#teenreader

[redroomreflections]

A Fleeting Moment

Note: This is an AU of the AU. This is using Sixteen Candles characters but it’s does not have any affiliation or connection to the storylines and drabbles. It’s completely au. 

FOR MY ANON BESTIE

Read sixteen candles here on a03

Warning: breastfeeding and a bit of age regression from Bunny. Spanking (not done by Nat/Wanda) and child abuse in general. Also mentions of SA by a minor. 

Bunny can pinpoint the moment like a location on a map. She can remember the first time she hid within herself, protecting what was left of her sanity, for the sake of staying alive. When she was nine years old her father died. She got the news on a Wednesday afternoon. She slid into the backseat of her mother’s car, wondering why her older sister was driving when she noticed the tense mood. She sat back in her seat, watching the trees go by, as they drove. She was silent the entire way home. The somber feeling of the car unsettled her. She walked into her home with excitement. Her teacher stuffed her very first report card of the year into her backpack and she wanted to show them. She struggled with math and her dad stayed up with her some nights to help her. He never got angry with her or yelled at her. He simply found the tools to help her thrive. She was more than ready to show him the fruits of their labor. She raced into the kitchen first, her backpack slapping against her back, as she searched for her parents. She skidded to a comical stop as she saw her mother bent over the counter, her older sister, Brie, holding her mother in her arms as she cried. 

“Mommy,” Bunny asked. She stepped around her sister to tug at her mother’s shirt. “Mommy, are you okay?” Sherry looked down at her with tears in her eyes. She was distraught and hurt. Bunny, having never seen her mother so upset, wanted nothing more than to make it better. 

“No, baby, I’m not okay.” Sherry sniffled. She wiped at her eyes before grabbing onto Bunny's arms. She looks into her eyes. His eyes. “Your daddy. He was sick.” 

“Sick how?” Bunny tilts her head. 

“Your daddy had cancer, baby,” Sherry continues. She swallows thickly. 

“Like the bald kids in the commercial?” She questions and Sherry nods. “So he’s getting medicine from the doctor, right? They can make it better.” 

For a moment Sherry wants to smile at her daughter’s innocence. She wants to cry at having this conversation with her daughter. 

“No, y/n, they can’t make it better.” Sherry doesn’t know the right thing to say. She doesn’t know how to tell her daughter that her father, her husband, stopped his treatments because he was in too much pain. He hid it from her to allow her to enjoy as much of her childhood as she could. “They can’t make it better this time. Daddy passed away. He’s not coming back.” Bunny’s lips curled, her chin quivered, and her tears fell as she cried silently. She leaned into her mother, reveling in the feel of Sherry’s arms, as the words sunk in. 

“He promised,” Bunny whispered into her mother’s shoulder. “He promised he would take me to the game. I don’t even like it but I can like it for him.” Bunny pulled back. “Tell him. I’ll sit and I won’t ask to leave and I won’t go to the bathroom too many times. Please, tell him.”

Sherry’s shoulder shook as she tried to keep in her sobs. “I can’t tell him, baby. I can’t. He’s gone.” Faster than she can react, Bunny pulls away from her mother. She runs up the stairs and into her parent’s bedroom. She searches far and low for the man in question only to come up empty. His side of the bed is perfectly made. His shoes still standing next to his dresser. His wallet is on the nightstand. Bunny comes over to the nightstand. His wedding ring sits on the dresser right next to the rest of his belongings. She only wants to touch it. To feel him with her. She takes a hold of the rings to turn over in her hands. 

He promised. 

A week later, the funeral has come and gone. Bunny has said goodbye to her father. She sits patiently in the living room of her home as people enter and exit. No one pays too much attention to her as they mingle and talk amongst themselves. Most of them glance at her and whisper. She knows what they’re saying. 

He dind’t tell her. No one told her. 

She was clueless as can be up until a week ago. She never knew her father was sick. She resents all of them for not telling her. She misses him. His smile. The way his eyes would crinkle whenever he was amused by something. She misses the way he smelled. The way he always brought joy into their lives. Bunny picks at her simple black dress. Her hair is pinned into a tight ponytail at the base of her head. Her shoes, black Mary Jane shoes, top off the outfit. She’s dressed so perfectly wehn everything inside of her feels like a mess. She stands from the couch to find her mother. Sherry is in her bedroom, surrounded by her older sisters, when Bunny enters. She’s crying to herself, as the other girls try and comfort her. 

“Hey, go downstairs and play with the other kids,” Brie instructs. 

“I want to be with Mommy,” Bunny ignores her to come and stand next to her mother. “Mommy, can I stay here?” Sherry simply looks at her and crumples. She turns away from the little girl to cry into her hands. 

“Go, Bunny, she’s not in the mood.” Brie tries again. 

“She hasn’t talked to me all week,” Bunny says defiantly. “I just want to sit with her. She’s my Mama too.” She stands with her arms folded. What used to be a way to annoy her siblings seems to do even worse. Brie doesn’t react. She simply stands there. 

“Go,” Sherry says in a hushed tone. “Go to your room, go outside, go sit down. I don’t care just please go.” She says. Bunny’s heart drops. She only wants to be with her family. She wants them to hold her. To be with her. She doesn’t want to be alone. She certainly doesn’t want to play with the other kids. “Go!’ Sherry shouts, pointing to the door. Bunny jumps into action, leaving the room with tears in her eyes. She doesn’t go to her room this time. At least, not to stay. She grabs her favorite stuffed animal, Bunny II. It’s the one her dad gave her. It still smells like him. If they wanted to be left alone she could do that. She steps into the hallway with measured steps. She counts to herself how many. Finally, she reaches the bathroom. She closes and locks the door. She climbs into the bathtub, pulling the curtain close, not caring if she messes up her dress, her hair, or her stockings. She squeezes Bunny II to her as she cries. 

She may be nine years old but she’s not stupid. Mama doesn’t want her. She never has. She has been able to tell since she was little. She treats her differently than all of the sisters. She yells at her more. Acts as if she is a burden. Maybe Daddy noticed too. Maybe that’s why he made the extra effort to be with her. Bunny lets her tears slip out onto the cold flooring of the bathtub. She brings her knees to her chest to lie in the fetal position. She stuffs her thumb into her mouth, sucking stronger, as she pulls at her ear. It doesn’t make her feel better. At least not all the way. It would work for now. Her body begins to feel weaker. She can’t stay awake for too long as her eyes flutter closed. 

Hours later, Bunny wakes up by banging at the door. 

“y/n, are you in there?” It’s Danielle. She knocks again, and again, and again. Bunny lifts to look at the door, not wanting to answer, as the knocking gets harder. If she doesn’t answer they’ll worry. 

A part of her says let them. They didn’t care if she was alive anyway. They never care. When the knocking becomes excessive, she climbs from the tub with Bunny II dangling from her left hand. She turns the lock and twists the knob open to find her family looking back at her. She’s met by her mother’s enraged hands shaking her. 

“Have you been in here this whole time?” Sherry shook her. “Answer me?” She didn’t care that Bunny seemed afraid of her anger. “Hello! Answer me. Why didn't you say anything? We’ve been looking for you for hours.”

Bunny simply whimpers. “I’m sorry.”

“You’re sorry?” Sherry asks incredulously. “What are you sorry for? You know better. Don't just disappear.”

Bunny’s lip trembles but she doesn’t cry. She stands, with Sherry’s tight grip on her arms, and a blank expression on her face. 

“Take these wet clothes off and go to bed,” Sherry releases her.

Bunny nods to herself. This was going to be her new normal. 

The next time Bunny regresses is when she’s eleven years old. She’s sitting at the dinner table, refusing to eat, and getting lectured about it. Her mother has been giving her disapproving looks all night while everyone else around her does what they're told. She pushes her plate away with a pout sitting against the back of the chair. 

“Y/n, you’re not getting anything else,” Sherry warns her. “So you eat that or you go to bed hungry.”

“Hungry,” Bunny supplies and Mike smacks his lips. “I can go to bed hungry.” 

“No, you’re going to sit and eat the food, even if you have to be here all night,” Mike steps in. He’s been dating her mother for a year. Long enough for him to think his opinion matters in htis household. Apparently, it does. 

“I don’t want it,” Bunny looks ot her mother pleadingly. She slams her fork against the table. 

“See that’s the problem,” Mike says. He looks to Sherry to back him up. “She does what she wants. No one else here acts like this but her. You need to whoop her ass and then make her eat it. Don’t give her a choice. Eat the food. I’ve said it not her. I’d like to see you give me attitude like you do her.” His tone of voice isn’t welcoming or loving at all. His words push Bunny into action. She mashes her fork into the mashed potatoes, forcing herself to swallow them down between her tears. She doesn��t like peas. Her mom knows that. “When I was growing up I wasn’t allowed to tell my parents what I would or wouldn't eat.” Mike goes on and on. 

Bunny shovels more and more food into her mouth, finally pushing the plate away before she can finish. 

“I don’t want to,” She whispers. 

“Come over here a second,” Mike beckons her over. Bunny looks over to her mother for help but Sherry clearly agrees with him. Bunny reluctantly stands from her seat to come to Mike. “I can tell you have an attitude with what I told you right now.”

“I don’t,” Bunny shakes her head. “I just don’t like it.”

“Every time I come here you don’t like it and she lets you get away with it,” Mike frowns. “She worked hard to make you food and you sit and act very ungrateful. She already gave me permission to whoop you. I just haven’t yet. I think tonight I might have to.”

“No,” Bunny shakes her head. 

“No, what?” Mike asks. “Everyone else at this table is sitting here. You’re the only one that has a problem. You always have a problem.” 

“I don’t have a problem,” Bunny balls her fist unconsciously as her feelings get the best of her. Why was it such a big deal for her to eat? She doesn’t want it. She’s not hungry. She can just go to her room like always. 

“And you’re balling your fist up at me,” Mike is angry. “What are you going to hit me or something?” He stands, towering over Bunny, as he gets a bit closer to her face. “Don’t you ever ball your fists up at me or I’ll show you what it really means to be grown since you want to act like it.” Bunny’s tears come faster now as she tries to calm her breathing. “Now, I gave you a chance to sit there and eat, and you didn’t.” Bunny can see her siblings sitting, avoiding her gaze, as she receives her punishment. “Go, and sit down. You’re going to sit here until everyone is done.” He instructs with a poke to her chest. Under normal circumstances, Bunny would have rubbed the aching spot. Instead, she rushes to her chair, with her head down. She rubs her arms, hoping to keep quiet, as she cries. 

She can tell it’s making everyone else at the table uncomfortable but she doesn’t care. 

It’s another half hour when Mike lets her go to her room. She felt all cried out as she tucks herself into the wall against her bed. She pushes her thumb into her mouth, eyes squeezed shut, as she hopes to shut out the rest of the world. Somewhere far away she can hear Faith enter their shared bedroom. She’s too far gone to respond to her. 

She doesn’t feel like herself. Her headaches. Like a constant pressure that can’t be relieved. Bunny cries herself to sleep for what feels like the millionth time in her life. 

*******

Over the years, as the pain never leaves her, Bunny finds those fleeting moments to bring her comfort. When she can calm down and not think about anything else but what makes her feel good. She does it more often as she becomes older. Her brain feels younger with the same constant ache. 

When she’s adopted by Natasha and Wanda she tries to hide it. She really did. She would hide in her bedroom whenever she felt like she needed a moment to herself. She would suck her thumb, and count the tiles on the wall, or sing a song to herself in her head. Everything she wishes she had someone else do for her. Bunny is a few months shy of her sixteenth birthday when she finds a viral video of breastfeeding on her Facebook page. She passes over it once before scrolling back up. She’s entranced, intrigued, and startled by the feelings inside of her. She listens to the narrator talk about the bond, the nutrients, and the emotions it brings forth for both mother and child. She finds herself for the first time in her life upset by something so innocent. She slams her laptop closed, leaving it to rest on her desk, as she returns to her homework. 

Days past and her interest only grows

Why did it make her feel this way? 

Some nights, Natasha or Wanda would tuck her into bed. She’d find comfort in the form of cuddling with her mothers. Her nightmares seemed to be getting worse. Other nights, Bunny would allow herself to regress. She learned that word a while ago. She doesn’t know how old she is when it happens. She only knows that being in this space made her feel better. It felt safe. No one could hurt her when she felt like this. 

Bunny’s cravings for comfort only grew. She would research and watch videos and research more. Whenever she had a long day, she would find a blanket, and cover herself, pushing her thumb into her mouth and imagining it was her Mama. Her eyes popped open at the new revelation. Her interest was something entirely different. She wants it. She needs it. She’s too old to want something like that though. If someone found out they’d make fun. Another thing on the list of things wrong with her. So Bunny’s desire goes untouched. She’s content with her thumb-sucking and her imagination for now. 

Until one night, she’d had a particularly bad nightmare. She’s been crying out in her sleep, sweating dripping from her forehead, as she thrashes around. She’s ripped from her dreams by a cool compress against her forehead and another hand caressing her cheek. She opens her eyes to find Wanda’s understanding ones looking back at her. Her eyes flash over to the lamp on her nightstand that’s been turned on. 

She whimpers. 

“Shh, sweet girl,” Wanda gives her a soft smile. “Mama’s here. You had a nightmare.” Her voice is sweet honey to Bunny’s ears. Bunny doesn’t move, she simply watches Wanda work around her before the other woman crawls into bed with her. Bunny doesn’t hesitate to tuck herself into Wanda’s arms. She lays her head directly onto Wanda’s breast, using it as a soft pillow, as she cries to herself. “Hey, it’s okay.” Wanda traces patterns into her forearm. “You’re not there anymore. You’re here with me and Mommy.”

“Mommy?” It’s the only word Bunny can mutter. 

“She’s out on a mission, a last-minute thing,” Wanda explains. “She had to but she misses you a lot. Don’t you miss her?”

Bunny nods. She’s too afraid to speak. She doesn’t know if speaking will help her right now. 

“You’re not very talkative tonight, huh?” Wanda doesn’t find a problem with that. “That’s okay. We can just lie here.” At Bunny’s shift, she knows there is a problem. She can feel the way Bunny’s fingers trace along the hem of her shirt. She raises it up enough for the young girl to touch the entire expanse of her belly. “It’s called skin-to-skin. A lot of babies do it to bond with their mothers.”

“Me?” Bunny says. Her limited vocabulary is a bit concerning to Wanda but she chalks it up to her being sleep deprived. 

“If it helps you,” Wanda encourages. “I think of you as my baby already.” She shrugs. “We all need something to ground us sometimes.” Wanda’s words soothe her. She talks about any and everything as Bunny’s movements stop. Her hand now lies flat on Wanda’s belly, just inches away from her breast, as the girl falls asleep again. 

Wanda doesn’t think of the moment again. In the morning, Bunny is back to her talkative and loving self. She eats with Wanda, watches a movie with her, and even takes a dog on the walk. There’s no indication of her nightmare last night. There usually isn’t. When Natasha returns home, Bunny is in her arms before she can drop her bags. 

“I missed you that’s all,” The teen says when Natasha gives her a surprised look. 

It’s a week later when Natasha discovers what’s on her laptop. She’s come into the girl’s room to put her laundry away. She places folded clothes in their appropriate drawers before she goes to leave. Bunny left it open to go and shower before they left for the Avenger’s Compound. Tony was having a family picnic of sorts. Natasha isn’t intentionally snooping. She simply wants to close the laptop when the headline of the article catches her eye. 

Breastfeeding Mothers and inducing breastfeeding. 

Natasha reads over the line a few times. Was Bunny pregnant? No way. They would have noticed. So why was she looking at this? Natasha doesn’t find it weird. No. Not at all. She just doesn’t understand. She decides to leave the laptop alone and maybe mention it later. 

At the picnic, Bunny sits with Lila and Cooper as they catch up with each other. From time to time, she glances over to Thor and Jane’s newborn baby. He’s a couple months old now. Jane is none the wiser to Bunny’s longing looks as she feeds baby Elias with a blanket for privacy. Natasha on the other hand does notice it. 

What was going on with her?

Natasha mentions it to Wanda later on in the night. 

