#tell me how you feel youve been at it for a while now lock that screen dont touch that dial numb that feeling we’ve got another mile

[carcinized]

^ top 10 albums that make me feel emotions

[awkwardarmadildo]

to add on to the humans are space orcs/earth is the universe's australia, sensing. my therapist has recently explained that its not normal the way i know who and where someone is by their footsteps. not just the sound, but the vibrations. if someone isnt purposely walking on light feet, i can tell who and where they are, even with headphones blaring. imagine a human on a ship and the awe-filled terror itd earn from their non-human crewmates.

edit: ive realized i wasnt clear enough in my intentions. im not saying "if you can tell peoples footsteps apart, youve been ✨️ T R A U M A T I Z E D ✨️ d-(^♡^)-b ". its about the inherent panic in Not hearing the steppies and therefore Not having the time to prepare yourself for whoever might be approaching and essentially being ambushed. also, being able to tell if someone is normalTM, happy, sad, et cetera. the combined terror of not being given time to make oneself "presentable" for whoevers coming, And Also whoever has just seemingly teleported is fucking pissed, which is never good. Anyways, enjoy!!! ＼(^o^)／

Gilith enters the library, searching for Human Raven. They seem to be found most often either here or in one of the many gardens on the ship. Human Alex said he'd likely find them here today.

Gilith pokes his head through the doorway, not seeing Human Raven, but before he can move on, a voice calls out from one of the high-backed chairs decorating the library.

"Hello Lithy, what do you need?"

Gilith sputters, "Wha- Human Raven, how did you know it was me?" Gilith makes his way over to the chair that held Human Raven in a twisted knot that, when Human Raven stood up, would surely leave a horrifying crunch Human Alex had likened to a human candy that exploded in one's mouth.

"You've got some loud stompers, Lithy."

"I do not know what that means, Human Raven."

Raven stands, causing Gilith to flinch at many snaps and crackles of their bones settling into place, and smiles up at his towering form.

"What did you need?"

Gilith notices more and more Human Raven's greetings. He thought maybe they could hear him coming, but they greeted him while wearing ear speakers, the volume so loud, Gilith could hear it from a few feet away.

Humans did not have psychic skills, and the only other human who seemed capable of a preemptive greeting was Human Alex. The two seemed to share all of their off-hours, so maybe that was where he could find his answers.

Gilith scoured the many gardens, stopping just outside of the doorway. He could hear Human Alex and Human Raven chattering to each other, but neither seemed to notice his presence.

In an attempt not to disturb them, he walked with what Human Bea had described as "tip-toes". A challenging feat, considering his round flat feet, but he managed.

Both Human Raven and Human Alex had their backs to him, so he coughed in the same way Human Bea often did to get everyone's attention.

The reaction he got was unexpected when both Human Raven and Human Alex flinched so hard their shoulders seemed to lock.

"My apologies! I didn't mean to startle you," he rushed over, but stopped short when they both flinched again. He recoiled his hand.

"It's ok, Lithy," Raven says, voice slightly choked. "Just give us a sec."

"Oh. Okay." Gilith turned his eyes down.

"What-" Alex started, his voice sounding as though it was rubbed raw. He cleared his throat and tried again. "What can we do for you, Gilith?"

"I did not have anything specific to talk to you about. I wanted to..." he trails off. "I wanted to inform you of the new plants we are picking up at the next trade planet."

Gilith feels his face twist with the lie, but now didn't seem like a good time to ask.

His desire to understand, however, doesn't fade after the incident. It only makes his hunger grow.

Instead of bothering Human Alex or Human Raven, Gilith decides to ask Human Bea, who does not sense him before he greets her.

"Hello, Human Bea."

"Yes, hello, Gilith. Is everything okay?"

"I have question."

Bea tilts her head. "Ask away."

"Are you- humans- able to detect someone before you see them?"

Bea's face softens into an aching sort of frown. "Not naturally."

"What do you mean?"

She takes a breath, seemingly preparing herself. "Well, most people are able to live in a relatively safe place. But some people aren't as lucky. Some people have to memorize the falls of others' feet. It's a learned survival tactic."

"I don't understand," Gilith says, his face wrinkling in confusion.

"Some people aren't safe, so for the ones who weren't born with the good luck of a safe home, they have to know who and where someone is. They have to know if they need to hide or prepare themself. They have to know if they're in danger or not."

Gilith feels his whole body go slack as a wave of sadness washes over him at the memory of Human Raven and Human Alex's reaction to his sudden appearance.

"I have loud stompers."

Bea's face scrunches up as though she's trying not to laugh. "You do. You have safe stompers, too."

[moonstruckme]

Oooo darling!! Your latest TASM fic sparked and idea!

(Before that, hello lovely 🩷 i hope you're having the best spooky season!)

Big brother!Sirius coming to save some poor sod that upset his slytherin!sister (Regulus' twin). So you have the charming & fun Sirius; quiet & regal Regulus; loyal & volatile reader. And i imagine Sirius calls them his twin stars (because hes deffinately a huge sap).

Where wolfstar is in 7th year and has a great relationship with the twins (maybe theyre trying to become their legal guardians behind the scenes). He and Remus are in their dorm before Peter bursts in, breathless, only saying "y/n" before Sirius is off. He has no doubt to why you were put in 🐍, and god forbid someone actually hurt his baby sister.

On reader's side, someone made a snide comment about Remmy being a halfblood or ruining the Black legacy or something and reader gets pissed because shes actually quite fond of him.

Then whatever you decide love; maybe reader gets hurt; maybe she does the hurting; maybe Remus saves the day with his long legs; or Sirius might show people what growing up in the 'Noble house of Black' does to someone. And idk what Reggie is doing, i imagine he was making out with James and they come in at the last minute ("😱 james!! What have you done!? Youve DEFILED one of my precious stars!!! Let go of him!!!! NO, dont touch him, get away.")

Anyway bub, as always; dont feel pressured and take all the creative liberties youd like!! Love you lots darling x

Hi my lovely, thanks for requesting! I really need to get more creative than bloody noses but ugh they're just so classic

cw: blood

big brother!sirius + (as opposed to x, I guess?) little sister!reader ♡ 861 words

“You weren’t there!” you insist as Sirius stalks back and forth across the room, tapping his wand against his leg in a quick, restless beat. “He said—he—” You look at Remus, the boy’s eyebrows drawn together in concentration and concern as he presses a cloth under your nose, trying to stop the blood that’s already crusted down your chin. You decide to keep your mouth shut. 

Remus smiles wryly, and you know he suspects why you’ve chosen to go quiet. “It doesn’t matter what they said, love. I don’t need you getting in fights for me.”

“Who was it?” Sirius demands, for probably the fourth or fifth time. You’re losing count. 

“It’s already been hand—ah!” Remus murmurs an episky while you’re distracted, and you flinch, hands flying to your face as your septum snaps back into its proper place. “Fuck, could’a given me some warning.” 

“Sorry,” Remus says, and he looks like he means it, tilting your chin up to continue cleaning your face as you look at him with teary eyes. “Thought it might hurt less if you weren’t expecting it.” 

“How do you figure?” you ask him, somewhat miffed. 

“Back. On. Task.” Sirius claps his hands with each word, coming to a stop in front of you. “Who did this? Remus is my boyfriend, I have twice as much a right to defend his honor as you do, you—you fucking—squirt.” 

You sneer at the childish name, but you know your brother means to rile you. “I told you, I handled it. He won’t do it again.” 

“And he’s never going to touch you again either,” Sirius promises menacingly, squatting in front of you to look you in the eyes, “if you just tell me the fucker’s name.” 

“Alright, that’s enough,” Remus says, taking his boyfriend’s shoulder in a spindly hand, the touch both soothing and controlling as he pushes Sirius back from you. “Let’s just let her rest for a minute, yeah?” Sirius sputters in protest, but Remus moves in front of him, pressing his face into his boyfriends’ dark locks. You roll your eyes at the display, though a tiny part of you loves that your brother has someone who loves him this well. Once he quiets, Remus speaks in a low, soothing voice. “I know, I know, you won’t be deterred from your vengeance, but there’s time for that later. Let’s just calm down for now.” 

It’s a lovely prospect, but at that moment, the door opens to reveal Regulus and James, both looking somewhat ruffled. James stops short at seeing you all gathered in his dorm (Remus and Sirius, of course, have every right to be here, but you’d bet he and Reg were hoping for some privacy) and stands there blinking for a moment. Your twin’s blasé facade slips the moment he sees you with blood still crusted to your nostrils and tear tracks down your face. 

“What happened?” he asks, pushing past James and into the dorm. 

“She got into a fight,” Sirius says, outrage instantly rekindled, and Remus sighs in exasperated resignation, his work undone. “Someone said something about Moony, but she won’t tell who.” 

Now James looks upset too, eyes darting to Remus concernedly. “About Moony? When?” 

“Just now!” Sirius throws up his hands. “Ten minutes ago! Did either of you see anything?” 

James shakes his head, and despite Regulus’ blank expression, you catch the embarrassed shifting of his stance. “No,” James says, “we were, uh…we didn’t see anything.” 

“I bet I know who it was though,” Regulus offers, that traitorous scum. He’s just throwing you under the bus to take the heat off himself. 

