#tell me a story about a 16 year old whos mom has been dead HALF her life already like my friend. i was lucky enough not to deal with that
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I saw a post the other day that kinda pushed back on the way all coming of age movies are about sexuality and all high school stories basically center around who wants to fuck who and how that's like. Not really all coming of age and high school stories should offer since you know. Youth isn't about who you have a crush on and probably coming of age stories in particular should be far more diverse in subject matter than they are.
Honestly as someone who, when I was 'coming of age' age, hated coming of age stories and still do for the exact reason listed above (see the weird scene in It where we all sexualize a 13 year old girl because boys have crushes and surely there's no other way to portray this than feeling a child up with a camera to demonstrate boys have ~feelings~ Bev gets no equivalent scene because she's the object of affection rather than the subject feeling desire) I also wish there was diversity in those stories. And coming of age stories about adults- we don't stop going through huge life moments that change everything forever, but back to kids. When I was a kid I could have desperately used a coming of age story where the character has a sick and dying parent who does die by the end of the story and what happens after that. Granted I did just fine without it, but even without being asexual it's always irked me that coming of age stories don't seem to appreciate that kids have way larger problems and way better stories to tell then first crushes and first kisses for shit sake give kids who went through what I did as a kid some kind of story about what happens when your parent gets cancer and how complicated that is and stop assuming the biggest thing that happens around puberty is discovering sexuality that, if you were queer, you probably already noticed what you felt wasn't in a coming of age story anyway.
#winters ramblings#id actually LOVE to see a coming of age story about an immigrant child moving to a new country#and have the coming of age center around THAT instead of these bizarre vaguely adult explorations of sexuality#that honestly ive never related to anyway like maybe the allos get it but even THEY deserve more diversity in stories#SURELY even your local allos have a dad dying of cancer they desperately need to know what to do with#like deadass a therapist told me at 26 i was robbed as a child because of what i went through and i STILL cry when i think of that#but no coming of age is all sex shit because children according to adults dont have real issues#which tells me adukts writing the stories are MASSIVELY privileged or stunted by execs or straight up assune kids wont watch#a REAL coming of age story. also i want a coming of age story about a 40 year old who is going through a career change#and the struggles that come with late career change. the benefits of a late career change. all the complicated family goo around all this#just give me decent stories that arent too focused on fycking RELATIONSHIPS for once. have them there sure i dont care#but for FUCK sakes can we stop pretending a 13 year olds biggest concern us who they have a crush on??#my dad was DEAD and i knew only one other person who lost her mom way younger than me at 8#we did not understand each other and how could we when our situations were so different. BOTH of us were so highly alienated#because NO ONE not even each other could relate to a lot if the people around us. the only thing we DID have in common#was the sick feeling we got when someone would bitch about their parents having fair expectations or not giving them literally everything#we both had an 'at least you HAVE parents to hokd you to reasonable standards and all you do is SQUANDER it' even if our feelings werent#faur to our peers anymore than their feelings were fair to us. wheres the coming of age story about THAT#tell me a story about a 16 year old whos mom has been dead HALF her life already like my friend. i was lucky enough not to deal with that#until i was 24. she deserved better out if high school and coming of age stories too. believe it or not kids have REAL lives and problems#and im SO tired of no one writing anything but some sad kids books about it even if the books are SOMETHING to start with#like for shit sakes must NICEthat the worst thing YOU went through was realizing you had a sexuality but my queer ass#ALWAYS knew i was different and highschool highlighted that a BUNCH so unless we're exploring aroace teens that doesnt appeal either#great yet ANOTHER story about straight teenagers because THEYRE the ones who need guidance on how to express themselves#like they dont see strsight people storoes and sexuality EVERYWHERE plus the ACTUAL opportunity to date in high school#that most queer kids dont get or dont get in the same way. why is THAT the only story being told when its the most saturated and BORING#and also ignores that kids have REAL issues and NO angency. explore THAT. do ANYTHING but yet another fucking coming of age story#about straight kids having crushes on each other and thats IT like come on SERIOUSLY
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Oh god which one?
Lol okay FOREST LORE
Starting from the top to the bottom.
Tw! Abuse, cancer, near death experiences :)
My scars:
Back of my skull has a 2 inch scar and dent because my father threw me off a balcony when I still had a soft head as a baby. Idk how i'm alive. <6 months old
There's a scar near my ear from god knows what. It's about 1 cm long. Who knows.
My heart surgery scar! My second biggest one is currently sitting at 3 inches! Got this bad boy at 19
There's a scar under my chest line that's about an inch long that I got from falling down the stairs with my porcelain baby doll at 2 years old. Fun fact! The glass shard was an inch away from my heart! (Idk how im alive)
My cancer scar!! It's on my arm and is about 3 and a half inches long, making it my biggest scar. It's fully scar tissue and is very squishy. I was 6 :)
Theres a 1 cm scar on my wrist from feral cat rescue. Somewhere between 12-14? Ive worked rescue for 10 years so i have a lot of those.
Got a scar from my big boy at 16 just before he passed away. I begged god for it to scar so I could have a piece of him forever. It's the one and only time he's ever answered my prayers. It's 2 inches between my thumb and pointer finger.
8. On the same hand there is a Dot directly on my wrist that is a scar (checked by doctors) I apparently have had it since I came home from the hospital (I stayed 2 months after birth due to complications including Ecoli. Where I got that idk)
9. My next one I got when I was 4 and I tore my ACL. It's about a centermeter on my knee
10. The next one I have is on my foot. It's 3 inches and very light by now. It happened when I was 9. My mom told me not to walk barefoot on unstable brick because it will cut me. I didn't litsen. Had to walk funny with a gash to her and tell her she was right..
Not sure if they count but I have a lot of streach marks too from both fat gain and muscle loss, the extra skin moving in different ways. I used to be able to lift 230 deadweight when I was 17 but my disability took over and laughed in my face.
This being said, scars are beautiful, I hope you all enjoyed his old blokes stories
OH.. and uhm... litsen to your mother when she says not to go out barefoot..
@smoresasaur Kinda funny that ive been dead 11 times and have 10 scars... Life is such a funny thing.
scars in fiction: I got this trying to save my lover from an assassin- but tragically, I was too late. now I carry the mark of my failure with me always, and I can never forget~
scars in real life: so I was trying to open macaroni sauce with a paring knife
#scars#scars are beautiful#I love my scars#cancer#near death experience#feral rescue#cat scratch#story time#original story#FOREST LORE#{headcanons}「how i got these scars」#except in real life
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chapter one- who he never was- introduction
I’m not sure how to start this off.
The doctors told me it would be better to write all this stuff down to help with my memory, but I've never been good with introduction paragraphs. or introduction thoughts in this case, so i’ll start with the basics. My name is Anastasia, and I'm 16 years old. I have a lot of personalities, but my favorite one has to do with the fact I love love. if that makes sense. I love the feeling of love, I love loving others, i just.. I love love love.
I'm inferring that at least, as almost all of the posters in my room have a quote about love. My assumption is confirmed after seeing that the lights that adjourn the first clump of posters are hearts, and after skimming through my white bookshelf covered in dust, 99 out of the atleast 100 books have to do something with love.
I was told that I suffered a concussion during a crash I was involved in during the summer. my mom refuses to let me know what happened, telling me it will come when it comes. i don’t remember a lot to be honest, which is why i’m snooping around my own room, like a creep, but i guess not a creep in a way? I mean, the person i’m creeping on is myself, and technically I have permission. or is it just the creep in me- you know what, i’m just gonna stop talking.
back to what i was saying. I remember some names, and only two people including my mom, and also some feelings associated with it, but other than that, I can't remember jack shit. However, I still know all of the bracelet patterns I learned at summer camp in 5th grade. camp chattanooga 1, concussion 0. After I scour the underside of my bed, I find a box full of letters. all addressed to PEOPLE. WITH NAMES! AND STORIES. thank god past me had a passion for writing. The only issue with that is, some of the things I've made up or changed for, you know, my stories.
for example, test subject one. Wait, I hate that name, it makes me sound crazy. crush 1? no, basic. I know! victim 1. eh, it sounded better in my head. Whatever, code names don’t matter right now
victim one, carmen-
my first boyfriend, despite his name making him sound like a girl. I know this is a code name , but I know why I picked it. He had a girly name. That also made him sound like a summer boy.I had boyfriends before, but he was the real one, the one that stuck. We dated for a month in 7th grade, but he broke up with me shortly after. He wouldn’t even tell me why, had to find out a year later (by also being nosy). in the letter, one of the main points is an argument.. that happened a year after we dated.
what.
I don't know what to do with this information.
It feels like it’s pointing me in the right direction, but also pointing me right to a dead end. Also note that his name is on multiple letters in this box, and I have a hunch that there’s other things leading to him hiding in this room. I'll take this letter to one of the only people I remember, my best friend steve. she’ll remember something.
our weather might be bipolar, but i feel like recently august has always been hotter than it should. I'm wearing leggings, my white sneakers that have turned off white because of how dirty they've turned, a white tank top that was way too overpriced but made my boobs look good, and to top it all off, a zip up gray jacket. a cliche august core outfit, but i'm somehow still crisping up like a marshmallow.
I wanted to walk to be more aesthetic, but immensely regretted it a mile in, forgetting that even though it’s considered walking distance, it’s still 3 and a half miles.
As I walk into the small, low key library she works for, the century old bell rings throughout the store, alerting all of the college students just trying to study and the prestigious book worms I've entered the area.
As I walk up to the counter slowly, I scope around for steve. tilting my head to get a better angle around the shorter bookshelves, I still can’t find her anywhere. I end up walking up to the counter for help.
average height, brunette is at the counter. He has a lot of cologne on, as I can smell it from far, but it’s surprisingly not suffocating. it smells like he just came back from the beaches of Florida, so what’s he doing here? for some reason, it feels like he fits it but is a total outlier all at the same time. He doesn’t even notice me, as he seems preoccupied with sorting the $1.25 bookmarks they sell by color on the counter.
“hello welcome to legre scriptum-
…
anastasia?..”
oh shit.
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CAN CHILDREN SEE GHOSTS? 17 SPINE-CHILLING TRUE STORIES THAT PROVE THEY DO
Have you ever found your child talking to “someone” when they were alone in their room? Is it simply an active imagination or could it be a visitor from beyond the grave?
For most parents, when their child tells them about their new imaginary friend, they simply put it down to their child’s active imagination. Completely normal… right? Well, I wouldn’t be so sure. It’s a widely held belief that some children can see and connect with those who have passed on. A popular theory is that we’re all born with the ability to connect to the other side but, as we grow up and become more cynical and disbelieving of all things unknown, that ability disappears. The following chilling true tales of imaginary friends and unseen visitors in the dead of night might go some way in proving that our children can and do communicate with the dead.
Parents beware, you’ll be checking under the bed and in your closets after reading these horrifying supernatural encounters.
1. THE BELIEVER
I believe that there are happenings on this earth that cannot be logically explained. I’ve always been a little skeptical, but I didn’t completely denounce that ghosts exists.
However, I’m starting to think they are definitely real, and that little kids can see them.
Yesterday, Sunday, I volunteered to watch the little kids of my church while their parents were out volunteering. Our church meets in the community center, so that’s where I was watching the kids — one baby, and two 2-year-olds – a boy and a girl. And you are right, our church is not very big.
After the center cleared out, it was just me and one other volunteer. She had the baby in a side room, trying to put him down for a nap. I had the two-year-olds in the main room.
I had a “weird feeling” all day, and kept feeling like there was someone standing behind me, but chalked it up to being alone in the building. The kids and I were sitting on the floor and rolling a ball back and forth to one another when the boy asked if we could throw it instead. I said yes and we stood up. He ran towards me and threw the ball just out of my reach. It went behind me. I did not hear it bounce.
The kids looked at each other and started giggling. I whirled around and saw the ball suspended in midair for a split second before falling to the ground. The kids just kept laughing. They started pointing and saying what sounded like “the man! the man!”
That was all the “paranormal” that occurred yesterday. The kids didn’t say anything about “the man” for the rest of the day. It freaked me out, but I wasn’t scared. I just wanted to share.
2. IT WAS JUST A DREAM
My daughter used to tell me about a man who came into her room every night and put the sign of the cross on her forehead. I thought it was just a dream. Then my mother-in-law sent over some family photos. My daughter looked right at the picture of my husband’s father (who has been dead for 16 years) and said ‘That’s the man who comes into my room at night!’ My husband later told me his father would always do the sign of the cross on his forehead when he was young.
3. DADDY, WHO’S THAT MAN?
When my daughter was younger (maybe 2 1/2 years old) she slept in her crib in the room next to me and my wife. One night she was stirring and maybe a little frightened, so I went in to get her and brought her to our room. She was wide awake now in our bed and not scared at all now. She was looking wondrously at the foot of our bed saying “look at the lights, the sparkles….” Kind of playfully she kept mentioning “the lights”. Then she said “Daddy, who’s that man?” Pointing directly at the foot of our bed.
It was definitely unsettling.
We had bought the apartment from a very elderly couple who passed in the apartment a few months earlier. Probably never forget that.
4. THE CAPTAIN
A parent of one of my students told us in a meeting that she was concerned because her son (7 years old) talked about an invisible ghost who would talk to him and play with him in his room. He said the ghost was called The Captain and was an old white guy with a beard. The kid would tell his mom that The Captain told him when he grows up his job will be to kill people, and The Captain would tell him who needed to be killed. The kid would cry and say he doesn’t want to kill when he grows up, but The Captain tells him he doesn’t have a choice and he’ll get used to killing after a while.
I was always creeped out working with that student after that.
5. MY COUSIN TRACY
When my niece was about 4 she had an imaginary friend, which I don’t remember the name of. She would blame things she did on this imaginary friend but also talked about how this friend would watch Scooby Doo with her. One day I thought, why don’t I find out more about this friend. So I asked her to tell me about her friend. And she said, “She’s a she and she’s dead.” And I said okay, “Does she have a job?” and she said, “She does what my Daddy does!” Which is that her imaginary friend was a cop. Okay. So then I said, “Where is your imaginary friend a policewoman at?” and she said, “Right next to where my daddy is a policeman.” And I said okay. But then she said, “I met her when I was in my mummy’s belly. She touched me when I was inside.”
A few months before my niece was born my cousin Tracy had died. She was hit by a train. She loved watching Scooby Doo and had a ton of memorabilia. She was also a cop. She was a cop in the town that is right next to the one my brother-in-law is a cop in, my nieces “Daddy.” My niece’s imaginary friend was my dead cousin. There is no other way she could have known all that at the age of 4.
6. EMILY
when my sister was probably about 6 or 7, she had an imaginary friend named Emily. She told us Emily lived in her closet, wore an old black dress, and had long dark hair and she was the same age as my sister. My sister played with Emily constantly. My parents started noticing my sister acting weird. Just sitting in the middle of her room whispering to Emily quite a bit and acting a lot more distant towards them. I remember a very specific day, my brother was walking by her room and my sister was sitting in the middle of her room….but she turned around and hissed at him. He was scared shitless. He told me it didn’t even look like my sister. My parents ran up to her room and i could hear my sister just screaming and screaming as loud as she “Get out”.
I have no idea what happened in that room but I ran to the bottom of my stairs and the screaming stopped, I saw my parents holding my sister crying their eyes out, she was sobbing as well. I’ve asked her about it today. She’s 24 now. She told me that Emily used to tell her to do horrible things to herself. She actually used to wake up on the roof and not remember how she got there. I’m not kidding. Apparently, Emily absolutely hated my parents so she turned my sister against them. She hates talking about it so I never brought up that specific night. This all happened at my old house. When we moved into a different house, Emily was gone. I’m not making any of this up. My sister’s little friend was a really big deal to my family and messed things up for a long time. I’m just relieved we left that house.
I’m not making any of this up. My sister’s little friend was a really big deal to my family and messed things up for a long time. I’m just relieved we left that house.
7. JESSICA
A little after I was born, my sister Julia had an imaginary friend named Jessica. She was Julia’s friend for a long time, when things started to get a little weird. At first my parents shrugged it off as a normal occurrence, but after a while they began to believe that our house was haunted .One night as my parents put me (about one years old) to sleep, I begin to cry and point at the corner, my mom was still in there and began to try to comfort me, but I continued to cry and point at the same corner. All of the sudden, my sister walks into my room and points at the corner and yells “Jessica stop it!”
Immediately I stop crying and Julia says like it is completely normal that “Sometimes Jessica likes to put on scary masks and scare people”. My mom who was understandably freaked out stammers to my sister “Tell Jessica that if she can’t play nice, she can’t play here at all”.
A couple weeks go by and Julia tells my Mom that “Her eyes turn green when she is mad and her voice gets deeper”. My Mom didn’t know how to respond to this and just said “ok….”
Eventually Julia outgrows her “imaginary” friend and stops playing with her.
A year and a half later my little sister Abbey begins to talk, she then goes on to tell us about her friend that no one else can see. She then tells my mom about how her eyes turn green when she is upset. I remember this distinctly because she dropped a pan and it scared me. She asked Abbey what her name was and she said…
“Jessica.”
8. THE BOY IN THE TREE
My folks’ farm surrounds a cemetery, and my dad and my niece were walking down there. My niece (4) looks up and says “What’s that boy doing up in that tree?” There was no boy, but she insisted there was and could describe him.
9. YOU’RE DOING A GOOD JOB
My wife and I overheard my two-year-old daughter on the baby monitor wake up on Saturday morning and say “what? OK, I’ll tell her” then get up and come into our bedroom and told my wife “Mary says you’re doing a good job.”
Mary was her grandmother that she was extremely close too that passed away.
10. THE MAN IN THE DOORWAY
When my nephew was born, ten years ago now. Around age 2/3 He’d wake up in the middle of the night and when my sister and her fiance went to settle him down he’d be staring at the corner of the room, or at the open doorway saying there was a man standing there, that he came and talked to him at night. Sometimes he was scared, sometimes he was calm, but my sister was terrified!
11. MY FRIEND JOE
Not my kid, but something my mum said I did when I was little.
I had this imaginary friend named “Joe” – was pretty normal imaginary friend stuff to begin with, my parents would ask about him and I’d respond with something like “I like Joe” “He has curly black hair” “He likes to play outside” nothing interesting.
Until one day I come out with “Joe has to work a lot, but Joe’s boss doesn’t like him.” when asked why, I responded with “Oh, it’s because Joe’s black.” As if it was obvious. Now this wouldn’t have been weird at all if I hadn’t grown up in a very small all-white town. And I was about 3 years old, I didn’t know (or rather, hadn’t been taught) that racism was even a thing.
This continued on for a while, I’d mention Joe now and then, sometimes talking about what he did for fun, or his favorite things, other times mentioning that his boss hits him and shouts all the time.
After a few months, I go up to my mum one day and have a conversation that went something like this: “Joe’s really happy today. His boss isn’t coming back” ‘Why?’ “He’s dead” ‘Oh yeah? How did he die?’ “He hung himself from up there” (as I point up towards the attic door).
I don’t remember much of this, I definitely remember having an imaginary friend named Joe.
12. THE LITTLE GIRL
My grandfather had a camp on Lake Dering in NH when I was a kid. One day when I was 6 or so, I fell off of the dock and into the water. I couldn’t swim. While under, I distinctly remember seeing a little girl down there who told me to look up towards the sun and just keep kicking and I’d be fine. I swam to the surface just in time for my grandfather to swoop me up and pull me back on the dock.
And, yes, I found out later that a little girl drowned in the lake near that same spot (of course).
13. THE IMAGINARY FRIEND
When my daughter was three she had an imaginary friend named Kelly who lived in her closet. Kelly sat in a little rocking chair while she slept, played with her, etc. Typical imaginary friend shit. Anyway, fast forward two years later, the wife and I are watching the new Amityville (the one with Ryan Renolds) and our daughter walks out right when dead girl goes all black eyed. Far from being disturbed, she said “That looks like Kelly.” “Kelly who?” we say “You know the dead girl that lived in my closet.”
14. HER EYES WOULD FOLLOW IT
I had tons of experiences like this when my little girl was born a few years ago. From being just a few months old we noticed she’d randomly start looking over at something and giggling, like something was making her laugh. Her eyes would follow it around the room. And sometimes we’d feel like it was stood right next to us or behind us and then we’d noticed she was looking at it, or smiling in that direction. It never caused any problems though, in fact, when she was upset she’d look over at it and start laughing or smiling. And if we couldn’t find something we really needed, suddenly it’d appear right in front of us, when we knew we’d checked there a hundred times.
Stopped around the time she turned two.
15. PUNISHMENT
I was seventeen and babysitting a friend of the family’s six-year-old. he’d been in bed a couple of hours and I just peeked in to check on him. he wasn’t in the bed and when i opened the door wider, I saw he was standing in the corner, facing the wall. creepiest fucking thing ever. I asked him what he was doing and all he did was turn around, smile, and put his finger to his lips as if to say “shhh”. I asked him again what he was doing and all he says is, “leave us. It is the punishment.”
16. HE DOESN’T HAVE A FACE
My son from the age of three always tells me about the “creeper man” who lives in my mom and dads bedroom. He brings it up after he visits them. I made the mistake once of asking what he looks like. My son said “Oh, he doesn’t have a face.”
17. I WAS THE SAME
I tend to be skeptical also, even when I love reading about paranormal stuff, the only thing that has kind of freaked me out has been my nephew a couple of years ago when he was about 2 1/2 years old would talk to a man only he could see at my house and an old lady at his grandparents house.
My mother tells me I was the same, talking and playing with my grandfather for a few months after he died, I would call to him and hold conversations with him and even wish him good night before going to bed.
#CAN CHILDREN SEE GHOSTS#shared stories#paranormal#ghost and hauntings#ghost and spirits#haunted salem#myhauntedsalem
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Part of You. Spencer Reid x OC! Character. Chapter 7.
(not my gif)
Summary: Bridgett’s life gets turned upside down with the news that her sister is missing. The team travels to her home town to help find her.
Pairing: Spencer Reid x OC! Plus size character, Bridgett Mendez
TW: Mentions of rape throughout this whole chapter (If this makes you uncomfortable, do not read or engage), underage dating (17 year old and 26 year old), mentions of a gun, talk about death, finding a dead body, language. If i missed anything let me know.
Word count: 5.9k
A.N.: This chapter has a very dark and heavy story line, if you don’t feel comfortable reading the chapter with all of the trigger warnings up above, please do not read. This is mid season 6 Spencer (pre Emily’s “death”).
~ ~ ~
“You do!” Spencer laughs, his hand resting on Bridgett’s knee, his thumb slowly going back and forth against her knee cap.
