#thanks inflation

[duke-and-acceptance]

I cant even give up anymore, the price is to high.

[performing-personhood]

When your utility bill is $240 and you're about as handy around the house as a paralyzed cat, you spend the afternoon before a snowstorm putting Frog Tape around each one of your shitty cracked & leaking window frames.

[michelleplayswithfire]

pt. 2

i had realized something else too

i rarely bought groceries this year

no newsletters, posts or pics of george since june or july :(

i bought more uber eats than groceries

and no trip to NYC :(

i broke my own heart :(

[breadmecoshy]

Oumota comic, Part 2

Headcanon - Kaito has nicotine withdrawal during the events of Danganronpa V3 (among other things, what happens to him there). Just a cute little comic

Part 1: https://www.tumblr.com/breadmecoshy/736606178824650752/oumota-comic-part-1?source=share

Plot Twist - After finishing the main game (which we all want to believe was a simulation), Tsumugi became so attached to the guys at V3 that she talked Danganronpa's company into launching a spin-off in romcom format in which she would try to bring together the couples most popular with viewers

joke (or maybe not)

[reunitedinterlude]

summer phantasy: the album

tracks 17-20 (x)

[charmac]

S9E10 | S12E10 | S16E01

Mac & Dennis' Apartment Furniture — Destroyed, Restored, Replaced

[cinnasalmon]

Hi! I have a question. Could you give us tips for doodling more "handsome" Zevlors? Do you follow all the wrinkles lines? In which features do you focus on more? Your Zevlor art is the best 🥹

Cbehcnsjbajc this is one of the best compliments ever 🥹 of course!! This is long. Sorry 😅

Zevlor has a very unique look which makes drawing him difficult yet easy at the same time. It’s virtually impossible to make him look like someone else, even without his iconic horns.

He has a lot going on his face (sorry gramps) that you dont have to feature ALL the lines and contours of his face to know it’s him. i.e. he has triangular/angular face, horns that continue underneath his skin, wrinkles from age (and stress), etc.

In fact these are really the only lines I make sure to use for him:

More under the cut!

I also like to give him downturned eyes (when I remember…) bc why not, even tho he doesn’t really have them:

And his eyebrows. I like to feature them bc they add expression. You almost never see his eyebrows in-game.

He’s got some juicy lips that I don’t go out of my way to showcase bc to me his sad tired eyes and wrinkles are the hottest parts about him tbqh. But a smooch from those things would change my life…. I just know they’re soft and plushy

Anyway enough oogling. I add plenty of lines but still try to keep it cohesive. Recently I’ve been adding a line or two under his jaw that I like the look of:

Really adds to that old man fucker feel ya know? Gotta let the people know his elasticity is on its way out.

And then Young Zevlor I mainly just do lines from his horns. He’s still got that collagen to rely on

And bonus wrinkle doodle just because:

So yeah! I hope this helps somewhat… to me, I just draw him and am very lucky it is well received by beautiful souls like you! 🙏

[clownsuu]

have a nice day!!

((i'm sending congratulations in advance, because when I have your birthday, I will sleep soundly))

AWEAWEAWE ALL OF MY LIL GOOBERSSSSSSS ;;;;;

[coolnonsenseworld]

Samurai and Ninja in crappy pics because December here is under a constant cloud and I just want y'all to see them all golden and cute without learning how to take aesthetic pictures 🥴 💙❤️😆🥰

linktr.ee/Mezzy

[performing-personhood]

I'm sitting here trying to sell off my pint glass collection, old beer shirts, and household items to make a couple hundred extra dollars.

I quit drinking in spring of this year, I told everyone it was because of my new antidepressant but it was also secretly about saving money on beer.

I cancelled all of my patreon pledges.

I've spent less than a hundred bucks on clothes this entire year.

I compulsively add coupons to my grocery store club card.

I limit my snack purchases to x1 $5 box of Little Debbies per grocery trip, and two twelve-racks of the cheapest sodas and seltzers that I can find per month.

I DO smoke cigarettes but I don't smoke at all during the daytime, and I go through maybe two packs per week.

