#thank you for ending this guy's pain
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AKSJSJHHD;HSJ;SKAOALA???
#my gratsu be as one amv post breached containment and I'm equal parts embarrassed and grateful and horrified#I'll take it as a win......#thank you for ending this guy's pain#sky speaks#be as one amv
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also overdue but i was waiting until i finished but bulk answering some of the asks i got that were too close to the mark for me to answer at the time without spoiling LOL:
CONGRATS YA'LL WERE EITHER RIGHT ON THE MONEY OR SUPER CLOSE YAY 🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉
#do you know how painful it was to get these and not answer them right away#GOOD JOB TEEHEE#also thank you so much for all the love you guys are amazing ;w;#thank you so much ;w;#TNV asks#pastel prattling#The Neon Void#The Neon Void TMNT#TNV TMNT#rottmnt fanfiction#tmnt fanfiction#rise of the teenage mutant ninja turtles#ROTTMNT#save ROTTMNT#TNV Ending Spoilers#TNV ending chapters spoilers
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For @thelunarsystemwrites' superhero au!
guys do you think he plays splatoon
#kickspost#okay but the city bg turned out KINDA GOOD???#was crying about it almost as much as i cried about the jacket erm#yes the shoes are not rendered LOOK AWAY!!!#guys i was in so much pain trying to think up a good color scheme#might tweak this some more#no but fr i was gonna just use the solid/blank bg bc i hated!! drawing the city! didnt rlly put much effort in it and you can tell#but it lacked oomph so i revisited the city attempt and THANK STARS I DID#did you guys know the jacket brainwashed me bc when i worked on the warmers they ended up looking like plastic amen 🙏#also yes thats not a real gun :)#he uses paint!#OKAY OKAY IM DONE (im not pls ask me about him im gripping the bars of my cage)#paperjam#vigilante paperjam#utmv#undertale au#utmv superhero au#papple art#yes the gun is also unrendered do NOT ask
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Might be a hot take as a bkdk and tgck truther here, but I find izuocha endlessly fascinating, beautiful, but also tearfully tragic.
I see their love for each other as something representative of their innocence and naivety when they only knew so little about who they were, and what was to come.
I think the main barrier of their relationship is that its rooted in how they see each other very idealistically, specifically that they're attached to the image of their Best Heroic Selves, and not the deeply selfish, destructive, freaky, and egotistical parts of them. To each other, they need to keep fulfilling that image or else that same person they looked up to would almost die in front of them, and that would be too cruel. Although that hero is still there, that same person they looked up to is not the same now because of...well...everything.
Izuku had barely even talked to girls when he first met her. She was Izuku's first ever real friend (Sorry Kats, everyone and him knows he was terrible), so he saved her in that entrance exam even if it was so dangerous. She gave a new meaning to his derogatory nickname just by being a friend that believed in him. After that, she saved him several more times (Blackwhip and Megaphone are the biggest samples iirc). It makes perfect sense that she is Deku's hero.
Ochako hardly knew what it meant to be a hero when she first got into UA. Just by reaching out to some kid tripping, she made a new friend who would then save her in that exam, then save him again in return. This boy then became someone who was always working so hard to save everyone in trouble, and she realized she wanted to be just like him too. "I want to save people"
But...Deku changes. The weight of One for All is on his shoulders and he needs someone to carry this burden with him. He continues to want to save other people at the expense of himself, still not letting his true selfishness and ego ever show- and it only grows more and more unbearable.
Then...Ochako fell in love with Himiko. Truly, relentlessly, selfishly and devotedly in love with a girl who then dies giving her blood to her- the greatest expression of love Himiko could ever give.
Not that they can't love each other because of this happening (and...so many other things oh god), I'm honestly not sure how to explain it- But them ending up together after losing that innocence and naivety? After Ochako will forever grieve the girl who showed her love in its most beautiful and ugly form? After Izuku changed so fundamentally as a person that the butterflies of a nice girl talking to you doesn't exist anymore? After that simple image of being a hero and being in love has completely changed for them both?
