#but no coming of age is all sex shit because children according to adults dont have real issues

[timeisacephalopod]

I saw a post the other day that kinda pushed back on the way all coming of age movies are about sexuality and all high school stories basically center around who wants to fuck who and how that's like. Not really all coming of age and high school stories should offer since you know. Youth isn't about who you have a crush on and probably coming of age stories in particular should be far more diverse in subject matter than they are.

Honestly as someone who, when I was 'coming of age' age, hated coming of age stories and still do for the exact reason listed above (see the weird scene in It where we all sexualize a 13 year old girl because boys have crushes and surely there's no other way to portray this than feeling a child up with a camera to demonstrate boys have ~feelings~ Bev gets no equivalent scene because she's the object of affection rather than the subject feeling desire) I also wish there was diversity in those stories. And coming of age stories about adults- we don't stop going through huge life moments that change everything forever, but back to kids. When I was a kid I could have desperately used a coming of age story where the character has a sick and dying parent who does die by the end of the story and what happens after that. Granted I did just fine without it, but even without being asexual it's always irked me that coming of age stories don't seem to appreciate that kids have way larger problems and way better stories to tell then first crushes and first kisses for shit sake give kids who went through what I did as a kid some kind of story about what happens when your parent gets cancer and how complicated that is and stop assuming the biggest thing that happens around puberty is discovering sexuality that, if you were queer, you probably already noticed what you felt wasn't in a coming of age story anyway.

[this-brownie]

05.14.20

I recently read Lolita, written by Vladimir Nabokov and I have a LOT of thoughts on it. I know it’s considered such a classic, but the plot revolves around pedophilia and, therefore, was very confused by all the hype surrounding it. I decided to finally read it so that I could form a valid opinion on it.

It felt like there was no 'point' to the story or that I had somehow missed it. I read the author’s note that said there is no moral to the story and people looking for one are wasting their time. So I tried to do some research on it online to see what others have said- some people talked about how beautifully it's written and what a good job he did since he's a Russian writer and this was one of his first books in English. I thought about that-- his voice/style IS engaging, however I was utterly bored reading about the actual content, if that makes sense. The narrator/pedo would basically talk shit about these other characters for three literal pages and then MOVE ON and never. mention. them. again. I'm like...wtf was the point of that?! A lot of people called the book really funny and I was like uhhhh I didn't laugh NOT ONCE throughout the whole fucking thing. Some people said the book was amazing bc at the core of it, its a """"""loveeeee"""""" story like the fuck kind of love are you people used to?! It's literally about the descpicable narrator who.. TRIGGER WARNING ***lusts over girls ages 9-14, pursues a "relationship" with (I mean assaults) his 12yo stepdaughter, fucking bribes her w money, emotionally manipulates her (by telling her that if she goes to the police she will be taken away and will be alone forever, and wouldn't it just be better to stay with him), and abuses her daily. On top of that he acts like he's her bf and acts jealous when she starts talking to guys her age! Multiple, multiple fucking times the girl says "yeah well you raped me so the least you can do is give me money/give me this/that". She is aware that she's being taken advantage of, and attempts to exert her own agency in the matter, however she can. He sexualizes her like an object and talks about her in cringey ways like he literally says "oh this beautiful 7th grader, oh the lovely girl-child, the 12 year old with the boxy boyish torso" like ew. Why are you so obsessed with prepubescent bodies**** So fucking pathetic. And you know what? People claim that he's just hopelessly in love bc he DOES talk about her in a loving way (yeah whatever creep) but throughout the entire he book he literally ogles other children. How is that fucking love?! Just bc he found the ONE girl who was actually receptive to his disgusting behavior? Lolita is interesting for people who don’t know how to relate to real people, so they read this book about a pedophile and feel cool for “understanding” him. He’s not likable— he’s self deprecating which people enjoy because instead of having to call him disgusting, he does it to himself and it makes readers sympathize with him. They can therefore "relate" to him since we all love a self hating hero. A lot of people say that it shows us the selfish part of us, that we are willing to do whatever we need to in order to pursue what we want. That we are ultimately narcissists. Yeah maybe men feel that fucking entitled (sorry I'm being sexist) . What fucking responsible adult is willing to ruin and manipulate a child just to fulfill his own depraved fantasies? Because he succeeds in acquiring this little girl, are we supposed to applaud him? Call him smart and badass and a go getter?! He's delusional. When men read the book they relate to the narrator. And when women read it, who do you think they relate to? The female character, the girl ofc-- how to be kept in a helpless situation, keep taking abuse, and to be manipulated into staying. 

