#that grammar

[mostly-funnytwittertweets]

[stafsar]

my muse and I

[sabertoothwalrus]

get him a ouppy!!!!!

[stingrayextraordinaire]

Another year, another group of my delightful ninth graders trying to spell the word "tragedy" for their Romeo and Juliet assignment.

Last year's collection

[shovson]

sports is really like is this 16 year old we abducted from his schooling the next coming of christ

[littlemizzlinguistics]

Studying linguistics is actually so wonderful because when you explain youth slang to older professors, instead of complaining about how "your generation can't speak right/ you're butchering the language" they light up and go “really? That’s so wonderful! What an innovative construction! Isn't language wonderful?"

[prokopetz]

The worst thing about formal English is that it offers these wonderful suffixes, then only lets you use them in prescribed circumstances. I should be able to describe things as meatful or leftly or falsewise without departing from the formal register if I darn well please.

[rwby-encrusted-blog]

Being neurodivergent is just having a Demicolon attached to every single sentence that comes out of your mouth.

For those who don't know what a Demicolon is:

[fox-and-the-hound]

What if Rainbow Dash and Fluttershy swapped cutie-marks, but their personalities stayed the same?

[smallidarityfan]

bro let the thoughts win

[squareofshape]

i don't care how neat a program is or how much it might improve my life. if it sneaks its way into my computer on top of a regular software update like some kind of fucking digital deer tick, it's a delete on sight. kill kill kill. nobody but ME decides what programs get installed on MY computer. fuck all the way off

[mostly-funnytwittertweets]

[the-californicationist]

i cant stop thinking about laying your head on jonathan price's furry belly after he's made you come so hard that you almost passed out, feeling him breathe in long, heady drags of his cigar, too cock-drunk to nag him about smoking in bed. and how the sheets would just barely be covering his half-hard prick, girthy and fat and soaked in both of your sticky fluids, smelling like sex and leaking all over his skin. and how he would know that you were staring at it, and he'd peel back the sheets just a little bit, letting his drooling head peek out from underneath, purposefully pulsing it right under your nose, teasing you with it, trying to get you to lick him clean. and maybe his free hand starts petting your hair, moving it out of your face, running his huge palm over your forehead just so sweetly and innocently. and maybe you lean forward a bit because, you know, it's right there, and he's being so careful with you. and maybe you barely plant a soft kiss on his tip, still wet and sensitive and swollen, and all of his salty come rubs off onto your lips like gloss, making them slip and slide as you suckle as gently as you can across his cockhead. and the sound that he makes when you finally take him into your mouth is just a perfect, gravelly purr.

[wolfythewitch]

I know how people's interpretation of Odysseus and Athena's relationship is somewhat toxic but parental, but I like to think of him as her weird pet

[vivianthepigeon]

Tim: “I need to tell you something”

Bruce: “What did you do??”

Tim: “when Alfred was doing our taxes he noticed a missing check”

Bruce: “what did you do???”

Tim: “Before I answer do you trust me enough to understand that it was for a good reason and just leave it at that?”

Bruce: “What. Did. You. Do.”

Tim: “it’s all Jason’s fault! He is a BAD person, I’ve been telling you for years!”

—————

Bruce to Jason: “WHAT DID YOU DO?”

Jason: “okay now before I answer that-“

Bruce: “just tell me whatcha did”

Jason: “I got a DUI”

Bruce: “Jason!”

Jason: “it’s not as bad as it sounds”

Bruce: “How is driving drunk not bad???”

Jason: “I wasn’t exactly driving”

Bruce: “I don’t follow.”

Jason: “I was at the bar with Damian and I had a few”

Bruce: “DAMIAN?!”

—————

Damian: “With God as my witness I’ve never been to that bar in my life.”

Jason: “He knows.”

Damian: “Oh I’ve been there a bunch”

[rodolfoparras]

Thinking about the most homophobic misogynistic dude bro talking shit, maybe it’s in the lock room with the rest of his friends, making a whole spectacle out of the two dudes he saw kissing or holding hands

Cw: forced feminization, 18+, top male reader, dom male reader

But you notice the way he shifts from one leg to another, eyes wandering over to your own almost as if fearing you’ll say something you shouldn’t -like how he’d showed up to your dorm last night, sober for once and with his hard on showing through his sweatpants, moments before you had him bouncing on your cock.

Despite having been the one to initiate things, he’d been reluctant to let you know he was enjoying it, with his teeth digging into his bottom lip to the point where blood was trickling down his throat, desperately trying to suppress any sort of noise from escaping his mouth. Hell he refused to move his hips on his own even though he’d been the one to tell you to hurry the fuck up and fuck his pretty little hole (five words you had coaxed forced out of the other man) You had to fuck him back onto your cock, nails digging into the plush skin and working him up and down your dick.

Not that you minded much especially not when he’d ever so often let out wails and whines and you could feel his walls clenching down on your cock and you didn’t waste a second asking if his pretty pussy likes that or if the pretty princess is feeling good. He’d only respond by telling you to shut the fuck up, even spat in your face once but hell that didn’t stop him from riding your dick till he finally reached his orgasm.