#that implication gives me rabies

[xhatake]

( i said i was going to hit with the my muse is dead meme )

Dark hues land on the unmoving form of his twin and everything suddenly feels wrong in the world. Why isn't he breathing? why is there so much blood? why is it his twin and not someone else as mean as that sounds? Why Masaki?

He and Masaki had their ups and downs as siblings, they squabbled, they ignored one another, they said stuff they didn't mean but at the end of the day they were twins and would always be there for one another but ... that was not going to happen anymore, was it? He can't make sense of the noise that escapes him, it sounded like something of a wounded dog and a choked sob all mixed into one as he crouches down and pulls his brother to his chest. He tries to shock his heart into working again, something he's never actually tried but he'd try anything for his twin. His mind is fully of panic and his vision is blurry and he can't breathe.

Not Masaki .. please not my twin ... don't take my twin from me ... please ..

But his twin was already gone, someone had ended his life here on the battlefield and he felt ... he felt so alone .. he felt grief washing over him and most of all he felt angry, so angry. not at masaki, never at masaki but at the ones that dared to end his brothers life. Head snaps up and if looks could kill, every enemy would have fallen dead ( don't worry though he is getting to that part ). chakra becomes unstable, cloaking him, bijuu chakra covering him and his hands that hold masaki close are shaking as he gently sets him down for a moment, he would not leave him there, he just needs to take care of all this scum.

A roar is what comes from him next as he fully gives into the bijuu chakra, as he fully lets himself lose control and destroy everything in his path. the chakra does not stop cloaking him once he has destroyed everyone that dared to take his twin from him and he comes back into his own mind as best as he can given everything, instead it curls around him almost like the bijuu's chakra is comforting him.

He goes back to his twin, he will take him home, he deserves to be able to make it back home at least and he would make sure masaki would make it home again one more time.

and then he's alone, the last hatake. he'd never imagined a world where he would lose his twin brother. his own life was up in the air as a jinchuriki but not masaki, masaki was supposed to live on and have a long happy life. it wasn't supposed to be like this. He's alone in a place with too many memories of his twin brother holding that stupid ass cup that masaki had gotten him what feels like forever again, holding it like its a lifeline, tears flowing down his cheeks, broken sobs escaping him.

masaki ... i'm sorry i failed you too ..

My muse is dead. Tell me how yours is dealing with it.

[batfambrainrotbeloved]

Ok two things, because I’ve decided that since I’m starting to actually use tumblr and not just be lurking and that means that per the contract, I must address some things that I was really tempted to before. I apologize that it’s all gonna be on posts you made a While ago.

One, that post you made about the Batfam from the original timeline finding out Tim was dead. That killed me. Like I have been thinking about that for months. I still have a screenshot in my camera roll of the last line.

Two, the poll you made? of flipping heads or tales? Devastating. On one hand I live for the angst, but on the other I am so glad that we didn’t have Jason yelling at Tim for the pie. I would have simply been destroyed. I don’t know if I would have recovered. Ever since learning that was even an option I’ve been distraught.

Anyway just wanted to tell you how much I love the fic. It makes me what to bite them, but I’m scared I’ll give them rabies. I have fully reread it about 4 times now not including the passive reads. I feel like the words are ingrained into my soul. At some point I saw one of your post talking about how you have laid hints in the story I have been trying to actually absorb the words into my skin and blood stream. So who knows. Maybe at some point I’ll have a theory on what’s going on. But I am not very smart so i won’t hold my breath about it.

<3333333

Congratulations on using tumblr more!! Join the collective :D And no worries!! if anything I ADORE talking about older posts, the new takes, recontectualized shit etc.

The Jason with a shovel thing is actually something I nabbed from a friend @ihavenotsleptindays based on their fic i've been viciously obsessing over here because my god the implications were too fucking good and so so on brand I couldn't resist the brainrot.

I tend to do polls when im like "Yeah I think I know what I want but im not sure" because then watching the direction swing one way or another, I truly learn if I really WAS indecisive or if I was like "NO I WANT THIS ONE" and for heads and tails?? While Jason deserves a good yell- i'm happy how it turned out.

Again thank you so so much <33 And oh yeah, there are LOTS of things scattered throughout each of the chapters. One way ill contextualize it is theres an entire closet of Chekovs guns, some that have already been fired and just the powder and casing remain, others who i've yet to even load.

If you do have a theory id LOVE to hear it!! Feel free to ask/comment/dm but of course depending on the medium will vary how much I may or may not confirm/allude :)

[novafire-is-thinking]

#prowl suffers from many rabies conditions #not all of which might actually be rabies

Pretty much. lol

But let me expand. This isn’t the only thing that makes Prowl such a controversial character.

It’s also the fact that no one else seems to/very few know about the rabies, so he looks like a crazy control freak who hates everyone.

Everything is a life-or-death crisis to Prowl because he sees the most likely far-future implications of every. single. action. He’s not just able to track hundreds of physical objects at once and predict their individual trajectories. He does it in the abstract with “simulations” of where actions will most likely lead. It happens almost automatically for him.

So, back to the rabies vaccine metaphor: In Prowl’s mind, he’s administering the necessary rabies vaccine regardless of who’s allergic, and surprise, surprise: most are.

They have an allergic reaction (sometimes deadly). Then most people hate him for it and think he’s a monster for giving them something they’re allergic to when it’s literally the only thing that has a chance of saving them or the Cybertronian race as a whole.

Furthermore, Prowl himself isn’t as allergic to the vaccine, so those who are severely allergic look at the fact that he seems to have it better and think he’s out to hurt them when it just happens to be an unavoidable reality that many have a severe allergy while he got lucky.

He’s taking the same vaccine as everyone else, but everyone reacts differently.

there’s a thing I think about sometimes when I’m writing that I call ‘the rabies condition’

by which I mean: there are no contraindications to getting the rabies vaccine for post-exposure prophylaxis.

every other vaccine usually has a few contraindications like ‘don’t take this if you’re allergic to it’ or ‘if you’re pregnant discuss the risks and benefits with your doctor’ or ‘don’t give to children below age 6′ or something, but not the rabies vaccine. if you’ve been exposed to rabies, there is literally no medical reason that can justify not getting the rabies vaccine–you can be deadly allergic to literally every single ingredient and the correct decision is still to administer the vaccine, because if you don’t, you’re 100% guaranteed to die of rabies. even the life-threatening allergies are a step up in survival rate (especially since anaphylaxis is something that can be managed, even if there are risks associated with it)

which is to say, the rabies condition: if a character has been ‘exposed to rabies’, aka, in some impending absolute worst-case scenario, like the apocalypse or some death curse or the destruction of their entire city via demons or whatever, then that character has to take action and the consequences and risks no longer matter, because literally any other outcome would be better, and 1% chance of survival is still better than 0%. that doesn’t make those actions necessarily good, the same way that injecting yourself with something you know you’re deadly allergic not a good thing to do, but it’s still better than dying horrifically of rabies. desperate times and desperate measures etc

and then, after your character’s prevented some horrible thing by doing some almost equally bad thing, they should absolutely experience the consequences of those choices.

[themunflower]

IT IS ALMOST THAT TIME AGAIN...

Sooo, since I've been doing this for so long I MIGHT be legally classifiable as insane…

Top Ten Most Uncomfortable Goretober Entries I've Done!

Now, because this is outside of October, when you guys usually expect this blog to turn into a slaughterfest, the rest of this post will be under a readmore. if you have trigger issues with ANY of the following:

Blood Graphic Depictions of Death by Burning Infant Death Torture Self-Harm Fucked Up Relationships that border on Stockholm Syndrome Rabies Mentions of Radiation Sickness

DON'T CLICK THAT READMORE! You might also wanna not click that if you're at work or at school right now.

Also, minor note: I won't be reposting the flavor text for each of these here as this post is long enough as it is. I would suggest clicking the links to read those, because these DO have a bit of story attached you're missing if you don't read them... >:D

----------

Number 10:

Sooo, I can't seem to find the OG post. It may have been on one of my original RP blogs, from back before I had a personal. BUT: This one is here because even though the quality is questionable, this was the first Goretober I drew that made me legit uncomfortable. Something about the eyes, man. I think I got the idea across that the vitreous humors inside of them are literally boiling QUITE well.

Number 9:

(I have this one linked with no repost due to triggering subject matter, so I will repeat the original content warning here:

"WARNING! Day 13 is below a readmore due to a depiction of a dead baby. It's not the focal point of the piece, but since injury and death of specifically babies is a potentially triggering subject for many, I decided to err on the side of caution. Do NOT click that if you have trigger issues regarding infant death."

I am serious, do NOT click that if you are triggered by depictions of infant death!)

Original Post: https://www.tumblr.com/themunflower/698046951200112640/goretober-2022-day-13-thanatophobia?source=share

Oh boy, so this made me legit uncomfortable for a couple of reasons. First off: Despite not being a parent and drawing shit like THIS for 31 straight days every October, I do have a soft spot for babies. Yeah, surprising, I know. Second: Adeleine is one of my fave characters from the Kirby series, and she's generally depicted as a nice girl. So drawing her having a full-on PTSD flashback to the day her old world ended had me feeling like the world's biggest asshole.

Number 8:

Original Post: https://www.tumblr.com/themunflower/179475710863/goretober-day-26-fallen?source=share

Similar to number 10, but the improved art quality placed it higher. Unfortunately, the similarity also stopped it from placing higher. Still, the fact that Cullan BARELY looks like a human anymore due to the fact that he's burning AND melting gives this one an "ick" factor that number 10 just doesn't have. Eh, 8 isn't a bad showing.