“I do not! You’re the one that snores in my ear when you’re sleeping behind me and spooning me.” Bridgett teases back, shoving his shoulder playfully.
“Just when I’m extra tired.”
“Oh so that would be all the time.” Bridgett laughs, touching his cheek with her fingers. “What do you want to do this weekend? Hoping we don’t have a case interrupting it.” Spencer moves his hand up Bridgett’s thigh, staring at her intensely.
“You.” Spencer says quietly. Bridgett smirks at him, taking his wandering hand and holding it in hers.
“Is that so? Well I think that sounds like a pretty busy weekend.”
“Yeah I think it will be.” Spencer replies, making her heart flutter a little bit, taking her hand and kissing it.
��Bridgett, I need to speak with you. My office.” Hotch says, whizzing past her toward his office.
Bridgett and Spencer look at each other with wide eyes.
“You think he noticed?” Bridgett asks, hopping off Spencer’s desk onto her feet.
“Yes he noticed! I was basically 2 seconds away from making out with you!”
“But why didn’t he call both of us in?”
“You have to separate the suspects in order to get the full story.”
Bridgett glares at him, walking away quickly up to Hotch’s office. When she walks through the doorway she sees Rossi sitting in as well.
“What’s going on? Am I in trouble for doing what I was doing with Spencer?”
Rossi raises an eyebrow, glancing over at Hotch, now wondering what she was doing with Spencer.
“No. Shut the door and sit please.”
Bridgett shuts the door carefully, the walk over to the chair seeming like a mile away.
Hotch sighs, “When was the last time you spoke to your sister?”
Bridgett furrows her eyebrows, her mind instantly swimming, “On Sunday evening. We always call each other then. Why are you asking about her?”
“When was the last time you spoke to your parents?”
“I don’t.”
“When was the last time you had any contact?” Rossi questions, flipping through a folder in his hands.
“My mom called me about,” Bridgett pauses, thinking back in her mind, “A year and a half ago. She left a voicemail about how she was leaving my dad because he got another woman pregnant. But I’ve heard that so many times and I don’t care to speak to her anyway so I didn’t call her back. What’s going on?”
“Celeste is missing. Your parents reported her missing an hour ago. We just got the call about 20 minutes ago.”
Hotch hands her the missing person’s flyer, her sister’s senior picture with all of her information on the side. Bridgett’s heart drops into her stomach, staring at the paper in her hand. She automatically dissociates from the situation, everything in the room going dead quiet, tears welling up in her eyes.
“When?”
“Your parents last saw her Monday morning on her way to school.” Rossi says.
Bridgett comes back to reality, eyes flickering between Hotch and Rossi, her blood boiling. “Wait, wait. She’s been missing for 4 days and they just barely reported her missing? They haven’t seen her in fucking four da-“ Bridgett laughs in disbelief, rubbing the middle of her forehead in circles.
“We’re taking the case on. Your sister isn’t the only young girl missing. 3 other girls, ages 18-20 years old were reported missing within the past month.”
“Were any of them found alive?” Bridgett questions.
“Bridgett, we don’t know if they’re connected.” Hotch says trying to get her to calm down.
“I know I’ve been a cry baby every day of my life since you’ve known me, but I’m a big girl, I can handle the truth. I know you know if they’re connected.”
The two men give each other a look before turning back to look at Bridgett.
“It’s not for certain but we do have reason to believe they’re connected. And no, none of them were found alive. But that doesn’t mean your sister isn’t alive. We want you to do the briefing on the jet. I’m going to tell the team wheels up in 20.”
“Can I have a minute before we go?”
“Of course. We’re going to find her, Bridgett. I promise.” Hotch says, making a point to look into her eyes.
Bridgett gives him a small smile, trying to keep her tears at bay. As soon as both of them leave Bridgett breaks down, tears falling down her cheeks onto the paper still in her hand. She didn’t have to be as smart as Spencer to figure out who Celeste was with. She just hopes that she ran off with him and it wasn’t a violent end.
**** Bridgett sits by herself in the back of the jet while everyone else was up front talking. Spencer tried to ask what was the matter, but Bridgett just told him that she needed to be alone for a few minutes. He knew she was upset, but he couldn’t tell why, and he couldn’t hold her to make her feel better.
Hotch walks up to Bridgett, handing her the case file. She stands up and walks to the rest of the group, her hands shaking and her heart pumping fast as everyone gives her a questioning look as to why she was about to brief everyone and not JJ.
“Umm, so, we have 4 missing women in Erickson, Texas. Ages 17-20. Makayla Weber, Vanessa Davis, Elizabeth Jensen; all of whom have been found dead. Signs of rape before being choked to death and dumped at random… and my si-“ She pauses, sighing shakily, “My sister… Celeste Mendez was reported missing this morning.”
Everyone’s faces are a mix of shocked, horrified, sympathetic.
“My parents barely reported her missing a few hours ago even though she’s been missing since Monday night. And I didn’t tell you this back at the office, I’m sorry, but I know who the unsub is.”
Hotch raises an eyebrow, Rossi still stone faced.
“How do you know?” Derek asks.
“Garcia, can you search the name Joshua Wolfe please? E at the end of Wolfe.”
“Okay give me a sec… no criminal record, a few speeding tickets over the past few years, but nothing serious.”
“Are there any newspaper articles written about him? From high school?”
“Yes, star football player, quarterback, got The Erickson Tigers to state championship 3 years back to back, multiple offers from different schools for full ride scholarships for football.” Penelope says, listing off all of the “great” things written about him.
“Yeah he was all of those things. But he’s also a pervert. He’s dating my sister. He’s her soccer coach and when Celeste came to visit me 4 months ago she told me that they were seeing each other. I flipped, told her how disgusting it was, that it’s illegal, she didn’t care. She was ‘in love’ with him.”
“How long have they been seeing each other romantically?” Emily questions.
“Since early July, so about 7 months or so. She was 16 at the time. She kept saying that because the age of consent is 16 that it wasn’t illegal, but she doesn’t understand because she’s blinded by what she thinks is love but is just him manipulating her into falling in love with him and thinking he loves her back. It’s all part of his game. He makes you feel special, and good, and then he…”
“What? What does he do?” JJ asks, giving Bridgett a comforting hand squeeze.
“The thing to know about Joshua is that because he was a star athlete, he of course, got all the girls. He was handsome, athletic, popular, but he didn’t take kindly to being turned down from sex… I would know.”
“What do you mean?” Emily asks, her face reading that she already knew where this was going.
Bridgett looks at everyone’s eyes, all of them knew without her even saying the words. And worse of all, Spencer knew too, and she had to admit to her boyfriend in front of all their friends that one of the worst things that could happen to anyone, happened to her.
“My senior year, everyone was at the homecoming game, and I was a part of the student council. We helped set up concession stands, announced the homecoming court, all that. And when everything was all done and we had cleaned up for the night, my parents weren’t answering the home phone, and I had told my friends that I didn’t need a ride home so I was stuck. But Joshua saw me sitting in the parking lot, and asked if I needed a ride home. Of course I took it because it was Joshua Wolfe, all the girls wanted him, he was a charmer, handsome, had it all. So he drives past my house to this look out of the town, everyone goes there on dates to have sex, and I knew what he was trying to do, but I didn’t want it. He kept trying to kiss me, and stick his hands down my pants. So I got out of the car and tried to walk away, but he pulled a gun on me… told me if I didn’t get back in the car he was going to shoot me. So I got back in. Told me to get undressed and go to the backseat or he would shoot me. So I did. And then he forced himself on me. I told him I didn’t want it, but he didn’t care. He… he raped me. Then he pretended like nothing happened, threw my clothes at me and told me to get dressed. He took me back home. I told my mom what happened… and she had the audacity to tell me, that if I really didn’t want to have sex, I would have fought him off harder. That I should have made him get off me. So I called a friend and she took me to the police station. I talked to the sheriff and he said he didn’t believe me. That if what I was saying was true, that reporting it would be damaging for Joshua’s future career opportunities. I didn’t even get sent to the hospital for a kit. He got away with raping me. It got around at school that I reported him raping me, one of the girls I went to school with, her dad was an officer, so she told everyone. And it wasn’t hard for the rumor to circulate. But then Joshua came up with a story that I was drunk, kept making moves on him, he felt bad because I was crying that nobody would ever have sex with me because I was fat, and had sympathy sex with me. Of course that was the story everyone believed. I was the girl who cried rape and nobody ever let me forget it. I hated him, I have never hated a person as much as I hated him. And it was like he got off on me hating him, seeing me get taunted, and crying about the shit people did to me and said about me. People would follow behind me in the hallways and scream ‘rape’ at me, thinking it was funny. None of the teachers ever did anything about it.”
Bridgett couldn’t even look at them after the story, she couldn’t stand to see the sympathy in their eyes. She didn’t even want to know what Spencer’s face looked like right now. The jet was oddly quiet, everyone processing the last few minutes. Bridgett finally sits down, tears dripping down her cheeks remembering all the shit she went through the last 7 months of high school. JJ gets up out of her seat and hugs her tightly.
“Oh my god, Bridgy… honey I’m so sorry.” She whispers.
“You think he preyed on your sister to get back at you? He ruined your life in high school, maybe he knew how close you and your sister are and it was just another jab at you.” Spencer asks, finally saying something.
“It could be possible, yeah. It wouldn’t surprise me.”
“Did your sister know about the rape?” Rossi asks.
“No. She was 10 at the time and it was never something we talked about in the house because it was my fault.”
“It wasn’t your fault, you know that right?” Derek says quietly, placing his hand on Bridgett’s knee.
“I know that now. But 17 year old me didn’t. I believed my mom. I know Celeste is with him. They probably ran away together or something, I’m just scared that if he is the one that killed the other missing girls, it could happen to Celeste. Has he been at school?”
“Records show he was at work on Tuesday but hasn’t been back since. I have the last known address and am sending it to you now.” Garcia interjects, Bridgett looks up at the computer screen, Penelope had tears in her eyes as well.
Hotch hands everyone the case file before everyone goes off to read up on it. Bridgett stays sitting in the chair she had been, zoned out, not noticing Spencer coming to sit next to her until she felt a tight grip around her body. Bridgett relaxes into him, letting tears flow freely into his chest. They don’t speak to each other, Spencer respecting that she needed to let it out, he holds her head gently, slowly going down her hair to comfort her.
*** The team sets up at the police station, getting all the information they needed from the sheriff, the same sheriff that she reported her assault to years ago and didn’t take her seriously. Bridgett stays back from him, not confident in herself that she wasn’t going to yell at him.
“We’re heading out, checking out Joshua’s house. Reid, stay with Bridgett.” Hotch says. Rossi and Derek leave out of the doors.
“I wanna go.” Bridgett demands, standing up from the chair she was sitting in.
“You know you can’t go. We’ll keep you updated when we know anything.” Hotch replies.
Bridgett slowly walks over to Spencer, he pins the map of the town on the board in front of her. She wraps her arms around his waist, hugging him from behind. His heart breaks because he knew how lost and upset she was, and he really couldn’t do or say anything to help her. He turns around to face her, her eyelids were red and puffy, she looked exhausted. Spencer cups her cheeks in his hands, kissing her forehead twice, he didn’t care if the rest of the local police saw.
“I’m glad you talked about what happened. Probably not the setting you wanted to talk about it, but still glad. I’m so sorry you had to go through that, sweetheart.” Spencer speaks softly.
“I’ve wanted to tell you, but it’s so hard for me to talk about. That was the first time I ever got through it without crying a lot.”
“It’s okay. It’s hard talking about traumatic experiences. Have you ever talked to anyone about it?”
“A shrink? No. I probably should but I don’t know, it’s nerve racking.”
“Bridge, your parents are here.” JJ says, stepping into the room.
Spencer let’s go of Bridgett’s face, letting her walk out of the room into the hallway. “I wanna go in there.”
“Are you sure?” JJ asks.
“Yes I’m sure. They’re not going to talk to anyone else. They don’t like cops. I have a better shot at getting them to say anything.”
JJ sighs, finally nodding her head. “If you need to step out, we’ll be in the next room. Don’t let them get to you.”
Bridgett nods her head, walking to the interrogation room door, stopping before grabbing the door handle. She takes deep breaths, wiping her face with her hands to try and look less of a mess. She counts to 10 slowly before walking into the room.
“Mom. Dad.”
They both look up at Bridgett, her dad staying stoned face while her mom’s face softened.
“Hi mija.”
Here we go.
Bridgett sits down across from them with a sigh, opening her case file and pulling the missing persons report out of the folder, sliding it across to them.
“Why would you wait 4 days after your daughter is missing to report it? She never came home from school Monday and you didn’t think it was the slightest bit weird?”
“No. The past few months it’s been happening. Her leaving and not coming back for a few days. It’s mostly her leaving Friday morning and not coming back home until Monday night after school. But we called her on Wednesday and she didn’t answer her phone. She had a game Tuesday and she wasn’t there.” Her mom explains.
“She never missed a game.” Bridgett mutters. “And do you know who she was leaving with on weekends?”
“You’re the one that talks to her all the time, you don’t know?” Her dad snaps, hitting his palm on the table.
Bridgett stares him down, “Do you know every single detail about all of your kids? I bet you couldn’t name us in birth order. In fact, you couldn’t even tell me the color of my eyes. I’m there for Celeste since you guys clearly aren’t.”
“Bridgett.” Her mom saying her name in a warning tone. “You still need to respect your father.”
Bridgett laughs, “I need to respect him? He doesn’t know the meaning of the word respect! Look how he treats you! And the way he’s been treating you the past 24 almost 25 years!” Her voice raised in volume quickly, her voice ringing through the room. “Let me tell the ‘Parents of the Year’ something, she’s been having a sexual relationship with Joshua Wolfe, her high school soccer coach. She told me about it when she came to Virginia a few months back.”
Her dad gets up from the chair, making it fall to the floor and walking out of the room. Bridgett turns back toward the mirror, motioning for someone to go get him. She sees two of the local police follow after him as Emily walks in, sitting down next to Bridgett.
“Why does that name sound familiar? Joshua?” Her mom questions.
“Really? You don’t remember that this man raped me and you told me that it was basically my fault! You victim blamed me! And then the people you’re supposed to go to for help tell me that I’m going to damage his career if I cry rape! Nobody believed me and I had to emotionally and mentally live with the fact that I never got any help for my sexual assault! I warned everyone about this asshole and nobody believed me! And now my sister, my whole life, is missing and he needs to be suspect number one! I don’t give a fuck if he was a football star and a good kid, I know he has Celeste and you couldn’t even pay attention for 5 goddamn seconds to know something in your own child’s life!” Her eyes were cloudy with tears, her voice breaking and hoarse.
Emily stands up, trying to pull her out of the room. “Bridgett, you need to walk away.”
“Oh this shit again? He wouldn’t do something like that, Joshua is a respected person. It was so long ago.”
“And I’m still traumatized! Maybe if you paid an ounce of attention to your kids, one wouldn’t be missing and the other wouldn’t live states away to get away from you!” She yells, walking out of the room.
Spencer meets her in the hallway, enveloping her in a hug. He shushes her, stroking her hair. “Come here. It’s okay, you did good.”
“That’s the reason I left. That’s why Celeste was planning on leaving after graduation. I shouldn’t have ever left her.”
“It's going to be okay. We’re going to find her.”
“I’m taking her back to Virginia. She’s not staying here anymore.”
“Guys, we gotta go, they found Joshua.”
***
Bridgett automatically recognized the white vintage pickup truck parked in the driveway, the same one he had that night. Rossi, Hotch, and Derek were waiting across the street at the other house, a few other police cars parked in the street. Everyone hops out of the car, walking over to the other half of the team.
“He’s in there. We don’t know if Celeste is in there for sure. He’s saying she is but he won’t come out. Rossi’s trying to talk to him, coax him out.” Derek explains.
“He wants Bridgett.” Rossi says, moving the phone away from his mouth.
“No.” Spencer says from behind her.
“What do you mean no? I’m going in there.” Bridgett says, checking her vest and gun to make sure everything was in order.
“I agree with Reid, it’s too risky. Especially with how emotionally impulsive you can be.” Hotch replies.
“Bridgett might have the best shot of getting him to tell us where Celeste is. One of us will follow behind you and stay by the door outside, and we’ll be listening in.” Derek says.
Bridgett looks around at the rest of the team, waiting for the okay from Hotch, even though everyone already knew that Bridgett was going to do what she wanted.
“Morgan, stay with her, but fall back just enough where you won’t be seen. We don’t know what’s going to set him off. Bridgett, say the word and we’ll move in.”
“Got it.” She says, walking up to the house with her gun drawn out in front of her. Once she gets to the door she knocks on it, seeing Derek duck out behind an overgrown bush off to the side of her. The door opens, Joshua standing behind the screen door. He still looked the same as he did in high school, a 5 o’clock shadow on his face.
“I knew you would come running to be your sister’s savior. Look at you, filled out since the last time I saw you.”
Bridgett looked at him in disgust. “Where’s Celeste?”
“Why don’t you come inside and find out?” He asks, opening the screen door. She follows behind him, keeping her distance. Bridgett looks around the house, everything was neat and tidy, not a pillow, picture, or knickknack out of place.
“You need to answer my question. Where is she?”
Joshua sits in a chair, his arms laying flat on the arm rests.
“How much is it killing you inside to know what your sister and I do? That I had both you and her. And at the same age.”
Bridgett draws her gun on him, walks toward him slowly, “Where. Is. She? You have 15 seconds before I shoot you right in the middle of your goddamn forehead. Tell me where she is Joshua!”
“Well if you shoot me how are you going to find out where she is? Sit, talk to me a while. Let’s catch up.” Not so much as a blink coming from him when Bridgett drew the gun on him.
Bridgett rounds the corner of the couch, sitting across from him, gun still drawn on him. “You want to sit and chat? Let’s sit and chat, Joshua.” She spits, narrowing her eyes at him.
“She loved me. Loved all of me.”
“Mother fucker. Where is she? I’ll fucking kill you myself!”
“Got both the sisters on my scorecard.”
“Fuck you! Your piece of shit. Where the fuck is she? You don’t get it. My team has my back, just like all the boys on the team did after you assaulted me. They’ll vouch that you pulled a weapon on me, I’ll shoot you, clean shot. I’m the best shooter on this team, I don’t miss. Tell me where she is!”
The door opens behind her, the team flooding in, all of their guns drawn on him.
“Drop the bull shit, Joshua. Tell us where you have Celeste.” Derek yells, stopping next to Bridgett.
“Celeste found out about the other girls. She realized that she wasn’t the only one in my life, figured out what I had done to them. She threatened to call her big bad big sister, and I knew what I had to do.”
Bridgett drops her gun, her patience officially running out and charging him, kicking his legs from under him, his whole body hitting the floor with a thud. Bridgett climbs on top of him, wrapping her hands around his throat.
“Tell me where she is!”
“44th and McLeary. The Stephenson's old house.” He chokes out, his whole face cherry red. Bridgett holds her hands against him for a few more seconds, watching him struggle for air. Derek picks her up off of Joshua, handing her off to Spencer.
“Cuff him. I’m going.” Bridgett runs out of the house to the car, jumping in the driver seat. She sees Spencer slide in next to her in the passenger seat. The back doors open, Rossi and Hotch in the backseats waiting for her to floor it.
*** Bridgett presses on the brake pedal firmly, the whole SUV stopping suddenly. She puts it in park, not taking the keys out but jumping out. Hotch and Spencer block her path, stopping her in the middle of the driveway, both of them holding her back.
“Wait here. Do not let her in yet. We need to clear the house.” Rossi says, Hotch following behind him with their guns drawn. Bridgett watches them walk into the house. Spencer holds her against his chest, trying to get her to relax.
“I wanted to kill him. I looked in his eyes when I was choking him… and if Derek would have let me, I would have killed him.”
“Trust me, you’re not going to have to worry about him again. He’s not going to hurt you or your sister anymore.”
“We found her…” Rossi’s voice rings in their ear pieces.
“Celeste! I’m coming.” Bridgett runs into the house, her heart beating fast, a new wave of adrenaline coursing through her body. She goes to the back of the house and sees both men standing in the hallway.
“Bridge wait, she’s not… she’s gone” Rossi says, holding her arms. “You don’t want to see her like this. You don’t want that to be the last memory you have of her.”
Tears instantly started flowing down her cheeks, her whole body going numb. She gripped onto Rossi’s arms, collapsing against him. Bridgett sobs into his shoulder. He whispers ‘I’m sorry’ into her ear over and over again, trying to hold her up.
“No, I need to see her. I need to see if it’s her.” She cries.
Rossi looks at Hotch, waiting for his approval. Once he nods his head Rossi let’s her go. Bridgett walks forward, staring at her sister lying lifeless on the floor.
Celeste was left in just a tank top and underwear, her tan skin was now pale, her lips dry and a hint of blue on them. Her cheekbone had a purple bruise on it, one long bruise around her neck as well, dried blood under her nostril. There was a pool of dried blood surrounding her body. She drops to the floor next to her, moving her hair out of her face. Holding Celeste’s hand, crying over her body.
“No! Oh my god no. Celeste, baby come on, wake up. You can’t go. Call a medic, she needs help.” Bridgett calls out behind her, frantically looking to the three men behind her. Spencer drops down next to her, rubbing her back in comfort.
“Bridge, she’s gone.”
“No! Not my baby. Not my sister. I’m so sorry, Celeste. I’m so sorry. Baby I’m so sorry. Please. Please come back, Celly, please.”
Bridgett falls into Spencer's chest, clinging to his button up shirt and screaming in agony. Bridgett kept repeating Celeste’s name, screaming for her to come back. Spencer held Bridgett like you would hold a child, trying to keep her head against his chest and trying to shield her eyes from Celeste.
A few minutes passed, the rest of the team arriving at the empty house and heading to the back, Bridgett still inconsolable in Spencer’s arms.
“Bridge, Bridgett, honey your parents will be here any minute, we gotta get you up” Emily says, bending down to be eye level with Bridgett. Bridgett shakes her head, the rest of her body shaking against Spencer as she tries to catch her breath.
“I know you don’t want to be here when they come to see Celeste. We’ll just go to the backyard, get you calm, cleaned up, and then we’ll head over to the station.”
“Come on, babe, let’s get up.” Spencer says softly, looking down at her.
“Don’t leave me. Please?”
Spencer wipes the tears from her face, kissing her cheek. “I’m not going to leave you. I’m right here.”