Because I've been unemployed since my complete emotional breakdown in July of 2021 (and then remained unemployed because my widowed isolated father's cascading series of breakdowns in the time hence left me without the Spoons to process and move on from my failed 20-year career) I've gone out of my way to reduce my spending as much as possible to offset the income I'm not bringing in. I've made big changes to my lifestyle in the service of making ends meet.

Meanwhile, in the month of October alone, my (employed, breadwinner, half-pack-a-day smoker) partner spent $375 at various gas stations for beer and tobacco, and has made precisely zero changes to his lifestyle.

As the bill-paying half of the relationship, does anyone wanna tell me how the fuck I'm supposed to have this conversation? Ideally without my partner dissolving into a heap of familial-trauma-based insecurities and self-loathing??

[alumints]

⚔️ TGAA/DGS Asoryuu dolls ⚔️ I made unofficial Asougi and Ryuunosuke plushies!!! Explore, eat, and fight for justice with your very own aibous ⚖️⚔️ They are 20 cm tall and will include an adoption card! All the stretch goals have been unlocked and the bonus items will be included for eligible orders: ✦ Two stickers will be given per plush ✦ One enamel pin will be given per pair Pre-order end April 30th 11:59 PM PST 🌸 http://alumints.com 🌸

[heavypressure]

Felt a bit bloated after a lunch break at work, but it's probably nothing noticeable...

(😔It would be so great if i would just randomly bloat up to ridiculous sizes in public, farting and belching loudly, panicking and trying to hide my disgustingly swollen middle, only for other people to stare in horror at my belly)

[woman-respecter]

don’t you know who i am? i am an internet microcelebrity among tired jews on tumblr!

[jtl-fics]

Fluent Freshman - 41

PREV

Two and a half hours into the Banquet and FF had not moved from the chair he had sat in at the start of the banquet. He hadn’t gotten up for water. Hadn’t gotten up to go to the bathroom. Hadn’t gotten up to dance despite Nicky’s pleading. He hadn’t even gotten up when a Raven had come over and asked him to.

He was not leaving his seat.

The stadium could be on fire and he’d still try to be the last one out.

Until there was a time where he could slide out of this chair without a single eye on him and put on his winter jacket without it seeming strange he was going to remain seated.

The answer on why was under his precisely placed napkin.

It had all begun about an hour and fifteen minutes ago, not that FF was counting. Dinner had been wrapping up and people had started to get up and jostle about. Flirtations were flying across the table and generally over FF’s head. The team had been smiling, there’d been laughter, and it had seemed unlikely for anything to go wrong.

He relaxed and that’s where he made a mistake.

FF could not eat the meal served. He’d had his liquid dinner on the way over on the bus so it didn’t bother him much to have a decent looking meal in front of him and not being able to eat it. He wasn’t going to eat so he hadn’t even unwrapped his cutlery, wanting to save the clean up crew from at least his set of utensils. He hadn’t placed the napkin over his lap to protect himself, what danger could there possibly be when he was not going to be eating?

The danger came when a Trojan smacked the table hard as he laughed at something that he had taken as a joke but, knowing Kevin, was probably a serious suggestion.

Hit the table hard enough to jostle FF’s plate.

Hit the table hard enough to jostle FF’s plate and more specifically a meatball that was with the pasta served with the beef tenderloin.

Hit the table hard enough to jostle FF’s plate and more specifically a meatball that was with the pasta served with the beef tenderloin so that it fell off of his plate and onto his lap.

Fell right onto his unprotected lap.

FF had looked down at his gray pants now irreversibly blemished by the errant meatball. His mind flashing back to when Nicky had decided on these pants. Remembers how Nicky hadn’t wanted him to vanish in the lower lighting of the banquet.

FF had grabbed his cutlery and put the napkin over his lap, far too late to save his pants, but fast enough that no one would see that he had spaghetti pants.

After that the trajectory of his evening had changed dramatically.

He was going to sit here all night until they were getting into the bus and then he’d have his winter jacket on and it was a long jacket that would cover his mark of shame. You might think that FF could just slip under the radar and go try and clean off the stain or at least hide somewhere less conspicuous.

