's why— he's currently trying to peek at you, while also trying to keep pretending he's asleep. Oh! He shuts his eyes tightly, once you turn to look at him. No, no, if he gets caught without saying it himself, it'll be embarrassing. So maybe... maybe he should just come clean already, and—
Panic, panic, panic.
You can hear his breath hitch softly and his eyelashes flutter faintly. Maybe he just does that. You take him by the arm, throwing it around your neck and over your shoulder to take him to his room, to let the pretty boy fall asleep. And oh, how you struggled.
But Rin thinks he's struggling more, trying desperately to stop himself from getting too flustered at the proximity he didn't expect. He makes himself lighter so you didn't have a harder time. He'd usually weigh himself down purposefully, or not fake sleep at all, but he found himself acting different around you.
Not too different. Only... less indifferent. You were more tolerable than the rest.
So once he plops down onto the bed, free from your helping grip, he feels this longing. This yearning. Your touch was too much for him, and now he wants more and more and more. You begin walking away, deciding to let him sleep, but—
"Sorry." Your head snaps in his direction. You'd almost gotten whiplash.
"Huh?! What happened to your sleeping ass?" Still half-lidded, Rin fiddles with the hem of his sweater, avoiding all form of eye contact with you. He just tricked you. And he was guilty. So unlike him. "I wasn't asleep."
You cross your arms with a smirk on your face, oh you knew well. That look on his cute face says it all, that he enjoyed how you were nice enough to accompany his heavy weight up the stairs and into his bedroom.
"You act better than I thought," You tell him. He just hums in agreement, coming back to his original attitude.
"Little trickster."
And when he looks up at you— oh, you think you're about to fold.
"I know."
Ryusei Shidou's
He's snoring loudly, smiliarly to an old man. Damn this boy. Was he serious or was he serious? You think it's very Ryusei Shidou of Ryusei to fall asleep in the middle of a conversation, because not even ten minutes into the topic of leopards, he's passed out, his head facing the side. No wonder the idiot's snoring.
But it's all an act.
Ryusei is wide awake. He may have underestimated how hard closing his eyes for more than a milisecond was, but he is more than determined to see if you'd kiss him with a true love's kiss. Like a fucking Disney princess.
You groaned, standing up with your hands on your hips. You theorize that he's fake sleeping, since there's a goddamned smirk on his face, but you believe it anyway. "Holy shit, you fell asleep, you asshole." With a sigh, you decide to snap a photo of him before deciding to be a nicer bitch for once.
He accidentally opens his eyes and groans when you start lifting him up, but closes them tightly as to keep the act up. Where were you taking him? Upstairs? Ryusei hears your grunts as you desperately try to grab him. He falls back on you anyway, his back pressing against your chest and tensing up. Not like you felt it.
"Alrighty, here we go," This man is eighty percent muscle mass, and you were attempting to carry him?
Get this, he was so comfortable despite your struggle, that he actually falls asleep. For what seems like a mere split second, his breath shallows and his snores get quieter, and his muscles relax on you. You're confused.
The floorboards creak with every step you took, dragging the blonde by his waist weakly. Maybe if he didn't go to the gym so much. With a grunt, you throw him on the bed feeling strained as hell. "Fuck you, honestly."
Walking to the edge of the bed, you pull out your phone to see the picture, and there's this laughter. His laughter. You sigh as you shake your head, knowing your first thought was right after all. He wasn't really sleeping.
"What? Had a hard time?" Ryusei teases, the volume of his laughter baffling you. "Shut up."
"No, no, I'll sleep, I'll sleep," He makes a snoring sound again, but not before laughing his ass off. You're extremely annoyed. You regret being nice. But, you have to admit it, his laugh did bring a smile to your face, in some weird way.
He sits up to peek at your phone not-so-sneakily, chorting. "Ya even took my pic!"
You squeak, and find Ryusei immediately at your side, looking at his fakely asleep self on your phone. His hand is on your waist instinctively, as he stares with that smile, that grin you used to hate. But you love it now.
"You're so obsessed with me," He says. "You gonna make it a wallpaper like a lovesick simp?"
Turning your head and smirking, he blushes. Yeah, he might just be into every other girl, but you're the only one who made him blush that much.
"Maybe so,"
"... Fuck you."
ⒺⓃⓂⒾⒺᛌⓈ bllk fanfic
#blue lock#bllk#blue lock fic#blue lock fanfiction#blue lock x reader#bllk fic#bllk x reader#bllk x you#sae itoshi#itoshi sae#sae x reader#sae x you#sae itoshi x reader#bllk sae#blue lock sae#michael kaiser#kaiser michael#kaiser x reader#kaiser x you#michael kaiser x reader#blue lock kaiser#bllk kaiser#rin itoshi#itoshi rin#rin x reader#rin x you#rin itoshi x reader#blue lock rin#bllk rin#ryusei shidou
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wherever you are, wherever you may be — i. rin
soulmates (name au) + "i'm done waiting."
synopsis. itoshi rin meets you under a sky full of fireworks. he spends the next 6 years of his life trying to convince himself that he doesn't love you. you spend the next 6 years giving him every reason why he should.
wc. 12.4k (i need to close my eyes and sleep for a while)
notes. huge thank you to ellie (@hyomagiri) and mari (@saetoshi) for helping me with this 🥹 this fic actually put me through it and i'm so grateful to both of them for their support 💗
— for my beloved @ode2rin 💐 | event masterlist ✉️
─── ・ 。゚☆: *.☽ .* :☆゚. ───
2024
Every year on the seventh day of the seventh month, Itoshi Rin finds himself standing at the daunting entrance to his local shrine.
The tradition is completely beneath him—something childish that he grumbles about under his breath despite letting you drag him all the way out here with soft eyes watching your smile.
Tanabata is the festival of stars. Of love.
It is a story his mother used to whisper to him as they watched the night sky in awe, pretending that the galaxy was collapsing in on itself to allow for a romantic midnight rendezvous between two lovers.
It’s something far too sappy for his liking.
But the food is okay, he supposes, and it’s a good opportunity to get out of the house and spend time with you which he seldom has time to do now that he’s back in his training season.
There were too many things about it that he loathed: the screaming children that would bump into his legs; the way his ears would stay ringing for days after the festival ended; how you could always convince him to come as if you were some sort of hypnotic devil in disguise, and how thoroughly wounded his pride would be at that fact.
However, his least favourite part of the festival by far is writing down his wish for the year on a scrap piece of paper and hanging it around a bamboo tree. One, because he can never for the life of him think of anything meaningful to wish for. And two, because he isn’t sure he even believes in that sort of thing.
Rin is struggling again this year, pencil lightly scratching his temple as he thinks.
He’s painfully aware that he’s never put so much thought into this before, but you seemed so excited to come all the way here before heading to the festivities that he couldn’t possibly let you down.
His wish dawns on him then, something he wants to do before the next time he makes the climb all the way back up here 365 days from now.
“Hey,” your voice calls out quietly. “What did you wish for?”
“What did you wish for?” Rin quickly refutes.
You cast your narrowed eyes from the side, tilting your little slip of yellow paper away from him.
“Only if I get to see yours first.”
Normally, he would give in to you right away. His resolve when it comes to you is embarrassingly weak. But there’s no way for him to explain himself. No way he could show you the words he’s written lest he hurt his ego.
He stubbornly folds up the piece of paper and shoves your face away. All you do is laugh and he feels terribly warm.
“No peeking,” he tells you when you kiss across his fingertips.
─── ・ 。゚☆: *.☽ .* :☆゚. ───
2018
A name appeared for Itoshi Rin when he turned thirteen years old.
He remembers the day well—it was hard to forget, anyway. As much as he wanted to focus on the burning of the name etching its way down his skin, he couldn’t. Not when he was blinking snow out of his lashes and watching his brother’s retreating back.
Rin likes to think that the universe fucks with him in any way that it can.
Maybe he had done something terrible in his past life and this was its karmic retribution, or maybe he was just unlucky.
What he does know is this: the name on his pinky only reminds him of all the things he ever lost.
Every syllable struck needles into his heart—a painful memory of crawling after the tracks of the wheels Sae left behind with his luggage until gravel and ice were stuck under his nails. Or worse, the clawing of his throat as they sat across from each other at dinner—the way he didn't even smile when Rin announced to his parents that his soulmate mark had appeared while his mother cried out in joy.
In fact, Sae didn’t talk to him for the rest of his visit. He remembers that hurt the most.
The name had haunted him for all the remaining years of his life—a forced memory that he wished he could forget. There came with it a feeling of loneliness that crushed him despite the proof on his pinky that there was another soul wandering the earth that would fix him.
He refused to believe it.
Only revenge would fix him. Only proving himself better would heal the cracks in his heart. Only beating Sae. Sae, Sae, Sae. His brother’s name had been repeated so many times that it was easy to ignore the other burning his skin.
In all those years he found it easy to cast aside his soulmate. To ignore it even if it hurt.
So he wonders why it’s so bad tonight.
He’s done everything he could think of: slathering cooling ointment down his finger to stop the searing, wrapping it in a cast to prevent himself from admiring it for too long, even tying a wish to a piece of bamboo hoping it would disappear.
A finger snaps in front of his face, drawing his attention to his teammates in front of him. Both look equally amused.
“You’re dreaming,” Isagi muses. “You’ve been spacing out all night. Is everything okay?”
“I’m fine,” Rin mutters, swatting his teammate’s hand away from him. He had been staring again, longingly eyeing the way the letters danced down his skin. “Just thinking.”
“About?”
“None of your business.”
“Yeesh, it’s not good to keep things bottled up, you know?”
“You’re annoying,” Rin glowers before it melts back into indifference. “I’m fine,” he reiterates.
Isagi seems unconvinced, as he usually is when Rin is being mysteriously vague about what’s on his mind. He and Bachira share a tentative glance before sighing and shaking their heads.
“Well… okay,” he finally yields. “We’re going to get some snacks before the fireworks start. If you’re going to sulk then at least stay put and do it here so we can find you again.”
“Yeah,” Rin grumbles, already making an escape plan. “Whatever. Will do.”
As soon as the boys are out of sight, he turns heel and hurries away. The crowd is driving him crazy and he needs somewhere quiet so he can stare at his hands until his eyes are dry.
He comes to a pond situated just outside of the festival grounds, deep water glimmering under the moon and the passing lanterns.
Plopping down on the bench, he hunches over onto his knees with his elbows and takes a deep breath. It instead comes shallow, as if someone has just punched him in the gut.
It’s then that he realizes he’s not alone.
Your yukata is muddy, fabric soaked and dripping at the sleeves though you don’t seem to care or even notice. You look frustrated for some reason, lip curled into a concentrated frown while you plunge your hands into the mud around the edge of the water.
Away from the crowds of people, he can hear the summer song of cicadas chirping all around. Your hands dip in and out of the water, quiet splashes filling the rest of the silence on top of the distant buzz of children laughing.
It’s just you and him. Something primal inside of him rages, pounding against his chest until it feels like he’s suffocating.
Run. Run. Run.
His legs jerk, urging him to stand up and leave, but he feels glued down to the bench—tethered where he sits and forced to watch you repeatedly sink your hands into the muddy waters.
No more than five minutes must pass as you both ignore each other, yet it feels like an eternity stretches by.
Finally, you pipe up.
“You’re scaring them,” you tell him plainly.
His head whips in your direction at your voice, soft and careful. His teal eyes narrow at you. “Huh?”
Your frown deepens, turning to look at him with your hands still submerged. “The frogs.”
“Come again?”
“Your vibes. It’s scaring the frogs away.”
His eye twitches.
“Ever consider that you’re just dogshit at catching them?”
“Excuse me?”
“And look at you, making a total mess of yourself. Don’t you care that you have to go home looking like that?” He presses, leering at you like an insect he’s about to crush under his heel. You simply stare at him, expression blank.
Huffing, you tear away from him and sink your hands beneath the mud. “No. I don’t.”
He watches in silence as you sift around for a moment before pulling your hands up, a smile slowly morphing into your face.
“I got one…” You breathe, looking more elated than he thinks you should. “I really caught one.”
“First time?” He quips sarcastically. A part of him wonders why he hasn’t gotten up and left you altogether yet.
“Cut me some slack,” you complain, eyeing him from the side again. You gently run a finger along the back of the frog, trying not to scare it away. “I haven’t done this in forever.”
“Clearly.”
You snort. “Yeah. Clearly.”
Rin looks at you quizzically, puzzled at your sudden change in demeanor. You seem… softer. Less agitated, at the very least. You’re gazing at the frog adoringly, as if it had somehow solved all of your problems and was dragging you into another world.
Any retort he had ready to shoot at you dies in his mouth. The anger rising in his chest extinguishes in the blink of an eye, and a deep hush settles over you as he watches in curiosity.
For a moment, the universe goes quiet. He’s gotten so used to having everything on his mind all at once that the silence is almost unnerving.
He once believed that his world would end with an injury that never healed quite right, or when he was too old for any team to want him.
He once believed that his world would end when he could no longer imagine the feel of a ball between his palms.
He once believed that his world would end the day he couldn’t play football anymore—that the only thing that would ever kill him was if the chance of standing alongside his brother died with him.
But he was wrong.
Itoshi Rin’s world ends with the bellow of a firework.
In a few years, he would think of this stretch of a few seconds fondly. He would squeeze you a little tighter with his chin resting on your shoulder, staring up at a colourful sky. He would think it was poetic, in a way, that you were the one who painted his world in the same hues of shimmering gold.
Rin remembers, though, that only one thought had crossed his mind.
I’m so screwed.
He can see every fine detail of your face, illuminated in all the colours of the rainbow. And he can’t help but think you are the most beautiful person he’s ever seen. He can trace each intricate curve of your nose to your chin to the surprised parting of your lips; the way your lashes flutter as you blink rapidly, tensed from the sudden explosion.
The light fades faster than it appeared, yet it feels like a millennium has passed. The reverbing echo of the firework crackles across the sky, thundering in his ears so loud that he can feel it pounding in his chest.
(Or is that his heart? He can’t tell. He feels dizzy.)
Darkness envelops your bodies again, save for the dim glow of distant lanterns. Every part of you is seared into his memory, a floating image when he blinks.
The frog leaps from your hands back into the water, leaving nothing but ripples behind.
You stay there with your hands outstretched, looking lonely under the dark sky. Another one goes off above your heads, signalling the start of the display.
“There you are, Rin!” Bachira and Isagi come rushing over from the path, excited smiles and mirth bubbling in their laughs as they approach. “We thought you went home without us already!”
Rin slowly blinks out of his reverie. For a second, he glances in your direction again just to catch your eyes.
