#that album was my jam when I was a kid and I never really grew out of it

[dollarbin]

Shakey Sundays #1:

Neil Young's Neil Young

My buddy Greg asked me last weekend, very earnestly, why Neil Young? Why is he your favorite artist? Why?

Greg likes Neil. But he doesn't own 38 different Neil records which are what he'd grab, along with his kids and, I guess, the cat, if the house was on fire; nor has he temporarily and blissfully lost all sense of hearing after seeing Neil in concert eight glorious times, once driving 7 hours each way on a work night to do so; nor did he sing each of his safe-from-the-fire kids to psychedelic sleep every night of their childhoods with a steady diet of Powderfinger (my son always insisted the first line was "look out Momma, there's a white bird coming up the river"; if I sang boat instead of bird he'd sit up in bed, his doll Carson cradled in his arms, and howl in indignation), Lost in Space and Little Wing.

(By the way, that fire scenario really happened: long ago, when the kids were still little and there was no room whatsoever left in our tiny home, all my records were stored in a family cabin in the woods; one time I watched the backside of the ridge behind that cabin going up in flames and then rushed home to get everyone, and all of my Neil, into the car so we could get the hell out of there. Everyone/thing made it out just fine.)

In other words, Greg's not me. Plus, he grew up a Pearl Jam guy so we were listening to Mirror Ball as a common ground of sorts when the question, Why Neil Young?, was asked. At that point Neil was hollering about the place called downtown, where the hippies all go, so my first, slightly inebriated, explanation - "dude, I don't know, he's just the best" - didn't really fly. After all, the hippies were dancing the Charleston; they were doing the limbo.

Greg's question is a good one. What attribute can you insert after the statement "Neil Young is the best _____" that adequately describes his odd and supreme genius?

"Poet" doesn't work. Sure, Neil can write about roads stretching out like healthy veins and wild gift horses that strain the reins, but he can also dedicate a ten minute song entirely to describing one person's surplus of mashed potatoes.

Nor can you get away with "he's the best songwriter" when he's released at least 6 different versions of the song Dance, Dance, Dance and much of his oeuvre from the past 10 years spews hot, Promise of the Real sized chunks.

Even Neil's newest robot will probably concur: there isn't any single thing that Young is the stand-alone-best at. (Well, maybe he is the best at screaming into his guitar's pickups...)

And yet, for me, the truth has never been in doubt since I first heard Side 2 of On the Beach over thirty years ago: Neil Young is, and always will be, my favorite musician.

So I think it's about time this blog started wrestling with Neil "Shakey" Young himself. That's why I'm kicking off this weekend with the first of many Shakey Sundays: I'm gonna write about every one of Neil's studio albums, in order.

Those of you who only show up to see if I have more to say about John Darnielle's cooking skills: relax. I'll continue to post Dollar Bin posts on other artists alongside this new project. I promise. But be warned, Young currently has 45 studio albums to his name and I have a ton to say about all of them. So this will take awhile.

I'm not making any promises of the real here: I'll surely take some Sundays off, these posts will often appear, like this one, in truly Shakey fashion, on the wrong day of the week, and I may keel over or get a life before I ever write about Storytone or Fork in the Road. But it's time to give this Neil Young thing a shot, a shot that will ring all around the border, like a venom in the sky. Will we make it? Hey, who knows where or when. But let the Dollar Bin's Shakey Sundays begin.

Here we go:

Neil Young did not yet know how to be NEIL YOUNG in 1968. When putting together his debut solo album he:

Overdubbed instruments and vocals alike instead of leaving everything as live and raw as an octopus that's just been tossed up On The Beach;

Brought in ace session musicians and back up vocalists instead of the wandering cast of reckless, drunken fools who he's been working with ever since;

Boxed up (nearly) every raggedy edge of his sound into tiny, bite-sized morsels instead of pummeling us into submission;

Bounced around from one real studio to the next over three months instead of doing it all in a barn or in front of a crackling fire in the night;

Waffled between, and deferred to, three different producers instead of ordering everyone around like they were his private army of Jawas; and finally,

He recorded while sober.

And yet the end result is a lovely, under-appreciated record, one you're fairly likely to pick up in any Dollar Bin to this day. I suspect a lot of casual collectors have bought Neil Young in the last 55 years based on the twin false assumptions that Joni Mitchell painted the cover (she didn't) and that it'll sound, you know, like Heart of Gold. Lucky for you, those buyers listened to the album once, understood none of it, then chucked it. So go get it already.

I remember picking up my own copy for a buck or two. It was the summer of 1992 and I had a bus ticket to take me from my grandmother's house in North San Diego all the way to my buddy Ned's parent's house in Coronado. I was 16 and had the day off from my summer camp job. Every cent of my huge $46/week salary was in my pocket and I had zero bills to pay nor any responsibilities to speak of. That sounds so awesome.

Anyway, there I was on the bus, feeling groovy. I'm not too spontaneous a guy but I saw a record store along the way and got out; there was yet another shop across the street. Encinitas, CA, was a cool place to be 30+ years ago; today I'm sure those store fronts are both dedicated to the kind of high end vegan yoga wear I'd need to take out a home loan to get into. But oh boy, just imagine how good I'd look...

Neil Young was included in my Dollar Bin haul from that afternoon, as was Time Fades Away. Who knows what else; who knows why I remember any of this.

Then again, I know exactly why I remember this: it was one of the funnest days of my life. I showed up at Ned's a few hours later and showed off my new records to a pretty big swath of 16 year old boys. No one was impressed; at that point Neil's only real claim to fame with grungy white kids was that Sonic Youth had opened for Neil the previous year. No one really cared about Sonic Youth; they only cared that Nirvana had once opened for Sonic Youth.

Poor Kurt was still alive and well at that point; he was the most famous musician on the planet. Everyone wanted to talk about him, not speculate with me about the fact that one single song seemed to take up nearly all of Neil Young's B Side.

So, instead of talking about Shakey, we spent the rest of the day, and night, driving from one 7-11 to another all over San Diego county, hunting for the most mythical of Slurpee flavors: Cinnabomb. That's a quest that I suspect a lot of 16 year old boys could still passionately get behind. Sadly, we never found Cinnabomb, but I did learn how to jump out of Ned's Vanagon with everyone else at red lights and make a lap around the car while screaming.

Good times. No, Great Times.

At that point I liked Neil but was still a year away from lifelong devotion. In a future post about Weld (uh oh, maybe I will need to do all the live records too?) I'll describe what it was like seeing him live for the first time a year earlier; I think it permanently altered the shape of my face. But I was too young to really know it yet.

After 31 years of pretty regular listening to Neil's debut, I'd argue that it demonstrates just how many different paths were open to him as he transitioned away from what was essentially a big deal boy band, Buffalo Springfield.

Neil Young opens with The Emperor of Wyoming, one of the most unique tracks Young's ever produced. As the strings play toss with Neil's slick guitars, opening a comfortable prairie scene to the sun, the wind and to our cheerful gazing eyes, we're given the immediate sense that Young could have wound up becoming a proper musician: scoring films, producing for others, you know, making music for normal people.

Missing entirely from the track is any sense of underlying menace, and menace is always a hallmark of Young's best work. Rather, it sounds as though the fine people of Wyoming are all holding hands and working together to build their Emperor a lovely barn, a barn no one will ever convert into a recording studio. Rather, everyone will have access; the people's grain will be safe and the Emperor will bestow handfuls of flowers upon every last one.

It's an instrumental track, and how many of those are on all 45 of Neil's albums? There's all of Dead Man, of course, but that's a soundtrack album. Side 2 of Neil Young opens with another instrumental, as well, one that he seemingly had absolutely nothing to do with. And I think that's it! Neil put this great track together, then never made music like this ever again. Wow.

But there's a back story of course: I think The Emperor of Wyoming is a sequel of sorts to a track Young didn't release, in his classic, mercurial fashion, for another 40+ years. Take a listen to Slowly Burning, recorded under the Buffalo Springfield moniker a year earlier. In actuality it's Young in the studio with session musicians, teaching himself how to make beauty.

Next up on Neil Young is The Loner, and we start to hear the Neil Young we know. There's plenty of that menace I was talking about in the song's titular character: this guy is watching you, probably right now, and if you get off the train at your station alone, he'll know that you are.

But Neil wasn't ready to unleash such menace sonically: every sense of the chaos he'd tapped into on Mr Soul a year and half earlier is immediately strangled off on The Longer, leaving room for full strings. Young was ready to sing about creeps. But he had not yet decided to sound like one.

The drums suck on this track; the guy responsible would go off and found the band Poco, together with the album's primary bass player, Jim Messina, who is the sole member of Buffalo Springfield that Young welcomed into this project (and Messina was barely a member of the band, only playing on their last record). My famous brother will probably soon tell me that Poco is a a big deal band I ought to get into. He's wrong; I know this even though I have never listened to a Poco record; I simply have intuited that they are un poco terrible.

But back to Buffalo Springfield. I debated starting this entire project with their first record. After all, that's the first thing Neil properly released. That record is great for a lot of reasons. For one thing, it demonstrates that Stephen Stills, at least for a moment, didn't suck. But Neil Young is where we're starting!

The most important hold-over from the Springfield era on this record is producer and pianist Jack Nitzsche, one of Neil Young's three outside producers. Nitzsche is a figure of significant folklore: he's like Phil Spector's mini-me: almost as prolific, almost as genius, almost as nuts. There'll be more to say about Jack on future Shakey Sundays. For now, suffice it to say that he was once arrested for chasing his, and Neil's, former lady friend, Carrie Snodgrass, around her home with a handgun. And then, years later, he and Snodgrass got back together.

Nitzsche seems responsible for much of the greatness within the very best song on Neil Young, The Old Laughing Lady. Every version Neil's ever done of the song is wonderful. He hypnotized himself and every one else present with his coffee house version, busked it incognito on an Amsterdam street corner, rewrote it almost entirely for his 76 acoustic tour, complete with train effects, and laid it down in isolated, after hours perfection during the credits of his otherwise dull concert film Heart of Gold. Next up I hope there's a children's choir involved, singing through his vocoder.

Neil Young's studio take of Old Laughing Lady is a masterpiece. Nitzsche's piano lines are subtle and deft; his production corrects the amateur flourishes that undercut the previous year's Broken Arrow: everything is dense and sparse at once, and the backing vocals, led by the incomparable Merry Clayton a year before she laid down some of the best vocals in any rock song ever on Gimme Shelter, are a surging, moaning pulse that's, once again, unlike anything else Neil would ever put on tape.

But arguably the best thing of all on the song is the bass line. Take a listen.

That's not Jim Messina. It's Carole Kaye, the only female member of Phil Spector's studio band, later known as The Wrecking Crew. Light years ahead of her time, Kaye is responsible for a bunch of the best notes in all the 60's. She's the bass player on Pet Sounds and Smile; her playing there reset the entire way Paul McCartney played bass. She's on La Bamba, I Hear a Symphony and Love's Forever Changes, plus hundreds of other songs we all know from the late 50's and 60's.

So why don't we talk about her all the time? Sexism people, sexism. The poor woman was abused by her music teacher when she was 13 years old and wound up marrying him and having his child at age 16. Somehow she rose above this all and broke just about every barrier you can imagine in the studio. And good for her: she bailed on the whole hideous scene two years after playing on Neil Young. Now the internet is filled with sweet images of her like this one:

But why doesn't she play on all of Neil Young? After all, she was in the sessions a year earlier that produced Expecting to Fly and Slowly Burning.

I'm guessing that a) she was too expensive for Neil (she once claimed, without bravado, that she made more as a session musician than she would if she were President of the United States), and b) Neil was already realizing that he's happiest and most successful when surrounded by lesser musicians. No offense Jim Messina, but you didn't freak Neil out with your mad skills. Carole Kaye did.

Much of the rest of the album is filler, stuff Young wrote to flesh out the record and stuff he largely has not returned to since. But most of that filler is great.

Take I've Been Waiting For You. If you set aside Young's uptight, anodyne vocals and the fact that this song is little more than a chorus and a guitar riff, you'll discover that Neil was well on his way to Prince-like studio skills. He stacks up his own organ, piano and guitars atop drums that don't suck. The whole thing, even the unfunny Ha's! in the intro, swings.

But we've got to end this first Shakey Sunday by taking note of the most important relationship Young began during the record. Indeed he says it was one of the most important relationships in his entire life. Supposedly, Neil was hitchhiking in Topanga Canyon at some point in 68 when a guy even crazier than him, David Briggs, picked him up. I guess we'll buy into that story and wonder if we would have stopped for Neil in 1968. Before you jump to any conclusions, remember what he looked like at that point.

I don't know about you, but I'd have left his ass on the side of the road.

Briggs had no real qualifications for producing Young or anyone else at the time. But he quickly supplanted both Nitzsche and Ry Cooder in the production booth and helped Neil make more than half of Neil Young. Briggs had exactly what Neil was looking for at the time, and he's still looking for it now: sublime amateurism, both from himself and from his contributors.

Maybe Briggs taught Neil how to run around the car screaming at red lights during their first drive together; maybe not. But either way, he made Neil happy, and he started to get him truly comfortable in front of a microphone for the first time.

Thank God they found one another. Yes, some of what they made on Neil Young is mediocre for Young, and the album's never-ending final track, Last Trip To Tulsa, is one of my least favorite Neil Young songs (except when the Stray Gators are tearing it into wonderful pieces), but most of the best things we'll talk about in these upcoming posts came from the partnership between Young and Briggs.

And so I hope you're out there right now with a similarly sweet partner of any kind, digging your Shakey Sunday.

[third-arch]

My Trafalgar Law HC's!! pt.5 🤍🤍

He's never told/will tell anyone this, but he once cosplayed as Homura Akemi in his room. He thought he looked super cute (and he did)

He has a Raphtalia nenderoid. He has her on his desk. He doesn't make a big deal about it or acknowledge it, but it's super cute.

^^He's got one of these on his bed

This isn't really a HC, but he smells really nice. His entire place smells really good, too. Luffy really likes the smell of his car LOL and never let's him forget that.

I've mentioned this before kinda, but his comfort game is Deemo. He likes listening to the music from the game and putting it on while he works, now and then.

His favorite flavor of ice cream is plain vanilla. He can deal with chocolate chips, but he's pretty picky. If you give him a warm brownie alongside it tho, he'll be hooked.

His Genshin Impact team would be Albedo, Fischl, Yoimiya, and Xiao. He also ships Xiao and Venti. He mains as Albedo, but he also really likes Gorou, Barbara, and Chonghyun (it was his starting main).

He would never have Tiktok.

I've also mentioned one of these before, but he can play the piano and the ocarina really well. Also slightly cannon but he can sing very well.

He doesn't drink soda, but if he had to choose, he prefers regular Dr. Pepper.

If he was the reader, his favorite Straw Hat would be Nami, but he also likes Chopper, Corazon (in every HC in every timeline lol), and Ace.

He loves summer weather. He hates the snow.

He's very good at photography and likes going on walks now and then to take photos.

If you asked him what song he's been jamming to recently, he'd say Der Shelby pt.2-Hozier.

His favorite Victorious character is Jade West. He also likes Beck.

He'd own a dog, probably like a husky, golden retriever, or a samoyed. When he's a doctor, he'd own 4-5 dogs.

I really don't see him dating anyone unless they gave like sunshine/warm colored vibes. Ace or Luffy coded characters would probably have the best chemistry with him.

His favorite SpongeBob episodes are "Shanghaied", "Wet Painters", "Graveyard Shift", and "Dying for Pie".

If he could visit any place in America, he'd probably choose Yellowstone.

He'd cry for John Lennon if he visited the Dakota Apt.'s in New York.