Number 7:

Original Post: https://www.tumblr.com/themunflower/151355944268/goretober-day-4-torture?source=share

This one is… It's mostly the implications that give me that uncomfortable little squirm. Questionable art quality aside, Alphys has snapped SO hard that not only did she manage to overpower the Human halfway into a geno run when they've got some levels on them, she's perverted the concept of Mercy into something WAY worse than the Human and/or the player could EVER do.

Number 6:

Original Post: https://www.tumblr.com/themunflower/188097491563/goretober-2019-day-2-acid?source=share

THIS IS AN ACTUAL EVENT IN THIS GAME. And it is legit uncomfortable to watch. Like, the best way I can describe it is that Uro seems to have her head on a fair bit straighter compared to many YN Fangame protags. So seeing her losing her mind after being forcibly dosed with something hallucinogenic to the point she starts violently bashing her head on GLASS to try to make it stop is genuinely distressing.

Number 5:

Original Post: https://www.tumblr.com/themunflower/731468910925348865/goretober-2023-day-17?source=share

WERE GETTING INTO THE TOP HALF NOW. ABANDON HOPE ALL WHO ENTER.

So this one… I actually had to take a moment a couple of times while drawing it. Not because of the gore, but because of the connotations. The way I tend to write Dark Ripple, her devotion to her boss is NOT a healthy one. Think Harley and the Joker, but somehow even MORE fucked up. Think those guys who ACTUALLY want a real-life yandere, just gender-flipped. Like, seriously, if this is the kind of relationship you want, get help.

Number 4:

Original Post: https://www.tumblr.com/themunflower/665418233647661056/goretober-2021-day-18-glitch?source=share

Fun fact about me: Radiation sickness scares the FUCK out of me. It destroys your body at the sub-cellular level, basically causing you to decay to death. That fear of mine? I was actually tapping into that when I drew this. After all, what is code but the equivalent of cells for a program?

Number 3:

Original Post: https://www.tumblr.com/themunflower/631282388600848384/goretober-day-6-medical-horror?source=share

WARNING! We got another that was under a readmore due to content extreme by even MY standards. So once again, I will be repeating the warning here. View at your own risk:

WARNING!! I'm not sure what to tag this as, so I'm gonna give it my best shot. Body Horror that might be disturbing, even by Goretober standards. If you've ever read "Uzumaki", the end of the chapter with the strangely addictive "mushrooms" should give you a good idea of what to expect, should you click that readmore.

This was… Yeah, I was not exaggerating when I said this was uncomfortable to draw. I don't even know where to begin with all the layers of squick that made this one of the rare Goretobers where I wondered if I was going too far. If you know anything about the character herself, it makes it even WORSE. So why did I do it? I wanted to prove something to myself by forcing myself WAY out of my comfort zone. Maybe I AM insane.

Number 2:

Original Post: https://www.tumblr.com/themunflower/178844421378/goretober-day-7-rabies?source=share

Where I live, one of the first things kids are taught as soon as they're old enough to understand is to stay TF away from any animal that "isn't acting right." And for good reason: RABIES IS FUCKING TERRIFYING. I watched a documentary about someone dying from it who agreed to let himself be filmed. I HAD FUCKING NIGHTMARES FOR WEEKS. I am NOT easy to scare, so that should tell you something.

Number 1:

Original Post: https://www.tumblr.com/themunflower/179202589378/goretober-day-18-wings?source=share

… I know only the aftermath is shown, but fuck me runnin', THE IMPLICATIONS. The absolute depths of despair and self-hate Lace had to have been feeling to do something so painful. JUST to feel normal, knowing it would only be temporary. The fact that she's barely even reacting to the blood and pain… She's at such a low point mentally she can't even feel PAIN. The thought that such a level of despair is even reachable legit makes me fear the very concept of emotions…

So, see you all again this year! :D

[myshredda]

Hi again, I'm the anon that asked about names and I'm working on my thing, but I've been rewatching both seasons a ton to get characterization right and oh my god. I finally get the implications at the end of Love. Do you have any fluffy headcanons to distract me bc I'm lowkey freaked out right now lmao. I will never be able to look at Shrignold the same again oh my god

Hello! Glad to hear you're still working on your fic 🥰 I hope it's going well! And yes. The love episode... the one with the catchiest song and the creepiest undertones :/ (I don't think there's concrete vibes of what's supposed to be 'implied' tbh, i think it's mainly commentary on how cults can prey on the venerable with a weird fucking unnerving bit at the end for some good gore/shock value shots, or at least that's what i'm telling myself to feel better lol)

A lot of my fluffier headcanons are already in a couple of my fics or are being kicked around on this blog!

Duck cooks the most (based on his curry and the lovely chicken picnic) in my AU specifically he's started to cook more carb-y foods because he wants to make sure they're all eating enough, much like a grandma immediately feeding you the second you step foot in the house, it's how he shows love

Red is the designated tall person and is always the one that has to get things down from high places. He'll also take things away from the other two and stash them up high if they're annoying him or fighting over something, and will leave it up there until everyone's calmed down

Due to the significant lack of lips in this family they can't really 'kiss' each other so Red's taken to headbutting as a form of endearment (which is something I do!) and will kind of press his forehead onto the other persons and leave it there. Duck pretends not to like it but he loves it. Yellow loves it so much he gets excited and will accidentally headbutt the others at like 1000 miles an hour and potentially knock himself and the other person out

Duck specifically preens the others as a form of endearment, and he loves playing with the other's hair in the way birds preen other bird's feathers. He'll help Red get knots and things out of his yarn and he likes to fiddle with Yellow's hair if he thinks it's too messy (all while scolding them for looking sloppy of course)

(sometimes he'll nibble at them with his beak if he's feeling especially lovey-dovey, it's all very adorable)

(Yellow really REALLY loves it when he does that and just shrieks with laughter the whole time)

Red and Duck's love language is bickering and bitching at each other, all in a very passive aggressive british way of course. Very much old married couple vibes there, but in a way where they'll tell each other to shut the fuck up with love and then make dinner together while drinking wine or whatever it is old men do

Duck and Yellow also like to bicker with each other and make jokes, Yellow loves to call Duck old because he gets all pissy about it and Duck will make him do extra chores as punishment for being disrespectful but will usually help out if he thinks Yellow is being too slow (which he always does) This relationship is heavily based on the relationship I have with my mother, everything's a joke and we're always talking shit until it isn't and then it's all love

Also 100% my mother would bite me and give me rabies if I was pissing her off I don't think that affects Duck's parental status that's like normal and also they're british so....

Red is a HUGE snuggler, especially in my AU where he's getting chubbier and learning to be happy. He uses his bigger size to kind of pounce on whoever he wants to hug and squeeze them and shake them around because he can't contain or verbalize how much he cares about them

If Yellow has any trouble sleeping he just crawls into one of the other's beds (he's in the middle so it's usually 50/50 who he'll go to) and immediately steals the blankets and puts his cold feet on their legs. The other two are usually don't care (red) or claim they're too tired to move him (but actually doesn't mind that much) (duck)

They all stim. Duck rocks in his chair or flaps his wings, Red hums and fiddles with whatever's in his hands, Yellow kicks his feet and flaps his hands, he also has the tendency to dance around when he's happy.

Yellow would 100% be that kid that loves Minecraft and slime

He tries to make slime one time and gets it caught in Red's yarn and cries his eyes out because he thinks it's going to make Red bald and bald people scare him

Duck makes Red wash his head in the sink and somehow gets it all out and then Yellow cries more because he's happy Red isn't going to be bald

Duck 100% watches old lady british soap operas and BBC murder series like Midsomer Murders or Vera or Miss Fisher's Murder Mysteries (Australian but whatever)

Yellow watches kids tv shows on PBS or HBO Family, Documentary series about animals (or any other NPR smart people show) the news, numbers stations, and british morning talkshows

Red watches whatever is on tv that the other two want to watch and I feel like he probably likes to watch footy

they all love each other very much because I SAID SO

[demogordon]

It's been a month since Vol2 and I'm still pissed at certain things and other stuff confuses me, like the pacing from ep7 to ep8. Nancy got vecna'ed in the middle of the night but the next time we saw this group it was suddenly bright outside. Like I don't understand how they could sit there for hours and don't even attempt to address Steve's wounds, homeboy went shirtless, dirty, bleeding through his makeshift bandages and with no shoes to a gun store and everyone was okay with that? I mean I kinda knew they wouldn't address his injuries because it's Steve so the writers don't give a fuck but man Robin panicking an episode earlier about rabies and yet they don't even bother to disinfect his wounds at the very least. I know this show is not realistic but I wish they would have taken his injuries, which were so fucking gnarly more seriously. The first thing I would have done is drive him to a hospital, fuck vecna I mean it took them hours of seemingly doing nothing to come up with the plan or talk about what Nancy saw, they could have had time to take care of this. Also I don't understand how he was even able to function let alone do the pull up from the UD to the normal world. The amount of pain he must have been in, unimaginable. Steve's build absolutely different, like he's a super human or something. But my guess the Duffers simply don't care about the implications of Steve's injuries.