I may be looking at this book and analyzing it from a very cultural lens but isn't that the point of a classic? That it transcends time, culture, whatever society you're coming from, whatever perspective you have — it’s supposed to be relatable. In the book, the narrator/pedo brings up all the historical relationships of child brides and little girls being sexualized and he's like "it wasn't wrong then" blah blah I'm like motherfucker, have you considered that we have come away from those times for a fucking reason?! When child marriages were legal, and wherever they still are, it’s not because it isn't an absolutely horrible thing. It is just socially acceptable and that's why people dont speak up about it. When people DO try to speak up about it, they are shunned which leads to others holding their silence on it. I mean, slavery was once legal too.

Oh and another sad thing was that so many readers online were saying that yeah he knows he has a problem, but he really does love her, and what about her?! It's not like she's innocent either (bc how dare she have sex once before, as an experiment)— so basically that makes this 12yo equivalent to this 45 fucking year old manipulative, delusional, pathetic abuser. I think Nabokov also purposely portrayed the girl as extra bratty and insolent bc he didn’t want his readers to see her as innocent or child like in anyway. By making her unlikable, readers begin to sympathize even more for the pedo. People are fucking wild yo, to what extent they are willing to forgive grown ass men and blame little girls. Side note, it's not that I particularly care for the girl character, but I could see through how she was being manipulated and how badly she was trying to escape (she finally does thankfully). My opinion is that if this were a real love story, people would not have given it a second look-- fuck what they say about Nabokov’s writing, it’s BS. Ultimately, my thoughts on it are that people like the book bc they like the authors writing style OR bc they think they're fucking edgy for liking such a controversial book. They probably feel cool that they have gotten through such a taboo/challenging topic without feeling complete disgust for the book and themselves. Multiple articles online have said “if you don’t like the book/are not open to reading it, it’s bc you’re narrow minded and can’t put yourself in uncomfortable positions” like stfuuuuu. They argue that just bc it’s from a wrong/taboo perspective, it’s not enough of a reason to stop you from reading it. They compared it by saying if a murderer wrote a book, is it not worth reading bc murder is wrong? And I understand the argument but that really diminishes the point. The murderer isn't being romanticized; it is pretty clear they are unstable and that we SHOULD NOT BE LIKE THEM.  A person reading about a book that glorifies murder won’t necessarily go out and commit murder. Similarly, a person reading about sexual abuse/rape/pedophilia won’t go out and commit those things, but unfortunately by calling the book beautiful, and the idea compelling, and blaming the victim, you’ve now normalized the idea a little more. You’ve humanized the abuser and made his actions a little bit more acceptable. And that’s where the problem lies. Should a book like this have NOT been written? I wouldn’t jump to that. But the weird, obsessive fascination over it is definitely concerning. And what could have been done differently, anyway? The narrator is already ‘aware’ of his problem and constantly calls himself disgusting. Nabokov doesn’t regret writing it (and why should he, he’s made a ton of fame and money off of it). Having a disclaimer that says “rape is wrong” would be treated like a fucking joke. It’s really up to society and how they feel about it, which is the same as how society has always felt about girls/women. Nothing good. One other thing I came across is that a lot of young women (who ‘should’ hate the book, according to the article) actually really like it. I find that misguided. I know I am judging so hard here but- I feel that these women are the same ones that say they don’t need feminism and they are stuck on this boring ass yet ubiquitous trope of powerful/older/experienced men courting the innocent, dainty yet (somehow still) seductive girl. Have seen that idea MANY fucking times. Yawn. It might appeal to a high schooler but not people who can have two simultaneous thoughts in their brains. My friend Marisol brought up an interesting and valid point about this; she said that some women may have enjoyed the book because “they have been victims of [sexual abuse] and by glorifying something like that, they might subconsciously be convincing themselves that it wasn't as bad and that they're not actually victims of these horrendous crimes”. Lastly, I WILL give the author one credit (no matter how minor)— he doesn’t word the sex/rape scenes in an erotic way. I’m sure there’s a lot of people curious about reading this book cuz they think they will discover soft porn. They will be left feeling disappointed or unaffected after finishing it, which in a way is annoying as well bc youve glazed through and normalized the horror of it without feeling anything. And what’s the point of writing a book? Isn’t it supposed to make you feel? 