He convinced Luffy that the Blair Witch Project was real.

He would be really good at Prop Hunt.

He is a very patient and safe driver.

Young Law HC's

This HC is kinda sad/sentimental, just a heads up.

I like to imagine if he grew up in the Modern World, he'd really like basketball. Corazon would save up the money to buy tickets to basketball games, and would take Law. Corazon is overall just the best most wholesome awesome Dad ever in my HC. He's doing his best. He'd show up to the Father's, Grandparent's, and Mother's day events at his school to make sure he wasn't alone. If he couldn't make it, he'd have one of his marine buddies go. He'd get Law happy meals and buy him ice cream. He'd have an album full of polaroids with him and Corazon.

This one's kinda sad but I feel like he'd be a really lonely kid throughout elementary school. He'd be really unpopular, but would be seen as "Quiet and Smart, and kinda intimidating". He'd watch Ace play basketball and eventually join him, and get sad when he graduates to highschool. He'd be really lonely and listen to music during lunchtime at a table by himself. He'd eventually have a friend group, but he'd still have issues with depression. He'd also be really good at art, but never pursue it. Teachers would think he's a very bright individual and is very polite, but very quiet.

For his birthday, he'd ask for comic books, robot figures, and a new pair of sneakers.

He'd love Radiohead. This is a bit biased, but his favorite song would be "No Surprises-Radiohead".

He'd also really like the Beatles. John would be his favorite member. He'd 100% have a Beatles poster in his room.

I don't wanna make the HC more angsty, but Corazon would make sure he goes to therapy.

He really likes dogs. He'd like animals in general. Corazon would take him to the zoo, and they'd look at the penguins and the petting zoo.

[thehairpindrop-13]

Lately I’ve reflected on my adoration for @taylorswift when I was a kid. I was born in 2001 which made me 5 when her first big time album Debut was released.

By the time I was 6 I was singing along to tear drops on my guitar and shouldve said no like it was nobody’s business. However it wasn’t until I was 7 or 8 when my favorite song of all time became my personal anthem for years.

You Belong With Me was and has always been my go to jam especially when I’m having an anxious day. As a kid I always felt like an outsider. I didn’t have many friends I could rely on, I dressed differently, I thought differently, and I was very sensitive to that.

This song became something I would scream at the top of my lungs hoping anyone would listen. That was the moment I realized that although Taylor Swift didn’t know me, and might never know me— she knew what it was like to be that girl. The one who was awkward and different and too kind and innocent and naive for her own good.

I grew up feeling like I wasn’t normal or good enough but songs like You Belong With Me really gave me a sense of belonging and pride.

After that, it was history. RED was my first big concert at METLife stadium. Reputation re-ignited my love for Taylor Swift (digging me out of the trenches of my screamo emo phase)

And now as a grown ass woman the Eras Tour has brought me back to the girl I once was. I mean if you asked 12 year old me if I’d go see my favorite artist with a best friend that I love I’d say you’re kidding!! As dramatic and crazy as it may sound @taylorswift helped heal my inner child.

She grew with me. Her music has a genre and sound and feeling for every moment of my life and I really think that is something so special.

If there’s anything I can give back to her it’s a big ol’ hug, a box of homemade chocolate chip cookies, and my undying love for her and her music.

She’ll never see this but…Thank you for changing my life Taylor—you fucking rock so hard.

In honor of the nostalgia of it all I’m linking a Spotify playlist with all my favorite songs from when I was a kid!

[characteroulette]

DIRECTOR'S CUT! give me the rundown on Lemon Boy!

Oh god uhh. That is three whole chapters lol it's gonna be a bit long oof

Okay so like. The concept started from this Cavetown Album (called Lemon Boy, fittingly) and me singing Lemon Boy to myself one day and going, "huh. Apollo and Snufkin both fit this song. I should do something with that." (I pretty easily spiraled into shipping the two help)

I wanna be ten feet tall!! I wanna grow big red horns!! I wanna eat fire and snow!! And scare everyone!!

Uhh yeah go listen to Ten Feet Tall it's a good song. Very Apollo vibes.

(I love to write to music, if you couldn't tell. Sprinkling in the motifs or imagery of them is like my fave thing to do it's so much fun.)

It is very important to me that you understand that Apollo's love language is to shove. This is my headcanon and I will go to the grave pushing this agenda. XD

The concept of Apollo tracking down one of his old foster caretakers was actually something I came up with while jamming out a different story with Tega. It was a nice little heartbreaking thing to include in Apollo's backstory and so I put it here. Shit's fucked, my boy, I'm sorry.

(Maple and Ginger were purely named for food. Also lesbian couple because idk I will also die on this hill that Apollo is gay and had a lot of gay in his life.)

I am pushing an Agenda and y'all will have to live with it. XD

But for real, I just like the concept of a young Snufkin, not really knowing any other way to console his friend, kissing him first and explaining it after. Snufkin and Apollo can understand each other in a way not a lot of the other kids around them could, so of course they'd also have a bit of a different relationship than those others.

This was also a good setup for the final chapter but it's really the entire reason I wrote this fic, I wanted this scene where Snufkin kisses Apollo and then Apollo pays it forward later in his life.

so uh I wrote the Clay chapter *after* finishing the first and last chapters!! I was originally just not gonna include a Clay segment (he was giving me too much trouble), but then I had a burst of inspiration and slammed it out so hey Clay gets to be in this lol.

Also furthering my Apollo will bite agenda. I love the idea of Apollo not actually getting bullied because he fought back, but getting ignored and avoided actually because, again, he fought back. I think it fits his character pretty well to have that in his background, considering how desperate he is for validation.

Clay is also weird to me. Like, he's such a blank slate for characterisation that I end up not knowing what to do with him half the time and that kinda makes him boring to me. He's only fun because *I* made him fun, which can be nice but like. The Ace Attorney roster is filled with too many good characters for him to stand out at all. Dual Destinies made Clay an important fixture in Apollo's backstory, though, so fuck me I guess.

Finally, Klavier chapter!! I got to start off with Apollo just buying the concert tickets Klavier sent, which as you know is my favourite little detail. Klavier sending these tickets is such an unhinged move but Apollo then buying them without a second thought is just as unhinged, these two are dumbasses and perfect for one another. XD

IT'S ME I'M STILL MAD ABOUT THIS. Phoenix goddamn Wright you cannot make Apollo present two (two!!) pieces of forged evidence and then never apologise for it!!! And then Spirit of Justice rolls around with Dhurke's whole deal and!!! Makes everything worse!!!

I have a whole ten or so rants about how AJ's ending is made worse actually by SoJ's inclusion (because how could Apollo be "too new" to law when he grew up with a literal disgraced defence attorney?? How could he have nothing to say on the poisoned system when he's known Dhurke and Khura'in's whole deal for all his life??? I'm upsetti I am so upsetti about this) but I'll save that for another time >T

I just really like this bit. Absolutely added this scene it does not exist in canon, but. I like Apollo's last line. Maybe one day you won't be such a coward, Klavier. Maybe one day you'll stop running from the truth.

And agh. The whole conversation scene in the lobby is just. Catharsis but not. I ended up playing the comfortable-but-also-not mood the two got stuck in, Apollo reaching out and Klavier dodging his advances (like the coward he is lol) until Klavier finally does accept that offer. I just like their dynamic, two men touched by ruin and reacting to it in vastly different ways. Klavier runs until he sees someone else in need and Apollo reaches out against all of his better instincts. They're my faves <3

*screaming from the rooftops* IT'S ABOUT TRUST!! IT'S ABOUT TRUSTING SOMEONE WHOM YOU SHOULD ABSOLUTELY UNDER NORMAL CIRCUMSTANCES NEVER THINK ABOUT TRUSTING!!! BUT YOU TRUST THEM ANYWAY!! AND THEY TRUST YOU IN RETURN!!! agh

I like the whole scene of them talking outside the car (and fun fact, I have an actual location in mind for them to be at; it's near the Conejo Boulders, which isn't LA whoops but is a view ingrained into my mind), but particularly this bit (of course) --

YEAH KISS!! it's a parallel (or rhyme??) to the one Snufkin gave him in the first chapter!! It's Apollo internalizing that lesson and paying it forward!! Yeah.

The end bit is funny specifically to me. Like yeah Apollo just spent a whole day making out and talking with Klavier and only when Klavier is like, taking care of him (making breakfast) does Apollo go "oh. Shit. I might desire this man romantically." Like lol amazing my fave. XD

ANYWAY YEAH LEMON BOY. I LIKE IT. At some point I'll finish the two sequel stories I've got in the works....

[falsegoodnight]

a new header??? it matches better <3 these are the fics I read or reread and enjoyed this month! like last time, i’m separating it into different sections: main list, wips, and non-1d. rereads will be included in the main list and marked with a star (*). 

*note: this list encompasses the fics i’ve read from the 1st to the 28th only

—

main list ~

✰ Don’t Wait Up by reliablyimperfect | NR | 1k

Without Harry’s warmth next to him, he felt the chill of the air creep over his skin. He tugged the blanket down from where Harry kept one draped over the back of the couch for him, grateful. With the blanket, he instantly felt warmer, but it backfired when his eyes began to droop again. Trying to keep his eyes open was impossible, and he was consciously aware of how long his blinks were becoming. They stay closed longer and longer until, eventually, they didn’t open again.

so soft and sweet and lovely! made my heart feel so warm <3 will return to this for some quick comfort in the future!

✰ my ugly mouth kept running by @hadestyles | E | 4k

Sometimes second chances are more important than the first.

rori’s lush writing + abo + exes to lovers = absolute perfection. my fic cameo gives it a bonus too :’) definitely one of my rori favs 

✰ i’ve loved you three summers now honey, i want them all by @softloubabie | M | 4k

The restaurant was small and bright, soft colors filled the walls and tables and fairy lights hung from everywhere. From what Harry had read, the food wasn’t overly expensive but it was still comparable to what you would get at one of the more expensive places. If Harry could he would take Louis to the biggest most expensive and extravagant restaurants to do what he planned to tonight, but this would do.

After being led to their table Harry nervously tapped his jacket pocket, sighing in relief when he felt the small box still there. Tonight was the night. He couldn’t wait till it was time to surprise Louis with all the gifts he got for him. Then finally the big surprise.

so cute and sweet! their kids were so adorable and the proposal so lovely!! they love each other so much <3

✰ love me in between the future and the past by navigator & quitter | E | 11k

Harry's scared of history repeating itself.

this honestly hurt to read but in such a raw and emotional way?? was mad at harry and then sad for him :( this writer duo’s fics never fail to amaze me!

✰ sunshine on my mind by @raspberryoatss | E | 13k

Louis visits Harry in Portland

this was so sweet and lovely! the perfect addition to this wonderful universe! pip’s characterizations and fluff never fails to make my heart feel warm <3

✰ rapture in the dark by @stylinsonsupporter | T | 13k

Harry Styles is a breakout musician who has shed his boyband label in favor of embracing his inner brooding rockstar. His PR team think that his rebrand is the perfect time for Harry to come out of the closet and have devised the perfect plan for doing so. Enter Louis Tomlinson, up and coming (and very openly homosexual) model whose public image as America's Sweetheart is the perfect foil for Harry's new edge. From a PR standpoint, it's a dream come true - a power couple that can slowly coax the public into accepting Harry's altered image. The only problem? They hate each other.

always love a good fake dating au and this is no exception! and model louis >> really enjoyed this!

✰ Maybe, Baby* by thoughtsickles | M | 16k | mpreg

It all feels too easy, too good to be true. It all feels like a scene from Louis' daydreams, the kind of life he'd always imagined he'd have when he was younger and bored at his momma's work, sneaking around the hallways of the maternity ward until the nurses let him in to hold the babies. He'd felt so important being allowed to touch them. He'd told them stories of the lives they were going to have, houses with nice wallpaper that wasn't peeling, yards filled with sunshine and flowers and grass that never went yellow. A hammock to nap in, cuddled up with his husband.

You can't stay here, he tells himself, but Baby doesn't want to listen.

have reread this one quite a bit of times now and it still makes me so happy <3 this Louis and Harry deserve the world <333

✰ Let Me Inside by reliablyimperfect | E | 18k

Louis is Harry’s boss, but Harry is the boss of Louis. 

loved this one! really enjoyed the balance between h&l and how they maintained their dynamic in subtle ways outside of the bedroom while also keeping it separate. very much enjoyed the jealousy as well <3

✰ a scintilla of predilection by @dehydratedpoolfics | T | 20k

There, in the far back of the room, next to the only available seat left, is none other than Harry Styles. Harry, who grew up next door to him, who knew all his secrets as a child and played FIFA with him on Saturday mornings after he would spend the night Friday evenings every week, whose curly hair would tickle his nose as they held each other during bitter cold nights that made his room glow a haunting blue.

love ex-childhood friends with misunderstandings!! louis was so cute and i loved his poetry <3 harry too was so stupid but so smitten and lovely :’) really enjoyed this!

✰ Keeping The Flame Alive by @crazyupsetter​ | E | 20k

Recording with One Direction never felt like this. There’s a couple reasons for that, Harry thinks. One is that they did most of their recording on the road, rushed and in busses and hotel rooms, never in one place long enough to really get an argument going. The other, larger and more important one, is that back then he had the sweetest, meanest little omega around to distract him from all of that frustration.

The first time around, when he’d been recording his debut solo album, it hit him pretty hard. He likes to think he’s better adjusted to it now, but frustration is warring under his skin nonetheless. He doesn’t want to be told what to do most of the time, and he especially doesn’t want to be told what to do when it comes to his music.

What he does want right now is that sweet, mean little omega right in front of him with his mouth on Harry’s cock. Unfortunately, the best he’s got is his own hand and a shared toilet. So. That’s really not going to work.

✰ like it’s a game* by @soldouthaz | E | 32k

There is little Harry hates more than truth or dare.

And Louis.

queen of enemies to lovers! it’s been a while since i’ve reread this but too absolutely no surprise, it’s just as amazing as always <3 sarah never misses!

✰ Too Young To Know by @2tiedships2 | M | 35k

Harry doesn’t present as an alpha… until he does.

really enjoyed this as per usual! exes to lovers is my jam and the added angst of Louis dating someone else at the beginning... love <3

✰ Some Things Take Root* by  navigator & quitter | E | 50k

Louis' ex doesn't get jealous of anyone besides Harry. Harry helps Louis use that to his advantage.

stumbled upon this randomly and decided to reread on a whim... ended up staying up to read it in one sitting! so good!

✰ Safe and Sound (You’ll Always Be) by @all-these-larrythings | E | 58k

When a failed case and a guilty conscience leaves Harry more than a little lost, his boss presents him with a new, less taxing assignment to help him cope. An escape from all the madness is just what Harry needs to get his life back on track. It's just too bad his new client has a grin like the devil, a pair of electric eyes that Harry simply can't get over, and no intention whatsoever of letting him catch a break.

i don’t know how i’ve never read this before??? it was absolutely amazing though! perfect blend of humor and fluff and tension and angst <3

✰ Mind Over Matter (You Under Me) by @youreyesonlarry | E | 74k

It’s dark outside when Harry finishes practice for the day. 

the slow burn in this fic killed me - which is to say, it was perfect! loved how they progressed from working together to being friends to something more and how much they genuinely cared for each other! the hockey was so fun too!

✰ Call Out My Name by frenchkiss | E | 102k

Apparently, it's bad PR to fall in love with the omega you hired to help you through your rut.

Harry Styles begs to differ.

ellen truly knocked it out of the park with this one!! had everything i could ever want: abo, famous/non-famous, fluff, humor, angst, drama, and more! i loved it from beginning to end!

wips ~

✰ ‘cause all our tomorrows lead the way by @loubellies | E | 64k | 7/11

So maybe Louis’ in over his head.

