#that 12 year old hunger man | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

monsterloverxxx · 6 months ago

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Minotaur x fem!reader

Plus sized Minotaur

MDNI

POV you have been sent into the minotaur’s labyrinth as a sacrifice, but your offering isn’t one of blood.

Monster-fucking/teratophilia, breeding kink/pregnancy kink, size kink/macrophilia.

Groping, fingering, repeated PiV sex, pushing cum back in, some dom/sub dynamic.

Horror, gore

Dub-con (some non-con groping and grinding, wanted sex and consent but you’ve been put in that situation)

2080 words

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Offering to the Minotaur:

Nobody knows how long the beast has cursed them, some say he has been there since the beginning of civilisation, others the dawn of time; either way he has always hunted these lands.

Mostly he hibernates; but every time the fire-star lights up the inky sky he awakens for 12 moons. An insatiable hunger to consume controls him, a bloodlust only slaughter can satisfy.

To contain his devastation the leaders of these lands long ago decided to gift him sacrifices, offerings to an old brutal god. Innocent souls sent to death to appeal to the mercy of the monster; a barter for their people to be spared.

You look up at the crimson glow in the night, an omen for the blood that would soon spill from your veins. Praying to your deities will do no good, you will soon join them in the heavens and drink moonbeams from golden chalices.

It is dark and cold inside the labyrinth; you can feel the chill in your bones; or perhaps what you feel is fear, terror that curdles your insides.

Tall walls once white marble are now green with slime, moss and mushrooms growing on water that has degraded stone for thousands of years.

It is a maze, and you are already lost. You feel trapped, claustrophobic yet overwhelmed by the infinite expanse. Each step cannot be distinguished from the last, you are roaming in endless circles.

Your legs ache from running, the breath inside your chest burns, your heart pounding. There is nowhere to go, nowhere to hide. You turn every corner aimlessly, hoping it will not be your last.

You could hear the others, their echoed footsteps like ghosts, screams of terror and cracks of bones as they were butchered one by one. But now you hear only deafening silence, you know you're the last one standing, it’s your turn to die.

You slip and land on jagged rocks, broken off ruins. Smearing mud on the bottom of your white dress and scraping your tired knees. As you pull yourself up you see him looming over you. Eight foot tall, the head of a strawberry bull, torso of a burly fat man and solid cloven hooves.

You’re frozen in fear, your brain screaming for you to retreat but your body unable to follow. He grabs you and picks you up like a ragdoll, throwing you over his shoulder. The ground is so far below you if he dropped you, you would crack.

“Please don’t kill me” you beg over and over, tears flowing down your cheeks onto his hairy naked back.

“Your offering is flesh” he responded in a deep leather voice as he carries you to his lair

You try so much to wriggle your way out of his arms, even though you know the fall will maim you.

He grabs you around your ass to keep hold of you, his big hands up your dress gripping your underwear. You still try to escape his grasp; but how his hand rubs up against you when you move, you don’t want to admit how that feels.

You believe he’s going to feast upon you. Cook you in a stew with the others, suck sweet meat off your bones, drink your brains out of your severed skull. You pray he would kill you first.

He throws you down onto a pile of straw and furs: his nest. Your head rings from the impact, your bones jolting.

Before you can crawl away, he hops in beside you. He snuggles up next to you pulling you into him, enveloping your body completely with his, his fur and fat keeping you heated. Your face is nestled into his sweaty chest, he smells like rot, the scent of the slain is suffocating.

You wonder if he did this to the others? Gifted them comfort before pulling them limb from limb and devouring their bodies?

He falls asleep cuddling you, snoring loudly. You try to worm out multiple times to no avail. Eventually you give into his soft warmth and fall asleep. How can a creature so brutal feel so plush and tender?

Even though you have no sense of time your body wakes up naturally to the dawn. So had he, you glance around the room, he is nowhere to be seen. Part of you misses his embrace but this was your chance to delay your inevitable end.

You get up and flee his throne room, bolting as fast as your bruised legs can take you. But you do not get far before you need to stop and catch your breath.

As you lean against bloodstained bricks, you can hear him charging you, a great thunderous sound of hooves. He snatches you up, swooping you into the air and over his shoulder once more.

You know it is over now, this was the conclusion of your life, you give up. There’s no point fighting anymore, ‘just kill me quick’ you think, at least grant you that.

He places you back onto the nest gently this time “Stay” he orders

You will.

“Eat” he demands hurling you a bone; you didn’t want to know what it came from or who.

“I’m not hungry” you lie, you are famished but not desperate enough

“Eat” he repeats again “You’ll need the energy”

“For what? So you can hunt me like a hound?” you ask

“No” he responds.

He locks a metal collar around your neck attached to a short chain “Stay, I will return, then you eat, you need energy”

As soon as he leaves you pull at the metal, it is taut and chaffing, rust from many hundreds of years crumbles off in red chunks. You don’t try to get it off, you don’t have the strength.

You wait for him patiently. It is probably close to dusk when the beast returns dragging a deer carcass behind him. The stag's mighty antlers scraped along dirt.

He tears its body apart like it is a simple piece of bread, guts spilling everywhere. He cooks it over flame and feeds it to you. You are ravenous gorging yourself on its flesh like he had done to your fellow sacrifices.

When you are done, he climbs back into his furs again and wraps you up once more. But this time is different, he isn’t there to rest, he craves another thing.

You can feel something pressed up against you, you recognise it. You realise what your purpose is, what he wants from you: something warm and tight for him.

He grinds into the outline of your ass, his face is nowhere near you, but you could hear huffed breaths from his bull ringed nostrils. The way it drags into you sends shivers through your body.

“What is my offering?” you ask

“You are a priestess” he responded petting your messy hair “Your body a vessel for the gods. I am your god.”

“Vessel for what?”

“My pleasure and my offspring” he answered

Your flesh wasn’t to consume, it was to use and abuse, to play with like a toy.

He pushes his hand up your dress, it brushes slowly against your skin, up your body until he roughly grabs one of your breasts, fondling it callously, you can’t help but sigh at his touch.

The white dress that hugs your curves so well, you now see is a wedding gown. You had been gifted as his wife, a slave to him, for his arcane desires.

Your fate is not to dance in the clouds to songs of starlight harps, it is to be split open night after night by a monster's cock, to birth his demonic calves.

He shoves you onto your back and hangs over you, he is massive compared to you, a giant. He grabs the top of your dress and rips it in half, stripping you down, naked and exposed for him.

You are scared yes, but part of you tingles, the wet between your thighs could not lie. He is a beast, he was going to tear your body apart from the inside out, but you have not felt the touch of a man since you had committed to the temple, and oh gods was he a man.

He removes his loincloth; you can’t help but stare at his magnificence. You feel a feral hunger for that huge thick rod hung between muscular legs, hard as the stone around you, dripping with tears of yearning.

“I want to mate with you my little priestess” he strokes your face; his hand is the size of your head.

You don’t know if that is a question or a statement, either way you aren’t going to try and stop him. Maybe it would kill you, but maybe it is worth the risk just to feel him inside you.

“Yes” you responded

“Beg” he ordered “Beg for your god to take you, beg for him to fill you with his seed”

“Please” you plead, pathetic “Please breed me, I am your toy, I am your slave, please use me, please ruin me, I want it so bad, I need you so bad, please”

“Good girl” he grabs you by the hips and flips you over pushing your face into his animal skins. He spreads your legs open as wide as they could go revealing the sweetness between them. He runs a large finger through your folds, gathering slick as lubrication, forcing it inside. You gasp at the penetration followed by soft mewls as he pushes it in and out, going down to his knuckles, checking how much you can take. If this is how good his hand felt, you salivate at the idea of what would come next.

You are so hungry for it by the time he pushes the head to your entrance. He struggles to fit, but he is not gentle, ramming it inside of you with great force skewering your tight cunt. He did not take time to get you used to his size slamming straight into your cervix. White hot pain clouds your head but is soon replaced with carnal ecstasy as he pulls most of the way out and rhythmically thrusts into you.

You take him so well, your walls stretching around him. It’s like your cunt is designed for his cock, the god’s constructing your body specifically for your beast husband, perhaps he had created you for this use. You do not care; you are happy with this fate.

He continues to rail into you, holding your body firm so he doesn’t break your small frame. You are full of him but only half of his shaft is inside. He wishes he could fully stuff you, that he could bottom out inside and his balls could feel your heat as well. But he has stretched you fully out, you cannot physically take any more of him, but he can still try.

He fucks you for what feels like eternity, your body and mind in the heavens. Both of your loud moans are a symphony, a song of lust for only the spirits to hear. Your eyes roll back as your walls squeeze so hard around him, he can’t stop himself from filling you up. His seed drools down your thighs as he pulls out of your spent hole. He catches it with his fingers and pushes it back inside to save it.

His digits in your bruised entrance stings, but when you whine, he starts fingering you again. You rock into his hand, 2, 3, 5 fingers work you open. His own cum escapes down his arm onto the straw.

He trades his hand with his meat again swollen from your arousal, pounding it into you until he has replaced his wasted sperm.

He takes you over and over, again and again, so many times you lose count. Your body is jelly, your mind mush, your pussy is throbbing. He stops only when you pass out from exhaustion, and you fall asleep nuzzled in him.

And then when you wake, he starts again, he’ll keep going until he knows you are with child, carrying his young. And he will use you for his pleasure until he hibernates once more. Maybe he will gift you immortality so you can be his wife for eternity, or maybe he’ll dispose of you when he grows sick of your pussy and your womb, you do not know...

#monster fucker #monster fudger #monster fuqqer #monster lover #terat0philliac #terato #monster smut #exophelia #minotaur #minotaur smut #macrophilia #fem!reader #minotaur x human #minotaur x reader #dubc0n #fatboy #fat belly #18+ mdni

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kiss-me-muchoo · 11 days ago

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𝐰𝐚𝐧𝐭 𝐦𝐲 𝐡𝐞𝐚𝐫𝐭 𝐭𝐨 𝐛𝐞 𝐛𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐤𝐢𝐧’ || 𝐂𝐨𝐫𝐢𝐨𝐥𝐚𝐧𝐮𝐬 𝐒𝐧𝐨𝐰 𝐱 𝐟𝐞𝐦!𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐫

Summary_ where you follow Coriolanus to his exile, he asks you to marry him and have a life in the districts, but you find a notebook from Lucy Gray, with an specific lyrics of a song, discovering Coriolanus probably never truly loved you, but her.

Warnings_ angst, fluff, NSFW content, oral (f receiving), implied PIV sex, love triangle, Lucy Gray is slightly mean but we love her,

Notes_ pls listen along skin from Sabrina Carpenter <3

♪ ♫ Coryo playlist ✰ Index (+ fics here)

He was your love, your soulmate, your eternal companion.

Coriolanus and Tigris Snow found you as a little child in the streets during the war. You grew up with them. You worked scavenging to sell and make money. Coriolanus stated that he loved you when you two were nine years old. He made you his girlfriend the summer before starting senior year at the academy.

His exile made you a mess of tears, but you promised to follow him. Because you couldn’t leave him alone. Even worse when you had zero answers and there was an apartment debt.

You weren’t expecting any luck in the twelve. It was far from the Capitol and the less fortunate district. The streets were full of vendors who were willing to trade anything for a loaf of bread. And the people weren’t the kindest, especially when you arrived with two big suitcases and a silk dress with a fur coat. You screamed Capitol, and they didn’t like you.

For a long time, during your early days as a teenager, you and Coriolanus would go back to your house. It had been extremely difficult to gather your surviving belongings and search for items that would make enough money to survive the week. Your mother’s clothing had done everything to make you look like you weren’t hiding any financial issues. And your father’s suits helped to put a great impression on Coriolanus. The Hunger Games seemed to be what you two desperately needed. But things didn’t work in your favor.

The following morning after the games, when you woke up, Coriolanus was gone. He kissed you goodnight and went to sleep. Tigris told you everything and you quickly tried to contact your boyfriend but it didn’t work out.

In spite of desperation, you found a job at District 12, as a novice nurse. You quickly passed the test that proved you could defend yourself in the medical branch and after a signature, you were on your way to the twelve.

Without the prize, the chance to go to University was gone, you told your friends that Coriolanus and you decided to serve the nation and they believed it.

You walked through the savage streets of the poorest district of Panem, hoping to see your man. Under the military, he would be unlikely to have free time.

But to your luck, you heard his voice somewhere in the crowd.

“CORYO!” You screamed once you saw his broad shoulders walking in the opposite direction from you. He turned confused, but soon after spotted you and his eyes widened in surprise.

He started walking towards you, leaving behind his friends who also looked confused.

But you didn’t care, your smile grew and you started running towards him.

In his peacekeeper uniform and sweaty forehead, he looked gorgeous. And then you realized his hair was gone.

You collided in his chest and his strong arms embraced your waist, making you notice that had also gained muscle.

He was shocked, but all his moodiness from the Mockingjay hunt evaporated as soon as he reached you.

Just seconds after being in each other’s arms, he kissed you so desperately and you reciprocated with passion that ended up in a messy and addicting kiss.

Soon the two of you remembered you were in the middle of the street and that his friends were looking at you, loudly gossiping about the scene. You spotted Sejanus and smiled at him after he waved at you happily.

“You’re here,” he said surprised.

“Your curls are gone!” you replied and Coriolanus chuckled, kissing your forehead.

“Why are you here?” He asked this time. You sighed, cradling his face briefly.

“You kissed me goodnight and the next morning you were gone,” you say keeping a low tone that he appreciates.

“I didn’t want to hurt you. Sending you to bed knowing I would be gone? I know it would have cost you” he said, and you nodded.

“Tigris told me everything. With the debts and us not having the chance to attend university, I found a job at the local clinic. I will send money home and I could also be with you” he frowns.

“With your name, you could’ve asked for a loan. You could’ve asked for a job with Pluribus. Why didn’t you do that?” He asked taking your hand. You didn’t have to follow him. You could’ve stayed at the Capitol, not having to give up on much.

“What was the point if I wouldn’t have my love with me?” He can’t hide his smile. He feels lucky and proud that he already has a fine woman who loves him to death.

Then Coriolanus feels guilty because the reason he chose the twelve was because of Lucy Gray. He loved you, but there was something about his songbird that had enchanted him. Either way, you were here and he knew everything would be easier.

You smile back at him and he has to resist the urge to kiss you again.

“Come, I’ll present you to my friends and Sejanus who you already know” You nod, accepting the hand he offered you.

At that moment, Coriolanus felt relieved he had decided to keep whatever he had with Lucy Gray secret. Sejanus said he expected Coriolanus to respect you and not play with two girls, and so he should.

But no one said it would be easy.