It works; Sirius perks up. “Yeah? Who?”

“It doesn’t matter who,” you say, but Sirius cuts you off, facing your twin. 

“Who?” he asks. 

“It was the guy you were arguing with yesterday too, right?” Reg glances at you for confirmation, and you glare at him. Don’t you dare, your look says, but he nods and turns back to Sirius. “He’s your year, the one you guys call Sni—”

“Reg and James were coming in here to have sex!” you blurt. 

It’s a wonder Sirius doesn’t get whiplash from how fast he turns around. “What?” 

You nod, unable to feel guilty as Regulus gives you an appalled look from behind your older brother. “Mhm,” you say. “Their hair is all messed up, and look—their lips are swollen. Plus, they were surprised we were in here.” 

You do feel a tiny bit bad for James, whose dark skin blanches when Sirius turns on him. “James Potter, did you come in here to defile my brother?” 

James looks to Remus for help, but his friend only turns his palms up like Sorry, what can you do?. After a second, Regulus steps closer to him.

“Sirius, we—”

“Don’t touch him,” Sirius practically retches. He shakes his head, grabbing Regulus by the arm and all but dragging him from the room. “Alright, listen. You are going to tell me who was talking shit about Remus, and then we’re going to have an entirely separate conversation about boundaries.” He casts a noxious look back at James. “And I’ll deal with you later!” 

[j1mmys-darl1ng]

.ೃ࿐scarring and scaring.ೃ࿐

Pairing : tate langdon x reader

Warnings : mentions of sh, blood, use of y/n, probably mischarecterisation

A/n : im so sorry for not making a new fic, life has been really kicking my ass right now and literally the worst thing i thought could happen happened. Ill try and write a few more fics before October (im not participating in kinktober).

You were dragging the small, pointy metalic object along your arm, adding more pressure each time before you let out a small yelp. Shit. Tate is definitely gonna give you a scolding when he finds you like this.

You wash off the blood, watching the water turn red and then transparent again. You had ran out of bandages the last time this happened so you just pull the sleves of your hoodie down.

"hey, y/n, everything ok in there?" you hear Tates voice through the door. You knew he wasnt an idiot and would definitely know somethings up. He always does.

"uh... Yea.. Im fine" your voice wavers slightly towards the end, seeing the blood bleed through your sleeve. Holy shit. Mabye you went deeper than you thought.

"ok well im not leaving till you open this door, im not an idiot. I know whats going on in there"

You feel a pang of guilt in your gut, knowing you promised him that you would stop. But this time was the first in a while. You can just predict the 'you were doing so well' thats going to come out of his mouth.

You know he wont leave until he sees how much damage youve done. Its not really like he has anything better to do due to being bound to the house and all that crap.

"the door isnt locked.." you tell him, feeling too ashamed to open the door yourself.

He opens the door.

You see his eyes go down to your sleves.

"pull em' up" he tells you. Its not a question, its a command.

As you hesitantly pull your sleves up, the blood smears up with it, creating a bloody mess up your arm. Your eyes begin to spike with tears, your lip begining to tremble and your breathing getting shakier.

"c'mere, let me clean this since i know you wont" his voice is softer now, his disappointment clear but he knows better than to yell at you when your in a glass state. Both fragile and he can see through your words.

He begins to rinse the cuts, using a cloth to wipe the blood away. His cheek rests against your shoulder as he does this.

"you promised me. You swore that you wouldnt do it again, y/n."

".. i know.."

"do you?"

After rinsing out the wounds to the best he could, he pats your arms down with a towel, also adding a bit of pressure to stop the bleeding. Despite the cuts not being fatal, the more pressure you were adding with the tool was making it worse.

After a few minutes, he removes the towel, bandaging your arms with a secret stash he had hidden from you. It was tight but not too tight it would cut off your circulation.

He presses a few small kisses onto the bandages, his thumb rubbing over them gently. It was a sweet moment. One that never usually occurs.

It felt nice.

A/n : shout out to the swaggy discord server im in and shout out to lily for watching sleepover last night with me over a discord call

Thanks for reading! <3

[4pfsukuna]

I uh have an announcement.

How would yall feel about about a satosugu threesome with reader? Like itll be the filthiest smut youve probably ever read… honestly ive already written 3k words and im only 1/4 of the way done heres a tiny piece.

“Shes also been extra angry lately all she wanted was some fun time with us—“ Gojo begins to guilt trip him but Suguru being the sly talker he is cuts him off moving to the table in front of you watching as another finger gets added inside of you.

“Oh ‘m sorry sweetheart, can you forgive me” he coos pulling his hair into a bun and you knew what that meant.

“No!” And while Gojo smacks your clit telling you to play nice Suguru dangerously licks his lips enjoying the sight of his two brats teasing him and toying with another. His dick twitches at the sight and it doesnt go unnoticed Gojo slaps your clit with more force making you squirm until your hips spasm and youre moaning his name indicating youre the first of the 3 to cum.

“Suguru why dont you show her how sorry you are and lick her clean” and neither of you are sure when Gojo took control but the sexual charge in the room was thick and if you two were working together then Suguru was happily at your mercy.

He rushes forward tongue darting out to lap up your juices while Gojo plays with your nipples through your tshirt. He moans as his lips wrap around your sensitive bud and you nearly lurch forward but Gojo keep you tightly against him pulling your chin to lock lips with his puffy ones. Getos tongue flicks against your clit as he pushes in two thick fingers your legs almost locked around his head which never bothered him but gojo forces your legs open with his right hand and adds two of his own long skinny fingers in your tight whole with Suguru. 

Your hips begin to buck madly against both of your lovers fingers a crazed smile on your face as you chase your orgasm both men in a trance at your sexual bliss. Sugurus left hand grips Gojos length matching the pace making sure you both knew how sorry he was  as he sucks harder on your nub.

“Youre doing so good princess, taking both of our fingers so well.” Gojo praises watching how you falter. Oh you were such a whore for being praised and an even bigger one when they both worshiped your body. 

“Oh you like having both of our fingers in your tight little cunt, huh? I can feel you clenching…shit… you look so pretty like this fuck i want to be in your pussy so deep and feel you squeeze around my cock like that fuck” he groans and satoru was always vocal but right now his words were going straight to your core at the complete filth he was spouting. You needed him badly. 

“Fuck Suguru” he groans in your neck at the way suguru squeezes his length precum spilling onto his hand.

[heesdreamer]

YOUVE MADE ME

PAIRING ➩ heeseung x reader

SUMMARY ➩ sequel to YOU MAKE ME (could maybe be read as a stand alone but i don’t recommend it)

WARNINGS ➩ this is straight up full on porn.. i don’t often write full smut but! heeseung is very obsessed w reader in an unhealthy way and he has a pain kink, rough sex but it’s consensual and wanted from both parties

WC ➩ 6k

AUTHORS NOTE ➩ okay the point i made abt being anti part 2 comment still stands lol it just so happened im obsessed with this universe and these characters and i personally wanted smut for them so you guys get it as well lol! not proof read and i don’t rlly write smut much so idk if it’s any good lol but it’s 8am so i dont rlly care

“Are you sure she’s not going to care?” You were standing on a cracked cement porch, anxiously tugging on your bunny ears and hiding behind Heeseung’s tall frame as he messed with the lock on the door.

“Of course she won’t, she loves you.” He was shaking his head and trying to reassure you, swearing under his breath as he shook the handle with frustration.

He was referring to his grandmother that he lived with, a small frail woman who offered you kind smiles and slightly stale baked goods anytime her grandson brought you over for dinner or a sleepover.

She made the two of you sleep in the living room most the time, originally saying you had to sleep out there alone but eventually caving in when Heeseung really stressed the importance of sleeping beside you. You’d smiled softly when she had nudged you and called him clingy, knowing she didn’t even understand half of it.

You didn’t mind how clingy he was with you, always following close behind you throughout the school halls and draping himself onto your side in the library.

Heeseung had never been shy in his obsession with you, sometimes muttering things to you late in the night that caused a shiver to roll up your spine.

“Besides,” He was letting out a grunt as he finally managed to unstick the lock and shove forward into the old door with his shoulder. It flew open and he stumbled forward a bit before turning around to face you with a smile. “She won’t even know you were here.”

You frowned softly as you looked at his handsome face, adorned with two new piercings that weren’t there when you’d met him and a decorative black eye. He’d kissed you deeply when you first saw him with it, whispering into your mouth and requesting you didn’t ask him what happened.

You didn’t, because you rarely ever did, and simply kissed him back. The two of you carried a ‘don’t ask, don’t tell’ state of mind most of the time and it made things simple despite sometimes unnerving you with how little you still knew about him.

“Breaking in while she’s on vacation, you really are a delinquent.” You were retorting back to him and you took a few steps into the familiar house, not having been inside for a few weeks considering it was summer now and you and Heeseung spent most of your time together around different places, sleeping in his car or getting a cheap motel for the night.

You’d graduated not too long ago and Heeseung had attended the ceremony with a bright grin and a bouquet of flowers, not having gotten enough credits to actually walk himself.