He had signed up for the Bachelor on a whim after his second bottle of wine and well, here he is. He’s just been announced as the twenty-sixth Bachelor and his ass is sweating. Like, literally sweating. He’s positive that if he was to turn around, the entirety of Bachelor Nation would get a nice peek of his ass sweat.

am thoroughly enjoying each chapter!! it’s been a wild ride so far and although things are currently calm, i am still on edge!! but i trust mar with my life <3

✰ Truth Behind Golden Eyes by @lwtisloved | E | 83k | 8/16 

Louis is a royal servant born with magic in a kingdom where his sole existence is outlawed with a war he has no idea he has a part in upon him. Harry is the prince on whom the burden of mending a broken kingdom falls upon and he might be willing to risk it all for a simple servant if only he admitted it to himself.

caught up last night! still really enjoying every chapter and can’t wait to see what happens next!! things are *happening* with h&l and answers are being given!! (love the jealousy too!)

non-1d ~

✰ Keep Me Close (I Need Your Faith) by @princelouisau | E | 23k

Somewhere along the way he had fallen in love and in doing so, had broken the one rule he knew he couldn’t come back from. As quickly as he realised, he decided that he must never dare speak it. He resigned himself to loving Draco in silence.

first foray into reading drarry... and, to no one’s surprise, i loved it! beautiful writing as always and beautiful atmosphere! it’s really not a shock that i fell for these characters and their story when danielle is behind it <3 it had me entranced from beginning to end!!

finally, i myself actually posted a fic this month:

my fics ~

✰ yesterday came suddenly by me | E | 49k | mpreg 

Harry the deadliest member of the NYC assassins’ guild, is forced to face a seemingly impossible task in hopes of finally leaving the underground behind for good, but when ghosts from the past come back to haunt him, escaping the darkness becomes that much harder.

If you read any of these beautiful works of art, remember to leave kudos and comment to show your appreciation!

*if i made any errors, please let me know :)

enjoy!

[kimberly-spirits13]

Random Characters with Singer S/O HC (...cause I can...):

Characters: Dick Grayson (YJ Robin), Tim Drake, Damian Wayne, Bart Allen, Garfield Logan (YJ), Kon Kent (90’s), Random One (Batsib)

Dick Grayson (YJ Robin):

·      You were John Constantine’s apprentice and daughter

·      Since it’s cannon that he was in a band, imma say it, you can probably sing

·      You grew up searching the world for your father since you were raised some by your mother until you fled her (demon mom) and ended up searching the world and practicing your magic with people that knew who you were based on your parents

·      You gained skills playing all sorts of things

·      The first time that John heard you was in your bedroom listening to music

·      Well he thought you were listening to music

·      You were actually playing guitar and singing

·      He was shocked and eventually you got to show him all of the songs you were actually playing guitar in

·      He took you to a recording studio one day for the hell of it and BOOM

·      You were off

·      Now about the team, you wore a mask just because of who you were

·      It was technically a magic mask and just kind of like a mind blur thing where if people already knew both sides of you, they’d know who you are but if it was someone new, they would just know you by your hero name

·      Pretty practical

·      So, when you had gotten big, you made sure not to sing or do anything that would give it off

·      But one day when you thought that the cave was empty, you had an idea for a song and just sang it into your phone

·      Then you started singing one of your own songs while making lunch cause you were bored

·      Robin heard

·      “Wait... WAIT”

·      You had that look that John does when he wants to roll his eyes and throw his head back in exasperation but if he did he’d die

·      “bullocks.” That was all that came out of your mouth

·      You told him, he knew, it was kind of just a thing

·      Now once you guys were dating, and even before, he’d go to every. single. concert (that you played near Gotham or where he was at least)

·      Loudest in the crowd

·      Got VIP seating

·      He’d be the one that knew ALL of the lyrics

·      Definitely not because he was a big fan before he knew .... oh no... “totally not”

·      He’s your date to every single event

·      Interviews together

·      When he takes you to galas, you’re both outshining everyone

·      You let him listen to every single song that you put on albums first since it’s important

·      John got jealous over that

·      Dick knows that some of the pyro that you have at shows is actually magic and that’s why it’s so cool

·      If there’s anything that’s like a hologram that flies over the crowd, he knows that that’s you

·      I think as a given, everyone in this wears your merch even if it’s a bit

·      If I say anything about it it’s cause they wear it a lot

Tim Drake:

·      You two met at one of your own concerts

·      You were on tour and he got a VIP meet and greet pass

·      He was so nervous but really excited at the same time cause he didn’t want to screw up and look like an idiot

·      You two talked longer than you were supposed to actually

·      In the end, the two of you managed to exchange numbers

·      He almost died

·      When he got home he was smiling so wide Dick had to know what happened

·      Even Bruce commented on it

·      Dick squealed when he found out

·      BIGGGG time

·      You and Tim immediately started texting back and forth

·      First of all, you texted first since Tim was too nervous he’d bother you

·      You didn’t really know where to start so you guys just talked

·      That night you just knew this was going to be something good

·      You kept the relationship under wraps for a few months

·      Not until the two of you were comfortable with everything

·      Eventually, you went out for a gala and the media was blowing up

·      It was like an explosion

·      Tim was hesitant to take you to meet his family but you all got along very well

·      Even you and Damian

·      He complimented your skill

·      Everyone almost fell over dead

·      He loves to listen to your music

·      You are both up at inhuman hours working

·      Tim likes to have you by humming or quietly singing to something in your earbuds

·      Sometimes you’ll just interrupt the silence and ask if a line sounds good

·      He almost always says yes and if he doesn’t, he gives a suggestion on a change

·      He’ll come and watch videos be filmed which is always cool to him

·      Comes to every show

·      You guys hate being far away from each other for too long anyways

·      Eventually, you’ll get a penthouse in Gotham and move in together

·      Has the best security just in-case

·      It also has a recording studio built in

·      It isn’t uncommon for one of his brothers to drop in

·      He is always a blushing mess when a song is about him

·      It’s pretty funny to you

·      Likes to listen to you play an acoustic version

·      Those are his favorite no matter how much he likes the original

·      He will also help you pick out singles

·      Sometimes if you’re playing one he’ll just stop and say single and you know what he means

·      One time you were at the studio and doing a soundtrack song for a movie with another singer and the two of you killed it

·      The high notes were your best and Tim was floored

·      You laughed a ton at his reaction

·      “I didn’t know you could do that.”

���Surprise Timmy.”

·      You have sweatpants in your merch just because you know he’ll always wear them

·      You also have coffee mugs and tumblers because you know he’ll use them

Damian Wayne:

·      You both grew up in the LoA

·      You were his second hand from the start and also a top general

·      Got to leave to go on tons of missions

·      Before you’d leave, his only demand or request (after some time) was that you came back with a song that played from the outside

·      You always did

·      At night, you’d softly sing them on the rooftops looking out at the stars at night

·      He wouldn’t admit it but those were his favorite nights

·      After a mission, that was when the compound was attacked

·      You and Damian were swept off your feet

·      Into this new place with Bruce

·      You had learned to play piano very well so once you found that there was one, you were attached to it if it wasn’t training

·      Coping mechanism for you

·      Damian would hear it sometimes

·      Eventually you made your first record and skyrocketed

·      You were lo-key kind of terrified from the attention thinking it would get you killed somehow

·      Spoiler alert

·      It didn’t

·      Some of the songs you wrote were so sad and dark that in interviews when you’d be asked about it, you’d have to just straight up lie

·      You can’t just talk about being an assassin for your entire life and the repercussions of that

·      You’d say it was inspired by the moral compass of characters you read about

·      Damian knows what all of the songs are about since he grew up with you

·      In school, you got tons of attention and hated it

·      That was because you knew that none of those people were real

·      Not at all

·      When you and Damian went public a good percentage of the population at Gotham Academy was mad since they wanted to date you

·      Not for any reason but money a lot of the times of course

·      The press thought you two were really cute

·      You both also intimidated the hell out of everyone

·      No one really knew why it was just your demeanor

·      Late at night on the rooftops of the manor or even just the fields outside of Gotham is where you sing new songs to him

·      He loves it and admits it

·      You guys have the best conversations there

·      It’s something you look forward to every day

·      At shows, he sings along to the songs

·      When you wave to or wink at him he blushes and tries to hold in a smile but fails terribly

·      There’s always a video of it somewhere

·      If you get even a tiny bit of emotional on stage, he gets that way too

·      He understands all too well

·      Loves to go to the studio with you if you invite him

·      He says he likes every single song but you can tell which ones he likes best by his reactions

·      Those are a dead giveaway

·      If he gets that sad look, you know you’ve written a good song

·      If he gets a gleam in his eyes, you know you’ve written a good single or peppy song and it goes like that for everything

Bart Allen:

·      You met right before the Outsiders phase

·      Just joining the team, you were a seriously famous singer and a metahuman

·      Everyone knew since you were open about it

·      Bart thinks you’re really cool

·      Listens to your music all the time but will never admit it and if he’s caught especially by you, he’ll be an embarrassed mess

·      When you were dating it was pretty public

·      He loves going out with you and showing off

·      It’s just kind of his thing to do that

·      You always think it’s funny or you roll your eyes jokingly

·      Either way he will do it without fail

·      Goes to all of your shows

·      You know that one person at big concerts that are lit up in lights screaming the lyrics?

·      That’s Bart

·      You cannot change my mind otherwise

·      Will actively try and make you laugh onstage but not mess up

·      Oh no

·      He would never

·      Now he just openly jams out to your music which at first was kind of awkward walking into but you got used to it

·      He likes it when you just randomly start singing

·      When you two leave the base, you end up getting your own place pretty close to it

·      Just not too close

·      Team listening parties to new songs

·      Some are just really sad and no one has dry eyes since they might be about missions or the aftermath of them

·      Watching the number of buys just sky rocket on an album’s release day is the most fun

·      Once you hit every thousand or so it gets really fun

·      It’s like a race in the sense that everyone is just pumped and wants it to surpass the last number of buys and streams from your last album

·      If Lex or someone criticizes the Outsiders for whatever reason, your fans are on it like crazy

·      You started an organization and another safe house for meta teens

·      Helped give funds to add another wing to the Star Labs base for the kids

·      Everything got updated with that as well

·      Benefit concerts for them

·      Once the meta teens get a grip on their powers, they get free passes to the concerts and VIP passes

·      You also drop by often to hang out with them

Garfield Logan (YJ):

·      You had both known each other before Outsiders

·      You got along really well and were best friends

·      M shipped you guys along with everyone else and when that ship sailed, she was over the moon

·      Okay so when you got big, it was a bit before his acting career kicked off

·      The two of you paved the way for meta teens coming out as metas

·      It was a MASSIVE deal to have someone like you in the music industry and then Gar in the film world

·      Both go to award shows together

·      It’s pretty fun

·      When he decided that he wanted to cut back from acting more and more, you were supporting him through and through

·      He thinks that it’s cool that there are songs about it

·      They’re not too unobvious either

·      You have interviews together but have both decided that Grant is annoying and she is pretty obnoxious sometimes

·      Same with a lot of the other interviewers

·      They just want to know about EVERYTHING

·      No stone left unturned

·      You got to do music for one of the movies he was in which was really cool

·      You were both at the premier walking the carpet

·      Met galas anyone?

·      The public’s favorite couple of all time

·      There’s no doubt about it

·      You wear each other’s merch

Kon Kent (90’s):

·      You probably did more indie and alternative which he thought was really cool

·      You were one of the only newer artists that he really liked

·      One day you just run into each other

·      He doesn’t know what to do for a second cause internally, he’s freaking out

·      Eventually, you pull him into a different building to avoid the mob of people

·      Of course, people see but it didn’t headline the next day which was amazing

·      “Sorry about that. I just figure the mob of people and pap aren’t worth standing outside for.” You said looking outside from behind a shelf of the store.

“N-no, it’s fine.” He replied running a hand through his hair.

“Oh, you’re Superboy, I’m Y/N.”

“You can just call me Kon.”

·      While he was at it, he got your number too

·      You guys actually spent a decent amount of time talking in the store before leaving separately

·      He texted first telling you he liked the album that you had dropped

·      From there, after a few days he asked you out which you were totally down for

·      Then when everything went public, there was no breathing room if you left your place or any other private property

·      He would go to all of your shows and be hit on by the locals

·      Not your fans though

·      Ohhhhhhhhh no

·      You’d tease him about it sometimes but if you could tell he was just dying in the crowd because of girls or boys, you jokingly call it out from stage

·      Think Harry Styles kind of calling it out

·      It’s those vibes and attitude

·      SOMETIMES he might loudly call a thank you or something funny that makes everyone laugh

·      Then the show goes on as normal

·      He sits in your dressing room during meet and greets most of the time

·      You’ve got his favorite snacks in there because of this

·      When you go to events like the Grammys or Teen Choice, you take over the red carpet

·      Everyone goes wild

·      It’s kind of nerve wracking but easier when he’s having to go through the same deal lol

·      The couple that wears disguises sometimes

·      It’s nothing too big, it is enough however

·      He teases you if you wear a wig or something

·      Vacations with no press or anything are amazing

·      They also keep you sane

·      Wears your merch

Random One (Batsib):

·      Your entire family is on board with this

·      They support you throughout the entire thing

·      You have a hit debut album and tour for the next one

·      Eventually, Bruce will let you homeschool which is amazing for you since the people at Gotham Academy know no limits to weird

·      Someone literally tried to ghost write a song for you and then stuffed it into your locker before you were there

·      You knew immediately

·      It’s not that hard

·      During interviews they’re in the background as moral support

·      Extra attention from press at galas

·      Thankfully not really the old rich people though

·      Bruce and the entire family wear your merch

·      You have coffee mugs just for Timmy

·      Dick and the girls wear the merch the most

·      Steph and Cass are squealing if you win an award or drop anything

·      They and your oldest brother are publicly your biggest fans

·      Bruce is secretly your number 1 fan though

·      Plays the songs at the watchtower when he’s working sometimes

·      You know this

·      Everyone does

·      It just happens and you’re not complaining

·      Especially when Billy Batson found out about you

·      Part of Batman’s group AND a superstar

·      You do still typically do the vigilante thing but not as much on tour

·      It’s hard since you actively are trying NOT to die even harder since you kind of are a world -wide sensation

·      On tours, your family is the LOUDEST group in the crowd

·      No doubt

·      They try and make you laugh on stage

·      When you do, you’ll call them for it sometimes

·      *Brothers yelling something at the stage when you respond trying to roast you*

·      “That’s pretty rich coming from batarang ass lookin hairline over there.”

·      Or it might be something like, “Wait, what did you say? Sorry I can’t hear you over the 15,000 other people that are here watching my show.”

·      Those are the best moments

·      Hands down

·      If anyone goes after you on Twitter or something, they’re goners

·      They’re going to have a million other Batfam members and even leaguers coming for them

·      It’s pretty hilarious to see Clark Kent write an editorial on why a person was wrong and why your album was superior to all

·      Wonder Woman saying she listened to your music

·      *passes out*

·      Not that you didn’t already, know, you were just in awe of her lol

[queen-of-my-goofball-army]

Why YOU should give Rush a chance

Okay, so right off the bat, this is not going to be like my other posts on my blog. This is not a post about some show that has captivated my interest or anything at all related to animation. If that's not your cup of Dot rambling coffee, than I would highly recommend you take your L right now and come back for your regularly scheduled programming in a few days.