…

Words well used solved as much as money did. The headmistress nurse already loved you, saying you were the most modest novice she’d ever had in her 35 years of experience. The way you usually spoke gave you many advantages upon your arrival in District 12. You got your own room, it was a little cottage. But it was your own.

Your schedule had you three days near the barracks where Coriolanus was able to sneak to be with you. The first weeks you couldn’t be with him during the weekends. You had to pass many tests and receive training.

Soon you fall into a routine that makes you question if that was it. Was there a future with Coriolanus in the wilderness of District 12?

The question is soon forgotten because Molly; one of your housemates knocked on your door. She had green eyes and gorgeous hair, like melted carrots. Usually sweet and loyal, she quickly became your friend. Molly came from District 2 and had gotten along Sejanus very well. Hence why she appeared early at your door with an indigo dress and red lipstick.

“Goodness! Where did you get that lipstick?” The girl grinned and showed her hands, full of cosmetics that almost made you gag.

“At the black market. I even got to pick shades” You picked a brick-toned lipstick and some smoked brown eyeshadows.

“Can I use these?” Molly nodded excitedly.

“Sure. We’ll share them. Next time you go and pick other shades if they have more” You never had a female friend like Molly. Capitol girls were colder, usually envious of minor matters, and unreliable. Anyhow, you considered most girls in your class family. Especially Clemensia Dovecote. She was close to you and Coriolanus, and if you had had more time, you would’ve confessed the truth to her.

Either way, you would be where you were, getting ready to have dinner with Coriolanus, Sejanus, and Molly as a double date. Sejanus was sweet enough to trade some of his ma’s treats in exchange for dollars and afford dinner. However, Molly and you were to pay entrance to the Hob with your first payment. Of course, you sent more than half of it to Tigris and Grandma’am.

“Look at you!” Molly made you twirl around her finger and made you laugh.

“You look lovely, y/n”

“And what about you?” She rolled her eyes playfully and proceeded to open the door for you.

The dress Tigris made for your seventeen birthday was pastel pink, but over the years collected dust and just hours before you left the Capitol she had dyed crimson with wine and other things her boss; Fabricia, had wasted. And now, it seemed to be a matter of attention in the twelve. Many girls turned to look at you and men did too.

However, you only had eyes for the blonde who waited for you at the entrance of the rustic cabin that served as a restaurant. His eyes sparkled and smiled at the sight of you.

“Hey, you…” you greeted, putting your arms around his neck. He chuckled, giving you a quick kiss.

“Hey, love” Both of them smiled at each other like idiots before Molly pulled you two inside the restaurant.

It was busy, full of peacekeepers and their wives. However, nobody paid attention to the two lower-ranking boys with their dates.

Since the pockets weren’t full enough to have a full dinner, Coriolanus and you shared a steak with mashed potatoes, gravy, and chunks of vegetables. Molly had soup with bread and Sejanus too.

You suddenly felt happy. You forgot you once had a life at the Capitol. You just lived the moment and realized it wasn’t as bad as you thought it was going to be. As long as you had Coriolanus by your side.

Soon after having dinner, Sejanus traded some of his ma’s treats and let you, Molly, Coriolanus, Beanpole, and Smiley to get inside the Hob. A bottle of white liquor appeared and everyone started drinking. Deep inside you, there was a kindred alcoholic who craved feeling light as a feather and acting silly.

Feeling tipsy, you barely notice the Covey and Lucy Gray entering the stage with an olive dress and dark blue makeup. Coriolanus stares at the songbird and soon he reminds the promises he made to the girl. He knows it’s too late to turn away. Lucy Gray had seen him with you. She seemed surprised but quickly looked away to talk to the audience and start singing.

Deep in the woods,

there was a girl.

Whom love thought she would find.

At the river,

she thought to have it found.

What a shame it was set to stall.

By crimson red,

her heart was paint.

One kind didn’t work out.

Then another came compliant,

And promised her good things.

Coriolanus soon realized Lucy Gray was probably talking about his failed relationship with Billy Taupe and now with him. But when did she write that song? The last time he saw her, was days before you came to the twelve. Perhaps Barb Azure or Maude Ivory were around and once saw him with you.

First was the river to plague with fright.

Then the bitter taste of treason,

Soon swallowed her that night.

If the girl haunts by the winter season,

Was cause’ love,

Would never be hers.

Deep in the woods,

there was a girl.

Whom love thought she would find.

At the river,

she thought to have it found.

What a shame it was set to stall.

But how could Coriolanus Snow choose Lucy Gray Baird when he had you there spinning in a gorgeous dress made by Tigris, with hot cheeks and disheveled hair, acting silly because you were slightly drunk. He knew he had to talk to Lucy Gray, but not at that moment. He was drunk as well, completely conscious but feeling like he could laugh at anything. So he went straight to his girl and gave her a big kiss on the lips.

His mates from the base cheered surprised to see him act so freely. But he couldn’t care less. Even if Commander Hoff appeared at that moment, nothing could take away the happiness he felt when you kissed him back.

A singer watched from afar and her voice creaked a little after the next song. Lucy Gray knew Coriolanus was trouble. He was Capitol and she was a free spirit. She also knew he had a girlfriend. But she thought that was over when he appeared weeks ago at the same place she was watching him kissing you.

And she couldn’t judge him. You were beautiful, looked sweet, and like you were immensely in love with Coriolanus. It broke her heart but she wouldn’t disturb her mind with that during a presentation. And when Lucy Gray focused on the public again, while singing, she also noticed you and Coriolanus had disappeared.

…

Nobody noticed when you two sneaked out of the Hob near midnight. Coriolanus and you had to stop at every block to kiss a little and then proceed to continue walking while holding hands and giggling. He was supposed to go back to the base but you begged him to spend the night with you.

Through stolen kisses and chuckles, you stumbled upon your door, quickly unlocked it, and pushed Coriolanus inside.

As soon as your hands locked you two in, you had your boyfriend starving for your touch.

“Coryo…” you whispered, urging him to lead the way to the creaky bed.

He understood, as always. His strong arms embraced you, caressing your hips and applying just the perfect amount of pressure that made you gasp in between kisses.

When your back landed on the mattress, you realized your legs had opened to accommodate him in between.

“You’re so fine, sweetheart” you had to giggle, knowing he was keeping many thoughts to himself.

“You sleep in the barracks, baby. I know you’ve grown a dirty mouth” his eyes widened, surprised to hear you say things like that. But it was true, Coriolanus had learned too many things he had no idea before. He understood men in the districts were wilder and dirtier. And he had to accept he had wondered with you included.

“How do you know?” You smirked kissing him again. Brushing your leg with his tent playfully.

“Because the districts are full of starved men.” he smiled.

Grinding each other with clothes on was all you’ve ever done. But now things felt different. Now you were kids assuming the role of adults. Both working, and both are being treated no longer as Capitol kids.

“Wait-… y/n. I don’t have any protection…” The least you needed now was bringing a kid into the world. You agreed, but you couldn’t help but sigh in annoyance.

Both of you stay quiet for a couple of seconds but Coriolanus caressed your waist, his mind busy.

“At the barracks, some of the guys have said something about tasting women…” your cheeks went hot, your legs squirmed together and Coriolanus noticed.

“Come here…” he turned you, making you sit on his lap.

“Sit on top of me”

“What?” He chuckled, grabbing your hips with possession.

“Don’t be shy, dear”

With continuous midnight sighs, your clothes flew away, and your hair ended up sticking to your forehead as you layer spread with Coriolanus in front of you. One hand working on your soaping folds and the other on his own pleasure.

The darkness of the room made it bearable due to heating even in the middle of the night. Molly and Sejanus never returned so what would stop you and your man from enjoying some time together?

He should’ve been sleeping at the barracks and you getting rid of the sinful evidence marking your sheets, hoping that the headmistress nurse wouldn’t notice. But there you were, moaning your boyfriend’s name like a mantra.

Which didn’t stop until a couple of hours before the sunrise.

…

Never in your wildest dreams, you thought you could’ve considered yourself happy at the districts. But you were.

Growing up with Coriolanus had always made you feel safe. But for some time you felt like you actually lived for each other.

Coriolanus was busy during the week, sometimes he wasn’t available on Saturdays, but mostly every day he made at least ten minutes to visit you at the clinic and see how your day was going.

To wear the nurse uniform during the summer was a dare. Long sleeves, aprons, tights, and heel shoes, are not the most comfortable.

But you grew used to it, especially when you worked at the labs and curation department.

Someone knocked on the door and soon it was opened, revealing Smiley, Beanpole, Sejanus, and lastly, Coriolanus.

“Gentlemen, What can I do for you?” You greeted them with a smile.

“A little accident during training. But mostly, we did a favor to your man” Beanpole said and you smiled even more.

Coriolanus offered you a playful smirk which made you blush.

“Well come in. Let me grab my kit” They started talking among each other but Coriolanus went straight to you.

“Rough day at the base?” The man nodded at you.

“At least Commander Hoff doesn’t hate me as much as old High-as-a-Kite-Bottom did”

you chuckle. But it doesn’t go unnoticed by you to see the way Coriolanus scratched his neck and arms.

“You caught an eczema flare up…”

“A rash?” You giggle at him. Coriolanus can’t help but think that you truly were learning medical stuff. You quickly had sutured Smiley’s finger and you rapidly knew what medicine would help Sejanus pollen allergy.

“Yes, a rash, Coryo. Take off your shirt, please” he obeyed.

When he turned around, he felt your fingers trailing the scars of the bombing. You had been taken away before you could know what had happened. Your tribute was killed for trying to escape. Soon you learn that Lucy Gray has saved Coriolanus’ life. You thanked her mentally. But you disliked the way Coriolanus couldn’t stop asking about her as soon as he woke up. Neither did the fact that his mother’s compact had disappeared from his room.

That’s forgotten when you start applying cream across the flare-up from his skin. He sighed in relief.

“I doubt there’s much hot water at the barracks but only take cold showers. That helps”

“Thanks, love” you nodded, kissing his cheek.

Coriolanus had his eyes set on you. He looked at your working hands cleaning the equipment you used, then to your parted lips demonstrating how concentrated you look. He smiled, only having you on his mind at the moment.

“I took the aptitude test to become an official” You dropped the tools, a smile growing on your face.

“Coryo! That’s great news, dear” you said excitedly, hurrying to embrace him.

“I would be able to move out of the barracks. We can get a little house with our incomes and you know… get married. Maybe some kids will run around our property. Who knows?…” your face blush but you can only nod.

You hug him even more tightly and he has to chuckle at your excitement.

“I’d love that…”

Coriolanus soon remembered his songbird and he had to seize the urge to seize. He had been with her as well. And nothing happened beyond stolen kisses and empty promises but still. It was cheating on you.

…

A little a week after Coriolanus applied to become an officer, Commander Hoff implied he had a great chance to pass the test. That made the boy very happy. He even told Tigris in a letter he would send more money, as well as the news he was going to break out that night to you. He couldn’t even remember he was supposed to meet Lucy Gray at The Covey’s cabin. He went straight to take a shower and couldn’t say no to Sejanus offering him one of his best shirts.

The Hob was full as usual. Drunk people everywhere. When Coriolanus entered The Covey was in their “backstage”, he sneaked through the hordes of people dancing because couldn’t risk letting you or Molly see him.

Lucy Gray had a gorgeous light brown dress with shiny makeup. She was drinking water when she spotted Coriolanus and smiled.

“Hey, I wasn’t expecting to see you now” she explained, walking towards him.

To be honest, Coriolanus wasn’t sure why he was there. But he was sure he had to talk to Lucy Gray before even seeing you again.

“Yeah. I wanted to talk to you…” her eyes sparkled with hope. Poor songbird.

“Sure. Spit it out…”

“I think you know by now that we work better as friends,” Coriolanus said.

“Oh”

The truth was that they were opposites. Even if you had broken up with Coriolanus for any reason and they decided to try it out seriously, they weren’t compatible. Lucy Gray wanted to be a free spirit and she thought too much about the people. Coriolanus mostly agreed with the Capitol and he firstly loved another woman. One who thought the same way he did.

“She really is the one. Right?” Lucy Gray questioned, obviously referring to you.

“I don’t want to hurt you, Lucy Gray”

“Oh but you already did”

“Yes, I should’ve told you what happened. But to be fair I didn’t even know myself. Can we be just friends?” He sounded tired and even a little desperate.

Lucy Gray frowned. She valued trust more than anything, he had broken that. But she played her best face and smiled.

“Sure. Friends…”

Coriolanus nodded, knowing things had turned slightly awkward.

Soon he was back and finally in your arms.

He had to start drinking, both of you sharing a bottle that quickly was empty.

You couldn’t stop laughing. Coriolanus was spinning you, holding you in his strong arms, leaving wet kisses all across your face, and being freely lovable.

You didn’t notice The Covey playing. You forgot about your worries and everything.

Then Coriolanus kneeled.

Many people around you gasped in surprise. You looked at Molly and Sejanus in shock, both gasping too, big smiles on their faces.

“Coriolanus…” you whispered his full name, covering your mouth. He smiled.

“Let’s get married” You nodded, pulling him up on his feet to give him a big and long kiss.

The people nearby started cheering, even more than the first time you and him were dancing together weeks ago.

“It’s not as big and shiny as I wanted but… it’s a ring.” He pulled q little ring. He got it at the market and it cost him what he has saved since day one.

Made of copper, with a tiny jade quartz in the middle. Your eyes got glossy and you couldn’t hide a little sob of happiness. He hugged you quickly, confirming you your little best friend who saved you as kids has asked you to marry him.

…

Lucy Gray cried that whole night. She had to swallow her pride and join the applause when he saw Coriolanus asking you to marry him. But she knew there was a long story between you two before she appeared.

So she couldn’t ignore you when you spotted her at the market.

She offered her kindest smile and greeted you. Lucy Gray even congratulated you on the engagement.

And with the pain of her heart, she invited you, Sejanus, and Coriolanus to have a picnic day at the lake The Covey always visited.

Lucy Gray felt awful after seeing your excitement.

And when she saw you coming in a pretty sundress, she had to do everything to calm her jealousy. You looked so happy, holding Coriolanus by the hand and laughing with Sejanus.

“You have the same bag as Lucy Gray!” Maude Ivory said appearing out of nowhere. You looked at your bag and then at the songbird. It was indeed the same bag. You smiled at the girl.

“I see. We must’ve gotten it the same day at the market. It’s so pretty…” The bag was brown, with delicate flowers embroidered and some zipper inside. For the price, it was a great deal.

“It is” Lucy Gray simply said.

“I love your hair, by the way,” Maude Ivory squealed.

“Oh. Thank you. And I like your bracelets…” you replied, smiling at her.

