#thank you fi this is vital information to me

[stressedjuice]

Justine have you seen this guy??? I saw him on twitter the other day and immediately thought of you!! Perfect adorable bovine chaos 😂😍

Omg no I haven’t seen this dude before!!! Obsessed that the cow is named Bruce and also. Is the guy single asking for a friend…

[ljandersen]

whats ur status on sideways 👀? No joke i think abt it daily.

Thank you for reaching out, Anon! It means a lot to me, knowing that a story I wrote is thought about every day. I think about it every day, too, being the author! It's still the story I'm proudest to have written.

As for the status on Sideways, it currently exists as a hand-written, rough first draft stored in a fire-proof safe. It needs massive changes -- complete scene rewrites and a ton of new scenes (mostly for the paragon timeline). It's currently on my back burner while I focus on an original project.

All the adjustments I made editing the 750k words in Part 1-4 has culminated in a major undertaking editing Part 5.

For instance, the reason Shepard joins the Alliance on Rannoch is different after my changes in Part 4. Before, I didn't have a very good reason for her being there and, because of that peripheral role, she wasn't directly involved in a lot of the things happening. Now she's acting Counselor. She's front and center.

It's a good change, the right change, which is why I did it. However, now a lot of the plot-centric happenings, which were only heard about or referenced through another character, need full scenes with Shepard being impactful and altering the outcomes (much better than being a removed observer).

This will require several new scenes and throwing out old ones that are now unnecessary. Then I need to relocate any extra bits of vital information not in the new scene, to other places in the story.

In addition to whole new scenes, I need to majorily revise whole scenes. There's a party scene on Rannoch, which now the goal behind it and what Shepard is doing during it, has changed. That series of scenes need rewritten.

That example of Shep's purpose on Rannoch changing scenes downstream is just one -- and a mostly spoiler free one -- of the dozens of changes I need to accomodate.

Also, the paragon timeline in particular requires a lot of new writing, maybe 50 k words of new scenes (so, the equivalent of a full novel).

Toward the end of writing the first draft of Sideways, I was starting to get worn down. Writing four storylines sometimes made it feel like I was spending weeks going nowhere, because I wasn't moving forward in the main Renegade timeline. Because of that frustration and wanting to reach the end, I chose to focus less on the paragon timeline, knowing I would need to add more to it during the editing. I left myself with some major work to do on that storyline to do it justice.

All of those reasons aside, the main reason Sideways Part 5 isn't ready is because I shifted focus for the time being. I'm serializing an original sci fi series and trying to establish myself an author. I intended to do this after I finished posting Sideways, but with the emergence of AI, I don't think the opportunity will be there for me if I wait.

Visibility for writing is going to become impossible and slow human writers, like me, will be washed away under the tide of AI mega production. There's an influential author in the indie world, for example, who has stated his intention to produce 10k novels a year, on par with the big publishing houses. That's one person, who with a handful of contractors previously put out a few dozen books a year, if that many, who now intends to do 10k a year!

My opportunity to find readers is now, while AI is still clunky and not universal, before people selling a back catalog of 100k books and with the ad spending to match drive human writers out of the market.

Because of this new priority, I've had to funnel my creativity and focus into my original writing. I'm not someone who can do two things at once. I'm all in on one project at a time. That's probably apparent from my fanfic, where I've only posted one WIP at a time, start to finish before the next. I can't divide my passion on concurrent WIP.

That doesn't mean I don't think about Sideways though -- I do, daily! -- and I intend to finish it. For now, though, unfortunately, Sideways is a draft in some notebooks in a safe. It's not a simple undertaking to edit it, and I need to focus on a personal goal.

Your interest in Sideways is something I treasure, though, and appreciate beyond words. I'm so glad my story isn't forgotten. I love knowing it's still on readers' minds. It makes me feel like, what had so much meaning to me as its writer, truly must carry that meaning through to the reader, too, which is the greatest joy in sharing a story.

Thank you for taking time to check in on Sideways and for letting me know how much it still means to you.

Also, here is a picture of my new puppy as a tiny consolation for not having Sideways ready:

[cubicdesignzdm]

Trends: What to Expect from Digital Marketing and SEO Agencies This Year

SEO Trends to Watch in 2024:

Search Intent Will Be King:

Search intent—the true purpose behind a user’s search—will continue to guide organic marketers. Understanding what users are really looking for is crucial. Are they seeking quick answers, transactional information, or in-depth knowledge? Meeting search intent requires finesse and a nuanced understanding of your audience’s needs. Keep an eye on how Google responds to this trend—it’s like following the North Star in the SEO galaxy!

AI-Generated Content and Quality:

Brace yourself for the AI revolution! As artificial intelligence generates more content, the challenge lies in creating high-quality material. Some marketers might churn out AI-generated drafts, but those who elevate their game will rise to the top. Think of it as a content quality showdown: AI vs. human creativity. Who will win?

Regular Content Updates:

The days of “set it and forget it” are over. Google loves fresh content. Regular updates signal that your website is alive, kicking, and relevant. So, dust off those old blog posts, give them a makeover, and let them shine anew!

Brand Signals and Authority:

Remember when backlinks and brand signals ruled the SEO kingdom? Well, they’re making a comeback! Google craves trusted, authoritative sources. So, build your brand, earn those backlinks, and let your authority shine like a beacon in the digital fog.

Mobile Page Performance Matters:

Mobile-first indexing isn’t going anywhere. Google’s still peeking at your mobile site before your desktop one. So, optimize for speed, responsiveness, and mobile-friendliness. Your users (and Google’s bots) will thank you! 📱

Page Experience Updates:

Google’s all about user happiness. Expect more emphasis on page experience metrics—like Core Web Vitals. Fast-loading pages, smooth interactions, and delightful designs will be the golden ticket to higher rankings.

Digital Marketing Trends in 2024:

Artificial Intelligence (AI):

AI isn’t just for sci-fi movies. It’s here, and it’s transforming marketing. From personalized recommendations to chatbots, AI enhances user experiences. Imagine an AI assistant whispering, “Psst, this user loves cat videos—show them more!”

E-A-T (Expertise, Authoritativeness, Trustworthiness):

Google’s still obsessed with E-A-T. Prove your expertise, be authoritative, and ooze trustworthiness. It’s like building a digital reputation that screams, “I’m legit!”

Helpful Content Creation:

Content isn’t just about keywords; it’s about helping users. Solve their problems, answer their questions, and be their digital superhero.

Multimedia Magic:

Words are cool, but visuals are cooler. Embrace multimedia—videos, infographics, podcasts. It’s like adding sprinkles to your content cupcake!

Voice Search:

Hey Siri, Alexa, and Google Assistant—are you listening? Voice search is booming. Optimize for voice queries, and your brand might just become the voice of reason!

Local SEO Love:

Local businesses, rejoice! Google’s smitten with local search. Nail your Google My Business profile, gather reviews, and be the neighborhood hero.

Remember, trends are like waves—ride them, adapt, and stay afloat. Whether you’re an SEO wizard or a digital marketing sorcerer, 2024 holds exciting spells and enchantments.

So, my fellow digital voyager, which trend intrigues you the most? Or perhaps you have another magical topic you’d like to explore?

If you’re looking for a partner to elevate your brand online, Cubic Designz might be a great fit!

I’ve summoned the trends from the digital realm! Let me know if there’s anything else you’d like to unravel.  Learn more about these trends and dive deeper into the magic!

[oraclekleo]

Hi Kleo I hope you are doing great. I wanted to request the relationship role reading if it's possible.

Here is the birth chart. Thank you in advance 😁

Hello!

I'm so sorry it took so long but here I am with your Relationship Role reading!

Relationship Role Tarot Reading

Friend - XI Justice, 10 of Cups

You really treat your friends like family. Maybe you even consider them to be your tribe, your community, the family you choose for yourself. You might not be a family by blood but you surely consider your friends vital for your life. They keep you in check with reality, they help you balance your life and when you get lost daydreaming they pull you back or join you on a colourful journey through fantasy, whatever is best at the moment. You are likely to treat your friends as equals, not only to you but also avoiding picking a bias amongst them. You love them all, there’s no need to pick favourites. On the other hand, you don’t take any betrayal lightly. You’re not likely to make excuses for someone who doesn’t deserve your affection and you have no problem saying goodbye to them and cutting them off from your life.

Girlfriend / Boyfriend - 5 of Cups, King of Cups

When it comes to dating, it seems like you had some bad experience and you’re not completely healed just yet. You are on your way there, you are tapping into your emotions and you are in control of them but you might have trust issues when it comes to romantic relationships. You need to let go of the past, stop approaching new relationships with the negative mindset when you think that if that person in the past disappointed you, it’s likely to happen again. Let that boat sail away already and recognize the blessings that are just behind you. Your heart might be tender but it’s capable of healing and rejuvenation.

Lover - 10 of Swords, Page of Wands

These are such contradictory cards. It feels like you have been hurt in the past and now you are trying to heal through daydreaming and fantasy. Maybe you had a bad experience but now you are ready to learn about more opportunities. I see a massive curiosity in your cards so I think that you might be exploring your intimacy and sexuality but more in a safe passive kind of way when you read, watch, listen, acquire information and get inspired. Maybe you like spicy fanfics or things like that where you can find inspiration for your next relationship when it becomes physical. You might feel excited and this explorative process is helping you to heal any insecurities you might have.

Wife / Husband / Spouse - XXI The World, VII The Chariot

Looks like marriage is one of your life goals here or maybe you never considered it your goal but you steadily move towards it. I don’t know whether you are married already or not but it looks like this institution would give you a great sense of accomplishment. You might feel more in charge, more confident in a marriage as it’s both an ever changing and yet fixed kind of structure which allows you to always go for adventures but feel safe at the same time. 

One-Night-Stand - 3 of Wands, Queen of Cups

You might actually be more open to one-night-stands than you would think. It’s not like you would seek them but you might feel excited about trying such a type of short-term relationship. You have an open mind about it and you understand while it might be beneficial for you at certain stages of your life. It might feel adventurous but you are reasonable and cautious about it at the same time, always making sure to protect yourself both physically and emotionally. It might be a once in a lifetime thing for you but you might want to try.

Thank you so much for requesting the reading!

I'm always grateful for any feedback.

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[akinformation]

Page 199

This information I am giving you; if you or any of my assistants had given it, it would have been a disaster. That’s why no one can replace me, that’s why I’m always against it when someone says, “Alex, I can continue your teaching.” No! You have already distorted it a thousand times; it will all go wrong. Because the first person who perceives this information in the wrong way will broadcast it to other people in the wrong way. It will be a total mess, a parody, just a parody. Yes, it isn’t nice, but it’s true. Imagine that instead, my assistant tells you what I am telling you. He doesn’t feel like I do. He doesn’t feel your different levels or know all your types. He would have told you about places of power and how he went to one, then the other, but you would not understand this unless you were the same type of person as him. When I say “for all your types,” I try to break it down for all of you. I am a master of this word. No matter how many of these speakers you have seen, no one can speak like me. Everyone conveys information from their perspective, from some kind of personal prism. But this is stupid. You must address the people so everyone understands, from children to older people. The poor and the rich. Those with a broad outlook as well as those with a narrow one. Are you with me?

You can get sick after visiting places of power. I experienced it. It is normal. Anything can happen after places of power. But even if something scary happens, it is still from God; it is for the good. It is like you were a dried-out tree and no one had watered you before, and you get watered, and a transformation happens. If I feel lost or stuck, I will go to places of power, and the vital mechanism of my life starts running again, and everything turns upside down. Places of power are needed for that. They are useful and important for all people. It is different for you and me. I see a difference now how places of power influence me now compared to before. Before, I was more like you. Now, I’m different, and that’s why I know the difference. I was a raw stone and became a diamond. I was grinded and buffed. And this grinding and polishing improved thanks to places of power. That’s why there were so many turns and changes, and everything went upside down. But it was meant to be, and you will have to go through it as well. And now it’s as if I’m so cleansed that nothing needs to be changed. It is a pure connection to the Wi-Fi. And now, it advances you, gives you an opportunity to strengthen your health, send the intention to space, and receive

[perpetuelledaydreaming]

Cruel intentions | chapter ten

summary: waking up disoriented in a hospital isn't exactly the way you would say a good party ended but maybe, just maybe, swinging through the city was a good way to end the night.

warnings: blood?

authors note: I WANT TO GIVE A SPECIAL THANKS TO ANOTHER SUPPORTER ON KO-FI!!!! x55 like all the support here has make my day.

listen to: Where have you been | Rihanna (playlist here)

word count: 4.1 k

series masterlist + read the next chapter early on my ko-fi!!

HAPPY must’ve misinterpreted your thoughts or your vitals, maybe it was the fact that you seemed like you were hyperventilating as you vomited, or maybe Spiderman was the one that pulled it away from your face but your hands flew immediately to your face as if to cover it although it was useless, you knew it. When the panic subsided, you took a deep breath as you recalled the past events. Mission, Stabbed, Spiderman, Blackout. It wasn’t giving you much information about where you were now, although it wasn’t dark when you woke up though and considering the sluggish nature of your body and the beeping going on around you, it became obvious that you were in a hospital room. 

You glanced out the window, the sky was painted with a pink and reddish color, it was dawn already and you knew you were knocked out for a few hours. You grimaced when you tried to sit down, a sharp pain coming from the place where you’d been stabbed a couple of hours ago. Fuck me, you thought as you took the covers of the bed off and found yourself in a robe and just your underwear. You wondered if they had to cut your suit open but you decided not to dwell on it. Instead, you turned to your right and glanced at, what you believed was, the notes from the doctor. 

Haematemesis, it said with a red underline and you cursed mentally when you saw below the word surgery. You hated hospitals, you hated the sterile atmosphere and most especially, you hated the memories that they brought back to you. You quickly ripped the tubes in your arm via IV with a wince as you tried to stand from the bed and stretch. Your body ached so much but honestly, the pain was dull compared to the one you were feeling a few hours before, you were fixed and better. You flipped through more notes to check what kind of pain meds you were on and if there was anything else you had to be aware of before you left. 

Not that you had a plan on how to leave exactly, you couldn’t be caught dead in a hospital robe and underwear on the streets, especially if someone recognized you. You sighed slowly as your eyes glanced at the room, there wasn’t a bag with your things or your earpiece and there wasn’t even a phone to contact HAPPY.

Was this how Tony felt when he landed in the middle of Texas? You thought. You sighed as you sat back down on the bed for a second, trying to organize your thoughts. 

You knew you needed your earpiece and some clothes fast. You were aware that someone would probably be coming soon to check on you but it was a risk that you couldn’t take. If Tony found out of your little night outings you would probably be sent to Switzerland or Wakanda for god knows how long and you would be painted by the tabloids as a brat that was putting herself in terrible danger to prove her daddy wrong. 

Long story short it would be a bad time. 

You took a deep breath before jumping from the bed and slowly padding through your room, you rubbed your eyes as you got to the door and opened it slowly. The door creaked softly and you hoped no one had heard you, you glanced at the hallway and it was empty, just the normal awful strong lights of the hospital, another hallway that connected with this one, the stairs at the end of the hallway and an elevator at the other end. 

“Thank fucking god,” you mutter to yourself, you almost didn’t even realize what you were doing until you’d slipped out of your room. You began to make your way through the other rooms in the hallway but there was no one and nothing. No clothes, not even blankets, but you knew there had to be another floor full of patients and clothes that you could steal. 

Maybe it wasn’t the best thought plan you’d had but surely, you thought, people would leave clothes unattended in a hospital, and at least most of them would have a loved one that would bring them clothes, so you couldn’t feel that sorry for such a petty crime. You just needed clothing from civilians but honestly, you would feel fine if you found scrubs, honestly, anything was better than the robe that you were wearing, which was clearly showing your underwear from the back, your whole back and ass were out.

You quickly started making your way to the elevator to move through the floors, you turned around to check on the hallway and there was still no one, you felt almost out of breath as you reached the elevator and quickly pressed the button. 

The elevator dinged and you sighed contently, maybe just maybe it had been a good plan. The elevator was almost there and you felt like you’d done it, you were almost out but at that moment, you heard footsteps and whispers.

You snapped your head towards where the noises were coming from and you felt your heart drop. They were coming for you, not people going up and down the stairs or simply voices coming from the other hallway, they were coming to where you were. 

You glanced at the closest room but they weren’t close enough, if you even tried it you would just be seen padding around pathetically trying to hide and you couldn’t risk yourself bleeding out again with any strong movement, you simply couldn’t. Your only choice was for the elevator to open at that second. 

“Come on, Come on,” you mainly grumbled to yourself as you pressed the button again but it was too late. 

The footsteps and whispers ricocheted through your hallway and you wished you didn’t recognize his voice, you felt like you wanted to die right there and then, they were probably looking at you as if you were a mad woman. 

“y/n?” Spiderman asked softly. 

“Ms. Stark?” another voice asked. 

Fuck me. 

You probably looked like a mad woman. You were cursing the elevator softly, you were showing your underwear and you were wearing no shoes. You felt your cheeks getting warmer by the second and you closed your eyes, hoping that maybe the tears of anger in your eyes would subside. 

Begrudgingly, you turned around slowly towards the voices as your cheeks got warmer and warmer by the second, you would be glad if just right there you would pass out and you felt like passing out but nothing happened. There he was the menace of the city according to the Daily Bugle and a Doctor, she was young, really young, and she seemed to be extremely disturbed by your little show. 

“I…” you muttered but you just couldn’t find the words. “I-I was looking for my things,” you stumbled to find the right pitch in your voice but it all went through the window once you saw, really saw Spiderman. 

He hadn’t cleaned his suit, he was still covered in blood. You felt your cheeks tingling with heat from the embarrassment, you had actually puked all over one of the most recognizable heroes of New York City and now he had watched you in your underwear and not in the fun and sexy way that you would usually show your underwear in. 

“This?” he asked softly as he lifted softly the bag he was holding in his hands. 

Your eyes went to the bag immediately and you saw the red-stained suit and bag along with a small earpiece. You sighed contently as you started to softly paddle your way towards them, you tried to pretend that you didn’t notice the Doctor’s small winced as she looked at the way you walk and held your stomach, a little bit hunch over because of the plain. 

“And why do you have it?” you asked as you took a hold of the bag before looking up at Spiderman and raising your eyebrows inquisitively. 

“Oh,” the Doctor said. “We usually give the patient’s companion their things,” she explained to you, watching you take the bloody earpiece and place it on your right ear, she winced but you honestly didn’t care.

A little blood never killed anybody, you thought to yourself.  

“Well,” you chuckled as you gazed back at Spiderman. “He brought me here against my will so…”

Spiderman quickly seemed to tense up but then he stumbled through his words, just as you’d had before, while he gazed at the Doctor and back at you. 

“I- I didn’t, I- you had a wound on your- you could’ve, you could’ve died!” he exclaimed and you just felt like laughing a little bit, but you chose a small smile. 

“Calm down, Spiderling,” you said softly. “I didn’t mean it like that, thank you,” you replied softly. 

“You’re welcome,” he replied softly. 

His voice faded out as you gazed at him and goosebumps appeared on your skin. His voice sparkled with sincerity and was so soft that you felt like there was just you and him there. He was sweet, it made you simply melt and ooze something that you never thought you would feel again in a while.  

At least not until you met Peter Parker. 

But your thoughts were quickly snapped away by the Doctors voice, both Spiderman and you whipped your heads towards her. 

“I’m Dr. Claire Temple,” she said as she cleared her voice and offered you her hand. “I performed general surgery on you about five hours ago and I wanted you to stay a little bit longer for observation,” she stated as you finished shaking her hand. 

She seemed young but honestly, her eyes were the things you noticed first, and those big brown eyes seemed like she had lived a thousand lives. They were harsh, she had dark bags under her eyes and you could tell it had been a long night and probably it was your fault. She stood up straight as she gazed at you and you could tell she was more on the strict side of things, but that just made you wonder why and how she had gotten herself into this line of work and being friends with Spiderman. 

