#technically speaking we can explain all the dates and times and things that Should Not Be There

[amywritesthings]

dating on airplane mode. | part one.

( Read on AO3 )

Pairing: levi ackerman x f!reader (attack on titan / shingeki no kyojin) Word Count: 3.9k Summary: So you're dating your neighbor who also happens to be a sex hotline dom named Levi Ackerman. Stranger things have happened, right?

Warnings: 18+ MINORS DNI - alternate universe (modern), slow burn, eventual smut, sex work, neighbors au, newly established relationship, dual pov, the direct sequel to Press Four For More Options Credits: dividers by @saradika-graphics submitted for @levievent 's #levimonth24 / day 22: neighbors

part two. | masterlist

“I'm seeing someone.”

Tea goes flying — metaphorically and physically.

When he confessed a new (and very unexpected) development in his (borderline nonexistent) dating life, Levi hadn’t anticipated Hange Zoe turning directly towards Erwin Smith to unleash a devastating spit-take attack to the face.

It’s a direct hit.

Erwin heroically takes the brunt of the damage, so at least his furniture is spared.

(Levi didn’t need to spend the rest of the afternoon scrubbing down the already scrubbed-down living room.)

Hange’s shout is shrill, the realization hitting them like a full-throttle freight train.

“You’re what?”

“He said he’s seeing someone,” Erwin answers in monotone before Levi can even try. 

The tall blonde extends a hand to leisurely grab the napkin cradling the bottom of his tea saucer. In true Erwin fashion, he doesn’t even blink at Hange’s dramatics — or their consequences unto him.

He raises the napkin to blot the side of his face sprinkled with a mixture of freshly-brewed lavender tea and Hange’s saliva.

(Then again, Hange could abruptly bang pots and pans in the middle of the night and Erwin would merely call it a minor inconvenience to his sleep routine.)

“No, no, I heard what he said,” Hange recovers with a crack to their voice, “but I can’t tell if he’s messing with us.”

“I’m not,” Levi flatly states.

“Okay, but how do we know?”

“Hange—”

Except it’s Erwin intercepting once more. “Because he would never pretend to have a significant other when one of his closest friends happens to be you.”

Hange squints, pushing their glasses up the bridge of their nose.

“Why? ‘Cause I joked that I’d stalk him the next time he finally found a date? That was one time, Erwin.”

Erwin rolls his neck to the right, offering Hange a pair of thick, disbelieving eyebrows.

“Technically speaking, Zoe, you threatened to stalk either of us if you caught even a sniff that we could be in the midst of a romantic pursuit. Plus, we’re well aware of the disguise kit collecting dust in the trunk of Moblit’s car.”

An instant shit-eating grin passes across their lips.

“Ha. Fair.”

If Levi’s eyeballs could roll any further into the back of his skull, they’d get stuck.

“However,” Erwin adds, those bold blue eyes flickering back towards Levi, “it doesn’t explain why we were in the dark until now. At the very least, we should hope you would feel safe enough to confide in us about someone you are serious about dating.”

Yeah. 

Out of his two friends sitting across from him, Levi figured Erwin would be the most suspicious of the surprise announcement.

Now that it’s been a few days since That Fateful Night, he doesn’t feel as self-conscious to confess his new reality.

It was as good of a time as any to rip the proverbial band-aid off.

(Besides, it was only a matter of mistakes before his friends learned the truth for themselves.)

Hange, Erwin, Moblit — they’re his only remaining connections tying him to this city. The others from his gym days have all found offers in other towns, returned to their old homes—

Moved on.

Meeting Erwin Smith in boot camp changed the trajectory of his life, for better or worse. 

Levi had known the man longer than he knew anyone else — but only by a few days and some change, considering he was destined (Hange’s words, not his) to meet the hyper scientist and their subdued partner, Moblit, in the army as well.

Then, as if attached to the hip, all four of them agreed to work at Erwin’s gym.

When that fell through, Erwin found the Scout Services Hotline.

.

.

— —

.

.

    The announcement came to him one summer evening with a printed job description and a six pack of beer.

Levi assumed Erwin’s confession on taking a sex hotline job had been one weird, shitty joke.

Picturing stoic, pragmatic Erwin Smith telling people how to fuck themselves in their bedrooms late at night for the almighty dollar felt obscene. 

Hell, it was obscene.

Levi didn’t want to consider his oldest friend in such a compromising position, but there it was laid before him without shame or fear of judgment.

Becoming a part-time sex worker for Erwin was as noncommittal as taking up a fleeting niche interest — like exotic bird watching or crocheting sweaters for fucking cats.

“At the gym, we improved upon people’s lives,” Erwin had told him while sipping his beer, staring out to the city sightline from Levi’s balcony. “Who has the authority to say this job isn’t doing something similar to those who may be lonely?”

“You would make yapping on a damn sex hotline prophetic,” Levi scoffed in return. “Selling some shitty porn script a dozen times a night sounds like the closest you could get to Hell.”

“I disagree,” Erwin argued without heat. “When I interviewed, they stated every employee is given the ability to do as they please. To show their strengths and make it their own.”

“Bullshit.”

“It isn’t.” 

Erwin rested the beer bottle on the knee of his trousers. 

“Flexible work hours give me the ability to find another place the gym can call home. The pay would certainly cover any initial costs after several years.”

“Several years?”

Levi frowned, sitting up straighter in his chair.

“Erwin… c’mon. Just take a second to listen to yourself.”

“I’m only offering a chance for you to do the same. You may not be fond of people, Levi, but you’re loyal to a stubborn fault.”

Erwin gave him a sidelong glance.

“I know you won’t put in applications to go to any other gym.”

“Tch.”

A dismissive sound was all he could muster at the time.

He always hated how Erwin could open the cavity of his chest and put his damn bleeding heart on display.

“Who says I haven’t been window shopping to pass the damn unemployment time?”

“I wish you would,” Erwin replied with a heavy sigh. “Your skills are better when in use, not lying waste with the rest of us.”

“Hange and Moblit’re doing just fine.”

Hange, a self-proclaimed babbler, returned to Paradis University to make headway on some fascinating research projects side by side with Moblit. 

It was where they belonged, really.

“Fine, then lying waste with me.”

After a beat, Erwin slid his hand across the space between their chairs and held out a slip of paper.

"Look it over. Really sit down and think about what you did for our fighters and see where I’m coming from. You have a knack for leading. Of making people believe in themselves at their lowest."

He made it a point to stop. Stare.

Levi bit his tongue, meeting his friend's stern gaze.

"Conventional or not, you would still be helping people. Even if it’s a job for a month, at least you’ll be putting a hell of a lot of money in your pocket. It's better than waiting for my signal to move on.”

.

.

— —

.

.

    The bastard was always great at a rousing speech.

That night was the night Levi plugged in the damn website and read the job description.

By morning, he had submitted his application for a part-time hotline employee that included an .mp3 file auditioning his voice.

Erwin must have told his boss that he had a life-long friend possibly interested in the position, because by that night?

Levi Ackerman had a job.

A night turned into a month.

A month turned into six. 

Six to a year.

Suddenly denying begging, pleading people from their chased orgasms became as second nature as completing an Excel sheet.

Yet nothing else changed.

Levi still kept to himself.

Considering the friend group worked odd hours — Erwin with his own clientele, Moblit working towards his Masters, and Hange testing the scientific project of the week at the same university when unsupervised — it was easy to.

Wake up. Work out. Eat. Run errands. Clock in for work. Clock out. Eat. Sleep. 

Repeat.

Routine.

Hell, a lot of his life worked like a well-oiled machine until you showed up.

Now his world is slightly spinning off-axis, and he knows:

Without talking to his friends about his (uncharacteristically selfish and) impulsive decision, everything could very well go up in flames.

(Because when it comes to sticking matters of the heart and Levi Ackerman in one room, the former never walks out.)

After a pregnant pause in this three-way stand-off, Hange leans in, pressing both hands onto the tops of their thighs. 

“So when you say you’re seeing someone, you mean like… romantically?”

“As opposed to what?” Levi flatly asks.

“Well, seeing someone could mean anything, especially for you,” Hange reasons. Levi’s eyes narrow when Erwin gives that short huff of air through his nose like he’s stifling a laugh. “You could be seeing someone about finally fixing your dryer.”

“Seriously?”

“I’m just saying, romantically isn’t the first idea that comes to mind!”

“I have to agree with Zoe,” Erwin finally states, shifting his blue eyes to Levi’s. “You never mentioned that you had met someone in our group chat, and you haven’t made any changes in your schedule that suggest otherwise.”

Levi can’t help but scoff.

“Oh, so now you’re following Hange’s goddamn Google calendar?”

That fucking calendar.

The ‘we’re so busy but we can’t lose touch just because the gym went under’ calendar hastily made at two in the morning and sent with a declaration of war if no one accepted the invite.

All four of them did.

(Then again, Moblit didn’t have much of a choice.)

“I check on occasion,” is Erwin’s short rebuttal, before sitting up straighter. “But the former argument stands: you didn’t tell us that you were dabbling in the dating scene.”

“Wouldn’t really call it dabbling, Erwin,” Levi huffs, picking up his tea cup by clawing the rim of the ceramic. “Shit just kind of happened.”

“Uh-uh,” Hange interrupts. “We’re not playing coy right now, Levi. I want details: name, height—”

“Occupation,” Erwin agrees.

“Where they’re from.”

“If they have siblings.”

“Do they live near here?”

“If they’re allergic to cats.”

An involuntary grimace passes over Levi’s face.

“Ooh! We also need to know if they like tennis,” Hange adds excitedly. “Don’t trust someone who likes tennis, spectator or player. They’re always too put together with an underlying layer of batshit crazy.”

Erwin halts mid-sip of his tea. 

“...I like tennis.”

Hange’s thumb and middle finger sharply snap. “Exactly.”

Enough.

Levi hastily pushes his black fringe out of his eyes with his free hand. “I— No, Jesus, can we stop speculating about her?”

“Why?” Erwin challenges.

“Because I told you what you needed to know,” Levi challenges without tripping over his words. “And I’d prefer to keep the rest of myself.”

“Ah, her.”

When he turns his attention to Hange, there’s a wicked glimmer in their eye.

Well, fuck him.

Too much has already been said.

Hange whistles low. 

“So how recently was this fair maiden introduced into thy friend’s life?”

“Don’t start talking like a freak, Four Eyes,” he warns them while they suppress a cackle between pressed lips. “And — fuck, fine. If no one is going to let it go—”

“We aren’t.”'

Erwin interrupts, making it two against one.

With a set glare at his blonde friend, the smaller man sinks further into his chair and sighs with reluctant resolve. 

“I… met her a few days ago. It...”

Trailing off, he sets his tea cup down to rub at his temples with one hand.

This is going to bring on a headache. 

He really doesn’t need it on a work night.

“You’re both going to have an opinion on the how, and trust me, so do I.”

Hange’s face screws up in confusion, but he sees it out of the corner of his eye.

Erwin grows still. Contemplative.

Yeah, he knew this was going to go terribly.

“Huh?” Hange whips their ponytail back and forth to look between both men, smacking themself on the sides of their face. “Why wouldn’t we approve of how? Is it one of the old fighters?”

Levi scoffs, dropping to sit back in his chair. “I’d rather choke.”

“Then I’m not following. You don’t even talk to cashiers at the grocery store.”

“When did she call the hotline?” Erwin asks, cutting straight through the bush instead of beating around it.

His stare is almost indiscernible. Stern.

(Protective.)

The lightbulb clicks. Hange finally settles their attention on him. 

“Whoa — wait, she’s a…”

“Former client,” Levi confesses after Hange trails off. “Emphasis on the former part.”

The room grows silent.

Levi doesn’t have the capacity to see Hange’s true reaction, because he’s keeping eye contact with Erwin.

Their own telepathic argument bounces back and forth like that very proverbial tennis ball Hange had so teasingly laid down.

The ethics of it all;

The logistics of what it could mean for the future;

The gravity of this choice and knowing its weight is crushing him.

Erwin’s gaze softens a fraction.

Levi’s shoulders relax, if only a little.

“And how did that opportunity come to pass?” the taller blonde finally asks, but it isn’t as harsh as Levi anticipated. 

Hell, it’s curious.

Willing — to not judge; to hear him out.

“Accidentally stumbled into her at the bar down the street,” Levi confesses.

Stumbled is an understatement.

.

.

— —

.

.

    “So then — what does this mean?”

He doesn’t know.

God, he has no fucking clue.

Just like he had no fucking clue you’d be at this bar tonight; that you not only lived in the area, but in the same goddamn building just a few floors south.

You were meant to be a fluke thing.

A moment of weakness.

An anomaly he could solve like every other problem in his life, one he could reason to death and move on from once you realized that this hotline is a slippery slope to financial debt.

At the end of the day, it wasn’t meant to be real.

The calls, the laughter, the exchange of stories felt real, but that’s the selling point.

Imagining idealism.

He could send as many discounted invoices as he could to management to ease the cost of your calls, but there was only so much he could do from his position.

Still—

That being said, he wanted this.

For the first time in a long time, he wanted something.

Ever since Erwin’s gym went under and the staff were forced to find something else in the interim, Levi Ackerman turned off his emotions. His passion.

Money was tight. 

Bills were bills. 

But there are worse things to do than apply to a remote-working sex hotline with the promise of flexible hours, medical insurance, and the opportunity to get away from people for a while.

Maybe he hadn’t realized he was simply going through the motions of buying a morning tea at the coffee shop down the street. 

Maybe he hadn’t noticed that his drive to push himself to the brink of exhaustion at the gym all but disappeared.

Maybe he existed to simply exist.

Then you called.

Petra had pinged him to let him know that there was someone looking for a deep voice — not surprising — with a tendency to overtalk and overthink.

Easy.

Those types always cave the second you call them a pet name or sprinkle a little praise.

Yet you burst into his life like a damn firework to the face and he’s never recovered since.

Being nervous is a staple on these calls. He’s heard every justification in the book just as he’s witnessed people use the hotline like they’re robots.

You wanted to talk.

Petra doesn’t send people to him if they want to talk.

(Did she know, somehow, that he needed this?)

Conspiracies aside, the last two weeks became some of the best of his life.

Now you knew his face, and he knew yours.

And Christ, you were beautiful. 

Your voice was one thing — like a soothing balm to his insomnia — but your face nearly took him right the hell out.

Even in the mirror backsplash of the bar, he couldn’t stop staring. Didn’t want to, not when he finally saw what he wanted right in the palm of his hand.

So he was honest.

Honest about his life, his job, his black hole of an existence — maybe to scare you away so you’d choose better than a guy like him.

That he was the first to break the rules.

That he was sorry, because you weren’t looking for more baggage after a shit breakup with a shithead of a guy.

You didn’t care.

So he decided to rip a page out of his goddamn advice book:

Be selfish.

“Well, if you don’t get too wasted with your friends tonight—”

Autopilot.

