#ted doesnt hate his kids either

[thefirstlioveyou]

i get very upset when i get to the part where ted suggests they go down and talk to mike about witnessing his best friend's dead body, and karen suggests they just wait for him to come to them. (spoiler alert: he never actually does... so they never do either)

oh and then the least she can do is let him stay home from school. but then - as she's telling him she's going to comfort and check on barb's parents (not him) - she invites him to just tag a log and just read a book, as she gives someone else who isn't her son the time of day to talk about everything going on. but it's ok because she'll let him pick out an r rated movie, right?

giving your kids physical gifts is something some parents like to do to substitute for the emotional care they're struggling to provide, and that's clearly what's happening here.

i love karen, and I can't wait to see her development next season. but this is part of her character - her avoidance of things is crucial to understanding her character and understanding the wheelers overall next season. only hugging her kids isn't being there for them. and it's not like she isn't aware - she knows it's wrong! we see her actively TRY and change this, but struggles to because this is something that needs to be tackled with her husband! but he's. not. there. either. she doesn't know HOW to fix this.

but she - and the whole family - will learn to next season

[ktchie]

'It's the hope that kills you'

Ted Lasso x Reader

Fluff and Angst

♡ other tags: attempt at humour/ no proof read we die like Rupert should've / possible part two

♡6.1k words

◇ In which Y/n wanted to confessed and Ted has a pastel pink apron.

•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°

She consider herself as a tough independent woman who rather die and be beheaded than show any ounce of feelings or a hint of affection.

Her therapist said it's because she grew up in a household that doesn't show much emotion or any vulnerability. And they're right, she remember the time she saw her Dad shed a tear on the night of her high-school graduation, hiding behind his hands and cool dad stance before abruptly going to the bathroom and staying there for 40 minutes - he came back with red eyes and a terrible pun joke. As if nothing had happened.

So it is perfectly understandable that she grew up hating vulnerability, choosing to stay rigid and emotionless rather to have her whole soul on the palm of her hand. It doest help either that she's the eldest kid, the pillar of her siblings, the one who lays awake at night thinking any and every problems her parents throw at her way, worrying about it to the point her chest hurt and she has to learn to calm panic attack in such a young age.

So that being said, she never really had the full experience of romance or being in a relationship. She flirted with a few men on her lives and had fucked them plenty of times but she never really did the whole holding hands thing and all that cheesy stuff that people always whined about once the clock hits 10 and loneliness hits you like a freight train.

But meeting Ted, meeting Ted makes her want to dive head first on whatever corny things couples do in this day of age. Whether it be kissing on the rain or robbing a bank at 2pm in a Sunday afternoon.

She stared at him from across her, sitting so patiently like an overgrown child with a cup of steaming hot coffee.

"Something you need, Ted?" Her tone of voice held nothing but pure professionalism that made her quietly hissed.

Ted looked at her with his big brown eyes that makes her heart all googoo gaga, she sometimes wonder if Ted is secretly part of some hidden government group because she swore that puppy eyes could stop a international fued.

"Oh you know, just wanna visit ya'" he stated with a cheeryness only he can produced in the morning, all dimple and wide smiles. "'been awhile since I saw you, thought you're actually avoiding me but boss said that you're six feet under with all the work you got goin' on"

She chuckled at his words "Ted, I don't think there's anything in this world that could keep me away from you" she answered with a subtle smile, if she wanted him she would get him, whether it be by words or thousand of prayers.

Ted looked at her silently, wide eye and a blossoming blush on his cheeks. He looks ethereal underneath the early morning sun, a fallen single strand of hair dangling on his forehead that makes her hand itch with yearn to fix it.

"But I have been awfully neglectful to the rest of you, haven't I?" She decided to move on from her flirting (?), she doesnt want Ted to dropped dead on the floor from all the blood on his head. "I've been busy these past few weeks, but Will told me about the team plan get together on Sam's restaurant. I'll make sure to attend it, even shoulder the payment if we can get Sam to give us the bill"

Ted nodded his head, tounge tied for once, some part of her rejoiced while the other part, the one who always fear rejection and if she's being too much or too stupid, fear for whatever friendship they have (or had, if worse comes to worse)

"I-well" he cleared his throat, looking at her through his weirdly long eyelashes that always made her tear up in awe and envy.

"We can uh' y'know, we can split the bill, don't hav'ta shoulder it all by yourself"

"No its alright" she shook her head, she contemplate touching his arms, feel the soft fabric of his awfully comfy looking sweater and the skin underneath it but she decided not to, Ted might freak the fuck out and leave the room yelling 'HR! HR!' And have her fired and be shamed by the rest of the Richmond community for touching their beloved American wanker. "Consider it as my payment for forgetting to visit the locker room"

"Wasn't your fault, anyway" he shrugged before gesturing to the tower of folders and impending blueprints for the upcoming renovations and building upgrades. "I mean take a look at that, the great mt. Everest would cry if he saw this monstrosity. Even looking at it makes my stomach all funky" he shudder at its sight. "Do you even take a break? Jeez."

She sighed and leaned back on her office chair "from time to time, 15 minutes or 5. I like to finish my work early so.."

Ted frowned, he has one of those upset looks that makes her heart clenched and crack little by little until it exploded on her chest and she has to pretend she wasn't in pain so he could view her as a normal human being and not a lovesick teenager. "Ya should take a better care of yourself, you can't just go 'n on 'n on workin' till you drop dead" if it's possible, his doe eyes turned even more sadder. " its not good for you"

She bit her lip, her thighs moving up and down underneath her desk. She never liked it when he's anything but happy. "I can go take a rest when I go home and take a rest some more once I finish of all this work. its fine, don't worry too much about me"

"How can I not worry about you?" Ted leaned in, sad eyes and furrow brows. "Youre my-" he sighed before he shake his head "heck, If I had known you're over 'ere slowly killin' yourself i would have yank you from your desk till you're screamin' and cryin'"

Screaming and crying huh? Oh she can do that, alright.

"Ted.." she sighed, trying her hardest to ease the furrow on his brows "its fine, im fine. Don't worry about me too much. there's another game coming up, thats what you should be focusing on yeah?"

Ted sighed deeply, leaning back on the chair before nodding. A lock of hair fell down on his forehead, perfect it was, and y/n thought he never looked more beautiful then. She wonder if Ted kept his hair perfectly gel all the time or if he had ever let his guard down on the four walls he had been forcely call his home.

She would love to see him just him, just Ted, with his goofy smiles and bad puns and old reference from a bad film made years before.

She would love to love him, flaws and imperfections and bad days. She would paint him beautifully, perfect at every stroke of her brush and no smudge of mistakes and yet she knows she still wouldn't do him justice. Ted is just too perfect, too lovely, too godly to be even be depicted on a rough white canvas of this wretched world. Ted deserves to be painted in the walls of the church, or at every thread of the clouds, he was meant to be seen and to be watched and to be memorize until his kindness and his generosity and smile are engraved deep within everyone's heart. Y/n wanted to worship Ted with utmost devotion that her mouth would utter prayers like a second breath, until her two pressed hands bleed and flowers grow between her palm.

She watched him sat across her, his gaze darting everywhere on the carpet before a smile slowly broke on his lips, eyes suddenly lighting up and whole body perking up.

"Hey" he looked up to her, grin and joyful gaze "guess what I cooked last night" he had said giddily

"if you get it right I might just have to take a peek on that ridiculous sitcom you've always buggin' me to watch"

She scoffed, offended. "Modern family is not ridiculous, it's the best thing that ever happened to television-"

"Now hol' up. You're gettin' ahead of yourself now, sugar" she pretended the pet name didnt make her stomach flip and twist and did all kinds of wwe wrestling stunt. 

"I'll have you know that you're wrong, there are tons of- you know what, I ain't even gonna argue with you because we're both too tired for this and I'm too excited to tell you what I cooked last night, so just guess, come on"

She squinted her eyes before sighing as she started to think. "Well, last time we spoke you wouldn't shut up about barbecue and kebab and that one burger that sounds like it could kill you from one sniff"

"Triple cheese burger with bacon crisp, 3 sunny side eggs and curly fries dipped in ranch and garlic sauce with side on-"

"Sounds awful. Americans and their ridiculous food, seriously how are you not dead yet?"

Ted had shrugged with a sickeningly sweet smile "have no idea, but its good 'n ya know what they say 'enjoy life while it lasted'"

"Curse that qoute for manipulating you, let's just pray you wouldn't drop dead in the middle of the court because we can't handle your decaying body and another lose at the same time"

"You betcha! Now guess what I cooked!" Ted was almost jumping from his seat, propping his head on his palm as he stared at her.

"Come on, now"

"Curry"

"No"

"Friend chicken?"

"Nope, but boy I would love to have that right now"

"Salad?"

"Heck no! You kiddin' me?"

"Uhhh, curry?"

"You already said that!" Ted pouted lightly and she almost reach out to trace the bottom of his lips and mumbled how sweet he look right now but thankfully she stopped herself.

"Allright I give up" she threw her hand up and sigh "anything you cooked is fantastic anyway, doesn't matter what it is"

"Oh, arent you a sweetheart" he smiled at her so adorably it made her tooth ache. "I'm glad you think so because I just cooked f/f!" Ted yelled so excitedly, arms spread wide and eyes bright.

She looked at him with agape mouth

"F/f? Are you serious?" She grinned so widely, it has been awhile since she tasted it, mainly because the only f/f she had ever ate is the one her mother cooks.

"Course! I wouldn't lie to ya!" Ted had stated "I couldn't get some shut eyes last night so I decided to make it, better to do something than nothin' at all am I right?"

She's still looking at him, as if in trance. "Wow Ted..I mean im pretty fucking pump but-well, why did you make it? You could have baked, you usually bake when you have nothing to do"

Ted looked away from her, cheeks suddenly getting warm and pink under the sunlight. "Oh you know..just miss ya' I guess"

Her heart crumbled and melted inside of her chest, she could feel its warmth drip from every nerve she has and settle deep within her guts and lay there until she has to curl her toes in a pathethic attempt to calm herself down.

He took a peek at her under his lashes. "I was so used seeing you every darn morning 'ere so it makes me all sad and upset when I don't. Even coach beard had to knock some sense in to me, told me to keep my marbles together or else he'll hide my barbecue sauce" he lightly chuckled "pretty heavy threat, if you ask me"

"I didnt know you miss me so much"

"Are you kiddin' me? I miss ya a hell'ava lot more than 'much'" Ted had almost yelled "i miss ya more than Roy misses running! And thats alot"

She laugh quietly, both in amusement and the tickling feeling deep on her stomach that normal people (with normal amount of love on their heart) would refer as butterflies, but for her, for someone who love too deep and too vast and too much and for a girl like her that grew up reading stories and fairy tales and movies characters with soft confession under bright stars and harsh rains, she could refer the feeling on her stomach as a clawing beast, a magnificent one born on legends and shaky words of the fear locals, with a ferocious growl and wild eyes and fangs as big as a tallest house.

In short, everytime Ted does something so adorably lovely on her eyes she could feel the entire animals on her stomach.

She looked at him with a gentle smile, eyes bright and so so soft - looking at him a like proper lover would. "I miss you too, Ted" she had said almost like a whisper, like a sin. "More than you could ever know"

The statement sounded too intimate, the tone too romantic to be said between casual friends and even the silence after it could be written in a pages of old romance stories - describe it like moment after the music, where the two of them stares at one another with that yearning look that makes all the reader sick to their stomach.

Her words sounds like a confession, one that is so gentle even the gods up above would melt where they stood. She didn't utter the proper words of 'i love you' and didn't open her palm where her bleeding heart lay and offer it to him with a desperation - but the way she said her words, the way every letter soud so much like a sudden whisper in a night of passion and sudden realization of devotion and adoration makes her statement more than a confession - as if it was an oath, a promise set on stone. Like a knights word as he kneeled on his king and offered the edge of his swords, bare against the world, bright steel and fierce glare as his lips mouth his promise, the words he would live and die on, where war would start and where it would end - be it by his blood or his foes. And similar to that y/n is ready to be let down on where she sat, to spill her heart like a leaking wound and let it stains them both, let him know how she feels, how serious, how much time she had spent pinning after him, yearning, adoring him so silently like a lovesick suitor from afar.

Ted grinned at her, dimple deep on his cheeks and that damn fallen hair on his forehead that makes him so so lovely. He opened his mouth and y/n waited with bathed breath and wonder what words would come out but before he could even roll his tounge the door of her office opened with a harsh loud push.

"Y/n we have to- oh. oh Ted! Good morning!" Higgings strolled in clumsily and no matter how much she love the little dork she kinda want to crush his glasses on her palm and send him home.

"Higgins! Nice to see ya today, buddy" Ted stood up to greet him and to give him a pleasant hug and if the coach is annoyed at anyway, he didn't show it. God he's so kind its annoying..