And although you would’ve liked to know and appreciated her insight, you needed to politely decline. 

“Oh no,” you said and Claire immediately raised her eyebrow. “I can’t like no one knows I’m…” your words died down in your throat as you tried to find the right words for your activities. 

“Still a superhero?” Spiderman intervened and you turned to him with a frown. 

“It’s not like that, I-” you explained but she cut you off. 

“You don’t have to worry,” she replied as she quickly pointed to your room and started to walk there. “I and the people who work for me are very discrete with everything that may happen in your line of work,” 

You open your mouth. Close it. You frown at her words. 

“Wait, do you mean you,” you chuckled to yourself because it seemed a bit ridiculous that someone in New York was patching multiple heroes left and right without anyone noticing. “You are always fixing up superheroes?”

She shrugged. “Something like that,” she replied as she nudge her head for you to enter the room. 

But you were still apprehensive. 

“That’s cool, but I need to go, honestly I’m fine.” you lied as you felt the pain in your limbs and wound just seem to get stronger, the pain meds were fading away and your body was just starting to feel it. “I just really need to get dressed and get to my home before someone starts asking questions,”

“y/n, please,” Spiderman muttered and you felt your whole body trembling just by the way he was saying your name. 

It felt too familiar. 

“Ms. Stark, I promised to do a quick check-up and maybe give you some pain killers unless you-” she explained but you cut her off. 

“Yeah, the pills and the cocaine don’t worry. Just a cover,” you explained and she nodded as her lips formed into a line.  

“Okay, so come in, I’ll give you some meds and you can be on your way,” she insisted and you sighed, you looked up to Spiderman for a second. 

He quickly straighten his stand as your eyes fell on him and he cleared his throat for a second as he looked at the room and the Doctor. “I’ll go,” he muttered as he turned on his heels.

He must’ve given two or three steps but before you even knew you were speaking, it was almost involuntary. 

“Wait,” you said a little bit too loud and Spiderman immediately turned around. 

He stared at you and knew you didn’t have to say it. 

“Are you sure?” he asked. 

Honestly, at first, you didn’t know exactly what to say or exactly what you were asking him. Gosh, you didn’t know him twenty-four hours ago but he had already saved your life and you felt something warm and comforting when you looked at him. Maybe it was the pain or the meds or just the adrenaline, honestly, maybe it could’ve been just you. 

“Yeah, I don’t want to be alone,” you replied with a wry smile. 

Your whole body was vibrating with nervous energy. Your fingers were ice-cold and your throat was burning hot as you waited for an answer. Was it too weird to ask a stranger to stay with you for a medical check-up? Did you seem too immature? 

“Okay,” he muttered as he got closer and walked with you to the room. 

The exam was rather fast and Spiderman even held your hand softly when Claire had changed the bandages of your wound and your hand shot up to the side of the bed, your knuckles turning white as you fell in the bed with force. You’d no idea why it hurt so much, you didn’t like also the idea of Claire touching you so roughly to the point that between clenched teeth you muttered that you weren’t super strong and that you didn’t heal quickly like Spiderman. Claire’s eyes widened before she muttered a small sorry and Spiderman chuckled softly before his hand covered yours. You glanced up at him and you nodded thankfully before taking a deep breath and letting her continue her work. 

In the meanwhile as she finished, she and Spiderman told you about the ‘Night clinic’, a couple of very private and discrete doctors would take in some of New York’s heroes. Apparently, there were more than just Spiderman, which only made you even more curious because you’d no idea there were more heroes than the ones that you’d known since you were a child. 

Soon, Claire was giving you the prescription for the pain meds and antibiotics you needed, you would ask HAPPY to buy them for you as soon as you got to your place. Moreover, she recommended bed rest for at least two weeks, although by the way she was glaring at you when she said it, you knew that she knew that that wasn’t going to happen. 

In no time, Claire was gone and you were alone with Spiderman in the room. He watched you silently as you took your suit out of the bag, the black suit had indeed been cut in the torso and it was still soaked in blood. You felt your heart constricting painfully at the memory of Natasha when she gave you the suit and although you knew she had left more on the Compound, it was too painful for you to go back, but you still needed to. 

Spiderman turned around as soon as you sighed as you tried to put on your suit anyway, at least that way you would have something to cover your underwear and you wouldn’t be walking half-naked through the main entrance of Stark Tower. 

“y/n?” he said. It felt like someone was dragging a finger down the length of your spine. You’d shivered suddenly aware that although you were opposite sides of the bed and although he was looking away, you had little to no clothes on and were in the same room. “You’re going to ask for a car?” he asked. 

“That’s the idea and pray that no one notices me,” you replied softly as you breathed out while you tore the robe from your body and place the torn suit on the rest of your body. You sighed relief as you finally zipped it up. 

“Do you?” he started but cut himself off. “Uhm, would you be okay if…” he tried again but it seemed like he couldn’t choose the right words and he sighed frustrated with himself. You turned towards him as he managed to let out his words. “I can swing you over there, leave you at your window?” his voice sounded rushed with a little bit of an edge as if he was too nervous to talk to you as if he hadn’t been doing it for hours already. 

“Do you want to swing me?” 

He turned around hesitantly. 

“I can, and you wouldn’t have to put on a bloody suit,” he said softly his head cocked a bit to the side as he pointed at you. 

“Are you judging me?” you gasped with a frown. 

“What? No,” Spiderman shook his head quickly and you felt like smiling. 

“I’m still wearing the bloody suit,” you frowned. “I’m not going to let you swing me in my underwear,” you whispered and Spiderman nodded. 

“A shame really,” he replied and your eyes widened, he was sharp and witty and you felt the sides of your lips turning into a smile, and even though you couldn’t see his face, you had a feeling he was smirking. 

Spiderman nodded before he walked towards the window of the hospital and opened it, he proceeded to offer you his hand and you swallowed hard. You hesitated but then you gave him your hand, he pulled you into him slowly and softly, and then his hand traveled to the small of your back pulling you incredibly close to him. You felt your breath hitching suddenly as your hands climbed from his chest to the back of his neck and quickly he pulled you up, your legs immediately wrapped around him tightly. You felt hot with the way you were so close to him and a bit embarrassed. 

“I’ll go slow,” he told you and you just nodded. 

He shot a web and quickly you felt the cool wind of the morning on your body, you curled even more around him when you felt a little bit that you were free-falling but just as he said he would, he swung slowly at an almost lazy pace while he held you close, which caused you to close your eyes and just feel him. He was warm and hot, you noticed, it contrasted too much with the cool air in your body while you hold onto him, there was a searing heat that caused you to shiver. Soon, you nuzzled your face deeper into Spiderman’s neck and held him tighter as you swung through the city, wind whistling around of ears. In part it was in case people saw him carrying someone, you didn’t want anyone seeing your face and the other part was because you felt so good with how he held you. 

Soon, he touched down slowly on your window. You weren’t exactly sure how he’d guessed which one was your room but he was aware of where you lived. You didn’t give too much thought as you tapped your earpiece twice and asked HAPPY to open the window next to your bed. The window opened slowly and Spiderman cradled the back of your neck as he led you both into your bed. He let you down slowly and you couldn’t help but think how this looked if someone came in. Both of you were soaked in blood and were on your bed, he was on top of you and you held your breath as you let your imagination run wild. 

“Are you okay?” He said when he notice how your cheeks were turning bright red. 

“Yes,” you lied as you started to take off your suit, maybe it was the pain meds that were making you so bold but you knew it was just you. 

“O-Oh,” Spiderman cleared his throat as soon as he realized and quickly turned around in your room. He stood awkwardly and you couldn’t help but bite your lip as you took slipped the suit from your body and took the sweater you used to sleep on. Then, you climbed into the bed slowly, pulling the covers so he wouldn’t see your underwear. 

Not that it mattered after all you’d gone through. 

“Thank you for saving my life,” you replied softly and Spiderman finally turned around, leaning in a bit as if getting a better view of you as you started at him from your bed. 

“Anytime,” he nodded and before you knew it, he was already moving out the window. Without saying anything and you frowned at his movements. 

You didn’t know exactly how you felt after the last few hours. You highly doubted that if you were one hundred percent in your right mind, but god, it just seemed like you couldn’t let it go. 

“Hey,” you said and Spiderman turned around just at the edge of the window, he was about to jump but he turned around and suddenly the air felt a bit heavy. You crawled through the bed until you were at the edge of the window and you felt your heart thundering in your chest. You rested your hand on his shoulders softly, feeling the material under your fingertips and then running them through his collarbones. Spiderman didn’t flinch and you were thankful, soon you found the edge of his mask and you felt him tensing up. “I don’t normally do this but I’m really thankful,”

Spiderman let a hesitant breath out and your hands began to tremble as you slide his mask up softly, he didn’t stop you, he simply stayed still. The proximity felt like it was too much and you felt as if your fingers were on fire as you worked softly on his mask. Once the mask was lifted until his mouth you gave a shaky breath, pausing just for a moment while you looked at him. His lips seemed soft and they were pink, he had a nice mouth you thought. Then you grabbed the back of his neck. 

Spiderman welcomed the kiss, capturing your lips as his left hand cupped your cheek and pulled you in closer. You whimpered at how his lips were hot against yours, they were plush and fervent to press against yours. The kiss wasn’t sweet or soft, it was frantic and sloppy but it was perfect and all you could think about was him. His lips pressed against yours, his hand holding the back of your neck as he kissed you purposefully and you clung to him desperately. 

You suddenly were made aware of how difficult it was to breathe and you finally let go, you were breathing heavily, eyes still closed as you pressed your forehead against his. 

“I…” he whispered finally but you pulled down his mask quickly as you bit your lower lip. 

“Bye Spiderman,” you replied softly and he shook his head, again, you suspected there was a smirk under his mask and before you knew it, he jumped from the building and leaped into another one. 

You sighed as you leaned back into the bed softly and you struggle to place an order on your thoughts, shocked by your desire and that you had actually acted on it. You’d kissed strangers, maybe a lot of strangers in the last few years but you were pretty self-controlled and had never given too much to someone. The desire, everything came usually from them and you simply received it. But that, you didn’t, it wasn’t like anything you could think of, you were unable to put into words what you felt as you pressed his lips against yours. 

You smiled mostly to yourself until you heard your phone ringing on the suit that was on the floor, you leaned softly and there was a message. 

Peter Parker: Hey, did you get home safe?

***

author's note: I really like this chapter and the next one might be a filler but I'm still like really happy about this ones because now there's a love triangle. As always thank you so much for everyone being so nice and reading this!! and in KO-FI TOO I LOVE YOU ALL. as always lmk what you think, I love to read your theories and thoughts!!

taglist: @walkintheprk @jeonzll @hoetel-manager @pbeckn26 @novaspietro @s-we-e-t-t-ea @spideys-world @ayoelouise e @lnmp89

***

feedback is always welcomed

help me with my laptop or buy me a coffee? thank youuu

[ivorydragoness44]

Imagine swooning over Leonard McCoy:

  “One more?” Leonard McCoy asked as he was storing away his now folded laundry.

  “Yes, the last one. One more truth,” you said, closing his closet doors and turning toward him.

  “All right.” He dragged out his sigh as he closed the drawer, but still had yet to face you again. “At first, before we started dating, I...I thought that you liked Jim.”

  There was a pause as you processed this new information. “Jim?” You asked, the humor in your question enticing him to turn around.

  “What’s so funny?” He leaned against the dresser with eyebrows knitted in confusion. “Usually Jim is the one getting all of the dates.”

  A laugh escaped your lips and you felt no regrets about it. “Leonard Horatio McCoy, do you not know how amazing and utterly irresistible you are?” You gawked.

  The smirk he tried to conceal did not go unnoticed by you. “I wouldn’t say irresistible...”

  “Irresistible!” You called out to him to make a point. “Look at this, I’m swooning,” you said, carefully yet dramatically dropping to the floor with a hand to your forehead.

  Your own smile widened at the sight of his.

  Leonard shook his head and made his way over to you. “Was that you swooning?”

  “You’re too handsome, I can hardly bare it.”

  Kneeling down to your level, he gently grabbed ahold of you to help you back up onto your feet. As he did so, he pulled you into his arms, and kissed you sweetly on the lips.

  “If you didn’t have me so giddy right now, I’d have half a mind to check on your vitals...falling to the floor,” he said, shaking his head again.

  “I don’t know...if you check me out, I might swoon again.”