Everything is on autopilot when he picks up that damn pen and starts to scribble on a napkin, allowing his nervous system to suckerpunch his logic right out the damn window.

“—and you end up going to the gym tomorrow—”

Bail.

Bail, bail, bail, before you make a damn fool of yourself, Levi Ackerman.

He doesn’t.

He straightens his spine, folds the napkin, and reaches for your hand. 

The heat of it almost makes his stomach clench.

If he were bolder, then maybe he’d steal you away from your friends. Keep asking questions to make you talk more. Watch as your eyes light up about your favorite things—

He can’t. Won’t.

You’re with your friends. He’s already taken enough time away from them for you.

“—give me a call.”

Maybe he’s chickenshit for running, but at least there’s a part of him brave enough to leave him his personal cell number in the palm of your hand.

Before you can say anything, he drops some money on the counter to pay for both drinks and a tip and leaves to walk home.

To contemplate.

(Assuming you likely won’t call. He wouldn’t blame you.)

The night air leaves a sobering sting on his cheeks as he steps outside.

It’s considerably quieter than the cramped space of the bar, but cabs bustle in the street.

His pocket vibrates not once but twice.

(So not a text.)

Fishing his phone out, Levi squints at the ‘Unknown Caller’ ID staring up at him.

He swipes right to accept said call, pressing the phone to his ear.

“Hello, Levi Ackerman speaking.”

“Hi, Levi. It’s formerly Scarlet.”

His heart falls out of his ass.

Whipping back around to the tinted windows of the bar, Levi can’t help but look for that now-familiar face.

You’re blocked by an endless sea of conversations and bodies, but he still searches.

“My schedule just opened up,” you tell him from the other side of the line, your voice airy like you hold a secret. “I know it’s a little late for some coffee, but — are you free for some tea now?”

Shit.

Maybe he should be giving the headset for the hotline over to you.

“Depends,” Levi exhales. “Any shop worth a damn is closed at this hour.”

“Shit, you’re right.”

He liked it when you cursed. 

Hell, he liked it when you weren’t afraid to be yourself around him the most.

“There’s a pop-up shop about six floors above yours,” Levi reasons with a shrug he assumes you can’t see; autopilot, “if you don’t mind walking a neighbor home.”

.

.

— —

.

.

    “You said that?”

Hange, now at the brink of teetering off of their chair, gawks.

Levi blinks twice, realizing he’s given more of the story than he wanted to.

That they know it’s serious — dead fucking serious for him, actually — and that you’re his neighbor.

Yeah, he didn’t believe it either until you said yes.

“What?” Levi asks. “Something wrong?”

“No, that was just fucking smooth, dude,” Hange whistles low, impressed. “Pop-a-button-and-open-a-window kinda smooth. Holy shit.” They thumb towards Erwin. “You teach him to talk like that!?”

“Self-taught, I’m afraid,” Erwin hums. “Can’t take the credit.”

Hange flops back into their chair unceremoniously. “Jeeeez.”

“Six floors down, then?”

There’s a rare tint of pride in Erwin’s tone, like there’s a joke somewhere in that question he isn’t saying. 

Levi immediately narrows his eyes.

“Yeah. She’s been my fuckin’ neighbor all this time, if you can believe that.”

He sure as hell can’t. The fact that you’re six floors away — have been — has kept him up at night.

He could run down there right now and show you off to his friends.

He could leave you home-cooked meals if you’re running behind at your office job.

He could do a lot of things, but—

“Is she requesting you to end your time at Scout Services?” Erwin asks, interrupting his trailing thoughts.

Levi’s stormy eyes meet a contemplative, oceanic stare.

“...no.”

A beat passes.

Despite his trepidation, he explains himself.

“She’s not asking me to quit it. Says she gets it, a job’s a job, but I don’t know how true that’ll be in the long run.”

“And you believe her?”

He knows Erwin’s skepticism isn’t unfounded, but it sets a fire in his belly.

Questioning you, the newfound gravity keeping him grounded on planet earth.

(You're just a stranger to him, too, at the end of the day, but you don't feel like one. Not really.)

“I can’t expect anyone to stay neutral about what the fuck it is we do, Erwin," he reasons diplomatically. "I can say everything on my mind and put it on paper, but I’m sure the doubt will still creep in. Everything’s too new to tell. It won’t be easy, but it…”

He sighs, running his hand once more through his straight-and-narrow black hair. 

“I just need you two dumbasses to keep me in check. I can’t—”

Hange frowns, and he hates the sympathetic tone they take when they say his name. 

“Levi—”

“Four Eyes,” Levi interrupts stronger yet weaker in resolve, effectively shutting down their protest, “I can’t fuck this up. So don’t let me.”

The air grows thick, like winding vines corrupting the foundation of a tree.

Levi glances between the two of them, nostrils flaring with unspoken difficulty.

Erwin is the first to nod. Wordlessly, but he does.

Hange sighs with conclusion not a second after and nods, too.

“Am I at least allowed to ask one thing?” they chirp, holding out one slender finger to the sky. “Just one teeny, tiny thing — yes or no.”

A part of him really wants to say no.

A part of him really wants to say this conversation is over before he gives them anymore concrete information about you as he navigates these uncharted waters of being a not-so-normal boyfriend to a very-normal-ass person.

He fights.

Fails.

“...fine,” he grumbles. “The fuck’s the question?”

Hange perks up, all too smug.

“Did the pop-up shop six floors up line work?”

The memory blossoms in the back of his skull.

His body warms as if trapped under an electric blanket, heat setting cranked a little too high. 

Instinctively his eyes flicker to the front door of his apartment.

Like you’ll burst in at any moment with your work bags and stress and the hope that he’ll have the same soothing balm you’ve gifted him, hands at the ready to fix your problems for you.

He hasn’t wanted much.

He’s never wanted much, but—

Shit, if he doesn’t want to be good to you.

“...something like that.”

.

Author's Note:

AHHHH HI EVERYONE! WE'RE AT IT AGAIN WITH MODERN!LEVI SHENANIGANS! How are we feeling to be back?

I seriously cannot believe we're here. I've never done a sequel before, but the demand was overwhelming and I couldn't help but agree: we could do with learning what happens after the final call.

And we will, in this seven (maybe more?) part series. I had to actually break up part one because it got way too large of a chapter, so I promise we'll be picking up right where we left off in P4 -- like, quite literally That Fateful Night in part two.

[yuri-is-online]

Out With the Old (Heartsabyul, Savanaclaw, and Octavinelle x Yuu)

"Look I would get rid of this thing if I could afford a new sweatshirt." You drag the offensive article of clothing over your head completely missing the spark of curiosity and mischief in your companion's eye. "I've got a lot of bad memories associated with this."

"If it's that uncomfortable we can go look for a replacement instead of-"

"Oh no not like that, it's super comfy. I just don't like it because it technically belongs to my ex."

notes: they/them used for Yuu, some questionable behavior from Floyd and Jade because who else? This is meant to be crack. Second part can be found here (x)

Riddle- "THAT'S LITERALLY ILLEGAL???"

He is too focused on hyperventilating because it sounds like you just admitted to a crime in front of him to even think about offering you one of his sweaters. Trey and Cater have to break it down for him unpaid therapist style that no, you are not wearing stolen property (probably), borrowing clothes is just something people in relationships often do. He then further needs it explained that no, you are not still in a relationship and since you want to get rid of the shirt it sounds like things ended poorly. His friends want to try and suggest he should give you an article of his clothing to replace the offending one but he's so focused on getting you something that matches dress code that they decide to quit while they're ahead. Literally.

Trey- "You know you can always ask us if you need help, right?"

Vil's right about Trey's tendency to fuss and spoil people being a bit of a flaw; he's in tune enough with his emotions to know that he should not, for his own sake, give you one of his old sweatshirts without being honest about why he wants you to wear it. But he can't exactly deny his instincts when it comes to the people he cares about. You're cold and uncomfortable, what sort of guy would he be if he just left you all alone? Just please don't brush this off with a comment about how much of a big brother or mother hen he is; it is already going to be pure torture trying to look at you in his things in a Queen of Hearts honoring way. He doesn't need an added complex on top of it.

Cater- "Oh honey no."

Cater doesn't like keeping stuff his exes gave him either, but luckily for him he's never been in a position where that's literally only the stuff he had on him. Speaking of things, he buys a bunch of clothes off magicam he barley has time to take the tags off of before the trend goes stale. You guys should totally ditch what you were planning to do today and have a little fashion show in his room. It'll be cute and he can get a bunch of cammable shots! Just ignore the pop music club hoodie he refuses to take back because it looks "so much cuter on you." <3

Ace- "That's extremely lame prefect."

He isn't blind; you're cute and poor. Anyone would jump at the chance to let you steal a hoodie, besides Ace isn't insecure enough to be super jealous of someone you clearly hate. He knows you well enough to tell when you are silently wishing death on someone, it's all in the vocal tone. But damn if this new bit of information doesn't make things tricky. He already makes a big fuss about not needing to focus on dating right now, and with that iconic sweatshirt of yours technically belonging to an ex it's not like he can just slide you one of his without making it super obvious what he's doing. Looks like you're just going to have to take some extra teasing for a bit prefect, it's his preferred method of cope.

Deuce- "You've been here for how long and the Headmage hasn't given you any clothes?!?!"

Deuce is a good egg whose primary concern is almost always your well being. He tends to act before his common sense and emotions can catch up with his thought process, and that's exactly what happens here. The concept of you dating someone is just so... foreign to him. Not because he thinks your undesirable! It's just that you guys are always hanging out, you not being around makes him feel a bit funny inside, and not in a good way. He doesn't mention that to his mom when he texts her asking if she has any of his old clothes laying around, but she definitely knows what's on his mind. Why else would she have sent his old delinquent jacket?

Leona- "Well that explains why it smells like shit."

Let the record show that Leona is in fact, lying to you. Your clothes don't smell like anything other than you and maybe some of the musk floating around Ramshackle Dorm, but that doesn't stop you from pulling the fabric and taking a good sniff. To Leona, all this really suggests is that you've been over the person long enough that you don't care about keeping their scent around anymore. Sure, a tiny thought does worm it's ugly way into his inferiority complex that "oh they liked someone else" but his equally large ego immediately slams the emphasis on "liked" and starts thinking about how to get his scent on you. He doesn't really own too many jackets like the one you're wearing, but he does have some nice silk scarfs he could wrap you up in. Much classier than whatever trash you had previously been going out with.

Ruggie- "You wanna toss it my way then?"

Clothes are clothes are clothes, you don't see Ruggie acting like his uniform is still Leona's just because that's who originally bought it. If you are really bothered by the memories of your ex, he's willing to listen and make fun of them, assuming that will make you feel better, but this won't make him jealous. That emotion is reserved for when you share food with other people. He is dead serious about taking the sweatshirt if you don't want it, as far as he's concerned that shirt belongs to you, and he wouldn't mind having an excuse to blend your wardrobes a little bit. It would make you even closer to being a real member of his pack.

Jack- "You can just take mine."

Jack's strong sense of justice and firm moral code are definitely his only motivations for offering you one of his sweatshirts. Forcing a student to wear clothes they find uncomfortable and associate with negative memories just because they didn't have the foresight to pack something they did like for a school they didn't know they would be attending is beyond unfair. That's what he tells himself anyway, and it's not like he isn't upset on your behalf, but it's plain as day to anyone that he wants to prove that you can rely on him; he's not like that other person, he doesn't mind being alone together with you.

Azul- "If your finances really are in such dire straights you know I could-"

Revealing personal information in Azul's presence is asking to be offered a deal. Sure that little complaint might have been insignificant to you, but for Azul? He's having a full blown Sherlock style breakdown going on in his head trying to decide what his angle is. 1) The prefect has dated in the past and doesn't look on that experience favorably. Does this prevent them from dating again? Needs further analysis. 2) Giving articles of clothing is an acceptable form of human courtship, even if used. Or is it especially if used? 3) Can he convince you to burn this if he gets you a replacement or is that too petty? 4) More importantly does this mean you have a type? And how does he press for that information without appearing desperate?

Jade- "Oh? Well that sounds extremely annoying."

Jade Leech is first and foremost a messy bitch who lives for other people's misery. Sure, he is reasonably certain he's in love with you at this point, but that doesn't matter. You have a story that's filled with second hand embarrassment and a bone to pick besides he is nothing if not an enthusiastic audience. The thought of you wearing clothes that he owns wasn't something he would have thought of himself, merfolk don't typically wear them so dating customs that involve them are a bit foreign to him. He would much rather just bite you. Or give you some jewelry. both he wants to do both

Floyd- "PUT THAT THING BACK WHERE IT CAME FROM OR SO HELP ME"

The instant you say that sweatshirt is from an ex he is taking off whatever shirt he is currently wearing and trying to tug off yours. Yes, even if it is his basketball jersey, and yes even if he just got back from practice. Isn't the scent supposed to be the point? He knows you miss him when he's gone, and he can get you something nicer out of his closet later. Just remember to tell everyone, even and especially if they don't ask, who gave it to you. Floyd's... nice? Enough? To not immediately burn your sweatshirt but it's up for debate if that's because he's actually being nice or if he just wants a trophy.

[candiid-caniine]

support needs and sex

having trouble with words recently. during this, I don't post much. have autism, have talked about it here before, but only small things.

but lots of frustration recently about representing. how people with low support needs have louder voices. people with cute, quirky autism get represented more because neurotypicals don't feel as uncomf. still they have their struggles but you know. middle to high support needs are uncomf. have to hide, have to be quiet. people with low support needs, also sometimes think *their* autism is *all* autism. don't want to talk about mid/high supports people, or be associated.

but, speech loss bad enough that I don't want to go into it today. stick to what is doable.

autistic people have sex. autistic people do kink. lot of positivity here about this. i've seen it. you've seen it. you've seen me also do it.

but autism in sex, not just:

cute stimming because sex feels good

sensory overload, in a good way

hard to speak because of good feelings

person getting flustered/shy/nervous

not only cute. not only shy. not only because of good feelings.

autism can be ugly, scary, difficult, bad communicating, hard to know how to support, getting in the way.

for me:

speech loss; not cute speech loss because of good feelings, speech loss because life is exhausting; exhausted, don't want to have sex

handling rejection poorly. have to use a lot of energy to keep from being a bad partner because of overreacting

sensory overload because good, but i dissociate because sensory overload

use sex to escape bad feelings, not in a healthy coping way

can't explain why i react poorly. in most circumstances. but also happens around sex

frustration because i can't think how to explain

meltdown because so frustrated

cycle repeats

have trouble understanding un-firm versions of "no" (have to work hard to communicate with partner, and i do, but hard work af)

have trouble understanding "maybe"

have trouble predicting how i "will/would" feel

thus frustration. meltdown. cycle resumes

or, know what i want; don't know how to explain

AND YET: i am not:

too dysfunctional for sex/relationship

"basically a child"/too immature

unsafe person

too fucked up for marriage

bad person for dating

someone who should avoid sex until burnout ends

...because i am adult. my partner is an adult. we talk about things. we know good expectations. i don't lie about can/can't do things. they don't lie about can/can't do things.

sex is only one slice of this. this blog is about sex, so i post it here. but these issues are big in my life. need support in school, in work; i seem so functional to a stranger, but only because support needs are met.

support needs met = big privilege. i acknowledge this. not so easy for many people, who seem less functional to others, only because support needs not met.

anyway. conclusion:

neurotypicals/non-autistics: don't expect sex + relationships with autistics to be like sexy imagine posts on tumblr. can be sometimes, but often not.

autistics, even: don't expect sex + relationships with other autistics to be like sex + relationships for you.

low support needs autistics: you guys have a problem. (maybe technically i am you guys, don't really know, so maybe *we* have a problem.) some of you don't like when autism represented as mid-high support. don't like to think you're like us. not cool. either way stop speaking like *your* autism is *all* autism. if you have energy + time + emotional resource to do so, tell off other low support needs when they act like this.

high/mid support needs: i see you. you belong. you deserve healthy, good sex if you are adult. support needs =/= being unworthy/not well enough/not functional enough for relationship. possible to have relationships that work for you, allow for the kind of support you need, from other person/medical team/support system. don't mask to get through relationship. hurts you, you should be loved for who you are.