Even so, I believe they still love each other. There is no label I know of that can properly describe them though. They are each other's image of being a hero when it comes to saving people. Aside from Shoto, no one else can grasp the grief of the person you tried to save dying in your hands. They would no doubt try to cope with these losses together, and just try to get better together...but so much has changed. They've changed. The world changed. What are they now? Who are they now?
"What happened...to us?"
#I just think the tragedy of falling out of love for the person who represents who they Used to be is so...so painful#Kacchan isn't even here yet and it's already so complicated.#also. Izch healing together after all this would also be really nice#if u like them ending up together thats also perfectly fine too. im just a bkdk and tgck truther myself. thats kinda my whole thing#but izch forming a deep bond from their experiences and saving eachother#and maybe later on trying to date too...oh boy#and them being able to just...be more casual again. talk abt their lives and dreams together too just so they know they have each other#oh itd be so healing and beautiful#im so glad izuku talked to ochako on that cliff man oh man...#izuocha the underrated tragic love that they could've been if ppl werent so close minded abt them#only the real izch fans understand just how much these two actually mean to each other. god bless yall I swear even if I dont ship ship it#thank u to that person who wrote abt them being characters than run in parallel#that narrative structure for them is permanently in my brain. I love these two so much its no joke#my Extra hot take is that izch wouldve been treated better by the fandom if it was gay.#but we'd still agree on bkdk as the endgame after all that happened. maybe. idk this is a hypothetical.#if you switch ock and kats genders...this wouldve been a very different story and fandom. insane food for thought with this one.#ok thats my yap for the night oh god i have so many feelings about them...#evelynpr bnha#bnha#mha#my hero academia#izuocha#actually confidently putting this tag now. sorry for the angst you guys...and maybe being seen as a traitor#im a strong girl I could take on potential haters hahaha...#izuku midoriya#ochako uraraka
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New OCs
(briefly, humans and supernatural beings have to team up for building better relations with each other and all the supernaturals can shapeshift and take on human appearances but also have their 'original form'.)
OK so I was GOING to draw fanart today - I had a fun idea and everything! But health anxiety (and anti-anxiety meds) wore me out so I kinda .... slogged through OCs as a treat to me. I am going to go to the doctor tomorrow so HOPEFULLY it's all okay.
#my characters#also kite is the worst socially and says things he thinks are surely fitting for a human conversation#but ends up insulting grady with 99% of the comments and that makes grady not fond of him#but then grady is like super pleasant to others and doesnt know how to act around kite and flubs a lot too#its a disaster and the twins are like oh no this is painful#mr tengu that was so tacky you cant say that to a human#mr tengu you cant DO that to a human STOP BEING LIKE THIS#while callum is just like wow this is hilarious thanks for bothering my younger brother its adding character to his life#and kite is stressed because thats the least encouraging thing to hear ever thank you v much hes TRYING to adapt#but also kite isnt his real name and he doesnt know squat about humans BUT he knows they have the internet#and so hes like well the problem is i dont want to actually say my name to you all because what if i am Online (TM)#and so he asks for a new name and then is like he should name me - the tiny one who wants to kick my ass should name me#so grady is like ....... nooooo...... dont............ and then suggests kite bc he's done google research#and kite is a type of bird and according to wikipedia has some familiarity to tengu so therefore yeah#and kite is like !!!!!! DOES HE ! KNOW THINGS ! and happily accepts the slightly researched name while the other humans#are like grady stop that is bullying the poor guy leave him alone pick a normal name!#anyway not drawn yet but there is a human guy partner for the twins and he immediately is like perfect#i know which is which lets go out and explore the human world for your research#and they dont understand how he knows them apart so fast and none of the other humans seem to tell em apart#but then none of the humans are shocked at the guy who knows so the girls are like sir howst do you know#and hes just v casual oh right yeah younger identical twin sisters - i have Practice ! and they are endeared to him haha#anyway if you read all those tags ty#and yes in his tengu form he does actually have the long nose please do not be mad#i just dont draw noses normally and im too tired to practice rn so#i only drew the second one today anyway - the first pic was done a couple days ago but i didnt wanna post on main#but then here i am posting on main#im sorry