  He gave you a small squeeze in his arms. “That’s not what I meant...ah, but...you’re ridiculous and I love you.”

~~~~ ~~~~

Thank you for reading!

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[yuta-nakamots]

only human - d.sc

Pairing - Boyfriend!Sicheng x Fem!Reader

Genre - Angst, Smut, Fluff, Established Relationship!AU

Warnings - implied character death, description of having a stroke, unprotected sex, creampie, cock warming

Summary - You dream about Sicheng all the time and love telling him about them when you wake up. But this one, you hope to never see again even if it did give you a happy ending.

Word Count - 2.1k 

A/N - I really did dream this about Sicheng but without the smut lmao I was so freaked out when it was happening 

Written for the Dreams Unfold Event hosted by @neosmutcollective​. Check out the masterlist here.

You were driving on the freeway to a destination unknown, accompanied by your boyfriend Sicheng and his close friend Lucas. The reason why Lucas was with you was also unknown. There were hardly any other cars on the road, your headlights casting a desolate glow in front of you.

It was almost completely silent aside from the quiet lo-fi music that Lucas was playing through the sound system until suddenly from beside you, “where is my arm?” Sicheng muttered. You paid it no thought, thinking he was just drowsy from sleep. “How is the road?” His voice rose at the end, as if he didn’t know what the word ‘road’ meant.

“It’s good babe, it’s not too bumpy or anything,” you answered, playing along with whatever charade he was putting on.

“My head...hurts,” he groaned, “and we spin?” At this rate you were getting really concerned. Looking over at him, his face was contorted in pain as he was curled against the door, showing that he wasn’t just spouting nonsense.

“Lucas,” you whispered, checking into the rear-view mirror for him, “call the ambulance,” you ask of him once you see that he’s awake. He did what he was told as you pulled over to the shoulder of the road. “Give me the phone,” you commanded anxiously, which Lucas gladly obliged to, probably because he had no idea what to say anyways.

“911, what’s your emergency?” The operator began.

Your focus was on Sicheng again as you tried to describe his state. “Hi, I was driving on the I-205 and my boyfriend began saying weird things and saying his head hurts and something is spinning.”

There was a slight pause as the operator took note of the situation. “Ma’am, did he mentioned anything else.”

You knew he had said other things but couldn’t remember exactly what they were. You watched as his right hand flew to his left bicep before he whimpered pathetically, “arm gone.”

“He keeps saying that his arm is gone, but it’s clearly not.” You relayed.

“And these statements, are they in full, coherent sentences?” The operator asked.

“No, not really.”

“Ma’am I believe he is having a stroke. Please give me an address or approximate area so I can send an ambulance your way.”

“Uh, we just passed exit 288 I believe, we’re pulled over on the right hand side of the road on the I-205.”

“Alright thank you, medical support will be there soon. Please stay on the line with me until they arrive.” You nodded as if they could see you. “Where were you traveling to?”

“I-I don’t really know…”

“Uh-huh,” the operator acknowledged as if you had said a real location, “and who are you traveling with?”

“It’s me, my boyfriend, and our close friend.”

“May I ask for all your names and your phone number?”

By the time you had given the operator all the information, you could already see the flashing lights of the ambulance as it approached. “I think I see the ambulance.”

“Alright ma’am, thank you for your cooperation and I wish you the best.” With that the line went dead. How odd.

You stepped out of the car and motioned for Lucas to do the same. As the paramedics came to greet you with a stretcher, you led them to the passenger door, opening it as gently as possible so Sicheng wouldn’t fall out. He kept moaning and muttering things incoherently though he was clearly in even more pain and was more confused than before as the paramedics situated him onto the stretcher.

You and Lucas followed them as they loaded him onto the ambulance and allowed them to do their job. They were hooking him up to machines to take his vitals and you must’ve looked awfully distraught for Lucas to speak up. “He’ll be okay, you know.”

“How do you know that?” You question.

Lucas shrugged, “I don’t know for sure but it’s better than saying he won’t be okay, isn’t it?”

“Yeah,” you sighed apprehensively, “I guess.”

There was a commotion coming from inside the ambulance and you saw them beginning to do CPR on Sicheng and his heart rate flat-lined. Something about this didn’t seem quite right. If he is experiencing a stroke, why would they be doing compressions? As far as you knew, a stroke dealt with the brain while CPR was meant for the heart. And weren’t they supposed to be doing all this on the way to the hospital?

After what seemed like only a few seconds, the paramedics stopped assisting him and their leader came up to you, “he is dead but we will take him to the hospital for clearance.”

“W-what?!” You exclaimed as the paramedic walked away. Lucas had to hold you back from going after them and only released you once the ambulance started to pull away. “He’s dead? He can’t be, there’s no way! I swear humans can survive a few minutes without a pulse...they didn’t even try to restart it with the AED!”

As you stormed over to get into your car and follow the ambulance, Lucas held you once again, bringing you into a hug. “Y/n, it’s okay,” he whispered, grasping onto you firmly, the rumble of his voice spreading through you.

“But Sicheng isn’t okay! You can’t just let him go like that!”

“It’s okay,” Lucas repeated, though this time you felt his grasp on your arm get tighter and almost as if he was shaking you. “It’s okay,” he said once more, “y/n, wake up,” he pleaded. Though the voice wasn’t his, it was Sicheng’s.

“Wake up,” you heard once more and you felt your realities shift as your eyes sprung open staring straight into Sicheng’s from where he laid next to you, your limbs flailing at your sudden consciousness. “Hey, calm down, it’s just a dream,” he told you, one of his hands coming to rest on your cheek.

“It was- You were- Th-they said you were dead! You had a stroke and died but they didn’t even help you!” You spewed.

“Baby, it’s okay, I’m right here,” Sicheng assured you, “look, we’re in our room, in our bed, and it’s 4am in the morning.” He could tell you still didn’t believe him entirely. “We are not in a hospital, trust me. This is our apartment, the one we bought together last year.”

As your sense started to return to normal, your brain finally wrapped itself around the situation and you swung a leg over Sicheng, straddling him before leaning down and kissing him. “I though you were gone,” you confessed, tears welling up in your eyes at the thought of losing him.

“I’m right here,” he promised between kisses, “I’m not going anywhere.”

You basked in the feeling of his lips on yours, your tongues entertwining as Sicheng deepened the kiss. He wrapped an arm around your waist before sitting up, both of your torsos pressed tightly together. As you settled back into his lap, you felt something poking into your thigh. You broke the kiss to look down and saw the clear bulge in his athletic shorts, confirming your suspicions. “Dong Sicheng, I can’t believe you’re hard right now, at this very moment.” He pursed his lips, his eyes going wide as they bore into yours, waiting for your next move. “I had a nightmare that you died and you’re turned on by that?”

“No no, I’m not turned on by that-”

“Then what is it?”

“I don’t know,” his hands flew up in exasperation, “I just woke up from you tossing and turning and it was like this.”

Resting your arms around his shoulders and bringing your forehead to his, you brought your bodies impossibly closer while ever so slightly shifting around in his lap to tease him. “I don’t believe you,” you told him with a smirk.

“Well are you going to help me or not?” He nearly pleaded, his hips pushing up against yours.

You snuck a hand past the waistband of his shorts, unsurprised at his lack of underwear. “I guess I have to,” you complied, grabbing ahold of his warm and pulsing length. You began pumping a hand up and down his cock, causing his head to fall to the crook of your neck. Sicheng left messy kisses across the expanse of your neck, and exposed collar, his hands going up your shirt to gently cup your breasts until he decided his was tired of it and began puling your shirt off.

The second it was off past your chest, Sicheng’s lips were already on you, covering the untouched areas of your chest, latching onto a nipple while his hand played with the other. You cradled his head almost as if he were a baby, with both of your hands getting lost in his soft brown hair. You let him suck and fondle at your breasts for a little while longer until the ache in your core grew to be too much.

After sliding your bottoms and near-soaked underwear off, you repositioned yourself above the head of his cock, using a hand to help guide his member into you. As you lowered yourself onto his length, Sicheng busied himself with kissing along your jaw, his hands moving to hold your hips once you were fully seated in his lap. Ever so slowly, you let yourself rise and fall on his cock, making him moan and lean backwards against the headboard of the bed.

Placing your hands on his broad chest, you used it to gain leverage as you began bouncing on his dick. Sicheng looked so pretty beneath you, his cheeks flushed a light shade of pink, his lips plump and slick, his skin covered in the slightest sheen of sweat. You continued your movements until you felt your legs growing tired, opting instead to draw mindless shapes in his lap. You relished in the way his slick member slid in and out of you, feeling so good when it stretched you out.

This tempo wasn’t all to Sicheng’s liking though, but he took matters into his own hands, his arms coming up from behind you, his fingers gripping onto your shoulders as he rolled the two of you over and began rocking his hips into yours. You wrapped your legs around him, allowing him to push deeper into you as he gradually started to go at a steady pace.

He let go of your frame in exchange for planting his forearms on either side of your head so he could watch your expressions as he got high off of his cock. Your eyes closed at the feeling of overwhelming pleasure when he hit the deeper parts of you, filling you up ever so perfectly. “Yes, just like that,” you told him as your walls were clenched around him, so soft and warm whenever he thrusted into you.

Sicheng started to let out little whimpers as he continued thrusting, a sign that he was getting close. You reached a hand down to stimulate your clit, wanting to come with him while he moved to sit back on his knees, pulling your body further down the bed. In this position, he began drilling into you as he desperately chased his high. “Let me do it,” he breathed when he saw your hand between your legs. He pushed it away and quickly replaced it with his own, his thumb drawing circles onto your clit.

You heard his breath hitch and felt his hips stutter as his length twitched inside of you. Sicheng pushed himself to be fully connected with you as he released in your walls, shallowly thrusting as if to milk his own dick, “I love you,” you quietly blurted. The feeling of his hot cum spreading in your core brought you to your own orgasm, your muscles fluttering and spasming around him. Sicheng held you as you powered through your own release on his member, not wanting to lose the feeling of warmth around him just yet.

“Fuck, I love you too,” you answered as you started coming down off your high. You could feel the mix of your juices start to spill out when Sicheng set your hip back down onto the bed and moved to lie on top of you. His cock was softening inside of you but you didn’t mind it all that much since you were already on you way to sleep again though hopefully with a more pleasant dream this time.

[four-loose-screws]

FE8 Novelization Translation - Chapter 17, Section 2

If you would like to start from the beginning, read a missed part, etc., click here!

FE Game Script Translations - FE Novel Translations - Original FE Support Conversations

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———————————

I call this a “section” because it is not a separate part of the chapter in the book, but divided from the rest of the chapter by a scene break.

———————————

Chapter 17 - The Demon King's Shadow (con’t)

Frelia's pegasus knight unit was continuing to desperately defend against an overwhelmingly large enemy army.

Their entire unit had already been nearly wiped out, and the remaining soldiers were putting all of their strength into defending the bridges. If they fell here, then the enemy could invade in one fell swoop, and the people of Narube would likely be massacred without resistance.

"Those who can move, take the citizens south!" Syrene, the leader of the pegasus knight unit, shouted as loudly as she could while swinging around her lance and fending off the enemy's onslaughts.

However, she hardly had any knights left that could follow that order. Even if the knights managed to get the children atop the pegasi, their wings were damaged, and they couldn’t fly. Even the citizens who had panicked and cried at first had already lost the energy to do that any longer, and exhaustedly slipped into utter silence.

They’d made a major miscalculation. The Grado Army had lost the capital, yet still had a large number of soldiers left.

If the knights thought only about themselves, then they had the possibility to take advantage of their pegasi’s mobility and retreat, but they couldn’t abandon the people of Narube just to escape.

“We’re at our limit, Lady Syrene! We’ll buy you some time! Please do whatever it takes to get out of here!” A knight wearing armor covered in blood yelled at her.

But Syrene shook her head.

She had no intention of running away until the very end. The bodies of the Frelian soldiers who’d exhausted all of their strength lay around her. She was ready to die here in battle herself as well.

Her only regret was that she couldn’t live up to Prince Innes’ hopes for her. She remembered the day that she’d officially become the leader of the pegasus knights as if it was yesterday. The prince had personally given her a beautiful whip and said that the pegasus knight unit was the pride and joy of Frelia, and he wanted them to fight for their homeland so long as they drew breath.

His words filled her chest with deep emotions. She swore to herself that she would devote herself to Frelia… and Prince Innes and Princess Tana.

The plan was to unite her forces with the prince’s at Narube River and fight together at full strength under his orders. However, before that could happen, she would probably see her end. Regret burned in her heart.

Her younger sister was together with the prince. That was her only consolation. If her sister could protect the prince when she couldn’t… then that was all she could ask for.

“Lady Syrene, that’s…!” One of the knights shouted.

Was it more enemy reinforcements? Just how much leftover strength could the Grado Army have at this point? 

The moment Syrene was about to succumb to her despair, she looked at where her soldier was pointing, and instinctively breathed a sigh of belief.

A large army was nearing from the south. They were still a considerable distance away, so she couldn't clearly make out who they were, but the color of their armor was different from that of the Grado Army.

"Is that… the Renais Army…?" The moment Syrene whispered, a single pegasus knight appeared from the oncoming crowd, and flew straight in her direction. 

Syrene knew who it was before her eyes could even confirm the rider’s face, as she could distinguish the slight but distinct strong wing movements and neck shaking of individual pegasi.

She smiled without even thinking about it, and felt a weight be lifted off her shoulders that had been with her since the beginning of the war.

“Commander Syrene, are you alright?!” The knight riding the pegasus shouted, and swiftly threw a javelin at a Grado soldier coming at her while avoiding his own attack.

She effortlessly hit her target, showing her strength. ‘She’s gotten so much stronger in such a short amount of time.’ Syrene thought.

“Vanessa, you’re here! Meaning…”

“Yes, Prince Innes and Princess Tana are with me! They are safe as well!”

“Thank goodness…” Relief warmed her heart. 

Vanessa continued in a commanding tone, “Please stand down, Commander! We’ll take it from here.”

“No, I...”

‘...am not severely injured,’ she started to say, but thought twice about it.

Both her and her unit were already at the limits of their stamina. Even if she continued to be stubborn and fight on the front line, she would do the exact opposite of help, and get in her allies’ way. It was wiser for her to retreat for the moment, recuperate, and then pick up her weapon again.

“Understood! I will stand down for now, and let your commander take over from here. Please tell them I said so.”

“Yes Ma’am!”

“And Vanessa.”

Vanessa tried to guide her pegasus higher into the sky, but Syrene called out to her again.

Vanessa turned back around and no longer had her previous tense expression on her face, perhaps because she had finally relaxed. 

Syrene responded in a casual tone, “It looks like you’ve been playing a very big role as a soldier of Princess Eirika’s guard. I was really worried when I heard that you’d been betrayed in Carcino, but… I finally feel at ease.”

“Thank you Ma’am…!”

"Your spearmanship has improved greatly since we parted as well. And you've become a bit more beautiful too."

Vanessa’s eyes widened at suddenly being teased, and her cheeks turned red. “S-Sister…!”

No matter how good their relationship was as sisters, on the battlefield, they were commander and subordinate. To Vanessa, who was so serious it made her formal and strict, keeping that distinction was of vital importance. But right now, even she had forgotten herself.

Syrene laughed out loud and guided her pegasus to softly spread her wings.

Her pegasus had taken an enemy attack, which seriously injured her wing. She wanted her beloved pegasus to be healed as quickly as possible. To a pegasus knight, her pegasus was more than just a simple mount. They were invaluable partners whose fates were linked to each other.

“I’ll see you again later, Vanessa.” Syrene parted ways with her sister for the time being, and her pegasus flew off, leading her exhausted unit.

The Renais Army had crossed the bridge and was coming closer. Syrene stopped her pegasus and landed on the ground.

Everyone was injured and bleeding. Their uniforms had been beautiful and stunning when they left home, but now, they looked like they never could have been such dazzling garments. However, each and every one of their faces were lit up like the sun.

Syrene knelt down on one knee before Eirika and bowed her head. “Reporting, Princess Eirika of Renais! The Frelian Army was surprise attacked by the Grado Army, and we regrettably lost most of our soldiers. But only a few of the people of Narube have been killed since the beginning of the attack, and the rest are safe.”

“Good work. All of you please take whatever time you need to recuperate.” 

Eirika’s voice was soft and kind. Just her words alone healed Syrene of her exhaustion.

“Are you alright, Syrene?”

She recognized Prince Innes’ voice, and looked up.

He was standing next to Eirika. Among his dirt-covered army, he stood out as the one refined person. He of course should be tired since he had traveled on a long journey together with the soldiers, but he didn’t show it in the slightest. His clothing looked as if a tailor had just dressed him.

“Lord Innes… I am sorry. The Frelian Army is unable to merge with Renais’ Army. We’ve suffered too much damage, and…”

"Never mind that. None of you have anything you need to worry about. We’ll take it from here.”

His words were reassuring. ‘It appears that Vanessa is not the only one who’s grown up while we were apart.’ She felt that Prince Innes had also become even stronger since the last time they’d seen each other.

‘Perhaps…’ Syrene thought. ‘Vanessa has become more beautiful because of Prince Innes?’ It was difficult for her to imagine Vanessa falling in love with any ordinary man. If he wasn’t a partner that she could respect with all of her heart, then he likely wouldn’t be able to steal it. And If there was any man that Vanessa could respect, it was of course...

“Syrene, do you know any information about the enemy commander?”

Innes asked her in a harsh tone.

Syrene shook her head. “There is a fort on the other side of the river. The enemy commander is using it as a base. I heard that it appears to be Prince Lyon leading the army. I have not been able to confirm that myself, but that is what my subordinates reported.”

“Hmm… Do you know anything about Prince Lyon? ...No wait, nevermind.” In a move that was entirely unlike him, Innes hesitated and changed his words. “Asking won’t change anything. For now, Syrene, please get healed, and return quickly to the battlefront. We still need your power.”

“Yes, Your Majesty!”

He seemed worried about Prince Lyon for some reason, but knowing that she and her soldiers were living up to the prince’s expectations made Syrene happy. The pegasus knights had survived their long, grueling fight, retreated for the time being, and were healed by Natasha and the other healers.

“Leave the front line to us. We’ll defend the northern bridge.” Ephraim said and charged his horse straight north. 

His loyal knights Forde and Kyle led his other soldiers and followed after him.

Eirika went with Seth and the others to save the citizens. The group totaled a few dozen men and women huddling together and shaking. Eirika talked to each of them individually to encourage them, helped the injured atop her horse, and led them to a safe place.

Eirika worked as hard as she could, trying not to think about anything she did not need to. But every so often, she would remember that wicked voice. Whenever she thought about Lyon and the pain the Demon King had caused him, she couldn’t stand the feeling she felt. 

‘I ate his heart.’ Or so the Demon King said. If she accepted his words literally, then Lyon’s heart was already gone, and his body entirely controlled by the Demon King. She did not want to believe that such a terrifying thing could be reality.

It had been for only just a moment, but she'd heard Lyon scream. “Run away…” He’d pleaded with all his might. “I’ll destroy you…” There was no way that could have been the Demon King’s voice.

Lyon’s heart had yet to be completely consumed. He'd nearly suppressed the Demon King’s consciousness, and was continuing to just barely manage to fight. He was struggling as hard as he could to remain in control. And that was why they had to press forward. They had to defeat the Demon King and restore his heart.

But on the other hand of that thought, the Demon King's last words weighed heavily on her heart. Ephraim told her not to worry about them, yet she couldn't help but think about them.

Kill Prince Ephraim, and claim Princess Eirika. The Demon King said that was Lyon's desire. A kind man like Lyon shouldn't have such a twisted and ambitious desire… or so she wanted to think, but her heart was no longer sure.

As Lyon was a sickly person, Ephraim had always been the object of his admiration. In situations like when Ephraim was praised by Duessel, or he won a match against a senior knight, Lyon would cheerfully say "You really are amazing, Ephraim!" Those were words of wonder and amazement.

At the time, Eirika didn't think much of it, and just took his words at face value. ...There hadn’t been any warped feelings hiding underneath that adoration, right? He thought Ephraim was amazing… and wanted to be Ephraim… but he couldn’t. Those feelings of inferiority hadn’t turned into jealousy, had they?

“Lady Eirika, we have finished leading the people to safety.” Seth reported.

The pegasus knights had also finished receiving their treatment, and were awaiting Eirika’s orders. Now was not the time to be guessing what was within Lyon’s heart. She had orders to give as her army’s commander.

“Let’s go! We will take the fort across the river and capture Prince Lyon!” Eirika hesitated for a moment, then added, “You must not kill him! We still have a lot of questions for him.”

Syrene and her pegasus knights immediately accepted the order and all flew up into the sky at once. The pegasi had all been healed alongside their riders, and their energy was restored. They flapped their white wings at full strength.

