#that isn't lost on me
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#personal#people that go out of their way to be mean can eat shit#and I mean literal shit#may chris gardocki and tommy force upon you the solid white shit that you must lick#if you know that reference leave a comment lol#I tried to put myself out there and was not just let down but was told that I was a 4 at best...out of 10...#a simple no would have been sufficient#but then I also recognize that most people DO NOT STOP#so meanness sometimes becomes just an automatic response because it yields results#that isn't lost on me#but also body shamed yesterday after complimenting a persons jacket??#maybe everyone's just sad and salty#there is a lot of shit going on in the world#I am just of the mindset that we should put the energy out into the world that we want to get back#which is why I try to live the this number one rule#DONT BE A DICK#In other news I had a dream that I was trying to recite Shakespeare during the civil war but I was growling each stanza while trying#to reload my musket and then screaming like a toddler#someone tell me what my dream means#I'm a mental health specialist so maybe I should figure it out on my own#PS I don't think I'm a 4 or a 10#not that it really matters#the principle here is what matters
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#the Nowhere Man who waits and the God of Stories who watches
#mobius#loki#lokius#mcuedit#lokiedit#marveledit#loki spoilers#owen wilson#tom hiddleston#owenwilsonedit#marvel#dianagifs#😩😭#what... in the most tragic of romances did i just witness#gotta rewatch tomorrow but cannot BELIEVE how okay i am with everything atm???#their story clearly isn't done their burden is obviously going on without each other and they exist fundamentally connected#they've lost everything but being able to see mobius every step of the way is enough for loki to make the sacrifice#and mobius left for his timeline with no other purpose than to make sure loki could do just that#now they're lost without each other?? the only thing mobius can do is exist for a moment in loki's creation i'm UNWELL#god this is the star crossed angst that's gonna keep me going for the rest of my LIFE they're my everything#loki s2 spoilers
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Drew this real quick because I fucking love these two so much ???? Especially Bee. I wish they interacted more so badly. PLEASE.
Also learning how to draw these guys.. slowly.
#IT WILL NEVER NOT BE FUNNY TO ME HOW DELIGHTED B GOT ??? FOR VIOLENCE?#the brainrotsreal's art tag ✧˖°:*♡#like okay you have d17/megatron okay#d17 got consumed by vengeance. iconic of him. you SEE him grow more ruthless/ violent........AND THEN YOU HAVE B 127#he got knife hands for 0.00937 seconds and immediately KILLED PEOPLE SO EASILY IM SCREAMING SDJKJSDS#did by accident and then did it gleefully. AND SO WELL TOO LIKE ???? bro got that hunger for violence ig. got that delight.#i wish we got to see d17 and b127 interact more cause imagine b got his knife hands early and d17 was like.... alright start stabbing#and b127 is LONELY. mf is deprived of interaction and CLEARLY clingy. i see him telling d17 to stand down so he isn't hurt.#not necessarily because he has the SAME morals as orion/optimus#like look me in my eye. tell me if d17 didn't say something like “needing an ally not a leader” (friendship bait)#AND UR TELLING ME BEE WOULDN'T FOLD AND HELP HIM? HM? HMMMMMMMM?#like i feel like b's morals are mostly match whoever he's around. if he was around d-17 more? WELP? let's assassinate together bestie!#anyways optimus and elita gotta watch b fr cause mf is already an incredible ally on the battle field SDKJKDSS#like just tell him where to go and that place would DESTROYED. NO WITNESSEES LEFT. LIKE HELLO#transformers one my beloved#d 16#megatron#tf one#tf one megatron#tf one b 127#b 127#transformers one fanart#never know how many actual tags to use istg.#imagine being isolated for years and all that shit went down like what is going on in b's brain rn. mf got 3 friends and then lost one#SO QUICKLY
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i feel like it'll help non brits to know that davina mccall irl presents a show where she connects adopted people with their bio families btw
#doctor who spoilers#doctor who#lmao#it's called long lost family and it's made me sob every time i've seen it#making a psa since my non brit friends weren't aware and were like why the hell is she there#also it isn't just adopted ppl it's families who got seperated in some way
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Put that thing back or so help me.