Bridgett finally sits up, Emily helping Bridgett to her feet, giving her a big hug. Once she looks around the room she sees the team standing back in the hallway, their faces reading sympathetic. Bridgett clings onto Spencer’s arm as they walk toward the back of the house to the sliding doors to the backyard. Bridgett sits on a tree stump off to the side of the yard, Spencer sitting right behind her. She couldn’t form thoughts, focus on anything around her, stop crying, it was like she wasn’t in control of her body or mind.
“Bridgett?” Spencer calls her name, shaking her shoulder softly.
“Hmm?”
“Emily asked if you wanted anything to drink.”
Bridgett looks up at Emily standing above her. Trying to figure out if she had been standing there the whole time.
“Just water, please.” Her voice was frail and hoarse from all the screaming.
Emily nods her head, walking back inside the house. Spencer hugs her from behind, resting his chin on her shoulder. Bridgett rests her arms on top of his, stroking his knuckles absentmindedly. Spencer wanted to say something, but it needed to be better than just “I’m sorry.”
A few minutes later a piercing scream travels through the house and out of the back door to where Spencer and Bridgett were sitting. Bridgett picks her head up and looks through the window into the house, seeing her dad make his way out of the hallway and dropping to his knees. Both of them could hear her mother’s gut wrenching screams come from inside. As much as Bridgett hated her parents, they shouldn’t have to bury their child. No parent should.
“Hey, let’s go to the car.” Spencer says, trying to distract her.
“No. I wanna be here when the coroner picks her up.”
“Why don’t we go to the front yard, we can wait in the car, in the air conditioning, and you can see when they get here? I don’t want you to pass out from being in the sun and crying. Not to mention you haven’t eaten since before we left Quantico.”
Bridgett agrees after a few seconds, shakily standing up and walking with Spencer to the front of the house, sitting in the passenger seat next to Spencer, the cool air blasting against her warm face. Spencer handed her a granola bar, Bridgett rejecting, there was no way she could stomach food right now.
“Bridgett, I know you’re upset, and your world just stopped, but that doesn’t mean you can stop taking care of yourself. You need something in your system.” Spencer says, opening the wrapper for her and handing it back. Bridgett takes it, breaking it in half and taking a bite.
“I’m sorry. I’m not trying to be difficult, I just don’t know how to process this right now.”
“You’re not being difficult. You’re mourning. I want you to know you’re not going through this alone though. Okay? I’m right here, baby.”
“I know, thank you for being here, Spence.” Bridgett whispers, touching her hand to his face.
They sit in the car in silence, watching police walk in and out of the old worn down house. Finally the coroner’s van pulls up, a man and a woman stepping out. Bridgett steps out of the SUV, watching them take the gurney out of the back of their van. Spencer comes up next to her, holding her close to him. It felt like forever before they came back out wheeling her sister’s body in the white sheet, out of the house. Bridgett’s tears start back up once again watching Celeste be removed from the last place she was alive. Her parents followed after, they were holding each other and crying, her father and Hotch on both sides of her mom escorting her out of the house.
“Once we get back to the morgue you’ll be able to come in and identify the body. Your parents said that you’d be the one to identify her.” The man says in passing to Bridgett.
“We still have to identify her even though we know it’s her?”
“For our records, yes. We need a signature that you identified her. I am very sorry for your loss, ma’am.”
“Thank you.” She says quietly.
“Come on, I’ll drive.” Spencer says from behind her, enveloping her in a tight hug.
***
It had been hours since they found Celeste. Bridgett had to identify the body at the morgue, which mentally drained her even more. She couldn’t believe that her sister was gone, it didn’t feel real even after seeing her on the table with the blue sheet covering her.
Spencer opens the door to her hotel room, letting her walk in first. Bridgett slowly shuffles in, stopping in the middle of the room, staring at the floor. She feels Spencer’s hand on her shoulder.
“Bridgett, you should lie down. It’s been a long night.”
She shakes her head, not moving her body from its place. “Why is this happening? Why her? Why did he do this?” Tears start to flood her already sore eyes, her heart feeling empty. Her hands fly to eyes, pressing her palms against her eyes to prevent more tears from falling.
“I know there’s nothing I can say or do to make this feel better, but I am so sorry, Bridge.” Spencer towers over her, hugging her tightly. Bridgett breaks down into his arms for the 10th time that day. Her whole body convulses against him, violent sobs coming deep from her chest. Spencer rocks her back and forth, letting her get everything out.
“I-I should hav-ha-ve never left her. I should have stayed h-home until she was done with school. That way I could have protected her.”
“Don’t do that to yourself. It’s not your fault. None of this is. Hey, look at me, baby.”
Bridgett lifts her head, Spencer taking his thumb and swiping it across her tears.
“I’m not going back to Virginia until you go back.”
“Why? No Spence, the team needs you.”
“They’ll be fine. You need me more. I told Hotch about us and that I want to be here with you to help you through the planning process and everything after. I don’t want to leave you alone and have you deal with your parents alone.”
Bridgett sniffles, trying to compose herself. “You told them about us? Why now?”
“I dunno. I figured it’s time. Especially since I’ve been by your side the entire day. Is it a problem that I told them?”
“No. Not at all. It’s actually one last thing for me to worry about whenever we do go back home. Thank you for wanting to be here with me.”
“I’m always going to be here for you, Bridge. I always have you.”
#Spencer Reid#spencer reid fan fiction#spencer reid series#spencer reid x oc character#spencer reid fan fic#spencer reid x original female character#spencer reid fluff
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Lost or Found - 15
Summary: As Jay, Hailey, Kim, Adam and Kevin start their junior year in the wake of a tragic summer, the past year of their lives comes back to haunt them. If you enjoyed Pretty Little Liars, this is for you! *UPSTEAD/BURZEK High School AU
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15 - Glimmer ...
“Jay, this has to be perfect.”
Jay scoffed at his friend, who was attempting to paint massive letters on a blue sign. “This seems a bit extravagant Adam.”
Adam rolled his eyes, dropping his paint brush. He had asked Jay to come over a few hours prior to help him. It was Sunday, the day before spirit week and Adam was planning on asking his girlfriend to the homecoming dance the following weekend. The plan was simple: Jay (and Kevin, who ditched because he had an extra practice) were going to help Adam make all the shit he needed while Hailey kept her away from his house. Then after school Monday, Jay and Hailey were in charge of distracting Kim until he was ready. The only problem was, Adam’s ability to paint was about as good as his handwriting and the letters on the sign were equal to chicken scratch.
“I mean, you are already dating.” Jay continued.
“So,” Adam said, standing. “You are telling me that when you ask Hailey you won’t be holding a corny sign and a bouquet of flowers?” Jay began to speak but Adam kept talking. “Because I guarantee you, you will look like an idiot when every other girl has a cute story to tell.”
Jay shot his friend a dirty look, “Who said I was going to ask Hailey?”
“I hate you…”Adam muttered, groaning in defeat. He was sick of watching Jay dance around his feelings, especially since he knew Hailey felt the same way. He knew that he was the one that told him it was a bad idea in the first place, but he had retracted the statement a million times since then.
“Adam stop stressing, you know she will say yes.” Jay said, changing the subject.
Adam shrugged, “I know. That’s not the point. I just want her to feel special.”
Jay grinned, it was fun to watch his usually dickish best friend get all sentimental. “You know, sometimes you have these moments where I forget how much of a sarcastic little smartass you are.”
Adam glared at him. He then put on a fake smile and put his hand over his heart. “Really Jay? That means so much to me.”
Jay rolled his eyes and laughed as Adam got back to work. And even though Jay had dismissed him just a few moments earlier, he had planned to ask Hailey. He was right, it needed to be special, and Jay had the perfect idea.
…
Going back to school on Monday was a bit of an adjustment for Hailey. It was exactly the same as before, Jay picked her up (she really needed to start giving him gas money) and they met their friends in the parking lot and she went to her first block as normal. Except she had had heart surgery, and everyone knew that she was the girl that got trapped in a garage with a running car. That alone made people's stares a little more intense, but she also couldn’t seem to forget about the scar running up her chest.
It was crazy, she was wearing a t-shirt, no one could even see it. But she still felt like she had something she was hiding. It was all too familiar, she flashed back to just a year earlier when she began to hide the bruises caused by her father. There was something scary about her situation (other than the obvious facts), she moved to Chicago to escape the danger she was in, but somehow she had walked into something worse. And now she was a 16 year old with a pacemaker and a stalker, and she wasn’t a fan of either.
Hailey and Jay were walking to first block together, since they both had Criminal Justice. Hailey was still nursing the cup of coffee that Jay had brought her that morning, and she would admit that it made her morning much better. The two ways to her heart were coffee and pizza, and Jay had gotten pretty good at buying her both.
They settled into their seats (of course right next to each other) and Hailey pulled out her textbook. She noticed the sheepish look on Jay’s face and pushed it between them, it wasn’t the first time that he had forgotten his.
Jay smirked as he watched Hailey pull out her notebook and pencil pouch, the girl was a bit of a control freak when it came to her notes. Not that he minded, his looked like a five year old did them, so he’d be studying with hers anyway.
That’s how they spent the whole class: Hailey listening attentively and taking notes and Jay watching her listen and take notes. By the end he couldn’t remember one sentence their teacher said. He looked down at his own blank paper and chuckled, he hadn’t realized how out of touch he had really been.
“Mr. Halstead, did you find something more important to do than paying attention in my class?” Their teacher, Mr. Chavez asked as he stared him down.
Jay was about to respond with a “yes” but Hailey beat him to it, “He has a headache sir, I told him he could copy my notes later.” She explained.
“That’s very kind of you Ms. Upton. Great work as always.” He looked to Jay, his smile faltering. “See to it that you get those notes, don’t throw away Ms. Upton’s kindness.”
Jay nodded his head, stifling a laugh as he walked away. He gathered his things, preparing for the bell to ring and Hailey smirked beside him. “The next time you want to stare at me for an hour and a half, pick a class you aren’t close to failing.”
As soon as she finished her sentence, the bell rang and Hailey jumped up. “Hey! I’m not failing.” He called after her, but she just threw a grin over her shoulder at him and exited the room. Jay shook his head and grabbed his backpack, pulling the strap over his shoulder. That girl was going to be the death of him.
He made his way to his next class, Advanced Physics, which he unfortunately didn’t have with Hailey. He felt a little pathetic if he was being honest, but his happiness at the moment completely revolved around her. When she was around, the air felt a little lighter and he could breathe easier.
It was crazy to think that something so good came out of all of the shit they were dealing with, but it did. Hailey Anne Upton was his best friend, what more could he ask for?
…
Hailey sat in Psychology next to Severide, keeping her eyes locked on Kevin who turned around every five seconds to check on her. It was hard and she spent the whole class a little on edge, but they couldn’t risk Severide knowing that they were onto him in any way. Which meant Hailey had to spend 90 minutes every other day pretending to be his friend.
“How are you doing?” He asked, grabbing her attention.
Hailey looked back at him, startled. “I’m good, thanks.”
Severide nodded, glancing back down at her paper. “Uh, do you have number seven?”
“Yeah, it’s cognitive.” She said, looking at her own.
“Thanks.”
Hailey grimaced at the awkwardness of their conversation. “No problem.” She needed to get out of there. She raised her hand, “Can I use the restroom?” Her teacher nodded and she jumped up and grabbed the hall pass before high tailing it out of the room.
She let out a breath as she entered the bathroom, taking in her disheveled appearance. She hated how riled up Severide made her, but everytime she looked in the mirror she pictured the bruises that once covered her neck.
A toilet flushed behind her and she quickly got herself together. She gleaned in the mirror to see Nadia exit the stall, they made eye contact and quickly looked away. Hailey’s second uncomfortable interaction of the day. “Hailey right?” Nadia asked.
“Yeah.” Hailey said, she patted her legs nervously and gave her a small smile. “We haven’t officially met.”
Nadia gave her a cautious smile, “No we haven’t, but I don’t doubt you know everything there is to know about me.” Her tone turned darker at the end, her facade giving out.
“I’m not one to judge.” Hailey said, hoping to give her some solace.
“I’m not either.” Nadia turned towards the door, “Be careful with Jay, he’s not all he’s cracked up to be.”
“We’re just-” The door slammed shut, leaving Hailey alone to her thoughts, “Friends…” Not that she would be opposed to something more, but she wasn’t sure that was a secret. She ignored Nadia’s jab at Jay, if Hailey was her she would have said the exact same thing. Nadia didn’t know that Jay only ruined her because his mom’s life was at risk.
She grabbed the hall pass off the sink and made her way back to class, against her will. She was ready for the day to be over and she was barely halfway through.
…
After school, Hailey stood at her locker waiting for Jay, something else that had become normal. She was scrolling through instagram, not paying attention to anything going on around her. She was trying to keep her mind off the amount of AP Chem homework she had,but the tactic was proving to be unsuccessful.
“Hey,” a voice said, pulling her out of her trance. She looked up to find Kelly Severide standing over her, and she practically jumped out of her skin. “Sorry, I didn’t mean to scare you.”
Hailey laughed nervously, removing herself from between him and the locker. “You’re good, what’s up?”
“Uh, nothing really I was just wondering if maybe you would want to go to homecoming with me?” He asked and Hailey stared at him blankly.
She figured she was going to be asked, but not like that and certainly not by him. She stood there in silence, trying to figure out what to say. She was 100% sure that she had watched this movie and the probability of her ending up dead at the end of it was high. Who else could say that the guy who choked them in the middle of their living room at one in the morning was also their homecoming date? Not many, probably because everyone who could check yes for that box was either murdered or missing.
She was about to respond when she felt a presence behind her. “Sorry man, she can’t go with you.”
Hailey sighed, Jay.
Severide gave Jay a bored look, sighing. “Why’s that?” Hailey looked up at him as if to ask: Yeah Jay, why not?
Jay smirked, glancing down at Hailey and the to Severide, “Because she’s going with me.”
...
@lissethsrojas @fuckyeahkillianemma @puckluck28 @chilly7188 @thebigapocalypsewolf @karihighman @upsteadheart @ruzek-halstead
#jay halstead#hailey upton#upstead#upstead au#kim burgess#adam ruzek#burzek#burzek au#kelly severide#chicago pd#chicago pd au#one chicago#chicago fire#high school au
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Daminette arranged mariage au part 7
**************************
Damian arrived right on time as usual, to pick Marinette up for dinner. In the car they went over the plan one last time.
"So the plan right now is just to tell your brothers that we are dating until the papers go through confirming you are Xander's father, right?" Marinette said watching the city fly by.
"It shouldn't take long." Damien replied, "Rich families tend to get things done faster then anyone else. Everything should be in order before the end of dinner."
"But what about when they start asking questions?"
"We avoid the questions until the paperwork goes through, then we can tell them the whole story." He Paused thinking back. "When I got back I didn't talk about what happened. I didn't tell anyone so they should be interested enough in the story to leave their questions till the end."
"This might not go well dames," Marinette started Fidgeting with her bracelet, "what if they don't like me? Or they think I'm helping your mother? Or what if-"
"No, mari." He said, his voice bringing her away from her anxious thoughts, "it will be fine. i promise. they will love you and once we explain, everything will be fine. We are here are you ready?"
She nodded and stepped out of the car. The manor was even more extravagant then she had imagined. She was going to need to come back to sckech just the doorway not to mention the rest of the house. Thinking about the architecture helped to calm her nerves.
"Here we go" she said stepping up to the door. It opened before dhe even had the chance to knock. Behind the door was an elderly man in a suite.
"Hello Ms my name is Alfred, I am the Wayne's butler and your name is?"
"Just call me marinette.”
“I must insist it wouldn't be proper to call you anything but your last name.” Alfred said.
“Just marinette for now but you will probably know my last name by the end of the night.” he looked at her curiously, why didn’t she want him to know her name yet?
“Very well ms marinette,” he said before turning to damian, “master damian your family is waiting for you in The sitting room.”
the two of them walked into the room and marinette was expecting a lot of things, but not this. damian just looked so done with his family.
“Ahem.”he said drawing attention to himself. “Marinette these are my brothers Dick is the one hanging from the chandelier” she waved at the familiar man. “Tim is the one drinking straight from the pot of coffee and Jason is the one throwing knifes at Dick. Oh and cass is the only normal one sitting on the couch.”
“Hey!” the boys all yelled in unison.
“Its a pleasure to see you again marinette.” bruse said before the boys could start arguing “I presume that our other guest will be here after dinner?”
“That is correct Mr Wayne.”
“Its Bruce as I have told you.”
marinette rooled her eyes smiling. She wasn't going to call him Bruce
“Hold on what other guest?” Jason said confused.
“Dinner is served.” alfrid said from the doorway as he lead the group out of the room.
“Damian wait!” Dick said reaching out for his little brother. Damian turned glancing at marinette who nodded.
“What do you want Grayson?” he siad eager to get back to marinette.
“I don't think you should be seeing marinette you know how dangerous our 'job' is and-”
“She can take care of herself” he cut his brother off turning to follow were the rest of the group had gone.
Dick grabbed Damian’s arm makeing him stay this was importent.“I'm sure she can but she has a 2 year old son who can't take care of himself and I don't think-”
“Richard.” that got his attention damian never called anyone by their first name.
“Yes?”
“Xander is my son.” that took a moment to Process before-
“WHAT! WHAT DO YOU MEAN HE IS YOUR SON!”
without answering Damian walked out of the room. Dick folowed him into the dining room, where evryone looked at the two.
“Dick whats wrong? we heard yelling and you look like you saw a ghost.” Cass said conserned.
“Its nothing,” Damian replied sharing a meningful look with marinette. “I'm sure Grayson is fine. so marinette do I need to take any of my brothers to the garden”
evryone looked shocked at the implicashons but marinette just giggled.
“No they have all been wonderful. besids you know i can handle your brothers.”she smiled.
“Listen, marinette, if damian kidnapped you blink twice.” jason said in a sereous tone.
she gigaled again, “He didn't kidnap me besides we both know I can beat damian in a fight.”
“take that back! i have beaten you plenty of times before.” this made the boys and cass very intrested, if damian was defending himself he must have actualy tried to beat her, and falled.
“Dames I beat you 68% of the time.” interesting.
“so you admit i have beaten you before!” he said triumfently.
“Yeah when I let you win.” damians mouth fell open in legitament showk. he looked over at his father, who nodded, before making a statment that would change this family forever.
“Marinette Anne dupan-chang al Ghul Wayne you take that back right this minute!”
the reactions were very mixed. Dick was shocked. not only did his baby brother have a child but it apered that he was marred. Jason didnt know what to think. he had begun to coneckt the dots, marinette had foud the father of her chiled, she then showed up with his brother and she had the same last name as him. $#*! Tim alerdy knew about all this from his reserch and cass decided to wait for an explanation.
“No.” marinette said scrunching up her noes playfully. "I refuse to take it back."
there was silence for a moment before Bruce spoke.
“Maybe we should continue this discussion in the sitting room”
“So would you like to explain why marinette has the same last name as you?” cass said once they reached the other room.
“Not really but-”
“dames be nice, we knew we were going to explain when we came here tonight. I'll text luka.”
.”Who's Luka?” Tim said, he hadn't read anythig about a ‘Luka’.
“Its a long story so let's start from the beginning,” marinette started.
“Three and a half years ago I was walking back to my family's house after hanging out at a friend's house. Before I got home I saw a man who needed help, so I went over to help. him i cant remember what he was doing but when I got there I felt a prick in the back of my neck. I pulled the dart out before I hit the ground. The next thing I knew I was in a room laying on a coute. the door was locked and I could hear yelling from someone else in the building. I could tell it was a man but I couldn't make out what he was saying. it wasn't in french I later found out he was speaking Arabic. After the yelling stopped i heard the door unlock and got ready to run but when the door opened a woman was standing there with two big men behind her. She walked in and because of the two men I couldn't run. She started speaking to me in french she said 'my name it Talia. I need you to put on this ceremonial dress.' To which I replied as any sane person would that I wasn't going to put on the dress and they needed to take me back home. She asked 'did you hear that man yelling a moment ago?' 'Yes?' I said though I wasn't sure what that had to do with anything. 'if you don't put it on and do what I say I will kill him.' So I put on the dress. They tied my hands behind my back and blindfolded me before leading me out of the cell I was in. When they took the blindfold off I was kneeling at an alter. Talia began speaking in french so I could understand. She was saying things about the strongest bond known to man, and a queen for the future king. I didn't understand what she meant until I turned to see a boy my age bound and kneeling next to me. Thats when it hit me we were getting married. She made us drink something from a chalice before we were ushered into a different room. We were both untied and left alone. the door locked behind us. The only thing in the room was a bed. The boy introduced himself as damian and said that he wasn't sure why his mother made us get married but that he was going to get some answers. He looked pretty cute when he said that.”
Damian blushed at her compliment.
“Anyway Talia's explanation was that damian was 16 and for the league that meant he was a man and had to get married. And I had the great honor to be the one he married. I, was pissed. She said that as such a powerful magic user i was worthy to marry the future king of the league of assassins. I was even more pissed. She had the audacity to say that getting married, AT 16, to someone you had never met was a good thing. That little-”
“Alright mari I'll take over.” Damian said resting a hand on her sholder. “Anyway she said that after a year of mari training with the league we could go back to our normal lifes until we turned 18, at which point if we didn't at least move in together they would kill one of us. best mom ever. After that we were left alone to talk. Every day we trained and talked and worked hard. Once a month they would move us to a different compound and give us a huge array of blood tests. We became good friends. it was us against everyone else. Since we were already married we decided to give this whole romantic thing a try. But after six months I was sent to meeting with Talia she said I was going home and knocked me out sending me back to you. I searched and searched but I couldn't find any sign of marinette. so I had to asume Talia killed her. I couldn't think about France without thinking about her so I blocked all news from France. I didn't say anything to anyone for a month. And evrey year for one day I couldn’t speak, the anniversary of the last day I saw her alive.”
“I wasn't dead incase you were wondering.” marinette said picking up where damian left off,” I was sent to the med bay. No one would tell me what was happening or were damian was until Talia came in and said damian had fulfilled his usefulness. she exsplaned The only reason i was there was because damian had spent to much time with his father and had gone soft. The league needed a new heir to the throne. They picked me to be the mother of that heir. I was stuck there for months. I knew they weren't going to let me go. After the baby was born they were going to kill me. One day something big happened, I don't know what but it was big enough no one was watching me. I escaped. I hiched rides to France and snuck across borders. When I finally got back i saw a doctor as soon as I could. I didn't know if the baby was ok. He was born when I was 17.” she turned to the door where a young man stood holdng a toddler who scrambled down and ran over to his parints. “Everyone I would like you to meet Xander Thomas dupan-chang al Ghul Wayne.”
