#tgcf is my reason to live tbh
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yumaisbored · 1 year ago
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who am i without tgcf? a depressed shell of a person. and what of it? move on.
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sasukimimochi · 2 years ago
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The sound of low, raspy humming of a familiar tune took his attention away, lifting his head to gaze into the nearby forest of Yiling. “Wei Ying?”
Following his siren song, Lan Wangji shook as he brought himself to his feet. He grimaced in pain, taking a few shallow breaths but never able to breathe too deeply. The ache in his back forced him to stop routinely, but he couldn’t give up now… The melody was so close.
He pushed forward, stumbling into dense foliage and pushing it aside painfully. “Wei Ying…?” His body froze, pupils shrinking in shock.
Sitting upright against a tree in the distance was a corpse holding a young child, and not just any corpse and child. It was Wei Wuxian with Wen Yuan. Calmly drifting around the corpse was a thick resentment, moving like a living thing protecting its young. The moment the two were stumbled upon though, the humming came to an abrupt halt and the resentment curled around the two protectively.
Despite Wei Wuxian not turning his head nearly as quickly as he usually would to figure out who had stumbled upon them, the resentment reared itself almost like a feral animal in defense, giving the two a wide berth from the Lan.
“...Wei Ying…A-Yuan?” Lan Wangji managed, his heart falling to his feet.
He was too late.
this first art for TDKW! What do you guys think? v//w//v i rly like this one im proud of it
See More for TDKW below the line!
“The Dead Keep Walking” / TDKW - General rating* *maybe Teen if gross things are described, tbh more likely to be teen but not sure.
TDKW is a short project I have planned centered around LWJ finding the dead body of WWX and A-Yuan is with him- but WWX is undead and walking. WWX may be a corpse, but he is conscious- a bit more like TGCF in that sense for plot reasons, but I may provide a sort of "as canon as possible" answer to fit more into mdzs properly. maybe something like a tag he attached to his skin or something before death combined with resentment from his living body.
WWX is not completely right in the head; he repeats things a lot, has lost the ability partially to actually debate with people (he will just repeat himself when he knows he's correct or wants something) has an uncharacteristically flat expression because of his state and his movements aren't always too fluid. he is however still good at protecting, as his resentment still resides with him in death. he has become more unapologetically feral as a result.
There's not a lot of information I can share yet for this fic, but I wanted to share it since I have been thinking about it for quite some time!
A R T:
Broken Lullaby Sparkles and fretting
Music Playlist!
Find more MDZS art/projects on my masterpost! ❤
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chaos-of-the-abyss · 2 months ago
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[warning: spoilers]
omg!! omg omg omg!! i see you've been blogging about tgcf!!
ughhhh interesting timing, especially since I just recently got into a slump because of that damn drama audio of shi qingxuan crying in the [yk-what-scene.] 😭 i wonder if you've seen it?
anyways!!! back to my suffering agenda,
what are your thoughts on He Xuan's seemingly tragic ending?
If my sources are right,
Shi qingxuan can't reincarnate and will die, and He Xuan, out of guilt, will look after him from afar until Shi qingxuan's eventual death. Then afterwards, He Xuan disappears because he has no reason left to live. (based on an interview).
What do you think of this?
Also, do you think Ji Wudu got what he deserved? Should he have suffered more?
Were you satisfied with Ji Wudu's death scene and He Xuan's revenge? Or do you wish it played out differently?
That's all!!
Ack! Sorry if it's too much questions, I just got excited 😅❤️
thank you! 🙏♥️🙏
don't apologize anon! i'm always down for a yap session lol. also for anyone who hasn't finished tgcf, anyone who or plans to read it... HERE BE SPOILERS. MASSIVE SPOILERS. PLEASE DO NOT PROCEED PLEASE
i believe it's correct that shi qingxuan cannot enter the cycle of reincarnation and once he dies he's dead -- from my understanding, both ghosts and heavenly officials are barred from rebirth. i do not think there's any novel basis that he xuan will be looking out for him, though -- if this is the same mxtx interview i'm thinking of, it's actually misinfo spread on tiktok. tbh, i don't think there's any novel basis that he xuan feels too terrible about what he's done to shi qingxuan in the first place. that's the whole point of his story imo: that he used to be such a hardworking, kind, and hopeful person, who was happy with his parents, sister, and fiancee despite the little they had. but the injustice of his life beat him down so much to the point that in his rage he emerges as a supreme-class ghost king who will hurt others the same way he was hurt without a care so long as it's for his revenge. i mean, what he does to the real ming yi, and later to shi qingxuan, reflects different aspects of what shi wudu did to him (stealing a person's identity and fate, and ripping a person's sibling away from them in a horrible way). he xuan is someone who's become so consumed by his hatred and resentment that, while he still retains a certain sense of fairness, he's still a fundamentally vicious and remorseless person.
as for what will become of he xuan, i personally think he'll either destroy his own ashes or will disperse eventually. he's had his revenge, and has nothing concrete tying him to the mortal plane anymore. i think the reason he's still around by the end is that he's unsatisfied with his vengeance, and that's because he didn't get to wring true remorse out of shi wudu; he was denied that vindication for his family. he never saw the moment that shi wudu truly understood how horribly he'd hurt him and his loved ones -- because shi wudu refused to feel that guilt. he refused to feel remorse over subjecting innocent people to such horrible fates, because he loves shi qingxuan too much to regret doing what he did to protect him. i also think he's deliberately trying to hurt he xuan as much as possible even in his death -- his cruel declaration that he's won, that no matter what he xuan does to him or his brother now, they're the ones who lived for centuries in prosperity and godhood and nothing he xuan does can undo that -- was a colossal and pointed middle finger, an indication of his refusal to give he xuan the satisfaction. and he xuan absolutely hates that shi wudu never felt sorry, even until the end.
i do think that he'll eventually make his peace with his revenge and how unfulfilling it was, though. i mean, there's nothing else he can do. and if that happens he'll have truly let go of the last thing keeping him in the world and will disperse. if he can't make that peace, as i said, i think he would destroy his ashes. it's once again a matter of there being no other path forward for him, because he's had his revenge, however unsatisfying it was, and he has no way of meeting his family or miao-er again. if he continues to stay around there'll be nothing but misery and grief and dissatisfied emptiness for him, and i just don't think he xuan would care for an existence like that. it would take him a while -- a very long time actually, i think -- but imo he'd commit ghost suicide eventually
as for whether shi wudu deserved it... i am a he xuan stan. he is by far my favorite character in tgcf aside from hualian. he deserved to do worse to shi wudu... is what i'd say, but that's my love for him talking and the fact that i just sympathize with him more than i do with shi wudu despite both of them having their reasons, and i'll explain why: his and his family and fiancee's sheer powerlessness in the face of their circumstances was so intrinsically tied to their lower class that it always gets me. especially his sister and miao-er -- they were forced to become sex slaves to a rich family, and no one was able to do anything about it because this family had wealth and power. his sister killed herself, unable to bear the suffering, and miao-er was beaten to death. given that these sort of class dynamics are unfortunately very real issues that lead to very similar occurrences irl, it's just something i have to feel veryyy strongly about.
from the standpoint of impartial analysis of the text though, i think the more accurate answer is that... well, there really isn't one. shi wudu was wrong for what he did to he xuan and his family, nobody can argue against that -- but would you not also go to any horrible lengths you could to protect your little sibling? in fact, didn't he xuan go to very similar lengths to avenge his little sister, and his parents and fiancee? at their core, he xuan and shi wudu become the same type of ruthless, uncompromising, singleminded person who will do whatever they feel is necessary for their loved ones, and not feel guilt for it. whether i wish shi wudu's death had gone differently, it's the same deal. shi wudu's defiance until the end and his mocking of he xuan does grind my gears, but that's again the biased he xuan stan in me talking. once more from an impartial standpoint, it makes perfect sense narratively that shi wudu would act the way he did. he and he xuan are parallels. they're supposed to be very similar to each other. he xuan feels no remorse -- not for what he did to the real ming yi nor for what he did to shi qingxuan -- and shi wudu feels no remorse, either. so yeah, the "he xuan did nothing wrong!!!!!" blinking neon sign in my brain aside, i think shi wudu's death scene is perfect from a thematic perspective. i wouldn't change it, because that would tamper with the message of the blackwater arc and the message of, and the dynamic between, he xuan, shi wudu, and shi qingxuan as characters.
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kanonavi · 1 year ago
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hello new mutual navi <3 what are your thoughts on tgcf <3 <3 <3 <3 <3
Hiiii new mutual Star <3 It's nice to hear from you, even though Hua is a menace and is terrorizing us <3 <3 I'll have you know I was at orchestra rehearsal and was unable to defend myself from their vicious attack, this was all very rude of them lol
But yeah tgcf omg.... I have so many thoughts about it tbh. For reference, I'm currently 6 volumes in (7 is in my possession, just waiting on my roommate to finish it first. If I read past him he'll get sad) and have watched all of the donghua so far and it's like. There are few things that I have felt more like the Target Audience for. My roommate clocked me for this, so this entire thing is his fault and now I've read 6 entire not-insubstantial novels in half a year.
To get the obvious part out of the way, I adore hualian, and out of all of my ships I think they're the closest I've ever gotten to loving both characters in it equally. Like in xiaoven I have a bias for Venti and in xingyun I have a bias for Chongyun, but with hualian I really and truly struggle to pick a favorite. If I had to choose, Xie Lian would probably win out just barely over Hua Cheng, but probably only because we're in his head for the books and thus get to experience his silly thoughts and awful trauma firsthand. However, they are rightfully a set, do not separate in my mind.
I do have a favorite character outside of the main pairing though and that character is Shi Qingxuan and I love her so so so so much it's not even funny. My roommate didn't predict this even though Qingxuan and Venti are so incredibly same guy, it's like. Of course I, renowned Venti enjoyer amongst my compatriots, was going to love the character who's the master of the wind, is a bit silly goofy, enjoys their drink, and also has a cool Gender going on. I have, however, been cursed (blessed) by my roommate's takes about her that don't seem very fandom mainstream, so I am just going to be content rotating her in my brain endlessly. She is in the microwave. Also, it's been an absolute treat watching her in s2 of the donghua, she is everything to me.