Thank you for taking the time to read my rant.

[seethroughtheveil]

WHO ARE WE??? AND DO WE CARE??

WHO ARE WE WHEN WE TRY TO DECODE OURSELVES, WHEN WE ANALYSE OURSELVES, OBJECTIVELY. BECAUSE IN THIS TECH DOMINATED WORLD OF OURS, WHERE SOCIAL MEDIA IS THE NEW FIGHTING RING, WHERE SOCIAL MEDIA HAS BECOME A PLATFORM WHERE PEOPLE SEEM TO TAKE OUT THEIR LIFE’S FRUSTRATIONS OVER THE OTHER PEOPLE BECAUSE THEY FEEL THE OTHER PERSON MADE SOME OFFENSIVE COMMENTS. 

I UNDERSTAND IF SOMEONE IS TRYING TO INCITE VIOLENCE, BUT OTHER THAN THAT EVERY PERSON HAS A RIGHT TO THEIR OWN OPINION AS LONG AS IT IS NOT HARMING ANY OTHER PERSON IN ANY WAY. FEELINGS ARE, WELL FEELINGS, THEY ARE PERSONAL, THEY COME FROM A CONDITIONED MINDSET FROM WHICH WE HAVE UNDERSTOOD THAT DIFFERENT THOUGHTS INCITE DIFFERENT PEOPLE IN THEIR OWN WAY. THERE ARE SO MANY PEOPLE THAT TALK SHIT ALL DAY LONG BUT THE WHOLE COMMUNITY DOES��NT COME TO THEIR DOORSTEP AND SHOUT SLOGANS AGAINST THEM RIGHT??JUST BECAUSE THEY SAID SOMETHING , IT IS MOSTLY BECAUSE MANY PEOPLE COULD’NT CARE LESS ABOUT WHAT SOMEONE FEELS ABOUT A CERTAIN THING.

IF WE’RE TALKING ABOUT OFFENSIVE THINGS BEING SAID, ITS NOT EVEN IN THE TOP 10 LIST OF THINGS TO BE TAKEN CARE OF. EVERYBODY GETS ANGRY AND ALL MORALLY CORRECT WHEN SOMETHING IS TRENDING, SOMETHING IS IN THE LIME LIGHT AND OPINIONS ARE HELD AS THE HIGHEST FORM OF CONTEXT. THERE ARE HUNDREDS AND THOUSANDS OF THINGS THAT ARE TO BE LOOKED INTO.

WHAT DO PEOPLE CARE ABOUT???WHAT DOES EVERYONE CARE ABOUT?? 

THE WORLD HAS MORE THAN 800 MILLION PEOPLE LIVING IN HUNGER, AND THIS WAS A STATISTIC GIVEN IN 2018. NOW WITH THE LOCKDOWN , A FOOD CRISIS IS EXPECTED WHEN THERE IS ONE ANYWAYS GOING ON FOR SO LONG. CAN YOU IMAGINE SO MUCH OF THE WORLD’S POPULATION LIVING IN HUNGER. THESE PHILANTHROPISTS TALK ABOUT MAKING THE WORLD BETTER AND DOING THIS AND GETTING BETTER CONNECTIVITY TO EVERYONE. THERE ISN’T ENOUGH FOOD REACHING SO MANY PLACES, FOOD IS WASTED IN TONS AND TONS EVERYDAY. THE MOST BASIC BASIC ASPECT OF OUR LIVING IS MISSING TO SO MANY. TO CHILDREN, SMALL LITTLE CHILDREN WHO ARE BORN MALNOURISHED , LIVE THEIR SMALL LIFE MALNOURISHED AND DIE IN A SHORT WHILE, DUE TO LACK OF NUTRITION AND NO FOOD. 