“I almost did,” he grumbles, forcing himself not to stare.
“Fireworks are starting!” Isagi yanks Rin to his feet and begins dragging him away before he can even protest.
Without turning around, he can feel the weight of your eyes in the back of his head. There’s an unfamiliar ache in his chest, and the name etched down his pinky burns infinitely hot.
Later at home, he stares at the spot where Sae used to sit back when he still came to Japan for anything other than to take a new passport photo.
“My soulmate’s name showed up,” he had mumbled that night to break the tense silence. It was strange that he still felt like he owed his brother that much—to make his visit as normal as possible despite having his heart carved open.
Sae only looked at him blankly, spoon halting just above his bowl. He was eerily still, quietly deciding how to react. Then,
“Good for you,” he said. And nothing more.
Rin squeezes his eyes shut and he feels warmth rolling down his cheeks. He quickly wipes the tears away, pretending as if they never existed.
He spends the rest of the night trying to forget your face.
(And the next year trying to recreate it in his dreams.)
─── ・ 。゚☆: *.☽ .* :☆゚. ───
2019
Rin makes it another 275 days before he finally remembers every piece of the puzzle that is your existence.
He saw you in his sleep. The back of your head, anyway.
You were sitting in his favourite café, at the table he claimed for himself right by the window. You ordered a coffee but let it sit for so long that the ice melted. Then, you wiped up the condensation rolling down the frosty glass with your finger.
Rin watched you from afar, observing you the way he wished he did last summer.
Maybe then he could have dived deep into the recesses of his brain to remember why exactly you struck him so. But there he was, stuck watching the back of your head as you gazed out the window.
Tap. Tap. Tap.
Your fingers drummed mindlessly against the wooden table, reciting a rhythm just slightly louder than the pounding of his own heart.
“Can you leave me alone?” He finally called out, hoping it would stop your incessant beating.
Tap. Tap. Tap.
“You’re annoying me,” he hissed. Annoying for disturbing his peace and quiet. Annoying for plaguing his dreams even after all these days.
Tap. Tap. Tap.
“Seriously,” he grunted, standing up from his seat so fast that the chair scraped horribly against the wooden floor. Still, you didn’t pay him any mind, instead more interested in the faceless people walking by. “Knock it off!”
Tap.
Tap.
Tap.
He bit the inside of his cheek in hesitation, the itch in the back of his mind ever present. “What’s your name?”
Silence.
You finally turned his way. Slowly. Agonizingly slow. And Rin was right—you were still so beautiful, 275 days later.
Grinning at him big and bright, you almost seemed to collapse in on yourself with joy. Like a star about to implode, or maybe more akin to a firework.
Either way, his breath was stolen from him.
You silently mouthed your name, making sure he saw every vowel and accentuated syllable. Warmth flooded him in every way—probably brought on by the racing of his heart.
It was impossible that his soulmate was someone like this. Someone whose smile looked like it could heal even the deepest wounds.
You grabbed his attention again with a big wave of the arms, and he watched in anticipation.
“You’re—”
Rin followed your mouth as you sounded out the words without a voice.
“—smiling!”
He reached up to run his fingers along his bottom lip. And you were right, he realized, as he traced it midway up his cheek.
(When did he start smiling?)
(Why?)
─── ・ 。゚☆: *.☽ .* :☆゚. ───
Rin thinks about you just as much in the waking world as he does in his dreams.
It’s spring, though snow is still settled over the eaves of homes that he passes on the way to the grocery store. Apparently the winter cold is supposed to be especially long and bitter this year, permeating until mid-May.
He stares at his feet as they mark the virgin snow, decorating his sneakers white and making his feet cold.
Did you walk through the same snow this morning?
Then, when he’s going through the motion of smelling the bottom of pineapples at the store:
Do you like pineapple? What if you’re allergic?
(He shakes his head and puts them away. He suddenly isn’t craving it.)
His obsession with you has only intensified as the year has gone on. If you ever peered into his mind, he would receive a well-deserved slap across the face.
The soulmate mark engraved down his pinky has never bothered him so badly.
It’s like you’re constantly with him—a ghost haunting him, or perhaps more like a curse. Thinking about you takes up unnecessary space in his head. Space that should be dedicated to football, and football only.
He's about to go home so he can make a list outlining the ways he can forget about you.
(Ironic, he knows, but in all honesty he already exhausted all of his options from his first list.)
But then he comes to a stop outside of his favourite café. It looks the same, even has the same advertisements plastered in the window as the last time he was here.
He hesitates at the door, but when he walks in it smells the same. It's decorated the same. Not a single table is out of place.
He walks up to his regular spot, runs his fingers along the wood where he remembers you tapping in his dream.
There's no sign of your existence here.
Rin shakes his head in annoyance, cursing himself out in his head because he was stupid enough to think he would run into you here.
Then disappointment floods his body, like a dam had been released in his chest and it's flowing unstoppably to every piece of him.
(Wait, why is he disappointed? He really needs to take a nap.)
He runs his hand through his hair as a nervous reflex, simultaneously relieved and irritated that you're nowhere to be seen.
It takes him a minute to recollect himself, to realize that he probably looks like a crazy person just standing beside an empty table like a lost child who doesn't know where to go, and decides to just go home.
He pulls into the line to get a drink for his walk home when—
"Thanks!"
His heart drops.
You waltz out of the back, tying your apron around your waist as you exchange spots in the break room with one of your coworkers.
Rin is about to die, seriously. You must be new here, since he's been to this café more times than he can count and he's never seen you before. Or was it that he was specifically looking out for you this time?
Whatever the reason, he's dumbfounded.
“Hey,” your acknowledgment makes him freeze in his spot. “Frog guy?”
He looks at you stupidly, rubbing his eyes like a cartoon character as if he’s imagining you standing right in front of him.
His gaze drifts down to your name tag, fresh and newly printed with white marker. Signed at the end is a little flower, petals swirled into tiny hearts.
Your existence before him is undeniable.
"Um. Yeah," he sputters in disbelief.
"I..." You clear your throat, looking as bewildered as he feels. "I didn't think I'd see you again."
'You're my soulmate. Of course we'd run into each other,' he thinks to himself. Out loud, though:
"Yeah. Me neither."
The person behind him in line coughs quietly, impatiently tapping their foot. Rin takes the hint and quietly tells you what he wants. You lean in across the counter to hear him better, and his face grows warm.
Once you fill in the boxes on the cup, you place it down and move it to the side for someone to fill. It catches his eye immediately.
Itoshi Rin is scribbled neatly down the side of his cup.
“How did you...?”
You awkwardly shift in your spot, evidently embarrassed as you fiddle with the strings of your apron. Then, with your own hands.
“W-Well…”
His eyes dare to drop down to where your thumb is nervously slathering up and down the name on your pinky.
“Oh.”
"Sorry, I just figured—"
"It's fine," he interrupts. Your mouth snaps shut.
Tense silence stretches thin in the air, ready to shatter at any moment. But for some reason, he feels as though he's choking on nothing.
You fumble over the emptiness, quickly snatching up the cup to make his drink yourself after deciding it's too awkward to just stand there.
He watches you in a daze, half shaken and half in awe. Never in a million years would he have thought a dream would lead him back to you.
When you turn back around with a full cup, you look equally stunned.
“Itoshi—”
“Rin. It’s just Rin.”
You look at him in surprise, lashes fluttering rapidly as you let it sink in.
It's not your fault. You don't know that it's a sore spot that he just so happens to share the same last name with the person he despises most in the world.
It's not your fault that he has a quick temper and his voice raises slightly, enough to make you flinch back just a tiny bit.
And it's definitely not your fault that it stings so much—that he had expected you to speak to him as if you'd already known him for a lifetime and not as if you were just two strangers looking at each other from across a bar counter.
“O-Okay," you take a deep breath, cheeks puffed out and expression unreadable.
You slide the cup across the counter and he catches it in his hand.
He debates whether or not he should say more, like apologize for snapping at you. But then someone calls you by your name, and the way it rolls so beautifully off their tongue catches him off guard.
"Sorry. See you, Rin," you smile sweetly. Maybe a little awkwardly, a small step toward the one he dreamed about. And his heart is set in motion.
Rin decides that today won't be the day.
Another day, he'll be brave enough to crack a joke so dry that you try and scrub his name off your skin. And another day, he will ask for your number because, yeah, you might be the most alluring person he's ever met.
As he turns to take his leave after just staring at the spot you were standing in for a solid few seconds, he can hear some of the other baristas clamouring for you.
He doesn't want to look. Really, honestly, he doesn't.
But he does anyway.
It's just a quick glance over his shoulder—nothing more than a fleeting moment as he takes the chance to look at you one more time.
Those two seconds is all it takes for him to realize just how much trouble he's in.
You're laughing big and toothy, waving your hand in front of your face dismissively as your coworkers poke fun at how flustered you are. Then your hands are clasped over your stomach and you've doubled down a little in your awkward fit.
His heart has never beat so loud in his own ears.
─── ・ 。゚☆: *.☽ .* :☆゚. ───
Itoshi Rin used to smile just for the sake of smiling, once upon a time.
He had aunties who would pinch him by the cheek and fawn over him, cooing about how he looked just like his mother. How his face would cherub and the apples of his cheeks were bright red. Even when he grew out of his baby face, people would tell him how wonderful his smile was.
Sae rarely ever smiled, so it was something exclusive. He never felt like he was standing in his shadow. It was special—the kind of praise only one Itoshi would know.
Rin has forgotten how to smile like that.
He smiles to be polite to his family, if ever. Even then, it's not like he owes them that much. At some point, it became too much effort. And he had no reason to do it.
It was always a tiny thought bothering him in the back of his mind:
I'll never meet my soulmate if I'm always scowling like this.
He thought that was what he wanted, anyway. He wouldn't need to worry about running into his soulmate if no one ever looked his way. If everyone feared him enough not to spare him a second glance.
He doubts everything he ever thought as he sits on the edge of his bed staring at his desk.
It's lit up by a single lamp, shining down on his empty coffee cup like a spotlight opened up by the heavens themselves.
Your phone number is written just below his name.
Rin had almost tossed it into the trash without a second thought earlier in the day. He would have, if it weren't for the loose dog that blitzed by him and made him drop it.
Fate just loves to mess with him.
He picked it up and his thumb had stopped over the number. It was written so small, as if you had wanted him to miss it. Or perhaps you wanted to test destiny yourself—to see if the planets would align and he would discover your seven digits there for him to find.
And now he's home. He's been home, just looking. Contemplating. Stressing.
He migrates from the edge of the bed and settles into his desk chair. Then he gets up, moves back to the bed, and flops down. An endless cycle, back and forth, pushing and pulling.
Rin plops down onto his desk seat and sighs in frustration, ruffling his hair around before his forehead slams into the table.
Every part of his mind screams at him to stop. To toss the cup away and forget today ever happened. His head raises from his arms and he stares at the set of numbers illuminated on the paper, taunting him.
Finally, he exhales through his nose, sitting up straight and reaching for the cup to toss. His fingers delicately brush along your phone number.
“So dumb…” He huffs, eventually finding his phone instead and opening his contacts.
It’s nearly midnight. He tries to imagine your face as you wait by your phone for a message from him, that stupidly hopeful glimmer in your eyes, and he feels sick to his stomach as he sends it.
Rin: hey. it’s rin.
He throws his phone down on the desk again, screen down so he can’t cringe at himself. A few minutes pass in complete silence as he sulks.
He considers that you may have gone to bed already, or you were offended by the fact that he ignored your offer to connect all day and instantly blocked him. Maybe you thought he never saw your number at all.
Then his phone buzzes. His body moves on autopilot, snatching it up faster than he can realize what he’s doing. He’s halfway through the embarrassing thought that he just immediately read your message after you sent it as your text sinks in.
Unknown: hi! it’s great to hear from you ヾ(〃^∇^)ノ
Unknown: i was starting to think you were never gonna text lol
Rin: i wasn’t
He chews his lip for a moment before quickly following up:
Rin: but i changed my mind. just cause.
Unknown: hahaha got it got it. ‘just cause’ (˘◡˘)
Unknown: rin
Unknown: wait nvm
Unknown: whatever
Unknown: rin
Rin: what
Unknown: let’s get coffee ^ ^
He stares at the screen in disbelief, watching the typing bubble pop up and disappear again and again. He can imagine again what kind of smile you must have on your face right now, or maybe you look flustered, or maybe this all means nothing to you at all and this is your way of being polite.
Regardless of the reason, he eventually types out his response.
Rin: ok
Christ, he’s so tepid.
─── ・ 。゚☆: *.☽ .* :☆゚. ───
2020
He comes to memorize every part of you, like how the sun kisses the horizon and the moon knows the tides.
Intimately, almost—if he didn’t overthink the way your touch lingered on him he could easily ignore the way it made his heart pound in his ears.
Rin learns the feeling of your fingers against his skin as you compress an ice pack to his knee. He knows your laugh—can pick apart sarcasm from genuine cheer unlike most other people he encounters. He’s never been good at reading people yet for some reason you’ve become an open book for him.
It’s not fair that you’ve ensnared him this way, that he can’t seem to run from you (because his favourite coffee is from your café and he can’t be bothered to find a new place). That he finds himself instinctively reaching over to his phone when he can’t sleep (he has to make sure his alarms are on, might as well text you goodnight while he’s at it). And you’ve become annoyingly comfortable (he doesn’t have an excuse for this one—your lap is just conveniently a very nice place to rest his head).
He must be an open book, too.
At some point he probably stopped trying to hide his growing feelings for you, though you either didn’t notice his sudden shift or you didn’t care.
Vulnerability has never been a part of Rin, even before Itoshi Sae ruined his life.
He despises how you so easily pry him apart, skinning him alive with your hand lathering down his chest as you laugh.
Still, he’s grown accustomed to your fingers stringing through his hair, to the way your head tilts when he explains football plays to you, to the obvious way you fluster when he attempts (poorly) at flirting with you.
He’s gotten especially fond of the way you meet him at the end of his practices with such sweet, wandering hands—pushing the hair stuck to his forehead from sweat away from his eyes; using a towel to wipe up his neck; the squeeze you give his palms as you examine them to see if there are any new cuts and bruises.
Usually, he’s the epitome of confidence in his plays. Today, however, his cheeks burn as you approach him with the same honeyed smile.
“My shots were shoddy,” he admits before you can even get a word out. You only raise a brow, hands faltering in front of you. “That was lame.”
“I think you’re good.”
“Good,” he frowns. “But not great?”
“The greatest,” you quickly correct yourself, smiling at his cravings for praise. You’re armed with a fresh towel like you always are, reaching up to clean his face as if it’s the only thing you were born to do.
