#that game started out so differently from how it ended

[aliceinborderlandsquidgame]

Kitten | The Salesman x Fem!Reader

Summary: Something about you catchs his eyes. Now he wants you all for himself.

Warnings: Obsess!Salesman - Canon violence - Sugesstive - Manipulation - Reader loves cats - Maybe OOC - Kind of pet play - E/C = eye color - Reader gets called Kitten -

Another morning, another day ahead, names to meet and recruit, a speech that was deep in his mind.

His movements were calculated, robotic, his smile a fake one, to hide the disgust he felt towards the peopel he had to met.

The last hour, the last train and last name. Your name. The Salesman did his usual thing while waiting for you to appear, get himself a coffee from a cheap machine and let his mind wonder.

Even if he had read your file in order to have the upper hand in the exchange, he was curious to see how you truly were, how would you react to his approach, what would you say or do once he told you about the game.

Maybe the work of the day was getting him, his eyes did let (only for the observant ones) that he was tired to not degree.

One more, one more worm and I can go home.

The train came, lots of faces walked pass him, he only wanted to find yours and put an end to his day.

Finally He saw you, you were looking at your phone, smiling? Well he guessed even someone in your situation could smile.

Maybe you got a lover back home.

He saw how you took a seat, most likely to rest after a long day at your underpaid work, that did not cover any of the debts you had. Yet you did not look discouraged or sad, you were rather animated by what your body language gave out.

Feets moving side to side like a song was playing only for you. That smile and a spark in your eyes...

How dumb yet cute.

Still, he needed to end the day and your name was the last one. So there he went, moving with confidence till he took a seat besides you, his trusted briefcase close.

"Miss.." He tried to get your attention but nothing, you were too deep in your phone writing something. He dared to take a look.

What in-

Cats. Multiple pictures of cats. Different colors, shapes and ages.

It was not the most strange thing he had seen from someones phone but still...

A new photo came in, it was a cat, rather slim with one leg missing but it seemed full of life.

"Im glad you are fine" He hear your whisper thanks to the sitation now out of peopel and that even if you whispered it was rather loud. Most likely you had no sense of self preservation or did check your surroundings since he was able to basically see your phone screen and your messages for...four minutes?

Yes, defently too much for the little patience he had, he wanted to end his day now.

"Excusme Miss" He tried again this time louder and it did finally caught your attention.

You turned to him, too lost checking your cats and how they were doing so far. You never noticed the man besides you. He was tall, black hair and wearing a suit. You could tell it was a rather expensive one, at his feets was a briefcase.

Ah Salesman, he must sells life saves or something.

"Sorry Sir, im in no position to buy anything" You said looking at his dark eyes and bowing then you went back to check your phone.

Well someone ignoring him was not a first.

"Miss, im not here to sell you anything" He started getting your attention back with a rather funny and confused look on your face. "Im here to ask you to play a game with me"

"...A game?" You asked not really beliving your ears. What man would ask a stranger to play a game with them at 11 p.m. in a subway station?

Was this a scam ? A trap maybe ?

Ah, the confusion, he was used to get that too and could only give you a polite fake smile back.

"Yes a game, a game of ddakji" He clarifited pulling from his suit pocket two papper pieces, one blue and other red. "If you manage to win I will give you ₩100.000" He recite just as he always did.

Your eyes opened a bit after that information, while it would not help you that much it would be free money...you could get a warm dinner, something that your current situation did not let you do.

But, there was not a thing as simple as free money, right ? There must be a catch.

"And what would happen if I lose?" You asked him, the hesitation in your voice was clear for The Salesman who just smiled again.

"If you lose, you pay me back ₩100,00. But I doubt you will lose in a childs game" He added trying to incite you to engage in the game.

He studied your face, you were thinking about it, temped by it. Even if the money was not enough, the chance was all it needed to start a chain of thoughts in your mind and finally accept.

And while you were indeed thinking a ring from your phone took your attention away, a new message a new cat pic.

Right, I cant do this. You thought.

"Sorry Sir I must refuse" You started giving him a bow "Even if my chances of winning were high, Im not in position to give you ₩100,000 if I lose. It would not be fair to you" You smiled at him thinking all of this was ending.

He blinked a bit taken back, not because you refused, he had deal with that before, but what you said.

Fair.

The world was not fair. The information in your file let that clear, it was obvious that you knew it.

Then why not take advantage of this? Even If he was just giving you the illusion of money, why not try ? And more, why be worried over whats fair ?

"May I ask why you cant play with me?" He finally said, pulling the pappers back inside his suit pocket. "Its not a big amount of money and I would not make fun of you if you lose"

He was trying for you to feel safe, maybe you were nervous he would judge you ? He knew he could be quiet intimidating

"Oh! Well its rather...embarrassing" You responded, nervously biting your lower lip then looking at the ground.

The Salesman's eyes lingered over your lips, the way you just bite them. Maybe he was getting tired but something from that action  just called him, made his body react.

"It cant be that bad" He tried again, trying to sound gentle

"Well, im in debt because my ex-boyfriend ran away with the money for the Cat Shelter we had together, took away all my savings and I ended in debt cause of it" Your tone did let him know you were angry, sad, frustrated and ashamed.

Well, he did know. But hearing out loud did make it sound funnier he could not lie to himself.

But seeing your face now, that sad look and how you had looked so happy earlier at the cat pics (probably some cats you managed to save and find a home before all things went wrong). It made him feel bad for you, something he never felt towards anyone in his line of work.

"Mhm so your ex-boyfriend ran away and then you kept the shelter by yourself?"

He cant lie, it was a cute reason.

But stupid no less.

"I did, we had too many cats and all of them were sick. They needed someone, I could not ignore them" You tried to explain, a sad smile now on your face as you remember the old promises and memories.

And look where that took you.

"I dont hope that you get it, most peopel laughts when I tell them. Even the load sharks had got a good one" You said pulling out your phone and looking at something while the Salesman let his mind wonder.

You were right. He did not get it. It was something he would never do, an act so compassionate towards a creature...it was not in his nature.

"Look, this is Fat Luigi" He hear you said as you showed him your phone with the image of a big fluffy black cat. "When we first got him he was underwheight, most vets told us he would not make it. It was hard, I passed many nights awake taking care of him, and spent lots of money on him. But now seeing him healthy and happy, it just makes it worth it"

"But are you happy right now? Arent you afraid of your debts?" He asked, curious to know how your brain was working under the stress you most likely had.

"Happy...., well I cant say I love my life right now, I work long hours and the job its bad, I have load sharks on my back and the place where the shelter is will most likely be destroyed since I cant pay..."

He nodded listening to you.

"But im not sad. Yes the situation sucks but when i see the cats i managed to help...honestly even if it sounds crazy, I would do it again" You ended giving him a tired yet honest smile. One that made his heart beat a bit faster.

For a few moments he did not say a thing, his mind wondering, he was not sure what, something about you made him feel slighty different.

Maybe it was your wish to help ? Even when you had passed and suffered ? How you still wanted to play fair ?

You two were different in many ways.

"You would?" He asked seeing you nodd without thinking "And tell me, do I look like a cat person ? Would you get me one if you still had your shelter ?" He continued now trying to entertain himself.

You defenetly were not made for the games.

"Well, you do give the energy of a cat person" By the look on his face he was amused "I mean, you seem like you pass many hours outside your home, cats do need their humans but they can work fine alone for a few hours, you would need to pet them for a bit once you get back"

"Oh I see, and what more?" He leaned in closer, his elbow resting on his knee, one hand holding his face as he turned himself to you invading your personal space.

"You seem like someone who will prefer company thats not always over them demanding attention and cats often give you that, well depends on the cat" You explained blushing at his proximity.

"Then, dont you think it would be better for me to get a kitten?"

"They can be handfull-"

"Mhm, I would need a submissive one" He said leaning even closer, you could now see his dark eyes and smell his cologne. "One that will wait for me at home and will...please me when I want it and how I want it"

His hand went towards your face slowly touching your cheeck with his knuckles, it made you blush even more and be more aware of him. Something was telling you that this was dangerous, this man who had approach you, and yet you could not get yourself to move.

"Maybe a kitten with (E/C), a bit dumb, stupid, has no sense of self preservation, needs help to do anything. But" He paused his eyes studying your face "But its also cute, on its way"

You did not respond. Mouth dry, your mind worked around his cryptid words. Was him...insinuating something?

"How big its your debt?" He asked keeping the small distance.

"Too big" you responded your voice letting out how nervous you were. It was a miracle you managed to get these words out.

He smirked, he knew the exact number and also, he loved knowing he was the one causing you to feel nervous, maybe you were scared?

The idea that he could be scaring you excited him.

"Tell you what, I will pay your debt" He saw the suprise in your face and disbelief  was impossible to hide "But, you must pay me back" He added moving his hand, his thumb now over your lower lip. "You can pay me with your body, I said I should get a kitten right? I believe you are perfect for that position. All you will have to do.." He trailed off forcing his thumb inside your mouth "Its obey me, when I tell you to do something I expect you to obey. If you dont behave, well lets say I can be very creative with my punishments"

He could see the terror in your eyes but also the combination of hope and arousment.

Sick cute thing, just what he needed

"Mhm, lets give it a try shall we? Suck my thumb like a good kitten, I want to see how well you can obey"

Timidly under his dark stare and big pupils your tongue touched his thumb, a shiver went down his spine as he felt it. Your wet tongue licking his finger trying to give it as much attention as you could.

The Salesman moved it around your tongue, almost groaning when he saw you close your eyes and use one hand to take his arm, like you were grounding yourself. He felt a bulge starting to form and couldn't wait to see how wet you were getting.

Abruptly he took off his finger from your mouth taking your neck and kissing you, it was demanding and not loving. He sucked on your lower lip till you moaned and he used this chance to push his tongue into you, caressing yours and sucking it. Needing to hear you moan one more time for him.

What came first were the sounds of steps, The Salesman separated, breathing hard, just like you. Your face was red and eyes wide open and also full with lust. He moved his hair giving you a twisted smile getting up and taking your hand.

"W-wait were are we going?" You asked at him confused by all of the exchange, "Will you really pay my debt?"

"Oh I will my kitten, you will have your loved shelter back and will be able to rescue all the dam cats in Seoul" He said opening the bathroom of the sitation checking that it was empy.

"But first, I need you to take care of something" He said pointing at the bulge between his legs.

He did not miss how you licked your lips.

"Dont worry, I will get you a collar later, now. Get on your knees and show me just how well you can suck, kitten"

[dnpbeats]

Dan and Phil 2024 Upload Stats!!

as the year has ended I thought I would share some of the upload stats from dan and phil this year! here is the spreadsheet if you want to see everything for yourself :3 I also have the stats from the year but only before TIT started, so let me know if you want a post about how upload frequency/times/etc changed after TIT started (nothing changed too dramatically though).

for all screenshots: green = AP and DAPG together (as if they were "one" channel), blue = AP, purple = DAPG

accessibility note: in the alt text of each photo, I have put the spreadsheet tab and cell range. I have turned on accessibility on the spreadsheet, so if you use the link above and go to that cell range, it will (hopefully!) read out all the stats!

General Stats:

There were 78 total regular uploads this year (regular = excluding live streams and trailers), with 18 of those uploads being on AP and 60 of those being on DAPG. The month with the most uploads was February (11) and the one with the least was November (2).

The average time between uploads across the channels together was 4.4 days. The maximum time between uploads was 16 days (Aug 31-Sep 16) and the minimum time was 1 day (Aug 30-Aug 31, ironically enough).

Dan was in 8/18 (44.4%) of AmazingPhil uploads. Despite the joking of DAPG not being a gaming channel anymore, only 30% of the videos uploaded to DAPG were non-games.

Date/Time Stats:

The most common day of the week for uploads was Sunday, with 19 uploads. The least common was Saturday, with only one upload. (That Saturday upload is the Aug 31 one, I don't know why it's featured in so many outlier stats/extremes lmao!)

On average, Tuesdays had the latest average upload time at 9:29pm (UK time) and Thursdays had the earliest at 7:21pm. See the full spreadsheet for these same stats broken out by individual channels!

Sponsor Stats:

There were 18 different sponsors this year, with 9 (50%) of those being single-video sponsors. The sponsor featured the most was Dragon City with 12 videos. There were 15 videos without a sponsor, meaning there were more videos with no sponsor than there were videos sponsored by a single sponsor.

80.8% of videos overall had sponsors. 100% of AP videos were sponsored, whereas 75% of DAPG videos were sponsored.

Editors:

Dan and Phil had a hand in editing 89.7% of the videos, but edited only 4 (5.1%) fully by themselves. They have been involved in the editing of every video since February 29. They have had 3 outsourced editors this year. SuperSeizer was the most common one, with her having edited or helped edit 38 (51.4%) of the videos this year. The 4 videos edited by d&p alone have all been on DAPG.

Runtimes:

The average runtime for videos overall was 20m50s excluding outliers (AKA Poppy Playtime Chapter 3). Including outliers, it is slightly higher at 22m20s. The shortest runtime overall was 9m30s (AP video) and the longest was 2h17m20s (DAPG video [Poppy Playtime]).

If we exclude a couple of sponsors that were only featured in one/two videos (AFK Journey and EA), the videos with no sponsors were on average the longest videos at 26m31s (this is also excluding Poppy Playtime btw!). The shortest videos on average were those sponsored by Relatable at 15m49s.

Series:

The series with the most uploads was the Sims, with 11 uploads total averaging 28 days between each upload. The series with the least amount of uploads was Golf With Friends, with only 1 upload this year.

I am realizing if I'm including BitLife and Phan Twitter I should probably also include the TikTok reacts, lol. There were 4 of those and the average upload time btwn them was 94 days. I will update the spreadsheet later!

Visualization of Uploads:

There is a full calendar sheet that shows the days videos were uploaded on, but I also created a visualization of every upload this year. Black squares are days not in this year (Jan 1 was a Monday, Dec 31 was a Tuesday). Imagine this is just like a squished up calendar!

Light purple is an "irregular" DAPG upload (live streams, WAD/TIT ads, etc.). Light gray is a Daniel Howell upload (WAD ad and WAD). Yellow is other uploads (WAD livestream and DAPCrafts upload).

And that's all! There's a ton more data and graphs/charts on the spreadsheet so feel free to take a look. The full calendar page also has the information of what TIT shows were happening each day. There is also specific info for each individual video (upload time in the UK (and where d&p were at the time), who edited each video, who tweeted about the video, etc.). There's also still the interactive part where you can select two videos and it will tell you how long there was between them!

Please let me know if you have any questions or notice any errors! :3

[solarkness]

Okay but 32 is actually really annoying. 30 is just, whatever, it's a clean number that's low, "people aren't going to spam the same person THAT much"-thinking. 32 adds "ooooh binary numbers so we can just use exponents of 2 :D" to it... which has MULTIPLE ISSUES!!!