"You too, Ted. You too" Higgins replied with a smile that reserved only for Ted, filled with gratitude and adoration before he turned to her and she watch, with great amusement and a little irritation, when that smile fell down on his lips. "And uh, we need to talk"

She sighed mournfully, waving a goodbye to the wonderful conversation she was having with her love and to the words he would say earlier. She gestured Higgings to sit across her before she met Ted's eyes.

"Im afraid we'll have to cut our cheesy conversation here, Ted. Duty calls and if you want someone to blame, blame Higgings" she pointed at the man with a teasing smirk that had Higgins poor heart rapidly beating with nervousness.

"What? But I'm merely doing my job-"

"Im fucking with you" she patted his shoulder with a light laugh before glancing at Ted, who still remained at her office with a smile.

"I'll gave you a call later" Ted had said "let's have a dinner, ill cook for ya'"

She bit her lip to keep the ridiculous love sick smile threatening to rip her mouth apart and nodded "ill look forward to it, have a good day"

"You too, sugar"

And he was gone and if Higgins wasn't infront of her, staring at her with that bewildered look only spooked squirrel could do she would have stood up and do a cartwheel on her carpeted floor because holy fucking shit Ted is going to cook for her, just for her, not like those times where they eat together on the locker room and she has to sneakily steal his lunch - tho she knows Ted wouldn't mind Beard is another problem, she still thinks Beard has a few dead bodies on his back, the man has a stare of a despondent convicted murderer inside a prison cell. Its crazy.

"Oh." Higgings blink rapidly, his mouth subtly and slowly forming a smile. "You and Ted?"

She squinted her eyes "We're friends"

"Not with that look in your eyes, no"

"What did you eat today to have you acting this cheeky, my dear Higgins?" She looked at him up and down with a scowl.

The man let out a grin

"I should be the one asking that" he then leaned in "or should it be 'who did you meet today that have you acting this lovesick, my dear y/n?"

She flush red "You're fired"

"That'd be the 205 times you've fire me and I will continue to ignore it as long as I live"

"The first time i did that you sobbed on my shoulder"

"Well its.." he looked away "it was a different time"

"Sure it was"

____________________________________

"Look what we have 'ere-"

"JESUS, ROY!" She had jumped 2 feet from where she stood, clutching her heart and her car keys.

"What the hell man!"

"What? You got yourself an American man and suddenly you're weak of heart?"

"That doesn't even make any sense.." she mumbled with a disturbed look as she stared at him. "What are you even doing here? and I dont have an American man, get your head straight"

"Its a fucking parking lot, im allowed to be here" He commented with a glared as he not so softly leaned on her car.

She sighed through her nose, annoyed. "What i meant was, why the fuck are you even standing about in here and suddenly appearing from the darkness like a...hairy angry batman"

"Im not fucking hairy!"

"you shed like a golden retriever, you're not fooling anybody!"

Roy, the dog, growled in annoyance before he blocked her way to the driver seat.

"Please move or ill yell bloody murder" she stated suddenly so so exhausted.

"Why actin' so rush? Got somewhere to be?" She squinted his eyes at him, suspicious and contemplating why is he being such a dick.

"Why are you talking to me like you're about to take my lunch money?"

Roy, with the little patience he has, growled once again before he shook his head, as if he was the one getting annoyed and tired on the conversation. Then he stared at her, right on the eye, as if wanting to burn her soul and cook her alive.

"Youre really not going to tell me?" He had asked, hands on his hips.

"Is that how it is?"

"What?" She ask, confused.

"You and Ted" Her eyes widen, what is he on about?

"Me and Ted? What about us?"

"Higgin-" he cleared his throat "I mean, someone told me you and the little prick was getting all chummy in your office. Even got yourself a fucking date, how lovely"

She sighed "there wasn't a date Roy, Ted and I are friends. And we aren't getting 'chummy' or whatever kind of meaning that word has in your vocabulary and tell Higgins-"

"It wasn't higgings"

"-tell him to keep his damn nose out of my business or ill key his car"

Roy stared at her for a long second before he clenched his jaw and mumbled a 'fuckkkkk'

"We're-" he swallowed before he looked upwards to the sky, as if begging the gods above to give him more strength. "We're-..f-friends, arent we?" Her eyes soften in both adoration and amusement as he grimaced with every letter he spoke.

She chuckled "we are, no matter how much you disdain that word"

"Then," Roy had sighed "believe me when I say that that cowboy Mr. Rogers is fucking inlove with you"

Suddenly the air felt too thick and her clothes felt too hot. "Roy, i think you're wrong. Ted wanst-"

"Don't you fucking dare tell me he wasn't because a blind bloke could see it in a mile away, he wouldn't fucking shut up about you. fuck sake, He even draws you!" He yelled dramatically, hands shooting in a air in a form of exaggerated irritation that only Roy Kent could do. "Those past few days where you lock yourself up in your bloody office has been the worst days of my entire life, Ted looks constipated half of the fucking time and all he does is broods and broods and fucking complains about you. He's insufferable! Beard has to talk to him in the bathroom to get him straight!" He massage his temple before sighing and looking at her so gently then, so softly, like a brother would, like a friend would do, like someone you can hold onto when life gets though and days gets bad.

"Believe me, he's inlove with you.." he softly said like a whisper.

"In every possible way a human could love, he's inlove with you"

Her breath hitched from her throat, tounge heavy on her mouth and her heart beat could be hear from miles away. The beast inside of her guts fell silent, almost asleep, like his words strike straight to his heart and send him down on the ground, wounded and shaken and could never get back up.

"I came here to.." Roy cut short, finding the proper words. "To tell you how happy I am that he finally work the balls to ask you out, but turns out he's still a fuckin' pussy and a mess of a man"

She chuckled and shook her head.

"Ted is.." She lick her lips and leaned on her car, Roy beside her and shoulder apart.

"I don't think Ted would do the first move, he's..afraid, I think. All his life Michelle was the only woman he knew, only woman he loved and if what you're saying is not true, then she's the only woman he would forever love" she said almost mournfully. "Divorced is hard, specially for someone like Ted who loves too much and give too much, maybe that's the reason why I'm hopeless inlove with him to the point of humiliation but who fucking  cares, right?" She shrugged.

She then swallowed before sighing a shaky breath. "I'll uh, ill confessed tonight. While we eat dinner, ill..ill try, and if- y'know, he doesnt like it then I'll back off" she bit her lip as her gaze burn holes to the pavement.

"I'll love him from afar, cheer for him from the stands and sob on my office if I saw him and sassy together again"

Roy chuckled "i remembered that one" reminiscing her worst times of sobbing half dead on her office table mumbling how cruel it is to love Ted and asking what Sassy has that she does not.

"Maybe ill hire a hit man too, have them kill you so you could forget about it" she bumped his shoulder with her own and lightly laugh when Roy grunts.

"I'll write it with my fucking blood, believe that"

"Write it with your chest hair and ill believe it"

"You fucking cunt-"

____________________________________

"Sorry 'bout the mess.." Ted gestured to the perfectly clean living room with a sheepish look. "didn't have time to clean up. I'm just too excited to cook for ya I forgot about everything else"

"That so? Well I'm excited to taste it, I'm sure it'll be wonderful" she smiled at him as she put the bottle of wine down on the marble kitchen bar.

"Oh it'll blow your socks off, its nothin' like the food at Sam's restaurant but its darn good if I say so myself" She watched silently as Ted, adorable adorable Ted, wore his pastel pink apron, tied it around his waist and fluff it with a lovely smile that almost had her clutching her precious weak heart.

"Im sure it'll be delicious" she say, referring more to the cook rather than food. "I like anything you do anyway, so"

Ted glance at her and smile, all dimple and bright eyes. It made her smile too, softly, subtly, like one of those yearning smile that hides thousands of words and promises and hopes and desperation.

Ted went back to his cooking, whistling a tune she swore she heard before. He was telling a story, one about a fish and a basketball and a prom that gone wrong but for the life of her she could not listen.

She thought about her conversation with Roy, the words he had utter that made her want to pour her heart out and confessed to her love. She dont want to be hopeful, being hopeful is nothing but a wish on the wind in this place. It is the poison that rots your mind, that decays the flower and the trees and the grass, break the ground you stood up upon - watch it crumble and crumble until your legs become weak and your bones break from your flesh and you fell ill and sick and cough blood until you die and wish that you should have done better, that you should have stayed quiet and at peace and settle from staring from afar instead of watching your own skin slowly peel away as you continue to hope and hope and hope and watch as the filthy earth swallow you whole and- Jesus christ she should really stop reading those sad terrifying books Nate had been recommending her alot, its ruining her head in the worst ways.

"Ya feel alright?" Ted's voice woke her from her thoughts.

She looked at him furrowed brows and concerned eyes. "Im good, it's nothing"

"We could just watch a movie, you know? Order some good ol' pizza and have a laugh on some bad movies and oh! You know what? we could just watch your favourite-"

"I rather just taste your food, Ted. If you don't mind"

"But you look tired" and there it is again, the puppy look, the vain of her existence. God he's so terrible she kinda want to kiss his face and pinch his cheeks.

She chuckled "arent you sweet"

"Oh gosh! I didnt- darn, I didnt mean it that way, sugar!" He was panicking, going all over the kitchen with his cute apron on and little sauce smudge on his cheeks.

"You l-look tired but y'know still pretty, and cute and-and you know? Please darlin' I didnt mean to offend you i just want to-"

"Hey, hey, hey.." she called out to him with a barely contained humour smile "I get it, I was fucking with you. I'm just joking, calm down"

He slumped dramatically on the counter with a sigh "oh goodness, you had me there. Thought I was gonna loose ya'"

They had talked a little bit, or maybe too much, she couldn't exactly remember how long it was or what it was about but she had know they had laugh and jest and share a few stories of their childhood and back when they're still a foolish teenager who didn't know what they want and where they belong - she  still don't know now if she was being honest, she wasn't really the kind of person that plans ahead of time, or give a genuine thought on what she wanted to do in the future and how she will get there but Ted is, Ted knows, Ted understand what he wants and how he will get there and what he see himself on the future and in which place and who he was with, it made her fall a little more inlove with him.

"How was it?" He had asked as he leaned in, nervous and fidgeting.

"Oh gosh please say somethin' I'm about to blow a nerve over 'ere"

She laugh "it was good!" And it is, the best curry she probably had.

"Its perfect, Ted. Even the spiciness is perfect"

He blew out an air "oh thank god, I was so worried ya wouldn't like it! And to be completely honest with ya' I thought I switched up the salt and sugar halfway"

She laugh again, it wasn't even funny, she's just inlove and a complete fool.

Ted started to talk about his day, down to what he had ate for breakfast and how terrible his coffee was 'it tasted like cow piss' his words. He then talked about his theory that Nate is secretly a goverment spy forced to work with him for a very dangerous top secret world breaking undercover mission - when she asked why he think that - 'because nate is a genius and there ain't no way he was a water boy before I came here and coach beard told me he saw nate yesterday slap a fly in a speed of light and didn't even flinch'

It was ridiculous theory but she then remember the amount of gory psychological thriller books Nate has been recommending her for the past few days and a good amount of them involves a spy or two. She wasn't convinced but she'll keep an eye out just incase.

"-it wasn't that much of a big deal"

"You set your school on fire!" Ted had exclaimed rather dramatically, on her opinion, as she told him her high-school tales.

"Thats like- Thats arson!"

"Its not arson if they don't know someone set it on fire" she tap her forehead lightly as if gesturing Ted to see how smart she is. And Ted, bless his heart, actually nodded.

"Youre right, thats smart. Look at ya' getting away with crimes in such a young age!" He grins so beautiful she was actually proud of what her foolish younger self did back then.

"You sounds awfully proud of me bring a criminal"

"Well its kinda awesome and speaking of awesome!--" his eyes was bright and there's a little smudge of sauce near his lips, he looks adorable and loveable and she just suddenly want to kiss him stupid and tell him how much she loves him-

"--Sassy and I are going on date this weekend!"

A glass shattered on the background.

She wasn't adventurous or a sucker for pain and near death experince but if someone had ask her what it would feel like when an arm go through her chest and crush her heart in one fist, she would describe what she's feeling right now in exact gruesome detail that even Nate would vomit on the corner.

She couldn't stop her smile for falling from her lips or the soft disbelief of 'oh' that escape from her tounge, its amazing how a simple two letter words sounded so broken out of the millions she had uttered before.

"Thats great, Ted" she thank every God there is that her voice didn't came out robotic "im happy, you deserve someone who can take care of you"

Ted nodded his head with a grin that is far too wide for his cheeks and then he stared talking, he was saying something but she couldn't hear it, didn't bothered to hear it, she was too busy wondering if the feeling of absence on her chest had been there long before or had just recently appeared now.