“I’m telling you, she was staring quite hard,” Natasha pushes the covers back on the bed so she can climb in. She’s talking to Wanda who is standing in the bathroom brushing her teeth. Her only responses thus far have been “yep” and “oh wow” as she listens to her wife’s theory. 

“I don’t think she’s pregnant but I’m concerned,” Natasha finishes. Wanda peeks her head from the bathroom to look at her. 

“If you’re really that concerned we can talk with her,” Wanda shrugs. She doesn't see the big deal. A teenager being curious about such a natural part of life didn't concern her. 

“No, I don’t know,” Natasha tries to figure out what is going on with you. “It’s not like anything bad can come from it? I guess. I’m just curious about the reasons behind her being so curious, you know? Nothing serious.” 

“Well, we can keep an eye on her and if it becomes a thing then we can say something.” Wanda flicks the switch in the bathroom. She climbs into bed with Natasha. She cuddles into her and Natasha automatically wraps her arms around her. 

It’s totally become a thing. Bunny’s behavior, in general, has become a thing. No, there’s nothing she’s done wrong, but Wanda’s began to notice things. Like how she leaves her blanket and Bunny II lying around the house, or how her taste buds have certainly regressed to that of a three-year-old, and sometimes at night, she wants to cuddle with her more. She doesn’t hesitate to press herself into Wanda’s side and rests her hands against Wanda’s bare belly. Wanda notices the increasing glances to her chest. 

It’s kind of hard to miss when anyone does it but when a sixteen-year-old girl does she’s concerned. So she brings it up to Natasha. 

“Could she be wanting to breastfeed?” Wanda asks one day while they’re in the kitchen. At Natasha’s look, she throws the idea out of the window. “I know it sounds crazy but that may explain it.”

Natasha thinks for herself. All of Bunny’s behavior would explain it. 

“You might be right Wanda but what do we do with that?” She’s just as lost as her wife. “I don’t want to bring it up and make her feel bad about it.” 

“We do so gently,” Wanda sighs. “With care and with compassion.”

“You always know what to say,” Natasha murmurs into Wanda’s neck as she sits on her lap. “I love you. I love the way you love her.” 

“I love you too,” Wanda replies. 

How could they help? By doing research. 

Natasha and Wanda both did research. Together and separate. They came up with no links at first until Natasha stumbled upon something called age recession. Most research was geared towards children of younger ages. Bunny’s situation is different. Entirely different. With all of the tools they needed, they decided to let things happen naturally. If outside help was needed they would seek it but for now, they wanted Bunny to come to them. 

The moment arises when Bunny has another nightmare. This time she’s reserved and more into herself than before. They can’t get her to calm down no matter what methods they try. Until Wanda remembers how much skin-to-skin contact has helped before. She rips her shirt over her head and tosses it somewhere across the room. She’s now in her bra and sleep shorts. 

“Bunny, I’m going to help you take off your shirt now,” Wanda says hoping to get through to the young girl. “Can you nod your head if you hear me?”

Bunny gives a slight nod but doesn’t offer anything more. She allows Natasha and Wanda to take off her shirt before she rushes into Wanda’s waiting arms. She lies her head directly on Wanda’s chest as she struggles to breathe. Feeling Wanda’s warm skin against her arms and chest, calms Bunny considerably. The ache in her head is at the forefront of her mind but she tries to push it down. 

“Mama,” Bunny hwimpers and Natasha shushes her from behind. “Mommy.”

“We’re both here this time,” Ntasha assures her. Bunny continues to cry in theri arsm. When her breathing is back to normal, Natash ais the one to bring it up. “Bunny, how old are you right now?” She wonders if this is the right question as bunny stiffens.

“Sixteen,” Bunny answers. 

“Do you feel sixteen?” Wanda tries again. There’s a silence as they wait for Bunny’s answer. 

“I don’t know,” She’s panicking again. “I don’t know. I do but sometimes i feel younger. Like I need more.”

“More than what we’ve been giving you?” Natasha guesses and Bunny nods. “I’m not mad. Mama isn't mad either. I found your breastfeeding articles.” Bunny begins to remove herself from Wanda’s arms but she’s stopped by Wanda’s tighter hold. “We’re not mad baby. We just want to understand you.”

“I’m sorry,” Bunny whimpers. “I made it weird. I’m weird.”

“You’re not weird,” Wanda frowns. “You’re not weird for wanting it either. Do you age regress?”

Bunny shakes her head. “No, I don’t think so.” She answers in a small voice. “It’s not like how I’ve seen. I don’t know. I don't want to dress up like I’m younger or do all of those things I don’t know.” She can feel herself becoming worked up again. “I don’t need to. I just sometimes it makes me feel better.”

“What makes you feel better?” They’re allowing her to lead the conversation in whatever direction she needs to. 

“Sucking my thumb,” Bunny confesses. “And my blanket, and Bunny II. I still feel like myself but younger. If that makes sense. I still am fifteen but I just need more.”

That makes perfect sense to them. She wanted to be nurtured and cared for. She needs that extra comfort sometimes. For some people, it was voluntary and involuntary for others. It seems that Bunny was more than aware of her feelings and what age regression looked like for her.��

“By more, do you mean breastfeeding?” Wanda questions. She can see the look of embarrassment on Bunny’s face. “It’s okay if you do.”

“You won’t think I’m weird?” Bunny looks up at her with wide eyes. “You won’t send me away? I can stop. Being that way I mean.”

“If you stop will that help?” Natasha figures this coping mechanism has helped Bunny through a lot. 

“No,” Bunny bites the inside of her cheek nervously. “I just… since I was younger I would feel different. Especially when I’m afraid. Like I needed someone to hold me and make me feel better. Like I need to be cared for. I do it on my own.” She wants to assure them that she isn’t asking for something they aren’t willing to give. She doesn’t need them to do anything. 

“But what if you don’t have to,” Wanda prods. 

“What do you mean?” 

“Mommy and I were talking,” Wanda takes a breath. “And we would be willing if it's something you want. It could be our thing.”

“A secret?” Bunny questions. 

“A good secret, Malyshka.” Natasha rubs her back.

Bunny goes over the pros and cons in her head. She’s been with Natasha and Wanda long enough to know they’re not joking. They’re being sincere. Someone finally knows how she’s feeling and she’s thinking about giving up the chance. She glances at Wanda’s chest before looking back into her eyes. She doesn’t want to make things awkward for her mothers.  

“Can I think about it?” She asks. 

“Of course.” Wanda kisses her forehead. She settles further into Wanda’s arms as she drifts off to sleep. She’s too afraid to think about it any longer. 

Bunny’s home alone with Wanda when she feels it. A sudden wave of anxiety and depression hit her full force. She doesn’t feel good enough, or competent, or anything really. She finds herself thinking bad things. Deciding that she needs a distraction, she takes Bunny II along with her to find Wanda. She finds the redhead in her usual spot on the couch with her knees up as she reads a book. 

“Mama,” Bunny stands against the back of the couch. Wanda closes her book to look at her. “Can we?” She asks. Another wave of anxiety hit her. She’s afraid of Wanda’s answer. Wanda doesn’t need to ask what she’s talking about as she places her book on the coffee table. With a wave of her hand, she gestures for Bunny to come around the couch and lie with her. The positioning is awkward until finally, Wanda decides to lie on her back, with Bunny in her arms. She starts by pushing up her t-shirt. As if Bunny can feel the nerves from her, the girl moves to get up. 

“No, stay, baby,” Wanda encourages. She lifts her t-shirt further up to expose her breasts. Bunny’s eyes immediately drop to look. “You want this?” Wanda asks one last time and Wanda nods. She could do this. With her left hand, she guides Bunny’s head to her chest. She uses her other hand to guide her dusky nipple to closed lips. Bunny’s nervous. She can tell. “It’s okay, baby.” 

Bunny’s lips part, giving an experimental lick before she gently takes the entire bud into her mouth. She suckles weakly, at first, trying to get a feel of it for herself. When she finds she’s more sated than she’s ever been, her suckling becomes stronger.

 Wanda gasps at the sensations and emotions running through her. She’s never felt so close to or loved by her child before. Bunny, a bit startled by the noise, raises her hand to cover her face in embarrassment. Wanda doesn’t like this. She removes Bunny’s hand placing it in the valley between her breasts. She runs her fingers over Bunny’s cheeks and hair. 

“Open your eyes, b.” Wanda waits patiently for thick lashes to flutter and for furrowed brows to straighten as Bunny looks at her. She only feels love as her baby girl looks at her completely satisfied and safe. “Good?” Wanda asks and Bunny nods. She never stops her suckling as she closes her eyes to fall asleep again. 

Her feelings of being unwanted, unloved, and everything else were washed away by the comfort of her mother’s loving arms. 

[josephquinnswhore]

i’ll be there for you - joel miller x female platonic reader

Summary: Joel comes to the conclusion that he deserves to have another chance at having a daughter, and you get a second chance at having a dad.

Word Count: 5.2k

Content Warning: typical tlou violence, blood, guns, reader contemplating suicide at the start, protective Joel, reader gets shot.

Life in the QZ was hardly luxurious, however you strived to see the positive things through rather than wallowing in the negative. Something you looked forward to was your dad playing guitar every night before supper, the strumming and melody of a song that was of his time, gave you both a sense of normalcy.

Your dad was one of the few that were allowed to leave the safety of the walls of the QZ, doing supply runs around the surrounding ruins of the city of Boston. There were few instances where the group doing the supply run were late to return and a series of unfortunate events meant that today was one of those days, the sky starting to darken as the sun sets on the horizon, the cool breeze drifting in from the north. You check the time on your watch, the simple block letters reading 5:57pm; a black and blue G-Shock watch, built to withstand the conditions you’ve put it through. It belonged to your mother, she passed when you were younger and your father handed it down to you at your mother's request, the small token the only memory you have that she ever existed. 

Standing unaccompanied outside during the day wasn’t safe, the violence seemingly increasing by the day, being a fifteen-year-old girl alone at night was dangerous. Tess walks up to you putting a hand on your shoulder,

“come on hun, let me walk you home. I'm sure he’ll be home soon.” She walked you through the streets to your apartment, her hand never leaving the small of your back. 

She gives you the gun that was on her hip, for your safety till your dad gets home, knowing what some of the men in this town were like.

It was 7:30pm when your dad came stumbling through the door, exhaustion written on his face, an unfamiliar look in his eyes had you feeling unnerved. “Dad are you okay? There’s blood on your shirt.” You frowned pointing at him and he lets out a humourless laugh, “it’s not mine sweetheart, I’m okay, made it back to you in one piece.” Your feet have a mind of their own as they step toward him, wanting nothing more to embrace him into a hug, the anxiety in your heart evaporates. He holds a hand up to stop you, “let me have a shower first,” he gestures to the blood that covers his green button up long sleeve shirt, “then I’ll play you a tune on the guitar, your favourite.” You smile and offer a weak nod as he walks past you into the bathroom shutting the door behind him. You start preparing for dinner, buttering bread and opening a canned package of pasta, years past its expiry date but well enough to declare edible. 

As you heat the pasta up you start washing some dishes to clear the kitchen, sinking into your nightly routine wanting your dad to be out here with you. Stuck in your own head and hands slippery from the soap suds on the plate you’re washing, it falls from the grasp in your hands and smashes on the ground, thousands of pieces that ended up across the house. Groaning in frustration you wipe your wet hands on your jeans, feeling the outline of the handgun Tess had given you earlier in the evening.  

Rustling came from the bathroom and the door banged against the doorframe, “dad?” Before you could think your hands gripped the handgun, turning off the safety, the feeing in your gut telling you something was wrong had your heart racing. 

The door burst open after something collided into it, that-something, being your dad, infected. Blood dripping from his wrist through his clean white sweatshirt, veins protruding from his face were dark and he growled at you, charging at you full speed he was across the room in seconds. The echo of a gunshot rang through the concrete walls of the apartment as you pulled the trigger, your dad- the body was lying with his back to the ground, blood pooling around him. 

The smell of blood, smoke from the gun and burning pasta became too much, your body fell to the ground at the weakness of your knees, screaming and pointed the handgun to your temple, you couldn’t do this without him-you couldn’t do this alone. 

How would you ever sleep again without hearing the sweet lullaby of your favourite song on the guitar, any living memory of your family now dead on the floor only feet away from you. 

You failed to notice three people storming into your apartment, Tess, Joel and Dan, Dan was someone your dad had been on a run with this evening that lived in the room across the hall from you. Tess snatched the gun that kissed your temple and pulled you into her body, “you’re okay. I got you.” Your body trembled beneath hers, Joel mumbling in the background of your ringing ears, “Fuckin’ hell. Check her for bites.” Tess sighed against you and checked your body, confirming you weren’t infected, “she’s clear.” 

Joel sighs running a hand through his hair he turned to Dan, “did you know about this?” The accusation is his tone as he pointed to the bite on the infecteds wrist, Dan only hung his head in silence. Joel stepped toward the cowering man, “you stupid son of a bitch you could’ve gotten this kid killed.” Tess snapped, “hey. Not now Joel.” Joel grit his teeth and grunted, “get the kid out of here. She doesn’t need to be ‘round this.” 

Tess picked you up and half-heartedly carried you to her room which was only down the hall, your body numb as you sat on the lounge. 

“Think you can eat?” You shook your head, knowing if you attempted to eat the contents of your stomach would paint the floor. 

“Get some sleep. I’m so sorry.” Her condolences went in one ear and out the next as you lie on your side, trembling. Tears spilling from your eyes as your brain replays the scene over and over. You try to remember your dads laugh and smile, it only made the ache in your heart worse.

When Tess finally fell asleep you broke down, sobbing quietly, your attempts to muffle the sound from the thin frail blanket proving unsuccessful to your efforts.

Joel hears you from one door down, unable to sleep into the early morning as he hears you. He can’t help but feel SORRY for you, you’re just a kid, it’s not his business, but he can relate to the guilt and loss you’re feeling, he worries he’ll find you dead next after finding you about to take your own life. It wouldn’t hurt to check on her in the morning, just to make sure, he reasons.

The next morning Joel stands hesitantly at the front of Tess’s door and tries to convince himself to walk away, to his surprise he doesn’t, he enters the apartment and sees you lying on the lounge, lifeless almost. He gently kicks the lounge, and your body doesn’t flinch, the only indicator that you’re alive is that your eyes moved to look at him. He stands with his hands in his jean pockets, “how you holdin’ up?” Fucking idiot what a stupid question, he internally scolds himself. 

You huff, “fuckin shit. Why are you here?” You sit upright and Joel takes in your features, dark circles around your eyes, puffy cheeks and messy hair. “Heard you cryin’ all night.” You shift uncomfortably, “oh, sorry.” Joel reached into his jacket pocket and pulls out a small bag, full of dried fruit, nuts and beef jerky. “Thought you could eat.” You accept and as he’s walking off, he hears a quiet, “thank you Joel.” 

Something stirred inside him that made him feel guilty and he thought, wouldn’t hurt to check on her tomorrow, just to see if she’s okay, then that’s it.

However after the second morning visit, that wasn’t the end of it, he continued to visit you every morning and one day came bearing bad news, Tess had gotten infected on a supply run and she sacrificed herself to save Joel, that was three months ago and frankly you’d become attached to Joel, he was the only person you felt you had in your life. He continued to visit you every day after breaking the news to you, to make sure you’re still alive, and he can see small improvements in your healing, five months had passed after the first incident and three months since Joel told you about Tess, you’d fully moved in to Tess apartment now, your belongings invaded her apartment as hers lie stagnant. Joel refuses to accept he has any influence and regards how strong you were for holding together. 

That morning after he visited you, only for a few minutes to drop off some bottled water and food and small conversation ensued.

“You still havin’ them nightmares?” Joel already knew the answer, he had heard you nearly every night from his own room. Rushing from his own room to reassure you that you're safe, sometimes he stayed for a few hours after and sometimes he went straight back to his own room. You nod as your eyes meet his, “yeah. Sometimes I'm fine other nights It's like I'm reliving it.” joel offered a sympathetic look and his hand patted your shoulder before telling you a lie. “It’ll get better kid.” You smile at his optimism, “thanks.” he walks out of the door, your mind filling with more positive thoughts, giving you some motivation to take care of yourself.