The last thing I'll add for my bare minimum thoughts about this series is that I do actually like it for very similar reasons that I like Genshin Impact. In Genshin, I've always been very fond of the immortal characters because I love the way that the writers at mhy explore the humanity of inhuman characters. The Gods and Dragons and Adepti and God-made Puppets and otherwise in Genshin aren't human, but the struggles that they face are incredibly human, whether living like and alongside humanity is one of their goals or not.
Tgcf, with its humans (exceptional humans, but still humans) that ascend to godhood, is much the same to me. Most of the Upper Court officials are completely detached from humanity much of the time, but their struggles and their vices are completely and totally human. Xie Lian is the most interesting of them all to me, since he's used his godhood to live the human life that he was never allowed when he was actually human, and I could go on an entire rant about that but I'll spare you the details. Every character in the series is so interesting in the way that their human problems have been left to grow and fester over the course of the centuries, and it's both awful and enthralling to watch.
oops that was so long my head is very full of thoughts. Thank you for the ask, even though it was kind of an arranged playdate lol I appreciate the chance to ramble <3
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spockandawe · 1 year ago
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this might be a longshot but do you know any transmigration cnovels with trans characters in them? or just cnovels in general tbh transmigration is not a requirement
Oh man, this has been sitting in my inbox for a while because I really wanted to pull together some good recs for you, but it is.... a lot harder than I expected to differentiate between some of these books. The broadest catchall tag on novelupdates looks to be "gender bender," which isn't the most clear starting point. If I haven't read something, the tags on novelupdates aren't always clear on whether any given story is 1) crossdressing, 2) body change that will be undone eventually, or 3) body change that the character is at peace with. And if there are any characters who are trans and aware that they're trans, I could not find a relevant tag, and the book descriptions were not helpful. There are tags for "male to female" and "female to male," but like before, it's really unclear which of the above categories the book will fall into. I saw a tag for "genderless protagonist," but skimming the tagged books, it was hard for me to tell if that meant anything like what I would hope for.
That being said, I hate to leave this with a complete shrug. Let me start with some low-hanging fruit! Terribly sorry if you've heard of these examples before, they're not very obscure. From books I've read or bound: TGCF/Heaven Official's Blessing, the supporting character Shi Qingxuan has some gender things going on. There isn't a definitive answer as to what exactly that entails, I've seen a variety of headcanons including that SQX is nonbinary or a trans woman. I default to they/them myself, but I've seen some LOVELY thoughts about this. Then, in JWQS/Clear And Muddy Loss Of Love, the protagonist is born female, but is living life is a man, including irreversible body modification in order to pass more convincingly (for revenge reasons). The story uses she/her in the narration, but it could easily be something more complex if you wanted to read it through that lens. And then in 2ha/The Husky And His White Cat Shizun, there's a supporting character doing a similar born-female-living-as-a-man-with-body-mods thing. I can't say that it's a story about trans experiences, but it is definitely easy to read with an eye to gender.
And then, these are entirely unvetted, but here are some novels from my attempted NU search that looked like they maybe had potential. I think all of these seem to be 'I got dumped into this body that doesn't match my nominal gender, but it's cool', rather than trans stories, so please don't trust my recs too hard, but I can't believe how hard it was to search for this!!
Demon Sword Maiden
Reborn As My Love Rival's Wife
Fugui Ronghua (short, but complete)
Even If I'm Reborn As A Cute Dragon Girl, I Will Still Make A Harem
Dominion's End
Reborn, I Became A Male God (only three chapters translated, but MTL is out there)
it is shockingly hard to tell what I'm getting into from these tags and summaries, jesus. I hope those recs aren't all completely off the mark, but it's really hard to gauge their content without reading them myself. If other people have recs, I'd love to hear them in the comments! I feel like there must be authors who have tackled some of these themes, and I'm disappointed that the tagging conventions make it hard to identify who those authors are :T
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incorrect-web-novels · 2 years ago
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Anyway, I’m back from the war (preparing refs for ArtFight), so here are my TGCF and Epic: the Musical thoughts: 
[MAJOR TGCF NOVEL SPOILERS]
Xie Lian���s story is pretty similar to Odysseus’s imo
“The blood on your hands / Is something you won’t lose / all you can choose is whose” (The Horse and the Infant) - this entire plot point is pretty much the “two people and one cup of water.” Just like Odysseus must kill the son of Hector, Xie Lian can’t deal with the war and provide war to Yong’an, and he chooses to prioritize Xianle/the people under him 
“If I became the monster…” is a different reason for blackening - Odysseus wants to protect his crew and family while Xie Lian isn’t protecting anyone at this point - but that song feels MADE for him tbh. The point where Odysseus repeats, “Oh, Ruthlessness is mercy upon ourselves,” (a point made by Poseidon), where he’s repeating Poseidon’s logic of not showing mercy compared with Xie Lian believing White No-Face/Bai Wuxiang’s philosophy after those infected by the Human Face Disease killed him over and over again
The “Monster” clip could also work for Jun Wu / Crown Prince of Wuyong (even better than for Xie Lian because he was still trying to save the people of Wuyong by sacrificing lives while Xie Lian didn’t really make an active decision to harm anyone until he wanted to release the Human Face Disease, which, again, wasn’t to protect others), but I don’t remember enough to make more of an argument / animatic
Mu Qing and Eurylochus are pretty different yet similar as well - they’re both willing to use “unscrupulous” methods and leave behind others - albeit Eurylochus is talking about leaving their men to stay as pigs on Circe’s Island, I believe, while Mu Qing is not really as cruel or selfish as he’s portrayed; he was prepared to sacrifice himself to save Xie Lian and Feng Xin at the end. However, like, Eurylochus, he’s “not as moral” as Xie Lian and Feng Xin (Odysseus and Polities in Eurylochus’s case) and leaves Xie Lian and Feng Xin during their exile. 
Idk if Mu Qing would confront Xie Lian the way Eurylochus confronts Odysseus in Mutiny though. He was weirdly excited about Xie Lian maybe killing someone (someone mentioned it a while ago; I don’t remember exactly) and seemed to want Xie Lian to be less “perfect.” Plus, Eurylochus is confronting Odysseus about running away from the sea monster Scylla, which I don’t see Mu Qing condemning. HOWEVER, Eurylochus’s doubt in Odysseus's leadership and ability to keep the crew alive is something I could definitely see in Mu Qing (source: just trust me, bro)
(To be honest, I don’t really get Eurylochus’s character that much - he’s upset Odysseus chose to run from Scylla, but he was all for leaving their men to Circe? - but those albums aren’t fully out yet, so it may make more sense later)
I refuse to believe Feng Xin would work as Polities though. It makes sense in all senses of morality, character function, and plot, but Feng Xin would not sing “Open Arms.” I refuse to believe it. 
Pei Ming has the same vibes as Hermes (“Wouldn’t You Like” and “Dangerous”) actually. I don’t have any clear reasoning, but it makes sense to me, yanno?
Speaking of which, while Jun Wu has similar vibes and ideologies to Zeus (“it is the will of the gods”) and Poseidon, if I had to cast anyone as Poseidon, it would HAVE to be Shi Wudu. 
“His title of ‘Water Tyrant was earned due to him capsizing any ship that did not give him offerings” (TGCF Wiki; Book 1, Ch.13) and “When a god comes down and makes a fleet drown, is he scared that he’s doing something wrong? Or does he keep us in check, so we must respect him, and now no one dares to piss him off?” (Monster)
“Shi Wudu considers death better than experiencing or watching prolonged suffering and pain” (TGCF Wiki; Book 3, Ch.124) and “I mean, you totally could have avoided this / Had you just killed my son” (Ruthlessness)
There’s probably more to say, but it’s ~5 am. I was prepared to sleep, like, 3 hours ago. If there are mistakes, no there aren't
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justkillthetitan · 1 year ago
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Using this post to dump my incomplete three-part series fanfic that's been living inside my head for a year and a half that I will never get to write because there's a 93% possibility I will never finish reading TGCF (despite the many spoilers I have read).
But before I do, I need to note that I am an SVSSS fanfic writer. I have not once even attempted to write MDZS fanfic, let alone TGCF. So for my series I chose to stick to LBH's perspective for the whole thing because I love him and I know how to write him (tbh, this whole thing is more SVSSS-centric for that same reason. Maybe of I had read TGCF I would come up with better ideas but that's not the case 😅). I thought out this whole thing when I was sure I would read TGCF.
Part One: Big Brother (yes, my titles aren't that original but I blame Airplane for that).
The story starts off before LBH's mother dies in the wee beginnings of PIDW. His mother is very sick and it's up to LBH to keep up with the house and take over her job washing clothes. This particular afternoon, he has gone to town to buy some food with the few coins he earned that week. On his way, he gets bullied by some rich kids (because he's the protagonist and he can't have a single nice day) he's bruised up but still very optimistic continues his way to the grocery shop when- fuck, what's that noise?
Turning around a corner, LBH sees a pair of kids not much younger then him (LBH is around nine here, WWX around eight, and HC is around seven or six. Their ages could be change to be much younger and fit their days in the streets in canon but I don't know if making then younger would be more fitting). The pair of kids are being chased by an agry dog. WWX is the one running frantically while he holds HC piggy style. LBH, feeling pity for them and scared because he's on the way of a an agry dog, takes a stick lying around the ground and chases the dog off. From this point on, LBH bassicly takes a look at WWX's and HC's sad state of dirt and clear hunger, and even thought he and his mom have absolutely nothing, he decides to take the kids back home! (Because he's the protagonist and he's still a little sheep and he can't just let kids younger then him suffer).
So cue him coming back to his sick mom with a small bag of groceries and two sad-looking kids. She's like '???' but she will not kick them out because, well, she adopted LBH because she didn't want him to he live in the streets.
From this point on there's a lot of LBH struggling to bathe this kids + cooking for them + bonding time with the new unoficial siblings.
Did LBH planned to adopt them? No. But when he learns they bassicly have nowhere to go and no one else wants to stop them, he ends up doing it himself.
