#thanks for the ask!! hopefully this satisfies some curiosities

[post-it-notes7]

not a particularly clever or witty ask here, but i for one would absolutely love to read some of your incomprehensible paragraphs about star warriors and/or how they do or don't reflect into the mirror world and/or mir falspar's bone to pick, if you ever felt like writing them 👀👀

The rambling continues! Tacking this on as an extensive part two for the previous post, which deals with star warriors and their known traits. Here, I'll dive into the effect of star warriors on the mirrorworld (or lack there of), along with Mir Falspar's choice thoughts regarding the matter.

Essentially, star warrior have zero bearing on the Mirror World. No reflections of this realm were "chosen" by the stars to do anything, as they exist outside of Gamble Galaxy's dimensional plane, and outside of Nightmare's conflict. The stars can't reach them here, and the Dimension Mirror cannot bestow that kind of intangible power in their place*. This is only emphasized by the Mirror World's lack of urgency, it's a stagnant place, with no real driving force of change. Star warriors just aren't necessary.

Moving away from star warriors themselves, Mir Falspar's ill-will towards the matter extends from one significant point, and one alone: his counterpart, Sir Falspar. To really understand why he's so incensed though, we need to take a few steps back, and look at Falspar himself.

Falspar of the lightworld is, of course, a star warrior, and a general of the Galaxy Soldier Army. Falspar is a star warrior, so everything else is secondary. His fate in the lightworld has already been decided, and it says right there in bold that he's meant to fight for the galaxy, up until the bitter end. Falspar, like all star warriors, is supposed to be possessed by this innate instinct, spurred forward with the need to give everything he has no matter what it costs, because his duty is to the stars, and the stars alone.

But Falspar's never been sure he truly wants to give up his life for this cause.

This doesn't mean he won't, but it heavily impacts his approach when tackling a crisis. It's more along the lines of wanting cake and to eat it too. He wants to succeed at defeating Nightmare and he wants to live to see it with all his friends by his side. When something requires a sacrifice, he looks for another way. He bends the rules to protect those he cares about, and to protect himself. He fights against his nature as a star warrior, against something that should not be a choice, and smothers it down to become something else. To define his own path.

Mir Falspar, by contrast, does not believe he can do the same. How is it fair, that his counterpart can defy the stars, can turn on his very nature like that? That his counterpart gets to be a star warrior, in the side of the world where such a thing is honored and necessary, and choose to go against it.

This facet of Sir Falspar is not an obvious thing, you'd be hard-pressed finding anyone who even suspects it. Falspar never verbalizes these kind of thoughts, or anything regarding his doubt about remaining in the GSA. He's a general, he can't do that. He can't bring himself to even confide about that kind of thing to Garlude or Dragato. He just lives with it, beneath everything, and keeps testing the extent of his luck over and over and over again, keeps hoping there will always be another way.

But Mir Falspar is his reverse, and Mir Falspar knows him the way only a reflection knows their counterpart.

Falspar defies his fate in order to live without the key component of sacrifice that being a star warrior demands. Mir Falspar cannot fathom a world where he is not that sacrifice, obligated to trade his life again and again and again so that those who need his protection can live on instead.

To put it short, Mir Falspar despises his counterpart for the failure of a star warrior he is, in his eyes, and by extent the very notion of it. What does the concept of star warriors even matter, then, given all that. Why does it matter if you're "chosen" to be one, if you can just back out and refuse. Why can't Mir Falspar do the same. Falspar is the reason Mir Falspar is too "good" for the standards of the Mirror World, isn't he? He's the reason the mirror saw fit not to give Mir Falspar any choice. The reason he was made this way. The reason he cannot change.

So, why couldn't you have been a bit better, Mir Falspar is plagued with wondering, so that I could have been a bit worse?

*there is one exception to this case.

[lovelynim]

Important data

Wind Break - Sakura x Suo (feat. Nirei)

A/N: Two out of three comms for @wertzunge ~ Again, thank you so much for the support!! It's been a while since I had such a fun dynamic to write (hopefully no one was too ooc, eheh).

Summary: Spotting some blank spaces in Nirei's notebook, Suo decides to give him a little hand and help him find some new data about Sakura

Word count: 2037 words

Sakura sighed, closing his eyes while trying to keep his cool and not say anything that would come out as rude. He was really, really trying this time. It was supposed to be a school trip, after all: no stress, no annoyances, no fights, just a good time and lots of fun. Then… Why the hell was Nirei putting him through such a test?

“So, sweet or sour, Sakura-san?” Nirei continued, a satisfied smile on his face. He was sitting on the bed next to Sakura’s, his legs crossed and his little notebook in one hand while the pencil, held by the other hand, seemed to move restlessly.

Sakura lost count of how many of those questions he answered in a five minute span. He had just got out of the shower and Nirei was already throwing one inquiry after the other. All he wanted right now was for Suo to finish his bath so he could entertain Nirei’s curiosity in his place.

With a defeated sigh, Sakura rolled his eyes as if thinking. “I-I don’t know, sour, I think? No, maybe sweet it’s better, but- agh, whatever! Both,” he groaned, part of him hoping for it to be enough to end Nirei’s questions.

But it wasn’t.

After noting something down in half a second, Nirei already lifted his gaze from his notebook and a satisfied smile rested on his lips. Damn it! “Ok, Sakura-san, would you say you-”

“AHH!!” Sakura groaned - or, maybe, ‘growled’ is a better description - “why are you asking so many questions?” He huffed, a faint rosy hue spreading across his cheeks. The awkward silence that followed only made it worse.

Nirei blinked quietly, as if processing Sakura’s reactions. “Oh, to gather more information about you, Sakura-san,” he nodded promptly, his polite smile already back to his face. “That will help me understand you and- S-Sakura-san? Where are you going?” The boy spoke hurriedly as Sakura walked over the room, picking up his things before heading to his bed.

“I-I’m tired. I want to go to bed early. Good night!” He hissed, the last part even more aggressively than before. Maybe if he pretended to be asleep, Nirei would spare him from the endless interrogation.

“Oh, good night, Sakura-san,” Nirei replied, watching as Sakura turned his back to him and shifted his position a couple times, probably trying to find a comfortable position in his bed.

As Sakura’s pretending went on, the only noise filling their bedroom was the one coming from the shower. But it was replaced soon enough, as Suo finished his bath and walked back into the bedroom. “Ahh, I really needed that after today’s-”

“Shhh!” Nirei interrupted, holding out his finger in front of his slightly-smiling lips. “Sakura-san is sleeping,” he chuckled quietly, pointing over to the other.

Sakura, with his face out of their sight, clenched his teeth. Just ignore them and keep pretending until you’re actually sleeping, he thought to himself.

“Hmm,” Suo tilted his head, placing the towel over his shoulders as he looked over to Sakura, narrowing his eye while inspecting the picture more thoroughly. Sleeping, huh? “Sorry, I didn’t know,” he whispered - or rather spoke in a ‘whispery’ manner -, “I could swear I heard you two talking just now.”

“Sakura-san was helping me fill the notebook with more information about him,” Nirei said while raising the book in his hand, “but he said he was tired and wanted to sleep early.”

‘Yes, and you two should do the same!’, Sakura though, closing his hand into a fist over the sheets. He couldn’t help, however, his curiosity in hearing what Suo and Nirei were going to talk about.

He could hear the shifts in one of the beds, probably a pillow being tossed aside and one of the blankets pushed away. What were they doing?

“Oh, you wrote a lot, Nirei,” Suo praised, leaning over the blonde to get a better look at Sakura’s page in the notebook. “Did Sakura really answer all that?”

“Well, not everything. There are things about him that I notice and decide that they are noteworthy. Or things that happen and I feel that are important enough to register. Things like that,” Nirei flipped across one or two pages, showing examples of what he just said.

On the nearby bed, Sakura couldn’t help but squirm a little, feeling curiosity eating him from inside out. He never bothered himself enough to check more than a couple lines in Nirei’s notebook - and, most of the time, they weren’t even about him. Thinking that Suo and Nirei were discussing him in detail…

That reaction didn't go unnoticed under Suo’s attentive gaze. So far, Suo found it curious how Sakura would decide for the most complex and difficult courses of actions to solve the most simple problems. “So, Nirei,” he muttered, the gears already turning inside his head, “what are those blank spaces?”

Sakura widened his eyes - but, thankfully, they were out of his friends’ sight.

“For things I still need to figure out. Like what Sakura-san’s laughter is like or if he has any notable weakness and-”

“Would you like me to help you figure those out?” Suo interrupted, tilting his head to the side while he looked at Nirei. 

The excitement in the blonde’s face contrasted the fear and worry that took over Sakura’s. Nirei nodded, almost in a hurry, and promptly held up his pencil next to the notebook. “A-are you sure, Suo-san?”

“Mhm!” Suo smiled, looking at Sakura and then back to Nirei. “Since he is asleep, hearing him laugh might be a little difficult… but we can try to look for any weak spots.”

“Got it,” Nirei nodded, watching while his colleague stood up and walked over Sakura’s bed. The quiet, gentle steps sent shivers down Sakura’s body - which he tried his best to conceal - while making him wonder what Suo was plotting this time.

“Sakura-san’s weakness…” Suo spoke gently, sitting himself next to Sakura’s “sleeping” body in his bed. Sakura gulped as he felt the mattress shifting, already bracing himself for the worst. “Oh.”

“S-Suo-san? Did you discover something?”

Suo chuckled, “maybe,” he looked over his shoulder to face Nirei and then back at Sakura - more specifically, at his ear slowly turning red. “Let’s see…”

!!!!

Sakura gritted his teeth, feeling each and every muscle of his body tense to strain any noise from escaping his throat. Meanwhile, Suo gently fluttered his fingers around Sakura’s reddish ear, caressing and stroking the shell and down the lobe. “Sakura-san’s ears always turn so red when he gets shy… could they be a weak spot? What do you think, Nirei?”

Why, why, why, why?!

Why was Suo tickl- torturing him like that?! Sakura’s lips trembled, threatening to curve themselves into a smile while Suo’s finger moved ever so slowly.

“I don’t know, Suo-san,” Nirei answered and lifted his eyes from his notebook, pondering on that question as if it was some deep and serious matter. “If blushing was the deciding topic, then his cheeks would be a weak spot too.”

“Oh, so smart, Nirei-kun ~” Suo said, but refused to stop the ticklish teasing just yet, continuing to gently wiggle his finger around Sakura’s ear. Despite being out of Nirei’s sight, Sakura’s smiling and shudders were as clear as day to Suo, who was, if anything, entertained by his stubbornness. “Let’s see,” Suo cooed, tracing his index down to the side of Sakura’s neck, wiggling it along with his other fingers.

“P-pfft… s-stohohop it…” Sakura whined, scrunching up his shoulder and trying to push Suo’s hand away.

Nirei nearly jumped out of his seat, panic kicking as a thousand thoughts crossed his mind. “S-Suo-san, he is going to wake up!”

“That would mean we found the weak spot, no?” Suo grinned at Nirei, managing to dig his fingers into Sakura’s neck despite his attempts to stop him. “Also, I didn’t know Sakura-san was ticklish… does that count as a weakness?”

“I-I think it does!” Nirei nodded, picking up the pencil and noting the new found information. He couldn’t say he fully agreed with Suo’s straightforward methods, but he also couldn’t question the results it brought. “So… ears and neck are ticklish.”

“I wonder if he is ticklish anywhere else…” Suo commented as his fingers trailed down, trying to sneak under Sakura’s arm, but being pushed away. He chuckled, at the reaction. “I think he is indeed about to wake up, Nirei-kun.”

Sakura huffed, hoping that - this time - he would convince the other two to forget about him. What a sweet mistake. All he could feel was a shift in the mattress before two hands began to knead and tickle his sides, forcing an embarrassingly loud squeal out of him.

“WAHAHAH!! ~ W-whaAHaht are you dohohoing?!!” Sakura laughed, pressing his elbows against his body as much as he could, but it had little-to-no-effect in blocking Suo’s fingers. “G-Gehehet ohohoff!”

“Hold still, Sakura-san,” Suo giggled along, pinching and prodding at whatever spot he could reach. “I’m trying to find your weak spot!”

“Buhuhullshit! AHAHahah, stahAHAhap!!”

While Nirei tried to find a way to sum all that into his notes - both Suo’s tickling skills and Sakura’s ticklish spots - Suo continued to test one spot after the other, swiftly moving around his victim’s body. At some point, he had Sakura’s legs straddled and the last spot he wanted to try at his disposal: his feet.

“H-hah, don’t you- hahh.. dare!” Sakura wheezed, trying to push his body up. He couldn’t see what Suo was doing and that definitely made things worse. “I’m warning you, don’t d-AHAhah!”

“Wow, I think I found it, Nirei-kun,” Suo teased, the corner of his lips curling up while he tickled Sakura’s feet, his right hand targeting the spot under Sakura’s toes while the left one scratched the ball of his foot. “He is laughing the hardest now, no?”

“Mhm,” Nirei commented, not taking the matter as playfully as Suo was. This was important data, after all, “compared to when you tickled his sides, he is also squirming a lot more now.”

“You heard that, Sakura-san?” Suo laughed, not even sure if his voice could make it to Sakura’s ears. “Your feet might be your weak spot!”

“SHUHUHUT UP! AHAHA- lehEHEhet go!!” He cackled while tears of mirth started to hang on his lashes. He banged his fist against the soft mattress and pressed his face into it, nearly laughing like a madman while Suo’s fingers skittered all around his soles. 

No matter if he tried to kick or move his feet in the little room they had, Suo always seemed to find a way to continue tickling him. Gently, then suddenly rougher. Sakura could never grow accustomed to it and, in the end, the only thing that he could think about - besides how bad it tickled - was why Suo was so good at this?!

Well, it didn’t matter. At least, not when Sakura felt like he was about to laugh his life away. “NIREHEHEI! H-HEHEHehehelp mehehe!!” He pleaded, reaching out to the blonde with his trembling hand - using the last bits of his strength in this final attempt of escaping.

Nirei chuckled, but couldn’t deny it was a little scary to imagine himself in Sakura’s face. Suo was scary, after all. “S-Suo-san, I think you should let Sakura-san go now!”