Seth looked up at the pegasus knights and said, “Lady Eirika, I understand how you feel, but Prince Lyon is already…”

“...I know.” She cut off the rest of his sentence, not wanting to hear it.

He looked straight at her. "Our enemy introduced himself as the Demon King. We still do not know whether he truly is or not, but if he is, then this is very serious. Even if we fight him at full strength, we still might not win.”

“...You're right.”

“It’s a shame that his heart is in chaos on the outside, but…”

“I know. I’ll be fine, Seth. I’m prepared to fight him.” Eirika nodded with conviction.

She couldn’t make Seth worry, and so she spoke those words to him immediately. In truth, she still didn’t know. Would she be able to turn her sword against him?

Eirika maneuvered her horse to the front line, where Ephraim's group was fighting. She shook off her hesitation and gradually picked up speed.

A harsh battle was unfolding on the northern bridge. Grado dragon knights attacked from the sky, making the fight difficult for Ephraim and his soldiers, but the pegasus knight unit rushed to their side, and started to change their situation bit by bit.

Pegasi were of a smaller build than dragons, but were utterly fearless. They flew bravely at the enemies' chests, and threw them into confusion. Once the dragon unit's movements had broken out into a panic, Innes and Neimi shot arrows straight at them. The arrows flew through the dragon's wings. Their cries pierced the sky, and their riders lost their balance and fell into the river.

Once Eirika's army finally captured the bridge, they used that momentum to continue moving east. They could now see the fort the enemy was using as their base.

"He's in there, right?!" Ephraim asked when Eirika rode up next to him.

Eirika noticed that her brother refused to refer to Lyon by name.

Perhaps Ephraim felt just as lost as Eirika, and that was why he was purposely avoiding referring to Lyon by name. If he said it aloud, it might dull his resolve to fight, no matter what else he did.

The enemy was waiting for them outside of the fort. Eirika's army shifted into a fan formation and surrounded the Demon King.

He had a cruel smile on his face, and waited calmly for them. He no longer seemed to have any interest in pretending to be human. His facial features were clearly Lyon's, but his expressions did not feel human at all.

'That's not Lyon… such a wicked, cold stare could never be Lyon's.' Eirika told herself. But she still could not rid herself of her hesitation, rather, she tried to find if Lyon was left anywhere in his face.

"...So you intend to challenge me?" The Demon King asked. 

The chilling sound of his voice made Eirika's horse tremble so hard she could not calm her.

"You are all so lucky to not yet know my true terror…”

"Get out of Lyon's body!!" Ephraim roared.

Eirika jumped. His voice was filled with an intense anger that she had never once heard come from him in her entire life.

Ephraim did not fear the Demon King, although perhaps it was more accurate to say that he was so infuriated by someone hurting Lyon that he forgot how afraid he was. 

Ephraim's powerful voice boosted the morale of Eirika's army, but the Demon King met Ephraim's anger by laughing at him.

"It's not healthy to make your blood boil, prince of Renais. Don't you get it? Prince Lyon and everything about him is no more. I ate him. This body is no longer his.”

"Damn you…!" Ephraim raised his lance, and his soldiers each readied their own weapons. The archers and mages behind them also prepared themselves to support them.

But the Demon King’s spell was faster. Its waves rippled through the air, and a split second after, a horse collapsed.

Eirika looked over at them and felt fear send a chill down her spine. The neck of the fallen horse was turning in unnatural directions as if a huge, invisible hand was twisting it.

“Nosferatu…?!” Lute gasped. As someone so confident, it was entirely unlike her, but even she was panicking. “Please be careful! That is an extremely powerful dark magic. If you take a direct hit, then…!”

The army’s movements fell into chaos. The terrified horses burst out into a full gallop and tried to shake off their riders. Only Seth, Forde, and a few others managed to keep control of their horses, while the other knights all clung desperately to their horses’ necks.

The Demon King cast another spell. Another horse fell down. 

The army was in a panic trying to rush outside of the spell’s range, but among them, Eirika was doing the opposite, and pushing ahead. 

Seth and Ephraim noticed her and rushed over to her, flustered. They stood behind her, ready to protect her, as she faced the Demon King.

His expression changed, sharp eyes narrowing in satisfaction.

Eirika tightened her grip around her horse's reins. Her horse stopped shaking, the strength of her resolve seeming to communicate with her mount.

"Can you hear me, Lyon?" Eirika said and stared straight into the Demon King's eyes. 

"It's useless!!" Ephraim shouted and tried to stop her, but she paid him no mind and continued.

"You're in there, aren't you, Lyon? Please do not abandon hope. We will defeat the Demon King and save you… so please, don't give in…"

The Demon King's expression shook ever so slightly. He furrowed his brow and glared at Eirika. "Pitiful girl… You still believe that there is any of Lyon's heart within this body? How fascinating. Then come here. I will tear you apart limb from limb with these very hands…"

"Get away from him, Eirika!" Ephraim shouted and kicked his horse's side. Seth followed after him a second later.

Ephraim thrust his lance with a sharp battle cry. The Demon King narrowly dodged a fatal blow, but blood sprayed out from his shoulder. Seth followed up without a moment's delay, thrusting his own lance. 

The Demon King flailed his arm around wildly, but there was no power in his movements.

"Support Ephraim! Archers, step forward!" Innes ordered, and swiftly shot an arrow of his own. 

His silver arrow pierced deep into the Demon King's chest.

'Stop!' Eirika tried to scream. 'If you kill him, then Lyon's heart will die, too!!'

The Demon King staggered, but his eyes did not lose the intensity within them. "This little is too much…? The human body is so frail." He muttered in annoyance and pulled the arrow out of his chest. Blood flowed from the wound. 

He glared at Eirika with eyes burning like a blazing fire. "I have learned the extent of your power. In this case… I will hasten my resurrection. I will abandon this frail body and return to my true flesh. That is the day when this continent will once again be shrouded in darkness. There is no longer a single place any of you can run to!” He said in a tone not unlike that of one giving a curse, and disappeared.

Ephraim yelled at him, “You’re running away?! Do you really think I’ll let you desecrate Lyon’s body ever again…?!”

Ephraim ordered the soldiers to search the area and turned back towards Eirika. “Are you alright, Eirika?”

“Yes…”

"Don't do anything reckless. You know he's not Lyon. The Lyon we were friends with is already…"

"Brother, I want to believe him. The Demon King says what he does, but Lyon's heart is still alive… he's suffering and waiting for us to save him. I can feel it." Ephraim furrowed his brow. His blue eyes clouded over with hesitation.

He was still suffering, too. Just like she was.

He sighed deeply. "...I understand. Right now, finding him comes first. Eirika, you rest for a bit."

"No, I'm going to search too…"

"Your face is terribly pale. You've pushed yourself past your limit. L'Arachel, could you please take care of her?"

L'Arachel was standing near him, so he called her over. 

Eirika went into a tent with L'Arachel, deciding that she would take a short rest.

ー

[mythicalcanary-literature]

FanFiction - Crossing the Stars

Hetalia (c) Hidekaz Himaruya

FTL: Faster Than Light (c) Subset Games

[CHAPTER LIST]

Author’s Note: This FanFiction is a crossover between the sci-fi strategy game ‘FTL: Faster Than Light’ by Subset Games and the manga/anime called ‘Hetalia’ by Hidekaz Himaruya. The story will follow closely to the events of the rougue-like gameplay in FTL and the human characters will be replaced with the human versions of the national personifications in ‘Hetalia’. This is a fun personal project and it requires no knowledge of either fandom to enjoy this story. I’d encourage checking the original sources out though! Use of screenshots in this FanFiction are to supplement the storytelling to help plot the course of our heroes’ journey in the universe. Whatever the outcome of the gameplay I base this story on (as each playthrough is very unique) will be translated into the plot of this story. i.e. If the spaceship gets damaged, it gets damaged in the story. If a character dies in the game, they’re dead in this fiction. (Please note that I find this kind of storytelling entertaining to play/write and I plan to do more in the future if time allows!)

Chapter 1

The Federation was struggling with the advancing Rebel fleet. One lone ship carried some vital information that could turn the tides of the war and the Federation allied Star Ship APH was going to be their champion.

At the helm was Captain Alfred Jones, a spry young American whom fit the Golden Boy persona to a tee. Sure, he wore square-rimmed glasses but he was still awesome. Don’t let his cute blue-eyed, blond haired, ripped body mislead you! He had the courage to lead his crew to the very end. He was the youngest of his crew and had a Hero Complex but his heart helped him to make some decent moral choices.  His friends might disagree and say that his Hero Complex leads to some very immoral choices, but how could he be wrong? He’s great!

Stationed at weapons was his best friend from the academy called Arthur Kirkland. He was an officer from England and was keen to aid in an international project. Arthur was rather lean in build with messy blond hair that matched his sassy personality. His piercing emerald eyes held a wisdom beyond his years. He was tasked with weaponry because of his strategic skills and fearless judgement. Unfortunately his friends and colleagues often made fun of him for his bushy eyebrows, apparent inability to cook, and his obsession with the occult.

Last but not least was the Frenchman Francis Bonnefoy, a flamboyant friend of Arthur’s and on-and-off enemy of his. Much like Alfred, don’t let his looks fool you! Francis’ long, golden hair, sea blue eyes and wispy blond beard could charm many but he was a calculated thinker. He graduated with flying colours in engineering, which is why he was manning the FTL (Faster Than Light) Drive in the engine room.

The blond trio were in their twenties, young and wise together. If they could avoid their normal bickering maybe they would survive this after all!

“This is the awesome Captain Jones speakin’! Get your butts over to the Bridge, we need to figure out where we’re goin’,” the voice on the PA system called in a chirpy American accent.

“We’re already here, dipshit,” Arthur countered as he and Francis joined him on deck. “We’ve best be quick about this, the Rebel fleet is gaining speed.” He pulled up the Beacon Map on screen and surveyed their options. “Unfortunately we have no data on the properties of each beacon towards the exit into the next sector, but hopefully we can acquire that as we go along. The faster we get to the exit the better, our mission is too important to mess around.”

Alfred was sipping some coffee. “Psh, who’s messin’? I won’t lead you dudes astray! Hero’s promise!”

Francis sighed. “Let’s avoid battles if we can, ze stress gives me wrinkles.”

“We’re in a civilian sector! How bad could it be?”

Arthur glared at him. “You’ve best be joking. This area will be littered with Rebel scouts. We need to get a move on.”

Alfred dumped his coffee cup in the rubbish bin and winked. “Fine. Back to your stations! Off to our first stop! Warp us there, Francis!”

“Aye, sir,” Francis responded as they all returned to their posts.

The S.S. APH warped to the next beacon. If they were expecting a calming tour of space they were greatly mistaken. Alfred’s voice carried over the announcement system. “Hey, y’all! We have a hostile Rebel Scout attacking a small refuelling outpost here. That’s totes uncool so we’re gonna kick their asses! Kirkland, fire up the weapons! Try out our Burst Laser II on their weapons!”

“Aye, Captain! Locked on and charging.”

The small ship was quick with a laser drone circling the S.S. APH. An alert blared. “Shields took a hit!” Alfred informed them quickly. “Just an ion blast, it’ll be back online soon, stay at your posts!”

Francis’ voice joined him on the announcement channel. “The drone knocked out our door controls!”

“That’s alright, I destroyed their weapons room,” Arthur chipped in confidently.

“Good work, Artie!” Alfred cheered. “Lock on the drones now.”

“Roger that!”

The ship shook and Alfred’s voice called out in concern. “Yo, Francis? Are you okay? The shields are back online but it says the engines got hit.”

“I’m fine, mon ami! Minor damage to ze FTL Drive, I’m working on a fix. I’m not hurt.”

Arthur switched focus from the enemy drones to the helm. He cursed as he saw that the interior scan of the enemy vessel had repaired their weapons in the time his lasers charged. Luckily, his final few attacks took out the scout and they could safely proceed. He sighed with relief. “Danger has passed, let’s pull in the loot.”

Alfred congratulated them over the announcement system. “Well done, dudes! Artie, join me in the door room. We’re not moving on until that system is running again.”

“On my way!”

Francis kept an eye on the FTL charge as his friends repaired the door functions.

Arthur hummed as he replaced some fried wires and Alfred ran the diagnostics. Oddly enough, they didn’t chat the entire time. It was nice working together. “Alright, let’s get back to our posts. Who knows how many of these automated ships are lurking?”

“Just don’t lead us into a black hole or something.”

“Hahahaha! Noted.”

Back on the Bridge, Alfred pulled up his upgrades panel. They had enough scrap to give them a new edge. He grinned as he added an extra unit of power to their reactor and instructed the Frenchman to monitor the upgrade. He also treated himself to a more slick piloting upgrade. Having auto pilot help him to dodge attacks with a fifty percent advantage was too amazing to pass up! “I’m gonna jump to the next beacon. Hold on to your asses!”

The crew warped into the aftermath of a battle. The battlefield was littered with debris from Federation ships and Rebels alike. Their allies had been sadly outnumbered but it was clear they fought valiantly and Captain Jones respected that. He began performing a more detailed scan of the wreckage when his sensors picked up an enemy ship. He gasped and switched on the comms. “To battle stations! We have a Rebel Disrupter in our vicinity!”

The orange spaceship faced the S.S. APH head-on and momentarily knocked out the shields, just in time for the orbiting drone to shoot their door systems.

“Why do they always target our doors?” Francis complained over the communications system. “It’s hardly a vital system.”

“I think it was potluck,” Arthur answered as his return fire knocked out the enemy weapons. “Got the weapons room! I’m going to knock out that drone and then alternate. I wouldn’t put it past them to begin repairs.”

“As you are, Kirkland!” Alfred chimed in as he kept an eye on the enemy movements from the helm. They made quick work of this battle and reaped the rewards. “Good job. You know the drill, Artie. Gotta get those door systems online again. Meet me there.”

“Aye, sir!”

The next beacon jump was nothing special. Beautiful, but nothing interesting. Francis stared out of his nearby airlock windows to view the dancing binary star before they warped to the next point.

“I’m gonna do a triangular-shaped loop here, dudes. I detect a merchant nearby and I wanna see what they have,” Captain Jones announced to his crew.

“Don’t let us get caught by the Rebels, Alfred!” Arthur’s voice warned him.

“They’re not close enough yet. We’ll be fine. We can’t risk running low on supplies and if we can get this hull fixed that would be great.”

“Good point. Carry on.”

The next jump led them to a destroyed space station. Alfred had reservations about this as life signs could be detected onboard. He bit his lip and weighed up the options of investigating. On the one hand, if he could recruit a new member that would be useful! Although he was well aware that doing these kind of investigations could risk damage to his current crew’s lives. After a moment of hesitation he decided not to risk his friends. They collected miscellaneous debris to repurpose for their own mission and jumped them to the next beacon.

The crew assembled on the Bridge to witness the hails of a Rock Scout. The Rockmen were a powerful race but these aliens seemed to be relatively friendly. “Hey, this is Captain Alfred F. Jones of the Federation Star Ship APH. How can we be of service today, my dudes?”

Arthur stared at his friend unhappily. “You could use proper English, idiot. Did you learn nothing from etiquette lessons when dealing with foreign entities?”

“There was nothin’ wrong with my lingo, Artie! Don’t make me pull rank.”

“Insufferable git.”

The Rockman Captain simply stared at these weird humans before gaining their attention. “We could really use some help.”

Alfred saluted. “How can we help?”

“Our FTL navigation system is shot. Can you help us to a nearby station for them to patch us up?”

“Sure thing, rock friend! I’m receiving your fuel down payment right now and I’ll key in the co-ordinates you sent.”

“Thank you. We will be one step behind you, following your jump signatures.”

Francis beamed at his Captain as their communications shut off with their neutral acquaintance. “That was very kind of you, Alfred!”

The American beamed. “If we can help anyone in distress on the way we damn well will! We’re still gonna do our planned route unless we’re forced to change direction, but those Rebel scumbags ain’t gonna take all of us down.”

Francis patted him on the back and returned to his post. Arthur shook his head. “I wish you’d let me deal with the foreign comms once in a while, Alfred, but you did well. I’m heading back to weapons. Try to get our hull fixed at the shop.”

The next jump led them to an outpost that certainly had merchants selling some wares! Arthur and Francis volunteered to be the away party as Alfred kept an eye on the advancing enemy fleet from the Bridge. Their tailing Rockmen friends also spent a bit of time gathering resources for the journey ahead.

Aware of the encroaching danger and their limited supply of scrap to trade for goods, the European representatives agreed that they should spend all of it on an Advanced FTL Navigation Augmentation that would allow them to leap to any previously visited beacon in one hop no matter the distance and the rest of the scrap was allocated to hull repairs. They promptly beamed back on deck and installed their new augment and checked with the Rockmen to make sure that they were ready to follow.

The S.S. APH jumped back the way they came and immediately leapt to the subsequent beacon. It was a tough decision because they had to completely ignore a distress call. The Rebel fleet was advancing far too quickly, they had to put as much distance between them as possible. Alfred felt terrible but his crew and the Rockmen following them depended on forward thinking. There was no helping those in distress right now.

“Rebel transport ship detected!” Captain Jones announced on the communications system. “It doesn’t seem to wanna fight but we can’t take risks. Plus we need the scrap, we’re kinda poor right now.”

“Engaging weapons, Captain!” Arthur replied, powering up the Burst Laser II to lock onto their weapons room. He was going to target the drones next as those little bastards were a pain to deal with.

“CANCEL THAT INTERACTION, KIRKLAND! ATTACK THEIR ENGINES, THEY’RE GONNA JUMP AND WARN THE FLEET!”

“Fuck, really?! Alright, locking both the lasers and missiles onto their FTL Drive!”

It was a tense moment as their weapons warmed up and as they celebrated decimating the enemy FTL Drive, a missile hit their own engines.

“ENGINES, DAMAGE REPORT!” Captain Jones cried.

“Ze bastards damaged ze FTL Drive. I’m working on a fix but my head…”

“Focus, Bonnefoy. You can heal after we destroy these idiots!” Arthur chipped in urgently. He switched the lasers to focus on the Rebel weapons room whilst keeping their Artemis missile locked on the enemy engines.

An explosion rocked the Bridge and Alfred coughed through the smoke. “Dammit, they’re breaking my controls. Kirkland, finish this now.” He gritted his teeth as he repaired the system damage. His wrist was pretty sore but nothing too dire.

“Aye, Captain!”

Fortunately, the battle was over with soon after and repairs could be finished to both the engines and the piloting systems. Jones and Bonnefoy met up in the medbay to heal their injuries before moving on. It was becoming clear how dangerous this mission was.

Back on the Bridge, Alfred instructed his crew that to get to the quest marker they needed to enter a nebula. Nebula zones were always risky as they knocked out sensors but they could also be beneficial in slowing down the enemy fleet. “We’re heading to the nebula. Be prepared for anything! Warp ahead, Bonnefoy!”

This felt like a mistake. Nebulas can be rather peaceful but today was not their day! A plasma storm was active so not only were their sensors dead but their reactor was crippled to half-capacity. The crew was in a mild panic trying to figure out what systems were down as a Rebel automated scout swooped in to cause them hell.

“GUYS, WE HAVE A PROBLEM. SEVERAL PROBLEMS,” Alfred yelled through the communications system.

“No shit!” Arthur shot back as he examined the diagnostics from his post. “Our oxygen isn’t powered, we’ll suffocate!”

“Heat up the weapons, Artie, we have company! I’ll divert power from the medbay to the oxygen room!”

“SHIELDS ARE DOWN AND THEY HAVE A DRONE!” Francis cried from the engine room. “We’re sitting ducks!”

“Divert ALL power from engines to the shields NOW!”

“Aye!”

“I’m locked on their weapons, Captain!” Arthur informed them. “The shield is holding off the drone, thank God.”

“Fire on that and then the drone. Destroy it as quickly as possible.”

“Thanks, Captain Obvious.”

Thankfully the battle was over swiftly. Shaken and worried, Alfred gave the order to drop the shields and restore power to the FTL Drive. They would drop off their Rockmen friends at the next beacon and make their way to the exit.

“Approaching the quest marker,” Captain Jones announced keeping the ship steady, ready for a break. “I’ll inform our little convoy back there.”

“Can one ship in addition to ours really be considered a convoy?” Francis responded contemplatively.

He didn’t receive an answer as the Rockmen’s ship zoomed away without warning and Alfred flipped the Red Alert siren. “AGH! IT’S A TRAP! How could they? We trusted them!” He turned on the power to all systems after they were clear of the plasma storm and glared at the Rebel Disrupter ship. How dare they! HOW. DARE. THEY.

Ignoring the possible melodrama his best friend was stewing in, Arthur had already locked their weapons on the Rebel weapons and drones with their Burst Laser II and the Artemis missile. DIRECT HIT! That’s getting business taken care of. He disabled the Artemis and focused the laser onto enemy shields. He needed no consultation on this strategy, they would not be made fools of! With the shields down and the enemies focused on repairing the damage he dealt to the drones, he fired once again at the weapons room. The Rebel scum would not get a say in this!

VICTORY! The crew celebrated briefly as they collected the remains of their enemy vessel.

“Let’s get the hell outta here,” Alfred urged, turning them towards the next beacon. “I don’t want to try my luck with another one of these guys.”

“We can make it to ze Exit Beacon in two jumps, Captain!” Francis informed him over the comms. “With ze Rebels gaining ground we shouldn’t take anymore detours.”

“Agreed, buddy! Full speed ahead!”

The Rebels were determined to control this star system! The subsequent beacon greeted them with another Rebel Rigger patrol. It stood between them and the exit. This could not be tolerated.

“I’m way ahead of you, Captain!” Arthur called over the communications. “I’ve locked on their weapons and drone rooms. I’ll target their FTL Drive afterwards, we can’t let them get away to inform the Rebel fleet of our location.”

“Show no mercy, Kirkland!”

“Aye, sir!”

Direct hits!

“The enemy is powering up it’s FTL Drive!” Alfred informed them urgently. “This could be bad!”

The landed hits on the enemy vessel weren’t enough to destroy the hull and the Rebels were an inch from jumping out of reach. Fortune dealt them an unexpected hand, though.