So now they become a family. Yes, they struggle but they somehow make it work. LBH and WWX bassicly have to go find work to bring food on the table while HC stays at home taking care of LBH's mom (I have no clue wether they would ever considered LBH's mom their too. I lean towards no).
Until she dies.
And they get kicked out of their home.
So now, they are three orphaned homeless kids with nowhere to go.
For months, they live on the streets doing odd jobs to buy food or resolving to stealing to not die. They find shelter in every corner they can find, but it's very obvious that they need to find a more stable source of food and permanent shelter if they don't want slavers to take them.
So when CQM Sect opens it's doors for new disciples, LBH knows he has to try. WWX is still too young to take the exam with him, but if LBH manages to get in, he might be able to convinced his sect leader to let them take the test earlier. Nonetheless, the plans is a) become a disciple to b) provide his brothers with some food.
LBH finds them a little cave at the bottom of a mountain to stay in while he goes to take the test. His brothere are hyping him up with 'you can do it!' and stuff like that. Hr says bye to them and takes the test.
He gets in (of course he does) and now his Shizun is none other then Shen Jiu. While he's a little beat down about the tea incident and sleeping in the woodshed, he optimistically (and worryingly) decends the mountain to check on his siblinds. He brought with him some food he managed to get from the kitchens.
He finds nothing.
There's no trace of their little home or trace of his brothers were there. No note or sign of where they left. He inmediatly panics and goes to look for them in town. He can't find them but bystanders tell him that they saw a pair of kids leaving down three days ago. Aka, they left willingly? No one kicked them out of town?
LBH is on the verge of leaving to go look for them when the woman more or less tell him not to be stupid. If his brothers had left willingly it must have been for a reason (aka, not to burden their brother who has a solid chance of doing something meaningful by having him steal food from the kitchens to keep then alive, or beg to rich ass men to take them in) and that he shouldn't hurt his one oportunity to climb up the ranks and become powerful. Besidea, they could be anywhere by now so he probably won't find them.
And LBH... stays. He goes back to QJP to be abused by SJ all while having the goals of becoming poweful and established to go look for his brothers.
And years later, SJ gets a qi deviation and SY trnamsigrates.
Part Two: Middle Brother (gotta keep the names consistent)
By the time this part takes place, SVSSS and MDSZ have takeb place already (HC has already died if I am not mistaken).
So to explain how the stories all happen in the same planet and the same universe yet no one is aware of the other:
The planets is big as fuck and there's no internet so how is LBH/SY suppossed to know that a war in some far-away place that didn't even affect the plot even happened? They don't.
So on one of their many travels post-canon, LBH and SY make this trip to this far-away place where apparently sect exists but no one is immortal due to some scientifical reason I am not about to explain nor think about (also, sex pollen is not a big thing here? SY is thrilled). No one here know about who LBH is so that's a plus too but there's quiete a few cultivation sects SY is intrigued by.
Anyways, so LBH is standing in the middle of a busy market (SY is buying some stuff) when the bark of a dogs is heard. Next thing he knows, he's dodging the body of a man that's running straight at him. The man climbs over another man dress in white robs and cries about the dog that wants to murder him "Lan Zhan, save me from the beast!" (the dog only wants pets). This Lan Zhan shushes the dog away.
Now, LBH usually wouldn't care about what happens to other people, but the reaction of the man in black striked him as familiar. It reminded him of his long-lost brother (who he has never been able to find). The fright of dogs and the overflow of energy. It makes him inmediatly sad so he keeps looking at the couple for quiete a few minutes until the dude in black is like, 'do you like what you see?' (In his melancholic state, LBH hadn't even noticed the PDA and oh- so they are cutseelves too?).
LBH tells him 'no, weirdo. I have a husband that looks way better then either of you' so they start an argument (WWX doesn't take it seriously; LBH does). That is until LZ intervenes and... calls this guy Wei Ying?!?!?!?!
LBH is to stunned to speak because- well- there's no way this dude- they don't look alike-
So LBH stops them before they can walk away and mors or less screams 'WAIT SO ARE YOU WEI YING AS IN HOMELESS WEI YING AS IN SCARED OF DOGS WEI YING' WWX says yes, LBH screams 'WHY DO YOU LOOK DIFFERENT' as SY arrives to the scene.
And... that's when WWX more or less explains the 'so this war happens and I died and I got revive and-'
LBH is horrified AND traumatized (SY feels happy, he can finally bond with someone over dying and coming back to life!).
Things naturally spiral into WWX giving him a run down of his life + explaining why he and HC left + explaining that at some point they got separated and oopps, he has no idea where their little brother is.
LBH cries multiple times (what do you mean all the people I love die or dissapear?) and breaks down the whole 'so turns out I am a heavenly demon and I have this big ass empire that you don't know about' and 'I married my Shizun because I wanted and I can' and 'I am more or less considered a terrorist'. WWX looks kinda exciting. I mean, it wouldn't hurt to run some experiments on a heavenly-demon, right? Countless people hate you? Twins! And, holly fuck, your husband is immortal? What the fuck? Why is Lan Zhan not immortal????
If you are wondering, yes, LBH looks at LZ like 'you might have married my brother but are YOU worthy of him' + he gives LZ the shovel talk. LZ takes all of his very calmly.
LBH is introduced to SZL and- he's inmediatly crying because he has a nephew(kinda)? He may have daddy issues but he sure as hell doesn't have uncle issues and he's ready to become the best uncle this world has ever seen and oh my god, Shizun should we get a child???? Then JL comes in the picture and, well, since he's WWX's nephew then that automatically makes him JL's uncle either way- ("Binghe, that makes no sense" , "Shizun please").
On the other hand, LBH introduces them to MBJ and SHL (aka, his friends) and SQH. (SQH is confused but then... wait, this story sounds familiar...).
Anyways, the rest of the fic is all of them bassicly bonding and trying to find HC. Fluff and more silly moments.
Until.
As the years go by, LBH and SY don't age but WWX and the MDZS crew do. For some reason, cultivators living in this area aren't able to become immortals so LBH is forced to see this new family he acquired aged with every year. His search for his missing brother comes back empty and by the time WWX dies, the brothers have never reunited.
Part Three: Little Brother (aka, the part I struggle with)
Seven hundred or so years have gone by and LBH's perfect husband SQQ has officially ascended to the heavens after a massive layoff. (Psst, LQG also ascended! Probably the rest of the peak lords too? I feel like SQH would decline the promotion because he retired a long time ago and isn't about to come out of his retirement).
They are both in this carriage discussing the plans they have to celebrate and the upcoming party in the heavens to celebrate the new officials (not sure if they do something like that but, uh, they do here).
Because I love angst, this day casually happens to be the anniversary of WWX's death so LBH is sad but not suicidal sad, is more like sad but happy to remember the good times (or maybe his memory starts to fade? It all depends on how much angst you want there to be). SQQ tries to cheer him up reminding him of the part! (Are demons welcome to heaven? Possibly not. Is that about to stop SQQ from sneaking in his husband? Course not).
Flash forward, it's time to get ready for the party and LBH is helping SQQ get ready for the party when there's a knock on the door. Which is weird because LGQ usually just dramatically breaks the door so who the heck could that be? SQQ tells LBH to go hide for a bit while he goes investigate.
SQQ opens the door and... there's a ghost? Okay, a God and a ghost and tbh, this is not the weirdest thing he has ever seen (besides, the amount of, gossip he has become accustomed to is unimaginable. The heavens have their equivalent problematic couple like CQM does!).
So SQQ let's Hualian come in. They take a sit and XL asks him the most shocking questions he has ever been asked.
Are you stealing money?
Excuse me?!
XL proceeds to take out this map of the world (like, the entire world) and there's like some lil dots around CQM sect and some towns around the sect and XL starts explaining that all the dots in the map (aka, three) are all of SQQ's temples and he's not trying to be rude but he took a look at SQQ's equivalent of a bank account in havens and, well-
So everyone is concerned that their newly employed coworker is stealing or into some money laundry or tax evasion scheme because this dude is LOADED? And he has like three temples and there's no way this many people are giving him this many offerings in two week XL please go investigate.
And of course SQQ is MAD. Like, excuse me? Do you think I am so stupid I wouldn't be able to come up with a better way to commit money laundry?
Nonetheless, SQQ takes out his own version of the world map, except that the map is not bout the human realm... it's the demonic realm. There's Ghost City there and Hell and idk, some other places, and there's this big BIG portion that's just "LBH's Empire" and inside that portion of the map there are THOUSANDS of dots. There are more dots on that map then there are McDonald's in the USA.
And so SQQ explains to him that 'yo, I am married to this emperor who basically forced everyone on his empire to make thousands of temples dedicated to me the moment I ascended.' He's also got to explain how whenever a demon comes in court with a problem the first thing that LBH asks them is how many offerings they have dedicated to the empress and based to that answer he decides whether or not to help them.
So at this point it's a lil awkward and SQQ is like, 'so, wanna meet him?' and calls LBH to come out of his hiding spot.
They all seat together. It's awkward. SQQ more or less introduced each other and gives a half-ass apology for sneaking in a demon lord inside the heavens and blah blah blah.
All the while, HC is looking at LBH expectably. LBH is '???- oh, wait, I know you!'
"Shizun, he's that butterfly boy from that statue!"
"Binghe, don't say it like that!"
So LBH does know HC but not as his little brother. He recognizes him as the guy who rules Ghost City from a trip he and Shizun took one time (yes, SQQ got wife plotted and dragged into Ghost City to uncover the whole 'lost younger brother' plot but even though LBH and HC talked for like three seconds, LBH did not recognize HC and left to save his bride).
HC is incredulously looking at him. "Really dude?"
And LBH is like 'yes dude, did you know I was going to conquer Ghost City and add it to my empire but then I got married, and getting more land means spending less time with my husband?'
I imagine HC just baffled because, HC KNOWS.
Okay, so to explain this part basically: HC has known for a few years that (post WWX death) that LBH is his lost older brother from that one time he was kidnapped by WWX. He knows cuz he went to investigate when he heard about emperor LBH and he tried to approach this dude but.. LBH never recognized him. At all. Or maybe he did but he just decided he wasn't interested in HC because, I mean they only spent like two years together?