“Is that so?” Suo smiled, quickly pulling his hands away and holding them up in the air. “Did you gather all the data you wanted, Nirei-kun?”

“Yes!” Nirei said, happily looking at all the spaces he managed to fill in his notes with the new information. “Thanks to you, I could note down Sakura-san’s weakness, a couple of weak spots and even write a good description of what his laughter is like!”

“You-” Sakura groaned, slowly getting on his knees on his bed, “you- ahh, will pay… for that!” He threatened, pointing at Nirei and looking at him with bloodlust in his eyes. Well, it made sense, he was the culprit behind this whole thing, after all.

Nirei gulped. “Maybe we should apol- S-Suo-san?!” He widened his eyes as Suo was already nowhere next to him. When did he even leave?! “S-Sakura-san, I-I can explain! Please, wait! There’s no need to get- wAHHAHH!!”

[mcufan72]

Hello everyone. I wish you a Happy New Year and only the best for 2025 🎆🍀🎉

As a little gift, I have two more snippets for you. I hope they're to your liking. Comments, likes, and reblogs are always welcome, and please let me know if you want to be tagged!

The Scars You Can Not See 🌸

Loki x female reader (non canon AU)

Preview here

Unedited, not proofread, out of context... and some sexual tension this time 😏. Enjoy!

Snippet one:

"Bad news?” Loki wanted to know. He tried to hide his curiosity and also his concern. You looked so sad and lost. And no, he definitely shouldn't care about you. He hated you, and you hated him. Irrevocably and to the core.

“Are you eavesdropping on me?” you asked annoyed, turning around and looking at him.

“Surely not. I just came in to get something to drink from the fridge. I just wanted to be polite.” Loki shook his head and rolled his eyes.

“ I don't need your politeness, Laufeyson, thank you. Mind your own business, okay? Where's your chick of the week? Haven't seen her for quite a while. Is she bored of you already?” You asked him provocatively and side-eyed him. You placed your phone on the kitchen counter and walked past him to take your mug from the cupboard. ‘Gosh, why does he always have to smell that good’ you thought. It didn't help to keep on hating him.

“Now you better mind your own business, poison ivy. Don't call her ‘chick’, she was a lovely person,” Loki said. You really pissed him off sometimes.

“Was? So, my assumption is right. Well, I'll get to see you on the hunt again. How lovely!” Your voice dripped with sarcasm, and a devilish smile curled your lips.

“I don't need to hunt, little apple blossom. They all come willingly, and contrary to you, other women appreciate my features and skills," Loki answered, a self-righteous tone in his voice. How much he enjoyed riling you up.

A faked noise of puking left your mouth. He was really so in love with himself and self-confident, wasn't he?

“The only feature they appreciate is the package between your legs and what you're able to do with it. At least I hope you know what to do with it, because many men don't. Are you really that blind, Laufeyson? They're not interested in you or your heart…ohhh…I totally forgot…you don't have one!” You spat, leaning casually against the kitchen counter with your eyes on him, your arms crossed over your chest. You were absolutely aware of how hurtful your words were, but like always, they left your mouth quicker than you could think about it.

“You might not understand it, but I've needs sometimes, and yes, I need them to get satisfied. Maybe you like it, but I don't like to be alone all the time. By the way, don't you have needs? What are you doing with them? Sweat them out?” Loki laughed condescendingly.

“Oh, surely I've needs but I'm not whoring around like you. I want more than just… senseless fucking. I need feelings and a heart as well. And if physical lust gets too much I prefer my battery-provided friend… if you know what I mean. No feelings, no commitment, just satisfaction,” you smirked, raising one eyebrow and licking over your lower lip. How you loved to provoke him. Men were such cavemen and such simple beings.

‘Gosh, this woman’ Loki thought. The liplicking and the imagination of you, smelling lovely like the prettiest spring flower he could think of, and your ‘ battery-provided friend’ made him instantly hard, and he just laughed lightly and shook his head. How much he wanted to fuck you senseless, how much he wanted to kiss you and get a taste of you. Hopefully, you didn't recognise the growing bulge in his sweatpants. Maybe he should fuck you out of his system. Maybe then he could finally stop thinking about you permanently. At the same time he wanted more. More of you, and so much more than just sex. “Ahh, yes and I don't have a heart. Sorry, I forgot about that, grumpy little daisy, ” he countered harshly, tilting his head and grinning sarcastically.

“Finally you got it, and by the way, what benefits do I have from a perfect, beautiful outer shell if there's no heart involved, hm, Laufeyson?” You regretted your words as soon as they had left your mouth, and you swallowed hard. Deep down in your gut, you knew that Loki wasn't the heartless jerk and playboy you'd like to see in him. But you couldn't let him get any closer to your heart and into your life. Not physically, and definitely not emotionally. No, never. He deserved better. He deserved someone better than all those chicks, and he definitely deserves someone better than you. Period. You saw him swallowing hard, and besides recognising something else, you also recognised how much your words had hit him.

“The benefit you could have might be lustful, satisfying sex and several wonderful orgasms. To get that stick out of your pretty ass, you know. I happily offer my services to you, sweet peach flower.” Oops…Did he really just offer himself to you? How pathetic of him, and definitely absolutely inappropriate and presuming. You were an absolutely great woman with class and decency, hard to get, and always keeping him at a distance and rightly so. If you wouldn't already hate him, now you definitely would.

“Besides that, yes, you're absolutely right. My shell doesn't contain a heart. See you later, in the club, my charming prickly cactus”, was the only thing he said, his eyes slightly filled with tears.

For a second, you didn't know what to reply, and you just stood there with your mouth agape. Who did he think he was? Pretty ass? Did you hear him correctly? You didn't have a stick in your ass. Not really. Your stiffness, physically and mentally, was nothing of his concern. If only he knew the reason for that. But he'd never be the one to share this problem with. You had to get along with it, not him. Also, you had to do this alone. And why would he wonder about your orgasms? How dare he! And, was there something growing in his sweatpants? Did you really have that effect on him? Would he really like to spend a night with you? You, the broken soul, the not overly attractive girl with that destroyed heart, and an injured body. He would never like what would lie next to him in his bed. Neither your physicality nor your skills in the bedroom department would live up to his expectations. Why, just… why? You didn't want to like him, you didn't want to want him. And you didn't want him to like or want you either. But maybe, just maybe he was right and all you needed was a good fuck. What's the big deal? Probably it might be a good idea to fuck him out of your system. But then you weren't any better than his party chicks and like them just another notch in his bed post. And for that you weren't desperate enough. You still had some pride. Arghh, this guy drove you crazy. As soon as you found your composure again, you fired the next words at him.

“I'll give that a miss, Laufeyson, thanks! No to all of this. And don't always give me those stupid flower names. Idiot.” you answered coldhearted and snappishly.

You placed your unused mug back in the cupboard, turned around and stormed off the kitchen in frustration. You couldn't stand it anymore. Not today.

‘Will you ever have a nice word for me?’ Loki thought when he saw you storming off. Probably not, but one thing was for sure. With mean, cold words, you were as good as he was. If this didn't go well together, then nothing did.

Snippet two:

“What was I supposed to do, hm?” Loki asked you angrily.

“Leaving me alone? Minding your own business, perhaps? I'm a big girl, I could've handled myself, jerk!” you complained.

“Yes, of course,” he spat ironically. “It has been pretty obvious that you couldn't handle it yourself anymore. This asshole touched you, and you…you…you didn't even notice it!” He sounded angry, disappointed and…Concerned?

“Of course, I noticed it. I…I..” You stammered unsurely but utterly upset.

“No, you did not! You just told me you can't remember what happened last night. So what do you think was I supposed to do? Should I've left you to yourself? Let this guy abuse you and take advantage of your situation? If that's what you want! Okay then, next time I won't help you. I'm going to turn around then, ignore you, and leave you simply to fate! No problem, you stubborn wildflower” Loki said, staring at you with his death stare. If looks could kill.

You stayed silent and swallowed hard, lowering your gaze to the floor. Maybe he was right. Maybe you had underrated last night's situation. But you would never tell him, also that you appreciated his caring side. You didn't deserve his care because you brought last night's situation to yourself. But there was one question that occupied you, and you definitely had to ask him even though you were afraid of his answer.

“Did we…did we have…sex last night? I mean…you and I?” you asked him with a shaky voice. Your head throbbed heavily, your throat was dry like a desert. You felt so embarrassed.

Loki just huffed in annoyance, feeling exhausted by the ongoing arguments. He shook his head in disbelief before he spoke again. “No!” he stated convincingly and seemingly emotionless.

Was there also some disappointment audible? Certainly not, you surely imagined it.

‘You better get a grip again, girl’, you told yourself.

“Why did you bring me here?” You asked him quietly and less upset and wondered which answer he'd give you.

**********************

I hope you liked it and that you would like to read more about my new 'dreamcouple' and their story. I already love them so much🥹

Tags:

@faesimps @gruftiela @foxherder @depressedpolishgirl @some-distant-star @lokisprettygirl @anukulee @sheris532

[tkachukz]

Those Green Eyes - Trevor Zegras

summary: When you feel torn apart after your breakup and find comfort in a green-eyed unknown hockey player

(part 1 of 2 -or 3-)

words: 2,1 K

Your life could come down to a tightrope. 

Fresh from a journalism degree and with an entirely uncertain life ahead of you, without a home, without a job and with your family living in another state, you felt the need to have something stable. Anything.

And that's what Jake, your high school sweetheart, was to you. Until now.

You couldn't hold back the tears when he said right to your face that you'd become routine, you weren't fun anymore, and that he couldn't imagine spending the rest of his life with you, neither another minute.

 You got into the first taxi that had the decency to stop for a disheveled and sobbing girl, asking him to move on to a destination you didn't even know. Getting out of town might be the best thing? But go where? You lived with Jake, meaning you didn't have a home of your own. Your parents were miles away, and you didn't want to look like a failure.

The taxi stopped because of the traffic jam and you looked to the side, facing a huge arena, and a line of cars leaving. Probably this was the only part of Anaheim that would get this busy this late.

“I'll be down, thanks” tired of waiting for the taxi to go and desperate for some space and air, you got out, running through the crowd to the parking lot.

A small bench under a street light was empty and you allowed yourself to cry there.

Jake had been your first everything, the only piece of stability you thought you needed, there for you at all times, and now he was gone, and you were alone. Once again.

Noise of breaking branches caught your attention, but you didn't bother to lift your face, continuing with your head down hugging your knees.

"Are you ok?" a gentle male voice sounded, moving a little closer, stepping in front of the street light.

You gave in to curiosity and lifted your head, bumping into a beautiful pair of green eyes, staring at you with concern.

“I'm fine” your voice came out as a whisper.

He analyzed you for a few more seconds, as if looking for visible injuries, if only he could see your broken heart.

“Well, despite your very convincing answer” he began “I think I'll stay here for a while” he sat down on the bench beside you, keeping a respectable distance.

“I don't need you to stay here.”

“Who said I'm here for you? This is the best place to see stars” he said pointing to the sky, which made you drop a small smile “is it a mini smile I see?”

You turned your face away from the green-eyed boy, pressing your lips together to contain your reluctant smile.

“I'm Trevor, by the way” out of the corner of your eye, you saw the outstretched hand.

With a sigh, you allowed yourself to look at the green-eyed boy, who had an amused smile "I'm Yn" he shook your hand gently.

"Pleased to meet you Yn" he went back to looking at the stars in silence.

After a few minutes, your desperate crying subsided, giving way to small sobs. Trevor remained silent, focused on the immensity of the night, watching you from the corner of his eye without you noticing.

A long sigh left your mouth and you looked up "this really is a great place to see the stars".

Trevor agreed with a smile "you know what's better than seeing stars?"

"What?"

"A hamburger"

You couldn't help but laugh and Trevor felt satisfied seeing that he made you laugh.

"Are you hungry? I know a great place!” he jumped off the bench, looking at you hopefully.

“I just met you Trevor, and you already expect me to get in the car with you?”

“Who said car? The arena has an exceptional burger joint. I swear"

“The arena is closed” you said as if it were obvious, and Trevor smirked.

"There are no doors that hold me, my dear."

*

Ignoring your fear of possible arrest for trespassing and theft, you followed Trevor in a brisk walk to the side door of the arena. As you approached, a large security guard looked at you, and when you were ready to turn around, Trevor spoke confidently.

“She's with me” and like magic, the security guard opened the door.

You kept following the green eyed boy starting to question who he was.

His hair was combed back just below his ear. He had a nice nose, and wore a leather jacket, walking casually with his hands in his pockets.

He led you all the way through the winding interior of the arena, for some reason running away from a few groups of fans that were still around.

“Tandam!” he opened his arms pointing to a small restaurant.

"It's closed??"

His smirk widened, and he continued walking toward the -closed- establishment.

A middle-aged woman was at the register, and her eyes sparkled at his approach.

“Trevor my little one, what are you doing here?? I thought you were gone hours ago!”

He shrugged, leaning against the counter “some unforeseen things happened, I know it's late but, could you make two more hamburgers? My friend is hungry"

He nodded at you, and the woman turned her large eyes to stare at you.

“Hi” you waved shyly, hugging your body without even realizing it.

“But of course!! Two hamburgers coming out. And it was nice meeting you sweetie” that last part was directed at you.

Hundreds of questions raced through your mind in a matter of priority, but you couldn't voice any before the food arrived. Trevor paid for both of them, picking up all the bags and heading in the opposite direction of the door.

"This way."

“But isn’t the exit over there?”

"I know, and that's why we're going this way."

You looked around "Trevor, the arena is about to close, we can't stay here."

The side smile appeared again “trust me, and follow me”.

After some corridors and stairs, he opened the door to a balcony, with privileged seats for ice, television, a pool table and various other things. Trevor grabbed some sodas from the freezer and sat down at the table, taking a desperate bite of his hamburger.

“Sorry, I'm starving. Sit down, Yn, this is great, you won't regret it!”

Your arms were crossed, still trying to understand why you were there and not behind bars for trespassing. Did he own the arena?

Trevor noticed your confusion and let out a small amused smile "You don't watch hockey do you?"