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🫵pain and tasty
So you're saying it still is tasty! Don't you worry, I'll cook up something delicious soon >:3
(and bonus little guy)
#WAAHHHHH its me ;---;#omgggg i love it so much -- its been a pleasure to serve you all 😌✨🍽️#i liked the suit and tie and originally wanted to draw little waivydoll ringing a big fancy restaurant table bell#but this pose ended up cuter :3#guys i swear i use a spoon and fork every day of my life i just gave up drawing them asdfsdf#also i gotta practice with mina a bit more and figure her out in my style... i feel like she looks really off still 🤔#thanks again for going through the writing -- it made me so happy you enjoyed! (as well as felt the pain 😅)#milgramblrgram#my art#ask
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Hey @thehomelybadger , thank you for breaking my heart
#the way I picked up my iPad and started drawing angst#caitlyn kiramman#vi arcane#piltover’s finest#caitvi#arcane#fanart#jacketsketch#(this was scheduled before chap 32 came out - I need to sleep so I haven’t read it yet but oh boy)#but I also want to say before I do - thank you.#thank you so much for telling this story. I’m not exaggerating in the slightest when I say it got me through a lot these past few months#it fueled my inspiration it calmed me down on bad days when I was beating myself up with stress it gave me something to grasp onto#I love your characters - every quirk and trait you’ve gave them and this world you’ve fleshed out#I hadn’t seen a second of ice hockey and now I’m looking up reference photos and trying to get the jerseys down#i love these guys and it pains me to be letting them go already - I can’t imagine how it’s like for you - but I’m forever grateful for this#wonderful thing you’ve created out of just the pure love for the characters and for hockey#I went into this thinking ‘hey what a lovely bedtime story’#and I’m heading to its end forever changed and impacted by it for the better#so thank you badger - see you when I read the next chap
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the other side of someday [complete]
When the Yellowjackets’ plane crashes in the Wilderness, they aren’t the first. Another team has already been here. Other girls have already died here.
As Taissa discovers when she awakens with a long-dead goalie sharing her body, dead doesn’t mean gone.
chapter 1/4 - head
chapter 2/4 - hands
chapter 3/4 - hips
chapter 4/4 - heart
M; 49k words
A blink of the eye, and graduation is here again. She’s packing up her dorm for the last time, smiling gently—if a bit awkwardly—at half-remembered girls who try to catch her eye down at the local watering hole. Her parents are embracing her, excited beyond words for the progress their daughter has achieved in only a few years. “Just think,” says Van lightly, “four years ago, your plane fell out of the sky. And now you’re Columbia-bound. You should take your story on the road, use it to spread hope across the nation.” Taissa very subtly flips her off in the reflection of her drink. Van beams. “Seriously, dude. Proud of you.”
#fanfiction#yellowjackets#yj fic#yellowjackets fanfic#taivan#taissa turner#van palmer#in all its glory: a completed rom-com full of dark turns and delightful banter#in all seriousness thank you for reading this one. it's weird. it's weird and it's fun and it's DARK in places and i'm proud of it#that said: please tread carefully with the final chapter. it's noted at the beginning but bears repeating#there are references to suicide in this guy. depression and melancholy and repression are scattered throughout#van's journey has some especially rough turns so check in with yourself and make sure you're good to follow it to the end#(does have a happy ending of course but even so. i know that isn't always easy to read)#as with life i hope the good outweighs the pain. enjoy!
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The first 2 chapters of WHITE DAYS, the sequel to WHITE NIGHTS, are up on ao3!
“How did you find me?” breathes Porsche. Hollow he sounds. Thin. Yet he gathers the sunlight to him as he stands there. And his voice still has the old resonance, its pure undertone of pain. “Do you really think there’s a place in this world where I wouldn’t find you?” [Or: Porsche hasn’t seen Kinn since he left the mafia world nine years ago. But when Kinn suddenly arrives at his beach bar on the coast of the San Jorge Gulf, they must relearn how to navigate each other again, as well as the inimitable questions of life, love, and death.]