Sorry for this rant, I'm just working on this fic which is about Vol2 and yeah it just frustrated me how off the pacing was or how little the writers cared about the characters feelings. 🙃

anon, you’ve hit the nail on the head. first, i want to address steve’s injuries. they’re not so bad he’s incapacitated but he would certainly have limited mobility and struggle to do any of the physical activities he later does. also, you need to apply pressure to stop bleeding and the reason you bandage open wounds is to prevent bacteria from getting in. nancy’s sweater that she tears from is NASTY. she’s run around, fought, and dove into a lake. that sweater is a cesspool of bacteria so it’s sort of like instead of protecting steves open wounds from bacteria, they skipped a step and just shoveled it in, which is an awesome way to get sepsis and die. the bests course of action would have been to get the sweater off of him as fast as possible and to disinfect with soap and water (not alcohol, which actually prevents wounds from closing as fast as they could) and then bandage with clean gauze. nancy should have driven as someone else, probably max because of her first aid knowledge, helped patch him up reliably.

speaking of the weird time shit: the duffers don’t seem to understand their own times or dates or how long things take. it’s like. midday by the time they’re driving to get all their weapons. they would have had the conversation with nancy about vecna in the early hours of the morning, maybe as the sky is getting light and formulated a plan earlier in a realistic timeline. this is also a bone my mother brought up to pick that she didn’t understand why the fuck steve didn’t have the girls lob molotov cocktails and shoot at vecna and sneak up behind him and chop his head off with the axe he had. her idea was that hopper and steve’s slicy activities should have been intercut as they were done simultaneously. but the duffers need vecna for season five so they couldn’t do something that makes sense.

[myhyperfixationisiforgot]

ME. I AM PEOPLE.

Anyways. There are so many things that get changed or glossed over that just completely erode the actual theme the book puts together.

They completely eliminate the narrative about Sejanus Plinth's mother, which is arguably one of the most important aspects of Snow's arc. Coriolanus repeatedly refers to Sejanus and his mother as backwards, dumb, uncivilized, and ungrateful. Sure, the movie talks about how his father uses his money to buy them a place in the Capitol, but never how uncomfortable and horrified Sejanus and Ma are with their position, or how Coriolanus uses the pair for his own gain.

The movie also repeatedly pretends like Lucy Gray isn't willing to murder anyone? Wovey, the little girl, doesn't die in the snakes in the book. She's the one Lucy Gray poisons, and the book gives no implication that it was meant for someone else or anything. She also poisons Reaper, in the end, although honestly I could talk for days about how the movie portrays Reaper.

When the snakes bite Clemmie in the lab, there is no one waiting with the antidote. A couple of lab assistants drag her to the hospital next door, screaming the entire time. Gaul doesn't mention anything about "a sudden flu," and the doctor at the hospital mentions that this isn't the first lab accident to come to them.

Lysistrata - Jessup's mentor - has her personality stripped away. I would argue that she's the one who actually cares deeply for her tribute and the other people around her, not Coriolanus. Her interview after Jessup's death is important because it goes out of it's way to say that he contracted rabies IN THE CAPITOL, not on the train or in the districts. Jessup dies because the Capitol can't be bothered to treat the tributes like human beings, and the movie completely glosses over it.

Anyways. I could keep going. I will not talk about the fucking snake scene because that's a whole post on its own. If you enjoyed the movie but haven't read the book, it's a great read, and it adds a lot of depth that all of the Hunger Games adaptations seem deathly allergic to.

“Stop simping for snow”

“Here’s my new Snow fanfic”

Like bro IDEC

where r the people who wanna talk about the details from the book that were left out of the movie???

[antivirus-mh-au]

Antivirus - Chapter 4

First Chapter Previous Chapter Ao3 Link TW: None Note: I am completely exhausted and working on a laggy computer. I will add these links when I’m not a zombie trying to use a zombie laptop. Thank you for your patience.

Click the link. Let the page load, the old laptop whirring as it opened. A YouTube video, like so many others. Opening shot, an abandoned building in the middle of the night, muffled voices talking.

Shrieking, screaming. The camera lowered as the one holding it ducks for cover. Four voices yelling at once. Suddenly, laughter. Relieved laughter.

"Fucking bats!" A man called out. The camera raising, focusing on the dark shapes fluttering out the window.

"We need to be careful," a woman said, voice light-hearted. "Those things carry rabies."

Laughter breaking through the group again, a logo of a camera appearing on the screen.

He paused the video and glanced down at the title. "OUR GREATEST HITS, VOLUME ONE." 

He sent a text to his friend.

Phoenix: who are these assholes?

The reply was immediate.

Skully: they're my assholes. College kids I made friends with on Twitter. Really cool. I don't remember being that cool when I was twenty.

He grunted aloud. Lucky him, remembering anything about his twenties. Not everyone was so fortunate.

Skully: They’re part of the MH fandom. They actually live in Alabama and were able to track down some of the locations in the videos.

He rolled his eyes.

Phoenix: Find any bodies?

Skully: Just blood.

He shuddered, pulling his hooded jacket closer to his body.

Phoenix: Cool. Morbid, but cool.

He was such a liar.

Skully: Anyway, not what I was sending them to you about. They just made a new video today and I think you might be interested in it

He grimaced.

Phoenix: This is about your crazy boyfriend, isn’t it?

Skully: He’s not my boyfriend!! I don’t know him!!!

Skully: And you know my partner doesn't share.

Phoenix: But it’s still about him. The prophet guy.

Skully: … Yeah. But you should still watch this! I think you’ll find it interesting

He leaned back against the wall and huffed.

Phoenix: Why?

Skully: … the kids talk about Tim, alright?

Skully: They talk about him a lot.

His fingers hesitated over the keys. He lingered, reading the words again and again. Tim…?

Phoenix: Fine.

Phoenix: Send me the video.

The video, almost thirty minutes long, took its sweet time to load. First thing on screen was the same logo as before, a camera with a generic full face mask behind it. The name of the channel followed, MH Unlocked. He shook his head.

The name faded out, replaced by three people on a couch. Two women, one man. A second man sat on top of an end table on the right side of the couch. The lamp that probably belonged in that spot sat on the floor at his dangling feet.

The woman on the left, a bushy haired brunette with deep tan skin, a high ponytail and golden brown eyes, gave the camera a grin.

"Hey investigators!" She waved. "We're back with another video."

"And this one's a doozy," the woman beside her said, raising her mug, which proudly bore a pride flag. If he had to guess, it was the lesbian one. Her hair was dyed orange, peachy skin flushed by makeup or a light sunburn, it was hard to tell.

"Before we start," the first woman said, "be sure to leave a like and give us your thoughts and theories in the comments! I promise, we read all of them."

"Eventually," said the man on the end table with a grin. He was the palest white guy ever, with curly black hair, glasses, and about a thousand freckles on his face. The man next to him gave him a shove, and the first man burst into laughter. 

The other man, with skin several shades darker than the brunette and a suit far too good looking for this kind of environment, rolled his eyes. He waved a hand, with a silver ring on his index finger, at the camera.

"You already know us," he said. "I'm Mix."

"I'm Holly!" The brunette on the other end said.

"I'm Wren," the orange haired woman said.

"And I'm Steve!" The freckled man grinned wide, his green eyes practically glowing with excitement. "We've got a big story for you guys today."

"Oh, very big," Wren said, before taking a drink from her mug.

"Big like the worst headache you've ever had," Mix said with a smiling roll of his eyes. Wren smacked him on the shoulder without looking away from her drink.

"So." Holly reached up from the floor and pulled up a laptop. The brand logo was covered up with a pineapple sticker. Her eyes scanned the screen as she fiddled with the touchpad, Wren leaning over to see what she was doing.

"Last night," Holly said. "Something weird happened over on the Neophyte_Calling YouTube channel."

"Weirder than normal," Wren said.

"Yeah," Holly said. She glanced over towards Steve, who swiped at the screen of his phone. He looked up.

"We'd show the footage but people don’t seem to like when we do that," Steve said. "Something something spreading the sickness." He shrugged with a smile. "But we've all watched it and we can give you a play by play of what happened."

"It might not seem that dramatic," Wren said, "but the implications are pretty intense."

"I'll say," Mix said. 

"Last night, at around ten pm," Holly started, "in the middle of his usual stream, the Neophyte went quiet. The way he does when whatever he's supposedly channeling is trying to talk through him. After about thirty seconds of silence, he started bleeding onto the table from his head, which remember, is mostly off screen. He said, "he's coming," and fell over as the screen glitched out. For another hour there was complete silence before the stream randomly ended."

"Weird shit," Steve said.

Holly nodded. "Very weird shit - but in character for him."

"Now, for those of you that don't know who the Neophyte is," Mix said, "he's the guy you see people calling 'the Prophet' in this fandom. Talks like a drug addict on a high, but many people believe there are secret messages in his words that can be decoded. They say those messages predict the future."

"Not everyone believes this," Holly said.

"I don't," Steve said, hunched over and watching his friends. "But there's definitely something funny-weird about the guy. Very… uncanny valley."

"Sometimes, unprompted, he'll stop talking and do this creepy voice." Holly cleared her throat, and when she spoke again, she lowered her voice, taking on an odd pitch to her words. "Grains of sand in the hourglass of time. Your existence is irrelevant." She shuddered, and let her voice go back to normal. "Something like that."

"That's an awful impression but it gets the job done," Mix said.

"You try doing one better," Holly said.

"The one thing all of these coherent messages have in common," Wren said, "is that they're all addressed to the same person. Someone called Tim."

Steve nodded. "And you can guess who most people think that 'Tim' is."

"It's been ten years since Marble Hornets ended," Mix said. "But it would make sense if it were Tim Wright the Neophyte was talking to. He was the only survivor, after all."

"But that would imply that Tim is watching the Neophyte streams," Wren said.

"And if he's watching the streams, he could be aware of us, too," Holly said.

The four went quiet. Mix looked at the floor. Steve traded a look of discomfort with Holly. Wren took a sip of her mug. She pulled it away from her lips with a sigh.

"If he does know about us," Wren said, "why not come forward and tell his side of the story? He could change the whole game by revealing himself."

"Probably because he's a fucking murderer," Steve said. Mix glared at him, but Steve only shrugged. "You know I'm right!"

"He did kill two people," Holly said, looking at her laptop. "Just because Kralie killed Jay doesn't make what Tim did right."