Joel heads into a building and pushes past the long line of people waiting their turn to use the radio, with a bribe of cigarettes he’s let in and is notified no one has heard anything from Tommy in 8 weeks. He decides then and there he’s leaving, today. You cross his mind, he shoves the thought down, you’re not his problem, Tommy is, so why did he feel a sense of guilt at the thought of leaving you.

Today you had showered, brushed your hair and put on clean clothes, finally stepping outside, your body soaking up the warmth of the sun and wrapping your arms around yourself in hope of shielding your body from people’s judgemental stare. 

You see Joel rushing out of his apartment with a backpack on his shoulders, looking back and forth as he disappeared down the streets. Your curiosity spiked and you follow him, your body praising you for the movement, loosening your aching joints. 

Joel was, escaping? Tears stung your eyes and your heart felt bitter, he didn’t owe you anything so why did it hurt that he was leaving you here. 

“Joel?” He turned to face you and he sighed, that unfamiliar feeling settling in his stomach uncomfortably. “You’re safer here, kid.” He tries to reason, tears fall down your face, “that’s so far from the truth Joel and you know it. My own...” you stutter and exhale, “my own father tried to kill me in our own apartment. I’ll have no one if you leave me here. Please.” You beg and Joel’s shoulder slump, “you got 5 minutes, a second later and I’m leaving without you.” You nod and rush back to your and Tess room packing essentials and rush back to meet Joel, a burn present in your lungs from running and chest heaving, with all but 20 seconds to spare. “C’mon then, gotta get somewhere safe before dark.” 

For the first time in your life, you left the safety of the walls of the QZ and with Joel by your side you’d never felt safer. 

The weeks went by timelessly as you were covering ground quickly and only coming across a few infected which Joel took care of, few words were spoken between the two of you, but becoming more comfortable around each other, Joel was still at times distant with you, and you were as you saw yourself; a liability. You were another mouth to feed and body to protect, you couldn’t wield a weapon like Joel did, the trauma of ending your own father's life as the infected coming full grit when you came across a runner, what your father had turned into. Your body not strong enough to fight the infected off. Joel for one was grateful you did what you were told, exactly as you were told.

The next morning you were both awake at dusk, the bright colours reflected off your skin as you begin the journey across the country in search for Tommy heading north-west. You try to take your mind off the burn in your calves, you didn’t want to complain and make Joel stop, he was already doing you a favour by bringing you along so you decide to make conversation, seeing how much you can get out of him without being a pushover.

“What did you do before, everything?” Joel turns to look at you briefly before hesitating, “we were called contractors.” You nod, prying him to continue. “What’s a contractor?” Joel raises his eyebrows, “like building, houses, stores that kinda thing.” You smile, “that’s pretty cool,” Joel smiles to himself at your comment and shrugs nonchalantly, “yeah. We were cool. Everybody loves contractors.”

Joel secured a small house in the middle of the woods after 12 hours travelling and two small rests in-between, the darkening sky indication that you needed to stop for the day, there were no sign of recent tenants or infected in the house. He pulled a bookshelf over the front door and an old steel freezer over the back door, securing the house. You pull out your sleeping bag and set it up on the floor in the second story master bedroom, the mattress completely deteriorated showing exposed springs all over. Pulling out a can of baked beans, you eat them cold until you were scraping the bottom of the can to eat the remaining sauce.

Joel joins you and sets his own sleeping back up feet away from your own, lying down and starring up at the ceiling, the darkness pulling you into its haze.

“Joel?” Your quiet voice hardly reaches his ears across the room, he turns to you, “hm?”

“I gotta tell you something serious.” Joel watches you, “what?”

“Did you hear about the restaurant on the moon?” Joel huffs, before you can finish your joke he interrupts, “I hear the food is good, but they had no atmosphere.” You gasp, looking at him in fad-annoyance as he ruins the punchline of your joke, “you dick, you ruined my joke.” He rolls over so his back is facing you, so you don’t see the smile on his face.

A few minutes of silence pass and you stifle a laugh, trying to cover it as a quiet cough, “you know...” you start and Joel sighs, “the person who came up with the saying ‘laughter is the best medicine’ had obviously never had diarrhoea.” A silent exhale leaves Joel’s lips before he chuckles quietly, his body vibrating everything he does, you start laughing as a result and for the first time you hear him laugh. A few minutes pass and Joel readjusts his body once again, “get some sleep, try not to shit yourself while you’re at it.” You smile and shake your head, “night Joel.” He mumbles under his breath, “yeah. Night kid.”

Time seemed irrelevant when you’re travelling for 12+ hours a day on foot. The snow beneath your boots provided some relief to the burn in your heels. Alas; you didn’t complain, you felt like Joel was opening up to you and the last thing you wanted was to annoy him by complaining.

Joel knew you needed a break, he always knew. Your stubbornness and anxiety silenced you, your body sluggish and steps smaller as you struggle to step through the snow, puffs of cool air creating a cloud as you breathe through your mouth. He shortened his steps, he wanted badly to find Tommy but knew it would do him no good to have you collapse from exhaustion and him having to drag you the rest of the way, leaving you wasn’t an option. He admired your strength and resilience to continue even though you were straining your body, you had become his counterpart and he didn’t hate it. You were no equivilant of his daughter of his-by any means. The dynamic changing between you as you found yourself caring for Joel, fearing for him when he fought off an infected, wondering what you would do if you were left all alone.

“Stop thinkin’ so goddamn loud.” Joel’s voice pulls you out of your head and a wave of embarrassment comes over you, “sorry.” He huffs out of his nose and finds a small cave to set camp in, you start to gather twigs and branches and Joel takes them from you, “go and sit down, rest.” You start to protest, and Joel raises his eyebrows and you do as you’re told, setting up both yours and his sleeping bags in the empty cave, shivering as the winter air bites you through your flimsy jacket.

Joel comes back with the mountain of sticks in his arms, cradling them and starts to build a fire. With some matches he lights the fire, taking all too long to warm your freezing body.

His eyes watch you as you shiver, your sleeping bag tucked around you and your body sitting as close to the fire as possible without catching alight. He takes off his outer layer leather jacket and throws it over you, still wearing three layers and admittedly starting to sweat as the flames filled the small area of the cave. “Joel I can’t take this-,” trying to hand it back to him he holds his palm out to stop you. “I’m sweating, don’t need it. Put it on.” You comply and start eating your ration of beef jerky, swallowing a small amount of water to wash it down. “What sort of music did you listen to?” Joel lifts his head to see your body still, no longer shivering and he shifts to get comfortable, “this band called Bon Jovi, they were a rock band. Had some great hits.” Your eyes water slightly at the mention of the band that made the song your dad played for you every night , your dad always used to talk about rock and metal bands, how he grew up in the 80s and loved the music scene and style, widening his palate when he met your mum who was into pop and soul music.

You cry quietly and feel Joel’s eyes on you, “I’m sorry.” You wipe your tears away with your sleeve. “The song my dad used to play for me every night was ‘I’ll be there for you’. Bon Jovi was one of his favourites, turned out to be one of mine too-was.” Joel felt sympathetic toward you, he knew the song well and it was enough to make a suffering teenager emotional, let alone what you had to do to the man it reminded you of. “You should get some sleep, getting late.” You nod your head in agreement, your eyelids feeling heavy with each blink. The warmth that enveloped your body like a giant blanket, after a few minutes you felt yourself drifting to sleep, a gentle hum of your favourite song came from the man sitting across from you, unable to fight the melody you succumb to your exhaustion and fall asleep.

You woke up before Joel feeling refreshed, your mind replaying the hum of that song, felt like maybe you had found some kind of pathway to healing. You sat upright and packed your bag quietly, setting it to the side, picking up Joel’s gun and moving outside of the warmth of the cave, looking for any signs of danger while Joel gets some sleep.

You do a perimeter check and lean against a rock beside your campsite when you heard Joel wake shuffling noisily as he woke, his eyes turning to you in a panic to see you standing outside with his gun. “You fell asleep, so I kept watch, did a perimeter check and it’s all clear.” Joel groans as he stands, his knees clicking as he straightens his back. “You could’ve gotten hurt, give me that.” He snatches the gun off you and sighs. “I just wanted you to get some rest, I’m sorry.” Joel exhales and runs a hand over his face. “Wake me up next time, okay? Can't risk havin’ you out here.” You nod and Joel packs his things, handing you a portion of dried fruit to eat for breakfast.

White was all you could see for miles, the snow covered the ground in a thick layer, crunching underneath your boots, tree branches weighed down with snow bent crookedly. There were no infected out here, you hadn’t seen them for days. “Why haven’t we seen any infected?” You watch Joel as he walks beside you, head forward unmoving. “Too far from the city, that’s where most of them are.” You accept his answer and go back to walking in silence.

The thundering noise of horses comes barrelling towards you, half a dozen people all armed with guns, Joel grabs your arm and pulls you behind him as the people circle you, pointed their weapons at you and you turn to see you're surrounded. “Get behind me.” You do as Joel tells you and stand behind him, both raising your hands in surrender. “We're not looking for any trouble just passing through.” Joel tries to reason. The man directly in front of you wore a cowboy hat and bandeau around his face, “drop the gun.” Joel takes the strap of his gun off his shoulder and sets it on the ground, his arms back up above his head.

The man turns his attention to you, gun raised and aimed right at you head, “you.” Your heart is hammering in your chest and your breath quickens in a spike of anxiety. “Take five steps back.” Joel turns to look at you, then back to the man, “why don’t we just talk this through?” “Why don’t you shut the fuck up,” the man sneers. “Okay, easy.” Joels voice softens, trying to ease the tension.

You look at Joel and he turns his head to look at you and nods, his eyes trying to reassure you but faltering for a moment. “You’ll be okay.” You take five steps back from Joel and your eyes land on one man behind you with his rifle pointed at you.

“You been near infected?” The man you assume is the leader asks. “There aren’t no infected out here.” The man scoffs at Joel, “the hell there aint.”

He whistles and a dog starts barking, your eyes watching it as the handler brings him forward the leader speaks, “last time for a bullet, if you're infected, he will smell it and he will rip you apart.”

The dog barks aggressively and is let off the restraint of the leash, it walks up to Joel, sniffing his boots and jumps up on him with his front legs briefly holding the position before walking back to the handler. “Like I said, we can just move on.” Joel states, wanting you out of this situation he knows he can't protect you from. The man looks at you and nods his head, his gun pointing towards you, “now her.” The dog stalks towards you lowly growing, Joel looks over his shoulder to look at you, wide eyed and panicking you shake your head at him and he looks forward feeling panic course through his body, you weren't infected but didn’t like the dog's menacing behaviour. The dog approaches you slowly, Joels body tensing as he looks forward, unable to shake the terror of seeing you torn apart by this dog.

The dog nudges you and licks your hands causing you to giggle, you pet his head and Joel turns around to face you, exhaling the relief he felt as he saw you cuddling the dog. The man nods and whistles, calling his dog back away from you. You rolled your shoulders forward to relieve them from their tension.

“You just bought yourself ten more seconds, what you doin out here?” Joel replies, “just lookin for my brother, that’s all nothin’ more.” The lady from the back moves forward on her horse in front of Joel, “what's your name?” “Joel.” She looks between you and Joel and nods to the leader.

The man behind you pulled his horse forward, eyes fixated on your watch, you turned your head noticing him closing the distance between you, his gun still ready to fire. You yelped as he grabbed your wrist, inspecting the watch. “What the hell are you doing, she aint infected! Let her go.” Joel yelled. The man snapped at Joel who watched on hopelessly as the others watched on, “shut up,” he looked back to you, “where’d you get this watch?” You whimper against the grip on your wrist, “it was my mothers.” His grip on your wrist tightened and started to twist it, “tell me the fucking truth.” Tears slipped past your eyes as his fingernails dug into your flesh. “I’m telling the truth.” The woman protested, “Nick, leave it. Shes just a kid let her go.” He turned to snap at her, “this was my sisters watch and she was murdered in cold blood. She knows what happens to her.” Joels eyes looked to the group, hoping someone would help. You were just a kid; this grown man was hurting you. “I don’t know what happened, I swear, it was my mothers.” You were sobbing at the searing pain in your wrist and fear overcoming you. You looked at Joel, a silent plea, begging for his help. You were met with his conflicted eyes, hopelessness written all over his face.

You were pushed to the ground harshly, whimpering as you tried to stand, Joel takes one step towards you before the gun is pointed towards him, “dont.” Joel growls and looks between you and the gunman, the crack through the air happened so suddenly, your body falling limp, face first into the snow, blood staining your clothes and the snow beneath you. Through your ears ringing you hear multiple gunshots and Joel screaming for you, his body dropping to the ground next to you rolling you over so you're on your back. His hands covered your wound, “oh no. No, no no.” your breathing was erratic and tears fell from your eyes, Joel cradled your body in his arms, “you're okay, I got you.” He tears the bottom of your shirt and you write in pain, screaming. “I know, I know, I know it hurts.” He puts pressure on the wound, his body trembling as he watches you helplessly. He picks your body off the snow and the woman jumps off her horse and helps Joel lift you onto the now free one they had shot the gunman off. Joel straddles the horse and follows the group back to camp. Your eyes start fluttering, the weight of them proving too much to keep open, your body coming in and out of consciousness. “Look at me baby girl, keep your eyes open.” Your body falls limp as you pass out and Joel puts pressure on your wound with one hand, the other controlling the reigns of the horse. He can't let this happen again, grief overwhelming as he looks at your body and sees his failure of Sarah happening all over again.

It only took minutes to get to their camp, for Joel it felt like hours, time slowing as the fate of your life lies in his hands. Everyone got off their horses to help Joel carry you down, jumping to the ground he carried your limp body to the infirmary they had available, two people immediately ushering him to lie your body on the bed and they immediately tended to your wounds. “Joel?” He turned around to see Tommy and they met each other halfway to embrace in a hug, “Tommy.” Joels body slumped against Tommys as he led them outside the building and into the repair shop.

“What happened Joel, from the start.” Joel slumped as he sat on a stool, Tommy following and sitting beside him.

“She was attacked, her father was infected, and she had to shoot him, she had to kill her own father. I felt this guilt, that a child had to do that where she was meant to be safe, found her with the gun to her head.” Tears fell from Joel’s eyes, “I checked on her the next morning and was worried she was dead. It was only meant to be once, but she grew on me.” Joel rubbed the side of his face, “something about her felt familiar, she reminded me so much of-” Joel shook his head, not able to speak his daughters name as he chokes back a sob, “I couldn’t leave her there Tommy.” Tommy lifted his head to meet Joel’s eyes, “i have dreams every night.” “What kind of dreams?” Tommy replies. “This kid having the same fate as…Sarah, I'm failing it's all I do, it's all I've ever done. Now I can't help but feel like I should've left her, I wouldn’t have gotten her killed.”

Tommy shook his head, “this isn't on you Joel, you're fighting the world all on your own.” Joel’s voice was thick with emotion as he shook his head, “for the first time in decades I wasn’t alone, now I'm living that nightmare over again.”

The door flew open, banging on the cupboard as it flew open, Maria walked through the door watching as the two men stare at her, “she's awake.” Joel stands up that quick the stool falls to the ground and he’s out the door in seconds, ignoring the burn in his lungs as he runs to the building you were in, flinging the door open to see you bandaged up and hooked to an IV, eyes open and watching him. “Joel.”

The moment his name left your lips he was by your side, checking over your body and seeing if you were alive or if his mind was playing a cruel trick to deceive him. His hands held your hand, your free hand coming up shakily to wipe the tears that escaped his eyes, “didn't know you cared about me so much,” you say jokingly. Joels stare didn’t falter, “I do.” The seriousness in his voice giving you a comfort you didn’t know was possible from the day your dad died. “I believe you Joel.” Your eyes felt heavy as the pain medication dripped from the bag into the IV, flowing through your bloodstream, relieving your body of the pain. “Don't got enough damn blankets in here.” Joel huffs taking off his jacket and pulling it over you. “Get some sleep baby girl.” in your drug induce haze you reply, “mkay dad.” Emotion overcomes Joel as he starts to sing your favourite song;

“I'll be there for you

These five words, I swear to you

When you breathe, I want to be

The air for you

I'll be there for you

I'd live and I'd die for you

I'd steal the sun from the sky for you

Words can't say what love can do

I'll be there for you.”