Are they gone? Okay cool! For those of you that stuck around past my forewarning let me tell you about my newest special interest to join my now growing music love affair with 80's and 90's Rock n Roll. For those of you that don't know, I'm guessing that most of you do not know what Rush even is. If you are not somehow on the autism spectrum or know a lot about music in general than this band will be entirely unknown to you. Rush is a three man progressive rock band born in Canada made up of three incredibly amazing men Gary "Geddy" Lee, his best friend since he was 11 years old Alex Lifeson, and last but most certainly not least, the amazingness that was Rush's drummer and songwriter Neil Peart. Together, the three of them changed the world of progressive rock through Geddy's unique vocal qualities, Alex's incredibly underrated shredding guitar skills, and Neil's immaculate drums and lyrics. I am here to tell you, yes YOU reading this length rambling message in three sections to keep this fair. Each member will get their own sections and I will try my hardest to keep personal bias out of this. I also just watched Rush: Beyond The Lighted Stage yesterday with my mom so I will mention some things that we talked about during it to try and sell people.

Geddy Lee:

* Geddy has one of the most unique voices in all of rock music. This will most likely be the thing that turns off the people that do listen to me and wind up listening to a couple of songs. He has had a lot of critics for his higher pitched voice usually yelling lyrics. However, I love his singing voice. It is filled with energy and power to it. His voice has a weight to it that not a whole lot of other people can really nail if they really want to.

* You want to talk about sheer talent? How many of you all know lead singers that are a one and done kind of singer? They can play one instrument and they're done? Well shove them aside because Geddy can play not only bass guitar but a double neck bass, synthesizer, and piano. Yeah I think all you haters can stand aside because this man will always be amazing technically.

* So many of lead singers in my opinion, think that they own the band. Because they get to sing the songs right? That means that they get to make all the important decisions and they can't ever do anything wrong. Well for those of you that know Rush, you will remember the synthesizer era. The era of new wave Rush where Geddy shelved his bass guitars for his synthesizer. This caused a small rift between Lee, Lifeson, and Peart who were not at all fans of the way that the synthesizer was going. While Geddy was having a fun time with it, he shelved the synthesizer almost for good and went back to his roots. I don't know many other lead singers that would put up something that they were legitimately having a good time with just for his bandmates.

* Geddy's just general goofball personality is something that continues to make me chuckle. Since he and Alex have known each other for practically ever (they met when they were 11) and have been there for each other for most of their lives they have very similar energy's.

Alex Lifeson:

* Alex Lifeson is an underrated guitarist. There I said it. I feel like of the three of them (Geddy, Alex, and Neil) Alex gets talked about the least due to the fact that Geddy also plays guitar. While it might be a different brand of guitar some people forget just how genuinely face melting his solos are. I could listen to his riff in Tom Sawyer all day long I swear. I'm still working my way through every Rush album in chronological order (I'm just now finishing A Farewell To Kings an absolutely beautiful album.) But his skills are not one to be downsized and I think he is an amazing, amazing guitar player.

* You want to talk about the group goofball? If Geddy is goofy, you look in the dictionary this man is the pure definition of a hilarious and quirky character. When Rush was FINALLY indicted into the Rock N'Roll hall of fame in 2013, after Neil and Geddy's beautiful and moving speech's about how important this means to them, Alex gets up there and his entire speech is spoken in very animated BLAHs. But what's really funny is that if you watch carefully he is actually trying to tell you a story. It's a story about how they all got there past the critics that tried to stop them along the way.

* I love the relationship between Alex and Geddy especially. They're just both such unique kinds of people but they have similar quirks and traits that are evidence of decades upon decades of friendship. I get massive big bro vibes from watching the three of them play together and it's really touching that they never let the fame go to their heads.

* While watching the documentary, I found myself in awe of just his general personality. He was a jokester and the life of the party, and even if sometimes Neil was exhausted by his presence it was obvious that he loved his bros.

Neil Peart:

* If you are asking me, the heart and soul of Rush, was their drummer Neil Peart. Neil wasn't just their drummer though, he also wrote all of Rush's songs after their first album together. Neil grew up probably the biggest bookworm to ever bookworm. He was a socially awkward kid it seemed since he was always reading as his parents explained in the documentary (more on this laster). This resulted in lyrics that are absolutely gorgeous in any context and sound like literature themselves. One of my favorite Rush songs is their song Rivendale themed to Lord Of The Rings.

* Peart was one of the most technically amazing drummers of all time. I don't think I'm saying new information when I say that. He has been praised for not only his technical prowess but the intensity of how he played as well. He was a force of nature when you put him in front of a drum kit. The drum solos in Rush are not easy. They are technically extremely difficult and always leave me to collect my jaw from the floor.

* Lyrically speaking, his lyrics were so intelligent and beautifully worded that it's hard to focus on them sometimes. I've listened to Fly By Night I can't tell you how many times just within the last few months. They are so unique, so beautiful, just so Rush. I can't think of any other word to describe them other than Rush. Nobody else could have written lyrics like these other than Neil himself. Even though he's gone now (Rest In Power you absolute Mad Lad.) I still feel like his music will resonate with millions of future generations to come. It could be the year 3000 for all I care and people will still be jamming to Tom Swayer, just you watch.

* Lastly about Neil himself, this is of the opinion of my mom and I, and you heard it here first, I think that Neil was aspie. He was the quietest of the three of them, he hated getting spotted by fans while the other two seem to tolerate it, he was constantly stimming with his drumsticks on and off the stage by spinning them around his fingers, he was totally nerdy and antisocial, he loved literature more than anything else growing up and would rather have a book in his hands than go out to a public place with his classmates, and he grieved in a different way than most people do. When his wife and daughter passed away, he hit the road with his motorcycle and most often Geddy and Alex wouldn't hear from him for months at a time. They had cute little nicknames for each other that Neil would always sign the postcards with. It was a different one every single time.

Thanks for listening to me ramble on this day guys! I really appreciate it, I know that this hasn't been your regularly schedule Dot programming but I really appreciate you sticking around! Give Rush a listen to if I've piqued your interest you will not regret it.

[cloudstation]

scrawlers replied to your post: @ anyone who wants to answer this: what was the...

TRAGIC KINGDOM IS SUCH A GOOD ALBUM THO, MY ALL-TIME FAVE NO DOUBT SONG IS ON THAT ONE

what song?? that album has so many good tunes

[earthstellar]

The Most 80s Cartoon Theme Songs Ever: Guitars, Synth, Emotional Lead Singers, Robot Voices

Now, I know this is on my Transformers blog, and I already made a whole big post about the objectively best Transformers theme songs here. 

But if you like the Transformers 80s rock/synth music, I have some classic 80s cartoon series songs that younger people out there might not even know about-- And they are absolutely the most radical 80s songs you will ever hear. 

You will either love these, or you will laugh extremely hard. I don’t know how anyone under 30 years old might react to these, but I want Gen Z to experience some of the sick jams I grew up with, so here you go!  

1) MASK Theme Song: If GI Joe and Transformers Were The Same Show

If you follow me for Transformers: This show is what would happen if a bunch of bots used their holoforms to do a GI Joe adventure while driving around in a bunch of weird Combiner alt-mode vehicles. 

Check that out. It’s a 50s Cadillac painted like a flaming hot rod with triplicate tires and a rotating tank turret. Look at how much ass that kicks.  

MASK was about being rad, using cars and trucks that had a bunch of really goofy nonsense like laser beam headlights to fight the Bad Guys, who were mostly B-list GI Joe villains. This show is fondly remembered because it was fun and silly with some pretty cool design ideas and toys, and that’s all it needed to be. MASK was pretty great! 

Best Elements of the Song: The song opens with soft synth keyboard, then kicks off into guitar and a heavy synth robot voice accompanied by a super passionate dude absolutely invested in singing about “always riding hard on Venom’s trail” (you can decide if it’s gay or not, personally I remember fanfiction about this series that was actually pretty good), before an excellent guitar solo that melts into a synth duet and a last round of vocals to close out the track. 

Worst Elements of the Song: The lyrics are horrendous. You will either love how much of a jam this is anyway, or you’ll laugh at it because it’s so cheesy. Either way, it is still actually a great track, so give it a listen if you’ve never heard it before! 

2) Jayce and the Wheeled Warriors: You’ve Probably Never Heard of This Show Because it was Made by French Canadians 

If you follow me for Transformers: This show is what happens when Whirl spikes all the drinks in Swerve’s and 

There’s a space outlaws themed episode where the above character uses her bisexual mullet and shoulder pads made of steel to defend her title as the space pirate queen. Please watch this show.

This show has everything, from multiple characters with mullets, a character who is a cross between Han Solo and Bender from The Breakfast Club, a space wizard, a magical Captain Planet space magic ring, space pirates, space vehicles of all kinds, surprisingly solid animation, and overall a really fun vibe. The character designs are really interesting, and it’s a shame this show isn’t more widely known. The famous J M Straczynski (look up everything he’s worked on and have your mind blown) worked on this show as well! 

Best Elements of the Song: The track opens with the opening narration from the show, and immediately kicks off: “There’s a power that comes from deep inside of you, every day you’re reachin’ towards the light! And you know there’s a long long way ahead of you, but when your wheels get you there-- Things will turn out right! ” Absolutely great vocals accompanied by synth beats and hair metal guitar which goes into a vocal chorus, ending with an emphasis on the solid vocals for impact. 

Worst Elements of the Song: It’s hard to find a full length version of the track. The one I linked above is still the TV edit of the theme.

3) The Real Ghostbusters - Hometown Hero: I Really Miss Cartoons With Synth Music

Honestly, the whole album is worth a listen, this is 80s gold. 

This show was one of the biggest hits of the 80s. I had an Egon Spengler blue Ghostbusting jumpsuit, and this is the show I remember most fondly. 

You knew shit was real when you got the frontal proton-guns-out group pan shot.

Now, you might laugh, younger people, but The Real Ghostbusters actually had some of the best writing of any animated show at the time, and it still holds up today. (I recently re-watched it, and I was impressed at how good it still is.) It was unreal how great and how adult the first two seasons were, especially. Janine was the coolest, most stylish, fiercest lady in cartoons. (I had a crush on her for years as a kid.) 

It’s also probably one of the few 80s cartoons that is entirely watchable in the current day. The dialogue is genuinely funny, and the show gets deeply emotional at times, in very effective and real-feeling ways. You will cry when things get serious. You get entirely invested in what’s going on, no matter how wild or bizarre. The creature designs were amazing, and the animation was solid. This show was above and beyond in terms of overall quality, and the music matches.

Best Elements of the Song: I do recommend you listen to the whole album, because each song is very distinct and extremely 80s. The one I linked above, Hometown Hero, was made for a specific episode in which Ray returns to his hometown to bust a ghost that a family friend has requested the Ghostbusters help out with. However, Ray is afraid that people will think his career is silly or that people might be disappointed in him not having a more traditional job, so he’s nervous. However, when they get there (after lots of encouragement from the rest of the team), they successfully deal with the situation, and Ray’s courage is back! Cue the music! 

It’s a very uplifting song, and a pretty good episode, too. (There was lots of good episodes, but I recommend the first two seasons in their entirety. They’re all good episodes, no lie.) 

Worst Elements of the Song: Unfortunately this track ends eventually, but there is an entire album for this series, including one of the best Halloween themed bops I’ve ever heard, which you can enjoy here. 

This post is pretty long already, but if you want to hear more 80s cartoon jams, let me know and I’ll share the objectively best ones! 

[jyndor]

You know, the conversation about sea shanties is just another chapter in what seems like the endless story of people of color, in particular black and indigenous people, telling us to learn the history of the things we like and white people hearing that it means we have to lock those things away forever and burn our books and stamp on our records. As if that isn’t what white people have done to black and indigenous stories, to black and indigenous cultures, to black and indigenous arts, wealth, etc for centuries. As if that is what the people of color who are educating us on the things we like are actually advocating for. News flash: part of the history of oppressors is fearing the tables turning, when that is never been the goal of civil rights and social justice movements. Ever.

So fun fact: I grew up loving good ol’ classic rock n’ roll. My first concert was the Allman Brothers Band, which is one of the most interesting rock bands of all time imo. I really love a good southern twangy jam, the way the guitars sing, the bluesy sunny vibe. Ramblin’ Man? Jessica? Simple Man? Carry On Wayward Son? Hotel California? Perfect fucking driving music if you ask me.

If you know anything about southern rock, you know the iconography - the Confederate Flag is everywhere, in the crowds, for many bands it’s in the album covers and the photoshoots, etc. You know what you get when you wade in the Southern rock water*.

The lyrics from Lynyrd Skynyrd’s Sweet Home Alabama have been parsed and interpreted in all kinds of ways -

In Birmingham they love the governor (boo-boo-boo) Now we all did what we could do Now Watergate does not bother me Does your conscience bother you?

And yeah, you could read this as ironic or satirical. In fact, that’s what guitarist and co-writer Gary Rossington says according to NPR -

"A lot of people believed in segregation and all that. We didn't. We put the 'boo, boo, boo' there saying, 'We don't like Wallace,' " Rossington said. But he also added that there were "a lot of different interpretations. I'm sure if you asked the other guys who are not with us anymore and are up in rock and roll heaven, they have their story of how it came about."

And yeah, maybe they didn’t like George Wallace or Nixon. Sure. Whatever. I could buy it, actually. Because this song actually is indicative of how many privileged people feel when they perceive being called out, even if the criticism isn’t about them. Call it wjhat you want - white fragility, white liberal sensitivity, etc. This song was written in response to Neil Young’s Southern Man, which goes:

Southern man, better keep your head Don't forget what your good book said Southern change gonna come at last Now your crosses are burning fast

Southern man I saw cotton and I saw black Tall white mansions and little shacks Southern man, when will you pay them back? I heard screamin' and bullwhips cracking How long? How long? How?

Yeah, writer Ronnie Van Zant was so bothered by Neil Young talking about l*nchings, abject sl*very and reparations in Southern Man, a song that isn’t even about them or Alabama in particular, that he wrote Sweet Home Alabama.

Well I heard Mister Young sing about her Well I heard ol' Neil put her down Well I hope Neil Young will remember A southern man don't need him around anyhow

Sweet home Alabama Where the skies are so blue Sweet home Alabama Lord I'm comin' home to you 

So ironically, even though Neil Young was just talking to racists in the US South, someone who ostensibly didn’t agree with segregation took that song as a personal attack because he liked “southern culture” and his home state of Alabama, despite its flaws.

But Young never says that the South is irredeemable. He just says white southerners need to come to terms with their history (and yes make reparations). In fact, according to NPR he has some issues with his lyrics. “I didn't like my words when I wrote them. They are accusatory and condescending.” I don’t agree. It needs to be said.

So Van Zant and the Skynyrd guys heard a criticism of white Southern racism and at BEST thought, “well that’s an unfair portrayal of me, a southern white man.” Van Zant can’t answer this question for himself since he died in a plane crash with two other band members and their manager in 1977.

In my opinion, knowing how white people can be when confronted with the reality of racism, this feels a lot like every other time a well-meaning white person (myself included) has said, “but not all white people.”

Not all Southern whites supported segregation at the time, but most did - and all white people benefit from the legacy of sl*very. I might not be a descendant of people who enslaved others, my ancestors might have come here as refugees, but after they fled Ireland for New York, they threw black people under the bus for whiteness.

Rock is a genre that owes everything to Black musicians - to blues and spirituals and gospel and yes, Black work songs. Black history is in the DNA of rock music. That I grew up thinking it was white music is mortifying to be honest.

But I don’t really like Sweet Home Alabama and I never have. It’s kind of just meh to me. Not a big loss.