"But what other choice did he have?" Mix said. "Alex wouldn't have stopped trying to kill Tim. One of them needed to die."

"That doesn't matter to the legal system," Holly said.

"We're getting off topic," Wren said, raising a hand. "It doesn't matter if the Neophyte was talking about Tim from Marble Hornets or not. What matters is that someone is going somewhere and that's apparently good news for the Neophyte or whatever he's channeling."

"You can say the Operator, it's okay," Steve said.

Holly glared at him from over Wren's head.

"It does matter, though, if he's talking about Tim in particular," Mix said. "What if Tim is heading back to Alabama? Maybe he left after the end of the series."

"It's possible," Holly said, "but that's pure speculation. We don't know that."

"Isn't speculation all we do?" Steve said, swinging his legs gently. "Come on, let's give the audience something to chew on. What do you guys think the Neophyte was talking about? The crazier the theory, the better."

Mix frowned. "Well…"

With a shake of his head, the viewer closed the tab. He'd seen enough. Enough to make his eyes burn and hands shake. He took a deep breath, and shuddered, pulling his jacket around himself. It was a warm day beyond the safe confines of this abandoned house, but that didn't stop the chills shooting through him.

Was he afraid? Or was he angry? 

With a growl he thrust the laptop away from him and reached for his sketchbook. The pen he'd been using before still rested inside. Forcing his thoughts away from the video, he focused everything in his mind onto his art.

He wasn't a great artist, but his memory was good, and with nothing else to do most days, his skill was getting better. With proper art tools, he could've even gotten great at it. But there was no need for greatness right now. Art was supposed to be healing, and that more than anything was what he needed.

In his mind he captured the image, something he'd seen so many times before. Grinding his teeth, he let the image flow onto the page once more. His favorite thing to draw, the one thing that really made him smile.

Losing track of time was part of the appeal. With the light from his laptop, he could see the whole page, or at least enough of it to work. The ink bled into the paper, the lines assembling into a rough image that soon became a face. He could see it so well in his mind's eye. As if the man he pictured was right in front of him. But he wasn't. And if the man knew what was good for him, he'd stay that way.

The sound of a new message on Discord got his attention. He glanced at the time instead. An hour, flown by, his mind lost in an ink-based daydream. Exhaling hard, he looked back at the art on the page. It wasn't finished. It would probably never be finished. But as it was… it was perfect.

Tim Wright made a very good model, unaware of that as he was.

Running his hand over the page, feeling the indents where his pen dug deep into the paper, he shook his head, and smiled.

"Better not be coming back, Tim," the man, the Maniac, said. "If you do… I'll have to kill you.”

[dailytafsirofquran]

Tafsir Ibn Kathir: Surah Al-Baqarah Ayah 3

In the Name of Allah, the Most Gracious, the Most Merciful.

3. Who believe in the Ghayb and perform the Salah and spend out of what We have provided for them

The Meaning of Iman

Allah says;

Abu Jafar Ar-Razi said that Al-Ala bin Al-Musayyib bin Rafi narrated from Abu Ishaq that Abu Al-Ahwas said that Abdullah said, "Iman is to trust.''

Ali bin Abi Talhah reported that Ibn Abbas said, (who have faith), means they trust.

Also, Ma`mar said that Az-Zuhri said, "Iman is the deeds.''

In addition, Abu Jafar Ar-Razi said that Ar-Rabi bin Anas said that, `They have faith', means, they fear (Allah).

Ibn Jarir (At-Tabari) commented, "The preferred view is that they be described as having faith in the Unseen by the tongue, deed and creed. In this case, fear of Allah is included in the general meaning of Iman, which necessitates following deeds of the tongue by implementation.

Hence, Iman is a general term that includes affirming and believing in Allah, His Books and His Messengers, and realizing this affirmation through adhering to the implications of what the tongue utters and affirms.''

Linguistically, in the absolute sense, Iman merely means trust, and it is used to mean that sometimes in the Qur'an, for instance, Allah the Exalted said, He trusts (yu'minu) in Allah, and trusts (yu'minu) in the believers. (9: 61)

Prophet Yusuf's brothers said to their father,

But you will never believe us even when we speak the truth. (12:17)

Further, the word Iman is sometimes mentioned along with deeds, such as Allah said,

Save those who believe (in Islamic Monotheism) and do righteous deeds. (95:6)

However, when Iman is used in an unrestricted manner, it includes beliefs, deeds, and statements of the tongue. We should state here that Iman increases and decreases.

There are many narrations and Hadiths on this subject, and we discussed them in the beginning of our explanation of Sahih Al-Bukhari, all favors are from Allah.

Some scholars explained that Iman means Khashyah (fear of Allah). For instance, Allah said; Verily, those who fear their Lord unseen (i.e. they do not see Him, nor His punishment in the Hereafter). (67:12)

Who feared the Most Gracious (Allah) in the Ghayb (unseen) and brought a heart turned in repentance (to Him and absolutely free from every kind of polytheism). (50: 33)

Fear is the core of Iman and knowledge, just as Allah the Exalted said,

It is only those who have knowledge among His servants that fear Allah. (35:28)

The Meaning of Al-Ghayb

As for the meaning of Ghayb here, the Salaf have different explanations of it, all of which are correct, indicating the same general meaning.

For instance, Abu Jafar Ar-Razi quoted Ar-Rabi bin Anas, reporting from Abu Al-Aliyah about Allah's statement, (Those who) have faith in the Ghayb), "They believe in Allah, His angels, Books, Messengers, the Last Day, His Paradise, Fire and in the meeting with Him. They also believe in life after death and in Resurrection. All of this is the Ghayb.''

Qatadah bin Di`amah said similarly.

Sa`id bin Mansur reported from Abdur-Rahman bin Yazid who said, "We were sitting with Abdullah bin Mas`ud when we mentioned the Companions of the Prophet and their deeds being superior to our deeds.

Abdullah said, `The matter of Muhammad was clear for those who saw him. By He other than Whom there is no God, no person will ever acquire a better type of faith than believing in Al-Ghayb.'

He then recited,

Alif Lam Mim. This is the Book, wherein there is no doubt, guidance for the Muttaqin. Those who believe in the Ghayb, until, (the successful).''

Ibn Abi Hatim, Ibn Marduwyah and Al-Hakim, in his Mustadrak, recorded this Hadith.

Al-Hakim commented that this Hadith is authentic and that the Two Sheikhs - Al-Bukhari and Muslim - did not collect it, although it meets their criteria.

Ahmad recorded a Hadith with similar meaning from Ibn Muhayriz who said: I said to Abu Jumu`ah, "Narrate a Hadith for us that you heard from the Messenger of Allah.''

He said, "Yes. I will narrate a good Hadith for you.

Once we had lunch with the Messenger of Allah. Abu Ubaydah, who was with us, said, `O Messenger of Allah!

Are people better than us We embraced Islam with you and performed Jihad with you.'

He said,

Yes, those who will come after you, who will believe in me although they did not see me.''

This Hadith has another route collected by Abu Bakr bin Marduwyah in his Tafsir, from Salih bin Jubayr who said: Abu Jumu`ah Al-Ansari, the Companion of the Messenger of Allah, came to Bayt Al-Maqdis (Jerusalem) to perform the prayer. Raja' bin Haywah was with us, so when Abu Jumu`ah finished, we went out to greet him. When he was about to leave, he said, "You have a gift and a right. I will narrate a Hadith for you that I heard from the Messenger of Allah.''

We said, "Do so, and may Allah grant you mercy.''

He said, "We were with the Messenger of Allah, ten people including Mu`adh bin Jabal. We said, "O Messenger of Allah! Are there people who will acquire greater rewards than us We believed in Allah and followed you.'

He said,

What prevents you from doing so, while the Messenger of Allah is among you, bringing you the revelation from heaven There are people who will come after you and who will be given a book between two covers (the Qur'an), and they will believe in it and implement its commands. They have a greater reward than you, even twice as much.''

Allah says; And perform Salah, and spend out of what we have provided for them.

Meaning of Iqamat As-Salah

Ibn Abbas said that, (And perform the Salah), means, "Perform the prayer with all of the obligations that accompany it.''

Ad-Dahhak said that Ibn Abbas said, "Iqamat As-Salah means to complete the bowings, prostrations, recitation, humbleness and attendance for the prayer.''

Qatadah said, "Iqamat As-Salah means to preserve punctuality, and the ablution, bowings, and prostrations of the prayer.''

Muqatil bin Hayyan said Iqamat As-Salah means, "To preserve punctuality for it, as well as completing ones purity for it, and completing the bowings, prostrations, recitation of the Qur'an, Tashahhud and blessings for the Prophet. This is Iqamat As-Salah.''

The Meaning of "Spending'' in this Ayah

Ali bin Abi Talhah reported that Ibn Abbas said, (And spend out of what We have provided for them) means, "The Zakah due on their wealth.''

As-Suddi said that Abu Malik and Abu Salih narrated from Ibn Abbas, as well as Murrah from Ibn Mas`ud and other Companions of the Messenger of Allah, that, (And spend out of what We have provided for them) means, "A man's spending on his family. This was before the obligation of Zakah was revealed.''

Juwaybir narrated from Ad-Dahhak, "General spending (in charity) was a means of drawing nearer to Allah, according to one's discretion and capability. Until the obligation of charity was revealed in the seven Ayat of Surah Bara’h, were revealed. These abrogated the previous case.''

In many instances, Allah mentioned prayer and spending wealth together.

* Prayer is a right of Allah as well as a form of worshipping Him. It includes singling Him out for one's devotion, praising Him, glorifying Him, supplicating to Him, invoking Him, and it displays one's dependence upon Him.