[buddy123sblog]

Arsenal x teen reader

y/n pov

It was coming close to christmas and all my arsenal teammates were preparing to go back to their homes for the holiday. during training that's what was talked about the most, what they were doing for christmas, who they were spending it with, when people were flying home. I tried my best to distance myself from the girls while they talked about it, not wanting to be asked what i would be doing for the holiday. I wasn't going to fly back home to australia and spend christmas with my toxic parents who ended up kicking me out at 16. If my teammates found out about this they would freak, being very overprotective seeing as i'm the youngest on the team and living  by myself in a different country.

"when are you flying home for christmas kid?"

A Irish accent rings in my ear as an arm slings around my shoulder bringing me into a side hug as i walk towards the locker room. I slightly look up to make eye contact with katie as i try to think of something to say.

"i'm not" i say blandly looking down at the ground as i enter the locker room.

"Your not going back to australia for christmas?" katie says rather loudly, causing a lot of attention towards us especially from the three other aussies in the room.

"nope" i say popping the 'p' as i sit down in my cubby and start taking off my boots.

"your spending the holiday in london with your family? That's sweet" leah's the next one to speak up as she walks over.

"yeah um something like that" you murmured as you quickly took of your training gear and changed into a pair of fresh clothes, not noticing the confused looks between leah, katie and your australian teammates.

Before they could ask you anymore questions your phone began to ring, staring at the australian number you knew all to well you completely froze. everyone in the locker room looked at each other with confused expressions as they noticed your hands shake as you completely power off your phone and toss it into your bag.

"i-er- i have to go, i'll see yous tomorrow" you say quickly, slinging your training bag around your shoulder and speed walk towards the exit.

"you not coming to team bonding tonight?" beth speaks up rather loudly.

"i cant sorry i have a shit tonne of school work i need to finish"

"Oi, language" steph speaks up as she hits you lightly on the back of your head.

"sorry mum" you say sarcastically while rolling your eyes as the rest of the team start laughing.

"anyways bye" you say quickly as you slip out the door and down the hallway.

The locker room stays silent for a few seconds until steph speaks up.

"she's been acting weird today" she says unsurely getting a few quiet agreements.

"yeah she was very quiet during training" leah says looking towards kyra noticing how the young girl was zoned out.

"kyra? you okay?" Kyra snaps out of it quickly and makes eye contact with leah.

"did you see how she reacted when her phone rang? i think something's wrong" she says quietly.

"yeah that was odd, it looked like an Australian number aswell" Katie spoke up.

"i'm sure everything's fine, we'll talk to her about it tomorrow" Viv says calmly as she beckons everyone to get ready.

"yeah okay, anyways, everyone still good to meet at the cafe tonight" beth says excitedly getting lots of agreements from the team.

time skip

You sat in the corner booth of your favorite cafe with your music blasting through your headphone, your lap top in front of you and papers littered all over the table. You had been here for over two hours, glued to your school work and not paying attention to anyone around you. Meaning you didn't notice the large group of girls sit in the booth across the room from you, but they definitely noticed you.

"is that y/n?" caitlin asks as everyone looks towards you.

"Ha she's a nerd, wearing glasses" katie says laughing getting a hit to the arm from viv.

"she looks tired" it's kyra who speaks up this time, noticing your eye bags from afar and your drained facial expression.

"i'll have a talk to her about it when i can" leah says sternly as she analyses your figure.

You finish the sentence you were writing and pick up your coffee to take a sip only to find out that it's empty. You slip your headphones around your neck and look towards the counter, seeing the boss/friend harry.

"oh harryyyy" you call out in a sing song voice holding your cup in the air. Multiple people in the cafe look towards you while some of the regular customers start laughing to themselves, already knowing what's going to happen. Your teammates sit there confused on why people were laughing at you and how you new the boss.

"no" he says taking one glance towards you then back to what he was doing.

"what, please"

"no"

"why not" you say with fake innocence.

"That's your 9th cup in the last 2 hours! you gonna die with that much caffeine intake kid!" he says pointing a finger at you causing you to pout.

"Okay and? just one more, pleaseeeeeeee" you beg getting up from your seat and making your way to the counter.

"come on harry, give y/n her coffee!" one of the regulars speak up from their booth followed by a few more of the customers you knew.

"come on look at her, no way you would deny this adorable face" jack says as he comes up behind you and pinches your cheeks. you give harry your best puppy eyes and smile as he glares at you and jack.

"what sort of tag team is this, ganging up on me or what?" he says annoyed.

"not tag team. More like........ y/ns support team" one of the regulars speak up causing you to laugh.

"Fine. One more coffee" harry gives in as he heads towards the coffee machine.

"YES!"

"Then that's it no more" he sends you a knowing look

"we'll see" you reply with a smirk.

"looser"

"weirdo"

You turn around and give jack a hug before high fiving your 'support team'.

"i y/n l/n, am so incredibly grateful for my amazing support team who help me convince the grump behind the counter, to make me coffee, thankyou" you say dramaticly, earning a few cheers from around the cafe before you skip to the counter and collect your coffee.

throughout the commotion you missed the eyes of your teammates all looking at you in shock and amazement as you sat back into your booth with a proud expression on your face as you sip your drink. 

"wow the kid actually has friends other than us" katie's says somewhat shocked.

"she shouldn't be drinking that much coffee" viv says sipping her own coffee.

"wonder who the boy she hugged is" beth speaks up.

"boyfriend maybe?" katie says with a smirk

"she would've told me if she had one" kyra says sternly, feeling protective over her best friend.

"i told her she's not aloud to date" steph says proudly

"jeez, you really are her mum" caitlin says teasingly

"okay but honestly, how many kids still date behind there parents back" leah says looking over towards you with an overprotective look.

You feel people's eyes on you but before you could look up a body slid into the seat next to you causing you to flinch.

"jesus jack you nearly gave me a heart attack" you say whilst taking your headphones off your ears.

"sorry kid, also what bullsit is this?" he says moving your laptop infront of him and scrolling through the essay you've just finished writing.

"some well-being class i had to take this year and write an essay about" you say taking another sip from your drink.

"go on then, tell me about it" he says curiously.

"it's literally right infront of you, read it" you say laughing.

"yeah but it's way to long and i don't have the attention span to do that" he groans

"omg i'm so sorry, i forgot you couldn't read" i say sarcastically while putting a hand on his shoulder in fake sympathy.

"shut up and tell me about it" he says giving me an offended look before swatting my hand away.

"fine, i wrote about the affect growing up with toxic family's can have on a child's mental health along with how it changes one's mindset while they grow up." i say avoiding eye contact with jack as i continue.

"i don't know, i just wrote about what someone would feel about themselves and their life if they were in that situation i guess" i say going quiet at the end.

Jacks the only person i've told about my home life, and about being kicked out of my home in australia. Ever since i've met him he's been like a brother to me and i tell him everything.

He pulls me into a side hug as i rest my head on his shoulder, we stay silent for a few minutes before i speak up.

"she called me today" i say quietly "i didn't answer though"

"maybe you should call her back, see what she wants?" he says honestly.

I pull out of the hug and dig through my bag and grab my phone, i look at it for a few seconds before looking back at jack.

"can you stay while i talk to her?"

he nods his head with a small smile as he grabs my hand under the table and gives it a tight squeeze.

i take a breath before ringing back the number, it takes a few rings before someone picks up as i hold the phone to my ear.

"h-hello" i say quietly

"hey darling, when you coming home? It's Christmas soon and i can't wait to see you" your mum reply's in a fake tone you heard her use a lot with her friends.

"cut the bullshit Alice, i don't live with you anymore" i say, my voice shaky as i feel tears prick in my eyes.

"don't talk to me like that brat, i figured since i spent so much work and money raising you, you could pay me back for it"

"you didn't do shit, i raised my self"

"yeah and look how you turned out"

"just- what do you want" you say angrily

"ahh right, since your so rich now i thought you could sent me cut from your paycheck, you know, paying me back for everything i've done for you the past 17 years"

"absolutely not, i earn that money, me. You haven't spent a single cent on me my whole life. I don't even live with you anymore so find someone else to give you money because it's not going to be me" i say sternly, honestly in disbelief that she would even ask me that after what she's put me through.

"awww but honey at least come home, i miss you so much and i really want to see you" she says mockingly but i can tell she's angry.

"yeah? well next time you want to see me turn on the god damn TV" i say angrily before hanging up.

i sigh as i stare at my phone for a few seconds until jack squeezes my hand again.

"i'm taking it didn't end well?" he asks slowly

"nope, she just wants my money" i say with a fake sarcastic smile as i feel tears rolling down my cheeks.

"aw honey, it's going to be okay" jack says as he pulls me into him. I try to hold back the sobs threatening to escape my throat as i bury my face into his chest.

The group of girls watch from afar after hearing bits of your conversation during the phone call. Each of their heart breaks seeing you sobbing upset, never actually seeing you let your walls down and cry. They watch as the unknown boy looks up and makes eye contact with them, his eyes widen as he looks back down to where u tucked into his chest.

"i know this is a bad time, but are you aware that your team are here" he whispers just loud enough for you to hear.

You look up quickly and spot your teammates sitting across the room from you, all watching you and jack with concerned expressions. Rapidly you sit up and wipe the tears from your face pretending like nothing happened.

"There going to think your my boyfriend, you know that right?" you say teasingly.

"i gathered that, they were glaring daggers at me before" he say nervously.

"yeah watch out, steph gave me the whole no dating talk not that long ago" you sigh.

"okay that makes me feel a lot better" he says sarcastically while rolling his eyes and getting up from his seat.

"i'll see you soon yeah, call me if you need to talk or anything" he says kissing me on cheek as i nod my head and smile.

Before i know it he's left the cafe and i'm sitting alone again, trying to find an excuse to use on the girls if they ask why i was crying, which they will.

I quickly pack up my school work and leave the cafe as fast as i can, ignoring the calls from the girls and walking down the street towards my apartment. i break out into a sprint as i realise the girls started following me.

It doesn't take long for me to get home as i quickly lock the door behind me, running into my bedroom and locking the door behind me aswell. I take a moment to breathe before dumping my school work on my desk, sorting through my wardrobe to find a comfortable outfit. I manage to find a pair of fluffy pajama pants and a hoodie of kyra's that i stole the other day. As soon as i got changed i heard a faint knocking coming down the hall and then it suddenly stopped.

I internally groaned once i remembered steph had a spare key to my apartment as i hear multiple footsteps make there way closer towards me.

"y/n! Are you here?" it's leah that calls out, i hold my breath as i contemplate what i'm going to do. I decided to gaslight them into thinking nothing had happened. I quickly toss my hair up into a messy bun and unlock my door. I come face to face with leah and steph and i can see katie, kyra, beth, viv and caitlin standing behind them.

"hey guys, what's up?" i say casually walking through them and into my kitchen as they follow behind.

"don't 'hey guys' us, you know why we're here" steph says with her arms crossed giving me a motherly look.

"i actually don't, why are you here exactly?" i say trying to sound as confused as i can while opening a cupboard and grabbing a mug.

"because you have a secret boyfriend"

"because you were crying in the cafe"

"because you had an argument on the phone"

"because your being distant"

"because we care about you"

"because we chased you here"

"because your like a daughter to me"

All their answers spilled out of there mouths at the same time making it hard to understand. Although the answers that stuck out were steph and caitlin's, you were trying not to laugh at how caitlin assumed jack was your boyfriend but you also tried not to cry at the fact steph sees you as her daughter.

You nod your head as you start boiling a kettle for your drink.

"okay and they are valid reasons to be here, but i don't feel like answering questions right now" you say shrugging as you open your fridge in search for milk.

"yeah we'll your going to other wise your benched and i'll call sam" leah says sternly making your eyes widen and a horrified expression take over your face.

"pfft you wouldn't" you say surely as you start to make yet another coffee. Leah unzips her pocket and pulls out her phone, you yelp as you quickly grab her phone out of her hands.

"fine i'll answer you stupid questions" you say annoyed as you take your drink and lay against the corner of your L shaped couch with your legs taking up most of it.

The rest of the girls take seats around you, filling up your couch although there wasn't enough room for kyra as she stood there awkwardly.

"come here ky" you say, beckoning her to come lay between your legs. She carefully lowers herself onto you and lays her head on your chest, wrapping her arms around you as if you would disappear. You look up to kyra a lot and she's by far one of your best friends, really the only person on the team that you could be yourself around.

"go on then, ask your questions" you say boredly as you lean your head back and close your eyes.

"Who's the alice person you on call with at the cafe?" leah asks, you take a shaking breath before answering.

"My mum" you say hesitantly, leading to the girls being confused on why you were arguing with your mum.

"why were you arguing with her?" steph says curiously you hesitate to answer and it's obvious.

"You can tell us anything y/n, we're not going to judge you" kyra whispers, you let out a sigh as you start playing with her hair.

"Alice kicked me out when i was 16 and now she's calling me to comeback for Christmas because she wants me to repay her for everything she's done by giving her money"

The other girls hearts drop, not realizing how your mum treated you, although you don't give them time to question you as you keep up with your rant.

"She's never spent a single cent on me and i was left to raise myself. I worked so many jobs at 13 years old just so i could stay alive, then they expect me to send them money. Like what the fuck, they had me scared and traumatized for so many years until they had enough and got rid of me, and now they want me back? what because i'm actually successful?"

I couldn't stop my voice from cracking as i felt tears roll down my cheeks, i take a shaky breath, trying to control my breathing. I could feel kyra shaking as a wet puddle started forming on my chest. I quickly wiped my tears with both hands and looked down to my best friend.

"K-kyra, hey it's okay, please don't cry" you say softly pulling her forward so her face is resting in the crook of your neck. You rub circles on her back to calm her down, you look over towards the other girls to see that there cheeks are also tear stained, you go to say something but steph bet you to it.

"why didn't you tell us sooner" she says softly, her voice shaky.

"i didn't want to be a bother plus i've been alone my whole life i'm sure i'll manage a little longer" you say softly looking away.

"kiddo, your not alone anymore, you have so many people who care about you and we would do anything to help you"

"beth's right y/n, you have us, your parents are so cruel, but you have us we're your family and we all care about you so much" Katie says which makes your eyes widen as you turn and look at her like she had 3 heads.

"who are you and what have you done to McCard" you say sounding as confused as you felt, never hearing katie talk to you without any sarcasm or teasing.

Caitlin tried her best to hold in a laugh but failed as she saw the look on katie's face, beth and viv started chuckling quietly while steph shook her head and kyra giggled into your neck. Leah kept her gaze on you with a stoney unreadable look. 

"If you're not going back to australia what are you doing for christmas then?" viv asked

"i dunno probably just sleep and watch movies" i reply casually.

"absolutely not, your coming back with me" steph says sternly.

"Do i even get a say?" you ask in disbelief, your met with an array of no's from all the girls causing you to internally groan.

"now that's all taken care off, who's your little boyfriend" Katie asks teasingly, making you laugh. Kyra shoots up so she's basically sitting on you, ready to have her say in the conversation.

"yeah as much as i love you, your not aloud a boyfriend so i don't approve" she says sternly you laugh as you pull her back down to lay on you.

"y/n i've already told you your not aloud to date" steph says sternly.

"anyways, who's the boy" beth asks excitedly.

"calm down he's not my boyfriend"

"sure as hell doesn't look like it" leah speaks up  coldly, eyeing you suspiciously.

"we're just close friends, he's like my brother" you say with a smile, as all the girls sigh in relief.

"oh thank god, i did not want to have the birds and the bees talk" steph says somewhat relieved.

"don't stress steffy, the baby's still going home to australia as a virgin" katie says with a laugh.

"please, that ship sunk a long time ago" you murmur under you breath causing kyra to shoot up.

"y/n m/n l/n! What is that supposed to mean!" she says looking you in the eye causing you to blush out of embarrassment that she actually heard you.

"what did she say" viv says confused.