"What does it matter?"

“That's a no, right?”

You nodded impatiently and Trevor chuckled, taking a sip of his soda.

“I play here. I mean, on the hockey team here. This arena is like my second home.”

Your eyes popped out “are you a hockey player? Really?"

“Don't I look like a hockey player?” he had an offended look.

“Well, all the pictures of hockey players I can remember are giant, bald guys with missing teeth. You look like you have all your teeth.”

Trevor's laugh was loud, and he gave you a delighted "well, I guess I can't be offended that you think I'm too cute to play hockey."

Your cheeks flushed with a smile. 

He pointed to the chair across from him and you sat down, feeling your stomach rumble as you opened the burger.

“Best burger in Anaheim yes or of course?”

You nodded, your mouth too full to speak, and he chuckled.

“So, Trevor” you had some soda “hockey player. Why did not you say it before?"

He shrugged “I'm a mystery guy” he leaned back in his chair having already finished his food, while you were halfway done.

“It would have avoided moments of apprehension. I was afraid of being arrested.”

“Why would you be arrested?”

“For invading the arena?” you said it like it was obvious and he laughed.

“I needed to know you weren't going to use me for my money and fame” it was your turn to laugh and he chuckled “hey!”

*

Having finished the hamburgers, you sat down on the chair in the cabin. Most of the stands were dark, but the ice lights alone lit up the entire place. You watched the zamboni clearing the ice, moving from corner to corner, sure of its work.

Your mind clouded and reality came back to you little by little. No home, no Jake, no future. A heavy sigh left your lips and you heard Trevor walk over, taking the chair next to you.

“When I was a kid I had a little dog” he started also staring at the ice “once I was walking him I accidentally released him from the leash. He fled into the middle of the forest and disappeared. I don't think I've ever cried so much. I looked for him day and night for three days until I found him. It's amazing. This story manages to combine one of the saddest moments of my life with one of the happiest.”

“Why are you telling me this?” you broke the silence, not taking your eyes off the green-eyed boy.

Trevor shrugged "I thought if I shared something personal about me, you'd feel free to share what made you so sad."

He stared back at you for milliseconds, but now it was your turn to stare at the ice.

“My boyfriend dumped me” you let out a sad sigh “I know it sounds silly but, I really thought he was the right guy you know? I already had it all planned out. I majored in journalism, him with his company. We would get married in the future, we would have a house, children... is it too much to want that? Jeez, we've been dating for so many years, and overnight he just says he's tired of me?”

Trevor watched you intently, compassion seeping through his body. He tentatively put his hand on your back, afraid to cross a line, but that was the kind of affection you wanted most at that moment.

So you hugged him.

Even a little surprised, Trevor held you tight, bringing you closer. You buried your head in his neck and he continued to gently rub your back.

You lost track of how many minutes passed. Trevor respected your time and all he did was hug you. 

It was disconcerting to remember that you had almost just met him.

You pulled away a little, taking a deep breath wanting the crying to stop. Trevor still kept his hand on your back, and gently wiped away a small tear that was running down your cheek.

“I'm sorry for this. That has to be the last thing you would want to be doing on a day like today.”

“I admit that seeing you cry is really not a nice thing. But, I wouldn't want to be anywhere else but here” he looked at you intensely.

You take a deep breath.

“I think you need to relax,” he said suddenly.

"What?"

"Relax. What are you going to do this weekend?”

You laughed, remembering that you didn't even have a place to spend the night "my schedule of plans is being reworked at the moment".

“I'm going to Florida for All Star Weekend, want to come with me?”

“Oh sure” you laughed but something in his eyes said he was serious “are you serious?”

"Yes. I have a game there, some events, I promise to bring you back safe and sound in three days”.

"I... I can't..."

“What stops you?”

This question made you reflect. 

What held you here? In Anaheim or anywhere? 

Your plans had been crushed with a hammer, what prevented you from crossing the country with a nice -and very handsome- hockey player?

“I accept” the idea began to make sense.

"It is serious??" Trevor jumped up excitedly.

“Sounds like a cool plan” you said smiling.

“No, you're not going to make plans miss” he grabbed your hand, pulling you to your feet “I make the plans, your only mission is to have fun”.

“Ok captain” you said with a genuine smile.

At those words, Trevor's hand on your back tightened. The urge to pull and kiss you was screaming in his head, but the other voice recognized how fragile you were, and he would feel like an asshole if he took advantage of that.

He took his hand from your back, scratching his head sheepishly.

This was not the right time.

But, who knows what such a trip might bring.

 *

 *

 *

Part two comes out by the end of the week!

Thanks for reading!!  :))

I would love to read your comments, suggestions, criticisms, or what you expect from this trip (you can send requests if you want)

[writersdare]

Password Is Your Birthday | Calum Hood

Pairing: Calum Hood x Reader (she/her)

Summary: Y/N never doubted Calum's loyalty, however, once controversial photos were leaked, their relationship was put to the test.

Warning: angsty, mention of alcohol

Word Count: 2 582

Requested: yes

Author’s Note: Thank you for the patience! Lately I've experienced a somewhat burnout, and couldn't write anything normally. That's really frustrating when it happens, so I couldn't post the work earlier – it's really important to me to be sure in a story, to be fully satisfied with the result. Hopefully you'll enjoy this one! Remember, your activity helps so-so much! ♡

There was nothing better than holding his hand in hers. To reflect a smile on his face. To feel the heartbeat of each other every time they were close. 

Sometimes Y/N thought she only imagined him. She created him like a puzzle she used to make in the evenings when was very little. Calum was someone the girl could call perfect. Of course, everyone had their flaws, however, when you loved someone the flaws seemed quite insignificant.

She loved him. He was her second breath, her reason the girl believed in happy endings. It was even funny, amusing and little absurd how two people, who were scared of commitment before, were suddenly searching for love in each other. 

Calum adored her. He enjoyed her bright laugh in late afternoons, when they were watching some silly comedy. Praised Y/N's little sad face each time he’d forget to buy something from their shopping list or finish a pack of crisps that supposed to be for both of them. He was guilty, he knew it. 

But Y/N was guilty, too. For entering his life and turning everything upside down. For not warning that her smile would change everything in him. The musician felt alive next to her, and she knew it. 

"Don’t look at me like this," Y/N chuckled, resting hands on his shoulders. Calum led her in a dance, and even though the room was full of strangers, it felt as if there were just two of them.

"Why so?" Cal giggled back, taking his time to observe the girl’s beautiful eyes. They were shining, and he wanted to believe he was the reason of it. 

"You make me shy," she smiled wider, and Calum only laughed at such confession. He doubted it was the truth, because his Y/N could be naughty, but not shy. Not at such moment at least.

"I make you shy? And that’s it?" he asked, smiling.

Y/N made an innocent face only and shrugged, so Calum couldn’t help himself but leave a kiss on the lips.

"I’m going to get us another drink," he whispered and pulled away gently, when the music ended.

Y/N nodded, following Calum with a gaze. It felt like the smile didn’t leave her face for the whole evening. Perhaps, she needed to be careful with that thought, as the girl was about to receive a message that could change everything she believed in.

Cal just disappeared from the sight, when the girl’s phone vibrated. Y/N lazily took it out of a purse and checked the notification. It was a blank email with a photo attached, nothing else. The girl rolled the eyes and already wanted to push a button "spam", seeing unknown address, as noticed on the picture preview outlines of her boyfriend. Even when the photo downloaded, and the girl could see Cal with someone else, she still thought it was fake, a silly prank. Calum was loyal, and he wouldn’t cheat on her. They were both very open about their relationship, and Y/N never had any doubts about him. The girl didn’t have a good look at the photo, when the phone vibrated again. She sighed  annoyingly and opened another email, where few more photos were included, as well as a link to Google Drive. Curiosity, or maybe already doubts, took over. Y/N looked around and hurried to a more quiet place, away from the guests. She supposed to celebrate Michael’s birthday, like everyone else, but her festive mood disappeared just at the snap of fingers.

The girl seat on a couch and open the link. Surely, she knew it wasn’t safe to open a link from unknown sender, however, it was Google Drive, so the girl doubted it was just spam already. Y/N was too intrigued – and not in a good way, so she took the risk. 

The girl saw few dated folders, the most recent one was created last week. Just like she suspected, there were photos inside – Calum, hanging out with some ginger girl. The stranger was clearly older than Y/N, but looked good, she though. Y/N couldn’t find anything provocative, however, by the look of it, those two clearly had a good time together, laughing and even cuddling each other. 

"Here you are! Are you hiding from someone? I barely found you."

Y/N looked up and saw Calum standing in front of her, holding two cocktails in both hands. The girl didn’t even have powers to give Cal at least a short smile. She stood up and took the glass, placing her phone in his palm. Confused, Cal glanced at the screen.

"What is it?" Y/N, drinking the cocktail through a straw, could see how the boyfriend’s face changed, slowly. "This is… This is not what you think," she almost chocked at such a banal phrase. "Where did you get this? Did you follow me?"

The irritation and panic was written on his face, and Y/N started to feel sick of Cal all of a sudden. The girl took her phone back roughly, fighting with a desire to splash the drink on his face. 

"Y/N…"

"Unknown admire sent it to me," she finally replied, looking at his eyes and still not being able to believe that a person who she trusted the most failed her like that, lied to her. "Why, Calum? You could just tell me if you didn’t feel the same anymore, why to play this game?" the girl couldn’t tell if she was hurt or simply disappointed. Y/N thought they were not just a boyfriend and girlfriend. It always felt like there was something more than that, they were both friends and lovers. A little family in their own world.

"It’s not a game. Look, I didn’t cheat on you."

"Yet?"

Cal sighed heavily and looked up at the ceiling.

"Do we really gotta do this now? Right here, with all your friends around?" he asked, hoping to make her come to the senses, however, those questions made Y/N nothing, but angry. 

"How dare you to ask me this, like it’s not important?"

"Because it’s not!" Calum snapped, leaving his glass on a tray of a passing by waiter, Y/N did the same. "These photos… It’s not… What it is."

"Then what is it? Sneaking out at nights, hugging her? Do I look like an idiot?"

"Look I can’t tell you, but––"

"Unbelievable," Y/N laughed shorty, but she wasn’t really having fun at that moment. The girl headed to the exit of the room, feeling like she couldn’t stay there any longer.

"Please, don’t go," he almost whispered, tiredly, and hurried up to follow her. "Y/N! You can’t just leave, all our friends are here, let’s not do it now."

"I’m sorry, but this is more important to me now. You can stay, as I already understood that seeing someone else isn’t a big deal to you," the girl smirked, calling a taxi.

"I’m not seeing anyone," Calum repeated, even though he knew how it all sounded, when Y/N literally had photos, proving a completely different thing. 

"You keep telling me this, but you don’t explain what it is then," the girl said, grinning sadly. "Before lying you needed to come up with a truthful story, Calum," she smirked and got into a car.

The musician followed her, as he couldn’t just leave the girl like that. Cal had no idea how to explain himself; he was very mad at the person, who leaked those photos. Calum obviously didn’t know that someone was taking pictures of him, otherwise he’d be more careful. However, at that particular moment the guy didn’t care as much about the photos going public, – after all, it was only a matter of time when they’d be all over the Internet – as about his relationship with Y/N. Calum knew he messed up, but it didn’t mean he couldn’t fix it. 

The way home was accompanied by silence. Y/N had a lot to process. She couldn’t forgive him cheating, and even though the answer was obvious, everything wasn’t as simple as the girl hoped. Despite a clear disappointment in their relationship and even some hate towards Cal, she still loved him. Y/N couldn’t imagine her life without him. The girl thought everything was alright between them. Was is it all really a lie? Was it her fault? Why was Cal seeking a company of someone else?..

By the end of the ride she was so tired of her own thoughts that all what Y/N wanted was to go to bed and wake up happy again. The girl knew it was doubtfully possible to hide from the bitter reality, but she was not ready for another drama that evening.

However, when Y/N went to their bedroom, Calum was not planning to leave it like that.

"Just an hour ago you wanted to talk, so let’s talk," he chuckled, watching Y/N taking off her heels and going to bed. "We aren’t going to bed until we talk about it," Cal said though his teeth, feeling a wave of anger spreading all over his body.

"I don’t have powers to talk about it anymore," the girl replied calmly, covering herself with a blanket. "You should be happy, you’ll have more time to come up with an excuse," she smiled sadly.

"Y/N, I didn’t cheat on you. And I’m not seeing anyone but you," Cal said coldly, taking a seat on the edge of their bed, so he could look in the girl’s eyes. "I swear to you. I love you."

"Then who is it?" Y/N echoed. She wanted to believe Calum, she desperately wanted to believe him, but he wasn’t making it particularly easy. "Are you saying those photos were fake? A photoshop? At the days when you were coming home late because you had night photoshoots with a band? You know, I trusted you, I didn’t even have any doubts, didn’t have a thought to call guys and ask if it was true. I trusted you," Y/N repeated. The tears were stuck somewhere, and the eyes were still dry. She felt simply empty.

"The photos are real," Calum admitted, as there was no point to lie anymore. "But those meeting weren’t dates."

"Give me your phone," Y/N whispered, realising the guy didn’t confirm that he had night shooting sessions with the band. Because he didn’t have them, apparently.

"I can’t…" he whispered back, not looking at her anymore.

"Calum," the girl swallowed, staring at Cal, who seemed like a lost kitten. "Give me your phone," her voice trembled, but she insisted.

The guy looked up and slowly took the phone out from a pocket of his jacket. He hesitated, but Y/N snatched it from his palm immediately.

"Why can’t you just believe me?" the musician chuckled sadly, watching her entering the password – it was her birthday. The password on her phone was his birthday, they did it as a joke, but both kept it in the end.

"Would you believe me?" Y/N asked, opening chats and scrolling his messages, trying to find a familiar face. Cal had a weird obsession with having profile pictures for all his contacts. Funny, but the girl even hoped that the contact she was looking for wouldn’t be there or would remain without a picture. However, Y/N didn’t even need to scroll that far to see an image of that ginger girl.