[atlafan]

“You’re acting like that meme of Jamie Lee Curtis where she’s aggressively drinking that water and telling someone off at the same time.” Layna groaned at her boyfriend who finally stopped glaring at his phone to look up at her.

“I have absolutely no idea what that is.”

“Yes you do, I’ve sent it to you before!” Layna takes her own phone out and shows him after searching it quickly on Google.

“Ohhhhh.” He smirks. “Right, now I remember. It’s usually you who looks like that when you’re about to brawl with someone.”

“Now that you’ve calmed down, can we think about what just happened rationally?”

“No, and I will try to call customer service again.” He holds his phone up to his ear.

“Your ass is not on the phone!”

“I’m listening to a voicemail!”

“Okay, Mr. Corporate.” She rolls her eyes.

“Just because I was promoted at the gym, does not make me a corporate meow meow asshole. I think it’s perfectly reasonable for to be upset about this.”

“I’m just going to go in and see if we can book a new reservation with my credit card. The room is technically available..”

“Not until I get to the bottom of this.”

“There’s nothing to get to the bottom of.” She groaned.

“The bottom is gaping. This is a job for the FBI.”

“Who are you, Kris Jenner?”

“Ew, no.” He grimaces. “She’s insane, why would you say that?”

“Because you just said…ugh! Why can’t you know the same references that I do?”

“I’m so sorry that I haven’t spent hours upon hours watching E! I’ll try to rectify that at some point. Now, let me do what I need to do.” He taps a few things on his phone and then presses it to his ear. “This is why I hate credit cards, cash is so much easier.”

Layna pinched the bridge of her nose and sighed. She reached into his pocket for the paper confirmation Harry had brought with them so they could check into their hotel with ease. He has wanted to plan a long weekend for them, so he booked everything with his name and his credit cards. When you check into a hotel, you need to show the card you used to reserve the room. The woman said the cards didn’t match. When Harry tried again, the app for his card put a lock on his account. So now they’re out on the curb trying to figure it out.

As Layna scans the paper she furrows her brows, then reaches into Harry’s pocket again for his wallet. He pays her no mind while he speaks with another representative from the card’s customer service line. She takes out the credit card he used to reserve the booking and realizes that Harry inverted the expiration date, and wrote Harry Edwerd Styles, instead of Harry Edward Styles. Two simple mistakes that the woman behind the counter could have been nicer about helping with instead of just turning them away.

“Harry…hang up the phone, baby. I figured out what happened.”

“Yeah?” He hangs up the phone. He was on hold so who cares?

“Um…I don’t want you to feel embarrassed because I’ve made mistakes like this before too, but it appears that you inverted the expiration date on your card…and spelled your middle name wrong…”

“I did?!” He snatches the card and the paper and scans them both. “I’m not seeing it.”

“Can I point to them?” She asks gently and he nods. She shows him the expiration on the card and then points to what’s on the paper. “See, the expiration is 06/29, you put 09/26…and you spelled Edward with two E’s…”

“Oh.” His cheeks redden, obviously very embarrassed by his blunder. “I should have had you look at it before I submitted…”

“It happens! I’ve done with my security code and my exportation date before. I think if we go back in, we could explain it better. And then see if that snotty lady will be cooler about the mistake.”

“This is so embarrassing.” He groans.

“I know it feels that way right now, but I promise, I’m not judging. I know your dyslexia flares up more when you’re stressed and reading all the fine print for a hotel reservation can be really daunting.” She wraps her arms around his neck and pecks his nose. “The sooner we go inside and fix the reservation, the sooner we can go to our room and I can help you forget alllll about this.”

“Might have times where I think of it randomly and I feel embarrassed all over again.” He grips her hips, squeezing them.

“Then I guess wherever we are you’ll just need to pull me aside and use me until you forget again.”

No Complaints Blurb

[jusiri]

So the Eastern Roman Empire IS mentioned in the books actually, as well as the fact that rest of Rome is in a decline during the events of the books

and theres a bit in book 4, at the bottom/side of the page that tells us how long ago this all took place

And at the Time of Publishing that would have put the date at 507 AD....

Which is Still AFTER the Fall of Rome in our world, but way earlier than the dates in the Library Book

Now, the book page doesn't say when the books were checked out, just 'Return on or Before' the printed date

Technically speaking, the meathead public library could have, knowing how Most Vikings are, they could just have a really really really long check out time

Like

Hundreds of years

Which imo, would be kinda hilarious

BUT if the Books take place that early, the end of the Viking Age would be in like 600 AD

Ya know, about, oh..... 4 and a half centuries before it ended here

So did the Romans last longer and the Vikings last way shorter?

Who knows, certainly not us, and probably not even Cressida but at least it gives us much to think about

HTTYD books iceberg:

Feel free to correct me and suggest changes and additions!

[armpirate]

Soundleasure | Choi San || CH. 22

Pairings: Soft!San x fem!reader || Strangers to lovers, fake dating

Genre: smut, angst, fluff, online sex, ghosting

Warnings: inexperienced!San, fem!reader, masturbation, online sex, camboy, first times.

Summary: You can do whatever you please and be whoever you want on the Internet. And San knew that a little bit too well.

After finally following all the signs the universe was throwing at him, he started living a double life that no one was aware of. Everyone in his daily life knew him as Choi San, the reserved and quiet boy who wouldn't raise his voice, and would barely communicate with anyone outside of his comfort group. But only a few knew him as Soundleasure, the man with a sexy voice and a filthy mind that had their toes curling just with his narrations.

He never thought of the possibility of those two lives ever meeting, he had always tried for them to follow a parallel route and had always played safe to keep his friends from ever suspecting that side even existed. But his plans will start to crumble when he gets a little too close with one of his subscribers and she invades his real-self and altergo's universes without being able to stop it.

Y/n will not only help him to keep his secret from his circle, but will also show him there's more of Soundleasure in him than he'd like to admit. 

Previous || Next

MASTERLIST

Aprox. time of reading: 23 minutes

Chapter warnings: Smut, inexperienced!San, oral sex (female receiving), male masturbation, dirty talk

San looked for any chance he could use to catch both Mingi or Wooyoung by themselves to have that conversation he didn't really want to have, but needed to. But every time he had the chance, either because one of them was out meeting up with friends, or working, San took a few steps back and ate those words before they were able to form in his throat.

First it was Mingi. He was all alone watching TV, with his feet resting on the coffee table -after he had told him several times not to place them there. The remote was resting against his lips while he held it from the bottom, concentrating on how pencils were made. Before speaking up, San tried to plan what he was going to say, and how he was going to say it so his friend would take it as a serious topic, and not as a joke.

—Can I speak to you about something?

—Sure —he answered, without moving his eyes from the TV—. If it's about the leftovers in the fridge, I can still eat it. So I'll eat it soon, just have patience.

—It's not about that —San assured him—. It's something else.

—Oh —his attention quickly shifted to San—, what is it, then?

How could he even form that question?

—Let's imagine you've never cooked in your life, right? And a friend comes and joins you in the kitchen —he tried to explain—. This friend is really good at cooking, so it adds a lot of pressure, right? A lot of pressure... —he continued— You don't want to make a mess, but you also don't want to sit and watch how the other cooks, because you want the other to enjoy food to the same level you will enjoy it.

Mingi's glare was blank for a whole minute, with his eyebrows shortly furrowing at the edges, before his mouth opened wide. At first, San thought that his friend got the memo of what he was trying to ask, but it only took him to speak to let him know he didn't catch a single hint.

—Is this about Wooyoung? Did he complain because I don't cook? —Mingi quickly reacted— I cooked three days ago. It was your turn, and today he had to cook. But we ordered something instead. So, technically, he's the one that should cook tomorrow. He always does the same thing.

Before San could even deny his assumptions, Mingi stood up from his place, placing the remote roughly on the coffee table to walk to his room and close the door behind him.

He sat there, staring at the white door that had just been closed in front of him, regretting the moment he decided to come up with that example. He should've gone straight to the point...

His head was thrown back, and his sigh was heavy when he had a headache looking for Wooyoung in his chats, just to notice a strange person called "Pocketful of Sunshine" right under Y/n's chat. He needed to stop doing that.

San: Where are you?

San: and for the record, stop changing your name on my phone

It took Wooyoung just two minutes to reply to his text with a kissy emoji; he loved using those whenever he had the chance.

Wooyoung: I'm at the cafe near my building

Wooyoung: You know that one with the disgusting coffee?

San flinched just at the reminisce of the taste. It was indeed disgusting, so he just couldn't understand why Wooyoung kept going there.

Wooyoung: There is a cute boy

Wooyoung: I'm three americanos away from getting his number

Wooyoung: What do you want?

San: Nothing, it's alright

Was his issue as urgent for him to show up where he was?

He had been able to wait for a few days, while he fought all his insecurities and tried to come up with the best way to introduce the issue. Only for it to fail as soon as he opened his mouth. It wasn't urgent, but he was sure he wanted to have it all sorted out next time he saw Y/n. The last few days they had been texting, with their flirting getting over the roof, and only stopping at the highest level because Y/n was still on her period. And they hadn't been able to meet up because she was busy with work, although they both still made up time to see each other if it was only for a few minutes.

One kiss, and he was completely served for the rest of the week. Yet, at the same time, her lips were so addictive that he couldn't stop coming up with excuses to meet her up with the badge she prepared for him. And Y/n also escaped a few times to his college just to have lunch or breakfast with him.

He wanted the next time they had a proper alone time, it was mind-blowing for her. Everything he couldn't do the last time.

He didn't know when it was going to be the last time he was going to be able to meet either Mingi or Wooyoung alone, without both of them being stuck with one another like they usually were. He just couldn't miss that chance.

He probably would have enough with fifteen minutes.

Wooyoung's workplace wasn't far from the apartment they all shared, which was one of the main reasons they chose that place. He was the first one to graduate and find a stable job, so he was the one who had bigger priority when choosing where to live.

When he crossed the corner to the establishment, able to peek through the glass, he could spot his friend smirking at, probably, the boy he was talking about in his texts. His smile was wide, and his hand waved in the air, making it clear he was there in case his friend hadn't been aware of him -which was difficult, his friend's style always made him stand out among the crowd.

—San? —Wooyoung asked with a smile— What are you doing here?

—I need to speak to you, and it'll be quick. I promise —he assured him, taking the free spot in front of him—. It's about Y/n.

—What did you do now?

—That's exactly the problem: what I don't do —San tried to start—. In my head, it all plays out perfectly, but once I have to take it to action, I turn clumsy, and stupid, and useless.

—Well, I think Y/n is accepting you with all your flaws. That girl is so into you, she doesn't care about how indecisive you are —Wooyoung shrugged—. It's like when you acted as if kissing her was something bad.

—Okay, but this problem is bigger. I mean... —his tongue clicked while he tried to think— I don't want to disappoint her. She's so perfect, and so amazing... I don't want her to be forced to go at my pace always. I want to be able to adapt to hers as well.

Wooyoung's face distorted with every word his friend said, trying to understand what he exactly meant by speeding up things in their relationship.

—San, isn't it a bit early? I doubt she's thinking about that.

—I know, but I'm sure she'll start thinking about it soon, to take the next step —he assured him—. And I want to know how to do things when it's time.

—Dude, it's impossible to know how to do things, it's even difficult to know when it's time. It's something you'll know only when you do it.

—I know, but I want to be ready when the time comes, you know? —he tried to explain— I want her to feel like she's with a man, and not with a boy she needs to guide by hand on everything he does.

—I understand —Wooyoung lied—. But marriage is one hell of a serious thing, and you have been dating not even for two months.

—Marriage? Wait.

—And I doubt Y/n is thinking about marriage —Wooyoung continued—. I know you're a romantic and such, but if you go to her with this, she'll run away. And I won't be able to defend you, because she'll be right.

—Wooyoung...

—I get you're in love, but isn't it a bit too early to think about that as something more than just a fantasy? San, dude, relax. It'll come...

—It's not about marriage, it's about sex, you dumbass —San interrupted him—. What, of everything I said, made you link it with marriage, huh? And it's not that I don't want to marry her, I don't know. I certainly don't see myself with anyone else that isn't her, but marriage isn't in my head at the moment.

—San —Wooyoung tried to interrupt him, when he saw the way his rant kept escalating.

—I have several problems, like not being able to satisfy her because I just don't know how to do it out of the theory —Wooyoung's expression changed, but San was so deep in the rant that he was unaware—. I haven't had a single experience in sex, not one. And she deserves me being at her level, but I don't know how to.

—Why don't you ask her?

Wooyoung's interruption made San's head tilt, while one of the corners of his lip lifted in confusion with the comment. His friend shyly point behind him, and that was when he knew he fucked it up big time.

Y/n had her eyebrows slightly raised, her lips were softly pressed, making obvious the smile she was holding back. When he looked back at the table, he could finally spot the second drink near the fall empty americano glass, which still had a bit of coffee in it.

—Why didn't you tell me she was here?

—I did —Wooyoung assured him.

When he lifted the phone, he could see the two messages in the middle of his explanation of why he was at that cafe.

Wooyoung: Also, I'm with Y/n!! We're working on the event she told me about.

His blood didn't abandon his system because it couldn't, but he could feel liters and liters of it falling to his feet when he realized it did show up on his phone, too. He was just too rushed to talk with him that he completely omitted the most important ones.

—I can explain this —San turned to Y/n.

—Well, I'm done. So I'll just leave you two alone —Wooyounng informed them, getting up from his seat while still looking at his phone—. By the way, do you know why Mingi is telling me to cook tomorrow?

San was about to speak, but his brain was too exhausted and concerned at the problem that was coming his way, rather than the little bickering he had caused. Instead of insisting, Wooyoung hugged Y/n, walking in the same direction San came in to leave.