It was easy for you to allow him to become your entire world, that feeling of familiarity and comfort never leaving despite how rocky your situations seemed sometimes. Throughout being low on money and having rough home lives, you never doubted what he felt about you and vice versa.

“You like me like this.” He was smirking down at you and leaning forward so he could close the front door, his arm going over your shoulder and trapping you against the wood for a few seconds. “Makes me interesting.”

“You’re interesting anyways.” You were frowning up at him, your hands coming up to hold his neck a few inches below his jaw and pull him down a bit so you could kiss him softly.

He was humming against your lips and immediately pushing himself forward so he could be pressed ontop of you, his hip coming up to your stomach due to the height difference. You could feel the bone and the thick metal of his belt pressing into your stomach uncomfortably and you shifted underneath him at the feeling.

“Does it hurt?” He was pulling back to whisper into your mouth when he noticed your movements and you nodded softly, wincing a bit at the feeling.

Heeseung was pausing for a few seconds before he was pressing himself harder against you, the studded spikes going deeper into your skin and you let out a small hiss into his open lips. He was kissing you again before pulling his hips back to avoid actually hurting you.

You’d realized pretty quickly that Heeseung had a particular taste when it came to pain, first noticing it in small things like the way he would bite down on your lip during heavy make out sessions. Then it transitioned to his breath hitching every time you’d pinch his arm for annoying you while you did homework, his habit of pushing you against the nearest surface and pinning you there.

The two of you had been taking it relatively slow, never surpassing long kissing sessions accompanied by rare heavy petting but he drove you crazy almost every time you were around him.

He’d get this certain look in his eye sometimes and your stomach would light up with want, taking in his large frame and the way he obsessed over you like you were the only thing he truly cared about. Sometimes you thought that you might be, as toxic as it sounds, Heeseung never applied any effort to anything or anybody outside of you.

“Tell me if it hurts.” He was whispering again and then kissing you before you could say anything, his hands going down to your hips to pull you tight against him at the same time he pressed his waist back into yours. You felt the sharp ends of the studs again and you gasped softly into his mouth.

“It hurts.” You whined and he let out a small hum, titling his head so the kiss kept getting deeper and messier every second. You could feel his tongue licking into your mouth and you stood on your tip toes so he could have better access.

“I bet it does.” He was retorting after a few seconds, his voice low and raspy now that he was out of breath and you felt your knees weaken when he was rolling his hips down into yours. The pleasure of feeling him against you was immediately followed by the pain of his belt. “You like it though, don’t you?”

He was asking but it wasn’t an actual question, already knowing the answer judging by the way you let out a small cry and wrapped your arms around his neck to keep yourself standing.

His big hands were leaving your hips, sliding down to hook under you thighs and you felt him lift one of your legs so it was wrapped around his waist. You whined again and he smiled darkly at the sound, glancing up at you before going back down to where your hips where fully meeting now.

After a few seconds of seeing if you were comfortable, he was rolling his lower half into yours again with more contact now that your legs were more spread. He was hard and pressing harshly against you, his cock tight in his ripped jeans and you let out a cry while gripping his neck tighter.

“Tell me you like it when it hurts.” He was demanding in a low voice, leaning forward to kiss your jaw softly and pet your hair back out of your face more. He gave you a look like he was waiting for permission for something and you nodded your head, melting at the smile he gave you when he slowly took off your favorite hat.

You didn’t say anything for a few beats, just letting out soft cries at the feeling of him practically dry humping into you against the door. You only managed to speak again when he was thrusting particularly hard and the spikes caught roughly on your skin.

“I like it.” You gasped out and ducked your face down into his neck, wrapping your leg tighter around his middle so he could have even more access to your aching core. “Fuck Hee, I like it.”

“I know baby.” He was quickly responding and you felt flushed at how calm he was managing to sound, meanwhile you don’t think you’d be able to stand on your own if he were to let you go. You tugged on his hair softly so he would move his head back to look at you and he paused for a second before doing so, watching you intensely.

You were leaning in to kiss him again, sloppy in your movements and you could feel spit running down your chin from the way you were trying to suck his tongue deep into your throat. He was groaning now finally and you felt a wave of pride at the fact you were affecting him too.

More than you realized, considering the squeal of surprise that was slipping from your mouth when he was reaching down to aggressively hoist your other leg up so you were completely being held up against him. You could feel how hard he was in his jeans, pressed into your middle as he stepped away from the door and swiftly carried you towards his bedroom.

You let out a small giggle when he was casually tossing you onto the mattress, bouncing slightly from the impact. It was immediately disappearing when you saw the look on his face, familiar and dark in a way that made your mouth part.

He was on top of you before you could say anything, kissing you deeply again and you tried to ignore the fact his knee was landing perfectly in between your legs. You were sure that if he moved up a few inches he would be able to feel you throbbing against him, feeling dizzy from how much you wanted him.

“My pretty bunny.” He was practically cooing at you now, resting on his elbows as he kissed down your jaw and neck. The difference between his sweet words and how roughly he handled you was making you head spin, your back arching off the bed so your chest could press against his. “Are you feeling needy baby?”

“Please.” You were whining out and reaching your shaky hands up to his hair, tugging at it and rolling your hips up to connect with his leg slightly. His eyes darkened and you felt one of his hands go back down to your legs, cupping under your knee and pulling you forward so your core was sat against his thigh. “Heeseung please.”

“Stop begging and fuck my leg.” He was cutting you off in your pathetic attempts to get him to touch you, slapping your hand away from where it was continuously pulling at the collar of his hoodie. You could feel your eyes watering from need but you tried to ignore it, rolling your hips like he told you too and letting out a long moan at the feeling of him.

He was watching you with amusement but his eyes kept darkening as you fucked yourself against his clothed thigh, arching your back and panting slightly. He was pressing it uncomfortably hard against you and you could feel him everywhere, so large in the way he was laying on top of you and moving your body around like a puppet.

“Look at my nasty girl.” His voice was low like he didn’t care if you heard him, mainly speaking to himself in an amazed tone at the way you were humping into him dumbly. “Using me to get off like this, my sweet bunny.”

“Hee.” You were crying out to try and get his attention back on you, the stimulation of his leg and voice driving you crazy with the lack of actual touching that was happening. He gave you a soft look like he was pitying you and your desperation, nodding softly and pushing your hair out of your face again before sitting up off your chest.

You watched him as he pulled his hoodie over his head, wearing nothing underneath and you let out another whine as you kept rubbing yourself against him. You’d seen Heeseung shirtless plenty of times, between cuddling with him in the mornings and wrapping his bruised rib cages when he’d come to find you late at night.

It still always made you feel insane, made you feel like the luckiest person on the planet to get to see him like this. He always would say he didn’t deserve you, preaching about how beautiful and otherworldly you are to him but you felt the exact same each and every time you got to see him, especially like this.

He was leaning back down to kiss you again after throwing his hoodie across the room and your arms immediately came up to wrap around him, rubbing your hands up his sides and tightening your hold on his skin until you knew it would leave a mark. You were moaning softly into the kiss and he seemed unsatisfied with the fact you were calming down, dropping off his knees so his hard on was pressed against you instead.

You didn’t process his movement until he was rolling his hips into yours again, pulling out of the kiss to gasp and look down to see where your bodies connected. He was rocking into you slowly and you kept your arms tight around him, digging your nails deep into his skin and drinking in the way he let out choked breaths into your neck.

He sat up again, just slightly this time and you watched him as he aggressively tugged your shirt over your head, nearly tearing it in the process. You felt shy immediately at the sudden air hitting your bare skin but he was stopping in his movements to stare down at you, pushing your hair behind your ear slowly and watching as you took deep breaths that made your chest rise and fall.

“Fuck.” He was eventually breathing out and he sounded completely transfixed, eyes shooting up to yours for a second before immediately going back down. “You’re so perfect.”

“Stop.” You were mumbling under your breath, reaching up to try and pull him back down on to you so you could have a bit more cover. He was shaking his head and furrowing his eyebrows at your insecure tone, although fulfilling your request and laying back on top of you. You gasped slightly at the feeling of his warm skin pressed against yours and he half smiled down at you.

“I mean it. I’d do anything for you.” His tone was serious as he said it and you stared into his eyes. The first few times he’d spoken like this you didn’t take him completely serious, thinking he was just flattering you or saying exaggerated things to try and express how much he cared for you.

You quickly realized that he meant exactly what he said every single time, especially in scenarios where he felt like you needed protection or that somebody had disrespected you in some way. You’d had to pull him out of restaurants for trying to go after men who stared at your ass for too long, whispering calming words in his ear every time he caught sight of your dad from the front window when he dropped you off.

“Anything?” You were whispering up to him, your eyes wide and faking innocence. As quickly as you realized he was serious, you also learned that you liked how he treated you. You liked to see how far he would go if it meant keeping you safe and happy.

“Anything.” He was repeating it firmly and you felt him rock his hips into yours again, your legs instinctively spreading to let him fuck himself into your clothed core as he kept speaking in that low tone. “Nobody could take you away from me, you’re mine now.”

“W-what if they tried?” You were trying to keep yourself collected enough to speak but your head was spinning from the constant feeling of his hard cock pressing into you so harshly. You’d never went this far with him but you thought about it every single time you were with him, just as obsessed with him when it came to touching and being together like this.