He would, he really would, except he can feel the eyes of Captain Jeremy on him regardless of how low his presence is. FF entered into Ultra Stealth but Captain Jeremy merely turned to him and asked a friendly question that had Nicky startle remembering that FF was next to him still. 

Captain Jeremy has x-ray vision and can see the wall behind the wallpaper. Captain Jeremy can see colors that mantis shrimp can only dream of. Captain Jeremy is standing in some secret government office pointing on the radar as CIA and Military officials look on going “What are you talking about he’s right here?” with a smile.

Captain Jeremy was the kid that ate all the cheap fruit on a dessert table before he looked at the cake when he was a kid.

It’s the first time in his entire life that he’d been completely unable to slip below someone’s attention and if it were any other time he might feel good about that. Might enjoy the idea of being seen and having the attention of someone like Captain Jeremy on him.

Except FF has Spaghetti Pants.

FF cannot escape the man’s determination to ‘make it up’ to him after Aaron had let slip that FF had a restraining order against one of his brothers.

FF insisted that it was okay.

Captain Jeremy insisted on making sure he had a good time.

FF insisted that a good time for him would be to sit at this table all night by himself. He kept to himself that what would really make it would be for him to sit without anyone around to notice he had spaghetti pants.

Captain Jeremy seemed to think that it was due to the still healing stomach injury and insisted on at least keeping him company then, unaware of the unvoiced second part.

So Captain Jeremy of the USC Trojans had declared himself FF’s banquet buddy. A man that was friends or at least friendly with almost every single player here at the banquet.

He looks around the banquet and sees the various tense standoffs at the other tables. These were men and women who would find even the smallest thing and never let you forget it.

He doesn’t know what he’d do if they realize he had spaghetti pants.

How does one recover on the court when the person you’re up against can remember the cold December evening that you dumped a meatball on your pants? He can already hear the jeering nicknames.

He wants to sink into his seat but he’s afraid to shift at all, worried he’ll dislodge the napkin in some way and the newest person coming up to say ‘Hi’ to Jeremy Knox will notice the marinara stain on his pants.

While Jeremy was distracted he did try to wet Nicky’s disposed of napkin to perhaps clean himself off a bit except before he could a Raven came up to him, “Come with me.” a large Raven Backliner says, jerking his head towards the bathrooms.

“No thank you.” FF answers in return, “I don’t need to do that.” he says assuming that the Backliner had seen him shift in his seat and assume he needed to use the restroom.

The Raven Backliner stood for a few moments as if waiting for him to change his mind but then Captain Jeremy’s attention snapped back, “Can we help you with something?” Captain Jeremy asks and his friendly demeanor had vanished.

“I-” The Raven Backliner started to say before seemingly deciding that it wasn’t worth it and walked away.

Captain Jeremy and him continued to talk. They had somehow fallen onto the SAW movie franchise and FF could admit that he was surprised that the Trojan Captain had watched the series.

“You need to come with me.” A Raven Striker says coming up and interrupting the two of them as they talked about the ethics of SAW. FF believed that it was all well and good to learn to appreciate life but there had to be simpler ways to go about teaching that. Jeremy didn’t disagree, he just also thought that sometimes there were some people who Jigsaw never intended to redeem and those people may have deserved their fates.

FF tilts his head, “Do I?” he asks since it didn’t seem like the ERC had made any sort of announcement and she seems utterly and completely perplexed by his response.

The girl looks at him, looks over her shoulder, looks back at him, “Yes?” she responds sounding so unsure that even FF wouldn’t believe her.

“I don’t think he does.” Captain Jeremy interrupts gaze utterly cooled from the warm one he had been giving FF throughout their philosophical debate.

The Raven Striker looks cowed and FF almost feels bad for her but not bad enough to console her when he has spaghetti pants.

She leaves.