First off, what if there are NO notifications? Do you still want there to be a 1 because you have no 0 case? No? You wanna use a boolean whether notifs are there at all in general? Congrats you just added another bit in storage as its own variable for *1* state. Which would be an additional 32 states if you made it part of your notification number. Okay, so, you look up how integers work and what numbers represent and do what most programmers would do: You start counting with 0 and end up with a max of 31 notifications, because 0-31 is 32 possible states. Great, first issue fixed.

Second issue! 32 isn't really used a lot as the max number chosen. Why's that? I mean, 16 is popular enough, you basically can't avoid 256 if you start looking, and even 64, just one additional power of 2, is very popular in Minecraft! So what's wrong with 32? Well, it's 2^5, AKA 2*2*2*2*2. That means you need 5 bits (with 2 possible states, 0 or 1, each) to represent it. Seems easy enough. Until you realise that now you're probably claiming a specific byte in storage, which is 8 bits, and are only using 5 of those! 3 are being wasted and sure, you can probably reuse them if you write your program's functions to access and categorise the storage it is using... but that's a lot of work that you can very, very easily fuck up. It's easier to just go "fuck it, we use the whole byte" and go for 256 possible states (or 255 as max number of notifications). 16 is exactly 2^4, so half a byte - At that point, you can get TWO variables out of each claimed byte, and then it's worth to optimise it a bit on the side of the program by telling it to cut the first or last 4 bits when looking for either of the variables hidden in the byte. (Nowadays, this is less likely to be done because storage is cheap and abundant. Games used to perform miracles on fractions of the storage because they had to in order to exist; A LOT of storage was reused for multiple different variables at different times, which is why so many weird skip glitches exist where you for example instantly beat Pokemon Blue. Using the same storage for multiple different variables of different types is pretty much illegal nowadays, as the high-level languages do their best to keep you from shooting yourself in the foot with needless optimising of plentiful storage.)

So why does Minecraft use 64, which is 2^6, for its stacks? I don't know. If anybody knows, please tell me; But I'm guessing it's just the closest power of 2 to the amount that works best balance wise. More interesting is why it uses 64 instead of 63, since I suggested using 31 instead off 32. Minecraft has a lot of different items that could be in that inventory slot, so it needs an item ID to know what is in there. The case of NO item is handled through that ID - If there is effectively no item ID, it's an empty slot. So the integer that counts the amount doesn't need to account for it not being asked. (This is similar to adding a boolean for no notifs, except it covers more states by covering all possible items, working together with the integer of the amount to determine the actual content of the inventory slot.) So it doesn't need a 0 state, instead it can start with 1. For the notification system, we can only ever have notifications and no, I don't know, alarms or something that are separate but clog up the same system while overriding the notification counter. So the notification system will only deal with notifications, and only ever count how many there are. A separate variable for 0 is pointless when it will always add atleast 2 possible states, when you can just count 1 less and have your 0 state built-in.

Of course, all of this is pointless if you just use regular unsigned 32-bit integers that have a max count of 4,294,967,295 (starting your count with 0). (For the amount of bits, we don't run into the issue of 2^5 with 32, because 32 is a multiple of 8 - The amount of bits in a byte. So we just use 4 bytes for the integer.) At that point, fuck it, just let the notification counter go up to 999 or whatever amount of digits doesn't break your UI.

The fact that Bluesky's "pending notifications" counter only goes up to 30 suggests some very specific things about the usage patterns its designers were expecting.

[elizaleclerc]

it was all by design 🌟

"what if i told you none of it was accidental?"

summary: hunter!reader starts to realize their feelings for xavier, but he's felt this way the whole time...

song: mastermind by taylor swift

word count: 2.1k

author's note: my first l&ds fic everyone cheer! / mostly fluff / workplace romance (i mean this is canon) / im new to this game don't judge / cheeky makeout sesh / he falls first and hard / sarcastic smug xavier (he's a freak) / sweet talk - nothing too spicy / barely proof read oops

It was simple day at the arcade. You and Xavier decided to take the day off from missions and relax with some fun at the colorful arcade machines. You had won more stuffed plushies than you could feasibly carry in your arms, so Xavier held one in his hand delicately, as if he knew how much those little stuffed creatures meant to you.

“Well I better call it a day, I don’t think I can carry any more of these little guys.” You chuckled as your arms began to grow sore, even with the stuffed creatures’ light weight.

“Yeah, you’re supposed to be resting your muscles and instead here you are.” He gestured towards your arms filled with plushes. You laughed to yourself, refusing to admit he was right.

The two of you walked back to your car and you dumped all of the plushes in the backseat. As you looked at all of the adorable creatures, a realization hit you. You had no more room at your desk in the office for all of these plushes to fit.

“What are you thinking about? Or are you just admiring your growing collection?” Xavier spoke from beside me. I turned to look at him for a few moments. The Xavier during missions was so different yet the same as the Xavier outside of work. You had come to know him as a close friend, and even shared some flirtatious moments. Most of the time, you pushed those moments aside and decided to see him only as a coworker. But flirtatious fantasies sometimes danced through your mind.

You envisioned his desk at the office. Completely barren; no pictures, no decorations. A piece of furniture completely devoid of any color or personality. You grabbed one of your plushes. This one was a particularly round tomato plush. “Here,” you started, “this won’t fit on my desk, so you can have it.”

Xavier took the plush in his hand and examined it for a moment, “What am I supposed to do with it?”

You shrugged your shoulders, “I dunno, it’s up to you.”

~

For some unknown reason, after the day at the arcade you spent the entire next day thinking about Xavier. During random moments of the day, memories between the two of you kept flashing back into your mind. You would be folding laundry and suddenly think back to his arms brushing against yours like they did during a mission in the forest. You both had heard and felt fluctuations and were on guard. He held your wrist in a swift movement to keep you close. You snapped out of it and finished folding your clothes.

Another memory flashed while you were cleaning dishes. It was a particularly risky mission, and Xavier’s Evol was dwindling. His life was at risk, but he was still willing to put himself in the face of danger in order to keep you safe. When you tried to resonate with him, at first he hesitated. He wouldn’t dare you spend any of your energy or power on him. But in the end, your decision to resonate saved his life. You both thought you’d end up losing the other that day, and the silent air of the aftermath sat heavy. You held each other close, your heavy breathing mixing together.

After your days off were over, and you thought you had finally gotten over yourself, you walked into the office prepared for whatever mission Jenna was going to send you on. But then, you saw Xavier across the room. He was standing talking to another hunter, and you just about lost your mind. He was standing with his arms crossed, clad in his hunter uniform, his head cocked slightly as he listened to whatever his coworker was jabbering about. God, he looked amazing, you thought. Why were you thinking of him in this way all of the sudden?

You had gone over every small interaction, every side conversation, every slight touch that the two of you had ever shared. Was there really something between the two of you, or had you actually gone mad this time. You walked over to your desk, placing one of your newest plushes on the shelf to complete your set.

Your eyes glanced over at Xavier’s desk, not expecting anything to have changed. You did a double take when you noticed something new. A small tomato plush sat next to his computer. That wasn’t the only thing either. A square photo was stuck to the hang wall that every worker had.

Trying to be inconspicuous, you squinted at the photo. It was one the two of you had taken before one of your most recent missions. You were both dressed in your uniforms, and he had his arm around your shoulder as you held bunny ears behind his head. He was smiling, and you were sticking your tongue out. It was the only photo the two of you had ever taken together.

Your head was reeling. This couldn’t be real. You were convinced you were trapped in some Protocore induced dream. “Do you like the new decorations?” Your body jolted as Xavier spoke next to you. You turned to see a smug smile on his face, his arms still crossed.

You were too shocked to speak, but finally decided to say something as Xavier waited for an answer. “Yeah, yeah…it’s nice.” Your voice sounded more exasperated than you’d like. Xavier seemed to read you like a book. Did he know the realizations that you were having?

“Are you alright?” He asked with a slight smile. He didn’t actually seem too concerned.

“Yeah- no, yeah, I’m fine.” You stumbled over your words, refusing to make eye contact with him. You saw a slight twitch in his bicep as he adjusted his stance by his desk. Your entire face went hot. “I think Jenna wanted me to look at something in the Archive room, I’ll um…be right back.” You hurried through your excuse to leave the main office.

Your breath had quickened, but you found solace in the empty archive room. Only tech workers were really needed back here to retrieve old files on specific Protocores or important history of Linkon. Thankfully the room was empty, the only sound being your heavy breathing. You sat yourself on one of the empty counters, the space usually used for examining documents. You put your head in your hands, get it together.

You heard the handle of the door slide open, and your heart sank. In walked Xavier, still appearing smug and moving like he rehearsed all of this. “Are you following me now?” You huffed, just needing some time alone to sort through your thoughts.

“Are you done lying to me?” He retorted, moving closer to you, now standing only a few feet away.

“What are you talking about?” You scoffed in a hushed laugh.

“You’re clearly not fine. What’s going on?” He still held that dumb smile on his face, and your brows furrowed.

“Are you actually concerned for me? Because you’re smiling. Do you know you’re smiling right now?” You asked in a rushed tone; you’ve never seen him behave this way.

He let out a deep sigh, his eyes rolling in exasperation. "Do I have to explain everything to you?" He took a step closer, his body now towering over you as you sat perched on the counter. He leaned down, his hands planted firmly on either side of your legs. Your faces were mere inches apart, and the intensity of his gaze sent shivers down your spine. “Do I have to explain why your face flushes when I get close like this?”

Gently, he reaches out and places his warm hand on your knee, caressing it with gentle strokes. With a slow and deliberate movement, he begins to trace a path up your thigh, his fingertips leaving a tingling sensation in their wake. Gradually, his touch becomes more confident and sure, sending waves of desire rippling through your body. “Do I have to explain how your breath quickens when I do this?”

He leans in, his breath warm on your neck as he speaks in a soft whisper only meant for you. You can feel the heat radiating from his lips, and the gentle brush of his words sends shivers down your spine. His breath carries the scent of mint and musk, enveloping you in a cloud of desire. The closeness between you is palpable, and every nerve in your body is electrified by his presence. “Or can you put the pieces together yourself?”

“Xavier…” Is all you can think to say. Your breathing was quickening, and your face was flushed.

He sighed, his lips just barely grazing the start of your jaw, “I’ve waited and waited for you to finally feel what I’ve felt for so long.” You take your hands and slightly push his chest away.

You analyze his face and his brows furrow ever so slightly. “You mean- you’ve felt this way about me all this time and never told me?” You brought one of your hands up to the side of his face, your thumb lightly tracing around his cheek.

“Of course, I wouldn’t be able to live with myself if I knew you didn’t feel the same way- if you would never feel this way…” He starts, and before he can continue, you speak up.

“But now you know…”

A smile tugs at the corner of his lips, “Exactly.” He brings a hand up to your jaw and slowly moves it to the back of your neck. “Can I kiss you now?” Your eyes felt dazed as you gazed down at his lips. He brushed a thumb over the bottom of your lip, waiting. “Please, your eyes are saying yes but I need to hear it from your mouth.”

You nodded, snapping out of the haze you were in. “Yes, yes, please.” As soon as the last word was uttered Xavier brought his lips onto yours. He started slow, his soft lips moving in rhythm with yours. He was still leaning on his hands, but he moved them to wrap around your lower back. You never thought he would feel this good on your lips. You let out a slight whimper, and that sent Xavier spiraling. Like a man starved, he quickened his pace and kissed you as if he’d never get the chance again.

“Wait- we can’t do this here.” You took a moment in between kisses to center yourself and remember you were at work.

“Ugh, I don’t care,” Xavier breathed out and went back to kissing you again. Once his lips found yours for the second time you didn’t care anymore either. You wanted this feeling, this burning desire for him to last forever.

You smiled into the next kiss, “Okay,” You moved your hands into his hair, your fingers tugging on the strands slightly. He moaned lightly into your kiss, causing your back to arch.

You almost missed the door handle opening again, and you immediately pushed Xavier off of you. He stumbled back, partially in shock until he realized why. Andrew walked in, his cheeks flushed with embarrassment from walking in on the two of you. “Um- Jenna is looking for you. The mission assignments are about to be handed out.” He cleared his throat and walked out of the room.

Your own face was flush pink, and once Andrew left the room you put your head in your hands. “Oh my god.”

“Okay, you were right. Maybe we shouldn’t have done that here.” Xavier laughed to himself. You had no choice but to laugh, really.

You hopped off of the counter, your legs feeling weak. You couldn’t even think about going on a mission right now, nonetheless with Xavier. “Well,” You straightened out your uniform, “I guess we should head back.”

“Yeah,” Xavier chuckled to himself, “until next time.”

Your face flushed at his words, because you knew there would be a next time.

[thefallennightmare]

The Ties That Bind Us: Two

*gif created by me. feel free to use, simply give credit.*

•Parings• Noah Sebastian x Soulmate!Reader

•Word Count• 6,766

•Warnings• fluff, language, talks of death/cancer, angst, depression, dark thoughts, soft!Noah, smut that will include unprotected p in v, oral with both male and female receiving, hand jobs, and fingering. Pretty tame smut in this.

•Summary• Growing up, Noah’s grandparents told him the story of why everyone wore a red tie around their wrists and while theirs glowed while his didn’t.

“Yours will glow when you meet your soulmate, Noah.”

When someone moves in next door and catches Noah’s eyes immediately, he sees the red tie around her wrist glowing only to see his remains red. Convinced she’s not his soulmate, Noah tries hard to stay away from her yet small moments between them start to blossom. So much so, he can’t ignore the tie that binds them together

•Authors Note• Fair warning, this one will hurt.

SERIES MASTERLIST

TAG LIST

Song choice for the chapter just incase some of you won't know the lyrics

READER

“Eric?” I called out into the house as I stepped foot inside, two paper grocery bags in each arm. 

A quiet house always worried me because I was never sure what I would walk into. Whenever I went out without Eric, I made sure to constantly check the bind on my wrist to make sure it would still glow. My worst fear was the flow fading back to the pale red when I wasn’t with Eric. I knew it was inevitable especially with his sickness but there was this small sliver of hope inside of me that I clung to every day that we would be fine; Eric would be fine. 

Kicking off my shoes, I walked down the long hallway of our ranch style home towards our bedroom to notice the door was cracked and the soft sounds of the television echoed in the air. 

“Eric?” I spoke again, pushing open the door all of the way to see my husband laying in bed with a white fluff ball on his chest. 

“Ghost,” I sighed with my hands on my hips. “What did I tell you about laying on your dads chest? He can’t breathe with all your fluff on top of him?” 

Eric chuckled, which seemed to take a lot of strength, but he did his best to play it off. “It’s fine. It’s a little pet therapy.”