“Damian you have a son.” cass said wide eyed.
“I'm aware” damian said handing the boy his phone with a game already opened up.
“Xander is my nephew??????” Dick said staring at the boy like he had grown a secend head.
“Yes.” marinette said simply.” It took a year to defeat Paris' villain. After that I moved here to find damian and tell him about Xander.”
“Dang. So you know about Robin then?”
“Yep”
“Why didn't you say anything??? I've known you for over a year and you said nothing????” the betrayed jason said.
“I didn't want to explain anything until I could tell damian. i thought He should be the first to know about his son.”
“We have a break in at gatham museum.” alfered said over the intorcom
“We are not done with this conversation.” Bruce said.
“Suite up!” called Tim.
“Marinette do you want to come?”
she smiled at her husband “I wouldn't miss it for the world.”
************
I'm pretty sure this is the longest chapter I've ever written yay me. Pro tip if you see a centipede in your house DON'T TUCH IT it can and will sting you and it will hurt, my little brother just got stung by one. Anyway im glad so many of you like this story thanks for all the love! If you want to be tagged please let me know you can ether message me or reply to this. And if anyone can explain how to link things the pretty way with just "here" underlined that would be great. if you asked to be tagged and you weren't then ask again and ill put you on the list.
@thestressmademedoit
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#arranged marriage au#batfam#damian wayne#damien#maridami#marinette cheng#marinette x damian#miraculous marinette#maribat#marriage#marinette x damian happy#daminette
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Staying Hidden
BAU x OC Aundreya
Masterlist | Series Masterlist
Summary: Aundreya reveals everything that has been going on, and visits some of the team members in the hospital while trying to evade notice. Story eighteen.
Category: Angst.
Warnings: Cussing. Brief mention of sexual assault, drug use, and death.
Word Count: 4.8k
A/N: I still know nothing about how gangs work, this is all for entertainment purposes.
I have some explaining to do.
My given name from birth was Clara Spade. If you recall, I grew up with divorced parents and a sorry excuse for a father. When I was 14, I witnessed a mass killing by one of the most infamous serial killers of all time, the Storefront Slaughterer. Somehow, I was spared, but my identity was soon leaked to the media, and my mom, sister, and I were put in witness protection. At this point, my identity was changed along with my name, which was now Cassy Sae. I don’t know how, and I never figured out when the Slaughterer caught wind of my whereabouts, but he did, and he followed me home one night. He burnt my entire home down, taking the remaining two members of my family with it. I jumped out of the back window, barely surviving until Agent Gideon found me and took me back to his isolated cabin house in practically the middle of nowhere. As the news reported, Cassy Sae died in that fire as well, the same day Aundreya Chambers came into existence already at the age of 15. I attempted to go back to school, live as close to a healthy and normal life as I could, but I let my rage get the best of me. I decided that I wanted to hunt down the man that took everything from me, dropping out of high school. I left Gideon, telling him that I couldn’t burden him anymore and had to do whatever came next for me on my own. He reluctantly let me leave, and I found myself on the streets of Chicago. There, in a small self defense gym I’d started frequenting after hours, I met a girl only a few years my senior named Xena. She befriended me and admired how quickly I was picking up on all of the concepts being taught, despite the fact that I never officially took a class, only watched thinking I was going unseen. Xena told me about a group of people who could help and protect me, and before I knew it, I was meeting a man in his early 50s who went by the name of Rafael. Little did I know that I had just been coaxed into joining one of the most feared and revered gangs in the northeast.
One of the first things I learned was how to make money in the form of dancing. It was also when I created the Alionth persona. I was one of the youngest members to have ever joined the Cloaks (I was almost 16 at the time but it was an unspoken agreement that I was now 18), and I picked up on most everything very quickly. I started out low in the ranks, mainly just dancing and drawing new members in or being a distraction while another operation was going on behind the scenes. At one point, I remember that an operation wasn’t going as planned and they needed information from a patron at the club. I wanted to help out and be a part of the ‘more important things’ so badly, that I took initiative without permission. I started performing for the patron, and pick-pocketed him in the midst of it. I returned to Xena, and another boy, with the information I’d gathered from his phone and wallet. It helped them complete their operation, and they were impressed with my skills, even though they were irritated I did it without permission. After that night, I started moving up the ranks. It was also that night that the boy I’d met earlier with Xena started using me. His name is Jamar, but most people know him by his last name, DeLeon. He was the 19 year old son of another revered gang leader. Rafael happened to be close friends with his father, and agreed to look after DeLeon after he died. Rafael also took in the members of that gang, which helped spike the power and ‘popularity’ (for lack of a better word) of the Cloaks. DeLeon and his rowdy friends were hard to control, so in order to appease them, Rafael essentially let them do whatever they wanted, as long as it didn’t hurt the Cloak name. The ‘Cloak name’ did not explicitly include Cloak members.
I was fresh, and had skills that apparently made me ‘special,’ so DeLeon and his boys decided I would be a great way to celebrate the success of that night. And ‘come on, you’re half the reason it went so well. Don’t you want to celebrate with us?’ This was also my first exposure to hard drugs. I was on and off them from here on out.
But beyond that, once I started to be recognized for my pick-pocketing abilities, and being able to track people down for information, I got moved to be a private informant for the gang, and I was damn good at it too. I spent the most time communicating my findings with Xena and DeLeon, so they became the closest people to me. In all of my free time, I looked for the Slaughterer. When I finally found him and asked Xena and DeLeon to help me set up a trap for him, they helped me without hesitation. It was my idea to tip off the FBI, which they were obviously hesitant about at first. But I convinced them that if we caught one of the FBI’s most wanted, and instead of hurting him turned him over to the FBI, it would make us look better to them and hopefully keep them off our asses. We discussed it with Rafael himself, and he thought that it was a good idea. I was surprised and relieved, and once the FBI had the Slaughterer in custody and everything went according to plan, it was enough to get me moved up to the rank of ‘Head of the PI unit.’ That’s when I started being known as The Figure. I was 18 at the time, and for a while I seemed untouchable. I was training other members, three of which were Sydney, Deen, and Corbyn, my three closest friends going into the ring, and we were finding people left and right. I scoped out traitors and infiltrators as a part of my lead job (that’s when I met Christina who was working with Derek at the time), and the gang seemed to be as strong as ever.
Then, one day, I found out that Xena Adaland is the granddaughter of Rafael Adaland, the gang’s leader. She, like DeLeon, was three years older than me, and was pissed that I was now higher in the ranks than she was. She challenged me for my PI spot, and the rules were simple. Whoever lost, would leave.
The day before the challenge, which would be a series of fighting, investigating, and persuasive tactics, Rafael came to me and told me that I had to win, no matter what it took. I was stunned, and even though I pushed for more information, he wouldn’t tell me why. Regardless, I did win, and Xena was forced to leave, and her grandfather let her. No, not just let her, he encouraged her. Once she left, I essentially became the replacement daughter to Rafael, which meant I was in even closer contact with DeLeon. Our relationship had always been very twisted, but once I was under more direct protection by Rafael, he almost completely stopped how he’d been treating me. Almost. I didn’t understand how fucked up it was at the time, but we even started dating once he started treating me better. However, there were bigger problems. The FBI was closing in on us, which I later found out was the reason why Rafael was okay letting Xena leave. He wanted her safe and away from this mess when it imploded. Rafael and I had been working closely side by side for a year now, and I could tell he was feeling like he had nothing left. Xena was gone, his life’s work of building a foolproof gang was collapsing, and DeLeon was slowly pulling away. He and I both knew that the FBI and police were looking for someone to blame, someone to go down for this, and only one of us was going to get out of this whole thing. He all but told me I had his blessing to screw him over and take the gang for myself. I was 19 and he was almost 60, so he knew that the one thing he might be able to leave was a legacy, one that I might be strong enough and smart enough to carry on. What he did tell me, was that what he was about to do was for me and for the rest of the gang, and that it would take the heat off of us, long enough for us to preserve what was left of the gang. For a while, I thought that he would be turning it over to Xena or DeLeon, but when it came down to it, it was me that he chose. I took it in stride and with honor.
That night, when Rafael ended up dead in his office, I fully understood what he was talking about before. If the FBI found the gang’s leader dead, they would have someone to blame, and the spotlight would no longer be on me or really any of the rest of the members. The gang would essentially collapse.
DeLeon had different ideas, though. He thought that I had killed Rafael, the closest thing to a dad he could remember, and was out for revenge. He returned to his old ways of treating me, and left me with a scar to prove it. I fought through all of that shit, knowing I still had a responsibility to protect and salvage the gang. I had to tell them to disperse and find me in a month or so when things had cooled down. I pushed the gang underground, and that was the start of the ring. Whoever could find me again would have passed the first test to see if they were worthy or not to be in my new ring.
Deen found me first, then Sydney, then Corbyn. Others came to me as well, either from the gang or outside of it with other skills that were desirable. I started going by the name Alionth, and the former gang got turned into my ring of elite criminals. I ran a tight ship underground until I was 21.
Xena had been marinating in anger since she lost to me, and decided to get back at me by hurting one of my best friends. She kidnapped Sydney while on a job, and threatened to hurt her if I didn’t show up. It had only been days prior that I met Sydney’s husband Todd and her newborn daughter, Jayana, who I ran into again on my second case with the team. I should have known it was a trap from the beginning, but I’d been getting cocky and wasn’t exactly thinking straight, due to the amount of drugs pumping through my system.
I showed up and was ambushed by both Xena and DeLeon, who explained to me that they’d found each other again after the Cloaks crashed. They bonded over their mutual hate for me, and decided to fuck me over together. They killed Sydney right in front of me, and then left just in time for the FBI to capture me and throw me in prison. If you remember, I was in there for four years from 21 to 24, and then I escaped. I ran right back to my ring, which accepted me with open arms. I was laying low for a while, and decided I’d let things cool off before taking the lead again. Before I could do that, though, I received an interesting visitor.
Agent Howard Archer came to visit me, and he wasn’t there to arrest me. He was there to hire me. He told me about the BAU and a certain unit chief he was not a fan of. He was just a step higher than Aaron Hotchner, and did not like the way he was running the BAU. Not to mention, Hotch was a threat to Archer’s position, and there was a potential competition between the two for the vice-presidency if something were to happen to the vice president. Archer wanted to ensure his future spot, and needed Hotch, and the VP, out of the way. He later informed me that another reason he had such a strong distaste for Aaron was because he failed to solve a case involving the murder of Archer’s son. I asked if he had a preferred way to get two FBI agents out of his way, and he told me he was familiar with my work and was prepared for whatever consequences followed. In other words, he would be satisfied with me killing the vice-president, and pinning it on Hotch.
He had me from the moment he introduced himself as an agent.
I went in to meet the team, which did not go as well as planned. Either way, I agreed to help Archer, and privately investigated each member after that first day. I knew Hotch from my past when I was still in contact with Gideon, but I didn’t think it would be as hard as it was. I thought that I could just come in, get the job done, and then move out. The problem was that there was an odd sense of loyalty to this man I’d met only a few times. It was odd, how he seemed to respect me, and he was even the first person (outside of Gideon and the people I worked with on the streets) that actually accepted my skills. I was one of the ‘bad guys’ from prison, but he always seemed to have some sort of appreciation for my information and willingness to work with him. There was just something about him that was calming, and each day I spent with the team, the harder it became for me to follow through. Aaron Hotchner was a natural born leader, and he was phenomenal at his job. Not to mention that the rest of the team, the rest of his family, really did care about him. I started questioning if I’d be able to tear apart this family, especially when I didn’t agree with Archer at all. Archer claimed that Hotch didn’t run the BAU well, but after spending time under his leadership, I totally disagreed. I also started building connections with people who weren’t obligated or pressured to like me like basically everyone else in my life. They made me feel better about myself, about my abilities, and I realized there was a constructive way in which I could use them. They unknowingly convinced me that I didn’t have to stay on the path of destruction I’d been on for my whole life, and that I could actually make something of myself, something that I didn’t hate. Something I could wake up every morning to and look in the mirror and not hate who was looking back at me or what she was doing everyday.
So I didn’t want to leave. I didn’t want to follow through with what I had agreed to do. Archer was persistent, though. He checked in on my progress, and at first I told him it would take time, which it would. But by the end of the three years I’d spent with the team, my excuses were just becoming lame. Not to say that the events that followed were lucky, because the whole Spencer and me going to prison thing was not lucky, but it gave me a legitimate excuse as to why I wasn’t working towards ‘the goal.’ It also gave him an excuse to come and threaten me while in prison. I didn’t know how I was going to get out of my deal with Archer, all I knew was that I had to. I was not going to tear that family apart, despite the fact that I already seemed to be doing that all on my own. But if they could survive the tornado that was me and my past, they deserved to be left alone after that.
Yet, I could tell that Archer had become restless, and the moment he mentioned going to someone else to get the job done if I couldn’t, I knew. He was the first one that really cemented my theory of Xena and DeLeon being back, but it was worse than I thought. He was working with them. Probably to do my job and kill me in the process, considering I knew his plans and could easily expose him, effectively wrecking everything. Unfortunately, he had no idea who he’d just gotten involved with, especially now that they were working as a team, and Archer was way too cocky and way too stupid to heed any of my warnings and assurances.
I had bigger problems at the moment, though. I always seem to.
Xena and DeLeon were back, and they were back with a vengeance. I knew that they had to be behind everything that had gone wrong. Some runner finding Maeve even before Spencer could, my father finding me and making weird comments like he knew what I had been up to, Spencer’s frame job and going to prison, and then of course, the detectives finding Spencer and I at my motel. I knew Xena had cameras in that room, and I saw her outside of the building as I was being shoved into the police car. I even wondered if they were behind the kidnapping of Derek’s cousin and Maeve. The three of us learned from the same person, and I was worried I wouldn’t be able to match, hell overcome, the two of their minds working together. I was worried that I wouldn’t be able to work both angles at the same time: stopping Xena and DeLeon from afar and Agent Archer from all too close. But honestly, it didn’t really matter, because I had to find and stop them before they could wreck anything else, no matter what it cost me.
So I left the hospital leaving only that simple note behind; my unofficial resignation from the BAU. If I went off the grid, Xena and DeLeon would have to spend all of their time chasing me, and would have no time to spare for messing with the team. At least, that’s what I hoped.
# # # # # # # # # # # # #
I was successful at staying hidden for about four months. While Xena and DeLeon hopefully didn’t have enough time or energy to keep tabs on the team, that didn’t mean I didn’t. I kept up with every case of theirs, and even left their main suspect tied to a chair in his living room one time as a sort of gift since he kept evading them. You know, since I was conveniently in the area at the time.
When I heard about the explosion, I rushed back to DC from some small town in Georgia. I’d been spending time in all different states and towns, hoping it would be enough to keep those urchins on my tail while I figured out a way to trap them. But this seemed more important, especially because there was a chance that whatever explosion hurt them could have been planted by Xena and DeLeon. I couldn’t be sure of anything regarding their involvement anymore.
I showed up to the hospital after hours, and stood outside the three adjacent rooms housing Derek, Aaron, and JJ. All three were hooked up to a plethora of machines, and were out cold. I just stood there watching them, convincing myself that this wasn’t somehow my fault with each steady beep of their monitors. The hospital was almost peaceful like this, which was odd for me to admit considering how much I hated them.
I don’t know how long I’d been standing there when I heard faint footsteps approaching from behind me. I whipped my head around to face the noise, but when I scanned the hallway behind me, there was no one there. You are getting really paranoid.
But I figured that’s what was keeping me alive, so I just rolled my eyes and moved on. I allowed myself only a few more minutes for now, making sure that the three of them were still alive before heading out.
I came back a couple days later to check on them again. I again did it in the middle of the night, so all three were in essentially the same state, but a bit more color had returned to their faces. I moved a couple paces over and leaned against the wall behind me. I shut my eyes for only a little bit, and when I opened them, I spotted her. Emily was sitting down in the chair in JJ’s room, her full focus and attention on the woman in front of her. I was in a corner of the mini lobby outside of their rooms, and by the looks of it, she hadn’t noticed I was there. My heart was racing as I attempted to slip by her room and out of the hospital. I had almost completely cleared the room when Emily made eye contact with me. It was for a split second, but it was enough for her to recognize me. I didn’t wait to see what happened, because I started a full on sprint out of the hospital.
I decided that I couldn’t go back there; it made me too careless. I was absolutely defenseless and in a weakened state of mind. It was too risky, for me and them alike. Staying hidden until I could figure a way out of this was my only option.
# # # # # # # # # # # # #
The whole team had been shook by three of their members getting hurt in an explosion. They were all relieved that Derek, Hotch, and JJ were alive and that no serious damage had come to them. After closing the case Rossi and Preniss decided to be the ones that stayed with them, especially overnight. Penelope had stayed with them for four days straight while the rest of the team finished the case, so she deserved to be relieved of duty for a while, Tara got called to do more inmate interviews for research, and Reid just overall needed sleep. He’d been trying to figure out what Aundreya had meant by her note, where she was now, and what she was doing in all of his free time, including the midnight hours. Of course, everyone wanted to know more about these Xena and DeLeon characters, but even Garcia couldn’t find anything on them. Whatever was going on, there wasn’t really anything they could do about it. Reid knew this, but refused to give up. He finally agreed to go home, get some rest, and spend time with Maeve after some heavy convincing from Rossi and Prentiss. Which just left the two of them to be there together, or take shifts. A few days into it, Prenitss called Rossi in a minorly confused state.
“Sorry, I hope I didn’t wake you,” Emily started.
“I’m actually only a few minutes from the hospital, so that’s not a problem. What’s going on?” Rossi for the most part sounded calm, but Emily’s profiler ears could hear the slight concern behind them.
“Don’t worry, nothing’s wrong they’re all doing fine,” Emily started, and she heard a small sigh on the other end of the phone, “It’s just that, um…” Now that she was thinking about it, she wasn’t sure if she should tell anyone about Aundreya or not. Emily knew that whatever she was going through was very personal, and she probably didn’t intend on being seen, let alone having word get to the entire team. Plus, it probably wouldn’t benefit every member to know that she was around, but wouldn’t tell them what’s going on…
“What is it Emily?” Rossi questioned.
“I think… I think I just saw Aundreya. Here, in the hospital,” Emily answered. She wasn’t completely sure what to do with the information, and her and Rossi had always had a good relationship. He had this soothing, sturdy, knowledgeable vibe about him, and figured if she should tell anyone about this, it would be him. She also knew that Aundreya had trusted him, opening up about things she really hadn’t told anyone else, so it felt less violating to tell him.
“Hold on, I’m almost there,” was all Rossi offered before hanging up. It wasn’t exactly the reaction she’d been expecting.
When Rossi met her in the small lobby on that floor, he jumped right in with, “Yeah, I’ve seen her too.”
Emily’s eyes widened just slightly, but it didn’t really shock her either that he’d spotted her first. It just sort of made sense that he would. He always was better at keeping things a bit more compartmentalized and aware of his surroundings. Granted, Emily was pretty good at that herself, but when it came to her other team members, she could get a little clouded. “What should we do? Do we do anything?”
“I don’t think so. I’m not sure it would do any good, and she seems like she wants to handle this on her own,” Rossi replied.
“Whatever this is,” Emily pointed out. Rossi nodded, and after a few minutes, she added, “Is this what it was like when I was gone?”
Rossi turned to face her head on, “If you really want to know, yes. Except, we thought you were dead.” Not like we know for sure Aundreya isn’t, he thought, at least not yet.
“I’m so sorry for putting you all through that. It really sucks being on the other end of this. Not like the alternative is better…” Emily trailed off.
“You did what you had to do, and I’m sure Chambers is doing the same,” Rossi said with a small smile, “even if that means spending a few nights at my place.”
Emily looked over at him, mouth agape, “What? Are you serious?”
Rossi nodded. “I didn’t put it together until I saw her here a few days ago. I went home and just had this feeling that I wasn’t alone, and had heard a sound during the nights prior. I looked around my house and saw that one of the beds wasn’t made exactly like it had been for all the years I’ve lived there, and the window made the same squeaking sound I’d been hearing. I’ve tried to pay attention to when she’s there, but it’s very infrequent.”
“Probably random if she’s trying to fall off the radar,” Emily added.
A few more moments of silence passed before Rossi asked, “What would you do?”
“What do you mean?”
“Her situation is somewhat similar to yours. If you were her, what would you be doing right now?”
It wasn’t a bad thought. They put themselves in the shoes of the unsubs all the time, why not use the same technique here? “Uh, well, I’d be trying to go underground right about now. She’s clearly running from someone, or multiple someones, which are probably those other two names on her list.” Emily thought a bit more and continued, “When it was me, I wasn’t only running from Doyle, but I was also running to Declyn. If she’s running from those two people, what or who is she running to?”
“That is a very good question,” Rossi agreed. They both pondered this for a little while longer before taking a break, realizing they weren’t going to come with the answer tonight, and definitely not at a hospital where three of their friends were staying.
“Are we sure we aren’t going to tell anyone?” Emily sounded concerned.
“I don’t think that will help. And there are people who I don’t think need to know this,” Rossi said with a knowing look, “But, if we get any more information, or just happen upon evidence that points towards her needing our help, along with something we can actually do about it, then maybe we will. But until then, I think you and I should keep this to ourselves.” Emily nodded and the pair remained in silence for the rest of the night, mulling over the next moves they’d make and next questions they’d ask tomorrow, hoping they’d be enough to make a difference.
Series Taglist (open)
@justanothetfangirl @kris-stuff @blameitonthenight21 @wooya1224 @unded-bride @swiftingday @dezzxmx
#criminal minds fanfic#aundreya chambers#bau x oc#spencer x oc#criminal minds fandom#criminal minds#cm#criminal minds fanfiction#bau#behavioral analysis unit#emily prentiss#prentiss#david rossi#rossi#aaron hotchner#hotch#reid#morgan#garcia#jareau#lewis
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Gravity Falls Beyond the Woods Chapter Three
Almost year long hiatus? What almost year long hiatus?
Dipper and Wendy’s daughter prepare for a big day when Wendy gets some news.
Rated T for blood and violence
<-prev next->
The bell rang and the students got and left their sixth grade class for the summer. Two students stood out due to their red hair and height. The two twins were only 12 but could easily pass for 16. Ty and Rose stood a foot above the rest of their peers. Rose was very excited for the summer. Summer meant adventure. Summer meant mystery!
She had grown up listening to stories about her Dad and Aunt Mabel fighting gnomes and solving the mystery of the journals. Now on her twelfth summer, maybe it was her turn. But before that she had other business.