He relishes in your gentle touch, peering at you through his lashes while you prattle on about how amazing he was even though he missed half of his shots.
You were so blindly supportive, it sickens him.
Not because he felt you were being disingenuous, but because he’s not deserving of your praise.
For the first time in a long time, it feels as though his soul is disconnected from his body. He used to walk the earth this way—uninterested in his surroundings and obsessed with only one thing.
Itoshi Sae. Itoshi Sae. Itoshi Sae.
Suddenly, he’s thirteen again and gasping for air; screaming into his pillow and trashing their shared awards until his mother comes rushing in to stop him. He’s alone in a field, abandoned and crushed.
It’s not like he’d never lost before, even in front of you. Loss was just a part of football as much as he hated it.
But your praise only makes his stomach turn, because he knows you mean it.
You truly do believe he’s the best, when really he’s been futile in his attempts to catch up with the big brother he admired so much as a kid.
“Stop,” he gently interrupts.
Rin tries to use his hair to hide the wetness of his eyes, with little success. You can see right through him, unfortunately. It’s a talent he wishes you didn’t have.
“Rin?” You say softly, reaching up to brush the hair out of the way. He doesn’t try and back up or swat your hand away, instead letting you see his miserable expression. You sigh quietly, looking more exasperated than surprised.
“Sorry,” he mutters halfheartedly.
You shake your head. “You have nothing to apologize for.”
Shame boils in his stomach at your reassurance. There is something to apologize for. Here you are, supporting him with all your heart, and all he can think about is his stupid brother. How he’ll never catch up. How he’ll never be good enough.
Doesn’t your kindness warrant his attention at the very least?
“Come on,” you tug at his hand. “Let’s get you a pick-me-up.”
Rin abides silently, body following yours off the field and onto the streets though his mind has floated off elsewhere.
He tries to count how many steps you take in between the field and the destination, but loses count somewhere around three hundred. Then he moves on to counting the hairs on the back of your head. He loses count at one hundred. Eventually, he gives up and opts for staring at your conjoined hands while he lags behind.
When you come to a halt, he nearly bumps into your back.
The ringing in his ears stops as he blinks at his surroundings. Waves crash against the shore of the sandbank, singing the song of the ocean. It had been so long since Rin walked down this stretch of the shore, he almost forgot what the sea looked like.
“Wait here,” you urge as you hold him by the shoulders then disappear around the corner.
He collapses at the wall separating land from sea, swinging his legs under the railings to sit comfortably as he remembers doing when he was a kid. His gym bag is abandoned behind him, cleats and all.
When you return, you shove a popsicle into his hand.
He’s confused at first, just looking absently at the packaging. It must be for a concerning amount of time, because you eventually pipe up.
“Do you need me to open it for you?”
Rin glares at you and your teasing smile. Carefully, he unpackages the treat and pops it in his mouth.
Sweetness melts over his tongue and he exhales sharply through his nose. You watch him in amusement with your own treat stuck in your mouth.
Silence engulfs you, eating Rin from the inside out until he feels ill. He holds his half-eaten popsicle in front of him, watching it melt down his hand.
You stare at him for a second before nudging him lightly with your elbow.
“I was being serious. You were really good. I can’t even imagine playing like you do.”
Rin’s stomach turns. The last thing he wants is your pity.
“You don’t have to be so nice,” he mumbles, resting his chin on the railing. “42 percent.”
“42 percent?” You echo, peering over the railing to get a better look at his face.
“The percent of shots I made today.”
“Come on,” you urge gently. “Aren’t you being too hard on yourself?”
“If I’m not hard on myself, I’ll never—” he stops, choking lightly on his spit. When you don’t interrupt, he shoves the popsicle back in his mouth. “Whatever. You wouldn't get it.”
It’s quiet again, save for the crashing of waves upon rock. Rin thinks for a moment that maybe he had gone too far, or that his little meltdown had freaked you out.
But when he finally dares to look at you again, you’re smiling.
“Maybe not,” you admit with a whisper. “But I do know this…” You reach over and cup his cheek with your free hand, thumb sweeping the expanse of his cheek soothingly. “There is no one—and I mean no one—who works harder than you do.”
He swallows thickly, subconsciously nudging his face a little further into your palm.
“You deserve to be a little kinder to yourself.”
The way his heart catches in his throat is strange. He can’t describe it. The warmth in his belly is foreign, but it’s pleasant.
For the first time in the year he’s gotten to know you, the thought crosses his mind:
I think I’m in love with you.
Rin’s mouth opens with the idea, but he forces it shut just as fast.
Fear grips his lungs and squeezes, stealing his air and forcing him to pull away from your touch.
“Okay,” he breathes in resignation.
You seem stunned by his sudden retreat, smile faltering ever so slightly. But you recover quickly, hugging yourself as you slouch over the railing.
Conversation moves on just like that. He appreciated that about you, too. He never had to dwell.
It feels nice, everything about this; to have his legs dangling over the edge of the cement, feet barely ghosting over the surface of the water; to have a popsicle melting between his teeth while he listens to you talk.
For some reason, it feels as though he’s reclaiming lost time, reliving a moment he thought he would never have again.
When he checks his popsicle stick, it tells him he’s a winner for the first time since he was thirteen.
(He finally allows himself to believe it when your knee gently knocks into his.)
─── ・ 。゚☆: *.☽ .* :☆゚. ───
2021
“Frog cotton candy?”
“Frog shaped cotton candy,” Rin corrects, peering around the giant fluff of candy to look at you quizzically.
“Yeah,” you giggle. “But why?”
He grumbles quietly, cheeks a soft shade of pink as he shoves the treat into your hands.
“I thought you’d like it. Nevermind,” he deadpans, turning around to toss it into the garbage.
Your laugh crescendos and he feels his heart squeeze with affection. When your hand stops him by the forearm, he thinks he might explode.
“It’s cute.”
You pick apart the floss ruthlessly with your fingers, and he watches almost in a trance—hypnotized by just your existence.
(When you finally pop the sugar into your mouth, he imagines it melting on his own tongue. The thought makes him unbearably warm and he forces it away.)
His fascination with you doesn't end there.
There's a certain charm to you that he can't understand—something that draws him in, tantalizing but terrifying at the same time.
He can't help the way he watches in a daze, the way you've ensnared all his attention and taken up the space in his mind.
Rin has never been good at being kind, but here he is.
Here he is, bringing you cotton candy because he thought it was stupid but cute.
Here he is, rolling up the sleeves of your yukata with a gentle scolding when you rush over to catch goldfish.
And here he is, letting you cling to his arm as if he's the only thing keeping you tethered to the earth.
He really, really hates it—how mushy you make his brain feel.
He's halfway through re-rolling your sleeves with a half-hearted scowl on his face when you stop him, hand pressed to his forearm.
“Listen, Rin.”
“Hm?” He leans down so that he can peer at your face hidden behind your almost nonexistent candy floss.
“I have to show you something.”
Rin stops dead in his tracks, raising a brow as he fully turns toward you. “What is it?”
“Can you close your eyes for me?”
His heart does a somersault in his chest. “You’re not doing anything weird, are you?”
“Who do you think I am?” You sputter.
He lets out a long sigh before complying, squeezing his eyes shut. After a long silence, he considers peeking a little bit.
That is, until he feels your breath gently fanning over his parted lips.
Nearly leaping back, he wills himself to stay grounded and slowly slides his hands up your arms until he gets to your shoulders. As he imagined, your body is impossibly close to his.
It takes every bit of concentration he has not to waver. If he really tries, he can focus on how your breath smells sweet of candy. How your hair blows softly with the summer breeze, tickling his cheeks. How you smell. How you breathe.
(Fuck. Fuck, fuck, fuck. His heart is about to beat out of his chest. Is that okay?)
You tense up in his hold and suddenly you’re retreating from him, swiftly pulling out of his arms. Just as he’s about to ask you what happened, there’s a piece of candy shoved into his mouth.
“You wanted to try it, didn’t you?” You ask rather breathlessly. He opens his eyes, looking at you curiously.
Rin has never seen this expression on you before, lips pulled tight in embarrassment and pupils blown. You look more like a wild animal caught in a cage than someone who just made a move on him.
He gingerly takes the empty paper cone from your hands and folds it up, no longer able to meet your gaze lest he explode on the spot.
“Yeah,” he says softly, shuffling over to dump it into a bin. “Thanks.”
When he turns around to look at you again, his breath gets caught in his throat.
Why are you laughing?
You giggle into your palm, hiding your gleeful smile from him as you double over slightly.
“Your face is all red!” You holler.
He grunts in embarrassment, using the back of his hand to hide his own face. “Shut the hell up,” he spits.
“It’s almost like you wanted me to kiss you!”
“Oh my god, please drop it.”
“No way! I’ve never seen you look like that before!”
(‘Speak for yourself,’ he thinks.)
“So what if I did?”
Your laughter halts as if it was swallowed into the pits of your stomach. Slowly unraveling to stand up straight, he sees another expression he’s never been able to imagine on you, but he can’t quite place it.
“Did what?” You murmur.
“Want you to kiss me.”
Your face is warm under the glow of lanterns, eyes shimmering with the overhead lights. Rin watches your mouth open and close repeatedly as you try and formulate some sort of response.
A firework explodes atop of you, and he wonders if it just saved you.
You seem jarred for only a moment more until you jolt, grabbing him roughly by the arm and giving him a pull.
“I just remembered,” you gasp. “I actually did have something to show you!”
Rin doesn’t get a word in before you’re dragging him along by the arm. With each boom of an explosion, your footsteps pick up, building into a full blown sprint out of the festival grounds and through the thicket.
You tug him along, guiding him by the hand through the winding path of trees and logs. His stamina is better than yours but you’re pushing up the hill despite your huffing and puffing—it makes him laugh with you.
When you break free of the forest, Rin’s eyes focus on a field of plush grass and buttercups.
You let go of his hand, flinging yourself forward and spinning on your heel to exaggerate how wide the opening is with your arms.
“Isn’t it great?” You shout over the fireworks. “Away from the crowd!”
He rushes up to you so that you can stop yelling, invading your personal space until you can hear him just at his normal volume.
“It’s perfect,” he tells you earnestly.
You grin up at him widely before pulling him along to the edge of the clearing. You plop down together, eyes glued to the sky as the fireworks rage on.
Rin only lasts a few seconds before his eyes drift to the side, trying to drink in your expression. It’s become a habit of his to try and imprint your very existence into his brain.
Against his better judgment, his hand creeps toward yours until your fingers are overlapped.
Thankfully, you don’t use the opportunity to tease him about it, instead shifting a little closer until you’re practically burrowed into his side. If it were anyone else, he would have shoved them away.
(When did he stop trying to push you away?)
When your pinkies slowly close together, he feels as if he can’t breathe properly.
Mark-to-mark, it’s as though he is full of all the love he’s ever felt for you from every life—past or future. Like there’s a love that exists within him that transcends lifetimes, if it were even possible.
If he were to peer into another dimension, would you still be together like this? Would you be plucking buttercups and mindlessly twirling them between your fingers? Would he be itching to envelop you in his arms just to devour you?
His thoughts cease when you take a deep breath.
“I used to come here alone,” you admit.
“No one took you?” He asks. Your gaze is piercing the night sky, never leaving the show. He can see the bloom of colours in them.
“Not since I was little, but I always loved it here.”
The question burns hot in Rin’s mind: even if it was a little lonely sometimes?
He remembers back to the night that he first saw you, with your hands dipping into the murky waters of a frog pond and an air of desolation surrounding you. Then he remembers how he couldn’t sleep that night. Not with the image of you crouching there alone burned into his memory.
“Did you know this festival is a celebration of love?” He suddenly asks.
Oh what the fuck? Oh, god. Why did he say that?
That was so lukewarm of him. So stupid. So pointless and lame.
He just wanted something to say to you, something that would make him stop thinking about how you might have been alone for all that time before you knew him.
The silence burns between you, tense and awkward until he starts stuttering out something else to fill the void. But then you look at him, slow and intrigued and so damn amused that he can feel heat rising to the tips of his ears.
“I had no idea.”
There’s a longing in your expression that tells a different story. A twitch of your pinky against his that gives away your blatant lie.
And, damnit. Here he is again, four years later under the same stars. Under the same fireworks. Only this time, he’s able to see your face even closer as it lights up a million different colours—teal like his eyes; rose like his cheeks; golden like the heart he’s tried so hard to protect.
Four years later and he still thinks you’re the most beautiful person he’s ever seen: pinkies interlocked, sheepish smile on your face, an undeniable shake in your voice that means you have more that you’re too nervous to say.
For a moment he considers finally letting go of all the things keeping him bolted and chained where he stands, swallowing the key to the cage surrounding his fragile, thumping heart. And for that fleeting second, he feels as though he’s the bravest man alive—that nothing could stop him even if you were to turn away and snub him out with the heel of your foot.
But how could he open his mouth and tell you anything when all he feels is the sick twisting of his stomach, the daunting glare of the older brother he adored so much, and the coldness of snow soaking his clothes as he sits in a field and cries?
There’s a burning, raging fire within him. Something primal and afraid and unchanging despite how much he wants to fall into your arms the way your shared etchings say he should.
It screams at him: run away. Run. Run. Run. This will only end in hurt.
He’s too fucked up. Too messed in the head and too quick to anger because he’s actually soft at heart, easy to betray—
“Rin.”
Your hand swiftly captures his face and he’s dragged unceremoniously out of his reverie.
Of course you would be able to pick out his turmoil by expression alone. By the droop of his lips into a frown—not the annoyed one he would flash his teammates, or the grimace he would scare children away with. The kind that’s sad and slow and timid, like an animal caught in a net.
“I’m really happy that we’re friends.”
“Friends?” He breathes, half confused and half incredulous.
Deep down he knows that it’s an attempt to comfort him without being too sappy. Maybe you can sense it somewhere in your soul that he would probably break down and sob if you were to make him feel any more vulnerable than he already is with you. It’s an effort to take away whatever guilt he feels and give him a chance to relax.
However, he can see a different tale in your eyes.
Loneliness as empty as the sky on a cloudy night. A yearning for more, for someone, for him, to fill the gap. I’m tired of waiting. That’s all he can read beneath the sea of colour exploding in your irises.
It only makes him feel worse, but he allows himself to be lied to anyway if only to feel the warmth of your skin against his just a bit longer.
“Yeah.”
Your pinky twitches again. He can feel the brush of your name against his, the grate of your matching soul marks. Your eyes tear away from his and are glued to the infinite sky above once more. To the stars you know are there but are covered by smoke and fire.