Alfred opened up the screen to receive a hail from the Rebel Rigger Captain. “Captain Jones speaking. Stop right there!”

The enemy Captain scowled but offered a metaphorical white flag. “The day is yours! Show us your honour by allowing us to leave with our lives.”

This was a very fragile situation. The enemy hull was weak but their FTL Drive was primed to jump any second. There would be no time to stop them unless they agreed to a truce. Alfred growled in frustration but knew there was no choice. “Kirkland, cease fire! We’re entering a truce.”

“What? Um, okay?” came Arthur’s puzzled response. There was probably a good reason to cease fire so he complied. He would demand answers later.

Captain Jones accepted the supplies from the Rebel Rigger and the enemy did not warp away. Phew, that was a close one. The advancing enemy fleet would not gain speed on them.

Tense, Alfred called a meeting on the Bridge. He turned to his crewmates gravely. “We’re getting real lucky with these battles, our damage has been minimal. With Rebels so close to our Exit Beacon we need to be ready for a possible interception between us and the warp point. Don’t let your guard down and we’ll decide which sector to head to next once the coast is clear.”

Arthur nodded and returned to the weapons room without any answers, but he didn’t need them. It was clear they were in trouble and Alfred made a solid judgement call. He would be ready to defend.

Francis remained by Alfred’s side as they made the final jump to the Exit Beacon.

There was an asteroid field not far from their destination. They decided to risk navigating it for some materials that would help them in the next sector. Luck truly was not on their side as asteroids violently knocked down their shields and damaged their hull!

“Fire in ze portside airlocks, Captain!” Francis cried.

“I’ll open the airlocks to extinguish it. Everyone meet me in shields! We’ll repair and move on!”

Once that crisis was averted, the crew met up to decide where to go next.

Would they jump to the Engi Controlled area, or the Zoltan Controlled area? Both were civilian sectors but carried their own unique risks.

TO BE CONTINUED IN THE NEXT SECTOR...

Chapter 1 - END

[CHAPTER LIST]

----------------

[Cover Art] This image was drawn in HB pencil and painted in watercolour paints on the 8th August 2021. It was digitally enhanced in GIMP Image Editor on the 9th August 2021. Paper type = 130 gsm 

This chapter was written on the 8th August 2021.

----------------

Please do not repost, modify, resell or claim this work as your own.

(Reblogging is fine, though!)

[Mythical Canary Info]

[talkfastromance4]

Against All Odds--Calum Hood (part IV soulmate!au)

Copyright talkfastromance4 © All works is intellectual property of the author. All rights reserved. Any redistribution or reproduction or any part or all contents in any form is prohibited. You may not, without written expression and consent from the author, distribute works amongst other social media platforms

Word count: 7.2k

Warnings: car accident, coma, stitches, an attempt at medical jargon, I did research but am in no way a doctor so if there’s fallacies, that’s why. I tried my best.

Song inspirations: move to you-jagwartwin; falling-tyler daniel; hesitate-the jonas brothers; falling-harry styles; stars in your eyes-ronnie hilton; want you back-5sos; what happens here-ASL; where will i remember you-ASL; all i want-kodaline

donate to my ko-fi here :)

Masterlist

The Click || Measured in Moments || Fractures catch up on previous parts here!

Enjoy! Feedback is always welcome :)

• • • •

Calum hears rain. He feels it as well, but it doesn’t feel like normal raindrops. His entire body hurts, but the pain is more intense in his head and in his chest. It’s as if he’s on fire with a thousand-ton weight on his head and heart. Voices float in and out of his ears, he tries to decipher the words and their meaning, but his main concern is to control his breathing.

When the pain becomes too much in his head, he forces himself to open his eyes. They’re heavy but he pushes through and blinks a few times until he sees Ashton and Ruby’s faces near his.

“Oh, thank God,” Ashton exhales dropping his head, “you scared the shit outta me.”

Calum tries to sit up but Ruby pushes onto his shoulders.

“Take it easy, Cal,” she says, her voice small, “you’ve been in and out for the past ten minutes.” The honey color in her brown eyes are brighter than usual. “What happened?”

“Where’s Rose? Something’s wrong… she’s… where is she?” Calum demands trying to sit up again, but Ashton is the one to keep him on the floor.

“Take it easy,” Ashton repeats what Ruby said, “you’ve been murmuring her name. Why do you think something’s wrong?”

“I felt it. I can…” Calum’s eyes search down his body frantically, “I feel it everywhere. I need to get to her, I need to—”

His ringtone he has set up for Rose blares from his pocket and he’s quick to pull it out. He slides his finger over the screen to answer it but before he can say a word, a man’s voice comes through.

“Is this Calum Hood?” the unfamiliar voice asks.

“Yes, who is this?” Calum sits up and swats Ashton’s hands away so he can stand up slowly. Ruby holds onto his arms for support, which he’s thankful for. He got a head rush from standing.

“This is Officer Mathers, um… your girlfriend—”

“Fiancée.”

“…Your fiancée was in a collision just now. When we arrived on scene, she was slightly coherent and kept saying your name… Can you come to the county hospital?” Officer Mathers asks.

Like a tidal wave, Calum nearly collapses again, but Ashton has a strong grip on him and keeps him upright. Ashton can see the fear in Calum’s eyes.

“We need to go to the hospital,” Calum whispers.

***

Calum tries to placate and identify every emotion coursing through his body. His whole body is wired, he’s rubbing his hands together in anxious anticipation while his leg shakes impatiently. His eyes are focused on the cracks in the tiled floor, he’s focusing on his breathing and trying not to let the heavy pain in his chest overtake him.

Ashton and Ruby sit on either side of him, they gave up trying to console him as soon as they sat down in the waiting area. Officer Mathers, the one Calum spoke to, was waiting for them at the Emergency Room entrance, a solemn expression on his face as he explained the accident.

Rose was at a four way stop just as the storm started and when she pulled forward, another car came speeding through the stop sign hitting the front end of her car. She went into a tailspin and the force of it overturned the car. When squad cars, the fire department and the ambulance showed up the car that hit her was already gone but a witness getting their groceries from their driveway who made the call saw the whole accident happen.

It took all of ten minutes to break her free from the vehicle—which was how long Calum blacked out—and when she was placed on a stretcher that’s when she started saying his name, almost like a mantra. Officer Mathers took her phone that was still somehow clutched in her hand and found his number just as she was wheeled into the back of the ambulance.

A nurse came by after the officer left and escorted Calum, Ashton and Ruby to the waiting area. Calum badgered her for questions on where Rose was, if she was okay; but the nurse didn’t have that information.

His mind races while he sits and waits. It’s been hours since they arrived, he doesn’t even want to know what time it is. Every minute of not knowing what’s happening with Rose seems like a lifetime. His heart is beating as fast as a hummingbird’s wings, he’s filled with adrenaline. He’s not sure if he wants to pace or sit here with his racing thoughts. He’s equally tired as he is wired, and he checks the glow in his chest every few minutes.

It hasn’t gone back to that dark orange, it’s as if he lost the part of Rose that helped complete him.

“I should have been with her,” he mumbles. Ashton and Ruby turn to him, their fingers are interlocked, and, in that moment, Calum is jealous of them. They have the comfort of their perfect counterpart, Calum’s never felt more alone.

“You can’t blame yourself, Cal,” Ashton tries to reason but Calum doesn’t want to hear it.

Not being able to handle sitting much longer, he rises from his chair and begins to pace. His head is still throbbing all around, so he tries to release the tension in his back by placing both hands on his neck. His fingers knead and rub the tight muscles but to no avail, his mind is still racing, and his heart is aching.

Calum.

He spins around abruptly hearing Rose’s voice, but is met instead with a woman wearing an orange surgical cap.

“Are you Calum Hood? Rose’s fiancé?” the woman asks.

“Ye—” he clears his throat, lowers his hands from his neck. “Yes, I am. Is she all right? Can I go see her?”

“I’m Dr. Robbins,” she says, “When Rose arrived, she was unresponsive, so we did some scans and found bleeding in her brain. We took her into immediate surgery to alleviate the bleeding. She has a femoral shaft fracture due to the collision and our orthopedic surgeon placed plates and screws to secure the fracture and an external fixator that holds it all in place. When you see her, it will look a little scary to see the fixator. She also has a few broken ribs and she’s being moved into the ICU so we can observe her on the clock.”

Her words fumble and stumble inside his brain, Calum tries to make sense of it all.

“Can I see her? Please?” his main concern is seeing her for himself, with his own eyes to make sure she’s all right.

“As soon as she’s settled, I’ll send a nurse to bring you to her. She won’t be awake yet, but the anesthesia should wear off in an hour or two. I’ll see you then.”

“Thank you,” Ashton says.

Calum thinks he says them as well, his mouth opens but he doesn’t hear the words. When Dr. Robbins turns on her heels, shoes squeaking on the linoleum, that’s when Calum loses his balance. Ashton and Ruby grab hold of his arms to steady him and bring him back to his chair.

Thankfully, it isn’t long before a nurse retrieves them escorting the three friends down the long, brightly lit hallway. Calum’s throat is sandpaper dry, he’s not sure what to expect when he sees Rose, but he knows when he sees her eyes, he’ll be able to tell how she’s really doing which will equally appease him.

Right when they’re about to turn into the glass paneled wall, curtains are pulled to hide the room, he takes a deep breath. When he sees her, he nearly falls to his knees. His beautiful Rose lies still in the bed, her head wrapped in cloth and gauze while her face is covered in bruises and scratches. Her left leg is elevated with small rods and screws holding her leg in place; now he understands what Dr. Robbins meant about the fixator. It makes her leg look bionic and very unnatural compared to her natural beauty.

His feet feel like lead as he steps forward moving against the curtain. Machines are beeping, while tubes, wires, and IV’s protrude from her chest and arms. When he reaches the side of her bed, he collapses into the chair placed next to it. His brown eyes are sad as he looks her over, his beautiful Rose. Carefully, he touches her hand and when he sees her ring still on her left finger, that’s what breaks him.

“Oh, Rosie,” he sighs letting his head fall onto the back of his arm. He kisses her fingers delicately, making sure not to jostle her too much. She smells like hospital, sterile and clean but he can faintly make out her distinct rose and rainwater smell.

He doesn’t notice Ashton and Ruby shuffle in and occupy the other chairs across the room. He holds her hand tightly in comfort, almost willing that he could somehow take her pain away. He’d rather it be him in the bed than her.

He doesn’t notice a nurse come in until he feels movement on the bed, and he sits up in a flash.

“Checking her vitals and numbers,” the nurse smiles as he eyes the monitors.

Calum watches him sullenly as he checks her breathing, and notices how he makes a face as he shines a small flashlight in her eyes.

“I’ll be right back.”

“What’s wrong?” Calum asks but the nurse is gone. “What’s wrong?!” he looks to Ashton and Ruby who shake their heads in confusion as well.

Dr. Robbins comes bustling in, bringing her own small light to Rose’s eyes, flicking it over as she opened her lids.

“Rose? Rose, can you hear me? I’m Dr. Robbins and you’re at the County Hospital. Rose,” she says in a cool affirmative voice.

“What’s wrong?” Calum demands, his voice hard.

“Check her blood pressure,” Dr. Robbins instructs the nurse. “Mr. Hood, I need you to wait outside.”

“What the hell is happening?” Calum roars rising to his feet. Dr. Robbins eyes him.

“I need to run a few tests on her right now, and for me to properly help her, I need you to wait outside for me, okay? Right outside the door,” Dr. Robbins speaks to him as if he’s a child but it’s not in a condescending way.

“C’mon, mate, let’s go outside,” Ashton says suddenly next to him.

Calum holds onto Rose’s hand as long as he can, his eyes never leaving her face until the curtains are pulled around her bed. Closing Calum off from her again. He hears medical jargon through the thin piece of fabric. He waits, he listens, he watches the glow in his chest flicker.

Five minutes later, Dr. Robbins pulls them aside.

“Rose has a traumatic brain injury and I believe that is what has her in a comatose state,” Dr. Robbins tells him, Ashton, and Ruby. “The impact of the other car caused severe trauma and her body is trying to heal itself in this way.”

“Will she wake up?” Ashton asks.

“It’s hard to say at this stage, statistics show—”

“I don’t want to hear the statistics. She’s going to wake up, what can we do to help her?” Calum asks with not even an ounce of doubt.

“Keep her as comfortable as possible, it’s a good sign she’s breathing on her own but we’ll set her up with a feeding tube so she can still get the nutrients that she needs. We’ll continue to monitor, do routine coma tests and make sure that her leg is healing properly.”

“Let’s do that, then,” Calum nods and moves to go back to her room. He looks back at Dr. Robbins, Ashton, and Ruby. The look they’re giving him is full of sadness. “She’s going to wake up.”

Two Weeks Later

Calum has been at the hospital day and night with Rose. Unwilling to leave her until she wakes up, the staff have brought in a bed for him to sleep in and placed it right next to hers. The first few days were the hardest, Calum was still in shock and trying to process all that’s happened. The guys stayed with him in rotation until it was well past visiting hours. The nights were the hardest, Calum ached to lay next to her and hear her true heartbeat rather than the beeps of the monitor.

As the days went by, her hospital room became like their own little one room apartment. Ashton and Ruby were kind enough to bring their pillows and blankets, clothes for Calum to change in and out of, their poetry books and record player paired with their favorite records.

Michael and Crystal have taken in Duke and Honey until Calum and Rose can return home. He wishes he could bring the dogs in so that their presence would somehow breakthrough to Rose, but the hospital wouldn’t allow it in case they bumped her leg or tugged on the multiple wires and tubes she’s connected to.

Calum also had flower arrangements delivered so the whole room was vibrant and floral smelling. He made sure they were always roses, hoping it would pull his Rose back to him. They also brought a little bit of light in here; it’s been raining for the last three weeks. He never lets one of them wilt, if it looks like it’s starting to brown he orders a new arrangement. He doesn’t want any form of death happening in this room.

The TV is on low volume when Jane, Rose’s primary RN whisks inside.

“How’s our girl doing today?” Jane asks brightly. She appears next to Rose checking her tubes, stitches, IV drip and her leg.

“Okay I think. I think I’m going to try reading her some poetry again,” Calum says stroking the back of Rose’s hand with his fingers.

“I think your love story is so sweet,” Jane smiles poking the earpieces of her stethoscope in her ears. She nods to his guitar leaning against the window. “I haven’t heard you play that yet.”

Calum glances at the instrument that Luke brought over for him one day in the first week of Rose being admitted. Luke told him music is what brought him and his soulmate together, and the love Calum and Rose also shared of music was bound to ignite something within her.

“I don’t really want to play the melodies that are in my head,” Calum says picking up a poetry book that’s on the makeshift nightstand next to his cot bed. It’s a hospital table-top cart that holds his and Rose’s notebooks along with their poetry books. He shuffles through the pages, inked words flashing by quickly. “They’re all sad and I don’t want her to feel that.”

Jane nods tucking Rose’s plush periwinkle blanket back into place, so she stays warm.

“I understand. Everything looks good, I’ll be back in a few hours. Don’t forget to eat, Calum,” Jane reminds him with a pointed look.

“Thanks Jane,” Calum tries to give her a grin, but he can feel it’s more of a grimace. Jane walks back out of the room closing the door behind her and Calum sighs staring at Rose. “Should I read some poems to you, Rosie?”

The page he landed on was of a poem titled Bloom,

‘Someone once planted your name

like a seed in my heart.

Only now I’ve met you,

Do I know what it means to bloom.’

And below the printed words are Rose’s own, handwritten in her beautiful cursive. Calum traces the written words with a longing he knows will never go away. It reads:

Calum and I said ‘I love you’ to each other. Not many soulmates do that but after that night with the storm when we had sex for the first time…it felt right. Like my world finally clicked into place. I’ve read about love, seen it with my own eyes from friends and family but to feel it? Love is such a strong word, since we’ve both said it I feel it blooming within me. When I say his name it grows, when he says mine it doubles, and when we exchange ‘I love you’ it triples.

Calum remembers that night perfectly. The provocative prose he read to her lead to their lovemaking while the storm rumbled on outside. It mirrored the storm within him at wanting to declare his love to her, but he kept it inside in fear of losing her. He knew he loved her the first time they kissed up in her apartment, that this was everything he’s ever wanted. Rose is the muse he’s been writing and singing about for all these years.

A loud roar of thunder shook outside, and Calum glances out the rain streaked window as lightning flashes across the sky. It’s as if the universe knows his soulmate is in turmoil because the rain hasn’t let up at all. Glancing back at Rose, he hopes wherever she is that it’s sunshine and happy memories.

He closes the book then moves to the record player in the corner of the room. Their favorite record is already placed inside, and he turns it on. Frank Sinatra’s voice fills the room as he sings about the moon. Calum inspects the flowers making sure they all have their vibrant color before sitting back down on his cot.

He picks up his Michael Faudet book and reads Chasing Love out loud to her. When he’s finished, he stares at this poem for a long time as Frank’s voice ricochets off the walls. The first half is a little broody, two pathways meeting but not crossing. He’s thankful his path and Rose’s crossed—crashed actually. He’s reminded of the ghostly dream he had of this phantom woman a few years ago that teased him of knowing him in his ear. Turns out it was her all along.

The last line pulls at his heart ‘how sunshine steals from autumn frost.’ What a conundrum because his sunshine was stolen from him. Instead of frost and snow the sun was replaced with the rain and thunder brewing relentlessly outside.

He looks at his Rose, frozen in sleep, and he’s desperate for her to return to him. his throat works as he realizes how too close their situation resembles to the fairy tale of Sleeping Beauty. His sweet, sweet Rose in a deep slumber.

Calum traces the area of the diamond on her finger. It’s become a bit loose and he takes in her appearance for the thousandth time. Her complexion is dry and thin compared to her usual warmth and softness. She’s void of color and abundance. Like the other times before when he’s felt her anger or her sadness, he tries to place what she’s feeling now but comes up blank. There’s a faint buzzing and a very distant lilt of music, but that’s all he can gather.

The red glow is dim but still there, so that has to be a good sign. Calum scoots closer and with careful fingers touches her hair that is also less in color and dry. Some of it is growing back in baby tufts around her stitches. He caresses her cheek; her skin is lukewarm. On a normal day, this action would have made her cheeks heat up in a light pink pigment, but they remain the same pallor.

“Come back to me, Rosie,” he whispers anxiously. He curls her cool, limp fingers in his. “I love you so much.”

On instinct, he glances back to her chest, the red glow is still the weak glimmer but it’s that little bit of light that urges his hope to press on. She will wake again.

Four Weeks Later

Ashton is sitting with him today like he has been every Monday and Wednesday prior. The record player plays absently in the background and Ashton watches his best friend cling to the love of his life. Their talk is minimal, the weather has been the same onslaught of rain so that’s always out. After Calum informs him of Rose’s condition it goes silent between them.

When the record stops Calum shifts to that part of the room and grabs their album placing it on the B side of the vinyl. He feels Ashton’s gaze on him the whole time.

“Lover of mine is her favorite,” Calum grins then sits back down next to her bed. He’s hoping the music will awaken her at some point. He has to find the right song.

“I hate seeing you like this, mate,” Ashton finally admits. “You’re wasting away being cooped up in here.”

“I’m staying until she wakes up.”

“You have to start thinking of the possibility that she might not…” Ashton’s voice tapers off morosely. Calum’s eyes flash in white hot fury.

“She’s going to wake up,” Calum says firmly. “She’s in there. She can hear me and I…I feel her.” He flicks his eyes back to her then takes her hand.

A few days ago, while he was reading to her, the buzzing he always heard quieted and the musical melody became louder.

“How?”

Calum hesitates, his thumb rubs the back of her hand. “We love each other,” he confesses and Ashton gasps. “And since we’ve said it we’ve had a…a connection. It’s a warmth and a-a glow in our chests and somehow it combined into one. She still has her glow and I have mine.”

“When—why didn’t you tell me?”

“It’s hard to explain and I know it’s not common for soulmates to say it to each other, because there isn’t really a need to but…I didn’t want you to think I was crazy.”

“I’d never think that. That’s incredible, man.”

They fall into a silence again. Ashton is still wrestling with the idea that even though Calum feels her, who knows how long it will be until she does wake up? He wants to be supportive of his friend, his brother, but it’s hard when he can see how harrowing this is for him.

He’s been stuck in this hotel for four weeks now, eating hospital food and never leaving. Calum has lost weight and he has dark circles under his eyes that never seem to go away. The similarities between Rose and Calum’s appearances is frightening but also adds truth to how Calum says he ‘feels’ her. Is he going through what Rose is?

Ruby arrives about an hour later with some take out food, her curls are dewed with droplets of the rain and her face falls when she catches sight of Rose and Calum. She looks to Ashton who nods; the two of them have discussed trying to get Calum to go home for a bit and today seems like a good time to do that.

“Hey Cal,” she greets him brightly setting the food bags on the table under the tv.

“Hey Rube,” he replies quietly, eyes never straying from Rose.

“What do you say about going home for a few hours?” She rubs her hands together trying to warm up from the cold rain. “Ash and I can stay here so you can shower and do some laundry.”

Calum turns to her stiffly, his brown eyes flat.

“I’m not leaving her, Ruby.”

“It’d only be for an hour or two,” she presses moving to the other side of Rose’s bed. She gazes at her own best friend, sadness welling up in her heart. “You don’t have to spend the night but just to stretch your legs, get a change of scenery.”

Calum licks his chapped lips, the thought of showering in his own bathroom is tempting. The one here gets the job done but he can feel the difference in comfort. He does have a pile of clothes in the corner that should be washed but the thought of leaving Rose tugs at his heart.