[First] Prev <–-> Next
#poorly drawn mdzs#mdzs#wei wuxian#jiang cheng#wen qing#a-yuan#I had a few different ideas for what do for 'JC visits WWX in the burial mounds' but I must say...#JC's genuine baffled outburst at why the hell WWX has a child running around really took me out.#WWX for his credit isn't much of a fatherly figure. More of a 'cool uncle that occasionally plays but has work to do.'#I know it is a common fan headcanon to put WWX as a surrogate parent to A-yuan. It's cute though I don't really see it!#All the Wen remnants and WWX have something a lot more complex than a straightforward found family thing going on.#It certainly isn't a little western nuclear family unit. They are bound by trauma and guilt and they will *not* talk about it.#A-Yuan is the representation of all the children lost to the war. He is also a little seedling that there is hope for the future.#And he is an opportunity for WWX to reconnect with his own displaced childhood.#Right now his rather dismissive of him but we'll get there. Wei Wuxian will have his unhealthy coping mechanism moment with this child.#I sure hope nothing bad happens to them! I hope Jiang Cheng just comes by for a nice visit!
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so i wrote a book that comes out soon and having that be real feels like falling down stairs because i wanted this since i was 7 years old so now what do i want after it.
so tell me why today all i care about is the word trundle, that the word trundle exists. of course i have things to do and emails to send and a world of suffering to protect but today my brain won't let me look away from the sheer linguistic improbability of trundle.
i saw a truck doing it. i imagine animals did it first. or people maybe. to trundle comes direct from old english. cows do it on occasion, but more often sheep (in my experience). someone had to name lope and someone had to name slog. the verbs to run and to leap make sense; they are singular and important distinguishers.
but we can bask rather than relax. we can scuttle rather than crawl. sometimes when i move in dance class it is to undulate rather than roll. someone had to name things like sonder and whimsy. of course we had words for tangible things like tree and grass and root. i love those words, i'm eating them.
i don't know the word for this thing. where it's real-now. sometimes i feel it when i am dating someone i actually like-and-love and i realize that is real, i am dating them and it's real that i like-and-love them. sometimes i have this feeling when i have been planning a vacation or an event for weeks-and-months and it finally happens - the feeling this is happening, it's happening right now.
it happens randomly sometimes too. i will be at the carnival or at an ice cream stand or with the last light of summer in my hair and i will feel it again, that sense - i have waited my whole life for this, and im finally experiencing it, and i need to pay attention to it.
but it's real! how amazing! how horribly tragic! it's real. it exists. the moment is here.
i have no idea what to do with it.
#link to book is first line#writeblr#i lost my car my phone my job my laptop#all in the span of 9 months#so no otherwise stuff isn't going well lol#luck seems to work like that for me#.... i have BIG luck.#i don't get to decide which side of luck i fall on#i am either STUPIDLY lucky. i mean should-have-died#or i am STUPIDLY unlucky. i mean. my phone saw the ocean jumped out of girlpockets . and took a dive#PS updated the link idk why it didn't work sorry!!
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hopeless time loop. the way out isn’t to save everyone. the way out isn’t to save even one person. the way out isn’t to change anything. the way out is accepting how it happened the first time is how it always will be. that’s how you acted, that’s how they acted, that’s how you would have acted every time if you weren’t given the curse of hindsight. the way out is accepting you can’t fix the past; you can only forgive yourself for it.