“I’d kill them.” He was shaking his head and his eyebrows were furrowing like the ideas was genuinely upsetting him, his hand sliding down to hoist your thigh back up so every thrust was directly hitting your throbbing clit. You let out a loud moan at the feeling and his eyes were shooting back up to yours, more wild now that you were egging him on. “It’s me and you forever, I’ll do everything to keep you with me I don’t care. Nobody can make you feel like I can.”

You couldn’t find the energy to agree with him but you were letting out small gasps of his name and clawing into his back every time he moved forward, one of your hands shakily coming down to tug at his large belt roughly until it caught his attention. His eyes shot down to where you were pulling and that half smirk was back on his face when he looked up again.

“Is that what you want?” His voice was teasing and you felt a dry sob wrack through you at how slow he was taking it, aching to feel him closer. “My baby wants me inside her?”

“Heeseung, please.” You were nearly fully crying now and you continued to tug at his belt in an attempt to undo it, successfully getting it out of the first latch and then whining in frustration when it got stuck on the second peg. He was laughing softly but his hands were smacking yours away as he quickly tugged it off and unbuttoned the top of his jeans. “I need it please, I’ll do anything.”

“Anything?” He retorted back and his voice was mocking this time, clearly referring to the way you had antagonized him a few minutes earlier. Nonetheless he was sitting up off you slightly to tug down your own pants, getting them down under your thighs and watching as you shifted around to finish the rest.

Now that you were both fully undressed you felt a wave of nervousness again, avoiding looking at him but feeling the way his eyes were hungrily scanning up and down your body. The vulnerability of being laid out in front of him strangely made a chill run down your spine and you could feel yourself clenching around nothing, knowing he was only a few inches away from being able to push himself inside you.

He still wasn’t doing anything after a few second and you finally glanced over to him with a pout, impatience coursing through you and your hand came up to rest on his arm and try to tug him back down on top of you.

It didn’t surprise you that he was watching you with an amused look on his face, liking the way you struggled and squirmed around his bed as you body tried to find relief somewhere. His big hands where sliding up your legs to rest against your stomach, pressing down against your rib cage and you sucked in a tight breath at the feeling of him touching you.

“Would you let anybody else touch you like this?” He was asking in that same low tone and you let out another impatient cry, knowing he already knew the answer and just wanted to hear you say it. “Answer me or I’ll get myself off and make you watch.”

His words were making your eyes widen with shock and you met his gaze, seeing how dark and serious they were as he monitored you like he was hunting you. You frowned again and he bit his lip slightly, tugging the metal jewelry that was hugging the skin into his mouth for a few seconds.

“Only you.” You were gasping out and nodding so he understood how much you meant it, his hands instinctively flexing against your middle at your words. “I only want you Hee, I’m yours.”

“Yeah you’re mine.” He was repeating himself again and laying back on top of you so he could pull you in for another rough kiss, his hand cupping your chin to stop you from moving. You let out a moan when you felt him spitting against your tongue, immediately swiping over it with his own and he let out his own groan when you were twisting your head to try and suck it deeper into your throat.

When he shifted again, your entire body arched at the feeling of him pressed directly against your sensitive clit. He chuckled into the kiss before purposely directing his hips into the same position so you could feel it again, gasping into his mouth and slapping his side in warning.

“Be nice.” He was mumbling into your mouth and you frowned when he was kissing you again, ignoring your smack against his skin and rubbing against you more and more until your head was completely spinning. “That’s my good girl.”

“I need you.” You were crying out and he groaned softly at the desperation in your voice, rumbling against your chest as he laid his head into your neck again for a few seconds. You could feel him biting down on your collarbone and a shiver ran through you as you ran your hand through his hair to get his attention back on you.

“You need me?” He was whispering when he picked his head back up, watching you intensely with a slightly wild look in his eye and you knew your words were fueling that obsession he carried in his heart, on the borderline of unhealthy with how eager he was to hear you repeat the words to him. “Tell me you need me again Y/N, tell me you can’t live without me.”

“I can’t.” You were repeating the words multiple times in a dizzy mantra, not thinking clearly considering he was still rutting against you as he spoke calmly and slow. If you didn’t know any better, didn’t see his fucked out expression as he stared down at you, you would’ve thought he was completely unaffected by how steady his tone was compared to yours. “Please Heeseung, I can’t. I’m going to go crazy, I need you so bad.”

He was nodding his head finally, seemingly satisfied with your words and he watched you for a few more seconds before his hand was running back down towards your ribs, passing them and softly caressing over your stomach instead.

A shiver ran through you and you watched his lip curl up at your body’s reaction, stretching underneath his piercing and you looked away quickly, more and more overwhelmed the longer you watched him. His hand was stopping just below your hip and you felt him squeeze the bone tightly, studying your expression for a few breaths before he was dipping down to swiftly kiss you.

“I can prep you.” He was saying into your mouth but the way he trailed off led you to believe he had another idea and you nodded your head eagerly for him to continue, hanging onto his every word. “Or I can just fuck you.”

You breath caught at the direct words, something that would normally make you feel shy if you weren’t completely lust drunk and desperate for him to do whatever he wanted to you. You almost told him that, told him you didn’t care what he did and you allow him complete control over your body, but instead you paused and tried to collect yourself for a few seconds.

“It’ll hurt.” He was saying, noticing you hadn’t gathered your thoughts and he was kissing you deeply again for a few seconds after the statement.

You both knew that wasn’t a dealbreaker at all, if anything the thought excited you more and caused your heart rate to increase. He seemed to know this considering the way his lip curled back into a smirk, your expression at the statement giving you away completely. You were wrapping your hand around his bicep that was still supporting his weight above you, nodding your head swiftly.

“My perfect girl.” He was cooing at you but his tone was almost mean, mocking you as he kissed his teeth suddenly. You glanced down to find the reason for his noise, flushing at the fact he was using his hand to adjust himself so he was lined up with your entrance. “Look at you, clenching around nothing just from looking at my cock.”

You flushed bright red and your eyes were snapping back up to meet his, drinking in how dark they were as he glared down at you. They were softening suddenly and he was kissing you again slowly, his mood changes causing your head to spin as you happily accepted the contact.

You could feel him pressing against you as you kissed, heart racing so hard it almost hurt at the fact you were finally going to have him completely, in all the ways you’d been imagining since you’d met him. Despite how twisted you knew he could be, he was sweet in the way he was caressing your face as he started to push into you.

Your mouth was parting in a gasp, face pulling back in a wince of pain at the sudden intrusion and you could feel your breath catching in your throat at the feeling of him nearly tearing you open.

“Breathe baby, fuck.” He was cursing under his breath and for the first time today, he sounded just as fucked as you were. His words were tight and forced and you figured it was because how tightly you were squeezing against him to try and stop the pain. “Bunny, you’ve gotta loosen up.”

You were instinctively shaking your head at the suggestion, your body screaming in rejection from how thick he felt pushing into you. You figured he was barely even halfway in considering how big he looked when you glanced down and you suddenly felt worried you weren’t going to be able to take him.

He stayed still for a few moments, letting you take deep breaths as he guided them alongside his own and you could vaguely feel his big hands pushing your hair out of your sweaty face and rubbing up and down your sides until the wave of pain subsided.

Then it was quickly replaced with a burst of pleasure, a small whine slipping from your mouth and you heard him almost chuckle in relief at the realization you’d managed through it. The pain was still there but it felt euphoric now that it wasn’t unbearable, the perfect amount of uncomfortable that you learned you liked so much because of him.

Heeseung was kissing you again briefly before pushing further in without any warning, a loud cry ripping through you as your hands came around to grip tightly into his back. He was sweaty under your hands and your stomach pressed against his when your back instinctively arched off the bed to try and run away from the foreign feeling.

“Let me fuck you, let me take care of you.” You could hear him grunting the words in your ear and you were nodding swiftly, immediately breaking into a fit of moans when he bottomed out inside of you and rolled his hips slightly to get you used to the feeling of his entire length.

“Heeseung.” You were slurring out and he laughed softly into your skin, his hand scrunching tightly in your hair before sliding down to your hip to hold you in place as he started to pull out of you.

You didn’t have time to catch your breath before he was slamming back into you with his entire length, a sob of pleasure wracking through you at the feeling of him fucking into you so aggressively matched with his big head keeping you pinned against the mattress. He was sucking in tight breaths near your ear but your head was too dizzy to hear him completely, lost in the feeling of him repeatedly ramming himself inside of you.

“All mine.” His words were slowly filtering in and you gasped again at how fucked out he sounded, almost angry as he spat the words directly near your ear. “You’re all fucking mine, my perfect girl. Just made for me, only I get you like this.”

You were trying to nod at his words or show him form of agreement but you couldn’t bring yourself back to reality long enough, you didn’t think he was paying attention anyways considering the way he was relentlessly pushing himself into you at a pace that was nearly too painful.

Heeseung was slipping forward slightly off his elbow, losing his balance from how hard he was fucking into you and you could feel his chest slam against yours in a way that shoved the breath out of your lungs. You knew you probably looked completely wrecked, tears streaming down your face as you let out continuous cries of his name and slurred words that didn’t make any sense.