[ Read here ]
#surprise !!#to all the fans of white nights i bring you the sequel#the journey continues...does the pain end? does the sex return? will they have their happy ending? find out....#to all the readers of white nights this is for you#i love you i thank you i love you#pls give love to the sequel guys its my baby#we shifting the noir theme to a beach setting#going back to my roots#tune in to the upcoming chapters y'all! idk how many there will be lol#kinnporsche#white days#white nights#white nights sequel#perfumes ao3#my fics#kp fics#kpts fics#kinn x porsche#kinnporsche fics#mileapo#mine
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#putting this here because i need to put these thoughts into words -#so many of my joints and limbs hurt all the time and its always the most bastardly combinations too#it's been only getting worse ever since it started a decade ago#and i feel like i am going insane#my limbs sometimes feel like they are on fire and i can't do anything about it#recently my knees have been worse than ever before and i feel held hostage by my own damn body#i always feel like people are let down by me when my body forces me to do/not do certain things#and it makes me feel so bad to talk about my pain with anyone around me#i've been chasing an answer with so many different doctors but it is so hard to not just get dismissed as a crazy 24yo woman#and end up with zero help#and this is not even counting the very possible allodynia in my hands -#im just so tired of pain and people around me getting mad at me for being in said pain#or not even MAD. they get so disappointed.#i dont know where else to put this right now and you guys are always lovely to me#so if any of you read this - i wish you nothing but good things. make sure to drink some water ♥#also side note: thank you all who read the new OKR part. it means the world.#lila post
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would it be okay if u told me why u like aoki😭/gen😭😭😭😭BEEN TRYNA LIKE HIM FOR SO LONG I JUST CANTT but i love ur art so much so i still consume it otherwise lol
i liked tohru adachi in high school and tbh i think that alone is enough of an explanation for why i ended up liking aoki
#snap chats#haha see i told you last post's tags were relevant#anyway vLKVJEVLKAEJVLKJ IM CRYING ANON youre so funny. this is the funniest ask i coulda got thank you so much#i dont know why i like him either <- yes i do#fine lets get Real Talk about it#well first off all i thought he looked hot rolling out the elevator and i was playing the eng dub and i think his voice sounds hot there#and thats like. not athing that happens to me ever <- literally thought sawashiro was hot two frames into the game but anyway#i like politician characters. or characters that are in a position of power ESPECIALLY if they have to act like they dont suck balls#like i very much love the idea of the power of charisma and that type of thing not to mention the 'strategizing' as aoki puts it#that comes with politics. LIKE HE SUCKS DONT GET IT TWISTED HE SUCKS BUT //shrug emoji//#like its why i love the mine rggo stories i like seeing mine's thought process and how he uses his intelligence#smart's sexy to me idk what to tell you but moving on#its fun watching him lose his cool too ESP IN HIS FIGHT LMAO HE STOMPIN HIS FOOT LIKE A TODDLER SHUT UP#i also really love the arakawa family in general and thinking of aoki's relationship with each of them makes my brain explode#especially him and sawashiro that shit is painful to watch and i love it so much#i also thought him going from goth to republican was the funniest shit in the world like i howled at that AND i was distraught#aokis so interesting to me from the notion that he IS loved by his family but he has so much hatred for himself it eats him up#and as a result he cant be happy no matter what he does- how hes constantly seeking validation even if it's nothing meaningful#his lil. Dog-Eat-Dog world world belief to ichi also appealed to my edgy depressed high schooler brain. sorry.#his speech at the lockers also got to me. unfortunately. sorry everyone i empathized too hard it got too real it wasnt funny anymore#like as much as i complain bout the very end the ending is what solidified me liking aoki if not also cause of ichi's impact in those scene#plus... analyzing him and the environment around him is so much fun too....#idk reasons for why i like aoki also boil down to personal reasons. he still sucks tho so i cant be upset when people hate him LOL#i probably have more reasons or could elaborate more i love rambling but i mean. who really wants to read all that 💀💀#maybe for a character that WASNT the worst but. aoki is so LMAO#thank you for loving my art regardless :) im sorry i have to be attached to the worst guys ever
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Twitter is literally just… Liveleak/ rotten.com all over again. You cannot go on there even casually without running into fucking assault shit, animal abuse (a few zoo clips just went viral within the last two days……….. TWO had been rec to me because of twitters atrocious algorithm that just puts literally anything on your feed. I don’t really go on my feed like that anyway so I miss out on most stuff. I scrolled by so fast🗿), child abuse, hardcore gore/murders, and accidents, literally anything, man.