"-aint it funny?"

"Yeah" was her response even if she didn't hear any word of it, she avoid his gaze as she wiped her mouth with a tissue and cleared her throat - there's a vile stuck on it that she couldn't seems to swallow.

"Ted, I-uh, I think I'm gonna go home. I'm not feeling very well" she was a liar and a coward but she rather die than cry infront of him -  and suddenly she was young again, alone in her room, toes cold from the floor board and clenching her hands into a tight fist and wondering what is it about her that is unlovable.

"Oh, uh, okay" Ted stood up from the table "are you feelin' dizzy? Does your tummy feels funny? Do you wan-"

"I don't" she said firmly, she was upset, mad, not to him but to herself, for even hoping that she could have this. "I don't need anything, thank you" she lied and swallowed the humiliation of even wanting to say everything she wanted to say to him. All those words she wanted to confessed makes her sick to her stomach because how fucking dare she believe she even has a chance? How foolish to even assume she could have Ted?

"Nothing like a good rest would fix" she had stated, hoping to ease his mind but her chuckle came out weak and sad.

"Okay uh, ill walk you to your apartment - I mean, flat, christ-"

"Its okay" she grab her bag "I can walk by myself"

"I don't think its safe-"

"I can handle myself"

"Still, you look a little pale and I can't have a gal like yo-"

"Fucking hell Ted!" She had yelled and the guilt settled on her stomach as soon as she did so.

Ted look at her like she wasn't her, like another person came on his flat with a face of a friend he adores and she wanted to laugh because how could she want to love him and care for him when she could barely be half of a kind person that he was?

"Just- fuck, I got it. I can handle myself just dont-" she sighed through her nose and looked down, she could feel the tears on her eyes and but none of them fell down.

"Just let me be, yeah? I'm not a fucking toddler you need to be coddle all the time"

There's a pause before Ted nods "Okay" his eyes were sad, sadder than anything she had ever saw and it would've break her heart if it weren't shattered before.

She looked at him silently, a second. She almost wanted to say it, say the words, just lay it all on the table and let Ted feast on the remnants of her broken heart and whatever is left. He'll take good care of it, she knows. That's a kind of man he is. Maybe even fix it together with some melted gold.

"Im sorry" Ted was the one who apologized even if she should be the first, it made her guts coil. "I didnt mean to upset you, I was just-just worried. I'm sorry"

She looked down and clenched her fist, dig her nails on her palm.

"You have nothing to be sorry for, I was being a dick and I have no excuse-"

"Youre tired and you're not feeling well, 's okay"

"Its not, Ted" she shook her head "I shouldn't have talk to you like that, you're my-" she swallowed "youre my friend, I shouldn't have done that. I'm sorry"

Ted smile, sad and worried all at once. "Its okay, I forgive ya'"

He shouldn't be, atleast not this easily.

"Okay" she nod her head once before she turn to the door with trembling hands.

Ted appeared next to her and held the door open for her. "Be safe, sweetheart"

'Don't' she wanted to whisper but felt too tired to do so.

"Call me when you get home"

"Will do"

The ground was wet as she walked and the road felt much sadder than before, the cold night air beg her for warmth and instead of the heat of her flat her mind travel to the warmth of his hands, of his touch. Y/n briefly wonder how she came to be like this, how she love so fiercely like a beaten dog and dig claw marks on everything she ever love just to watch it be yank away from her as easily as her tears could fall.

[bisexualdawnsummers]

I saw somewhere that one of the reasons why people hated Michael is because he's too whiny and rude towards Justin. But imagine being in his shoes, tho. As someone who has a best friend I'm willing to ride or die for, I also think anyone will never be good for my best friend and I'm always suspicious towards anybody lol. Because I knew how hard they've worked, how much they suffered and how long of a journey it was for them to get this level of somewhat peace in their life. If anyone is ever trying to give them more stress in any way, I'm suddenly so pissed lol. For people who doesnt get it, Michael could definetely could come across as "posessive" & "overthinking" (the whole narrative of "He wanna fuck Brian so bad its pathetic" doesnt help either, which makes me roll eyes so bad because from time to time, it's mostly Brian that inniciate their physical contacts first so) but you can't help but always looking out for this particular one person that makes your life worth living, when you know they can be reckless like Brian especially. Especially with how escalated Justin's family life situation is after he met Brian. Through Michael's lense, Justin is a stranger with baggages that he doesn't want Brian to carry since he knew and understand Brian already has a lot in his plate. Guaranteed, I can't all justify every thing that Michael said and did in regards to Justin and I'm ok with that (part of liking Michael is to accept that he just makes human mistakes as a grumpy 30 years old gay Italian man lol), but the hatred that he receive literally degrade his existence into just "Another pathetic best friend that's in love with the main character" is just sad to see.

Yeah, I've always thought the idea of Michael being a big old meanie to poor little Justin as a bit overblown. Could Michael be snippy with him? Sure. And he occasionally went too far with some of his words, but his tendency to speak before thinking is one of his character flaws, and should hardly detract from his better qualities.

What a lot of people like to overlook/ignore is the fact that Michael was actually one of the first characters that tried to look out for Justin in a way. I think it's like ep. 2 where Justin comes looking for Brian again and when Brian ducks out on him, Ted and Emmett say that Justin is Brian's problem not theirs. Michael is the only one to act like a responsible adult and not let this teenage kid wander around on his own. He takes him to the diner and makes sure he has a ride home. Of course, it doesn't end very well when Michael tries to warn Justin off Brian. Justin is bratty to Michael in that moment. And Michael does come off jealous and a bit whiny, but I think in some way he was trying to look out for Justin. I don't think he was entirely selfishly motivated. He's probably witnessed Brian break countless hearts over the years, and was trying to save Justin a bit of grief by telling him the truth. He wasn't lying when he told Justin he wasn't Brian's boyfriend. Brian doesn't do boyfriends, he barely does repeats.

Also, I can see how Michael, or anyone in his situation would be annoyed by Justin's sudden and inescapable presence. Imagine being someone close to 30, and one of your friends sleeps with a teenager, and then that teenager shows up at your mother's house. The kid is not only stalking your friend but everyone in his life in hopes of getting closer to him. Anyone would feel a bit overprotective, and a lot frustrated.

And yeah, a lot of people like to downplay Michael's importance in Brian's life, reducing him to the guy with the hopelessly unrequited crush on his friend. But their relationship is so much deeper and more important than that (whether romantic or platonic). imo, if someone doesn't understand Michael's place in Brian's heart, then they just don't understand Brian.

[winderlylandchime]

1/2 We are officially at 5x06. The beginning of the end and heartbreak. Just so you know: he somehow convinced himself that he was just reading too much into Justin’s behavior previous episodes and that he misunderstood Randy’s performance and that all will be okay. Don’t ask how he got to that conclusion bc he doesn’t know either. I would also like to say that i wrote this out on Friday but ended up not being able to send it cause somebody was grieving cause it was the anniversary of Freddie Mercury. So he forced me and the neighbor to go to a bar where he bribed the bartender to put Queen on. And then he pouted at the bar, listening to Queen, talking about Britin to the bartender (!!) and drank his juice. Like a child. Anyway: we came to meet Brandon ‘whats with the zoom in on Brian and Justin? What is happening? HE TURNED BRIAN DOWN? Bri Bri, i would never treat you like that!’ And immediately after that it shows the wedding Rage cover ‘what the fuck is happening? Why are they doing that? That makes no sense, i don’t like it. (mikey and ben start kissing) WHATS WITH THE ZOOM IN ON JUSTIN AGAIN?’ ‘WHATS WRONG WITH DEBBIE? What is happening?!’ And we made it to the Queer Guy meet and greet ‘what the fuck is this? *looks at me* whats going on in this episode? LOOK BRIAN SHOWED UP! (Brian has his queer guy speech) i hate to say it but i think Brian is right. I mean even that dude at the news said that even homophobes love him..why did Brian just have a flashback to that blonde dude rejecting him? Again whats going on this episode?!’ Hunter says theres no solution to him being treated bad by his classmates ‘burn the school down to the ground. Problem solved. I’m surprised Ben doesn’t understand Hunter..like dude Deb treated you like shit for half a season?’ And we are at Britin scene ‘AHHHHH MY BOYS! (Brian says he’s gonna burn mikeys house down) GREAT MINDS THINK ALIKE! (Justin asks Brian whats his problem and my brother pauses the ep) i could ask the same thing! Because why are they zooming in on you all the time? Whats going on my Blondie? (And Brandon is back on screen) whats up with Baywatch wannabe? Brian is actually talking about his problems to Justin? SEE GROWTH! Why is he so passive aggressive to him?’ ‘Emy, Brian was telling you the truth. Oh shit, what is he gonna do? Fuck someone on live tv? *forgets about the cast and goes to make a fist* FUCK. I cant have anything this season’ and we’re at the scene where Brandon is there during Brian’s meeting ‘okay who the fuck is he and why is he everywhere? How rude up to tell Bri he doesn’t have fears about aging meanwhile he’s ready to jump out a window over it. Why does Brian even care about Baywatch? I feel like even though it would bother him, he’d act like he doesnt give a fuck. WHAT IS GOING ON!!!!’ Em is talking about underwear on tv ‘oh god, oh god. I wish this was real news but holy fucking shit. I need Emmett back at party planning. SEE EM, BRIAN WAS RIGHT! Everyone is always rude to him but he’s the only one who tells the truth’ and Britin is at the house warming party *he sees Monty/Ely* ‘ughh i forgot they existed. I dont get how they can be friends with them? Is it cause of the whole birds of the feather thing? Aka boring and annoying attracts? (Mikey introduces JR and it shows Hunter) WHAT ABOUT HUNTER?! I swear they forgot about him. (Brian and Em/Ted bump into each other) Why is Emmett angry? We all know he was telling the truth….a bit rudely but fuck it. Why is Emy lying? *looks at me shocked* is it possible that Lindsays hair got worse? (Ben pulls out the Rage comics) oh no, i still hate this. (Monty/eli speak up)WHY ARE THESE TWO DUDES SO OBSESSED WITH EVERYONE BEING MARRIED WITH KIDS?! Oh i just know Blondie was hiding this from Bri. Id be annoyed too. WHATS WITH THE ZOOM IN ON BLONDIE?’

he somehow convinced himself that he was just reading too much into Justin’s behavior previous episodes and that he misunderstood Randy’s performance and that all will be okay - oh noooooo Brother Anon, you are not wrong but tens of us wish you were.

I love that your brother was mourning Freddie and made the bartender put on Queen and listen to him talk about QAF. Are we surrrreeee your brother isn't a little queer?

Oh my god, he's Debbie. If Debbie were a man.

HE TURNED BRIAN DOWN? Bri Bri, i would never treat you like that! <- UM exactly

His horror at the Rage wedding issue is appropriate and correct. WHYYYYY.

I love how much he hates Monty/Eli

And how much he appreciates that Brian tells Emmett the truth. Look, would you rather have people who blindly support you in your life or would you rather have a Brian?

And yes, the entire "OUR CHILD JR" and completely neglecting Hunter smh.