But like, no. It's just that how is LBH suppossed to recognized his seven year old brother in the body of a full-grown adult?? Hello???
So HC starts to ask questions about their lives to, you know, maybe see what the fuck has going on in their lives and see if Song of Bingqiu is a legitimate source of information.
So LBH tells him all about SVSSS and the whole 'so my husband as died like four times on me, ain't that crazy?' then starts to tell him about his other brother WWX and his family and then FINALLY, he mentions that he spent his first hundred years looking for his other brother but he was never able to fin him so he has given up because he might have died as a regular human : (
So the big reveal happens and HC gives him a quick rundown of his life (aka, getting separated from WWX then ending up in this other kingdom and meeting XL and dying and-) And of course LBH cries because, what's up with everyone in his life dying? And Mr. Brother-In-Law, have you died too?
Anyways so stuff happens. They bond. HC bullies LBH. LBH tells him about WWX death and damn, you didn't see him in ghost city?
And I was gonna leave it at that. Aka, the brothers never meet because I like angst BUT writing Shenanigans of the three of them would be so much fun so by some miracle (aka, a device or forgotten plot by Airplane) makes it so that HC and LBH are able to travel to wherever the souls of people rest (I have no idea if ghost city is this, I think not) where they reunited with WWX and now they can all meet each other's family and basically explain their crazy lives to each other.
The end.
On another note, I always thought the whole "SQQ is married to a demon emperor and not committing tax fraud" would be funnier if SQQ basically asks for a vacation to go home but then everyone sees that this novice god is inside this tyrant demon lord's house and oh my god, gotta go rescue this guy. So XL and co appear at LBH's palace and they break down the door LGQ style just to find SQQ and LBH standing in their pajamas like 👬 wtf and uh, that's how they find that out.
Fic Prompt
Au where Hua Cheng, Luo Binghe, and Wei Wuxian were all street kids together and were friends. Luo Binghe was the oldest and kind of the leader of the group and Hua Cheng was the youngest.
As their stories start, however, they all get separated.
Later on, past the canon of all three books, they all run into each other again.
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profmori · 3 years ago
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Hi......if you don't mind me asking, can I ask, who are your top 5 favorite characters from TGCF? And why? And what are your top 5 (or top 3) fav moments from the novel? Sorry if you've answered this question before.....Thanks.....
HELLLO !!!!! THIS IS SO CUTE AND AHHH
ITS A HARD QUESTION i literally love all the characters so much fuck so to pick top 5 feels like a punishment fjfkssk
1. Mu Qing : cause duh he's best boy. plus i relate to him in alot of way. ive done many things in past that he also did in the novel that make me feel less shitty about myself. both of us tend to come off people who only think about themselves, so it was nice to finally resonate with someone.
2. Xie Lian : i like how realistic he is and how he was portrayed in all the glory and in all the bad stuff. something about him is so insanely human that it doesn't feel like im reading a fictional character. especially in book 4 with everything that was happening it felt good to see a character break apart in all the ways possible and hit rock bottom. (plus both of us are shit cooks meant to be fr)
3. Hua Cheng : he's a bastard. so am i. we will get along. Also i really like that he didn't become a blind dog after xie lian, during the time they were apart hua cheng grew as his own person and found new perspectives.
4. Yin Yu : i just desperately want him as my best friend he's literally so cool and calm most of the time (ahem, leaving behind that one go die scene but it's fair) imagine being able to work in the paradise manor with him ahhhhhhhh
5. He Xuan : i really don't have any big words to say for him and except he gets to live in the ocean and has skeleton fished as pets that's enough to make anyone cool in my eyes. also he's such a mood, my man is trying to stay out of trouble and just eat but here comes his butterfly bff crying about his crush.
HONOURABLE MENTIONS : SHIN QINGXUAN, FENG XIN, PEI MING, LENG WIN, LORD RAIN MASTER, QI RONG, I LOVE THEM ALOT SOBS
(honestly all the characters are awesome it's really hard to pick wjdjwke)
And my top five moments from the novels
1. Xie Lian getting drunk and sleeping in an empty grave.
2. Hua Cheng punching He Xuan three feet underground for no reason at all.
3. Mu Qing's confession (the fact that he immediately jumped off in lava afterwards)
4. THE CONFESSION SCENE SCREAMS (the whole cave of ten thousand gods tbh, nothing beats it)
5. When Xie Lian had nail in his foot and hua cheng was scolding him and taking care of him
thank you for the ask !! it was very fun :D sorry if i was all over the place i just woke up ho ho
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fixielixie · 4 years ago
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in my completely biased opinion, out of all the mxtx villain discourse, the one i think who would not only the most redeemable but who would also be the most interesting if so, is shen jiu. like i said, my opinion is completely biased because i think shen jiu is already so interesting as the awful bastard that he already is, so i also like to sit around and think "would it be possible for shen jiu to be Less awful than he is, maybe get him up to the bare minimum of decent." and because i spend so much time thinking about it, yes i do think its possible.
the reason why i think shen jiu is the most redeemable outta the mxtx villains (tho tbh im not as invested in tgcf so feel free to fight me) is because the likes of jiang cheng and xue yang are just like fundamentally shitty people. like from birth they were always kinda shitty and it just got worse as they got older. and i dont think theyd be much fun if there were 'good' people, actually no i do think xue yang would be completely unhinged no matter what, i just dont care about him enough to give it much thought so hence, /biased/ opinion.
shen jiu is also predisposed to being a little fucking shit, even in childhood and i think it has nothing to do with his awful living situation. hes the type of kid who would see that you want to play with a toy and specifically chose that one to make you cry and then try to kid!gaslight you like "you only wanted it because i was looking at it youre not allowed to cry about it!!!!"
but i think in a more stable environment, as in, not growing up in slavery, shen jiu could learn to be a somewhat decent person. you know the kind of endearing anti-hero whos still an asshole but not really. like a lot of his major faults come from growing up as a slave and then thinking he was abandoned and then having a literal serial killer as a teacher and finally being caught murdering students by the guy he thought abandoned him. like im surprised it only took luo binghe having a mother and being a good kid for him to become full out tyrannical. like before lbh he was just a Shitty Guy that no one liked, but lbh came around and triggered every part of his nasty little brain and was like "fuck this kid in particular, im sending him to hell."
i think theres a lot of moments in shen jius life that could have changed him from "awful nasty child abuser who enjoys inflicting pain on literal helpless children out of his own pettiness and jealousy" to "he's okay... i guess". i mean, the most obvious would be qi-ge somehow breaking him out of slavery or finding him quicker or yanno speaking to him. because i think knowing that the one person he cared about in the world didnt forget about him would have mellowed him out just a little.
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curiosity-killed · 4 years ago
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hua cheng, the accidental person
okay this is for @bodhimcbodeface because i can’t shut up and make this concise enough for discord. spoilers ahead yeehaw
this is...not comprehensive. i’ve written 11 tgcf fics and am generally a bit fixated on Hua Cheng as a character so. there’s definitely things missing but i tried to hit the main points that i thought of while writing? also obviously this is just my interpretation! i do not expect anyone else to be like “ah yes curio the sage is so correct i have changed my thinking on this” like go live your life with your own versions of hua cheng! this is just the hill upon which i have firmly planted myself and from which i refuse to be budged. as u do.
anyway, LONG explanation of my very niche and very uh self-indulgent, not-necessarily-support-by-canon hua cheng apologism LMAO
tl;dr: (this is really Too Long i’m sorry) I think Hua Cheng reluctantly becomes a person during his 800 years of searching, starting from a point where he views Xie Lian not as a person but as an immutable god and focus of devotion and developing into a person who doesn’t really acknowledge that he’s a person because realizing that you want to live and do things for yourself is scary and overwhelming at times, and he ultimately falls in love with Xie Lian during the novel itself as he recognizes and is in wonder of the humanity of Xie Lian instead of his divinity or absolute judgment.
POINT 1: Hua Cheng doesn’t actually fall in love with Xie Lian till the ox cart
but curio! you say, “my beloved!” he calls him his beloved! and the land of tender!!
shhh. IMO Hua Cheng is more Wuming than Hua Cheng for those 800 years. By which I mean, for most of that time he’s, at his heart, a nameless soldier trying to find and serve his crown prince/general/god. He still views Xie Lian as this perfect and immaculate figure—a sculpture, a painting, a work of art that is untouchable and immutable. And he’s utterly and wholly devoted to that figure but devotion is not the same as love
So Hua Cheng is searching and trying to serve Dianxia all these years and then His Royal Highness finally ascends and is a god again and Hua Cheng shows up in all his glory to give this power and strength and wealth to serve him and—
and he’s met not by a powerful and reckless martial god or an unstoppable calamity but by a young man dressed in bridal robes who lets Hua Cheng lead him up a darkened mountain, who doesn’t lash out with spiritual energy or a sword but instead, only eventually, with the cursed bandage he was carrying back in the darkest part of his life.
and i think that throws hua cheng. like he’s had this image of his god all these years, this divine painting made over and over and over again—and he carries that belief and devotion with him, but there’s a crack in the sculpture and the stone is starting to flake off to reveal a human underneath it
so he puts on an approachable, malleable, unassuming skin and finds xie lian collecting scraps and being a lil awkward, a lil bumbling, generous and kind — and i think hua cheng, after 800 years of knowing everything, having everything — I think he looks at this discovery with wonder
Bc tbc this does not mean Hua Cheng views them as equals. For him it’s like, dianxia has even more to him, is even more than I knew. He’s seen Xie Lian as the flower crowned martial god in all his glory and as the white-clothed calamity in all his horror — and now here he is, wonderful, multitudinous, and human
Meanwhile I don’t think Hua Cheng even views himself as a person really, much less a human.