—Let's go —Y/n whispered, securing the trap of her bag on her shoulder.

She paid for her coffee, and didn't say a single word until they got in her car. That silence was making him feel like he did something wrong, even if her hand reached to his forearm to give him a soft touch while she drove. Her car didn't even enter the street to his building, it didn't get close, which was the first thing that surprised him. He expected her to drop him off, after having a serious chat in her car. Instead, Y/n drove to her apartment, guiding him to a place where he knew how to go to already.

Far from being annoyed, she felt upset. Not because he reached his friends for advice, but because he didn't reach for her when it was something that involved her. At the same time, she understood his position and why he didn't feel like discussing it with her that way. He kept adding pressure on himself, a pressure that he didn't need to suffer. San didn't need to be so demanding with himself to impress her, because he already did every day.

—I'm sorry about earlier —he finally spoke.

—What are you sorry about? —she asked, resting her lower back on the backrest of her couch.

—About talking about that with Wooyoung.

—San, you don't need to apologize for that. He's your best friend, and it's obvious you'll go to him or any of the boys when you need advice —she tried to explain—. You weren't being disrespectful, you didn't have ill intentions with that. And I appreciate what you wanted to do, but I'm here to work with you on whatever you need —the folds of her shirt got deeper when her arms crossed over her chest.

His hands poked inside the pockets of his trousers, while hesitated to walk down the two steps to her living room and be closer to her.

—I just don't want you to think you have to be guiding me all the time.

—But if you don't know, who's supposed to guide you? I won't like you any less because you don't know when it's the time to hold my hand, or to touch me unprovoked. And even less because you don't know how to twirl your tongue or move your hips. You have much more to offer than just that —his eyes shined at that sentence—. What scares you so much?

—The other day, you didn't even think of the possibility of me returning you the favor, and I thought that maybe it was because you didn't want to waste time teaching me. I don't want to disappoint you.

—The other day I was on my period. Even if you had known how to do it, I wouldn't have liked you going down because I wouldn't be comfortable. I already explained to you how sex works, how it should work between us. And, honestly, I want to teach you. How many women can say they have a man willing to learn and follow all of their instructions to please them? —she chuckled, trying to break the tension between them.

San stepped in her direction when her arms were lifted up in the air, open and welcoming for him.

—I don't want you to go at my pace —she reminded his words the previous week—. With pressure... it isn't the way to do things, because you won't be comfortable. You won't disappoint me because you aren't ready, or because you don't do things right at first. But I need you to speak to me first —her fingerprints played with the edges of his black t-shirt—. Before you reach conclusions or stress out, let me try to calm you down.

It made no sense to get mad at him for his doubts and insecurities. She had been there, she had lived all those doubts and feelings with her first boyfriend. The only thing she could do to help him was add all her learned lessons, so he wouldn't be going through all those bad experiences. If she could avoid it, she wanted San to avoid the pain and negative feelings that went along with inexperience and a bad partner.

Her hands pulled him closer for a hug, hiding her head in his chest, while his arms wrapped around her body.

—Alright —he nodded, finally feeling how his heart went back to a normal speed in his chest—. I do want to do it though. I want to taste you on my tongue, feel the way your thighs tremble around my head, I want to pleasure you so good that you'd stick me against you so I can't move away...

His voice sounded deep against her ear, with a suggestive tone that almost made her knees go weak just by hearing it alone. She got so used to see him in his sweet and gentle persona that she entirely forgot he was Soundleasure, the same man that had her back arching and her core aching just with his voice.

The pumping of her heart was so hard after that that San was able to feel it trying to escape through his rib cage.

Y/n barely had to stand on her tiptoes to reach his lips, due to the heels she was already wearing, to trap his lower lip in between her teeth, pulling from it gently, careful not to hurt him. Before she could move back, desperation got the best of him, trapping her neck in his fingers to pull her back for a kiss.

Leadership took over him, because San knew that was the only part he could lead her in before he started looking like a lost puppy. His hands moved to her waist, pushing her closer and involuntarily forcing her arms up around his neck. While her tongue tried to follow the spirals he was creating, her hands moved down to his wrists. His fingerprints went from touching the thin fabric of her white blouse to the rough leather of her belt until he was tracing the curve to her ass. Her arms were once again wrapped around his neck when San dented his fingers on her skin over her linen pants.

With the intensity his head turned and how hard she sucked on his lips and his tongue, his fingers squeezed tighter her skin, pushing her closer -if that was even possible at that point- and forcing her to stand on her tiptoes to keep up with the kiss.

His lips left her hanging for another kiss, moving down her neck with no previous warning. His pecks were flirty, insecure, trying to test that new territory before he tried to mirror what he had seen in videos, and what Y/n had done to him before. The way his lips enclosed around a bit of skin, pinching it lightly with his teeth, made her breathe deeply, instantly moving her hands to place them on his shoulder and his nape. Just the feel of her fingertips playing with the hair on the back of his head created a friction in his brain that pushed him to suck harder on the skin down her jaw.

—Let's go to my room —she suggested, almost choking on air.

Y/n took the brief moment he tried to process her words to hold his hand, leading him upstairs to the upper part of her penthouse.

Anxiety started to build up as they took the last step that led to her room, lighted by the sunlight that was becoming weaker, with more golden tones, with each passing minute. Words got stuck in his throat when she turned to him with a smile.

—What should I do? I should undress you, right?

She was endeared by how shy he looked all of a sudden, giving him a soft peck on the lips to try to relax him.

—Why don't we do something else? You undress yourself, and I undress myself —she suggested—. At least until we're both on our underwear, hmm?

San nodded, just getting glimpses of how she looked completely naked. Although it was obvious the camera of her phone, or her laptop, did her no justice. With every portion of skin that was shown, every button being unbuttoned, every fabric waving on her skin to travel through her body to reach the floor, with every corner exposed to him, he was convinced she was even more perfect in real life.

It took her the last fabric to reach the floor to advance in his direction, cupping his cheek to kiss him slowly, trying to drink up every bit of insecurity so San wouldn't hesitate on trying anything he wanted with her.

His body moved with hers, advancing towards the bed even if he didn't see a thing, only leaving her body to extend his arm towards the mattress, while the other held her by the nape so she'd fall over it carefully.

The first groan found its way through his throat when he felt the warmth of her core against his growing bulge, at the same time her heels caressed the back of his thighs.

—Why don't you take off the rest? And don't hold back. I'll stop you if I don't like something.

It was his time to put his brain to work, getting back all the imagination he was tired of using for his videos, letting Soundleasure kick in and possess him when he needed it the most.

His lips created an invisible trail of kisses from her lips to her cleavage, instantly having her back arching up in response. He was gentle, soft, which created a huge contrast with the type of contact she'd had with other men. The delicacy made her skin burn with every rub, with every centimeter his breath coated.

Just like he did with her neck, his lips sucked on the curve of her breast, while his fingers struggled to find the clasp of her white bra. Her giggle resonated through his lips, while she moved under him to take it off.

The vision, her perky nipples pointing up, sent a straight message to his dick, feeling it twitch inside his boxers before he was encouraged to keep on moving with her kind gaze.

—What? —she smiled, siding her head to be able to look at him better.

—You're so beautiful —he assured, completely mesmerized by the shine in her eyes.

San didn't know what to do next, but he was sure he didn't want her to be bored of him. So, instead of just kissing her body, his flat tongue moved up from her belly button to the space in between her breasts, getting her body to squirm underneath him. But he stopped right where he was supposed to go on, moving his hands in the air, moving his head back and forth as he indecisively tried to get to the way to pleasure her.

Y/n didn't say a word. Her hand reached his, moving it up the curve of her waist until it reached her breast. She guided him to gently massage her breasts, feeling another throb at his dick when her hard nipple pushed against his palm.

Her legs attempted to close when his warm mouth closed around her hard nipple, feeling all the hairs in her body rise at the unconscious contact of his tongue against the button.

—Do that again —she asked—. Use your tongue while you suck it.

A moan burned her throat, coming out as a hum through her closed lips when his slippy tongue started twirling around her nipple while his mouth sucked on it.

She didn't need to tell him, she didn't need to guide him. Theory started working as it should, guiding him while she was slowly melting with his tongue. While his mouth trapped and teased the wet nipple, his thumb and index rubbed and gently pinched the other one, exchanging the buttons just like he had read the main characters of many spicy books doing. And he was glad he did, after her first moan worked as a necessary rub on his ego.

The thin coat of spit on her nipples made them shine under the sunlight, building up a feeling of possession he had never felt before.

Before she could even tell him to go lower on her, he moved. Still spreading kisses all over every bit of skin he came across, hooking his fingers on the elastic of her white panties to slip them down her legs, and almost going dizzy by the subtle smell of arousal coming from her core.

San tried to concentrate on anything else that wasn't how he could clearly see the juices leaking out of her and covering her folds, and how it was all because of him. And Y/n appeased him by placing a hand on his shoulder when his body was unconsciously moving forward.

—Don't go straight at it —she mentioned, supporting the weight of her body on her shoulder so she'd be able to cup his chin with two of her fingers—. Take a while to reach there, kiss my legs, the surroundings... and then, do your magic.

San smirked at her indications, doing exactly what he was told, and adding up eye contact. His eyes looked shy in contradiction of their fierce look, while his lips moved down her inner thigh. Her fingers lightly pulled from the sheets when his lips entered in contact with her labia, coating her crotch with his warm breath as he built her up for the moment.

—Now... —she tried to focus— take a taste. Move your tongue slowly, change it from flat to just using the tip, and don't be shy. And don't focus on the clit, we'll get there later.

Her head instantly threw back when San groaned against her core at the metallic flavor coming out of her, first moving his flat tongue over her slit. She had never felt as exposed as that day, when he parted her folds with two of his fingers, but she loved every bit of it. His licks were short and gentle, focusing on small areas, slowly diving into her entrance but moving up before he could even enter.

—You taste so good —he assured her, holding her knees up to place her thighs on his shoulder.

—Like you imagined?

—Better.

Her smile dropped when San did exactly what she wanted him to do, before she could say it out loud.

Two of his fingers parted her folds, exposing the hood of her clit, so he could push it with his tongue back and forwards. Those movements kept changing from being from side to side to spirals that went from the outside to the inside.

Despite pleasure blinding her, she could still see the way his hips kept humping against her mattress while he found the best way to move her tongue, guided by her gasps and sighs.

—Are you hard? —she struggled to ask with a shaky voice.

—Yeah, but that's not important now.

—Take off your boxers.

—Y/n, I'll deal with it on my own.

—And that's what you're going to do —his eyebrows digged deep in his nose—. Touch yourself while you eat me out.

She tried to control her mouth from salivating when his dick jumped free the moment he moved down his boxers, remembering how good it felt each vein against her tongue, but still respecting his choice of him being the one pleasuring her for the other day.

—Now suck on my clit, doing something similar to what you did on my nipples —she guided him.

She furrowed when he barely gave her time to finish the sentence, before his head was deeply buried in her core, with his lips enclosed around her swollen clit. She wasn't able to control her body after he got on it, moving her fingers through the locks of his hair to motivate him to go on.

And it worked, it felt like an energy boost for him, moving his tongue and his head as if his life depended on how tight her fingers pulled from his hair. Each moan she let out had his dick throbbing and twitching underneath his ecstatic fingers, finding himself thrusting against them unconsciously.

—Please, don't stop —she begged, throwing her head back—. You're doing so good. Please.

That sentence alone had his hand moving in sync with the speed of his tongue, losing the last bits of sanity he had left in his system.

He shouldn't have looked up, because there wasn't anything as sexy and breathtaking as Y/n's being perked up with her back arched up, while her lips were parted to control her shaky and unstable breathing.

All the times he had seen her in that state through a camera, and never it felt that good.

—Make me cum —she cried, thrusting her hips against his tongue to press tighter on his tongue—. Please, make me cum —she moaned again—. San.

The desperation that tinted each one of her words had him twitching and throbbing, losing the rhythm of the movements in his hand, and pausing the ones of his tongue when he couldn't control some of the low moans.

Y/n could feel the vibrations of his own release on his tongue, while he hardly tried to keep up the circles and infinite shapes so she couldn't see her journey to her high paused. And that dedication, that desperation to get her to orgasm while he was struggling with the consequences of his own high, were the little she needed to let herself go as well and ride with him through their respective highs.

Her body was tense for a quick second, only to relax right after, almost feeling like it was mixing with the blankets under her body.

San was satisfied while he looked at her, proud to be the owner of the thin coat of sweat on the valley of her breasts, or the subtle blush on her cheeks. It felt like the biggest privilege he had acquired in his twenty six years alive.

—How was it? —he dared to ask.

—If you're already like this —she took a moment to earn some oxygen back—, I'm afraid of what it'll be like with more experience.

His dimpled deepened in his cheeks when his smile turned wider, trying to hide it behind the thigh that still was on his shoulder.

—You were right, by the way —he added, moving his head again to look at her—: our moans sound really good together —it was topped by a gentle kiss on the knee.

San attempted to move up to hug her, but it was then when he noticed the result of his orgasm on the spot where he was. He froze on the spot, pretending to be hugging her thigh so she wouldn't feel suspicious of it.

—Are you going to stay there? —she giggled.

—It feels good —it wasn't a lie, but it wasn't the place he wanted to be at.

—We should clean ourselves.

—You go first —San tried to convince her to go first, so she wouldn't see the mess he made on her blankets.

—Alright —she finally gave in—, but next time you're coming with me.

She felt weirded out when he only moved his head up when she bent to kiss him, but still shrugged it off before walking to her bathroom.

San urgently jumped from the bed as soon as she closed the door, trying to look around for something he could clean the stain with. At least to make it less obvious and dirty.

No papers were on sight, no napkins either, and he obviously wasn't going to use her clothes to clean it up. He picked up his boxers from the floor and cleaned it all, although he only found himself cursing at how the stain kept spreading a bit more.

—I bought you a toothbrush in case you wanted to...

He panicked when he heard her voice so clear, throwing his underwear away, but failing at pointing where to throw them.

—Tell me you weren't doing what I think you were doing —she started, looking up to him.

—I made a bit of a mess when I came —he tried to explain—, and I don't know... I didn't want you to be disgusted.

—Considering we've fantasized about you cumming all over my face, it's a bit difficult to be disgusted over something natural like that —she walked towards him—. And did you seriously use your underwear to clean it up?

—Yeah... I clearly didn't think it through —his lips were pressed together, almost disappearing, while her hands found a place on his waist.

—I was planning on watching a movie, but making the bed and doing the laundry sound way more original —she joked—. Although I don't have boxers, do you think one of my panties will do the work?

—Do we have to get dressed though?

—Oh, look how fast you learn —she mumbled when his lips rubbed against hers—. But don't act like you won't get shy and try to cover yourself every five minutes.

—Yeah, you're right —he scoffed—. I won't wear any underwear. It'll be for a moment, so it won't be a big deal.