[namearentfunfr]

i disagree with this ted view actually. he never had an arc in tgwdlm. he started off screwing around with another man's wife, he continued to screw around with another man's wife, he ditched the wife when she wouldnt fuck him anymore to hit on some else, he gets rescued out of a situation and had 2 seconds of maybe changing his way before abandoning his saviours to save his own ass

there wasnt an arc. there was never going to be an arc. if he was truly willing to change, he wouldnt have abandoned paul and emma. what he felt when he proclaimed hed change his way was gratefulness, something everyone has. just because he said hed change (which he never delivered upon because he never cared for anyone but him) doesnt mean hes suddenly a good person

i really dislike ted as a person. i think the fandom gives him way too much credit when hes never shown himself as anything other than an asshole. throughout tgwdlm, his relationship with charlotte hinged on whether shed fuck him or not. any time she wouldnt fuck him, he either told her to get out or got out himself.

i think even if he loved charlotte (which he doesnt. hes said shes only ever truly loved jenny), he repressed it to the point it didnt matter anymore. we only ever see them as horny coworkers, and afaik ted never displayed an ounce of care for charlotte that was foreplay eventually leading to sex

the only reason ted is a fan favorite is because we got a tragic backstory for him. we see his brother who is genuinely a nice kid. im willing to argue that sam and ted are equally bad as human beings, but because ted is more humanized through his family and his past, he gets sympathized

also sam is a cop so thats an automatic acab

tldr: i hate ted. i dont think he cares for charlotte or is anywhere near the heart of gold guy people paint him out to be. sam sucks and so does ted, you cant pretend ted doesnt suck (personality wise) as much as sam

hot take: the only reason the starkid fandom dislikes sam and not ted is because ted had more time on-stage to develop and show his quirks and redeemable qualities: (the presbyterian line, actually *caring* about charlotte, actually being somewhat rational while drunk… etc.)

meanwhile, all we get from sam is his interest in musical theatre, because the rest of his plotline is solely centered around his relationship with charlotte and how dysfunctional they are as a couple; there’s no interaction with any of the other characters to allow the depth that he has the potential for

like, for all we know, charlotte was the one that started cheating on sam first. we know that she has several men in rotation (thank you nick lang’s twitter), and it seems to stem from a lack of physical affection from sam right? sam, however, seems to go out of his way to actually *do* things with zoey, like going to see mamma mia. the cheating isn’t just physical, it’s emotional too, which makes me think that maybe sam and charlotte were highschool sweethearts or something that just *really* fell off the bandwagon of functionality

this has been my tedtalk

[snufkins-left-boot]

lets talk the lion king 2, everybody.  so. for those of you who haven’t seen it, first of all, this will probably contain spoilers.  second of all, go watch it. third, this is nuka.

and this is kovu. his little brother.

and this is their sister, vitani. (younger than nuka, i THINK older than kovu but i’m not sure they might be twins)

all three of these characters are VERY important to this post.

so, Kovu, the neurotypical coded sibling, was chosen by Scar to become king after him, even though Kovu wasn’t Scar’s son. whereas, Nuka is constantly theorized to be scar’s ACTUAL son.  and honestly, it would make sense.  like look at scar, then look at nuka. these two are OBVIOUSLY very closely related.  but that’s not the point of this post.

the point of this post is how Zira, their biological mother, treated them as individuals.

before you start talking to me about how “oh but shes the villain” or “she’s a lion” i dont actually care.  she may have been the villain, but these were her OFFSPRING. and lions or not, they’re sapient.  like they have morals.

ok so lets go.  lets talk about them youngest to oldest, because i want to save Nuka for last so i can REALLY go off.

Kovu first.  Zira WORSHIPPED Kovu. or at least, that’s how it appears at first glance.  but if you’ll take the time to look a little closer, she really only worshipped the fact that he was chosen to be king.

as SOON as he “betrayed” Zira, she didn’t care anymore. she was literally ready to kill him.  like huh???  

i may add more on that later, but now let’s move on to one of my very first gay awakenings Vitani. Zira saw vitani as a soldier. nothing more, nothing less.  like, when Kovu gets the chance to kill Simba and doesnt, and Vitani sees it, she immediately reports back to her mother.  her mother freaks out at this report. doesn’t even thank vitani for literally SPYING on her own brother.  like what???  Vitani has always struck me as not neurotyical, but not SUPER neurodivergent either. this will be important at the end of the story, kids, so remember this.

ok now i’m gonna GO OFF about nuka.  i have ALWAYS related to nuka. and i only JUST recently realized why.  it’s because he’s neurodivergent, and his mother treats him like shit.  and. that’s exactly how my life went. so this boy. he SHOWERED his mother in as many gifts as he could access, he did EVERYTHING he could to please this bitch, and how did she repay him??? by abusing him.  all nuka wanted was for his mother to give him even an OUNCE of the love that she gave to kovu. but she never did!  my guess is because he’s neurodivergent.  and, zira REALLY strikes me as a conservative

to conservatives, having a neurodivergent child is basically the worst thing that could possible happen to you. not the worst thing that could happen to your child, but to YOU.  i mean, the way conservatives treat autistic people, even their own offspring, is APALLING.  if you’re conservative, and your child comes out autistic, you’re gonna treat them like they’ll never be good enough. or like they’ll never be able to understand ANYTHING.  thats just one example though. 

i’m not autistic, but I am ADHD, and bipolar.  I hyperfixate on things CONSTANTLY.  a GOOD parent would at least PRETEND to be interested when i’m rambling about my current hyperfixation.  but conservatives don’t usually make good parents to nd kids.  and sadly, my parents were VERY conservative, so any time i tried to tell my mother about something that i was interested in and she wasnt, she’ dlet me know she didn’t care.  whether she did it passve aggressively, or just, straight up said “I don’t really care” (which was what usually happened. the “i dont really care” option.).

i guarantee you that nuka tried to tell his mother things he thought were cool. all the time. he found a pretty bug? ooooo i gotta show mother! saw a really twisty tree? OOOO mother will want to hear about that!!! and i also guarantee that his mother blew him off every time he tried to show her something cool or something he found interesting.  like.  im finna write angsty nuka fanfiction i’m so mad. like UGGGGH

oh and do you know when Zira realized how much she meant to him? (if she ever realized it. i’m not sure she wasn’t pretending to be completely honest)....  it was when he literally DIED trying to impress her! like he’s dying under a log and she’s only JUST NOW realizing “oh my gods this is my son and i’ve treated him like SHIT his ENTIRE life!!!”

like uggggh i hate zira so much. like, i love a lot of villains, but not this bitch who literally makes me think of how shitty my own mother was to me.

ok thats all. i just needed to make a very angry tumblr post™.  that’s all.  thanks for coming to my fucking TED talk everybody.

[gh0stwriting]

Hello, I was wondering if you could do hc’s with Brahms, Bo, and Michael having a tall, plus sized s/o? And like said s/o not being use to actually being smaller than others and just constantly in a “wtf wtf wtf” state when anything affection or intimate wise happens? Please and thank you

(i hate Bo with a fucking passion but i understand how much these kinds of requests mean to people so i gotchu :) also i thought his accent was a lot thicker than it is and now im disappointed, my version of Bo is full southern bc i like it)

BRAHMS HEELSHIRE 🧸

you were always the tallest person in your friend groups as a kid, hitting 6 feet tall in your late years of high school, and on top of that youve never been the slimmest of people so people have always had easy picks when it comes to teasing.

though when you volunteered to babysit for the Heelshires and eventually met the real Brahms you could finally say youve met someone thats actually taller than you. now before you even started dating youve had a romantic relationship per se, with him being very affectionate and also demanding goodnight kisses.

though, without fail, every time he hugs or kisses you your brain spirals into a kind of panic bc he actually loves you for you. it sends you over the moon but at the same time into the darkest pits of your mind and its almost unbearable but at the same time so amazing.

be prepared for boatloads of affection at every moment of every day bc hes just so full of love for you and needs you to know the extent of his feelings constantly

MICHAEL MYERS 🔪

king of not caring what you look like. its not just the stereotypical “its whats on the inside” either, he just doesnt concern himself with your appearance, if youre happy and healthy then thats amazing.

i mean, he can pin a man to the wall using one hand and a knife, you probably weigh nothing to him and he can and will pick you up whenever he wants. also he’ll kiss your cheek or something and just watch you blush and freak out bc he thinks its cute.

Honestly he kind of prefers your build bc it seems less fragile so he doesnt have to worry as much about hurting you, though he always will. also hi he’ll literally never say it bc he never says anything but no matter what you wear he thinks you look adorable and if you think the outfit makes your body look weird he’ll kinda just tilt his head and stare for a second. hes never heard such a big lie in all his years.

(fuck im running out of ideas)

just fyi if you ever tell michael youre too heavy for something, like him carrying you or various other things he’ll do it just to prove you wrong

also he can and has and will continue to make you feel like a non gender specfic deity bc thats what you are to him, if you can love him despite his track record he’ll love you twice as much from the get go

BO SINCLAIR 🚬

(hes cute but in a rat kinda way)

he simps so hard for you, when you first showed up in Ambrose his first thought was ‘damn they’re cute, what a shame’ though obviously he didnt end up killing you, even after you found out the secret of the village.

one of his favorite things to do is act like hes got somewhere to be and just walk by and grab your ass and if you ask him why he does it he says something corny like “‘m just appreciatin the art darlin’” which never fails to make you blush and get a lil nervous. though Bo pulls out more of the charm and usually says “aw cmon sweet pea, i was just teasin’ ya, ya are hot though.”

literally any time he pulls out the Sinclair Charm™️ you die a little inside, hes so sweet to you regardless of how you look. and cranks the Charm™️ up to 11 if youre having a bad day, he jjst wants you to smile, he swears its the most beautiful thing hes ever seen.

one of his favorite things is to just cuddle you for hours and as far as hes concerned it solves about as many problems as his sweet talking does. youre sad? cuddles. youre insecure about yourself? cuddles, and youre the little spoon. youre embarrassed about the amount of affection he gives you? cuddles, but make them extra mushy.

(ideas have left the chat)

also he totally thinks youre perfect and incredibly adorable regardless of your height, taller or shorter than him, and regardless of your weight. (ps. if you fall asleep cuddling his hands are totally on your ass and he denies he does it but also refuses to stop bc you blush every time you tell him to and he thinks its precious. thank you for coming to my ted talk.)

[fandomsyoulove]

All the events that lead to Sirius running away from his family.

Sirius Black x reader, Sirius Black x Potter reader, Regulus Black x reader.

Summary: A ball in Grimauld Place doesnt end as expected either for Sirius Black or Lena Potter, James´s sister.

Author´s note: Okay, this is a part of a story Ive been writting lately. I never post what I write, but I just felt like sharing it. If someone wants it I can upload more parts. Thank you xx. PD: Enlgish is not my first language so sorry for any mistakes.

Words: 3200. 

Lena breathed deeply standing in the mirror. Regulus had invited her to their family yearly ball and she was mortified. She was so done with that family, they were ruinous, bad people. Her mind drifted to the two brothers. Regulus would be glad she was going, and she also felt that Sirius would appreciate it. After their rendevouz in the Room of Requirements their friendship was as strong as ever. She would spend more time with the Marauders since then, distancing herself from her Slytherin boys, to the Gryffindors joy. She knew how bad the two boys had it and wished time and time again that she had any power over them and she could just bring them home, away from those irresponsible parents.

It was not only Walburga and Orion that she had to worry about, it was also Bellatrix, and Narcisa's boyfriend, Lucius. Pureblood supremacy talk was the usual take in these events and she really dreaded to go. How in their right mind would want to spend hours in the same room as all of those racist supremacists? It was tiresome, to say the least. Still, as always, she couldn't help to want their approval. So she had bought a green dress with some straps on the back. It was silky, and she hoped to blend in. Obviously, she had Reg in mind. She wanted to make an impression on him. They had been together for the whole year and she felt the need to constantly live up to his standards. Of course he had the same pressure, they both shared it, that's why the two had to be perfect.

Ever since the room of requirements incident, in which Lena and Sirius had almost kissed each other, on multiple occasions, she had tried not to think about his words. That confession she was not supposed to have heard. Well if it had been for Sirius, he would have woken her up and told her. But she knew he had his brother to think of. And so did she. Thats why she concentrated hard in being his friend now more than ever. She figured that if she was to keep on with these confusing feelings, she would have to maintain their friendship, not talking would just make her want to see him even more.

All of these thoughts clouded her mind as she was putting on her make up. Her lips a bright red, his eye shadow dark. Just in that instant, his brother made an appearance.

- My, my, sis you look stuning.- he complimented her as he turned her and the dress lightly swayed.

- Thanks, James.- she smiled and soon James turned serious.

- I need to ask you something. - he pleaded, the girl just nodded asking him to continue. - Can you please have an eye on Padfoot?- he asked preocupied for his friend.

- I will, dont you worry. He is my friend as well.- she responded taking his hand.

- I know, I know. Its just, I wish I could be there with him. He never talks about it, just curses his mother over and over again. - the girl nodded.

- I know, dont worry about that. You are a good friend. - she was quick to reply.

- I try.- he smiled once again, hugging his sister before they made their way out to where their parents were hanging out.

- You look absolutely gorgeous.- Euphemia Potter took her in.

- Thank Merlin Regulus is a chivalrous kid.- Fleamont raised his brows.- You really are stunning, Lena. - he complimented. She smiled once again, lightly caressing her curly short hair so it would fall into place.

- I better get going.- she finally spoke making her way to the fireplace.

- Grimlaud place 12.- she shouted, careful not to get ashes on her dress.

When she arrived, the room was abandoned, except for Sirius Black.

- Lena!- he greated smirking as always. He quickly hugged her, not really taking in her appeareance until they backed from the other. His hand grabbed hers.

- You look so amazing! That dress fits you in every place.- he spoke bewilded with the girl who had a large smile on her face.- I wish it were red but hey, at least it has a slit on the leg. - his eyes roamed over her, who was already red from all the blushing.

- You look great as well, Siri. I mean you usually look good, more than good. But that tunic is working miracles.- she began talking, not knowing what had come over her.

- Be careful now. One would think that you wanted some of this.- he gestured to himself. The girl laughed loudly, and suddenly, Regulus was at the door. The two quickly separated.

- Reg!- she screamed, hugging him tightly, not noticing Sirius threatening expression.