“Mom coming in twenty minutes, I’ll be outside shooting hoops.” Tyrone was much more popular than Rose. While height had made her a bit of a paria among peers outside her friend group, it had made Ty very popular. Star basketball player, big hit with the other boys in school. He has had the gall to have dated several of them all while Rose had never even kissed a boy.
Rose made her way to her locker, where she was greeted by her friends, Grace and Megan. Grace was African-American while Megan was latina. Both were of average height with their classmates, which means they were far shorter than Rose.
“You’re ready for tomorrow?” Grace asked.
“Ah, about as ready as one can be.”
“Come on Rose, we know that you can do it,” Megan said encouragely. Did ya bring the sword?”
Rose blew a raspberry. “The school wouldn’t let me bring it. It’s so stupid. It’s not even sharp.” Tyrone may have the court, but Rose has fencing.
Across the country, a teacher was saying goodbye to her class. Mabel strolled down the classroom, passing rows of kindergarteners. “It’s been a wonderful year, children, I’ll miss you all so much.”
“We’ll miss you too Mrs. Pines-Northwest!” The kids got out of their chairs and rushed over to hug the crying teacher.
After class, Mabel cleaned her face in the bathroom. Damn, saying goodbye was the hardest part of being a teacher. After washing up, she walked out to her sports car, a gift from her wife. The vehicle's black color stood out against the bright background of California wine country. She drove out of the suburbs and into the farmland, music blaring. She passed barns filled with cows, horses, and ostriches.
She reached the vineyards passing rows and rows of grapes. A smile broke out on her face when she saw her house sitting on the hill. She drove up to the gate and punched in the code. Driving up the road, she spotted her loving wife working in the field.
Pacifica was looking at the grapes. The former heiress wore overalls, coated with dirt. She had long stopped bleaching her hair, leaving it her natural dirty blonde. The long locks she wore as a child had been cut down to a pixie cut. The same style she had since college. After parking the car, Mabel got out and greeted Pacifica with a kiss.
“How was the last day of school?”
“Tough. It always is.” Mabel sighed. “Why do the kids move on to a new teacher every year!”
“Now, now. You’ll be just as attached to next year’s class.” Pacifica gave her a hug. “The kids are inside. I’m going to take a bath.”
“Bubble?”
“Of course.”
“Love you.”
As Mabel entered the house, her phone lit up. It was her twin. “Dipper what’s up!” She placed her puse on the kitchen counter.
“Doing alright after saying goodbye?”
“Yeah, how do you deal?”
“Well, I got college students so…”
Mabel blew a raspberry. “You got no soul Mr Pines.” At this moment Stanley walked in, Mabel and Pacifica’s son was five with dirty blonde hair. This was his last summer before he starts Kindergarten. “So, how’s Rosie? Is she excited for the big day tomorrow?”
Stan tugged on Mabel’s dress. “Mommy, I want a cookie.”
Mabel placed her hand over the speaker and turned her attention to her young son. “Mommy’s on the phone, go ask your mother.”
The young boy shrugged. He wandered over to the bathroom. He reached up and opened the door. The boy’s second mother was relaxing in a tub filled with bubbles. “Mom, can I have a cookie?”
Without opening her eyes she said, “Go ask your mother sweetie.”
Young Stan turned around and walked back to the kitchen. “Mommy can I have a cookie?”
“Any plans for the summer… hold on. Go ask your mother honey.”
Stan once again made the track to the bathroom. “Mom I really want a cookie. Can I have one?”
“Go ask your mother.” The blonde replied again.
The boy made his way back to the kitchen and asked, “Mommy can I have a cookie.”
“I told you to ask your mother!” Mabel said a little louder than she intended. If it bothered Stan, he didn’t show it. He just walked back to the bathroom, earning the attention of Ashley whose head peaked out of her room. She was a seventeen year old african-american girl who was Mabel and Pacifica’s foster daughter. She had been living with the Pines-Northwests for a year and a half. She was reading a robotic magazine when Mabel shouting drew her out of her head.
Stan walked into the bathroom asking, “Mom can I have a-”
“GO ASK YOUR MOTHER!”
Rose was standing in front of the school, waiting for both her brother and her mother to come. She wished that her father was coming to pick her up as Mom tended to be a bit.. embarrassing at times. But Dad was a busy important man. She could understand that he couldn’t pick her up everytime. Her thoughts were interrupted by a shrill voice.
“Hey daddy long legs, ready to embarrass yourself tomorrow?”
Rose sighed through her nose. “Hey Margaret,” Rose hissed at the popular mean girl.
Margaret was flanked by her two lackeys. “How much do you wanna bet she trips over her front feet?”
One of the girls next to her laughed, “Yeah, how’s the weather up there.”
Margaret exploded at her friend. “That’s not what we’re talking about Stacy! God, can't you think up something clever? Just shut up Stacy! Just shut up!” The mean girl pinched the bridge of her nose as she tried to calm herself down.
Rose could help but ask, “Are you okay?”
“I’m fine.”
“Are you sure?”
“I said I’m fine!”
The girls stood in front of the school unsure what to do now. The awkwardness hung in the air thick. A honk from a large fire truck pulled everyone out of their funk.
Wendy’s head popped out of the window. “Hey Rosie, Mom brought the fire truck.”
Margaret icily said, “Try not to rib off another locker door Mommy’s girl.” She stormed off, leaving her henchgirls to scramble after her.
Rose got in the fire truck, emotionally exhausted. Wendy picked up on something.
“Was that girl picking on you? Do you want me to punch her in her face?”
“Mom! You just can’t punch girls in their face. Can we just get home?”
“Where’s your brother?”
“Around the corner at the basketball court.”
As the Pines family settled in their apartment, Wendy heard her phone go ding. An email from her brother Marcus. They were having a Corduroy family reunion this summer, hosted by their father at Gravity Falls Organ. Great. She sent a reply confirming that she and her brood will attend. At least Rosie will be happy.
And her family wasn’t the only people still in Gravity Falls. She decided to call Tambry.
Tambry answered, “Wendy! How’s my favorite girl?”
“Seeing you soon actually. Can you talk?”
“Yeah, I’m not during anything. What’s up?”
“Dad’s hosting the next family reunion. So I’ll be in town in June.”
“Oof, hosting all those Corduroys sounds like an event.”
“Yeah, our family gathering can get pretty… pretty intense.”
“Too bad I’ll have to miss it. I’m traveling for work all June. In fact I’m in Chicago right now.”
“But didn’t you and Robbie like, just have a baby?”
“That was months ago.”
“Ah what do you do again.”
“I’m an associate statistician for cosmetic sales.”
“And what does that intel?”
“Oh it’s very technical. You properly wouldn’t understand.” Wendy rolled her eyes at that. “Well, I’ll tell Robbie that you and Dipper will be in town.”
Wendy heard gunshots over the phone. She pulled it away flinching. “Tambry are you okay?”
“Oh yeah. The asshole in the room next to mine is watching a movie and he has no idea how sound must work!” Wendy heard a few more gunshots and some sobbing. “I might as well be watching the damn thing myself.”
Tambry hung up the cell phone. Standing in her hotel room, she was wearing a simple suit and tie. What was really out of place was the pistol in her hand. A man knelt before her sobbing. His colleagues were corpses scattered throughout the room. Tambry wasn’t worried about being caught, the seedy motel they were in were far from prying eyes.
“Your country thanks you for your service.”
“Please,” the man croaked. “We did everything you asked…”
Tambry pulled the trigger, blowing his brain all over the room. She makes another call. “They’re dead. Send a clean up crew.”
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Core Character Ranking - No Straight Roads
At this point with the game having been out for well over four and a half months, I figure that with having a small piece of fiction under my belt, and with the fandom having cooled down from the initial release but still hot enough for content to steadily be coming out from the fanbase, now is a good time for me to share my thoughts on No Straight Roads - rather, what I call the Core Characters of No Straight Roads.
I call them this because they are the collective protagonist main characters and antagonistic bosses - not filling up one bucket or another quite satisfactory. I might even make this into a series if anyone cares enough to hear my thoughts on other pieces of fiction. If you’re interested, continue below the line.
Oh, also, spoilers for No Straight Roads if you still care about that.
Disclaimer before continuing onwards - I’ve never actually played No Straight Roads! I’m not exactly a person with enough wealth to throw at my own interests and hobbies, but I feel I’ve absorbed enough through culture osmosis, 100% walkthroughs of the game, and other people’s interpretations of the game to be able to make my own informed opinions on the characters.
Also, this isn’t a “bosses” ranking list - this is a character ranking list. Meaning that individuals are going to be ranked rather than the whole. For example, Sayu will be divided into the four members behind Sayu (hereafter refered to as “Team Sayu”) as well as Sayu herself. This also means I won’t fully go on the gameplay mechanics as I don’t have enough experience with it to make a fully informed decision. I will talk about what I’ve seen though.
With that in mind, we’ll be starting as all of these lists usually do, from the bottom ranking to the top: ________________________________________________________________ 20. Eve
Now, this may come as a shock, but I absolutely despise divas. Eve was entertaining enough, but through her videos she was only relatable and likable to me before she and Zuke broke up. Mostly because I could relate with her self-loathing and her found happiness.
Still... setting someone’s hair on fire? And then being confused as to why that happened? Then completely blaming the victim and using that mistake as fuel to shut out any other potential kindred relationship for the future? I’ve seen people who do that; it’s pathetic at best and annoying to see at worst. Thankfully, due to Zuke, she does eventually come around.
Her music and boss fight are interesting enough I suppose. I like how the perspective changes and I adore when you have to switch over to Mayday and it becomes a fully chaotic mess of limbs, doubt, hatred, and rage. I live for that chaotic aesthetic.
Otherwise, she’s just... the weakest character to me in No Straight Roads.
Maybe she’ll Eve-ntually earn my respect in supplementary materials. ________________________________________________________________ 19. Sofa
The first member of Team Sayu I’m mentioning and he’s this low on the list. Ouch. Not to say that I hate him, the hate started and ended with Eve - he, along with the others don’t really have much of a personality canonically that I can see to judge him on. But in terms of his design, I’ve never been much of a fan of “overweight and silly” outside of Doctor Eggman/
Do not take this the wrong way. I am in NO way fatshaming ANYONE.
I just have never liked that design in fictional characters. See Hifumi Yamada from “Danganronpa: Trigger Happy Havoc” for more on what I mean
Still, he’s a core member of Team Sayu and from the fanfiction I’ve read he’s one of the better characters to write with. Maybe if we got a spinoff or other related materials, he’d go up a few numbers in rank, but as it stands, he’s the weakest of the group.
Sofa-r so good, let’s move on before these puns go too far. ________________________________________________________________ 18. Mayday Yeah. I’m not a huge fan of Mayday herself. Hotheaded protagonists are fine here and there, but she’s so hot-headed I’m surprised that she didn’t have the fire aesthetic as well. I guess with it all being taken by Tatiana, they could only give her a warm color scheme so it wasn’t redundant.
Her gameplay seems fine, if a bit basic. The heavy hitter is also a hothead, who could guess. I kinda like how someone as scrawny and small as her also has the biggest heart and temper. Also the gags that come from her relating to the other bosses are hysterical and make for good protagonist material. Still, outside of her interaction with DK West, Zuke, and Team Sayu, as well as the very end of the game, there’s a lack of enough “heroic” traits that makes Mayday fall flat from just shy of ranking higher.
I don’t have a clever pun, joke, or one-liner for Mayday, so let’s go to the next person in my list. ________________________________________________________________ 17. DJ Subatomic Supernova I have never really liked disco or dance music at the best of times, but I love space. So what happens when you mix something I feel lukewarm to, something I absolutely adore, and combine it with a trait about a person I absolutely also despise?
You get space helmet man who likes fresh ice cream and goes on for minutes about how great he is and how everyone else around him are plebeians - not knowing how pretentious the stage name “Subatomic Supernova” is.
If I had made this list when I had first seen No Straight Roads, he’d be only just ahead of Eve just because I dislike her so much more than I hate egotism of DJ Subatomic Supernova. But he’s now gone higher on the list since he’s grown on me thanks to the fandom and me realizing the game is parodying the stereotypes and the industry of music. Also, Zuke’s drum solo is AMAZING with the EDM version of DJ SS’s theme. He’s even gone so far as to become half of my second favorite paring in the NSR fandom!
Shine on, you funky space man. ________________________________________________________________
16. DK West Ewah! Older of the two brothers by age, younger of the two by maturity. I absolutely love this goofball. His shadow powers are absolutely amazing to watch and while I normally don’t like rap outside of Eminem (and even then only select tracks), he grew on me a lot. He’s so unique and the culture he’s based on from what I understand was researched with a lot of respect and care.
I’ve heard (and seen) that the third fight ramps up the difficulty way too much, but considering that Mayday is attempting to repair a broken household, it makes sense it’d be such a heavy undertaking from a gameplay and story point.
Also DK West Encounter 1 is a smash hit, telling us everything we really need to know between DK West and Zuke while being an absolutely great song that reminds me of Epic Rap Battles of History for anyone that remembers that.
He overshadows his previous competition by a large margin, and I can’t wait to see more of him if that’s possible. ________________________________________________________________ 15. Yinu’s Mom As the real mastermind behind Yinu’s position in NSR, it suddenly makes so much sense as to why a literal child is in such a strict EDM hierarchy like NSR. What keeps her from going above and beyond this ranking isn’t anything more than just the pressure she puts on Yinu to perform. During the fight, and what I can only presume also happens outside of concerts in the universe of No Straight Roads, it seems like she entirely forgets the reason Yinu keeps playing the piano in the first place.
However, I am a huge sucker for family dynamics, and her stopping her assault due to the memories that Yinu was able to drag out of her through the broken piano by playing Heart of the Prodigy is enough to almost enough for me to reach the level of emotional catharsis as the ending of Pixar’s “Inside Out” did for me. And the way she shielded Yinu when they were falling, the gasp of fear that she might not survive the fall - just pure, amazing storytelling through “show, don’t tell”.
I will say, the more morbid part of me that enjoys things like Danganronpa, Your Turn To Die, and Nonary Games, had the thought of “if it weren’t for the fact that Mayday and Zuke also fell from that height and survived (and that this game is meant for younger audiences), Yinu would have became an orphan.”
Mother of the Year award goes to Yinu’s mom for being the most realistic, sympathetic, non-dead mom in fiction. ________________________________________________________________ 14. Yinu I love classical music, but I don’t really like children. Yinu is an exception to my general dislike of children. The promotion that was released before the game was a little eye-rolling, but it was also funny. Fortunately, in the game, Yinu is so much more mature and interesting than the promotional material lead us to believe. The way the piano plays plays in the base version of VS Yinu conveys just how talented she is at nine years old. It’s a shame that it slowly gets covered up by the EDM version as the battle goes on.
But her reasoning for playing the piano, through the photos you get from Yinu’s backstory is all the more reason to respect this literal child. She turned the loss of her music teacher and father into a shining passion for music. The piano being the very memento of her deceased dad - looking at the photos and then realizing what you did in shattering her piano creates a fantastic retroactive look at just how destructive Bunkbed Junction’s revolution really is to people.
We’re not even half-way down the list, and yet we already have great characters like this, so let’s keep looking. ________________________________________________________________ 13. Dodo There’s been a huge gap since the last Team Sayu member. So what makes Dodo so great compared to Sofa? Well, the deep voice that comes from the scrawny, blue man is funny to me. It caught me off-guard the first time I heard it and had me giggling for hours afterwards after I paused the video to regain my composure.
That, and mocap work is hard work. On top of that, though he’s mostly not the face everyone remembers when fans think of Sayu, it takes a lot of talent and self-confidence to dance like a cutesy mermaid despite being a male, at least in my opinion. So I see him as having high confidence, but also being like Zuke in the “chill and mostly quiet” department.
There’s not much else for me to say, since most of Team Sayu doesn’t have blatantly obvious character traits. So let’s move on. ________________________________________________________________ 12. Sayu Sayu herself is... well, not real. It’s like trying to judge any number of the Vocaloid/UTAU voice banks. Sure you can place any number of personalities and messages into it, but in reality she’s just been built as a “cutsie, wootsie, pink mermaid” idol.
Still, the personality that Team Sayu gives her is fantastic. Her fight is annoying, and lackluster even to watch, but her song is amazing in all of its forms, even if for me the vaporwave version is the least effective of all of them - and Analog Aquatics is the BEST lead-up song to it, even ahead of Heart of the Prodigy.
Hatsune Miku? Who’s that? I only see Sayu as the best Vocaloid. ________________________________________________________________ 11. Remi Technically the creator of Sayu in the first place and her designer, Remi seems to be the “all according to plan” type. To think that his passion for art would lead to a career such as NSR, and a close-knit friend group like Team Sayu. It’s something that I’m sure that every artist has had as their goal at one point or another.
I highly respect anyone with the ability to put their artwork out in public, both in real life and as a character. Even so, there are characters I like even beyond Remi, and once again, we don’t have much to go off of for him outside of the very few times we see him in Sayu’s battle.
Almost all of Team Sayu has been covered at this point - heck, even Sayu herself has already been covered. So where’s Tila you ask? Well, we’ll get to that, but not for a while. ________________________________________________________________ 10. Tatiana “Kul Fyra” Qwartz From the very moment we first hear her voice, we can tell she’s all business and order. When we watch all of NSR reject the rock music outright and listen to Tatiana’s speech afterwards? How she seems to disregard her artists own safety and prioritizing undermining Bunkbed Junction’s efforts just because she can’t bear to remember her old bandmates? Wonderfully selfish for a heartbroken character.
Also, for those who hate her time-oriented powers and how weakly linked they are to Tatiana herself? Consider this: She’s almost 50 years old by the time Bunkbed Junction starts their revolution. She’s lived long enough to be anyone in the cast’s mom - probably even old enough to be Team Sayu and Yinu’s grandma. She has only seen a progressive march of time erode at everything she ever loved and cared about.
The blazing passion within her is brought back to her through Bunkbed Junction’s actions, but through a reversal of time and a reflection of her memories. Bunkbed Junction literally shatters the world view that she constructed for herself to ignore the regret and pain that had been slowly eating her up inside without her ever even having fully realized it in the first phase. By the time Tatiana reverts back to using her Kul Fyra form, she’s trying so hard to list any number of reasons to ignore her past and focus on what little time she actually has left to work on the future.
This was a bit of a longer explanation and reasoning, but for a character as amazing and symbolically complex as Tatiana, she absolutely deserves it. And as you’ll see for the next character, this is only a fraction of my love for the characters of No Straight Roads. ________________________________________________________________9. Neon J And here we start with my absolutely favorite characters, the ones I not only enjoy reading and writing about, but that in canon I can wholeheartedly accept them for who they are, flaws and all.
My grandpa was in the navy, and to make a long story short there were some complicated things that happened that required me to live with both him and my grandma when I was really little. So already there’s something that I can latch onto and adore. Even with how cringy Neon J is at the end with him attempting to try to give an epic war hero speech, my grandpa can be the same way sometimes, and that’s okay. They kind of act similarly outside of that as well.
His design is so sleek and smooth, and sometimes I forget that he’s actually a cyborg, unlike his sons boyband creations. Normally I hate the military, war, and what it all represents at a cynical level, but when it’s portrayed in a way like No Straight Roads did for Neon J and 1010, it reminds me of the people who actually join to serve their country and the people in it, despite how few in their countries actually deserve their respect.
And yeah, I can already hear the “blah blah fiction is poorly portraying law enforcement/the military because ect ect”. I disagree. Think of it this way: Neon J is a fun example of what a leader in a military unit is. Not only that, he’s extremely loyal and willing to do what it takes to get the job done - including having a program inside 1010 that makes them explode when they fail to generate the requisite fan praise that’s likely required to keep 1010 merchandise flying off of the shelves and thus prove to the other NSR artists that even robot boybands can be used to help Vinyl City; AND use said robot boyband as weapons to fight off any threats - internal or external.
Also think about what he had to go through to become a cyborg. That means he likely had to replace everything that’s on the surface - imagine what he needed to replace underneath all of that metal. How much of his original body is left? How badly did the war he was involved in hurt him? How many comrades did he lose to try to recreate that feel in a boyband? Aren’t the implications of that so much more grand than the surface level “radar head man is bad representation of military people because he’s silly and ineffective at his job”. Furthermore, tell me of a person in the real world who lost so much of their body they literally had to become a cyborg that has a literal radar for a head.
On top of all of that he’s the second half of my second favorite pairing. Not that is has any major bearing on how great Neon J already is. Is it silly that Neon J tries to give a huge speech at the end when we know Bunkbed Junction is just trying to get to Tatiana? Yes. But it’s fun.
I salute the No Straight Roads team for creating such an amazing character . ________________________________________________________________8. Blue 1010 Robot | Purl-Hew Ah yes, now we start getting to what’s taking up most of the top 10 slots. Kind of funny that not all of the 1010 members are going into the top 5 slots with how much I ranted and raved about Neon J. But I have characters I like way more than most of the 1010 band members.
And yes, I’ll bring this up now since we’re actually talking about 1010, that will apply to all the members of 1010 so I don’t have to repeat myself: I already know that they’re meant to parody boy bands, pop bands, and how similar all of them are and ect ect ect. That doesn’t stop me from going “hee hoo pretty boys” at fictional characters. And, yes, I know they don’t canonically have names, but I’m going with what’s been accepted across the fandom. Also all of their body types are the same: I like them alot. They’re tall, in monochrome (hah, chrome), and the way they bob to the beat in their battle is fantastic and shows they are powered by music as much as any machine is in the universe of No Straight Roads.
Starting off with my least favorite of them, Purl-Hew just reminds me of Garnet from “Steven Universe”, which is not a bad thing. It’s just that outside of what we learn of Garnet, she’s a character I often forget exists. I think it’s honestly the shades and the blue, more square-like hair that makes me draw the comparison. Purl-Hew strikes me as the “cool” one. The one that recites his poetry in coffee shops and is the sensitive boy with a cold exterior. You know the kind of person I’m talking about.
Other than that, I like the 1010 branding on the side of his head. I normally don’t like hairstyles like that, but somehow with how it flows and how non-obnoxious it is, I actually find myself liking the hairstyle. Also coupled with the fact that I see him as the second eldest of all five of them, who likely cemented an identity for himself before the others, makes me like his entirety even more.
A cool dude deserves a cool transition, but since this isn’t a video, a line break will have to do. ________________________________________________________________7. Red 1010 Robot | Zimelu Zimelu is one of the ones that strikes me as the one that’s borderline trying to break free from the rest of the band and become his own artist. The mowhawk, the color red, even to what he’s likely supposed to represent in-universe. Many see him as having anger issues, and considering what 1010 is about coupled with, again the hair style and his color, yeah I can see why.