A CHILD WHO WE REVERE AS AN INNOCENT SOUL WITH PURITY IN THEIR HEART AND NOTHING ELSE, WHO WE DEEM AS BEING UNTOUCHED FROM SOCIETY AND BEING MORE PRESENT IN THEIR LIFE THAN ANYBODY ELSE, IS LEFT TO DIE, IS IGNORED TO DIE, IS DELIBERATELY HIDDEN FROM THE PEOPLE AND LEFT TO DIE, WITH THOUSANDS AND MILLION OTHERS JUST LIKE THAT. WE PUSH THE GRAPHIC VIDEO OF AN EX-CON BEING CHOKED TO DEATH, THE FULL 9 MINUTES OF IT, WE ARE NOT GIVEN THE WHOLE PICTURE, SOMETHING SEEMED VERY FISHY AND THE WORLD WENT INTO AN UPROAR, NOT THAT HIS LIFE DIDN’T MATTER BUT WHAT HIS DEATH HAS BEEN MADE INTO.

IMAGINE SHOWING MILLIONS OF PEOPLE LIVING IN HUNGER, JUST LIKE THE COVID COUNTS THEY START SHOWING PEOPLE DYING OF HUNGER IN THE THOUSANDS, IMAGINE THAT, WOULD PEOPLE WAKE UP??WOULD PEOPLE BE IN UPROAR?? OR DO WE JUST PRETEND TO CARE? WHEN IT IS CONVENIENT AND ACCORDING TO THE SITUATION. DO WE NOT KNOW HOW MUCH OF THE WORLD POPULATION IS LIVING IN HUNGER??? OR ARE WE SO DISTRACTED INTENTIONALLY OR UNINTENTIONALLY THAT WE CHOOSE TO NOT SEE WHAT IS REALLY HAPPENING. IF THESE PEOPLE REALLY CARED, WOULDN'T THEY HAVE GONE OUT OF THEIR WAY AND MAYBE TRY TO FEED THE HUNGRY?? TO NOT LET CHILDREN DIE ???AS THEY JUSTIFY VACCINES WITH THE MOTIVE OF PREVENTING CHILDREN TO CONTRACT DISEASES. WOULD’NT THEY HAVE TAKEN LIABILITY OF THEIR MISTAKES?? WOULDN'T THEY HAVE SEEN THAT CHILDREN ARE DYING???

FROM HUMAN SEX TRAFFICKING, DEADLY MEDICINES, TOXIC FOOD, HIGHLY TOXIC CHEMICALS EVERYWHERE AROUND US, CHILDREN ARE DYING OF THAT TOO RIGHT???BUT WHAT THEIR SOLUTION IS TO PROTECT THEM FROM A VIRUS THAT IS ALMOST 0 PERCENT DEADLY TO CHILDREN AND YOUNG ADULTS. 

DEAR FELLOW HUMAN BEINGS MOST OF THE PEOPLE THAT LIVE IN HORRIBLE CONDITIONS, IN PLACES OF CONFLICT, IN SITUATIONS WHERE LIFE AND DEATH IS A DAY TO DAY ROUTINE, WHERE CHILDREN ARE BEING ABUSED EVERYDAY, HELD CAPTIVE, WHERE PEOPLE DON’T HAVE ANY FREEDOM, WHERE GANG RULE IS THE RULE AND WHERE THERE IS NO FOOD, WHERE THEY WORK IN CONDITIONS WHICH ARE SO HAZARDOUS TO THEIR HEALTH THAT THEY DON’T EVEN REACH THE AGE OF 50 AND THEY DIE, WHERE CHILDREN ARE MADE TO WORK FOR HOURS AND HOURS AT A TIME FOR A VERY MINUTE PAY AND HORRIBLE CONDITIONS, THEY DON’T CARE ABOUT THIS SHITTY VIRUS, THEY COULDN’T GIVE A THOUGHT TO IT IN THEIR TIME. 