* Spending is form of kindness towards creatures by giving them what will benefit them, and those people most deserving of this charity are the relatives, the wife, the servants and then the rest of the people. So all types of required charity and required spending are included in Allah's saying, (And spend out of what we have provided for them).

The Two Sahihs recorded that Ibn Umar said that the Messenger of Allah said,

Islam is built upon five (pillars):

* Testifying that there is no deity worthy of worship except Allah and that Muhammad is the Messenger of Allah,

* establishing the prayer,

* giving Zakah,

* fasting Ramadan and

* Hajj to the House.

There are many other Hadiths on this subject.

The Meaning of Salah

In the Arabic language, the basic meaning of Salah is supplication. In religious terminology, Salah is used to refer to the acts of bowing and prostration, the remaining specified acts associated with it, specified at certain times, with those known conditions, and the characteristics, and requirements that are well-known about it.

[inkwell-and-dagger]

this is mostly based off of a conversation me and ash had yesterday in which ash said madir gives werewolf vibes and then I mistook janus from greek mythology (?) for janus from sanders sides and then he said esrana gives vampire vibes and foster gives snake vibes and then I said it could have like religious or biblical implications because of the fall n shit which led to the janus thing. then we talked about rabies idk

WOULD YALL BE INTERESTED IN A HTKAI AU WHERE RAYAN IS MORTAL AND FOSTER, ESRANA, MADIR, EZRA AND ZAYN ARE NONHUMAN??? KINDA LIKE A REVERSAL AU??

[three--rings]

Fatal Journey Liveblog Reaction

I wasn’t sure if I’d have anything to say about this, but 15 minutes in...yeah we need to talk.

Spoilers below!

Okay, I was actually feeling like JGY was going to have a very small part in this, and maybe he does, but I wasn’t expecting to see him so SOON.  Like, I have SUCH COMPLICATED FEELINGS ABOUT THAT TINY BASTARD MAN.  I can’t with him, omg.  I’m a victim of my own fanfiction that’s made me feel so much for him.

And honestly, like, so much credit to ZZJ because it’s a difficult part to play.  He’s a scheming villain, but also...you really have to believe he means a lot of what he says.  Like the advice he gives to NHS about how to deal with his brother...it’s GOOD ADVICE.  No, maybe you aren’t good with swords, but you’re good at other things and if the two of you work together your brother will see your strengths.  And I always felt like JGY DOES really like NHS and sees some of himself in him (IRONICALLY AHEM).

And DAMN just giving those two one scene together has made me want to ship them.  For MAXIMUM ANGST OMG.  Also, just, the way that the two of them are both slightly frail and less masculine, love art and fine things, are really smart, victims of bullies....yeah.

And then the fucking CQL theme kicks in and it’s all majestic and I am HAVING FUCKING EMOTIONS Y’ALL.  It’s been a minute since I watched or listened to the series and HOLY CRAP.  (Also NMJ looks good on a horse.)

Oh hey, I’ve read that fanfic!  (LOL)

Well, shit Huaisang ain’t exactly wrong about the sword spirits.  They’re sacrificing humans to maintain their own martial prowess and power within the cultivation world.  AND destroying themselves in the process.  And honestly, good for him for standing up to his brother like that.  You can see where he would actually be capable of being a good sect leader and probably winning his people’s loyalty, if he didn’t have to pretend to be an idiot.  Then again, he totally got that dude killed for his brush. (Also I’m glad I’m at a place where I can understand that when the subs say “evil” they’re saying Mo Dao.) 

Bats?  Are they some kind of evil vampire bat?  I mean, okay, guess there’s a danger of rabies, but like, I’ve been around that many bats and it’s not terribly dangerous.  Also, hey NMJ can’t you just make your sword fly?  Maybe I don’t fully grasp the physics of flying goddamn swords.

Holy shit, he jumped.  Damn.  This movie is really making NHS look good.

I haven’t mentioned it yet, but NMJ has some FLY dragons on his shoulders.  I want some.  Also he says “Da-ge is sorry” (not I am sorry) and THAT made me emotional.

Okay, did this sword spirit go all This is Not My Final Form?  That was a very video game fight.

Yeeah, I was waiting for that.  Dammit, Jin Guangyao.  So basically, NMJ killed like most of those men, the whole time, right?  And NHS knew it and lied...damn.  Making NHS do that to his own brother, you are fucking LOW JGY.

I’m not sure what the implication is with the floating golden letters.  Is that a supernatural thing, like a spirit showing him, or is it a Sherlock-esque putting pieces together thing? 

Anyway, great last shot, we knew that already.  Was pretty sure that WOULD be the last shot, too. 

Overall, definitely much better than The Living Dead and a nice little fleshing out of a part of the story we didn’t get to see that much.  I’m glad the Nie Bros got a lot more screen-time.  As usual I could do with much less CGI fight scenes, but hey. 

[fantasyfoucault]

Course Post #5: Counterfactualizing and What-if-izing the NFL

Dave Dameshek’s counterfactual series the N‘if’L. In this video he stepped into an alternate reality where Eli Manning stayed with the Chargers instead of requesting a trade to New York. 

In Speculative Everything: Design, Fiction and Social Dreaming, Anthony Dunne and Fiona Raby argue for other alternatives to design that aren’t simply problem solving. They believe that other possibilities for design are to “speculating how things could be—speculative design . . . [that] thrives on imagination and aims to open up new perspectives . . . to create spaces for discussion and debate about alternative ways of being, and to inspire and encourage people’s imaginations to flow freely . . . [which] can act as a catalyst for collectively redefining our relationship to reality” (2). They present several categories and methods of speculative design throughout the book, but one that caught my attention the most was Ch. 5’s “A Methodological Playground: Fictional Worlds and Thought Experiments.” Raby and Dunne describe speculative design in literature, cinema, and art. For instance, “fictional world building” like Margaret Atwood’s Oryx and Crake designs a speculative postapocalyptic world roaming with transgenic animals and a society that is desensitized to unethical capitalist practices, a fictional world that is “far more interested in the social, cultural, and ethical implications of science and technology than the technology itself” (78). Thought experiments, which “allow us to step outside reality for a moment to try something out . . . [t]hey make full use of the imagination and are often beautiful designs in themselves,” are closer to conceptual design than conventional design and allows us to step out of the factual and into the speculative and imaginative realm of possibilities (80). Two forms of thought experiments I am intrigued by are counterfactuals and what-ifs, both of which alter reality by enabling us to imagine an alternative past or future that change our present realities. A counterfactual is “[a] historical fact [that] is changed to see what might have happened, if . . .” key influences and events had turned out differently and how these alternate endings could have affected the world” (82). This made me think of Dave Dameshek, a radio personality, football analyst and writer for NFL.com, and his series called the “N‘if’L,” which is an animated series where he creates an alternate NFL landscape if notable events had gone differently than in reality. Being a Los Angeles Chargers fan, my favorite video is the one where Dameshek speculates a different NFL environment if Eli Manning had not forced a trade to the New York Giants and had stayed with the back-then San Diego Chargers in the 2004 NFL Draft. In this scenario Eli Manning would have stayed with the Chargers with the first overall pick, the Giants would have drafted Ben Roethlisberger at #4 and Philip Rivers would have fallen to the Steelers at #11. Best of all (for me), the Chargers would have won two Super Bowl rings under Eli Manning in ’06 and ’07 and altered NFL history as we know it. If only… What-ifs are similar to counterfactuals but are more future-oriented, speculating what the future could look like if certains situations unfold. They are “a simple way of excusing oneself from reality in order to entertain an . . . idea” (86). This time of year is what-if season in the NFL as the NFL draft approaches. Various NFL experts publish their “mock drafts,” an imaginative draft that attempts to predict what players NFL teams will be drafted based on the best available players, teams more urgent positional needs, the organization’s current infrastructural situation etc. These mock drafts serve as a way to create dialogue in the football community, especially in fantasy football discourse where anxious dynasty fantasy players are awaiting to see where this year’s promising class of rookies will land, thereby providing a situational context for which fantasy owners can assemble a draft strategy for their fantasy football team’s future (dynasty is a format that allows owners to keep their fantasy team each year rather than redraft format where a fantasy player drafts a new fantasy team each year, thereby delimiting the temporal limitations of fantasy football). These mock drafts change repeatedly throughout the draft season, too, like after the NFL combine and after trades or free agent signings have occurred, and analysts often give them different “version” names (X’s 2020 Mock 1.3, for instance). Mock drafts can be created by anyone, too, not just experts, which is the fun part about them. Anyone is welcome to participate in this speculative design of the NFL landscape with their own opinions.

A mock draft that I created for the 2019 NFL Draft. I only got 3/32 picks correct.

[devilsofficialfanfic]

The Purple Flame

Chapter 24: Worth Dying For (?)

A/N: Are y’all ready for this? I know I’m not. This was...an emotionally difficult chapter to write.

Content Warnings: violence, blood, the implication that space rabies exists

Keith fought like a wildfire, unpredictable and impossible to control, Lotor thought. He relied on his instincts more than anything else, and it had served him well so far.

Sendak’s prosthetic was rendered almost useless in the confined space of the ship, unless he wanted to risk damaging the hull of the thing. That would kill them all, Druid enhancements or no. That forced him to fight with a sword, or not fight at all.

Still, it was only him and Keith; that part felt right, but there were too many, and the enclosed space hindered Lotor, too. His fighting technique required space for him to maneuver around his larger, less mobile opponents.

But he would fight until Keith was safe, or until he couldn’t fight anymore.

And these were not Sendak’s elite soldiers, trained to his exacting standards, as Lotor himself had once been. These were the rabble of the Empire, those who had joined Haggar after Keith became Emperor, simply because they wouldn’t bow to a half-breed.