Rin only stares at you. He can’t focus on the explosions of fireworks anymore, not when you’re right in front of him looking so perfect. His summer treasure.
“Yeah?”
He knows he sounds dumb, repeating everything like an oaf who can’t fathom what’s being said. You giggle and it floors him.
“Just being able to stand here with you—” you glance at him again, only for a second. He can see the exhaustion in that moment, but he’s too selfish to pry. “—I think I’m the luckiest person alive.”
“Even if…” He swallows harshly. It feels like shrapnel cutting down his throat. “Even if I can’t be more?”
“Even so.”
There’s a pause and you open your mouth to say more, maybe to give him an ultimatum or to elaborate on your feelings, but then you’re interrupted by the end of the display.
Counteless fireworks explode above you in the finale. Rin can hear the awestruck gasps of families down the hill, the distant cries of children and the faint shutter of cameras filling the air.
He realizes then: he’s been smiling. His cheeks hurt from how big it’s gotten. And you’re smiling at him, too.
(The fireworks rage on, but in the end, all he can look at is you.)
─── ・ 。゚☆: *.☽ .* :☆゚. ───
2022
Falling in love with Itoshi Rin was one of the most foolish, most wonderful things that could have happened to you.
He was an enigma in and of itself, a mystery of a soulmate who was able to love you wholeheartedly and push you away at the same time.
There were nights where you would stay up wondering why he was your soulmate when it seemed like all he wanted to be was alone. Other times, you fell asleep smiling to yourself knowing that somewhere deep down you both belonged to each other.
The universe chose you. The universe chose him. It was indisputable, yet you still had doubts.
Tonight is one of those “foolish” nights. It seems as though you have been stood up.
For three hours you’ve waited in the same spot at the gates of the festival, watching families and couples pass by but never the one person you’d wait until the end of the world for. The sun has long since gone to sleep over the horizon and the streets are fully lit up with lanterns for the festivities.
6 pm. That was the time Rin promised he would meet you. In the past, he was always late but at least had the decency to tell you beforehand that you could go ahead without him. Only when you arrived and sat down to wait for him had he finally messaged you.
Rin: gonna be late. see you at 7.
7 pm. That was the rescheduled time. It was when you expected to see him walking up to you in his yukata that you begged him to wear this year, matching adoringly with yours. And at 7 pm you would tell him. You would tell him everything.
For months prior you had practiced almost pathetically so, recited and perfected your speech while staring at your reflection in a mirror. You’d written him a letter, too.
7 pm. You were finally going to thank Rin for everything. For accompanying you to such a silly festival even though you know he loathes it. For meeting you under the stars and the moon and the fireworks time and time again. For bringing life back into a childhood memory that you had long since hated.
7 pm. You were going to tell him thank you. You were going to tell him you loved him, just as it had been written in the stars many years before you were born.
It’s 9 pm, nearing 10 and the start of the fireworks show. He missed the entire night without explanation.
At 9:58 pm, just as you’re about to give up all hope, you finally come face to face with teal eyes and a stupidly handsome face sheen with sweat. It shouldn’t hurt so much, the way he looks at you so dismissively as if he hadn’t blown you off all night.
“Sorry,” he mutters disingenuously, attempting to brush past you without a second thought. “Let’s go, I’m thirsty.”
He has his gym bag slung over his shoulder and a windbreaker over his uniform. No sign of the yukata you had picked out for him to wear.
You don’t follow him, staring at his back in disbelief. When he realizes you aren’t trailing behind, he turns on his heel and raises a brow in question. “Are you coming?”
“I was waiting for you all night,” you tell him coldly. I was waiting for you all this time and you never showed up.
He swallows thickly, suddenly overcome by guilt because of your downcast expression. “I know. I lost track of time.”
“Lost track of time?” You scoff incredulously. Your mouth opens as if you have more to say, but you’re interrupted by a bang.
Rin’s eyes flutter closed. He can’t listen to this. He can’t watch.
He knows this all too well. He knew it all along.
The universe was wrong. Itoshi Rin was never cut out to be someone’s soulmate.
“We’re missing it…”
Your back is turned to him but all he can imagine is the terrible expression you must be making right now, twisted in sadness and anger. The worse image is a completely blank face—unfeeling and cold. He doesn’t even want to think about it.
Booms echo in the distance yet all he can focus on is the faint hum in his ears, the horrible churning in his stomach and the fog of guilt clouding his head.
“I’m sorry,” he says so quietly that he’s sure you can’t even hear him under the deep, bellowing explosions over the horizon.
He doesn’t remember the last time he apologized for anything like this. Being cold and aloof was just in his nature. Never before had he felt like it was necessary to be remorseful for the way he is—for how he was made to be.
The slight tremble of your shoulders and the way you use the back of your sleeves to wipe tears from your eyes force the words out of him before he can stop it. He tells you again,
“I’m sorry.”
He weakly attempts to grab you by the arms, holding you from behind so he can make you look at him. You jerk away fast as lightning, knocking him away as you swivel around to glare.
“Why didn’t you come?” You demand. There’s anger shaking in your voice. Rin doesn’t know how to respond to it, not when you’ve always been so understanding and kind. Perhaps he was too cruel for you if he was going to break you this way.
“I got caught up with—”
“With football, right?” You laugh bitterly, taking a generous step back. Hurt pours from every inch of your expression and all it does is make his heart ache.
“Stop,” he suddenly snaps. You flinch at his tone and shrink back, only adding to his guilt. He always had the worst temper. “Don’t be like this. You know it was important,” he explains, gentler this time. Softer, trying to coax you back over.
There’s a beat of complete silence, save for the hollowed explosions in the distance. Rin blinks at you a couple times before his frayed nerves finally calm again. And then he realizes something terrible.
The look in your eyes, the deflation of your shoulders—this is what utter defeat looks like. For a moment deja vu rushes through his blood, bringing him back to a time when he too felt as miserable as you.
Every year he’s had the opportunity to read your expression: I’m tired of waiting. But he always foolishly assumed you would still wait around for him forever. That your patience would be as infinite as the stars in the sky. That just because he had the privilege of having his name scrawled down your pinky, he would be guaranteed to have you.
It was disgustingly selfish.
Just as he opens his mouth to apologize again, you storm up to him and shove the piece of paper roughly into his chest. With the closed gap, he can clearly see the tears streaming down your face illuminated by warm lanterns.
“Just forget it.”
“Wait—” He catches your wrist as you push past him, stopping you in your tracks again despite your struggle to get away. “Come on, I said I’m sorry!”
“Rin,” you sniffle, voice breaking with just the syllable of his name. It makes him falter. “I’m tired.”
“But—”
“You can’t even spare me one night? Just this one night in the entire year?” You breathe, no longer trying to dance around the subject. “What is it with you? What are you so afraid of?”
Being put in the spotlight never bothered Rin before. It was easy enough to ignore when all his life he was watched carefully. But it’s different with you; you’re the only one looking at him in this moment yet it feels like the weight of a million pairs of eyes at once.
An answer comes quickly to his mind, almost natural. He knows exactly what’s wrong with him.
He’s afraid of being left behind again. Of being hurt. Rin is terrified of love and being loved because he’s too pathetically fragile.
The pieces of his heart are clumsily glued together and he’s scared that even the smallest turbulence would send it shattering into a billion shards again. He doesn’t know how to put himself back together properly anymore.
Itoshi Sae permanently fucked him up.
Though they were on slightly better terms now, the scars would always haunt him. The simple solution is to shut everyone else out, to protect the weak heart he harbours.
If he told you that, would you understand? Or would you try and claw his name off your skin?
You take his silence as an answer and pry away from him again, holding yourself protectively—guarding yourself from the catastrophe that follows Rin wherever he goes.
“Goodbye, Rin.”
He doesn’t watch you go.
The nearest bench becomes his temporary home. He could do hundreds of plays in a football game and never tire, but for some reason your disdain has sucked every ounce of energy from his body.
It doesn’t register that he’s still holding the paper you forced into his hands until it crinkles in his hold. He slowly unfolds it revealing ink sloppily smeared across the page.
And then he reads it. Again. And again. And again, until it’s shaking in his hold. Until the dull ache in his heart feels like the pierce of a knife.
Rin doesn’t know what to do anymore. He’s always had one clear goal for his entire life, but now everything is all muddled. Messy, like everything else he touches.
He turns everything into a disaster.
Does he chase after you and risk having his fragile heart broken all over again? Does he risk being left behind or does he close off the gate for that option entirely? He could sit in his cowardice and never change, preserving his heart forever in this moment of time; a polaroid in the slideshow of his mortality.
There’s a familiarity to this all. Perhaps he had lived through this decision a million lives before this. Maybe he would live through it again an infinite amount of times, so long as it was your name etched into his skin.
Was he as messed up in this life as he was in every other?
If he had ruined everything in this life, if he made the wrong choice and drove you away in hatred until you drew your last breath, then maybe he could make it all up to you in the next one.
Or, if that were the case, maybe he was born into this world only to love you—to make up for the millenia where he ran away.
Rin’s legs have never moved so fast. Not in football. Not even from his brother. If you were the light at the end of the tunnel then he would keep chasing you forever, he thinks. Until his wounded heart gave out.
Of all the stupid decisions he’s made in his life, have any of them amounted to anything? He’s going to give it one last try. One more chance to prove to himself that not everything he touches burns to ashes.
“Wait!”
You visibly startle, eyes wide as you turn to see Rin dashing toward you. He doesn’t give you even a moment to ask questions, to wonder why he’s coming back to break your heart again.
You’re engulfed in a hug faster than you can blink, stumbling back from the force of his body colliding with yours until your sandals get kicked off your feet.
“Rin?” You murmur his name in disbelief, breathless even though you weren’t the one sprinting down the road.
“Just give me one more chance,” he stammers out. You can feel the rapid rise and fall of his shoulders as he holds you and fights for air simultaneously. Your hands twitch at your sides but you remain lifeless in his arms.
He tries again: “Let me prove it to you. Let me prove that it wasn’t some freak accident that led me to you. That my name on your skin is meant to be there.”
“Don’t do this,” you tell him quietly, lips brushing against his ear as you speak. “I don’t want to be loved and feared at the same time.”
“But…” Rin squeezes your body against his, almost desperately. Clinging to what he has ruined. “For once in my life, I want something more.”
I don’t want to be alone anymore.
You hesitantly shift, hands slowly trailing up his back until your body is curling against his. He can trace the outline of your body against his, like a puzzle piece that he was missing slotted perfectly in his grasp.
“I thought my soulmate would only slow me down and break me. I was wrong. I know that now.”
He slowly rocks your bodies back and forth. You pull away until your eyes meet his, red with tears. It’s the messiest he has ever seen you, but his heart refuses to be still. It aches.
Beautiful. It’s the only word he can describe you with. It didn’t matter if you were lit up under the wondrous sky, or handing him coffee in a crowded café, or sobbing in his arms.
You would only ever be his infinitely beautiful soulmate.
It’s the only constant he would have in this life and every other, even if you were to break his heart. It would be the single greatest achievement in his time, above football, above any of his petty competitions—that your name is etched down his pinky.
It scares him. It thrills him.
With the distant roar of fireworks, he kisses you. And you allow him, hiccuping against his lips as you cry.
You stay like that for a long time, listening to the hollow shockwaves of fireworks exploding miles away. He’s the first to draw back, raking in shallow breaths. You chase him, finding solace against his lips once more but not fully indulging him with another kiss.
“Do you fear me?” You whisper into his mouth.
“More than anything,” he tells you.
“Do you love me?”
After a moment of contemplation, he answers,
“More than anything.”
You nod slowly, awkwardly pulling away from him and taking a step back. It’s your first kiss and you don’t know where you’re supposed to look anymore. Rin stops your nervous shifting with his hand swooping under your chin.
“One year. I promise.” You look at him in confusion, so he continues. “Next year, when the season and my contract are over, I’ll meet you there. At the pond.”
You seem skeptical still, with your brows knitted together and a lost haze in your eyes. He raises his pinky, the one with your name forever grafted into the skin, and offers it to you.
“I pinky promise.”
It’s so ridiculous, wearing his heart on his sleeve with something he learned about on playgrounds when he was a child. A pinky promise shouldn’t mean any more than the words he has already spoken. But for some reason, your eyes light up.
He feels nothing but relief when your pinkies lock together.
“Okay,” you breathe.
“You’ll wait for me?”
“Rin.” His name leaves you in a breathless laugh that makes his world spin. It sounds so tired yet so sweet. “I’ve been waiting all my life.”
“I’m sorry,” he says once more for good measure. You nod. A wordless acceptance.
Itoshi Rin is your soulmate. It’s not like that fact will ever change no matter the time, no matter the distance.
─── ・ 。゚☆: *.☽ .* :☆゚. ───
2023
Fate is a funny thing. Soulmates are a funny thing.
The universe threw Rin curveball after curveball, beating him down until he was nothing but a husk heavenly built for one purpose only: beat Sae. Beat Itoshi Sae.
There were times when he would lay awake at night wondering why he was given this life, why he was thrust into hardship and hurt and betrayal. How could something so perfect, something so all-knowing, be so cruel?
For as long as the name had been grafted into his skin, he resented the idea of a soulmate.
He hated the idea that only one person in the world would be his eternal weakness. That one day, one person would hold every piece of his soul in their hands. Even then, his soulmate was the other half of him—his salvation. His downfall.
They would know every inch of his skin. Every bleeding wound of his heart. Every bruise and scar along his legs from cleats and nails and gravel. Having a soulmate meant having every part of him exposed, to be judged and worshiped at the same time.
At your hands, though, he’s certain this is what he was born for—to spend the rest of his days by your side even if you were doing something as mundane as catching frogs together.
“You’re scaring them,” you hiss quietly.
Your fingers sink into the pond and Rin watches your reflections ripple as water fills your palms. Your faces contort and meld into one being. In some ways, it’s a familiar feeling—to have been intertwined with you since his very conception.
“You’re terrible at this.”
“It’s your fault!”
“Right,” he deadpans. “You haven’t caught a single one all night.”
“You were late,” you remind him with a huff, cheeks inflated. “Before you got here I was catching frogs all night. Coincidence?”
Rin makes another noise, something akin to a snort. But he doesn’t acknowledge your statement, instead reaching over to gingerly roll the sleeves of your yukata up to your elbows.
“Are you always so sloppy? Your sleeves are getting all wet.”
You glare at him from the side, delivering a deadly warning. “Are you always such a pain in the ass?”
“I get it, I get it. I said I was sorry for being late. Nii-chan really wanted to try that new ice cream place downtown.”