Opening chat, Y/N saw some photos the stranger was sending Calum. They were sketches of a ring. There were different kinds, Cal’s replies were mostly short as "I like the first variant better" and "can we try it with a blue stone?". They discussed time of their meetings, and Cal would apologise they’d have to meet that late again, explaining it with his crazy working schedule and "too smart girlfriend".

"What is it?" Y/N whispered and looked up at Calum. The guy didn’t move from his place and was watching her every move, while she was reading the messages and checking the photos.

"How do you think?" Cal asked, and it was his time to be disappointed. He wanted it to be a surprise. "That girl is a jewellery designer," he took his phone back roughly, switching off the screen. "I couldn’t find anything in stores, so I contacted someone I knew . We met just few times, and only because I needed to see work in progress with my own eyes. It’s not that easy just by a picture or a sketch, you know," the guy sighed and stood up.

"Calum," Y/N sobbed, feeling like an idiot. She was blaming herself at that moment, however, the reaction the girl had before was rather understandable, too; besides, Cal couldn’t normally explain himself. But how could he? Again, he wanted it to be a surprise.

"I’ll sleep in a couch today, I guess," the musician chuckled sadly, putting the phone back to his pocket. Calum was staring at Y/N’s face, knowing that it wasn’t just her fault, but both of them. And that idiot, who leaked the photos at first place.

"Look, I’m sorry, I thought––"

"I know," Cal interrupted. "But next time trust me what I say."

Y/N jumped off the bed and brushed tears from the face, once Calum left the room.

"Trust you?" she outraged, getting mad that the guy behaved that way. Sure, Y/N messed up, too, but she had her reasons. "You’d react completely the same way if you were on my place, Calum!" the girl caught his hand, so Cal turned around. "It’s not fair. I apologised, I know you wanted to make a surprise, and it’s… it’s such a wonderful surprise, but you can’t tell it’s my fault only! I didn’t believe at first, but what could I do?"

"I know," Cal sighed, cooling off rather quickly, and pressed the girl against his body, cuddling Y/N softly. "I’m sorry," he closed the eyes for a moment. "I just got so upset that my surprise was ruined. It was such a long journey, and you found out like that. Accusing me as well," the guy left a short kiss on her soft cheek. "I love you. Y/N. I’d never cheat on you. You do realise I want you to be my wife?" Calum chuckled, and the smile was sincere.

"Now I do," the girl smiled a bit, still feeling a bit sad that she reacted like that and ruined the surprise. "I love you, too, Calum," the girl said and stood on her toes to kiss the musician on his lips.

"Does it mean you’ll marry me?" he asked through the kiss.

"It does," she cuddled Cal’s neck, once he took her on his arms.

"Y/N Hood, sounds good, huh?" The guys touched her nose with his and then laughed all of a sudden.

"Hey, what are you laughing at?"

"I’m just thinking that this could happen only to us, really," Cal sighed, smiling, and kissed Y/N again. "You know, I gotta admit, you’re extremely hot, when you’re angry. Even though you behaved like a brat."

"Uh, only I did?" the girl squinted, so the musician hurried up to apologise with a short kiss on her neck.

Apparently, that evening they both would never forget for several reasons.

taglist: @dgrangaa, @gracieboogirl

– gifs aren’t mine and belong to the rightful owner, found them here @ghost-of-you – 

© writersdare | all rights reserved

All stories are original and written by me. Do not copy, trace and post anywhere without permission and credit. The stories are fictional, they do not correspond to reality and written just for fun ♡

Masterlist | Taglist

[chestcongestion]

Losing Your Grippe- Ch.3: Ha//zbin Ho/tel

I couldn't think of an interlude this time, every chapter feels more fun than the last.

I got to write for some of my favorite characters again in this one- then again, it's so hard to actually pick a concrete favorite in this cast- and this is definitely going to be at least 6 or 7 chapters, which is exciting! Fic is under the cut as always, I hope you guys enjoy!

Word Count: 4,756

After leaving the hotel to go on about his day, Alastor got started with his errands, picking up his outfit for the overlord summit and heading out to Cannibal Town. 

Alastor was quite proud of the outfit he’d arranged for the summit, especially since it was a bit more extravagant than what he’d usually select. He’d selected a dark red suit with a black jacket made of fabric that was decorated with vibrant red stars that covered the black space like glitter. 

Rosie had seen the fabric while out shopping and excitedly proposed that they wear matching outfits to the summit. She had gotten a dress made out of the fabric, while Alastor elected to have his suit jacket and bow tie made from it instead. 

Hopefully their ensembles matched the way Rosie had originally envisioned, if they did, the pair would look absolutely dashing at the summit. 

Alastor stood outside of Rosie’s Emporium, having knocked patiently on the double doors twice. 

‘Maybe she doesn’t like the way her dress looks’ Alastor pondered, ‘Noo, with what she paid for that fabric and how close we are to the summit, if she wasn’t satisfied with her dress, she’d have told me already.’ 

Before Alastor had a chance to continue his train of thought, one of the doors to the emporium swung open, and Alastor was greeted by Rosie’s housekeeper Isaac, who was wearing a blue surgical mask. 

“It’s a pleasure seeing you again, Isaac, quite a pleasure, is Rosie home?” Alastor asked, tilting his head out of curiosity regarding Isaac’s choice of accessory, his left ear twitching. 

Isaac nodded, gesturing for Alastor to come inside and shutting the door behind him, “She’s in the den, she might be sleeping but I heard the television when I walked by, so I assume she’s awake now,” he explained, dusting his hands off on the apron tied around his waist. 

“Thank you,” Alastor replied, parting ways with the cannibal housekeeper and walking briskly towards the beautifully carved archway that led into Rosie’s den, stepping inside. 

Rosie was reclined across her sofa, gently straddling a body-sized pillow underneath her large red and white fleece blanket. Her eyelids were red-rimmed and slightly puffy, with dark circles resting underneath them like exhaustion-induced bruises. 

“Is someone there?” Rosie asked, her voice weak as she struggled to push herself into a seated position, straining her neck in an attempt to look around the room while still halfway lying down. 

Alastor walked around to the other side of the sofa, shooting Rosie a curt wave before sitting on the ottoman storage trunk that stood between the sofa and the coffee table, “It’s only me, my dear, don’t worry,” he said, noticing the exhausted look on Rosie’s face and the splotchy flushed pattern covering her cheeks. 

“Oh… Ih’tshiew! Ih’TsShew!- ‘m sorry- snff!- Hiya, Alastor… it’s nice to see you,” Rosie said, her voice slightly hoarse as she stared up at Alastor with her shimmering black eyes. 

“It’s nice to see you too,” Alastor said, gently moving a piece of Rosie’s hair out of her face, “I came to see if our outfits for the summit came out the way you envisioned… but do you think you’ll still be attending in four days? You don’t look well.” 

Rosie shook her head before letting out a guttural, throaty cough into the back of her wrist, taking a shaky inhale to catch her breath, “Ndo, I don’t feel well either… I called Carmilla to tell her I probably won’t be going… SnFF! I-Ih’TsShIEW! ‘TsSHIEW! ‘TsShhEW!” she said, plucking a tissue out of the box nearby and blowing her “nose” before tossing the soiled tissue into a quickly-overflowing trash can, moaning pitifully. 

“Gesundheit!” Alastor exclaimed, bottling his anguish at the spray that he felt misting his lapel and sleeves, “Do you think there’s a chance that you’ll have recovered in time for the summit?” 

Rosie shook her head, “I felt so lousy yesterday that Isaac took me to the hospital- KHHFF khfff!- sorry… the doctor I saw said I have the flu,” she said, mopping away at the beads of sweat gathering on her forehead with her sleeve, “I’ll be infectious for the next few days, and I’ll feel too lousy to go anywhere for at least another week.” 

“Poor dear, that’s a shame, it’ll be miserable going to the event without you, you know.” Alastor sighed, smoothing out another piece of Rosie’s hair with his fingers.

“I know… SnFF snff!- I’m sorry to cancel on such short notice, I was looking forward to it this time,” Rosie said, frowning as she plucked two tissues out of their box and pressed them against her face, “I-IH’TtShEW! Ih’TsSHIEW! ‘TsSheww! ‘TSshhiew!” 

“Gesundheit!” Alastor exclaimed, reluctantly reaching out to rub Rosie’s back as she sniffled and wiped at her irritated nostrils. 

“Uu ughhh,” Rosie groaned, flopping onto her side and pulling her blankets up to her neck as she shivered, a stray tear leaving her right eye as she clenched her teeth, “Isaaac!” 

In the time it took Alastor to blink, Isaac was in the den, standing behind the arm of the sofa closest to Rosie’s head, flashing an eerily obedient smile. 

“Yes, Ms. Rosie?” 

“Could you grab the heating pad from my closet, please?” Rosie asked, clutching her abdomen under her blankets and writhing slightly, “I’m in too much pain to deal with this hot water bottle.” 

“Of course, I’ll be right back,” Isaac said, rushing upstairs and returning with the aforementioned heating pad, gently tucking it under Rosie’s blankets until it pressed against her pelvis and thighs, and plugging it into the power strip next to the sofa, “Perfect.” 

The heating pad warmed up quickly, and the radiating waves of heat soothed the intense aching of Rosie’s joints and muscles, allowing her to let out a relaxed sigh that devolved into a hoarse cough. 

“This feels great, thank you, Isaac- SnFF!” Rosie muttered drowsily, her eyelids drooping as she yawned. 

“It’s my pleasure, Ms. Rosie,” Isaac replied, gently pressing a hand to Rosie’s forehead and pulling a mercury thermometer out of his pocket, slipping it under her tongue and checking the grandfather clock in the corner of the room until forty-five seconds passed, “103… still high, but stable.” 

Rosie blinked, her face shifting from a pained grimace into a sleepy and relaxed smile, “Mm… mkay,” she yawned, “I’m gonna take a nap.” 

“Excellent idea, I’ll have some tea ready when you wake up,” Isaac replied, dunking a folded cloth into the bowl of ice water sitting on the end table next to the arm of the sofa, wringing the water out and placing the cool damp cloth over Rosie’s eyes, smiling when she sighed with relief. 

“I-Ih’TssSHIEW!- sNff!- G’night Isaac,” Rosie muttered, cuddling up to her pillow, “G’night… Alastor.” 

Isaac chuckled, smoothing out Rosie’s blankets and turning the volume on the television down, “Goodnight, Ms. Rosie,” he said, leaving the room and getting back to tidying around the house. 

Alastor pulled a calling card out of his suit jacket’s left pocket, setting it down on Rosie’s coffee table and petting her shoulder before leaving the den and wandering out of Rosie’s home through the back door. 

Finally back in the open air, Alastor hurriedly dusted himself off, grimacing at the fact that he was once again crawling with germs. 

“E uch, I wish it would rain, rinse the accursed virus right off of me,” Alastor muttered, squirting some of the hand sanitizer he’d received as a gift from Charlie into his hands and massaging it into the skin of his palms and fingers as he began his brisk walk to the Weapons District. 

Arriving at the back door to the Carmine Weapons Factory, Alastor quietly slid the loading dock’s service door up with one hand, ducking underneath it and letting it back down behind him. Going through the factory’s staff and Carmilla’s household staff just to return a book was far too troublesome to be worth the effort. 

Wandering through the halls of Carmilla’s home, Alastor held his breath, remaining silent as he approached a door at the end of the hallway, twisting the knob and slowly pushing the door open to avoid any creaking. 

‘Maybe this is a bit creepier than if I’d just gone through her staff correctly, she isn’t exactly the wisest choice in terms of people to startle,’ Alastor thought to himself as he looked around the neat and tidy space, quickly realizing that he’d chosen the wrong door, “Wrong room,” he mumbled, turning around and shutting the door behind him. 

Curiously twitching his ears, Alastor listened intently until he picked up on the sound of running water and Carmilla’s voice from the other side of the hallway, behind a larger door that was decorated with a black princess water lily. 

“Koff- KHFF- khfff! KHhHFF- IiKxhht’SCHUHH!” 

Alastor’s stomach dropped, he clutched Carmilla’s book in his hands and quietly snuck inside of her bedroom, slipping underneath the closed door by vanishing into a swirling pool of shadows, reappearing fully-formed on the other side of the door. 

“KOFF! KHhHFF! kHFF-Khfff-KHFFF!” 

Alastor winced, chewing on his tongue as he moved to set the book down on Carmilla’s nightstand, when suddenly the sound of running water stopped and footsteps could be heard instead. 

‘Oh dear…’ 

Carmilla’s bathroom door swung open, and an exhausted Carmilla stumbled out in her bath towel and flip-flops, hacking violently into a closed fist, eventually having to brace herself against a wall while she coughed. 

“KHHFF-KHFFF-(gasp!)- KhhFF-koff!-(gasp!)- KHHHFFF-KHFFF Khfff khfff!,” Carmilla struggled, finally scratching the itch in her lungs and getting a chance to catch her breath. Once she’d regained her composure, she looked up and saw Alastor standing in the corner of her bedroom, staring back at her sheepishly. 

Carmilla squealed, grabbing one of her shoes from a rack on the floor and pointing the blade in the Radio Demon’s direction, “What are you doing in here?! Khff-KHfff!- oh for the love of- KHHhFFF-koff-khhff!- fuck- I-ihh’KTsScHHUHH! Ih’KtSschhuhh!” 

Alastor held up both hands and averted his eyes as Carmilla hurriedly tugged on a sports bra, a pair of satin pajamas and her dressing gown, “Put down the pointe shoe, Carmilla, that cough is frightening enough, thank you,” he said, trying not to gag at every chesty, croupy cough. 

Carmilla rolled her eyes, collapsing onto her bed and drying her hair with her towel, “Why are you in my house? Why are you in my bedroom?!” she hissed, folding her towel and spritzing her now-dry hair with a mixture of argan oil and coconut water before massaging it in with her hands. 

“I came to return your book, I’m going to be honest when I heard your…fit, I was prepared to drop off the book and leave, but by the time I came to that conclusion you were already out of the shower,” Alastor explained. 

“How lovely,” Carmilla sighed, shivering a bit as she folded her arms, “Hand me that blanket hanging over the back of that chair, please?” 