It had been a few weeks since we moved to Los Angeles and with the stress of the move and Eric’s rigorous chemotherapy, he felt like he needed some sense of comfort. So two days ago, we visited the local shelter and adopted Ghost. A two year old Maine Coon cat that left his fur on every possible surface. I never was a cat person but the moment I saw light return to Eric’s eyes the moment he held Ghost, I knew he needed the cat more than my dislike for them. 

Although, I’d never admit outloud how cute Ghost was. 

“I picked up some stuff for dinner. Are you hungry? I could make some soup,” I asked Eric after I laid in bed next to him. 

He left a weak kiss on my forehead. “I’m alright, my daisy. Don’t have much of an appetite.”

Even with his nickname for me, I frowned when I remembered how this morning's chemo took a lot out of Eric, hence why he’d been laid up in bed all day. While scratching Ghost’s chin, his favorite, I snuggled up closer to Eric and finally paid attention to what he’d been watching. 

“Flipping through Twitch channels again?” I couldn’t help but giggle. 

It was one of Eric’s favorite things to do. Watch other people live stream themselves playing video games. He used to do it years ago, before he got sick, and now that he didn’t have the energy to continue it Eric made the time to watch others. 

He nodded while wrapping an arm around me, tattooed fingers grazing up and down my arm. I did my best to cherish these moments because I wasn’t sure if it would end. 

It will end, Y/N. The doctors said-.

Forcing those thoughts away, I let time and silence pass between us as Eric clicked through different twitch channels, him casting it from his phone to the television above the fireplace in our bedroom. But when I saw a somewhat familiar face pop up on screen, I held a hand on Eric’s to stop him from changing it. 

“Wait. Isn’t that our neighbor?” I asked. 

The lines in Eric’s forehead creased as his ember eyes studied the screen for a moment. “Huh, it is. Noah Sebastian. He’s the one that’s in a band.” 

I gazed up at Eric with confusion etched on my brows. “How do you know that?” 

There was a smirk underneath his mustache. “I talk to the neighbors, Y/N.” 

Playfully rolling my eyes, I settled back into the bed so we could watch the live stream of our neighbors. Eric seemed fine to watch as well since Noah was playing one of his favorite games; Super Smash Bros. 

Besides the short conversation with Noah when we first moved in, I never spoke more than a few words to our neighbors. Besides the occasional hi or nice weather today. I wasn’t a very sociable person unlike Eric who always stopped to talk with anyone. Even with his sickness, he always found the time to go outside and talk with the neighbors. 

Noah was playing with someone I hadn’t recognized, only for Eric to tell me that it was one of Noah’s bandmates. 

“Nicholas,” Eric said. “He plays bass in the band. Nick plays the drums. They live in Virginia. The other roommate with the long hair and accent, Jolly, plays guitar.” 

I hummed during this little lesson about our neighbors. “I always wondered where Jolyl was from because of his accent.” 

“Sweden,” Eric informed. “Their band, Bad Omens, is about to release their second album. Which is why we hear music most of the day.” 

“What about the other two roommates? Jesse with the fruit and the other guy?” I asked. 

“Michael. They're in their own separate bands.” 

I nodded once the conversation seized and settled in again, watching the twitch stream. It was a calming vibe, even with Noah’s chaotic game play. When a loud crack sounded, Eric and I both broke out in laughter when Noah and Nicholas freaked out about a candle exploding on a shelf above his bed. 

“Oh shit, it’s on fire!” Noah bellowed while jumping onto his bed. “My whole shelf was on fire, dude!”

“How many people live in this house?” I asked when we watched a group of guys walk into Noah’s bedroom, him explaining what happened with the candle. 

Soft snores filled my ears causing me to glance up at Eric to see he’d fallen asleep, Ghost still on his chest. I left a kiss on this cheek and removed the beanie from his head so he could sleep comfortably. He used to have a head full of hair but since he started chemo, Eric shaved it off and wore the black beanie cap any chance he could. 

Reaching for his phone, I quickly followed Noah’s twitch channel and clicked off the television. 

“Are you hungry, Ghost?” I asked the feline as I rose from the bed, him following behind me with a harsh meow while we let Eric sleep the rest of the night away. 

NOAH

The sounds of the birds in the trees signing their soft songs brought a sense of peace and familiarity as I sat and lounged on one of the chairs in my backyard, browsing through my phone. The autumn winds blew through my hair and I reveled in how it brought a smile to my face. Summer came and went, taking with it the hot California heat and I could not be happier. I spent more time outside rather that in my bedroom because of it. 

Also for the off chance I caught sight of my neighbor. 

It had been almost a month since Y/N moved in. Since both her and Eric moved in. 

Her husband. 

Her soulmate. 

While I chatted with Eric a few times, I rarely spoke with Y/N besides the occasional pleasantries. Even though I found her to be attractive, I continued to tell myself not to let the feelings grow more than that. She was married, her red bind glowed bright along with Eric’s. They were meant for each other, I couldn’t interfere with that. 

It wasn’t what was laid out for my life nor Y/N’s. 

And I had to admit, Eric was a pretty cool guy. He seemed to have heard of not only Bad Omnes, but Chief and Erra as well. He used to be in a band when he was younger but had to step away a couple years ago. 

When they first moved in, we saw Eric outside quite a bit whether it was to work on the yard or write in a journal. Now, almost a month later, I’d seen Eric one or twice. 

Shifting in my seat, I let out a groan of annoyance when I received yet another text from whatever her name was. It didn’t seem to bother her all that much that I couldn’t remember her name because she’d been texting me nearly every day asking if we could meet up. Each and every time I would either come up with an excuse or ignore her. 

Maybe if I sent her a screenshot of her contact name, what’s her face, then she will get the hint. 

Was that mean? Of course. 

Did I care? Not entirely. 

A muttering slew of curses caught my attention and setting my phone down in my lap, I glanced towards my right over the fence line to see Y/N standing in her backyard. She wore a pair of biker shorts that showed off her long legs and an oversized shirt. Her hair was up in a very messy bun on top of her head. The entire outfit gave way that she was about to do some kind of yard work. 

Also the fact she was fighting with the lawn mower. 

“Stupid old piece of shit,” Y/N grumbled while kicking it. “You started fine for Eric two weeks ago. Why won’t you start now?” 

For a moment, I watched her try to start the lawn mower, all while sporting a shit eating grin. I wouldn’t admit it outloud but watching her struggle made my heart flutter. 

“Please just work for me,” she nearly whined while throwing her head back up to the sky. “I need one good thing to happen for me today. Please.” 

A slight frown pulled at my lips when I heard the sadness lace her voice so almost quickly, I rose to my feet and walked over towards the fenceline we shared. 

“Everything alright?” 

Y/N jumped at my voice, a hand over her heart as she peered over at me. The fence wasn’t high at all, coming to my waist so we were able to see over it perfectly fine.��

“Uh,” she hastily tucked a loose strand of hair behind her ear, sitting up straighter. “Yes. Well, no not really. But I don’t want to bother you. I can figure it out on my own.” 

My brow raised as I rested my arms on the top of the fence, leaning my top half over into her yard slightly. 

“Are you sure? I’ve heard you call that lawn mower quite a few choice names in the last few minutes.” 

Y/N’s shoulders fell and eventually she nodded. “The grass is slightly overgrown and I got a letter from the HOA this morning that if I don’t cut it by the end of the day, they’ll charge me fifty bucks a day until it’s cut!” 

I grimaced. “Yeah, they’re quite nasty with things like this. One time, we didn't bring in the garbage can because we were on the road so no one was home. It was out on the curb for three extra days and we got charged $100.” 

“Just a couple of middle aged women who aren’t getting any action from their husbands or their pool boys so they take it out on someone who doesn’t even have a working mower,” Y/N said. 

Both of us broke out in laughter, the mood between us lightening. It was weird how at ease I felt talking with her even though this was the most we've spoken since she moved in a month ago. 

Quickly, I dared a glance down to the pale red bind on my wrist before looking at hers which continued to glow bright. Showcasing her love for Eric. 

Swallowing the lump in my throat, I motioned towards her yard. “Do you usually cut the grass yourself?” 

Something flashed in Y/N’s eyes as she kept something buried deep inside of her. Her bottom lip twitched and the muscle in her jaw jumped but whatever plagued her mind she was quick to mask it with a forced smile. 

“Eric’s busy and back in the midwest we lived in a condo so we always had someone to do our yard work,” Y/N explained. 

I nodded with a hum before pushing off of the fence, taking off my sweater to reveal a tank top underneath. I didn’t miss the way her eyes widened at the sight of my tattoos, her gaze lingering on the one on my neck. 

“Woah,” she muttered under her breath but was fast to change up her suddenly aroused tone. “What are you doing?” 

Tossing my sweater over to the chair I was previously sitting on, I looked back at her with a smile. “I’m going to cut your grass for you.” 

Immediately Y/N shook her head. “No, Noah. I can’t have you do that. Our yard is quite big and the grass is overgrown. It will take you the rest of the afternoon.”

It was true. 

The grass reached her ankles and her yard was a tad bit bigger than ours. But that's all it was, just grass except for a small garden bed In the ground that seemed to grow one kind of flower. 

Daisies. 

“It’ll take me less than a few hours. We have one of those nice riding mowers. I just put on my headphones and make it go by faster,” I said. 

The way she bit her bottom lip in ponder made something twinge inside of me. She looked absolutely beautiful with the sun above her casting her in a golden aura. I marveled as it gave her a halo and as a certain word threatened to spill from my lips, I instead reminded myself that she was married to her soulmate. All I could be to her was her neighbor. Maybe even a friend. 

“Thank you, Noah,” she finally spoke and I could see the weight physically lift from her shoulders. “You don’t know how much this is going to help me. I’ll even pay you, as a thank you.” 

I waved her off. “Don’t even worry about it. All I ask for is an ice cold beer.” 

Now it was her turn to grimace. “Well, you won’t find that here. Eric and I don’t drink.” 

There was something underlying in the way she spoke about Eric but I dare not pry so instead I gave her another wide smile. 

“Lemonade works too.” 

“That I can do,” Y/N returned my smile. 

Two hours and three cups of lemonade later, I was standing in my bedroom freshly showered with a towel hanging low on my waist. I meant it when I said mowing Y/N’s yard was easy especially with our riding mower. She often came out to check on me but mostly stayed inside. As I was cutting the grass on the side of the house, passing their bedroom, I noticed Eric laying in bed. Anger rose inside of me for a moment when I thought he was being lazy, that's why he didn’t want to cut the grass. But when I saw the medication and bows of untouched soup on the table next to the bed, I realized he must have been sick with a cold, that’s why he couldn’t cut the grass. 

It was when I parked the mower back into my garage and I was shutting it behind me did Eric finally walk outside, gripping the posts of his front porch. 

“Thank you, Noah. It means a lot that you’ll help Y/N out when she needs it.” 

I ran a hand through my long locks, working out the knots it gathered from having it tied up in a bun. “Of course. Although, I will admit it was kind of funny watching her struggle and call your piece of shit mower names.” 

Eric laughed a hearty laugh albeit weak before giving me one more nod, heading back inside. 

NOAH

Groaning as I worked out the sore muscles from my earlier gym session, I stepped inside my bedroom after my shower and dropped my towel to step into a pair of briefs then sweats. It was just before six in the evening and I knew I needed to talk with Jolly at some point about the finishing plans for our two week tour we would be leaving on in a few weeks. 

It had been nearly a week since I cut Y/N’s grass and almost every night, we all found ourselves sitting outside for a few hours of the night chatting. Some nights we would hang out in their yard, Eric joining us as well, and other nights Y/N would venture over with a dish of whatever dinner she had cooked that night. Whenever she came by our place alone, we often asked where Eric was and it was always the same answer. 

He’s not feeling all that well. 

Tonight I had plans on streaming on twitch which meant we couldn’t enjoy the autumn nights outside together, which was something I needed. Because the more time I spent with her, the feelings began to grow stronger. Especially with what happened between us moments ago. 

When I returned from the gym, I stepped out of my car with my gym bag slung over my shoulder and only wore my work out shorts. The gym session had been intense and my body still ignited with heat so I decided not to wear a shirt on the drive home. Y/N had returned from a run and stopped at the end of my driveway when she caught sight of my shirtless form. She wore a simple sports bra that seemed to hug her breasts perfectly and tight shorts. The muscles of her stomach glistened with the sweat that lingered and the thought of grazing my tongue over her salty skin passed in my mind briefly. 

We stared at each other for a long moment, both of us not saying anything, as new tensions began to form between us. It was unknown to me so like I’d always done when I was around her, I looked at my bind on the off chance it was glowing. 

It wasn’t. 

So instead of dwelling on the disappointment again, I struck up a conversation with her. Wondering if she wouldn’t mind exchanging numbers because with the entire household leaving on their own respective tours in a few weeks, no one would be home and we were in need of someone to keep an eye on the place. 

Y/N agreed and after we exchanged numbers, she bid me a farewell with a tentative wave over her shoulder. I watched with blazing eyes on her perfect ass as she walked up the steps to her house, shutting the door behind her. 

Now I stood in my bedroom, the window open to let in the chill autumn air as I tried desperately not to text her because deep down, I knew it was a line I shouldn’t cross. 

Why was I so enamored with her? Why couldn’t I think of anyone else but her? 

It should have been easy to forget about Y/N in the way I had been thinking about her, yet here I was wondering what she was doing right at that moment.

A gruff meow pulled me from my thoughts and I snapped my head to the white ball of fluff that seemed to materialize at my feet. 

“What the fuck!” I cursed, nearly jumping onto my bed. 

I would have been more freaked out if I didn’t know who the cat belonged to. I’d seen him hanging out in the window sills next door and one night while we all hung out in Y/N’s back yard, he ventured out to lay in Eric’s lap. We found out that those two were bound at the hip and Y/N even joked that she was the third wheel in the marriage to Eric and his cat. 

“Ghost,” I sighed while picking him up into my arms. “How did you get over here?”

All he did was purr in response so after setting him on my bed, I had no choice but to text Y/N. 

“Was this all part of your master plan?” I teased the cat as he curled up on my pillow while I typed up a message. 

Me: Hey it’s Noah. Missing something? 

Attached to the text was a picture of Ghost curled up on my pillow. 

Y/N: Son of a bitch. I am so sorry, Noah! I don’t know how he keeps getting out. Jesse told me a few days ago he found Ghost sunbathing in your hammock. 

Me: Don’t apologize. We don’t mind his little visits. 

Me: I can bring him back home. I’m sure Eric is missing him. 

As I waited for her to respond, I busied myself with throwing a shirt on and setting up everything I needed for my twitch stream later, all the while Ghost slept soundly on my pillow. 

When my phone buzzed on my desk, I snatched it so fast it nearly slipped through my fingers. 

Y/N: No rush! Eric and I are actually headed out to dinner so we can scoop Ghost up after. If that’s alright? 