Your gaze drifts to him in the shimmering reflection, watching his smile soften at the mention of his big brother. It was wonderful that they were trying to patch things up.
Sae had decided to come home after all, promising Rin that they would play together again once they both took a well deserved break.
You could tell that Rin was trying his best not to make a big deal out of it, but the way he cried into your shoulder later that night said it all.
“I feel bad having you come all the way out here just to see me. Your brother is back in Japan isn’t he?”
“Yeah. And he wants to meet you.”
You nearly fall over. “What?”
“Please don’t look so starstruck about that. I feel sick.”
Laughing, you recentre yourself, sitting back on your heels with your hands on your knees. “Sorry, sorry! It’s not that…”
Rin raises a brow. “We don’t have to if you don’t want to.”
“It’s just—” you fumble, cheeks burning hot at the idea of being introduced to Rin’s family after all these years. Formally, as his partner. His soulmate. The name they had all known since he was thirteen. “What would I even say to him?”
He looks at you in bewilderment. Then, he snickers, only laughing harder when you smack his arm.
“Don’t worry about that,” he assures, reaching out to pat the top of your head. “Just be yourself. My family will love you.”
“Thank you,” you whisper, studying your reflections in the water with a soft smile. You’re staring right back at yourself, but Rin is only looking at you.
“I haven’t done anything special.”
“You lit up my world,” you laugh, turning back up to look at him properly. You make a mini explosion with your hands. “Boom! Like that. A firework.”
“You’re too corny,” he murmurs in embarrassment, turning his head away to hide his flushed face. “Can’t you explain it like a normal person?”
“No can do,” you tell him, voice gentler this time. After a pause, you shuffle your sandals around in the mud and take a deep breath. “If you want me to be totally serious…”
You lunge over and tackle him into your arms. He nearly loses his balance holding the both of you upright, stumbling back on his heels before he catches your waist. You don’t seem to share the sentiment of staying pristine, knees digging into the dirt as you squeeze him tighter.
Rin feels his heart catch in his throat the same way you’ve made it for the last six years.
“Thank you. For letting me love you. For being my soulmate.”
His hand is automatically in your hair, scratching your scalp as he smiles into your shoulder.
“I’m sure I gave you nothing but a hard time,” he grumbles.
“But I still love you.”
“Even though you had to wait?”
“Even so.”
“And that I’m a pain in the ass?”
“Even then, I do.”
Rin burrows himself into your neck, hiding his face again. It does a poor job at masking the kind of expression he’s making, though, considering how warm his skin is.
“What if I’m not good enough?”
He feels terrible—guilty that he needs to keep having this conversation with you. But you always comfort him the same way. He hopes you always will.
Drawing his head up with your muddy hands, you dirty his cheeks just to get a glimpse of him. You murmur a half-hearted sorry for making a mess.
Then you’re kissing him.
“I’ll be here to remind you how much I cherish you.”
You nip his bottom lip and he opens wider. You whisper into his mouth,
“And how happy I am that Itoshi Rin was born into this world.”
Itoshi Rin, broken. He who thought that he could never be put back together.
Itoshi Rin, vengeful. He who believed the only happiness that existed for him in this world was to surpass his brother.
Itoshi Rin, who did not believe in his soulmate while staring right at them. And Itoshi Rin, who finally allowed himself to love you wholly, completely, as it was written in the stars.
“I love you,” he says, as if just those three words could encapsulate everything he feels for you.
“Always?” You giggle. He rolls his eyes.
“Wherever you are, and wherever you may be, I will.”
You kiss him one more time for good measure.
“That was corny.”
─── ・ 。゚☆: *.☽ .* :☆゚. ───
2024
“No peeking.”
Rin folds up his piece of paper and hangs it from the bamboo tree. You’re tugging him along before he can even properly check to see if it’s been secured.
“Come on, I don’t want to miss the fireworks!”
He wouldn’t miss them for the world. You’ve always looked the most beautiful under the brightened summer sky.
The wish he scribbled down blows softly in the breeze as both of you rush by, back to the festival where it all began.
7 July 2024. I wish I had the words to tell you how much I love you.
─── ・ 。゚☆: *.☽ .* :☆゚. ───
extra notes. hi! if you made it this far, i'd like to give you the warmest most grateful thank you ever ( ´ ω `)
so, here it is. i've been working on this since last september-ish... for some people that amount of time is not much, but genuinely, i've never devoted so much attention and time to one single fic and i hope i did this one justice. rin has always been a guilty pleasure of mine to write for. i hope this man stays far far away from me until i can stomach even looking at his name again LOL ‾́ ◡ ‾́
also i finally admitted defeat and took out all my pictures and dividers because tumblr was fighting my posts that had any. so... sorry the formatting looks like this
additional tags: @jenoutof10 @hanrinz @itoshiexx lol hi guys it made it out of the drafts i hope you like it
#— whispers in the wind: 1k event ✉️#blue lock x reader#blue lock#blue lock fic#bllk#bllk x reader#bllk fic#itoshi rin#itoshi rin x reader#rin itoshi#rin itoshi x reader#rin x reader#itoshi rin x y/n#itoshi rin x you#itoshi rin fluff#rin itoshi fluff
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𝐃𝐀𝐑𝐋𝐈𝐍𝐆, 𝐘𝐎𝐔𝐑 𝐑𝐈𝐍𝐆!
₊˚ෆ── tags : fluff, slight hurt/comfort, married life, husband & wife, fiancé & fiancee, mentions of kaiser's past (spoiler ig?), mentions of pregnancy, mentions of nudity(no smut), pro athlete!au
₊˚ෆ── including : fiancé!michael kaiser, husband!mikage reo (ft. wife/fiancee! reader)
₊˚ෆ── sum. : hey, where's your ring? why is it off your finger?(should i do part 2. . . ? )
⊹ ִֶָ𓏲࣪𖹭 𝐌𝐈𝐂𝐇𝐀𝐄𝐋 𝐊𝐀𝐈𝐒𝐄𝐑
when it comes to choosing partner, a person that he wishes to spend the rest of his life with, michael kaiser is very careful about it. he has witnessed the darkness behind a failed marriage for so long and decided to never make a mistake in his own, as to not bear the consequences of poor decision. thus, kaiser has always been so full of love and patience when it comes to you. he has always been as gentle as possible whenever he speaks or touches you.
but, everyone has a limit and seems to react negatively to it in the most non suitable moment ever. you knew he might have been so upset and emotionally disturbed with all of the pent up stress, building up from the pressure of the media, his team and more. however, it does not act as an excuse for him to let it all out on you. that night, he was obviously irritated to the point of snapping at you.
he laid on the sofa, sighing heavily as he squeezed his eyes shut, trying to calm himself down from the sudden bubbling anger rushing through his veins at this very moment. he had just return from an interview regarding to his career updates and happened to be rudely bombarded by nosy paparazzis, causing his phone charm to be lost in that moment. the crowd was too much, he can't reach nor search for the charm, not when the guards were shoving him into the van with protective manner. to the others, it might have been a cheap phone charm that he could purchase any time yet to michael kaiser, it holds so much memories, it meant a lot to him. and you.
you heard your fiancé while you were cleaning up the kitchen. excited to see him, you toss your apron onto the marble kitchen island, making your way towards him. perhaps you were too excited to see him that you didn't notice the still wet floor that you mopped minutes ago, ending with you falling onto the floor with a loud thud, sound of picture frame crashing could be heard as you tried to hold onto a surface to balance yourself but grabbed the wrong thing instead. the loud noise startled kaiser, his anger is pumping rapidly in his veins again, rising up from the sofa and make his way toward the noise.
"love— "
"why can't you be quiet for once? you always had to do something to get on my nerve, don't you?"
your eyebrows furrowed upon his taunting words that are hinted with anger. you knew that he's overstimulated by frustration but it still stir the annoyance in you. who is he to snap at you just because he is feeling negatively?
"wow, my bad i guess. didn't know it'd be a crime to be excited to see my fiancé."
kaiser frowned at your words.
"i don't like your tone."
"right, says the one who started being such a bitch."
"watch your mouth— "
"watch yours first, michael kaiser. look, i don't know what had happen during your interview but can you not take it out on me? i'm not a tool for you to release your stress on. you know what? go cool yourself off, until then we'll talk."
you ignored him as he stood there silently. you fetch your cleaning tools and carefully deal with the broken pieces, placing the picture back on its place while gathering the ruined pieces of broken picture frame into the dust pan. michael only watch your movements, not even a word spoken. he knew you're right and listened to your words as he remove himself from the spot, heading out for a walk.
kaiser spent quite a long moment as he sit by the lazy chair perched up in the garden where you've planted various flowers. the warm white light shining onto each petals and leaves of the flowers, making it appearing more romantic to look at. kaiser's fingers fiddle with his engagement ring hugging his ring finger as he zone out. his mind is clouded with hazy thoughts that are rapidly messing up his mind at this moment, be it from his past or present. he rethink of his behaviour toward you moments ago and sighed heavily. such violent behaviour his, it almost resemble to his abusive male parent back in his childhood.
growing up in violent atmosphere, pain is all he ever learn about. he yearn for love ; to love and to be loved. he spent his childhood imagining what a love would feel like ; is it true that motherly love feels like heaven? is it true that fatherly love feels like you're in the safest universe ever? they said, parents are the hero of every children, yet, why does his abused him and neglected him?
was it because his parent's love were meant to be painful as you yearn more for it? was it because love was never real? or worse, was it because he is just an unlovable child? if love truly exist, why does he need to suffer in order to get a taste of it? they said love is sweet, yet why was it bitter to him? they said love is warm, yet why was he lying on the cold floor as warm fist pounding his fragile body? they said love is soft, yet why was it full of thorns as he held it in his palms?
that was what he was taught about love from the unhealthy surroundings he was locked in. when he met you, he discover what true love is like. he learned that love is when you let out quirky laughs that tingle his ears yet warms up his chest as he laughs along with you ; he learned that love is when you learn about soccer trick online to impress him just for you to clumsily trip, telling him that you'd love to learn more of his passion ; he learned that love is when you hold him tightly as his vulnerable side was exposed when he had failed his own expectation, validating his emotions and never resort to violence to make him quit from feeling low. love with you is what he has always read about on the fairytales storybook that he secretly kept in his room when he was a kid.
you came to him and show him that love isn't always a hard gain yet he hurt you with his action. the thought of you walking away from him suffocate him. he knew he is only imagining about it yet to not see your smile, to not hear your laughter, to not smell your heavenly fragance, to not touches your skin and to not share your warmth is something he could never want to lose.
"god, i fucked up." he cussed under his breathe as he runs into the house, looking for you.
he entered the shared bedroom, heart drop at the sight of your engagment ring placed upon your vanity table. you're not in the room, which adds up to his overthinking. when he heard the soft patterings of shower waters hitting the floor, that's when he knew you're in there. it confirmed his guess when he heard soft sniffles coming from there as he leaned his ear against the door. he was quick to undo his garments and grab your ring, entering the bathroom as quietly as possible.
"darling?"
his heart soften yet saddened at the sight of your crying nude form, standing under the shower head as you try your best to not let out too much sniffles. thank god you're still with him. he makes his way toward you, engulfing you into his chest, holding onto you as his lips raining kisses unto your wet skin.
"please forgive me, my love. i'm sorry for hurting you." he apologised, rubbing your back softly to comfort you.
"must've hurt your ego to apologise to me, huh? serve you right." you countered his words with a hint of sadness in it.
"it hurts even more if i lose you, love. i never want to lose you."
he whispered, lowering his lips to capture yours, apologising to you silently. you closed your eyes, savoring his kiss, letting his lips stiches apology unto yours, a promise to never hurt you again. he parted his lips from you, eyes looking into yours as his palm make its way to caress your cheeks. his hands then moves itself to grab yours, kissing each knuckles before he slides your ring back to its place. he sealed it with another kiss on the ring.
"please, don't leave me, love."
"i won't, darling. i'm here, forever and always."
⊹ ִֶָ𓏲࣪𖹭 𝐌𝐈𝐊𝐀𝐆𝐄 𝐑𝐄𝐎
mikage reo, a man who was born with a silver spoon in his mouth along with a face blessed by the heaven. he has always knew that his life is well promising and had nothing to worry about. he has always been so generous of his money, be it to use on himself or use it on his friends. just as when he was with his toys when he was a toddler, always sharing it with his play dates or childhood friends. when he reached the age of entering teenager life, he is still so kind when it comes to money matters until it was when he met his friend, nagi seishiro. for once in his life, he dislike sharing, nagi is his friend and nobody could have him.
that goes on until the day he met you. when it comes to you, not even his beloved close friend could have a touch. for the very first time in his life, he is not kind with nagi when it comes to you. nagi wants to play games with you because he heard you're good at it? no need, reo is hiring a famour gamer to play with nagi. nagi would like to hear about your plant pet? no need, reo is buying him a whole nursery of cactus that varies from different species of cactus. nagi was suspicious of reo but he couldn't complaint because at least he is getting something better to ease his boredom.
reo even make it obvious to the other girls that he is yours the moment both of you made it official. reo is well known for using aesthetic hard covers for his phone but when he started dating you, he changed it to clear case, polaroid of you that's his favourite will be placed in it, displaying to others and showing off his lovely lover.
what about you? how do they know that you are mikage reo's lover? it's easy, it's those luxury branded items that you're wearing. he always make sure that most of it are custom made and limited item. it may cause him to spend a little bit extra but hey, if it's you, he'll even sacrifice the world to make sure you're always pretty and well taken care of. he knew how you love to care for yourself from the way you do your skincare, haircare, daily exercises, makeup and dressing up. he loves it as well and enjoys to indulge into it. as long as you're happy, he is happy as well.
that was until today, when he saw a frown on your pretty face. it wasn't common for you to get upset so easily, he wonder what could've cause such discomfort for you. is it the month of your menstrual cycle begin? no way, that'll be on another 2 weeks, he keep tracks on them. is it because your boss was being harsh on you? no way, he started up a business for you to run and support your cute cafe that sell fresh pastries, sweet flowers and refreshing coffee. is it because your favourite show was postponed because of the billing? no way, he made sure to purchase a year worth of membership with the highest graphic quality for you every year. so, what is it that bother you? he makes his way toward you and holds your hand only for you to pulls it away from him quickly, panic eyes staring at his. he noticed how you hide your hand behind you.
"hubby! hi!" you stuttered a little, trying your best to hide whatever you'd like to hide from him.
"you good, dearest? why won't you let me hold your hand?" he asked, his hand moving to grab yours again.
"my skin is too dry, it'd be unpleasant for you to hold them." you told him, removing your hands from his again.