"y/ns not a virgin! She just said it!" kyra says pointing to you while looking at steph and leah.

"WHAT!" everyone except you yells

"wow way to throw me under the bus" you say as you start tickling kyra causing her to fall off you laughing.

You get up from your spot on the couch and walk back into the kitchen with your empty cup of coffee.

"who? when? where? why?" beth says shocked as they follow you to the kitchen.

"not telling, a while ago and in a house" you say mirroring her shocked tone and expression while saying the last bit.

"And why?" leah asks sternly.

"idk, maybe because i was horny" you say sarcastically as you start pulling stuff out to make dinner.

"Did you use protection, take a pregnancy test" steph says sternly, causing you to start laughing.

"We do not want to be aunties at the moment, and steffys too young to be a grandma" beth says somewhat serious.

"Did you at least make sure you used protection" katie says seriously, you tried to hide your smile.

"didn't actually" you say casually.

The girls all give you scared and disappointed looks as you tried not to break into a laughing fit then and there. You took the moment of silence to go back to what you were doing.

They all looked at you not knowing what to say, so you gave in and broke the silence.

"im 100% not pregnant, so chill out" you say laughing.

"you don't know that because you haven't taken a test y/n" caitlin speaks up.

"i'm calling sam, she'll tell us what to do"

steph and caitlin say as they start to call her, it takes a few rings until she picks up. great.

italics- sam

"whats y/n done now"

"y/ns not a virgin! and we think she's pregnant because she didn't use protection !" kyra yells before anyone else got the chance to speak.

"I'm not pregnant!" you say sternly

"i don't even know what to say"

"how are you even sure your not pregnant" viv asks sternly.

"we'll i don't know, last time i checked a girl couldn't get you pregnant" you say sarcastically.

There's a moment of silence before everyone lets a sigh of relief.

"why didn't you say that at the start!" katie says annoyed.

"what, it was funny seeing your reactions" you say with a smirk as steph hits you on the back of the head.

"ow!" you yelp rubbing the back of your head.

"You had me so scared you little rat" she says slapping your shoulder multiple times

"jesus mum i know how to have sex using protection, i'm not getting pregnant anytime soon!" you say swatting her hand away.

"are you implying that you've had sex more than once kid? With different people?" sam says teasingly, knowing it would spark a reaction from the other girls.

"sam shut up right now" you say sternly, honestly scared on how they would react.

"i can't do this right now, Caitlin come with me" Steph says seriously, leaving you a little scared

"why? where are we going?"

"we need to update sam on some stuff" she reply's impatiently, as they go to leave.

"wait!" you say quickly, speed walking over to them and grabbing stephs phone from her hand.

"bye sammy i love you" you say to the phone, knowing exactly what she's going to be told by the older aussies. using a soft tone so she won't get mad at you after.

"bye kid, i'll see you soon, love you" she reply's in a soft voice, you nod your head and pass the phone back to steph before they walk outside your apartment.

"we'll we're going to head off" viv says as she stretches.

"call us if you need absolutely anything okay" beth says giving your hand a squeeze, you only nod as a reply.

Soon enough your lying on the couch again with leah, katie and kyra, steph and caitlin still outside on the phone.

"wait... is that my hoodie" kyra speaks up from the silence looking straight at you.

"not anymore, it's my comfort hoodie now" you mumble and pull the hood over your head, all the sleep you missed finally catching up to you as all the caffeine you drank today stopped having an affect.

"why'd you drink so much coffee today?" Leah speaks up, remembering how you had ordered your tenth coffee at the cafe in only 2 hours.

"i'm a teenager with a shitty sleep schedule, how else do you expect me to stay awake" you reply tiredly causing leah and katie to sigh.

"well i think it's your bedtime, you look dead" katie says teasingly.

"wow thanks" you reply back sarcastically as you slowly get up and walk back into your kitchen. Kyra follows behind you as leah and katie hang back on the couch having a quiet conversation with eachother.

"why is my hoodie your comfort hoodie?" kyra asks curiously as you sit on the kitchen counter.

"because your my comfort person, so your hoodies like being with you when your not here, if that makes sense" you say embarrassingly.

"naww your to cute" she says as she stands between your legs and hugs you. You wrap your arms around her neck and hug her back tightly.

One thing kyra noticed about you was how much you loved hugs. Always up for a random hug during the day and cuddles whenever and wherever. You feel yourself falling asleep as you and kyra stay hugging in the kitchen but it was soon interrupted by steph and caitlin walking back into your apartment.

"time for bed kid" caitlin speaks softly.

"fine" you murmured as you unlatched yourself from kyra at got off of the kitchen counter.

You trudge back into the lounge room to give leah and katie a kiss on the cheek as you say goodnight, then moving on to steph and caitlin to do the same thing. You turn to face kyra as she gives you a smug smile and taps her cheek, you give her a deadpan look.

"what your not gonna your comfort person a goodnight kiss?" she says offended.

"no, your my cuddle buddy instead" you say as you grab her arm and drag her towards your room.

" what! how come kyra gets cuddles!" you hear katie yell.

"because i'm better than all of you!" kyra yells back cheekily

"and you have caitlin to give you cuddles!" you add before shutting your bedroom door.

You climb into your bed and wait for kyra to slide in next to you, as soon as she does you lay your head on her chest and she wraps her arms around you. You fall asleep almost instantly, not giving kyra time to ask you any more questions.

Time skip

You wake up and quickly get ready for training, realizing that the other girls left late last night. The thought of the whole team knowing about the situation with your parents made you feel nervous, not actually ready to answer all their questions. And on top of that kyra or beth would've blurted out the fact that you weren't in fact a virgin. You take a deep breath as you sit in your car, you quickly post on instagram before finally driving to training.

@yourusername

Happy birthday my love, so incredibly grateful for you and how much you've been there for me. Wishing you the bestest 18th birthday, see you soon baby ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️

@jack_jones

@jack_jones: i love you so much.

> @yourusername: 💗

@Samkerr: NO BOYFRIENDS!

> @macca: 1.5 METER SEPARATION

>@alanna: surprised steffy hasn't hunted him down yet

>@katrina: i might if she doesn't hurry up

>@kyraCC: You guys are way to overprotective, their just friends

>@yourusername: WE ARE JUST FRIENDS! (get out of my comment section btw)

@StephC: whole arsenal change rooms screaming about this 😗

>@caitlinF: hope your ready for the team interrogation  🤣

>@yourusername: mentally preparing myself 😖

view 893 more comments

[brin-guivera]

Some vintage books - thanks to @prudenceandthecrow for the Judy Blume and Blades of Mars - from their monthly sub and Yuletide bundle respectively. I love them!! 💜 . . . #stackingtheshelves #90sbooks #80sbooks #bookhaul #bookishfeatures #bookstagramfeature #bookstagram #bookporn #bookphotography #booklr #bookblogger #bookaholic #bookish #bookstagrammer #teenreads #patcbox #christopherpikebooks #booknerd #bookhoarder #booksofinstagram #bibliophile #bookworm #vintageya #vintageteen #vintagebooks #vintage #retroreads #retro #retrobooks #nostalgia https://www.instagram.com/p/Cm4Et7mrZw-/?igshid=NGJjMDIxMWI=

[curried-mermaid]

A Review: Sugar Apple Fairy Tale Vol. 1

Author: Miri Mikawa Illustrator: Yozorano Udon, Aki Publishers: Yen Press Age Group: Teen Genre: Fantasy Type: Manga

Content Warnings:

Spoilers ahead

Plot

Anne Halford is a sweet, caring fifteen-year-old with one goal: To win the Royal Candy Fair so she can become a Silver Sugar Master. If she does that, her mom’s soul (who’s recently died) will surely move on peacefully. There’s just one problem, in order to make it to the Royal Candy Fair she’ll have to travel the bloody highway filled with bandits, murderous crows, and wolves. 

She decides to get a warrior fairy, only he’s too pretty and has a horrible haughty attitude with a trash mouth to boot. Can she keep him in line long enough to make it to the Royal Candy Fair? 

Character Development

Ann Halford is a very sweet protagonist. She’s nice and treats everyone equally because she believes fairies and humans can be friends. She’s got talent as a silver sugar confectionist. She’s not very good at being assertive. 

Challe Fenn Challe is the beautiful warrior fairy who’s haughty and likes to insult humans. He calls Anne scarecrow. He seems to also be a bit melancholy, reminiscing about a human he knew before as he interacts more with Anne on their journey. 

Mithril Lid Pod is a small water fairy Anne saves from being killed by his previous master. He sneaks onto Anne’s wagon to repay her for saving him. He’s kinda loud and obnoxious but willing to prove himself. 

Jonas is a silver sugar confectionist related to one of the big workshop owners. He’s cheerful and is always trying to convince Anne that she’d be better off just marrying him. 

World-building

The kingdom of Highland used to be the kingdom of the fairies until humans rose up against them. Humans now rule. Fairies are treated as slaves by taking one of their wings you can control a fairy. There’s even fairy marketplaces where they can be sold as warriors (rare typing), pets (also rare and beautiful) or laborers (most of them). Fairies were the first beings to create silver sugar and humans adopted it. It’s said if you make a silver sugar confection right it can bring good luck and fortune to those that eat it. 

We find out that fairies are born from magic essence being collected in a single spot. This happens when a living being stares at the spot. They can’t taste food and absorb it. The only thing they can taste is silver sugar. 

Themes

Follow your dreams. 

This is a pretty easy theme to spot in this manga. No matter what happens throughout it, Anne insists on going to the Royal Candy Fair and becoming a Silver Sugar Master. When Jonas proposes, she refuses. When her confection is said to not have any soul to it. She buckles down on her dream. She won’t let anything stop her. 

Observations & Predictions

I think Jonas will do anything to stop Anne from trying to fulfill her goal. If she doesn’t fulfill it she’ll probably give up. If she gives up then she’d choose him. I wouldn’t be surprised if he was the one that made her silver sugar disappear at the end of this volume.

Anne, if she continues to interact with Challe after the Royal Candy Fair, will become more assertive. With her determination, I’m sure she’ll create candy pieces that will awe others. Anne is still grieving her mother so I hope she can put soul into her creations rather than just copying her mother’s style. 

I can see Challe developing a relationship with Anne, though what kind remains to be seen. Right now he sees a lot of Liz (former human) in Anne. This makes connecting with her easier and I’m interested to see if this develops into something further. There are hints of this in the first volume when she thinks of Challe when Jonas, yet again, tells her to just marry him. 

This is a sweet coming-of-age type story. We root for Anne and hope her dream comes true. I would recommend this for anyone who wants a sweet tasting story. 

Recommendations

Sweet Stories:

The World is Still Beautiful By: Dai Shiina

Spice and Wolf By: Isuna Hasekura

Snow White with the Red Hair By: Sorata Akidzuki

Kamisama Kiss By: Julietta Suzuki

My Happy Marriage By: Akumi Agitogi

Ice Guy and His Cool Female Colleague By: Miyuki Tonogaya

Sweets Focused:

Yumeiro Patissiere By: Natsumi Matsumoto

Sweet Reincarnation By: Nozomu Koryu

[reviewithowtoit]

The Grandest Game by Jennifer Lynn Barnes | High-Stakes YA Thriller | Fa...

[joyffree]

Brick & Mortar Book & Audiobook News for May 12th

➱ Romance: Barnes & Noble Exclusives

➱ 7 Romance Reads with Uplifting Mother Figures from Harlequin

➱ Simon & Schuster Hi5tory in Five

➱ B&N May Speculative Fiction Pick blurs the line between truth and illusion

➱ Simon Teen Freebies, YA Reads

➱ MEMOIRS FOR MOTHER'S DAY from Penguin

➱ Barnes & Noble May Nonfiction Pick

➱ One-Day Audiobook Super Sale!

➱ May's GMA book club pick is "this summer's hottest debut" Simon & Schuster

➱ Canine Crime-Fighters from Harlequin

➱ The Fear the Reaper: spooky fantasy and science fiction Promo

and More

[llamlooma15]

It's been so long about this request I still love it💕💕💕💕

Hi 👋😊.

I just had this a idea for almost a whole  year and it about a young teen female Reader who have a father figure or mother figure from the pirate they like the most but~~ I want them to be the older version from the future like when they are at the age of 40 or 60 . ( Strawhat pirates & white beard pirates & kid pirates) 

And if you don't write about the whitebeard pirate's it okay .instead of it I would like it to be the heart pirates 😊♡.

Edited!\ take your time okay, love your writing by the way👋😊♡

─Strawhats, Heart Pirates, Kid pirates & Whitebeard Pirates x teen!fem!reader (Platonic)

─Summary: some headcannons with your mother/father figure and the rest of the crew

─Warnings: the characters are older, like in those 40/60 year old drawings (reference)

Well yes I write for whitebeard and as a bonus you will have all four crews, ty!! ;)

─ You're like the baby of the crew, no matter how strong or smart you are, for them it's like a duty to keep you safe even though you don't need it.

─ Luffy, Chopper and Usopp are your best allies when you get bored and want to play or play a joke on others, although they are not so young for their usual games they can always make a small exception for you.

─ As for family roles… Sanji was like a father to you, he was the most attentive to everything, he controlled that you had a balanced diet, that you hydrated, and he made sure that nothing and nobody could bother you or harm you, physically or mentally.

─ This cook already has an age and a past that makes him want to protect every possible child, and despite the fact that you were not a child, in his eyes it still seemed that you were 5 years old and not 13.

─ You called him 'dad' once by accident and he cried after you left the room.

─ Sometimes he just walks into your room to tell you something random "did you know that swordfish can swim up to 100 km/h? They are great hunters" and leaves without saying anything else, he doesn't even wait for you to answer, "Close the door!" of course he never closes the door after that.

─ You spend a lot of time in the kitchen and he teaches you to make your favorite dishes.

─ Despite being forty years old, the fights with Zoro won't stop, and he always puts you in the middle to give him support, "yellow looks much better" "green is better, it doesn't look like piss" "Of course not, honey, what do you think about this? Yellow is better isn't it?" "I guess?" "Ha! see, my little girl is always right marimo"

─ Franky and Brook are like the uncles who spoil you.

─ Now… if you're looking for who won to be your mother figure, the award went to Nami, despite not being as young as before and having lived more adventures, she will never stop being like a scared cat and tends to separate you from danger when she sees it.

─ She earned most of your affection pretty quickly.

─ Typical mother who makes you save as much as possible, she'll lend you her old clothes if still in good condition, "this shirt suits you better than it did when I was your age, you'll be a beautiful girl when you grow up!"

─ Although she doesn't mind pampering you a bit if she wants, it's practically difficult for her to deny you something if you really want it, overall, she can always put others in debt to get more money.

─ Lots of relaxing baths with her and Robin, you like to gossip about everything you see when you stay on an island for a while.

— Many moments of shopping together, it doesn't matter if you like it or not, she will simply drag you down because she needs the opinion of someone younger to stay "in fashion".

— She'll also teach you everything she knows about cartography and navigation.

— Father figure Law lives under stress, his night schedules are still as shattered as when he was young and now he has a teenager under his wing to care for.

─ He is very strict with everything, he wants you to maintain a healthy life so you will have many restrictions, ranging from not spending much time inside the submarine to correcting your posture when you're sitting wrong. "You look like a shrimp sitting like this, correct your posture or you'll have back pain" "You look like an emo in your forties and nobody says anything to you" "…"

─ He's worried because teenagers are so carefree and stupid sometimes, he'll have Bepo supervise when he can't.

─ You have many arguments with him for small things, but don't worry, if he punishes you Shachi and Penguin are the uncles who get you out of trouble.

─ This duet with you by their side only means one thing to Law and it's headache.

─ Whenever you're in a bad mood, the crew jokes that Law has infected you with his continual sulking disease, and that now you are like father and daughter.

─ Law is a proud dad inside of him, he won't show that he is proud of you out loud, but in his mind he has you as someone smarter than half the crew.

─ He will teach you everything he knows about medicine, unless you don't like it or are too squeamish about operating or dissecting, however you are required to learn everything about basic first aid.

─ Ikkaku is the only woman on the whole ship so she was the mother figure who helped you not go crazy among so many men and an adorable bear.