You could feel that slightly familiar intense feeling building in your stomach, scratching down his back to try and communicate that you were getting close and he luckily seemed to understand because you could feel him nodding his head against your shoulder, his hips sloppy in their assault now as he got closer too.

When you were coming undone, your vision went black for a second and you could feel his hand slipping off your hip and reaching up to cup under your chin roughly, pulling you in for a bruising kiss as he finished alongside you.

The kiss was messy and painful, teeth clashing together as he licked into your mouth and you could feel him slowly pushing into you a few more times, tingling in overstimulation at the feeling of him pressing against your sensitive clit before he was stopping and leaning against your chest more.

His room was silent outside of the sound of your heavy breathing, trying to gain the air back that had disappeared and not returned since he threw you onto his bed. That vulnerable feeling was creeping back up and you suddenly felt very exposed even though he was completely covering your body, even more so when he was slowly slipping himself out from inside of you and clearing his throat gently.

At first you thought he was feeling awkward too, sitting up slowly and shifting off the bed until he could cross the room into the connected bathroom. You laid there in silence, slightly hurt that he had walked away without saying anything before he was swiftly returning with something in his hand, bending down to grab his hoodie and a pair of sweatpants before he came back to the bed.

You watched him in silence, biting your lip anxiously, as he pulled the sweatpants over his legs and glanced down at you. His eyes had completely softened now, that dark edge missing as he gently helped you sit up against the pillows.

“My perfect girl.” He was pushing your hair back again and pressing a wet towel, what you now realized was what he had went to grab, against your forehead softly. He was wiping the sweat from your face and trailing it down your neck.

You still didn’t say anything when he helped you sit up more so he could slip his hoodie over your frame, flushing at the fact he was letting you wear his favorite one despite the fact you were still sweaty and gross.

He was climbing back up on the small bed, the two of you barely able to fit side by side on it but you leaned into his body when you felt his hip against yours and he tugged you closer so you were halfway in his lap and laying your head down on his shoulder.

“You okay? Did I hurt you?” His voice was gentle and you smiled softly although he couldn’t see it, liking the fact he could quickly go back to being so sweet despite how rough he just was with you.

“Not in any way I didn’t like.” You were telling him and you picked your head up so you could look at his face.

His hair was a lot longer now, completely covering his eyes when it was dry and fluffy and he didn’t style it. You’d memorized every mark or scar on his features, stared into his eyes for hours on end and watched how they changed and shifted with each emotion he felt or every story he told you.

He had a specific look that he only ever carried when he was looking in your direction or talking about you, something past love and adoration. Something so intense that you would be scared of it if you didn’t feel it too, that deep pull to him that didn’t go away no matter how many days you’d spent together trying to figure it out.

“Stay here tonight.” He was whispering to you and you heard a hint of that insecurity that he sometimes carried back when you’d first met him, not yet showing you all of him and his personality and unsure if you’d accept him for his faults.

“I’m not going anywhere.” You were shaking your head and reminding him, a deeper meaning behind your words other than just spending the night with him here in this house. You knew he worried about you leaving him eventually, telling you a few times late at night how insane it would make him if you ever did.

It was easier to reassure him that you wouldn’t go anywhere, tell him you didn’t have anywhere else you’d want to be and you loved to be with him. It was easier to say this and try to calm his wandering mind over having to admit that you felt the exact same way, your skin itching at the idea of going without him for an extended period of time. You knew it would be dangerous to admit that you were just as crazy as he was.

So instead you kissed him softly and pushed his bangs out of his sweaty face, letting him hold you tightly in his arms and check over your body for any bruises or marks he might’ve caused.

He didn’t need to know how much you craved his insanity.

So instead you kissed him softly and pushed his bangs out of his sweaty face, letting him hold you tightly in his arms and check over your body for any bruises or marks he might’ve caused.

He didn’t need to know how much you craved his insanity.

[deletedsissy5x]

Awe good your awake, im sure you must have so many questions. Your old life is gone forever, you have been kidnapped and your now my real life sissy baby slave. Daddy slipped you something last night at the bar. He dropped it in your beer while you were flirting with me. Why do I keep calling him Daddy I'm sure your wondering. Well my husband and I have a major major kink for forced sissy baby girls. We have had a few play with us but they always back out once we tell them we are adopting them full time. So Daddy and I decided we would just kidnap some looser and him our sissy baby girl and guess who we picked?

Now im sure youve noticed your hands feel and chest are restrained and those restraints are for your own good. Daddy doesn't want you walking anymore so he decided your new age will be 1 FORVER. today is your new birthday and we are going to celebrate with a small sissy baby welcome party o lyrics a couple guests family mostly. Now as for your yucky male parts Daddy was nice enough to let you keep them. I did have some major influence one that by the way sissy. He wanted your cock cut off and your balls left but tucked inside you. I told him it would be soooo much more fun and mean to lock it away in a nice pink cage we will shirk as we go. No more hard ons or stiffys or erections at all. Your sissy cock is now a clit. It's never going to feel air again. The cage and the diapers are permanent. Daddy only agreed to the cage because he gets to hold the keys but he said he's going to be gluing it shut and the keyhole will be filled with glue.

Now let's take a look around your new room, you'll be allowed in 3 rooms in the house. Sissys bedroom, sissys play/feeding room, sissys punishment room. As a rule Daddy doesn't come in sissys bedroom he only plays with you in the punishment room. You will have a sissy babysitter too but you won't meet her until next week. She's very excited to help teach you how to be a good sissy girl. Ok sissy now it looks and smells like that diaper is nice and full. Mommy is going to go ahead and put another diaper over that one so the smells not so bad. Diaper changes are earned and you have definitely not earned a diaper change token yet so you'll just have to learn to enjoy that dirty diaper a while longer. Now let's get you sat up so we can send Daddy a cute sissy picture while he's at work. Mommy just loves getting him all horny at work. Now look your cutest and say DADDY!

[the-californicationist]

Hey, I'm not sure if youve done something like this yet, but could you please do a fic where Reader just wants to feel closer to Simon and honestly is just being really clingy and kind of gently begs him if they can just sit on his cock and then they doze off like that bc theyre finally as close to his as they want to be? Lots and lots of love and thanks!

"The Space Between" (AO3 Link)

You watched him carefully from your spot across the wide den. He was playing some racing game, the same track over and over, trying to beat an old ghost of his. But, you could tell he was growing tired. Every lap, he lost a few seconds here and there, or he'd needed to restart. You tried to give him space. He'd been in one of his moods.

Simon never pushed you away, but he did wrap himself in a protective layer of quiet. He would say less, he would answer in wordless grunts or looks, and he would sleep more, turning inward on himself like a flower in the night, closing up in the face of the darkness.

But, you needed him. Badly. You wanted his warm mouth and his skin to cover you again. You wanted him to grab you like a lifeboat in a storm, out of need.

You rose, letting your blanket fall behind you, stalking over to him in his huge tee shirt and nothing else, your hair messy from your shower.

"Si?" You whispered as if you were giving the secret password to an underground club, a secret organization, a code you weren't supposed to have.

It worked. It opened the arms of your man. He paused the game and spread himself wide for you, like a big, sleeping dog, belly up. You mounted his hips and leaned into the crook of his neck, wrapping your arms around the heavy muscles there, and you felt him relax his body into yours, melting into you like thawing ice.

"Let me keep you warm," you begged quietly into his neck, soft enough that he could barely hear you. The music from the game's menu beat softly in the background.

He knew what you wanted. You'd gotten into the habit lately. It had happened wordlessly the first few times, you sinking yourself down onto his hard length, wrapping him in your wet, warm body, coaxing him to swell with your fluttering core.

Now, you'd been asking for it, and he obliged you. You felt him digging into his sweatpants for your prize, ready and willing to be comforted by you. The head of him prodded gently at your hole, spread wide as you straddled him, fully vulnerable to him, ready to let him have you however he wanted.

You felt it slot into place, thick and solid, and you began the slow, long descent. Each inch of him stretched you more and more, filling you up, completing you like your missing piece.

You heard him sigh, and you felt the breath against your neck. It washed over you like a reward, telling you exactly how much he needed you, how much he wanted you to need him. Once he was fully sheathed in you, he ran his cheek over your cheek, smelling your clean scent, his dark voice coating you like smoke in a burning house,

"Mm, tha's what you wanted, innit, pretty thing?"

"Yeah, Si. That's what I wanted. Can I stay here, just for a little while?"

He shifted his hips and pulled you in closer, locking you in to his body and pressing himself even deeper than you had felt him in a long while. With his hands wandering under your shirt, he felt the smooth, warm skin of your back, petting you gently, soothing you to sleep.

As you were on the edge of sinking into slumber, he sighed again and said,

"As long as you need, love."

[mika-writes-fanfics]

So ik you don't usually do hawks but, is it possible for a hurt no comfort one where reader slowly pushes him away for reasons he doesn't know? (Youve been popping up alot on my "for you" and I love your dabi writing) gender netural pronouns Please

Honestly, this is great timing because I’m writing an angsty scene with Hawks in my long fic. I got really inspired by this request so it’s in drabble format. This could be read as either platonic or romantic. I hope I've done your request justice!