"what a nonsense, you've always been perfect, dear." he praised, leaning in to press a soft kiss to your forehead.
"my, thank you. aren't you praising me too much, reo?"
"mm, never, dear."
he kisses your lips this time, distracting you from his hand caressing yours, pulling away when he finally caught unto the reason of you hiding your hands from him. he looks into your eyes, scrunching up his nose when he noticed you're getting a bit shy from his full attention and affection.
"what?" you pouted.
"you're so cute and silly too, dear." reo teased, giggling when you playfully frowned at him.
he fish out a velvet box from his back pocket, showing it to you as he opens them. inside, is your wedding ring, the one that you thought you had lost it. you gasp and look at him.
"how?! i thought i lost it!"
"i took them for a cleaning, remember? how could you be so forgetful, dear."
reo smiles as he gets onto one knee, holding your hand gently as he slips it back onto your ring finger. standing up, he kisses the back of your hand. he is so amused with your expression at the moment, all flustered just like how he proposed to you before.
"why were you not telling the truth while ago, hm?" reo questioned.
"knowing you, you'd buy new ones if i truly lost it— "
"why, of course. i'll buy you as many rings as possible, as long as you're happy."
of course he would, how could you doubt him? he is your husband who love to spoil you a little too much.
"thank you, but i'd love to lower the usage of our money, you know?"
"why? is your cafe's billing getting higher? i'll— "
"reo hubby, no. little mikage is on the way, of course we should be spending wisely, right?"
"oh, right, yea— wait. what?!"
you laughed at his reaction. my, your husband is so entertaining.
"yes, dear. we're having a baby!"
reo laughs happily as he hugs you, carefully yet tightly.
"i'm calling nagi, he needs to know that he is an uncle now!"
and you know you did the right thing when you accepted his ring of promises and afraid of losing it. he promised to make you the happiest person ever and he did fulfilled his promises. or should you say, he has always been fulfilling his promises and sealed his promise to eternity.
© HIRAGIKISS 2024 | do not repost my contents to any other platforms.
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#blue lock fanfiction#bllk fanfic#blue lock fluff#bllk fluff#bllk fic#bllk drabbles#blue lock fic#blue lock drabbles#blue lock x reader#blue lock x you#blue lock x female reader#bllk x reader#bllk x you#michael kaiser fluff#michael kaiser x reader#kaiser x reader#kaiser x you#kaiser fluff#mikage reo fluff#mikage reo x reader#mikage reo x you#reo x reader#reo x you#reo blue lock#kaiser blue lock#reo x reader fluff
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⟡⋆.˚˚₊‧꒰ა ⋆。°⋅˚₊‧ ୨୧ ‧₊˚ ⋅
Itoshi Rin x Reader
Post argument fluff
———————————————————————————————————————
"Why are you so clingy? Get lost, disappear for all I care."
Those were the last words you heard before your fiancé walked out of your shared home, heading to who knows where.
⋆.˚˚₊‧꒰ა ♱ ໒꒱ ‧₊˚⊹ ࣪ ˖
Hearing those sharp words made you feel as if your heart was stabbed a million times. As a result, you chose to sleep on the couch.
As you lay on the couch, engulfed by the dim light of the living room, you couldn't stop the tears from bursting right through your eyes. The scene replaying over and over again made it hurt more than it already did.
To avoid thinking about it more, a decision was made: to sleep. Just as you were about to close your eyes, you hear the front door open and shut, along with the light pads that came from your fiancé seemingly getting closer and closer to where you're at. Not wanting to pay it any mind, you pretended to sleep. Until you feel a pair of eyes staring at you from behind. You were bothered, of course, but chose to close your eyes nonetheless.
A cold gust of wind flew by in the moment of silence until you felt the cushion of the couch dip lower and a pair of hands wrap around you. Surprised, you turned around. "Rin?" you asked. "You sh-" Just as you were about to speak again, you were cut off. "Why sleep here?" Everything went silent for a minute. "I figured I'd sleep here, for space" you replied, hearing this made the teal-eyed man feel more guilty, making him tighten his grip on your waist a bit more.
"You shouldn't be sleeping here. Go to bed; you have a big day tomorrow, remember?" you added, hoping to shake him off. Another wave of silence. After about a minute, he spoke, "Are you still mad? I'm sorry, I didn't mean any of those things. I was just tired and frustrated..." His voice was shaky as he buried his face more into the crook of your neck. "It's okay. I know I can be overly clingy at times. I was just so excited to finally spend time with you, but I guess I overreacted," hearing that reply broke him more, as if you're blaming yourself for something that's his fault. "Now, go to bed; you have to wake up early." He felt that you were uncomfortable, so he unlatched himself and walked away, leaving you alone in the dim room.
After changing his clothes, he went and got ready for bed, and fuck, was it cold and lonely. "So this is what it's like," he mumbled as he laid down on the cold bed, looking at your spot where it lies cold and empty. Seeing that horrid view made his heart drop to his stomach. Hours passed by as he twisted and turned, trying every possible way to make himself fall asleep. From turning the lamp on and off to making pillow figures of what is assumed to be you (creepy, but let's face it, bro's coping), and unfortunately, none worked. Oh my god, he felt like a Victorian kid dying from a severe illness, laid down on the bed, huffing and sweating with worry. Not wanting to put up with this feeling, he marched downstairs to where you were sleeping, and man, he didn't even spare a second as he immediately jumped to cuddle you, arms around your waist with his head nuzzled in your chest and neck and all. "Goddamn, this is way better," he screamed, mentally, as he inhaled your scent that he oh so missed.
With all the shuffling around, you wake up, feeling a figure trapping you. Readjusting your eyes to the surroundings, you look down to see Rin all snuggled up next to you. You tap his shoulder. "Why are you here? I told you to sleep on the bed..." you say, groggily. To which he replies, "I just can't sleep... I know you're upset, but please, let me sleep with you," as he looks up, his face all teary. "I'm sorry, please don't avoid me... I'll do better. I swear," he adds, tightening his hold around your waist.
Unable to resist such a cute face, you sighed, cupping his face as you peppered kisses on his poor face. "You promise?" you asked, your voice soft, almost a whisper. "Mhm, I promise," he replied, leaning into your touch. "Do you want to go on a date tomorrow," he added. I'd love to, baby, but you're busy tomorrow." "Skipping practice for a day won't hurt," he chuckled. You responded with a hum as you pressed yourself more, burying his face into your neck and chest, to which he let his hands roam under your clothes, rubbing circles on your back while the other sneakily fondled your ass. You chuckled at the response. "How about a little café date after we go grocery shopping?" you asked, and he replied with a muffled hum.
He peeked his head. "We're good now, right?" he asked. "Yeah, we're all good now, baby," to which he smiled and added, "I love you." You replied with the sweetest, "I love you too." Upon hearing that, he nuzzled right back into your chest.
⋆.˚˚₊‧꒰ა ♱ ໒꒱ ‧₊˚⊹ ࣪ ˖
Guess who'll be walking on the produce isle with a big smile on his face? Definitely a man named Itoshi Rin.
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gone, gone / thank u ☆
(n) — you’re a fool to think sae is anything more than a summer fling
dating sae is eating hard candy & crying when you get a toothache.
he’s half boy half heartbeat—the summer you met he was gold wind in a wheat field, hive full of honey & mouth full of stars. he swept you off your feet & kissed you silly by the riverbank, hands on your hips & teeth on your tongue as rose-blood crept up your throat. you love candy & you love kissing and being with sae is both so you pray his lips trace your skin forever.
sae is half boy half headache.
it’s been three days since you’ve last heard from him & communication is key so you don’t lock your heart away. pride is an ideology for the weak—you suck up your ego & cast it to the marigolds so now you’re texting sae with cherry bruised fingers. there’s an ache in your palms & it should be from the weight of your phone but you fear it’s akin to the weight of the world. sae never texts back.
sae is half boy half heartache.
summer is fleeting. cherry fields, brown sugar & your heart peppered into pink sheets of paper. you cast it to the current & pray that one day you’ll forget to remember the taste of sae’s lips whenever you stare into the water. there are thistles on your ankles and your knees are aching but the gash on your thighs will never compare to the split of your heart. you hope you won’t bleed forever.
sae is no boy, all heartbreak.
© ─ heartkaji ; do not steal, copy, edit, translate or reupload
#✷ ─ [ 𝐌𝐀𝐑𝐒 𝐖𝐑𝐈𝐓𝐄𝐒 ]#blue lock#blue lock x reader#blue lock fanfiction#bllk#bllk headcanons#bllk x reader#bllk fanfic#sae x reader#itoshi sae#itoshi sae x reader#sae itoshi#sae itoshi x reader#itoshi sae x you#itoshi sae x y/n#sae itoshi x you#sae itoshi x y/n#itoshi brothers#sae headcanons#bllk imagines#blue lock imagines#sae blue lock#blue lock sae#bllk sae#blue lock headcanons#bllk x you#blue lock x you#bllk fluff#bllk fic#sae fluff
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What he finds most attractive about you
Prompt: Headcanons on what the bllk boys find most attractive about you.
A/N: Some of these characters could be OOC, so keep that in mind.
Featuring: Rin, Sae, Isagi, Bachira, Reo, and Niko
Rin
What does he find most attractive about you? Your voice.
It took a bit for Rin to warm up to you fully, but when he did, he started to notice how calming your voice is to him. For him, it’s like an angel singing him a lullaby, his favorite music to listen to. If you are insecure about how you sound, don’t be because he genuinely finds comfort in the sound of your voice. It’s the fact that hearing you lets him know that you’re there with *him*. He listens intently to you every time you talk, paying close attention to the pitch of your voice and letting it calm down all of his nerves. When you talk about something that excites you, he will slightly smile and wonder how high your voice would go. If you were to have a bad day, he would know right away just by the tone of your voice no matter how hard you try to hide it. When he’s the one having a bad day, he always finds himself looking for you for comfort and letting you comb your fingers through his hair, while consoling him. He feels as if you are the only person in the whole world who understands him and won’t judge him (and leave to Spain 🙄). If you can sing, that is a HUUUGE bonus for him. He would be pretty down bad for you and will shyly ask you to sing to him. He knows he can be a lot to handle, so he’s appreciative of you for being there. Even though Rin doesn’t always outwardly express how much he appreciates you, he definitely shows it through his actions.
“Being around you is different…God, I don’t know how to put this into words, but all I know is that I want to be close to you forever.”
Sae
What does he find most attractive about you? Your sense of humor.
He freaking adores your sense of humor. This guy has the personality of a broccoli, so you being the funny person you are really switches up his usual routine. He always makes sure you’re around to make everything feel so lively; he feels like a “normal person” with you, it’s as if he forgets he’s a celebrity. When he’s abroad for a game, he misses you a lot and wonders what shenanigans you’re up to. He especially thinks about you A LOT during boring interviews, wondering what bizarre thing you would say to turn it into something fun. He makes it a top priority to call you when he has free time—this is like a way for him to unwind and just giggle the night away after a game or other important matters. He will sometimes purposely be mean to you in a playful manner just to get a reaction from you. He often chuckles to himself reminiscing the times when you said something stupid that randomly popped into his head. Some of his teammates wonder if they’re in some sort of alternate universe. Like…Sae Itoshi is laughing? No must be hearing things. Except Shidou though, he will tease Sae to no end.
“Life never gets boring when I’m with you. Feels like I’ve known you for years, lifetimes even. You better stay close to me because I’m not letting you go, got that?”
Isagi
What does he find most attractive about you? Your smile and laughter.
He finds it very attractive every time you laugh and flash that bright smile. It makes him feel very special and reassured knowing how happy you are around him. If you’re insecure to laugh or smile, he will look at you as if you are crazy and shower you with compliments until the end of time. He doesn’t fully understand why you would be insecure because for him he gets all fuzzy and warm inside when he sees you cheerful. Even though he tells an unfunny joke, he can always count on you to fill in the awkward silence. Your laughter is like a soft melody to his ears that will never bore him, and that smile just makes all the negativity leave his entire body—it’s like a reminder of how much he is cared for. AND OH MY GOSH if you have dimples, he will be so down bad for you. He will do everything in his power to just make you smile. If you’re insecure about your dimples, he would be so confused as to why. He will kiss them very often just so you can feel good about them, along with his sweet compliments of how cute they look.
“You must be some sort of magician because every time I see you, everything else just disappears. Hey! I’m trying to flirt with you, don’t laugh! Or do… Damn, you're too cute…”
Bachira
What does he find most attractive about you? You dancing carefree.
Bachira gets all excited and energetic every time you dance. It’s the way you freely move like there’s no one else around and how you dance so effortlessly as you sway your hips and wave your arms everywhere. And your face is so relaxed while doing so. Bachira could watch you all day and be absolutely mesmerized by you as if you hypnotized him, even though he much prefers to be dancing with you. He has Just Dance downloaded and will have you play it with him to see who’s a better dancer. He also has an entire playlist of songs he remembers that you love so he can see you get all giddy. I can see Bachira practicing kpop dances to impress you if you’re a fan of kpop. He likes to call himself your “personal idol”. His favorite thing is to have you close to him so that he can hold you and gaze into your eyes while he sweet talks to you.
“Y/N! Just learned a new dance move! Impressed right? As your personal idol, I have to have these kinds of moves down, I gotta keep up with you, yknow? How else will I dance with my Galway Girl?”
(Yes it is an ed sheeren reference)
Reo
What does he find most attractive about you? Your nose.
Reo is the very observant type, so it didn’t take long for him to notice the way your nose would perk up every time you smile or scrunch up when you get excited or disgusted by something. He thinks it's a very cute charm you have and reminds you every time by giving you a little peck on the nose. Not only that but he will also “boop” your nose or rub his on yours occasionally. He feels incredibly special since he is hopefully one of the few to notice this. Will definitely gatekeep this in case others also want to boop your nose because those boops are only reserved for him! He will talk about it all to Nagi though.
“Y/N! Come here! Closerrrrr. Scooch on closer! Boop! There she is. You’re like a sweet little bunny, my bunny.”
Niko
What does he find most attractive about you? Your eyes.
At first, he did not think much about you or your eyes until you both became friends and later on realized how pretty your eyes are. Canonically, he believes you can read someone’s personality if you look into their eyes. And what he reads in your eyes is how caring and genuine you are. You sometimes catch his gaze linger a little bit longer than usual, so you tend to snap him out of his thoughts. Most of the time he does it without even realizing it, which results in him feeling embarrassed afterwards. When you’re at his place, he’ll turn on the TV to watch an anime in hopes of just focusing on the show and not creep you out with his constant staring. That is until his eyes wander onto yours once again. Sometimes if he’s feeling good, he’ll secretly push his bangs up a bit so he can get a clearer look at you. If you both have been together for a while though, he won’t cover his eyes around you and will only be reserved for you. On dates, there will be times when you both just hold onto each other's hands and stare into one another’s eyes. When you’re both going to bed, he’ll lightly kiss your eyelids shut before you both sleep. He believes it’ll help you have good dreams at night.