─ You're always welcome in the kitchen to help or observe, but mostly to gossip, sometimes Bepo joins.

─ She has small details with you, like buying some matching pendants or bracelets, she also likes to comb your hair with different styles, definitely your personal hairdresser.

─ Unlike Law, Ikkaku will always let you know that she's proud of you for any little thing, like if you've only managed to take down a few guys on your own without help and will yell in mid-battle "Well done, that's my girl!"

─ God bless you with this crew because you will not have a day off, just because they have aged doesn't mean that they are not as chaotic as before.

─ Although they will respect you, you are not in this crew for nothing, and also, all these guys are afraid of an angry teenager with little hours of sleep. "Dude, shut the fuck up if you don't want me to insert this knife as a new piercing in your forehead" "Yo… ok, chill kiddo"

─ The closest thing to a mother figure that you found was Heat, because he was the one who acted the most like a mother hen with you, apparently he was the most concerned about your physical integrity because he was at that age of wanting children and you were the closest to that.

─ It's not like he was depriving you of potentially lethal weapons for a teenager, but he was more afraid of what people would do with someone young like you.

─ Because being in this crew most of the time means fighting and going to clubs, so yeah, he always had an eye on you just in case some nasty person tried something weird with you.

─ Wire always took care to relax Heat when you'd rather just walk around the village than be in a bar because you weren't much of a fan of drinking alcohol at your age. "What if she gets kidnapped? She can be there all alone being scared" "She literally dismembered a guy last time we fought, she'll be fine."

─ Wire is the cool uncle who lets you do whatever you want as long as your worried mom doesn't find out.

─ And if we talk about a father figure… Killer, Killer acted like a responsible father most of the time, not as worried as Heat but always watching over you and above all that you didn't let yourself be influenced by some of Kid's stupidity.

─ Because Kid was like your demon on your shoulder, despite already being of an age, this man wouldn't stop being impulsive and you're an easy-to-influence teenager, so you and Kid have a sibling relationship.

─ Killer just watches the two of you while he looks disapprovingly, you can't even see his face and you already know that he is disappointed with your decisions. "You guys broke what? oh okay." a lot of passive-aggressiveness whenever he scolds you.

─ But he will always scold Kid more because he is of legal age and should be responsible, he definitely doesn't leave you alone with him because the last time you ended up drunk.

─ And despite not being of many words, he's like the presence you need by your side at certain times, someone you can turn to if something bothers you and that you know that he will be there for you.

─ Overprotective squad in general.

─ Everyone sees Whitebeard as a father, however in your eyes he is like your grandfather, because Marco had earned the position of father figure.

─ This man wanted to establish a life a few years ago, start a family etc, then one day you just arrived and he decided to take you under his wing, literally.

─ He is the least worried if you compare him with the men of the other crews, he knows that he has many people who protect you by his side, so he is calm in that aspect.

─ He will still scold you for your bad habits. "Eat slower you'll choke if you keep eating like a turkey" "Don't you have a nest to make or something? I know how to eat, I'm not Ace" "Hey!"

─ Ace may have matured a lot more but he'll still be a bad influence on you, so Marco always asks Izo to keep an eye on both of you, because the last time he left you two alone you ended up in the stomach of a sea king.

─ His chest will swell with pride if you call him 'dad' in front of people.

─ He's the kind of dad who tells all the shits that have happened to you and he embarrasses you in front of the crew just because he wanted to tell a funny anecdote about you, although he later apologizes to you if he really upset you.

─ As for a mother figure, this crew is short of such things, but the closest thing was Izo, because without a doubt, within this crew full of testosterone, he was much more elegant and careful than the others.

─ And more than anything because you could steal his makeup to use it, although you didn't know how to apply many of the things he had, he helped you with that. "Honey you're spreading the makeup wrong" "Can you teach me Izo?"

─ He taught you a lot about self defense in case someone bothers you more than necessary, like using guns, you should know how to protect yourself just in case.

─ Proud mom watching you kick ass.

[familyhubfinds]

Illuminate Your Knowledge: The Impact of Low-Power Lights on Your Eyes and Brain

Hey there, Tumblr fam! Let's dive into something illuminating today – the fascinating world of low-power lights and their effects on our precious eyes and brilliant brains.

🌟Did you know that the type of light we're exposed to can influence our health and well-being? It's true! Whether it's the soft glow of your bedside lamp or the calming light of your e-reader, here's how it all works:

🔵 Low-power lights emit a gentler, warmer spectrum of light that's less harsh on your eyes. This means reduced strain during late-night reading sessions or when scrolling through your favourite Tumblr blogs in the dark!

🌙 But it's not just about comfort; it's about sleep quality too! Low-power lights, like warm white LEDs, have been shown to have less impact on your circadian rhythm, making it easier for you to fall asleep when you're ready.

So, let's take care of our eyes and minds, one low-power light at a time. Share this post to spread the knowledge, and remember, a little less brightness can go a long way!

[marshmyers]

Here’s another piece of spoiler-free artwork from my upcoming novel, My Summer (and the Song of Cicadas), due out next year. I won’t say much about this composition other than the figure is one of the main characters and yes, he’s wearing a costume.

[bonnettsbooks]

Growing up is a long slow process. These books represent steps along the way. I'm thrice legal age and still learning. The world can be hard and make us gruff. Accept the challenges, but try not to lose touch with your inner child along the way.

6/12/23 Open 6-9p. No open containers, please.

[chrismullenwrites]

And just like that, ROWDY ~Return is headed for Wise Wolf Books! Raise a glass if you have one. Man! This book has me going. It’s like a child leaving for college. You hope for the best and pray! STAY ROWDY! 🤠 #readrowdy #chrismullenwrites #texasauthor #book #bookaddict #booknews #bookreaders #books #booktok #trending #fyp #read #reading #readingcommunity #readingthewest #series #teenreaders #yabooks #yalit #yawestern #bookstagram #authorsofinstagram #amwriting #submitted #manuscript https://www.instagram.com/p/CoTin2BuDWL/?igshid=NGJjMDIxMWI=

[fleming-o]

A little to much - BarcaFem X TeenReader

when school and being a footballer becomes to much, your teammates are there to help out

4k words

master list

---

You’d been hiding it for weeks now. Every missed assignment, every test returned with red marks, every moment in class where you felt like your brain was moving slower than everyone else’s. It started small—a late homework submission here, a careless mistake on a quiz there—but it piled up quickly.

The pressure grew heavier with each day, but you kept it to yourself. The girls on the team had so much going on, and you didn’t want to add your problems to their already full plates.

They were your family, though. Barça Femení wasn’t just a team. From the moment you joined, they’d taken you in like you belonged. You looked up to them, especially the older girls like Mapi, Alexia, and Ingrid.

They were always so strong, so put together. They didn’t let anything break them, at least not on the surface. You wanted to be like them—resilient, someone they could rely on. So you kept pretending everything was fine.

But lately, it wasn’t fine. At all.

You stared down at the test paper in front of you, the big red "D" at the top staring back at you like it was mocking you. Your heart pounded, and the edges of your vision blurred.

The classroom felt too loud, too bright, and your stomach twisted in knots. How were you going to fix this? How were you going to explain this to your teachers, your parents, your teammates?

You stuffed the paper deep into your bag, hoping no one would notice. But that didn’t make the problem go away.

---

That evening at practice, you couldn’t concentrate. Your passes were sloppy, your focus drifted, and your usual energy was nowhere to be found.

Mapi gave you a curious look at one point, raising an eyebrow in question, but you forced a smile and carried on. You could feel your mask cracking, though, and it was taking everything in you to keep it together.

“Everything okay?” Aitana asked as the team gathered to stretch at the end of training. You nodded quickly, not trusting yourself to say more. You could feel the lump forming in your throat, but you swallowed it down.

Once practice ended, the team started to disperse, heading to the locker rooms. You were the last to leave the field, hoping no one would notice how slow you were moving. You just needed a moment to collect yourself. Just a moment.

But Mapi was waiting for you at the entrance.

“Hey, you’ve been off all day,” she said, her voice casual but laced with concern. “What’s going on?”

“Nothing,” you muttered, avoiding her gaze. “I’m fine.”

She didn’t buy it. “You’re not fine. Talk to me.”

You wanted to, you really did. But the thought of burdening her with your problems made your chest tighten. You shook your head and started walking past her, hoping she’d drop it.

She didn’t.

“Hey, wait a second,” Mapi called after you, following closely behind. “What’s going on? You can tell me.”

“I said I’m fine!” you snapped, more harshly than you meant to. The second the words left your mouth, regret flooded through you. Mapi froze, her eyes widening in surprise, but she didn’t say anything.

You blinked back the tears that threatened to spill over. You couldn’t let her see you like this. “I… I’m sorry, I didn’t mean that,” you whispered, your voice shaky.

Mapi stepped closer, her expression softening. “It’s okay. But I know something’s wrong. You’re not yourself, and I’m worried about you.”

You bit your lip, debating whether to tell her. But before you could say anything, Mapi’s eyes flicked to your bag. The zipper was slightly open, and the corner of a crumpled piece of paper stuck out.

“What’s that?” she asked, reaching for the paper before you could stop her.

“No, wait—” you tried, but it was too late.

Mapi unfolded the test paper, her eyes scanning the red marks and the big “D” at the top. Her face fell, and she glanced back up at you, her expression unreadable.

“Is this what you’ve been hiding?” she asked softly.

You couldn’t hold it in anymore. The tears came fast, and you covered your face with your hands, trying to hide how embarrassed you felt. “I’m sorry,” you choked out. “I didn’t want you guys to know. I didn’t want to disappoint you.”

Mapi stepped forward, pulling you into a tight hug. “Disappoint us? Are you serious?”

You cried harder, unable to stop. “I’ve been messing up at school for weeks, and I’m trying, I swear, but I just can’t keep up. I thought I could fix it on my own, but it’s getting worse, and I’m so tired of pretending like I’m okay.”

Mapi didn’t let go, holding you close as you sobbed into her shoulder. She rubbed your back, her touch grounding you, reminding you that you weren’t alone.

“You don’t have to pretend with us,” she whispered. “You’re allowed to struggle, you’re allowed to ask for help. We love you no matter what.”

You stayed like that for a while, just letting yourself cry as Mapi held you. When your tears finally slowed, she pulled back and wiped your face with her sleeve.

“Come on, let’s get you cleaned up and talk to Ingrid and Alexia. We’ll figure this out together, okay?”

---

The walk to the locker room felt like forever, the weight of your shame still heavy on your shoulders. But when you walked in, it wasn’t judgment you were met with—it was concern and warmth.

Alexia was the first to notice. “What’s going on?” she asked, her eyes flicking between you and Mapi.

“She’s been having a hard time at school,” Mapi explained gently, not going into too much detail but saying enough for the others to understand.

Alexia frowned, crossing the room to stand beside you. “Why didn’t you tell us?”

You shrugged, still too embarrassed to meet her eyes. “I didn’t want to be a burden.”

“You could never be a burden,” Alexia said firmly, placing a hand on your shoulder. “We all go through hard times, and we help each other. That’s what family does.”

Ingrid, who had been listening quietly, came over and gave you a quick hug. “You’re not alone in this, okay? We’ve all struggled at some point. It doesn’t make you any less of a person.”

You felt a rush of gratitude towards them. You hadn’t realized just how much you’d needed to hear those words until now.

“Can you show us what you’re working on?” Ingrid asked gently. “Maybe we can help.”

The idea of letting them see your grades made your stomach twist, but you knew it would help to open up. Slowly, you pulled out your notebook and showed them the mess of notes, half-finished assignments, and crumpled test papers. It felt like exposing your vulnerabilities, and you braced yourself for their reactions.

“Wow, you’ve got a lot on your plate,” Mapi said, flipping through the pages. “This is more than just a few mistakes.”

“Yeah, it’s overwhelming,” you admitted, your voice small. “I thought I could handle it, but everything just feels… too much.”

Alexia nodded, her eyes filled with understanding. “It’s okay to feel overwhelmed. Sometimes, things pile up, and it can be hard to catch your breath. But that’s why we’re here. We can help you make a plan.”

“Let’s break it down together,” Ingrid suggested. “We’ll tackle one thing at a time. You don’t have to do this alone.”

As they started discussing strategies and ways to manage your workload, you felt a flicker of hope igniting within you. Maybe you could turn this around. With their support, it felt possible.

---

After a while, practice resumed, but this time, it was different. You felt lighter, bolstered by the knowledge that you weren’t alone. Mapi, Ingrid, and Alexia stayed close, offering encouragement and support as you practiced. Their presence was comforting, and it made the drills feel a little less daunting.

However, as the days went on, the school anxiety didn’t just disappear. It loomed over you, lurking in the corners of your mind. You began dreading going to class, fearing the possibility of more bad grades.

The panic bubbled beneath the surface, and each time a teacher handed back a paper, your heart raced, worrying about what mark would greet you this time.

One afternoon, during a particularly tough math class, you felt that panic rise again. You stared at the equations on the board, but they swirled into a jumbled mess. It felt like the walls were closing in. You glanced around at your classmates, who all seemed to understand while you were drowning in confusion.

The bell rang, signaling the end of class, and you rushed out of the room, needing fresh air. You felt trapped, your mind racing. The anxiety became too much, and the tears began to fall as you stepped into the hallway.

You pulled out your phone, scrolling through your contacts until you landed on Mapi’s name. Your fingers hovered over the screen as you hesitated, but you couldn’t hold it in any longer.

You called her, your heart pounding in your chest. When she answered, her voice was warm and welcoming. “Hey! What’s up?”

“I need help,” you managed to say, your voice shaky.

“Where are you? I’ll come get you,” Mapi said immediately, her tone turning serious.

“In school. I just… I can’t,” you said, and you felt a wave of shame wash over you again.

“Okay, I’m on my way. Just breathe, okay? You’re not alone.”

A few moments later, Mapi texted saying she was out front.

You walked outside, the cool air hitting your face like a refreshing splash of water. It felt calming, grounding. You took a deep breath, trying to collect yourself as Mapi looked at you with gentle eyes from the car as you sat down.

“Talk to me. What’s going on?”

You hesitated for a moment before spilling everything—the stress of school, the panic attacks, the feeling of inadequacy. It all came tumbling out, and Mapi listened patiently, her gaze unwavering.

“I thought I could handle it,” you said, your voice breaking. “But I just keep messing up, and I feel like I’m letting everyone down.”

“Hey, listen to me,” Mapi said firmly. “You’re not letting anyone down. We’re here for you, no matter what. It’s okay to struggle, and asking for help doesn’t make you weak. It makes you strong.”

You nodded, feeling a mix of relief and sadness. Mapi wrapped her arms around you, holding you close. You let the tears fall freely now, finally allowing yourself to feel all the weight that had been pressing down on you.

---

When you finally calmed down, Mapi pulled back and looked you in the eyes. “You’re going to get through this. We’re going to figure it out together. I promise.”

As you stood there, a little breathless from the outpouring of emotions, you knew she was right. You still had a long way to go, but now you didn’t have to do it alone.

Later that night, you texted Alexia and Ingrid to meet up for a study session. When they arrived, you felt a little spark of determination. You didn’t have to be perfect.

You just had to keep trying, and with the support of your teammates, you felt ready to face whatever came next.

The following days were still tough, but you faced them with the knowledge that you had your family beside you. Mapi, Ingrid, and Alexia always checked in, offering encouragement and reminding you that it was okay to lean on them when things got overwhelming.

After a few weeks of hard work, you started to see progress. Your grades began to improve, and while the anxiety still lurked in the background, you felt a little more in control. With every small victory, you gained a bit more confidence, a little more strength to face your challenges.

---

One evening after practice, you sat in the locker room with Mapi and Ingrid, laughing over something silly.

The warmth of camaraderie surrounded you, and for the first time in a long time, you felt light. The worries of school were still there, but you had a plan now, and you had people who believed in you.

“See? You’re doing amazing,” Mapi said, nudging you playfully. “I told you we’d figure it out.”

You smiled back at her, feeling the gratitude swell in your chest. “Thank you for being there for me.”

Ingrid added, “That’s what family is for. We lift each other up.”