“Really? I make them with stainless steel cable” Coriolanus only exchanged looks with Sejanus, appreciating how well you interacted with the girl.

“Well, they’re amazing. You should try getting some quartz to decorate them…”

“Like your ring!” The girl said pointing at your right hand, making you raise your arm, paying attention to the engagement ring.

“Yeah, like my ring…” you said, looking at Coriolanus with a big smile that he reciprocated.

“Help me lead the way. My feet are free from blisters. Barb Azure got me a new pair of shoes the other day” She dragged you by the hand, leaving Coriolanus and Sejanus behind.

The blonde didn’t ignore the cold look Lucy Gray gave him. But he tried to ignore that.

“I can’t believe you two are getting married. We’re barely over eighteen“ Sejanus said chuckling.

“Me neither. But what’s left?… I don’t see myself with any other girl but then her”

“That makes me very happy. I know you two were made for each other, Coryo”

Coriolanus smiled, nodding. Even when the songbird that had caught his eyes was walking the same trail as you, Coriolanus was ignoring his mistake, his betrayal. Because despite his slips, he merely loved you.

“And what about you and Molly?”

When Coriolanus turned to see his friend, he saw Sejanus blushing, which made the blonde chuckle.

“We’re doing fine. We had a great date last night and…”

“I guess we are no longer kids,” said Coriolanus laughing harder, resulting contagious to Sejanus.

And in over an hour, everyone was at the lake, swimming and having a great time.

As Maude Ivory was sleeping in one of the blankets to rest, Lucy Gray hummed a song, watching the sunset. But soon her eyes drifted to a certain couple.

You were covering your eyes, alert to hear your boyfriend approaching. Once you moved your hands away from your face, you noticed Coriolanus wasn’t around. It was a silly game but it made you anxious.

You two were the only ones left at the lake.

“Coryo?” You asked, wondering how long could he resist underwater.

Maybe it was the military training. Your mind quickly shifted to his new physique. Coriolanus looked manly, a lot. His defined muscles hadn’t gone unnoticed by you. And as much as you missed his curls, you loved how he looked now.

“CORIOLANUS!” You screamed when you felt a pair of big hands around your waist, completely taking you aback. He started laughing, something you missed dearly.

“I hate surprises” you admitted, looking away from him.

“Oh, but you weren’t disgusted when I asked you to marry me?” He cheekily mocked, making you gently push him.

“No silly, I mean when you know a surprise is coming. Like that time it was my birthday and all of you made it so obvious, I couldn’t stop biting my tongue” Your smile makes him unable to resist the urge to kiss you. So he does.

He gently bumps your forehead with his and he recalled saying you were his favorite person as a kid. He still thinks the same.

…

Later that night you are untangling your wet hair. It had been amazing at the lake and you liked everyone from the Covey. You even dissipated your insecurities about Lucy Gray. You were happy to tell all the great news to Tigris and Grandma’am.

“Hey, Do you have the coral lipstick?” Molly asked walking inside the room. She was set to go and have another date with Sejanus.

“Yeah, let's grab it from my bag” When you dug your hand into the bag and couldn’t grab it, you dropped everything on your little vanity.

You grabbed the lipstick but soon a big frown appeared on your face.

There was a notebook that didn’t belong to you. You carefully eye it; no name or anything on the covers. Without any other option you opened and the name wasn’t necessary.

Every page contained lyrics. It belonged to Lucy Gray.

The worst part? The bookmark attached to the page your fingers grabbed it from had a song, written almost a week ago.

Everyone wants to be like a hero —

The cake with the cream, or

The doer, not dreamer.

Doing hard work,

It takes some to change things —

Like goat's milk to butter,

Like ice blocks to water.

This world goes blind

When children are dying.

I turn into dust, but

You never stop trying.

It's why I

Love you —

You're pure as the driven snow.

“Oh my god…” you gasped, rage invading your whole body as you kept reading. Molly looked confused and went to sit beside you.

Cold and clean,

Swirling over my skin,

You cloak me.

You soak right in,

Down to my heart.

“Are you alright, y/n?” Molly asked and you handed her the notebook. Soon she understood.

“Maybe it’s a misunderstanding. I don’t think Coriolanus would do this. He proposed to you, y/n. He loves you”

“Ever since the reaping… I knew he had seen something on that girl” you said bitterly.

“Lucy Gray is a teenage girl still. You are a woman, you grew up with Coriolanus.”

“He’s still a man, Molly”

“A man that loves you and would never hurt you over something so stupid. Put that notebook away. Maybe Lucy Gray reconciled with that Billy Taupe” You nodded, feeling her warm embrace.

“I can totally stay with you”

“Oh god, no. You go out and have fun with Sejanus, dear”

“Are you sure?”

“Yes, maybe I’m overreacting. Go and have fun” she nodded, smiling. And by her choice of outfit, you weren’t sure if Molly was to go and have a romantic night with Sejanus. You had grown suspicious of their escapades, but you hadn’t questioned it.

When Molly left. You finished making your bed and you gave the notebook one last look.

Lucy Gray could have a crush on your fiancé. She could even love him. But Coriolanus Snow would always choose you. That’s why he gave you the ring and not to her.

You placed the notebook in a drawer, hoping to return it as soon as possible.

…

Coriolanus knew you were avoiding him since the day of the lake. And he wasn’t sure why. But you told him you were busy at the clinic. Only accepting phone calls that lasted no longer than eight minutes.

“How’s work at the clinic today?” He asked through the phone.

“Tiring, I’m set to assist a medic at surgery tonight. And I also did the anatomy test to see if I can get a higher rank” you said, cleaning the sweet in your forehead.

“That’s great, sweetheart. Does that mean you’ll be free this Friday?”

“I don’t know…” Coriolanus frowned, grasping the phone anxiously.

“Is everything alright between us, y/n?” You mentally cursed.

Well no, I suspect you had or have an affair with Lucy Gray Baird. Instead, you sigh, forcing a chuckle.

“Yes, dear. It’s just that Sejanus’ Ma said she would send a bride gown for me and I guess I’m growing… nervous about the wedding” Coriolanus smiled, swallowing your lies.

It wasn’t a lie the thing of the bridegroom. But it sure wasn’t the real reason why you had been distant with Coriolanus.

“We can wait. It would be better if we waited until both of us get a higher pay” you nod, eager to change the subject.

“Yeah, so uh- I think I changed my mind about Friday. I’ll see you at the Hob” clutching at the hem of your nurse uniform, you closed your eyes.

“I’ll miss you dearly. Till Friday, sweetheart”

“Don’t forget to send Tigris and Grandma’am the money. Bye, dear” you said before hanging the phone. Soon you sighed, tired and nervous about how things had changed so fast.

“Uh- y/n?” Said one of your workmates knocking on the phone calls room.

“Yes?”

“The headmistress nurse is asking for you at her office…” you frowned.

“Thanks,” you said to the girl before leaving the room.

…

Every trace of insecurity was gone the moment you saw Coriolanus at the Hob. The acid taste of a drink you asked for burned your throat and made you feel excited, gracefully spinning as the crowd stomped and sang happily.

Coriolanus also felt the awkwardness washed away. Seeing you so happy made him almost forget you two had a life back in the Capitol. He realized it didn’t matter where he ended up, all he needed was to be with you.

“You’re in such a great mood,” he said.

“Because you make me happy”

He kissed you, tenderly and dearly holding your hand while doing so.

Both of you separate after hearing the Covey getting on stage, ready to sing. You smile looking at Maude Ivory with a crown of flowers.

“I’m getting another drink,” you said, kissing his cheek before walking away.

“Anything in particular?” The bartender asks.

“Anything with lots of ice, please” he nods and you sigh, brushing some hair away from your sweaty forehead.

When you turn towards the stage, you notice Lucy Gray is starting to sing. Not paying much attention at the beginning you start drinking, feeling the relieving ice melting in your mouth. But quickly, you stop moving, you try to concentrate on the sound, hoping that the crowd will shut up at once.

Like goat's milk to butter,

Like ice blocks to water.

This world goes blind

When children are dying.

I turn into dust, but

You never stop trying.

You leave the drink, taking a few steps forward, eyes glued to Lucy Gray. Your frown starts getting more evident when you see her hopeful smile, her crimson lipstick makes her teeth look even whiter and you know that smile was from love. You don’t want to look around, but you do. Your eyes start searching for Coriolanus. Each step you gave closer felt like a sharp needle poking at your stomach. In his hand, he holds a drink, a glass half empty. On his wrist rests a bracelet.

Your heart stops. It was one of the bracelets Lucy Gray had the day you saw her at the market. The same teal strap around her wrist.

It's why I

Love you —

You're pure as the driven snow.

But what finally broke you was his smile. Coriolanus seemed proud of earning such mention. It seemed like they weren’t even aware they weren’t alone. Like she wasn’t a filthy district scum. Who only had the charm of singing songs. Like Coriolanus didn’t have a fiancé in the same room. Who had already placed all the puzzle pieces in place. Like nothing could ever touch them.

Perhaps your gaze was too strong because Coriolanus felt it. And when he made eye contact with you, that was your cue to bolt. You start pushing people to get out, feeling like the air is suffocating you. Tears violently threatened to spill out.

A couple of steps out of the place, Coriolanus grabs your forearm gently, turning you around in the process.

You slap him as soon as you face him.

Coriolanus looks at you in shock.

“When are you gonna start making intelligent decisions, Coriolanus?” The man couldn’t dare to look around at the shocked people who witnessed everything.

He quickly understood what you meant and with the alcohol in his system, he blushed.

“It didn’t mean anything. It’s over” he almost whispered.

You sighed, letting some tears fall shamelessly.

“Yeah, over like our engagement” You took off the ring, literally throwing it on his face and finally walking away.

With the weight and pain of your heart in your hands, you went straight to your bed, ignoring everything that happened.

…

For two entire days, Coriolanus didn’t know anything from you. He asked Sejanus if he could ask Molly about you. The answer was disappointing as Molly stated that you were taken to District 10 to take a test on surgical procedures.

Coriolanus was made a mess. He avoided Lucy Gray as much as he could and every night he clutched onto the ring. He was aware he had committed many errors but he wasn’t expecting to hurt so much to hear it from you.

But he assumed the guilt. You had done nothing wrong from the moment you met him. Always helping him, keeping his secrets, and being loyal.

She was my sweet girl, he thought.

For some reason, he couldn’t believe what happened. You were very smart, he knew. But the way you solved the mystery in two seconds just by listening to Lucy Gray sing, Coriolanus was shocked.

His need to have you by his side grew the night he killed Mayfield. Seeing Sejanus and Molly being so traumatized by the scene made him realize he had to act. As much as he disapproved of the couple’s rebel intentions, he had to disguise the crime.

Coriolanus missed you so much that he even called you the next day. He asked the secretary of District 10 Hospital if you could speak to him. But the nurse told him that the patient you were treating died and you were taking the day off.

That only made him feel worse.

The disgrace seemed to be following him after Sejanus was taken away and hours later he was hanged along with Molly and that poor man that took the murder weapon.

His head told him to go with Lucy Gray. Because there wasn’t anything left anymore. If someone found the murder weapon with his prints on it, he was dead. He had lost you. And probably it was for the best to disappear into a humble life he wasn’t meant to. The bugs, the weather, the Mockingjay, he hated it.

“What did you tell her?” Lucy Gray asked once they arrived at the cabin.

Coriolanus was about to be honest and say that you hadn’t talked since the day you called off the engagement. He was about to confess that he would never stop loving you. Because it was over.

But he opened the bundle of fabric and there it was the murder weapon.

There was his ticket back to the officer’s academy, back to give power back to the Snow name and back to you. He was free.

So he lied one last time to Lucy Gray.

“I told her that I was sorry. And that it was over for the better” The songbird smiled, quietly understanding what he was thinking. So she also lied to Coriolanus one last time.

…

Nothing could have prepared you for your arrival back in District 12. You left made a mess and came back only to discover Sejanus and Molly were hanged for treason.

You felt sorrow for the loss, but you also felt betrayed. Maybe the late couple didn’t want to hurt you by involving you. But it felt more like they probably weren’t truly close friends. And that ended up hurting you the most.

At that point, you didn’t know what to do with your life. With no friends, no news about Coriolanus, and certainly not expecting anything from him, you had no clue of what was next. Staying in the twelve sounded depressing. Going back to the Capitol meant having to give explanations to everyone and having no job nor education assured.

Sobs took longer than an hour to stop. You found your way to Molly’s side of the room. She had many trinkets and perfumes. Her old desk was untouched. Like she wasn’t even dead. Your fingers trace a paper under a notebook. It was a picture of you and her with Sejanus and Coriolanus having dinner.

Molly looked so happy, Sejanus seemed like he had found a worthy reason to stop defying his wealth. And then there was you and Coriolanus. He was hugging you, his handsome face looking at the camera but surely holding onto you. And your smile looked so naive. Like everything was fine.

Sure it was. Perhaps you were clueless of the truth, but it felt fine.

And before a new wave of tears could come after you. There’s a rushed knock on your door.

Fixing your dress, you give yourself one last look in the mirror, placing the picture back where it was.

“Coming!” You said.

Well, you couldn’t hide the pain of your face but it was the best you could do.

Once you opened the door, shivers ran down your spine.

“Coriolanus?” There he was. Also looks like a mess and carrying his bag. He had the formal peacekeeper uniform and looked even scared.

“Please trust me one last time, y/n” you frown, looking at him in disbelief.

“What did you do?” He sighs.

“I’ll tell you everything. But you need to answer me. Would you trust me?” Unsure, you cross your arms, looking away from him.

“I can’t do this without you…” he admitted, trying to grab your hand.

“Why don’t you ask her to help you?”

“Because it is you who I want, y/n. And I’m sorry for the stupid things I did” You let him grab your hand and his cold touch felt fine. Maybe you felt so alone that you started to ignore all the things he did to you, but the truth was that missed him a lot.

“What do you need me to do?” He smiled and leaned, ready to kiss you but you stopped him.

“Trust isn’t restored that fast, Coriolanus” The man nodded, understanding what you meant. And he was willing to wait. After getting rid of Lucy Gray he vowed to never trust anyone again. But he could make a little spot for you.

“Pack your things,” he said, entering your room.

“What?”

“We’re leaving”

“Coriolanus Snow. Tell me what the hell is going on? I-“

“Just know that for everything I’ve done, you were always at the back of my mind” and that time, Coriolanus didn’t lie.

…

At the districts would lay the darkest secrets of Coriolanus Snow. That he killed his best friend, that he killed an innocent woman who just knew too much. That he got rid of his songbird. And that he cheated on his girlfriend with that same songbird.