- I thought you couldn't be prettier, guess I was wrong.- he looked at her adoringly, just as Sirius had a few moments ago.

- Well I thought the same, none of us was right.- both laughed before kissing. The older brother gagged behind them before making his way to the ball on the living room.

- I missed you.- she spoke while she caressed his face. He smiled at this, finally in comfort in her hands.

- I did too, more than you know.- he replied grabbing her hands and linking them over his chest.

- Well, we shouldn't keep the others waiting should we?- she smiled, trying to cheer him up.

- We will leave them breathless, even Cissy and that Malfoy.- he replied and both laughing made their way to the ball.

The black hall was decorated with plenty of silver and green decorations. Lena stared at the room in awe, and also a little bit disgusted. It was dark, with the black walls and all, the only light coming from the gigantic lights.

The two tried to walk with confidence. Her hand on his, holding it tightly, reasuringly.

Soon everybody's atention was on them. Some compliments from Walburga, Orion being proud of the Slytherin colours, Narcissa loving the hair. All viewed by a lurking Sirius that already had a glass of wine in his hand.

- You love her, dont you?- his favourite cousin stood next to him, in a gorgeous black dress.

- I dont know what your talking about.- he tried to play it cool, drinking some more wine.

- Cmon, Sirius. It is quite obvious. You cannot keep your eyes from her. - she replied, trying to get him to confess.

- Maybe I do. But I cant do anything about it.- he said lowly, dwoning yet another cup, this time champagne.

- It is a terrible situation you find yourself in. Both options ahead of you, you can try to be the good brother, or go for the girl. - she reasoned.

- Where is Ted?- Sirius tried to change the topic but his tone was harsh.

- Shhh, keep quiet will you?- she pleaded hoping that no one had heard.

-Ah, but that is a terrible situation.- Sirius spoke bitterly. To which his cousin just replied.

- I dont care that you are heartbroken, dont mention him here. That is a very sensible topic.- she spoke, serious all of a sudden.

- Im sorry. Alcohol and anger are not a good mix.- he tried to sound remorseful. The older Black understood and just left him.

Over and over again Sirius cursed himself. He should've told her over the moments he had this past year. Why hadnt him? How could he let this happen? Lena was dancing gracefully with Regulus, both laughing at something she had said. His hateful parents stared at the couple grinning. Lena and Reg were the perfect couple and everybody knew it. How could he have allowed this to happen. It should be him, dancing with her. It should be him making her laugh. It should be him, who his parents would gaze at with pride.

But there he was, already having a few too many drinks. Making a show of himself, perpetuating the view his family had of him. It was crazy how much he despised every single one of them. He wanted to take the girl, runaway with her and never turn back.

A few hours passed and nothing seemed to change. Every once in a while his parents would scold him for drinking too much or asking him to stop sulking around. But what else could he do? When the girl he adored didnt leave his brotherss side.

Even Andromeda was dancing with the couple, seeming to be very close with the Potter. Slytherin budies, Sirius thought. He felt betrayed, miserable, this was unberable. He needed to leave, he could only hope that the night would end soon. But oh how wrong he was.

- It seems like you are having a great time.- the only moment he had taken his eyes off her, she had made her way towards him.

- Haha, youre funny. - he resorted.

- Cmon, Siri. Ive seen you all night only moving to grab more drinks. You are the life of the party.- she continued to joke.

- Well this is hell. - he added staring at her with anger.

- I know, right?- she replied laughing to which he raised his brows. - What?- she asked taking his cup and drinking from it.

- You dont seem too bad with Reggie and my lovely parents.- he said bitterly.

- How have you sneaked firewhiskey in here?- she wondered taking another big gulp from it, without ackonwledging him.

- shhh. - he tried shutting her up, but her laugh was contagious.

- Oh Cmon. - she laughed again grabbing his arm.

- Lena, Ive had way too much to drink and I see that you are served as well so maybe try to lay off the booze. - his attempt at being responsible was cut off by the girl.

- Im not that bad, you aren't either. Now, we should dance.- she reached for his hand.

The boy just stared at the gorgeous girl, this was his dream, wasn't it?

- Cmon, Reg is dancing with your mum and I really dont want to dance with your father. So please.- she pleaded with puppy eyes. Sirius felt like he couldnt move, not saying a word, his eyes fixed on her. - Sirius, are you with us?- she asked when she didnt get a response. Finally, breaking from his trance, the boy took her hand and smiled.

- Ive been waiting the whole night for you to ask me to dance.- he whispered in her ear once they linked arms at the dance floor. She just smiled, squeezing his hand tighter. He, in response, gripped her waist. She found it hard to breathe, not daring to look at him. Soon they were waltzing around the room. Neither could say a word, only the music could be heard. Their eyes fixed on the others. They moved gracefully, without paying much atention to the rest. They didnt notice the stranged look on Sirius parents, or Regs anoyed look.

- Im sorry. Ive tried to come to you a few times, but Reg wouldnt allow me to leave his side. - she finally spoke as a slower song played and they continued moving through the hall.

- Dont worry, the wait was worth it.- he replied, and another smile crept into her face. His grey eyes on her hazels. Suddenly, Sirius turned her around, and when they were back face to face, she noticed his stern look, she mimicked him, not knowing if she had done something wrong. - I dont like Regulus treating you like that. - he stated, his eyes everywhere but on her.

- He needs me, Siri. - she quickly replied as they tilted to the side. - Besides, I knew I would be able to see you after some time. - she added. - If I really had wanted to, trust me, I would have come. - Sirius frown became wider.

- I knew the wait would make this more worth a while.- she whispered in his ear, her lips barely centimeters away. He breathed in deeply, closing his eyes, smelling her perfume, she was so close to him.

The song ended abruptly and they separated to applaud, still gazing at the other.

Andromeda made her way towards them looking stunning.

- Im sorry darling. - she referred to the girl. - I havent danced with my cousin for the whole night. Would you mind?- she pleaded, looking at the younger Black that still hadnt processed what had happened.

- Of course, Drome.- she said lovingly to her friend. - Ill leave you to it.- she added smiling, her hand reaching for his arm for a few seconds.

The boy turned quickly when she walked past him, but soon, his cousin moved his head with her hands to fix his gaze on her.

- You are so in love.- she smiled, her dark eyes filled with love for him.

- I cannot help it. - he turned them around so he could stare at her once again. - She is perfect.- he added, lovestruck. His lips parted, adoration clear in his eyes.

- I dont know how this will turn out, but either way Im invested.- Andromeda joked, messing with Sirius hair, making him turn towards her annoyed, but smiling deep down.

A few more hours passed, without much trouble. Sirius had some laughs with Andromeda, Lena was able to dance with him for another long while. He supposed this was the best he could have expected for the night. Of course some of the firewhiskey he had drowned in helped too.

Everything seemed to have turned out fine in the end. That was until he heard Malfoy speak. He had tried to avoid listening to them, staying as far away as he could from them. But he was next to his cousin that was tying her shoe when he heard a name too familiar to him.

- Take Lilly Evans, she is a mud-blood, but she tries to seem smarter.- Sirius was used to them boasting about blood superiority, he could pass that, knowing that if he reacted, only Andromeda and Lena would help him.

- She is a know-it-all. But when we put them into place, theyll know what is good. All of that intelligence wont be worth much.- Bellatrix added, disgusted.

The boy balled his hands into fists, his breathing erratic. If James were here, he wouldnt allow any of this. How could he? He was no better than any of them. He was sick and tired of this. Next to him, Lena appeared grabbing his hand.

- I cant wait for the day those people dont atend Hogwarts. The school would be just as it should be, without mudbloods. Just as Salazar Slytherin would have wanted. - Lucius agreed with the Black sister. Narcissa keeping quiet.

Andromeda stood next to the couple, also trying to think what to do. Sirius parents were on the other side of the hall, with Regulus, talking with some ministry people. The boy felt the anger boiling in him, his heartbeat racing.

- Malfoy, the school wont be perfect until you are gone.- he quickly made his way towards him, the two girls following him.

- Ah, blood traitor, you are the next, after the clensing of the mudbloods. - Bellatrix hissed at him, Rodolphus joining them.

- Im so ashamed to share your last name.- Sirius resorted, going towards her, wand in hand. But Rabastan stepped in front of her and Lena grabbed his arm.

- Sirius, its not worth it.- Lena tried to reason with him, pleading him with her soft gaze and calm voice. The boy began calming his breathing before turning around.

- A blood traitor and a coward, you have it all, dear cousin. Why Orion and Walburga put up with you scapes my knowledge. - Bellatrix lunged for him, ending in Rodolphuss arms, holding her.

- Shut up you crazy bitch!- Sirius didnt have time to think about what he was doing, before grabbing his wand again.

-Sirius!- Lena shouted but he was already gone.

- You dare talk to me like that? Gryffindor.- his cousin kept trying to get him angrier.

Soon Sirius and her were face to face, wand at the other. Everyone had turned to them, including Sirius parents. Their son had his back towards them, one look from his wife and Orion knew what to do.

- Expeliermus!- Sirius ended up on the floor, his wand on the other side of the room. Bellatrix and Lucius laughed while Walburga began shouting at his son.

- What the hell?- Lena screamed, having too much of this family, quickly reaching Sirius.

- Are you okay?- she asked taking his head on her hands, supporting him on her knees.

- My head hurts.- he exclaimed, his hand reaching hers.

- Leave with me. - she pleaded, tears on her eyes. Both stayed like that while the party ended.

The people from the ministry left, and soon only the closest Black family members stayed. Regulus made his way towards the two, after being scolded by his mother on how Lena had acted.

- Lena, you have to go. - he tried grabbing her arm standing, but she yanked him away.

- You should leave. Both of you, come with me, now.- she begged time and time again, her vision now blurry.

Both Black brothers saw her in distress, not knowing what to do. While Walburga cursed his son, and Bellatrix accompanied her, Sirius took her hands and moved them from his face.

- Its okay, Lena. You dont want to be on the other end of her rage. - he said lowly. Regulus just stared, not knowing how to feel.

- I can´t leave you here.- she said between sobs.

- Ill be fine, I always am, arent I?- he tried to smile to the girl that held his heart. She nodded before helping him up.

- I love you.- she whispered in his ear as she hugged him goodbye.

- I love you too.- he responded, before she kissed his cheek.

Then, drying her tears, she made her way to Regulus that was still in shock. When she reached him, he reacted, leading her to the living room. None could speak, both feeling too many things all at once. Rage, horror, impotence, love. They didnt even share a single touch on the way.

- Bye, Regulus.- she said bluntly before turning for the chimney.

[messrmarauder]

[disclaimer: remadora au headcanon rant, i don’t actually write fanfic but i think about them literally 24 hours a day so i like to have my headcanons done well]

PLEASE LET ME KNOW WHAT YOU THINK IM GOING INSANE

i’ve obsessed over the fact remus and tonks survived the battle and their au in my mind that i regularly forget they actually died. i’m always daydreaming about them living on from the war and i always imagined they’d have one more son called alastor john lupin who’s four years younger than teddy.

i really didn’t want to give them anymore children in my mind because i don’t think they’d want more than two and i can’t imagine them with much more than that. i thought about how much remus would love a little girl but i just cant make myself give harry and remus the same amount of kids with the same gender number and order, it seems weird.

although, for years i’ve thought about them losing a baby during the pregnancy and remus going through all this guilt because he thinks it’s karma for not wanting teddy etc etc. it would have been a girl and tonks would be so devastated and feeling guilty because she knew remus wanted a girl so badly, angst angst angst. i think considering the circumstances they’d name her either just hope lupin or eleanor hope lupin. just so the initials were not HEL lol.

but the reason for the post is that i’m annoyed that ted gets a first name namesake and lyall has nothing. i love alastor too much as a first name to change it and i love the fact they could call him AJ so i don’t want to make lyall a middle name. plus that’s still not fair anyway. so what if they had a third son after ally and he was lyall. lye for short. teddy, ally, lyall/lye. but then imagine they named a child after mad-eye moody before they named one after lyall..

but then i couldn’t think of a good middle name because it’s uncomfortable to choose between james and sirius and remus wouldn’t want to take that from harry. so who else ???

i thought maybe a different friend of remus or tonks that we don’t know about (a long term friend of remus that died or tonks auror friend that died) but it’s not as strong an idea because i don’t have a lot of solid OCs for them. i would say charlie but i’m not keen on it because it doesnt go with my au at all because remus hates charlie and they’ve fought about tonks for years. like by then they’ll be civil and probably get on but not on namesaking terms, he’s not a freak like harry.

speaking of harry, i thought it would be so uncomfortable for harry to have a namesake so i thought maybe the story is that they let teddy pick and teddy picked harry so they couldn’t argue and it wasn’t some big cringey awkward moment.