Hawks x reader who pushes him away

Tags/warnings: angst, hurt/no comfort, pre-established relationship (romantic OR platonic) with Hawks, Hawks/Reader

It’s the second week in a row that you haven’t responded to any of his texts, any of his calls, or even any of his knocks on your door. Just seeing his name on your lock screen is taxing enough as is. Hearing his voice on a call or standing in front of him was out of the question. Ghosting him was about as much as you could do. 

But this decision is far from impulsive, despite how sudden it must seem to him, if he even noticed your quiet feelings at all. No, this was a long time coming. It took you awhile to rationalize it in your head, to figure out what you needed to do. Your first solution was to ignore it. You quickly realized that approach just wouldn’t work.

Everytime he was with you, all you wanted was to laugh with him, to stay up late talking anything, to lie next to him peacefully, like you used to. But you couldn’t. The laughs you gave at his jokes were strained, the conversations you had were disingenous, your slumber at his side was plagued with unpleasant dreams. Everything involving him was colored with darkness, tainted by the gnawing thoughts in the back of your head. Keeping up the facade felt like slowly suffocating. 

For your own sanity, you pulled away. Bit by bit, day by day, you cut yourself off from him. You spoke to him less, you saw him less, and you spent more time alone. It helped, for a while, until even your mediocre false-front left you feeling far too drained. It all just reached a breaking point two weeks ago, when you finally accepted the truth. 

You couldn’t pretend anymore. 

This has to end. 

Which brings you to now, hearing Hawks knock at your door for the fifth time this week, desperately asking if you were okay, if he had done anything, if you could just speak to him once. You feel paralyzed. You can’t move from your spot on the couch, completely immobilized by the sheer fear of him being so close to you, separated by a mere wall. The anxiety and sadness you feel in this moment keeps you anchored down. 

“Dove, please just talk to me. I’m begging you,” he pleads. You can hear the desperation in his voice. His confusion is painfully clear. Your eyes burn when his voice breaks and he begs, “Please. Just please. Let me fix this, tell me how to make this right. I don’t want to lose you.” 

Hearing his grief feels like a knife to the heart. 

But as much as his devastation hurts you, you don’t have the courage in you to look him in the eye, or to even say a word to him through the door.

The tears start trailing down your face, and accompanied with them the urge to let out choked wails of genuine pain, but the thought of him knowing that you’re home forces you to swallow down your sobs. Any wails that manage to worm their way out of your throat are bitten down and muffled into your hand. Had the door separating the two of you not been so thick, you would be able to hear that Hawks isn’t fairing much better than you. Shaky exhales escape his lips as his heart aches with the pain of losing you, for good. 

[hanasnx]

I've come to elaborate on my get it up is douchebag ani vibes.

It's the specific vibe of him wanting you, but yr dating someone and so he starts messing around, developing a new attitude. Getting a lil bit meaner, a lil pushier. He knows you have feelings for him but that you've been scared Abt them sooooo

One night while yr partner is out of town, he finally makes a move tehe

fuckkkk reading “getting a lil bit meaner, a lil pushier” DKFJLSDJ bully me—

like imagine if he didn’t do much until you were cuffed, made him realize how much he liked your simpy attention. how much more you hung around him and how easy it was to tease you. but now youve got a shiny new boyfriend taking all your time away from him. who do you think you are?

getting all up in your space, curling a lock of your hair around his finger. “how is he?”

“he’s fine,”

“i mean in bed, sweetheart,”

“ani,”

“c’mon,” he juts his chin, handling your waist. “we’re friends, right? you can tell me.” the way his voice lowers, looking down at you making you feel so small.

“we haven’t..” you glance to the side, sheepish to admit this to him.

“you mean—?” his eyes widen, “he hasn’t fucked you yet?” you wince at his bluntness. the notion doesn’t make sense to him. he’s losing his mind right now being this close to you, smelling your perfume, seeing your perky tits in this skin tight crop top.

heat rises to your cheeks, it’s adorable.

“bet you’re fucking horny, aren’t you? let me fix that.”

[abimee]

was trying to write a post but it just wasnt coming out how i liked it or conveying what i was thinking about the jist of it was that i was thinking about how i used my art as my only tool in isolation to think about things that people tried to teach me was ''wrong'' like being trans or having acne but of which i never understood why it was ''wrong'' as a kid, so i ran off to my secluded corner to draw up what i was thinking about and how i really struggled wanting to show what i was seeing because there was no tutorial or online tips or refferences on how to do things, i didnt have any icons i was looking up to because they were isolated and hidden from me for the exact same reason, so for a long time my art felt like it was me trying to ''call out'' into the darkness to an idea i could just barely see on the horizon but couldnt get to through the murky depths of isolation and being told that art has to be a certain way and people need to look a certain way in it

to finally getting to a point where i seemingly managed to grasp that idea and shine a light onto it and have the depths disappear and everyones voices fade out until all i could see was the image clear in my head, and i was able to draw what i wanted because i finally ''understood it'' --- and this is about a lot of things in my art, like discovering i was trans or letting go of my fear of having self harm scars or acne scars or gaining weight, or even just random bullshit like having red cheeks or crooked teeth or weird looking knees. like i grew up rooted in so much self hatred and around people who were so mean and judgemental and i felt like i couldnt even fit myself into the little box of expectation placed before me and my friends that even when i ran away to my art i felt like i was trapped by the will of the world around me with nowhere to go and no way to communicate my sadness, because above all else i really do think all i wanted when i was younger was for people to be happy and to be happy myself, but i felt like i was being strangled by the thoughts and ideals of those around me to even the smallest degree, like a passing judgemental remark about someones self harm scars or crooked teeth

so now that i can draw that and communicate a positive love for people, that everyone is amazing and that nobody is ''wrong'', that love ive had since i was a kid for the world around me and everyone i met, it feels really good!! i cannot explain how much it means to me that people let me draw this way and respond psoitively to it and are moved by it because it feels like ive been locked in a box all my life not knowing what to do or what i was thinking about, and someone finally opened up the box and let me out and showed me what it all means. does that make sense? i feel like my art was a gateway to recognizing my own identity and who i am and to tell me that its not Wrong to be a certain way, that the people i was raised around were not telling the truth, that i wasnt a failure or doing something wrong when my teeth yellowed beyond my control or acne started showing up on my skin, that it wasnt wrong to have mobility aids or be suicidal or gain weight

like when i look back at my old art i see younger me who was struggling with a lot and just wanting to understand what it all meant, and as i grew up and put my art out there i was shown that the world wasnt a mean and cruel place, that it didnt have to be, and it really allowed me to open up and draw more. this post makes about as much sense as my draft but i just wanted to say all of this to say THANK YOU to everyone who has supported me because it really does mean more than you will ever know in so many ways!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! if youve been here for a while you may have even seen how much happier i am now and how my art has developed as i got happier and its all because i know now that the world doesnt have to be cruel!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

thank you !!!!!! (^ old art i drew as a 15 year old as a thsank you)

[piffany666]

(I came up with this and now im making it everyone's problem)

Back when warden was working for the department and vega was their "patient"

_________________________________________

Warden: Epiphany. By Inchoate.....W. I was not expecting this, this was so much more, you have stayed the hungry hunters, you have locked deaths door. For all your skulking, slinking, sneering, for all I was...fearing. I was not expecting this. For you to step into the light and reveal yourself. I see you. I see the lamb you hide under the wolfs skin i was- ahh!

Cutie: warden! What are you up to?

Warden: haha!...umm nothing! Notes! J-just umm going over some of our little friends downstairs' notes! C-can i help you?

Cutie: i thought id see how being isolated from everyone else in the department is treating you

Warden: oh? Thats...thats kind (?) Of you

Cutie: anything on your mind?

Warden: oh plenty; dealing with the fact that the place i work for imprisons my own kind, vega being....vega you know the usual. I was actually thinking about visiting aria but well...work and plus somtimes the d(a)emons there can be a bit-

Cutie: yeah thats great, anything els?

Warden: what...?

Cutie: oh come off it warden, i saw you in the brake room the other day

Warden: how do you mean...?

Cutie: look, every day we get thrown with the next mortal terror to deal with, were always being brushed off our feet! The other day me and sweetheart where stressing out about the next big disaster and you could hardly be bothered by any of it, you where just there, staring wistfully off into space while running your finger around the rim of your mug!

Warden: i was.....detracted

Cutie: you like somone!

Warden: WHA- I! T-thats! I-i mean i-i really don-

Cutie: called it! Sweetheart owes me a 5ver! So~ who is it~?

Warden: i dont have to tell you anything!

Cutie: is it the head of the department?! I know youve been talking about them a lot lately

Warden: i-is this an interrogation now?!

Cutie: so it IS the head of the department!

Warden: i-its no! I-its not the head of the department!

Cutie: alright alright! Were getting somewhere! I-its not agent is it? (Agent from the audio "a matter of urgenc" - the one with the southern accent) oh warden you could do better better i mean did you see what he was wearing the other day?

Warden: i-its not agent and I don't want to do this! OK? Now if you could just let me-

Cutie: sweethearts taken but that doesn't necessarily mean it's NOT sweetheart~

Warden: NO NO

Cutie: wait are you being so dodgy about this because it's one of us?