As soon as he went back to the Capitol, his luck changed. Both of you started university months ago. The penthouse was renowned. The Plinths turned into family awkwardly. And you would never know many things.

But Coriolanus had gotten his way back to your heart. He had changed a lot. You could tell he would never be the boy you fell in love with again. But you liked how this new man treated you. You liked his words, his promises he always fulfilled and you loved his touch.

With the holidays approaching, you convinced your friends to make a trip to the snowy mountains of the Capitol, where there was an elegant club for the elite and the best restaurants. Sure Lysistrata complained saying maybe everyone should mourn Sejanus a little longer but you insisted it was the best after all that happened during the 10th Hunger Games.

“Why are you up so early, dear?” Asked Coriolanus simultaneously knocking at your door.

When you turned to face him, you couldn’t help but smile. He looked like he had just woken up, his curs weren’t hidden under a slick back hair yet and he looked so boyish.

“I want to be done packing up before finals week” he nodded.

Despite being together again, both agreed it was the best option to keep separate rooms. It made the thrill of being lovers greater and more enjoyable.

“I’ve seen there is a big library where we’re going. We could go and buy some books for our collection” he adds, making you smirk.

It wasn’t a secret he had transformed into a perfect boyfriend. Once Livia Cardew tried to flirt with him at a gala and he politely rejected her, stating he was serious with you.

“I would like that very much” his fingers gently grasped your hips and slowly a smile also appeared on his face.

“Sudden change of subject but… Did you change your hair?” His question made you chuckle, but slowly you nodded.

“I dyed, yes” It was very discreet but once he noticed, he started loving it.

“You look lovely…”

“Thanks, Coryo”

He kissed you. It felt nice, slow, soft. Coriolanus had erased every trace of pain you had accumulated and turned into a solid proof of love.

He didn't know how he was doing it, given that he had turned colder. But not with you. He would never.

As he kissed you, he slipped one hand in his pocket and gently placed the item into your palm. Your eyes shot open and you broke the kiss.

Feeling the cold round object, you slowly opened your hand and there it was. A golden ring with a big rectangle diamond that shined beautifully. The band had tiny details carved. It was antique but elegant, sophisticated, and perfect.

“I won’t ruin it this time. Never again…” he whispered in your lips.

“Coryo… Where did you get this? Did Strabo-“

“No. It was my mother’s…” your features softened.

“Grandma’am kept it all these years. The only thing she saved from us selling or trading” he added, which only made you feel tender.

“So… Would you marry me?” He got on his knees and you were already nodding.

“Yes… I think we’re ready now”

You were always going to be his karma. His reason to feel guilty. But he preferred keeping you by his side forever rather than letting you go. And the worst part was that he actually loved you.

_______________________________

#coriolanus snow x reader #tom blyth x reader #coriolanus x reader #young coriolanus snow #corio snow #coriolanus x lucy gray #coriolanus fanfiction #coriolanus snow

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writersblockiskillingme · 1 year ago

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delete this if you find it weird or confusing 🙏

But headcanons of what snow (old) would act like if he saw the granddaughter of his first love that he betrayed or something , like she looks exactly like her and she’s been chosen for the games

Reminder of His First Love | Coriolanus Snow Headcanons

Warning/s: Old!Snow, mentions of death, possible grammar and spelling mistakes

Author's note: OMG THIS IS AMAZINGG!! I really tried and I truly hope that I did this justice it deserves and I'm sorry if this is not what you had on mind. Enjoy!

So you're a granddaughter of one and only songbird, Lucy Gray Baird.

After she escaped form Snows clutches, she made it look like she was dead just so he could leave her alone forever.

Her heart broke from his betrayal.

She moved to the furthest part of the District 12 once she returned back home.

She tried to live her life to the fullest after everything that happened.

Later on she married a nice man from her District and they had a son.

She sadly passed away not long after.

However, her spirit lived on and passed itself upon her dear granddaughter who she sadly never met.

She would've been proud if she knew you.

Your father always told you that you were your grandmother's clone.

And boy was that true.

Your face, your hair, your voice, the way you carried yourself... everything was just like Lucy Gray.

Your mom always used to joke that she was reincarnated in came back as you.

And just like your grandmother, you got picked for the Hunger Games as a female tribute from District 12.

President Snow was sipping on his tea as he watched the reaping ceremony and he could swear that his heart stopped beating for a moment once he saw you in a colorful dress as you stepped up.

He tried to not think of Lucy Gray Baird for a long time, now imagine his shock when she stepped onto that stage once again.

Once the interviews came and you were interviewed by Caesar Flickerman a usual question came up.

"What is your talent?"

You stopped to think for a moment and answered without hesitation.

"I can sing." You smiled at him and then looked at the crowd. "I know that it may not help me much in the arena, but I'm really good at it."

Snow thought that you proved that, alright.

You formed alias whith Foxface in the arena.

As she died you held her in your arms as you sang her to sleep.

"No, nothing you can take was ever worth keeping..."

Snow was frozen in his seat.

During the games, he found it hard to watch them somehow.

It was perfectly clear that Lucy Gray came back to haunt him and destroy him.

And boy did she do exactly that.

He never would have thought that Lucy Gray's daughter would become the leader of the rebellion.

He should've explained it, though.

The rebells won and you were supposed to be the one to execute Snow.

The words that you told him once you met up with him before his execution echoed in his mind until the moment he died.

"I am absolutely repulsed by you."

With that, Lucy Gray's clone left him speechless.

He couldn't believe that after all those years she still affected him.

But you now what they say, you never forget your firsts.

Pretty soon he was tied up against the pole as you stood a few feet away from him.

"You're as pure as the driven snow." You mocked him before you let the arrow fly, ripping through the air.

It seems like Lucy Gray's mockingjays did harm him after all.

TAGLIST:

@hellonheels-x @especiallythewomenandthechildren @prettyinsatiable @caroline-books @runningfrom2am @10ava01 @thecrowdedstreetin1944

#headcanon #headcanons #coriolanus snow #coriolanus snow x reader #the hunger games #thg #thg movies #ballad of songbirds and snakes #the ballad of songbirds and snakes #anon ask #coriolanus x reader

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dontforgetukraine · 1 month ago

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Nestor Bilous was born in 1889 in the village of Lebiazhe, Kharkiv region. He completed three grades of the church-parish school and participated in World War I. He began keeping a diary in 1911, but his most detailed entries describe the beginning of the Civil War, the mass man-made famine of 1921-1923, and the Holodomor of 1932-1933. Bilous essentially became a chronicler of the Soviet government’s destruction of Ukrainian villages. In 1937, Nestor Bilous,who was then the manager of the collective farm “Chervonyi Kolos,” was arrested by the NKVD for “discontent with party policies.” During the search, the NKVD confiscated a notebook with his notes, that became the main evidence of his “counter-revolutionary activities.” Bilous spent six years in forced labour camps and only returned home a year after Stalin’s death. Here are just a few entries from his diary: —Holodomor Museum

---

April 30, 1933 It rains often, and it’s cold. Sowing is progressing very poorly because there is no grain, no horses, and even if someone has a horse, it’s too weak to work a full day in the field. So, this year there will be even less sown. People are constantly dying, and they bury six in one grave because there’s no one to dig individual graves. On April 27, Mykola Fedorovych Butenko died, a young man, 22 years old, a real guard, tall and handsome. He had to die of starvation just because the village council didn’t give him a certificate, as the son of a dekulakized father. Without it, no one would hire him. And in the spring, when he was already too weak, there was work, but he couldn’t do it, and he died of starvation.

---

May 13, 1933 The warm weather started on May 8, and all the crops are sprouting. Beetroot and seedlings are being eaten by beetles and fleas. We need rain, but there isn't any. The collective farms keep sowing; they will probably be sowing until St. Peter's Day. People are still dying of hunger. On May 12,Paraska Chorna,an activist and party candidate,died of famine. When people were being sold out for not meeting the grain requisition quotas, she danced in the school out of joy in the evening,and now she has died of hunger, like a dog.

---

May 20, 1933 Every day, people die of famine. The village council has appointed a sanitary commission to collect the bodies and bury them because there is no one to do the burials. Now, the village council drives people out to dig a large grave for about ten people, and then they bury them. Many adults and children, and when you look at them, they are living corpses.

---

Since the beginning of the invasion of 2022, Bilous' native village Lebiazhe was in the grey zone for a long time, suffering from Russian shelling. The crimes continue... —Holodomor Museum

#Ukraine #Holodomor #Ukrainian history #Nestor Bilous #Kharkiv #Lebiazhe #collective farms #death #Mass Graves

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desos-records · 7 months ago

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Fascinated and devastated by EPIC: The Musical flipping the moral script of Odysseus' arc, yet coming to the same conclusions.

There's Classic Odysseus, who accepts that his fate and the fate of his men are out of his control. Classic Odysseus, who knowingly sacrificed six men to Scylla and accepted the cost without second thought. Classic Odysseus, who mourns his men then blames them for their own deaths because of disobedience or cowardice or hunger, comparing them to the goats herded on Ithaca.

And there's EPIC Odysseus, who from the start chafes against the will of the gods in favor of his compassion. EPIC Odysseus, who does not accept that his fate and the fate of his men are out of his control and suffers because of it. EPIC Odysseus, who is clever as ever, yet reckless with his heart.

But they are not so different as that. Troy did make Odysseus kinder. Patroclus demonstrated to them all how compassion is more honorable than any act of glory when he lied and took up arms and fought without thought to his own prestige, but only so that the slaughter of his friends would end. Odysseus saw the horrors committed after Troy's walls fell. He--the liar, the schemer, the man of many turns--understood the dishonor more than anyone and refused to repeat it for the sake of others.

They both come to understand that the wicked, vicious, ruthless aspect of their nature is acceptable when used in defense of their own. They slaughter their enemies with honor, but they will slaughter their enemies. They draw the line in the sand. Every man will be given the chance to prove their honor--hospitality and strangers, it always returns to hospitality and strangers, Zeus is the god of both and demands their sanctity--and every man who crosses that line will prove himself an enemy. And enemies will be slaughtered and sacrificed like cattle.

Ruthlessness is mercy--mercy for Penelope and Telemachus and Laertes who have suffered by his absence, who survived twenty years unprotected and three years under siege only by Penelope's cleverness. Not even to mention Ithaca and its people left without a king. Who else could have saved them? With Laertes too old and Telemachus too young and Penelope confined to only her loom and her tongue as weapons.

Were they worth the deaths of 600 soldiers? 108 young men? 12 enslaved women?

Athena, and through her the epic itself, declares that they are worth the bloodshed, for they are on the right side of the line.

#don't mind me just breaking down a little #epic the musical #epic the underworld saga #odysseus #the odyssey #greek mythology

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thetrashqueeeen · 2 years ago

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the hunger games is having a resurgence and i’m back on my bullshit so i thought i would post what i always imagined the rest of effie’s life looked like

she stays in the capitol to begin with. katniss was shocked when she saw them kiss, but was hastily shut up by haymitch when she teased him and they never really spoke about effie much after that. effie called haymitch once a week, filling him in on the rebuilding efforts, her rapidly blooming social life, new fashion trends, inter-district moving and the latest in geese rearing tips(i’m a goose apologist here he keeps geese ok). he can tell something is off but he doesn’t realise how much of it is outright lies

effie wakes in the mornings screaming, the pain of whatever torture she was reliving rapidly dissolving as her bedroom sharpened into focus. She rarely leaves her apartment. she watches them rebuild from her window, her heart racing when unexpected bangs and crashes come from construction sites. she gets up later and later each day, sometimes not bothering to get out of bed at all. when she can’t face the nightmares, she goes to the roof of her building and screams off the edge until her voice is hoarse. she tells haymitch that she’s been out partying when she calls. her neighbourhood gets a reputation for being haunted, people say you can still hear the rebels screaming at night. her old friends are mostly dead and the ones that aren’t can’t face the memory of her as much as she can’t face the memory of them. they do try for a while, pretending that everything is fine for as long as they can ignore the frenzied fear right under the surface. the cocoon her life has become feels suffocating but ultimately comforting. she tells herself she’s fine, that this is fine. she doesn’t know why she lies to him when she calls.

she lasts a year. one afternoon, she’s on the phone with haymitch and he’s telling her about katniss and peeta. they’ve just gotten engaged for real and he’s chattering on about them in the way he does when he lets his guard down. his voice is so comforting and so nice and so homely that her heart clenches and her hand grips the phone so tightly the plastic nearly buckles in her grip. she closes her eyes so the only thing entering her brain is his voice. when they get off the phone she throws her favourite things into a suitcase, showers and gets dressed in actual clothes for the first time all week and walks to the train station before she can think about it too hard. the days she spends on the train pass quickly and she steps onto the platform at 12 in the middle of a deluge. she trudges over to victors village, her suitcase clattering over muddy paving stones. she steps into the square of victors village in the pouring rain, looking sullen, tired and thinner than when anyone last saw her. she’s filled with sudden unease, and stands still, not sure she has the nerve to go and bash on his door. she feels much too old for this, much to old to run away from her life without telling anyone, for a man who didn’t even invite her. she’s freezing. peeta notices her and goes to invite her in, but katniss stops him, seeing haymitch has set out to meet her in the square. as he gets closer he notices she looks like shit. she’s not dressed for the rain and her clothes cling to her depressingly, her hair is plastered to her face and she looks about as tired as he feels. she’s stood with her arms crossed tightly, looking like she might cry. he wraps his arms around her cold, sodden frame and it takes her a second, but she wriggles her arms out from between them and wraps her arms around his neck, stepping closer. they might be too old for this, but she can’t deny this is better than whatever she was doing before. he doesn’t kiss her there; it still feels too alien to not hide.

the next morning, effie pulls one of haymitch’s porch chairs to the edge of the veranda and basks in the rising sun, allowing it to warm her all the way through. he comes out with coffee an hour or so later, remembering she missed it in 13. peeta comes over to say hello and effie finally feels her heart slow down.

she gets used to the rhythms of 12. she did worry that too much time had passed for them, but they fall back together as they’re meant to. they bicker and debate through barely suppressed smiles and finally offer the overt support the other has always needed. when haymitch gets up to feed the geese at first light, he leaves her in bed alone and she rolls into the warm spot he leaves. he makes her coffee when he’s done and says it’s because he’d never hear the end of it if he didn’t. in reality he just can’t imagine not getting to see her lift her bleary head off the pillow, her blonde hair mused and her eyes flickering open. her hair is one of the things he loves the most. he teases her about her ‘lotions and potions’ but he spends hours running his hands through her hay-coloured waves. she lets it grow down to her shoulders for the first time since her baby hair was chopped off for wigs. she starts growing produce in the back garden. the first time katniss sees her, hair tied back with a patterned scarf, wearing dungarees and chunky boots, she laughs out loud so hard that effie’s in a huff with her for a whole week. she offers an apology only because her wedding simply will not happen without effie planning it.