And no, they wouldn’t bow now, Lotor thought darkly, as he cut them down, but they would be prostrate before their emperor.

Lotor had been backed into a corner, but he cut down the last of the ordinary soldiers, and stepped away, only to be engaged by Sendak.

Sendak was smiling, which Lotor knew meant pain, but he was inured to that. And this would be the last time he’d face it, one way or the other.

Lotor returned Sendak’s smile, but he knew his grin was bloody -he could taste it, acid-sweet.

“Have you waited long for this moment, Sendak?” He asked. “For someone to put you down like the rabid animal you are?”

He dodged, right as Sendak aimed a blow at him, but the battle was beginning to wear at his stamina, and Sendak had not been fighting, just waiting for Lotor to wear himself out, so he could move in and deliver the killing blow.

“Even making you my slave would be too merciful,” Sendak hissed. “It’s good that Zarkon is dead; you bring only shame to him and his memory. He won’t have to witness what I will do to you.”

“Something unimaginative, I’m sure,” Lotor said, confidence in his voice, but he knew he couldn't hold Sendak off much longer. His mixed blood gave him more stamina and strength that the average Galra, but Sendak had accounted for that, waiting until the very end. It was just a matter of time.

Was Keith safe? That was the important part. It no longer mattered what happened to Lotor, as long as Keith was safe.

Ten thousand years, and he’d never found a cause worth dying for, until today.

He had to end this, even if it killed him. Just so long as Sendak couldn’t hurt Keith.

He deliberately left himself open, knowing that Sendak would take the bait; he wouldn’t be able to resist.

Sendak’s sword slid cleanly through his abdomen. There was brief, searing pain, and then blessed numbness.

He smiled, knowing that more blood trickled from the corners of his mouth, as he slid his own sword up and up and up, hearing Sendak gasp and shudder as the blade went through his heart, as Lotor pulled him closer, a mockery of a lover’s embrace. “Couldn't anticipate that, could you?” He asked rhetorically.

Sendak, of course, didn’t answer.

Lotor sank to his knees, then collapsed against the wall behind him. The sword was still buried in him, and that was for the best. Removing it would only make him bleed out faster, and he had things he wanted to tell Keith.

He knew he was dying; he’d seen a lot of battlefield injuries over the years, and unless the hand of some god intervened, this one was fatal.

Keith finished his own battle, and silence reigned on the bridge.

It was in lockdown, so no one could get in or out. It was just a matter of time before whatever officers were left broke through, but they had a few minutes.

Keith, covered in pink-violet blood that wasn’t his, stood tall and turned, savage delight morphing into heartbreak before Lotor’s very eyes.

Keith rushed over to him, heedless of the bodies strewn across the floor. Pooling blood made the floor sticky, but Keith didn’t care; he knelt at Lotor’s side.

“Are you alright?” Lotor asked, looking Keith up and down, searching for the telltale crimson of Keith’s blood. There was none, or at least, not enough to show through the violet gore that covered him.

“Lotor,” Keith breathed. “How can you-?”

“Hush,” Lotor said. He was aware, now, that his remaining time was short; he could no longer feel much of anything, except cold and tired. “You have to go.”

“No!”

“You must. The Empire needs you, Keith, beloved. There’s nothing now that you can do for me.”

“I’m not leaving you,” Keith said, stubborn as ever, tears beginning to streak down his cheeks, like shooting stars. “You’re going to be fine.”

Lotor would have laughed, but it was such an effort now, to even speak, and he must save his strength, because there were things he needed to say, even if Keith didn’t want to hear them. “I love you,” he said. “I love you, Keith. If yours is the last face I ever see, then I will be glad.”

“No,” Keith denied. “It won’t be. You’re going to be fine. I’ll get you out of here-“

“There’s no time for that.” Lotor doubled over, as far as he could with Sendak’s sword still in him, and coughed wetly. “Please, Keith, don’t let this be for nothing.”

It’s not,” Keith said, leaning in to rest his forehead against Lotor’s. “It’s not.”

With great effort- his entire body felt like it was light years away -Lotor brought a hand up to cup the back of Keith’s neck, perhaps the last bit of comfort he could give Keith.

“I love you,” he whispered again.

“I love you, too,” Keith whispered back, like he was afraid, like it hurt, and maybe it did.

“I wish we had more time,” Lotor said. “There are so many things I wanted to share with you.”

“We’ll have time,” Keith said.

“Perhaps in another life. Perhaps our souls will be drawn together once again. Perhaps we are happy in another reality.”

“Don’t leave me,” Keith whispered, brokenly.

Lotor’s vision had started spotting, graying at the edges. Every breath was a struggle. He just needed a little more time. Just a little more. Ten thousands years of life had led to this moment, and he just wanted a little more…

And then Keith was turning, having heard something, perhaps, and Lotor recognized the sound of rifle-fire, but he couldn’t-

It was so hard to think-

-Why was it important?

And then Keith’s voice: “Just a few minutes. Just stay with me for a few more minutes. Please-“

And then? Nothing.

[naturecpw]

The Moral Cost of Cats

A bird-loving scientist calls for an end to outdoor cats “once and for all.”

Smithsonian Magazine - Rachel E. Gross

Do outdoor cats need to die? 

Pete Marra is haunted by cats. He sees them everywhere: slinking down alleys, crouched under porches, glaring at him out of wild, starved eyes.        

People assume that Marra, head of the Smithsonian Migratory Bird Center and author of the book Cat Wars, hates cats. This is not the case. “I love cats,” he says, calling them “fascinating, magnificent animals,” that seem to have a “freakish love for me.” He’s even considered a pet cat, despite being mildly allergic. “This is the thing people don’t realize,” Marra told me at a café near his office in Washington, D.C. “I’m both a wild animal advocate and a domestic animal advocate. If my mother thought I wasn’t supporting cats, she’d be flipping in her grave.”        

It’s an understandable mistake. After all, Marra has made himself the public face of what sounds a lot like an anti-cat crusade. For years, the wildlife ecologist has been investigating the lethal implications of cats and urging that pet owners keep them indoors. He argues in Cat Wars: The Devastating Consequences of a Cuddly Killer, co-authored with freelance writer Chris Santella, the time has come for more drastic action: a concerted, nationwide effort to rid the landscape of cats. (The book is based on Marra’s personal and scientific research, and the views and conclusion are expressly his own and do not represent those of the Smithsonian Institution.)        

That effort will require an ugly reality: the targeted killing of felines. “No one likes the idea of killing cats," Marra concludes in his book. "But sometimes, it is necessary."        

Marra might like cats. But he also sees a bigger picture. In his day job, he and his team at the migratory bird center track the global movements of birds and tease apart threats to their existence. He knows that birds don’t just twit around pointlessly. They pollinate plants, spread seeds, control insects and protect environments from the effects of climate change; they are the glue that binds healthy ecosystems together. “Birds are critical,” he says. And outdoor cats, he and other ecologists have determined, are the leading human-influenced cause of dead birds.        

  In 1962, biologist Rachel Carson wrote that “in nature nothing exists alone.” Marra couldn’t agree more. Like Carson, he thinks of life on Earth as a complex tapestry in which each species represents a single thread. Outdoor cats threaten that tapestry. Their crimes include contributing to 33 extinctions around the world and counting, to say nothing of their potential to spread deadly diseases like rabies and Toxoplasmosis. They hold in tooth and claw the power to destroy that delicate web—like, well, a cat unraveling a ball of string.        

Americans own about 86 million cats, or one cat for every three households. That makes cats more popular, petwise, than dogs, and we haven’t even gotten to Internet memes yet. But not all pet cats are created equal. The majority of them—about two-thirds to three-fourths, surveys say—are your sweet, harmless, cuddly housecats, which seldom set foot outside. Marra takes no issue with these lap cats. Their instincts may be lethal, but they rarely get the chance to harm more than a house mouse. 

The other one-quarter to one-third, though, aren’t so harmless. These are outdoor pet cats, and they are murderers. Equipped with laser-quick paws and razor-tipped claws, these natural born killers are the stuff of every bird and small mammal’s nightmare. Often we love them for just this quality; the hard-working barn cat has nipped many a country mouse infestation in the bud. But sometimes their deadly instincts spell trouble for animals and ecosystems we value—and often, Marra argues, desperately need.        

Marra tells the story of Tibbles the cat, who traveled with her owner to an untouched island south of New Zealand in 1894. There, she single-pawedly caused the extinction of the Stephens Island wren, a small, flightless bird found only in that part of the world. Most cats aren’t as deadly as Tibbles, but your average outdoor pet cat still kills around two animals per week, according to the Wildlife Society and the American Bird Conservancy. The solution for these cats is simple, says Marra: Bring them indoors. The Humane Society of the United States agrees.        

 So far, so good. Now comes the real problem: unowned cats, which include strays and ferals. Born in the wild or abandoned, feral cats spend almost no time with humans; they’re basically wild animals. Stray cats, by contrast, often have a working relationship with humans. They might live in managed communities, where a human caretaker regular feeds and watches over them—“subsidizing” them, in Marra’s words—meaning their numbers can soar to rates they wouldn’t be able to otherwise. Whether stray or feral, these cats kill on average three times as many animals as owned cats, according to Marra.        

No one knows exactly how many stray and feral cats stalk the U.S. They are, by nature, elusive and transient. In a 2012 study, Marra used an estimate of 30 to 80 million; the Humane Society estimates a more conservative 30 to 40 million. Adithya Sambamurthy from the Center for Investigative Reporting’s The Reveal recently reported that unowned cats may rival the number of pet cats, placing them at about 80 million. That means, for every lap cat hunkering over his dish of Fancy Feast, there is another one prowling around for his dinner—like an evil twin, or a particle of antimatter.        