#there is something to be said about moderation and censorship but man the same ppl who cry about their right to be able to view gore#because “’it’s real’ (really because they enjoy it. I can’t be bullshitted)#be the main ones complaining about lgbt ppl ‘forcing an agenda’#there was this popular channel I’d check out sometimes but he always gave me strange vibes#like alt right leaning but never vocal enough on his own opinions to outright say how he really feels#but this guy really pulled a ‘thank you for those who’ve been fighting the good fight’#at the end of a video where he talked about a tranwoman castrating herself alluding to it being ‘mental illness’#but in other videos of his he’d go on whole tangents about how nothing even the worst things ever should never be censored just because#‘some people are sensitive’ like oh brother go to hell#rambling#people like this have strong opinions on the way that others chose to identify and live but when they are hurt and are suffering#these are the first clowns to rush to make content about their pain
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Fandom: Gravity Falls
Relationship: Bill Cipher/Ford Pines
Rating: Explicit
Word Count: 14,000
Summary: Ford hated to say he was struggling to keep up the pace on the portal, but he was. Between working himself to exhaustion and reckoning with unresolved post-karaoke night feelings, how could anyone expect him to focus on writing equations? Noticing his distraction, his enigmatic muse offers to help him out, but Bill only does favors for humans if he knows he’s going to get something out of it as well.
Or: Ford wants to be studied like a scientific experiment, Bill wants to be worshipped like a god.
Main Tags: Triangle Bill Cipher, Pre-Portal Incident (Gravity Falls), Blow Jobs, Dream Sex, Praise Kink, Consensual Possession, Masturbation, Anal Fingering, Mirror Sex, Overstimulation, Forced Orgasm, Multiple Orgasms, Degradation, Possessive Behavior, Religious Imagery & Symbolism, Psychological Smut, Manipulative Bill Cipher
#gravity falls#billford#billford fic#billford fanfic#bill cipher#ford pines#stanford pines#ao3#bill cipher/ford pines#you guys voted so here it is. link form!#i fell behind on my college coursework for this fic. please clap#really hope i formatted this optimally#it’s honestly for the best that y’all voted for it to be posted this way bc i have no idea how i would’ve put bill’s symbols in tumblr text#it literally took me hours to figure out how to get them to show up correctly on ao3. i do not need to do all that again man#i was really satisfied when this fic ended up being exactly 14k words. like when the gas pump stops right on the dollar#also realizing just how much i yap. half of my fic tags are yapping and my author’s notes are long as hell. and now i’m doin it here too#what can i say? i like to hear myself talk. ford and i are alike in this way except instead of science i yap about weird demon sex#having to whittle down my listed tags here to just the main ones was painful. like noooo the story relevant extremely long winded tags!!!#i think they also give you an idea of my general tone. you get a taste of my dumb humor before you get into it#if you read down this far ily 💋 thanks for being an active listener#my fics
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“it must be so nice being tall you can do so much” no one will ever hold you like you hold them and even at your smallest you were treated like you were bigger and more capable than anyone else
#sometimes i think maybe if i was a foot shorter people would see me as pathetic and weak and in need of care and comfort#and not just see this giant guy who is able to overwork himself and ignore constant pain until i end up in the er#its not like a geight discrimination thing but yknow it fucking sucks#ive noticed all my male friends who havevthe same attitude i do go through the same shit i do need comfort need help etc all under#5’7 and suddenly youre a poor little meow meow and people empathize with you#but if youre bigger people just assume you can handle more. well that means more of me can hurt too thanks#tbf though i know i personally carry myself this way as a very capable and impervious person and only recently have i really been able to#put my childhood and adolescene into a comtext where i can see just how stressful and chaotic all of it was#so if i seem like im fine or even comfortable in the midst of chaos or under circumstances any other person would be severely impacted by#yeah i could use love and support and comfort the way its offered to people who are seen as vulnerable#im still struggling severely every single day and have been for years now but im obviously going to use the survival skill of seeming fine#like i have my entire life