And that takes me to the Allman Brothers Band. As far as I am aware, ABB (through many, many iterations - this is another band plagued by tragedy) has never been cool with racism. According to Vulture:

The Allmans respected not just black art but black players; as kids, Gregg and Duane got lessons from an older black guitarist their mother once refused to allow into her home, and later, they caught hell having Jaimoe and bassist Lamar Williams in their ranks in their adopted home state of Georgia. “If a musician could play, we didn’t look at his skin color,” Gregg wrote in his 2012 memoir My Cross to Bear.

“Nobody around here had seen guys who looked like them,” soul food legend and friend of the band Mama Louise Hudson said in Alan Paul’s 2014 oral history One Way Out: The Inside History of the Allman Brothers Band. “A lot of the white folk around here did not approve of them long-haired boys, or of them always having a black guy with them.” Southern rock occupied a peculiar axis of Mason-Dixon pride and reverence to blues and soul veterans who were hampered and harangued by the politics of the South. Gregg always pushed back. He didn’t placate audiences’ blind patriotism and racism the way Charlie Daniels and Hank Williams Jr. have. Last year, he spoke out against North Carolina’s transphobic “bathroom bill,” and when asked about the confederate flag in 2015, he told Radio.com, “If people are gonna look at that flag and think of it as representing slavery, then I say burn every one of them.”

And that is great.

But.

Whipping Post. Written by white ally Gregg Allman, bluesy and wild and passionate on a level that is hard to imagine, this is... one of the greatest songs I have ever heard. And it also makes me wonder if it’s maybe belittling a part of slavery.

My friends tell me, that I've been such a fool But I had to stand by and take it baby, all for lovin' you I drown myself in sorrow as I look at what you've done But nothing seemed to change, the bad times stayed the same, And I can't run Sometimes I feel, sometimes I feel Like I been tied to the whippin' post Tied to the whippin' post, tied to the whippin' post Good Lord, I feel like I'm dyin'.

Honestly? I don’t know. I’ve researched it, I’ve used google. There isn’t a lot the internet has to say about this song that isn’t “this song fucking slaps man!!!” Maybe part of it is the larger context - Allman was staunchly against racism and was taught by a Black guitarist and played with Black musicians and loved Black music. A white man comparing an emotionally abusive relationship with being whipped might feel different without that context.

(Whipping posts being used for people besides enslaved Black people does not mean Allman wasn’t referencing what Black American slaves experienced, so don’t even go there. I know. The Romans also had slaves. It’s different.)

But if some people of color on the internet critique this song someday, the appropriate response is not to act as if “hey here is where this comes from, please be mindful about historical context and get educated” means “never listen to that devil song again,” folks.

It’s about learning our histories so we can do better in the future. Not canceling entire genres of music. Some things are best left in the past but mostly it’s just about understanding what the things we love mean. And these things are more than their aesthetics.

*I also really, really love African American work songs. Always have.

[supernaturallyobsessedchic]

When He’s Sick

Pairing: Dean x reader

Warnings: sick!dean (it’s a thing, trust me), man flu (most women in relationships, also maybe some gay men would know the constant struggles when their man is sick the ‘man flu’ (usually it’s a cold)), mentions of depression, mentions of panic attacks, fluffiness

Word Count: 2,466

a/n: was reading @supernatural-jackles​ preference list, the title is same as her preference when the boys are sick. Here’s my imagination running wild when I should be preparing to post 7 Days to Die. But, Dammit Jen’s so good, plus, Jen, I hope this is okay...I never talked ahead of time with you about it, this happened spontaneously....I guess read and let me know if it’s all good. If not I’ll remove it.

~

They had been in the town for a number of days. Hunt finished, long finished. But it turns out, someone, somewhere, somehow, the boys got sick with a nasty virus.

Sam was the first down and out. Not throwing up, but heating up with a fever. But his gut feeling like he isn’t going to last. Even if he ate something light on his stomach.

Y/N offered a small variety of foods to the giant. Saltines, applesauce, banana, toast, mashed potatoes, soup, anything light. But he turned it down.

She heard retching in the bathroom. That leaves with the older Winchester. Now when he’s sick, he’s sick. Really sick. Hearing him lose the contents of last night’s supper told her he wasn’t going to be able to keep anything solid down. At least not heavy. But they need to eat something.

He came out after washing up, pale as a ghost. If not dead already. It worried her, seeing how pale he was.

“Any leads on Dick?” He asks, words slurred. A garbled burp escaped. Only to turn into another throw up session. When he felt something coming up, he turned at his heel to make it to the toilet.

It had been weeks since Bobby’s death, Dean was running himself ragged finding Dick. Both him and Sam both wanted revenge. But at least, Sam knows when to stop to sleep and eat. But Dean, has one speed. Go.

She could only shake her head. He needs to take a break.

“You are in no condition to keep this up Dean.” She says from the door.

“Rain or shine, I’m hunting Dick.” He says. He hears her snort. “Oh grow up.” he groans as another wave hit him. Only making him groan louder, unable to throw up.

She took the time to head out to grab some supplies for them before they leave to head to the hunters cabin where they hid out, but also primarily lived.

Grabbing canned soups, broth, and even grabbed a thing of potatoes to mash up. She had weird, not so traditional ways of getting nourishment when sick but also something to be easy on the stomach.

Driving back she heads to their room. Sam still in bed, sound asleep. She hears a moan from the kitchen. To find Dean on the floor.

“Dean!” she says, concerned. Dropping the groceries on the table before rushing over to help him up.

“I’m fine.” He slurs.

“You’re not fine, you’re on the kitchen floor for no reason.” She says, helping him up.

She could feel the muscles in his arms trembling, they were fatigued.

“The floor moved on me.” He mumbles.

As she struggles to get him up right, she had his back at her chest, so his head fell back on her shoulder. He was out of it. But she wraps an arm around to touch his forehead.

“Dean, you’re burning up. We need to cool you off.” She says. Pushing him up to his feet.

“Seriously, I’m fine.” He continues.

He’s up, but knees weak nearly gave out. She has his arm around her shoulder as she practically dragged him to his bed. When his but landed on the side of the bed he didn’t stop the rest of his body to fall onto the bed with a significant bounce.

“No you’re not. You got something, you and Sam both. You threw up, and are running a fever. You need to stop and rest. It’s not gonna kill you.” She says.

He didn’t have the energy to fight her. He doesn’t even fight her when she takes his boots off. Undressing him down to his t-shirt and boxers, tucking him in bed under a thin layer of sheets.

I’m gonna have to play nurse. She thought.

Pulling the thermometer out on the boys. Sam rang a temperature in the hundreds, but it was easily manageable.

“102, just rest up Sam, ‘kay?” she says.

Sam nods. “No problem, this sucks.” He groans.

“I’m making some soup and mashed potatoes. It’s cream of chicken and veggie soup. What’s best is you could also put some of the soup on the potatoes.” She suggests.

“Sounds good, my stomach has calmed down some, so I’ll try some.” He says.

“That’s good.” She says.

“How’s Dean?” he asked.

“His fever is nearing 104, he ate a few saltines before taking the fever reducer. He’ll try to throw up, but it just turns into dry heaves, I can tell they hurt. Whatever he got, it’s worse than what you have.” She says.

“If he gets worse?” he asks.

“He might need to go to the hospital then. For all I know it’s just the flu.” She says.

“The flu can get bad though.” Sam goes.

“In kids and the immunocompromised. And the elderly…And the uninsured…” she listed.

Sam chuckled. “It’s so sad how it’s preventable, but the government makes it a fucking hassle to just take care of your own health.” He says.

“And they die as the end result, because the meds they need or the care they need are too much for them, and they can’t get them. It’s wrong on so many levels. It’s like they’re bullies stealing our lunch money, they’re holding it out of reach and we’re too short to grab it.” she says.

“That’s what I was thinking of saying. But I’m not thinking straight.” He says.

“It’s the fever. Rest up Sammy. I’ll tell the caretaker we’re staying until you two are a little better. At least better enough for the road trip back to the cabin.” She suggests.

“I know I could, him I’m worried about.” Sam says. She nods, agreeing.

 She was only able to get them the room for a couple of more hours before they had to move out. Sam was able to eat her soup and potatoes, Dean not so much. The smell of the food made him gag.

“I’m sorry sweetheart, I just made it look like your food smells awful, and it don’t. it smells amazing, my stomach is just in knots.” Dean whines, rolling on his side in his bed.

“It’s okay Dean, I know. I could tell you wanted to try but your stomach is making it rough. I’ll just pack it up in some topper wear and I’ll pack us up and drive us back.” She says.

“Um, no, you’re not driving my car.” Dean says, trying to get up. Only to dry heave while getting up, lurching forward, nothing coming up.

“Dean, you’re in no condition. Neither is Sam. I couldn’t get us to stay longer. You’re just going to have to deal with it.” she says. “I’ll help you out to the car when we’re ready.” She says.

 The drive was smoother than it could have been. Dean passed out in the back seat; Sam curled up in his usual sleeping position when it came to sitting in the passenger seat.

She didn’t like driving older vehicles. They drove like boats, and this was worse, it was a truck. The year wasn’t that far off, but it was old enough. The four door truck had comfy, inviting seats that took Sam and Dean into dreamland in the instant they got comfortable.

She managed to get the cabin just fine, unpacking without jostling them awake. She got their beds ready with cleaner sheets, Sam was easy to wake up. He was eager to get into a bed. Dean was reluctant, already cozy and relaxed he was content with sleeping in the truck.

“Dean, you can’t stay in here. You’ll make your fever worse.” She says, nudging him awake more.

“Fine.” He mumbles, sitting up sluggishly. Shoulders slumped.

“Come on Dean, I’ll help you.” She says.

“I can walk myself.” He snaps. He’s grumpy.

She snapped her hand away from him, letting him walk himself. But kept to herself after that. But it didn’t really stop her from checking in on him.

Cleaning the cabin she put on her phone her music she’d sing to while doing such chores. Grew up on country music she listened to some old Keith Urban Music, from his albums Defy Gravity, Love, Pain and the Whole Crazy thing, and Be Here, she dusted singing along to Standin’ Right in Front of You.

“Y/N, please stop singing! I’m trying to sleep!” she heard Dean shout from his room.

Feeling guilty, she just hummed the song as she cleaned. She felt bad for a minute, the feeling sticking with her throughout her cleaning.

She cooked up more soup for the boys, cleaned, and once done she just jammed out on the couch with the TV on Spanish Soap Operas. Trying to shake the guilt feeling she had early, as it crept back up on her.

 That night, after the boys ate and got situated for bed, one Winchester had something on his mind.

She was watching cable television, surfing here and there trying to get away from Spanish Soaps, but always finding her way back when finding nothing else on. She heard the floor creak behind her.

Her headphones were off, music off, just relaxing watching TV, she turned to see the older Winchester standing adjacent of the couch. Looking exhausted.

“You’re not coming to bed?” he asked. Voice still rough from being sick.

“I’m not tired. Besides, you need the bed. You’re still sick.” She says softly.

“You’ve been cleaning all day, taking care of me and Sam, you’ve got to be exhausted.” He says, something off about his tone.

“Dean, it’s fine. Just go back to bed, rest.” She says kindly.

He doesn’t say anything to that, but sits on the couch with her.

“Do you even like Spanish Soap Operas?” he asks, hiding a chuckle.

“I don’t like Soap Operas period.” She says. “But we got only cable TV, and it’s 2 in the morning. There’s nothing on.” She says.

“I’m sensing there’s more going on.” Dean goes.

“Dean, why are you up in the first place?” She asks. “You’re sick, you need to rest to get better.” She adds.

“Well see, there’s this girl. She’s more than a friend to me. I’ve been kind of a dick to her lately.” He says.

“Dean, it’s not your fault. I shouldn’t have babied you; I should have kept it down when I was cleaning. It’s fine.” She says.

“And I know how sensitive you are, and can be. You love to take care of those you love. I’m the same way.” He says. “I guess I was more mad at myself for getting sick, I was so fixated on finding Dick I even didn’t care how sick I got.” He adds.

“You got a drive in you it’s scary, but it’s fine Dean. You’re only human. You have limitations, we all do. But you got to recognize your physical limitations and give yourself a break, and then get back at it again when you’re better.” She says.

“Back at you sweetheart.” He goes.

“Huh?” she asks.

“You got to know your mental limitations too. I’ve noticed how quiet you’ve been getting since we got sick. Plus, in the past, I’ve seen it happen. Sam mentioned it to me, Bobby knew it. Depression. It’s no joke Y/N. You got to take care of yourself mentally too.” Dean says.

She locks up, her walls going on. And he sees her tense. “And it’s okay if you don’t want to talk about it. but you can’t bottle it up. You got to deal with it. But you don’t have to do it alone.” He adds.

She nods, fiddling with her fingers.

“What has that demon told you in your head lately?” he asks.

“I’m not doing good enough to care for you or Sam.” She says quietly. Voice beginning to crack. “Stop trying.” She adds.

“You know that’s bull shit right?” he asks. He can see her shake her head.

“You snapped at me, yelled at me to keep it down.” she says. “That’s when it started getting bad.” She adds.

“And now?” he asks.

“It’s saying he’s going to throw you out; he doesn’t want you or your issues. You’re too much for him.” She says. Her throat holding back a sob.

“I’d never do that to you. You’re more than my friend, you’re my girl. I know I haven’t been the best friend lately. But I’m here now. Yes I’m sick, but I want to be there for my girl.” He says. “I’ll kick this demons ass for you, just tell me what you need.” He adds.

“I’m about to have a panic attack, I can feel it come on, can you hold me through it?” she asks, her voice disappearing.

Not saying a word, he invites her in his arms, and the two cuddle on the couch as she cries her eyes out, shakes and trembles, and works to get her breathing under control.

After a while she fallen asleep in the Older Winchester’s arms, when a wooden creak can be heard in the living room.

“How is she holding up?” Sam asks, walking in.

“She’s asleep now, that was a bad attack from the looks of it.” Dean says.

“How are you feeling by the way?” Sam asks.

“Better, but still a little under the weather. You?” He says.

“A bit better. Just a sore throat now.” Sam answers.

“I say we take care of her tomorrow, even if she’s not sick, but she needs us.” Dean says.

“I agree with that.” Sam says. “You up to carrying her or?” He asks.

“Dude, I’m exhausted. And I really don’t want to move her. Just grab us a blanket and some pillows, we’ll crash here.” Dean says with a groan.

“Sure thing.” Sam says with a tired smile. Heading into Dean’s room, grabbing a few blankets, a couple of pillows and heads back to the couch covering them up, and handing Dean the pillows.

“Night Jerk.” Sam goes.

“Night Bitch.” Dean says.

 Sun rose high that morning. Dean woke up with, feeling a warm spot on his chest. Seeing her still asleep, not moving from her spot.

Brushing a strand of hair back, his fingers grace over her forehead. His brows furrow when he feels how warm she feels.

She moans, waking up, causing a dry cough.

“Sounds like someone got sick.” Dean says.

“I feel sick too.” She says, her voice rough and scratchy.

“I finally get to return the favor, and take care of you for a change.” He says with a big grin, hugging her close making her giggle.

“I’m loving it so far.” She says hugging him back.