As you shared stories and laughter with your teammates, you realized that while the journey ahead might still be tough, you wouldn’t have to face it alone.

With the support of your teammates, you knew you could tackle anything that came your way.

And in that moment, surrounded by the girls who had become your family, you felt a sense of peace wash over you. No matter what challenges lay ahead, you were ready to face them, one step at a time.

---

[brin-guivera]

I’ve got quite a few editions of the Caitlin Love trilogy but I’ve wanted these ‘window’ editions for a while so snapped them up when a lot popped up on eBay. They are almost mint condition too! I also got this vintage sci-fi book from @prudenceandthecrow - I am suitably intrigued… 📚 . . . #stackingtheshelves #90sbooks #80sbooks #bookhaul #bookishfeatures #bookstagramfeature #bookstagram #bookporn #bookphotography #booklr #bookblogger #bookaholic #bookish #bookstagrammer #teenreads #francinepascalbooks #patcbox #booknerd #bookhoarder #booksofinstagram #bibliophile #bookworm #vintageya #vintageteen #vintagebooks #vintage #retroreads #retro #retrobooks #nostalgia https://www.instagram.com/p/CpselEerLXA/?igshid=NGJjMDIxMWI=

[wileys-russo]

Hey could i request a fic?

Maybe one where teenreader who plays for barça or arsenal gets a nose piercing behind alexia or leahs back ?

just putting this in the same universe and reader as stuck tiny silver flash II barça femeni x teen!r

"there is one other place i wanna go!" you piped up as jana had her car keys in hand, both her and bruna's arms laden with shopping bags as you motioned for them to follow you.

"pollito is this going to take long? i think my arms are going to fall off!" bruna groaned as you rolled your eyes. "nobody told you to buy half the clothes in here bru, sounds like a you problem." you quipped making jana snicker and her best friend kick at her with a scowl.

"what are we doing here? are you getting a hair cut?" jana questioned with a frown as you stopped outside a local salon. "oo you should get bangs! or dye it pink, or blue, or purple, or red, or-" bruna started to ramble before jana's free hand covered her mouth with a sigh.

"not exactly." you smiled innocently as both of their eyes narrowed. "why do i get the feeling we're being dragged into one of her little trouble making schemes." bruna mumbled to jana once her mouth was freed again, jana nodding tiredly in agreement as they both continued in after you.

"wait here, i won't be long." you promised as a worker guided you off and out of their sights. "should we have let her go off with a stranger? is that bad babysitting? was that responsible?" bruna questioned after a minute had passed, jana just shrugging as the two of them took a seat just outside the store on a bench in the middle of the shopping complex.

though when you finally resurfaced it confirmed her question that yes, this was in fact bad babysitting.

"dios mio what is that in your face pequeña!" you rolled your eyes as jana dropped her bags and hurried over to grab your cheeks, turning your head left and right with wide eyes.

"its just a nose stud compañero!" you brushed off both her and bruna's fussing. "how did you do this? did you forge someones signature?" jana questioned again in disbelief. "fraud is a crime pollito, you could go to prison!" bruna added on with a gasp as again your eyes rolled.

"relájese! está bien chica's. you have to be eighteen for a tattoo, sixteen for a piercing." you corrected with a grin, having been planning this for awhile now.

"they are going to kill you so i hope it was worth it pollito." bruna sighed and she didn't have to drop a name for you to know exactly who she was talking about. "i will hide it till it heals, then if they make me take it out it will not close, ningún problema." you shrugged carelessly.

"but you cannot take it out for a few weeks while it heals, sí? what about games? training? you also live with capi!" jana asked, crossing her arms and staring down at you with narrowed eyes.

"engaño." you smiled patting to your shopping bag full of makeup, patting them both on the cheek and striding off toward the exit.

"dios mio jana i was right. she has dragged us into one of her little schemes! estamos tan muertos." bruna moaned throwing her head back and dragging her hands down her face.

"hey! listen to me amiga." brunas eyes widened as jana balled her top in her fists, holding her tightly and yanking her forward so they were nose to nose, the fear obvious in both their eyes.

"the story you posted today? delete it. the ticket for the parking? burn it. the new clothes you bought? hide them. nobody can ever, ever, ever know we brought her here bruna. vale?" jana warned sternly as bruna nodded frantically and her best friend let her go as they hurried after you.

"oye, compañero i think this might be worse than when we got her and vicky drunk at bowling and they threw up everywhere." "imbécil! bruna what part of 'never speak of it again' do you not understand??"

~

you'd managed to keep your secret for a whole whopping two days by the time training rolled around, which was a god given miracle considering you lived full time with your hawk eyed captain.

careful makeup blending and a flesh colored band aid you'd cut into a tiny circle had served well to hide your new addition, making sure to keep alexia at arms length so she couldn't get close enough to really look at you.

though she was so busy preparing for the weekends match and all the media that came with the el clásico it wasn't hard to slip under her radar for once.

but there was one person you worried might be able to see through your attempted deception, and of course she was the first person you ran into that morning at training, considering she had a nose piercing of her own.

trusting you enough to find your way to the change rooms once inside alexia had left you to your own devices as she hurried off for a quick meeting with all the captains, as was tradition the last session before a game.

"bon dia pollito!" you tried not to tense as aitana appeared beside you, having parked a few cars down in the lot from alexia. "hola tana." you greeted her with a smile, quick to snap your head back forward, grateful she was on your left side and the hidden stud on your right.

the two of you made small talk about your days off as you wandered through the training complex toward the change rooms, the girl of course taking every opportunity to tease you were shorter than her, something that was not very common for the midfielder in a team full of leggy spaniards and scandi's.

but as you turned to push her away and she tried to grab you in a headlock, you gave yourself up by accident.

"espere." the smile dropped from her face and you deflated as she grabbed your jaw, tilting your head back and immediately spotting the backing of the stud in your nostril with a small gasp of surprise.

"tana!" you whined trying to pull away as her grip tightened and she shook her head before letting you go. "estúpida, is this new?" aitana questioned, sending you a warning glare not to be dishonest.

"maybe." you mumbled, giving her a smile as charming as you could muster as she hummed and went to walk off. "don't tell anyone, por favor tana por favor! i will do anything." you zipped around to block her path and begged, clasping your hands together.

"anything?" "anything, promesa! just do not tell, especially not alexia." you pleaded desperately. "vale pollito, i will keep your little secret." aitana started as you breathed out in relief.

"but, for a price." aitana smiled and the twinkle in her eyes had your guard up a little but you knew she had you against the ropes. “and what’s that?” you asked albeit apprehensively.

“no more messing with my things, no more letting mapi mess with my things, no more waking me up on the bus or the plane or the train with the ‘oh tana im bored entertain me!’, no more kicking the ball at my head or the back of my seat, no more squirting water at me and no more giving me the finger with the ‘oh look tana a bird!’. vale?” the older girl raised an eyebrow sternly as you nodded rapidly.

“vale, vale, vale. gracias!” you sighed in relief, squishing her in a hug as she chuckled and patted your back before you let her go, the two of you resuming your walk to the change rooms.

entering the change rooms you flashed a few smiles around as you sat at your cubby, pulling off your trainers and stashing them away as you rifled through your training bag trying to find the medical tape you knew was in there, your ankle a little tight today.

"bon dia pequeña mentirosa." a body dropped next to you, mapi grinning and kissing your cheek as you gagged jokingly and pushed her away, her locker next to yours.

"stop that. i will do it!" mapi rolled her eyes at your attempts to tape up your ankle, pulling your leg up onto her lap as you handed the tape. "something troubling you pollito?" mariona dropped down on your other side with a concerned frown.

"no, just a little tight today." you shook your head as now both older girls gave you a look, mapi strapping up your ankle. "está bien. if it feels off at all i will go see the physios, happy?" you looked between them as they nodded, mario messing up your hair and heading off for the pitch.

eyes roaming around the now half empty change rooms you caught aitana's eye who was talking with keira, and judging from the very slight narrow of the english womans eyes as they studied your face for a mere second or so longer than normal, you knew right away what they were discussing.

you shook your head at the midfielders, aitana sending you an apologetic smile and hurrying off before you could say anything, dragging keira along with her as you prayed to the high heavens both girls kept their mouths shut.

"what?" mapi chuckled seeing the strange look on your face, finishing up your ankle and glancing over her shoulder to try and see what you were looking at. "nothing, gracias maps." you smiled, pulling your leg back down.

"ingrid!" you called out to her girlfriend who was passing by, the norweigan raising an eyebrow as you held up a hair brush and smiled charmingly. "you could not have asked alexia at home?" ingrid chuckled as mapi kissed her cheek briefly and headed off to the pitch.

"alexia cannot even do her own hair, takes her about half an hour to slick it up into a ponytail." you rolled your eyes as ingrid started to brush through your hair, a comfortable silence falling between both of you as the rest of the team slowly filtered out.

"the baby can't do her own hair? awww." lucy teased, playfully kicking at your ankles with a grin as you tried to grab at her but winced as ingrid tugged on your hair in warning, still halfway through braiding it.

"oni!" you called out to your friend who turned around. "your girlfriend needs her leash and collar, she's acting out again." you sniped, lucy squaring up to you before ona rolled her eyes and pulled her away, chatsizing her quietly as lucy sent you a menacing glare as you gav her a fake scared face.

"you need to stop hanging around with maría so much liten, she is a bad influence." ingrid tapped your shoulders as she finished your hair. "she's your girlfriend!" you laughed as you stood, tucked into her side as the taller girls arm draped across you.

"i know, and every day she gives me reason to question why." ingrid sighed as you bumped into her. "no way, you two are so in love its disgusting." you gagged as ingrid playfully reached round to pinch your cheek.

"you will be in love one day liten, and i will be sure to remind your future partner that you think love is disgusting!" ingrid teased, letting go of you as you both smiled and gave a good morning to the social media admin filming the training arrivals.

"how do you know i'm not in love now? or that i will need a future partner?" you gave her a cheeky smile as her eyes widened. "are you-" you'd raced off before she could ask her question, the girl yelling after you that this conversation wasn't over.

"hola!" you launched yourself and near took jana down to the ground, her hands grabbing your thighs and hoisting you up into a proper piggyback with a grunt.

"i was thinking things were too quiet pollito, i was hoping you were sick and we might get a day off from babysitting." jana sighed dramatically as you scoffed. "babysitting! you need babysitting not me." you accused making her chuckle.

"i have to say pollito, you did a good job. if i did not know that you had the stud, i would not notice." bruna marvelled as jana promptly dropped you and grabbed the pair of you by the shirt, dragging you away from the rest of the group.

"what part of we do not speak of it did you not understand? nobody can know we took her there or that we knew about the stud!" jana warned bruna sternly who huffed and tried to pray her hands off her top.

"and you will not tell a soul we knew about it amiga, vale?" jana turned to you now, letting go of bruna and raising an eyebrow when you didn't speak, a roll of your eyes and a nod following.

"perfecta. remember compañero's, when in doubt; deny, deny, deny."

~

now your makeup and band aid combo may have done the trick for training, nobody batting so much as an eyelid of suspicion toward you.

but what you hadn't accounted for was your teammates being...themselves.

case in point; the water fight which broke out after training was finished.

you didn't think much of it at first, ducking out of the way of mapi's attack and launching your own on cata, laughing as patri and pina used you as a human shield, spraying lucy and mario over your shoulder as you copped the brunt of their own counter attack.

"vale! that is enough for today." alexia yelled out over the squabbles, though there was a hint of a smile on her face and you hadn't missed her spray her own bottle at a few of the younger girls when they weren't looking.

distracted by the feeling of your now soaking wet training top clinging uncomfortably to your body you snatched a towel off mapi, drying your face and arms and not giving it a second though.

that was when there was a tiny silver flash as your stud caught the sun and all hell broke loose.

"what is that?!" "a piercing?!" "who did that to you?!" "what did you put in your face?!" "you put a hole in your skin?!" "who said you could do that pollito?!"

your eyes widened at the questions fired at you one after the other, shrinking into yourself and starting to back away as the older girls advanced, mouths moving at rapid pace.

"don't you dare!" paños grabbed the back of your collar, snagging you as you tried to bolt, a hiss of pain leaving your mouth as alexia grabbed your ear next, dragging you inside and all sorts of angry spanish leaving her mouth.

"sit!" alexia pushed you to sit down at your cubby, flanked by ingrid, paños, irene and frido all glaring down at you. "when?" irene asked sternly as you huffed. "when what." you tried, the stony glares causing your stomach to flip.

"acting cute won't get out out of this one älska. the truth! now." frido warned sternly as you sighed, catching a few of the younger girls watching on curiously, but they all scattered as alexia met them with a hard stare.

"i got it on monday." you answered, looking down at the ground and pulling one knee to your chest, picking at your laces. "where?" alexia asked sharply. "a hair salon." you shrugged still refusing to look up but feeling their eyes burn into you.

"why?" ingrid questioned next. "looks cool and i can." you mumbled with a roll of your eyes. "don't you roll your eyes, drop the attitude." alexia warned as you huffed and mocked her quietly under your breath, whining as her hand smacked the back of your head.

"that hurt!" you rubbed it with a scowl as she now rolled her own eyes. "cannot have hurt more than putting a needle through your face pequeña." irene added on with a scoff as you fell silent again.

"i think it looks badass pollito." pina piped up from a few seats down, paling at the looks it earned her and hurrying over to hide behind patri.

"sí i agree, makes her look tough. which is hard with this cute little baby face!" mapi cooed as she appeared now, pinching your cheeks and admiring the small stud with a nod of approval that had you grinning.

"maría! stay out of it." alexia barked as the girl rolled her eyes, one of the few who wasn't scared (most times) of your fierce captain. "why? she is sixteen now. i had ear piercings at five!" mapi brushed off the issue ignoring her girlfriends eyes baring into her.

"ear sí, not face!" alexia scoffed crossing her arms across her chest. "its not like i got a forehead piercing, so dramatic." you muttered, shrinking and shuffling across a little closer to mapi at the glares which met it

"would you like to say that a little louder?" ingrid sent you a challenging look as her girlfriend wrapped an arm around you. "leave the nena be, it is one little stud. relajarse!" mapi waved them off again.

"who took you to get it nena? you do not drive." paños asked firmly as you couldn't help but let your eyes flicker briefly to jana and bruna who were frantically shaking their heads and waving their arms about. "deny, deny, deny!" jana mouthed at you.

but all it took was that brief millisecond for irene's head to snap around, catching both younger girls in the act as they froze. "you went shopping with the idiotas on monday!" alexia realised as now her head snapped around.

"we didn't know she was gonna do it we took our eyes off her for like a minute and she came back with it! promesa!" bruna blurted out as jana winced and smacked her hand against her forehead.

"you are the worst secret keeper ever!" jana hissed, both of them sprinting off as paños and irene chased after them. "you are taking it out älska." frido stated bluntly as you frowned. "no way!" you protested with a shake of your head.

"yes way. we can do this the easy way or the hard way älska, your choice." the swede warned as alexia and ingrid hummed their agreement and seeing them start to advice mapi's arm left you and she slid slowly away.

"mapi!" you gasped as she darted away. "traitor and a coward!" you yelled after her as she made a heart with her hands and hid behind lucy who rolled her eyes and pushed her away.

"easy or hard nena, choose." alexia warned firmly as you shook your head. "its not coming out, i paid for this!" you decided firmly, standing and holding your head high, hearing a few of the other girls whistle and shake their heads at your words.

"you get her legs, i get her arms, ale takes it out." frido instructed, all three girls nodding as you attempted a getaway, trying to climb up and over the small retaining wall of your cubby but being promptly dragged back down and restrained.

"did you even wash your hands! this is unsanitary alexia i could get an infection!" you yelled trying to squirm away but with no luck as alexia held your head still with one hand and you winced as with one little twist she'd plucked the stud from your nose.

"when we get home i'm searching your room for any other studs and they are being flushed down the toilet. get your bag!" alexia warned as you kicked away ingrid and frido with a scowl. "you're both on my list." you warned seriously, cata and salma oooohing at your words.

"you don't scare us liten." ingrid laughed unbothered, frido mirroring her expression with a smirk. "remember when mario lost an eyebrow? she was on my list." you spoke calmly, packing your belongings up.