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YURI. YURI
YOUR TAGS ARE KILLING ME MAN AUGH
Like I’m just sitting here getting smacked in the face over and over by your compliments on my art aughhh you can’t do this to me /pos/pos/pos
Thank you so much dude wawawa
dude trust me when i say i legitimately feel insulted whenever i see my favorite artists get lower than 60 notes on their works like!!! you're KIDDING ME guys how can you just bypass that and not reblog it??? COWARDS<33333
#ask#((my pen's recharging so silly mouse doodles is all you get but they conveyed the energy well enough LOL))#i swear half of my tags are fueled by spite and rage#REBLOG ART GUYS PLEASE#the only times i'm like understanding is when you literally didn't see it on your dash cause i follow. SO many people so i miss stuff a lot#so i relate! but come ON#it brings me visceral pain when i see how much effort it took to make the same pieces that barely get any commentary like GOSH#am i going on a slight tangent? kinda but please don't thank me it's my pleasure<3333#and i know how demotivating it feels to barely have reblogs that aren't your own so you bet i'm slapping you with my compliments!!!!#you better catch these hands when they come at your art istg i'll end up plastering a smile on your face permanently hhh >:Dc <33333
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Guess who finally got the next out :^D. Uh, sorry it took so long. I felt bad that it was taking so long and I ended up taking a break from it because of that and then I realized you guys have been waiting forever so I rushed the ending- sorry you had to wait so long for something that isn't even long. Also I promised I'd tag @justaduckarts and @total-fandom-tr45h for this so yeah. These are the people who inspired me to write this, you guys should check them out, they're really cool. Okay, so finally, here it is.
Fish Tales chapter 2
It's been a while now, you've stayed on this ship the whole time. Your tail is fully healed now (sadly it still has some scars), and it didn't even take as long as it normally does. Though that's probably because of whatever Solaris and Lucien said they were using. Magol, was it? No, that doesn't feel right.
It's morning, you're out on the dock looking at the sky as the sun rises, coloring the sky in beautiful yellows and oranges and reds and blues that reflect on the sea. It's an amazing view. You never really saw sunrises or sunsets before you were on this ship.
Solaris comes up behind you and hugs you. "Goooood morning sunshine!" He's taken a liking to calling you 'sunshine' the same way Lucien calls you 'starfish'. You look at him and smile. "Morning Solar." Lucien comes with breakfast and sets it down on the table. "Good morning starfish." "Morning Lucien."
The morning goes by like all the others, you eat breakfast, talk about random things, and occasionally Solaris or Lucien 'accidentally' brush their hand against yours. It gives you a weird feeling in your stomach, you don't know what it is.
Solaris and Lucien check your tail before any work can get done on the ship, that's usually how they decide which places you can and can't go to depending on whether it can hurt your scars. "Well, would you look at that! Looks like your tail is fully healed!" Solaris' voice is as cheery as usual. He keeps his hand on your tail and Lucien sits next to you, putting his arm around your shoulder.
You look at your tail and at the sea, then back at the boys. "Does mean I can left now?" The boys' smile faded in an instant.
"You're not leaving." Lucien sighed. "Why no?" You raise an eyebrow at him. Lucien pulled you a little closer. "Because I don't want you to." "Lucien!" And then Solaris started scolding him again.
Solaris sighs and turns to you. "He's right though, you can't leave... rrright noww." He adds that last part looking to the side, like a child who's been caught doing something but still tries to deny it.