Even though my heart dropped at the image of Eric and Y/N going out together, I replied. 

Me: More than alright. Just text me when you’re on your way back and I’ll have him ready for you. 

Her texts seized after that so leaving my phone plugged into the charger on my end table, I was about to head to the kitchen to find something to eat when something through my bedroom window caught my eye. 

Directly across my bedroom window was Y/N’s and I stood frozen with wide eyes as I watched her step into her room with a towel wrapped around her. Her hair was wet, sticking to her face and back as she turned away from me; oblivious that I could see through her window. 

Before, Y/N would have her curtains closed, not allowing me a view inside. But for some reason today she had them pulled wide open. I stood frozen in time as she dropped the towel, showing me the swell of her ass. My cock throbbed in my shorts and as much as I wanted to ease away some of the tension with my palm, I couldn’t move. Time was suspended as I continued to stare at Y/N as she moved about her room naked. Her skin seemed to glimmer even with all of the distance between us and as much as I tried to ignore the way I was beginning to feel for it, it was futile. 

My heart pounded when she was near and far. My cock ached to know what her cunt felt like. My hands were desperate to feel the weight of her tits in them. My mouth craved to taste her own. 

Y/N was perfect in every single way. She was gorgeous as the aura followed her around the bedroom, outlining her with imaginative wings. 

“She’s married, Noah,” I groaned while running a hand over my face, forcing me to turn away from the window. 

With my eyes closed, I didn’t see the way the pale red bind around my wrist flashed gold; only for a moment. 

READER

“In the pounding feet, in the streets below, and the window breaks. And a woman falls, there's something wrong, it's so hard to believe that love will prevail,” my voice sang quietly as I stepped inside the house through the patio door. 

I had a bouquet of fresh daisies from the garden ready to prep and put in a vase, along with the other four spread out through the house. I absolutely loved daisies, them being my favorite flower. It was the bouquet of flowers Eric got me on our first date so they hold a sentimental place in my heart. Even though we didn’t have much of a garden here yet I knew I wanted to grow daisies. 

Once they were settled nicely in the vase, I dragged my tired feet down the hall towards my bedroom. The last few weeks had been so amazing and adventurous, it was beginning to creep up on me. Eric had been feeling great, nearly back to his old self. Well, not completely. The cancer was still spreading through him but the chemo seemed to be slowing the speed in which it spread. I wasn’t sure what exactly changed in Eric or where this surge of energy came from but I didn’t complain.

We started going out and exploring the town we lived in; going to farmers markets, walking along the beach at sunset, going to movies, grabbing dinner at a greasy diner that probably wasn’t healthy for either of us but we didn’t care. We both were happy, more in love than our wedding day. 

While I’d been outside tending the garden, Eric was out picking us up some dinner. I was hesitant to let him drive but he assured me that he was only going down the block to one of our favorite Greek spots. He would only be gone for twenty minutes. 

After I set the daisies on top of my dresser, I went about tidying up the bedroom. Just as I was about to pull the curtains shut, my eye caught sight of Noah across the way in his own bedroom. I could only see half of his bed and desk but with what I could see, he was sitting on the edge of his bed with a guitar in his lap. I couldn't see his face, only his fingers strumming along the strings. Both of our windows were open so I could hear his voice carry over into my bedroom as he sang. 

“If I’m there to catch you when you fall you'll have a friend down in hell after all.” 

Swallowing thickly, I yanked the curtain shut and sat on the chair at my vanity, trying to calm the heat that rose to my cheeks. I wasn’t sure what shifted between us in the last few months since I first moved in but it was nice having him, along with his roommates, as friends. I know Eric appreciated it too. Having a group of people that didn’t know about his cancer so they didn’t give him the usual looks of sympathy. 

Seeing Noah in his bedroom was the first time I’d seen him in weeks since he left for tour. I’d been listening to his band, Bad Omens, and while they weren’t the usual music I listened to, I still found myself transfixed with Noah’s voice. They only had two albums out and I was desperate for more. 

I couldn’t explain it but talking with Noah, I found myself falling deeper for him. Not in a romantic way but with a connection so deep it would be nearly impossible to break the farther along our friendship grew. 

The front door opened and I quickly rose to my feet, skipping down the hall to smile at Eric who not only had a bag of food in one hand but a rather large bouquet of flowers in the other. 

Not just any flowers but daisies. 

I giggled while taking them from him, allowing him to capture my lips in a kiss. “You do know we’re growing daisies outside, right?” 

He shrugged while setting down the food on our large kitchen counter and shrugged off his tan jacket to hang it on the back of the stool. 

“It’s not the same as buying one to surprise you with it,” Eric said with a wink. “Hungry?” 

I nodded. “Starved.” 

Once the new flowers were set in a vase in the middle of the kitchen counter, I sat with Eric as we ate. Every so often I caught him staring at me with a look of love in his eyes. Those dark orbs bled with his devotion to me. 

I wiped some food crumbs out of his mustache with a giggle. “You’re so in love with me you don’t realize you have food all over your face.” 

He kissed the inside of my palm once he captured it. “I love you, my daisy.” 

Every time he spoke his pet name for me it made my world spin, my heart leap into my throat, and warmth spread inside of my veins. I never felt a love like how I had with Eric. He was my everything and I would literally die for him. 

Not if he dies first.

Pushing away the harsh thought from my mind, I played with his glowing bind, trying to remember the good memories between us. I wouldn’t succumb to the darkness that lingered.

Eric was fine. 

He would be fine. 

We would be fine. 

When he went to clean up, I hastily pushed Eric’s hands away. “You rest. I’ll clean up.” 

Even though he’d been feeling stronger these last few weeks, I knew he wouldn’t say no to some rest. So as I cleaned up our mess from dinner, Eric looked through our rather large record collection before setting one in the player and soon an all too familiar song graced my ears. 

Oh, it won't rain all the time. The sky won't fall forever.

Looking over to Eric who stood in the middle of our living room with his arm outstretched towards me, he had a lazily smile on his face. He’d taken off the black beanie he always wore, showcasing his buzzed head. 

“Will you dance with me, my daisy? It’s our song,” he noted. 

I pulled at my dirty sweats and messy hair. “I’m not dressed for a dance, Eric.” 

“Are you kidding me?” His jaw fell agape, appalled that I would say something so insane. “You look absolutely breathtaking, Y/N. Even more so than on our wedding day.” 

Tears welled in my eyes when I saw the way his hands shook but didn’t want to ruin the mood. Eric was glowing with happiness and life. He hadn't wanted to dance in so long, especially to our song. I refused to deny him this. 

Linking our fingers together, I allowed him to pull me into his chest and I rested my cheek against it. His heartbeat was slow but erratic. I followed his lead like always as he swayed both of our bodies to the song. I let myself relax for the first time in so long, always worrying about if the chemotherapy would work, if Eric would survive, or if our binds would break away without me knowing. 

Eric must have sensed I was thinking those dark thoughts again because he gently lifted my chin up to him, laying a firm kiss to my lips. It was quick, almost too quick, and I didn’t want it to end. This was the first time in a while that we shared a kiss that wasn’t just a fast peck. I opened my mouth to let his tongue explore and I moaned into it, reveling in how he tasted. His scent engulfed my senses when my hands slipped up his chest to behind neck, locking them in place. 

I felt the hardness of his cock against my lower stomach so I broke away from the kiss for a moment, breathless. Ever since he started chemo, it was hard for Eric to get an erection. I spent most nights touching myself or using one of my toys, every so often he would watch. I tried to touch him, only for it to do nothing for him. He reassured me it wasn’t me, it was just the chemo. 

“Eric,” I sighed. “I don’t want to rush you.” 

He lifted me off the ground with a slight ease and I squealed while wrapping my legs around him. 

“What are you doing?” I asked when he started carrying us towards our bedroom. 

“It’s been too long, Y/N. I need to feel you again,” he said while kicking the door shut behind us. 

As much as we loved cuddle time with Ghost, we didn’t need him trying to sneak in at this moment. 

Laying me on the bed, Eric kissed me again with more force than the last one and I grazed my teeth over his bottom lip.

“Are you sure?” I asked after pulling away briefly. 

“Y/N,” he leaned closer to me. “You’re the only thing that matters to me right now. Please let me have this. I need this. I need you.” 

Without a second thought, I crashed my lips to his and pulled at his shirt, doing whatever I could to deepen the kiss. Breaking away from me, Eric began biting and sucking at the sweet spot of my neck, our movements becoming familiar with each other all over again. He remembered exactly where to touch or kiss that would set me off, in the most euphoric way. 

My name fell from his lips when I started to rut my hips into his, trying to scratch the itch that only he could scratch. As our clothes fell away and our bodies connected, his cock fitting inside of me like a glove, I etched the way he felt against me inside of my mind. 

Afterwards, with the sheet lazily thrown on top of me, I watched in bliss as Eric sat on the edge of the bed. His bare back tensed as he rested his elbows on his knees, taking a deep breath. The red marks that littered his skin were still visible thanks to my nails. 

“Are you alright?” I asked. 

He glanced over his shoulder at me with a fox smile. “Just tired. I can’t remember the last time I gave you three orgasms.” 

I winked. “It’s been awhile. I missed the way your tongue felt.”

Eric squeezed my ankle. “I’m going to get some water for us then we can maybe watch some twitch streams?” 

“I love how it has become our nightly routine,” I said with a small laugh. 

Every night, we would snuggle up in bed together to watch twitch streams; mostly Noah’s. I always found myself laughing at how unhinged he was, something Eric noticed but never saying anything. 

Eric rose from the bed with a groan but soon his large body collapsed to the floor with a thud, making me scream out in horror as I scrambled over to him. 

“ERIC!” I cried, kneeling in front of him. “Eric, baby. Are you alright?” 

He didn’t say anything and ice cold fear filled my veins when I realized his eyes were closed. 

“No, no, no. Please, no. Eric!” I sobbed now, letting out a wail when I laid a hand on his chest. 

NOAH

All I could feel was my body falling deeper and deeper, succumbing to the darkness that surrounded me. I couldn't breath, nails clawing at the skin of my throat as I tried to call out for help. 

Yet no one could hear me. 

There was nothing but inky blackness while my body continued to be thrown through whatever void I found myself in. I spun in the air over and over until I felt bile rise in my throat but did my best to keep it inside. If I threw up, the sheer intensity of the wind would cause it to smack me right in the face. 

A spark of color broke through the darkness and I let out a gasp, hands outstretched to reach for the red string. My fingertips brushed along the thread and I could almost taste the victory of being able to finally leave this void. Only for the string to wrap around me in quick loops. It began to tighten around me, forcing my arms to the side as I did what I could to fight against it. Seconds later, the red string snapped apart when a sudden weight sat on top of my chest, stealing whatever oxygen I had left in my lungs. 

Blinking my eyes rapidly, it took me a moment to realize that I had been dreaming and the weight I felt on my chest was not because of a red string, but because of a white fluffy cat whose blue eyes were staring into me. 

"Ghost," I groaned while rubbing the sleep from my eyes. "Does your mom know you're over here? Again?" 

The cat simply meowed in response before curling up against my neck. 

"I should probably bring you back to Y/N before she wonders where you ran off to this time," I mumbled, excitement filling my veins at the prospect of seeing Y/N. 

We’d found out there was a small enough hole in the shared fence line that Ghost would slip through to venture back and forth between the houses. At first, Jolly offered to fix the whole so Y/N and Eric didn’t have to worry about losing Ghost but Eric was quick to wave us off. He said he didn’t mind his cat coming for visits as long as we didn’t. Somehow in the span of a few weeks, all six of us ended up with shared custody of Ghost. Michael wasn’t too fond of the cat at first but took a little warming up before he didn’t mind waking up one morning to see the cat on our couch. 

Although, it had been awhile since we last saw Ghost. Y/N had mentioned that he was spending more time with Eric which was fine because it technically was his cat but I would be lying if I said I didn’t miss the cat. 

We’d just returned from our east coast tour a few days ago but due to the lack of sleep I had, I spent the time catching up on sleep because we were about to leave for Europe next week. Only this tour would be longer. We’d be gone for three weeks. Thankfully both Jesse and Michael would be home this time around so we didn’t need Y/N to keep an eye on the house for us. 

Y/N. 

I hadn’t seen or talked to Y/N since I arrived home a few days ago. She texted me once while I was on the road to tell me that she gathered all of our mail into a box and planned to give it to the first one of us she saw. 

While I was away, all I could think about was the memory of her naked, more so her ass. It plagued me like a disease, taunting me that I was unable to do anything about it. I had to watch from afar as she walked around her room naked. I wanted to be the one that was able to touch her. 

She’s married, you dumbass. Stop thinking of another man's wife naked!

“Alright, let’s get you home,” I sighed towards Ghost after motioning him to follow. 

When I stepped out of my bedroom, the sound of someone pounding on the front door shook the bones of the house and I appeared int he living room just in time to see Jesse rise from the couch. 

He’d been lounging on the couch with a bowl of pineapple chunks on his bare chest and his cat pajama pants, the one his girlfriend gifted him. 

“What the fuck is going on?” I asked as the pounding continued. 

Jesse shrugged while walking over to the front door. “Don’t know. Some chick has been yelling your name for the last few seconds.” 

Fuck, if it’s whats her name I might just jump off my roof. 

Ghost seemed unbothered by the banging on the door because he simply made himself at home at Jesse’s previous spot on the couch. When the front door opened, it felt as if the air was stolen from my lungs when I took in the sight of a broken Y/N; eyes red and puffy. Tears streamed down her face along with makeup and her hair was disheveled. I briefly saw red marks littering her neck but that wasn’t what had my attention currently. 

It was the bind on her wrist that was flickering. 

“Y/N,” I appeared next to Jesse. “What’s going on?” 

Her broken eyes bounced between us before settling on me. “It’s Eric! I-He-I can’t!” 

She blew out a shaky breath before grabbing my hand, leading me out of the house towards hers. 

tags: @artificialbreezy @blueskylinesx @dominuslunae @lobolocaamo @lilcrazy011 @badomensls @shayeanna-ashlie @supersquirrel1996 @missduffsblog @nicelittlenightmares @curse-bearing-hips @collisionofyourkissmakesitsohard @chey-h @idontwantthemoney @heyyoplayer @amelia-acero @xmads-omensx @poisongirl616 @theanarchymuse95 @trvshdxddy @thisbicc @losingmyselfinthoughts @follow-me-down-to-wonderland @alwaysfightforwhoyouare @klutzy-kay24 @xxkatsatwatwafflexx @collidewiththesavannah @tosoundlessdarkistare @rumoured-whispers @dontwantthemoney @montgomery-929496 @respectfulrebel l @chaoticwineaunt @fadingangelwisp @english-fucker @99png @Koskeepsake @lunabuna991 @sorrowsofsilence

[ravenstargames]

one hour to new years for me, so how would the LIs celebrate new years, if they do?