AND THE PEOPLE WHO ARE SUPPORTING THESE VERY DRACONIAN MEASURES ARE THE SOME OF THE PEOPLE THAT ARE INVOLVED IN ALMOST ALL THE ABOVE MENTIONED ACTIVITIES. ALL YOU GOTTA DO IS RESEARCH A LITTLE, WHERE YOU CAN FIND HOW MANY CHILDREN AND ADULTS GO MISSING EACH YEAR, HOW MANY DIE OF MEDICAL MALPRACTICE, HOW MANY DIE OF HUNGER, HOW MANY DIE IN CONFLICT ZONES, HOW MANY DIE OF CHEMICAL HARM FROM INDUSTRIES AND SUCH, HOW MANY DIE OF SUICIDE , OF HOMICIDE, HOW MANY DIE IN CAR ACCIDENTS, FROM ACCIDENTAL OVERDOSE TO SIDE EFFECTS OF DRUGS. THE LIST IS ENDLESS AND IT SEEMS LIKE IT REMAINS TO BE ENDLESS EVEN IN THE NEAR FUTURE. NIKE AND MANY BIG MANUFACTURERS LIKE APPLE AND SUCH MAY STAY IN THE LIMELIGHT FOR THE RIGHT REASONS, BUT SOMEWHERE SOME PEOPLE KNOW WHAT THEY ARE, HOW EVIL THEY ARE AND HOW INCONSIDERATE THEY ARE, FOR REASONS THAT ARE HIDDEN IN PLAIN SIGHT. 

THAT IS WHY EVERYTHING THAT YOU SEE THROWN EVERYWHERE AROUND IS A HOAX, MIND CONTROL, LIKE A REMOTE, CONTROLLING HOW ONE FEELS, HOW ONE IS MADE TO REACT AND SHOWN WHAT AND WHEN. A VERY SYSTEMATIC APPROACH TO IT IS PUT, TO PUSH THE RIGHT BUTTONS LETS SAY, AND KEEP EVERYONE DISTRACTED TO NOT SEE WHAT THE REAL ISSUES ARE, TO NOT TURN BACK AND SEE WHAT THE PEOPLE CONTROLLING THE NARRATIVE ARE REALLY DOING, TO MAKE SURE THAT THEIR PURE EVIL PERSONA IS KEPT HIDDEN ALWAYS AND THOSE WHO COME OUT WITH IT ARE SILENCED.

THERE ARE THOUSANDS OF ISSUES AT HAND, AMAZINGLY OVERWHELMING FOR SURE, BUT ONE THING THAT EVERY RELIGION, EVERY CULTURE, EVERY TRADITION AND EVERY HUMAN BEING FOLLOWS OR ,MOSTLY FOLLOWS IS TO FEED THE HUNGRY, IS TO NOT LET SOMEONE DIE OF HUNGER, TO NOT DENY SOMEONE WATER. 

THE PEOPLE WHO WANT YOU TO BELIEVE THEY CARE(ANYWAYS IS A RED FLAG IN THE BEGINNING) REALLY WANT YOU TO BELIEVE THAT, FOR A REASON, BECAUSE THE VERY VERY HARD AND TRUE FACT IS THAT THEY DONT. THEY DONT CARE ABOUT ANYONE EXCEPT THEIR OWN AGENDA’S , THEIR OWN IDEOLOGIES AND THEIR OWN BELIEFS, JUST LIKE MOST PEOPLE DO IN THEIR LIVES, WANTING TO GET PEOPLE ON THEIR SIDE, TO WANT THE PEOPLE WORKING FOR OR UNDER YOU TO THINK THE WAY YOU DO , TO BE THE WAY YOU WANT THEM TO AND TO NOT QUESTION YOU, NOW TAKE THIS TO THE HIGHEST LEVEL AND GIVE THEM UNLIMITED POWER, THAT IS WHAT THESE PEOPLE ARE, SELFISH PSYCHOPATHS, WHO COULD’NT CARE LESS ABOUT HUMANITY.  

THOSE WHO CAN BE SOMETHING AND WANT TO BE SOMETHING, I HOPE WE CHOOSE TO BE KIND FIRST AND THEN GO ABOUT OUR LIFE.