"Why no?" You ask again. He looks up, seemingly making excuses in his head. "W-Well… Oh! There's a storm coming! A very bad one too, so it would be safer for you to stay here on the ship. If you go now, it would be very dangerous for you all alone in the sea!" He nods with his hands on his hips, as if confirming his own words.
Luckily, you have a valid argument against that. "Wrong." Solaris furrows his brows, his confusion is written all over his face. Lucien still holds you close, as if you would run off as soon as he let's go. His arms are now wrapped around your waist.
"Sea is my home. I lived through many storms before, I'm okay. Storm can break this ship, that danger." You say in a matter-of-fact manner. Solaris' confidence visibly deflates, he turns away and crosses his arms. "You know what, I'm going back to steering before we all crash and die." And just like that, he leaves for the wheelhouse.
You look at Lucien, though you have to lean back so your faces don't touch. "Let me go?" He looks at you for a couple of seconds before deciding to do the exact opposite and hold you closer. "Nah."
That day went by just like the first day you were here, you were under supervision the whole time. There was no way you could escape during the day. Guess you'll just have to try at night.
In the middle of the day, Solaris took you up to the wheelhouse with him as Lucien was going to take a nap (again). He isn't mad or even annoyed with you, that definitely surprised you. You thought he ran off earlier because he was upset you wanted to leave.
"Sorry I left so suddenly earlier, I had to take a breather after that." Ah, so he was upset you wanted to leave. His voice is so soft and gentle though, it almost made you want to stay. Almost. "Please don't leave… Not right now. I-It's too dangerous out there right now, we're getting closer to the storm and-"
"I survive storm." You're not going to repeat the conversation, maybe argument, from earlier, are you? Solaris sighs. "I know… Lucien and I both know you'll most likely survive the storm. But even if you do, you might end up hurt again, and I hate the thought of you being hurt like you were when we found you..."
He wasn't even looking at you, he kept his eyes out to the sea. You knew he didn't need to look in order to keep the ship going in the right direction, he always looked at you while steering. But now he wasn't.
Why... Why does it hurt?
…
You sit there in silence as Solaris steers. He quietly sighs, you don't think you were supposed to hear it, but with how silent it is, it was clear as day.
It stayed that way until Solaris eventually started talking about where they're going. They're visiting someone. "Who?" You tilt your head slightly to the side. Solaris looks at you with that soft smile of his that you've been growing fond of. "Someone very special to us."
You cross your arms. "No answer to question." He looked amused by your reaction. "Don't worry, you'll get a proper introduction when we get there."
From then, you and Solaris talked about things. Nothing in particular, just things. Eventually, Solaris started asking you questions. "Sunshine, how's the chest? Is it too small? Is it giving you splinters?" You raised an eyebrow at that, but he didn't seem to notice. "Chest a little small, but can still fit in good." He smiled. "That's good. When we stop Lucien can get you a bigger chest."
You wanted to ask why Lucien would buy you a bigger chest, but before you could, he asked another question. "Do you like the food here? I know it's mostly fish but you're probably used to that, right?" You nod. "Yes, good food. I eat all the time."
"Is there anything that makes you uncomfortable here?" You could see a glint of worry in his eyes, though he tried to hide it with his smile. "...No water." He turned to you with confusion evident on his face. "Well, what do we do?"
That's when things clicked.
He was trying to fix things and make you more comfortable on the ship so you would stay.
…
"Don't know." You shrug and turn forward to the sea, feeling guilty for wanting to leave now. He sighed and looked forward as well.
You didn't want to hurt them, but you weren't sure whether you wanted to stay on this ship forever. You're a mer, you weren't built for life outside of water. But yet here you were, living out of the water for most of the days.
But you wanted to go back in the sea, you knew you did, so you made up your mind.
You're going to escape tonight.
Or at least that's what you thought. Yeah, turns out life had other plans.
You looked around, the boys was nowhere to be seen, they were probably resting inside their bedroom. You couldn't hear them though, which was weird because they were always talking before switching with each other. But you pushed that thought to the side as you only had one goal in mind.
Escape the ship.