Alastor obliged, watching Carmilla wrap the fleece blanket around her shoulders and tuck her legs under her duvet, “I also came to inform you that the princess won’t be able to attend the upcoming summit-” 

“Let mbe guess- SnFF!- she has the flu?” Carmilla inquired, unamused as she grasped around on her nightstand before grabbing a box of tissues, wiping away at her friction-reddened nares as gently as possible to avoid irritating the sensitive skin, “Snff-snff!” 

Alastor nodded solemnly, reaching a hand up to his face to adjust his monocle before panicking and clasping both hands behind his back upon remembering that he’d touched Carmilla’s blanket. 

‘Don’t touch your face, do not touch your face,’ he thought to himself, fiddling with the pockets of his slacks to keep his fingers busy.  

“Tell her not to worry about it, the summit is postponed, at this point there’ll be no one to attend- KHFFF khff!- Rosie has the flu, Vox called to tell me that Velvette has the flu, Zillia has the flu, Zestial has the flu-” Carmilla paused in her rant, her eyes twitching as she pinched at her nostrils, “F-fuck thi-ihh… I-Iih’KTsSCHUHH! IH’PtSsCHUHH! I-Ihh’KtSsshhuh! HIH’KtSschhEW! Uchh…Snff!- and so do I.” 

“How unfortunate… Have you heard from Zestial?” Alastor inquired, raising an eyebrow, “I can’t imagine an illness this aggressive is something he’d handle well at his age.” 

“No- SnFF!- his butler called me while I was in my office… I-Ihh’PtSsChuhh! Ih’PtSsXHuhh!- I could hear him in the background, though… he sounded about as healthy as I do right now,” Carmilla replied, pulling her blanket tighter around her frame. 

Alastor sanitized his hands, feeling his stomach churn, “Goodness, it’s certainly going around,” he said through clenched teeth, “Do you need anything before I leave?” 

Carmilla coughed, rubbing her chest, “Would you be willing to help me braid my hair? I can’t quite get my fingers- Snff snff!- to move the way they need to, and it’s too hot to have my hair in my face,” she requested, pitiful-looking eyes shimmering under the light of her ceiling lamp. 

“Of course,” Alastor said, reaching out and gently pulling Carmilla’s locks into a loose french braid which he secured with a rubber band before draping the braid over her shoulder, “There we are, will that suffice?” 

“That’s great,” Carmilla sighed, “I think I’m going to take a nap now… Khff! KHFF!- Thank you, Alastor… and thank you for returning my book.” 

“My pleasure, Carmilla,” Alastor replied with a warm smile. 

“I hope you don’t catch this- SnFF! SnRKK!... I-IHH’KtSshcHUHh!- it’s awful,” Carmilla said, her voice hoarse as she curled up in bed, cuddling up to one of her pillows as her eyelids drooped. 

“I hope so too,” Alastor sighed, hurriedly waving goodbye and holding his breath as he rushed out of Carmilla’s bedroom door and out of the factory’s rear exit. 

Finally alone, Carmilla snickered to herself, reaching for her television remote that was on her nightstand and turning on the flat screen that sat on the wall opposite her bed. 

“This week’s episode of ‘I Didn’t Fuck Your Husband- YOU Fucked MY Husband!’ is brought to you by VoxTech! Trust us with your Entertainment!” 

“Ohhh yes,” Carmilla cheered softly before blowing her ‘nose’ desperately with a handful of tissues, “it almost makes being sick worth it.” 

Finally in the open, able to breathe the dubiously clean air and free of all of his obligations for the day, Alastor decided to head home, uncertain of how many flu-riddled people he might run into if he tried to stop at a bar for a drink or attempted to go shopping. 

“Better the plague urchins you know than the urchins you don’t, I suppose,” Alastor sighed, walking briskly down the sidewalk when he saw a familiar figure stumbling out of a bar, red-faced and clumsily struggling to stay on his own two feet. 

“You’re not kicking me out- Snf!- I’m kicking you out! I don’t have to take thisss… I’m the king!” 

‘Oh. my. Goodness. This is almost too rich,’ 

Alastor grabbed Lucifer by one of his shirt sleeves, leaning down to meet the king of Hell’s eyes, “Your Majesty, it’s a pleasure, as always,” he said with the widest shit-eating grin imaginable, ruffling Lucifer’s messy hair. 

“Wha? Ohh… it’sss you, I remember you- Snff!- you’re one of my… my daughter’s little friends!” Lucifer giggled, pinching Alastor’s cheek, “The obnoxious one with the yellow enamel that I hate!” 

Alastor almost reflexively shut his mouth to hide his teeth, before remembering that he didn’t necessarily care what the penguin-sized monarch thought of his dental hygiene. 

“W-what’re you doing here? Those assholes at the bar won’t make me a virgin Blue Gin Fizz… sNff! Told me virgin drinkss are for pussies,” Lucifer scoffed, tripping on a gap in the sidewalk panels and falling on his rear, struggling to stand up again afterwards. 

“Mhm, virgin seems wise, considering you’re already drunk,” Alastor scoffed, flicking Lucifer in the center of his face. 

“Wha?! No! I am… I’m… I am not drunk,” Lucifer replied, pouting indignantly, “I wanted… wanted a virgin drink ‘cause I was craving a Blue Fizz but I don’t feel well and I was scared that- Snrk!- having gin would make it worse.” 

Alastor hung onto Lucifer’s words, raising an eyebrow, “Elaborate,” he instructed, noticing that Lucifer’s face was shiny with sweat to accompany the flush rouging his cheeks. 

“M-my throat hurts, and I feel all queasy,” Lucifer rambled, clutching his stomach, “Like I just got off a roller coaster… an’ my back hurts… E-eh’tshhuhw! EH’Tshhhue! E-Eh’Pchhew!” 

Alastor hummed to himself, kneeling down to Lucifer’s level and placing a curious palm against his forehead, “Is this why you’ve been secretive about your comings and goings at the hotel?” he asked, watching as Lucifer nearly dozed off when his burning skin met Alastor’s cool hand. 

“No, I was… I was- Eehh’P-CHEW! Eh’Pchhew!- Uchh… Snrk!- I was looking for a suit to wear to the summit, haven’t cleaned out my closet in years so it took me a while,” Lucifer said, gently nuzzling his face against Alastor’s palm, “Your hand is so cold… ‘s nice.” 

“Interesting,” Alastor scoffed, moving his hand away and reluctantly hoisting Lucifer into his arms, “Well, the summit has been postponed for the time being, so I think I’ll be taking you with me.” 

“Wh-where?” Lucifer asked, coughing into a loose fist and groaning at the throbbing pain in his throat. 

“Back to the hotel, obviously,” Alastor said, “You’re feverish and in no shape to look after yourself… and I doubt stumbling down the sidewalk in broad daylight would be beneficial for your ‘image’.” 

Lucifer briefly considered putting up a fight, but instead opted to give in, resting his head against Alastor’s shoulder and trying not to fall asleep. 

“E-Ehh’PsSshuue! Eh’PpSsCHEW!” 

“Gesundheit,” Alastor said, shoving down his visceral disgust. 

“Thank you… snff!” Lucifer replied, his entire body being overtaken by an aggressive chill as Alastor walked back to the hotel. The overwhelmed and feverish king shivered, chewing on his tongue to keep his teeth from chattering. 

“Are you alright?” Alastor inquired, feeling a bit of pity swirling amidst the fear of germs and contempt, Lucifer was so small, and looked so… delicate in this state, it was strange to observe. 

Lucifer shook his head, “I’m cold,” he complained, rubbing his upper arms in an attempt to warm himself, in spite of his face still being slick with sweat from his fever. 

“Well, your body is so warm that it’s scorching the fabric on my coat,” Alastor said, before quietly taking off his coat and draping it over Lucifer, “Better?” 

“A bit, yeah… ‘m still cold, but this feels nice,” Lucifer mumbled, glancing over at Alastor’s face before wiping away at the trickle of mucus threatening to drip down his face with a tissue from the travel packet tucked away in his back pocket. 

After a brisk ten minute stroll, Alastor walked through the hotel’s front doors, Lucifer still curled up in his arms, silent outside of the occasional hoarse cough or spraying sneeze. 

“I’m back, and I’ve brought back a pleasant surprise,” Alastor announced upon waving hello to Vaggie- who was wrestling with Niffty to keep her away from Husk. 

“What is it?” Vaggie asked, glaring unamused at the bulky item gathered in Alastor’s arms and hidden by his coat. While speaking to Alastor, Vaggie held Niffty up in the air by the back of her dress, akin to the way mother cats correct their kittens by grabbing the scruff of their necks. 

Alastor pulled his coat away, causing Lucifer to whine that his source of extra warmth was gone, “I found this stumbling through the streets downtown in a cold sweat after getting kicked out of a bar,” he said with a smug smile. 

Vaggie let go of Niffty, reaching a hand out to feel Lucifer’s forehead and nearly squeaking in pain when she pulled her hand back and saw singed skin on her fingers, “I thought you were at your house looking for a suit,” she said to Lucifer, visibly puzzled. 

“Looked for it for two days- Ehh’PSschew! Eh’PXxhtiew!- couldn’t find it,” Lucifer mumbled, blinking in an attempt to get his vision to focus, only able to make out the colors and vague shape of Vaggie’s form, but unable to see make a recognizable image out of her face, “You look different, Maggie.” 

“Vaggie,” 

“Oh, oh yeah- yeah… Eh’PXxh-Shhew! Eh’PsSHhuue!- euch… my head hurts,” Lucifer complained, rubbing at his eyes with his palms in an attempt to ease the pounding in his skull. 

“Niffty, go grab some more blankets, pillows, and sheets so Lucifer can join the flu quarantine zone down here, please” Vaggie requested, watching as Niffty hurriedly sprinted away to the linen closet and came back with an armful of materials. 

“Flu? No, nooo way- SnFF! Snff-snff!- I’m fiiine- Khff! KHFF!- I jus’ feel a little sore… and tired… and cold… and my- m-myy-YeEhh’PpSshew! Eh’PChiew!” Lucifer let loose a damp sniffle after his sneezing interrupted his rant, and he shivered, burying his hands under his arms in an attempt to fend off the spine-tingling chill. 

Vaggie didn’t even look up from her position rearranging cushions on one of the loveseats in the parlor, creating another makeshift bed out of the loveseat to the left of the sofa and smoothing out the sheets. “High fever, runny or stuffy nose, cough, chills, muscle aches, fatigue… if that’s not the flu I don’t know what is,” she said. 

Lucifer sighed, snapping his fingers and prompting a wave of light to envelop him, changing his sweat-dampened streetwear into a cozy pair of silk pajamas patterned with blue bubbles and tiny ducks, accompanied by a matching pair of aqua blue fuzzy socks. The garments were nice and warm, as though they were fresh out of the dryer. 

“Awwww, how adorable,” Alastor teased, ruffling Lucifer’s blonde locks again. 

“Shut up!” Lucifer huffed, folding his arms as he slowly let Vaggie guide him to his makeshift bed, tucking him under a soft grey duvet and propping him up using an extra pillow, the comforting environment making him stretch out with a subdued yawn, “Mmm… snFF!- thank you, Vaggie.” 

“Of course, you deserve to feel comfortable while you’re sick,” Vaggie said, smoothing out the duvet and placing a damp cloth onto Lucifer’s forehead, suppressing the urge to gasp when the cool water hissed and steamed upon making contact with the devil’s pale skin, “I have to get some things done and figure out what I’m making for dinner tonight, but before I go, do you need anything?”  

Lucifer sniffled, tugging the blankets further up to his chest, “Could I have a glass of apple juice?” he paused to cough, a dry, hacking cough that sounded like it scraped his throat on the way out, “Sorry…Khff-khff!- I’m thirsty.” 

“Of course, I’ll be right back… you and Charlie both like apple juice, it’s sweet,” Vaggie said, chuckling to herself as she left the room and came back with a glass of ice-cold apple juice, setting it down on the end table next to the loveseat where Lucifer was reclining, “There we go.”  

“Charlie… I miss her,” Lucifer said with a yawn as he took a few sips of his apple juice, “Wonder where she is…E-EHh’PSsCHEW!” 

Alastor laughed, his eyes growing watery as he fought to regain his composure, clasping both hands over his mouth as his ceaseless giggling shook his shoulders. 

“Wha? What’s so funny?!” Lucifer asked, “SnFF- Snff! Uch…” 

“Lucifer, she’s over there,” Vaggie said, snickering alongside Alastor as she gestured to the makeshift two-level sofa bed next to the loveseat. Husk and Charlie were both sleeping in their respective spots on the bed, Charlie occasionally breaking her pattern of congested breathing to cough into her pillow. 

“Charlie!” Lucifer cheered, grinning and struggling in an attempt to sit up straighter so he could reach his arms out, only for Vaggie to press a hand to his chest, shooting him a firm and unamused glare. 

“Shhh,” Vaggie whispered, “You can talk to her later, but right now, they both need to rest without anyone trying to bother them- that includes you, Niffty, get down.” 

“Hmph!” Niffty huffed, rolling her eyes as she dropped to the floor from her spot tip-toeing on the back of the couch, “It’s boring watching them when they aren’t moving.” 

“They’re sick people, not zoo animals, Niffty, cut it out,” Vaggie scolded, grabbing the back of Niffty’s dress and pulling her away from the sofa, “If you’re bored, you can come help me make dinner.” 

“Okay!” Niffty cheered, pleased enough with a distraction from her deep impulsive desire to yank on Husk’s ears or play with Charlie’s hair. 

“I’ll be in the kitchen, feel free to call out if you need anything,” Vaggie said, leaving the room with Niffty gleefully skipping after her. 

Lucifer took another sip of his apple juice and yawned, “I’m so tired… but I can’t get comfortable enough to fall asleep,” he grumbled, folding his arms, “Everything hurts.” 

“I know, it must be so hard to get comfortable,” Alastor said teasingly, walking over to the loveseat and smoothing out Lucifer’s hair before massaging his scalp, causing Lucifer to lean back against his pillows, relaxing with a sigh as the repetitive motion eased his throbbing headache, “Poor thing, there we go… much better.” 

