#that hurts lxc!

[ohsweetflips]

my jgy thoughts have been expanding and adapting and roiling and toiling etc etc etc and all of it is coming down to me affectionately marveling at this character. he’s cut-throat. he’s cunning. his kindness leaves lasting impressions. his mercy is what predates his demise. he’s one of the few cultivators who helps those in need. he will sacrifice them if it benefits him. he loved. it didn’t last. it killed him. it orchestrated his downfall. he’s a genius. he’s paranoid. he compartmentalizes. he splits the world into who he would sacrifice and who he would not. people he loves and people he would sacrifice are not mutually exclusive. he’s filial to a fault. it was all for his mother. he is a study in assimilating to survive. the results vary. he manipulates the herd mentality to his benefit. it is turned against him. he is killed for the one thing he didn’t do by the one person he wouldn’t sacrifice. it is still somehow better than what the hive-mind cultivation world would have done. i love this tragic kaleidoscope of a character.

[undistortedworld]

Lan Xichen is dead. Jin Guangyao holds his body.

for @crithir for the @xiyaogotcha4gaza !! i really hope you like it!!! :D i got a bit carried away with this one but i couldnt help it, its SUCH a good and crunchy prompt, i live for the angst <333

ID under the cut! (ive not written a video ID before so i apologise if its not great and welcome feedback!)

[video description:

frame 1: JGY holds LXC's limp body in his lap, one hand cradling LXC's head and the other clutching LXC's own hand against his bleeding abdomen. LXC has a vacant expression and JGY looks shocked and horrified, unable to process what he is seeing. There is blood coating JGY's hands, LXC's robes, and pooling out of LXC's mouth and nose. The animation style is wobbly with sketchy hatched shading.

frame 2: The perspective is angled upwards towards JGY's face from behind LXC's head, highlighting JGY's expression. JGY continues to look horrified and blinks as tears stream down his face.

frame 3: The perspective switches to look down on LXC's expression from above JGY's head. His eyes are clouded over, mouth slightly ajar. There is blood staining his forehead ribbon, trailing from his mouth and nose, and splattered on his cheek.

frame 4: The perspective returns to how it was in frame 1. JGY blinks the tears from his eyes and looks distraught, before ducking his head to hide his expression. Lines indicate he is shaking. He clenches LXC's hand tighter for a moment before letting go to grab LXC's opposite shoulder to pull him closer and more securely in his arms so that LXC's head is by his chin. The perspective zooms in as JGY raises his head to show an expression of murderous rage towards the viewer. The screen gets darker and vignettes as it zooms in. JGY's face is dark, the only facial features visible being his eyes in bright contrast. Red lines of light shoot from the corners of his eyes to indicate the power of his rage.]

[roxiusagi]

Sangcheng week Day 2 - Music

Even with all the effort that Nie-zongzhu put into not cultivating properly with the Nie sabers, he still starts suffering from Qi deviations just like his predecessors, due to accumulated heart demons from the past decade. He vehemently refuses to be treated with the song of clarity for the longest time and only finally relents when he is promised to be held through it and kept safe by his beloved.

(this time i went with the live-action flavour because i never tried that before and it was pretty fun change actually haha)

[add1ctedt0you]

'jc is making himself miserable' is endless funny to me because how dare you jc act like a traumatized war veteran in a setting where therapy doesn't exist? How dare you be sad about your entire family's death? In particular when everyday you have to wake up in the same place where you all lived together and where your parents were brutally killed and you brutally tortured?? How dare you still grieve your sweet and beloved sister? How dare you??

[shenjiushandfan]

Sworn brothers family photo time ✨

[jin-zixun]

"it's not real or selfless love if you're expecting something out of it" and the something is not being fucking murdered by the guy you did nice things for.

like yeah sure jgy's love was cheap and manipulative and conditional because he had the audacity to complain about being murdered 😭😭😭 i can't. i just really fucking can't.

"he threw all the nice things he did for lxc back in his face" after lxc stabbed him. to death. he's allowed to have some fucking feelings and yeah it's out of line to stab someone to death who has saved your life and supported you emotionally and financially for years jgy deserves to be able to say he's wrong for that jfc he was fatally stabbed and you're mad he's complaining about that? fuck off with that

[runespoor7]

this is nieyao to me

NMJ: i could fix him

JGY: you don't have to

NMJ: no i'm gonna

[gentlegentian]

I feel like the true cruelty of the lan sect is a really overlooked topic in the mdzs fandom, because when you think about it...