But I also see him having a somewhat tsundere side. Not overtly fully tusndere as “I-It’s not like I like you or anything!” but more of a “Hey, I got you [insert favorite food] to eat. Don’t read too much into it.” while looking off to the side to avoid seeing your reaction just because he’s not sure if he can handle the thought of him possibly being wrong and then seeing you be disappointed kind of tsundere.
I don’t see a lot of peices of work exploring this concept, and I’d love to see more of it - or heck, even other personality traits that could be lying under the rebellious design of him.
I see him as the middle child of the group, which could also add to the rebellious personality and anger issues. Not sure if anyone agrees with me on this though. ________________________________________________________________6. Yellow 1010 Robot | Haym Okay, so this is a bit weird. Haym is my second least favorite in terms of design, but third favorite because he’s supposed to be the sunny, shy, and sweet one. I see him as the second youngest of all of the 1010 members. Old enough to have experience and understand his purpose, but young enough to retain that childhood-like innocence and sweetness.
I think he’s content about his place in 1010. It’s not that he would slack off or anything, but he’d be the most comfortable with his identity out of all five of them, even years down the line. Where Purl-Hew has to upkeep his identity, Haym is fine just being who he is and happy that the crowd accepts him for who he is.
Also him saying “even your lips, which form that raaaaadiant smile~” made me smile like an idiot and my heart flutter when I first saw him - and don’t even get me started on his pose when he was saying that. So that probably has at least some bearing on his placement in this list. ________________________________________________________________5. Green 1010 Robot | Eloni Haym was weird for me to admit I still don’t fully like his design, but Eloni’s design is actually worse for me. I still don’t like the fact he looks like you could hang him on a Christmas tree or a keychain and not be out of place there. But as I learned more - especially the part where in-universe he’s the least-liked because he’s the prankster type, my heart melted for the guy.
While I myself am not a prankster or a fan of prankster types, sympathetic characters that are generally unliked in-universe for something minor or not their fault is something that will always get me to love a character. There’s also a lot of great fanfiction out there for Eloni, playing with the idea of jealousy, feelings of inadequacy, and the resulting love and support that inevitably follows from a strong supporting family.
Also, I see him as the youngest, and likely the one who thought it’d be a good idea to give everyone reindeer heads for the Christmas event instead of whatever was originally planned. The fans probably loved it anyways, even better than what was originally planned, but never knew it was Eloni’s messing around that gave them the toy-soldier-with-reindeer-heads 1010.
Second best 1010 boy deserves to be in the top 5 for all of this and more. ________________________________________________________________4. Tila Tila? You mean the one girl who only goes “pyun” a few times? The only one of Team Sayu that has any voice lines that are more than sobs, grunts, tremoring fear, and sounds of triumph?
Yes. That character. You want to know why?
First, lets start with her design. She wears an oversized hoodie and glasses - already two things I can relate to. The color contrast is just perfect between her hair, skin, and hoodie. Her design alone to me screams “high-functioning introvert”.
Her one line? Going “pyun” a few times? Absolutely adorable. I wanted to hear her say more lines, and the delivery of them being so uncertain filtered through a microphone to not come out that way as Sayu? She is definitely the shy one of the four of them. Also let’s not forget she’s Sayu’s voice actress in universe. Meaning that VS Sayu is something that Tila is singing.
Also, in the background material for Sayu, she’s the one that apologizes for using Remi’s art for one of her songs, and starts the collaboration with all four members of Team Sayu. It’s her story we follow. Not any of the other four members, though Remi does actually say something.
Though we don’t get much else of her, which prevents her from taking a spot in my top 3 picks, if we got just a little bit more from her, I’d definitely bump her to 3rd, maybe even let her take 1st. As it stands, compared to the rest of Team Sayu and Sayu herself, top 5 is nothing to sneeze at. ________________________________________________________________3. Kliff “No one like’s Kliff! He’s evil and bad!”
I mostly disagree with that statement, politely of course. Does no one like him? Seems that way in the fandom, but I like him. Is he evil? Yes, most certainly. Is he “bad”? Well, what’s the context of bad in this case? A bad plot-twist? A bad character? A bad guide? Not really. Well, except for the last part, possibly, but even then he’s still serviceable.
I mean take into context that Tatiana is Kul Fyra. On a first viewing, after having fought so many people after first meeting Kliff, most people would have forgotten that he, like Mayday, also likes Kul Fyra and was even there for her concerts. People who have insane memory would remember it, but for the rest of us, it probably came as a shock that Kliff would send a satellite into the NSR tower.
But he’s a fan that put Kul Fyra on a pillar, just like Mayday. He’d hoped that rock artists would get her back into rock music, to reignite the fire in her, so that he could enjoy her music again. He even says that he’s still her fan. He questions Tatiana “did my loyalty mean nothing to you?”.
And while yes, she didn’t technically owe him anything, the way that Tatiana shoots Kliff down so coldly after all of his attempts and his waiting - after she shut herself away from any potential future differing opinions and banning rock so she couldn’t remember the heartache - he snaps.
I’m not saying that Kliff was right, or that his reaction was fully justified. But imagine him saying he’ll be the strategic planner of NSR - after all, it was thanks to him that Mayday and Zuke got as far as they did. They knew what was coming ahead of time due to his advice. Mayday and Zuke would just be figureheads. It would be entirely realistic, and not make Kliff entirely evil.
Still, with all the hypotheticals out of the way, having an entirely selfish twist villain like Kliff was amazing. When you go through the entire story knowing how it will end on a second playthrough, suddenly his motives and what he says makes so much more sense.
I want to see (or maybe someday I’ll write) a redemption arc for Kliff. He’s not so fargone that I’d write him off as another villain for the sake of evil, but it would take actual work and effort. It’s something I look forwards to seeing in the far future.
Though he is also fun to see as an antagonist in all of these stories I read about him. ________________________________________________________________2. Zuke On a scale of 1 to 10, I’d rank Zuke an 11. From his design, to his animations, to his background, his voice, his lines - everything is an 11/10 for me.
Starting with design again, normally I’d dislike the major contrast such a saturated green against a saturated blue. But there’s other bits in Zuke’s design - his red eyes, the fact that his clothing is a good neutral base to draw away from the chaos of colors of his head - only to lead back into what looks like ultra-comfortable blue-and-green flannel with dark blue flats? It all screams the perfect chill dude to hang out with.
His personality matches too. He’s laid-back, wise, rational, humble, and kind. Almost the perfect man in every way. Though he has his limits, especially when it comes to DK West, and he’s not always the most intelligent at times. Sometimes he takes a minute to put two-and-two together, especially when he’s under pressure and nervous.
And his drumsticks being used as a walking cane when he’s not battling, admitting that it’s NSR property - recognizing that NSR itself is not bad, it just needs change. He doesn’t generally talk smack unless, again, it’s DK West. He probably says less than Mayday does out of the two, but I wasn’t counting. I was just thankful that he was talking at all, attempting to be the voice of reason in situations, telling Eve he was wrong for leaving so suddenly (even though he’s not at fault for his hair being set on fire), reconciling with DK West after Mayday gets them to talk about their feelings to each other - he experiences the most growth over the longest period of time.
In fact, it feels like we’re witnessing Zuke’s entire story through the eyes of Mayday. Sure, Mayday has a stake in the conflict, and a small bit of growth, but none nearly so much as the jolly green giant between them. Heck, he’s so good that he made DJ Subatomic Supernova’s music actually sound good.
If this wasn’t enough, he’s also one half of my favorite pairing. Where’s the other half? Where he belongs of course. ________________________________________________________________1. White 1010 Robot | Rin Look guys, my favorite character of No Straight Roads is finally here. Let me be the ideal fan and give him my utmost attention.
ATTENTION!
Hoo boy have I been waiting to talk about Rin! His design is the one that I love the most despite how simple and obviously pandering it is. I mean come on, he’s got the kind of hairstyle that just screams “typical emo/scene/goth/pop leader” without the sweeping bit of hair in front of the eye like Haym’s or other emo/scene/goth hair styles. He has no unique colors to himself (white and black are technically not colors). Heck, as a robot meant to parody pop/boybands, he technically should be the most bland and uninteresting part of 1010.
But that’s where you’d be wrong. Rin is the one who leads the flirting attempt against Mayday. Rin is the one who is focused on the most of all the 1010 members when the cutscenes play. Rin is the one who’s talking the most in the promotional video for 1010 and No Straight Roads. Even though Zimelu takes up most of the spot in the in-game photo op, Rin is the second most noticable. In the “wefies” the 1010 members make in the promotional video, Rin is front and center.
Rin is the poster child. Meaning he has the most mounting on him of all the members of 1010. And this can manifest in any number of interesting character traits. I’ve already written an (as of posting this review) three chapter fanfic on Rin and his dynamic with not only the other half of my favorite pairing, but also his dynamic with Neon J, and how both Zuke and Neon J view Rin - through what I perceive how Rin actually feels and acts when he’s not on stage.
I could probably do an entire 20 minute review on why Rin is the single-best character of No Straight Roads, both in and out of canon, but I don’t have the tools for it. And as a side note, the guitar solo that Mayday can play over the song is the single-best of all the guitar solos, the second being the one against Yinu - and that deep passion for 1010 is reflected well in the guitar solo.
Zuke may be an 11/10, but Rin is a perfect 10/10 - and I wouldn’t have it any other way . ________________________________________________________________Afterwords Finally, after an entire 4 hours of writing, I’d like to hear your thoughts on all of this, if you’ve made it this far.
What did you agree and disagree with? Feel free to comment if you want.
As for me, I think I’ll continue to browse the work of the fandom, keep an ear out for any future updates or sequels, and rock on with the amazing soundtrack of No Straight Roads jamming loudly in my ears.
Rock on fellow No Straight Roads fans! Or whatever genre you prefer to listen to.
#Core Character Ranking#character ranking#NSR#no straight roads#long post#nsr zuke#nsr mayday#nsr djss#nsr dj ss#nsr dj subatomic supernova#dj subatomic supernova#djss#dj ss#nsr sayu#sayu#nsr dodo#dodo#nsr remi#remi#nsr sofa#sofa#nsr tila#tila#nsr yinu#yinu#nsr mother#yinu's mom#nsr neon j#neon j#nsr 1010
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Have you listened to folklore yet?? Can you do commentary on all the songs??
it’s time.
THE 1
This song has a funny vibe in comparison with “I Forgot that You Existed” - it really sets a tone of calm, quiet vibes in comparison to the more bombastic stuff on Lover. Also this song is kind of a banger. It has a very gentle rhythm, like I’m in the sun in the woods and I’m in my hammock. I have a hammock now and I’m considering moving into it. “It would’ve been fun / if you would’ve been the one.” Also I love the “I had this dream you’re doing cool shit” - so fun, so sweet. Taylor said a curse word.
CARDIGAN
This song is proof to me that this album was produced by a Dessner because it has the same repetitive piano that I would say is a hallmark of National songs - it sounds a lot like “Light Years” to me. That song is, by the way, an absolute banger. This song? Fun! It’s an interesting metaphor, and an interesting way of saying the point of the song. And I think it’s much more grounded than some more old school Taylor metaphors of like fairytale stuff. “Tried to change ending / Peter losing Wendy.”
THE LAST GREAT AMERICAN DYNASTY
As we ALL KNOW, this song is about Taylor’s wonderful little house wherein the great Fourth of July celebration took place all over Instagram in the Red era. I googled it and it’s semi-biographical! I think it’s clear that Taylor is making commentary on her life on the Cape just as much as she is telling the story of this person, Rebekah Harkness. It’s an interesting piece of self-awareness to compare herself to an oil heiress who caused quite the stir in a segment of the world that is full of big stirrers (ie the Kennedys who I’m pretty sure she was neighbors with somewhere down the beach). I’m intrigued. She is having fun.
EXILE (FEAT BON IVER)
This will sound like absurd hyperbole but between Bon Iver and Taylor Swift, I’d be hard pressed to name two artists who have fucked up my life more. Getting to hear his beautiful baritone without layers of distress like he’s been rolling with lately is a gift. Thank you to Taylor Swift. “I can see you staring, honey / like he’s just your understudy / like you’d get your knuckles bloody / for me.” VIBEZ???? ARE WE VIBING????? I AM VIBGIN!!!!!! “Those eyes add insult to injury????”” BANGER!!! IT’S A BANGER. THAT BREAKDOWNN!!!! LET’S ROLL!!!! LET’S GET FUCKED UP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I’m PUTTING THIS ON SO MANY PLAYLISTS!!!!!!!!!!
MY TEARS RICOCHET
LET’S GET EMO !!!!!!!! You know, just recently I was discussing with Lynne (or myself? I talk to myself about Taylor a lot) about how she’s gonna go on her like farewell tour when she’s 50-60 or whatever and it’s gonna be all these low-down sexy baller mixes, like when Cyndi Lauper did her greatest hits cover release (it’s a banger!). This album is just an excuse for her to sing in her low register. God, I’d die for her. I love how sad this is. I have too many favorite lines. “I didn’t have it in myself to go with grace / ‘cause when I’d fight, you used to tell me I was brave / And if I’m dead to you why are you at the wake?” ALSO “And you can aim for my heart, go for blood / But you would still miss me in your bones.” OKAY HONEY!!!!!!! This is a clear Supercorp song. Since I know this is why you are asking. Start here for fic titles.
MIRRORBALL
Oh, okay, Taylor went to the woods and listened to Ryan Adams, Bon Iver, and just fucked around and made shoe gaze pop? What kind of talent!!!! Her last album was premium pop. Why is she like this. This song is very interesting. It’s very sweet. The phrasing on “tallest tiptoes / highest heels” oh my God. I love this song. I might cry.
SEVEN
Another absolute National-style production, God, we are living in my dream world on this album. “I’ve been meaning to tell you / I think your house is haunted / Your dad is always mad and that must be why / And I think you should come live with me / and we can be pirates.” WHAT A JOKE. WHAT A JOKE!!!!!!! What a beautiful portrait of childhood. There’s a scene in Spring Awakening (the musical, I can only assume now that Taylor is a big fan), where they talk about playing pirates when they were younger and now everything is tragic. “Are there still beautiful things?” It shouldn’t be that easy bro.
AUGUST
This, like “Seven” is an Antonoff production, which is just vibes. The dreaminess. We are vibing. As much as I am inclined to hate the line, “August slipped away like a bottle of wine” it is phrased so well and delicately that it comes across more dreamy than wine mom memey. I also just want to say that I bought the OG vinyl and the “meet me behind the mall” vinyl and after hearing the song that it comes from it’s a vibe. This is obviously a teenage romp song, which is really great because obviously Taylor wrote about being a teenager in love when she was a teenager and wrote about like, the classic world-ending Romeo and Juliet style fairytale. But this is….”meet me behind the mall.” Which is such an adult perspective on what being a teenager is. It’s so wonderful to see that artistic depth in an artist we’ve literally watched grow.
THIS IS ME TRYING
I feel like this is the depression song that should have been on Reputation but was so out of step with the rest of the album between it’s thunderous anger / thunderous oh-shit-I’m-into-this-dude that they couldn’t work it in. And it doesn’t quite vibe with Lover either…this whole song is GREAT. It’s very depression 101. It makes me cry also. “They told me all of my cages were mental / so I got wasted like all my potential / and my words shoot to kill when I’m mad / I have a lot of regrets about that.” I LOVE the way she sings “I have a lot of regrets about that.” Also “and it’s hard to be at a party / when I feel like an open wound.” Absolute banger.
ILLICIT AFFAIRS
I feel we should give this song the true banger status because Taylor wrote a song about a girl who is the other woman and it’s empathetic. God, we love progress. This song also does a good job of being about the other woman, but also has a little more universal appeal. I know when I heard this I was like, “oof, okay, I don’t miss being 16.” The word mercurial is used in this song.
INVISIBLE STRING
Not to get too emo about it, but this song is adorable and it’s messed up that she wrote it. The idea behind it that I think must be fairly common for people who are in love, that their lives have unique crossover moments, and there’s this hope/want to believe that you were always going to end up in this place because of all those connections? That’s kind of a complex thing (imo) to express. And she WROTE IT!!!! God. If I were Joe Alwyn I would cry every day.
MAD WOMAN
The fact that Taylor would ever attempt to make me believe this is not about Scooter Braun is insane. I love this song. Proof of concept that you don’t need to yell to show how mad you are.
EPIPHANY
This song is sad. But very interesting. I don’t think I’ve ever heard her write anything like this. I think the back half of this album is a little more experimental.
BETTY
I’m not sure what I’m expected to say here. I know that this song is not actually gay. But I don’t care. It’s country twang from a boy’s perspective and you know what? We’re taking it. We are taking it for ourselves. But also, I love that she chose to write this weird “teenage love triangle” set of songs and that she chose to write none of them from like, her perspective? Right? “August” is James cheating on Betty, “Illicit Affairs” is the other woman, and this is James…when Taylor was 17 she would have written this song from Betty’s perspective. And that’s what we would have got. There’s real growth in storytelling here, and a real interest in expanding the canon of what she’s writing about. It’s really great to see an artist do that. Also the way she sings “The worst thing that I ever did / was what / I did to you.” This whole song is a masterpiece. I hate her.
PEACE
I just learned that Joe Alwyn is a Pisces. I am A PISCES. TAYLOR!!!! WE COULD BE TOGETHER.
I love the “I talk shit with my friends / It’s like I’m wasting your honor.” This song is so adult. She’s in like. Real love bro. BRO. I AM HAPPY FOR HER. BRO!!!!!!
HOAX
I am interested in why this is the last song on the non-deluxe version of the album. I don’t have a lot to say about this but that it reminds me of Wuthering Heights. Also if you wanted to get emo this is probably a good SC song.
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Imma just say my thoughts on the show. I've go so much to say about Tiny Pretty Things lmao. Spoilers under the gif. I'd love to do the See More thing so y'all dont have to scroll if you don't care but tumblr is bugging out on my laptop and mobile doesn't have that option.
So I originally thought that the show would be haunting of bly manor/hill house meets ballet. Those vibes you know. The trailer was amazingly done. Sucks the show wasn't.
The trailor showed Cassie falling/being pushed off the roof, Cruz trying to bring her back and that's really the last the viewer sees of her. I thought Cassie was dead. I thought it would be a murder mystery but nope. Cassie survived and woke up from her coma. I thought racism would be tackled. Nope. Never even mentioned. Some cool double life. Not really. You've got pedophile rapist and girls being pimped out. All the chatacters apart from Torri and Matteos mom are insufferable. I hated all of them and didn't give a shit about them.
Neveah is the main girl. She's a 16/17 year old girl of color entering a rich elite school of ballet. By the end of the show, the watcher knows nothing about her apart from her felon mom and wheel chair bound brother. Neveah started off strong in ep 1 and 2 but turned into a side chatacter. Bette, the rich white girl, becomes the main chatacter. She gets more scenes than Neveah and more developed relationships. She also gets a homophobic boyfriend so.. Yeah. We meet her mom and brother. Then you never see them again. Like literally after the music video scene they just disappear. They don't even show up at the Ripper dance or call Nev. Nev reminds me of Grace/Anna from Grand Army. Like Anna, they were terrible friends to the girls who got assaulted. Nev knew something was up with June but did nothing. Then she goes to the reporter about the assault when June specifically asked her not to and ended up putting June in danger. Nev does not care about the people around her until they become beneficial to her and her agenda. She had no reason to visit Cassie when they didn't even know each other.
Bette is the elite rich white girl with pretty privilege. She did EVERYONE dirty yet they all defended her when June and Shane got mad at her for good reasons. She had the audacity to forgive her homophobic boyfriend. He called someone a f*g just cause they bumped into him and Shane lashed out at him. It's not Bette's place to forgive him when his homophobia doesn't harm her. She is probably one of the characters with the most sex scenes. She also basically ignored her boyfriend's eating disorder. She's also a drug addict so sis has a lot of shit going on in her story.
Shane borderline assaulted Oren and is a hypocrite. His character was ruined for me the moment he shoved his hand down Orens pants and pushed him on the bed when Oren was trying to do the right thing. He continued to call Nabil psycho and never apologized for it even after Nabil was cleared. He's also in a relationship with an adult. I believe he's a sex addict as well.
Oren is bland. No personality and suddenly caught feelings for Nev even tho they only had a conversation like twice. He has an eating disorder and I hope it's more touched upon since lots of guys go through eating disorders.
June is.. I have mixed feelings about her. Some eps I loved her other eps I hated her. She's a thief, lier, crybaby but she tried doing the right thing a few times and realized Bette was playing her. She accused Neveah with no evidence about the door jam. Their friendship is so weird. The moment her mom chose not to meet Ramon I knew they were going for the 'villian is one of the characters dad'. If done well, the trope is great. They didn't do well. Also, girl in red vibes from her.
Nabil was the most tolerable characters on the show. He was accused left and right. His roommate hated him for PRAYING. Orin and Caleb were so lowkey racist towards him and Caleb was outright islamphobic. He didn't hold back. Nabil and Neveah had potential but Nabil chose Cassie and then suddenly went for June? Idk that was dumb. I don't hate him. I'm neutral about him.
Caleb can suck a big fat dick. I hate him with every fiber in my being. He was so islamphobic. Like for no reason. He got mad that his roommate prayed. You bet your ass he would care if Nabil was Christian. Are you fucking serious? Then he has the AUDACITY to suddenly become buddy buddy with him. I'm happy Nabil had none of his shit at the start. I hate his voice too.
Cassie should've died. They could've still had her be in those dreams. It would've been like her haunting them. Her parents suck. Her relationship with Ramon was unnecessary. I do like that she isn't sweet and is instead a bitch.
Cruz is as useful as the cop from Elite.
Matteo is lowkey a pedophile and is also homophobic. I wish they didn't make him homophobic cause his character is nice but he enables the fuck out of Bette. He tells her off then smiles and comforts her. Dev is confirmed a pedo and is a dick. He doesn't know what he wants and got mad at Shane for not liking a homophobe. Did nothing about his bosses going after pimped out teens until others knew about it.
I have mixed feelings about Delia. They could've had her reason for confronting Cassie be that she didn't want to be outshined instead of her being mad about Cassie stealing her man. Delia is the golden child and seems like she knows it but doesn't care. She also acts like she cares about Bette but if she did she wouldn't had let Bette take the fall for her.