“Mmm… KHFFF- khfff!- you’re making fun of me, but�� mm m, that feels great,” Lucifer croaked out, still trembling a bit from febrile chills. His eyelids drooped as Alastor’s fingers massaged a bit deeper into his skin, gently kneading in little circles. 

Lucifer’s breathing grew softer outside of the occasional cough, and eventually he rolled onto his side, clutching one of the pillows on his makeshift bed and dozing off into a light slumber, snoring in a manner not dissimilar to Husk’s sinuses doing their best impression of a broken chainsaw. 

“There, nice and quiet… to an extent,” Alastor mumbled to himself, his ears twitching at the sound of Husk and Lucifer’s snoring. Finally free from the distraction of caretaking, Alastor shuddered, a chill radiating up his spine when he remembered that he was now completely covered in germs. 

“Euch!” Alastor gagged, reaching into his pocket and squirting a bit of hand sanitizer into his mouth, swishing it around and swallowing it as though he was sampling wine, “forget a shower, I need to cover myself in lye and dry off with a flamethrower.” 

Hurriedly walking out of the parlor and heading upstairs to clean himself off, Alastor paused, gripping the railing of the staircase and questioning what had interrupted his panicked train of thought.

“Hh-Hhnk’KZzhht-shhew!” 

Alastor sniffled, scrubbing his nose with his handkerchief before fanning a hand in front of his face. 

“Hihh…h-hihh! HNK’KXxht-shew! ‘Shhiew! ‘SHHIEW!” 

Alastor blew his nose, feeling the urge to sneeze grow dormant as he folded up his handkerchief and tucked it back into his pocket. 

Returning to his state of panic, Alastor continued on his path up the stairs, now managing two layers of panic at once. 

He swallowed experimentally, then swallowed again. Was his throat sore or did he just need a drink of water? He gently pressed the back of his hand against his neck and cheeks, attempting to gauge whether or not his skin felt warm, only to panic again, hurriedly returning his arms to his sides. 

‘Don’t touch your face, idiot, don’t touch your face. If you aren’t ill already- which you aren’t…definitely not- you don’t want to risk it by rubbing your germy hands on your face’ Alastor thought to himself, his fingers twitching with anticipation as he hurried into his room, shutting the door behind him and anxiously stripping so that he could take a hot shower and spray himself down with disinfectant. 

Suddenly, halfway through undressing, Alastor’s breath began to hitch as he was folding his coat. 

“Hehh…H-hihh! Hhh!-” Alastor’s eyes began to water, and he let out a watery sniffle before pulling his handkerchief out of his coat pocket and pressing it to his nose, “-Hh’KzZhtiew! Hnk’KZzshiew! Hnk’KzZhht-CHEW! ‘sSchiew! ‘SchHIEW!” 

Alastor finished undressing, each article of clothing removed was accompanied by another wet sniffle and occasional sneeze. Finally nude, Alastor swallowed, wincing upon realizing that his throat felt scratchy. 

“Oh… Fuck,” Alastor complained, tugging at a piece of his hair in frustration before shoving his anguish down and turning on his heels to go take his shower. 

He was fine. 

Everything was fine. 

“HNK’KzZhht-CHEW!” 

Sort of. 

[fan-goddess]

it ain't a chance that I am letting this chance go, so if I may... for kinktober, may I ask for alicent hightower x religious? because the religious guilt is hitting me fully ugh.

thank you and have a lovely day!

Authors Note: I myself am not religious, so I may get certain aspects of it wrong. If I do and I offend you, please send me an ask or dm me directly if you’re not comfortable saying so in the comments.

Am I entirely happy? No. Does this have less smut than I would like for a kinktober post? Yes. But I just hope I do my best as this’ll be my first Alicent fic so I hope I do my little angsty closeted lesbian justice

Warnings: Sex, religious guilt, very closeted alicent, reader is female,

Taglist: @valeskafics, @humanpurposes, @watercolorskyy, @sofiyathecunt, @marvelgirl123, @sylasthegrim, @sweettastemakerpenguin, @mochi-rose, @blue-serendipity, @omgbrcat

Ever since you were a young girl, you were always taught in what was right and what was wrong. You were taught that a husband is the only thing you should look for in your life, and that as a woman, it was your responsibility to give him his heirs and to carry on his legacy.

Yet you were a mere girl of ten and three when you began to realise what it was that made you so different from the other ladies.

For years, you had never found yourself interested in the typical lady talk. What man looked most handsome or which knight looked the most dashing in their uniform. For years you wondered if there was something was wrong with you.

Then, you arrived at Kingslanding to work as a handmaiden for the princess, and met the eyes of Alicent Hightower.

She was beautiful, and kind, and showed you how to do the things the other women sneered at you for whenever you tried to ask for help. She became your best friend. But in your head, she became so much more than that.

At the age of ten and four, a mere year after you’d been employed as a maid, you’d begun to hear the gossip of the kitchen staff who talked about how one of the ladies who’d recently been married to some unknown lord, would need to fulfil her own pleasure and seek her own desires. The words had confused you when you first heard them, as all you had been taught about the act of pleasure is that only a man typically was able to achieve it.

Though that next day, when all your chores had been completed, the words of the kitchen staff still echoed around in your mind. They could not be shaken no matter how many topics you tried to distract yourself with. So you went to the library and sought out books that could hopefully satisfy your curiosity.

When you left a couple hours later, your face had turned a light shade of pink, and if the head septa could look inside your head at that moment, you knew she’d condemn you to the deepest depth of the seven hells if she could.

That night, you touched yourself and reached self fulfilment for the first time in your life. Only you didn’t reach it with the thought of any of the knights, nor with any lord. Instead, you only reached it thinking of Alicent Hightower.

Many years had passed since that night, and you’d recreated it many a times since then. Though much to your horror and delight, you’d become much closer to Alicent ever since her marriage to the king. The princess had casted her aside soon after the betrothal was announced, and you made sure you were there to help Alicent pick of the pieces of her broken heart.

There were many a nights when she would come to your chambers straight after the king would summon her to his own, and she’d cry in your arms from sadness and exhaustion.

Every time you would hold her and soothe her with whispers of affirmation and kindness, and by the looks of bashfulness she’d send you every time you did it, you could tell she did not hear them often.

It was one of those nights when Alicent had first kissed you. Her tears had already soaked through the thin and cheap fabric of your nightgown, and you distinctly remember using one of your sleeves to wipe at any that had dripped to her chin.

“There there Alicent it’s okay. I will always be there for you, no matter what, through thick and thin, I will always be by your side. I would never leave you.” You had murmured as you placed a stray hair behind her ear.

She looked at you with hooded eyes, and the next thing you knew you were tasting salt on your lips. Your hands had somehow already knew to delicately hold her head, whilst your lips however were much less knowledgable. They moved clumsily without any real rhythm against Alicents own, and when she pulled to look at you, a mix of apologises and prayers spilled from red swollen lips faster than you could comprehend.

“I-I am so sorry my lady! T-the seven deems though who lay with the same sex as sinners!” Alicent exclaims before she runs from the room, leaving you in shock and slight giddiness from how the events have ultimately played out.

It goes like that for months. You would never kiss Alicent, she only kissed you when the emotions were hitting her all at once. Still, even though she’s the one who always initiates it, the act always brings tears to her eyes and solemn prayers on her lips as she’s the first to stop it.

That night, after another summon to the kings chamber, Alicent walked into your own like clockwork. She embraced you with quiet tears in her eyes, as unlike the first times, her mind has finally become numb with how many times she’s been forced to endure it.

Her body has already provided the king with a son and his wife. Yet she knew she must prepare for another, as her father whispered into her hair whilst she held her screaming daughter, there must be a spare.

Your thumb instinctively went to Alicents face to wipe her eyes of tears, and this time, neither of you knew who began to kiss who.

You expected Alicent to draw away after a few minutes, yet she appeared to continue. Her hands stayed locked in a grip on your body and her lips stayed frantic in their search for your taste.

“Let me feel loved…” She murmured against your lips, so silent you barely heard her.

“Whatever you wish for my love…” You murmured back. It was the first time you called her that out loud. Yet she seemed to show no true reaction to your sudden endearment. Or maybe she wished to ignore it…

You gently direct Alicent to lay on the bed, and slowly bring yourself to lay by her thighs. When you pull the length of her dress up and your hands make it halfway up her soft inner thigh, your eyes make frantic movements to her face, yet when you eventually make eye contact, she merely nods her head and makes a small plea for more.

Your fingers explore her body cautiously, and as you pull down her underclothes, a slight gasp escapes from you before you could stop it. The queen of the seven kingdoms is revealed in-front of you, and when your fingers enter her slowly and you hear slight mewls of pleasure from above, your head begins to dizzy with it all.

One hand thrusts your fingers inside of her whilst the other holds down Alicents hips as she lifts them in her pursuit of this unfamiliar pleasure. Though you cannot help yourself in that moment from kissing the inner skin of her soft thighs as a way to let her know you were here for her.

When your head looks back up, you can see that her lips were trapped in the confinements of her teeth, looking as if they were drawing blood with how hard she bit down. Yet still, small noises escaped that made the area between your thighs ache for something more.

Your eyes flicker between the view of your soaking fingers to her eyes that have now shut tightly. Yet when you feel her clench tightly on your fingers as she presumably peaks, your hands retreat from her warmth, and your greeted with wet fingers you can’t find yourself able to stop from sucking on slightly, the slightly sweet yet also slightly tangy taste of her juices spreading on your tongue whilst you hum slightly in delight.

It’s sad that you can’t savour the moment. As one minute there is silence that consumes the two of you, and the next there is only the sound of frantic movements and rustles as Alicent quickly moves to kneel at the edge of the bed, her eyes clenched shut as her hands lock together in a prayer and her lips begin to repeat that all too familiar prayer you’ve heard so many times before.

You can only look to her in defeat, with exhausted tears building in your eyes, as she now looks to the ceiling and prays for forgiveness for her sins.

Yet you never ask her why she deemed your love such a sin, that she felt the need to indulge in it so much. Even if it seemed to be paining her so.

The reason you never ask you lover why she does this to herself, is because you loved her, and your mother always told you to never ever strike an arguement with the person you loved...

[npdmonoma]

Can "narcissistic abuse" be something we consider outside of people with NPD? I don't believe in PDs at all as someone who's been diagnosed with one, and I'm very anti psychiatry. However mechanisms of what's described as "narcissistic abuse" are real phenomena and I'm wondering if we can address these situations without linking it to a diagnosis or condemning people as permanently and irreparably broken because they're making those choices in one context

Actually read some more posts on your blog and I think I found an answer that satisfies me in this topic ... I think the move forward would be to unlink certain constellations of behavior (gaslighting, DARVO, etc.) From having a PD. Honestly recognizing that someone who abused me was likely struggling with NPD made it easier to find empathy for them but I still had questions in my mind about how to address this specific pattern

I added your second ask here so I can address them both at the same time. Starting with your statement about not believing in personality disorders due to being anti-psychiatry, this is a statement I both do and don't agree with. All mental health diagnoses are created by psychiatrists by observing patterns of behavior that they label as aberrant and give a name to. So in that sense, they're "not real" because NPD isn't some objective observable thing. However, as long as anyone finds value in using that framework to understand themselves and hopefully begin healing, it should continue to exist as a concept. I personally find incredible value in the diagnosis, and have made significant strides toward healing and becoming a better person since I started applying that concept to myself.

That being said, I do believe in psychiatric abolition. What you said about not labeling people as inherently broken is part of my dissatisfaction with the state of mental healthcare. People with personality disorders can heal, even if our disorders never fully leave us. There's also reason to believe that the idea that personality disorders almost never go into full remission is either partially or fully false. Either way, we aren't broken. Or at least, we aren't required to view ourselves as such.

Second, you're absolutely correct that the things that get labeled as "narcissistic abuse" are real phenomena. I have never, and will never, deny that people who call themselves narcissistic abuse survivors have experienced abuse. I honestly believe that they did. However, those phenomena aren't inherently linked to NPD. I have yet to see an example of "narcissistic abuse" that wasn't just a textbook example of (usually emotional) abuse. There is no need to call it narcissistic, you can just call it abuse. That's what it is.

And yes, you're very correct that we need to disconnect patterns of abuse from personality disorders. We shouldn't be linking any mental illness/neurodivergence to abusive behavior. All that does is cause stigma that leads to people being hated for something they can't really control, and something that oftentimes was done to them. I don't deserve to be hated for what my abusers turned me into. No one does.

I'm glad you were able to find understanding and empathy for your abuser, as that seems to have been healing for you. I'm genuinely happy for you. However, the fact that in your case you learned something about your abuser that gave you context for what happened doesn't mean that thing is inherently linked to abuse in general. My father was likely autistic, and I can see how this played into his abuse of me. And yet, I would never say he abused me autistically, because he didn't. He just abused me. There are abusers in every demographic that exists, but that doesn't mean that the entire demographic gets discarded. People who have never abused anyone don't deserve to be called abusers, especially when they're abuse victims themselves.

Thank you for your curiosity and for having an open mind about this. I appreciate you taking the time to think this through, and I'm glad I was able to help in some way. My apologies if I went over something you already figured out for yourself, but I figured it was best to be thorough.

[craneswings]

“ Yuzu! Are you celebrating the Winter Festival? ”  Leif greets the Hoshidan warrior with a casual wave of his hand as he approaches her. When he gets near, he pulls from his belongings a cloth bundle, held together by a tight knot at the top.  “ I made you something for it if you'll take it. ”

Opening the bundle reveals what appear to be little balls of dry, crumbly dough.

“ After we first met, you gave me the impression you value training very much, and with it, the food that goes into your body. Before I met you, I hadn't really considered the importance of such things, but since you cared about your ingredients so much, I thought to look into it... ”

It was hardly a feast or a meal he'd be proud to present to anyone else. Honestly, even in front of Yuzu, he's not sure whether or not he should be proud here either.

“ When I did, I learned about preserving food and how some people ration their options. I got so lost in it, I started only really making meals that way. I want to perfect it. ”  For the sake of those who might not have an abundance of crops, it could help them. That realization had fueled his desire— turned his curiosity on the matter into a passion.  “ I think this batch is pretty good. As thanks for you helping me get on this path, I want you to have some of it!! Hopefully it'll help you too. ”

Though he can't imagine it'd be able to replace her own ration balls, given the degree to which she had been searching for her ingredients from which to make them out of. 