~

Copying and reposting someone else’s content is plagiarism and illegal. This work is property of supernaturallyobsessedchic. ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. These works contain material protected under International and Federal Copyright Laws and Treaties. Any unauthorized reprint or use of this material is prohibited. No part of these works may be reproduced in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical, including photocopying, recording, or by any information storage and retrieval system without express written permission from the author / publisher. An electronic reference link to the original posted work may be provided for purposes of promotion or assistance of publication by the readers discretion, if proper credits are given to the author in the re-post. 10/2/2020

~

Dean Taglist:

@pandazombie69​, @luci-in-trenchcoats​, @supernatural-jackles​, @becs-bunker​, @mlovesstories​, @winchesters-favorite-girl​

[moonlit-imagines]

Back to Haly’s

Dick Grayson x reader

warnings: clowns

a/n: titans!dick requests are NOT open right now, i just found some inspiration for him and i had to write it

prompt: y/n was raised in haly’s circus alongside dick, these childhood friends haven’t seen each other in a long, long time

Haly’s Circus, the lovely traveling caravan of all sorts of interesting people that Dick grew up around before...the accident. It just so happened to be in town and the other Titans begged him to come along on their visit to the fairgrounds. He decided “why the hell not?” He was torturing himself.

It had been over fifteen years since he’d seen any of his old circus family, he doubted anyone would recognize him while he made his rounds through the place. But Dick should have known better, he wasn’t as forgettable as he thought he was.

“Richie Grayson?!” You gasped from behind him and he knew exactly who it was before he had even turned around to take a look. When he finally took a look he saw a very cute clown approaching with their arms wide, wrapping him up in an obnoxious hug. “It really is you!” You planted a huge kiss on his cheek.

“Y/N L/N, I can’t believe it.” Dick’s grin nearly matched your clown makeup as he looked you up and down. “Wow, this brings me back to the good old days.”

“Oh, yeah, ‘the good old days,’ huh?” You let out a loud, over-expressive laugh, staying in character was no joke to you. “Do you remember that time we finally convinced our parents to let us do an act together?” Dick’s jaw dropped the second that sentence was born.

“Don’t remind me!” He covered his face and softly chuckled at the memories you’d brought back to him, memories he thought he’d never think up again. “We royally screwed that one up.”

“Well, I think we did a bang-up job!” You recalled the past, remembering so many old feelings and shenanigans. “Remember! I twisted my ankle mid-show and pretended it was apart of my act?” You pointed a finger at Dick, putting him on the spot. It was barely a second before Dick had turned red in the face from recalling that moment.

“I had to drag you across the dirt floor by your good ankle to make the act look ‘realistic.’” He made finger quotes and shook his head at your past selves.

“I ruined my favorite pair of tights that day...” You mourned the loss of your old performance clothing by taking a moment of silence. “So, Richie!” You suddely clapped and caught Dick’s attention again. “Any plans for tonight? How late are you staying here?”

“Oh, yeah, no plans. It really depends on when my friends decide they’re done for the day.” Dick rubbed the back of his neck and shrugged.

“Well, only if you’re up for it, maybe we could get some dinner and catch up? Haly’s letting me off early tonight, lucky you.” You put your hands on your sides all cocky-like and waited for Dick’s response, tapping your clown shoes, which sure put a smile on Dick’s face.

“Yes, y/n, I’d love to.” He handed you his phone so you could put your number in and took a gander around the fairgrounds. “Where might I fight Haly? I’ve missed him a lot through the years.”

“This way, that way, that way, blue and red trailer on the right.” You gave the directions before handing Dick’s phone back. “You can’t miss it. And he’s missed you, too. Every once in a while he brings out old photo albums and talks about how he wished things were different.” You got a bit more serious with Dick, but it didn’t last too long. Before you knew it, a group of younger kids, between 15 and 20, came running at you two.

“Dick! Who’s this?” The green haired boy asked, taking notice in the way the two of you acted together. You wrapped your arm around his shoulders and pulled him closer.

“I’m y/n! Me and Richie go way back.” You told him.

“Oh, cool. Hi, I’m Gar.” He waved awkwardly and looked at Dick. “‘Richie?’”

“Yeah, y/n always called me Richie when I was younger.” He admitted while blushing, which the others seemed to pick up quick. You patted his back and pushed him forward.

“Okay, well, I’ve gotta get back to clowning around. I look forward to seeing you tonight!” You blew Dick a kiss and sweetly waved him goodbye in an animated fashion, then skipped away while the other Titans watched.

“You have to tell us the full story, Dick.” Jason snorted at the situation that unfolded in front of him, wrapping his arm around Rose’s waist.

“Later, I have something to do.”

—————

You texted Dick to meet you at your trailer while you were de-clowning. It was a process, really. There are a lot of clothing choices that go along with this profession, so many layers. You finally wiped your makeup off and undid the crazy hairstyle that went along with your hat.

While you were dressing into a more “casual” outfit, you heard a knock on your door.

“It’s open!” You answered and heard the door jam up a bit. “Just pull a little harder, my door gets stuck sometimes!” You called out while pulling a shirt over your head and watched the door swing open.

“Nice place.” Dick nodded while looking around your personal trailer.

“Couldn’t be better than that mansion you lived in.” You commented and pulled your shoes on before looking up at the flowers in Dick’s grasp. “Are those for me?” You asked and he hesitated.

“I hope that’s okay...” He chuckled and moved his hand through his hair. You held back a smile, trying to remember the last time anyone had done something as sweet as that for you. He held the flowers out for you and you gladly took them.

“It’s very much welcomed.” You hugged him. “Thank you.” You set them down on your makeshift vanity and took one last look in the mirror.

“Hey, do you remember when we were kids and...” Dick paused for a minute, regretting bringing this story up. “Nevermind.”

“No, please go on, Richie!” You begged him with a huge, over-exaggerated frown that he just couldn’t resist. He took a deep breath and swallowed his pride.

“We were hiding underneath the bleachers during one of the shows, tuning in and out of the performance. We were only hiding because we didn’t want to clean up after the show.” Dick chuckled at his old memories and you joined, having a feeling you knew exactly where this was going. “You had snagged a few bags of popcorn and we snacked on them while we watched the fire performance. I kept getting popcorn stuck in my teeth and complaining about it.”

“You asked me to ‘take a peak’ and I couldn’t find any.” You nodded along, recalling his story, as well.

“Then we realized how close we were to each other and panicked and scooted a few feet back.” Dick added, shaking his head at the innocence you shared in your youth. “But I missed you even though you were right there, so I moved right next to you and wrapped my arm around you...” He was almost embarrassed to say the next part, he just looked at you with a dumb little smile that reminded you of all the times you shared together.

“And then I kissed you and you said, ‘hah! I knew you liked me!’” You mocked his tone and finished the story.

“And you said, ‘please, it was obvious you liked me back,’ and we agreed and made out under the crowd.” He added and the two of you burst into your juvenile laughter, just wishing things could be that simple again. Wishing he had never left, wishing you two could have been something.

“A first for both of us.” You sighed. “First kiss, first makeout session...”

“First love.” Dick raised his eyebrows, waiting for your response. Your eyes went wide, knowing it was true. You’d pushed your feelings for him away the last time you saw him. Seeing him again brought them all back in a flood of joy and pain. Dick took a few steps closer to you and it felt like that night all over again when his face was so close to yours.

“I’ve missed you.” You whispered with your eyes staring right into one another’s. He leaned forward, placing his hand under your chin and putting his lips to yours, then moving his other arm around your waist and pulling you close to him. All of his troubles faded away as his lips moved in resonance with yours, slowly backing you up and laying you onto your bed with him hovering over you.

“You’re a much better kisser now.” Dick joked with you, lightening the mood a little bit before you grabbed him by the shirt collar and pulled him back down to you.

“And you’re a better flirt. Wonder if you still wear tights...”

[voodoochili]

My 75 Favorite Albums of 2020

Every year produces excellent music and 2020 was no exception. The exceptional thing about this year, though, is the loss of livelihood so many musicians suffered as a result of the pandemic. To better celebrate all I’ve listened to and loved this year, I’ve expanded my albums list from 50 to 75 albums and included a highlight track from each in the Spotify playlist below. If you like what you hear, why not throw the artist a few dollars on Bandcamp?

Check the Spotify playlist HERE.

Without further ado, my favorite albums of 2020. Happy New Year, and happy listening!

10. Playboi Carti - Whole Lotta Red: Carti’s long-awaited opus has only been out for a week, which is probably not a long enough time to give an album as sprawling and surprising as this one a full critical evaluation. But I do know when I’m hearing something that’s unlike anything I’ve ever heard: this album rearranges hip-hop at the molecular level. 

Whole Lotta Red is overstuffed with invention, the glitchy, expansive production giving Carti ample opportunity to glom onto the contours of the beat and experiment with his voice. That voice is the album’s main attraction: it squeaks, it squeals, it roars, it spits, it shudders, and organizes itself into irresistibly ignorant mantras (my current favorite is “Lamborghini parked outside, it’s purple like lean”). 

Across its 24 tracks (which feels like too many, sure, but only the 5-minute long Kid Cudi-infected droner “Metamorphosis” overstays its welcome), Carti plays with listener expectations, annihilating rap songwriting conventions (why do you need verse-chorus structure if every line is a hook) as he defiantly proclaims his desire to be unlike anybody else. Though it bears some resemblance in sound and subject matter to Future’s Monster (and much of the production owes a debt to the work of Lil Uzi Vert’s favored Working Of Dying collective), Whole Lotta Red firmly establishes Carti as a totemic figure connecting mainstream and underground sounds.

9. BbyMutha - Muthaland: BbyMutha is a natural born spitter, armed with a drawly stutter-stepping flow that routinely annihilates unconventional instrumentals. She glows with supreme confidence and comfort in her own skin, especially when she’s dripping with disdain with those who’d dare refuse her the respect she deserves. A 25-track opus that earns every minute of its runtime, Muthaland is an engrossing immersion into Mutha’s world, balancing a fascination with the occult (“Sorry I don’t fuck with n****s who don’t fuck with Satan”) with grounding interjections from close friends and her four children. Boasting rockstar fantasies like “Heavy Metal,” bad girl anthems like “Nice Guy,” and dancefloor-ready jams like “Cocaine Catwalk,” Muthaland is a tour-de-force by one of rap’s singular voices, and if she’s really finished with music as she’s claimed (rappers never really retire, but Mutha has indicated she wants to focus full time on her Apothecary), the game will greatly miss her incisive punchlines and crudely empowering perspective.

8. Westerman - Your Hero Is Not Dead: In 2020, Mid-’80s sophistipop grew into one of my favorite comfort foods. Westerman’s Your Hero Is Not Dead struck me directly in the sophistipop sweet spot, evoking the attention-to-detail and synth-heavy craftsmanship of that era and pairing it with harmonic complexity and a piercing emotionalism that recalls his idol Neil Young. On songs like “Blue Comanche” and “The Line,” Westerman constructs tales as twisty as his melodies, economically exploring how people relate to each other at the beginning and end of romantic relationships. Westerman complements his tasteful palette of synth sounds with intricate and lyrical guitar playing, most notably on the sighing, gorgeous instrumental “Float Over,” which softly segues into the title track to end the album on a gently-rising high note.

7. WizKid - Made In Lagos: The focal point of the sub-Saharan Afrobeats renaissance, Lagos is having one of the most exciting musical moments of any city since Kingston in the early ‘70s. WizKid is one of the scene’s biggest stars, with an ability to combine the sonic tapestry of his hometown with Caribbean-influenced beats and vocal styles. Made In Lagos is a masterwork of sound design, bringing creamy bass, chicken-scratch speckles of guitar, tasteful interjections of saxophone and brass, and an intoxicating mix of acoustic and electronic percussion, all offered in service to an immaculate vibe that matches the album cover’s shiny, monochromatic color scheme. Made with lockdown in mind, the album eschews uptempo dancefloor workouts in favor of stress-relief and romance. WizKid plays the perfect host, tamping down his melodic flights of fancy and embracing a song-serving smoothness. He’s a warm and inviting presence throughout, laying out the red carpet for a cross-continental cast of collaborators like H.E.R., Skepta, Burna Boy, and Damian Marley. The result is a truly global pop masterpiece, capable of brightening even the dourest day of a miserable year.

6. Ka - Descendants of Cain: Firefighter by day and rapper/producer by night, Ka is a master of allusion. He organizes his thoughts into themed collections of metaphor, illustrating the bleak realities of street life with gnomic symbolism. On Descendants Of Cain, Ka’s strongest work to date, the enigmatic rapper expresses himself through a litany of biblical references, drawing parallels between ancient parables (he goes far deeper than the Cain/’caine double entendre that rappers have been using for decades) and the stark code of morality with which he lives his life. The 48-year-old hermit produced the project himself, creating an immersive sonic realm, crafting expansive, noir-ish backing tracks populated by late-night saxophones, sparkling pianos, and the occasional shot of sweeping strings. Once again, Ka’s music comes almost entirely without drums (certainly without “beats” in the traditional hip-hop sense–every once in a while, he adds an open hi-hat or a subdued shaker), the artist preferring to let his music swirl around his half-whispered words of wisdom. The album ends on a tearful, sentimental note with “I Love (Mimi, Moms, Kev),” in which the artist ditches the biblical lyrical conceit and expresses his love for his wife, his mom, and his best friend atop light percussion and a warm soul sample.

5. SAULT - Untitled (Rise): Rise is the second part of a diptych that SAULT recorded in response to the movement that exploded in the wake of George Floyd’s death. Black Is, the first part, is a great album (you’ll find it in the lower reaches of my 2020 list), but the mysterious UK collective fulfilled their immense potential with Rise, a propulsive, powerful, and danceable album that doubles as a thought-provoking examination of the nature of freedom and liberation. The album tackles weighty topics–police violence, fake-woke “allies,” protest, cultural appropriation–but handles them with an inspiring effervescence and a propulsion meant to usher right-thinking people into the streets. The music itself is an intoxicating marvel, combining elements from every trendy musical movement from the early ‘80s (post-disco, post-punk, house, hip-hop, whatever the hell ESG was) into a percussive and surprisingly cohesive cocktail. The album immediately makes its greatness known with its first four songs, one of the strongest opening runs of any album in recent memory: the swaggering, funky, keep-your-head-up anthem “Strong,” which features a drum solo from SAULT architect Inflo, the soaring, club-ready vamp “Fearless,” concept-establishing, string-heavy interlude “Rise,” and especially “I Just Want to Dance,” the best song ESG never wrote. 

4. Fiona Apple - Fetch The Bolt Cutters: Fetch The Bolt Cutters arrived with the kind of universal acclaim that can make some people suspicious. The Pitchfork review got a lot of attention, not just for its perfect score but for its bold statement that “no music has ever sounded quite like it.” 

That statement might’ve been slightly hyperbolic. Fetch The Bolt Cutters has the kind of propulsive left-hand piano figures, chest-thumping percussion, and impassioned vocal performances that we haven’t heard since...the last Fiona Apple album. But the album deserves its experimental reputation. These songs mess around with song structure and melody in ways that resemble avant-garde singers like Meredith Monk, use overlapping vocals that occasionally evoke the works of post-modern composers like Luciano Berio, and echoing modernist composers like Edgard Varese in the way she wrings pathos out of rhythmic elements.

Though Fetch might be a slight step down from The Idler Wheel, it’s an invigorating listen, packed with the soul-baring confessionals that only Fiona is capable of executing. Combining literary wordplay with plainspoken directness, Fiona forces the listener to confront her trauma and contemplate her diagnoses of patriarchal ills. The songs are uniformly excellent–especially opener “I Want You To Love Me,” the most “traditional” song on the record, and “Shameika,” a burrowing childhood rumination with a happy ending–but Fetch The Bolt Cutters stands out to me as a collection of amazing moments: when the jig-like “For Her” fades into an unforgettably painful cadence (“Good mornin’, good mornin’/You raped me in the same bed your daughter was born in”), Fiona’s ground-shaking vocal intensity at the end of “Newspaper,” her dogs howling over the outro of “Fetch The Bolt Cutters,” the winking repetition of the title phrase on “Ladies.” Her albums display more than enough ambition to forgive the long gestation periods, but hopefully we won’t have to wait another 8 years for Fiona to bare her soul once again.