they practically forced madam lan into marriage so she wouldn't be executed because she killed one of her teachers, but gave her no trial or chance to explain why, and once she was married they simply locked her away and that was that. qingheng-jun then locked himself into seclusion once he had a kid and that was that, had no business with the rest of the sect and left xichen and wangji to grow up alone.

not to mention the fact that wangji even being born is suspicious... xichens conception makes sense, as they would've needed a sect heir, but wangji? how would he have been concieved, if madame lan was trapped away and qingheng-jun was in seclusion. either this is a plot hole im looking way too deep into or theres something darker happening there

in any case, the twin jades most likely did not have a good childhood. like at all. their father was completely absent, and once their mother died they were practically parentless. sure lan qiren raised them, but he was also acting as the lan sect leader whilst qingheng-jun was away, so i doubt he held much involvement in their raising other than making sure they stuck to the rules and were fed etc

SPEAKING OF THE RULES. the punishments the kids in the lan sect had to deal with?????? the fact that nhs, wwx and jc were beaten for rule breaking whilst they were staying at the lan sect as pupils just makes me wonder how badly they treat their own lan disciples if thats how they treat special guests from other clans. they were fifteen when that happened, FIFTEEN, so clearly the lan sect has no problem with LITERALLY BEATING children to teach a lesson.

its basically just abuse to keep a system in place, and it makes me wonder just how many times the twin jades suffered like that as kids to be as 'perfect' as they are as adults

the lan are so corrupt in their ways and i hate how we dont fully see that in the story until wangji is whipped for protecting wei ying. the whole situation is so fucking cruel and unnecessary it makes my blood boil whenever i reread/rewatch that part, because yes wangji did wrong by injuring the elders but the only reason he did so was because they were refusing to listen to him and quite literally trying to murder his lover.

i get he committed treason or whatever by fighting the elders but 33 whip lashes all in one go with NO breaks or healing time?? with a magical cultivated punishment whip as well, its genuinely like they were trying to kill him. even if he didnt die from the lashings themselves he could've gotten an infection, or had severe blood loss, or hell they coulve broken his spine with the force of it. it took so long for him to heal from that, and it left him with so many scars both physical and mental. that level of injury would've likely left him with some form of chronic pain or illness as well, and it was just so cruel for a situation that didn't ever need to come to this.

they forced him into seclusion, just like his father, and punished him for defending himself, just like they did his mother. xichen ended up similarly as well, with his seclusion after the events with jgy. the lan elders had seen the horrific end qingheng-jun and madame lan had, and yet did nothing to stop their children from facing the same trauma, even making theirs worse.

the lans praise themselves as a sect that sticks to righteousness and principles, when realistically its just full of hypocrites holding onto power by means of fear and punishment. they say that lwj broke the rules by fighting to save wwx, and yet somehow torturing him was completely within the rules of the clan.

their rules and image are merely a cover up for the downright abuse and silencing of their disciples, and its just so fucked up. i could rant about this for so much longer, but also wanna see what other people think before i delve into some of the other topics i have in mind that relate

[haruhar-u]

I’m Tired Of Always Chasin’, Chasin’ After You

-1117 words

Xiyao modern au, hurt no comfort

AO3 upload

TWS: breakups, overall angst, cursing

A/N: they may be out of character as this is my first time writing for this fandom

*･゜ﾟ･*:.｡..｡.:*･'･*:.｡. .｡.:*･゜ﾟ･**･゜ﾟ･*:.｡..｡.:*･'･

Lan Xichen was always slow to anger. He always had control over his temper. Whenever pissed, he always would remove himself from the situation; making sure to take a breath of fresh air. The only time he remembers actually losing it was at his brother’s husband but those two are happily married now and recently adopted a son. However, his boyfriend, Jin Guangyao, was close to pushing him over. He slept in his office instead of coming back to their shared apartment at night. The actions he took in his plot to climb the ranks at his company hurt everyone Jin Guangyao Yao was close to. His brother, father, mentor, and friends all cut ties with him. The only one who didn’t was Lan Xichen. 

Xichen wanted to give his A-Yao a chance, really he really did. However, the trust that was the glue between the two was weakening to the point where it might as well have fully dissolved into nothing. Was there really nothing between the two left? Xichen didn’t want to believe that. Surely the blossoms of his love for A-Yao were still in full bloom and hadn't withered and expired yet. 

He invited A-Yao out to their favourite cafe. It was where they had their first date and where A-Yao asked him out before that. It was a high tea place with exquisite china cups and teapots. On the platter placed in the middle of the table, there was an assortment of different cakes, macaroons, and other small baked goods. 