HAPPY NEW YEARS EVERYONE!! 💜🎉

The team has been celebrating and resting, but we are back to work! I've to organize a bunch of invoices, so expect our 2024 wrap-up and 2025 plans in a few days :^)

In the meantime—let's answer some asks!

✦ How would the LIs celebrate the new years?

Our new years! Kind of, because everyone celebrates the new year differently. Here in Spain we eat 12 grapes for each second into the next year—at 23:59:48, so I'm going to use that tradition for this!

Limbo has a kind of "new year celebration" but that's something for another time :^)

✦ Amon: Goes partying with friends. Drunk-calls everyone at 12 o'clock saying how much he loves them. Gets home at 8 am the next day.

✦ Raeya: Chill at home, preferably with family. Dresses up super cozy, with an ugly Christmas sweater. Loves cooking dinner for everybody and goes to bed early.

✦ Gael: Also chill at home, or at a nice hotel with his partner to see some fireworks together and have a romantic end and start of the year!

✦ Envy: They'd like to go to a kind of remote place to have some peace, like a cabin in the woods to watch the stars, stretch the night, and see how the fireworks light up the city from afar. He hates the noise from up close but the colors are pretty.

✦ Ara: You bet she's either at a friend's houseparty, hosting her own, or at a huge new years celebration party! Dances all night, probably stumbles upon Amon if they both go out, and smokes some weed!

✦ Xal: The less people the better. Celebrates at home but it's kind of like any other day for him. He maybe hangs out with his closest friends and partner to have some drinks, play videogames or board games...

✦ Father Pride: With family! Raeya and him would surely celebrate together if both of them are single, but he'd like to have all his children with him from once in a while. He sets up a lot of nice decorations, buys party bags with hats, wigs, etc.

✦ Lázaro: Another one who goes partying, but not to some rowdy place, but to an elegant meetup. This night is for them and their friends, so they book a table at a nice place to have some cocktails and...more stuff. They dress up very elegantly.

✦ Cécile: Doesn't see the point of celebrating something as the Earth doing a full spin around the sun, but prepares grapes anyway and calls the few people he genuinely likes to congratulate them. May be persuaded into a bigger celebration if he's dating someone, though.

[tsukii0002]

Mc and Luke have gone to get some stuff to continue celebrating the new year in the House of the Lamentations.

Luke: Hey Mc, don't you think a new year is kind of scary?

Mc: What do you mean Luke?

Luke: I never thought about this before coming to Devildom…. but things can change a lot in a single year…

Mc: *sighing* Yes, things in a year can change a lot, we don't know where we're going to be next year.

Luke: *looking at the ground* To have things that make me feel secure end or think that something I love is never going to be the same again… makes me feel insecure.

Mc: …

Luke: In a way… a new year is scary, I'm scared that the world I'm so happy in will be totally different, *looking at Mc* that my relationships… my relationship with you won't be the same.

Silence fell between them

Mc: *smiling* The new year is like a symbolism really, everything can change any time Luke, just because we enter a new year doesn't mean everything hasn't changed before.

Luke: That's true.

Mc: And change isn't always bad… sometimes it's scary and can make us anxious, but things come to an end and there's nothing we can do about it.

Luke: I know…

Mc: But, they also start, great things can begin, or they don't end and simply transform *placing their hand on the angel's shoulders* changes are part of our life and we have to learn to live with them.

Luke: But what if we change? what if we are no longer the way we were and… and we can't be together anymore?

Mc: Then, I will make an effort to get to know you again and to be your friend again, change doesn't mean forgetting, and if it's so important we can try that, with us, our relationship can transform.

Luke: *with crystalline eyes, making a little pout* I will also try my best to make you always love me Mc, even if you become an angel or a demon.

Mc: *smiling* Thank you Luke *hugging him* sometimes we worry so much about what's to come or what we can't change, that we don't see what we can do now.

Luke: *hugging them back harder* You're right Mc… if we only worry about the future we can never be happy.

Mc: You're right Luke, that happens to us a lot *leaving him and holding out their hand* now, we should get back, they've all taken too much Demonus to leave them unsupervised.

Luke: That's right, *taking their hand* we'd better hurry.

The two walked back on their way to the House of the Lamentations.

Mc: By the way Luke… has anyone said anything to you about this New Year's thing?

Luke: Solomon started talking about how little a year has always meant to him and how much it means now… he was actually laughing a lot, but it got me thinking about a lot of things.

Mc: Got it, no more human drinks at parties, noted.

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.

.

.

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Well, well, happy new year to all of you!!! 🎉🎉I hope you have started 2025 on the right foot and, as they say, I hope this year brings you only good things. Although we all know that almost never happens, in one year life can change a lot, to unsuspected points. When I started 2024 I never thought that Obey me! would end (I know it is only the official content of the game, not the franchise, but you know), although it is one of the things that has helped me to pass a not very good year for me, but life goes on, and just as things that we do not like can also come good things can come. Regarding a purpose for this new year in this blog well, keep creating content, create more complex stories about these characters that I love so much and focus more on world building and solve the mysteries that have been left open in the Devildom (now that everything is in our hands), work more on my Mc and draw a lot, a lot. Just as I hope to continue to see the Obey me! fandom alive and creating as many wonderful things as it has been so far, even more.

So, after this badge, it only remains for me to wish you a happy new year! And the wish that things will only get better for everyone.

Thanks for this year 🩷, a hug from this sheep in hell.

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.

[inkzectz]

in your Bigger than the sky animation benrey starts out as barney? that seems so interesting lore wise? i would love to hear about what you were thinking when you animated that askdhfjlagh and the sweet voice and dreading stare? no clue what it means but curious as hell

ok im gonna go a little crazy on this because this is my biggest/favorite bc ever.

In the full vods they refer to benrey as “Barney” for the first while, it’s kind of unclear why, from Wayne’s perspective it seems he just didn’t know his name and defaulted to the character models name, and gir and Holly said they thought the joke with benrey was he was Barney but wrong, and they kept calling him the wrong name, so bipple, booper, Bentley, but eventually benrey, the name said by scorpy, stuck.

All this to say, it’s a BIG hc of mine that he was intended to be Barney (in universe) but due to being self aware was able to break off from this character he was meant to be. it’s kind of implied within the series they all have fake memories of who they are, being AI they are supposed to sort of act a certain way to maintain the immersion but at the end of the day, nothing before the game booted up really happened.

And benrey knows this, benrey knew from the beginning nothing was real, that he wasn’t human, how it ends, that no one actually dies, the works. I also headcanon that he became self aware during the AI model training stages, that the guy in charge of training his AI as Barney, broke him causing his self awareness and he was just launched into the beta game fully aware of the circumstances of his existence. I don’t think he was fully aware of how everything in game worked though.

but this to me is why he seems to constantly be changing his view of Gordon, antagonizing him one moment and then being friendly the next, his feelings about him are complex, he knows from the beginning he isn’t actually Gordon Freeman, but a guy just playing half life. Being a security guard, he’s programmed to protect Gordon with his life, but he knows this. He knows what’s compelling him to care for Gordon isn’t himself but lines of code he’s bound to, and this is why he antagonizes him. But that’s a whole different rant on its own lol

That sequence at the beginning of the bigger than the sky animatic was supposed to be a false memory, something he was supposed to think happened, but the version of Gordon he remembers isn’t real. This idea of ‘Gordon’ is a concept that only exists in these fake memories. (This is also why I think he never calls Gordon by name throughout the series, because he knows it’s not actually him (besides that one time but it doesn’t count bc it was for a bit lalala I can’t hear you))

there wasn’t much thought into the details of that part, like the coughing into the hand with the sweet voice, I really just put that bc I thought it looked dramatic and cool 😓

BUT on the topic of this big ass hc of mine, it actually is super important to a upcoming project im working on, and I realized throughout the story boarding it might need some explanation because it also has a lot of flash backs to some fake memories.

Sorry this got super rant-y I tried to keep it as short and simple as I could, I love hlvrai, I think about it literally every moment of my life and have so many hcs

[iandoubt]

scott smajor with number 7 for your spotify asks?

omg anon sorry it took me so long to get to this, but here: Scott smajor with number 7, Ghost of You by My Chemical Romance!

textless and bgless under cut, as well as really long ramble caption vvvvvvv

I hope this is alright! If nothing else, I’m so so proud of drawing hair braiding, that took. So. Long. lol, anyway yeah I also really like how Scott’s hair came out, and I’ve never made a third life Jimmy design before so I came up with this on the fly and I really like how it looks. But yeah, I saw which song it was and thought of them immediately, Scott was so distraught at Jimmy’s death in third life, (prepare for ramble that is mildly unintelligible if you are not really geeky about MCR lore lol. The main stuff you need to understand is that mcr has four albums, I Brought You My Bullets You Brought Me Your Love, Three Cheers for Sweet Revenge, The Black Parade, and Danger Days: The True Lives of The Fabulous Killjoys, and all of them have a lot of lore) like they are so demolition lovers coded, especially because of the whole back from the dead thing where Jimmy is alive and well in later seasons but Scott is still grieving him and the memory thing with winners remembering which means Scott remembers third life and Jimmy doesn’t, reminds me of like (from my understanding of the story, which is different from other peoples because MCR lore is very vague) the inner turmoil of the lover from the three cheers lore who went to hell, and his lover is in heaven and on one hand he wants to reunite but on the other he knows his lover doesn’t even know he’s alive (-ish. Not sure how much his situation qualifies as “living”) and feels guilty, thinking that she probably won’t even want to see him again, because he’s killed so many people and he doesn’t want to ruin her paradise (I mean she misses him too and wants to see him again but he doesn’t know that, and also he rightly recognizes that he is an actual sociopath. I’m not saying c!Scott is crazy (well, as not-crazy as you can be in life series death games. Everyone is at least a little bit off their rocker. Woah, parentheses within parentheses, what is this!?), but I am saying the guy demolition lover absolutely is. I am also saying that c!Scott has self worth issues. At least in my headcannons. I also have a similar headcannon for Joel. Maybe that’s why they hate each other, their mad that they can’t sacrifice themselves for each other and then decided a murderous rivalry was the only option/j ) but yeah so the torturing themselves over a lover who is both dead for them and also at the same time alive and well but unreachable and in a better place than them and wanting to be with them but holding back for fear of hurting them which ends up hurting them anyway (which is also a theme in the black parade, so ig you could also kinda compare Scott to The Patient, but patient always felt more Joel or Pearl coded to me. Also yes I know I already made a post about smalletho demo lovers au, but idk I can have both smalletho and flower husbands demo lovers I just like projecting my interests onto,,,,also my interests ig lol) is something Scott and the sinner demolition lover have in common. Also this song makes me cry. So much. Could barely even draw this through the tears lol/silly, and I’m exaggerating but less than you’d think. Unfortunately I am a crier. I also cry at Summertime from danger days, pretty much all of three cheers but especially I never told you what I do for a living, demolition lovers from bullets (btw for non MCR fans these are album and song names. Also the demo lover’s story starts in bullets with the song titled for them, and then is continued in three cheers for sweet revenge) as well as I don’t love you, wttbp, the end, mama, and famous last words from black parade. And those are just the MCR songs, not counting all the other sad songs from other bands. I am a CRIER lol. But yeah, thank you sm for the ask anon I really enjoyed drawing this!

[the-darkestminds]

2024 Fic Writer End of Year Roundup

Answer and then tag three or more creators to keep the game going!

(If you're in my answers consider yourself tagged if you'd like to play!)

1. How many words did you publish on AO3 in 2024?

224,227. Would've been 232,998 BUT I decided to post RMWTLI chapter 3 tomorrow instead of today lol.

2. How many fics did you complete this year?

7!

3. How many in progress or ongoing fics did you start this year?

I currently have three fics in progress... Autumn's Shadow, Remind Me Where The Light Is and Rhysand Is The Most Handsome High Lord... !

4. What was your favorite thing you wrote?

Autumn's Shadow is my favorite fic. I have worked so incredibly hard on it and it's my first ever long fic. I'm very proud of it. I hope to finish it soon!

5. What piece was your most experimental or different from your usual style?

Rhysand Is The Most Handsome High Lord... is definitely the most experimental. It's my only fic that doesn't center around Eris and Azriel and it's very smutty and ridiculous. It makes me laugh lmao

6. Did any fics surprise you - either while writing or their reception

The series He Comes At Night surprised me. Somehow I sat down and wrote both of these each in one sitting and I had a lot of fun with the reader reactions lol. I didn't expect the wonderful responses I got but I am so grateful!

7. Do you have a fic you wrote and loved that went under the radar? (This is your sign to reblog/repost it!)

I am pretty proud of His Father's Son. I wouldn't say it necessarily went under the radar, OC fics tend to be less popular in general. But I didn't think I'd get this one done and when I did I was very happy with the result!

8. Who is an artist that inspired you?

There are soooo many. I wish I could list them all, but these people consistently wowed me with their art. I need more, always:

@palomita-de-la-sangre @fourteentrout @queercontrarian @elleybug @nus4y @lucychanart @olenvasynyt @bonecarversbestie @works-of-heart

9. Who is an author that inspired you?

This question is why it took me so long to make this post lol. I hate to leave anyone out, and I read so many fics this year and loved all of them. I'll do my best!

everything @chunkypossum writes moves me. I'll never get enough of their writing. I feel like they speak to me personally whenever I read one of their fics. @jules-writes-stories for JEL. She's incredible at world building and her writing is beautiful. @mistandmemories for her stunning rhythm !! and the insanely delicious tension and chemistry between az and eris. phew. @g00seg1rl for being hilarious and her crazy hot smut. @fourteentrout for his tamsand. the best I have ever read. and for somehow being just as insanely talented with azris too?! not to mention his art! I am obsessed. @/tessabeth for making me fall desperately in love with cazris. her writing changed me lol. no joke. @neciebee for her uniquely gorgeous style and sadlube. @acourtofladydeath for making me cry. @talibunny30 for her depiction of nesta that has stuck with me for months! I'll wait forever for more. @zenkindoflove for making me fall in love with alexius to the point where I forget he's not real! @crazy-ache for her creativity and beautiful writing. @lovely-vanserra-sunshine for breaking my heart in the best way with eris and lucien's backstories. @buffy-vanserra for eris's SNARK my god. it's so good. @clockwork-ashes for her lovely prose and seemingly endless ideas!! @thequeenofnightmares for her brain. the plot building is insane with this one. @shadowsandlint for keeping me on the edge of my seat! @jolenes-library for her super fun AU!! @born-to-riot for being able to do it all: fluff, intrigue, whump... she's awesome, and so funny.