“ If I can learn to make something that can satisfy you too... that's my goal! ” 

She notices a streak of brown from slightly afar before he speaks, though Yuzu still faintly wobbles at the call of her name. “Sir Leif? Aye, that is correct…” she does little more than reciprocate his greeting. Not out of disrespect, but because of her increased focus on whatever Leif holds in his wrapped cloth.

As he continues to stake his role as the explainer, Yuzu accepts to continue her own as the hearer. She hesitates to confess it aloud, but internally she finds relief in how Leif places more emphasis on her training regimen over the actual reason they first met. He must be a good judge of character, or at the very least a trusting one.

Narrowed eyes travel between the chef and his confections as he completes his speech. The lengths he states he went through for this small batch…it sounds nothing less than admirable. But will the same be true for the batch’s own quality?

Yuzu takes one hand and pecks at one of the dough balls, taking little further observation time in favor of immediate consumption. At a time of festivity, rather than work or war, its renourishing ability cannot be concluded…though it tastes pretty fair, if anything. Perhaps even fairer than her own practiced recipe.

Not that she’d admit culinary defeat so easily, mind you.

“Are these still early attempts at rations?” Yuzu fills the silent air once she has finished chewing. There isn’t that great of a surplus of balls, so she only takes a handful of four more and secures them in a pouch. “Keep at it. Satisfying myself is an idealistic goal…yet you should strive to satisfy yourself as well. Of course, I am far from mastering my own kin’s recipe.”

Grainy flavor starts to kick in, forcing a warmer smile from Yuzu. “You have my thanks, Sir Leif. I must ask, however…do festival-goers usually exchange gifts? I fear I am not the most adept at giving…”

She releases a soft sigh as her hand combs through her hair, only to accidentally flick at her bell. Its chime takes her back…how would she gift him?

“It might be - fie, it is far from a proper present, but might we train once more sometime? In advance, with more equal footing, hopefully,” nostalgic smile turns more cocky. “It’s something that would assist a goal of my own.”

[blank-house]

Back at it again! Sorry that you have to put up with me 😵‍💫 But I keep collecting questions... I guess I'm going to become a regular :'))

This is going to sound too much like your typical kpop idol interview lol but does the cast have an ideal type? Or like, something that they look out for or really like when they're meeting someone?

As most of the players I loved the interactions with Cam and I'm sure this is me being delulu (the songs on the playlist... Some of them got me clearly wondering :>) but the reaction at the car when we tell them that they're hot it's completely platonic rightt? That reaction was everything, it was so cute! I get that there's people who like unrequited love trope but I hope they get their own "route" and that was merely a teasing :')

Okay, a dumb question because I think it was kind of foreshadowed in the demo lol Is Percy really the most romantic one? Wild guessing but Elio just seems so sweet to me! Jamie being so guarded too doesn't really help... I mean, who knows right? 👀 Actually doing a most to least about it has to be very subjective, sorry that I'm always going near spoilers 😅

As always, thanks! Seeing such detailed answers for all of the questions really makes my day ❤️

Lmao no need to apologize. I’m happy to keep answering especially since I know know it makes your day. Hopefully others also enjoy learning more about the cast! ^^

But onto the questions!

I’m so sorry but I definitely can’t answer the first one. Good news is that it’s in the extended demo! Bad news, you gotta wait. DJFHRHEHEHRHD it’s literally a focal point in one of the events but I promise to satisfy your curiosity there. 🙏

- - - - -

Regarding the Cameron Q, yeahhhh it’s strictly platonic. Sorry Cameron enjoyers! We did muse over an eventual friend route where you get to romance Cam and Deja, but since we’ve got our hands full with the guys it’s definitely a “after the entire game is finished” idea. But right now, there’s nothing in the works for it. Sorry to break your hearts 🙇

- - - - -

Man, you really like spoilers

Haha I get it— it’s the kind of question I’d wanna ask too but I also gotta keep my lips sealed for this one.

I will say— though Percy is obviously charming, Elio and Jamie wouldn’t give him the title of most romantic easily. They each have their sweet gestures that can be seen as more romantic than the other, so I’ll leave it to the players to decide for themselves. Whenever we get to that part of the game haha

I think I’ve said this before, but I really am stupid excited for when we get to the mushy feelings. There are so many scenarios just sitting on my notes app waiting to be used 😭

~*~*~*~

Sorry that I didn’t really answer your questions this time but I hope you can look forward to when we get to show it in the game!

[nowis-scales]

Hello!! I absolutely adore all your fates headcanons! They’re always perfect for each character, they feel so canon to me 😤 Thank you for sharing :D

Just out of curiosity, do you have any echoes headcanons 👀 There aren't any birthdays in the game so I realized there wasn't an opportunity for your fun character birthday posts, but I figured I'd ask!

Oh my gosh, thank you so much! That’s very kind of you to say!

Hopefully you are able to enjoy some of the Echoes ones I have just as much. As I’m not quite done the game yet, I can’t say that they’re 100% totally and perfectly canon, but nonetheless I hope they satisfy!

Also, quick special thanks to @fayesdiary for agreeing to read these over for me even though I never actually made them do it lol. I still appreciate the willingness!

Now without further ado, the Echoes headcanons:

1. Potentially a pretty popular headcanon but… I definitely feel like Tobin is gay. The only thing is, is that by the start of Echoes, he hadn’t fully come to terms with that yet. Some time around the ages of fourteen to fifteen, he’d probably realized that he was starting to have some… feelings regarding other guys, but repressed it because, well, Gray and Alm both liked girls, and Kliff never really seemed to care. It would be weird for him to be the odd guy out, right? So he told himself he liked girls. As he grew older and began to grow feelings for other men, I think it definitely bloomed into him deciding that okay, he’s bisexual, but he still likes girls, right? Might even like them best, yeah. But by the end of the war, he knows he just can’t keep denying who he is, and finally decides to announce to the world who he is. He’s a little nervous about telling his friends, but they’re very supportive — especially Alm, although he’s a little bit embarrassingly overzealous about it sometimes.

2. When Clive was older and travelling around, he always made a point to bring back souvenirs for Clair. Whenever he got home, she used to always sit down with him and ask for stories about the world that he saw. Of course he’d indulge his beloved little sister, telling her everything he could think of — sometimes even going as far as writing down specific things he thought she’d be interested in while he travelled, so he could tell her later. Then, he’d always end off his stories with the souvenir present just for her. Sometimes it’d be something like a glittery hair pin from a large city, and other times, it would be something as simple as a bag of homemade cookies from a family’s store in a small town. Nonetheless, Clair always loved and treasured them, and looked forward to it every time.

3. Lukas is amazing with little kids. Being a knight, they already tend to flock to him thinking that he’s a cool hero, but his chill demeanour and patience meshes well with them. He’ll listen happily as a little girl tells him stories about the adventures her dolls take, walk with a toddler as they stop to show him every single stick and rock and bug that they find, and he’ll even teach the kids a few basic fighting moves if they ask. I don’t know if I’d say that Lukas is the kind of guy who would necessarily want to have kids, but they do like him and he likes them, so I think it overall just ends up being a very positive, reciprocal relationship.

4. Alm was very prone to getting injured as a child, not because he was clumsy or anything, but because of impulsivity. Gray could say, “Hey, Alm, you should go do this!”, and Alm would just… do it. If he succeeded, it would be funny, but if he didn’t… it often left Gray trying to comfort him while Mycen tended to his wounds. After Alm got stung by an entire nest of bees, eventually Mycen had to lecture the two boys on not doing stuff like that anymore. Occasionally, though, they might still do it — for old time’s sake.

5. If and when Mae and Boey are ever to enter into a drinking contest against each other, there would never be any actual winner. Neither of them would be all that willing to relent until they were like, totally hammered, so they’d just end up having to call a truce. That is, if they even remember that they were having a drinking contest. They could just as easily get so engrossed in having an argument or spirited conversation that they’d forget. Still, no matter what happens, Celica and Genny still have to make sure their stumbling, silly derrières get to bed safely.

6. Faye wasn’t always as intense as she is about Alm in the main game. It got steadily worse over several years. When everyone was little, it just started out as a simple crush. She liked to be around Alm, because he was nice and funny and he always made sure that the other boys included her. However, after the incident with Slayde happened, she became more interested in the idea of Alm as a hero. Soon she fell in love with him as more of an idealized Prince Charming figure, and her obsessiveness towards him just seemed to grow from there. He was perfect in every way and he saved her in her moment of need, and he would always be there if she needed him. Between her original crush being pretty normal and her sense of security now tied to him, she doesn’t quite gather that her actions are kind of creepy.

7. Saber would definitely try to play it off like he’s not, but he’s honestly a little uneasy around wyverns. Something about their beady little eyes… he doesn’t know why, but there’s something about them he doesn’t trust. Not to mention that a mouth full of sharp, scary teeth? No thank you. He’s not afraid to be near one, of course, but he still won’t get really close if he can help it. The wyvern can stay over there and he’ll approach it if he wants to, otherwise, he will not make eye contact. He is also VERY adamant that he is not afraid, to the point of being just a bit overly defensive.

8. Rinea has a really complex relationship with Berkut. Once upon a time, she really was madly in love with his charm and demeanour, but his fascination with war always made her uncomfortable. At first maybe she thought it was a matter of perspectives, and that maybe through discussion, they might be able to achieve better conclusions and solutions. However, as time went on, it became clear that neither of them would change their point of view. War is Berkut’s pride, and the more he immerses himself in it, the less she feels like she can trust him. Every time she tries to tell him how she feels, he shuts her down or ignores her, so she feels like she can’t talk to him about it. It leaves her wondering if she should go through with their engagement after all.

9. Palla, Catria, and Est probably all gave their pegasuses matching nicknames. Think like Tic, Tac, and Toe or Sun, Moon, and Star. Naturally, it was Est’s idea, but her big sisters were happy to indulge her just this once. Like the girls, the pegasi are bonded to one another, so it ended up making sense that their names all match together. The pegasi also have bonds of trust with each different sister. They will obviously prefer theirs, but because of this trust, they will let the other girls ride them if need be. If Palla were to be stranded somewhere without “Sun”, but Catria could get to him, then “Sun” would happily allow her to board so they could handle things. It’s like they’re all family in some way!

10. When Celica and Alm lived together in Ram, they used to have bad pun competitions. Usually at the dinner table. Some of them were really bad. At first they thought that Mycen was just indulging them by not saying anything, letting them have their little moment, but then there was this one night where Alm was stumped on coming up with a retort to something that Celica said… and then, out of the blue, comes the WORST pun you’ve ever heard from Mycen’s mouth. Like the single BIGGEST dad joke. Alm and Celica were shocked into silence for about thirty seconds, until they erupted with laughter. They agreed that nobody else at the table could win that night other than Mycen. They spent the rest of their time together trying to top that one — years later when they’re married, they’re still probably trying.

11. Genny has always been kind of shy, and is grateful that Celica, Mae, and Boey all spend time with her. There was no way she was going to get away from Mae without a little bit of friendship, and of course Celica would want to be kind to her at all times because that’s just Celica, and Boey would feel the need to apologize if Mae ever got overbearing… and then, it was like Genny blinked, and suddenly she had all these friends! She’s still pretty shy around other people — when Celica’s army joins up she mostly hangs around with any of those three people if she can get in there — but she’s definitely pushing herself to do a bit more when it comes to friends. It’ll just take some practice!

12. Leon has superb judgement when it comes to romantic partners. Is it important that your parents approve? Sure. But does your Leon approve? Because if something’s wrong with them, he’s going to be able to tell right away. It’s like his sixth sense. When he initially told Kamui and Valbar of his special talent in the area, they didn’t believe him. Yet, the next time they spent the night in a town during their travels, he identified couples that would break up and who would be the cause. Sure enough, they later left that village only to return later… and quickly discovered that most of the separations had come to pass. Kamui and Valbar were totally floored.

13. Though she insists that she’s never had any lessons, Sonya is quite possibly the best ballroom dancing partner than anyone could ask for. She’s so graceful and gentle, and incredibly patient, that others just can’t help but find her a beautiful presence when watching and a comforting presence when partnered with her. In all truth, it was her sisters who taught her when she was a girl, after reading about romantic tales from storybooks. Dancing alongside them, the two of them guiding her movements so kindly… she tries to do that for other people as well, and give them a dance worth enjoying. After all, the act always fills her with so much warmth. They are some of her most precious memories.

14. Celica is very sentimental, and will keep just about any present she is given. She still has sloppily-made friendship bracelets that Mae made for her, a plush bunny that Faye sewed for her when she was living in Ram, and many of the books that were passed down to her from her teachers at the Novis Monastery where she grew up. Anything you give her she’ll treasure, and it’s very sweet, but it also means she has a hard time getting rid of some things. That flower crown Alm made for her three weeks ago might be wilting and falling apart, but he made it with love! Surely she can’t just throw it away, right? Right? Okay, perhaps it is making a bit of a mess…

15. Mycen, while strict, is the local Grandpapa. He didn’t really ask for it, either, but after settling in Ram, the children seemed to just sort of flock to him as a war hero. It’s how the other kids all ended up befriending Alm, because they were curious about Mycen. He doesn’t mind his status too much when it comes to the kids, but it always feels a bit weird to have the other adult villagers eyeing him in any particular way. He’ll mostly keep his distance from the adults where he can, but he’ll always have time for the kids. Even years into the future after the war is over and they have moved out of the village, he would still welcome them back to see him if they want to come.

[mildcrow]

Dear user mildcrow,

Sometimes I come across your blog and art. You amaze me everytime. The lines are steady but flowy, shapes have form and function, and the feel of it all is unapologetic. Remarkable.

It reminds me of marshmallows, and tea with milk and honey in a spoon. It's a beautiful feeling, and atmosphere.

Everytime you draw a character, you nail it everytime. And I have a request. I don't believe you have such thing as "ugly" drawings, so I ask you.