FF and Captain Jeremy’s conversation shifts to winter break plans. Captain Jeremy is going home to his family and he’s taking Jean Moreau with him. “I think my mom likes him more than she likes me sometimes.” Jeremy laughs heartily. “He deserves nice holidays though so I’m always happy to bring him up.” he says voice and features going soft as he looks to where Jean Moreau was standing with a raised eyebrow next to Andrew as Kevin and Neil were having some animated conversation.

FF talks about his own plans with the Foxes and how he’ll be spending the break with them. He thinks Captain Jeremy looks a little sad about that but whatever sadness there is Captain Jeremy moves past it quickly and starts to ask if he had plans to go anywhere specific in New York. He heartily recommends the LEGO store when FF says he’s never been.

“Someone important wishes to speak with you.” An Offensive Dealer from the Ravens says and he looks like he’s about to shake apart as he stands in front of them.

“Who?” He asks, tilting his head and sipping his water.

The Dealer looks at him.

“Is it that hard of a question to answer?” Captain Jeremy asks voice stern once again.

“He’s…Master is-” The Dealer goes paler and Smith can’t help but pull out his handkerchief from his front suit pocket as he sees the Dealer break out into a cold sweat.

“You don’t look well, maybe you should sit down?” he asks with his handkerchief extended in offer. The man looks at him and then the handkerchief and then takes it. “Thank you.” he says 

“Wow a handkerchief? My pocket square is just a fake one sewed in.” Captain Jeremy laughs jovial once again as the Raven took a seat shakily.

“It’s something my dad used to always say.” Smith thinks about the additional handkerchiefs in his pockets. “A gentleman always has a handkerchief on hand to help.” He pulls out a second one, “A real gentleman has two.” he adds and folds the new handkerchief into shape for the pocket square again.

Captain Jeremy laughs, “Sounds like a great guy! He must be happy you took his advice to heart.” he says and it doesn’t hurt that bad when Captain Jeremy is saying it since he’s saying something so nice.

“I hope so.” he agrees and doesn’t feel like ruining the mood.

Captain Jeremy turns his attention back onto the Raven who has taken a seat and his eyes soften on the Raven, “Wow you really are pale. Not a lot of sunlight in the Nest?” he asks.

The Dealer swallows, now visibly the most nervous person at the table which is saying something considering that FF is at the table.”I-I’m just pale naturally.” he denies.

“Sit and talk with us until you feel better.” Captain Jeremy insists, “What’s your name by the way?” he asks.

“Michael.” He answers awkwardly.

“Great, my name is Jeremy,” Captain Jeremy points at himself, “and this is Smith. So, have you ever been to New York City before?” he asks

Captain Jeremy, FF, and Michael chat at length about Michael’s New York pizza recommendations. Captain Jeremy asks about some of the places he has been in New York and the longer Michael is there chatting the more color comes to his face and the more vehement he becomes that Captain Jeremy managed to pick all the worst places by accident.

“You’re kidding me! It was 10 bucks a slice, it has to be good!” Captain Jeremy exclaims looking as if Michael was telling him Santa and the Easter Bunny weren’t real.

“If you’re paying more than $2.50 it’s a rip.” Michael insists passionately. “If it’s more expensive than the subway ticket then it’s a racket!” he slams his fist down at the table.

“You mean to tell me that I was lied to by that person I followed on Twitter?” Captain Jeremy asks, appalled.

“Swindled.” Michael insists.

“Christ, I’ve given that recommendation to so many people.” Captain Jeremy and while gesturing he puts his elbow in his own remaining spaghetti, “Oh shit.” he says. Smith looks at the black suit jacket and thinks about a future one step to the left where he had on black pants and a black suit jacket.

“I’m sure it’s good.” FF tries to comfort offering Jeremy his third handkerchief, this one from his left pocket since the one in his breast pocket was a specific color for the ‘look’ that Nicky had wanted. “It’s just not representative of a New York slice,” he adds.

“Thanks Smith.” Captain Jeremy takes the handkerchief wetting it with the glass of water nearby and wiping away the excess of marinara and spaghetti. “I’m going to go wash this off and try to dry it for you.” he says holding the handkerchief up.