3. Drakeo The Ruler - Thank You For Using GTL: Embroiled in a Kafkaesque legal saga that shines a light on the worst aspects of our horrendous justice system, Drakeo The Ruler spent more than three years wrongly incarcerated for a crime he not only did not commit, but for which he was acquitted (for more info on Drakeo’s ordeal, read Jeff Weiss). He’s now mercifully a free man, mostly due to the work of his lawyer, but at least partially because of publicity generated by Thank You For Using GTL. Recorded over the phone from prison during the height of the pandemic, it’s a miracle that an album created under such sub-optimal conditions sounds as excellent as it does, but credit producer JoogSzn–who not only supplied the creeping, head-nodding backing tracks but recorded Drakeo’s phoned-in vocals–and engineer MixedByNavin for the project’s astonishing fidelity. Drakeo and Joog spent hours on the phone to record the album, in the process paying thousands of dollars to GTL, the predatory telecom company of choice for the L.A. corrections system, whose mechanical interjections serve as a constant reminder of the injustice that made the album necessary. Of course, a good story is a good story, but that alone doesn’t get an album on 2020’s most prestigious Best Albums list (mine). It’s a classic rap album, perhaps the best ever released by an incarcerated rapper, and a thumb directly in the nose of the D.A. and the LAPD. The album is a lyrical marvel, packed with winding wordplay and outlandish flexes, as Mr. Mosley takes aim at 6ix9ine, cackles at sorry-ass Instagram haters, and sneers at American-made cars (“To be honest, a Hellcat isn’t a foreign”). Each song has a carefully considered concept, the rapper’s punchlines building upon one another to make an airtight case for his status as L.A.’s top dog. He contrasts his own whip-crashing lifestyle with flashy wannabes on “GTA VI” and “Backflip or Sumn,” mourns a favorite department store on “RIP Barneys,” and proves he still doesn’t rap beef on “Maestro’s Tension.” The album’s masterstroke comes with “Fictional,” the final track, in which Drakeo exposes the prosecution’s use of his lyrics as evidence in criminal proceedings as the farce it is: “It might sound real, but it’s fictional/I love that my imagination gets to you.” Drakeo’s story was a rare bright spot in 2020, and a rare one with a happy ending. Just last week, the rapper released Because Y’All Asked, a studio-recorded version of Thank You For Using GTL, giving the album’s songs the clarity they deserve. But I think I’ll mostly return to the original, which will live on as an excellent album and a vital document of post-George Floyd America.

2. Pa Salieu - Send Them to Coventry: Hailing from the middle of nowhere–or, more accurately city in the English Midlands only known in the states for its middling Premier League team–Gambian-British artist Pa Salieu served up the most distinctive, visceral, and daring rap debut of the year. His style fuses elements of grime, drill, afro-trap, dancehall, and the darker edges of U.S. hip-hop into a percussive slurry, injected with the urgency of his struggle to survive. The magic of the album comes from the way Pa’s fluid flows interact with the shimmering and foreboding production (Felix Joseph and Aod lead the cast of the project’s sound architects), which is perfectly suited for cold city nights. He slips effortlessly into the pocket, toe-tagging the beats with a combination of aggression and trance-like meditation and uttering casually powerful pronouncements (“I'd make a killa riddim offa any riddim/The grind can never stop 'til I'm wrapped in linen”) that make you believe he’s Britain’s next great rapper. Pa keeps the vibe consistent throughout, but the moments that stand out are the moments when he locks into an unbreakable groove over no-frills production, like on singles “Block Boy,” “Betty,” and “B***K.” The artist’s wry sense of humor and brash confidence keeps the album from feeling bleak, but Send Them To Coventry wisely ends on “Energy,” a warm and bright ode to keeping your creative spark safe from the prying forces of fame and fortune.

1. Kassa Overall - I Think I’m Good: “I think I’m good”–a phrase that’s ran through my head throughout this shitstorm of a year. Sure, I postponed a wedding, cancelled trips, and saw my friends and family much less often than I would like, but I count myself among the lucky ones. Still breathing, still sane. Though it was recorded and released before the pandemic started, Kassa Overall’s I Think I’m Good became a lodestar of sorts for me. It’s a brilliantly introspective and deeply personal album about existing in enclosed spaces–whether a jail cell, an NYC subway car, or the inescapable prison of your own body.

Kassa Overall made his name as a jazz drummer, touring with icons like Geri Allen, but his solo music incorporates elements of hip-hop, classical, and trap to create a wholly original milieu. The album features contributions from over 30 accomplished voices, ranging from luminary Vijay Iyer, to Kassa’s saxophonist brother Carlos Overall, to virtuosic pianist Sullivan Fortner, to venerated activist Angela Davis. But all the disparate elements come together in service of Kassa’s deeply personal and engrossing vision.

Taking partial inspiration from Kassa’s struggle with manic depression, the music fluctuates between meditative calm and unbearable tension, mimicking the patter of an unquiet mind. Album opener “Visible Walls,” is a mesmerizing prayer for salvation soundtracked by fluttering harps, piercing woodwinds, and heartbeat percussion. “Find Me” buries a plea for help within a cacophony of sampled voices and rattling piano notes. Fortner’s piano guides us through the hauntingly devastating “Halfway House” and the Chopin-indebted “Darkness In Mind,” each highlighting a different stage of grief (despair and acceptance, respectively). The arc of I Think I’m Good concludes with the hopeful “Got Me A Plan” and “Was She Happy (For Geri Allen),” a Vijay Iyer-assisted tribute to his late friend and mentor. 

It’s ironic that an album that so deeply explores the feeling of isolation vibrates with such a collaborative spirit. I Think I’m Good feels like an answered prayer–a community coming together to check on a beloved friend who’s gone through a tough time: “You good, man?” “I think so.”

Here’s the rest of my list.

11. Yves Tumor - Heaven To A Tortured Mind 12. Shackleton & Waclaw Zimpel - Primal Forms 13. Bob Dylan - Rough & Rowdy Ways 14. Duval Timothy - Help 15. Lil Uzi Vert - Eternal Atake 16. Moodymann - Taken Away 17. Secret Drum Band - Chuva 18. J Hus - Big Conspiracy 19. Headie One & Fred Again - GANG 20. Tiwa Savage - Celia 21. Andras - Joyful 22. Bill Callahan - Gold Record 23. King Von - Welcome To O’Block 24. Flo Milli - Ho, Why Is You Here? 25. Chubby & The Gang - Speed Kills 26. Madeline Kenney - Sucker’s Lunch 27. Empty Country - Empty Country 28. Smino - She Already Decided 29. Destroyer - Have We Met 30. Yves Jarvis - Sundry Rock Song Stock 31. Ela Minus - Acts Of Rebellion 32. Creeper - Sex, Death & The Infinite Void 33. Alabaster DePlume - To Cy & Lee: Instrumentals, Vol. 1 34. Good Sad Happy Bad - Shades 35. The 1975 - Notes On a Conditional Form 36. Kate NV - Room For The Moon 37. $ilkmoney - Attack of the Future Shocked, Flesh Covered, Meatbags of the 85 38. Eddie Chacon - Pleasure, Joy and Happiness 39. Kenny Segal & Serengeti - Ajai 40. Bad Bunny - YHLQMDLG 41. Kahlil Blu - DOG 42. Califone - Echo Mine 43. Boldy James - The Price of Tea in China/Manger On McNichols/The Versace Tape 44. Bufiman - Albumsi 45. Moses Boyd - Dark Matter 46. Thanya Iyer - KIND 47. Jyoti - Mama You Can Bet! 48. Obongjayar - Which Way Is Forward? 49. Rio Da Yung OG - City On My Back 50. Young Jesus - Welcome To Conceptual Beach 51. Owen Pallett - Island 52. Oceanator - Things I Never Said 53. Shootergang Kony - Red Paint Reverend 54. Shabason, Krgovich & Harris - Philadelphia 55. Six Organs of Admittance - Companion Rises 56. Lido Pimienta - Miss Colombia 57. Kelly Lee Owens - Inner Song 58. Polo G - The GOAT 59. Actress - Karma & Desire 60. Phoebe Bridgers - Punisher 61. Porridge Radio - Every Bad 62. Yg Teck - Eyes Won’t Close 63. Mozzy - Beyond Bulletproof 64. Ratboys - Printer’s Devil 65. R.A.P. Ferreira - Purple Moonlight Pages 66. Ulver - Flowers of Evil 67. Rina Sawayama - SAWAYAMA 68. SAULT - Untitled (Black Is) 69. Ezra Feinberg - Recumbent Speech 70. Davido - A Better Time 71. Hailu Mergia - Yene Mircha 72. HAIM - Women In Music Pt. III 73. Half Waif - The Caretaker 74. Key Glock - Yellow Tape 75. KeiyAa - Forever Your Girl

[sinceileftyoublog]

Nashville Ambient Ensemble Interview: A Little Help From My Friends

BY JORDAN MAINZER

“I feel like Nashville his my home,” Michael Hix said. The experimental musician, who now leads the Nashville Ambient Ensemble, is fully immersed in the ambient country scene that’s logically emerged from the fingerpicked guitar renaissance of the early 2010s. But for him, it took coming back to Tennessee to get there.

Hix grew up in Southeast Tennessee in a rural town, the closest city Chattanooga, before going to college in Nashville and staying there for a few years after. Then, like many before him, he moved to New York, exploring the various experimental music scenes thriving in the nation’s biggest city. After he and his wife had a child, they realized they needed more space and moved back to Nashville two years ago. “It’s been great to be back,” Hix said. “The avant garde and experimental/music scene--there’s always been a space for that here, but I really noticed when I moved back two years ago, it’s really grown an amazing amount. There are a lot of new people in the scene I didn’t know previously.” 

Many of those new people would end up playing with Hix in Nashville Ambient Ensemble and on their debut album Cerulean, released last month via Centripetal Force. The group--Hix on synth and keys, venerable pedal steel player Luke Schneider, pianist Kim Rueger, baritone electric guitarist Jack Silverman, singer Deli Paloma-Sisk, guitar synth player Cynthia Cárdenas, and electric guitarist Timon Kaple--came together slowly as Hix would meet the various members at shows and parties. (He knew only Kaple and Schneider before moving back to Nashville.) Once he had a group and music that embraced improvisation more heavily than any of his solo material--he calls each song “a loose constant theme and a cycle of solos”--the band rehearsed a couple times and recorded over two sessions. Their chemistry is palpable, on the arpeggiated “Ingia”, the guitar-forward title track, and swaying “Coda”. And as it turns out, having a kid also influenced Hix’s ability to let go. “Part of this project was me realizing as a parent that I didn’t have the time anymore to sweat over my solo compositions where I’d have things ornately composed down to the smallest detail,” he said. “If I called on a little help with my friends and got an ensemble environment together and relied on improvisation, I could make more music with less content.”

Speaking with Hix earlier this year over the phone, I got the sense that not just collaboration, but taking in other types of art directly seep into his creative output just as much as anything. Hix is as likely to cite ambient legend William Basinski and director Andrei Tarkovsky as formative influences as he is instrumental or experimental country music; he trades music, book, and film recommendations with passion and curiosity. With an increasingly open approach to music making, you realize how Hix and Nashville Ambient Ensemble both lead and transcend the ambient country scene highlighted by artists like Schneider and Chuck Johnson. Laying the groundwork but providing space for expression, the Nashville Ambient Ensemble could switch out members and instruments and still retain the exploratory spirit of the group and the scene.

Below, read my conversation with Hix about moving back to Nashville, starting the Ensemble, making Cerulean, and what the future holds. 

Since I Left You: When you lived in New York, did you feel isolated from the Nashville scene?

Michael Hix: Yeah, I was kind of isolated from it. In fact, when I moved to New York, I honestly didn’t see myself ever moving back to Nashville. I was planning on just staying in New York. I wasn’t really keeping up with what was going on here. I was just totally invested in the kind of music I was doing in New York. I was really surprised when I came back here that there were so many new artists doing really great work, and a pretty good, sizable experimental music community. That’s been really cool to see. I’ve been able to meet a lot of new people.

I expected that I would get back in the groove in my old circle, but I’ve met so many new people.

SILY: Of the folks in the Nashville Ambient Ensemble, how many were in your old circle, and how many were new?

MH: The only person I really knew was Timon Kaple. We went to college together, and he was in my larger circle of friends. The only other person I knew was Luke Schneider. He was just an acquaintance of mine, and we had never hung out but ran into each other when I moved back. At the time, he was starting to record his own solo, ambient, new age kind of music. We just hit it off and started to exchange music. Those two guys were the only ones I knew, and the others I met when I moved back to Nashville.

SILY: When was this group formed, and when was this music written and recorded?

MH: This took off in a crazy way. I feel like I didn’t really have to think about it very much. It happened very organically and quickly. One of the things I was struck by when I moved back to Nashville was how unique it was in how music is made here, in a really collective manner. Even if you’re not getting into a project with someone, they want to jam with you. I played one show in January 2019, and just at that first show, I had 3 or 4 people ask me if I wanted to jam or if I collaborated. That’s really representative of Nashville. That first show that I played, Timon came up to me--we hadn’t made music before--and asked to get together some time. It’s the same night I met Jack Silverman. I also met Deli Paloma-Sisk that night. She played that show as well. After that, I got together with Timon once in 2019, and I had a couple more people in that period ask me if I made music, so I thought I’d just make a supergroup. 

I had been in a similar group ensemble thing before I left Nashville, back in 2011. I was really wanting to do that again. At a certain point, I just started asking people if they were interested in an ambient ensemble. I asked Jack if he wanted to be involved, Luke, he was on board. Deli joined. The other two, Kim and Cynthia, I met Cynthia at a party one night and Deli was telling her about the project, and Cynthia asked to be in the group, and I was like, “Yeah, sure!” She has this MIDI guitar synthesizer set up. That’s what she plays on the album--really amazing. Kim Rueger, who goes by the moniker Belly Full Of Stars, I was speaking to her at a show one night asking her if she knew any pianists, and she was like, “I play piano.” It came together super organically. We had two rehearsals January 2020. These people are all really talented. We booked two days at the Battle Tapes studio in Nashville and recorded everything live in the studio in two sessions. It was really quick.

SILY: That’s a lot of lead up to a short recording process!

MH: Organizing it together took some time, but once we got everyone on board, it was really quick. I sent around some demos, we rehearsed twice, and then we recorded the album.

SILY: The opening track, “Breve”, is effective because you can hear all the elements going on, and it’s a unique hybrid of styles, the electronics with the country western instrumentals. Why did you lead off with this track, and what’s the story behind it?

MH: The pieces came together really quickly. I wrote every piece except for “Cerulean”, which was written by Jack Silverman. All the tracks I wrote came together really quickly, and it just so happened I had two that were a lot shorter than the other three, and I had the idea of bookending the album with these short tracks that serve as a prologue and an epilogue, which is why I placed “Breve” first. Knowing it was gonna be the first track and an introduction, I wanted to showcase all of the sounds in a very concise, clear way. That was kind of my direction with the track.

SILY: It’s interesting the title track is the only one not written by you!

MH: [laughs] Right.

SILY: Why did you name the album after that track?

MH: I was speaking to my wife about this, and I had a couple other ideas for album titles. She said, “Read me the names of your tracks.” We both thought that Cerulean was a really great title that was evocative but not heavy. You didn’t really have to read into it very much. It provided a tone for the album. This project was honestly about trying to get myself out of the way. I really wanted the other players involved to really shine on the album. I really liked the idea of using someone else’s [song] for the album title.