i’m actually cut between making ally and lye twins because it’ll make the whole “we don’t have enough names, we’ll let teddy decide” and the “sorry we named grandchildren after mad eye moody before we named one after you” more believable.

i do have this whole thing about remus and his dad having some tension and john being the name that is always passed down as a middle name in lupin tradition so it’s not SO unbelievable if they waited until their third child to mention lyall. if lyall is the second son he could have to have the middle name john which ruins AJ again. and alastor harry lupin doesn’t have the same ring to it. and that makes lyall, lyall john lupin II. but if i just make it alastor lyall it’s not fair to lyall to be just a middle name. BUT if its lyall alastor then it ruins my headcanon of the john lupin tradition because i bet lyall would be annoyed about teddy not being john. (i have a post about teddy’s middle name in the emma mwpp tag, i’ll tag it in this post so you can find it) maybe they just didn’t name him one after lyall because he was alive and mad eye was dead and gave them the money ??

i imagine them really close in age anyway with a four year age gap from teddy and they would have lost hope/eleanor in that four years. i feel like tonks would be caught between teddy being an only child (which they both hated) and going through pregnancy again because it was really bad for her with teddy and she’d be so nervous after losing the little girl. so i think she would absolutely stop after two because she would be so stressed during ally’s pregnancy.

so either lyall is an accident so they’re really close in age or they’re twins. or what if there’s some big auror mission and there’s a baby left behind and they just adopt the baby and it’s a big scandal because remus is a werewolf and who the hell is this baby? so they get the baby not long after ally is born so they aren’t twins but really close in age and tonks doesn’t have to go through pregnancy again. but then i would probably name that auror mission baby alastor because it’s more fitting. i’m losing my mind.

so:

edward remus lupin (teddy) 1998

alastor john lupin (ally/aj) 2002

lyall harry lupin (lye) 2003

OR

edward remus lupin (teddy) 1998

alastor lyall lupin (ally) 2002

OR

edward remus lupin (teddy) 1998

lyall john lupin II (lye) 2002

alastor harry lupin (ally) 2003

OR

edward remus lupin (teddy) 1998

lyall alastor john lupin (lye/potentially still aj) 2002

[also side note i don’t take on the canon timeline of the next gen because i think the trio had kids way to early (not in a judgy way because of age but i just have so much post war headcanons for them before they settle down) so only bill would be having his kids at the same time as teddy. which side note x2 makes losing their little girl so much harder seeing teddy play with victoire and dominique being born around the time they lost her.]

i’m leaning towards alastor john and lyall harry as twins or very close in age

~ i have a million thousand headcanons about remadora postwar/teddy/eleanor/ally/remus vs charlie/lyall vs remus tension/bills kids etc etc. especially losing the baby, i torture myself by thinking about it all the time. i already have heaps of headcanon post request things, that i promise i will actually do one day, so if u have anymore requests just add it to my pile in my asks i will do it this month promise i have one about the pregnancy i’m writing rn if yous still want it ~

[you-did-well-moon]

questions tag :))

i was tagged by the lovely @bearboyunho thank uuuu

relationships: I was in one for a maximum of three hours dkejek. Ill explain in the breakup question. This is definitely not a relationship im proud of. It caused me too many problems considering how short it was...

break-ups: I have so many trust issues and insecurities, i think i still have a long way to grow before i can enter a relationship, besides i havent met anyone yet. I didn't lead this person on, i treated him as a friend. And i usually spent more time with him since we were both in track. He caught feelings for me which i honestly knew about but i didnt say anything bc i didnt have feelings for him. One day during lunch with all my friends at the time he asked for a relationship. He later confessed to me he did this on purpose because he knew i would feel bad saying no to him, and that paired with the pressure of my friends, i said yes. He held my hand, and it just didn't feel right. Everything didnt feel right. So three hours later i got him alone and told him i wasnt ready for a relationship but that we could still be friends. He took it relatively well, but he avoided me. His cousin confronted me and told me he cried all weekend, but she said she understood and that she was glad i said no in the end which i was confused about but didnt question just wanting to leave it behind. Then it all started the next year. Out of nowhere he texted me, which was ???? Bc i never gave him my number, but i talked to him believing he was doing this on friendly intentions. lol i was a dumbass. Later my friend revealed to me he had lied to her and said i was paired up with him during a project. I also found out he asked her for pictures of me. His cousin which im friends with also told me she was sure he was not befriending me on good intentions, and that she was creeped out by him. My friends had continuously told me he would speak about me as if we were together to other people, and that he stared at me for weird periods of time. At this point im fucking scared and confront him and say i dont want to be friends with him and that i dont think us talking or being friends is healthy for either one of us. He continued texting me, making me feel bad when i didnt respond asking me if i hated him i had to eventually block him. He gave me a present on both valentines and Christmas which i rejected but he forced me to accept them. After class i always packed up my stuff slowly bc i had a good relationship with my teacher and talked to her. He stood in front of me and just stared at me while i packed. We actually had a kpop club, and one day he showed up. I was part of student council, and at the middle of the year he started attending. He sent me kpop memes to try to get my attention. I felt so unsafe i told my English teacher. Eventually he gave up when i started being firmer in my silence and overall attitude towards him. so yeah.... a relationship that didnt even last a day caused all this. I genuinely wish i had been more careful. The red flags were there from the beginning and i tried ignoring them bc i wanted to be nice. Dont do that, if someone maked you uncomfortable please dont feel bad and cut them off for as long as you need to. Anyways- nExT quEstiOn.

kids: i dont have any but i want twins so badly it's stupid. I honestly dont mind having kids that aren't twins. I just want two tbh. A girl and boy.

brothers and sisters: i have one sister who's five years younger than me. Im very close with my two cousins tho so theyre like sister to me too. They're older than me by more than five years.

pets: i have three dogs. Two shih tzus Otis and Bella, Bella is mother to Otis. He's the only puppy we kept from when Bella had puppies. I have Rocky a very clumsy english bulldog. I also have a beta fish called Suho.

surgeries: Ive had two. One when i was four to get my tonsils removed because i got sick a lot, and last year i got my gallbladder removed because i had gall stones. That one was so painful i couldnt laugh or do anything without everything hurting.

tattoos: None but i would like one. Not big ones, just small meaningful ones.

countries i’ve been to: Mexico....i miss it

been in an airplane: my family is not in the class where we can take an airplane to travel or even travel to other states. Ive only been on it twice for a contest i won.

been in an ambulance: Twice as much as i can remember. Once for my sister who had a really bad seizure when i took her to a doctors appointment and the other when they had to transport me to another hospital when they first found out i had gall stones.

i sing karaoke: no but you can usually find me singing along to a song on the radio or randomly around my house.

ice skating: I would love to try. The closest ive gotten is rollerblading. I can't do any fancy tricks but i can balance, but oh no i havent gone in such a long time. My poor rollerblades are collecting dust in my garage.

been on a cruise: ..... this is a joke right? Let me have enough money to buy groceries first.

driven a motorcycle: ah i would really like a motorcycle, but no never.

ridden a horse: Lolol all the time. When i was young my uncle helped out at some stables that were literally at the end of my street snd and he always took me a long with him. A lot of my family especially in Mexico and in the valley have ranchos which means they have horses and you can usually find me hanging out with the lovely animals.

stayed in a hospital: I once went because my head was killing me and i found out it was migraines. I had gall stones for seven months and stayed in the hospital about two times a month so yeah i was there a lot. And for the surgery of course.

favorite fruit or berry: Watermelon and Guayaba. Also green grapes.

favorite color: peach and aqua.

last text: "ye ok" it was from me to my cousin since i was gonna go to her house but she was with my grandma who tested positive for covid so we both decided it would be safer for me to keep my distance.

coffee or tea: coffee. i need it to survive. As long as it has sugar im ok. But tea is great for when my stomach hurts. I just prefer coffee. I could drink it any hour.

favorite pie: Pecan, especially with ice cream its so good. Key lime isnt bad either.

favorite pizza: i dont really care? I like all of them but when i was little and we'd go to the mall my dad would always get this big pizza that was big enough to have things stuffed inside it and it tasted so good. Its a good memory.

cat or dog: dog but i really want a cat.

favorite time of year: Chritmas and Thanksgiving always. I love it. Especially Christmas when my family gathers together and we play games and everyone brings a traditional Mexican dish. We stay until like 4 am and its always great.

met a star: That one woman who had an affair with george bush. I met her. That doesnt really count. Yeah no one, i met basketball players but i dont remember from which team or who they were. I met ted cruz. Cool story tho my english teacher knew one of shinee's choreographers.

flown a helicopter:..... umm. nO..

been on tv: Nah. Probably in the backround of some news things.

broken my leg: no ive never broken a bone surprisingly.

seen a ghost: i had sleep paralysis it was close enough.

been sick in a taxi: never even been in a taxi. Ive been on a uber tho.

Tags: @doyoungbunnyagenda @butterflybam @brighttragedy @saturnsluna @waterfallsandrosebuds @jooheonyonehunnit @leecherryyong

[dolansmith]

Thoughts on the “Trisha Drama”

I’m going to preface this with my previous thoughts of both sides. I didn’t know who Trisha was until after I found out about the vlog squad about a year ago. I didn’t mind her, i thought she brought out an interesting perspective to the group. Then I thought she was literally off her rocker. 

I loved the vlog squad bc I found them in a really difficult time in my life and they kept me from getting too deep into a depression. While I saw some of their mistakes, I saw the best in them all and hoped for change or at least some kind of accountability. 

This is gonna be really long and idk if anyone is even gonna read this/care lol but Im just so frustrated with a lot of the people that are into the vs. Like after really looking into everything that happened, I felt kind of ashamed to be backing the vs bc they’re doing some fucked up stuff tbh. 

So lets do a basic rundown of mistakes made. 

Mistakes in their public relationship:    -Trisha: made sexual jokes about jason’s friends, started arguments about her insecurities instead of starting a conversation.     -Jason: made sexual jokes about girl’s a decade younger than trisha (and 2 and a half decades younger than him), would complain about having to go do things trisha liked doing and would pout the whole time  (i.e. disneyland and a couple of the hamilton viewings), would egg on trishas insecurities, literally dumped her on a daily basis and call her crazy when she voiced said insecurities and then would basically get back together within an hour and practically give everyone whiplash, also talked about her weight and eating habits CONSTANTLY (fucking dick)    -David: inputted himself in their relationship, recorded their fights and encouraged their toxic behavior to both his friends and his audience

Mistakes in the “official” breakup:    -Trisha: talking about jason’s ex and kids, comparing david to ted bundy (a lil wild but tbh not that big of a deal bc no one actually believed thats what she meant but anyway), the brandon thing (we’ll come back to this)    -Jason: continuing to make jokes about fucking a 19/20 year old despite his gf saying she didn’t like it, not putting an end to David “pressuring him” to making said jokes, the brandon thing    -David: ignoring his “friend” when she said not to put something in his vlog, putting his image and career first

Mistakes after:    -Trisha: constantly going on rants about david and Jason.    -Jason: staying in contact with trisha secretly. (ill get back to this too)    -David: putting his image above all else. 

Now we’re going to get into some uncomfortable hot takes. I’m gonna get a whole lotta hate from stans but tbh idc anymore

The Brandon Thing (I’ve done some digging since her video exploding at Jeff): 

   -Brandon began a relationship with a high schooler. She was underage the first time they had sex. There’s receipts and timelines set up. I’d recommend Petty Paige’s Youtube video on it for specifics.     -Lot’s of vs fans say she only brought it up when her and Jason ended so that meant she didn’t really care, but I’d like to point out that she has stated (on more than one occasion) that she voiced her thoughts on this multiple times to the group in Private and no one cared. Y’all are always going on about how she should say whatever she has to say in private but when she does and is ignored, what then? Just a thought.     -Let’s also bring the rest of the vs up in this. How come none of them ever said anything? They’re the ones still out here tolerating him. Pretty hypocritical. I’m not gonna aim anything at the girls bc none of them have Brandon in their videos but the guys? Jeff, Jason, David, Todd and I think Scott too, have all had Brandon in at least one video. They’re out here talking shit about Trisha amongst each other but are friends with a predator? Lmao Okay, cool. 

Jason Keeping in Contact for months: 

   -This was dumb.     -As someone who has suffered from mental health issues and has been in a mental hospital and suffered from attachment AND abandonment issues, Trisha would’ve been better off had Jason ended things and kept them that way. Instead, he ended their public relationship and friendship. He kept her a secret from even his “friends” and then dragged on their “friendship” for months. For what? He should’ve just given her her things and closure and kept it pushing.     -On that, why did he keep her belongings for so long and refuse to give it back until she said something public about it? He ignored her calls and texts about her very expensive things for weeks. Then she made a video calling him out on it, and she got her stuff back.    -I’m seeing a pattern here, aren’t you?