also i mean. the internet & allo ppl prove time and time again that you don’t need love for horniness so. land of tender’s right out as proof on that
POINT 2: The Live For Me thing
so obviously and undeniably, using one person as a reason for living is....not healthy. Not going to argue that. but my take on it personally is that, when Hua Cheng’s a kid who really, actively wants to die and sees no reason for living, Xie Lian gives him a reason to keep going. he doesn’t have to live for himself—that’s too much, that’s too big of an ask—but he’s been given a command and purpose by the one person who’s been kind to him/whom he respects. it’s a little like... “My life has no meaning but my cat needs me to feed him and clean his litterbox and so I need to keep getting up and taking care of him even if I don’t see a larger intrinsic purpose to my life.”
and i think like...it’s easy to forget that for all of books 2 & 4, Hua Cheng is young. He doesn’t live past 18—he’s still like...a kid. And that’s not to say that teenagers/young adults can’t make moral and rational decisions but I’m going to be honest, when I was that age I contemplated joining the Air Force because of tuition assistance and the snazzy uniform despite the fact that I was a vocal pacifist and repeatedly got into arguments with teachers about school rules and conservative politics. It’s not like. The Most Rational and Mature Age, lbr. 
so Wuming is absolutely capable of looking at what Xie Lian is doing and being like “hey maybe war crimes aren’t a great idea” but he is young and traumatized and the one person he believes in, the one person who gave him a reason to keep going, is deadset on this task which tbh I don’t think either of them (or...necessarily...the society in which they live) views as war crimes in the modern sense (which isn’t to say that we as readers should view it any more lightly bc i think the narrative directly and firmly contradicts that idea) but as revenge, as an eye-for-an-eye. so, bad, but character-wise, I think it’s more nuanced than we sometimes consider
anyway back to the fixation on xie lian. i stand by the assertion that in those 800 years, hua cheng wasn’t exclusively focused on xie lian. like was finding and serving him his top priority? oh god yes. undeniably. there is no other version of this story. BUT eight hundred years is like....a lot of time. and i think in that time he started doing things for himself, even if under the guise of serving xie lian. hua cheng is curious and adventurous—he clearly likes to learn even if he plays it off as nbd—and i think he starts to realize that about himself in those centuries even if he doesn’t allow himself to acknowledge or consider it. 
POINT 3: Mt. Tong’lu in General
“okay, sure but what about the thousands of sculptures and murals of xie lian, curio. what the fuck about them.”
Yeah. FINE. okay we will DEAL with this. dealing with this is the entire reason i wrote “(like i do) in the tall grass.” 
disclaimer: this is probably not supported by canon! i also. Do Not care. My Ghost King Now.
so I have two general avenues I take with this:
going back to the devotion > love — when Hua Cheng reaches MTL, he’s seen xie lian beaten and cast down. what do gods need to survive? worship! we see throughout how important divine statues/portraits/etc. are throughout canon. in this interpretation, the cave is a concentration of all that worship in an effort to support and serve xie lian and hua cheng doesn’t view himself like...as part of it. the sculptures could have been carved by any hand so long as they are xie lian and the worship and devotion that goes into their making can support and bolster him.
my personal favorite version: amNESIA IN THE CAVES —okay i don’t have the text pulled up rn but y’know how Guoshi says Hua Cheng was almost dispersed, in terrible condition, etc., when he reached Mt. Tong’lu. so if baby boy is in terrible condition, barely hanging on, etc., then my immediate favorite option is that he doesn’t, at that time, have even the...uh threadbare sense of self he did in life/as Wuming and is running on only a vague and urgent sense of Something driving him—something he has to do, someone he has to serve—and in that case, the paintings and sculptures are part of his trying to piece together and process his memories as he can grasp them and figuring out who he is/what his purpose is. Is this canonical? PROBABLY NOT. and yet here i am. firmly planted on this hill
Also w/ MTL I think a thing that’s often skated over is the mortals, creation of E’ming, and his ascension. Which is important from a meta lens of Hua Cheng and Xie Lian vs Jun Wu but that’s not the point of this rambling monstrosity and i’m trying not to get too distracted. ANYWAY I think this is one of those times when Hua Cheng does something that he would probably excuse as like “well His Highness would’ve wanted me to” or “His Highness wouldn’t have been willing to sacrifice the mortals” because Xie Lian is still largely his moral compass—but it also is a peek at the complexity Hua Cheng doesn’t acknowledge within himself.
uh i got distracted anyway and no longer know what point i was making here. Hua Cheng Ascension Important....maybe i will remember this at some other point...
POINT 4: Live For Me (Revisited)
I sort of got distracted writing that point but anyway coming back to it now: I maintain that although Hua Cheng’s primary pursuit is protecting and serving Xie Lian he also does develop/realize his Accidental Personhood throughout his 800 years. this includes a lot of things, as previously stated, that are under the guise of serving Xie Lian (I’d put learning the Banyue tongue, finding out about the Gilded Banquet, collecting swords, beating the 33 officials etc., in this category) and things that maybe could be but...are not really (e.g., his friendship alliance with He Xuan, Paradise Manor* in general, the Gambling Den, learning the Wuyong tongue, bullying Qi Rong*, bullying FengQing*, playing with gold foil palaces, etc.)
(*these are ones that like...could be said to be for Xie Lian and I think he might say are for Xie Lian but also have a personal element that is just for him. 
Like yes Paradise Manor is a lavish and well-stocked residence fit for a god or crown prince...but it’s also a luxurious and extravagant collection of all the things he couldn’t have in life. it’s like giving a kid a credit card with no limit and letting them run wild through uh. Fuck. A Fancy Department Store. 
And sure Qi Rong was awful and turned on Xie Lian in pretty damning ways, but I also genuinely think part of Hua Cheng’s grudge with him is from the childhood abuse and from just...hatred that Qi Rong is around and looks like Xie Lian and gets to be there when Hua Cheng can’t find Xie Lian (which is about  Xie Lian but for Hua Cheng). 
Similarly with FengQing, sure a lot of his hate is for them abandoning Xie Lian—but he doesn’t even know till Book 3 when they abandoned him, and consider how much more he hates Mu Qing, the guy he blames for kicking him out of the army, etc. Some of it is totally “in service” to Xie Lian but some of it is because Hua Cheng carries a grudge like a goddamn pro and finds catharsis in beating the shit out of immortals who bounce back and can’t stop tripping over themselves and onto his blade.)
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zishustits · 3 years ago
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More TGCF comments before I forget
I've already read further than what I'm going to point out but for some reason I delayed it.
First, the painful stuff which I liked very much because it was kinda philosophical and relatable. Remember the conversation between Xie Lian and the girl Banyue after the Half Moon events? When they were at the Pu Qi shrine. They talked about dreams and ambitions they had when they were younger (and naive) and how they were different from their present personalities.
The first thing was Banyue reminding Xie Lian of the words he said, that he wanted to save the world, that if you fall you can get up again and if you try enough you'll succeed, etc. And Xie Lian was like omg I'm so ashamed, how could I ever be that stupid and have those silly ideas, definitely I was too naive back then. Then obviously he had a series of unpleasant experiences and tragedies that made those ideas lose their credibility and Xie Lian became disenchanted so he doesn't believe in them anymore (or rather doesn't want to believe, it seems to me, when he says something like "am I actually the kind of person who would have these ideas? I'm not like that, right?").
And then Banyue tells him she tried to do what Xie Lian taught her as she too felt it was the right thing to do but in the end teh results were disastrous, as they were for Xie Lian. So she asks him what is the right path to follow if not what Xie Lian told her, and none of them know. Then Banyue says she feels useless, having lived 200 years (I think?) with no good results of what she intended to achieve. As if she had not done anything good in all those years. And Xie Lian thinks to himself well, if you feel that way how should I feel then, having lived 800 years and not achieving any of my dreams (saving the world, making a good and significant change in the world as a Heaven Official, etc.)
And all this makes me feel a bit sad because it's so relatable too. Growing up and then looking at your past to laugh about how naive you were back then, with your ideals and dreams which are not always doable in reality (but this also applies to past beliefs that were rather oppressive for you or the others and you have left behind). And well, I'm still on my early twenties so I mostly don't think about omg I haven't done anything with my life and I've lived so much already (tbh sometimes I've thought like that and for some things I feel like it's too late to start with them but there are other things I've done/am doing so they kinda compensate each other) but probably in a few years these thoughts will start to haunt me more often, and also I believe a lot of people feel that way, whether they are older or younger. Like we've lost a lot of time doing nothing, or haven't achieved anything that matters. And that's not true. Not actually. Perhaps we've not done everything we'd like but we've done other things too, we don't have to make something big or small or whatever, as long as we live in a way that's meaningful to us (and each one has to figure out their particular idea of meaningful). But it's hard, I know. There's this idea so deeply engraved that we have to achieve great things. Anyways, if there's something you want to try, you are still alive, which means you still have the opportunity to try.
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baoshan-sanren · 4 years ago
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All these dramatic negative reactions to the tgcf live action, make me roll my eyes; they already made 2ha! Tgcf is not even remotely as issue-filled as that so if creators found a way through that (all hail empirial guqin player) then they'll find a way through tgcf!(I do mean violence parts too)Idk how far in love and redemption you are but that show got away with sliding crazy stuff by censorship too! I'm still amazed with what they got away with so everyone needs to calm down
okay but is one of the things they got away with liu yihuan working as a prostitute? i need to know for science
tbh i’m not really surprised at the negative reactions because everyone who loves a novel hates to see it retold badly 
but at the same time, altho there is overlap between fans of tgcf and 2ha (a shitton of my mutuals and friends love both) there is definitely a difference in expectations
2ha fans never expected to get an actual retelling of the book in live action format because... well, even hbo would have a hard time getting away with some parts of the novel
but it sounds like a lot of tgcf fans are afraid of artistic AND censorship changes combined. in other words, we can all accept that some things just... can’t be depicted on screen, shown, or talked about. but we’ve all seen that there are ways around that without hacking/changing/misrepresenting major plot points/relationships. 
for me, censorship/artistic changes that resulted in an addition of female love interests who didn’t exist in canon in tsomd was a shit deal. cql has shown us that a story can be told without this cop out, it just takes more care and effort.  and that’s def something I, personally, would not be happy about seeing in tgcf live action
i just think that cql, despite all the ways it diverged away from the canon work, was still a lovely and impactful adaptation in its own right, and there is no reason why tgcf couldn’t be the same if done right and with love, even if a good deal of it is restrained by censorship 
but in the end, even if we get a shit deal, it’s not the end of the world 
like @wangxianbunnydoodles said, at the very least, it will be a visually stunning live action au fanfic of a work we all love, and who wouldn’t want one of those? 