I know I'm forgetting someone. If you're not here, it's only because my brain is overflowing. I love you all!! 😭

10. Who is a new author you discovered?

EVERYONE ABOVE lol. But also, copying chunky and giving a special shoutout to @jules-writes-stories, @mistandmemories, and @chunkypossum. The first two lovelies have been writing big azris fics along with me, and earlier in the year we all followed What We Deserve together. It's been the highlight for me for sure. Also, extra extra special shoutout to @pippsmcgee for her beautiful mind and incredible talent.

11. Did you do any collaborations? How did it start?

Editing to add that while I didn't technically co-write a piece with anyone, @pippsmcgee is my #1 collaborator and well on her way to becoming co-author lol

12. What accomplishments are you proudest of?

For becoming a writer! This was the first year I've ever written anything and now it's my favorite pastime and has been extremely cathartic.

13. What did you learn about writing or creating this year?

I am most happy with my work when I write exactly what I want without worrying about what might be the most popular. And I found that talking to other writers is motivating and so fun. Makes everything better.

14. Any advice you’d like to share with new or aspiring writers?

Please find joy in the process. If you don't enjoy what you're writing, write something else! And... fandom is about community. Writing has brought me to so many new friends. Don't be afraid to reach out to other authors! Spread the love!

15. What are your creative goals for 2025?

My main goal is to finish Autumn's Shadow. If I do that, I will be happy.

[cyborgdumptruck]

A review for Sonic Movie 3. Anyone who hasn't watched it yet, please do, I highly recommend it. The following text will contain some spoilers. For the record, I have been a Sonic fan since I was 10, so to me these movie series are a great deal.

I played Sonic Adventure not so long time ago, around 2020, unfortunately I just didn't have a console. So the feelings I had after the walkthrough were fresh (just as recent MGS3 walkthrough). So, this is my personal view on the movie adaptation.

Character design—As many fans have mentioned since the first movie, the redesign of the characters was a great move. They all look organic in a realistic environment. The quills and fur feel soft, and the details of the models are great.

Jim Carry did a great job portraying Robotnik. All of his scenes and his performance as Gerald are perfect, funny and close to the canonic Eggman. He had fun with this role for sure :3 Look at them go!

Agent Stone x Robotnik ship is now canon (Robotnik literally said, 'I love you' to him in his last moments), and I couldn't stop saying 'aaaaw' about their scenes.

OMG they even added CHAO

Maria's sequence is cute and fulfilling, she needed it. In games, she barely has screen time, so it is a big plus.

Also, the Ark was moved to Earth, Gerald is alive, and this plot line was different in Sonic Adventure, too, but I think it still makes sense. I like how the screenwriters made the plot fit the realistic setting and also filled the plot holes that were in the game.

No Biolizard boss fight :(

'I found you faker' scene reimagined was a chef's kiss

Shadow didn't say 'Chaos control' or 'I am the Ultimate Life Form' and that's alright.

No Black Doom, but the 'Black Arms' meteorite that arrived on Earth gives us the needed lore about Shadow's origin.

The final battle scene, the conversation between Sonic and Shadow on the moon, was fantastic. I almost got a tear. It's beautiful, they finally settle things between each other. Sonic just couldn't kill him; he is just not the type of character. The scrip writers dove deep into the lore and adapted it brilliantly.

Sonadow now feels more canon than ever. My inner shipper screams, "I must draw something with them." I also love the parallels of the moon scene. Of course, I also instantly thought of the Cyberpunk 2077 moon scene.

Tails and Knuckles were cute, and the group hug in the end was just aaaaw. Sonic Team & Knuckles made me chuckle 😄

I would like to rewatch it in English dub, obviously for Idris Elba and Keanu Reeves.

When 'Live and Learn' started playing I had goosebumps, and almost jumped out of my sit

Metal Sonic's and Amy's appearance was peak after the credits, holy shit

In conclusion, Sonic 3 is one of the greatest game adaptions I have seen so far. Every detail and every action scene doesn't feel overwhelming, I actually don't mind the plot's slight alteration from the canon. I enjoyed it a lot and I had lots of fun!

[igglemouse]

The State Of The Iggleverse 2025

The Iggleverse, a term I've used since starting my tumblr to simply explain my style of play. That is, everything I post is connected, from one sim to the next. The first iggleverse, that dated back to my first sim, Lourdes, went on for a few years and everything was connected.

I soft relaunched that iggleverse, which was easily done since, little did the reader know (since I never got that far) Telah had become the holder of the Watcher's Key (something I referenced then every now and then) and since I was literally the Watcher (well who else could it be!?) I used that little device to restart it even again. Dalton, Telah's son, who was the main heir in one of my darkest runs, had battled with Lovecraftian monsters and ancient deities and it had destroyed his universe...which was sort of explained by the introduction of his daughter who said she had escaped a destroyed universe...

Long story short, I still had connections to the first Iggleverse in even this latest one. For example, Gracelyn's mother was explained to be from another universe and her father was a traveller of different planes of existence...and her mother was a blood witch. Did this get mentioned? It might be mentioned in a post I have queued...but the term blood witch brings it all back to Dalton's story and a certain evil spellcaster that had summoned an ancient deity into his world...

All this to say. The iggleverse is kind of complex. I like that. But I try to tell a story with the intention of someone diving in at any moment and sort of getting right into it. It's why I always tell new readers, oh just jump in. To me, a story can be as complex as rocket science as long as the reader is focused on one thing at a time and is not overwhelmed. The past is a reference and the future is unknown.

After all, the beginning of any story is where you decide it is, but the ending, well, that's a lot more final.

The truth is, Frida, Zer, Gracelyn, and Teresa (who was cursed being 4th because of my fascination with odd numbers) have run their short course.

I hate doing this again but I only do it because it must be done. I realize that the way I was producing them and the past few set of heirs was completely wrong.

It took too long to even play one day of their gameplay because of how much I over thought things, over planned things, and then what made it worse is that I was still playing the game and so every time a sim did something different it meant rewriting the present and changing the future. For anyone that's tried to write a novel you know how much changing one thing can just cause a domino effect of you having to rewrite the whole thing...and this is what was constantly happening.

Example...I had a heir named Kyoko. Some of you may remember her, she was in Sulani and she had once met a sim that was supposed to be her romantic interest, don't remember his name, but they go out on a date and it was going well until one argument flipped her relationship with the guy. I was like well that sucks, I had like so much planned for this couple! But, I do not force my sims relationships, that would be boring! In the end, she end up becoming a mermaid and bleh...

Long story short, this is what was going on with my latest heirs and has been going on since maybe...I forget the last time I completed an actual heir maybe like 2021 or something?!?!

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

What Now?

Well, I do this for the love of the game! So, I still enjoy doing sim legacies and you will meet THREE new heirs very very very soon. Today, actually!

The Iggleverse must be made new and whole and beautiful and I hope these three heirs are the ones to bring it home and actually have a 2nd generations.

But who is to say you won't just do this again a few months from now?

Well, no one is to say, not even I know that! But, one of the big issues I had with the past one is how slow things were going. I was playing Frida for most of 2024 and she just now had a child! Like I mentioned, the production of my recent legacy attempts has been so slow. A whole episode was a lot of hours of work and then it'd just be like 3-5 days.

Back then I would have had multiple generations in a year like 2 or 3 and daily posting was easily done because I was usually sitting on like 70+ posts. I want to get back to that and the best part, I think I know how!

How?

I must put the legacy ahead of the story, for the longest I was putting story before legacy. It took some enjoyment out of the game because what was happening is I was planning out days for my sims for whatever the story I had planned for them.

Okay, but why not just do all the above and bring back the heirs I've read?

Because its just not how I work! I also have advanced the stories further than read and I don't like them. I feel like because I tried to do this mix of storytelling and plotting while doing gameplay it made me write my sims into arcs I didn't like. Kyoko's Mermaid...

Well, okay, but when will the new legacy start?

I don't have a date, could be tomorrow, could be a week from now, it just depends on when I feel like I am ready. It literally could be tomorrow though because the christmas week, the week I planned on posting Frida, Teresa, Zer, and Gracelyn, because I had time, I spent making new heirs and writing them and I have content ready to post! More than one might expect but that is because I've gone back to my old style of production. Which was legacy and gameplay first and story to tie it all together.

No big scrivener file with all the plots I have going (and there were A LOT), nothing but what the next sim day might bring!

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

TOO LONG DID NOT READ!

Well! Just know that I am still around and starting fresh (again), for those that were attached to the previous four heirs, well, I am sorry and like usual, if anyone wants spoilers I'll post them! I think I'll just post pictures and explanations of what I had planned actually!

Because I want this iggleverse to be completely fresh, no connections at all to any previous iggleverse!

So. New year, new me, but also still the old me! I hope that is good enough!

[squuote]

You ever think about how the epilogue and escape pod ending are directly tied to one another? How these two endings criticise the idea of freedom within the game in different yet similar ways?

You ever think about how the escape pod ending, normally, is just another instance of the game dangling freedom in front of the player's face, and how it directly speaks to the way that you must go against The Narrator's wishes in accessing it. Freedom is such a fascinating thing in TSP, because it is literally impossible for Stanley to have, and yet it is something that he so desperately wants--this is, perhaps, one of the only few things we know about him for sure. The only way to supposedly obtain it, is for either the player to give up their own agency to The Narrator and heed his words, or for the player to take Stanley's agency away from him. He's supposedly set free from being under someone else's control--but he wasn't, really. Just under new management. The escape pod ending is, presumably, supposed to be played with The Narrator accompanying Stanley, and yet the only way to access it is to leave him behind. To go back to the start, and have all other endings and branching paths completely torn away from you, regardless of whether or not you want to go somewhere else.

You ever think about how Stanley, in a moment finally outside of the player's control, in the bucket version of the escape pod ending, gives up his freedom? He finally has autonomy away form The Narrator, and from the player, and in this moment he makes the deliberate decision to forfeit his own freedom, to value the bucket's over his own?

You ever think about how the epilogue does away with the idea of freedom entirely, and actively encourages you, the player, to continuously reuse this game, over and over, to keep those gears turning, to set the wheel in motion, and to never, ever let it stop?

GOD YES. YES THIS. YOU GET IT YOU GET IT. LITERALLY THINK ABOUT THIS SO MUCH…

and then I also can’t help but think of the dialogue in the museum ending. how she says that the only way to free stanley is to just… not play, to give back his agency and to stop the game altogether. That Stanley was already dead from the moment he hit start. That no matter what our choice is, freedom is still out of reach. Only for this to be pushed away entirely by the epilogue’s desire to go on forever….

LIKE. LIKE IT ALL MAKES ME SO ILL.

[jules-writes-stories]

2024 Fic Writer End of Year Roundup

Answer and then tag three or more creators to keep the game going!

Thank you to everyone who tagged me! I'm sorry this is late. I've been working on it for days. It's really long.

1. How many words did you publish on AO3 in 2024?

366,893

2. How many fics did you complete this year?

9!

3. How many in progress or ongoing fics did you start this year?

I have 1 WIP: A Love That Bleeds and a Koschei x Eris fic that's not posted yet (but close to drafted).

4. What was your favorite thing you wrote?

I love all my babes equally, but I am most proud of Just Enough Light to Cast Shadows, which was my first fan fic, and a true labor of love.

5. What piece was your most experimental or different from your usual style?

Monster feels different from a lot that I've written. It's pre-cannon and examines Lucien and Eris's relationship, and is not ship-centered.

6. Did any fics surprise you - either while writing or their reception?

My Azris modern AU The Night Court Lounge really took me by the throat. It was supposed to be a slutty little spite fic and then it just took off. The boys caught feelings and I caught feelings. But I have @pippsmcgee to thank for hyping that story up. She was the brain child behind a big plot point, the pet names, and just talked me through positions and timing and what ifs... truly a gift.

7. Do you have a fic you wrote and loved that went under the radar? (This is your sign to reblog/repost it!)

Hmmm... not sure? Maybe my Amarantha x OC fic? It's hard to write pre-canon stories, especially for a villain! A Love That Bleeds is pretty dark and touches upon themes of slavery, love and autonomy, and is different from much that I write. But I am so proud of it.

8. Who is an artist that inspired you?

There are too many talented artists to list. Here are a few: @nus4y who makes Azriel's skin literally glow and everything just screams passion. LOOK AT HIS BRILLIANCE on A03 (NSFW)

@queercontrarian never fails to surprise me. Their take on the Court fashions, hair styles, jewelry. So much diversity and representation. THIS is one of my all time favorites. THEEESAN.

@palomita-de-la-sangre whose style is so unique and gorgeous and raw. This is what I mean.

@seihdacalling is immensely talented! Her Eris and pups and JEL Eris? AND LOOK AT MITHRAS (my beloved OC).

@bloodyplunder whose work is so passionate and full of color and movement. LOOK at this! AND (NSFW) LOOK AT JEL CHAPTER 25 on AO3!

@fourteentrout is inspired and talented. And all around incredibly kind and supportive. Just brilliant. LOOK AT FIRE SPRITE ERIS

@laxibbeb creates characters' faces in a way that hold so much emotion. NESTA is a favorite, omg... and AZRIEL IN STIRRUPS.

@elleybug @chunkypossum @lucychanart (who made me a Tamsand believer. God, this one?) so many more...

9. Who is an author that inspired you?

There are SO many. First and foremost, @chunkypossum who welcomes new creators with so much warmth and support. Every single story. Every word is magical. @iftheshoef1tz is another legend who is so kind and warm and wickedly talented. Every single story is perfection. Will they adopt me as my Azris parents? Maybe. Congrats! It's a shoe-possum!

@the-darkestminds is truly someone I could write a book about. The emotions she brings out with her characters and words will leave you breathless. If you want to feel, read her stories. You will walk away so full of every emotion, but also with a newfound appreciation for each character. And @mistandmemories whose Eris is the funniest, most clever, most lovable in the biz. Her Azriel makes me laugh constantly. How you ask? Shenanigans. Windows, pants, awkward moments of self doubt and a precious inability to communicate. Go read it. The plots, the politics. The WIT. The decades of delicious edging. (It was several chapters but gods it felt like a lifetime).

These two have been writing their own multi-chapter fics beside me this year, and without their friendship and support, I probably wouldn't have finished. ILY!

@pippsmcgee will never be rid of me and my neurotic little paws. This one just looks at a story, a character, a scene, and says "you know what will make it even more (painful, sexy, exciting)?" And you better listen. But she also wrote a beautiful story about young Azriel that inspired me so much this year.

@shadowsandlint is full of talent-- Her prose is layered with meaning and flows so naturally. I can't put her stories down.

@zenkindoflove For her OC Alexius, who is my baby forever and ever. Creating an OC is gutsy and brave and takes so much talent. She's got it all. Also stunning world building and dialogues! And don't get me started on Elucien...

@talibunny30 For her depictions of young Nesta and her OC Boudica. She shows so much of Nesta's trauma in a thoughtful and honest way. I love it!

@neciebee whose writing is like poetry. Every time I read it I'm like, wait! Come back. Tell me more. I want... more? Gimme!