Ramon was messy. I didn't like hoe touchy he got with Bette or that he kissed her. I would've been just as petty if the woman who groomed me as a young dancer decided to suddenly announce I would be choreographing for her dancers. He groomed Cassie, made someone touch his dick, and also bascially flashed Shane.
There was a sex scene and an ass in every ep so if you wanted to watch this show with your fam, I'd reconsider. It's gross considering half the characters are minors. They could've aged them up to college students that are 18-20.
This is a show about minors for adults. Feel free to chat or add anything. I'll be happy to respond and discuss this show.
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19 Parents Share What Their Kid Remembered About Their ‘Last’ Life
1. He showed us his grave
When my brother was about 2 or 3 he told us his name used to be Austin. One day we were picnicking right along side a cemetery, when my brother took off running towards the gravestones, my dad and I followed him and found him touching a large headstone that simply read “Here Lies Austin” no name, no date. My brother did not learn to read until he was 6 and this headstone wasn’t even right out visible from where we were, yet he ran right to it
2. We don’t watch firefighter things
my son told me a few months ago he “used to be a firefighter, and we got called to a fire. There wasn’t any family inside the house, so we just put the fire out. Then the fire truck caught on fire and I died”. A few nights later, he elaborated he was taken to a hospital, where he died. We don’t watch firefighter things.
3. Her “other” mother’s name was Sally
I was talking to my four year old when she began to freak me out. She was telling me a story about her “other mother” and that she “died a long time ago on a Thursday.” I tried to brush it off, you know, whatever, shes a kid, they have wild imaginations… but then she started to go further into detail about the death of her “other mother,” whose name was apparently Sally. She has never met anyone named Sally, and I can’t recall any shows on TV she watches where “Sally” is a character. She told me that she was playing with her father’s gun that she found and accidentally shot and killed Sally while she was walking upstairs. It’s pretty weird. There are no guns in this house, I haven’t even really told her what guns are all about and how they can hurt or kill someone, shes only four! I think I am beginning to understand now why when I try to tell her when someone dies, they go away forever, she tells me that, that is not true. “We come back, mommy!” I’m only 23, I had my daughter very young and despite not being prepared, I don’t think I could have ever prepared for a conversation like that!
4. “When she lived before she was born”
My daughter did the same thing at the same age. She told me about her life “when she lived before she was born” and described herself as a woman with long hair who lived in an apartment with a long flight of stairs outside of it. She drove a VW Bug and wore long skirts. She then told me that she fell down the stairs and died. Her stories were startlingly vivid and always consistent. Quite spooky. She is now 19 and doesnt remember it. My advice would be write down everything your daughter tells you on the subject. Everything! Record her stories if you can.
5. Roanoke?
I would tell my older sister about my death. I told her my husband was captured and fire was everywhere. I took my young son and ran. I told her my son couldn’t run fast enough. I knew we would get killed and I had my husbands knife on me, I wanted to leave a clue. I wrote in capitals “CROATOAN” I told her we were caught and how my son was killed before I was killed. I told her how I was stabbed in the stomach with a knife. Then, I went about playing with dolls. I can still picture the scene and my son to this day.
6. “She used to come visit me”
my son says he remember his great grandmother (my grandmother) and can describe her in perfect detail (how she looks, how she acted, even what brand of cigarettes she smoked) , although she died 11 days before he was born. He says that she used to come visit him in his dreams.
7. Conchon
Apparently beginning around the time my friend could form sentences until he was little more than 2, he would go on and on about how he was a Native American named Conchon and that after his wife and son got sick and died, he moved to a mountain to live by himself with his horse. He died of a broken neck when he fell into a ravine.
8. “My real mom and dad were killed when the bad men came.”
when I was 2 or 3 I was talking to my grandmother and told her that my mom and dad weren’t my real mom and dad. My grandmother, knowing this wasn’t true, said they were. I calmly explained that no, my real mom and dad were killed when the bad men came. I had lived because my mom hid me behind a rock. I then went on to describe white men with guns and us “dark” people with long hair. When I was done, I went back to eating my ice cream.
9. Jesus
My cousin, approximately 3 years old and riding in the car with my mum and dad, pointed out a random house that they went past and declared “I died there”.
10. Included because, WHAT?
I did something sort of similar I guess. When I was about 3 my mum and I were driving over a bridge on which there’d recently been a major accident that resulted in a car bursting into flames and the driver dying. Anyway, I asked my mum who the man in the front seat was and when she told me to describe him I said, “Well he’s on fire and he keeps looking back at me.”
11. I drowned
My mother told me about a story I told her when I was 2 or 3. I told her she was the best mommy I ever had, to which she replied, “I’m the only mommy you’ve ever had.” “nu-uh, I had another mommy.” I said that my older sister and I went out to a pond in the woods behind my house. Around the pond, all of the trees were the same type: skinny with white paper-like bark. (I had never seen a poplar tree before in this life.) We put some logs together to make a raft, and put it into the water to play boat captain and climbed aboard. The raft fell apart, and I didn’t know how to swim. I tried to grab a log, but my hand slipped off. I could see my sister freaking out from underwater. I drowned.
12. My war memories
one of 6 hopping out of a helicopter into a field, it’s hot as shit, humid, daytime, two house/buildings smoking and heavily burning straight in front of me (to the side of the chopper), and there’s firing from the woods and field to my right. It’s chaotic a noisy, lots of firing and helicopters, my guys are firing back crouched next to the back building, one guy runs out of the other building with a kid he pushes forward and yells at to run, the kid gets shot from out of nowhere, and drops. I see a few of my guys advancing from another chopper behind me duck down in the grass as their chopper leaves, I crouch in tall grass about 10 feet from my chopper, fire my rifle twice from just above the grass line, and my chopper starts to take off, and is taking fire. I get up to move forward, panicky, and am shot dead – I feel a hard thunk, see part my chest explode, fall forward go black, and zoom out above my body. I also drew this later (still have pics, mom saved them). To me, it’s clear as day, still. Mom said some of my first chatter was about “heavy fire” “zip em boys” (don’t know what that means) and I would ask “Where are the hueys?” I was born in the early 70s, and my family was NOT military (very anti, actually). I err on the side of thinking it’s media (news footage?) I absorbed at some point from the Viet Nam war, but I also wonder if it’s not a past-life dream.
13. “That’s why I don’t like water now”
When my kid was 4, we were watching a docu on the Titanic. The scene was a picture of the schematics of the boiler room and the camera panned from left to right over the plans. He pointed at the tv and said, “That’s wrong. The boilers were on the Other side. And I was right here.” And he pointed to a small space in the boiler room. “That’s where I was. And that’s why I don’t like water now.”
14. My family’s farm, burning
When I was younger I would have dreams of living in colonial american. I remember bits very vividly and only when I was older did I realize what they were about and how accurate they were. Most of the dreams consisted of me being in my late teen years and centered around my family’s farm being set on fire during the night. I never dreamed past that night, nothing about the aftermath of the fire, and I haven’t had one in years.
15. “Nobody scroofs me there”
Getting my two and a half year old daughter out of the bath one night, my wife and I were briefing her on how important it was she kept her privates clean. She casually replied “Oh, nobody ‘scroofs’ me there. They tried one night. They kicked the door in and tried but I fought back. I died and now I’m here.” She said this like it was nothing. My wife and I were catatonic.
16. Nope
“Before I was born here, I had a sister, right? Her and my other Mom are so old now. They were ok when the car was on fire, but I sure wasn’t!”
17. “Their screams are keeping me up”
I was in my room on the computer at about 11, which is late for my sister to be awake even now. I was thinking about bed, but then my sister knocks on the door. She was maybe 10 at the time, so not so young that she doesn’t know when she’s dreaming. She wanted to sleep in my room because she was sad and scared. I asked her why, and she said, “I watched your sons burn up in the fire. Their screams are keeping me up.”
18. Role reversal
My three year old said, “Remember when I was the grown-up and you were the little boy?�� to his Dad.
19. When he was a grown up
My father used to hate policemen when he was a kid, he used to tell my grandmother that they came to his house and shot him when he was a grown up.
19 Parents Share What Their Kid Remembered About Their ‘Last’ Life paranormal ghost and hauntings
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May 26th, 2019
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19 Parents Share What Their Kid Remembered About Their ‘Last’ Life1. He showed us his grave
When my brother was about 2 or 3 he told us his name used to be Austin. One day we were picnicking right along side a cemetery, when my brother took off...
19 Parents Share What Their Kid Remembered About Their ‘Last’ Life
1. He showed us his grave
When my brother was about 2 or 3 he told us his name used to be Austin. One day we were picnicking right along side a cemetery, when my brother took off running towards the gravestones, my dad and I followed him and found him touching a large headstone that simply read “Here Lies Austin” no name, no date. My brother did not learn to read until he was 6 and this headstone wasn’t even right out visible from where we were, yet he ran right to it
2. We don’t watch firefighter things
my son told me a few months ago he “used to be a firefighter, and we got called to a fire. There wasn’t any family inside the house, so we just put the fire out. Then the fire truck caught on fire and I died”. A few nights later, he elaborated he was taken to a hospital, where he died. We don’t watch firefighter things.
3. Her “other” mother’s name was Sally
I was talking to my four year old when she began to freak me out. She was telling me a story about her “other mother” and that she “died a long time ago on a Thursday.” I tried to brush it off, you know, whatever, shes a kid, they have wild imaginations… but then she started to go further into detail about the death of her “other mother,” whose name was apparently Sally. She has never met anyone named Sally, and I can’t recall any shows on TV she watches where “Sally” is a character. She told me that she was playing with her father’s gun that she found and accidentally shot and killed Sally while she was walking upstairs. It’s pretty weird. There are no guns in this house, I haven’t even really told her what guns are all about and how they can hurt or kill someone, shes only four! I think I am beginning to understand now why when I try to tell her when someone dies, they go away forever, she tells me that, that is not true. “We come back, mommy!” I’m only 23, I had my daughter very young and despite not being prepared, I don’t think I could have ever prepared for a conversation like that!
4. “When she lived before she was born”
My daughter did the same thing at the same age. She told me about her life “when she lived before she was born” and described herself as a woman with long hair who lived in an apartment with a long flight of stairs outside of it. She drove a VW Bug and wore long skirts. She then told me that she fell down the stairs and died. Her stories were startlingly vivid and always consistent. Quite spooky. She is now 19 and doesnt remember it. My advice would be write down everything your daughter tells you on the subject. Everything! Record her stories if you can.
5. Roanoke?
I would tell my older sister about my death. I told her my husband was captured and fire was everywhere. I took my young son and ran. I told her my son couldn’t run fast enough. I knew we would get killed and I had my husbands knife on me, I wanted to leave a clue. I wrote in capitals “CROATOAN” I told her we were caught and how my son was killed before I was killed. I told her how I was stabbed in the stomach with a knife. Then, I went about playing with dolls. I can still picture the scene and my son to this day.
6. “She used to come visit me”
my son says he remember his great grandmother (my grandmother) and can describe her in perfect detail (how she looks, how she acted, even what brand of cigarettes she smoked) , although she died 11 days before he was born. He says that she used to come visit him in his dreams.
7. Conchon
Apparently beginning around the time my friend could form sentences until he was little more than 2, he would go on and on about how he was a Native American named Conchon and that after his wife and son got sick and died, he moved to a mountain to live by himself with his horse. He died of a broken neck when he fell into a ravine.
8. “My real mom and dad were killed when the bad men came.”
when I was 2 or 3 I was talking to my grandmother and told her that my mom and dad weren’t my real mom and dad. My grandmother, knowing this wasn’t true, said they were. I calmly explained that no, my real mom and dad were killed when the bad men came. I had lived because my mom hid me behind a rock. I then went on to describe white men with guns and us “dark” people with long hair. When I was done, I went back to eating my ice cream.
9. Jesus
My cousin, approximately 3 years old and riding in the car with my mum and dad, pointed out a random house that they went past and declared “I died there”.
10. Included because, WHAT?
I did something sort of similar I guess. When I was about 3 my mum and I were driving over a bridge on which there’d recently been a major accident that resulted in a car bursting into flames and the driver dying. Anyway, I asked my mum who the man in the front seat was and when she told me to describe him I said, “Well he’s on fire and he keeps looking back at me.”
11. I drowned
My mother told me about a story I told her when I was 2 or 3. I told her she was the best mommy I ever had, to which she replied, “I’m the only mommy you’ve ever had.” “nu-uh, I had another mommy.” I said that my older sister and I went out to a pond in the woods behind my house. Around the pond, all of the trees were the same type: skinny with white paper-like bark. (I had never seen a poplar tree before in this life.) We put some logs together to make a raft, and put it into the water to play boat captain and climbed aboard. The raft fell apart, and I didn’t know how to swim. I tried to grab a log, but my hand slipped off. I could see my sister freaking out from underwater. I drowned.
12. My war memories
one of 6 hopping out of a helicopter into a field, it’s hot as shit, humid, daytime, two house/buildings smoking and heavily burning straight in front of me (to the side of the chopper), and there’s firing from the woods and field to my right. It’s chaotic a noisy, lots of firing and helicopters, my guys are firing back crouched next to the back building, one guy runs out of the other building with a kid he pushes forward and yells at to run, the kid gets shot from out of nowhere, and drops. I see a few of my guys advancing from another chopper behind me duck down in the grass as their chopper leaves, I crouch in tall grass about 10 feet from my chopper, fire my rifle twice from just above the grass line, and my chopper starts to take off, and is taking fire. I get up to move forward, panicky, and am shot dead – I feel a hard thunk, see part my chest explode, fall forward go black, and zoom out above my body. I also drew this later (still have pics, mom saved them). To me, it’s clear as day, still. Mom said some of my first chatter was about “heavy fire” “zip em boys” (don’t know what that means) and I would ask “Where are the hueys?” I was born in the early 70s, and my family was NOT military (very anti, actually). I err on the side of thinking it’s media (news footage?) I absorbed at some point from the Viet Nam war, but I also wonder if it’s not a past-life dream.
13. “That’s why I don’t like water now”
When my kid was 4, we were watching a docu on the Titanic. The scene was a picture of the schematics of the boiler room and the camera panned from left to right over the plans. He pointed at the tv and said, “That’s wrong. The boilers were on the Other side. And I was right here.” And he pointed to a small space in the boiler room. “That’s where I was. And that’s why I don’t like water now.”
14. My family’s farm, burning
When I was younger I would have dreams of living in colonial american. I remember bits very vividly and only when I was older did I realize what they were about and how accurate they were. Most of the dreams consisted of me being in my late teen years and centered around my family’s farm being set on fire during the night. I never dreamed past that night, nothing about the aftermath of the fire, and I haven’t had one in years.
15. “Nobody scroofs me there”
Getting my two and a half year old daughter out of the bath one night, my wife and I were briefing her on how important it was she kept her privates clean. She casually replied “Oh, nobody ‘scroofs’ me there. They tried one night. They kicked the door in and tried but I fought back. I died and now I’m here.” She said this like it was nothing. My wife and I were catatonic.
16. Nope
“Before I was born here, I had a sister, right? Her and my other Mom are so old now. They were ok when the car was on fire, but I sure wasn’t!”
17. “Their screams are keeping me up”
I was in my room on the computer at about 11, which is late for my sister to be awake even now. I was thinking about bed, but then my sister knocks on the door. She was maybe 10 at the time, so not so young that she doesn’t know when she’s dreaming. She wanted to sleep in my room because she was sad and scared. I asked her why, and she said, “I watched your sons burn up in the fire. Their screams are keeping me up.”
18. Role reversal
My three year old said, “Remember when I was the grown-up and you were the little boy?” to his Dad.
19. When he was a grown up
My father used to hate policemen when he was a kid, he used to tell my grandmother that they came to his house and shot him when he was a grown up.
#19 Parents Share What Their Kid Remembered About Their ‘Last’ Life#paranormal#ghost and spirits#ghost and hauntings#haunted salem#ghoststories
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I. NEED. TO. LEARN. MORE. ABOUT. FERRO's. UNIVERSE. Like are you kidding me? Fuego and Leo pulled a coup and killed every non-vermillion??! that's, wow, that's rich!! What's the heck is wrong with /THAT/ timeline? What about Asta's story there? the elves? the devils? Fuego really killed everyone? including NOZEL? I HAVE SO MANY QUESTIONS!
OH MY GOD ANON YOU’VE MADE MY ENTIRE DAY
HONESTLY this AU is underdeveloped because of the way it came to fruition in the first place, so nothing would make me happier but to make it a collaborative fandom project but here’s everything I’ve got on it
Under a Read More because it might get lengthy
First, a disclaimer: This AU was born out of a dream. I had a dream about a plucky teenager participating in a Magic Knight’s exam that was designed more like The Hunger Games, and when I woke up, I said to myself, I gotta get in on that. So that’s why some of the details of this AU are a little fucky. Dream logic.
Now, the inciting event for this AU is twofold: First, Acier lives. SECOND, her sister, Kirsch and Mimosa’s mother, dies giving birth to Mimosa.
Sister’s death completely breaks down any bond between the Vermillions and the Silvas. It’s just. Messy. A lot of finger pointing, a lot of people not handling things well. Because while the Silvas were taught from a young age to bottle up their feelings, Vermillions tend to use their feelings as a weapon. And relations go south fast.
Acier has still been training Meoroleona. Nozel and Fuegoleon have still been rivals. But when this happens, everyone is forced to pick a side. Acier and Meoroleona don’t end their relationship on bad terms, but they do end it. Nozel and Fuegoleon’s relationship swiftly turns hostile. In hindsight, nobody is happy about the way things went down, but at this point there’s a No Man’s Land to civility that nobody is willing to cross, and nobody will cross it.
The Vermillions have the roughest time with this, but unlike the way the Silvas handled Noelle, nobody actually blames Mimosa for her mother’s death. They turn their grief into what they see as righteous fury and determine to turn this into a “What doesn’t kill me makes me stronger” situation. This takes different forms over the years, but what basically happens is that everyone internalizes these feelings so deeply that while they all grow stronger, they also sort of grow apart.
Fuegoleon and Meoroleona have a blowout that completely shakes House Vermillion, and when Meoroleona leaves, she vows to never come back. No one believes that she would actually stay away, what with how close Fuego and Meoro were as kids, but when she leaves, she leaves. They see her once a year TOPS, and it’s never for a happy reason.
Fuegoleon, who has let his anger completely isolate him from the rest of his family, throws himself into being the Crimson Lion King, and while he’s incredibly successful, he loses parts of himself along the way. His ambitions override his caring nature and his inclination to share his strengths with others, and he becomes cold and determined, with a methodical outlook on relationships.
Leopold doesn’t become so callous-- he wasn’t old enough to remember his aunt’s death, he just had to grow up in the aftermath of it --but he follows in his brother’s footsteps, and while he’s not as mean about the way he does it, he’s not afraid to make some harsh decisions if it means being the best.
Kirsch and Mimosa decide that the best way to deal with this is to keep their heads down. Kirsch is fiercely protective of his little sister, because even though nobody is blaming Mimosa, he can’t shake the feeling that she may still have a target on her back. This makes Mimosa jumpy and clingy, never really developing the confidence to be her own person. While she can’t really nail down a particular reason for it, she’s scared of Fuegoleon and doesn’t trust Leopold. She can’t help but wonder how her cousins in House Silva are doing, but knows that all hell would break loose if she actually sought them out, so she feels constantly stuck between a rock and a hard place; the living embodiment of a schism between the royal houses.
The Silvas, on the other hand, go the other direction. Acier is still here, and she’s not letting her family rip itself apart like it did in canon. She remains the captain of the Silver Eagles and well-respected. Her kids have an even easier ride to the top with her still there to pave the way. She misses Meoroleona terribly. She knows that none of this was fair to any of them, and losing her sister AND her star pupil is a lot to work through. She keeps thinking that eventually she’ll get a letter or a surprise visit from the Undefeated Lioness, but she never does.
Nozel is genuinely heartbroken to have lost his rival and best friend, and, consequently, be left in the dust when he can’t keep up with Fuegoleon’s ambition, but he’s still got his mother and three little siblings, so they become his whole life. Without Fuegoleon’s rivalry to spur him on, he becomes good but not great, and is content to coast. He’s a mama’s boy, and as long as his mother is satisfied, he’d rather read and organize missions than go on them. On the bright side, he doesn’t deal with 90% of the stress he deals with in the canon universe. He’s actually pretty happy most of the time.
Nebra ends up being the classic middle sibling. Her magic is nothing special, but she’s a Silva, so she can go with the flow and still come out looking a little better than everyone else. While Nozel would rather spend time with books and Solid and Noelle would rather spend time with each other, she’s a drifter; she can hang with any of her siblings, or her mother, but she’s no one’s first pick. It doesn’t really bother her all that much unless she feels genuinely left out, and Mom never forgets about her, so it’s all good.
Solid and Noelle are thick as thieves, and the Silver Eagles’ superstars. They bring out the worst of each other and have a great time doing it. They’re a dynamic duo on the battle field and harbor unfathomable chaotic energy off of it. Getting sucked into their gravitational pull is dangerous, so Nebra, Nozel, and Acier tread lightly, lest they get dragged into, or end up the victim of their shenanigans. Of all combinations of Silva duos, they are by far the closest. Totally ride or die. That doesn’t mean that they don’t drive each other absolutely batshit crazy, and have some HUGE blowouts that waterlog half the castle, but that’s what siblings do. The nice thing about having each other is that neither of them end up in their siblings’ or mother’s shadows. The not nice thing about that is that they’re just. Little shits. Imagine Noelle acting the way she does in the beginning of the series, but being sincere about it. Imagine Solid acting the way he does, except he’s never checking to see if he’s got his siblings’ approval. Now imagine them patting each other on the back for acting like that. Yikes.
Then Ferro comes along. He’s the result of Solid knocking up his unnamed noble girlfriend when he’s 16-17. Acier is PISSED. All the other Silvas are scandalized. Solid is in big trouble. Acier suspends him from the Silver Eagles while she does damage control. What she eventually ends up doing is paying the girl off, and when the baby is born, she takes him into House Silva to raise him in secret. Nobody outside House Silva ever knows about him. He is House Silva’s best kept secret. This is an important detail.
The coup comes together. Fuegoleon has been working on this plan for a long time. Years. Leopold is on board, because Leopold would follow him off a cliff. But he’s also scared shitless. This is a much bigger deal than stepping on a few comrades to rise through the ranks. He slips a little. Kirsch catches wind of the plan. He gets in Leo’s and Fuego’s ear to remind them, hey, we’re Vermillions, too. So we’re cool, right?