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razberryyum · 4 years ago
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TGCF donghua Ep 3 Thoughts (SPOILERS!)
Oh my God the hell I went through to just watch this episode. Waited all night for Bilibili to load it on their Youtube channel, only to have it buffer nonstop, then had to figure out how to register and join the VIP membership on the Bilibili website, only to end up accidentally buying a shit ton of B coins that I don’t know what the hell I’m going to do with since I only needed like 68 out of the hundreds I have to buy a long enough subscription for the rest of the season. If anyone has any idea what I can do with all these extra coins, please do tell me. Even if I kept them around for the next season of TGCF or Tianbao Fuyao Lu, I’d still have too many left. AARRGGGHHHH.
And you’re probably wondering, why go through all the trouble, it’s gonna be on Funimation the next morning. Tbh even though Funi said it’s in HD, the quality of the stream didn’t seem up to par, and plus...I just couldn’t wait. I’m like already that committed to this show even though I haven’t even read the book (I started again tonight though!). 
Was it worth all this trouble? Of course, yes. Look at this cutie. He’s worth every bit of my hard earned money and brain cells and energy.
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We got to meet a few more new characters which I’m sure we’ll see again in the future. I just have to say, good looks definitely run in the Pei family.
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I hope Pei Su’s not as much of a bastard as his ancestral predecessor (current boss?) Pei Ming. I don’t know if we’re supposed to think of Pei Ming in a negative light, maybe it’s all a misunderstanding, but right now I do think he wronged Xuan Ji just a little. Sure, it was her fault for getting too serious with the relationship when he already clearly told her he wasn’t into commitment, and it’s also her choice to betray her country for him AND destroy her own legs. HOWEVER, he could have handled that a bit better I guess? Unless I read the scene wrong, I take it he didn’t use the information she gave him to defeat her army, that he did it on his own strength and merit? But his coldness, the way he rejected her, when he knew she was in love with him...I just couldn’t help but feel bad for her. Although, then again, she did kill a lot of people in her wrath form so...I guess I shouldn’t pity her too much. Her victims were probably all innocent people...all those poor brides, life taken away on what was supposed to be the happiest day of their lives.  So sad.
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I have to say, seeing Pei Ming and Xuan Ji kiss on screen also made me feel a bit sad but for a different reason: because I know we will never get to see HuaLian have intimate physical contact like that on screen. I always feel that for danmei-based adaptations, if the main couple can’t physically express their love, then no other couple should be allowed to do anything more either. Just doesn’t seem fair otherwise, even if it’s something straight from the source material and it’s a completely valid relationship. 
But considering the curse Xuan Ji was trying to put on Pei Ming, now I’m dying to know if he does eventually fall in love. Feels like an obvious set up to future tragedy so I can’t wait to read to find out...unless the show actually gets to it first (but I somehow feel that’s doubtful).
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I had a feeling things wouldn’t end well for her and the boy, and I guess I was a little relieved that I was only half right, but still, I got teary-eyed when this moment happened. I loved that the donghua team had her pass away with her eyes open so that Xie Lian had to close them. Made the scene seem more real somehow. 
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I can’t wait to find out what his disease is all about since it’s related to Dianxia’s history. I remember seeing the name of the disease floating about once in a while, but I don’t even know if it’s a spoiler at this point to know that. Is it too much to hope that he survives and is cured of the disease? I’m already attached to the poor boy. (should I be?? God I can’t wait to read so I have more context for everything and I can be prepared to either get attached or not get attached to certain characters!)
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youareunbearable · 4 years ago
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Catch me not having a clue who any of these gods(?) and people are, but still sitting here like, "I ship that pretty one with the gruff one, and that brown haired one with the other(?) gruff one?" without knowing names or what this is except the fanart I see you reblog, because this fandom apparently has lots of nice art
Fam i have no idea what ur talking about or when u sent this im so sorry asfkjhfkjhf but i thiiiinnnkkkk??????? it’s “Heavens Official Blessing” or  Tiān Guān Cì Fú (TGCF for tagging stuff) its originally a chinese gay novel that is soooooooo long by the author  Mo Xiang Tong Xiu (MXTX) who wrote 2 (two?????) other novels that I know of that are also gay historical fantasy but i personally havent actually read TGCF???? im just watching the anime and looking at the wiki and reading fanfics so i have a vague idea whats going on but not really???? so i cant really give a good review BUT i LOVE THE CHARACTERS MXTX WRITES SO MUCH AFHAFKFHKFAKF IM SO SORRY IM SHIT WITH TAGGING SO U HAVE NO IDEA WHAT IM HYPER FIXATING ON BUT
LISTEN
LISTEN 
LISTEN
Pretty one and the gruff one im THINKING is He Xuan (or Ming Yi/ Ming-Xiong/Ming Bro) for the grumpy one and Shi Qingxuan for the pretty one and both are kinda gender fluid?? (more Shi Qingxuan but they both change their forms to be both women and men which is Iconic and the anime put her in the TRANS FLAG COLOUR instead of her canon white and green which is ICONIC) AND THHEYRE SO TRAGIC AND HOT AND I CRY JUST THINKING ABOUT THEIR STORY LIKE AFHDFKJAFDSGS like i want to kinda read the book just for them, the two super minor characters, but i also read somewhere that their story doesn’t really have a clean ending so im also holding back from just getting Emotionally Hurt because im a cancer and i know it’ll wreck me
I think The Two Gruff Idiots are Feng Xin (dark haired gruff boy) and Mu Qing (brown haired gruff boy) and theyre both martial gods and both knew each other for over 800 years and both tried to take care of Actual Human And Heavenly Disaster Xie Lian, failed, and tried to do it again 800 years later but with stupid glasses with moustaches in hopes that Xie Lian cant figure out that they care about him but OOPS Xie Lian does in fact have the braincell of the three of them fajfafjajf 
Heres the link to watch the anime, there are 11 eps rn but it updates every weekend (I dont actually know when but i watch it on sundays) Make sure u have ur ad block on tho lol there is a manga too and the art style is TO DIE FOR like its GORGEOUS but its roughly at the same pace as the anime so eh
Heres where to read the whole thing online, just a warning its BIG AS FUCK like 244? plus extras I think?? 
I’d also recommend MXTX’s other books!
Mo Dao Zu Shi (or Grandmaster of Demonic Cultivation/ The Untamed/MDZS) is both a Book as well as an Anime (the whole thing is on youtube) , a Live Action which you can watch on Netflix (look up Untamed, also a warning, the plot is a little different from the book and anime cause of uhhh censorship?? also i guess to make it more live drama friendly, my friends an i binged it and really liked it, but some of the fandom doesn’t), a manga which is not finished I think???? idk im not caught up, and a fucking chinese AUDIO DRAMA LIKE BITCH ITS SO WELL DONE but i have to stop listening sometimes cause like there is a difference between watching/reading characters kiss, and then like just hearing them, i get so embarrassed i have to skip the kissing scenes and god forbid i accidentally click on the smutty extras alfjajlfjalfjaljf u can find it on youtube, i linked the one i listen to but i havent finished it and i don’t think it’s all of it, but you can find other episodes/chapters easily
Its about 1 Dumb Yet So Smart gay/bi man (Wei Wuxian) who honestly tries his fucking best, fucks up everything, dies for over a decade, and then is forcefully brought back to life to solve a murder mystery with the guy who has been in Super Gay Love with him since they were teens (Lan Zhan), a bunch of teens Who Are Just Honestly Here For A Good Time And Yet (Lan Juniors, Jin Ling, and Best Boy Ouyang Zizhen ) while badly hiding his real identity from all the people he knows, including his foster brother (Jiang Cheng) who is out for blood and hunting his ass down with a whip and also Lan Zhan who is travelling with him. Also the Killer. There is a killer on the loose and is willing to murder whoever to keep their secrets. Also Nie Huaisang. I adore him and his brother Nie Mingjue, if there is one bitch u gotta remember from this summary it’s this little twink (he and his brother also have a fucking spin off movie from the live action drama THAT I HAVENT BEEN ABLE TO FIND A ENGLISH SUB VERSION AND ITS BEEN KILLING ME SINCE I STARTED WATCHING THIS SHOW LAST YEAR. GOOGLE GIVE ME MY FAVOURITE TWINK AND HIS BEAR OF A BROTHER HAVING A FUN FAMILY ROAD TRIP!!!!!!!)
My Personal Current Favourite is Scum Villain’s Self Saving System (SVSSS) which is SOOOOOOO FUNNY Like it’s not as popular cause the comic was discontinued, and the anime looks like its from 2005 with the weird 3D animation but its my current comfort media!!! 
Its basically about a spite reading millennial (Shen Yuan) who died after reading a REALLY awful popular cheesy smut harem novel (think like 50 shade series but worse cause the protag had 600 wives) and was forced into the body of a minor but important villain (the protagonist’s teacher, Shen Qingqiu) from the novel who was fated to die with all his limbs cut off and his eyes and tongue plucked out and is told he has to fix the story so its not trash, he reasonably freaks the fuck out and hugs the protagonists (Luo Binghe) thigh so hard he turns him gay without realizing. Sadly, he does have to make sure certain plot points happen, which fucks him over a lot,  and he thinks Luo Binghe still wants to kill him instead of love him cause he has the Emotional Intelligence of a Rock, but its so funny reading about him handling all the awful tropey stuff, like imagine u have to be a character in My Immortal But With Porn?????? without breaking out of character too much?? I wouldn’t be able to handle it ajhakfkfhjfj He also finds out that he’s not the only transmigrator in the novel either, but it doesn’t matter cause theyre both So Fucking Stupid Collectively but everyone would honestly die for the both of them
warning for this story though, the main relationship is a teacher/student relationship, but nothing happens until the student is in his 20s and also kinda not his student anymore cause he’s running hell??? but if that squicks u out i totally understand and offer you to PLEASE still enjoy some of this media, and instead of the BingQiu ship, I offer you the LiuQiu one, where both me and the main character cry over how a beautiful man/fellow immortal lord loves the main character so much that he literally fought every day for 5 years to be by his side and I Think Thats Beautiful and I kinda like this ship more than the main one tbh PLEASE just look at the art for Liu Qingge because i love him so much, he’s like if you took Lan Zhan and Jiang Cheng from MDZS and mashed them into one beautiful man the author is trying to tell me is straight but u take one look at him And Tell Me Otherwise
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spockandawe · 4 years ago
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I’m so unbelievably weak against characters who make terrible choices because they’re hurting and upset. I love the subtler resentful decisions that quietly build up ill will, and I love the big dramatic choices that end with everyone going down in flames. But more than anything, I love love love hurting myself with the emotional flavor of a character struggling with the tension of simultaneously realizing that people hate/mistrust them (or how much people hate/mistrust them, or which people hate/mistrust them), while also realizing that those people just have... no idea where they’re coming from.