@witch-and-her-witcher whose fics are so magical. Her Nessian is my all time favorite. Nesta, Cassian, the Illyrian culture that she built for us. Just stunning.

@born-to-riot for VAMREN. But also sexy plots, hilarious shadows, and fluffy Azris moments we need.

@acourtofladydeath for writing pieces that challenge readers to sit with uncertainty-- gray characters and grief that lingers but also carry lessons and hope.

@secret-third-thing for such perfect storytelling-- every word matters and every image counts. The descriptions and details are exact, the settings are lush and imaginative. Also, Artaban.

I could keep going... If you are not on this list, but I've commented or left kudos or bookmarked your fic, you've left a mark. If not, I'm coming for you in 2025!

10. Who is a new author you discovered?

@g00seg1rl who writes smut like a witch. A very sexy witch. @nus4y who is another sexy witch? Watch out for these two. @jolenes-library is so talented! Motorcycle Azris AU. Enough said. @buffy-vanserra whose prose is beautiful. Every word matters. @clockwork-ashes has so many lovely pieces I couldn't choose just one. @unanswered-stars for those damn letters. You know the ones. I'm still crying. @yanny-77 : Best Elain in the biz. And the Lip Ring.

11. Did you do any collaborations? How did it start?

@brunetterebel010 @mistandmemories and I wrote A Solstice Carol. It started as a lot of joking about Rhys being Scrooge. And it became a true passion project! @talibunny30 helped with brainstorming ideas and beta reading, and @fieldofdaisiies and @pippsmcgee beta read.

Also my partner in crime in all Azris fics: @pippsmcgee who talks me through plotting the political animal, asks the important questions, and twists the knife of angst. She keeps my eyeball obsession in check.

12. What accomplishments are you proudest of?

I'm most proud of Just Enough Light to Cast Shadows. It really is silly, but finishing it, right at the end of 2024, and looking back at all the new friends I've made along the way, and how it has touched other people just makes this year feel special.

Thank you so much to @pippsmcgee for helping me land that plane. And for being my very first comment, ever. When I saw you and @talibunny30 and @neciebee were reading, I felt legit. And to @mistandmemories and @the-darkestminds who were on this journey with me. It was so important to walk beside you during it all!

13. What did you learn about writing or creating this year?

Write was brings you joy. Comparison is the thief of that joy. You can only write your own story, and it's ok if it's not for everyone. Because a story that is everyone's is probably no one's, you know? It will reach the people it needs to.

Outlines are important (for my process). They saved my ass so many times. And beta readers. And friends. And reader-readers. They all saved me too.

14. What is your advice?

Surround yourself with people who cheer you on. Be sure to support other creators. The community aspect of fandom is important. We're all just out here putting our hearts onto the screen and hitting Post.

15. What are your creative goals for 2025?

Finish A Love That Bleeds, Finish my Koschei x Eris fic, and start plotting out a longer Azris multi-chapter fic. It's a little seed right now, but one day soon...

[deadhands69]

Three Words

Tomura Shigaraki x Reader 

Fluff ☁️ From the First Five ask game  I'm so happy I get to start the year with Shigaraki! Requested by @shigarakislaughter, thanks Kisa!

Tomura Shigaraki wants to say he loves you, he really does. But every time he opens his mouth, everything in him freezes and the words won't come out. 

To you, it's a silly little quirk your boyfriend has. Every time you do something sweet or nice for him, he opens his mouth before suddenly closing it and biting his lip while staring at you. It's cute.

To him, it's confusing and frustrating. It's just three words. What’s wrong with him?

Love is a new feeling for Tomura. Initially, he thought he was getting sick. Feeling warm. Butterflies in his stomach. Has to be a bug. But when it didn't pass after a week, he became concerned. Hours of Googling later, he comes to the conclusion that he does, in fact, love you. It feels right. 

He's never been one to shy away from saying how he feels, but this time’s different. What if you don't feel the same? What if you feel so far from the same that you reconsider why you've even been spending time with him at all? 

He can't bear the thought of that, but he also can't continue to keep this to himself. He needs you to know how he feels. 

Maybe it's just a matter of finding the right time.

So, he began spending more time with you. Every spare moment he had, he’s been trying to spend around you in some way or another. Meetings. Walks. Late nights playing video games. Perfect moments came and went: still he couldn't say it. 

Maybe there's another way to show how he feels. Again, he Googles it.

He began doing (more) nice things for you. Bringing you warm drinks in bed when you wake up. Rubbing your shoulders to help you relax at the end of the day. 

He left enough tiny gifts outside of your door that he was beginning to feel like a cat. Candies you said you like. Cool looking rocks and sticks. Little trinkets that remind him of you. When he writes the notes to attach to each of them, he wishes he could write more. He feels so pathetic. He can't even bring himself to write "i love you" without his hand shaking so hard the whole page is illegible. So, “from Tomura” it is. (Once he managed to draw a heart, but it looked more like a squashed strawberry. When you asked what it was, he simply agreed with your assumption - terrified to admit how badly he botched something so simple.)

Now, you're sitting on your bed together. It's well past two am. You're showing him a project you've been working on, it's finally starting to come together.

“You’re so cool,” he mumbles, tipping his chin down so his hair falls over his face.

“Thanks,” you speak with more confidence than he could ever imagine himself having in a moment like this. “You’ve been so sweet lately. Almost too sweet,” you eye him in mock suspicion. “What’s going on?”

The blush dusting his cheeks deepens. Once more, his mouth opens but the words don’t come. His discomfort feels like it could last forever, how hard should it be? It’s just three short words. Finally, he gives in. Turning his head from you and looking away.   

“Oh,” you whisper, “I see.”

Your hands find his jaw. Cupping his face, lightly moving him to look at you again.

“I love you too.” 

He smiles; you get it.

masterlist

[livelaughlou]

2024 Fic Roundup

tagged by the delightful @loucifersbitch.

Whoo buddy. Um. I might be a little obsessed with Bucktommy?

I've written 61 fics for a total of 234, 387 words. All bucktommy. This is literally the most I have ever written for a fandom. And that's not counting the little ones I've written lately.

April 2024

Just a Little Something (My first bucktommy fic and the start of the Name of the Game series)

Tommy didn’t think this was how his morning was going to go, that’s for sure. But he’s sitting across from a gorgeous man, holding his hand in the sun. It’s a beautiful day and he wishes he didn’t have to go to work later. __________________________________________________________________________________________________

OR: What happened after Tommy agreed to go to the wedding? Post 7x5.

Off the Deep End

This follows Just a Little Something as Buck and Tommy get to know each other and Buck figures himself out in the time between the coffee date and Maddie and Chimney's wedding.

If Love is Fire then I'll Burn for You

Five times Tommy resists telling Buck he loves him and the time he stops resisting.

Part 3 of the Name of the Game series.

May 2024

At Home

Tiny little post 7x06 ficlet. Buck and Tommy after Maddie and Chimney's wedding.

Lighter

Buck and Tommy run into someone from Tommy's past. Part 4 of Name of the Game.

A Little Like Lightning

The anniversary of the lightning strike is coming up so the team and Tommy rally around Buck. Part 5 of Name of the Game.

The Other Side

Buck meets Tommy's parents and gets a glimpse of what it could have been like had his parents been totally different. Part 6 of The Name of the Game

The Morning of the Day

Tommy gets held hostage in a coffee shop on his and Buck's anniversary.

Because of course he does. Part 7 of The Name of the Game.

June 2024

After

“You okay?” Buck asks, running his hands down the back of Tommy’s head, fingers scraping his scalp. Tommy all but purrs at the sensation.

“Yes,” Tommy answers, eyes searching Buck’s, expression tender. “You feel amazing. I’m never going to get enough of this.”

“God, me neither,” he looks at Tommy, smiles slowly, and decides right then to give it a try. He leans up just a little so he can reach Tommy’s ear as he wraps a hand around Tommy’s neck. He whispers, low and breathy, “Daddy.” The second it comes out of his mouth, he knows he loves it. __________________________________________________________________________ Post 7x10.

Hold onto Me ('Cause I'm a Little Unsteady)

The medal ceremony for the cruise ship rescue for the 118 and Tommy is coming up and Buck has a week and a half to prepare Tommy for Gerrard's presence. He's got a few things up his sleeve. Part 8 of The Name of the Game.

Better Late Than Never

“What are you guys doing here?”

“Well, we had a little emergency…”

Tommy tilts his head and Buck can see him scan his body with the eye of a first responder, as though looking for injuries. “Emergency?”

“Yes." Buck smiles at him sweetly. "I missed you.”

OR: Buck and Tommy haven't seen much of each other lately. Buck remedies that. Part 9 of The Name of the Game.

In the Wind

“Hey baby,” he greets, as cheerfully as he can when he sees the state Evan’s in. The right side of his face has a nasty, dirty gash from brow to jaw, but Tommy doesn’t think, at a quick glance, it’ll need stitches. He’s also cradling his right arm to his chest. Tommy gets to work immediately, getting the other harness around Evan. “Fancy meeting you here.”

Or: Tommy lends a hand when Buck gets stuck on the side of a cliff.

String of Fate

Soon, he’s having the time of his life dancing with Karen and a couple of guys ask to cut in, a couple of women do too, and Buck dances with all of them, but no one sparks his interest.

Until the beautiful guy with the cleft in his chin taps Buck on the shoulder as he and a woman named Beth are finishing a fast dance, Karen having long since made her way back to Hen for a break.

“Hi,” the guy’s smile is gorgeous. He’s got tousled brown hair, dark blue eyes, and is wearing a dark blue button-up shirt that really makes them pop. He’s also built like a damn tank, and Buck feels an instant pang of attraction.

“Hi,” he says brightly. “Wanna dance?”

Or: What if Buck and Tommy's first kiss happened a totally different way?

Outside the Lines

He’d spent at least an hour tracing his fingers up and down Tommy’s body, watching the goosebumps on Tommy’s skin, feeling the shivers that overtook him. Buck always wants to touch him, but it’s nights like these where he takes his time with Tommy, putting his hands everywhere he can get them, the tips of his fingers finding moles, scars, and the lines of his face that show especially when Tommy smiles at Buck.

Or: Buck loves every spot of Tommy's skin.

Hitch in the Plan

“Let’s talk engagement party.” “Yes,” Buck says, holding out a fist for Tommy to bump and he does with a grin. “I’m so excited.” “Me too,” Tommy says, leaning forward in his seat. “What do you have for us?” “Okay, so I’m thinking something low-key. You guys are family-oriented, so I know you’d want your families there, found and biological.” “Yeah,” Buck says, nodding eagerly. “Exactly.”

Or: Maddie is helping Buck and Tommy plan their engagement party but certain members of their families throw a wrench in things. Part 10 of The Name of the Game.

July 2024

Tumbling Down

It happens so fast. The shaking under him worsens, the ground moves and he’s sliding first and falling second. He swears he can hear Tommy yell. Before everything goes dark, he has the presence of mind to press ‘1’ on his phone.

Or: Buck and Tommy go on a hike that ends up being far more dangerous than either of them had planned.

Call Me By My Name

“Tommy was just telling us how great you are.” “He is,” Tommy agrees. “He’s my favorite person. He worked hard to help organize this party too.” Evan shrugs shyly, and Tommy marvels at how different his demeanor is around his parents, as though he’s trying not to take too much space. “It was fun.” “You did a good job,” Maddie says fondly. “I helped a little too,” Tommy says, which is true. “Right, Buck?” Even Maddie looks surprised at that. Evan blinks at him slowly. Then he says, “Yes, you did, and, no absolutely not on the name.”

Or: Tommy sticks up for Buck with his parents and learns something he doesn't expect about Buck in the process. Part 1 of Call Me By My Name.

Call You By Mine

“Okay,” Maddie says slowly. “So let me get this straight: both you and Buck plan to propose to each other, but you don’t know how and you don’t know when.” “Exactly,” Tommy confirms. “Oh also, we both have the belief that we want over-the-top romantic proposals.” Maddie raises an eyebrow. “Do you?” Tommy shrugs. “I mean, would I love it, yeah, but I’ve been thinking of this for the last couple of days and honestly, he could ask me to marry him in a dumpster and I’d say yes.”

Or: Tommy and Buck plan their proposals to each other. Something, however, is bound to get in the way. Part 2 of Call Me By My Name.

August 2024

Aftermath

Just a little missing scene after Chimney tells Gerrard off at the medal ceremony in 7x09.

Admiration

Tommy really, really loves Buck's new hairstyle.

Protective

Tommy confronts Gerrard after one too many comments to Buck.

Eddie Diaz's Couch for Couple's Counseling

"Why don’t you both come over to my place? We’ll set up Chris so he’s playing video games in his room and you can talk in a neutral location.” Buck considers this. “What are you, our couple’s counselor?” Eddie snorts. “You know what, yeah, man, if I have to be.”

Or: Buck and Tommy have their first big fight. Eddie helps.

A Little Less Conversation

"Hey handsome," A voice says behind him, close enough for Tommy to hear over the live band in the bar. "What's a guy like you doing in a place like this?"

Tommy knows he's hitched himself to a total dork, but he's perfectly okay with that.

Devout

He loves this. He loves everything about Tommy, but this... It’s the way he got to come to Tommy’s house, which feels far more like home than his loft ever has. It’s the way Tommy was excited to see him, it’s the way he fills him, covers him, kisses him, and touches him...it’s almost sublime. Every aspect of their relationship is something to be savored.

Buck really really loves Tommy.

Love in the Name

The progression of Buck and Tommy's relationship through pet names.

Parenthood

The adventures of Buck, Tommy, and their daughter Alex.

The Fire in the Fall

The air feels suffocating and even through his turnouts, the heat is reaching unbearable levels and they haven’t even entered the complex yet. He looks at the burning building in front of him and sighs, thinking that he would pick today, one of the worst days he’s had in a long time, to volunteer to help with ground ops.

Or: Tommy Kinard has a very bad day.

Andrew, They're Husbands!

“So, what you’re saying is-” Evan Buckley, says, resting an arm on the shoulder of another guy, tall handsome, with brown hair, and taking a bite out of a giant blueberry muffin. “-that you think you could beat me in an arm wrestling contest.” He hadn’t been here in the loft area when this guy arrived, but Andrew doesn’t think he’s part of the 118. Or at least, not part of the A-shift. He’s not uniform, but he can’t get much more of a handle on him than that.

Or: Probie Andrew Olson can't figure out what's up with the handsome guy Evan Buckley seems to be standing awfully close to. Part 1 of Probie Andrew.

A Light at the End of the Tunnel

It’s one of those days when the intrusive thoughts and spiraling anxiety can’t be distracted with video games and research binges, when getting out of bed takes more energy than just staying in it. When the tears come whether he wants them to or not because his emotions don’t have anywhere else to go.