“You don’t have to do that.” FF says but Jeremy is waving him off as he stands.

“Sit tight, I’ll be right back.” he says and heads off.

FF turns to Michael, “So I shouldn’t trust anything more than $2.50?” he asks.

Michael shakes his head and turns to look at FF, “Absolutely not.” he says with a smile before FF can see his eyes flick away and he stiffens. “Hey, it’s…” he looks down and the handkerchief, “it’s been nice chatting with you but… is there anyway we can take this conversation somewhere else?” he asks.

FF blinks, “No, I’m not getting up until the party is over.” Smith declines because by this point the stain has set. There is no stealthily cleaning it now that Captain Jeremy has left.

“So, you’ll get up once the banquet is over?” Michael asks leaning across the table and as he does that Smith can see a fairly ugly bruise on the Dealer’s forehead.

“I’ll have to won’t I?” he asks because despite the not-zero possibility that he’ll get left behind by the team again. His gaze shifts to Nicky who is leaning heavily against Matt as the two sway back and forth dancing and laughing. Probably about 50/50 at this point, depending on how quickly FF can make his way out of the stadium.

Michael looks at him and there’s something in his eyes that feels saddened, “Yeah, I guess that’s true.” he says before rising to his feet. “Thank you for this.” he says and hands the handkerchief back. FF can’t help but notice how there was a schmear of make-up on it.

The Dealer walks off and FF waves him off with the handkerchief before sliding it back into his right pocket, where he kept dirty handkerchiefs. He lets his eyes wander across the banquet. He sees Aaron and Katelyn slow dancing to a song that is not a slow dance. He sees Kevin and Jean now in the middle of a passionate conversation. Jack is pouting by the punch bowl with a few other Sophomores patting him on the back. Sheena is seemingly trying to flirt with the older bartender. Nicky and Matt have somehow only gotten sloppier in the 2 minutes between when he last looked at them and now. Captain Neil and Andrew are at the dessert table and he sees Andrew offering Captain Neil a chocolate covered strawberry. He sees a gaggle of his fellow freshmen huddled together all sipping their drinks nervously he moves to wave them over back to the table. Threat of the reveal of his spaghetti pants aside he’s not used to be alone anym-

“What the fuck did you just say?!” He hears behind him.

“I said what I said. She wasn’t even that hot! Get over it!” Another mocking voice.

“That’s it!” the sound of glass shattering and all hell breaks loose.

MASTERPOST FOR ALL PARTS OF FLUENT FRESHMAN AU

NEXT

[mobfrog]

mob is my favorite character in mp100 bar none and also my favorite character in all media ever, but his arc is so thorough and he ends up in such a good place that i just... don’t feel the need to talk about him that much. teru on the other hand has so many things wrong with him and so little serious attention paid to said things within the confines of the narrative that i feel compelled to trap him in a jar like a bug and put him under a microscope. he says and does the most deranged things and its hilarious and then its like wait a minute you’re 14. why do you know how to torture someone.

[tubbytarchia]

I have a lot of respect towards CC fWhip, I do... but it's increasingly bothering me how kind of. Poorly done SOS was (it's as good as over to me since theres only one official event left and all my guys are dead) and how I would not remember it for anything were it not for the maid trauma and the pillager suicide bombing. It's a cool gimmick that could make for something really neat in concept, I would have really loved to see more tension between people and them trying to earn favor in order to be revived, like the way Jimmy had an entire tierlist for who he would revive based on how they treated him, or the very brief "revival blacklist" that ended up not mattering at all... because 1600% fate coin inflation hit instead in an effort to retain any stakes at all. Anyone who died was just revived by whoever was conveniently nearby with any coins to contribute and the revival cost was just pumped up and up retroactively

The events that I enjoyed the most were the player-run ones too... I'm sorry but pillagers were never ever going to have even a sliver of a chance of winning that last official event with how easy it was for villagers to deduce everything. Again not a jab at CC fWhip cause running an SMP must be maddd work. Just wallowing a bit in the lost potential (but it's super awesome if people still enjoyed the series of course!!! I did too just not as much as I wish I could have)