For these cats, there is no easy solution. This is where Marra’s unorthodox plan comes into play. As he writes: 

In high-priority areas there must be zero tolerance for free-ranging cats. If the animals are trapped, they must be removed from the area and not returned. If homes cannot be found for the animals and no sanctuaries or shelters are available, there is no choice but to euthanize them. If the animals cannot be trapped, other means must be taken to remove them from the landscape—be it the use of select poisons or the retention of professional hunters.                

Feral cat advocates and ecologists agree on very little. But one thing they both will say is this: There are too many cats outside. Feral cat advocates say these dense numbers threaten the welfare of cats themselves, which lead miserable lives colored by fights and starvation. Ecologists, meanwhile, worry about those cats’ victims—as well whether the cats might be spreading disease to humans and other animals.        

Management of these overabundant felines is where the two disagree. For many animal welfare advocates, the solution is TNR, or Trap-Neuter-Return. TNR is just what it sounds like: a policy that involves trapping stray and feral cats, sterilizing them and returning them to the urban wilds in the hopes that populations will decrease. In the past decade, TNR has gone mainstream in many cities, helped along by generous funding from pet food companies including Petco and PetSmart. The premise is simple: Cats live out their lives, but don’t reproduce.        

Becky Robinson, president of the advocacy group Alley Cat Allies and a major proponent of TNR, calls the method “effective, humane control.” “This is a benefit directly to the cats,” she told me over the phone. (Two communications staffers from Robinson’s organization were listening in our conversation, to give you an idea of the delicateness of the topic.)        

Some researchers have documented surprising successes with TNR. Dr. Julie Levy of the University of Florida in Gainesville and colleagues conducted one of the first long-term studies on the effectiveness of TNR, publishing their results in the Journal of the American Veterinary Medical Association in 2003. They sought to quantify whether TNR could succeed in a specific population: stray cats colonies on the campus of the University of Central Florida.        

The researchers expressed doubts at the outset, reporting that “virtually no information exists to support the contention that neutering is an effective long-term method for controlling free-roaming cat populations.” Yet in 2016, more than ten years after their study concluded, just five cats remained on campus—and these are so old and sickly they had to be given geriatric care. Even Levy was taken aback by the results. “We keep seeing better success in the field than the models ever predict,” she says. However, much of the decrease can be attributed to the fact that volunteers often end up adopting cats—a phenomenon Levy considers an unofficial part of many TNR programs.        

Despite these kinds of successes, many ecologists say flatly that TNR doesn’t work. The problem is that, for TNR to succeed in large populations, at least 75 percent of cats in a colony must be sterilized. That rarely happens. The trouble is that negligent pet owners continue to abandon pet cats, which then join existing colonies; additionally, non-neutered stray cats can wander in. Like efforts at vaccinating schools against chickenpox, just a few stragglers can undermine an entire TNR program. Any short-term reduction in colony size is therefore quickly reversed, a group of researchers including Levy and ecologist Patrick Foley reported after studying nearly 15,000 stray and feral cats.        

For Marra, TNR is a feel-good solution that is no solution at all—a Band-Aid that has done little to stem the flow of cats. By refusing to look at the reality, he says, we are letting our “misplaced compassion” for cats get the better of our reason. That is why he and some other ecologists call for a more draconian approach: widespread removal of feral and stray cats, including euthanasia.        

The concept isn’t as radical as it sounds. Australia aims to kill two million cats by 2020 using “robots, lasers, [and] poison.” New Zealand, as I’ve reported previously, has long perpetrated mass warfare on possums, stoats and weasels in a bid to save its beloved birds. In America, too, we cull mammals—including gray wolves, which can prey on livestock and pets, and bison, our national mammal, which can spread bacterial infections to cattle. We even kill cats: American shelters put down more than 1.4 million cats a year, according to the American Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Animals.        

That doesn’t mean we’re comfortable with it. “That’s the aspect that is most alarming about the animal welfare groups, is the fact that often the only reasonable solution of getting rid of invasive species is lethal control,” says Stanley Temple, a wildlife ecologist who argued for the necessity of eradicating invasive species in a 1990 essay The Nasty Necessity. “And that is the single thing that they are so vehemently opposed to. Their hang-up, if you will, on death.” 

Given the unpopularity of eradication programs in the U.S., it would seem inadvisable for any researcher to make one part of his platform of action. But this, Marra says, is our only option. Now his challenge is to get others on his side. To do so he will need more than science—he will need to get people to empathize with birds, and to value species and ecosystems over individuals.      

Marra likes to say that birds saved him, which isn't far off. He was raised mainly by his mother, who worked full-time to support him and his three siblings after his father left when he was an infant. As a result, he enjoyed a relatively feral childhood. By the time he was six, he found himself wandering alone in the woods near his house in Norwalk, Connecticut, swimming in lakes, climbing trees and digging in the dirt for star-nosed moles, frogs and salamanders. He loved catching animals of all kinds—“anything wild,” he says now.        

The Westport Nature Center, a half-mile walk down the hill from his house, became a refuge. With its living wild animals and displays of taxidermied ruffed grouse, the center got Marra asking questions about how his surroundings came to be. One day, a naturalist at the center caught a black-capped chickadee in a mist net, and placed it in his hands. He remembers cupping the bird delicately, “looking into its eyes, feeling its feathers, feeling its wildness,” as he recalled at a Smithsonian event. Meeting the bird’s black marble gaze, a switch flipped in his brain.

“It was a remarkable moment that I’ll never forget,” he said at the event. “The aura of the bird almost entered my body. It was really kind of a transformational experience for me.” 

Throughout a tumultuous childhood, birds provided an anchor. “Birds saved me, because they were always this constant thread that I could come back to,” he says. “It was the one stable thing in my life.” When he went to Southern Connecticut State University to study biology, he quickly realized that dusty specimens in libraries held little appeal. “I was less interested in understanding the subtleties between plumages,” he says. “I was much more interested in watching live birds.”

  In 1999, Marra took a job as a wildlife ecologist at Smithsonian's Environmental Research Center to be on the front lines of human encroachment on the natural environment. When West Nile virus began leaving a trail of dead crows, he started looking into bird mortality. In 2011, he published a paper in the Journal of Ornithology that followed the fate of young gray catbirds in the Maryland suburbs. Soon after leaving the nest, 79 percent of birds were killed by predators, primarily cats, which leave the telltale sign of decapitated victims with just the bodies uneaten. (Ironically, this bird gets its name not because it commonly ends up in the jaws of cats, but from its vaguely catlike yowl).        

The following year, Marra got more ambitious: He decided to tally up the national toll that outdoor cats take on wildlife. He and colleagues used mathematical models to analyze data from local cat predation studies going back more than 50 years. When they extrapolated the data to reflect national trends, they were stunned. According to their calculations, outdoor cats killed somewhere in the ballpark of 2.4 billion birds and 12.3 billion small mammals in the U.S. per year—far exceeding any other human-influenced cause of avian death, such as pesticides or collisions with windows.  

When Marra saw the number “2.4 billion,” he knew that the claws were about to come out. He was right. On January 29, 2013, the same day the paper was published in the journal Nature Communications, the New York Times featured a front-page article highlighting his findings entitled “That Cuddly Killer Is Deadlier Than You Think.” The piece became the newspaper's most-emailed article of the week. It garnered more than a thousand comments online, ranging from outraged (“I'm tired of everyone putting down cats and trying to justify their extermination”) to pointed (“It’s the large bipeds who are the problem, not their cats”) to satirical (“Eat more cat!”). 

Marra read them all. Many were personal insults directed squarely at him. Some suggested that he should be predated or euthanized. Marra understands how emotional people can get about cats—he has entered into many a dinner table debate with his 15-year-old daughter, a long-time vegetarian and animal lover, over cat policy—so he tries to take these reactions with a grain of salt. Still, he admits, “it hurts.” When I ask him how he deals with the constant backlash, he laughs. “Good question,” he says. “It’s actually because I believe in what I do. And if I don’t do it—well, I’ve got one life. This is it. This is the now.” 

More bothersome than the personal attacks were the attacks on his research methodology. The most relentless was Peter Wolf, a vocal feral cat advocate who called Marra’s paper “garbage,”“junk science” and “an agenda-driven effort to undermine TNR” on his blog, Vox Felina. Wolf took issue with the levels of uncertainty in Marra’s paper, alleging that the numbers were “wildly inflated,” came from biased sources, and drew upon just just a handful of studies. “When seen in context, these astronomical figures alone raise questions of credibility,” Wolf wrote on his blog. “It doesn’t seem like science to me,” he told me recently.

It was, Marra admits, a wide range. He and his colleagues estimated that “free-ranging domestic cats kill 1.3–4.0 billion birds and 6.3–22.3 billion mammals annually.” The reason for the discrepancy was the woeful lack of data on feral cat populations and their lifestyles. Marra worked with the limited data he had, synthesizing the results from previous studies and augmenting them with predation numbers from Europe, Australia and New Zealand. By including both the lowest and highest possible estimates for cat predation, he thought he was covering all his bases.  

In all the fighting and flying fur, Marra saw an opportunity. By the time his paper was published in Nature Communications, he was already thinking about writing a book. “I knew this had huge potential for creating a lot of controversy,” he says. “But also conversation. To me, it’s really about the conversation and trying to figure out: how do we come to some resolution on this thing?” 

Cats kill; that much is clear. “The science is all pretty bloody obvious,” as Michael Clinchy, a Canadian biologist focusing on predator-prey relationships at the University of Victoria, puts it. But cats also spread disease. Outdoor cats can transmit plague, rabies, feline leukemia and a mysterious parasite known as Toxoplasma gondii. The extinction of the Hawaiian crow, or ʻalalā, in 2002 is thought to have been caused in part by the spread of Toxoplasma via feral cats. “The diseases from cats is what’s going to change this whole equation,” Marra says. 