“What if something happens?”

“You know we’ll call you,” Ashton chimes in. “Rose would want you to take care of yourself, too.”

After careful thought he agrees, gathers his clothes then kisses Rose’s forehead. It’s clammy and each step away from her makes him feel horrible. It rises a panic in him he’s never felt before and it only increases when he gets in his car. The rain is a horrible reminder of the night of her accident when his world flipped upside down.

He’s anxious the whole car ride, it’s weird being in a vehicle after four weeks of staying in one place. He makes sure to keep both hands on the wheel as he drives not wanting to risk getting into an accident himself.

When he arrives home it’s dark and quiet without the welcoming of the dogs’ claws on the floor. He misses them and wants to see them at Mike’s house but that would make him be away from Rose longer and he couldn’t have that. Maybe he’ll go over there in a day or two.

The silence is deafening as he walks down the hall. He pauses at the Eiffel tower photos on the wall and gazes at each photo. Rose’s smile and the light in her eyes brings him both comfort and pain. Being home and out of the hospital makes him truly feel the huge weight on his shoulders

He tosses his clothes in the washer and pours in the desired amount of detergent. He selects a setting without reading it but sees it’s only for forty minutes. Good, the faster he can get back to the hospital the better.

Once inside the bathroom—he makes sure to avoid looking at their bed—he connects his phone to the Bluetooth speaker in the fan. Calum’s body feels heavier as he removes his clothes slowly, his arms like lead and his muscles throb.

He stands under the hot spray of water, breathing in the steam and letting it smooth out his strained muscles in his neck and shoulders. Memories of showers spent with Rose flood his mind. He always loved the way she’d stand behind him with her hands sliding up his chest as she kissed the space between his shoulder blades.

What he would give to have her behind him right now. If only he didn’t have to be at the venue early to set up for the show Rose would have been with him. She wouldn’t have had to drive by herself, she wouldn’t have been at that intersection and she wouldn’t be in the hospital right now.

The song changes and the all too familiar lyrics ‘remember the words you told me love me ‘til the day I die’ pierced Calum’s heart. His breath catches as the words sink in along with Ashton’s insinuation that she might not wake. Calum slams his palm against the wall, he continues to smack it until he feels the sharp pain shoot up his arm. He falls to the shower floor, water raining down on him as his sadness, hurt and confusion surface.

Calum feels so lost without Rose, his sobs bounce off the tile and drown out the music. He lets out a few shouts of rage to mask the song of hurt while his bleeds out. He’s not sure how long he sits on the shower floor before he cleans himself off and exits.

While he brushes his teeth, he stares at himself in the mirror barely recognizing the reflection. His cheeks have sunken in under the dark bags of his eyes. He’s so exhausted, sleeping on that cot isn’t as comfortable as his own bed. Calum replaces his wet clothes into the dryer, noting the time of an hour and a half. He shuffles back to his and Rose’s bedroom and falls onto the side that’s hers.

Her pillow still smells like her and tears well in Calum’s eyes at the all too familiar smell. He pulls the comforter over him, his eyes closing easily. He’ll just sleep until the dryer is done and he’ll be back at the hospital in two hours.

The next time Calum opens his eyes is due to a loud crack of thunder. He’s still on Rose’s side of the bed but facing the other way and his whole body feels rigid. His hand pats the bed until he finds his phone, the light makes his eyes strain and he blinks in confusion as he reads the time.

He slept for a whole day and a half. For a quick moment he forgot about the accident and thought he’d just come back from a tour. The phone drops to his chest as he rolls over to gaze at Rose but she’s not there. His small moment of bliss dissipates because he hasn’t been on tour in so long and reality sets in that Rose is back at the hospital.

He curses himself for falling asleep then stretches his limbs, the cracks of his joints are music to his ears and fill him with release. He lies in bed for a little while longer until he’s more awake then gets out slowly. His hair has dried oddly because it was wet when he dropped onto the mattress, but he doesn’t care. He has to get back to Rose.

When he arrives back at the hospital again, guilt ever present in his chest of being away from her so long, he finds there hasn’t been any change in her condition. Ashton and Ruby figured he fell asleep and were glad at how refreshed he looks. They stayed the night with Rose and he’s thankful for that but still feels awful for not sleeping next to her.

After catching up with Ashton and Ruby, they leave him with a kiss on the cheek from Ruby and a reassuring squeeze to his shoulder from Ashton. Calum kisses Rose’s forehead.

“Sorry for being away, sweetheart. Sleep took over me but I’m back now. Should I read some more to you?” he picks up a book and starts to read from Michael Faudet.

He stares at ‘The Northern Lights’ reminiscing about his and Rose’s own moment at the beach, much like what the poem is describing. He reads it out loud, twice then stares at Rose’s face.

“Remember that night at the beach, Rosie? The stars shone in your eyes and we got sand everywhere,” he smiles at the memory while Ronnie Hilton’s song ‘Stars Shine in your eyes’ plays just like that night.

It was a date night curated by Calum complete with a basket of food and a large blanket to lay in the sand. They were in a hidden spot unseen to other beachgoers with the perfect view of the ocean and the setting sun. It was twilight when he lit the candles for their dinner, feeding each other the small finger food with kisses exchanged in between each bite.

Rose pulled him to his feet so they could walk in the ocean for a little while, just until the sun disappeared below the horizon. When her feet became cold, she hopped on Calum’s back so he could carry her back to the blanket where he draped a second one over her legs while he got a fire started.

He remembers how he froze when he turned around to see her top off, a nipple peeking above the second blanket he gave her, and she flashed him the sweetest smile.

“Come warm me up?”

They created their own sunset between their hearts that night, the smell of ocean air and smoke clouded over their tangled limbs as they made love twice on the beach.

The loud ringing of his phone pulls him from the sweet reverie, he sees it’s his mom and he picks up right away. She asks if there has been any new progress with Rose and he tells her not yet and that she doesn’t have to come watch the dogs because Mike still has them. He promises he’ll call her when Rose does wake up.

He hangs up and is still thinking of the beach when he’s reminded of a poem Lang Leav wrote called ‘High Tide’. He goes to her book and reads out the first line.

“’Are you somewhere looking at the sea, my love?’ Is that where you are, Rosie? By the sea? The sand in your toes, salty seawater spraying your hair?” he chokes up as he gazes at her still face. He grabs her hand in his and kisses it. “Pick a pretty shell for me, okay? What should I read next?”

Five Weeks Later

It’s Thursday afternoon and Calum is doing the routine exercises for Rose, so she doesn’t get bed sores and her muscles don’t atrophy when Ruby enters the room. She is absolutely beaming, her eyes wide and bright accompanied with a huge smile on her face. Surprised at her elation, Calum’s first instinct is to look at her left-hand thinking Ashton proposed to her, but her hand is bare.

“Hey Rube, what’s up?” he asks bending Rose’s fingers down one by one, similar to the tactic of counting a child’s toes as little piggies.

“Ash and I said, ‘I love you.’”

“Really?!” Calum gives her a large smile then massages the palm of Rose’s hand. “That’s fantastic, how’d it happen?”

“We were making breakfast and he just said it,” she smiles breathlessly. “You and Rose were right about that warmth; I feel it everywhere…it’s like I’m floating on air.”

“That’s amazing. I’m so happy for you guys.” Calum sets Rose’s arm back down on the bed and moves down to her leg that’s not in a cast.

“We have you two to thank. Rose told me not to be scared and after what you told Ashton last week he said he’s been feeling different. I can’t wait to tell Rose.” Ruby smiles down sadly at her friend

“She’ll be happy to hear about it,” Calum smiles and lifts her leg to do the exercises. Dr. Robbins has said that her external fixator is doing a good job of healing her leg, it’s a slow process but with her current condition, slow is best.

Ruby recounts the whole moment for Calum while he continues the exercises with Rose. Ruby knew something was up because Ashton was being a bit moodier than normal and was acting nervous while they did their morning yoga session. It wasn’t until Ruby started their coffee and she asked for their two mugs did he say it after she said, ‘thank you.’

Calum knows Ashton will probably tell him about it when he comes to visit but it fills him with happiness that his two friends know of the same elation that he and Rose feel. When her exercises are done, and Jane has checked her vitals, Calum and Ruby sit down while he reads more poetry to Rose.

Before he’s about to go to sleep for the night he reads one more poem and notices all of Rose’s underlines in ‘A Letter to My Love’ starting with the word France and the rest as follows:

‘…how we pictured, but it is exactly how it was always meant to be.’

‘But building this life with you has been the grandest adventure.’

‘This is the happiest I have ever been.’

‘With you I have seen all my dreams to into fruition.’

‘All I ask now is for time with you, as much as we are allowed.’

He doesn’t like that last foreboding sentence, as if this time they’ve shared together is all they were allowed. This can’t be it for them. Then her handwriting appears on the page next to it dated the day they got engaged and of their graduation. She wrote an entry.

It’s the day after and Calum is sleeping next to me. He asked me to marry him! I woke up and opened to this poem, fate has been on m side since that day we bumped into each other outside the CBS. He’s my dream I’ve dreamt of since I was a little girl. There are many great loves, but non are greater than mine and his. I felt a flicker in my glow just now…excitement? You’re starting to mumble in your sleep my love, time to wake you up and celebrate our life of forever.

Calum stares at her phrase of ‘flicker in my glow’ did she somehow know about the accident before it even happened? Why else would it flicker? He shifts his gaze to her chest and the red glow is still there, still faint, but no sign of flickering.

Six Weeks Later

Calum is dreaming. Somewhere in his mind, he knows it but won’t wake. He and Rose are at the Dainty Dove. She’s leaning against him in their regular booth with his arm around her shoulders as they share a cup of coffee. She smiles like her familiar rose and rainwater smell; Moonlight Serenade by Frank Sinatra plays softly in the background from the jukebox. Their song from their very first date and they’re the only ones in the joint.

“It’s almost time,” she says twisting her fingers with his.

“Time for what?” he kisses her hair, breathing her in.

“The rain…it’s coming here. I am too.”

“What do you mean?”

“Come dance,” she whispers and then suddenly they’re dancing.

The room darkens as clouds roll over outside the restaurant. Calum watches over Rose’s head through the windows in confusion. Rose touches his cheek and he looks down at her.

“Promise me something,” she says.

“Anything.”

“Be patient with me. The rain is coming,” she whispers, and his dream self is befuddled as she leans up on her toes, lips brushing his, “and I’m in close proximity.”

Just before her lips touch his, the rain falls heavily, and her voice lingers in his mind when he wakes up. Just like in his dream, the rain is hitting the windows harshly much like it has been for the last six weeks. The weatherman are calling it an unnatural weather phenomenon and have no real answer for the source of all the rain.

He checks that the time is 4:37 a.m. He rubs his eyes then jerks to a sitting position because Rose’s chest is glowing a burning red with much more strength. It isn’t dim at all, it’s vibrant and strong.

“Rose?!” his legs get tangled in the hospital sheets as he turns on the lights and he swears he sees her eyelashes twitch. “Rosie, baby?” he takes her hand. “Can you hear me? I’m right here, in prox…”

Calum swallows harshly then snatches up his Michael Faudet book opening to the poem titled ‘Proximity.’ He reads the prose quickly about joining the dots from A to B, empty shores and the sea and everything else in between all the way to the end.

‘For what’s real is meant to be, when two hearts beat—in proximity.’

Rose’s finger twitches against his and Calum’s heart skyrockets.

“Rose?” he whispers in shock. “Come on sweetheart, open your eyes for me. I’m right here. I’m here and I love you so much.” He gasps when the orange glow in his chest brightens and her does as well from his proclamation of love. Tears spring in his eyes then two more fingers twitch. “Rose, I’m here. I love you; I love you, come back to me, Rosie.”

Their glows blaze brighter still, something beeps but Calum pays it no mind because Rose’s eyes flutter for a few seconds and then open. Calum stares in astonishment, oh how he’s missed those ocean eyes.

“Rose?” he whispers. She blinks heavily and he’s smashing the nurse’s call button. “She’s awake! Jane! She’s opened her eyes!” he shouts into the speaker then takes her hand in both of his. Happy tears are falling down his cheeks as she comes to. “Hi sweetheart, I’m right here, you’re okay.”

She tries to focus on him, her mouth tries to open to speak but then she chokes on the feeding tube and he panics. He starts shouting some more for help then Jane and Dr. Robbins rush in. They’re quick to remove the tube and fix the alarms screaming on the machines. Jane pushes Calum gently out of the way so they can work, and other nurses arrive in the room.

“Rose, I’m Dr. Robbins,” Dr. Robbins speaks very slowly and clearly, as if she’s talking to a child. “You’re in the hospital and were in an accident. You’ve been asleep for a while but you’re okay.” She flashes a light in her eyes. “Good. Can you blink twice if you understand me?”

Calum watches in amazement as Rose blinks once…then twice ever so slowly. He could leap for joy.

“That’s good,” Dr. Robbins smiles warmly, “You’ve been in a coma for some time so things may be fuzzy. Are you in pain? Blink once for no and twice for yes.”

Rose blinks twice and Calum’s heart plummets. Has she been in silent pain all this time?

“Jane can help with that, she’s your nurse,” Dr. Robbins smiles again. “I’m going to do some quick tests okay?”

While Dr. Robbins does her testing Calum’s fingers are flying as he texts everyone in excitement. He would call but he can’t take his eyes off Rose and it’s extremely early in the morning. He didn’t want to alarm them in a panic when it was actually good news.

***

A few days have gone by, Calum watches silently as Rose goes through more tests to see how well her reflexes are and her strength. Calum only leaves when he gets a phone call from their friends or his mom to give them updates and share their excitement of her finally being awake. Her eyes are always on him with a twinge of confusion in her dark blue eyes. When she speaks, it’s soft and raspy but it’s the voice of angels to Calum. He’s missed her voice so much.

“I know you want to be alone with him, but I have to make sure you’re all right. He won’t go anywhere, I promise,” Dr. Robbins chuckles while she watches the orthopedic doctor check Rose’s leg.

Calum hopes she’ll be able to get the mechanical thing off her now and they can work on physical therapy so she can walk. He knows her recovery process is going to be long and strenuous. She’s been in a coma for six weeks; her body is stiff and probably feels weird to her, but Calum will be with her every step of the way.

Calum takes a step forward, smile on his face at being acknowledged by Dr. Robbins. Rose’s brows furrow in a concerned v.

“Who is he?”

The rain stops, and the clouds part to reveal a bright sun that shines in Rose’s eyes. The bad weather has ceased, and Calum should be happy that the light of his life is back, but a new storm has arrived as Rose stares at Calum like she’s never seen him before in her life.

• • • •

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[tiaragqueen]

OOoo how about a #5 for itachi on the yandere prompts #1?

Because I Trust You

✂ Pairing: Yandere! Itachi Uchiha x Reader

✂ Word Count: 1,2k+

✂ Trigger Warnings: Manipulation, possessiveness, implied isolation

[Edited]

***

5. “Are you doubting my love for you?”

If you like my writing, please support me on ko-fi!

“All the reasons why I let you go, still there's not a day that can go by when you ain't on my mind at all.” - Doubt My Love [Jaz Karis]

It was during this moment where you were reminded of how lonely you were. Specks of white floated down like little angels, blanketing the entire world with their purity. Dead trees, burdened by overlapping snow, clustered together. The wind howled and tapped the glasses, and you could feel its frigidity seeped through the cracks. You slumped behind a window, vacant eyes staring far into the alabaster woods. A blanket draped over your back as you held a cup of hot tea, the heat intensified the redness on your skin.

When was the last time you saw Itachi again? It felt like months, but you were uncertain. He never left you that long, did he? Or maybe he did. There was no use in predicting his movements. He was as mysterious as the sea itself, smoothly deceived you with its calm appearance. You could frolic on the shore, chattering and laughing under the brilliant sky. But you could never guess the true depth of the ocean, just as you could never guess his genuine motivation and expression. Was he angry at you? Was he sad? Was he tired? You didn’t know. You weren’t adept enough to read between the seemingly blurred lines. But he always humored you, stroking your hair like a doting boyfriend and kissing your lips like he hadn’t practically abandoned you for weeks.

No, not abandoned. He’d never abandoned you. He loved you, or so he said. It was hard to know which one was real and which one was a lie. Maybe he loved your innocence only. You were pretty much gullible to him. He could spout random nonsense and you’d probably agree with a starstruck face. That was just proof of how putty you were in his hands.

Gripping the blanket closer, you sighed. Was that a bad thing, though? He’d saved you, after all. When you were teetering on the verge of insanity, he’d swooped into your rescue, the strange cloak billowing majestically behind him. You’d gazed at him with wide, sparkling eyes as he effortlessly eliminated the ninjas who had shattered your whole life. And you’d eagerly accepted his hand when he offered to whisk you somewhere far, away from the piles of dead bodies and everything you’d come to know.

You were so thankful, so desperate for a companion that you failed to notice the darkness that swirled within his crimson eyes, nor were you aware of his tightening grip on your joined hands. You’d stopped thinking that day, simply and enthusiastically putting your trust and soul in him, a mere stranger. And he’d readily accepted those gifts as he locked the door behind him and turned to face the horror of the outside world.

… Maybe you were gullible. Because if he could leave you without a second thought, without a moment of hesitation, then he must’ve not loved you as deep as he’d claimed.

It hurt to conclude that, but at the same time, you understood. Why would someone like him love you? He probably just took pity on you. The gap between your strengths and intelligence was wide and bottomless. It was only natural that he sought a matching partner, right? Affection could only go so far without connection, and once that your mind had cleared itself, you realized that those deep conversations were as rare as his visits. And even if he did come, you were too busy basking in his quiet affection to notice that he hardly talked about his days or past.

It shouldn’t have bothered you so much. You’d spent days without hearing anything, after all. But it wouldn’t hurt to know a bit, right? He’d probably learned something about you, heck, maybe your entire background. A little reciprocation goes a long way, no?

Fate allowed you no time to contemplate further as the front door clicked open. Itachi shook the snowflakes that stacked upon his raven hair and peered around, noticing that you’d yet to leap on him. You were always the affectionate one between the two of you, and it served to shorten the bridge. He was glad that you’d adapted smoothly to the new environment, much quicker than he’d expected. It meant that manipulation was unnecessary, but a sweet word here and there remained vital to keep your trust.

He’d broken his brother’s once, and he didn’t want to ruin another. Not if he could help it.

“[Name]?” His cool voice drifted through your ears like the calming sound of a steady river. A tall figure appeared on the doorway to your shared room, dark irises immediately found their target. Sensing his stare, you turned your head slightly and beckoned him to accompany you. Itachi smiled, an expression that you would’ve missed had you didn’t look deeper and went to claim his rightful spot beside you. You offered him your full tea, and he accepted it with a soft thanks.

“Where have you been?” you whispered, feeling the telltale nervousness building on your throat. You noted a long period had passed before he answered, and even then, it was ambiguous.

“I was out on an errand.”

“That long?” You didn’t know if it was appropriate for you to press on, but you figured something was better than nothing. Unfortunately, Itachi seemed to catch your abrupt curiosity because he stared at you emotionlessly.

“… Something went wrong along the way.”

And that was his only response before he started to sip the warm tea, a clear indication for you to drop the subject. However, you refused to back down. You thought that you deserved some clarity once in a while, especially when you’d been nothing but understanding to his constant disappearance.

“Why? What happened in there? Did someone attack you?” You knew you were beginning to irritate him – you could see his eyebrows twitched slightly – but you persisted nonetheless. “Why won’t you tell me more, Itachi? You’ve been hiding secrets from me. I feel like… you don’t trust me or something.”

“Are you doubting my love for you?”

“W-what? No! It’s not that. I just…” You gripped your forearm as you looked down nervously. “I just want you to be more… honest with me, you know? We’ve been together for so long, and yet, I barely know a thing about you. It feels unfair to me because you know… well, everything about me.”

Itachi sighed and had you didn’t know him any better, you would’ve thought he was sighing in relief. Maybe he was, you weren’t sure. Even during his relaxed state, his face remained vacant. “You should’ve told me sooner.”

“I know, but I’m scared that you’d be angry with me. I don’t want you to think like I’m disturbing you or something…”

Itachi shook his head, a mildly amused smile gracing his features. It felt surreal to witness such a soft expression from him, and you wondered if he was simply entertained by your innocence.

“Of course not.” Lifting you from the mattress, he sat you on his lap and began to caress your arms as though he was consoling you before you could explode to his face. “I’m sorry that I made you think that way. If you want me to be more honest with you, then I’ll try to do so.”

Somehow, the words didn’t sound too comforting. He’d try, but for how long? Until you forgot about his promise and relished the scanty information you had about him? Until you realized that secrets were basically a part of him?

Regardless, you allowed yourself to fall into the snare by kissing his jaw and rested your head against his collarbone.

“… Thank you, Itachi.”

[shenanigans-and-imagines]

More Than Sufficient: Part 2

Grand Admiral Thrawn x Reader, Gender Neutral

AO3 Link/ Support Me on Ko-fi

Part 1

Summary: Your relationship with Grand Admiral Thrawn leaves many things left unsaid.  But, when a mission goes awry, certain truths are bound to come out.

A/N: Hey, remember when I said I finished this six months ago? Well, I lied.  But it’s finished now.  Enjoy.