Xichen was surprised that this date could even happen. A-Yao was so concerned with his job that they had to reschedule multiple times because he worked too late or took on another project, pushing their date further and further back. Sometimes he even forgot to show up, leaving Xichen at the place alone. They were only able to go out today because Xichen quite literally chased after him to remind him. Xichen had this thought that occasionally popped into his mind. What if A-Yao didn’t give a fuck about their relationship anymore. Xichen knew this was an intrusive thought and tried to push it away. 

“What’s been keeping you busy?” Xichen asked him.

“I’ve received an anonymous letter detailing Qin Su.” A-Yao replied, cutting a piece of cake on his plate.

“A letter? About your assistant?”

“Former assistant, and no, not completely ” A-Yao corrected. Former? He fired her? A-Yao loved his assistant and would always sing praise about her over text, phone, and in person to Xichen. Why would he fire her?

“Not completely?” Xichen asks, confused. 

Complete and utter silence from A-Yao.

“Please answer me.”

“They threatened me. They told me that all my secrets would be released unless I fired A-su.” He muttered, avoiding eye contact with Xichen. “They wanted her fired because they felt I only hired her because of nepotism.” 

Xichen let out a sigh of disappointment. “A-Yao, what if they didn’t even have your secrets? Then, you just hurt your sister for nothing.” 

“Babe, I had no choice! What if they did know? Then what would I have done if they were released?”

“Did you want to fire her?” 

“No! Like I said, I didn't really have a choice. Maybe they were right, maybe it was nepotism.” 

“How could you not have a choice. She was your assistant, a part of your branch at work. Besides, if you felt it was nepotism, why would you hire her in the first place?” Xichen scolded 

“I-I was pressured into it by my father a few years ago.”

Xichen settled down. “I see.” 

“I was just scared this person would just reveal the fact that I got my father and brother fired just last year..” 

“You what?” 

A-Yao looks him dead in the eye, pleadingly his voice shaking. “I-I felt I had to. But, babe, you don’t have to worry. You know I’d never hurt you, right?” 

Xichen snaps at him, standing up and putting his hands down on the table, gaining attention from everyone else around. “You said you loved her. You say you love me, but how do I know that? How do I know you’re not just using me?! I just wish you’d thought things through before I you know, fell in love with you?” Fuck. Xichen can’t take that back. He does admit that he wanted to confront him about that. Not like that, though. He wanted to ask him about his worries, have A-Yao comfort him, and then tell him it’s okay and he won’t have to worry. Xichen fucked that up. That won’t ever happen. Especially considering Meng Yao’s reaction. His eyes widen, he mumbles something that looks somewhat like an apology, rummages through his wallet, leaves money to pay, and then he runs. Xichen felt he should chase after him and say he’s sorry, so he’s not the one who got away. But he can’t. He feels glued to his seat. 

After a while and a very concerned waiter who went by the name Wen Ning from his name tag asking if he’s okay, Xichen decides he’ll go home, apologize to Meng Yao, and maybe they can move past this like nothing happened? He leaves money to pay for his portion of the bill and spends what feels like forever on public transit. 

Once he unlocks the door, His apartment looks more desolate, as if something were missing. The grey colour palette looks more hostile. It reminded him of when he and A-Yao discussed painting the walls and agreed their landlord would have their heads. He walks into their bedroom when he finally notices it:All of A-Yao’s stuff is just gone, as if it were reduced to nothing by ashes. He found a note tied to a bouquet of hyacinths and rue...hyacinths and rue? Xichen wasn’t very well versed in flower language; that’s something he’d have to ask his brother-in-law about. He decided to read the note.

To my dearest Xichen,

I really cherished every moment we spent together. However, I realized I really treated you like shit. As if I didn’t give a fuck about you and as if I was only using you for protection against my father and for your status as a Lan. Towards the end of our relationship, I couldn’t give you what you deserved, and I didn’t communicate well enough with you. I want you to know I really give a fuck about you. I love you, and for that reason, I’m killing our relationship. Despite you telling me you’d die for me at one point, I feel you’re better off without me. I bid you well, my love. 

With regret,

Jin Guangyao

[stiltonbasket]

chaos baby a-yi is trying to score his mom a date with hot lesbian firefighter nmj? a-yi will climb trees! a-yi will get stuck in the jungle gym, hanging by his (now-broken) arm for two hours and need to be excised by the jaws of life. a-yi will ask his mom to have firefighter nmj sign the cast on his arm. a-yi will go to the firefighters' benefit barbeque! a-yi is giving this his best shot and wants his mom to get with the program!!

Worried mother Lan Xichen, tucking Jingyi into bed: No, we can't go to the park again next week. Your arm is still broken!