Or: Buck is having a bad anxiety day. Tommy helps.

In from the Cold

Buck and Tommy go to Minnesota to visit an old Army friend of Tommy's. They get into a little trouble before they leave. Part 11 of The Name of the Game.

Andrew, They Made It!

Andrew is quiet for a moment and bites his lip as he stops at a red light. He’s had something he’s been wanting to ask but hasn’t had the chance. He's not sure now is really the right time, but they did tell him he could ask questions whenever he wanted, so, he might as well give it a try. In the time he's been getting to know Buck and Tommy, he's learned Tommy is a very straightforward guy. If he doesn't want to answer, he won't. "Hey, can I ask you a question?" he asks as the light turns green. He can see Tommy looking at him from his peripheral vision. "Will it distract me from the trouble my disaster-prone husband has had heaped on him this time?"

Or: Andrew picks Tommy up to get to Buck after an incident. He has questions. Sequel to "Andrew, They're Husbands!"

It's True, I Will Rescue You

“I’m training a new probie who seems a little off in ways I can’t describe.” Evan frowns. “What did he do?” “Nothing...I don’t know, just got a weird vibe from him.” Evan grins. “Look at you, talking about vibes.”

Or: A new probie seems to be unable to take the word "No" when it comes to Tommy. How far will he go?

September 2024

In the Name

"You know," Maddie says, amused. "I knew Buck might be an issue with planning this whole wedding, but you, Tommy?" Tommy shrugs. "It's gonna be my first and only wedding. Might as well go all out."

As Tommy and Buck begin planning their wedding, there's some uncertainty about whether their parents will be involved. Part 3 of Call Me by My Name.

Brace for Impact

“Ready, Sergeant Grant?” “Tommy,” she says, checking the straps holding her to her seat. “You just rappelled out of a helicopter and into this plane and are about to attempt to land it in a field in the middle of nowhere. I think you can call me Athena.”

Or: Tommy and Athena try to land a plane safely. Season 8 speculation.

Growing Pains

Buck and Tommy give a school tour to a group of 4th graders.

Bring Your Glory, All You Are

“I’ve noticed something about you,” Tommy says, bracing his arms by Evan’s head to hover over him because there is a pattern of Evan’s he sometimes sinks into in moments of uncertainty that he’s been wanting to...well, correct. Evan blinks, clearly caught off guard at the abrupt conversation change. “What?” Tommy kisses him gently. “Well, it’s like with tonight’s dinner.” “Oh, well, I told you I haven’t really mastered that recipe yet, but-” “No, no,” Tommy insists. “That’s not what I meant at all, but it illustrates my point. See, you sometimes have a tendency to downplay your own abilities.”

Or: Tommy's noticed something about Buck since they started dating.

Post 7x10.

Reprieve

Just a little moment of peace for Buck and Tommy.

Of Holding On and Letting Go

“Well, Captain Kinard,” the committee member says and he really wishes he could remember the guy’s name. He tried squinting at the nameplate, but he left his reading glasses in the SUV and he can’t see it from here. “I’m assuming you have thoughts about this?” Buck stands, having long since gotten used to the name. The ‘Captain’ had taken even longer. He tucks his dress uniform hat under his arm. “I do.”

Or: Far in the future, Buck has some decisions to make about his life going forward.

Take off and fly and dive right in

Tommy's learned a lot of things about Evan in the last six months, that he likes to cook and take care of those he cares about is certainly one of them. Tommy, well, Tommy's long since realized that Evan himself is Tommy's new favorite anything.

October 2024

If you ain't comin' with me, I don't wanna go

“Psst,” Evan’s saying, and Tommy looks at him to see he’s got a hand around his mouth as though he wants to tell Tommy a secret, which honestly, is not new so far. He’s told Tommy many ‘secrets’ he already knows, like that he’s bisexual, that he really hates Gerrard, and that also, he really hates golf. Considering how he got a golfing injury and required surgery in the first place, this is not really surprising.

Or: Buck's a little high from anesthesia and pain medication. Tommy just thinks he's adorable.

Stick the Landing

“ATC, Sergeant Grant, I think I can help.” Athena can hear a sound like...helicopter blades? “Yes?” Athena says urgently. “Who am I speaking with?” “Firefighter Kinard,” Tommy Kinard says over the line and Athena holds her breath. “Maddie Buckley patched me through. I have an idea.” “Tommy,” Athena breathes out. “Tommy. What have you got? I’ll take anything.” “Well, I’ve been on standby, just in case and well, it’s kind of insane.”

Or: Tommy helps land the plane. Post 8x02.

Cheesy Eggs and Cough Syrup

When he gets to Tommy’s door, he leans against it out of sheer relief. The adrenaline and sheer insanity of the whole plane thing and trying to get Athena and the rest of the passengers down safely is finally leaving him. His thoughts are interrupted when he hears a faint cough from the other side of the door and he winces in sympathy. He’d hoped that would have been better by now.

Or: Buck goes home to Tommy after 8x03.

It's Freakin' Bats!

He startles awake with a gasp, sitting straight in bed. He’s scared and he doesn’t know why so he closes his eyes, breathes deep, and feels himself start to relax. Once the feeling fades, he looks at the time, and sees it’s just after 2AM. Grabbing his phone, he opens his text thread with Tommy and sends a heart.

Or: it's Buck and Tommy's first Halloween together and Buck's not quite feeling himself.

Contact

Just a little post 8x05 ficlet. Tommy helps Buck with his little skin problem.

Names in the Sand

They get their room keys and are barely inside the room before Tommy turns around, cupping his face and pulling him into a glorious kiss. When they break away, Tommy's smile can only be described as dreamy and Buck is pretty sure he lost all sense of space and time. “Wow,” he says, wrapping his arms around Tommy’s neck. “You can kiss me like that any time you want, Mr. Kinard.” Tommy snickers. "Couldn’t help myself. I know we've been married for months now, but every once in a while, I remember that I get to call you my husband." Buck grins. "Me too."

or: Buck and Tommy on their honeymoon. Part 4 of Call Me By My Name.

Just Breathe

Evan runs a hand through his hair. “You okay?” “Yeah,” Tommy says, clearing his throat against the slight tickle. “I’m okay. Think I’ve just got a small cold coming on or something.” Evan frowns and feels his forehead. “You don’t feel warm.” “It’s okay,” Tommy assures him. “It’s probably nothing.” “Okay,” Evan says eyeing him a little skeptically. “You’d tell me if it wasn’t?” “Sure,” Tommy answers, avoiding Evan’s eyes as he takes another sip.

Or: Tommy ends up with a cold and finds he has more people in his corner than he realized.

November 2024

Collateral Damage

"It’s our first night off together in forever. I was wondering about dinner? Stay in or go out?” Tommy thinks about how to answer that. An answer that doesn’t make any sense should set off the alarm bells he needs. "Um, you know, we talked about that chicken the other night," Tommy says as nonchalantly as he can. And he can hear it. Evan's not making a sound but he knows something is up because they never had any such conversation. "Did we?" Evan says just as carefully. "We did," Tommy answers and decides to use his ace in the hole. "Didn't we, Buck?" "You're in trouble," Evan says immediately.

Or: Tommy's held hostage at Harbor station.

Out of the Woods

“Please stay,” Evan pleads, Tommy can hear the edges of tears in his voice, and his own eyes fill against his will. “Please don’t leave; talk to me. This isn’t the guy who agreed to go to my sister’s wedding with me. This isn’t the guy who took care of me after I dislocated my shoulder and went to a funeral for a dead outlaw just because I asked him to.” Tommy raises his hand and wipes his eyes before turning slowly. Evan’s still sitting on the island, looking at him pleadingly. Tommy walks back to his seat and sits down, and Evan exhales slowly. “Thank you,” he says and Tommy sees his hand shift slightly, as though to take Tommy’s but he doesn’t. Tommy wishes he would.

Or: Tommy doesn't leave. 8x06 fix-it fic.

promise me that you'll hold me close

“Hey,” Eddie’s voice pops through his thoughts and he looks up to see him and Howie looking at him in concern. He sort of hates that, but is also grateful adding to the confusion about how he feels tonight. “Sorry,” he says, leaning forward and taking a sip of his beer, which is pretty good actually. It’s hard to find craft beers he isn’t picky about. Evan used to gently tease him about it. Just thinking that makes a pang of hurt strike through his heart. “I’m good.” Eddie and Howie look at each other in unison. “No, you’re not,” Eddie says, setting his beer down. “We had hoped to distract you tonight, but it’s not working is it? Come on, man, you’re 40 today.”

Or: Tommy's birthday is a few days after the break up, but thankfully he's not alone. 8x06 fix-it.

Love Like That

He wants to write a veritable novel, about how he feels, why he asked him to move in, and what freaked him out so badly that he ran instead of staying to talk. He wants so damn much that he’s too afraid to ask for.

Or: 3 times Buck gives Tommy a baked good and one time he doesn't have to. Post 8x07.

Repeat and Redo

Tommy exhales slowly. “This was a good idea.” Buck kisses him again. “Yeah. It was. It’s also a really good thing we have the theater to ourselves.” Tommy laughs, and they watch the movie, interspersed with gentle kisses like they can’t resist. Buck thinks this is the best second-first date he’s ever had.

Or: Buck and Tommy have a redo after they reconcile. Another 8x06 fix-it fic.

TLC

Buck knows Tommy loves to take care of him and he'd be lying if he said he didn't love it. He's never had anyone who wanted to take care of him before. He will always remember Billy Boils and his curse, and Tommy's skepticism and acceptance. But he wants to take care of Tommy, too, and Tommy rarely lets him. They'd had an argument about it once after a rescue gone wrong, when Buck had to push and push until Tommy broke down in his arms over losing a patient. So every once in a while, Buck takes care of Tommy.

Or: Tommy has a bad day. Buck wants to make it better.

i see you in my fireflies

“Anything you need to talk about?” he says and Tommy can see he’s practically bouncing in place. “No, baby,” Tommy says with a grin. “But thank you for asking.” Evan throws his hands up. “I don’t want to neglect you or anything. I want to make sure I’m giving you what you need.” Tommy finally sets the bag by the door and throws his keys on the little side table there for that purpose before moving toward him and wrapping careful arms around his waist, mindful of the broken arm in a sling as he pulls him in, kissing his forehead. “You’ve been obsessing haven’t you?” Evan sighs. “My dick has betrayed me.”

Or: Buck's on pain meds that have made things difficult. He does have an idea for Tommy, though. Part 1 of Light Me Up.

in the clear yet, good

"...look, as your best friend, I felt like it was my duty to help you avoid calling your ex, but Buck, I've never seen you like this before. With anyone. I wasn't around for Abby, but, from what I’ve heard, that wasn’t great either?" "Oh, that was a mess, too," Buck assures him and Eddie raises an eyebrow. "The same kind of mess?" Buck thinks about that for a second. "No. It was just...different." "Well, regardless," Eddie says, sitting back. "We were too flippant about this because you're clearly not getting over it. Right?" "No," Buck admits, because no. He's nowhere close. "I think I'm in love with him."

Or: Eddie does a little meddling and Buck doesn't have it in him to be mad about it.

all you have to do is stay

“You left,” Buck accuses. “I know,” Tommy answers. “I regretted it the second I walked out your door. I just...after what I said, I wasn’t sure I deserved to come back.” Buck backs away, looks at his face, and sees the tears in his eyes. “So why did you come this time?” “You asked me to,” Tommy answers simply. “You need me, I’ll come, Evan.”

Or: Buck has a panic attack and asks for help. It's just not who he was expecting.

Liminal Spaces

It happens so fast, that Tommy's not even sure how it starts. First, he's walking toward Evan, slowly, hesitantly, after a quick mental conversation with himself when he decides he's just going to go say 'hi' and test the waters, try not to say ‘ImissyouImissyouImissyou’ when he hears the sound of car tires squealing. It comes out of nowhere, he thinks, the car, going so fast that Tommy doesn't have time to think. Because it's heading straight for Evan. No. No, that's not happening. So Tommy runs as fast as he can and pushes Evan out of the way, hard.

Or: Tommy saves Buck from an aggressive driver and he and Tommy figure things out along the way.

December 2024

Truth or Dare

Buck and Tommy and a kind of new beginning.

i want to see you with my eyes

Buck loves him like this. He loves him anyway he can get him of course, but this man...the man who got so scared of how much he loved Buck, afraid to show who he really was for fear that Buck wouldn’t love him that he ran, to the man who came back at Buck’s door three days later, near tears and begging for forgiveness to the man who proposed six months later over Mexican food, unplanned because he just couldn’t help himself...this man who he married on the beach in front of their family and friends, who’s still slowly learning that, not only is it okay to be himself, but that Buck loves him unconditionally for all of it…this man who lets Buck in, who looks so relaxed and happy right now that Buck knows he would do damn near anything to keep him that way.

Or: Tommy asks to start exploring some kink in bed. Buck is determined to give him exactly what he wants.

i choose us every time

“You’re sweet, coming here just because he asked you to.” Tommy shrugs, looking back at Evan, Karen, and Maddie. “I love him. Anytime he asks me to do something I didn’t expect to do, whether it be small or not, I’m okay with it. More than, because it’s the least I can do." Hen regards him carefully. “You trying to make up for misdeeds?” Tommy shrugs but she seems to know anyway. “You know he doesn’t think of it that way. You guys worked everything out and are better than ever.” “I know,” Tommy admits. “But I’ve also spent a lot of my life going with the flow...being with him opens up my world, you know?”

Or: 5 times Tommy doesn't say no to Buck, stepping out of his comfort zone, and 1 time Tommy doesn't even need to think about it.

take my whole life, too

"I have an idea," Buck says slowly. "And you can say no, well, I mean, I wish you wouldn't because I really want to help you, but-" "Evan," Tommy says, and if Buck isn't mistaken, there's an undercurrent of affection there. "What's your idea?" "We get married," Buck says before he can change his mind. "So you get your inheritance." Now it's Tommy's turn to spit beer all over their table. “Evan, have you lost your mind?”

Or: Tommy has a problem. Buck has a solution. Currently posted 5/9 chapters.

a story for another day

He dresses quickly, rushes down the stairs, pulls his stuff together and figures he'll grab a muffin or something at the coffee shop. He's there within fifteen minutes, getting out of the car just as his phone goes off with another text. He's walking toward the coffee shop and has just gotten to the door as he reads a demand from Eddie for a cupcake when he walks right into a brick wall. Well. A brick wall that makes an 'oof' noise and then a 'damn it.'

Or: Buck meets Tommy in an entirely different way.

WHEW! That was some work. Thank you to everyone who has supported me, especially @louvemeanyway and @desert--moonchild who have been beta readers and sounding boards.

no pressure tags (sorry if you've already done this): @louvemeanyway, @desert--moonchild, @mmso-notlikethat, @cjlouwho, @herrmannhalsteadproduction