one day, she gets up as soon as she hears haymitch go out the back door in the morning. she dresses in a baggy t-shirt and bright dungarees (she tries her best not to link the bright dungarees that being her so much joy to grey jumpsuits) and makes coffee for them both. he startles when he finds her at the kitchen table, but she just asks him if he knew she had a degree from capitol university. he didn’t. she tells him she wants to teach children in the school house and expects him to laugh. he does a little bit, but then tells he she’ll be fantastic and admired her as she marched out the door to go and talk to the head teacher. they start her out easy, but the children adore her funny accent, soft hair and bright clothes. she adores them all right back. effie has a gaggle of small children running around her for all of the wedding and katniss looks over her the entire day, smiling at her and haymitch playing with them all. peeta had been slowly beginning to raise the idea of a family, but katniss had been shutting it down forcibly every time. she walks over to peeta at the reception and draws his attention to the large game of tag effie was participating in. as haymitch starts hefting kids over his shoulder shouting ‘the monster’s coming’ katniss tells him she wants their first daughter to be called primrose, not prim- never prim, but primrose. they’ll be great surrogate grandparents, she tells him.

effie adores little Finnick from the moment he’s born. haymitch also adores the baby, but is much less willing to show it. katniss pretends to not notice he still shakes sometimes and he pretends he doesn’t only hold him when he’s sat down. a few years later, finnick is joined by primrose who is just as beautiful as her namesake. as soon as finnick is old enough to go to school, effie insists on teaching his class every year. once primrose is old enough she trades off each year, trying (and failing) to pretend they’re not her favourite. finnick trains as a carpenter and every time effie so much as mentions something that needs fixing in the house finnick is there with a toolbox and his father’s smile. primrose grows up in awe of her big brother, the boy who calls her pipsqueak, shared every glass of orange juice he’s ever drunk with her and copies her maths homework every days she can remember. when he starts his own business, she starts to keep his accounts. it’s the summer she turns 15. she carries on absorbing knowledge like a sponge, retaining every fact, theorem and topic effie gifts her with. effie is the first person she tells when she applies for a scholarship at capitol university. her mother is the first person she tells when she gets it. katniss cries soft, bittersweet tears when primrose tells her she’s going to study medicine at the big university in the capitol. effie hugs her so hard on the platform as she gets the train that she thinks she might snap. katniss is so happy that her children are no longer the children of the last victors. they are the carpenter and the doctor. they have never once chopped their dreams off at the knees just in case they get reaped. katniss and peeta cry at her loss, sure she will only return to visit. finnick and effie do not cry, they know she’s coming back. she comes back with a woman in tow, but she comes back none the less. effie plans her marriage to the woman they come to know as Evie. finnick gets married just a year after they do, and he and his wife have so many children, haymitch jokes they should start a football team.

effie and haymitch don’t get anywhere near as long as they deserve, but they do get 25 good years. haymitch is older than she is, and his body has been through a lot. when she pleads with him to go to the capitol for treatment, he begs her to understand why he can never go back there, and she finds she does. he passes in his own bed, with his wife laying next to him, stroking his hair with quiet reverence. the last thing he hears is her whispering quietly that she loves him more than anything. that she would go through all of it again for just one more day.

when haymitch is gone, effie retires from the school house and spends as much time as she can with katniss, peeta, finnick, primrose and their various broods. she fully expects to die of a broken heart, she considers it only right. she thinks often of the tired, scared woman who stood in the rain waiting for him. she does not die of a broken heart, much to her annoyance. she doesn’t even grow much weaker with age. she keeps the geese until the last one dies and never stops growing food in her garden. one hot day in summer, the whole family go down to the meadow to bask in the heat and watch the children play. ‘this is the life a victor deserves’ she tells katniss as they watch finnick and primrose play with the children. she lays down in the sun to have a nap, resting her head on katniss’s lap. she hears the children screech with laughter, she feels the warm sun on her skin and she passes quickly, her last breathe quiet and unnoticed. haymitch is waiting for her when she gets there.

#the hunger games #hayffie #everlark #they got a victors life in the end #haymitch x effie #effie trinket #haymitch abernathy #katniss everdeen #peeta mellark

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daydreaming-nerd · 8 months ago

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Young Love and Old Money (Cassian x Female! Reader) Part 9

Young Love and Old Money Masterlist

AN: Okay remember when I said there would be a lot more angst? Well here we are. We have arrived at angst station, everybody off the train. This part is so dramatic I really laid it on thick here. Regardless I hope you enjoy and I will try to get part 10 up ASAP!!!

Summary: She was the most beautiful woman in Prythian, sister to the High Lord of Night, and now she is the soon-to-be wife of Eris Vanserra. Despite her many titles and her aura of unattainability, Cassian can't help but fall deeply in love with the princess of the Night Court. But will it be enough to stop her impending wedding to a man who is sure to destroy her from the inside out?

Warnings: Sexism, super heavy angst, this got really dark, violence, blood, implied rape (but not described), did I mention violence?, (I'm sorry you guys.)

Word Count: 6,333

The next morning I wake up in my own bed and I don’t move for hours.

Thankfully, after about an hour of crying by the Sidra, Azriel found me and took me back to the House of Wind. Apparently Cassian had sent him, which gave me a little bit of hope. That is until I went to his door and found his room empty. According to Azriel he left for Windhaven after returning home to pack a bag. I didn’t need to interrogate further to know that Cassian wouldn’t be back before the wedding.

I spent the entire day before the wedding in bed, staring at the sliver of light on the floor that the curtains let into the darkened room. Everytime I close my eyes I could hear Cassian and I’s laughter, which made me unable to fall asleep. When I wasn’t reminiscing over memories of Cassian I was listening intently to the sounds of the house, hoping I would hear his heavy boots thudding back to his room. I just wanted to see him one last time.

However, those footsteps never came, and I found myself staring at the wall until my body gave up on me, from either exhaustion or hunger and I fell asleep.

Cassian’s pov:

The second I landed in Windhaven I cracked open a bottle of whiskey and downed a glass praying it would allow me to sleep. Of course I was wrong.

The entire night I saw images of y/n holding that little girl in her arms. God I had practically melted right then and there, thinking about what she would look like holding our own children. How adorable they would be with their tiny wings.

My sleepless night had carried over with me the next day, everything and everyone putting me on edge. A young Illyrian had dropped their sword while sparring and I blew up at him. Devlon tried to argue that the females shouldn’t be training and I nearly slammed his head into a wall.

I was aggressively sharpening my swords on the edge of the sparring ring when Azriel found me, my brother simply nodded his head towards the center as if to say “blow off some steam big fella.” I couldn’t turn him down, as he was the only one who could give me a run for my money, and today he sure did.

“You fight like shit and you look like shit too brother,” Azriel barked after beating me again. He tossed his sword to the ground seemingly calling it quits for the day.

“Yeah well my mate is about to marry another male in the next 12 hours so how did you expect to find me?” I gripe at him taking my seat on a weathered rock.

“I suppose I wouldn’t know what to do in your situation either,” he admitted, taking a seat next to me.

“Seems about right for me. Grew up a bastard and lived in the mud till you and Rhys’ sorry asses came along. Lost my mother and never even got to bury her, fought for 500 years, and then became mated to the princess, who is marrying another male.” I scoff, shaking my head at the ridiculousness. “I’ll give the mother one thing, at least she’s consistent.”

Azriel was quiet for a moment, as if taking in what I had said before clapping a hand on my back, “The pain, it will go away Cass. It will take time, but I will be there with you every step of the way.” he assured me, and for a moment I felt a little lighter.

“Get wasted with me tomorrow?” I ask more seriously than I should.

“You know I will,” he said, offering me a slight smile.

I hoped that Rhys had gotten some more whiskey since the last time I raided his cabinet, because I don’t think any amount of drink could make me forget the way she looked at me the first morning we woke up together. The way she would laugh when I kissed her cheeks, the feeling of her delicate hands running soap over my wings. How she would say “you need a bath!” when I would give her a sweaty hug after training. The face she made when I distracted her from one of her romance novels by tickling her feet that rested in my lap.

By the cauldron, I was a dead man.

y/n's pov:

Stepping into the Autumn Court felt like I was walking to my own execution. Instead of Eris being at the end of that aisle there would be a guillotine. I almost wished for that instead. Any comment made by Rhys about how I seemed tired I chalked up to pre-wedding nerves and thankfully he didn’t push after that.

The entire morning had been spent poking and prodding at my skin, my hair and my eyes. If I thought that Nuala and Cerridwen were meticulous I was sorely mistaken. The ladies of the Autumn Court didn’t mess around and if this was my life going forward (which sadly it was), cauldron boil me.

The ladies in wait primped me up until a half an hour before I walked down the aisle. I had to literally commande them out of my suite in order to have a moment alone. I sat staring at myself in the floor length mirror. For what it was worth, I looked beautiful. I half expected the dress that was chosen for me to be awful and gaudy, however it was elegant. The lace along the neckline mimicking the flames associated with Eris’ power. Had I been walking down the aisle to a different groom, I might venture to say that I was excited to be married. However as I stared at myself in my white wedding dress I couldn’t help but feel a tear slide down my face.

A tentative knock reverberated through the room, nearly making me jump out of my skin. I took a deep breath and wiped away a stray tear.

“Come in,” I said with shaky words looking at the double oak doors through the mirror before me.

The door opened slowly, whoever it was looking around the room before entering. A large figure finally popped it’s head in, eyes finding me immediately. I would know that jet black hair anywhere.

Cassian.

I whirled around to meet his gaze as he shut the door, taking slow and tentative steps towards me. His eyes searched my face for any hint of anger or resentment.

“Cass,” I breathed, as if to assure myself he was really there.

“You look beautiful,” he smiled looking me up and down, but I could see the veiled sadness on his face. He was putting on a front, and a bad one at that.

“Thank you,” I say, taking a tentative step towards him. “How did you get in here?”

“They don’t have you that well guarded,” he chuckled, stepping closer till he stood before me. Neither of us reached for one another, unsure of where we both stood. It felt wrong not to instantly wrap my arms around him. “I don’t like where we left things,” he continued.

“Neither do I,”

“I wanted to say that I’m sorry. I’m sorry that I yelled at you that night. I’m sorry about the things I said,” he starts again. His hands reach for mine but pull back as if afraid to touch me. “I wanted to say that I understand now. And that I think you are incredibly brave to be doing this for Velaris. I’ll never be happy that you’re marrying Eris, and I’ll always wish it was me. But I understand now, and I respect the love you have for your people, and the lengths you’re willing to go to to keep them safe. Will you forgive me?”

I feel the stray tear pricking my eye once more, “There was never anything to forgive Cass. I was more upset with myself for giving you false hope. For going along and loving you and acting like things were going to be alright when I couldn’t guarantee it.” I sigh, casting my head down, unable to face him.

I feel his gentle calloused hand tip my chin up to meet his gaze. His eyes, that beautiful hazel, glassed over. Despite it all, despite what I put him through, there is still so much love in them, and I know I’ll never really deserve it.

“Loving you was the greatest gift I’ve ever known, and ever will know,” he smiles as if he’s remembering the short time we did have together. “I’ll be here waiting if you should ever change your mind or in case something ever happens.”

“Cass,” I start to protest but he stops me.

“I’ve loved you for so many years y/n. There can be no one else but you. If I don’t get to have you until we are both old and gray so be it. I’ve waited this long,” he assures me cupping my cheek.

I don’t even have words to reply to his confession. Boundaries be damned. I threw myself around him pulling him as close as possible. His arms tighten around me like he had been waiting for me to make a move. In the embrace there’s an understanding, an unsaid agreement.

I back away to see those hazel eyes once more, my own eyes raking over his body. I notice he’s not dressed in a fine suit jacket, or even his fighting leathers. Instead, he’s donning a loose fitted shirt, something completely unfit for a royal wedding.

“You’re not staying are you?” I ask, pressing a hand to his stubbled cheek that tells me he didn’t shave this morning.

“No, I just had to see you one last time,” he answers, taking my hand from his cheek so he could hold both of them.

The weight of his words shoot right through me, and as I look at him, I let them sink in. I watched as a tear slid down his own cheek, it was the only time I had ever seen the general cry.

“One last time,” I repeated, letting the words consume me.

His eyes glanced down at my lips, a silent plea to taste them again,

“Can I?” he whispered.

“Gods yes,” I sigh.

A hand drifted up cupping my cheek and pulling me into a kiss. The last kiss we might ever share. I poured every ounce of love into it trying to give him something to remember me by, trying to savor every moment of it for when my days ahead were darkest. My chest heaved as if being pulled forward and then…

Snap.

It was as if a piece of me was returned, one I never knew I lost. I pulled back to meet his gaze and by the way he looked at me I could tell he knew, had known. I felt like I was truly seeing him for the first time as that shimmering golden bond glowed between us.

“You’re my-” I started but I jumped at the bang sounding throughout the room.

My eyes met the fiery auburn of Eris’ as he entered the room, at least twenty autumn court soldiers behind him. I didn’t have time to step away as he winnowed to me pulling me away from Cassian.

“You!” he seethed at my general who was already assessing the situation. “I had my suspicions but never the proof and you fell into my trap so easily.” he boasted.

My thoughts scrambled to what Cassian had said earlier…”They don’t have you that well guarded.”

“Restrain the bastard!” Eris ordered his grip on my arm tightening at the command.

“No!” I screamed lurching for Cassian but Eris hauled me back to him.

The soldiers were on him in an instant all of them falling like dominos before The Lord of Bloodshed. Cassian’s eyes blazed with a fury by the likes of which I had never seen before, he wasn’t a general protecting his princess. He was a male protecting his mate.

Eris’ body tensed behind mine as soldier after soldier fell. In an act of desperation I felt him unsheathe the dagger at his thigh, pressing the blade to my throat.

“Oh general,” Eris sang.

It was enough to catch Cassian’s attention for a split second, his eyes widening as he saw the position I was in. A rogue soldier used the small window of time to pull his dagger and stab it through Cassian’s side.

“NO!” I screamed as Cassian hissed, his knees hitting the floor. Immediately the rest of the soldiers were on him, restraining him and binding his wings. His siphons tried to come to light but sputtered out.

“Bloodbane,” Eris smiles, lowering the dagger from my throat. “Stings like a bitch doesn’t it?”

“Eris please, don’t do this. He’s my mate, I didn’t know until now and-”

“I would choose your next words very carefully, pet,” he cuts me off. “Right now your ‘mate’ has been stabbed with a dagger laced in bloodbane, which means that even if your dear brother did know he was here he couldn't communicate with him. As for Rhysand, he now sits in a wedding chapel completely unaware and unarmed with a bloodbane arrow aimed for his fucking throat. And last time I checked the only asset you had was a magic cunt.”