—Okay —she nodded—. Before you show off your housewife skills, let's go clean up.

San couldn't understand how he was still afraid of her judging him or running away, when she had shown to be understandable and patient with him. He could only guess that was the exact same reason that scared him: losing someone who had been exactly what he had been waiting for. 

[yanderepuck]

Ikevamp au where everything is the same except the suitor falls in love with you, but you hate them.

Imagine. An otome game, but you constantly turn down the guy.

Napoleons route: what makes you think I want to be your body guard?

You: what makes you think I want to be near a panty sniffer?

Napoleons route later: wait... I think I'm in love with her

You: why won't he leave me alone.

Wait why is this actually hilarious

Mozart's route: no one likes you and no one wants you here.

You: what makes you think I want to spend my time with a man who meowed at people?

Mozart's route later: so I actually really like your company

You: I've never enjoyed being around you for a moment after you called me a nuisance.

How would you expect me to fall in love with either of these two after they both tell me they want nothing to do with me. Please explain

Leonardo's route: I'm going to drag you around the city and have you help me with things

You: please just let me be depressed in the mansion

Leonardo's route later: I've really been enjoying our time together

You: please just let me be depressed in the mansion.

Just let her do her thing. She wants to go back home with no strings attached. Make sure she doesn't try to kill herself but please don't drag her along against her will.

Arthur's route: you're a pretty little thing

You: touch me and I will scream and bite you myself. Never speak to me. Don't even perceive me.

Arthur's route later: so it all started when I was a wee lad

You: didn't I tell you to stop acknowledging me? I'm not interested in your trauma. I didn't even know who wrote Sherlock until I got here

Let be real. Most of us didn't actually know. We knew Sherlock didn't write Sherlock but we didn't know it was some crazy fairy man.

Vincent's route: you're really sweet and I think we should be friends

You: yes. Friends is nice. You seem very nice

Vincent's route later: so..I..um...I want to be more than friends.

You: learn how to have a negative emotion and stop acting like being sad is a bad thing.

The boy is honestly toxic. He's going to invalidate your negative emotions I feel it.

Theo's route: hondje! You saw my scar and so now you're going to work for me!

You: shouldn't I be the one trying to blackmail you??

Theo's route later: you're actually a really good worker and have a good eye for art. I like you hondje

You: so you like capitalism? Am I even getting paid? I didn't travel through a door just to run around the city and sell art work

I'll never understand how it makes sense that Theo thinks he can make her do things bc he assumes she noticed some random ass scar. WHAT'S WRONG WITH EVERYTHING LEARNING YOU GOT SHOT. YOU DIDN'T COME FROM THE FUTURE. THEY CAN TECHNICALLY LOOK UP HOW YOU DIED.

Why did I have a hard time coming up with one for Isaac. Ik that boy is problematic but why am I having issues

Isaac's route: HOW DONT YOU KNOW ABOUT *insert very complicated scientific theory*

You: I went to public school my dude. Mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell

Isaac's route later: she's very kind and patient. Is this what love feels like??

You: IF HE COULD SHUT UP ABOUT HIS WORK FOR 5 SECONDS THAT WOULD BE GREAT

I know once I post this I'll think of a better one for Isaac. But oh well. Boy needs to let you talk about your day.

Dazai's route: you're so cute. I'm going to adopt you as my little sister

You: you're a little weird... But I guess this is okay

Dazai's route later: so I really like you, but I need to push you away and act like I don't care because it's what's best

You: I have been here for two weeks and you've tried to kill yourself 4 times. How did you think I could mentally handle that let alone want to date you, PLUS YOU KEEP CALLING ME YOUR LITTLE SISTER

He sibling zones you up until the very end. What kind of Alabama kink do you got going on, Dazai

Jean's route: I'm not sorry that I bit you. Don't talk to me, I don't want friends. No one understands me anyway.

You: if Comte doesn't beat your ass for biting me then I'll do it myself.

Jean's route later: I think I'm learning what love is. She's helped me with so much and I want to repay her

You: he bit me and never apologized or got in trouble. Why the hell would I ever be interested in him. He's treating life like a SURVIVAL GAME

I have many complaints about Jean. But my main one is the biting and him never getting in trouble for it bc he's the favorite child.

Will's route: you found and read my note book and now I have to keep an eye on you so you don't tell anyone that I'm using this information against them to possibly get them killed!

You: sooo...you aren't writing all of this because you have bad social skills and are just trying to better understand everyone because they are all from a vastly different time period than you? Thanks for telling me your plan.

Will's route later: so I've realized the error of my ways and I'm not going to do the deed any more and I hope you can forgive me

You: LET ME OUT OF THIS DAMN VILLA

Will became a little too obsessed. Oops

Comte's route: it is my fault that you are here, so I will protect you and take care of all your needs while you are here. You'll be the daughter I never had

You: thanks! I'll work around the mansion to pass the time and get to know everyone better

Comte's route later: I know I have pushed you away multiple times but I really love you and I want to spend centuries with you

You: I have seen how bad of a parent you are and I've picked up your dirty clothes off the floor I don't think this is going to work

Comte just keeps daughter zoning you and then is like "so I love you" IS THIS WHERE DAZAI GETS IT FROM.

Sebastian's route: every time you do something wrong I'm going to flick your forehead

You: do that one more time and I swear to God I'm slapping that grin off your face

Sebastian's route later: being with you is making me miss home and consider going back to our time. I would love to go back with you and spend our lives together back in Japan

You: there's so many reasons why this wouldn't work out and staying at the top: YOU TOOK SOME RANDOM PILLS SOME PRIEST GAVE YOU. Not to mention you didn't tell ANYONE you were dying

If you're gonna fall in love with me at least tell me you're going to die in a few months.

Also not going to do the trio in this moment. Oops sorry

[iamvegorott]

Magicians Don't Need Superheros Pt36

First: Link Prev: Link Next: Link

----------

Jackie sat on the edge of his bed, head in his hands and staring at the ground. He was so exhausted in more ways than he thought was possible. After Mad went home, despite Anti’s claims of wanting his ‘emotional support nerd’ to stay, they decided to eat some food. Robbie joined them, so Jackie didn’t talk about what had happened until after he ran off to play. Robbie would get the explanation when he changed to an older age, permission already given to Chase to fill him in later. 

It was a long and awkward talk. They all had been in the living room and staring at Jackie as he explained what those doctors did to him. A strange numbness took over and allowed Jackie to speak freely, albeit in a monotone voice that no one liked. Jackie thought he’d feel relief, the whole ‘weight off his shoulders’ thing, but instead, he just felt so…empty. 

Jackie had also insisted on Chase and Henrik going out on their dinner date, not wanting to ruin their plans because Dark ended up yanking some sour stuff to the surface. It had been nice spending the day with the others, mainly just lounging about and watching a few movies together. Jackie had called it an early night because he thought he would fall right to sleep with how tired he felt, but after getting changed, he just found himself in a daze for the past few hours. Maybe he needed to walk around or something.

Jackie sighed as he stood up and left his room. He paused as he looked at Marvin’s bedroom door. He was tempted to knock on it, ask Marvin what he was doing, and watch some TV with him until he could finally sleep… they’d done that plenty of times for each other, but the thought of doing that now felt so weird after his whole crisis he still hadn’t figured out. 

Chase should be back home by now, and he could sit with him. Jackie chewed the inside of his cheek as he walked down the hall, passing Robbie’s door and hearing some giggles as he turned the corner. 

“Two glasses of wine, and you become a mess.” Henrik teased in a whisper as he and Chase leaned against each other, walking through the other end of the hall and stopping in front of Chase’s door. 

“Coming from the man that had three.” Chase teased back. 

“It was good wine.” Henrik quickly protested.

“And I can’t help but laugh at how it feels like we’re teenagers sneaking back home after staying out too late with how quiet you’re making us be.” Chase chuckled. 

“Have we ever technically been teenagers? Aside from Robert, I do not think-” Henrik got stopped by Chase kissing him. “You could have just told me to stop.” He said with a big grin.

“Can’t think straight, too much wine.” Chase hummed with his own little smirk. 

“Well, I will help keep you from thinking for the rest of the night.” Henrik opened the door and pulled Chase into the room by the front of his shirt. 

“Oh, gross,” Jackie said to himself, faking a gag and wishing he hadn’t just witnessed that. He turned back around, thinking that maybe if he just buried himself in his bed, he’d eventually pass out. 

“Jackie?” Marvin’s voice got Jackie to look up, seeing that he had just stepped out of his room. “Can’t sleep either? I was going to make some tea. Would you like me to make some for you as well?” He gave Jackie a soft smile. Jackie craved the normalcy they had before he started making everything weird. 

“Yeah…would you mind making that one really fruity one? With the mango stuff?” 

“Of course.” Marvin chuckled, waiting until Jackie started walking before following suit.

“We might want to make the stuff quickly and get back to the rooms,” Jackie warned.

“Why’s that?” 

“We have both been traumatized by seeing Chase and Henrik together.” 

“You saw ass?”

“No.”

“Then we’re not on even ground.” Marvin did end up walking a little faster past Chase and Henrik’s rooms. 

“I can handle us not being even if it means I never see Henrik’s ass.” Jackie chuckled, leaning back against the counter while Marvin got to work making their drinks. 

“Hopefully, they’ve learned their lesson, and there’s no more office incidents.” Marvin clicked his tongue. “I can only handle so much naked man in one day.” He added with a little gesture at Jackie before stepping side to get the flavored syrups. 

Jackie looked down at himself, and it reminded him that he was shirtless. He had always been comfortable being shirtless around Marvin. This was just how he slept, so he didn’t think much about it. Was it too much? No one else batted an eye about it, why would it be weird to be like this around Marvin? Maybe he should start sleeping with a shirt on. Maybe Marvin was bothered by it but didn’t want to be rude. He slept with a shirt on. Was it throwing him off that Jackie didn’t? Although, Marvin was very blunt, so if it was a problem he would have told him about this a while ago. 

Maybe he should wear shirts around Marvin until after this whole weird crush thing went away. He didn’t want to be awkward, well, more awkward around Marvin. What if this was all just a phase? What if his brain was being weird and taking some thoughts and twisting them into a romantic frame when it was just platonic? His brain was trying to process a Septiceye that was different from the others.

When he first met everyone else, there was always something that cut them off. His meeting with Anti was…bad, so that took him off the table immediately. He saw Chase as a parental figure, and Henrik took that title as well because it was even obvious to him that something was between them, but there wasn’t a name for it just yet. Something about JJ just screamed off-limits, and he was a good friend, so when Marvin came around, everything was different. Everything about Marvin was different. The way he carried himself, the way he had no fear when he spoke, his smile, his laugh, his-

Jackie was yanked out of those thoughts when the back of a hand pressed to his forehead.

“Huh?” 

“You’re looking red. I wanted to be sure you weren’t having a fever,” Marvin explained, lowering his hand. “Either it’s that, or you’re still recovering from seeing Chase and Henrik,” He added with a chuckle. 

“It was really gross,” Jackie said. 

“Some tea will help you forget. We’re also going to find Night tomorrow so there’s that to think about as well. I want this to be the last time we deal with him or I’m going to literally throw Dark at him and leave the Ipliers to suffer the consequences.” Marvin stirred some honey into his tea. 

“We should try to see if Host’s vision has changed. We didn’t really ask Mad about it, so I can call him in the morning and ask.” Jackie looked down at the other tea mug that was his but he wasn't ready to pick it up yet. 

“Speaking of the devil.” Marvin hummed when he pulled out his buzzing phone and saw Mad’s name on the caller ID. He didn’t have any pictures of the others to use as contact photos yet, so for the moment, Mad’s was the picture of Albert Einstein sticking out his tongue. “What are you doing up?” Marvin asked when he answered the call, putting it on speaker and setting the phone on the counter.

“You’re up as well. You can’t question me.” Mad retorted. “Am I on speaker?” 

“Yep. Jackie’s here.” 

“Hey.” Jackie waved at the phone despite knowing he couldn’t be seen. 

“Why are both of you up?” Mad asked.

“Mad, why are you calling?” Marvin didn’t want to keep going in circles about this. 

“It’s…It’s Host.” Mad’s tone changed.

“Is he okay?” 

“Kind of? I mean, he’s just-uh-he’s just really off after this whole thing with Night started.” There was a pause as a clicking sound came through the phone. “He says he can’t focus on anything else. Parts of the vision keep coming back, and it’s changing.” 

“Changing? Those things don’t change?” Jackie said. 

“They usually don’t. That’s what throwing Host off so much about this. Something about Night is throwing him off. I don’t know if it has anything to do with the supposed ‘God’ status of his or something else, but Edward’s been having to change his bandages several times a day instead of only once. That only happens when he’s beyond stressed out.” The clicking sound got faster. 

“Have you…read him lately?” Marvin asked. “Does he feel stressed?” 

“I’m not allowed to read him outside of my whole top-layer stuff I can’t control.” The clicking paused. “But, yeah, there’s some stress and confusion. I want to go deeper, but Host can tell when I’m reading him, and I don’t want him mad at me...I also don’t like seeing my friend hurting so much.” 

“How much of this does Dark know about?” 

“If he’s only overheard what me and Host were talking about today, then he only knows about me helping you guys find Night. Host wanted to know details of the tracker, and Dark cut us off before we could talk about anything else.” The clicked sound came back, and it was much slower than before. “Maybe we should do what Darks says and wait for him to figure it out.” 

“I haven’t listened to him since I’ve met him. I’m not about to start doing that now.” Marvin scoffed. “We’ll get Night tomorrow. I think getting him into the Manor will help Host with his problems.” 

“Okay…just…neither of you are allowed to get hurt,” Mad stated.

“Don’t worry. We’ll be fine.” Jackie said with a puff to his chest. 

“I’ve got a few tricks up my sleeve. This will be over soon.” Marvin promised. “Now, put the lighter away and go to bed.”

“What? What lighter? I don’t…” Mad’s weak denial turned into an even weaker laugh. 

“Oh! That’s what that sound was.” Jackie said.

“Good night, Mad.” Marvin hung up the call.

“Sounds like everyone’s being thrown off with this whole Night thing.” Jackie finally started drinking his tea. 

“Everything’s been off since I arrived,” Marvin mumbled to himself. “How are you feeling?” He asked Jackie before what he said could be processed. 

“I’m fine.” Jackie shrugged. 

“Just fine? That was a lot you went through today.” Marvin pocketed his phone and ended up standing closer to Jackie. “You’re allowed to be tired, upset, even a bit grumpy. You punched a man into a wall, you had to describe severe trauma, and you saw Chase and Henrik being gross. You can be not fine.”

“I’m…” Jackie was going to say ‘fine’ again, but it didn’t feel right anymore. 

“You’re what?” Marvin was now standing in front of Jackie, not technically trapping him, yet it almost felt like it.

“I-uh…I’m just-like…um…” Jackie cleared his throat.

“Jackie.” Marvin’s voice was stern, showing he wasn’t going to leave until he got an answer. 