Word Count: 2.9K

           You woke up stiff and in considerable pain.  Not intolerable, but enough to leave you incapable of moving your shoulders more than an inch off the mattress before tumbling back down again.

            “Welcome back Captain,” a mechanical voice chimed.

            You turned to see the medical droid beside you, taking notes of your vitals.

            “How long have I been away?” you asked, dryly.

            “Approximately three days, one hour, and 37 minutes,” it answered efficiently.  “The Grand Admiral insisted I keep track.”

            You blinked in surprise.  Perhaps you had underestimated just how much blood you lost during the fight.  Suddenly the pain in your shoulders didn’t seem so bad.

            “I was also told in inform Grand Admiral Thrawn the moment you were conscious.  He is on his way here now.”

            Your stomach tightened. The image of Thrawn hovering over you with softened red eyes as he called your name flooded your mind. A part of you wanted to savor the moment, to hold it close to your heart and never let it go. But, you couldn’t.  It was wrong. You weren’t supposed to remember.  It was too vulnerable, too intimate.  The Thrawn you had come to know would never wish you to see that side of him.  You only hoped he didn’t know you had.

            With a great effort, you pushed yourself fully upright.

            “Captain,” the droid protested.  “I must insist you lay back down.”

            You ignored it, pulling your feet over the side.  You needed to get to your quarters.  You needed to change and face Thrawn standing on your own two feet. You were too vulnerable here to properly lie to him.

            Taking a breath, you stood.  Your vision swam for a moment, but to your relief you stayed upright.  Keeping your head up, you started walking.

            “If you could tell me where my uniform is.”

            The droid bristled, replying with more insistent, “Captain, I really must…”

            You stopped listening and pulled back one of the curtains.  On a chair was a uniform, clean and pressed, with a pair of boots beside it.  Without another word, you started to dress.

            It was slow work.  The pants were the easiest.  Your legs were covered in light bruises, but the steady throbbing in your shoulders made it easy to ignore.  Your boots were next, bringing on the same manageable ache.  It was your shirt which was the real problem.

           You couldn’t raise your arms without a searing pain shooting down from your shoulders.  It took every ounce of effort not to vocalize the discomfort. The moment you did, you knew the medical droid would go running to Thrawn themselves. Slowly, painfully, and through sheer force of will you shimmed and strained to get your undershirt over your head and your arms through the sleeves.  The effort left you sore with sweat dripping on your brow.  Looking down at the button up shirt and uniform jacket still on the chair took all the life out of you.  There was no way you could finish, but you could hardly leave the med bay half dressed.  You started calculating the likelihood of making it to your quarters in this state without being spotted when you heard the doors swish open and shut followed by a pair of precise footsteps.

            “Grand Admiral Thrawn,” the droid greeted.

            “Where is Captain Y/N?” His tone was decidedly measured.  To any who did not know him, he would have sounded perfectly collected, but to your ears, he might as well had shouted the words. 

            “Here, sir,” you said, keeping your voice in a neutral calm despite your racing heart. This confrontation was inevitable, but you could at least gain a few more minutes before looking into those eyes again.  “I understood you were coming to meet me.  I wanted to make myself presentable.”

            There was a pause.  You could practically hear the gears turning in his mind.

            “And are you?”

            “Not quite sir,” you said. “It will take me a few more minutes to be properly dressed.  If you would like to delay this meeting until later--”

            “If you are capable of getting out of the hospital bed and speaking, then I see no reason no reason for delay.  Please, don’t let my presence stop you.”

            This was a trap.  It had to be, but there was nothing for you to do.  Slowly you grabbed your shirt off the chair.

            “Why did you wish to see me, sir?”

            “I wanted to make sure you were well,” he answered, smoothly. “I’m sure the medical droid has told you how long you’ve been unconscious as well as the injuries you sustained.”

           “They have.”

           “Then you would understand my…concern.”

            You stopped. Despite knowing better, your heart sunk heavy in your chest. Yes, concern was the appropriate word to use; professional, polite, impersonal.  The exact opposite of the gentle tone in which he had called your name.

            You shook your head in a vain attempt to clear your mind.  You needed to get out of the medical bay.  You needed to think.

            “You needn’t, sir,” you said. “I—Ah!”

            A sharp pain shot straight through your shoulders as you moved your arm too quickly through your sleeve.  Before you knew what was happening, the curtain was drawn back and Thrawn was by your side.

            “Easy, Captain.”

            You didn’t respond and allowed him to guide you towards the bed without protest.

            You could only imagine what you looked like in that moment.  Half-dressed with one arm through your sleeve, sweat on your brow and most likely pale from blood loss.  You inwardly cursed yourself for not just staying down.  At least then you would have some dignity.

            Thrawn for his part didn’t say a word.  

            With practiced care, he placed his hand under your bare arm and lifted it before guiding it through your other sleeve. 

            You hissed in pain, but it wasn’t nearly as bad as trying to do it yourself.

            He then stepped away, allowing you to button the rest of your shirt.  You couldn’t quite get the last few buttons, but it hardly mattered anymore.

            You waited for an order, a reprimand, anything, but there was only silence.

            Just as the tension was growing to be too much, Thrawn finally spoke.

            “Is there a reason you decided to unnecessarily strain yourself?”

            You took a breath, still unable to meet his eyes. “As I told you sir, I wanted to make myself presentable.  It seems I overestimated my abilities.”

            “Don’t lie to me Captain, it doesn’t suit you.”

            The words were said in his usual cool demeanor, but they held a hidden bite which made you wince.

            “My apologizes. I only meant that…”  Your mind raced trying to find a lie with just enough truth to make it easier to swallow.

            “I did not wish you to see me in such a state,” you answered. “Laid out half dead in medbay is hardly an image befitting a Captain of the Chimera.”

            You met his gaze then.  His eyes were just an intense as you expected them to be and even more unreadable. You might as well had been staring into an open flame.

            “It was a foolish notion,” he said.  The bite was still there, but not nearly as potent.

            “I understand that now,” you admitted. “But I needed to at least attempt to spare my pride.”

            “And did you succeed?”

            “I suppose that’s up to you, sir.”

            Thrawn paused. His lips pressed into a line. “It was merely bruised, not permanently damaged.”

            You couldn’t stop your own lip from quirking upward at the words.  “Thank you, sir.” 

            There was a flash then.  A glimmer of a smile in his red eyes.  It only lasted a moment, hardly a blink.  But you saw it. One more moment to tuck away in your heart.

            You straightened up as best you could, squaring your shoulders and holding your chin high. “Now, if I may ask for the final mission report.”

            Thrawn inclined his head in acknowledgement. Whatever tension remained in the air disappeared. The status quo was back in place.

            “We were able to bring back two of the rebels alive,” he said. “After some interrogation, they confirmed what the ringleader told us.  Fulcrum was in fact on the planet with the ultimate goal to disrupt the mining operation posted there.  We were able to stop their plan, but Fulcrum escaped along with the rest of the rebels.”

            You nodded.  “What was being mined?”

            “I’m afraid it’s classified,” Thrawn answered. “Apparently its contents are highly sensitive.  Even I was unauthorize to examine them.”

            You frowned. What could they possibly be carrying if even a Grand Admiral could not be privy to such information?

            “I have some ideas on the matter,” he said, as if reading your thoughts.  “But, I do not wish to delve into further speculation without more data.”

            You wanted to ask him what his initial thoughts were, but there was nothing for it.  The subject was now closed until further notice.

            “Understood, sir.” 

            There was another pause.  You waited patiently for another bought of information or a dismissal, but neither came.  Thrawn stood perfectly still, incomprehensible and more than a little distant.  Whatever he saw in those red orbs were truly for his eyes only.

            “Is there something else, sir,” you prompted.

            “Yes,” he said, coming back to reality so smoothly you questioned if he ever left. “I wanted to apologize.”

            You blinked. “Sir?”

            “For jeopardizing the mission and for your injuries,” he clarified. “It was my presence on the planet which prompted the attack.  You instructed me to stay behind and I disregarded your warning. The end result was the escape of Fulcrum and the rest of the rebel forces along with the near death of one of my best officers.  It was my decision alone, and I apologize.”

            “Admiral, I…” You floundered.  Thrawn? Grand Admiral Thrawn, apologize? To you? Every sentence required a response. He thought of you as one of his best officers? You wanted to say so many things, but everything scrambled together until all you could say was, “It wasn’t your fault.”

            He inclined his head all while giving you a subtly doubtful look. “Thank you for your words, Captain, but I fail to see how.”

            “The rebels already knew I was coming,” you countered, easily. “Best case scenario I would have been captured and interrogated. Just as likely, the ringleader would have shot me for annoying him. Neither scenario ends with me safely back aboard the Chimera.  And both end with the rebels achieving their goal and walking free.”

            “You could have escaped,” Thrawn offered.  “Given your capabilities, it is just as likely you would have discovered the rebel’s plan and found a way to contact the ship without falling into their hands.”

            “I appreciate your faith in my abilities. But it doesn’t stop the notion from being pure speculation.”

            “It is hardly speculation or faith, for that matter.  It is a statement of observable fact. Your abilities would not allow for anything less.”

He held you gaze as if to make certain you understood the sincerity of his words.

            Your breath caught in your throat. If Thrawn noticed, he made no mention of it.

            “All the more reason I should have trusted you with my true purpose in accompanying you,” he said.

            You shook your head.  “No.  How could you tell me about something you weren’t even certain was real? My mission was to collect information on the rebels.  If you had told me your suspicions, it would have obstructed my view of the facts presented to me. I will not deny I was a little displeased when I realized you knew more than you initially let on, but I understand why.  Truly.”

            He didn’t say anything for a long moment, taking the time to scan your features. 

            Your mind brought you back to your first meeting. You kept still and allowed him to conduct his examination without hinderance. 

            “Yes, I suppose you do.”

            His tone was soft, reflecting the moments you were trying so desperately to keep buried your mind and out of your heart.  Heat rose in your cheeks and in your ears. You couldn’t explain how you managed to hold his gaze.

            “May I make an inquiry, Captain?” he asked.

            “Of course, sir.”

            “What do you remember of the moments before you became unconscious?”

            Your breath caught in your throat, but you managed to keep it off your face. “Nothing, sir.”

            His eyes narrowed then, and his head tilted to one side. “Nothing at all?”

            Blood was now rushing to your ears.  You gripped the bed to keep your hands from shaking, but you shouldn’t have bothered.  He could see it all; every involuntary twitch, every sharp breath there was no hiding from him now.

            “Sir—"

            “Captain.” Clean, precise, and a reminder of the uselessness of lying.

           “I saw nothing of importance to the mission,” you said, carefully.

            “Meaning you observed something else?”

            “I hardly know.”

            “Do you doubt your senses?” he pressed.

            “No, I…”  You took a breath.  No half lies.  There was no longer a point.  He was determined for a straight answer, and frankly, you were just too tired.

            “I do not wish to cause you embarrassment by my own…interpretations.”

            You met his eye allowing him to look upon and examine every unspoken feeling your words could convey. 

            He took his time, as you knew he would.  You waited for the realization, a sign of embarrassment or even disgust.  But like every time before, there was nothing save for mild fascination.

            “I see,” he said. “And these interpretations, do you wish to be true?”

            “Yes.”

            He nodded. “Your worry then is that your hopes have somehow skewed the facts.”

            “Yes.”

            Again, he nodded and with careful thought, took a step closer. 

            He stood tall before you.  Your eyes met his chest due to the height of the bed.  This was becoming too much.  He knew how this affected you. He had to.

            It was then you felt it; a simple touch.  His fingers gently traced he outline of your jaw almost a whisper against your skin until coming to your chin.  With a simple ounce of pressure, he tilted your face up to his.

            “Then allow me to clarity,” he said. 

            And with that, he kissed you. 

            His lips were softer than you anticipated, his touch careful and deliberate as everything else he did.  It was easy to give in, as you closed you eyes to the sensation. There was no hesitation, or a question being asked, but a tenderness you didn’t think Thrawn was capable of.

            Slowly he pulled away, leaving you content and just a little dizzy.  You blinked your eyes back open to find his glowing red one staring back at you.

            “Was that a sufficient explanation, Captain,” he asked.

            A small smile twitched at the corner of your mouth. “More than sufficient sir,” you said.  “However, I may require you to go into slightly more detail.”

            There was no denying the humor in his eyes now, as an almost relieved smile came to his features.

            “Gladly,” he said before kissing you one more.

            There was something different about his kiss.  The precise calculation was gone replaced with something warm and spontaneous.  You met him with enthusiasm as your hands wandered between his chest and neck. You thrilled as he took a sharp take of breath when you fingers curled around the hair at the base of his neck.  He wanted you.  Thrawn wanted you.

            He kissed you deeper then, parting your lips with a groan of satisfaction. His hands fell securely at your waist, pulling you close as he found a natural spot in between your legs.

            You weren’t sure even if he knew where this was going, but you eager to find out.

           “Grand Admiral, you’re needed--oh! Sorry sir.”

            You broke away to see Commander Vanto standing in the doorway keeping his eyes on a very interesting part of the ceiling.

            Your stomach turned with embarrassment.  Unable to think of anything else to do, you hid your face in Thrawn’s chest.

            Thrawn, for his part, kept perfectly still not even bothering to release his hold of you.

            “Did you need something Commander?” he said, the irritation evident in his voice.

           “You’re needed on the bridge,” Vanto said, still not having it in him to look at either of you.  “Message from command.”

            Thrawn nodded, before turning his attention to you.  

            You looked up to him.  His face was calm, if not a little irritated, but his gaze was gentle.  It felt odd to see on such a sever face, but not unwelcome. You wondered idly if it was a look you would have to get used to; it was a lovely thought.

            He then took your hand, and raised it to his lips, pressing a kiss into the palm.

            “Rest well Captain,” he said. “I have a feeling we’ll need you back on the bridge sooner rather than later.”

            “Understood sir.”

            He gave a small smile of approval and with some reluctance, stepped away.

            You watched him go, briefly meeting the Commander’s eyes as you did.

            Vanto said nothing to you, but his expression made his feelings clear; mild embarrassment, but no ill will.  He gave you a small nod, which you returned.

            “Commander Vanto,” Thrawn said, as the pair of them walked out the door. “I would appreciate…”

            “Nobody will hear it from me,” Eli assured.

            They left then leaving the remainder of their conversation to themselves.

            You sat alone with only the mild hum of the ships engine to break the silence. You weren’t sure what to do, what to think.  Involuntarily, you cupped the hand Thrawn had kissed with the other, still tingling from the touch.  You brought it to your lips and a smile spread across your face until you let out a surprised bought of laughter.

            More than sufficient indeed

[delaneytveit]

Satellites Part 13

WHOOOOO we’re halfway thereeee! OOOHHHHH (Actually we’ve been a little bit more than half way for a bit) but don’t worry, there’s still A LOT of story to get through. If you guys enjoyed this chapter as much as I enjoyed writing it, please consider buying me a coffee! 

Oh and I’m on twitter! if you want to give a follow, or watch me scream into the void about Lance in tactical gear, that’s the place! 

Twitter - sfw -> @/spacemom_laney | nsfw -> @/15_agentwash

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 ( Part 12 ) ( Satellites Master Post ) (Part 14) 

The team left at 0800 the next morning. Allura had convinced, after quite a long time, Blue to let her pilot. Though it was clear that Blue was not happy about it. The only lion that was missing was the red one.

Keith had chosen to stay behind, to much confusion of the team. Though Lance could vaguely guess why. He felt guilty. Keith had been the one to bring into question Lance’s ability to complete missions, and even though that wasn’t his intention, he knew that it still hurt Lance.

Their relationship was rocky as it was. Neither of them really knew where they stood with the other, what they were to each other, and it seemed that the present situation had complicated things even more so.

Lance was refusing to talk to Keith, and it hurt. He hadn’t meant to indirectly ground the sharpshooter. He had only wanted to voice his concerns to Allura, positive that she would be able to do something for Lance that he couldn’t.

Normally, the only kind of confrontation Keith would be willing to face was violent, but he didn’t want to fight Lance. He wanted to apologize. To take responsibility for what was happening to Lance. He owed him that much at least.

It wasn’t hard to track the Blue Paladin down. He had locked himself in his room since breakfast. It was a good thing Keith knew the code by heart.

Punching in the code, he was relieved when the door whooshed open revealing Lance sitting at his desk. Keith could hear the volume of the headphones from where he stood, which made him cringe. The EDM music that Lance listened to was loud enough, didn’t anyone warn him of blowing out an eardrum?

Keith knocked twice before taking loud steps towards the boy, hoping that they would be loud enough to let Lance know that he was there. Lance’s anxiety had spiked dramatically since his return and it took one accidental sneak up by Pidge to inform the team that it was vital for Lance to know that you were coming, so as to avoid a swift punch to the face out of panic.

“What do you want, Keith?” Lance sighed as he removed his earphones. He swiveled his chair to look at the red paladin, arms crossed as he leaned back in his seat.

This was it, Keith had been rehearsing his apology for hours now, trying to make it sound as genuine and coherent as possible. Though at the very moment, what ever award winning speech he had come up with beforehand had vanished as those hard blue eyes stared into him.

“I’m sorry.” he blurted out, cursing himself for his lack of grace.

He immediately dropped his gaze, eyes staring at the floor. There was only a tense silence between them, and Keith begged his mind to come up with something, anything to put an end to this crushing feeling.

But of course, his mind, nor his mouth could seem to work correctly.

It was Lance who broke the silence instead.

“For?” he asked, the question forcing Keith to look up and face the boy. Blue eyes met his once more, a questioning brow raised as Lance waited for Keith to answer.

He could do this.

“I shouldn’t have told Allura about all of this. I- I didn’t know that she would take you off of missions. I should have talked to you and voiced my concerns to you, you didn’t deserve what Allura did to you and it's my fault that it happened. And I am so, so sorry for that.” He was rambling, he knew he was. How did people do this? How did they apologize?

He was only stopped when Lance held up his hand.

“I appreciate the apology, I really do. And to be honest, I’m glad that you told Allura. I don’t think she would have found out if you hadn’t. I’m not mad at you Keith.”

“You’re not?”

Lance chuckled a little, running a hand through his hair.

“I mean, I am a little bit. But I think I’m more pissed at the situation in general.” Lance leaned forward, perching his elbows on his knees. Looking down at his clasped hands, Lance spoke “You guys are right, I’m not okay. I haven’t been for a while and no matter how much I pretend that I am, I’m just hurting myself. I’m not getting better.” he sounded so...broken. Lance never really talked about himself, at all really. Superficial things, sure. Like how he got barely any sleep, or that he missed his mom’s cooking. But he never really talked about things deeper than that. Keith hadn’t really noticed until now, but Lance had been hiding a big part of himself away this entire time, and it only came out at his most vulnerable times at night.

A year ago, Keith would have thought of the way that Lance talks about himself as vain, but now he knew that it wasn’t really the case. Lance has been putting on a mask this whole time.

“But we don’t have time. The universe doesn’t have time for me to get better. It's a long ass process that Voltron can’t afford.”

He was right, of course he was right. Lance was vital to Voltron, even if he didn’t really see himself that way. He still knew that Voltron needed him. It was even more present today with Blue’s little tantrum about having to take on Allura as a pilot.

“But is the universe really more important than having you here?” That was what Keith was most afraid of. Lance had always been the self-sacrificial type. He couldn’t argue that he himself was any better, but Lance seemed to take it to a whole new level. The paladin would miss sleep and meals to make sure that everyone else was taken care of. He would jump in front of a bullet in a second to spare the others. On one occasion Lance had bounded into a burning building to save a few children stuck on the third floor, that had been the worst as it only reminded Keith of how he lost his father. He couldn’t lose Lance too.

“Keith-”

“No, Lance. Listen to me. The universe is not worth you throwing yourself away like that. What you need time to heal, what you went through was fucking terrible. It's no wonder you have PTSD from it.”

���We are the literal Defenders of the Universe, I can’t just not do my job!”