Cassain growled from the other side of the room at Eris’ vulgar words. My eyes flitted to where he was pulling against the restraints.

“However, I consider myself a merciful ruler,” Eris taunted, grabbing my face to meet his stare. “I’ll give you a choice. You either walk down that aisle, be a good little wife, and pop out a couple of heirs as promised, or you call off the wedding and I’ll gut your precious general where he kneels.”

“y/n, no!” Cassian gritted through bared teeth.

I watched my mate struggle to break free, the bloodbane in his system beginning to take over. I looked to Eris who stared at me with hungry eyes. I tried to think of some way out of this, but Eris was right. We had fallen right into this trap, and my hands were tied.

My gaze met Cassian who could read my face like a book, “I’m sorry Cassian, but I once told you that I could never live with myself if something happened to you and I had the power to stop it.” I turn to face Eris and his shit eating grin. “If you promise not to hurt him, or my brother, I will go with you.”

“You will submit to me fully?” Eris asks, raising an eyebrow.

“Yes,” I nod, my mind flashing back to when Rhys was in the same position.

Eris steps closer to me, tilting my head up in an act of dominance, his mouth too close to mine for comfort. I could hear Cassian’s grunts as he continued to try and break free.

“And you’ll warm my cock whenever I please?” he muses, clearly loving the control he has over me.

“Yes,” I grit.

He smiled triumphantly, releasing my chin as he turned to his guards, “Take him away and lock him in the dungeons.”

“You said-”

“When you walk down that aisle and say ‘I do’ then I shall send him back to the Night Court, Jewel of Prythian. I won’t be taking any chances.” Eris growls in my face before turning to Cassian who had now been brought to his feet. “If I ever see you in my court, or anywhere near my wife again Prince of Bastards, I will make sure that she pays the price.”

“You fucking bastard!” Cassian roars, body nearly limp from the bloodbane as he’s hauled off by the guards.

“Wait, let me say goodbye!” I cry running to him, but I’m yanked back by my arm so roughly it nearly pops out of its socket.

“Your obedience begins now!” Eris grits but I pay him no mind thrashing about in his grasp trying to touch my mate once last time as he disappears behind the oak doors.

“Cassian!” I scream for him, tears waterfalling over my eyes.

“y/n!” he shouts back.

But it’s too late. The doors close with a definite slam and I’m left weeping in Eris’ grasp as I hear the sounds of Cassian struggling down the hall.

Cassian’s pov:

Eris was right, the bloodbane hurt like a bitch. Even an hour later as I sat on the cold, wet floor of the Autumn Court cell, the toxin still made me feel lethargic. As if I had taken the world's strongest sleeping tonic.

The worst part of it all was that I could hear everything. The organ playing signaling that y/n was walking down the aisle and the cheers of the people as they finally said their vows. The worst and loudest of them all were the bells.

They rang with such clarity, and joy. The happy little melody could be heard from everyone in the Autumn Court, announcing that the Eris and y/n were finally wed. The ringing made me double over with grief, their sound a reminder that I was the only male in Prythian who could not protect his mate. A shame greater than being a bastard, and one I would carry with me until the end of my days.

Metal on metal screeched from somewhere in the dungeon as a light poured in. The jingling of keys and stomping of boots stopped at the door to my cell and I didn’t even bother to look up. Nothing mattered anymore anyways.

“Come on ‘Prince of Bastards’, time for you to go back to your own court,” the guard grumbled, like hauling me home was a huge inconvenience to him.

I rose to my feet and stepped languidly out of the door. The restraints on my wrists and wings were removed, the skin on my wrists rubbed raw from the blue stone shackles. I was led up the stairs to where the wards ended and was immediately winnowed to the border of the Autumn and Winter Court. The cold blizzards of winter whipping around us and chilling my wings.

“Prince Eris has asked me to remind you that you are now banished from this court. He also says that should you choose to seek out his wife once more you know what the consequences will be.” the guard relayed.

Before I could even think about punching the asshole square in his jaw he disappeared into thin air, no doubt going back to his post in the basement of the palace.

I was left with nothing but the sound of my own thoughts, and the feelings of my own guilt as I flew home towards the House of Wind where I knew Azriel was waiting. The flight was the longest one I had ever been on, as normally I took this route with y/n in my arms.

I had never been so happy to touch down on solid ground once more. Azriel tentatively walked out onto the balcony, two glasses of whiskey in hand. His shadows told him that something was very wrong.

“What the hell happened?” He asked, an alarm ringing in his voice.

The lump in my throat returns as I remember how it all went down. “The bond snapped for her, and she changed her mind. Eris found us, said he had set the whole thing up. I was stabbed with a bloodbane dagger,” I say, lifting my arm to assess the blood leaking from my side. “He told her that if she didn’t marry him he would gut me and Rhys.”

The next words teeter on my lips as I feel my eyes brimming with tears. It felt like pieces of me were being ripped out as I finally confessed to my failure.

“I couldn’t save her,” I choked out, voice cracking halfway through.

The words being uttered into the world was enough to have my knees crashing to the ground. The impact radiating through my body to the open wound on my side that still hadn’t healed. I was sure that Azriel had said something as I heard the glasses of whiskey clatter to the ground. But the roaring in my ears was so loud, so unbearable, that the only thing that assured me he was still there was the arm he slung around my back as he knelt next to me.

y/n’s pov:

The wedding was uneventful and to be honest the only part of it I remembered was when the priestess said, “If there is anyone present who can show just cause why these two may not be joined in matrimony, speak now or forever hold your peace.”

The silence that had fallen upon the crowd was so deafening I nearly shuddered. I was stupid to hope that he would come charging in like some fairytale I had read as a child. The smug look on Eris' face as the priestess continued with the nuptials made my blood go cold.

The reception was even worse. I had spent the entire time sipping wine with a bland expression on my face. It seemed as though Eris’ new favorite word was ‘wife’ considering he found a way to use it in every sentence. While most would think it a term of endearment I knew it was just to show his ownership.

“Prince Eris, congratulations on stealing ‘The Jewel’ from us all,” a voice said, cutting across the sea of chatter. I looked up from my lap to find the High Lord of Spring, standing before our table.

“Thank you Tamlin, she is quite the prize,” Eris crooned, placing a kiss to the back of my hand.

“That she is,” Tamlin nodded, his eyes raking me from head to toe. “Almost makes me regret crossing her brother, I would’ve liked to have been in the race for her hand.”

“All in the past now,” Eris smiles, kissing the palm of my hand. “Right wife?”

“Right,” I nod to him before turning to Tamlin. “High Lord, where is the Cursebreaker tonight? I would’ve liked to make my acquaintance.” I ask secretly hoping that my brother might catch a glimpse of his mate tonight.

“Feyre is,” he averts his gaze from mine as if trying to decide what to say. “She is safe at home. Busily planning for the wedding.”

“The wedding?” I inquired further, wondering if Rhys knew.

“Yes we are to be wed soon,” Tamlin beamed with pride. “I’m sure we will see you both present?”

“Of course Tamlin, of course,” Eris assured the High Lord of Spring.

Surely if Feyre was getting married to Tamlin my brother knew. I hoped I would get the chance to tell him. The last thing our court, well I suppose his court now, needed was another separation of mates.

The rest of the night passed on quite slowly. At one point I was able to feel the bond between Cassian and I. It was faint, but it was there, and I almost swore that I felt him tug on it at one point. It wasn’t until people started making their excuses to go home that Eris finally said the words I had been dreading.

“Shall we go to bed, wife?” he mused his lips brushing the shell of my ear.

“After I say goodbye to my brother,” I nod standing up to find Rhys, wherever he was.

“You’ll see your brother soon enough, my pet. For now let us retire to our chambers,” he growled, grasping my arm and winnowing away to what I assumed was his room.

He watched intently from behind me as I took in my surroundings.

The bed was large, draped in furs and crisp white sheets. Wood paneling surrounded the four walls, giving the place an ornate look. The fireplace was a glow, casting a warm light upon the room. If it had been anyone else’s room it would’ve been cozy, maybe even romantic.

The air filled with tension as I waited for Eris to do something, or say something, as I refused to turn and meet his gaze. The only sound heard was the crackling of the fire.

“I’ve waited for this moment for quite a long time,” Eris mused from where I knew he was leaning against the door.

“You’ve made that abundantly clear throughout our courtship,” I say straight, unable to meet his predatory stare.

“How should I have acted when you are so tempting? So innocent, so pure, and now so completely mine,” he purred and I could hear his feet shuffle as he pushed off the wall. “And now that you’ve promised me your submission? Well,” he chuckled. “I’m going to have a great deal of fun with you.”

The hairs on the back of my neck stood up. I knew what was coming and I knew he wouldn’t be gentle and loving like Cassian. I knew that once again my hands were tied.

“Tell me you belong to me,” Eris uttered, taking a step closer to where I stood rigid.

I sucked down the lump in my throat, “I belong to you,” I whispered.

“Tell me you want me to touch you,” he went on, taking another step forward, his presence looming.

“I-I want you to touch me,” I repeated back, a tear slipping down my cheek.

Eris hummed in approval behind me. He took one, two more steps until I felt his warmth at my back. Finger tips danced up and down the backs of my arms causing my breath to lurch in fear. His breath was hot on my neck as his presence sucked out every bit of air from the room.

“Tell me you love me,” he purred.

My heart stopped cold. There were many things I would have to do or say to please Eris in the millennium that I would be tied to him. But these three words? He would never hear them from my lips. Maybe towards our children, but never to him.

“You know it wouldn't be true,” I whisper, feeling the tension radiating from his body.

His hands grip my hips like a brand, ripping my body around until I am face to face with his seething eyes.

“Then I will make it fucking true!” he growls hauling my mouth to his.

Eris had kissed me a thousand times before, not one of those times did I ever enjoy the experience. But this time? This had to be the worst. All of it felt so wrong. Knowing I had a mate. Knowing he was somewhere in this world right now. It made me sick. It was rough, all teeth and tongues. He didn’t want to kiss me, he wanted to devour me.

“Say it!” Eris demanded, breaking apart our so-called kiss.

“I will love your hounds and your mother, I may love your brothers and one day our children, but I will never love you, Eris Vanserra,” I seethed, unable to take much more.

I expected him to growl, or curse or hit me. I expected a thorough lashing for what I had said, but he didn’t even so much as flinch. What scared me more? His mouth curled up in a smirk.

“You forget that you are also a Vanserra now and speaking of heirs, I think it’s time I put one in you right now,” he mused and my stomach bottomed out. “What do you say ‘Jewel of Prythian’ think I can get you knocked up on the first try?” he smiled, backing me to his bed.

There were no words for the terror I felt. No handbook to prepare me for what came next. All I could do was shut down every emotion I had and do my best to become a ghost. A shell of myself.

No matter how hard I tried, it didn’t subdue the pain.

Azriel’s pov:

I thought that getting Cass drunk might help distract him from the feelings floating down the bond tonight, but boy was I fucking wrong.

I had seen my brother lose soldiers and whole infantries. Had seen him lose his first love, the valkyrie, Tanwyn. I was there the day Rhys and y/n went under the mountain and we thought we lost them for good.

None of that compared to the screams of agony that emanated from the male before me.

“He’s fucking hurting her!” Cassian bemoaned, gripping the nearly empty bottle of whiskey.

It didn’t take much to figure out that he could feel everything y/n was feeling through the bond. And at this late hour? It wasn’t hard to guess what Eris was doing to her, and Cassian had to feel every moment of it down the bond.

“Shh calm down Cass you have to try and block her out,” I pleaded with him, gripping his hand in mine.

His eyes were glassed over, his hair tangled from him nearly ripping it out at the roots. He had been like this for well over an hour now, and I almost wished the whiskey would do its job and make him fall asleep simply so he would be unconscious.

“I can’t Az I’ve tried,” he yells at me, nearly slumping to the side from where he sat on the floor leaning against the wall.

Earlier Rhys had spoken into my mind and asked if everything was alright. I had lied of course, telling him everything was fine, not wanting to insert myself in my brother and the princess’ business. Now I wished I had told him to come if only for him to break into Cass’ head and make him sleep. Watching him feel everything his mate was feeling while she was being… well there weren’t words for it.

“Breathe Cass, breathe,” I soothed, trying to get him to catch his breath long enough to breathe in and out fully.

“I-I can’t,” he cried. “My mate.”

His voice resonated with hopelessness and brokenness, reminiscent of the tragedies depicted in literature. This situation felt nothing short of hellish. For centuries, I longed for a mate—a bond that every fae yearned for. But witnessing how it tormented Rhysand, and observing its impact on Cassian, made me question if I truly desired a mate. In my 500 years of life, I had never seen a male stripped down to his core as profoundly as this.

y/n’s pov:

The next morning I woke up late in the day, the atrocities of last night lasting well into the early hours of the morning. It took me a moment to get my bearings. I wasn’t in the House of Wind, I was in Eris’ room. It wasn’t Cassian’s arms around me in a possessive grasp, it was Eris’.

I slowed my heartrate down enough to assess the room around me. Behind me, Eris was fast asleep, which meant I had a few moments to collect myself before he woke. I looked around the room for a second space and found a door ajar that appeared to lead to a bathroom. I saw my opportunity and took it, carefully wiggling out of Eris’ grasp.

My body ached all over, especially between my legs, but I pushed through until I stood from the bed. I tiptoed over to the bathroom, shutting the door as quietly as possible. Thankfully there were two robes hung on the door. The one for Eris made up of thick cotton, and the one for me made of a cream colored silk.

I reached for the silk robe and slipped it over my bare body, noting every large bruise and handprint that littered my skin. A problem for a later time, I told myself.

I must’ve spent fifteen minutes in the bathroom collecting myself. Constantly repeating my new found mantra.

I will not cry.

I spent so long taking deep breaths that I thought I was prepared for whatever came next. But the second I opened the door and saw Eris standing, staring down at the white sheets of the bed expectantly I knew I was sorely mistaken.

“You didn’t bleed,” Eris stated, tossing the bedsheets aside, stalking towards me.

“What do you mean?” I replied feigning innocence like I didn’t know what he meant.

My heart began to beat out of my chest as Eris stalked closer and closer to me. How could I have been so stupid? To overlook the one thing that meant the most to him in this entire facade.

“Virgins are supposed to bleed the first time they are taken by a male, yet you didn’t,” he growled, stepping into my bubble as my back hit the wall. Never in my life had I felt so small. “Which means you weren’t pure when you married me, or when you came to my bed.”