Could you share some doodles or art you weren't especially proud of? I think it would be a marvelous thing.

Sincerely,

Marcus blood-smith

oh my what a kind thing to say,, you've truly made my day. thank you :')

truthfully i struggle a lot with perfectionism in art. if something doesn't meet my own standards fast enough i become frustrated and usually end up scrapping everything... a habit/mindset im currently still healing from. so a lot of my self-deemed unsightly sketches (especially digital ones) are lost to the void unfortunately.

so instead here's a piece i never liked. it's my first d&d character! i love her to bits, though i never could get her portrait right for some reason (perhaps the rigidity of the pose? the aloof expression? idk). i was really into crosshatching at the time lol.

hopefully this satisfies your curiosity! perhaps ill start making a habit of posting more unrefined drawings hehe

[sixpennydame]

My Beautiful Bestie ❤️❤️❤️

One year of Tumblr!!! Congrats Sailor!!!

And one year of friendship between us too!!! I'm so so glad I met you here, you're a wonderful woman, kind, smart, funny, caring & an amazing writer! You know how much I love to read your works but I say it again! I'm a big fan & I'm waiting for new great stories or chapters of North Star (no pressure though, just showing some appreciation!)

For the writers asks, 🎉 💝 💌 please!

Love you so so much ❤️🌹😘

Val, my Bestie! I vividly remember you being one of the first people to reblog The Better Man and me messaging you to thank you. We've been friends ever since, and I'm so thankful for it. Here's to many more years to come!

It's my one-year Tumblr-versary! Send me a writer's ask!

🎉how often do you celebrate completing & posting a work? how often do you give yourself the credit/validation that you seek from others when you post? (if you don't, you should!)

Hmm...I usually celebrate by closing my computer or iPad, stepping away from social media and taking a long walk. I am very (very) hard on myself, and often think I don't deserve any credit or praise, so doing that is a challenge. But I'm trying to be better!

💝what is a fic that got a different response than you were expecting?

Honestly, I didn't think Make.Believe, would be the hit that it was. (There's that low self esteem talking again.) I had had it in my drafts for months, but decided to publish it on a whim. Part 1 is now at almost 1k notes, which is crazy to me! I am a little sad that Part 2 or 3 didn't do as well, but overall I'm happy with the series.

💌share something with us about an up-and-coming work (WIP) that has you excited!

I'm ever so slowly working on Neon Tears, which is another series I've had in my mind for months. I hope that when this semester finishes I'll be able to focus more on writing. Here's a peek of Reader talking to Hange:

“I um..I’m from Earth.” Their eyes go wide. “Earth? That shithole? I didn’t know there were still settlements there. How did you even earn a ticket to get to Mars?” You open your mouth to reply, but they put their hand out. “Don’t answer that - it’s none of my business.” Obviously your planet of birth has made you intriguing; hopefully intriguing enough that they’ll give you a job. They look you up and down like you were a science experiment. “And why would an Earthling such as yourself want to work here, at Club Azure?” “I’m a hard worker and a quick learner. And I need to make money fast.” “Mmmhmmm..and you can definitely do that here, if the guests like you,” they smile, “and you certainly would be a unique curiosity,” their eyes gleam behind their glasses, “but why do you really want to work here?” There’s a silence as you think about what to say, but decide you might as well tell the truth. “This line of work doesn’t require me to have Mars citizenship papers.” “And there it is,” they nod, seeming satisfied with your honesty. “It’s true, we don’t really care about those things here. In return, we expect our employees to be…discreet about our clientele’s  information and other business that goes on here.” “I can be discreet.” “I believe it.”

[fountainpenguin]

I Just Live here- 130 Prompts.

1, 3, 9

[Current Ask game]

"I Just Live Here" - Read on FNN || Read on AO3

--

1: What inspired you to write the fic this way?

I've had the idea for this 'fic for maybe 4 years; its working title was "House Tours With Plot" (a title I've considered recycling several times, so you might see it again someday). For a couple years I considered writing it as a winter solstice holiday piece, but never got around to it.

Earlier this year, I condensed some stray 'fics into 130 Prompts (after retiring some old Prompts drafts I didn't like). This was one of them, so here it is.

I've been wanting to do a piece about Poof's relationship with the Fairywinkles (since, y'know... shady side of the family), so this was a good icebreaker into showing off his lateral freckles and having a run-in with Westley, (plus the "Am I adopted?" convo).

Also I was surprised that Finley was a breeze to write. He may be a grumpy pixie who can't do magic and just wants to play video games forever, but he's a surprisingly fun narrator. He flows really well and I like him.

3: What's your favorite line of narration?

I really like all of Finley's section in particular, but here are a couple highlights:

- I always laugh when people ask what I want my dream job to be. That's cringe, guys. - They can even handle the dry cleaning. I have to do that crap by hand. Please… No way. - "Where's Dad?" I ask, just to irritate him. Me, Palomar, Jardine, and Commelina are basically the only pixies who can get away with calling H.P. "Dad." He's biased towards two on that list, counting them like his children as if he even bothered to raise them. Jardine just can't be tamed. As for me, it's because I don't give a blazing B about what the head honcho thinks of me, and he knows it. - I already miss Foop. He's a total dip, an absolute mess of a person, but he's also my immediate roommate about 90% of the year. - I hate when my desire for malicious compliance falls prey to the need to suck up for good stuff. I pull out my DS again. H.P.'s eyes linger over me like he's debating whether he can get away with telling me that if I have time to game, I have time to take notes on important warehouse crap. 

He has a strong voice and I love him <3

9: Were there any alternate versions of this fic?

The initial prompt associated with the "I Just Live Here" title was Crocker calling Mark's parents to a parent-teacher conference, and Mark requesting Timmy's help. I think that's a strong premise for a story, but... it never really came to me, and I have too much to write without forcing myself to finish a non-essential piece that doesn't inspire me.

In terms of this story's final plot and what came before, I would have been tempted to include Goldie and/or Sammy Sweetsparkle if the draft hadn't ended up at 17k.

Sammy's a changeling (for Bunsen's family, specifically- idk how many people remember that, but in the Riddleverse, Sammy Sweetsparkle and Bunsen are canonically siblings, based on those episodes where they use the exact same dialogue and I think it's funny). But... didn't really know what to do with it considering I was trying to stay under a certain wordcount per character. Not a lot you can do without Mikey, my beloved.

One day I'll post all the Goodness of Misfit chapters I've been sitting on and everyone will be shocked, including me...

Also, I'd also initially planned for Foop's chapter to include him running an obstacle course, but him talking about the teacups took way longer than I thought, so I left it as it was. Plus, I've done obstacle course stories before and they're rough to convey... More of a good visual gag.

Thanks for asking and hopefully that satisfies your curiosity!

[Current Ask game]

[jedimordsith]

From the Vader’s Kid AU

Luke had changed into sleepwear and was just finishing washing his face when he became aware of other presences in his apartment. One was his father. The other was clouded; unfamiliar and impossible to pin down. 

Tossing the towel on the counter, he headed for the sitting room. 

The red-haired woman from Karrde’s crew was standing in the center of the room. Anakin’s ghostly form floated behind her. 

“I brought you the information,” she said without preamble, holding up a data chip, then setting it on the low table and stepping back away from it. 

“He’s not going to bite you,” Anakin said, exasperated. 

“Don’t you have somewhere to be?” she asked acidly, not looking at him. 

Anakin rolled his eyes and folded his etherial arms across his chest but then disappeared. 

Luke watched the exchange in fascination. 

“It’s not complete,” the woman continued, “but it’s all we have right now.” 

“Thank you.” Luke made no effort to retrieve the chip. “Karrinna, isn’t it?” 

She hesitated. “That’s what my ident-chip says.” She glanced around. “Is your astromech here? The blue-and-white one?” 

Luke blinked. Then he whistled, summoning Artoo out of his shut down cycle. A moment later, the little droid rolled into the room, servos whirring. 

“Artoo, this is Karrinna. She wanted to meet you.” 

Artoo whistled curiously. //How did you enter? The door codes were not entered.//

“I didn’t use the door.”

Luke watched as Karrinna dropped to one knee. 

“May I give you something?” She asked Artoo directly. “I’ll give your master something of value in exchange.” 

Artoo’s electronic eye gleamed greedily as she produced another data ship. He twittered a question at Luke. 

Feeling no danger and rising curiosity of his own, Luke said, “Sure. Go ahead.” 

Artoo rolled forward and opened a slot, allowing the woman to feed him the chip. His servos whirred for a moment before he rolled backward, rocking on his legs. 

“What is it?” Luke asked, startled. 

Artoo cooed. //You should trust Master Luke,// he coaxed. //He does not have any malfunctions like his source provider.//  

Luke watched Karrinna’s expression shift through a series of emotions he couldn’t identify. 

“So I’ve heard,” she said after a moment. “How about we go one step at a time, though, hmm?” 

Artoo twittered a reluctant agreement. The woman stood. 

“There are secret passages,” she told Luke bluntly. “That’s how I got in here. I don’t think there’s anyone else left who knows about them. If you keep that to yourself, I’ll disable the entry to your sister’s apartment. So you don’t have to worry about her kids’ safety.” 

“Will you use them to come see me again?”

“I’d like to.” She glanced at the front door. “Your father tells me I can trust you, but I’m afraid his faith doesn’t extend to your government. Neither does mine.”

“I understand.” At some point he was really going to have to talk to someone about how the anti-smuggler propaganda was costing them intel and allies. “Come back any time. Or can you stay now?” He asked hopefully. 

Karrinna’s eyes unfocused and he realized she was reaching out in the Force. Apparently satisfied with what she found, she nodded. “Yes, but not for too long.” 

[mugunghwc]

from an outside perspective, she was a mere kitten surrounded by wolves—large & ravenous, with an intense desire to sink their teeth into her flesh & strip her from it. out of all of them, neal remained the most daring ; hovering over her with his weight. the smell of alcohol in his breath could be picked from a distance, emanating from his lips every time he spoke. "hey, where are you taking her? thought we could have some fun." his voice resonated through the room, despite it being filled with the chatter of others & the music playing in the background. it was only thanks to norman that he didn't step any closer to where idachi was, currently restraining her. "easy there. the night is young & there are plenty of beautiful women out here." whether they understood each other or not, did not matter. norman was certain that towards the end of the evening, neal would've already found someone to satisfy those needs.

as the two men spoke, idachi dealt with her by grasping her wrist yet again. a tight grip that refused to let go—keeping her hand right at his groin while smirking despite his annoyance towards her.

"keep teasing me like that & i will make you regret those words." she should know better than to taunt him, because it did not matter if she had the skill to fight against him, when all it would take was for him to plant the seed of doubt in endo's head, shattering any trust that the old man may have in her. "isn't that what you're good for? spreading your legs." the blond added while the other two continued to drink.

as rei stepped outside the car, her hand immediately reached out for jiro's own. "it's just for a little while. besides... it might be my last one with them." something that would hopefully would serve as some reassurance towards him, given that she was following his advice by not renewing her contract. her plans for a future regarding a job were unclear, but at the very least, she could say with certainty that she wanted to spend it with him. his wish, was soon becoming hers, as well, despite the fear that remained. as long as she had him by her side, rei felt confident to face any adversity... & that included, the three men standing around li.

as she stepped inside, the greetings began. some, who simply did it out of politeness, while others did so, mostly out of curiosity over the man that she had come with. despite the eyepatch that he wore, the colouration & texture of his scar were hard to miss—drawing unwanted attention from onlookers. some, already knew him by sight from the last time he had showed up at her work, bearing a bouquet of flowers among other gifts. those, had all the intention to approach her & make chit-chat, but upon seeing idachi with li, rei took it upon herself to intrude.

"ah, you look so pretty!" rei gushed & as soon as idachi caught sight of her, he let go of li's hands. his eyes inevitably darting towards jiro. neal appeared excited over seeing her. "there she is! i was getting lonely out here." blaming it on the language barrier, as if that had stopped him before. norman greeted her with a bow, taking note of the man standing behind her. "& who's that?" he asked, with neal being unable to contain himself. "he looks like two face. you know... batman." he added emphasis to that name, as if that alone would help jiro understand what he was talking about. his comment was in very bad taste, but at this point, it was almost to be expected. rei scrunched her nose, before moving closer towards him to hold his arm. "he's my fiancé, actually... & i wanted to steal her for a moment to share the news." with her response, the intention was to put a stop from any of their advances while saving li from them, as well as idachi—who appeared shocked ; his eyes already searching for a ring. his words were mumbled. "you're joking, right?"

About what had they been talking then? The prior gesture still confused her a lot, though she did not dare to ask further, while inwardly noting that Idachi had measured up her chest too at one point.

"So demanding," she huffed quietly, while simply nodding and smiling and only being confused again upon hearing a different name, or did they mean her? Meanwhile his push made the tripping only half accidental at this point, but oh well. For a second, she was even worried that Neal would not react so well, till she heard the word okay in between, and suddenly felt his hand on top of hers. I know how to dab, she thought but made no attempt to flee his hand. Even without alcohol, she was sure that his reaction would not have been much different. Surely a western man can hold his liquor better. Hearing Norman, she looked back for a second, though could only tell that he seemed a bit amused.

Li tensed when she felt his hand there all of sudden. unbelievable, she thought and was surprised at this point, that he would not pull his dick out right now, because that was, what might be going through his mind. She would simply smile, like it was nothing. Idachi's words were unknown to her, though the other's hand distracted her more anyway. How badly she wanted to kick him right into his groin. Turns out that Norman might be more of a gentleman, or something akin to it, better not give him too much credit. "Sorry," she only mumbled again and got up through his help as she took his hand. "Xiao," she corrected him, when he failed her name possibly a second time. He sure remained daring, though Idachi was almost quicker. Who had thought that he would seriously step in after all. "Don't you like sharing me after all?" she teased him, and even leaned closer to her so called boss here. Pressing her hand against his groin which was hidden from the others view, as she stood right in front of him. "Don't try to get too excited, we have guests over."

Jiro did not look overly happy with being here. "Why don't you just skip this stupid party?" One last attempt to save her from the worst, but considering how determined she was, he got out of the car as well. "Not alone then."