"or when pina's cubby had that awful ant infestion? or patris car tyres kept magically deflating? also on my list." you slung your bag over your shoulder, smiling at the somewhat apprehensive looks now present on the tall scandis face.

"adios, traitors." you patted their shoulders as you passed, following after alexia. "pollito are we still on for-" mapi fell silent as your head whipped toward her. "you are also on the list, maría." you warned calmly, narrowing your eyes.

"i helped you create that list!" mapi gasped in disbelief. "sí, and now the student has become the master." you pointed at her menacingly, alexia growing impatient and grabbing you by the straps of your bag hauling you out of the change room.

"vamos pequeña, stop threatening everyone." alexia chuckled dragging you out with her to the carpark as you waved goodbye to a few of the staff, the older girl amused at how quickly your demeanor changed.

"they were not threats, they were promises." you huffed with a deep frown, kicking at a rock. "are you going to be moody and pouty all afternoon over a tiny little stud? estúpida." alexia cooed as you glared at her, sliding into the now unlocked cupra and tossing your bag in the back.

"do you want to be on the list ale?" you warned, shrinking at the fierce glare which it rewarded you with. "discúlpame?" the blonde asked scarily calm with a raised eyebrow. "nothing, lo siento." you mumbled sinking into her seat as she smirked and started up the car.

"buena nena, thats what i thought you said."

[katnisspeetaprim]

Father Figure

Lucifer Morningstar/Platonic!TeenReader

Summary: You'd had a hard time in the sort while you'd been alive, so when your new boss shows you kindness like you've never seen, you can't help but be suspicious...

Warnings: Platonic relationship, teenage fem reader, implied drug use, implied sex work, implied underage sex, dead beat parents, assault, swearing, panic attack, crying, angst, fluff A.N; not sure if I will write a part 2 yet, see how this does!

Word Count: 3102 Hazbin M.list

Hell was a scary place for someone like you. Being a teenager in Hell was less than ideal.

Your parents were useless, always too coked out of their minds to care for you, so you left.

Due to your unfortunate circumstances, you had to resort to some... less than kosher means to survive. It was awful, but it’s all you could do.

One night, one of your clients wouldn’t take no for an answer so when you tried to fight back, things went bad for you.

So here you were.

Luckily, under princess Morningstar’s new work programme, all new sinners would be provided with a job to get them started, if they accepted the help that is. And that’s how you came to be the King of hell’s live in maid.

You’d finally found your way to the mansion, after getting lost multiple times. You felt somewhat intimidated as you stood before the large doors. It just now hit you that you’d be working for the devil himself. The thought made your blood run cold. Why would they give such a high profile job to someone like you? Maybe because you wouldn’t be able to cause any trouble? Either way you couldn’t back out now.

Swallowing back your nerves, you raised a hand and knocked on the door.

Almost immediately the door swung open to reveal a short man, who seemed a little too keen to interact with you.

‘Why hello there! Something I can help you with?’... Was he waiting by the door?

‘I uh- I was told to come here to work?’ You handed him your work certificate, and he quickly scanned it over before breaking out into a smile.

‘Wow! I didn’t expect to get someone so soon!’ It was only after Lucifer read the paper, did he properly look at you. His smile faltered slightly.

‘Uh sorry to be blunt, but you look a little... young?’

‘Well I’m 16.’ You laughed nervously. ‘Is that not ok? I promise I’ll be a good worker!’ Lucifer frowned deeply at your sudden panicked rambling.

It wasn’t uncommon for people to die young, but to end up in Hell?

He knew Earth could be a terrible place, but what could you have done at such a young age to end up here.

‘No no! Just me thinking out loud haha.’ Lucifer quickly backtracked. ‘Please come in.’ He moved to allow you to pass by, now smiling again. You entered, realising you were only slightly shorted than him as you passed by.

Maybe working for the Devil wouldn’t be as scary as you thought.

‘You have no idea how long I’ve needed a maid. I hate cleaning!’ He sighed out dramatically.

Over the coming months, you’d settled well into your job. You suppose you had it easy when it came to jobs in Hell. Cleaning was pretty easy.

Lucifer mostly left you to your own devices, thinking you wouldn’t want to hang out with an old man like him, but that didn’t mean he didn’t make an effort with you.

The first time he approached you in the middle of the day, was to gift you a mobile phone.

‘Hey!’ He slid up to you out of nowhere, making you jump out of your skin. ‘Realised you don’t have a phone! Can’t check in if you don’t have one of those!’ You weren’t used to receiving gifts with no strings attached, But Lucifer didn’t seem to have ulterior motives, so you tentatively accepted.

‘Oh! I’ll even give you my daughters number! You two will get on like a house on fire!’

Another encounter was on an evening. Lucifer was finishing up his supper, when he aught sight of you scurrying round the foyer. He called out for you to come over.

‘Have you eaten yet? It’s getting pretty late...’ You couldn’t help but feel touched that he was seemingly looking out for you.

‘I still have a lot to do... I’m a little behind today...’ You trailed off, worried about being scolded for being tardy.

‘Nonsense! Please join me, there’s way too much for just me anyway.’ Lucifer insisted, jumping up and pulling a chair out for you.

‘Are you sure that’s ok?’ You asked, still a little reserved of his kindness.

‘Of course! Always happy for the company.’

Lucifer could read you like a book. He knew you were still nervous and skeptical of him, but he couldn’t blame you. He still didn’t know the circumstances for you to end up in Hell, plus you were so young, it would take a lot to trust.

Even though you worked for him, Lucifer couldn’t help but feel protective of you.

One of the more recent incidents, was when you got hurt.

The house chef was running out of ingredients, so he asked you to run out and grab them. You happily agreed since you didn’t really have any reason to leave the house otherwise.

Ok. Maybe you’d gone a little over bored, you thought as you juggled the heavy bags in your arms.

‘Hey baby! Need some help with those?’ You looked over and saw a group of 3 men leering at you. You smiled nervously and said ‘ No thank you.’ Before turning round, hoping to get away without any trouble.

‘Hey do you know who your talking to? Don’t be rude!’ One of the men grabbed your arm, causing you to drop your bags.

‘Don’t touch me!’ You screamed out, trying to pry your arm from his grip.

‘We were just offering to walk you home lady, but if you want to get down here, that’s fine by us.’ The second man sneered at you with a smirk as he grabbed your face hard.

Your eyes widened at his words. You were now struggling even more, to no avail. The final man cam up behind you and grabbed your other arm in an attempt to keep you still.

‘Stop struggling will ya!’ The man in front of you spat out, shaking you by the arm. He shook you so violently, that the long sleeve of your dress began to rip. You took advantage of this. Pulling your arm back so hard, your sleeve came off in his hand.

The attacker behind you hadn’t been expected you to fall backwards, so he lost his grip on your arm, giving you just enough time to book it in the direction of Lucifer’s home.

You could hear them running and shouting after you, but you didn’t look back. It wasn’t far now. You just had to make it back to the house and you’d be safe.

Bursting through the main doors, you immediately fell to your knees and cradled your head in your hands as you hyperventilated.

‘Y/N!? What the Hell happened?’ Lucifer had heard the slam of the door so he came out to investigate. He hadn’t expected to find you having a panic attack in his entrance hall.

He was kneeling by your side in an instant, placing a comforting hand on your back. As he looked closer at you, he saw that your sleeve was ripped, with a bruise forming round your wrist. When you looked up at him with wide, teary eyes he also clocked some bruises on your jaw.

Lucifer’s eyes immediately darkened.

‘’m sorry I-I lost the groceries...’ You stuttered out with a shaky voice.  Lucifer’s face immediately contorted.

‘Y/N I don’t give a damn about the groceries! I want to know who did this to you.’ Lucifer was aware of how angry he sounded, but he was honestly offended that you thought he cared more about some groceries than you.

You cowered slightly at his raised voice and Lucifer felt bad. He took a deep breath to calm down before speaking again, much more softly this time.

‘Please Y/N, I need to know who did this.’

You looked up to him and you could see the genuine concern in his eyes. You tried your best to get your sobs under control so you could speak.

‘There was a-a group of three rough looking guys not far from here...’ Lucifer groaned internally. He knew exactly who you were talking about.

They were a group that had been causing trouble round the are for a while now, but he never had a good enough reason to get rid of them... Until now.

Lucifer stood and extended a hand to you with a smile. You hesitantly took his hand and he helped you to your feet.

‘Go get cleaned up ok? I gotta go out for a while.’ He ushered you towards your room.

‘Ok...’ You trailed off sadly.

‘Great!’ Lucifer grinned widely at you as he opened a portal. He stepped through before leaning his head back out to address you.

‘And I don’t want to see you doing house work when I get back, kay?’ he tipped his hat before dashing back through. Then the portal closed.

‘Evening gentlemen.’ The three men from earlier swiftly jumped up from their card game, to see Lucifer leaning up against the wall, blocking the exit to the alley. They all immediately shrunk back when they saw it was him.

‘oh your majesty... What brings you to our hideout?’ Lucifer started to slowly walk into the alley, never tearing his eyes away from the men, making them even more on edge.

‘Uh-sir?’

‘So you think it’s fun to assault kid’s huh?’ Lucifer spoke in an eerily calm voice. The men looked at each other, now sweating profusely.  They all immediately tried to deny the accusations, but Lucifer wasn’t having it.

‘Keep your filthy mouths shut!’ His demonic form began manifesting as his anger grew. ‘You dare lay your hands on someone I care about!?’

The men were no longer tough bullies, but now reduced to a quivering mass with their backs to the wall as Lucifer stalked forwards.

A smirk appeared on his face as he narrowed his eyes at the men.

‘What do you say I give a demonstration of how Hell got it’s reputation?’

Screams echoed from the alley. People knew better than to intervene.

Lucifer returned home not much later, making a bee line for your room straight away.

He was about to knock on your door, when he heard faint crying coming from the other side.

He looked down remorsefully. Maybe he shouldn’t have left you alone. He composed himself and knocked. The sobs went quiet and he heard a meek, ‘come in.’

As he entered, he noticed you’d changed from your maid outfit and now wore your pyjamas and dressing gown.

‘Hey Y/N, you feeling any better?’ He came to sit next to you with a comforting smile.

‘I guess so...’ You replied, though the defeated look was still evident on your face.

‘Well golly! I have something to turn that frown upside down!’ You were startled by his sudden energetic proclamation. ‘Ta-da!’ He pulled a small duck from his coat pocket and proudly presented it to you.

You looked over the duck, which had obviously been made to resemble you by giving it some of your features.

As you looked at the little yellow duck, something inside of you snapped. Without warning, you batted the duck from his hand and jumped up in a fury, scowl painted across your face.

‘Why are you acting like you care about me!?’ Lucifer jumped up as if you’d burnt him, his hands out in front of him as a peaceful gesture. He was stunned at your sudden outburst.

‘Y/N, I don’t thi-‘

‘Don’t try and lie to me! Nobody’s ever cared about me!’ You cut him off. You were getting more irate as you broke down into hysterics again.

Lucifer didn’t know what to say. He opened his mouth to speak, but he couldn’t find the words to speak.

When he didn’t answer, it only made you more angry.

‘What do you want from me!?’ You screamed at him, tears flowing down your face. ‘Is it sex? Is that what you want from me, just like everyone else!?’

Lucifer audible gasped at your outburst and took a step back to show he meant no harm.

‘Whoa kid! I don’t want anything from you! Especially not...’ Lucifer couldn’t bring himself to say it. Everything began to fall into place for him now. So that’s what you had to do back on Earth.

He was angry that you accused him of being that disgusting, but not at you. He could never hate you. He was angry that there were people on Earth that thought it was ok to take advantage of a child like that.

You froze in place. The way he was keeping his distance, the way he was making himself look small so as to not intimidate you... Then there was his eyes. They were sad.

They bore into you, as if he were pleading with you to believe him. He wasn’t lying.

Your eyes stung with tears and your face heated up as you looked away, embarrassed by your outburst.

Lucifer wanted to comfort you, but he also didn’t want to spook you, so you needed to make the first move.

You mumbled something under your breath he couldn’t quite hear.

‘I uh, didn’t catch that...’ You squinted your eyes and let out a shaky breath, as if hyping yourself up to repeat what you had said.

You looked him dead in the eye, face hard as you repeated yourself.

‘I said I wish I were your daughter! My life would have been so much better.’

Lucifer was gobsmacked. He really hadn’t been expecting that. When he really thought about it he realised he shouldn’t be that surprised at all. He knew you had to have a rough life, and with how welcoming and caring he’d been to you, he should have know something like this would manifest.

The more Lucifer thought it over, the bigger his hear swelled. You thought so highly of him, that you wanted him to be your dad, or fatherly figure at least.

It seemed that Lucifer took a few moments too many to digest this information, as you turned away from him abruptly. He could see you shaking.

‘I’m sorry....’ You whispered.

Lucifer was snapped back to reality by your voice. You were clearly still upset, but he couldn’t stop the smile from spreading  across his face.

He made his way over to you and gingerly placed a hand on your shoulder, so as to not startle you, but you still flinched at the contact.

‘Y/N... You’ve nothing to be sorry for.’ Lucifer spoke so softly that it took you off guard. You couldn’t see his face, but you could tell by the tone of his voice that he was smiling.

‘It wasn’t till recently that I repaired my relationship with Charlie.’ You were rooted to the spot as you listened intently to what he was saying. ‘ I wasn’t there for a long time, and I truly regret how much time I missed with her.’ Your face was cast down as you hung onto every word.

You felt so stupid bringing this up. He already had a daughter that he loved, so you would just get in the way. Maybe this was his way of letting you down gently.

Lucifer moved to stand next to you, with his arm now across your shoulders. As you looked up to him, you were stunned to see him smiling. You almost passed out at his next words.

‘But maybe I can be there for you.’ More tears started to stream down your face, but this time they were tears of joy. For the first time in a long time, you felt truly happy.

Flinging your arms round his torso, you buried your head into his chest as you clung to him for dear life.

Lucifer happily returned your embrace and lay his head a top yours.

‘I’m sorry we couldn’t get here sooner.’ He soothed as he stroked the top of your head. You pulled back and looked up to him with a slight laugh.

‘You mean I should have died sooner?’ Lucifer cringed and pulled away, playfully throwing his hands up in the air.

‘Well of course it’s gonna sound morbid if you say it like that!’ You both laughed together and you wiped the tears from under your eyes.

Something caught Lucifer’s eye from across the room. It was the small duck he’d previously offered you.

You watched without a word as he retrieved the gift. He stood before you and offered it once again with a wide grin. This time you gratefully accepted.

Cupping your hands round the small toy, you held it up next to your face.

‘Great likeness.’ You joked and Lucifer snorted out in laughter.

‘I’m glad you like it! You know when you knocked it away, I thought you were highly offended with how I portrayed you, so good to know that’s not the case!’ He teased and gae you a thumbs up.

‘Thank you.’

‘Well.’ Lucifer spun round, making his way to the door before pausing to speak over his shoulder. ‘Thanks to todays surprising turn of events, I need to hire a new maid.’ He paused for a moment before turning back round to fully face you. ‘Can’t have my honorary daughter run ragged , now can I?’

Later that night after both of you had taken some much needed time to calm down, Lucifer had made you sit at the dining table, whilst he served you for a change. Once you were both settled, he took the opportunity to press you a little.

‘So did you ever reach out to Charlie like I said a while ago?’ You chuckled nervously and rubbed at the back of your neck.

  ‘I didn’t really think it would be appropriate.’

‘Ah come one now, I was the one who bought it up! Plus I think it would be good for you.’

‘How so?’ You titled your had curiously and Lucifer sank back into his chair with a breathy laugh.

‘Charlie showers literally everyone she meets with love, and she’ll introduce you to loads of new friends.’

‘But-‘ You stopped yourself, really thinking weather or not you should even ask. ‘Will she even want to meet me?’ Lucifer’s face softened into a warm smile. He knew exactly what you were thinking. You were scared that Charlie would want nothing to do with you, considering the way you saw him now.

He sat up and reached over, giving your shoulder a comforting squeeze.

‘I grantee it.’