Every nerve in my body froze over as I watched him put together the pieces. There was no telling what happened next, and the only thing I could do was beg for mercy from whatever plans Eris had for a soiled female.

“Eris I-”

“Did you let that Illyrian bastard deflower you?” he gritted out, a rough hand came to grip my throat, slamming my head against the wall.

Tears pricked my eyes. Even if I had wanted to answer, the hand on my neck wouldn’t allow me. I could only shake in terror and anticipation of what would become of me.

“You useless, pathetic fucking whore.” he gritted, hand squeezing tighter with every insult. “Our marriage is now null and void by the traditions of my court, which means you no longer have the protection of being called my wife.”

His hand releases my throat and I have mere seconds to suck down a breath before a harsh slap falls across my cheek, knocking the air from my lungs once again. The next thing I know I’m kneeling on the floor, clutching my face. Eris reaches out a hand to yank me up by my hair.

“Let me show you what we do to ran through sluts in my court,” Eris spits in my face.

His hand doesn’t relinquish its grip from my hair. Instead it begins to drag me out of the room and down the hall. My scalp is burning from the tug on my hair. He takes a back corridor reserved for servants and my bare knees bump, slice and break on the rough stone stairs leading down to wherever he’s taking me.

My hands try to find purchase on the walls around me so that I can ground myself and fight back but it’s impossible.

“ERIS PLEASE!” I scream, but my pleas fall on deaf ears.

We reach a basement room that drops in temperature and he finally releases me. I try to catch my breath as I watch him scribble something on a piece of paper, picking up a hammer and nail. I instantly go to cower in a corner as he walks towards me. The autumn prince pulls me out of my fetal position by my ankles pinning me to the ground beneath his weight.

“In case I did get you pregnant on the first try,” he seethes before I feel a sharp pain to my lower abdomen.

I don’t look down, I can’t look down. Afraid of what I might see there when I do. My eyes roll to the back of my head as Eris grasps my arm and a cloud of darkness washes over us.

When the shadow withdraws my bare skin is whipped and flayed by blistering cold winds. The ground beneath me is soft, but ice cold. I open my eyes long enough to see white as far as the eye can see.

The Winter Court.

“And just in case you get any ideas about utilizing that so-called mating bond,” Eris speaks again before another sharp sting plunges into my side.

White hot pain spreads from the intrusion and spreads like acid moving through my veins. I feel like the blood beneath my skin is on fire, and I almost wish it was in order to combat the blizzard around me. Only one thing could disable me like this, bloodbane. The very same used on Cassian.

“You’ve brought this upon yourself, ‘Jewel of Prythian’. I hope that bastard general was worth your life and your court. Because when Hybern comes to call it won’t be Autumn Court armies that come to your aid.” Eris says, the disgust in his voice evident.

I can’t speak, can’t even think about anything but the agony I feel. The throb from my lower abdomen and from my side. The bite of the wind and snow on my bare skin. I can barely register the cloud of darkness as Eris winnows himself away, leaving me with nothing but a silk robe for warmth.

I reached down with a cold hand to rip the dagger from my side. I hoped if I could stop the bloodbane from spreading that I might be able to use the bond to call Cassian. The second I discard the dagger blood stains the white snow surrounding me, and I realize my mistake. My hand grasps at the open wound, attempting to apply pressure. As I sat there, bleeding and freezing to death I thought of one thing.

It was all for nothing.

All the pain, all the suffering. Hurting Cassian, hurting myself. It had all been for nothing. I was dying and alone, fingers and toes already losing feeling and I still had no army for my people. Cassian nowhere in sight to save my body and my soul. And I would die here knowing that it was all for nothing.

Because time was of the essence, and no one was coming.

Part 10

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lol2345l · 9 months ago

Text

MY VICTOR - finnick odair x f. reader

summary: finnick had always been in love with you from when he was a little boy to a grown man, but ever since the years following his victory of the 65th hunger games when the news of what he must do to protect you hit him it all came crumbling down.

warnings: angst,fluff,self destructive behavior,trauma,!talks of sa…

❛ ━━━━━━・❪🐚❫ ・ ━━━━━━━━━━ ❜

Finnick had always felt this pull towards you. You were like a magnet.

He was seven years old when he first met you, he was sitting alone on the pier overlooking the beautiful seas he loved so much when you sat down by him holding a basket full of shells.

That day he ran home to his family proclaiming that he was in love.

Your families had known each other for a long time and were glad their kids were becoming friends. They often took you two to the beach, your fathers taught you how to fish together and your mothers walked you to school together every morning.

That is until you turned 12 years old and your father had passed in a boating accident.

The Odair family did everything possible to help you and your mother, but the pain was unbearable.

It was also your first ever year of having to participate in the awful and dreadful reaping. Thankfully you had Finnick by your side at all times. He helped ensure you that everything would be fine.

And it was…

Until it wasn’t.

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It was the morning of the annual reaping, the day many citizens of the districts dreaded. Your mother had prepared you a beautiful dress as you stood in front of the slightly cracked mirror admiring it.

You put on your locket, the one Finnick gave you at the beach when you were 12.

Now you were both 14, still closer than ever before sure that nothing could possibly break you apart.

But things change.

You and your mother headed out of your house walking by to the Odair household.

Finnick stood there smiling as he embraced you in a hug.

“You look very nice…” He smiled trailing off as he put his head down, he was blushing.

You chuckled and just smiled at him giving him a polite thank you as his mother embraced you in a hug.

You were used to his comments although there hadn’t been anything between you two yet.

Sure there was hugs,soft kisses to the cheek or forehead but the idea of being something more was never brought up.

You were both very young anyway and you were bound to have more time tho…right?

Right?

It all had happened so fast, every reaping day to you was usually a blur.

The escort of district 4 walked up to the stage picking through the large glass bowl containing the names of the girls, all praying and hoping not the be chosen.

As the name of a 16 year old girl is announced as she walks up to the stage head held high, you sigh deeply.

You were safe again.

You glanced over at Finnick who gave you his soft beautiful smile.

Now it was time for the boys. Your thoughts consumed you completely.

You knew it couldn’t be Finnick, there was no way. He would be safe again and you would be at the beach in a short amount of time swimming and collecting shells together.

“Finnick Odair!” The escort’s voice boomed through the air as your breath caught up in your throat.

You looked up frantically at Finnick, who was already looking at you. He gave you a sad smile and just nodded slowly.

You wanted to scream,cry and run up to him. And just as you were about to step out of the line and run after him, a girl who stood beside you grabbed your wrist tightly.

She tugged you back warning you and all you could do was just stand there. There was nothing else you could do to save him from this. No matter how much you wanted to.

As people began leaving you ran straight to your mother and the Odair’s, who were all being taken by the peacekeepers to see Finnick once more before he goes.

You were already a sobbing mess, but you couldn’t let him see you like that. He was suffering more, and he was about to suffer even more.

Mr and Mrs Odair went in first, your mother was trying to calm you down. As they left the room your mother held Mrs Odair tightly. She was truly distraught and broken, barely even able to stand.

You ran in as fast as you could as you enveloped Finnick into the tightest hug ever possible.

“You will be okay…I know you will. I believe you will, you will come back..Please,promise me you will.” You chocked out sobbing, holding his face gently in your hands.

He nodded, he needed to come back. He knew that. For his family, for you.

He needed to come back to be able to tell you how he truly feels about you. How his proclamation of love for you when he was seven years old was real. How it is real. He needed to come back so he could tell you how much he truly loved you.

“I promise. I’m coming back for you.” He kissed your forehead, a long kiss holding you close. He held you tightly before the peacekeepers rushed you out. Leaving him alone once more, before boarding the train to his uncertain,impending fate.

❛ ━━━━━━・❪🐚❫ ・ ━━━━━━━━━━ ❜

Watching Finnick’s games was one of the worst things you have ever endured in your life.

Tears were flowing everywhere. Mr and Mrs Odair, your mother and you all watched carefully as Finnick won.

Now the tears were somewhat happy tears, tears of relief and joy. No matter what he had done he was coming back. You knew he would.

Finnick always kept his promises.

His victory tour felt as if years passed by, every hour, every minute was closer to Finnick coming back home.

To his family, to you.

And finally he was coming back. Huddled up at the train station, thousands of district 4 citizens were preparing to welcome home their victor.

As the train doors opened slowly, you ran into his arms. He held onto you so tightly, shaking slowly burying his head into the crook of your neck. You could feel a wet spot forming on your shirt from his tears.

Nothing to Finnick mattered anymore, he was back home holding the girl he loves in his arms.

It didn’t matter to him that almost his whole district was waiting for him. His world always stopped when you were there. You were the sun,the light of his day and the entire time in the capitol and in the games to him it had been dark. And now his sun was back to bring the warmth and light back into his world.

You had gently taken his face into your hands, like before he left and smiled nodding to his family.

He ran up to them, holding them tight before turning to wave to everyone.

Your mother stood by you smiling as Finnick continued to talk to his parents.

You had only now realized how tall Finnick really was. Even at 14, he was very grown. Has he always been this tall? Have you noticed too late? And has his hair always looked so good?

You were blushing just at the thought of him.

But you shouldn’t really, afterall Finnick is your best friend.

Later into the night district 4 had a small party for Finnick. You had dinner together with your families and Finnick shared storied about the capitol and confirmed if many of those rumors told around multiple districts were true.

You were glad to have the boy who stuck by you through everthing in life again.

The boy you love.

The one you love truly,madly and deeply.

❛ ━━━━━━・❪🐚❫ ・ ━━━━━━━━━━ ❜

Two years had passed by since Finnick’s games. The 67th games rolled in and you were thanfully safe once again.

Finnick dealt with bad nightmares as you tried to help him and console him. You let him into your house each time he would run to you from the victors village. Not crying until you opened the door.

You offered for him to stay with you because he was already running to you every night but he didn’t want to burden you and your mother.

Even though he would never be a burden to you ever you didn’t want to argue with him about it.

He deserved peace in any possible way he could get it. Even if it meant running to your house at 3am just to crawl into your bed.

As the 67th games came to an end Finnick was finally back home.

His birthday followed shortly after as his mother,father, your mother and you celebrated together in his house.

A loud knock on the door startled you and you got up to open it. You figured it would be Finnick’s mentor and neighbor Mags, but you were met with another very familiar face.

“President Snow.” You let out a small gasp as Finnick stands up from his spot on the couch rushing to the door quickly.

“Mr Odair, just the man I wanted to see. Happy birthday boy.” He chuckled as he stepped in, Finnick immediately led him to the study his father used.

It felt odd. The entire interaction but you brushed it off letting them talk whatever victor business they had to talk about.

It had already been about an hour and Mags joined you all.

Her expression had worried you deeply as you told her where Finnick was.

President Snow stepped out of the door without a word, just a slight nod at Mags.

A couple moments later everybody was staring at the door of the study.

Finnick emerged, eyes bloodshot red as he just ran out slamming the door behind him. His father got up quickly but his mother sat him back down.

You got up and ran out after him, towards the private beach of the victors village. Your heart broke into a million pieces. Seeing Finnick pacing around on the sand, hands running through his hair repeatedly as tears began to fall.

You didn’t think twice and just ran up to him hugging him tightly. He just fell apart in your arms.

The capitol facade gone. Just a boy from district four crying in the arms of the girl he loves so desperately, the girl who’s heart will break to find out what he must do to keep her safe.

So he resorts to the alternative.

He lies.

Finnick explained he was just stressed and overwhelmed with the victor duties and business, lying about how Snow wanted him to socialize more. His parents believed it and let it go, you barely did. But you did.

After all you didn’t know how it was to be a victor. But if it was always like this, it sure as hell wasn’t as sweet and perfect as they said on all of those capitol broadcasts.

That night you and Finnick shared your first ever kiss. A long,loving and passionate kiss. This time on the lips for a change.

And you were beaming. It was finally happening.

He was ecstatic. The kiss made him forget all about what Snow said. He knew he had to do it anyway. He just got you, he couldn’t lose you so quick.

❛ ━━━━━━・❪🐚❫ ・ ━━━━━━━━━━ ❜

Ever since that night on the beach you and Finnick had been together.

As the tragedy of Mr and Mrs Odair’s passing struck it hit you like a truck. They were like your second set of parents. A big part of your family.

Their passing was so sudden and yet nobody questioned anything. No matter how close you had been you never found out how they died. Finnick said it was a boating accident, but their boat was still at the docks.

You didn’t want to question it any further as Finnick was clearly already struggling with everything, and who were you to scold him some more now?

The reaping for the 69th hunger games came quicker than ever. Your last reaping.

Thankfully you were safe once more and now it was over. You were now 18 years old and free from having to participate in the games. It was truly a blessing.

Although something with Finnick was completely off.

He would come home from the capitol angry and distraught. You tried to confront him and ask him whats wrong but he would just shut you out.

He would either just storm out or lock himself in the bathroom.

He couldn’t escape you though, he was the one who asked you to move in anyway.

It was a constant battle. Finnick coming back home angry,lashing out and then holding you tightly in bed asking for your forgiveness for how he acted towards you.

You didn’t know how to feel. How were you supposed to react when the slightest thing could set him off?

How were you supposed to even act around him when you didn’t even know what was wrong?

So you took it upon yourself. Next time he came back home you stopped him in front of the bathroom.

You had begged him to tell you what was wrong. You were already a sobbing mess as he just shook his head. His eyes glistening slightly, tears threatening to flow.

“I need to take a shower…Please just move.” He told you, his voice cracking slightly. He wanted to fall into your arms and cry. He wanted to tell you everything so badly. But he already lost his family, he had to suck it up and do it for you.

He could still feel their lingering hands all over his body and all he wanted to do was just shower. Scrub away his skin and the rose scent of the capitol.

You just moved away from the door. You gathered some of your things and ran out of the front door.

You went home to your mother and didn’t tell Finnick. You figured he heard the door slam.

He did. He heard it loud and clear. He knew he had to tell you at some point. Because he was losing you. He stood in the warm shower for at least three hours, just scrubbing at his skin over and over again.

He didn’t want to have to tell you. He didn’t want to do this. He felt disgusting. He loves you so much. You trust him and he has to do this behind your back. Sell himself to the hungry capitol citizens.

He wished it was you. He wished it was just you. Every client he compares to you. The way their eyes will never be that same beautiful color that yours are, and the way they will never shine in the sunlight the way yours do.

He prays for it all to end as fast as possible, so he could go home back to you. But when he sees you it hurts. It hurts that you don’t have a clue about why he’s gone all the time, why he comes back so distraught.

So he just does what he became best at. He lies again.

He shuts you out saying he’s fine, he showers and climbs into bed falling asleep. And he repeats the cycle every time he comes back from the capitol.