“I’m…I’m tired, Marv,” Jackie confessed, his shoulders dropping. “I don’t know how to feel. I’m just tired.” 

“And that’s okay.” Marvin placed his hands on Jackie’s shoulders, squeezing them. “You can be tired.”  

“Thanks.” Jackie liked Marvin being this close. It was nice seeing the care in his eyes and the-

Nope, nope, nope.

Jackie, you need to not. 

Jackie quickly slipped away and fumbled back a few steps. 

“Did I step on your toes or something?” Marvin asked. 

“No! No, no, no.” Jackie waved his hands in front of himself. “Sorry. I just-the-the tea is kicking in, and I’m like super sleepy now.” 

“You don’t sound sleepy,” Marvin stated.

“I’m really good at hiding it.”

“You’re a terrible liar.”

“Those are different things.” Jackie felt the smile he gave twitch from his nerves as Marvin picked up both mugs and handed him his tea. 

“Did you want to watch anything together while you finish your drink?” Marvin asked.

“I’m just gonna chug and sleep. Got a lot to do tomorrow…night.” Jackie gave another awkward smile before scurrying out of the room. 

“Good night?” Marvin said mostly to himself as he stayed in the kitchen. “That was…weird?” 

[aszles]

csm chapter 120 but in toki pona (first 10 pages)

alright hellooo!!!! this is my first published translation in 2024 i guess!

of course i'm marketing this towards english speakers since i'm not sure if there actually is a part of the csm fandom that speaks toki pona... i hope you'll stick around to see something a little fun and different!

so if you don't know what toki pona is, allow me to explain! ☝️🤓 toki pona is a conlang created by Sonja Lang where the main draw of it is that it has less than 200 words! it sounds like it may be tricky to speak with so few words, but it's surprisingly easy and very fun! i always recommend it to anyone who has a bit of time on their hands and wants to try something new.

here i was mostly trying out gimp for comic translations, and so i translated the first 10 pages of chapter 120! i chose this because... it's silly! also fun fact, the start of this chapter was one of the things that pushed me to read chainsaw man!

ok that's enough preface rambling, let's get on with it!

i think typically the first page should be full sized if it has to, but nayuta peace sign is just so cute..!

alright, if you wanna feel like you're on a date with asa then keep reading to find an english translation and translator's notes! if not... feel free to leave, i hope you eat something nice today! (omekapo!)

semi-literal translation:

yoru: woof! woof! woof!!

nayuta: HAHAHAHAHAHA!! yoru: woof woof! wooof!! denji: Nayuta! what did you do?! nayuta: i turned her into an animal. denji: why?!?! nayuta: because she [kissed] my thing! (here she basically says that yoru interacted with nayuta's thing using her mouth. it's a very vague statement)

denji: i'm not your thing! turn her into a human now!! nayuta: want food! can't! (technically she says "food desire! no ability!") nuh uh! denji: ah?! i'll make food. when you eat turn her into a human!! nayuta: 'kay!

denji: eat and turn her into a human. i'm not joking. nayuta: hey! this is my food! bad! bad!! nayuta: hey... do you really want her humanity? (sounds very weird in english but i'm not sure a better way to put it) denji: what?

nayuta: Denji. every woman tries to kill you, right? why is this animal different? denji: why...? i have a feeling. nayuta: hmmmm.... good. (this is being used as an affirmation similar to "alright" or "very well then") you won't die. okay. i'll turn her into a human.

nayuta: but, two things. if they're not good to you, then she'll be an animal forever. denji: what are they?! nayuta: number one. i can eat ice cream (cold sweet) all the time. denji: i want (it) too. nayuta: number two.

nayuta: don't be nice to her. denji: are you joking?! nayuta: uh, i'm (being) real. this is the best. she's bad to my nose. denji: your nose?

denji: is she like a wet animal? nayuta: weirdo, wet animals are good! anyways, don't be nice to her! i'll change her knowledge... so that to her you didn't come (today)! denji: you'll what?! then she'll hate me!

nayuta: not important. you won't talk to her. denji: ahhh...

denji: you're number one, nayuta...

tadaaaa! there we have it! now time for some translator notes, of which there are actually not a ton.

toki pona is surprisingly difficult to adapt for different kinds of characters. due to having no register, it's hard to make characters seem more punky or polite than normal, and to distinguish between adult and child characters. here particularly we have the issue that, while Nayuta is a child, she's also super smart! so making grammatical mistakes doesn't really seem in line for her character. the main action i took was doubling up "la" with her. this isn't incorrect, but there are more optimal ways to say things to avoid ambiguity. i thought that perhaps a kid wouldn't think ahead with their words as much as an adult would, and may end up with this quirk in their speech.

related to the last note, one possible way of making a character seem younger or less proper is having them use nimisin ("unofficial" community made words). it's a fun idea, but it's kinda inaccessible and also... i don't really know nimisin! guess i'm not hip enough >_<

the name Nayuta luckily fits with toki pona phonetics (with the y changed to a j)! Denji doesn't quite, so i opted for Tensi. this is the most direct tokiponisation of his name. it sounds a bit like tenshi! (angel in japanese)

just a little something. i went with humans being "jan" and devils "monsuta" (hybrids and fiends may be jan monsuta and monsuta jan respectively, or they could have nimisin) so.. why are these two using jan? well for Denji that's an easier question, as he is basically human-first and also had the name before he became a hybrid. (also there's no need to be so descriptive with a headnoun) as for Nayuta, she uses jan because she's sort of undercover. depending on the circumstances, or when referring to her with her real name (like saying Control Devil in english) she would be monsuta. some devils who gave themself a name use jan, while others such as Power use monsuta (because why would she call herself a human when devils are clearly superior?!)

suwi lete or lete suwi? that is the question. here i decided to go with suwi lete because i think the most appealing aspect to Nayuta is likely the sweetness!

i hope this was at least somewhat enjoyable! i wonder what i'll find to translate next >w> thank you so much for reading if you did! sina lukin la mi pilin pona a!

[love-minor-poltergeist]

omg can you imagine the confusion when you explain Werner is your partner?

like you have a friend over at your house and they ask you „you said you have a boyfriend, right? is he home? how’d you guys meet?“ and you’re like „oh you know he’d been living in my walls since forever and I’ve always heard him scuttle around but I didn’t actually meet him until two years ago. he should be in his workshop right now!“ and then you point to a mouse hole jdkdkfoikfjd 😭

A/N: This idea sat in my brain for days and I just had to write a little ficlet for it-

╭ ─┉─ • ─┉─ ╮

"I... see," your friend says, offering a shaky smile that doesn't quite reach her eyes.

You invited her over to your small hovel for a cup of coffee and some desserts. It's been ages since you last spoke to her, as she's moved off the isles to pursue her dream job. And while she's sweeter than peaches normally, a part of you feared she'd react this way.

Still, she remains polite and refrains from making any comment. She takes a cautious sip from her mug, all the while shifting her gaze from you to the mouse hole in the wall.

"H-how... How long have the two of you been dating now, dear? What was his name again?" she asks, now fixedly staring at the hole in the wall.

"Oh!" you grin. "We've just started dating not too long ago actually! Maybe around two months now? It just sort of happened, ya know? It took some getting used to, but Werner's a total sweetheart once he warms up to you!"

"Werner? Is he German?" she looks back to you, brow raised.

"Technically, yes! Buuut," you lean towards her, voice taking on a conspiratorial whisper. "I'm pretty sure he hams up the accent. I've heard him drop it a couple of times. It's actually funny-"

"Mein Liebling," a small voice interrupts.

Both you and your friend whip your heads towards the wall-- to Werner's little mouse hole. You're both met with the sight of a disgruntled Werner, overalls marred with oil stains and helmet askew. His gaze drifts over to your guest, and he grows sheepish.

"Ah, Guten Tag," he awkwardly waves.

He's completely forgotten that you were inviting someone into the house, and Werner suddenly feels all too aware of his disheveled appearance. The rat shakes his head, turning back to you as he fights to ignore the stranger's stare burning into his side.

"Have you seen the can opener? I thought I had left it at my station the other night-"

"Oh, yes! Sorry, I had to borrow it for a minute! Let me just..."

You rise from your chair, easily reaching the kitchen in a few strides to grab the said tool from the dish rack. Without a second thought, you made your to your boyfriend's little hidey-hole and carefully placed it in his outstretched hands.

"Danke schön," he nods to you before skittering back inside, the sounds of muffled metal scrapes shortly following in his wake.

All you can do is quietly smile and mentally coo at how small he is before you settle back into place at the table. Blissfully unaware of your friend's incredulous stare you grab your coffee cup and look back to her, smile still in place.

"Sorry about that! He's usually tinkering away at all hours of the day! So, uh, he can be a little socially...clumsy, so to speak."

"Uh.. huh," your friend nods, eyes distant as she not-at-all subtly looks over your shoulder. "...You sure know how to pick them, eh?"

"Oh, it could be worse. He tried to shoot me the first time we met, but things are better now-"

"I beg your pardon?!"

╰ ─┉─¡! • !¡─┉─╯

[honeysuckle-venom]

Warning: weight loss mention (no in depth discussion about feelings yet)

So. Those of you who keep up to date with my personal posts will know that on Monday I saw a new hepatologist to discuss my many (non-cancerous) liver tumors and what to do about them.

The answers I got were more or less what I expected. Thankfully, I don't need any scary procedures any time soon, and possibly won't ever need surgery, which would be fantastic. As I suspected, I'm not a good candidate for resection anyway. Since I'm largely asymptomatic we don't need to look into something like trans arterial embolization right now, let alone transplant. Yay! Also, they said I can safely eat moderate amounts of soy, which is great, because I like soy based foods. That's the good news.

There were a few pieces of bad news. The first was that while I knew I couldn't be on estrogen based birth control, they said it wouldn't be safe for me to risk progesterone based birth control either. I have to stay off entirely. So that kind of sucks, I hate just getting my period naturally every month, the pmdd symptoms are so much worse that way. But I'll take horrible cramps and mental health struggles over tumor growth.

And speaking of mental health struggles being preferable to tumor growth, the other thing that was made very clear to me was that I absolutely must lose weight. Estrogen production increases with large amounts of fatty tissue, and the doctor said that's the main reason these tumors are worsened by weight gain. She thinks that the amount of tumor growth they found was within the margin of error, so it's possible it didn't grow, but if it did grow it's likely because I gained some weight in the past year. (They're going to look at all my MRIs during rounds next week with a radiologist to see if it really grew or not). It was made very clear to me that the only way to get them to shrink is to lose weight, and that if I don't or if I gain weight I'm at serious risk of them growing.

So. Weight loss. Apparently not super optional. I mean, I know I have bodily autonomy, I could decide not to lost weight technically, but yeah the consequences here are serious and not worth messing around with. Which means for the first time since I was an anorexic teenager I will be trying to lose weight.

I have...a lot of conflicting feelings about that, but this post is already long and I feel like those feelings should go in their own post so I can adequately explain and trigger warn. So. I'll stop here for now.

[sanddusted-wisteria]

I have a crack theory that has absolutely no bearing on the story whatsoever: Qi never got his doctorate/PhD.

[Put the rest under a read more in case you don’t want to read like 3 pages of straight up speculation over nothing holy shit]

(to preface, getting a PhD is basically what separates a student and a professional researcher in academia. You most likely can’t be a professor without one, and research jobs in non-academic labs aren't likely to take you either. Getting a PhD also earns you the title of "Dr.", same as an MD.)

Even though Qi is referred to as “Dr. Qi” by several people, when he’s actually called that in his earshot, he insists on being called “Director”.

The way Qi speaks is very “technically correct” and literal, according to one of the writers.

[taken from an Ask the Dev segment on the Pathea discord.]

So maybe he insists on being called “Director” because it’s technically the only title he actually holds. Your college professors have doctorates, but you can probably call them “Professor” or “Doctor” interchangeably and it’ll still be okay with them. So why doesn’t Qi also operate like that?

PhDs also typically take 5 years to complete (and that’s assuming nothing goes wrong…). You’ll probably be in your late 20s by the time you’re done. But…how old is Qi? He hasn’t been assigned a canon age yet, but we can make a few guesses.

There’s a photo of his family in his room that is dated from year 80. MTaS starts at year 98 (or 97, I have to check). Considering that adult Qi is about 5’11”/180 cm, he’s definitely younger than a teenager in this pic when we see his relative height here. I say he looks around 8-10? That means that by the start of MTaS, he’s around 26-28. It should be around this time that he finishes his doctorate and has a successful dissertation defense. But he’s in Sandrock… There’s also this line from one of the main missions (no spoilers) that implies that Qi’s been in Sandrock for around 7 years. So he potentially left Vega 5 and came to Sandrock when he was in his early 20s.

But when did he graduate, then? It’s a bit more possible that he got his Bachelor's degree super early. Maybe he skipped a few grades, maybe he sigma grindsetted his degree plan. With the more course-based and structured nature of Bachelor’s programs, it probably would’ve been easier to speedrun. A big research effort like a dissertation takes more time to properly do and can't really be sped up that much, since it's intended to be a culmination of all the knowledge you've gained on a particular subject.

But then what happened after that?? He started work on his PhD, but then…his dissertation work got stolen. In The Assistant, Qi says at some point while he was at uni, his work was stolen.

He doesn’t specify what it was, but it was bad enough that he refused to work directly with anyone else since. Losing your dissertation is…bad, to say the least. It could’ve been stolen, you’ve might’ve lost it, or someone else just happened to do the same thing you were doing and publish it first. Whatever the case, if that happens, at worst, you need to start from square one. Years of work, straight into the garbage. It’s also a matter of money, too. Do you have enough to pull you through a couple extra years of tuition? Can you renew your assistantship? Considering his parents are humble fishermen, Qi probably couldn't secure the funds to keep going. So he threw up his hands and quit school, and tried to find research work on his own merit. Without a doctorate, though, he probably was only able to take low-rank or assistant jobs. Instead of being assessed on his talents as is, his lack of a title barred him from making any advancements. So he left. It would explain this line, where he talks about leaving Vega 5 due to “bureaucratic pedantry”:

Qi’s the only researcher in Sandrock, and is therefore Director by default. He might be in Sandrock to find the Olympia, but is he also there because that’s the only place he has any authority? Is Sandrock the only place where people will take him seriously? Is he clinging to that? Is that why he insists on people calling him Director…?

…Well now I’m sad. I’ll end this on a higher note with an even crackier theory: Merlin from MTaP was the one who stole his work. There is absolutely NO evidence for this, I just think it’d be funny.