You quickly made you way to the edge of the dock and pulled yourself up, looking down to the sea of freedom just below you. You wasted no time. You leaned forward with hopes that you wouldn't hit your head on the side of the ship as you fell down, but something grabbed your waist before you could feel yourself falling, gasping as it pulled you back.
"And just what do you think you're doing?" Lucien's deep voice sounded from behind you. He pulled you close, practically hugging you. You turn your head to face him. "Sea." He clicked his tongue and furrowed his brows, trying to seem angry, but you could see the hurt in his eyes.
"No." And with that, you were being carried back inside. You thought he would bring you to your room and put you to sleep, but he didn't. Instead, he brought you to the wheelhouse with him, using a spell to keep the ship moving without him having to steer.
"No sleep?" You asked worriedly, maybe he's decided to punish you by keeping you awake. He sighs and holds you closer. "You'll sleep eventually, but you're staying with me." He speaks low, you can't even turn to see his expression because of the distance (or lack thereof) between the both of you, but you could hear something in his voice. It sounded sad. You couldn't hear it well though, so you're not sure.
"Why?" You could just feel his breath on your shoulder. "So you don't leave." There it was, that extra something in his voice. It definitely sounded sad. He leans his head against yours, you've noticed he's been getting more physical with you every day. "But if I in chest to sleep, won't leave." He scoffed. "You could easily leave while I'm not looking. I'm not taking any chances."
You think that's really dumb. He's definitely right, you could easily leave when he isn't looking, and you probably would. But you still think it's dumb.
You say the first thing that comes to your mind. "Could bite you now and leave when you drop me." He pauses for a second then chuckles. You can feel it more than you hear it, and you're not really sure how you feel about that, or how you want to feel about that.
"You used to bite us when you didn't want us in the same room as you before, I'm pretty sure we're used to it by now." He sits you down on the chair next to the wheel and starts steering the ship.
"Thought boat moved by itself?" He put a spell, didn't he? "The boat doesn't move by itself, star. I used a magic spell to put it on autopilot, but only for a minute or two." Magic, right. That's what they used to heal your scars too! "Why not always? Then you never steer." He smiled and shook his head with a sigh. "It doesn't work like that." "Why no?"
"Because." He glanced at you. "If we use too much magic, it wears us out. We'll get very exhausted and faint, and probably die if it's that extreme." Your eyes widened, you did not like the sound of that. "Die?" You tried to make your voice sound less worried than you actually were, but you're not sure it worked. He shrugged. "Probably."
Okay, so, that's a no for spending more time with them. That's fine actually, it would've made it harder to leave the ship anyway. You still didn't like the thought of them dying though.
He smiled and patted your head. "Don't worry, we don't use a lot of magic, so we won't die from that." Well, that was somehow more comforting than you think it should've been. At least you don't have to worry about them dying from magic though.
The rest of the night, you and Lucien just talked, the subject didn't matter, you talked about everything. He would take every chance he had to ruffle your hair, boop your nose, hug you, and just be physical with you. You didn't really mind, if anything, you really enjoyed it.
You talked for what seemed like 7 hours, but was probably only 3, as sleep was taking over you. Lucien put the ship on autopilot again when he noticed you yawning.
"You tired now?" You tried to blink away the sleepiness, but that only made it worse. "No, brain just slow." You wanted to talk more with him, but you knew you would fall asleep any minute now.
He chuckled and picked you up. "Oh really?" You were too tired to fight back. "Mmyeah." Your eyes closed on their own (traitors) and you couldn't open them no matter how hard you tried. "You sure? Because you seem very tired to me." His voice was closer than before and you felt yourself being put in something. You instantly knew it was your chest, because where else would they put you?
"Goodnight starfish." That was the last thing you heard before you drifted off to sleep.
#oh yeah i write for my own enjoyment#AAAAAA#this was such A PAIN#*proceeds to put myself through the horrors just to get this chapter out*#this isnt even worth how much yall had to wait for it#im so sorry#i feel bad#i didnt even get to add what i wanted to the end because that would've meant you guys waiting longer#thank you guys for being so patient with me#my writing#sun x reader#moon x reader#mer!y/n#Fish Tales
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