Four-year-old bao Jingyi, already planning his next accident: But my other arm still works fine!

[mostlikelytofangirl]

I've read fic where JGY was abusive and found it in character. I don't think 'abusive' and 'not abusive' are two separate categories of people. Under the right circumstances, any person or character can exhibit abusive behaviors and, with a long enough time frame and no interventions, their relationship could certainly become abusive.

If the word 'abuse' seems so incompatible with our beloved villains, can we really say we love them as villains if we can't love and acknowledge their capacity for harm?

-Regular Anon

Oh hi there, anon! Nice to see you again :D. Sorry this took so long in getting answered, I've been having a case of Real Life(tm) recently orz.

Anyways, I'm guessing this is maybe apropos of this other ask? In any case, let me just go part by part starting with the last statement bc I actually agree there with you.

If we claim to like a character, there's really no point in ignoring key elements of their personality, right? If we like villains, we like them bc of the fucked up shit they do and how very sexy of them it was, not in spite of. That's why even when I can indulge myself in the occasional fic with a softer canon WRH (bc food be scarce and every treat is appreciated :'))), I don't fully subscribe to that bc that's just not how he is. Even in AUs there just has to be some of his og assholery or at least make the changes make sense.

But here's where my first caveat comes, and it's something I mentioned in my other reply too. The characters' circumstances.

Now, idk what kind of fic you read, and at the end of the day, if it works for you, that's totally cool! I just would have to assume that JGY's life still had some level of shittery to it, or he was going through someting bc really, this is the character that saved a perfect stranger in the middle of the war without any ulterior motive, nothing to offer, and risking his own safety just bc it was the right thing to do.

The entire point of MY/JGY is that he was "corrupted" by a society that left him with only two options: accept your fate as a bottom feeder, or cheat the system in whatever way you can bc you are always going to be inherently disadvantaged. And here's my second caveat:

JGY doesn't read like a villain to me. An antagonist, maybe, but an actual force of evil in complete oposition to the core values of the heroes and actively trying to hurt/stop them? Not really.

So it's not only that, but also the fact that he's a nurturing person at his core that lead me to disagree with the notion that he would be purposedly abusive towards another person unless there's very pressing circumstances that would make it so that his own well-being actually depends on somehow damaging this other individual.

Sorry, but I just don't see it working in any other way.

That being said, yes, you are right, interpersonal relationships are much more complicated than just abusers and victims (despite what some corners of tiktok and twt might say lol). As I also said in that other ask, at some point in our lives, we are all going to be the assholes and even the villains in someone else's story; we are going to hurt those close to use and we are going to make mistakes bc we are humans. But there's a difference between toxic behavior and being a toxic person. So while being a dick bc you had a bad day or bc there's no good communication going on can totally happen to everyone, that's not the same as intentionally hurting and manipulating someone in a systemic fashion fully designed to keep them trapped with you.

THAT is something ingrained in the person at hand, and while there's an entire conversation to be had about nature vs nurture, in JGY's particular case there has been no examples whatsoever in canon to even suggest that that's the direction his character skews towards. On the contrary, he has sacrificed his own desires and needs for those he cares about: being a model husband to QS and never taking a concubine, helping rebuilt Cloud Recesses and creating the watchtowers even if it was unpopular, going to NHS' aid whenever he called despite it being more work for him, never hurting Madam Jin in spite of how she did hurt him, etc. By the end even, pushing LXC away when the man had clearly accepted death with him.

Again, idk the details of the fic you are refering to, for all I know, it's an entire exploration of JGY spiralling down an even darker and more desperate place than in canon, and him becoming abusive towards someone bc, idk, that's the only way in which he can feel in power when his entire life depends on others is the whole point of the thing. And that's perfectly valid too!! What's fiction for if not to explore and go beyond??

I just felt like I should clarify that, while I agree on principle with the villain statement, I don't think it applies to JGY unless there are specific factors playing along, and if those are not met, I personally wouldn't find an abusive!JGY portrayal accurate or in-character.

But once again, that's just my position and I have my preferences and my biases like any other person.

[labyrynth]

let’s be real for a sec: if rusong were still alive, nhs wouldn’t have hesitated in killing him

[thepurplewombat]

It occurs to me that part of the reason why people in fandom react so badly to JGY killing NMJ is misogyny.

Because like, he poisons him. And poison is a woman's weapon because women are, or were, often without any other weapons.