“Maybe it’s the way your eyes hold so many mysteries that makes me feel this way. Or perhaps it is curiosity? I don’t know…It’s like trying to study the universe, so many things to discover.”
#blue lock#isagi x reader#rin x reader#sae x reader#Bachira x reader#Reo x reader#Niko x reader#bllk x reader#bllk fic#blue lock fluff#My first fic. I think this turned out better than i initially thought so woop woop
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Itoshi who??? . ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁˖ . ݁ . ݁₊
. ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁˖ . ݁ . ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁˖ . ݁ . ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁˖ . ݁ . ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁˖ . ݁ . ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁˖ . ݁ . ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁˖ . ݁
summary: rin and sae both like you. In the end, no matter how much you care about them both, you’ll have to decide!
BLUE LOCK M.LIST | who would you pick? 💌
“If you’d rather be a ‘pick me up’ for some lukewarm fluke then go ahead.”
“Sae don’t say that, he’s your brother…”
“Well he’s a shitty one, he wants everything I have, including you.” Sae was furious when he found out that you and Rin had gone out together during his time off from Blue Lock. As soon as he heard the news he called you to say he had booked a flight for you to visit him in Spain. No matter where he was in the world, and no matter how much it would cost him, he always found a way to bring you back to him.
He grabbed your hand and pulled you to the balcony of his apartment, looking over Madrid. “I’m sorry sae, this is all my fault.”
“Don’t blame yourself, Rin just wants you to pity him and I won’t let that happen to you.” His hand in yours tightened and his eyes gazed into yours. You’ve known him long enough to see past that cold exterior, and see that his gaze is loving.
Sae’s admission of love to you felt different than Rins. He wanted the softening of his eyes to tell you he felt happy, safe, even loved in your presence. The strength he used to hold your hand and pull you closer into him telling you that he would keep you safe. The Madrid skyline serving as proof to the life he could give to you. The comfort and luxury you could find in his world. Sae wanted you to be part of his life, and experience all of his love. He wanted you to step into his world, and let him give you everything he could.
“Of course he’d say that, what a shitty brother.”
“He’s just frustrated is all, this is my fault really, I don’t want you guys fighting.” You spoke as you sat down beside him over the rocks. The oceans mist dusting lightly over you both, carrying the serene scent of salt and earth, Rin’s scent. As soon as Rin found out that Sae had demanded you back to Spain with him, he was furious. He asked you to meet him at the pier before you left. No matter what he was doing, no matter how long he had with you, he always found the time to be with you.
“This isn’t your fault at all, he just can’t stand not getting what he wants.” Rin took both your hands in his, urging you to face him. “I love you. I can’t let you blame yourself for this.”
Rins admission of love to you felt different than Sae’s. He was trying to make those three words shoot through his gaze into yours and find their way into your heart. He looked at you like he’d just seen an angel, as if you were the most perfect thing imaginable. In his eyes you could do no wrong. His hands in yours, holding on tight as if you might try to let go. He wanted to keep you with him, you being a reason for him to keep going, stronger than revenge. Rin wanted his life and all of his love to revolve around you. He wanted to step into your world, and let him give you everything he could.
I’d choose Rin ngl like yes baby let me save you from all your sorrows 🥹 -aria
This is my 2nd Sae post of the day!! Crazy!!!
#blue lock headcanons#bllk fluff#bllk imagines#bllk x reader#blue lock#blue lock x reader#fanfic#bllk itoshi sae#blue lock itoshi sae#sae itoshi#itoshi rin#blue lock itoshi rin#bllk rin#bllk itoshi rin#itoshi sae x reader#itoshi rin x reader#itoshi rin headcanons#itoshi sae#itoshi sae headcanons#bllk fic#bllk headcanons#blue lock fanfiction#blue lock fluff#blue lock x you#bllk x you
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perv shidou (not closet because let's be real)
cw: dub con touching & groping
perv isagi | perv barou | perv nagi
--
Shidou leans back in his chair, hands supporting his head and feet propped up on the desk, content to watch you struggle with erasing the top of the chalkboard.
“Hey asshole, you know we’re both on classroom duty right?”
He grins. “Seems like you got it.”
You lean up on your tiptoes and it gives you a few inches but there’s still over a foot of board left unerased. You turn around to give him a glare, hands on your hips. You must think yourself intimidating.
“Clearly, I don’t.”
Shidou shrugs.
You huff, turning back to face the chalkboard. He sits up, watching with rapt attention now as you start to do little hops to reach higher up. His gaze trails from the bounce of your breasts to the fluttering hem of your skirt.
You don’t notice Shidou approaching until he’s all up in your business, his tie brushing against your back. When you feel his breath against your neck, you jump back, pressing against the chalkboard.
“Hey! What’s your deal? Ever heard of personal space?” you shove at his chest, but he doesn’t move. In fact, it feels like he’s getting closer, closing in on you.
It’s not your imagination because you feel his whisper in your ear, “I’ll help you if you say my name.”
“Fuck you-”
His hand ghosts over your waist. The sensation is ticklish, but not unpleasant.
“Sh- Shidou,” you stutter.
“Ah-ah,” he tuts. “So close.”
He’s smooth with it, deftly untucking your shirt so his greedy fingers can touch your skin. His hands have a mind of their own now, searing grasp tight around your ribs. His eyes close unconsciously when he gets a whiff of your shampoo.
“Ry- Ryusei,” you whisper breathlessly.
Shidou spins you around and snakes his arms around your waist to hoist you up. The position he has you in, arms circling your torso and your ass pressed to his chest, leaves you mortifyingly powerless.
“Ryusei! Put me down!”
It’s completely a lucky accident that the rest of your shirt slips from its tucked position in your waistband, causing Shidou’s grip to slip. To keep you up, his hands shift to hold your exposed midsection, his fingers digging into the fat of your tummy.
“Oh my god, Ryusei. Let go!”
Shidou can’t help but savor the sound of his name on your tongue, his hands all over you. “If you want me to let go, you better get erasing.”
You do it, moving as quickly as you can, while Shidou milks every second of this. His fingers brush your ribs, murmuring across the sensitive skin of your stomach. He contemplates “accidentally” slipping more to allow his wandering hands further up, just enough so he can brush the underside of your bra. The moment is cut short when your hands come down to tug at his hair.
“I’m done, so put me down.”
He obliges since he’s had his fill for today.
When your feet hit solid ground, you glare up at him. “You could’ve just done it yourself. You didn’t have to put your hands all over me.”
He just shrugs. And I’d do it again.
#noos writes#blue lock x reader#blue lock x y/n#blue lock x you#bllk x y/n#bllk x you#bllk x reader#shidou ryusei#shidou ryuusei x reader#shidou ryusei x reader#shidou x reader#shidou x you#shidou x y/n#blue lock fic#bllk fic
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three words
ft. bachira meguru
"i love you" is a special phrase.
it's something said between those who share a deep emotional bond. it's the three words that bachira desperately wants to tell you.
the phrase isn't something that can be thrown around lightly, in bachira's mind. it's something so meaningful, so emotional that he can't bring himself to say it. it's something that's never been said to him besides from his mother.
and don't get him wrong, he doesn't not love you. you're his first and last love. he knows it. he knows he loves you and that you love him. yet the three words have never been uttered by either of you.
because in a corner deep in his mind, he's afraid. he's afraid you'll eventually leave him, like everyone else does. he's afraid that once he shows exactly how devoted he is to you, you'll say you'd had your fun and leave.
he hopes you won't.
bachira has been seeking for the perfect moment to say those three words, "i love you." to you, and he's figured it out now! once he gets out of the bluelock facility, whenever that'll be, he'll take you out on a nice date.
he'll take you out to a nice cafe, then take you on a stroll. he'll bring you to a nice garden, sit down on a bench beside you, and pull you in, finally telling you. he thinks it's the perfect plan, and it really is!
yet, here he is, ruining his ideal plan at the end of the bluelock vs. u-20 game. he's running up to you, who is coming down from the seating area to the field, holding you in an embrace, and whispering into the crook of your neck.
"i love you. god, i love you so much."
the words repeating. he couldn't care less about his plan when you're here, in his arms, saying it back to him.
"i love you too, meguru.”
happy belated bday to my fav ♡♡♡ please bring him back into the manga :( this idea came to me just as i was gonna fall asleep so it might not be coherent !! as always thank you so much for reading this far, and thank you for 300 notes on my previous fic !! you all deserve hugs ♡
#melofics#bachira x reader#bachira x you#bachira x y/n#bachira meguru x reader#bachira meguru x you#bachira meguru x y/n#meguru bachira x reader#bachira meguru#meguru bachira#blue lock x reader#blue lock x you#blue lock x y/n#blue lock bachira#bllk x you#bllk x reader#bllk x y/n#bllk x female reader#bllk bachira#bachira bllk#bachira blue lock#blue lock#bllk#blue lock fic#blue lock fluff#bllk fluff#bachira#bachira fluff#bllk fic
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𝐔𝐡, 𝐝𝐢𝐝 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐣𝐮𝐬𝐭…?
FemReader x Nagi Seishiro
Seishiro just really, really missed you. ♡
Warnings: 18+ MDNI • smut • 🌶️ • fluff • both mid twenties & live together • established relationship • it happens, just love them when they do •
Reposting for better luck this time. My visibility settings were somehow altered on here! grrr.
He was sweaty, hot and bothered a combination of things that Nagi usually disliked, but there was a way he found it tolerable — it was still a pain and what made it acceptable was you. Specifically your hands skimming under his hoodie to help him rid of it, his lips leaving yours for a mere moment as you pulled it over his head before meeting again with the perfect amount of messy, tongues meeting in a wet kiss that left spit covering your lips.
He had only just made it through the door, duffle bag lazily thrown by the entrance and kicking his shoes off. Walking through until he found you in the kitchen, shocked to see him a day earlier than he said he’d be back. His t-shirt looking huge on you, long, toned legs disappearing under it to the treasure he knew.
He did briefly think those fluffy bed socks stopping half way up your calves were cute though, little panda faces on your feet. They were soon wrapped around his waist as you ran at him, jumping into his arms.
That was all a few strides ago, by now you were back on your feet getting walked backwards, stripping the genius on your way to the bedroom.
“I -ah- I missed you pretty.”
You nodded as he tried to talk against your mouth, you failing to answer because you were desperate to get his jeans off, pulling at his belt and buttons.
Nagi let his trousers fall and he stepped out of them as he pushed you towards the bed. It was a blur how he ended up under you with his only his bloody socks left on, cock rock hard against his stomach, pre leaking from the slit and covering his thick head, drooling into the lines of his six pack.
He was so wet for you and his cock was flexing by its on against his abdomen just watching you pull his top over your head. Slatey, brown eyes watching your bare tits bounce, finally confirming you were just walking around without him here in nothing but pretty panties under his t-shirt.
“Ah - s’not fair, you walk around like this when m’not here?”
Seishiro had been away for three weeks, having nothing but your voice over the phone for calls, those steamy videos that made him switch off his games to put his headphones in and fuck his fists to you, yeah fists, his dick was plenty long enough to get both hands around.
He could easily get off to just the sounds you made, closing his eyes and letting that honey voice call and beg for him.
It was a bother how much he thought about you, but he couldn’t help it. You were so pretty, so sweet to him and so fucking insatiable. Nagi never thought about sex much until he met you —it sounded like hassle. Hot, sweaty and using energy he’d rather not use. Most the times he’d just ignore his hard ons because the sticky mess was bothersome.
Not now though, not when he knew how warm and wet your pussy was, swallowing his long dick and cock warming him, letting him cum in you to save him the hassle of cleaning it up.
Instead he got to watch it leak from that swollen pussy hole or dribble down your thighs in a hot breathy mess, or even cum down your throat and you’d open wide to let him see traces of it coating your tongue.
n’suddenly sex wasn’t such a bother to think about or do.
It’s all he thought about the last few days, when you’d sent him a video of just that, his cum leaving you. Sneakily you’d recorded it from one of your previous sessions with him. Your poor hole swollen from one of his feral moods, he’d cum twice in you and it was drooling out, pussy clenching around nothing after his dick had been bullying into it. Then your finger came down, collecting it to roll over your clit coaxing yourself to cum again and push the rest out.
He remembered that morning well enough, because he left a nasty bite on your inner thigh that he could see in the video, but you’d recorded that special treat whilst he’d gone to shower alone.
Because he was late for practice… again.
Such a sly, pretty thing and you were all his.
He’d spent so long in the bathroom whilst away fucking into his fist to that video, so long that Reo ended up knocking to see if he was ok.
He’d to see cum multiple times over it, his cock almost sore, fingers sticky with thick cum and using it to cum again and again. His heart racing, breathing laboured because he was putting himself through hell because he couldn’t stop fisting his cock over it.
His little dazed state was shook from him as your hand wrapped around his dick just under the head to align it with your hole, Nagi could feel you drooling slick down it already and he moaned when you rotated your hips around him. He was so sensitive already, cock flexing in your hand and against your cunt. His hands flew to your thighs and gripped, eyes widening because he felt like he was about to bust.
“W-Wait pretty hang on, I-“
Too late.
The moment you sank down onto his cock, burying it to the hilt, taking him too well without prep because you were so far gone and oh god how he heard you moan was enough…
Nagi’s head rolled back his eyes following into his sockets as they closed, his mouth hanging ajar as drool left the corner of his lips, his toes curling against the mattress as he bent his legs up, hips lifting off the bed causing you to fall forward onto him.
“Ngh- shit! M’cu-hah.”
You dunno what the hell he just tried saying but your jaw fell slack watching Nagi’s cum face that you knew too well. Pink dusting over his cheeks, his cock flexing in you as he came hard, his body stuttered under you, little convulses through his stomach and you tightened around him, warm walls hugging and swallowing his dick, cum filling you as he unloaded his balls.
“S-Sei? Did you just…”
“Ah-“ the heavy exhale left him, little pants in his breathing pattern as his hips fell back to the bed. Heat crawled up his neck and settled on his cheeks as you watched them burning.
Never in your life did you think you’d see the day Nagi Seishiro blush like that.
“-I came,”
He pouted, eyes looking down to where you were joined and he could see his cum already leaking past his dick buried in you as a plug.