Warden:.....

Cutie: laughs* IS it sweetheart? Is it!?

Warden: I'm literally begging you....

Cutie: realises* alright fine fine have it your way keep you precious secrets but between you and me can I at least offer you a bit of advice?

Warden: I get the feeling you're going to anyway

Cutie: look nobody's going to notice you if you don't notice yourself first

Warden:.....what?

Cutie: OK look that came out wrong but what meant is take care of yourself because I know you Warden you will give yourself away until there's nothing left of you to love

Warden:......thats not fair.

Cutie: oh its true and you know it.

Warden:....maybe

Cutie: look I'm telling you this as a friend just think about it OK? Whoever this is they'll see how great you are not because of what you have to give away but because of where you stand firm and after all of Well whatever the hells been happening here you deserve something for yourself

Warden: hey that- that really means a lot thanks i- I will think about it

Cutie: good alright well I'm gonna head out

Warden: take care of yourself too

Cutue: Always do~ pew! pew!

Warden:....right where was I? Oh yeah yeah OK.

I was not expecting this for the sharp pain of jaws to give way to you-

OH MY GOD CUTIE! NORMAL PEOPLE KNOCK! NORMAL PEOPLE KNOCK!

Cutie: Sorry, sorry! Hey... it's not me, is it~

Warden: Oh would you stop!?

Cutie: cos if it is you know~....dance cards open~

Warden: just go away! Just go away!

Cutie: just putting it out there! Alright, alright.

[the-meadowlarks-cradle]

Bachira Meguru Regressor Headcanons

AHGHGH sorry this took so long!! Also anon youve inspired me to start blue lock again i forgot about how much i loved this silly little goober from the first few eps... i will soon. I really enjoyed writing these! I hope these are good ;w;👍

- Bachira is a permaregressor to me, or at the very least he slips into regression so easily and so often to some level that it's hard to tell when he's regressed and when he isn't. He has a lot of childish habits, and he still views the world through the lens of his child self due to being stuck there for a multitude of reasons, so it isn't really far fetched to say that he at least is regressed often.

- However, as a result he's actually rather good at managing things while small for so long. He's been made to become good at it, as this was probably an issue for a long while - but not that he really minds. He doesn't really think being small so much is a problem for him, if he can still function then what's the harm in it?

- Though, this makes fully slipping into regression harder, surprisingly. He's not used to having some level of control over being a child, and when he is fully regressed he tends to cling to the first person that seems willing to take care of him - as much as he feels bad for doing so. This tends to be Rin - and as much as he acts annoyed about it, he's actually more than happy to support Bachira however he needs. He just won't admit it.

- I don't really think he would change a lot between being his big age and being regressed, he would still keep the same interests so there's a lot of overlap in what he enjoys. It makes it relatively easy to find what he would like and what helps him feel best when small, such as children's media and of course, soccer. Soccer especially, since he's been playing from such a young age its a comfort activity at this point.

- And as happy go lucky and whimsical as he is, he is rather easy to make cry, especially since he generally is rather emotional. And sure, whilst he's relatively easy to calm down, it never really feels good in the moment to have made a child cry... since he's rather easily distractable, that's typically the best way to calm him down enough to talk about it. He's also easily forgiving, he doesn't really stay upset for long and so he tends not to get upset at people that make him cry.

- On that note, he doesn't even really have tantrums either. If he does, it's about a lot more than just the thing that set them off, and he needs a lot of time to actually wind down from them. But typically, he just gets a little upset - but moves on rather quickly. It's more so when he's small, he has way more energy and the world is a much more fun place to him so he worries much less - it very much is a coping mechanism for him.

- I feel even after he initially managed to start healing from his childhood trauma and slowly was able to start actually functioning as the age he is more, instead of his brain making him stuck as a child, there still would be a lot of times where he would fall back to his coping mechanism of regressing, but have even less control of it now as he isn't used to it as much anymore. I feel at first this would scare him - its hard, not having control of something you used to manage so well, but he would grow accustomed to that and realise its okay, and despite being small he will always find a means of some support - from himself, or from others.

[chososcamgirl]

HIHIHI SIGMA ALPHA IYA‼️🤗 SOOO ERMM SORRY FOR DISAPPEARING FOR TWO DAYS… I HAVE A LOT OF TESTS THIS WEEK SO I GOT RLLY BUSY 😢😢 I HOPE YR HAVING A VERY SIGMA DAY 🔥🔥 IM GONNA TRY AND MAKE THIS CHECKUP RLLY FIRE TO MAKE UP FOR THE PAST TWO DAYSS

ITS OKAY POOPIE I COULD NEVER BE MAD AT U 🤗💗‼️ WERE BOTH IN THIS TG.. we are A PACK… I HOPE YOUVE BEEN TAKING GOOD BREAKS THO‼️ BEING BUSY IS SO DRAINING SO MAKE SURE TO GET LOADS OF REST TOOO 🐺🙏💪

OKOK SOOO I GOT MY TEST RESULT BACK AND I ACTUALLY KINDA COOKED⁉️⁉️ I CANT BELIEVE I DIDNT FAIL 😭😭 GLAD THO CUS THAT MEANS MY GRADES ARE STILL UP 🆙🔥💪 IM TRYING TO WORK ON A SLEEP SCHED BUT ITS SO HARDD 😢 BUT I HOPE YOUVE GOTTEN MORE SLEEP + STOPPED ACHING

ORNENRNDNF I HAVE PLANS TO DRIVE TO THE MALL WITH SOME FRIENDS AND IM SO EXCITED SINCE ITS BEEN A WHILE SINCE I WENT TO A MALL (had to restrict myself because of my HORRIBLE spending habits.. 😪😪) IM SO HAPPY WHBEBENEJEEN 💪🐺‼️🔥🤗🤗

ITS ALMOSY SJAP WEEKEND… IM SO PUMPED… KINDA SCARED THESE CHAPTERS R GONNA CRUSH ME… IYA IF WE HOOKED UP WITH SUKUNA.. 😡 HE ENEBSBENEBDB WERE GETTING INNNN THE PLOTTT IM SO EXCITEDD FOR THIS SJAP WEEKENDSDD 💪🤗🔥

THESE PAST TWO DAYS WERE NOT SKIBIDI IM LIKE BARLEY MAKING IT THRU BUT HOPEFULLY TMRW WILL BE SIGMA SINCE I HAVE PLANS WITH FRIENDS‼️🤗 I ACIDENTALLY FELL ASLEEP IN A CLASS AND MY TEACHER TOLD MY MOM WHICH RESULTED ME GETRING MY GYATT BEATEN 😢😢 I NEED TO MAKE SURE IM LOCKED IN FOR REAL REAL NOW CUS MY TEACHER IS OUT HERE TO GETTTTTT MY ASSSSS 😖😖😣😫😔😰 AND ALSO I THINK I HABE AN INGROWN TOENAIL OR SMTHING CUS LIKE IT LOWK HURT ASF BUT IT DONT LOOK LIKE IT.. MY FRIENDS WERE POINTING OUT HOW I WAS WALKING WEIRD AND JTS CUS IT HURTS LIKE HELL EVERY STEP 💔💔😩😩 SEND TIPS FOR HOW TO TREAT JT CHAT‼️🔥 I SWEARRR ITS GONNA BE THE DEATH OF MEEE 😢😢

+ ITS TECHINCALLY OCT.4 HERE (2AM) BUTTT ITS CLOSE ENOUGH TO OCT.3RD AND GUESS WHAG DAY IT WAS…. NATIONAL BF DAY (I found out thru all the stories my friends/mutuals were posting 💔) so happy national bfs day toge 😍🥰😘 PLEASE I NEED HIM SO BADDDD

M-m-mahiTOE…? *I utter in disbelief* n-no… this can’t be… iya…. How could you do this to me…. Why….?? *runs away sonbing* 😔😔 not very sigma… (OK TBHHHH.. UNDERSTANDABLE BUT I FUCKING HAtE THAT HO 😡😡😡 I’ll make an exception for you tho iya 🥰🥰😘😘💗💗

OK IK U LIVE WITH THE KANGAROOS BUT HAVE U SEEN THE ELECTION STICKER THIS YESR??? LMAO I LOVE IT SO MUCH CUS WHY IS IT LITERALLY A PIC OF MY FACE??? IF U HAVENT SEEN IT HERE https://www.nytimes.com/2024/09/05/style/michigan-i-voted-sticker-werewolf.html THATS THE LINK TO AN ARTICLE ABT IT BUT JUST LOOK AT THE PICTURE I DONT LIVE IN MICHIGAN BUT I WISH I DID SO I COULD GET THE STICKER 💔

ATOD ANSWERRRR… lowk……. Lighting McQueen 🤗🤤 OR THE BLUE MNM… THEY COULD GET ITTT 😍🤤

OKOKOK QOTD UHH A RANDOM HOT TAKE U HAVE SRY THIS ONES BORING IM TIRED ASF AND HAVE MY LAST EXAM TOMORROW ‼️‼️🔥 WISH ME LUCK + GN (morning for u. 😘)

LOVE U LOTS SIGMA 🤗‼️🐺🙏

-🐺

HI ALPHA!!! 🐺

this is the ask from friday or thursday i believe… but i saw ur other one SO DW IM ANSWERING BOTH😈 ITS OKAY!! don’t feel pressured to send one in every day bc i know it can be a lot but just know ur asks are always appreciated and ily <3

YES i’ve been working for the last 4 days opening and closing basically and it’s so customer orientated like ARGHHSH my body is just exhausted BUT I HOPE UR DOING WELL TOO!! the pack must stick together🙂‍↕️‼️

YESSS I KNEW U ATE… the power of the pack manifested together to make you cook🔥🔥 also omg me and u both have horrible spending habits… i leave my room and i drop $300 on random shit but even if i stay in my room i just go online shopping which is SO BAD like ive spent $5000 in the last two months…. oops!