But actually it also just occurred to me that JGY is cast throughout his past in a very traditionally feminine type of way? Like, not explicitly but if you look at the way that he is dependent on the powerful men around him - JGS, NMJ, WRH - to give him status and some ability to affect his fate within the limits of what they allow...that's a feminine role! That is the role of a woman in a patriarchal society - dependent, with her reputation constantly on the edge of ruin. And being physically weaker and not as good at cultivation as the people around him also plays into that because he doesn't have the same kind of options another man might have in a similar situation - he's not in a position to go and make his fortune because he doesn't have the kind of skills or strength he'd need. Like, if WWX got sick of the Jiangs, he could absolutely go and make a good living as a rogue cultivator, but JGY? He can't do that - his options are either give up on cultivation altogether, or gain power in whatever way he can. In his case, in a way that is most often used by women in this kind of setup - ie, becoming important to important men.

And that's always been painted as such a negative thing (because the patriarchy! And because women wanting agency over their lives, livelihoods, and bodies is a Sign of the End Times!) that in part, JGY would already be subconsciously tainted in fandom's eyes. Even if he never killed NMJ. Even if he never killed anyone at all, he'd still be sus because he's a: following a traditionally feminine route to power which b: has traditionally been disdained (at some point I will talk about how 'gold digger' is an insult when for large parts of human history a woman's only path to financial security did in fact lie in marrying well).

And it's also interesting just how much of JGY's story is about sex when as far as we know the man had sex exactly once. And that's a feminine thing too! Like, he's tainted by his mother's profession and his father's reputation in a way that his father never is. He ends up married to his sister, which is somehow painted as his fault even though JGS is clearly at fault, he's harassed by his brother...the way JGY's life is affected by sex he isn't even having, by the rumors of it and his origins, that's a very feminine situation to be in, you know?

(at this point I want to take a moment to clarify that when I say feminine I'm not calling him a woman, I'm saying he occupies a role in the story that is traditionally assigned to women, and lives a life more like that of a woman in a patriarchal society than a man)

But anyway, back to NMJ and his death. So we have a big strong man lashing out physically against someone weaker than them, and eventually the big strong man dies and it turns out it was poison. And gasp! It's horrible! It's horrible in a way that NMJ swinging his sword around and threatening JGY's life doesn't seem to be for a lot of people.

But why is it that JGY's poisoning of NMJ is regarded so much more negatively than NMJ's repeated attempts to kill him? Is it just because he succeeded? Or is it maybe because poison is a woman's weapon? It's sneaky and underhanded and not 'honorable' but like, what were his other options? Challenge him to a duel?

Anyway I think I had a point but then I got distracted, but here's some closing words.

Throughout his life, JGY is put into situations that are traditionally inflicted on women, dependent on powerful men for his survival, and uses traditionally feminine means to ensure his survival when the powerful men he's beholden to turn on him. Maybe we should take a good long look at why his actions are viewed as worse than what anyone else in the story does.

[tvxcue]

canon compliant xiyao is very brain buzzy for me bc it's such a specific kind of fucked up for both of them that has to require some really inventive mental gymnastics but also that they wouldn't really be able to think abt for it to happen. like the infidelity on jgy's part has the potential to send him into a spiral but also it's different, it has to be different. and jgy playing his father's role in this dynamic and how that implicates him further in everything into his father's schemes while he was alive and godddd is he really his father's son.........literally the cruelty of it, that he become his father through all his worst qualities. that jgy fulfill what his mother wanted by re-enacting what damned her and him. betraying qin su but telling himself it's different, telling himself it's not like that, telling himself nothing at all because he can't confront it.

[jin-zixun]

I'm sorry but if you, as my friend, introduce me to one of your other friends and then your other friend tries to kill me and ends up killed by me, to avoid me being killed by them... I have not wronged you. If anything you have wronged me by introducing me to someone who tried to kill me.

Especially if you insisted it was a misunderstanding after having to stop them twice and then continued to push for reconciliation, between the two of us in private no less, without even acknowledging the possibility of a third time happening while your other friend is literally screaming about how they will definitely be attempting to do it a third time. Please don't be coming to me years later like "why didn't you say something I could've helped" because like. Seriously? Are you serious?

[add1ctedt0you]

Imo, the thing about novel lwj is that he's literally written to be wwx' perfect half. That's his whole character. We don't have him morning his brother as others; we don't have him struggling with class power as others; we don't have him searching revenge for what he lost; we don't have him struggling with the knowledge that someone he dearly loves has killed someone else he also dearly loves. His function is loving and protecting wwx, being there without much past or problems for him. And that's what he does! He puts himself between wwx and every danger! It to be a 13 years old kid, a sect leader, a dog, his 33 grandpas, his own brother, he will protect wei ying.