I was thinking about this first because of Mu Qing, who is honestly a very low-key version of this scenario (and it’s also quieter since he’s not a lead character and rarely takes the spotlight himself). But the first big tgcf flashback honestly made my heart ache, seeing him trying to walk a line between maintaining his own independence/pride and not belonging to someone he wants to be peers with, but when he tries to be tactful, people decide he’s being shady.  He was picking cherries, to bring a treat to his poor mother (and the poor children around his home), but then got accused of stealing, and then didn’t want to say that it was because his only remaining parent was living in poverty. And it continues through the present day! He knocks out Feng Xin so he can save him from a burning city, because Feng Xin refuses to leave, and people are like ‘>:OOO MU QING ATTACKED FENG XIN??’ In some ways, this character hurts me more than the others, because he rarely does anything wrong, he has a bad attitude, but his most significant “missteps” tend to be like ‘you could have been a little more kind, tbh.’
But also too, I’ve been working my way through the svsss extras again, and... Shen Jiu. God, Shen Jiu. This character is agonizing, and I love him so much. He makes terrible choices! He does terrible things! He tries to set up an actual literal child to die horribly, because he resents that this child had a parent who loved him, and that he found his way to Cang Qiong young enough to reach his full potential! It’s absolutely unforgivable! But nobody except Yue Qingyuan has any clue how much Shen Jiu has been through and how to possibly help him grow or heal or how to support him into better decision making. And Shen Jiu is so hurt by the way Yue Qingyuan left him that he refuses to let Yue Qingyuan help him now. Like! This child was a slave, begging for food on the streets, then was sold to a rich boy who abused him in sexually-flavored ways and planned to marry him to his sister so he could keep him forever, and then his “rescuer” was a scumbag adult who taught him to steal and murder. 
And while Shen Jiu was suffering, he thinks Yue Qingyuan, who came from the same beginning and who promised to come back for him, was living in careless pampered luxury in a prestigious cultivation sect. Shen Jiu’s own self-evaluations are incredibly harsh, from the moment he’s reunited with Yue Qingyuan. He calls himself terrible, he calls himself a thing, and once it’s clear that he’s going to pay the price for his bad decisions, he tries hard to shove away the one person who cares about him and find some way to protect him. Yue Qingyuan never stopped loving him and defending him, but literally nobody else in the world has any sympathy for him whatsoever. How am I not supposed to be heartbroken? Shang Qinghua sighs over how his readers used to hate on Shen Qingqiu for having no motivations, which, sure, that’s understandable from what’s on the “Proud Immortal Demon Way” pages, but seeing the trauma driving his choices in svsss and seeing his own self-awareness and self-loathing and knowing that one (1) person in-universe has any inkling of his internal world (and that person died trying to help him), I’m! In pain!!!
Plus, in svsss proper, I saw a post in passing once that was something like... ‘readers are hard on luo binghe, because he’s the only mxtx protagonist where we see the worst decisions of his life and aren’t in his head to understand why he’s making those decisions.’ Which I still find fascinating, and think about often. It makes sense to me. And as far as my terrible-decision-making children go, he’s very interesting to me because he doesn’t really deal with the widespread distaste/mistrust that mu qing and shen jiu experience, it’s very much targeted on one person. I live for the parts of svsss where all Luo Binghe has to do is breathe, and Shen Qingqiu flinches and bolts. And Luo Binghe is not acting in kind or well-considered ways, a lot of the time! But he was seventeen, and his beloved teacher had told him that ‘humans can be good or evil, demons can be good or evil,’ but the moment Luo Binghe turned out to be half demon, even though he’d just been fighting desperately trying to protect Shen Qingqiu, that teacher he trusted more than anything immediately turned on him, stabbed him in the chest, and threw him into hell.
That’s agonizing!!!! Even without the aftermath, that’s agonizing to read! And when Luo Binghe comes back, years later, he’s upset, he’s hurt, he’s lonely, he’s still stinging from that betrayal, of course he’s not making good decisions. I follow good blogs, because I haven’t seen any terrible Luo Binghe takes on my dash, but I’m kind of :c that these takes apparently exist. Again, it’s not that I think he makes good decisions, but I can see why he makes bad decisions, and I can see other characters missing that context, and I am rolling in terrible, glorious pain. Luo Binghe shows up secretly in Huan Hua Palace and starts taking it over and generally acts shady as heck? Well, Shizun wouldn’t let him beg for forgiveness when he was a disciple, and he’s afraid to face Shen Qingqiu until he can meet him on a semi-equal footing. Luo Binghe gets angry and spiteful when Shen Qingqiu asks if he’s responsible for the sowers? Yes he does! He’d always, always tried to do right by Shen Qingqiu, and trusted Shen Qingqiu when he said demons could be decent people, but the moment he turned out to be half-demon, Shen Qingqiu immediately started expecting the worst from him at every turn. It hurts! I don’t blame him for acting on that hurt! And I am so endlessly compelled by the way that Shen Qingqiu completely fails to recognize the context for where Binghe is coming from.
And like... I cannot leave out Xue Yang and Jin Guangyao. Xue Yang is fascinating in his own way, because the steps are... a lot more explicit and clear-cut than some of these other characters. Shen Jiu’s downward spiral is very internal and he curls up tight to hide his weak spots even with the person who values him most in the whole world, but Xue Yang very plainly tries to lay out his reasoning for his most important person. His whole world is crumbling by the time things reach that point, and it was probably beyond salvaging, but god! He tries so hard to explain the position the world placed him in, from childhood onward, helpless and vulnerable, and that nobody was going to defend him except himself. 
But when Xiao Xingchen doesn’t understand what he’s trying to communicate, when he realizes that the person he values most isn’t willing to hear what he’s trying to say, he starts lashing out again and trying to hurt. It’s the same lesson he learned when he was young, in some ways. ‘If I’m stupid enough to trust you, you’re going to use that to hurt me.’ And then the logical next step, ‘If you’re going to hurt me, all I can do is try to hurt you worse.’ You can see the trauma playing out right there on the page, and it’s agonizing. I can understand some people not enjoying reading things that make them hurt that way, but I have trouble Getting it when people don’t at least find that kind of dynamic compelling as hell. I’ll sometimes avoid media that I know is going to make me sad, but if I’m in the mood to Experience Sadness, I know a dynamic like this is going to grab me by the heart and shake me like a ragdoll.
And... Jin Guangyao. He was on my mind too, partly because I’ve seen a few takes on his motivations lately that honestly kind of baffle me? Like, to each their own, especially since mdzs never takes us inside his head. But I see posts that like... he was bullying Nie Mingjue, or what if Lan Xichen could Tell he was never genuine and mistrusted him on some level, and how to put this. It’s not that I agree with the choices he made, though I really don’t want to play fandom purity police in any way, shape, or form (murder is good, actually), but I understand the choices he made enough that those sort of interpretations that skew towards the cruelty-for-the-sake-of-cruelty territory honestly kind of upset me.
There’s some interesting comparisons to be made with Mu Qing, in some ways. They both grew up poor, without a father, in “shameful” single-parent situations (a sex worker mother vs. a father being executed for being a criminal). They were poor boys with ambition, but no matter how they tried to carry themselves with dignity, those poor beginnings were rubbed in their faces, years after the fact. I think it does make a real difference that Mu Qing’s shame is mostly based in his own history (sweeping floors) while Jin Guangyao’s is more external (son of a whore), and that Jin Guangyao’s also insulted a parent who he loved dearly, and that Mu Qing was seeking the respect outside of famiial structures while Jin Guangyao was desperate to be accepted by his father.
There’s so much of Jin Guangyao’s early life that’s like ‘I’m Just Trying To Live My Life, My Dude,’ and it hurts me to watch. He really didn’t have goals that were all that excessive! If his goals were excessive in some way, it’s only by virtue of how highly ranked his father was, which isn’t his fault. His goal: ‘I want my father to accept me into the family.’ What the world saw: “oh my god, this son of a whore SERIOUSLY wants to be brought into this noble family, lmaooooo.’ There are characters who are more compassionate than that, and a lot of that reaction is down to the nature of the setting, but LORD, man! It’s honestly a pretty restrained goal for a kid to have! Especially when his father totally promised to come back for him someday, and he waited patiently for years before setting out on his own.
And even once he gets kicked down the steps of Koi Tower and dials back his ambitions, he gets so little space to breathe. He’s learning cultivation late, he takes a position as a nobody in a different cultivation sect, he’s just trying to live. But no matter how he rolls with the punches, no matter how he smiles and bears it, he’s being constantly, constantly prodded in that old, painful bruise. I’ve been finally working my way through The Untamed, and it was painful to watch, in Gusu, when he’s trying to present the Nie Sect’s gift to Lan QIren, and people just start focking gossiping about him, right there, perfectly audibly. And when we see him back in Qinghe, he’s perfectly polite and deferential, and that one disciple is still like ‘fuck you, ur mom was a whore.’