The Jeff Thing (did some digging on him too...by digging i mean google):

   -This one makes my blood boil for several reasons. ESPECIALLY AFTER TODAYS VIDEO. It rlly put everything into perspective omg.     -The starbucks story that Trisha told was the same everywhere: ‘I saw Jeff at Starbucks and said hey. He ignored me and was such a pussy he left his order at the counter after having paid.’ His masculinity is SO FRAGILE that he twisted it into ‘I’m not gonna be fake with someone who fucked over my friend. Can’t fuck them up either tho lol’ and ‘i’m not gonna make shit easy on you, i’m gonna make them feel weird’. What a baby lmfao    -His assault joke rubbed me the wrong way. I know Jeff’s schtick is the whole “I was in jail for a few months and I was a drug dealer I’m big and scary” blah blah blah. Listen, I’ve met men that have been in jail longer (he was in for only 4 months he once said I think) and had worse upbringings than he did and HAD to do some of the shit Jeff was doing (which lemme remind yall, was on his own accord). The men that I know that have lived similar and worse lifestyles than Jeff, would never and I REPEAT NEVER, make a joke about assaulting a Woman over “fucking my friend over”, when the situation was what it was. Which was: an exposé, basically. That’s some petty shit, it’s for the birds. (Also, Todd and Jay’s jokes about the assault joke? Ain’t it. They were just as bad as Jeff’s original joke.)    -Do y’all know what Jeff’s been to jail for? He tried to assault someone that worked at a 7-Eleven after he and his dumbass friends were fucking around in the store and got yelled at and ended up assaulting a woman walking by.     -He also talked about her mental health issues. Maybe he wasn’t talking about her specifically, but it was REAL specific. He said that it was crazy that a “psychopath” that’s been in a mental hospital still had a platform on youtube. That they shouldn’t have one. Trisha made a really good point of, “some could say the same about your time in jail.” Because they could. And mental health can be managed. So can your outrageous anger issues, Jeff. This was really ignorant on his part.     -I also want to remind everyone about the time he said he didn’t understand how men could be sexually harassed. That all you had to do was say no.    -He says he likes to “make things awkward” and make everything a joke when really he’s just being ignorant and doesn’t want to get real hate when he gets inevitably called out

Trisha’s “Dirt”:

   -Trisha doesn’t know anything that the rest of us don’t. We’re just all IGNORING it. Why? Bc David’s charming and Todd and Jeff are pretty? Ridiculous. This is the last vlog squad post i’m going to make because I’m done. So the following is going to be a rundown on the “dirt” on them that made me come to the decision that I wouldn’t be supporting them anymore. I’ll also put my own thoughts and comments underneath in case y’all are curious. Staying silent about these situations is the same as complacency.     -Brandon Calvillo: Covered this but to reiterate, he dated a high schooler and slept with her/dated her knowing her age. He then lied about it in a video to cover his tracks.           *I am well aware that she was months from being 18. This doesn’t make it okay. What does a 26 year old have in common with a 17 year old? And just because this is the first girl we know about, doesn’t mean she’s the first at all or even the last.     -Durte Dom: He was accused of assault at vidcon.            *This hasn’t been confirmed. But it also hasn’t even been discussed. This girl is getting hate from vs stans and the vs have stayed silent. I can understand not wanting to show attention to people who make accusations for clout, but assault is serious and should at the Very Least be acknowledged privately or legally bc it could be considered slander. Don’t let your fans (or your friend’s fans) do your dirty work.      -Jeff Wittek: He has major anger issues. Makes jokes about assaulting women after actually having assaulted one in the past (accidentally but doesnt take away from what he did) and has made jokes about sexual harassment against men not being viable             *tbh he has a “pretty white boy complex”. Meaning he knows that he can say and do what he wants and most people will let it slide bc he’s a pretty white boy. No education needed.     -Jason Nash: Is friend’s with a predator, is quite possibly setting an awful example to his kids, namely his daughter.          *Listen. I’m a feminist, a woman should be able to decide what to do with her body after she turns 18. But being groomed and hit on by grown ass men when you’re barely legal, ain’t it. If you want to and feel ready, there’s nothing anyone can do to stop it BUT 9.9 times out of 10, that fucks a woman up in the future. One day, she is going to see her dad hitting on a 19/20 year old Tana and see that her dad’s  26 year old best friend dated a 17/18 year old and lied about specifics and might think that’s normal and how men should treat her. I won’t support that shit.

And as for all the other member’s of the vs, they either don’t care enough about what their friends or friends’ friends are doing, or they’re not bothering to even consider it’s happening and that isn’t cool either. 

Be better. 

As for Trisha, she’s had her own faults and fuckups, no doubt about it. I’m not a big fan of her content but i FELT for her. Her name has been dragged through the mud because of this more than anything else and it doesn’t sit right with me when her only real fuckup in THIS situation was bringing the ex and kids into it the way she did. Everything else either could have been avoided or she had a right to say to the public since they put everything about the relationship out in the open as much as she did. If Jason and David had reached out and admitted their own mistakes and asked her to stop talking about them online the way she was, she probably would’ve chilled out. What happened, what they and their fans (us) have done has been nothing short of traumatizing, no doubt. The way these 30 year old boys (Jeff, Todd, Scott and Jay) are reacting to her? They’re the real joke if we’re being honest.

Note: I’d also like to say that if you do still support them and have differing views than I do, I’ll respect you and your views no matter what. Everyones entitled to their opinion and thoughts. These are just mine. 

[coalessscence]

one of my favorite worst things to Think About are the ways herb’s casually neglectful childhood sometimes just....surfaces in the every day world of his life now. and since his whole shtick is my childhood was perfect my father is basically god and i have absolutely no parent issues idk what ur talking abt, he winds up having to flail, having to learn on the way down, and try to keep up a cover that he knew all along. which, usually, doesn’t work, and just makes it all the more sad. here’s a few examples i’ve thought of because i don’t love myself:

someone around the station gets stuck with something metal and comments they might need a tetanus shot. herb was definitely never taken to the doctor’s for a checkup and regular vaccinations as a child, and since he works daytime hours lucille takes the kids while he’s at work, so he literally has never had a shot and he doesn’t fully understand what vaccines are, aside from cultural osmosis, so he asks in telling confusion, “what’s that supposed to mean?” @piper-aileen-lenox specifically, thnx for making me think of this and ruining my life xx

when herb and lucille moved in together (i imagine they were engaged but maybe not married just yet) lucille made it clear to her rather sexist fiance that she was expecting him to tow the line around the house just as much as her, which he agreed to, except when she asked him to do the grocery shopping thinking that was a harmless thing he could do (not like she’d trust him to actually get the dishes clean or fold her clothes so they don’t wrinkle). they almost never had food consistently in the house growing up and if they did eat full meals, they only had the food for THAT MEAL around because 1. herb sr. and ruby (herb’s parents) lived an erratic lifestyle of little to no money or a whole lot of money but only for a second because it was burning a hole in herb sr.’s pocket, and because 2. ruby quickly learned spending money on food ahead was pointless because either herb sr. hecked off somewhere w/o warning and it went bad, or his deadbeat friends hung around and ate it all, so she only bought for that day if they had the money for anything. but since no one was ever around to TEACH herb anything and he figured most things out on his own, herb doesn’t understand all this and he literally thinks you’re not supposed to by food until you run out or that you have to throw out whatever you have left at the end of the week because....... who knows ???? that’s just what he thought. it caused multiple arguments early into herb and lucille’s relationship before she figured it out and explained it to him because he didn’t know well enough to ask.

when herb and lucille’s first child, bunny, was born, he had to be shown how to hold a baby by the doctor. he had literally never held or even interacted with a baby before until that moment. he had no siblings (that he knew of), he had no friends as a child because if he wasn’t the bully he was the target and he was an ass just like dear old dad so no one liked him anyway, and he had 0 other family. lucille realized in that moment as she watched his palpable confusion when she extended their newborn child to him that he was going to have a lot of learning and growing to do. she hoped he was ready for it.

god that time there was a station fam barbecue early into herb’s wkrp career and someone, maybe mr. carlson, is like ‘WHO WANTS TO BE THE GRILL MASTER’ like its a big deal and everyone is like oh it has to be herb bc he’s the newest out of us and hes aware all the men see it as a status symbol and he CAN’T be less of a man than another man bc Ego (tm) so hes like of course im the grill master !!! and then panics for the next thirty minutes because he’s literally never even stood next to a grill let alone used one HOW DOES IT WORK the first fifteen minutes he doesnt even have the gas on rip

when herb was, like, 15, he taught himself how to drive a car because one of his “friends” (peers who was a bully that he called a friend and hung out with to stop also getting bullied but who was still bullying him anyway, herb was just brainwashed into thinking that’s what friendship is) wanted them to go out cruising and herb wanted to be a Cool Guy and not look like a chump so he lied and said he could drive. they got pulled over, because of course they did, and herb got in big trouble for you know, driving w/o a licences. the kicker though is that herb didn’t fucking know you can’t drive without a license or that licenses and road tests and drivers ed were even a THING because he literally raised himself and no one ever  t a u g h t   h i m   a n y t h i n g. anyways his dad got called home to deal with it from wherever he was away at at the time and he got in big trouble for interrupting dear old dad’s work anyways so :) what a healthy family

surprisingly, herb DID know how to cook the basics. grilled cheese, pasta, stir fries, a couple casseroles. lucille asked him about it because he was always such a Gender Roles (tm) type of man who wouldn’t even wear a brighter shade of red than like. maroon. in case it got loosely contaminated with the concept of the color pink and he’d have to change his name and move to alaska. so why was he doing a “ womans job “ (cooking) and herb just looked confused and said “what, guys don’t cook?” she told him that no, they usually didn’t and would have laughed at her if she tried to make them, and he laughed awkwardly and absently stirred the pot on the stove and shrugged in mild confusion. “that’s weird. if i didn’t cook i’d have... starved, i guess.”

the bad news is his cooking wasnt GREAT and lucille was happy to take over because again.........self taught. and he has one (1) brain cell so. not Great

LITERALLY DIDN’T KNOW ALL CLOTHES DON’T HAVE TO BE DRY CLEANED. his dad literally wore clothes that had to be dry cleaned Every Day (and we wonder why the tarlek family was short on the food budget god) (and they were ugly clothes too akdhfjfg) and ofc if ruby washed her clothes, it was while herb was at school. he dry cleaned so many clothes that do Not Make Sense to dry clean in college before he slowly figured that out.

did not know what an allowance was. bunny asked him for one and not willing to seem stupid to his swift daughter he told her to ‘ask her mother’, who thought it was hecking weird that her money obsessed husband would say that, so she asked him why and after several long minutes he just shrugged helplessly and said “what’s an allowance?”

don’t even get me started on herb and lucille planning their wedding ( ‘what kind of stuff should we put on the gift register?’ “put on the WHAT?”  ‘what are we going to put on top of the cake?’ “there’s gonna be CAKE?”  ‘i can’t wait for daddy to walk down the isle with me, it’ll mean a lot to him’ “your DAD is gonna walk you down the isle....?? but you’re marrying ME, right?”   ) also herb not knowing the wedding look of the bride is supposed to be a Secret and barging into the room w a question or smth while lucille and her bridesmaids are getting ready, and everyone is hella miffed and he’s like WHAT i’ve seen her naked before and theyre all like THATS NOT THE POINT HERB

herb did Not Know about seasonal allergies. he just........didn’t know. he just thought god hated him and every spring and fall his head sprung a leak. and the whole time he was growing up no one A. listened to him complain about them and put 2 and 2 together, nor B. just taught him about basic first aid stuff in general for that matter he doesnt know shit. anyways, then lucille was like why are you such a tough guy just stop complaining and take some medicine for your stupid allergies and he was like take some what for my what now

ANYWAYS herb’s mom left while he was v young and he doesn’t remember much about her. herb’s dad was literally   n e v e r   home. the people herb’s dad left him with would work for obscenely low amounts of pay or owed herb sr. money and largely used all the money for their own food, drugs, alcohol, or other more unsightly business, and left herb alone to fend for himself. this is the disaster human that that produced, thanks, family dynamics! don’t abandon your children, kids, thanks for coming to my ted talk