Until one night.

You stayed up waiting for him. You couldn’t do it anymore. Did he find someone else? Was there someone special in the capitol? Was she prettier? Was she funnier? Did he enjoy her company more?

All those thoughts consumed you as he entered the house. The door slammed.

You knew what kind of night it was. He would just shower and ignore you completely. He wouldn’t even argue.

But you weren’t letting him do it anymore. You got up from the couch, his eyes wide as he saw you.

You looked up at him, shirt unbuttoned slightly, hair tousled and ruffled.

And then the worst of all. The marks on his neck.

That confirmed all of your suspicions. You and Finnick hadn’t done anything like that yet. He was very gentle with you and you were with him aswell. On the days where he was somewhat okay.

You just stood there, and he stood there aswell. Complete silence until your sobs and cries were filling up the room. Bouncing off of the walls.

He stepped closer and you just backed away. What else where you meant to do? You love Finnick more than anything. You were always there for him. You never ever said anything to him even when he acted like you were absolutely nothing to him.

“Please…just let me-” He tried to say before you cut him off. Before your hands, much smaller compared to his chest pushed him back.

“I’m not letting you do anything anymore!” You screamed out through your sobs. You could barely breathe. The anger and sadness all combined into one practically controlling you.

It had been a very long night of fighting. You kept going back and forth and he still didn’t give you a reasonable explanation. You were sure every resident of the victors village heard you two. He still wasn’t giving you any answers.

Finnick was about to crack, but he couldn’t. It was safer if you didn’t know. He just sat there letting you yell at him. What else could he do? You were right about everthing anyway.

That is until you got up and left.

You couldn’t do it anymore. The silence was eating you alive, so you ran out of the house and ran to the beach you and Finnick loved so much as kids.

You needed to be as far as possible from the victors village and one certain victor.

Finnick. The man you love, your Finnick. Had supposedly found someone better.

Was that what he wanted? Did he need more from you? Was what you were giving not enough?

One again your thoughts consumed you, you barely even realized that you were crying once again and also barely noticed the strong arms that had embraced you.

Finnick.

He followed you to the beach because he had to tell you. It was time. He couldn’t keep you in the dark anymore, it would only drive you further away from him.

“President Snow is selling me.” He blurted out. He didn’t even try to sugarcoat it. It was the harsh truth, and saying it out loud while holding the girl he loves in his arms truly made it sound even worse.

You looked up at him mouth agape. At first it took you a moment to register what he just said. Selling him? And then it hit you.

The bruises you noticed over the past few months, the marks on his neck.

All you could do was gasp. You cupped his face as gently as possible as now his tears were flowing like you’ve never seen before.

You held him that night, at the beach, at home and in bed. He told you everything.

You felt sick.

Not because you were disgusted by him, but because you were disgusted by what your supposedly great leader of Panem was doing to the man you love. He was ruining him.

He told you all about the victors trade. Each information he gave you broke your heart more. And when he finished it was just little bits and pieces left. It felt as if somebody stabbed you.

“I never wanted to do any of this…I only wanted to stay..I only wanted you.” He said his head was on your chest and you were playing with his hair.

“I know, I know.” You assured him kissing his head gently but passionately.

All he had ever done was for you. Every little thing. From helping you carry your shells home to selling himself just to ensure your safety. You were beyond grateful.

You promised him that you would never judge him, that you would hold him forever.

And that you did.

Each night when he came back you were there to hold him, help him scrub his skin, spray your vanilla perfume he loved so much all over the house and him to get rid of the smell of roses that lingered on his body and clothes.

You took care of him. You always would. It was him and you against the world. Against the awful and unfair world you lived in.

But your love was stronger. Strong enough to overcome the capitol. Snow couldn’t break you.

Even if he wanted to, you would always find your way back to each other.

And now holding him in bed as he finally calmed down, it felt as if it was just you and Finnick in the world.

Just you and your victor.

❛ ━━━━━━・❪🐚❫ ・ ━━━━━━━━━━ ❜

HI GUYSSS!!! I hope you like this one i’m not so sure how I feel about it…

BUT ANYWAYS thank you @coca-lastic for the idea and I hope you like it!!!

Thank you for reading my previous post and thank you so much for all of the reposts and likes it means a lot 💝

#finnick x reader #finnick fanfic #finnick imagine #finnick odair #finnick odair angst #finnick odair fluff #finnick x y/n #finnick x you #hunger games finnick #thg finnick #hunger games #thg series #thg #thg fanfiction

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ecstasyhighway · 1 month ago

Text

Where home is | gabriel reyes

husband!gabriel ‘reaper’ reyes x wife!reader

cw: some spanish! angst? fluff? idk , p in v , smut!! , military/blackwatch au? , breeding kink (?) i think thats it?? lmk if i missed anything

an: naw i dont speak spanish i used a translatior so i apologize for any mistakes, and irdc if he doesn’t speak it either its a headcannon guys leave me alonee. uhhh anyways i need him

wc: 2k ish

not proofread

It has been 12 months and 3 days since Gabriel left for a Blackwatch mission, no calls, no texts, nothing. Although you know he's busy and can't talk, you still miss him.

The house feels empty, even with your 2-year-old daughter Eliana running around it still feels empty. There have been endless nights of crying and on those nights you send Eliana to your mother's house. You miss him, you really do.

On Monday morning a package arrived addressed to you, from an unknown sender. You slowly open the box and see a cute plush bear holding a heart with the words I love you, you smile and tears swell in your eyes. You reach deeper into the box and feel an envelope. Inside the envelope was a letter from your husband, Gabriel.

"Mi reina, I miss you with all my heart. There is not a day that I do not think of you and Eliana. I am sorry that I am not able to contact you, this is a complicated mission but we are almost done. I will be home soon, wait for me - Gabe"

Those last words bring immense joy to your heart, your husband will be home soon! You will finally be able to hug your man, kiss him, hold him, and cry to him. You can finally relax knowing he is alive and home with you and your daughter.

It has been 2 months since you received the news from your husband, every day felt like a stab in the chest. You were beginning to lose hope, you weren't sure if he was coming home. The thought of him never coming home was enough to send you into a depression, but you refused. You knew he would come home, he has to.

It was 1 am on a Friday, you were asleep in your bed when the door unlocked and opened. Your husband made his way to your shared room and sighed happily. He walked to your sleeping body and carefully shook you awake. Your eyes opened slowly trying to focus on the blob before you. Immediately your senses were filled with the smell of Gabriel's cologne, you shot up and threw your arms around the man, sobbing as he held you close.

"I'm home mi amor," he said softly as a tear fell from his eye. You grabbed him pulling him onto the bed, peppering his face in kisses, you looked into his eyes and smiled feeling his weight on your body, your legs wrapped around his torso as you kissed him passionately, savoring the moment, afraid it would vanish into nothing if you didn't.

"I missed you so much Gabe" you sighed softly against his lips. His calloused hands grab you softly as he rolls onto his back making you straddle him. The kiss deepened as your tongues danced around each other, his hands resting on your ass kneading into the soft flesh. He breaks the kiss to suck at your neck, searching for that spot that makes you whimper. Your body involuntarily grinds on him as you enjoy the feeling of his lips on your body. "I missed you, and this body…fuck, forgot how sexy my wife was" he murmured against your skin, hands roaming over your body pulling you impossibly closer.

You pull away and look into his eyes "I was so scared… I was so worried you wouldn't come home…" you admit to him as tears fall down your cheek. He wipes the tears from your face and stares at you lovingly "I know, but m' here now, and I won't be leaving for a while." with a newfound urgency he captures your mouth in his, you could feel the passion and hunger in his kiss. A fire ignited in your body and he grabbed your thighs to encourage you to continue grinding, you felt him harden beneath you and you gasped "Missed you s'much… I need you s'bad…please" a smirk forms on his lips hearing those words.

He grabs at your shirt, almost tearing it off. Gabriel trails kisses down your body, starting at your neck and working his way lower. He peppers soft, open-mouthed kisses across your collarbone, down between your breasts, and over your stomach. Each kiss sends little shivers of pleasure through your body, making you squirm with impatience.

Finally, he reaches your core. He spreads your thighs wider and settles between them, looking up at you with dark, hungry eyes.

"So beautiful," he murmurs, before leaning in to inhale deeply at your entrance. The warm puff of air against your sensitive flesh makes you gasp.

"Gabe, please..." you whimper, desperate for him to taste you.

He smirks at your plea, then dips his head lower. His tongue flicks out, running from the bottom of your slit up to your clit in one long, slow lick. The flat of his tongue presses against your most sensitive bundle of nerves, sending sparks of pleasure through your body.

"Mmm," he hums against you, the vibration adding to the sensory overload. He begins to lap at you in earnest, his tongue circling your clit before dipping lower to spear inside you. He alternates between these two motions, occasionally sucking gently on your clit.

Your hips buck involuntarily, seeking more friction. Gabriel reaches up to grip your thighs, holding you still so he can set his own pace. "quit moving, lemme take my time… missed this pussy- missed your taste" The wet sounds of his tongue lapping at your juices fill the room, mingling with your soft moans and gasps. He inserts a finger into your hole finding that spongy spot on the inside of your walls, a cry leaves your throat at the stimulation. He continues licking your puffy clit and pumping his fingers as you leak down his chin. You feel that familiar knot tie in your core "Please- fuck m'so close Gabe please" he pushes your legs back opening you further, he speeds up his movements feeling you clench around his fingers, he groans into your pussy sending vibrations up your spine sending you over the edge. Your legs shake as you cum on his face with a cry "That's it, atta girl" he coaxes you through your orgasm, still pumping his fingers to help you through it. Once your breathing steadies he kisses you once again, letting you taste yourself.

"You taste so sweet, I could eat you all day" he chuckles softly as he rubs soft circles on your swollen clit, overstimulating you. "I..mmf- know but that can wait, i need you in me right n..now" you whine over choked moans. He smiles as he swiftly undresses, revealing his strong body. You bite your lip in anticipation and a whine escapes you. He lets his cock free and it slaps against his abdomen, he gives it a few strokes before putting it against your slit. He uses your cum and slick as a lube, rubbing the tip against your clit causing you to shake "Stop teasin' Gabe-" he slips his hard cock into your slippery hole making you cut yourself off with a moan.

The stretch is so delicious, you could cum again. His pace is slow as he takes in the warmth of your cunt "fóllame princesa, me perdí este coño" he curses under his breath as he pushes himself deeper. your nails scratch at his back as he thrusts into you, his head falls into the crook of your neck to suck on it leaving dark hickeys claiming you as his. his pace fastens as he thrusts into you, the lewd sounds of skin slapping fills the room. your eyes roll to the back of your head as you dig your nails deeper into his skin, wrapping your legs around his waist pushing him impossibly deeper. your orgasm approaches quickly and your cunt squeezes around his cock as he slams into you. the bed creaking with each harsh thrust.

"shit, you're so tight," he groans, his hips snapping forward with each thrust. "I'm not gonna last much longer." The thought of him cumming inside you pushes you closer to the edge. you reach down to rub your clit, desperate for release. The added stimulation combined with his relentless pace sends you careening over the edge once again. "oh fuck, Gabe, i'm cumming!" you cry out, your cunt clenching around him like a vice. The feeling of your walls pulsing and fluttering around his cock is too much for him to bear.

With a final, powerful thrust, Gabriel buries himself deep inside you as he finds his own release. You can feel his hot seed flooding your core, triggering another wave of pleasure that crashes over you. He collapses on top of you, both of you panting heavily as you come down from your highs.

He pulls out and gives your pussy a smack causing you to yelp. gabriel watches as his cum seeps out of your cunt, growing hard at the sight, "fuck…look at that… she so messy hmm? my wife and her pussy are so gorgeous" you blush at his words as arousal builds in your core once again. "mmm aún no he terminado, m'gonna get you pregnant again"

with that he throws your legs over his shoulders, putting you in a mean mating press, allowing him to sink deep into your heat. the warmth of his body weighing on yours excites you, bringing you comfort and peace knowing your husband is finally home.

his tip brushes against your cervix with each thrust, the feeling being both uncomfortable and pleasant "look at me mi amor, look at me while i make love to you" you meet his gaze, eyes filled with hunger and lust for you, he kisses you passionately as he continues fucking you like he hates you. "gabe.. youre so deep fuck" he groans in response The mating press allows you to feel every inch of his thick, hard length as he slides in and out of your dripping wet pussy. Your bodies are pressed so close together that you can feel the heat of his skin, the pounding of his heart, and the raggedness of his breaths.

tears begin to fall down your cheeks as you feel your orgasm build in your body, the intense pleasure and overstimulation adding to it. "gabe-fuck im gonna cum again..ngh" you gasp and squeeze around his length as your legs tremble. his pace doesn't falter as he continues thrusting, bringing you closer to the edge. your orgasm crashes into you like a tidal wave making your back arch slightly. a powerful wave of liquid escapes you as your eyes roll to the back of your skull, fat tears running down your cheeks from the pleasure. He groans deeply and continues his movement, hips stuttering as he cums deep inside you, not moving for a second leaving both of you breathing heavily.

he pulls out and softly removes your legs from his shoulders, massaging them as he looks at you with nothing but love and affection. He kisses your lips once more before getting up and grabbing a towel to clean you both up. by the time he's back with a warm wet towel you had fallen asleep. He wipes your cum filled cunt softly as he listens to your breathing and smiles. He gets into bed with you, bringing you closer to him and hugging you tightly as he whispers "I love you" before he joins you in slumber. naked bodies tangled together, warmth surrounding each other, nothing but comfort and peace fills the air.

you wake up to a heavy arm around your waist. you turn around to see your beautiful husband snoring obnoxiously loud, you giggle softly as you admire him, recalling the events from last night. you grab your phone and tell your mother to bring eliana home.

30 minutes later your daughter is home, filled with joy and laughter knowing her dad is home. you're making pancakes, bacon and eggs when you hear eliana squeal with excitement before running up to gabriel "DADDY!!! YOURE HOME" she jumps into his arms kissing him on the cheek "hi cariño i missed you" he says gruffly peppering her little face in kisses causing her to giggle. you smile watching everything unfold in front of you, happy that your husband is home, making your family complete once again.

translations: mi reina - my queen, mi amor - my love, fóllame princesa, me perdí este coño - fuck me princess, I missed this pussy, mmm aún no he terminado - mmm im not done yet, cariño - dear/sweetheart.

#—ecstasyhighway #reaper overwatch #overwatch fanfiction #overwatch fluff #overwatch #overwatch smut #reaper ow #gabriel reyes #reaper x reader #gabriel reaper reyes #gabriel reyes smut #reaper ow smut #reaper smut #writers on tumblr

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