#there's this game i love called little hope that plays with these ideas (though not with a time loop)#i do love time loops narratives that explore how a person is confronted with their life and their choices#when forced to live the same day over and over again#and i LOVE time loops that try to reverse mistakes made and lives lost#but to see a character put themselves through loops upon loops upon loops#trying to rectify past mistakes (especially in the case where people died) only to be confronted with the reality it isn't working#and even in a loop where they save everyone the loop just resets#because the universe is essentially saying 'no that isn't how it happened and you know that's not how it happened'#it compels me!#i feel similarly about time travel where time 'fights back'#like this idea that there is a central timeline that time does not like being diverted from#so it will try to course correct itself#you save lincoln from an assassination only for him to die in a train crash#it's a cool way to confront the idea of fate#anyway all tragedies are hopeless time loops thank you for coming to my ted talk#a shout into the void#1k#5k#10k
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This line is just so silly
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Silly Gale doodle to make me feel better about my art :")
#gale dekarios#gale of waterdeep#bg3 gale#baldur's gate 3#bg3#bg3 fanart#baldur's gate fanart#tee ramble in the tags ->#i spent so much time on that one art piece I've been working on#and i feel like it isn't good#and wasn't worth all the pain and time i spent on it#:(#and i also have been struggling to draw gale lately i feel like i lost my ability to draw again#so in a bit of an art slump#i want to draw but i can't draw how they look in my mind#but!!#i know i probably just need to step away and calm down#let it come back to me#<- ramble over#galemancer#galemance
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hey, remember being 18 years old and playing mass effect for the first time and it's got this like intense aura of being very small and very insignificant in a very big, very empty galaxy? remember playing mass effect for the first time and everything all of this is so new and mysterious, and it's 2am and you're sitting in a dark room in the light from your tv and you're playing through feros for the first time and you feel that this is someting very old and very ancient and you are somewhere you shouldn't be and you don't know what's going to happen or where you're going but you keep on. there's a tingling in your stomach and you're playing mass effect for the first time. the thorian is a milennia old sentient plant being. the rachni queen is old and telepathic and a hive mind and in pain. sovereign is an ancient machine that has not been built but is, and has always been, and this is something so alien and so unlike and beyond anything your human mind can comprehend, and this is something unexplainable and huge and as uncaring and indifferent as the empty galaxy around you. you're playing mass effect for the first time and you're walking on the surface of an almost completely empty planet with nothing but your two companions silently walking beside you and everything is so huge and empty and silent and you're so small and insignificant and it's so beautiful and so scary and you feel like you are on a rollercoaster about to drop down. you are playing mass effect for the first time and you're playing the mission on the moon and you stop and just look up at earth visible in the sky. you know this. this is home. you are playing mass effect for the first time, and the galaxy is so big, and you are so tiny, and everything is about to change for you.
#mass effect#wild rambles#i miss the feeling of playing that game for the first time#now i know everything and it isn't as mysterious and alluring anymore#getting lost in the tunnels on feros is one of my memories of all time. it just felt like... i was meant to get lost. there's Something her#i love the whole trilogy but man me1 really did have that sci-fi interstellar type of feeling the other two don't#also later they retconned the reapers as having actually been built by someone as opposed to ''this is so alien you can't understand it.#this is a machine without a creator. it has always existed. you are not meant to understand. this is so much bigger than you.''#which i really liked a lot more but like. whatever. im not in charge. they wanted to make things more palatable to the human mind when i#think the cosmic horror aspect of the reapers in me1 was one of the things that affected me the most#and made me stay with the series for as long as i did
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I'm feeling bitchily critical today so. Let's get critical.
Reasons why Season 8 of 911 (so far) sucks:
Bobby and Athena are aimless
They have no house. The logical development is for them to look for one, one for their future. That is theirs. Where are the house hunting woes? The disageeements and compromises? Are they ever going to have a chance to find a place they both love? Or build one, even?
Athena's job description is all over the place
She's giving school talks. She's conducting traffic stops. She's escorting a prisoner across state lines. She is mentoring new officers. She's a goddamn Sergeant but what is her job scope? Every single thing requiring the presence of police, apparently!
Hen and Karen have little direction for growth
The Mara adoption issue could have brought out more of their relationship, developed them in terms of relying on each other through a difficult time. The storyline with Ortiz could have really delved into the struggles of the foster care system, and how Hen and Karen broke rules designed to protect the kids. (Seriously, if a child is removed from a foster family, it's logical not allowing the foster parents to meet the child that was removed for the safety of the child). Where was the appeal to Ortiz as a mother? Where was the struggle? Where is the tension between the Wilsons and the Hans? Instead there was a Deux Ex Gerrard. And I am not even gonna start on the whole "why didn't you take leave for Halloween" shit, that stuff should have been settled when Denny was a baby. What are their next steps? Same old same old?