Merlin was “the most promising apprentice” at Vega 5, but was kicked out for performing an experiment so egregious that even Vega 5 wanted nothing to do with her. What if she had a rivalry going with Qi while they were in school, and it culminated in her stealing his research? Whatever the hell Qi was planning to do was so off the cuff that she took the fall for him when she actually did it. And Qi was planning on leaving Vega 5 anyway, so he’d be free to continue his mad scientist shit elsewhere. Alternatively, Merlin stole his work, he saw that she got kicked out, and he decided to skedaddle knowing that he’d probably be next if he kept going.

okay that's enough spitballing thank u for coming to my ted talk

[gible-love-nibles-archive]

The Start of Team Soup (pt. 3)

So. It's been almost two months since I've done any writing. Oops. Yeah, I didn't really do any in October and I only really started working on this in November. My job has been unexpectedly super draining on my creative juices! So I focused in on just one project to work on, and that ended up being the PMD AU. I definitely want to work on other things I have on the back burner, but I think for now, get used to seeing these funky little critters.

Word Count: 3.1k

Taglist: @crickiss @heart-of-aspiration @halsdaisy @sifeas @jocelynships @imaginemyshipswithme @keyblade-ships @wooboomoomoo @seahydra [If you want to added or removed, tell me in a comment or tag!]

(Please reblog! I like reading tags :])

That night… Clare had a strange dream.

She was in a multicolored space, sleeping but she could still sense everything around her.

“... ... … … … … Where… am I…?  This… is a dream, right…?”

Suddenly, Clare could sense someone else with her.  But they were very faint.

“Hello?  Who are you?  Do I know you?  Should I know you?”

They attempted to speak, but it was barely audible with how far away they were and how soft their voice was.

And already Clare was beginning to wake up.

…

The Chikorita sat up in her bed.

“I dreamt something,” she muttered to herself.  “But I can’t remember what it was about…”  She stared at the basket full of Apples and berries for a while.  Finally, she shook her head.  “I shouldn’t be worrying about that right now,” she internally decided.  “Let’s just worry about rescue work for now.”

She went outside to check her Mailbox.  She found it was void of anything new, so she decided to read the newspaper Giovanni was telling her about yesterday.

“You’re up early.”  Peering over the paper, Clare found Giovanni looking at her with a small smile. “Anything in the Mailbox?”

“Nope.”

The Squirtle sighed. “Yeah, I kinda figured… We’re still really new to this.” Then he perked up. “Hey, why not head to Pokemon Square?  It’s a super helpful hub for rescue teams, and the Pelipper Post Office usually has jobs posted outside.”

With no better ideas, Clare followed behind Giovanni.

…

Luckily, the Square wasn’t far at all.  They followed a short path and crossed a small wooden bridge over a creek.  Giovanni pointed out all the different shops: two Kecleon ran the item shop (one sold general items, and the other sold Orbs and Technical Machines), Persian ran the bank, Gulpin ran the Link Shop—

“Link Shop?”

“Gulpin can link moves together.  If moves are linked, you can use them at the same time!  Just, ask Gulpin if you wanna know more; he explains it better than me.”

Kangaskhan ran a storage shop.  

“If you store any items with Ms. Kangaskhan, they’ll never get lost!  It’s super important that we store any items we don’t want to lose with her in case we faint.”

And finally, Makuhita ran the dojo.

“He can help train us or teach us about stuff in dungeons.”  

As Giovanni and Clare came back to the town center, he noticed the Chikorita’s eyes darting away from others and using her leaf to hide her face. “Everyone’s super nice here; don’t be so nervous!  They just want to help.” 

He then started down the east road, Clare following behind. “And down here’s the Pelipper Post Office.  They’re super up-to-date on rescue information.  We should be able to get some jobs on the bulletin board.” Giovanni began to pluck off some papers from the board.  

“…What do you think we should do about the grass?”  Clare finally piped up.

“What grass?”

“The dead grass in front of our base.  We should probably start thinking about fixing up the whole base, yeah?  We can start small with the grass.”

“Hm… Good point.  Why don’t we focus on that today instead of a job?”

That was how the team spent the next few days, alternating between repair of their base and rescue offers.  It kept them both busy, and it kept Clare’s mind off her strange dreams.

…

One morning, when Clare came out of her house with Giovanni greeting her, the earth began to shake under their feet.

“Eh?”

“What’s going on?!”

They both whipped their heads around to the sound of someone popping out of the dirt.

“Tunnel over here!”

Pop!

“Tunnel over there!”

Pop!

“Tunnels everywhere!  Woohoo!  Digging is so much fun!” The new arrival-- a Diglett-- cheered and giggled to himself before looking around.  “Err, umm… wait, where am I?”

“False alarm,” Giovanni sighed. “No real quakes; just a kid having a blast.”

Diglett whirled around, looking bashful. “Oh my!  My apologies!  My name is Diglett.  I was digging holes around the Pelipper Post Office, so much so that I kept digging all the way here!  I’m sorry I ruined your nice place!”

Clare chuckled. “Frankly, it can’t get much worse.  Don’t worry about it.”

“Are you saying you forgive me?” The Ground type’s eyes sparkled.

“Yup.  Just be careful; most people won’t appreciate holes around their properties.  Try not to dig too many, ok Diglett?”

“Of course!  Thank you!  I’ll still have fun digging, but I’ll make sure to patch up the holes from time to time!  Bye-bye!” With that, Diglett dug back down into the hole and disappeared.

“He said that he was digging holes around the Pelipper Post Office.  I bet we could get there with this hole now without going through town!” Giovanni jumped in with no hesitation.

“…I’m slightly concerned that you did that with no prodding whatsoever.”

…

Another strange dream.  The same multicolored space.

“… … … … … …Back here again.”

Clare sensed another presence.  The same one from the last dream.  Whoever they were, they were a bit closer this time.

They tried to speak.  It was possible to hear them this time, but they were still quiet and unclear.  Clare strained to listen.

“Hello?  Hello?  Can you speak up please?”

Then, the ground rumbled.

“An earthquake?  In my dream?”

The ground shook louder and more intensely.  

“Oh jeez—!  This feels pretty real for a dream.”

The presence vanished, but Clare was too occupied by the ground to notice.

…

When the Chikorita woke up the next morning, she knew her first course of action was asking Giovanni about the ground shaking.  If it was real, he would’ve had to feel it too.  She stretched out on her bed.

“Uhh… hello?”

Clare jolted up.  Was there someone in the house?  A quick look around revealed no one.

“Um, hello?  You are Clare… correct?”

She stepped out of her bed and looked around again.  Still, no one.

“Are… you a ghost?”

“Oh!  You can’t see us, of course!  How very rude of us!” Clare yelped as a Dugtrio burst out of the ground right underneath her feet; she was thrown back a bit onto her bed. “We’re pleased to meet you.  We are Dugtrio.”

“…Charmed.”

“Last night, during the earthquake, our child Diglett was attacked!”

“What?  Diglett?  Attacked?”

“Yes!  He was whisked away to the peak of a tall mountain.  We couldn’t possibly climb somewhere so high up.  That is why we must call upon your help, Clare.  Diglett was abducted by a Pokemon named Skarmory.”

Clare shivered.  If the name was anything to go by, this Pokemon would not be pleasant.

“It’s a vilely vicious ruffian!” Dugtrio continued, absolutely not calming Clare’s nerves. “Please do be careful.  We need your help!  We must go!” And with that, Dugtrio burrowed into the floor, leaving no hole behind.

.........That was so fast, the Grass type barely had the chance to rub the sleep out of her eyes.  But Diglett being kidnapped was much more concerning.  She had to tell Giovanni immediately: they had a rescue mission.

She darted outside, and Giovanni wasn’t too far behind from the left path. “Mornin’!” He greeted her cheerfully.

“Dude.  We’ve gotta go now.  We’ve got a real-deal rescue mission.”

“Woah, woah, slow down; you just came outside.  What do you mean we have a rescue mission?  …I mean, that’s great!  But—”

“Yes, it’s true!” A voice came from below.  Dugtrio burst out of the ground, and Team Soup was flung backwards. “Our child Diglett was kidnapped!  He was taken to Mt. Steel’s summit!  Please, we need your help!  Bye-bye!” Then the Ground-type went back down, leaving a map behind.

Giovanni blinked at his rescue partner. “Alright.  I see what happened now.” A pause. “Wait, Diglett was the kid digging holes around here the other day!”

“Exactly!  We gotta go help him!”

“Mt. Steel doesn’t sound real nice though…”

“Rescue team work isn’t always parades and parties; now, c’mon!!”

…

The two stood across from the menacing cave opening of Mt. Steel.  They couldn’t see inside at all.

“Here we are,” Clare said simply. “Dugtrio said Diglett was whisked up to the peak of this mountain.”

“That’s right!” A voice from underground jolted the two rescuers for a moment.

“Dugtrio?!  You followed us all the way out here?  Without telling us?” Giovanni cried.

“Indeed!” The three-headed (three-bodied?) Pokemon emerged violently from the ground, startling the rescue team again. “The peak is the ninth floor!  Thank you for helping!  Farewell!” He descended as quickly as he came up.

“Er… It’s no problem at all, Dugtrio.”

The two rescuers looked at each other, and nodded.  They both knew what had to be done.

Mt. Steel was the biggest challenge Team Soup had faced thus far.  The first few floors weren't so bad, but the climb only became more treacherous as the pair went up.  The enemies were tougher, but that meant Clare and Giovanni also got stronger in the process.  They even learned some new moves (though Giovanni wasn't thrilled about his move only raising his defense while Clare's was poisoning other Pokemon).

...

“...What's our strategy for Skarmory?” The Chikorita asked when they had a little room to breathe.

“What do you mean?”

“Giovanni, Skarmory's a Steel and Flying type.  We're at a huge disadvantage here.” Giovanni started to open his mouth to respond. “And before you say, 'Oh, then we'll just hit him as hard as we can', almost all of our moves won't be very effective.”

The Squirtle clamped his mouth closed, looking annoyed that he was read so easily.  Then he put a hand to his chin. “Then how about... we POISON him?!” A devious grin flourished on his face.

“Can't.  Steel types can't be poisoned.” And it immediately fell off his face. “Our best bet is probably using the items we've collected.  We can try to talk him down, but I get the feeling he won't be very chatty.”

“Hey!  No matter what, we got this!  We've not failed a single mission, and we're not about to start now!”

Clare smiled at Giovanni's optimism.  It put her a bit more at ease, even as they were climbing up to the summit.

...

The wind whipped around sharply at the top of Mt. Steel, and the near completely flat ground provided no cover.  Square-cut rocks shined like metal in the sun.

“Clare, look!  Diglett's over there!” The little Ground-type was secluded on a small ledge, which seemed to be Skarmory's perch. “Hey, are you alright out there?” Giovanni cried out over the wind. “We're here to rescue you, kid!”

“I... I'm scared...” Diglett whimpered.

Suddenly, something shot up from the chasm between Team Soup and Diglett.  The rescue team jumped back in surprise as it zipped down to the ledge just as quickly.

This Pokemon was a sleek metallic gray with crimson wings and sharp yellow eyes.  

Skarmory.

“You!  What do you think you're doing here?!”

“Uh, I just said what we're doing here.” The Squirtle said indignantly. “We're here to rescue Diglett!”

“Skarmory, let him go.” Clare stepped up, trying not to let Giovanni agitate Skarmory further. “Diglett's done nothing wrong.”

“How can you believe that?!  This is all their fault!  I haven't slept in days because the earthquakes frighten me so!  Every night we have them!  And it's all because of that brat's ilk running around underground!”

“Well, you're not wrong about the earthquakes; there have been quite a lot.  But it would take more than one Diglett to cause something as big as an earthquake, especially if it can be felt all the way up here.”

“You be quiet!  We'll fight if you keep that up!”

“It's no use.  Skarmory's too angry to listen to us.”

“We'll have to fight it out!” Giovanni got into a fighting pose alongside Clare.

Skarmory let out a shrill cry at the two and the battle began.

Skarmory wasted no time in closing the distance between them, and proceeded to slash and peck at the two with his talons and beak.  The two retaliated with their own elemental attacks.  Giovanni was mostly successful at taking a brunt of the damage thanks to Withdraw.  But with Skarmory using Leer to lower his Defense back down, the combatants were at a stalemate.

Clare kept the team healthy with Oran Berries from their supplies, but they only had two left now.  They had to switch strategies and fast.

What did they have?  Pecha Berries, Cheri Berries, Blast Seeds... That's it!

"Gio, catch!" Clare called out to her partner as she threw a Blast Seed towards him.  The Squirtle caught it and didn't hesitate on shoving it into his mouth.

His face quickly contorted into wide-eyed shock as he covered his mouth with his hands.  Skarmory paused for a moment in confusion.  But that was just the hesitation the team needed; the Steel-Flying type got blasted in the face from an explosion from Giovanni's mouth.

Skarmory screeched and stumbled back.  From that and the team's other attacks, it looked like he had been beaten. ”Grrr... I can't keep up!  I'll flee for now!“ The steel bird shot up into the sky once more, crookedly flying away.

It was quiet for a bit before Clare let out a little laugh. “We did it Gio, we did it!!”

“Hey Clare,” The Water-type breathed heavily. “Could you do me a little favor and WARN me next time you DO THAT?!”

”Oh.  Yeah.” Now that feeling of pride was pushed down by embarrassment. “Sorry about that; it was the only thing I could think of.“

”...Eh, it's alright.  I get it.  Water under the bridge.  Now let's worry about Diglett.”

The pair walked to the edge of the chasm.  Clare looked down for a moment, but quickly shot her head back up. “I can’t see the bottom,” she noted with a scared strain in her voice.

“How do you think we should do this?” Giovanni asked, seemingly oblivious to Clare’s fright.  He put a hand up to his chin in thought, then pounded one fist into his palm with a smile. “You can use your vines to stretch me across the gap and I can grab Diglett from there!  Then you’d just reel us back in.”

“...I don’t have vines.”

“...You, should have vines.  Don’t Grass-types usually have vines?”

“Sure, but not all of them.  And I’m pretty sure I’m one without vines.”

There was a long pause.

“Oh Arceus, what are we gonna do.”

An electronic sound from above caught the pair’s attention.  Looking up, two Magnemite were floating down to them.

“BZBZBZZ!”

“Oh, hey!  You’re the Magnemite from Thunderwave Cave!” Clare tilted her head as the Steel/Electric pair drifted closer. “What are you doing here?”

“WE HEARD WORD OF THIS.  WE CAN RESCUE DIGLETT FROM THE SKY.  BZBZBZZ!”

“With… your magnets?  What would he grab onto?  Can he grab on?” The Squirtle quietly talked to himself as the Magnemite flew over the opposite side of the cliff and approached Diglett.

“HOLD ON TO US TIGHT.” “DON’T BE SCARED.  WE WON’T MAKE THE MISTAKE OF ZAPPING YOU.”

“Oh… Alright…” It seemed the poor kid had been frozen with fright the whole time.  But now with the helpful Magnemite, his nerves calmed a bit.

…

“Ohhh… I was very scared.  Maybe because I was up somewhere so high… My feet feel like they’re still walking on air.”

The whole party had descended down the mountain and were huddled outside Team Soup’s rescue base.

Giovanni glanced sideways to Clare with squinted eyes. “...Feet?” He whispered.  The Grass-type just shrugged.