[bernie-bear]

fe13 modern au

chrom: conglomerate ceo, slave to capitalism :(

avatar: tenured history & politics professor. has been featured on a few ted talks

lissa: youtuber/instagram person who bakes. has like 2 recipe books out

frederick: works in the same corp as chrom in compliance. his employees hate him

sully: sports coach for a women's soccer team

virion: shifty investor who only flies first class

stahl: operations manager at a local bank

vaike: truck driver. i dont know i dont care for vaike

miriel: tenured biochemistry research professor

sumia: bakes alongside lissa occasionally but otherwise runs her own shop

kellam: government intelligence officer working in covert ops. im serious people who work in that kind of stuff need to be inconspicuous and who else is better for the job

donnel: high school counselor

lonqu: head of security at basilios company

ricken: that white guy who has a fulbright teaching kids english in asia

maribelle: corporate lawyer for chrom's conglomerate

panne: wildlife conversation project coordinator

gaius: con artist - think nick wilde but way less edgy. but everyone thinks he manages an ice cream shop

cordelia: non profit fundraising coordinator. previously worked in law

gregor: works under lonqu in security

nowi: movie actress!!! she loves doing fantasy movies

libra: priest. what else

tharja: pharmaceutical researcher. scary concept!

olivia: choreographer for musical artists

cherche: preschool teacher who also does those cooking classes at home

henry: a vet fresh out of vet school

the second gens are all college students

lucina: international relations major slated to take over her dad's company. has been to a frat party once and will never come back

morgan: dual major in history and math. doesnt know what theyre gonna in the future other than be an academic

owain: english major and theater minor who looks like a frat guy but is quickly disappointing to all the thots and abgs!

kjelle: physio major on a sports scholarship who'll probably become a professional athlete

laurent: chemistry major who'll go until his phd to stay in a lab forever watching molecules go pew pew under his microscope to get paid

cynthia: theater major and very much a social butterfly. is one of those annoying acapella people

brady: music major who had to beg his mom to let him be one after he showed that he was no good at any academics. occasionally goes out

yarne: biology major whos probably not gonna use his major after grad. tells everyone hes not gonna go out but has major fomo, then regrets going to the party hes at

severa: econ major because no one likes econ majors. is stuck in the vicious spiral that is hookup culture

noire: computer science major who wonders why shes still in the major because its upped her anxiety. plays the harp for the orchestra

nah: philosophy major who hopes nobody knows of her mother's identity. ever since she joined the mock trial team she knew she was going into law school

inigo: physics major and dance minor although no one believes hes a physics major. is unfortunately the guy who either plays sicko mode or mo bamba

gerome: computer science major who took the major because it makes cash and he doesnt have to interact with others. works at the library and hates it

[trickstarbrave]

no offense to the directors bc i know they never intended for this to happen but the disney adaptation of the little mermaid lead to a lot of mainstream feminist critique of the story of the little mermaid that is inherently flawed in that NONE of them do ANY research on the original story at all besides read it

its not about “women losing their agency and then dying and i guess the author thought that was ~romantic~ in the 1800′s therefore its bad”. thats only an interpretation you can get if you willfully ignore the entire context of the story

hans was a man who wrote fairy tales for kids, that was what he did. however he was also gay, in a time where that was unacceptable. but that doesnt mean that just bc homophobia is running rampant that your emotions suddenly dont exist. he had a man he loved, and that man likely due to society, married a woman and their (debated if it was official or not) relationship came crashing to a halt. 

the little mermaid was written at that time. and it wasnt about heterosexual romance at all. it had characters in a heterosexual romance bc that was all that was pretty much acceptable to write, especially for a man who wrote childrens stories. and its kind different from a lot of his other famous works. the little mermaid cant talk not because its ‘romantic’ or says something about the female gender, but because when youre attracted to someone of the same gender its impossible to voice those thoughts or emotions. the little mermaid literally lacks an ability to come out and tell him that she loves him because society doesnt let her. and she sort of knew this and gave it up in the attempt to chase after the love she knew realistically she could not have.

however in traditional narratives of non-straight romance, she is rewarded by having loved regardless. she is given an opportunity by her sisters to give it up, return to the sea, and forget this ever happened. all she has to do is destroy the object of her love. kill him. the options is metaphorical of course and open to interpretation on that end: either kill the object of your affections by learning to hate them and your attraction, swear off love, or pretend it doesnt exist (and probably others that never occurred to me). however, she cant bring herself to do so, to destroy someone she loves so much and return to a life where she continues to ignore it. 

and her reward is kind of a forced moral lesson but it still stands: she gets the opportunity to go to heaven. the love that society deems unspeakable and unthinkable is not wrong in the eyes of divine powers that ruled hans’ life. instead loving was an act of courage, something that was divinely rewarded, not punished. and i think for the time, thats a really groundbreaking message. that even though it hurt him so deeply to watch someone he loved marry someone else bc of society, he didnt think of that painful love as immoral. the little mermaid died in that she would rather ‘give herself up’ than hurt him. 

tl;dr: the little mermaid is actually a sad gay love story in which gay people are not demons or sinful and immoral and instead the message is ‘it is better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all’ and was written by a gay man venting abt the person he loved getting married for society. yet the mainstream narrative put forth by disney and the lack of proper research by mainstream feminist critics purposefully ignore this when its SO INTERESTING bc its just easy picking. and then they wonder why the snow queen has female characters w agency and start to argue if hans even wrote it and i wanna rip my fucking hair out every day over this

anyways thanks for coming to my ted talk 

[zareleonis]

Hi! I was wondering, do you ship Sabezra or find them as friends?

@thebeth02 i promised you i’d answer this I’M SORRY IT TOOK ME SO LONG (and IS so long haha)

tl;dr version is no i mostly prefer sabine and ezra as friends/siblings and i don’t HATE the concept but also i honestly think sabine is a lesbian SO YANNO ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

UNGODLY LONG VERSION:

if you asked me this circa season 1 i’d pretty firmly say no, i don’t like sabine and ezra as a couple. now i would say it’s still not really my thing but im…. more okay with the concept i guess? mostly because they BLESSEDLY dropped ezra’s SUPER AWKWARD crush on her.

like just. the scenario of “boy with crush on girl who is very clearly NOT INTERESTED” is just a huuuge turn off for me. sabine is consistently irritated with his awkward flirtations. doesn’t hate it enough to tell him to fuck off, but she either rolls her eyes or has a teasing comeback for him every time. she didn’t think of it as a serious issue so she just tried to ignore it. i don’t go for stuff where a girl is really plainly not into a boy who likes her, as sabine was. i don’t like the implications of that AT ALL.

and ezra’s crush well.. ezra’s rebel journal and bits from the rebels novelizations by michael kogge show that it was pretty heartfelt (check waaaay back in my ‘ezra and sabine’ tag). but even so, sabine’s assessement in ‘sabine’s rebel sketchbook’ of “he’s like a 14 yr old kid he’ll get over it” was Prettyyyyy accurate nonetheless.

i think his crush was a function of two things. one, the really standard situation of a teenage kid totally knocked off his feet by a SUPER COOL slightly older girl – she makes AWESOME EXPLOSIONS!! and DYES HER HAIR! and can PAINT amazingly!!! and two, ezra’s tendency at this point in his life to latch onto anyone who is nice to him and doesnt abandon him. he was a super sad and lonely kid. after his initial reservations he latched onto the entire ghost crew super quickly. same with ahsoka and rex. i think him getting a puppy dog type crush on sabine in this situation

since ezra got over that crush, i’m a lot more amenable to the IDEA of them as a couple i don’t like the idea that oooh he’s secretly still harbored those feelings the whole time. i dislike it for the same reasons i didn’t like the fact he had that crush in the first place. just that “if you wait long enough EVENTUALLY she’ll see the light” is icky to me.

BUT i think, as sabine and ezra have grown closer the mutual respect, care and admiration is all there. these kids love each other a lot, period. i can buy a scenario where Something More™ grows out of that, as long as it’s completely unrelated to ezra’s intitial crush. i like situations where two people who care for each other deeply for a long time experience a shift in their relationship where those feelings develop into a different kind of love, and they figure out where do they go from there.

ultimately though, i just love sabine and eza WAY TOO MUCH as friends/siblings to seriously entertain the pairing. i love the way they mess around and tease each other like brother and sister. i love how they fit into the little family the entire ghost team has built. it warms my heart a lot. the loving and close relationship sabine and ezra have just makes me SUPER SUPER HAPPY 😊

i think the brand of teasing that goes on between sabine and ezra fits really well for people who have a sibling relationship but not-so-much for romantic prospects. like, teasing your kid brother and bickering because as much as you love each other, you get on each other’s nerves, THAT i adore so much.

the other thing is i honestly just think sabine is WAY TOO GAY to ever like ezra That Way 😹 if there was ever a character who makes way too goddamn good a lesbian for me to pass up it’s sabine wren hahaha. my lesbian senses just Know 😜 i mean does sabine EVER look like a lesbian?? if i didn’t know better i’d even say she intentionally looks that damn gay 😹🏳️‍🌈 also sabine totally has it SUPER BAD for ketsu.

and uh (MAJOR PROJECTION TIME SORRY), i know sabine’s Issues with her family mostly stem from other stuff in canon buuuu~uut. i relate to it a lot and YES it has to do with me being gay so that resonates with me too. it’s important to me on a personal level in terms how i relate with sabine’s story, but it’s also something that could very plausibly add another REALLY interesting layer to her relationship with her family.

ANYWAYS THANK YOU FOR COMING TO MY TED TALK AND READING THIS ENTIRE STUPID THESIS ON SABINE AND EZRA. IF YOU ACTUALLY READ ALL OF THIS YOU DESERVE SOME SORT OF PRIZE

[unremarkableremi-blog]

Jinkies! It’s ( REMINGTON “REMI” HICKS ), the ( 16 ) year old ( JUNIOR ). Around Coolsville they are known as the ( THE MOUSE ) because they are ( FAITHFUL ), ( RESILIENT ), and ( LOYAL ), but we all know they can also be ( WITHDRAWN ), ( FEARFUL ), and ( ESCAPIST ). Some people think they look like ( ADELAIDE KANE ) but we all know that’s just a mask.

( RILEY, 24, CST, & SHE/HER. ) 

hi hello i’m the other riley or riles and i am a biologist/zoologist who is in her last semester of her second major (journalism) wHY DID I DO THat. I rly like pizza and weird animals and environmental activism and writing and angsting and plotting and i’M UP FOR ANYTHING anyway thx for coming to my TED talk this is my idiot child:

remi was the product of an affair between her mom (a cashier at a dollar store) and her manager

she was born in a family who was still is dirt poor, living in a trailer park

her mom’s husband is a construction worker who somehow was relatively okay w the affair and bastard baby cuz he got a discount at the dollar store nOT EVEN KIDDING and they already had one daughter (Melissa) who was 15 when remi was born

melissa has always hated remi

melissa’s dad wasn’t a fan of remi either but his rage was easier to avoid cuz he had to work

melissa has made remi’s life a living hell since day one she sucks

remi’s mom was always working her ass off to put some food on the table so remi barely got to see her

remi started being a latchkey kid and fending for herself to avoid melissa’s insanity and she just kinda hung around town and befriended everyone’s pets and caught bugs

which made her fall in love w science and she started reading all the books, turns out she’s p damn smart unless u give her wuthering heights she will use it as hamster bedding

then one day melissa’s dad convinced remi’s mom to run a “quick errand” for a local sketchy dude and surprise surprise they got caught cuz angst-whoring

remi’s mom got five years in a minimum sec prison and her husband got 10 years because it wasn’t his first offense thug lyfe

so ofc remi was placed in her sister’s custody which was both of their worst nightmares but melissa would be getting some money so she shut her stupid mouth

melissa gives exactly zero fucks about remi, she’s in her early 30s and doesnt care if remi’s not home in the middle of the night or if she has food at all, school supplies, hot water, etc. plus she keeps kicking her out when she has people over, there could be a snowstorm outside but remi has to gtfo if melissa wants to get it on w some douche

for remi, it was hell on earth. she knew she was already unpopular in school and around town for being the bastard baby and a weirdo, now she was the weirdo bastard daughter of two convicted felons

so far, remi’s mom has served four months out of her sentence and remi misses her like crazy. she tries to call and visit as much as she can but melissa rarely drives her and buses are expensive so it gives her a hUGE SAD

she tries chasing her sads away by burying herself in academics and getting awesome grades and being a huge nerd who will ramble about animals to anyone that will stop and listen for a sec

and ofc she works at pet store and helps out vets and helps w grooming of pets

remi is 5′1 smol who’s always wearing oversized and worn out hand me downs, wandering around town, trying to find somebody who will not judge her and just wants to talk and be friends. she’s desperate for acceptance and kindness since she doesn’t rly get it at home also food #poorAF

her desire to help others is so strong it gets annoying?? like pLS LET ME HELP YOU WITH BIOLOGY I WILL BE THE BEST TUTOR BE MY FRIEND FOREVER kind of thing

if unattended, she will steal your dog

yeah just love her she is kinda cute and innocent and dumb

MORE TO COME IDK I AM WORKING ON A REAL BIO THAT WILL MOST LIKELY BE A TRILLION PAGES AND A CONNECTIONS PAGE XO LOVE ME