“What a hassle. S’no fair, pretty, that video I-“
“Holy shit, Sei -fuck that was so hot.”
“You- huh?”
You leaned forward, body pressing flush against his, arms cradling his head and burying fingers into his white hair that was always so ridiculously soft, all whilst cock warming him. Your lips grazed his before pressing loving kisses on his face, settling on an Eskimo kiss as he looked up at you with one eye squinting closed, the other half open from your kiss assault.
God he was adorable.
“I missed you too, Sei~”
© pharix 2023 permission is not given to repost, translate or post anywhere else.
#nagi seishiro x reader#nagi x you#nagi seishiro x you#nagi blue lock#nagi seishiro smut#bllk nagi#bllk x you#bllk x reader#bllk smut#blue lock nagi#blue lock fanfiction#blue lock smut#blue lock thirst#blue lock x reader#bllk fic
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those words you spoke to me — i. sae
"i'm done waiting" + "i think i'm in love with you" + "don't look at me that way" + unrequited love
synopsis. you were always staring at itoshi sae's back. he was forever chasing something greater, not once turning around to see that look in your eyes.
wc. ~1.2k
— for @verysium i hope this is enough angst for you... | event masterlist ✉️
Hell comes in the form of Itoshi Sae.
He's too pretty for his own good, handsome and impossibly solid. He has this expression, too—cold and calculating, easy to admire so long as you aren't on the receiving end of his scrutinizing eyes.
Sae is a wonder of the world, a whirlwind of talent and fame and witty remarks and everything in between. He's the entirety of the word football, syllable to syllable, playing as if he were damned to do so. As if he were only ever born to decimate a soccer field. As if the universe had swallowed up the meaning of anything else in his heart long before he was even born.
Hell comes in the form of Itoshi Sae.
Your next door neighbour. The one who smacks you behind the head when you're being impolite to your elders. The one who makes sure your legs are properly tucked under the kotatsu so nonchalantly, as if he's incapable of telling you he cares any other way.
You're confident that he's this beautiful in every other life, in every reincarnation, in every world. That perfection could only possibly exist simmering in his soul.
Teal eyes that blink at you in confusion and annoyance, yet have an unmistakable fondness hidden beneath the stormy waters of his irises; soft hair slicked back because he couldn't be bothered to deal with his bed head; lashes that hug his waterline—you're not sure you'll witness raw beauty like this again in your lifetime.
Hell comes in the form of Itoshi Sae. You know that much for sure.
If you ever lost your memory you're certain you would know him still: the feeling of his back against you as he shields you from his screaming brother, the smell of his cologne permanently dancing under your nose. You would know the expanse of his skin, every light freckle on his nose, the firmness of his chest beneath your palms.
Hell comes in the form of Itoshi Sae. You could crumble to your knees and tell him everything—the love you harbour for him, the way he has devoured your heart. But truth be told, he's the devil. He could never love you back—not in this life. Not in any other.
You knew that. So why are you still standing on his front porch in the middle of the night?
"I'm in love with you."
He stares at you absently from his door, hand gripping the handle so tight that his knuckles are turning white.
"That's not funny," he scoffs.
"It's not a joke."
His gaze sharpens into a glare, head tilting back almost as if he's looking down on you. It's a foreign feeling, one that you'd witnessed a million and one times before but never felt for yourself—to be unwanted by Sae. To be without meaning.
"The fuck is wrong with you?" He hisses. It appears that he's bubbling with emotion, but you can't figure out which ones. "I'm supposed to get on this plane in eight hours."
Ah, Spain. He was leaving and you'd never be able to stop him if you tried. If you did, you're positive that he would rip through you like a bullet with no remorse.
"I love you," you repeat. He falters, eyes roaming your expression to try and understand what the hell you're doing.
What are you doing? You have to wonder that for yourself.
You were always staring at Sae's back. He was the one who stood between you and Rin when you fought, protecting you from his temperamental little brother despite thinking you were both being idiots. He was the one who sat in front of you in class, passing his eraser whenever you kicked the back of his chair. He was the one on the other end of the field, attacking enemy territories while you were left behind in the bleachers.
He was forever chasing something greater, not once turning around to see that look in your eyes. He was born to be more than a lover, a friend, a companion. Itoshi Sae was destined for perfection, to be out of reach despite being so close.
But you'd mistaken his rotten kindness for love too many years ago to take it back, never able to undo the knots he had tied in your stomach.
You wanted to be selfish, just this once. You wanted to be seen, to know that he knows. You've waited long enough.
If Sae was born to play football, you're sure you were only ever born into this world to chase after him. To love him so much that it ate your flesh.
"I just had to tell you. At least once in my life, I had to."
"Stop looking at me like that—"
"I've always loved you."
"—it's pathetic."
Silence fills the air and you suddenly become hyper aware of how many tears have gathered in the corners of your eyes; the heat of your sorrow streaming down your face.
For a moment, he hesitates. There's that familiar fondness glimmering in his gaze, soft and reserved for you. His childhood friend—the one who kept losing all his erasers and the one whose voice he could hear cheering for him from all the way down the field.
Then it melts away, and he looks at you with utter indifference. You think that he's unfairly good at hiding his thoughts behind a mask of apathy.
"I don't know what you want me to say," he whispers.
I want you to love me back. "You don't have to say anything."
He looks at you for a long time, just staring. There's conflict swimming in every part of his expression, lips parting then shutting again as if he can't decide how to respond.
"I think you should leave."
You blink at him, at the bluntness of his words. You've witnessed this before; the way he so easily pushes others away when he feels too vulnerable. To be loved is to be seen, to be known, and Sae wants none of that.
"If that's what you want."
Some part of you deep down knows that it's not what he wants. That there are words unspoken tangled up in his throat. But his apprehension is enough, telling you that his heart is devoid of space for another human even if he wished for it to be different.
"It is," he strains out, lying through his teeth. "I don't love you that way. You're like a sibling—"
"Don't do that," you interrupt, drawing away from him. "Just break my heart, please."
"I don't love you." And he leaves it at that.
Hell comes in the form of Itoshi Sae. It's a notion that follows you as you walk down the driveway toward your stalled car, left running because deep down you already knew his answer.
The beauty of his forbidden paradise drives you to turn around, too, and just like every other time his back is turned to you. His hand rests on the handle of his door, yet his body is frozen in place. You wait for a moment, eyes cast over your shoulder to see if he'll turn around and finally look your way.
He doesn't.
(You've driven off by the time he comes back outside, watching the back of your car pull away into the fog.
He's done the right thing, he thinks. He could never stand watching you cry.)
© ALABOADOA 2023 — please do not translate or post my works to other platforms.
#— whispers in the wind: 1k event ✉️#blue lock#blue lock angst#bllk#bllk angst#bllk x reader#blue lock x reader#bllk fic#blue lock fic#itoshi sae x reader#itoshi sae x you#itoshi sae x y/n#itoshi sae#sae itoshi x reader#sae itoshi x y/n#sae itoshi x you#sae itoshi#sae x reader#bllk x you#bllk x y/n#bluelock
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𝐀𝐋𝐄𝐗𝐈𝐒 𝐍𝐄𝐒𝐒 𝐗 𝐆𝐍 𝐑𝐄𝐀𝐃𝐄𝐑
word count: 895
summary: alexis ness gets injured from soccer. kaiser taking him home, he spends the day under your care
gender neutral reader [feminine nicknames]
𝐆𝐑𝐔𝐍𝐓𝐒 𝐎𝐅 𝐏𝐀𝐈𝐍 fill the room, the soccer player has yet to get comfortable on his couch. His right leg propped up after suffering a terrible injury. Kaiser just stands there, staring at his misery, bouncing his leg up and down impatiently.
“When are they gonna come?” The blue haired man asked, “Waiting all day isn’t exactly my specialty, Ness.”
The shorter man quickly comes to your defense. Forgetting his injury, he abruptly gets up, but he then almost screams in pain with the stress on his knee. Keys then fiddle with the door outside, prompting Kaiser to dash to the location. You sprint pass the tall man to get to (you’re favorite) German. Kneeling in front of the couch you examine his knee with concern.
“Are you okay? I heard a noise from outside.” You question your lover.
He grunts for a moment but responds with that sweet voice of his, “Of course, meine hübsche.” (my pretty)
You give a small chuckle as you stare at his leg more intently, using your experience as a nurse to tend to your boyfriend. You ask the normal questions; did you take your medicine, how’s the pain 1-10, etc. After caring for your partner, you notice a tall figure still standing in front of the door.
“This is disgusting, I’m leaving.” Is all Kaiser said before he makes his departure. You have no idea how your angel of a boyfriend ever even liked that demon. Not trying to toot your own horn here but… you like to say you take much better care of him than Kaiser ever will.
“You okay, beautiful?” Ness asked, it only melts your heart more. This guy could literally beat up a person and you would just stare with big red hearts as eyes, it was so cartoonish your love for him. What was even more silly was his love for you. He would turn the world upside down, left and right, and end it if you gave him the word. It truly came out of a fairytale – his everlasting love for you. Some called it like a dog and master, but it was much more. If it truly was dog and master, you would be the unconditional loving dog who worshiped Ness, you would do just as crazy a thing for him just as he would for you. It was a mutual insane obsession, some might call it unhealthy, you guys called it love.
You only smile at him and give a chaste kiss to his cute forehead, making sure to get straight in the middle. You travel over to your kitchen – one that you rarely used when Ness is over as he always suggested going on a date to a fancy restaurant, but now here you are making your best to imitate the cuisine from his favorite German restaurant. If Ness was gonna spend the next couple weeks on your couch, isolated from the world, he was gonna get the best food he got since his birth.
You sang delightfully in tune with the song, Chemtrails Over the Country Club by Lana del Rey played on the speaker. Cooking some meat, Ness layed there, staring at the most ethereal person attempt to cook him a five star meal (you would fail but he wouldn’t tell you). God he wish he could capture this moment on his camera so he could keep a physical copy, but he supposes a phone will do.
After eating a sweet treat for dessert (which ended up being ice cream because somehow you fucked up the original dessert). You hold Ness on your shoulder, traveling to your room so you have easier access to him in the middle of the night. Unsurprisingly being extremely heavy, it takes a while before you settle your boyfriend on the bed.
“Wait here, I have to get the kit.” You state before heading to the restroom. It only takes a few seconds but you come back with gauze and other materials to rebandage the injury. No words are said as you focus on his knee, with the silence saying everything that's needed. Ness once again oogles at your focused state, making him question if he should visit you at work more often. Phantom hearts fill his eyes, thoughts of you caring for him, this time with a ring on your finger flood his mind. He wonders if he should start getting injured more – but then you would have to worry more and he doesn’t want that. However, seeing you here, with the soft orange light from the lamp capturing your features beautifully. He feels like home here, maybe he will move in with you next month. After all, no house is a home without your presence to warm it.
Putting the kit back, you come back to bed with pajamas. You guys set your TV on a show, and although you don’t particularly find it entertaining, hearing Ness laugh next to you is a more than good enough reason to keep it running.
And when the lights go off, when it’s just you two in the dark in your bed – that's when most of the memories happen, the talks, the jokes, the moments of adoration of the other, where one could stare at the other’s resting figure and recollect the day. Where you two laugh at Ness’s new lockscreen of you cooking peacefully in the kitchen.
@lakeside-paradise @tofumiarchives @rini-rushed @shrii-kk
#✮ mia’s writing#alexis ness#alexis ness x reader#alexis ness x gn reader#bllk#blue lock#blue lock fanfiction#bllk fic#bllk x reader#drabble
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ᡕᠵ᠊ᡃ່࡚ࠢ࠘⸝່ࠡࠣ᠊߯᠆ࠣ࠘ᡁࠣ࠘᠊᠊ࠢ࠘𐡏 * .♡ *:・゚
Seishiro Nagi x Reader
Watching your boyfriend shoot bodies on Call of Duty as he shoots fat loads inside you.
(The grind never stops ig)
————————————————————————
"Sorry.. hah.. gotta go, duty calls."
.ᐟ⭒๋࣭☆⋆。𖦹˚ ༘✶ ⋆。˚
It was just a normal night: you were reading manga on the bed while your boyfriend, Nagi, played on his PC. Until you got bored, so to cure that boredom, you decided to watch your boyfriend play.
When you approached, he called out, "Hey." "Hi, what are you playing?" you asked, and immediately he replied, "Call of Duty." To which you hummed, "Cool, can I sit?" You asked, pointing to his lap, and he nodded. You leaned back against his chest as you watched the brightly lit screen, showing your boyfriend obliterating players. Amazed, you kept praising his efforts, and as the matches progressed you became more and more excited as you watch the sceen but due to the excitement you felt as he killed each and every one you were subconsciously rubbing the lower regions of your boyfriend's sniper rifle as well.
As you sat back down, he began twitching, leaving you worried. "Baby, are you okay?" you asked. After releasing a few grunts, he answered, "Yeah, baby, I'm fine. Just sit back down, stay put, okay?". For a few seconds you let that sink in and as you sat you could feel his hard length faintly brushing against your thin pajama shorts. "Ah" you said, snickering.
You had a lightbulb moment and you decided to tease him, you intentionally rubbed on it more, earning low grunts and pants from him, and it went on like that. Frustrated from all the edging, he commands, "Mnh.. that's no good, sit on it harder baby" he whispered in your ear, all breathy. Being the good girlfriend you are, you sat. Earning a whimper and a shudder from the snow haired soldier.
— Time skip
Nagi's twitching on his keyboard, seemingly missing his shots and aims. The reason? You bouncing up and down his fat dick of course! How could he not miss? When you're all sprawled out, back arching and both arms quaking, holding on for dear life on his desk taking in massive shots of his thick load. When the two of you were busy on riding the fuck out of him, his teammates were busy shit talking him on the mic as well. Frustrated and distracted, Nagi opened up his mic, "Dude, shut the fuck up. My girlfriend's riding my dick. You're ruining the mood." As he dropped that fucking bomb the room fell silent, but, fortunately you weren't, because you backed him up by moaning like a whore directly to the mic with your pleas and cries as he got down to business and fucked your cunt dry.
"Sorry.. hah.. gotta go, duty calls." the last words Nagi said before leaving the game, as he focused on dominating your wet and stuffed cunt. Bending you over his desk and mercilessly railing in his fat, long and heavy sniper rifle into your walls as if it wasn't already enough.
.ᐟ⭒๋࣭☆⋆。𖦹˚ ༘✶ ⋆。˚
Needless to say your pussy got dominated that night. :3
#seishiro nagi x reader#bllk x reader#bllk fic#bllk smut#nagi seishiro#nagi x reader#nagi x you#nagi x y/n
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