Gerrard is a joke
An established bigot and racist returns. He could have been a great way to show how the 118 has grown beyond him and his bullying. Instead they're cowed by him, and lets him yell at Buck? Whatever happened to the "who cares" courage in Season 7? And he gets the reward of his dream job?
Eddie is still not healed
He emotionally cheated on his girlfriend with his dead wife's doppelganger. Has he even processed what that actually means? No! His son moved to Texas. Has he coped with the loneliness in his house? Who knows? Certainly not the audience, since we don't see him go to therapy or, hell, have a full breakdown! He confides in people who aren't his friends, let alone his so-called best friend! Bobby gave him a prayer book but we don't even hear Eddie rage at a God who keeps putting devastation and challenges in his way. What wa the point of the prayer book then? He just danced in his underwear and somehow that made him smile and now he's moving across the country and, what, giving up on his home and his job? Is that really healing, Edmundo Díaz? Or are you just running from the problem again?
Chimney has no internal or external motivation
He was providing for Mara for a few months. Was he stressed about it? Did he think about seeking a promotion for a higher salary? Also, he is an immigrant. Does that influence how he teaches Jee? Has he and Maddie, white suburban raised Maddie, ever discussed the potential problems Jee might face? Or whether they wanna include some Korean culture in Jee's education, since they gave her a Korean name? Does he ever think about any of these issues? Is he at all conflicted? What does Chimney want?
Maddie
She was the one who wanted to meet Tommy. Has she done so outside of the wedding? What was her opinion of him? Is Maddie content to stay in Dispatch in the exact same position? Has she any career ambition? And about Jee: does she never think about the Korean part of Jee? Connecting to her own culture? Learning Korean, maybe? That would have been interesting because perhaps she wants her daughter to connect to that part of her roots but Chimney doesn't, for his own reasons. Also, if she wants to have a second kid, why didn't she discuss it with Chimney outright before the pregnancy? Was she not taking the pill? Were they careless again? What would she do if Chimney didn't want a second child? Abort? Given how the first pregnancy was traumatic for the whole family, including her brother, this development is showing her to be pretty self-centered, frankly. I don't know this Maddie. She's not the same one that gave Buck her Jeep to escape, knowing that she'll be hurt by an abusive husband.
Brad
Why is airtime devoted to a character that is barely connected to the 118? What is the reason behind giving him so much focus? Is he supposed to quit acting and become a firefighter or something? What is the rationale for his existence?
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And I haven't even touched on Buck or Tommy.
#911 critical#feeling bitchy#anyway.#it irks me when a story's potential isn't met#and there is so much potential lost
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i just think spock has great mom friend potential tbh. strong contender for the cutest thing i've ever drawn
#(the irony of drawing this post on 3 hours of sleep is not lost to me)#star trek#star trek fanart#star trek tos#star trek the original series#spones#spones fanart#spock#leonard mccoy#bones mccoy#i fully intended to just draw a funny thijg of bones going WOAUGH shit bc im sleep deprived and i get the wobbles but it ran away from me#bones x spock#im sleep deprived because i lost my 11pm coffee roulette yesterday... i suspect that my meds stack w caffeine#spock fanart#dust trek hcs#i like to think that spock needs less sleep bc vulcan but if he DOESN'T get that sleep hes absolutely zonked... let that guy catnap#bones on the other hand no matter how much sleep he gets if hes up hes up and naps do not agree w him at all#he'll get up feeling worse somehow (spock is SO good at napping tho it drives him insane)#jim naps like a dad at a school recital (any chair that isn't the captains chair is fair game)#this is mcspirk in spirit as always
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woag .. otp
#fma#royai#riza hawkeye#roy mustang#talking to user chrysopoeias reminded me of this doodle i posted on twitter ages ago#im too dumb to make analysis textposts with my opinions so you get (checks notes) royai experiencing post nut clarity#about how funny i think it is that riza bases all her self value into how useful she is or isn't being#while roy is like wow.. i love riza can't believe she still by my side after all i've done ..#in the hospital scene after the lust fight where roy is scolding her there's a part he says he's going to keep trusting her with his back#and she looks genuinely surprised as if she really expected him to just throw her out because she failed and lost her utility#when he's mostly angry because riza gave up on life so easily and he doesn't want her to die. he can't live in a world without her#riza babe ur so mentally ill <3
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NO ONE'S EVER REALLY GONE (a collection about endings)
Amy Hempel / @itspileofgoodthings / Richard Jackson / Niall Williams / Ed Sheeran / John Berger / Lemony Snicket / Theodore Roethke / Mikko Harvey / Holly Warburton / Ingeborg Bachmann / Jeanette Winterson / Leila Chatti / George Sand / Miriam Adeney / Rainer Maria Rilke / Unknown / Mural in Hamilton, NZ / Rosamunde Pilcher / Nikki Giovanni
#web weaving#hiiii maria i have been thinking about this post since forever so here tis.#i think about endings a lot a lot!! but also how things that are true stay with you and gleam within the core of you forever#and also the no one's ever really gone has stayed with me for all my life and still shakes me to this day!#the love isn't wasted! it's not lost! it's all going to be alright in the end.