He makes bad decisions, but even when he makes good decisions, he can’t win. I don’t get anything from him at all that suggests he had Hugely Lofty Ambitions from a young age, he just wanted some kind of decent life, but almost nobody would cut him a break. Nie Mingjue did cut him a break, and Lan Xichen was gentle and kind to him, and that made such an impact on him. But I also think it made it that much worse, when he made later questionable decisions, and Nie Mingjue refused to let him explain himself. Nie Mingjue’s rigidity breaks my heart in lots of ways, but especially when it comes to Jin Guangyao. I don’t want to make this all about personal attachment, but it’s kind of inescapable in this situation. Nie Mingjue sends him a loud, violent message that if he’s not perfectly morally upright, he’s Done. But by now, Jin Guangyao has years of history of people being cruel to him based on a history he never was able to control. Nie Mingjue protected him, but hes made it clear that protection was... conditional. There could be arguments about how conditional, and what the non-murdery limits would have been, but the murder has been done, and it was already clear that Nie Mingjue never had the power to protect him from everything.
I can’t read Jin Guangyao’s later actions without also reading that fear and insecurity into his decisions. He even tries to say it outright, that he’s afraid of everyone and everything, and Nie Mingjue misses the point. Jin Guangyao hurts me a lottle, because he suffers both in terms of the general public’s judgment of him, but also in the judgment of someone he cared deeply about. I can see the reasoning and trauma, but so many other people in the story can’t. Jin Guangyao gets pushed to the edge by how his father holds him at arm’s length from the family, the atrocities he tells Jin Guangyao to commit on his behalf (and then maybe I’ll treat you like my actual son, maybe), but when he tries to express that, Nie Mingjue is like ‘can’t you just endure more, though??’ He builds a temple with a statue with the face of his dead beloved mother, and the public is like ‘omg, he made that statue with his OWN FACE, can you believe it??’
In some ways, the way Lan Xichen determinedly loves and trusts him makes it all hurt even worse. I absolutely believe Jin Guangyao when he says that he never once wanted to act against Lan Xichen. So many of the terrible decisions Jin Guangyao makes tie so directly to him seeking either safety or security. But he works hard in social gatherings to keep the peace and people think he’s two-faced. He endures years of mistreatment before hitting back and people judge him for hitting back at all and say that well, what else could we have respected from someone with that background. Nie Mingjue threatens to kill him multiple times, and he was a very straightforward, honest man, of course Jin Guangyao was frightened of him and decided it was safer to see him dead. I live for the pain of seeing a character I love make decisions I strongly disagree with, understanding why they’re making those decisions, and seeing other characters not understand, and simply hate them for the decisions.
This isn’t exactly new, this is why I’ll never be able to shake my love for Starscream, even if his quality of motivation... varies by continuity. And Pharma and Prowl are two of my favorite characters in all of idw1 for exactly this reason. I’ve got  at least three fics brushing up against Pharma’s resentment over ‘yes, i got ordered to run a hospital on a garbage planet I was sharing the most violent, sadistic decepticons in existence, I SURE WONDER WHY I WAS DRIVEN TO THIS DESPERATE POINT, BUT THE LOVE OF MY LIFE THINKS I’M JUST A TERRIBLE PERSON, SO I GUESS THAT’S THAT.’ 
And in the murderbot books, I genuinely get reduced to tears when murderbot has to deal with people compassionately interpreting its behavior instead of giving it no credit, the way its used to. I find the raksura books intensely, intensely satisfying in how Moon struggles to fit into a highly social, close-knit society after growing up so traumatized and alone, and how his colony gradually adapts to him and gets used to his quirks, instead of driving him out, the way he’s experienced so many times. No real conclusion here, I was just spacing out during a work training call, and got overtaken by how much I love characters who experience this particular flavor of emotional isolation.
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eohachu · 4 years ago
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Post pictures of your first ever (fictional/celeb) crush to the latest one and tag five others to continue the game.
Ali tagged me, thanks. I guess 😘 @lanzhansmiles​
A’ight so I’m simply taking this as an opportunity to show off my frankly impeccable taste 😌 *coughs into the crook of my elbow with my mask on and from a safe distance* More under the cut, godspeed!
I’m tagging uhh I really don’t want to expose anyone but uh. @morifinwes​ @ttaechwita​ @sunshine304​ @treemaidengeek​ @flamingwell​ no pressure tho!!
Since 2006
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Janina Fautz: Die Wilden Kerle, anyone?? Tbh i had a crush on quite a lot of the characters/actors but in hindsight Janina was and is the most influential one. Also probably my first ever girl crush (again, in hindsight bc it took me until 3 years ago to finally find out i’m queer lol)
Eva-Maria May: Yeah well I’m not gonna talk about where I know her from let’s say it was an incredibly bad soap opera my mom used to watch. She was one of the reasons why I went Yeah I Have Always Been Into Girls. I was pretty obsessed with her to the point where mini me secretly printed out a photo of her to look at lmaooo the signs have always been there and it’s truly amazing how I had been missing them for years
Amy Adams: Her as Amelia Earhart in Night at the Museum was also definitely a huge Thing to young me. Again, I had been completely oblivious about this crush for years
David Luiz: HAH! This is the point where we do NOT get into my football/soccer crushes bc this list would get WAYYY too long hahaha. I had to cut loads of people from my list for this post bc I develop a new celebrity crush every 5 minutes basically but yeah. David Luiz was definitely my biggest football/soccer crush out of..... everyone else
M*rvel
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I don’t have a lot to say about any of them since I’m not into m*rvel anymore TFATWS makes me want to stick the tip of my toe back into m*rvel waters but otherwise NO THANKS
Sebastian Stan was, if my judgement of my archive is right, the longest highkey celebrity crush I’ve ever had. Mostly because I love Bucky a lot and he was so amazing in Captain America: The Winter Soldier. I must’ve had a crush on him for as long as I had been in the m*rvel fandom
Recent Past
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some celeb crushes from last year that were all more or less short-lived tbh
Ester Expósito: As it often goes I didn’t find her spectacular in the beginning but as Élite went on I started to develop a huge crush on her. I still find her pretty hot but I’m not invested in Élite so yeah..... I have no object permanence
Mina El Hammani: Got to know her through Élite, too. She’s so incredibly beautiful. Had a hard time choosing a photo of her bc I’d stare at every single one for ages. Wow.
Danger Days!Gerard Way: Hah! The ones of you who’ve been following me for longer might remember my posts about wanting to dye my hair neon red. Well, him’s the reason and also clinical depression. Ended up with natural red/ginger bc my hair is too thin for bleaching lel. ANYWAY
Maxence Danet Fauvel: Pretty short-lived crush from my Skam days
Ramy Moharam Fouad: So Ramy has a brother, Tamino-Amir Moharam Fouad, who makes INCREDIBLE music. Ramy made some of his music videos (directed them? not sure), that’s how he came to my attention. Idk man he’s just so incredibly beautiful.... gives me a hint of genvy, too......
Janelle Monáe: Became a fan when Make Me Feel came out, listened to the entire album for days and eventually inevitably crushed on her
Lera Abova: Saw her in ANИА and fell in love. I screamed to my friends for weeks about how she was the most beautiful human being I’d ever seen etc etc. Eventually my crush went away mostly, but I still think she’s stunning
Keiynan Lonsdale: Keiynan said FUCK gender and I said 😍😍😍 and that’s all you need to know.
Current
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*deep breath* alright let’s gooo
Bright (Wachirawit Chivaaree): Crushed on him for as long as I watched 2gether/Still 2gether lmao. I still like him a lot and sometimes lose my mind over him but I’m not exceptionally Thirsty™
Tul (Pakorn Thanasrivanitchai) and Max (Nattapol Diloknawarit): If you search either of them on tumblr you will have to scroll for a long, long time to find seperate photos of them. However, I’m not patient enough so here we are. Re: Tul, actually I want to copy/paste what Ali said bc DAMN a man who is confident about his masculinity and sexuality really is kinda hot. Same goes for Max tbh. Also Max’ lips look so soft I [redacted]
Lukas von Horbatschewsky: Also known as Lukas Alexander. He did an amazing job in Druck and he’s just a person I admire in general. As one of the few out trans actors in Germany, he had a main role as a trans boy in Druck and also co-wrote Druck’s seasons 5 and 6. He’s just a huge role model to me and, apart from that, Big Crush Material (h i s  e y e s)
Li Wei: Someone suggested him as Hua Cheng for the TGCF live action and my life hasn’t been the same since. While I’m open for whoever will get that role in the end, I could look at his face for hours and not get bored. Major Genvy, too.
Li BoWen and Liu HaiKuan: I will have to deal with these two in one paragraph bc LanLan bc they have the exact same effect on me which is. that they’re not 100% my type but I WILL go absolutely feral about them at regular intervals, if you know what I mean
Song JiYang: ohh honey. oh honey.......... hhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh. I have a natural affinity for aquarius ppl and this one lives in my heart rent free. I’d even make him soup if he’d ask.
Wang YiBo: WELL HOLY SHIT. listen. LISTEN! the hype around him is 100% justified imo he really is That Bitch and I love him so so much for it. Fucking ICON
Honorary Mentions: Gender Envy
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Here’s to the People I Thought I Had A Crush On But Not Quite until I learned the word Gender Envy:
Zhu YiLong: Man, this is the person who’s mainly responsible for me finding out AT ALL about not being entirely cis. The POWER he holds!!! His performance as Ye Zun in Guardian was like a breakthrough point for me which. certain people witnessed in real time hahaha oh I love this fandom!!
Zhu ZanJin: HIM. AAAH!! He’s literally so beautiful and whenever I see him I just go ZANZAN!! in my head and in the tags bc. well. hIM.
Xiao Zhan With Long Hair: Look, Xiao Zhan is always amazing but BLESS the person who made these manips. I can finally rest.
Wang YiBo: uhh what’s he doing here again?? Tbh YiBo is one of the few, if not the only person that gives me Major Gender Envy that I would also [redacted] if they asked. Do I want to be him or be with him? The answer is Yes.
I skipped the fictional characters bc I tend not to crush on them 👉👈 Instead I will just directly crush on the actors/actresses lol!
Thank you for bearing with me. As a prize, you can choose between a ladder supported forehead kiss, or a bowl of homemade soup. ❤
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