“HE HAS THEM?  FEET?” The Magnemite attempted to whisper to each other.

“Well, you’re safe and that’s what really matters,” Clare said to the little Ground-type, trying to steer the conversation away from appendages that may or may not exist.

“Yeah!  Thank you very much.”

“Oh, you’ve been rescued!  Great!  Great!”

Everyone paused and whirled around themselves, trying to find this new mystery voice.

“HM?  WHAT WAS THAT?” “AM I HEARING VOICES?”

“...Dugtrio?” The Squirtle asked to the ground.

“Whoops!  You can’t see us?  That’s terribly rude of us!” As predicted, Dugtrio erupted from the earth right next to Giovanni, making him shriek, jump, and nearly crash into Clare. “Hello.  Dugtrio here.”

“Oh!  Papa!” Diglett chirped.

“Diglett!  You had us worried!  You’re not hurt?”

“Nope!  It was scary, but I’m all right.  It’s all thanks to Clare’s team.”

“Thank you for everything.  You’re heroes.”

“Thank you, but… You should really be thanking the Magnemite.  This rescue would have been impossible without them.” Clare flicked her leaf towards them.

Dugtrio turned to the pair of Steel-Electric types. “Oh, how rude of us!  Thank you so much!”

“NO, NO.  IT WAS THE ONLY THING TO DO.  AND… HOW BOTH OUR EVOLVED FORMS ARE JOINED TRIOS… I FELT A CERTAIN KINSHIP.  AFTER ALL, POKEMON MUST HELP EACH OTHER.”

“I’m impressed.  Sincerely, thank you.” Dugtrio then looked back at Team Soup. “We must be going.  Clare.  Giovanni.  Thank you.  Farewell!”

“Bye!” 

With Diglett’s final goodbye, the two Ground-types buried under the soil and zoomed off, leaving behind a few rewards for the rescue team.

“WE’LL BE ON OUR WAY TOO.” Magnemite said.

“Wait, wait, wait; hold on a sec, you two!” Giovanni stepped in front of the two.

“WHAT IS IT?”

“Well, I’ve been standing here thinking we couldn’t have done that last mission without you guys.  And we’re probably going to need help like that again.”

“To put it in a less long-winded way: Would you like to join our team?” Clare didn’t fail to notice her partner’s unamused side eye.

“JOIN YOUR TEAM?”

“Yes.  We’d love to have you with us.  O-Only if you want to, of course!  We won’t force you or anything.”

“RESCUE TEAM… THAT SOUNDS FUN!” The Magnemite on the left’s magnets buzzed with excitement. 

“BUT… IF YOU NEED US TO RUSH OVER TO RESCUES… WE NEED SOMEWHERE TO LIVE CLOSE BY.  IS THERE ANYWHERE WE CAN LIVE IN THIS AREA?” The Magnemite on the right tilted itself at an angle.

“Er… Well…” The Squirtle scratched the back of his head.

“OH… THERE ISN’T… TOO BAD.  SORRY, BUT WE CAN’T JOIN YOU.  SEE YOU!” Their magnets continued to buzz as the pair left.

“Well, that’s a shame,” Clare said with a sigh. “But they’re right.  Team members should live close by so they can leave quickly or we can contact them easily.”

“Then we need to find some real estate that we can use!  Then we can start recruiting.”

“How are we gonna do that?”

Giovanni thought about it for a moment, then gained a wide grin and started pushing the Chikorita towards her house. “Let me worry about that!  You just get some rest tonight.”

“...Could you try and sound less suspicious when you say that?”

But he was already running off. “See ya tomorrow!”

Clare just huffed.

[shytulipghost]

Hello, this is the follow-up to the Dracula Analog Horror vs ARG poll. I promised that I would explain the possible pros and cons of both formats, so here we go:

NOTE: I won't explicitly give any spoilers, but proceed with caution just in case.

PART 1: A Dracula-inspired ARG

PROS:

It would have a similar structure to the book: So we know the book compiles journal entries, audio recordings and letters, right? Well, in this modern adaptation, the characters could have YouTube, Twitter, Tumblr accounts or whatever fits best with their personalities. For reference, Marble Hornets uploaded their content in three different accounts: their main YouTube channel, the totheark channel and their Twitter page. Besides videos, there could also be photos and chat messages. Jonathan could record the first entries on his phone, for instance.

It would be similar to Dracula Daily: the cast would post the content on the exact dates, so there would be suspense when viewers don't get any new entries.

It would be more immersive: the cast would be like "This is totally happening in real time, guys".

CONS

People who dislike unreality for mental health reasons may find this format problematic: I think this would be more of a problem if A) the viewer knew nothing about the novel and watched the series completely blind, B) the creator changed all the characters' names, or C) the special effects were convincing. If anyone struggles with this, feel free to give your thoughts on the matter.

How would Jonathan upload the first entries on YouTube?: Since Dracula doesn't want Jonathan to have contact with the outside world, it wouldn't make sense for him to have WiFi in his castle. Would he even know what the Internet is? Speaking of the Internet, I think Dracula should have zero knowledge about it or else there would be more plotholes, especially in the final chapters.

Why would Seward upload things showing tragic moments?: I can't go into detail because of spoilers, but it would be disrespectful to the person involved if he did that (If I were in that situation, I would be angry if someone started recording me as I'm suffering). One could argue that, instead of uploading a video, he could tweet something like: "Unfortunately, this happened today". But then, how does the creator show the weird thing that happens prior to that tragic scene? Remember that showing is better than telling, especially in horror.

On a technical aspect, it would be a mess: While some people might enjoy the challenge of finding the entries themselves, how is the audience supposed to know when the ARG starts? The point of an ARG is to convince people that it's real, so the creator can't say on their page: "Hey guys, the ARG starts next week. Content warning: blah, blah, blah...". Also, what if the audience never finds one of the character's entries.

PART 2: A Dracula-inspired Analog Horror series

PROS:

It would make sense for Seward's entries: it would be unprofessional for him to start a podcast to talk badly about one of his patients. So a better idea would be to show his entries as footage from a security camera in Renfield's room. The video description would be something like: "This is leaked footage from the psychiatric hospital".

It would make sense for the entries related to Lucy: Maybe I or someone else can develop this point further on September/October.

All the character entries can be found in one Youtube channel: Instead of going to several social media pages or websites to find all the entries, the viewer could simply go to one site to follow the whole story. The entries could be uploaded in the same order as the book.

It would solve the plothole mentioned in the previous section: Without going into spoilers, the epistolary format of the novel becomes more relevant in the plot. An in-universe explanation for the existence of the channel would be that [MAIN CHARACTER] created the account to show the videos Jonathan recorded during his trip and also share what happened to the rest of the cast. In other words, the series would technically start in media res.

CONS:

The creator would have to come up with new powers for Dracula (this applies to the ARG version as well): If the creator just gives Dracula the powers he has in the book, the audience would go "Oh, it's just a normal vampire. It's not that scary". I think the creator could look up vampire myths/folklore and focus on the powers that pop culture doesn't mention. That would add more mystery and creepiness.

The first entries would not be uploaded on the exact dates: the footage can say 03/05/202X (I'm not American, so it's day/month/year) in the corner of the screen, but it's not the same.

Well, those are all the points I could think of. Feel free to reblog if you want to add another point in favour or against ARG/analog horror.

[simplytheevebest]

I posted 1,167 times in 2022

That's 1,167 more posts than 2021!

175 posts created (15%)

992 posts reblogged (85%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@eves-da-best

@youleavethetardisbrakeson

@astrid-v

@evebestt

@faytalepsy

I tagged 1,048 of my posts in 2022

Only 10% of my posts had no tags

#eve best - 828 posts

#fate the winx saga - 430 posts

#ftws - 419 posts

#house of the dragon - 411 posts

#fate winx saga - 404 posts

#hotd - 402 posts

#fate: the winx saga - 400 posts

#rhaenys targaryen - 380 posts

#rhaenys velaryon - 373 posts

#farah dowling - 334 posts

Longest Tag: 136 characters

#i just don't agree with the creators explanation of motherhood and making it sound like rhaenys could've ended the war before it started

My Top Posts in 2022:

#5

An absolutely wild theory, but after talking to my cousin and showing her the scenes (she is a video editing wizard) I am thinking they filmed Farah's scenes separately. Like entirely. The camera angles and positioning of the characters is done in such a way that they don't ever explicitly interact or touch until the end when Bloom and Farah hug. And even then, we don't see Bloom's face when she hugs Farah, nor Farah's face when they show Bloom. And it's not like the hug in s1, where it was shown from multiple angles but clearly it was the actors.

I don't know, the blocking of the scenes is very deliberate, I feel like, where they stand separate in the old house and the lighting on Farah's face is different from the lighting with the others. Which if this is true, highlights again how lucky we are to have gotten those scenes from Eve Best if this was all they could arrange with her schedule on House of the Dragon (and also why we didn't get any Silrah scenes).

Edit: okay so not so wild after all! @eves-da-best found this article (thank you my dear) where the actors explain Eve Best actually filmed scenes on the HotD set and her lines on her phone to send over. So we can acknowledge how AMAZING it is that she would be willing to do that now that she is, as Eliot Salt said best "a House of the Dragon icon."

230 notes - Posted September 16, 2022

#4

Sky: Can I ask you for dating advice?

Saul: Just because I'm with Farah doesn't mean I know how I did it

250 notes - Posted July 26, 2022

#3

Farah, post s2, alive and well as it should be: I learned some very valuable lessons from this

Saul: I’m guessing they are all horrible distortions on the lessons you actually should’ve taken away

Farah: Death isn’t real, and I’m basically God

259 notes - Posted September 17, 2022

#2

S2 Has Officially Broken Me, or the Farah the Fern AU Nobody in Their Right Mind Would Ever Ask For

So I don't see why Farah the fern couldn't have been a thing. Like okay she can't retain a physical form for extended periods of time while her magic recharges and they figure out how to give her a physical form for good, so just keep her in a pot on the desk. Zap her with some magic when you want a chat like a magic, magic 8 ball.

I'm just imagining Saul at her desk doing the paperwork that's technically part of her job and she's a fern so she can't do anything except, I don't know, change colors? Wave leaves? Maybe as she regains more magic she can change plants, so she keeps turning into a cactus and Saul knows that means she doesn't want him doing her work and she knows that he knows but he just ignores her like "sorry I don't speak plant."

This has the same energy as invisible Stella chucking plants to the floor when the girls talked about something and she disagreed. Like imagine they take turns showing her around the school and talking to her so she doesn't feel left out or cooped up in her office because she's a literal plant and can't leave. And Riven carries around a potted plant for a whole afternoon with ridiculous commentary until Musa appears with actual Farah the Fern and it turns out he's been talking to a normal plant all day, so then they have to decorate the pot so that mix up doesn't happen again.

And there's an argument about keeping her in the common room of the suite at night because they all want her near but maybe she'd like to be in her own quarters? Will she get lonely? And Saul steps in like "alright, enough, if Headmistress Dowling is sleeping anywhere it's with me" and then he has to contend with the shit-eating grins of his students for that little slip up and poor Farah just has to listen to all of this.

I might have cried out all my braincells with this AU guys, but I'm not sorry ❤️ it's making me laugh, that's what matters

Edit: this is now a thing! Farah the Fern Masterlist

260 notes - Posted September 17, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

Okay but can we talk about the face Rhaenys made when Daemon suggested the Blacks "had Meleys" without even asking her if she was supporting them?

She literally went:

262 notes - Posted October 24, 2022

Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →

[o5-10]

I don't remember how I felt about what I did in that reality that wasn't that you all forced me through, if I even felt anything at that point, but I am irrationally wishing I could bring myself to do it in this reality, the one that does exist for me. I doubt I ever will. I shouldn't want that, but between my inquiry going ignored, which I should have expected, and remembering how she responded to everything I have been doing for decades by throwing it all in my face with maximum spite, I am just not feeling very amicable. It's not that I expected an answer from them, I can't expect that from them, and it's not that I thought she would be grateful for my actions, but I had hoped she would understand.

I think I am cycling through all of these memories specifically because I cannot sleep. The problem with this is that these memories are making it harder to sleep. I'm used to not sleeping for extended periods, but the level of exhaustion I am at, for reasons I cannot figure out, is such that I haven't felt since the day Six would consider the start of our romantic entanglement, last I checked. Not the day we actually agreed on, though. There are many dates that could count for that for us, which is strange. I'm rambling.

The point is I am stuck in the most vicious cycle of not sleeping I have experienced in a very, very long time. I am more exhausted than I ever was during that dream state (calling it a "dream" feels wrong). I am the kind of exhausted I was when I was so blasted from the damned cognitohazards that I could not even get microsleeps in and had to have been on day five (5) without even that much, and maybe day eight (8) or nine (9) without sleep except microsleeps, and I was running on maybe three (3) hours before that.

I was so exhausted at that point that, when Six came to check on me (I can't get into the logistics of this, since this was while he was still under the restraining order, but I am too exhausted to explain that part), I tried to get up to do something, I can't remember what right now, insisting "Don't need help. I'm fine," followed immediately by my legs completely gave out and I just crumpled. All I could say about it was "I just go here now." And then we started texting instead of speaking out loud, because it was easier to process the words, and he hit send too fast, I then, in my infinite eloquence in that moment, responded with, "Join the club. Hitting send club not the floor club. You can be on floor too if you want though." And he just carried me to my room at that point, because I was not going to be getting back up any time soon, but he did it badly, half of my body was dragging on the floor. Not the point. I am getting distracted. What is wrong with me?

What I am getting at is that, while my body is still doing what I want it to right now, other than not gifting me reprieve of this exhaustion, this is exceedingly not normal for me, it's actively impeding me, though I am ahead enough on work that I should be fine on that front, provided no one needs anything from me, which, One might, and I can't refuse if he asks. Anyway, this has only happened to me once, well, I guess twice, technically, since I lived through the assassination twice, thanks for that, though I didn't have as much support the second time. Irrelevant. Nothing abnormal ks happening externally, most of the Groups and Persons of Interest who could inflict this kind of thing haven't been very active recently. The Insurgency would be unlikely to try it again, but even if that wasn't the case, the Insurgency cell nearest to my location got pulled into a pocket dimension to contain their scurvy, which is a uniquely contagious form of scurvy that has only been observed in Insurgents. After the attempt on Twelve's life last December, most of our enemies decided to lay low for a while, for obvious reasons.

All of this is to say that I am confused and vaguely alarmed that this is happening to me seemingly without cause. I don't know what I did, but I desperately need to undo whatever it is as of two weeks ago. If I end up working myself to death because of this, I think I will be happy with that end, because that's what I wanted, but I feel it would be somewhat inconvenient if it happened so soon.

I want to stop feeling and I want to stop having bodily needs. Thankfully Six has been distracted from checking in on here, he would be displeased with how I am speaking. Three and Four also might be. One would be proud, though.

I'm going to stop typing and post this, now. I apologize for writing so many essays today.