Yeah, they’re cool. All they have to do is help their cousins kill everyone whose last name isn’t Vermillion. Kirsch thinks this is a pretty good deal to save him and his sister. Mimosa will later have her doubts, but we’ll burn that bridge when we come to it.
Meoroleona was invited, but never shows up.
We’re about at the beginning of the show when the coup begins. I don’t have a good reason that it goes off as smoothly as it does. But everyone in Houses Kira and Silva dies, except Acier and Ferro. Ferro, now two, manages to watch his entire family get bodied without getting a scratch on him, because no one anticipated him being there. Acier is only able to defend herself and him before sneaking away.
Acier and Ferro flee to the Forbidden Realm, to a little town in bumfuck nowhere, to hide. They are never discovered by the Vermillions.
Fuegoleon becomes the Clover King. As far as they can tell, the coup is 100% successful. But the thing about fire is that it’s super useful for making people really dead, but when people are dying in heaps and being burned to ash it’s kind of hard to count how many bodies you’ve got. They don’t realize that they’re one short. With no one to stand in their way, Fuegoleon crowns himself Clover King. He disbands the Silver Eagles, and within the next few years, will crown himself Wizard King. It actually becomes pretty easy after Julius nerfs himself, whoops.
Unfortunately, Fuegoleon is starting to unravel. He gained a LOT of enemies doing all this heinous shit, and he is not a beloved king. Leopold is now the head of the Crimson Lion Kings, and he’s reporting back a lot of hostility among the captains. Not that they didn’t expect that, but there’s no way to practice sleeping with one eye open. That’s not to mention that the people are scared and confused, and that doesn’t make for a peaceful kingdom.
Over the course of years, he puts greater and greater restrictions on magic. It starts as permits to use spells in public places and soon grows into a near-total ban on grimoires for anyone outside the magic knights. With absolute power, he can kick people out of the magic knights AND take their grimoires. These rules both ease and exacerbate his growing paranoia. Everyone is pissed, but effectively stripped of their power, there isn’t much they can do about it.
Meanwhile, Acier is raising her grandson as a peasant, but never forgets that they’re royals. She teaches Ferro all of their family history, even though they have to keep it a secret. That gets kind of tricky since Ferro has royal-level magic in the middle of a town of peasants, but, you know, who’s gonna call him on it?
When Ferro is ten, he get recruited by a mysterious hooded figure to train his magic in secret. 90% of his magic training happens in a location he is taken to by a spatial mage. He, along with about a dozen other kids, are trained by a small band of mages who claim to be the resistance. Their goal is simple: Train the next generation of mages to take out the king and restore order to the kingdom. Ferro thinks this is pretty cool, and the honor isn’t lost on him, but he’s mostly glad that he can learn to control his magic in a way that makes his grandmother proud.
By the time Ferro is 15, grimoire ceremonies have been almost completely outlawed, so it’s a big deal when the resistance throws their trainees a grimoire ceremony. Once they’ve received their grimoires, they begin the next leg of their journey: become magic knights.
The Magic Knights Entrance Exam has changed a LOT in the last 15 years. This exam is deadly. In many instances, the point is to kill or be killed. Magic knights are being trained as a military force first and foremost, and their most important feature must be that they take orders unblinkingly. This does not fly with Ferro. While he’s extremely qualified for the position in every other way, he’s too nice to let people die, let alone kill them. He fails the exam. However, some of the other kids he’s trained with make it in.
So he needs a new plan. Spurned on by his grandmother and his teachers through the resistance, he decides to travel the Clover Kingdom. In the midst of his travels, Acier dies. At 20 years old, he is now the last Silva.
This fact makes Ferro pretty fatalistic, and at this point he decides the only rational thing to do is to force an audience with King Fuegoleon. Surely this won’t end in disaster. Definitely won’t be his untimely end by flames.
--
So there are a lot of holes in this AU, because it sprang up around this one character I had a wild dream about. A few mores notes:
Noelle joined the Silver Eagles, if that wasn’t obvious
The Vermillion coup takes place 1-2 years after the start of the show, and I have no explanation for how those events could fit into this timeline. They would definitely look a LOT different, that’s for sure
My notes on this end where they do because at the point where Ferro breaks into the royal castle to force this audience with the king, he actually gets thrown out of this universe and into another. So I guess for all intents and purposes, the Silva line ends for good in this universe
I know exactly where Meoroleona is and what she’s doing
I don’t know where exactly Kirsch and Mimosa are and what they’re doing when they disappear
So that’s all I’ve got! This isn’t a super duper happy AU, and definitely not flattering for everyone, but I was forced to flesh it out because I was told, very emphatically, “Evil Vermillions sexy.” I don’t disagree.
#black clover#nozel silva#noelle silva#nebra silva#solid silva#acier silva#fueogleon vermillion#meoroleona vermillion#leopold vermillion#kirsch vermillion#mimosa vermillion#ferro silva#spinda tea#my art#silver eagles#crimson lions#crimson lion kings#I need a name for this AU#gate babies#ferroverse
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New Years Meme 2020
@arqueete: “This survey is a meme that has been passed around among my friends since back in LJ days. If you want to join in, please consider yourself tagged.”
I used to journal more, and stuff like this is really nice to look back on, because I have terrible memory for life stuff or the passage of time. So here, for future me.
1. What did you do in 2020 that you’d never done before? Uhhhh wear a mask to the grocery store? This was not a groundbreaking year for new experiences.
2. Did you keep your New Years’ resolutions and will you make more for next year? I didn't have any. I don't make any. I mean, sometimes I make them in the vague "I want to focus on this in the future", but I'll already have forgotten by March, like I don't really PLAN my life in such a way. I just have goals that aren't tied to specific points in time. You get there when you get there, and you choose what you want to prioritise.
3. Did anyone close to you give birth? No, but my brother got married, which was very exciting because he's 40 and has never had a girlfriend who he considered important enough for me to meet. (And my sister-in-law is delightful.)
4. Did anyone close to you die? My (half-)brother's dad died a few weeks ago (cancer), but I didn't really know him, so I wouldn't say he was close to me. I did spend almost a week at my brother's place to be there for him though. And honestly, I kept thinking about how my mom's dead this year, because in a way I'm glad we didn't have to deal with this year together. She already died from respitory failure, had poor impulse control and sense of safety, and I would've been CONSTANTLY worried about her.
5. What countries did you visit? I was gonna go to Malaysia (for my brother's wedding celebration), but that didn't happen. (Flatmates were gonna go to Japan.) So. Yeah. Home country all the way.
6. What would you like to have in 2021 that you lacked in 2020? A driving force to move forward in my life?
7. What date from 2020 will remain etched upon your memory, and why? I don't think... that there is one specific day? I guess the US election? Despite me being Norwegian, it's still fairly historic.
8. What was your biggest achievement of the year? /stares blankly at the wall I did do some nice art pieces? I coped? I managed to have good times and make friends despite everything else.
9. What was your biggest failure? I dropped out of two classes specifically because I couldn't do remote learning and self-structured study (BECAUSE ADHD YO), even though it wasn't even that HARD subjects, which was very frustrating. It hasn't set my study plan back, thankfully, but it still felt like a waste.
10. Did you suffer illness or injury? Only mental. And thankfully not as bad as it could've been, but hell yeah there was some strong anxiety in there.
11. What was the best thing you bought? I've bought some great video games this year. Animal Crossing brought 250 hours of fun, Hades brought 100 hours so far. Good investments.
12. Whose behavior merited celebration? // 13. Whose behavior made you appalled and depressed? Both of these are related to pandemic behavior so I think you can guess.
14. Where did most of your money go? Entertainment? Also, god, I spent so much money on theatre tickets that are now just vouchers for non-specific future performances. I'll get my money's worth eventually, but right now it's hundres of dollars worth just sitting in vouchers. OH, and, digital D&D books.
15. What did you get really, really, really excited about? I had tickets for Chess. Several tickets, for multiple performances. STILL HAVEN'T SEEN THIS PRODUCTION THOUGH. But they're still doing it so hopefully it will still happen.
16. What song(s) will always remind you of 2020? Not sure I have any specific ones, actually. No iconic music.
17. Compared to this time last year, are you: Last year I was feeling very accomplished. I was challenging myself, had befriended lots of classmates, had gotten through some stuff I was quite proud of managing. This year has been... not that. But on the other hand, I'm not as exhausted from school stuff, and I'm ready to actually go places and try to do things, as opposed to just wanting a month long nap.
18. What do you wish you’d done more of? General life maintainance stuff. Not just school work, but like, focus more on money sensibility and try to get on disability, go to the dentist, work with my doctor more... All of that got a little bit just... postponed indefinitely.
19. What do you wish you’d done less of? Uh, can't think of any notable negative behaviour. It's mostly stuff I didn't do. Like, I had some bad anxiety in the spring, but honestly I think I did an appropriate amount of worrying.
20. How will you be spending Christmas? Had my first christmas with my flatmates (whom I love very much), and had my dad over as well. It was very lovely, and socially way less draining than usual.
22. Did you fall in love in 2020? lmao I'm aromantic
23. How many one-night stands? lmao I'm asexual
24. What was your favorite TV program? There were a few this year! Good Omens, The Queen's Gambit, Julie and the Phantoms, Avenue 5. There were more I watched and enjoyed, but I think those stand out the most. Also, does Critical Role count? OH, The Baby Sitters Club! A lot of good stuff.
25. Do you hate anyone now that you didn't hate this time last year? Nah. I don't hate a lot of people.
26. What was the best book you read? Don't think I read anything notable this year. Don't read a lot of books, I prefer to consume stories in other media.
27. What was your greatest musical discovery? Julie and the Phantoms. Not because the music is astounding or anything, but it was very feel-good and fun. Don't think I had a lot of new music.
28. What did you want and get? D&D campaigns? Have gotten really invested in one of them in particular, it's delightful.
29. What was your favorite film of this year? Hmmm. The only one that stands out was The Old Guard. I watch more series than films. 2 hours isn't long enough for me to get properly invested AND satisfied.
31. What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you? I turned 33 and I don't know that I did anything special. I think I just chilled? Flatmates made me a nice breakfast!
32. What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying? Having the energy for essays/exams, probably. Just feeling like I actually had some accomplishments. OR LIKE. If Norway did like New Zealand and just wiped the virus out.
33. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2020? Pyjamas. Occasionally 'apocalypse chic'.
34. What kept you sane? My flatmates and my dad. Reliable social interaction with people I care about.
35. Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most? Matthew McNulty, which applies to every single year. But this year I started both a gallery website and a discord server for him, so it was a particularly good year for him. (Special mention to Paul Spera, who I finally talked to face-to-face, through Zoom, but still.) Also I'm using 'fancy' platonically.
36. What political issue stirred you the most? Ha aha hah all of them, oh god. BLM, probably, though. That was when I still had the energy to get invested.
37. Who did you miss? So many people. Like, come on. I don't know that it was even specific people so much just... being in a group? Like, my choir gang?
38. Who was the best new person you met? Met a guy I ended up playing a LOT of board games with. We haven't really talked in a few months now tho. And there's a friend I didn't MEET this year, but I really connected with, who's also now my DM, which was really nice.
39. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2020: It's not necessarily new knowledge, but this year has really driven home the need for both community solidarity and governmental support/leadership.
40. Quote a song lyric that sums up your year: I'm alone in my apartment, that means I can do anything / I'm not wearing pants (alone in my apartment - Brian David Gilbert)
Summary: It's been a conflicted year, a lot has felt like it's been on stand-still, but there's still been some good things in there.
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“Enthusiastic Sobriety programs tearing families apart and convincing parents to kick their kids out onto the streets.” Originally posted on OnTheEmmis.com in 2004. ICECAP is the former incorporation and has since dissolved due to the efforts of OnTheEmmis.com
There is a thread on the other message board that I think the parents need to be informed about. This is about the harm that is caused to the children from parents that are still in an ICECAP program. These are true stories (not edited) just copied and pasted for you to read.
What Bob AND Joy teach parents about "tough" love and their version of "unconditional" love are just that "their version".
Does this seem as though families are being brought together and healing to you?
This is a great example of the pain that is caused when one person in the family (the child) wants to leave ICECAP and another person (the parent) believes the lies that they have been taught (that they are or will get high, can't live without being in the program, etc.) They, ICECAP, breed the fear that you as a parent have when you see them making choices that YOU don't like. What is the true meaning of letting go? Or the true meaning of unconditional love?
This is not to make any parent feel guilty for their time in an ICECAP program. I truly believe you thought you were doing the best thing. You were also a victim of the cult and it's way of thinking. That is the very reason I am posting this thread. To show the harm and hopefully save some pain for others.
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Author:
Bailey [ Next Thread | Previous Thread | Next Message | Previous Message ]
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Date Posted: 13:27:44 12/22/04 Wed
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Getting kicked out of your house by your once all loving supporting do anything for you family
As most of you know my family is ALL involved in Crossroads and sense I've left its been hell, Thursday night my dad and step mom freaked out on me and my dad started pushing me and threatening to "lay me the fuck out" My dad has never so much as spanked me before we used to get along great until x-roads we got high together went to concerts movies dinner and what not, But now its as tho i don’t exist to them they call me ungrateful bitch and many other names after all that happened he told me to pack a bag and he didn't want to see me anymore, Luckily i see a therapist and he talked to my dad and calmed them down they still want me out of the house tho. I cant leave now because i belong to the state until me 18th birthday which thank god isn't far off but if they kick me out or i move out i have to spend the next month and half in juvenile again, this has happened to many of my friends who have left too they end up homeless because if there not in the group they cant be at there house, i was just wondering if anyone else's parents went crazy after they left and if it does get better?
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[> Subject: It happened to me Part 1
Author:
Hollywood
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Date Posted: 17:59:18 12/22/04 Wed
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I lived threw this every time I left the group, but especially the last time.
The last time I left I bailed the group with a guy, I knew from prior experiences that my parents would not tolerate me living in their house and not be in Pathway. So I did what I knew how to do, and hopped on a bus to California. When we got there we had no money or anything. At that point and many points throughout my time in Pathway I was willing to be a street person rather than be involved in the group. To say it didn't last long was an understatement; he was scared and refused to talk to anyone. His parents agreed to fly us back to AZ. I almost did not go because I knew that upon arriving I would have no place to go. Mind you at this point I had over a year sober. I did not bail because I wanted to get high.
When the plane touched down in PHX he had people from the group waiting to take him back. They shunned me. I had been in the group for about 5 years at that point and they could care less if I had a place to go. I now know it was because my parents would not shell out even more money for me to go into IOP (that would have been the third time).
I truly did not know who to call; I had been in the group since I was 14 years old. Not many people I knew had left and were around or willing to talk to a program drop out.
I finally gathered enough courage to call a friend of mine that had left the group, I knew she was getting high but at that point I didn't care. The streets of Phoenix were a lot more cruel than the streets of Hollywood. Her mother answered the phone, she did not sound very happy to hear my voice, on a previous runaway trip I bailed the group with her daughter and a few other people and we stole her credit cards and over $1000 dollars cash if my memory serves correctly. So this was a lady that I had fucked over to say the least. This kind woman opened her home to me. More than what my own family was capable of at that point. She allowed me to stay at their house and helped me try and find a job. At the same time unknown to me she was in contact with my parents trying to convince them to take me home, that I was actually doing fine and wasn't what the group was telling them about me.
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[> [> Subject: Re: It happened to me Part 2
Author:
Hollywood
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Date Posted: 18:00:08 12/22/04 Wed
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For some reason on Christmas Eve my parents called and told me I could move back in, but I had to live in the garage. They would set up a cot in there. I would not be allowed to use anything in the house, except the bathroom but my parents had to escort me to and from it. I agreed I didn't care; I just wanted to see my father.
When we were driving to my parents house the kind mom who allowed me to stay at her house explained to me that this was all my mothers doing, my father wanted nothing to do with my and had informed her that I was dead to him. It was because of him I would be sleeping in the garage until I could find my own home (mind you I was 18 and had never held down a job, paid bills, etc.) I lost it, this man, my father, my hero wanted nothing to do with me. This was a turning point for me. This is when I decided in my crazy still experiencing the effects of Kool-Aid that I needed to get high in order to get in the house. Because, try and follow this it is way crazy thinking looking back, if I just got high I would have something to cop to, the group would take me back, I could make amends and therefore my father would allow me in his life again. Crazy I know.
Well living in the garage lasted about 2 hours before my parents (read mother) got sick of it. My father sulked in his room and wanted nothing to do with me. Christmas Eve with all the family and Christmas day were rather awkward, to say the least. My father still did not speak to me. I believe that year they even attended the round robin. I sat at home. I soon got a job and almost immediately began getting high, smoking speed, snorting coke, and shooting heroin. This went on for about 2 years. I worked therefore my parents didn't care. They had both left the program (details of that have never been disclosed to me, I do not know why or how). And my father and my relationship finally started to re solidify.
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[> [> [> Subject: Re: It happened to me Part 2
Author:
Hollywood
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Date Posted: 18:01:09 12/22/04 Wed
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Except by this time I was strung out on heroin. Believe it or not I did go back to the group. After my parents discovered my horrible habit and asked me to check myself in to a detox center, I made an appointment with the then OG counselor. He told me to that I was going to die, that I needed to go into some Step something or other. I told him I had no money. He told me to sell my cars, I told him he was on crack my parents would never let me do that. At the same moment I was absolutely terrified they would. I told him to call them and if he could convince them I was willing. From what I understand that counselor did call my father and my father told him he was full of shit. That was the day my father became my hero again and not some brain washed ego maniac. I wound up getting off heroin a few months later. My father and my relationship has been wonderful ever since, for Christ sake we even work together. My mother is still struggling with the fact that I drink . But her and my relationship is better than it ever has been my entire life.
Sorry this was so long and detailed I never knew I would share all of this. I hope this helps you to realize to hear that some else has been threw a similar nightmare.
Good luck and if you ever need anything or need to talk about the ‘rents and the evil things they can do when they are still slugging down the Kool-Aid but you are not, email me. I am more then willing to listen.
Also if a parent reads this who is considering throwing their child out on to the streets because they are no longer in the group, let me tell them from being that child: They have no place to go! The situation that they are in worsens, they feel abandoned, and the people that they turn to are usually using drugs much heavier than they are or ever have!
PLEASE DO NOT BUY INTO ICECAPS TOUGH LOVE- this is what killed Bob’s son, this is what almost killed me, and what almost killed or even did kill many people I knew.
Hollywood
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[> Subject: Re: Did this happen to anyone else
Author:
michele
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Date Posted: 22:27:49 12/22/04 Wed
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ok bailey, i know you've already heard this but there are some who haven't... the first time i left stl i was 16. i lived on the streets and 20 dollar hotels and at my old sponsee's house. it was bad but didn't compare to when i left atl. that time i was 18. my dad had driven a car down for me. i eventually got myself kicked out. i knew it was coming. i packed up my car with at much crap as i could and then i left. i went to stl then kc. stealing gas the entire way, oh yeah and wrote a bunch of bad checks. i had to go back down to atl to pick up more of my stuff. so i took a friend with me. i got there and packed up more crap. i made it all the way back up to nashville, then my car broke down. to anyone who lives in there car it's the most important thing to you. it's your bed, your transportation, your only way to and from work. it makes your whole life work. my friend's parents wired her money and left me 60 miles south of nashville, in manchester. i took what i could from my car and started walking. i hitch hiked from there to kc. it took me 3 days almost. i looked like complete shit when i got home. think the garage is bad? my mom made me sleep on the back deck for 3 weeks. like a dog. i woke up went to work (walked my happy ass) came home and then when my mom got home from work she would let me in to go to the bathroom and shower, then i got kicked back out. when i finally proved my self she let me in the house. well that's the most important parts i guess. there's more but i wanna go to sleep. point is that things did get better. i just had to fight so hard for it. i've never had to fight for anything harder then to survive. but i'm still here. and to everyone who will ask, i never touched a truck driver, and they never asked. actually the fed me and let me sleep.
[> Subject: Re: Did this happen to anyone else
Author:
Jen from AZ
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Date Posted: 02:27:25 12/23/04 Thu
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It's stuff like this that really gets me riled! It bothers me that the "Family" (talk about dysfunctional families!) pushes parents to treat their own flesh and blood like animals! I'm sorry - but tough love is bullshit! As parents, we are to care for our kids - whether we love them or not - they are a gift from God and these parents ought to be damn grateful that they have children! Do these parents not realize that there are LAWS about this?! As long as their kid is under 18 they are required BY LAW to give their kids food, clothing and shelter. Parents, if you are kicking your kids out of your house - YOU DON'T DESERVE TO HAVE THEM!
I will NEVER turn my back on my child! I don't understand how any parent can do that! How can a parent look Their child in the eye - no matter how old they are - and turn their back on them? How can they sleep at night not knowing if their child is dead or alive? How can Bob and "friends" push this kind of treatment?! This is just totally beyond my comprehension! My blood is boiling right now!
I would give ANYTHING to have more kids at home! I cry almost every night because I want a houseful of children! Yes, I love my son with all my heart - but yes! I also want a houseful of laughing - hell, even screaming - children running around! And quite frankly it fucking pisses me off that parents treat their children like this! Sleeping in the fucking garage? On the damn patio!? Wake up you parents who are in ICECAP! I don't care if you believe the Bible or not - I do and I believe it with all my heart and it says in there that "whatever you do to the least of these, you have done to me". Guess what parents! When you treat your kids like this, you are treating God like that! I pity you! I pity the fact that one day you will have to answer for the way you have treated your kids! And I pray that you get the justice you deserve!
Sorry webmasters for going off and for using the language I used. I haven't talked like this in years, but this is a hot button for me. I get into a lot of trouble when I'm out and about in stores and see a parent yelling and/or cursing at their child. One of these days I'm probably going to get punched - but I will not keep silent! The treatment that ICECrAP pushes parents to do to their kids is abuse - pure and simple! And I refuse to hold my tongue when I see it going on!
To those of you who are experiencing this treatment or have in the past - please know that I am thinking of you and praying for things to change. Especially that your parents wake up and seek your forgiveness for the treatment they have given you! NOTHING a child does - NOTHING - warrants throwing your kids out on the streets! The atrocities that are out there... it just makes me shudder! And want to scream and rip out Bob's eyes with my bare hands. Not much gets me this worked up.
#bob meehan#meehan#enthusiastic sobriety#clint stonebraker#enthusiastic sobriety programs#enthusiastic sobriety abuse#homelessness#homeless#troubled teen industry#parents#buyer beware#troubled teen#cult#cult survivor#believe survivors#2004#discussion#the insight program#the crossroads program#the cornerstone program#the pathway program#the full circle program#family#breaking code silence
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