“I’m not asking you to stop being a paladin! I’m asking to for once in your life put yourself first. We need you, I need you! You need to let yourself heal from all of this because there is no Voltron if you continue to let your own health fall by the wayside!” Keith meant every word of it. They needed Lance. They needed him to come back, to be the best he could be, and as hard as he was trying right now, this wasn’t it.

“I’m worried for you, Lance. I can’t lose you too.” Keith’s voice was so small, he himself almost didn’t hear it. But he knew that Lance did, as the boy stood up from his seat and walked over to Keith, instantly wrapping his arms around the shorter one.

“You won’t Keith, I’m not going anywhere. I promise.”

Keith breathed in the scent of ocean and sandalwood of Lance’s detergent, and thanked whatever higher being was there that Lance had insisted on buying his own detergent all those mall trips ago. The pompous asshole had good taste in soap, and it comforted Keith easily.

“Just promise me you’ll at least try.”

He felt Lance take a deep breath.

“I am trying, Keith. I’m trying every day.” If Keith felt the shaky breaths or the wetness on his shoulder, he said nothing. It was clear that Lance needed this as much as he did, maybe even more. “I never wished I was Shiro, more than I do right now. He’s been through everything and he’s able to handle it all so easily.”

Oh, absolutely not. There was no way in hell Keith would let Lance talk about himself like that.

He pulled away from their hug, to much of his own dismay, and held Lance at arms length. Violet eyes bore into icy blue ones. The eyes that he could get lost in, but now as not the time to think about that, Keith.

“Lance, you said it yourself. WHat Shiro went through and what you went through was completely different.”

“But-”

“No. You really think that Shiro would be in any better of a state than you are now after being treated the way you were? I have no idea the extent of what they did to you, but I do know that it had to have been absolute hell. You don’t get to compare your pain to others, just because they seem to be doing better than you. Your pain is your own, so stop being an idiot and just acknowledge the fact that those guys are assholes!”

Keith was most definitely not expecting a chuckle from the Blue Paladin, but he assumed it would be better than the alternative.

“That was good, Mullet. You come up with all that yourself?”

Keith rolled his eyes. Of course, leave it to Lance to make a joke about a serious conversation.

“As a matter of fact, I did. And I’ll say it again. As many times as I need to for it to get through your tiny brain.”

“Hey! I’ll assure you my brain is of average size. Some may say it's even above average!”

It was Keith’s turn to laugh.

“Yeah, I’m sure it is.” he joked offhandedly, letting his grip on Lance’s arms finally fall.

Lance fixed him with his characteristically famous smirk that Keith knew could only mean trouble.

“Want to know what else is above average size?” Lance waggled his eyebrows knowingly as Keith facepalmed.

“Oh my god, Lance. No!”

[itmighthavebeenintentional]

Shackled

Chapter 1

Summary: After nearly ten years, Sam Winchester calls Miriam Bard to collect on a life debt. Unfortunately for Miriam, Sam leaves out a few important details.

Warning: Implied loss of family, grieving, depression, cursing, Demon!Dean, Sam’s tendency to leave out vital details for folks helping him to save Dean (read: Sam’s tendency to be a Winchester)

Word count: 1,895

Author’s Note: This story would not be possible without @thoughtslikeaminefield​ , who convinced me to write and finish this story, cheered me on every step of the way, and convinced me that even after over a year of not finishing a single thing, I hadn’t lost my writing after all. MJ, thank you for poking the story til it squeaked. And for the banner. And lots and lots of other things. If you’re reading this, hi! Have a seat and strap in, it’s gonna be a bumpy ride (in the best way!).

“Hey, Miriam, it’s Sam...Sam Winchester...I don’t know if you remember me from-”

“I remember you, Sam. Not likely to forget a Winchester, much less...it’s one in the morning, what’s up?”

“I need to call in that favor.”

“All right. Where do you need me?”

…

Miriam stared blearily at the road as it stretched out in an infinite blur of dismal sameness, each expanse of asphalt and surrounding fields a dreary replica of the one before.

The last couple hundred or so miles had been hypnotically wretched, especially with the remnants of her headache hanging on by the tips of its claws since Sam Winchester had woken her with a phone call a few hours ago.

Caffeine and aspirin had taken the edges off, but straining her eyes into the endless darkness, alternating occasionally with too-bright headlights shattering the night (fucking halogens), had done nothing to ease the sharp ache that wouldn’t quite dissipate.

If she was being honest, the headache had been hanging around much longer than just a few hours, and if Sam’s call hadn’t woken her, the nightmares would have. They always did. She couldn’t really remember what an uninterrupted night of sleep felt like anymore. Exhaustion was her state of existence; it was preferable to feeling anything else.

“Suck it up, Miri,” she muttered into the muffled quiet of the car. Even her GPS was set on silent; the soft hum of the engine was the only noise she allowed to permeate her cocoon of quiet suffering.

Aaron would have been blasting some stupid metal band on the stereo, slapping her hand away every time she went to turn it down or change the station. He wouldn’t offer to drive and let her sleep off any physical maladies, but she wouldn’t have accepted anyway. He was a shit driver, and she always said she’d rather live long enough to let the next case kill her rather than the inevitable wreck if her brother was behind the wheel.

“Suck it up, Miri! Take another pill and quit whining!” he would have told her in the middle of an air drum solo.

Would have.

“Shut up,” Miriam muttered aloud. She drove on.

She pulled up outside something she would have dismissed as public waterworks or an electric station if Sam hadn’t told her what to look for. No cars outside, no mailbox, nothing to tell her this was an actual residence and not the setting for a seventies slaughterhouse flick. She checked her phone.

Text me when you get here; I’ll come let you in.

Alrighty, then.

Sam met her at the door and led her into the last sort of place Miriam could have imagined, a cross between a sci-fi/post-apocalypse novel and some sort of Cold War relic. He gave her the briefest of explanations as he led her through the bunker, saying something about legacies and a secret society, information which mostly passed right through her fatigue-addled head.

Pretty nice home base, she thought as they walked through the meeting room and past the library.

The research-oriented part of her itched to run her fingers over the spines of those books, to find out what was inside. Miriam cringed internally as she heard the echo of Aaron’s voice calling her a nerd, equal parts affection and ridicule in his voice. Then she throttled the pain down, locked the thoughts away, and dragged herself back to the present.

A few minutes later, Miriam was slinging her duffel down on one of the nicest beds she’d been able to claim in any capacity in months, maybe even years. Absolutely spartan and about six decades out of date, almost military in decor, but it was clean, and it had air, electricity, and both sheets and blankets on the bed. No nasty or rotten surprises left by former inhabitants; definitely an upgrade on a few of the shitholes she’d stayed in.

“We’ve got a fully stocked kitchen just down the hallway, and showers. Let me know if you need anything,” Sam said, rubbing the back of his head.

Miriam decided to save him further discomfort and cut to the chase.

“Fancy digs, Sam. It’s been a few years. You wanna tell me what’s got you so bothered?”

She’d noticed a distinct lack of the elder Winchester on the way in, but Miriam’s own recent history had done nothing if not jam a filter firmly in her mouth that kept her from sharing any and all thoughts that flowed through her mind.

Sam’s mouth quivered at the corners before he schooled his features into a mask of control that failed to hide the depth of his worry.

“I...Dean is why I called you. It’s...complicated.”

She took advantage of the awkward pause to re-evaluate Sam Winchester. He’d aged a lot in the few years since she and Aaron had run across the Winchesters. He’d grown broader since she last saw him, and he gave the impression of being even taller than she remembered, to say nothing of the length of his hair. She resisted the urge to offer him a hair tie for his shaggy mane.

Her gaze flicked down to his injured right arm, bound to his chest in a sling. She waited for several beats, but when he didn’t continue, she crossed her arms sternly, letting a shade of her impatience show on her face.

“You called me, Sam.”

Sam cleared his throat as if he still couldn’t get the words out. Miriam sighed. Her headache flared, burning the inside of her skull like a wash of acid between her eyes. Fatigue pulled at her, weighing her down towards the bed, but she locked her knees and straightened her back until she could trust her weary body not to betray her to gravity.

“Sam, we’re not close friends, I get that, but you called me here because I owe you, and hopefully because you know you can count on me. I haven’t been in the field recently, wasn’t planning on it any time soon. I’m tired; it’s been a hell of a year. If you want my help, talk to me. If not, I’m taking advantage of your hospitality to catch a few hours sleep in a decent bed, then I’ll head back out.”

“Dean’s a demon.”

His bald declaration woke her as the coffee she’d consumed after his phone call hadn’t.

Wasn’t expecting that, she thought as her eyebrows threatened to meet her hairline.

“Demons aren’t my area of expertise, Sam. And, let’s be honest, it’s fairly common knowledge that the Winchesters can exorcise a demon. What do you need me for?”

Sam shook his head, tension making the movement jerky and stiff as his jaw tightened. He had circles under his eyes to rival hers, and his shoulders slumped with a weight she knew all too well.

He reached up, awkwardly tugging down the neckline of his shirt to reveal a tattooed symbol she vaguely recalled from research she’d done years ago.

“Neither of us can be possessed,” he said, shrugging his shirt back into place with a wince of discomfort. “Dean is...Look, just come with me; I need to check on him anyway. You'll see.”

Making a physical effort to keep her jaw from hanging slack, Miriam followed Sam from the small bedroom. The whole situation was surreal, and the bland, institutional walls of the bunker only added to Miriam’s sense of dissociation.

She raised a curious eyebrow as Sam led her into what looked like nothing so much as a large file storage room.

Their footsteps echoed strangely; the space felt somehow emptier than the full shelves should have allowed. The ceiling, higher than what seemed necessary, continued much further back than the shelves. And what kind of shelving needed caging to connect it to the ceiling? The metal screen wasn’t what drew her attention, though.

The second she set foot in the room, Miriam felt an inexplicable pull to look behind those shelves, to push past Sam and shove the files out of the way. There was a presence in the room, something that spoke to a place deep inside her that she’d trained herself not to acknowledge, something familiar and forbidden all at once.

For the first time in months, she felt something more than tired, foggy despair.

Whatever was back there, Miriam wanted it.

It took her a second to realize that Sam was speaking.

“Don’t...um...don’t let him get to you, okay? It’s Dean, but it...isn’t,” Sam finished lamely with a grimace.

Miriam tilted her head to the side, considering his words. She opened her mouth, then closed it and shrugged, bracing herself for whatever it was Sam didn’t seem to be able to explain.

His shoulders slumped for a moment as he struggled to pull himself together.

Miriam hadn’t spent much time with the Winchesters, just the couple of weeks they'd worked that witch case all those years ago. Sam and Dean had been so in tune with each other, working the case with instinct and skill on a level that she’d both admired and envied. Then they went and saved her stupid brother.

Sam had been so much younger, then, not exactly sure of himself, but much more solid and in control than the tired, injured man in front of her.

“I owe you, and I mean it,” she’d said back then, shaking first Dean’s and then Sam’s hands, looking each brother in the eyes.

“You need someone to watch your back, to help you take something down, I’ll be there. I wouldn’t normally speak for that asshole,” she nodded at her younger brother, currently sleeping off the leftover ill effects from the hex bag that had nearly taken his life, “but I’ll go ahead and vouch for his dumb ass, too. Call me if you need me. Don’t lose my number.”

She hadn’t heard from them since.

Oh, she had heard plenty of them. What hunter hadn’t? All sorts of misadventures and exploits, taking down creatures most hunters had only ever heard of, much less encountered. But Miriam had gotten no phone calls from them, no requests for help. She figured they'd probably forgotten her and Aaron the moment they’d left town, rock blasting from the speakers of their legendary Impala as they cruised on to the next town, the next case.

“Why now, Sam?” Miriam asked quietly. “After all this time, why call me now?”

There were approximately a thousand more questions she wanted to ask, chiefly what the cage behind those shelves was holding, but she held her tongue after the one. Sam had obviously brought her here for a reason, so she reminded herself to be patient and ready for whatever happened next.

The younger Winchester hung his head for a moment longer, then turned eyes on her that were so familiar, her heart seized in her chest. She saw those same eyes every time she’d looked at her own reflection in the mirror since she’d returned from that last job, with one more scar and one less brother.

“Because I knew you’d understand.”

And then Sam straightened, and she watched as he willed steel through his limbs, stiffening his spine and hardening his features. He pulled on a narrow section of shelving and rolled it out of the way.

“Heya, Sammy.”

...

Chapter 2 is up! 

[howtobeapersonwithfibro]

Disabled Sci-Fi: Internship-seeking Veronica

Here (below the cut) is the next short story in my Disabled Sci-Fi series. It centers around Veronica Lee, a wheelchair user living on a colony spaceship. She’s just finished high school and is looking for an intern position in her favorite field: science.

Feedback (and suggestions for future stories) always welcome :) I just really enjoy writing about disabled characters using the knowledge I’ve picked up about experiences from spoonie/disability tumblr and being disabled myself. 

*****

Veronica takes a deep breath. She adjusts her position in her wheelchair to be a bit more comfortable. Tries to resist the urge to strangle the woman across the table. 

“As you know, Ms. Lee,” the woman in the stiff, gray clothes continues, “Everyone has a role to play on the ship. We begin to look for career matches at age sixteen so that everyone can find their ideal role. I just imagine that our choices will be… limited… given your situation.” 

Inwardly, Veronica rolls her eyes. Sometimes she may as well have three heads, for the way people struggle to talk to her like a normal person. Like being unable to walk is a situation and not just another detail of her life, like having straight hair. “I know why you might think that,” Veronica replies, choosing her words carefully. This woman is the only career counselor for the entire ship, so she doesn’t have the option of pissing her off. “But I think that accommodations can be made for most of the jobs around here. It’s not like I’m asking to be a zero-gravity engineer. And my chair can get almost anywhere, with all the ramps.”

The gray woman gives a small, forced smile, and says, “Alright then. What are your areas of interest?”

“I’m most interested in biology,” Veronica says, relieved to be talking about something else. “Whether it’s working in the medical wing or in a lab, I’m just really interested in those kinds of things.” 

“Hmm,” the woman mutters, scrolling through a document on the screen in front of her. “There’s an open trainee position in the botany lab. Job description includes… let’s see here… working with microscopes and other various tools to alter plants and fight disease…” 

“Sounds great. I was good with microscopes in my classes.” Maybe this is actually going to be fine, Veronica thinks. 

“I’m looking over the images of the lab,” the woman goes on, “and all of the counters are standard-height. I’m not sure if you’d be able to reach everything you needed to--”

“Adjustments can be made,” Veronica interrupts. 

“It’s just that the lab has very strict rules about what kind of furniture can be present, due to cleaning procedures, and…” she sighs. “I’m sorry. The system is quite inflexible sometimes, but the procedures are important for optimal plant growth.”

“The system is only as inflexible as we make it,” Veronica argues. “Please, just put me down for the trial position. I can talk to my trainer about making things work.” 

The woman sighs. “I suppose I can do that. If it’s not a good fit, we can always try something else. I hear the food service wing has a variety of opportunities.”

Yes, Veronica thinks, because my perfect grades and area of interest just scream “food service”. But she’s getting a shot at what she wants, so she’s going to do her best to tolerate this prejudiced woman. “Um, thank you. I’ll see how the botany job goes first.”

“Wonderful,” the woman says, in a rehearsed, not-very-wonderful tone. “All of the information has been sent to your messages app. The position starts next week, but you’ll want to look over everything to make sure you’re prepared.” 

***

The next day, Veronica has an appointment to meet her training supervisor and talk with him about the lab and the work they do there. When she arrives at the lab wing and wheels through the sliding doors, she is faced with a bored-looking receptionist who barely glances up from his screen. Once he sees her chair, he looks up again, muttering, “Can I help you with something? Are you lost?”

Lost, she inwardly huffs, desperately trying not to roll her eyes. Because they’re not used to seeing someone who looks like me around here. She takes a breath, then says, “Um, actually, I’m here to meet with Dr. Stonecroft about the trainee position. Veronica Lee? Meeting set for 10:30?”

The young man takes a moment to process this, then says, “Oh, right, I see it in here. I’ll send a message to Dr. Stonecroft that you’re here.”

As she waits, Veronica mentally steels herself for the argument she expects will come. She spent most of the night lying awake thinking of her rebuttals to various questions, and obsessing about it via messaging with her friend Lila until she fell asleep and stopped responding. 

Veronica wanted this job so badly. She couldn’t imagine being stuck somewhere like food service her entire life, not when she had such an interest in science. 

A door behind the receptionists’ desk slid open, and through it walked a short, brown-skinned man with round glasses and a lab coat. “You must be Veronica,” he said, greeting her with a smile and extending his hand down to shake hers. “Herman Stonecroft, glad to finally meet you. Please, come with me.”

She followed him eagerly, squeezing carefully through a narrow doorway that barely allowed room for her fingers to move the wheelchair without getting squished. When it widened into a hallway, Dr. Stonecroft slowed to walk by her side, guiding her first into the greenhouse. 

It was one of the most beautiful places Veronica had ever seen. Most of the places on the ship were dull shades of gray, sparingly decorated because supplies had to be conserved. But this room was alive with color: Red tomatoes and berries hanging on vines, nearly ripe enough to pick; yellow peppers and another plant that Veronica couldn’t identify; and green, green everywhere, from the early sprouts in their hydroponic rows to the leaves of fruit trees and tall corn stalks. 

“This is amazing,” Veronica said. “I’ve never seen so many plants in one place. And it smells so… fresh,” she added, trying out a word she hadn’t had much cause to use before. Little in life was fresh when you lived in space.

Dr. Stonecroft smiled. “I remember thinking that the first time I came here too. The greenhouse is lovely, of course, and very showy, but most of our work is done back in the labs. We’ll come to water the plants, but other workers harvest them. We spend most of our time managing disease and keeping our plants strong. Our effort is vital to maintain food supply.”

“Right, of course,” she replied, not discouraged. “It’s just a privilege to be able to see all of this. They let us each grow a bean plant in science class, and I thought that was cool.”

“I’ll show you to the labs now,” Dr. Stonecroft said, leading her through a large set of double doors at the back of the room. They led into a hallway with a few other doors, and she could see through the glass walls that each contained lab benches with microscopes and other instruments. 

He scanned his badge at one of the doors, and it slid open to allow them through. Veronica noticed that all of the countertops were slightly above eye level for her; she couldn’t imagine getting her arms up there to work productively, let alone looking into a microscope that sat even higher. But Dr. Stonecroft didn’t seem to notice the disparity. He continued right on with his enthusiastic introduction as a few scientists turned from their work to stare at her. 

“We start most of our interns out with basic microscopy - slide preparation, cell counting, studying images to learn signs of abnormal growth. You’ll help tend some of the plants as well. And of course you’d be led through this by another team member when I’m not available. You wouldn’t be expected to do anything on your own for some time - I know that the school’s science department was a bit lacking in resources.”

“That sounds great,” Veronica said. “I thought microscopy was really cool, but we only had two microscopes for the whole class to use, and they were pretty old. So I’ll be happy to learn as much as possible here.” 

Dr. Stonecroft smiled. He was fairly soft spoken, and Veronica had decided already that she would enjoy learning from him - if this worked out. “I’m glad to hear that, Veronica,” he began. “I wish more students had your interest in this area. I’ve had several trainees think that they were here to water plans and pick fruit, and decided to quit when they learned it was much more.”

Veronica nodded. It seemed like this was a really promising opportunity. “Right. But, Dr. Stonecroft, we should probably talk about -- I mean, I’m sure you noticed. I’m in a wheelchair. I can’t exactly reach the lab countertops, or the ground-level planters. The lady at the career center mentioned that sometimes regulations don’t allow certain furniture, but--”

“Veronica,” he said, stopping her. “Let me tell you something. I have never turned an interested student away, and I don’t plan to now. I will saw the legs off of some lab benches myself if necessary.” He gave her a small but knowing smile. “As long as you like it here, we will be lucky to have you.”

It felt like a weight had been lifted off of Veronica’s chest. Sure, she could still see a couple of the scientists side-eyeing her as they pretended to get on with their work. Sure, not everyone would be used to her at first. But her mentor was open-minded and friendly. And everyone else would get used to her and her chair, especially once she showed them the kind of work she could do. 

She hadn’t met someone like Dr. Stonecroft in a long time - someone who just treated her like a person, instead of a person in a wheelchair. She felt pressure behind her eyes, excited and happy tears, and hurried to wipe one away before he could notice. “Thank you so much, Dr. Stonecroft. I’m so excited to start here.”

Dr. Stonecroft escorted her back to the entrance. “We will see you Monday, Veronica.” 

Once the sliding door to the lab wing closed behind her, she let her smile break open wide and wheeled as fast as she could down the quiet hallways, barely able to contain herself. When she was finally home, the door closed behind her, she screeched with delight. “Yes! I did it!” she yelled to no one in particular. For once, she thought with a contented sigh, something finally worked out.