YAY FOR SJAP WEEKEND!!! NAUR ur teacher is a OPP fr like hello there was no need to tell ur mum😒😒 also THE INGROWN RAIL HELP i hope it heals soon i’ve never had one before so i don’t know the pain💔 SEND REMEDIES CHAT‼️‼️ also i hope the weekend is better for u alpha and i’ll use the power of the pack to manifest next week is better too <3 LMFAO HAPPY NATIONAL BOYFRIENDS DAY TOGE

yes mahito… he is my guilty pleasure in a way… IDK HES JUST SO… idk i can’t explain it.. forgive me pls🙇‍♀️🙇‍♀️🙇‍♀️ LMFAO THE STICKER HELP😭 NO I LOVE IT I WANT IT PLS

AOTD‼️ my hot take is that lychees taste bad🙇‍♀️ IM SORRY THEYRE JUST SO GROSS😭 LMK URS ALPHA!! ILY🫵🫵

[sarahfabray]

Lockdown reflections

TAGGING ➝  Sarah Fabray, Immy Cortes @corimmy

LOCATION ➝ Locked down at Table and Ice.

TIME FRAME ➝ 10/13 afternoon.

WARNINGS ➝ None.

SUMMARY ➝ Sarah and Immy share stories

Sarah Fabray

Sarah picks herself off the floor and seeing Immy in her office walks over to the door. "So this is your office huh? Must be nice to have some familiarities whilst all this is happening?"

Immy Cortes

Immy turned to look at Sarah when she spoke, a small smile spreading on her face. "Yeah, it is. Makes me feel like I have a bit of control, too." She said, and then laughed "Not like, control over people, just over myself, or the situation, or...something."

Sarah Fabray

"No I get it." Sarah agreed, stepping further into the room. "Control gives us comfort. It's the things we cant control that give us the most axiety and this." Sarah gestures to the space outside. "This is completely out of our control." Taking a seat at the other side of the desk. Smiling at a memory in her mind. "You know when i lost everying. When it was all out of my control. It's was like the lowest point of my life. But you know what. It was after that that my life became the best it could ever have been." She picks up a paperweight from the table. Playing with it. "There's a lot of good that comes when we take time to learn from these moments." She covers Immy's hand for a second. "I know its not a lot and we are kinda forced in here but I just wanted to thank you for being so opening to everyone here. It's the little things that make a big difference. So thank you."

Immy Cortes

Immy was surprised to hear Sarah say all of that, she didn't think she was really doing anything that anyone wouldn't do, but it certainly made her feel good to know that something she was doing was at least making Sarah feel welcome here. "That's what they say, right? The great thing about rock bottom is that there's nowhere to go but up. What happened, can I ask? You don't have to tell me anything you don't want to, obviously, i'm just curious."

Sarah Fabray

Sarah paused for a second pondering Immy's question. It had been a while since she had thought back to her before days. "Hmm, thats very true." She thoguht for a second longer before sharing her story with Immy feeling safe and seen in this moment. "I was a top lawyer in New York, engaged to be married. I had the money, the reputation, and family and religous backing and then the next moment it was all gone." Sarah chucked at the memory of how different her life was now. "My work didnt want a discrased Fabray as partner, I realised I was much more sexually open than i realised. and with that came facing my religon and my family. I lost everything." Then Sarah looks stright at Immy in a wistful look. " But you know what my life is so much better now. I'm so much happier. But it took me going to rock bottom to find it. And hay i get to help people and own a kick ass business and have some amazing life experiences." Sarah gestures to immy " I mean look at you, youve built this whole empire right here too. You must have gone though a lot to get here?"

Immy Cortes

“Wow,” Immy said, her voice practically a whisper as she sat down at the desk. She was surprised that Sarah had shared so much with her. “All of that because they couldn’t accept your sexuality? That’s so gross of them.” Immy smiled looking around. “Yeah, I mean I had help, my brother always believed in me and helped every way he could. And when he passed away he left everything to me and my daughter. So I was able to invest and actually get this place going. But yeah, losing him sucked and definitely counts as going go through some things, I think.”

Sarah Fabray

"I know" she acknolegded with a sigh. " To be fair though i think a lot of it had to do with me accepting myself." Sarah felt comfortable here with immy. She loved seeing her appreciate what she had achieved. "Thats amazing" She said with a smile "Man i wish my family was just as supportive. But i have to say my found family is just that. Thats amazing that your brother had such faith in you. im sorry you lost him. Im so glad you were able to build something from that. It's a beautiful legacy to create from it all. When this is all over I hope your able to reopen quickly. if you need a hand at all let me know."

Immy Cortes

"It's hard to accept yourself sometimes. I get that." She reached out to give Sarah's hand a tight squeeze. "I'm sorry your family isn't supportive, but found family is so important, and it's amazing that you've got one to be your community." Immy looked around, shrugging a shoulder. "I don't think it should be too bad. I mean, everything will need to be cleaned up, and we'll have to replace all of the food, but at least there was no damage."

[6lost6but6trying]

December 25. 2023

Dear Tiara,

Its been a while since iv done these but im going to try to write like my sappy old self used to….

I know i told you that i missed you

I miss you in the most innocent way possible

Yes we may be perverts and had a big of a “intense” physical attraction….remember “ SELF CONTROL” x3

But besides that…

I miss you when i dont see you

I miss you when i dont hear you

I miss your gentle touch when you held me, played with my hand and my hair…

It made me feel safe

The way i said my mind goes blank when im not stressing and feel safe, is how i have felt when iv been with you

All eyes on you

Youve gotten my full focus

Even when i talk to you on apex, my mind is with you and my heart is happy

This is probably why shes saying my heart isnt with her 100%

Im sorry this year was a total mess with this

I wish i could change it but at the same time i dont because it wouldnt have helped us realize stuff we know now

No matter if we have kissed and stuff like that…

I know youre flip flopping on if you should give me another chance as a friend….

Just know working on that friendship again im all in for

After you telling me about attachment styles…

It made me visualize how you and i can work on our own attachments even if we are not together…

And still be in contact..

Please again dont think i never cared about our friendship….

I really did i was just in a mess and didnt know what to do

I used to be so much better at relationships back then

Then i fell in a deep black hell hole and didnt know what to do anymore

Marco knows im not the happiest without you…

But he just goes with the flow of how i go…

He and Natalie are on your side now

They thought i was in the best relationship and now they changed their minds…

Im starting to as well…

I feel like i stay because of the good days…theres been more good days than bad but when bad comes around…its BAD bad…

We never attack the problem,

We attacked eachother…

I may have made a mistake but not really because its helping me realize things…

I just know i miss you

I miss your hugs

I miss your high fives

I miss you calling me “little shit”

And mind you when you say that… my little inner self gets all giggly and happy each time, i have no idea why but he does🙈

I miss when you challenge me to figure things out with puzzles

I miss you always talking shit about how you beat me on mortal kombat

I miss you beating me on beatsaber and calling me trash even tho you dont mean it in a bad way

The way you say it, your movement and such, nobody else says it like you and it just makes me smile and i dont even get mad…

I miss you making us dinner

I miss eating and talking with you

I miss our therapy session at home and apex even tho we didnt have to have them but we do and it helps me get to know you and the way u think better…

I miss your laughter

I miss your face

I miss our interactions in general

Im so sorry we got us into this mess

But i sure miss you alot….

A part of me still wishes we couldve worked out

A part of me when marco said to do it with you and i said no…i actually wouldnt have minded helping you experience it but a part of me wants to be more than just a toy for you to try stuff on…

But a major part of me still wants to work it out with you as a friend way more than anything and if things form and we grow wiser and more aware of things we want and being with eachother is still a want… then my heart will be yours… i believe deep down i never given Someone my heart yet…more like i did at some point but she showed a true color and i took it back…. My puppy self is still looking back at you from outside that glass window you have provided

I just realized

When things were happening with us 3, she had a door open so easily for me while you just had a window open and a door locked…

A part of me just wants to put a ladder on that window, climb up and go in and feel the safety feeling and knock the ladder down so theres no going back. The wide open door she gave me seemed too easy and not secured….

Im sorry for everything & i offer you my friendship and whatever else….

I do care about you alot…

Again im so sorry 😞

Will you forgive me?

Hug for yes

No hug for no

The choice is yours my tiara 💕 👑

~Love: Your old work husband 💍