Cat feces, 1.2 million tons of which are excreted a year, are known to contain Toxoplasma. The single-celled parasite enters the brain and changes the behavior of prey animals like rats, which can show a strange attraction to cat urine. About 10 to 20 percent of Americans also harbor the parasite, which can be absorbed through contact with litter boxes, drinking contaminated water or eating undercooked meat. Once believed to hang out harmlessly in the human brain, some scientists now believe that Toxoplasma may actively change the connections between our neurons—shifting dopamine levels, altering personalities and even triggering diseases like schizophrenia in genetically susceptible individuals.

Marra calls Toxoplasma a contaminant on the order of DDT, the broad-scale chemical pesticide used to control insects and combat infectious disease up until the 1960s. (DDT lingers in the environment for years, where it can threaten human and animal health, as Rachel Carson documented in her book Silent Spring.) In fact, Marra thinks of outdoor cats themselves as a DDT-like contaminant—wreaking widespread, unnatural havoc on their surroundings. The difference, to him, is that DDT has never been known to wipe out a species, while cats have been implicated in at least 33 extinctions thus far. 

The Toxoplasma threat, Marra writes, makes outdoor cats nothing less than a public health issue. He recommends that the federal government take on the task of eradicating cats from the landscape, via the Centers for Disease Control. He imagines taxpayer-supported public education campaigns, billboards about disease dangers and the importance of keeping cats inside, and large-scale eradication programs in vulnerable areas like Hawaii. To Wolf and others, the idea of such a policy is “absurd” and “screams of desperation.” But to Marra, it’s simply a logical conclusion: “We need to minimize the impact humans have,” he says. “Cats are one of the impacts.”

Science might be able to tell us how many animals cats kill per year. But it can’t tell us what that means—nor what we should do about it. It is us who attach moral weight to cats, by projecting our fear and fantasies upon them. Tibbles was “doing only what her instinct told her to do,” Marra writes. We make cats into pets or pests; victims or villains; those who suffer or those who cause suffering.  

At the heart of this debate is a question not of data, but of aesthetics, principles and philosophies. That is: In a world fundamentally shaped by humans, who is to say whether birds and native wildlife have any more right to the landscape than domestic cats do? Should the goal be to rewind the urban landscape back to before the arrival of Europeans—and is that even possible?  

Conservation biologists have always called these kinds of shots themselves. “We’ve made a judgment that biodiversity is good,” says Temple. For Marra, cats represent yet another destructive footprint man has made on the landscape. To rid the country of their presence is therefore to restore some pre-human balance of nature, some lost sense of grace. It is to protect those creatures that cannot save themselves. “It is essential,” he says, “that we save these species.”        

In his closing chapter, Marra warns that Americans may soon awaken to dead birds and “muted birdsong, if any at all.” It’s another nod to Rachel Carson, whose defense of nature helped spark the modern environmental movement. Today we’ve come to recognize Carson as an environmental Cassandra; history has vindicated many of her inconvenient truths. But when Silent Spring first came out, her ideas were met with hostility from other scientists, who deemed her hysterical, alarmist and “probably a Communist.”

For Marra, it is clear that outdoor cats represent the Silent Spring of our time. Not only are cats the single worst threat to birds caused directly by humans, but they are also the easiest problem to fix, as compared to many-leveled threats like climate change. For him, it is obvious what we must do. Yet he is also starting to understand the challenge of making others see the world as he does. “To me, this should be the low-hanging fruit,” he says. “But as it turns out, it might be easier stopping climate change than stopping cats.”

Rachel E. Gross is the Science Editor for Smithsonian Magazine, covering stories behind new discoveries and the debates that shape our understanding of the world. Before coming to Smithsonian, she covered science for Slate, Wired, and The New York Times.

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https://getpocket.com/explore/item/the-moral-cost-of-cats?utm_source=pocket-newtab

[luidilovins]

like I said before the point of what I was writing was 1.) speculative 2.) annoyed with the implication that racism is a genetic trait.

If people don't like the links because they're not gospel sources then okay, give me a better link. Write a persuasive essay that suggests a different theory with more credible sources. I really wouldn't mind because all I did was claim a theory that only has one or two tested and recorded psyche experiments to date.

Even tested experiments aren't necessarily concrete evidence if there's small sample sizes and I GET that with my little pea brain.

Like there was a a comment in there that had a small theory that movement tracking had to do with lie detection AND THAT'S AS VALID A SPECULATION AND IF THERE'S SUPPORTING ARGUMENTS THAT ARE INFORMED, PERSONALIZED EXPERIENCED, CURIOUSLY DISCUSSED, OR MORE WELL STRUCTURED THAN MINE I'D BE WILLING TO LISTEN.

But it's like I tried to state that rabies was a more likely explaination with a couple of articles on ape group behavior to reflect that the idea that being threatnend by humanoid variances being in our genes has deep fabricated racist history that has been fucking recorded and doccumented and everyone and their grandma is popping up saying "wELL aCtUaLly iM gOinG tO nItpIck YoUr PoSt WiThOut aLsO gIvInG it My AlL To ConTribUte wHy My oPiniOn iS diFfErEnt bEcaUse I'm AcTuaLly JuSt RaCist aNd WoUld rAtHer eXcuSe mY bEhaVioR oN tHe HuMaN coNditiOn"

You wanna speculate that the uncanney valley isn't an inherent trait and is in fact a learned behavior. Good go for it. Make a speculative reblog and I'll think about your opinion. You wanna talk about Pre-European racist influence and examples of how it's effects differ? That's fine. Please do. It's not something I'm truly knowlegeable on and even if i was it's not my place to talk about. You wanna talk about culturally nuanced racial agression and opression between non-European non-American cultures? Good. I wanna learn. I really don't know about it.

But don't fucking sit there and bring up other culturral prejudices as a gotcha as a detraction that white people literally designed anti-black and anti-native dehumanization propoganda and presented the idea to world that black people were not in fact human thus were more marketable to enslave for profitable gain.

That shit is NOT in our fucking DNA and its a fairly new fucking concept that many people believe as a fucking fact still. And fuck you very much for deciding that front page links were the problem with my argument and going on your merry way.

I'm legit too tired to write a full essay, but that rabies uncanney valley post is getting on my last fucking nerve.

Nobody's reblogging the second half where i went into further detail and forming the same opinion over and over.

These butthole surfers are climbing up out of their pits talking about how because racism has been around for a really long time that it is just human nature which it fucking isn't.

Mainly because I only talked about the European installation of racism because that's where my comfort in knowledge begins and ends. They think that I'm claiming that White People Invented Racism but like I don't have the energy to explain just HOW MUCH OF A LEARNED BEHAVIOR racism is.

White people just have a good traceable history of racist propoganda I wish I could articulate it but it's gonna have to wait until I don't have a migraine.

[viktorsmihalevs-blog]

Unit 3 Evaluation

“Design today is concerned primarily with commercial and marketing activities but it could operate on a more intellectual level. It could place new technological developments within imaginary but believable everyday situations that would allow us to debate the implications of different technological futures before they happen.”

- Anthony Dunne and Fiona Raby

The start of this unit was the most challenging part. I had the freedom to do whatever I wish and it was necessary to understand myself before I give myself a framework for my study. Over the past year most of my projects were about raising awareness so my first instinct was to design something different, something happy but most importantly learn new and polish already existing skills. I looked into different task outlines like navigation and conversation with an aim to produce a design solution that had nothing to do with world problems. Early research was not as inspiring as I expected and I found it hard to stay motivated. Looking back at my portfolio I realized that if the final outcome for this unit would not be about raising awareness the portfolio would simply look weird and out of balance. This unit was an opportunity to really define my style and since I enjoy designing solutions that can make a positive impact on a negative issue I decided to concentrate on raising awareness.

I wanted to produce an editorial piece so my first experiments were series of different books. This was interesting and I was trying to work as fast as possible but the outcomes were not as satisfying as I wanted. I believe this was because I was raising awareness about a serious issue and personally it felt like creating an editorial piece is not the best option so I was loosing motivation. Research gave me large amount of information and knowledge which helped me to brainstorm about new design solutions. At some point I was even planning to host an actual exhibition. Half of the unit I spent in slight confusion. The research was informative but the experimentation was lacking creativity so I had to step up my game. Even more research and new, complex experimentation gave me new options. I was constantly debating between editorial piece or something else until after a positive feedback about an accidental experiment inspired me to fully concentrate on its development.  

I decided to pitch a concept for an interactive bus stop poster. The final deliverable would be a presentation and video explaining how the concept of my idea would work. This asked me to go out side multiple times and record different bus stops and I spent many hours by different Adobe editing programs. I was constantly learning and the whole process felt professional. Producing and editing the material on the screen depended a lot on the planning in my note book. The whole process was tedious and slight issue could make me loose many hours of work so it was important to plan everything before hand. Overall I am really happy with the idea and the final concept. The execution has room for improvement, the final video might benefit with some informative text but since I also decided to submit my work in Creative Conscience competition my main aim was to produce a satisfying presentation. In the second unit I was struggling with time management and decision making but in this unit I definitely improved these skill. I had to make crucial decision and planned the creative process well enough to meet not just one but two deadlines. Deciding to submit my work in Creative Conscience was massive boost for development process. It made everything more meaningful and exciting. The outcome also inspired me to look more into speculative design and I realised I have developing interest in future scenarios. Most importantly I learnt that with visual communication I can invent new design solutions that hopefully could make the world a little bit better.