SILY: The track “Inga” seems to me to be exemplary of the mix between structure and improvisation that’s on the record. Can you talk about balancing those two aspects of the music?

MH: “Inga” and “Conversion” are probably the two examples where we achieved what we were aiming towards the most. In “Inga”, I definitely provided, to use a metaphor, the structure of the house, but everyone else made it a home. Something that had beauty in it. All of the songs, we had a very loose structure, some charts with the chord changes, but the sheet music for the songs would be a list that was just the order of the solos. I think the reason “Inga” works so well along with "Conversion” is that everyone has a solo in that song. You have the extended experience of the piece cycling through solos for each of the soloists.

The way we recorded that one, we had a loose structure of these chord changes and some from my modular synth, but the primary structure of it was the order of the solos. In the studio when we were recording, I had a microphone and would just call out whose solo was coming up next.

SILY: Why did you release “Conversion” as the first single?

MH: I thought about “Inga” for the first track, but personally, “Conversion” is generally the strongest track on the album. At the same time, I think it’s the most representative of what I wanted to achieve with the project and the concept.

SILY: What’s the inspiration behind the cover art?

MH: The cover art is a painting by Wendy Walker Silverman, who is a really great Nashville artist who is also the wife of Jack Silverman, the guitarist in the band. The cover features her painting. It’s been kind of altered by the person who designed the album art [Alethea Hall], but that is her painting there.

SILY: Are there loose plans to perform any of these songs in a live stream or socially distant show?

MH: We would definitely like to play some shows. Due to the nature of the project and the fact that every person involved has their own music projects and other things going on, it would be hard for us, once touring is a thing that happens, to go on tour. But we would like to play an album release show in Nashville once that makes sense to do so. We’ll probably wait till we can have a good amount of people attend in terms of COVID restrictions. We’ll see what happens after that and what kind of opportunities arrive for performances.

SILY: What else is next for the Ensemble?

MH: I’ll see what kind of level of interest people have in it, both listening and enjoying as well as other artists and musicians in the community here, whether anyone expresses interest in being involved. I’ve definitely already started to think about a round two and have some ideas of people I’d love to ask to be involved. I’d like to change things up a bit and get some other people and instruments involved. We’ll see: I’m not exactly sure. It was a ton of work organizing the whole thing, being a big group, and getting the recordings done. I mixed the album, so having a regular job, being a parent, and trying to carry through a project like that is a lot of work. I definitely want to do it again.

SILY: What have you been listening to, reading, and watching lately?

MH: I love the new William Basinski album Lamentations. I really loved the new compilation from Music From Memory, Virtual Dreams: Ambient Explorations In The House & Techno Age, 1993​-​1997. I just listened to a reissue from Aguirre Records from Morgan Fisher and Lol Coxhill, called Slow Music. It’s one of those albums that really didn’t get a lot of attention back then but could be considered an essential or cornerstone album for a genre of music. Morgan Fisher is a really great composer--he has a few great albums--but this is the best one I’ve heard of his. It takes some tape recordings of Lol Coxhill playing I think soprano saxophone, and he cuts the tape up and makes a composition out of the various recordings. 

I watched the films of Bi Gan: Kaili Blues and Long Day’s Journey Into Night. Both are absolutely mind-blowing. I’m a big Andrei Tarkovsky fan, and he’s a big influence on me. Bi Gan definitely has some strong Tarkovsky vibes but definitely has his own language. Long Day’s Journey Into Night was in particular amazing.

SILY: Is there anything I didn’t ask about the record you want to say?

MH: One of the things I’m most satisfied about this album is I’m almost not on it. I didn’t anticipate it, but realized it when listening to the recordings. I’m always working on trying to remove my ego as much as possible from my music, which is hard when you’re making solo music. I think William Basinski achieves that in an amazing way, and I haven’t been that effective at it. But I think it happened in the Ensemble album. There’s my modular synth sound, and I play keys, but I didn’t do any solos on the album. It was really satisfying to know that though I organized the project and wrote the music, it was the other people who shined through.

The other thing I’m happy about is that it really does have a Nashville sound, in large part because of the pedal steel, but it’s there with the other players as well. To some extent, the music does give you a flavor of what Nashville is about and what’s unique about it. There are some really great artists doing some really progressive sounds.

Cerulean by Nashville Ambient Ensemble

[ourunsungheroes42344]

1, 3 & 8 for the identity asks!

Ooo, good ones

1. If someone wanted to really understand you, what would they read, watch, and listen to?

Read: The Warrior Cats Series by Erin Hunter. 

I’ve been reading them for basically all my life (still do, to this day) and they really helped shape me as a writer, cat lover, and creative person

Watch: Charmed (98)

This was the first show (that wasn’t a kids show lol) that I can remember watching from well probably too young tbh. I have vivid memories of coming home from school & watching while my mom folded laundry. I saw bits and pieces of the show many times before watching all the way through around the 8th grade & it struck me in a way it never had before, particularly Season 6. This led me to begin writing fanfiction and led me to an online community as well as an IRL one.

Listen: This is a tricky one...I can’t pick 1 artist or genre or song.

I’ve always loved music in general, I was in choir and orchestra at one point or another in school & have always found a way to express or understand myself & my feelings through music. My music tastes now are vastly different from those of my childhood, or even comparing this year to last and the year before that. I have a very eclectic taste in music, part in thanks to my parents, drama club, fandom, and just music I’ve found on my own. Spanning rock, country, pop, musicals, alternative, folk, and more. From songs from the 50s to Today. 

To understand me right now, I would recommend:

Any song from the last two Taylor Swift Albums - folklore & evermore

Any song by The Amazing Devil

Flawed Design by Stabilo

Basically all Classic Rock (think Supernatural Soundtrack)

Or just ask & I’ll link you to my Spotify

3. List your fandoms and one character from each that you identify with.

For the sake of time & my tendency to ramble I’m just going to list my top 5 fandoms (in no particular order) right now without explanations - although, I’m more than happy to do a follow up to any of said characters/fandoms with the Why

Charmed - Chris Halliwell

Eureka - Jo Lupo

The Witcher - Jaskier

Castle - Kevin Ryan

Supernatural - Dean Winchester

8. What musical artists have you most felt connected to over your lifetime?

Well, shoot, music ones always get me into trouble - I’ll try to be brief :)

Journey - I grew up listening to Journey with my parents & as a Detroit Red Wings fan - Don’t Stop Believin is my jam

Shawn Mendes - more songs than others, but I’ve enjoyed 90% of all his songs & some of his older stuff spoke to me as a growing teenager

Taylor Swift - mainly her last 4 albums, but I also grew up on her country songs

The Amazing Devil - newer discovery, but I am completely in love with the sound of their music and find myself listening to it most often when I am out walking in the woods, which is something I enjoy quite a bit

The Script - I’m Irish. They’re Irish. Also, more than that, their songs all have a very unique sound to them that I love

Thirty Seconds to Mars - I found 30StM during the height of my first Charmed obsession, back in the 7th or 8th grade, when I was first starting to listen to music on my own, separate from my family, and it was unlike anything I’d listened to before & for some reason it stuck & has stayed around, even now.

This was a lot of fun! Thanks for asking!

[dherzogblog]

songs/20

Happy Holidays Everyone! I started making these yearly playlists in 2001 as an attempt to connect with friends in the wake of 911. It was just before the dawn of ITunes, and way before social media. We were not in touch like we are today. I burned dozens of individual cd’s one at a time, printed up customized jewel case covers and snail mailed them all out. It was an annual month-long labor of love. Over the past few years, streaming music has made it much easier and faster to compile and distribute, and frankly much more fun. I still look forward to putting the playlist and blog together and sharing it with all of you. Particularly this year as it gives me a chance to connect with so many friends I haven’t seen in quite some time. It was a tremendously challenging year for all of us. I was grateful to have had my family here in LA the entire time, we remain healthy and well. The west coast Herzogs know just how lucky we have been. The next year will not be without its own challenges, but I'm hopeful we are able to move past this pandemic and the exhausting events of the past 4. More than that, I look forward to seeing each and every one of you in 2021. Until then, be safe, be well, and be good to one another. Enjoy the music.

ox peace, dh

Los Angeles CA. December 2020

Khruangbin - Time (You And I) Don’t ask me to pronounce the name of this eclectic trio from Texas, but this dubby disco tune had me returning to its chilled out groove often during the last few decidedly “un-chill” months. Dreamy and funky, the groove takes me back to NYC’s early 80′s club scene and Ze Records releases from the likes of Kid Creole and Coati Mundi.

Anderson .Paak- Lockdown Scenes from the front, June 2020

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Bill Withers (1938-2020)- Use Me The legendary Bill Withers left the playing field at the top of his game in the early 80′s, hardly heard from again. And while he didn't pass from Covid, his healing pop hymn Lean On Me seemed to be everywhere as people found music to help them cope with the challenges of the pandemic. Withers left behind a legendary and enduring group of hit songs that moved easily from soul to folk to pop, not to mention the subtle rolling funk of this one.

Black Pumas- Fire Strong debut from an unlikely Austin duo that garnerd both buzz and grammy nods. The critics are calling it “psychedelic soul”. Not quite sure that nails it, but like the artists coming up next, they’re carving out new ground while drawing inspiration from classic sources.

Gabe Lee- Babylon

Marcus King- Wildflowers and Wine

Charley Crockett- Welcome to Hard Times

Three artists that are literally changing the face of Country and Americana music. Soulful, authentic and diverse, reaching back for inspiration but always looking forward. If you like this sort of stuff they are all worth checking out. Each album is filled with quality songs.

Low Cut Connie_ Private Lives Philly’s Low Cut Connie are back at it with a double album that plays like the soundtrack to a boozy night at your favorite bar. Sweaty, funky and not a little bit messy. If Peter Wolf and Bruce had a kid it would be this blue eyed soul boy. Adam Weiner grew up in the shadow of the Jersey shore and can't help but have a bit of that E Street hustle.

Willie Nile- New York at Night One of New York’s beloved adopted  son’s dropped this love letter right into the jaws of a battered metropolis driven to its knees by the pandemic. It was heartbreaking to listen as the “city that never sleeps” came to a full stop. Somehow I still found myself coming back to it, imagining night’s ahead, when NYC is back on its feet and I’m roaming its streets. Looking for music, a beer, or maybe just a slice, and fueled by the irreplaceable energy and promise of the greatest city on earth.

The Long Ryders- Down to The Well Americana pioneers the Long Ryders reunited last year for a surprisingly solid album. This single sounds like it could have been recorded during their 80′s heyday featuring their trademark Byrds like jangle and harmonies, but the lyrics mark this song as unmistakably 2020.

The Speedways- Kisses Are History UK power pop outfit reach back to the the 60′s on this sweet slice of retro pop perfection.

Billie Joe Armstrong- That Thing You Do

In the early days of the pandemic we had all our kids (+ a significant other) at our house for a few months. It worked out great and we were luckier than most. The biggest issue was keeping enough food, weed and wine around.  There were some great nights with amazing meals, followed by gathering around the TV together. We re-watched The Sopranos, binged Billy On The Street, and revisited some of our favorite movies. One night we went back to a old family favorite, Tom Hanks’ underrated love letter to the one hit wonders of the post Beatles era, That Thing You Do!  I’ve seen the movie several times and it never fails to please. A true feel good film and a perfect Kodak snapshot capturing a simpler time in American pop culture. 

While we watch the unlikely chart topper’s The Oneders  fizzle as fast as they rose to fame, its not really the point. The movie is really an old fashioned love story. Playing like a perfect hit song you can listen to over and over, full of both hooks and heart. I always thought the title track, written by Fountains Of Wayne leader Adam Schlesinger  (who we lost to Covid), brilliantly captured the British Invasion sound every group wanted after The Beatles stormed America. Green Day’s Billie Joe Armstrong must agree. During the pandemic he cut an album’s worth of cool covers including a faithful version of this one.

Gerard Way (W/Judith Hill - Here Comes the End A tale of discovering music in 2020:  Heard this on a Netflix trailer for the series The Umbrella Factory. Turns out it is performed by Gerard Way (My Chemical Romance) who also writes the comic book the series is based on. (got all that?) He’s joined on this searing garage/psych rave up by the talented and versatile Judith Hill doing her best Merry Clayton.

Hinds- Spanish Bombs I’ve been following this Madrid based, all female outfit of punky garage rockers for a few years now. I think they are pretty great. This track, recorded for a Joe Strummer tribute bursts with an unbridled joy the stone faced and politically minded Clash could never muster. I bet Joe would love it though

The Secret Sisters- Hand Over My Heart Have enjoyed their harmonies for some time now. This one gives me vague Wilson Phillips vibes and I don’t really mind. 

Tame Impala- Breathe Deeper I know I’m supposed to like this guy, all the cool kids do, I’ve even seen the band at Coachella. Over the years very little of the music has stuck to me, but the pandemic offered a bit more free time to dig into this funky dubby, chilled out jam, and it stuck with me. Not to mention that 2020 was all about deep breaths.

Ledisi (feat.Corey Henry)- What Kind of Love Is That Ledisi is back with some slinky, sultry R&B and jazzy vocals

Dinner Party- FreezeTag An R&B/Jazz collective featuring Terrace Martin, Robert Glasper, 9th Wonder and Kamasi Washington use sweet soul on heartbreaking and all too familiar tale..

Toots and The Maytals- Time Tough  I’ve written an awful lot about my love for Reggae over the years. Right after Bob Marley kicked the door down for me, Toots showed me around the house. Ska, rock steady, and roots. He was true reggae royalty and sadly we lost him to Covid, just after he released what would be his last album. Check my Toots tribute blog and playlist.

Mungo’s Hi Fi- The Beat Goes SKA! These clever UK roots reggae collective never fail to surprise. This kitschy Sonny & Cher cover managed to make me smile every time I heard it. No mean feat in 2020

Stone Foundation (feat. Durand Jones)- Hold on To Love Frequent collaborators with Paul Weller  (he appears on a track on the album), Stone Foundation are back with another batch of their UK soul revival stylings. This one features Durand Jones ( of Durand Jones & The Indications) on vocals and some great reggae style horns at the top.

The Pretenders- You Can’t Hurt A Fool Can’t resist a good torch song, especially sung by the smokey voiced Chrissie Hynde. Was kind of shocked at how many good songs were on this album.

Shelby Lynne_ Don’t Even Believe in Love Sultry country soul and one of her strongest albums in awhile.

Jaime Wyatt- Neon Cross Outlaw country has a new bad girl. And in case you didn’t think she was serious, she enlisted producer Shooter Jennings (and his mom Jessi Colter on one track) to help make her point. 

Daniel Donato- Justice 25 year old guitar prodigy call his music “cosmic country”.  Ok, now I’m listening. You should be too.

The Jayhawks- This Forgotten Town 30 plus + after their debut this Twin Cities alt country group led by founding member Gary Louris continue to deliver. They find their inner Neil Young on this one.

Lucero- Time To Go Home God I wish I was in a bar right now listening to this, even if I might be crying in my beer.

John Prine (1946 -2020)- Lake Marie We lost so many this year, but this one really stung. A true American songwriting treasure, who was still making great music against all odds right up to his untimely passing. His songs are known for their simplicity, and economy of words. but this one goes against the grain. I’m still not exactly certain what it’s about. Sorrowful and haunting, yet somehow uplifting and redemptive. I heard him perform it live here in Los Angeles a just over a year ago and it has stuck in my head ever since. There is surely a place in heaven for the great John Prine.  He sang about it on his final studio album in 2018. Ironically it became the last song on his last record.

Thanks for making it this far....

***Play the entire songs/20 Spotify playlist HERE!***