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Was going to write a little ficlet to go with this, but. Vaccine tiredness is killer.
A little bit of art for the FOP Nature au by @bunnieswithknives. I cannot recommend checking it out enough.
#art#my art#fop nature au#fop#fairly oddparents#fairly oddparents a new wish#fop a new wish#fopanw#fop dale#dale dimmadome#he deserves to die in a dimmaditch#body horror#blood#candy gore#Anyway the concept behind the ficlet was going to be basically about Bramble#(because im a dirty little bitch who shoves their oc where they don't belong)#setting up traps in the forest with the intention of not catching actual deer#but rather the rogue fairy disguised as a deer that the fairy council had warned her to be on the lookout for (aka Flowers)#The Council doesnt really give a shit about Bramble or her forest#they just want to make sure Flowers isn't COMPLETELY unsupervised after the Dale Incident#So anyway Bramble does catch something#and its certainly not a real deer#but he's pretty damn sure it isn't another fairy either#(idk why Dale would be in the forest I guess maybe he just went looking for Flowers to fix this and freaked out and got lost? idk)#Anyway none of that is actually canon to the au ofc it was just in my head#and it gave me an excuse to draw a fucked up deer man so like what else could I ask for
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[Medicine]
"The Caduceus. Commonly mixed up with the Rod of Asclepius."
Guys I think it'd be really funny if Pharma and Ratchet had the same voice
#he's got great shapes but I hate drawing his legs with a passion#Also the more I read into the cadueceus and rod of Asclepius#the more I go#“wait isn't that literally Ratchet and Pharma”#lost light spoilers in tags#I mean the Cadueceus being the wand of Hermes/ messengers of the gods *cough* and in some accounts having the ability to take and give life#While the Rod of Asclepius is held by the god Asclepius/god of healing and more accepted as the correct symbol for medicine/healing?#Also Asclepius being the son of Apollo -> the Temple of Apollo being located in Delphi Greece#The Cadueceus having wings -> Pharma has wings#Rod of Asclepius doesn't have wings -> Ratchet not having wings#The two symbols getting mixed up frequently -> Ratchet and Pharma looking pretty similar face/head-wise#Edit: another thing I just noticed: Two snakes on the Cadueceus -> Pharma and Adaptus fighting for control#someone must have made the connection before me right#James Roberts istg if this is intentional#I literally made the connection on accident after going “hey what if I added the snakes to this”#ok sorry for really long tags#mtmte spoilers#transformers#mtmte#maccadam#maccadams#tf idw#transformers fanart#frootertooter archive#more than meets the eye#pharma#pharma idw#lost light#LL
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January 22 2024
Ever since that person asked me how I'd rewrite Lost World into my canon adjacent au my mind has been spiraling about these idiots.
I got a lot of changes planned for these guys, and a lot of redesigning to do in the future (halp me)
bonus doodle
#sonic lost world#zavok the zeti#deadly six#sonic fanart#sonic redesign#roadtrip!sonic au#I'm sorry this isn't a doodle request-#Something happened and now I've seriously lost all my motivation to draw Sonic characters.#But don't worry- I'm getting better. I'll be back on my feet in a few days.#My friends are helping me a lot rn- even if they might not realize it.
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