#tcw commentary

[hanasnx]

where the fuck did anakin get those credits to give to c-3po for his market run in tcw

i’ve been trying to find solid info about if the jedi get paid by the republic for being part of the grand army. it makes sense, to me, that the jedi (that are part of the war) have to be on payroll in some way and paid with currency they don’t use so they recycle it in some way. donate it to charity, back to the republic’s cause, to the temple, or just let it collect virtual dust.

but all i’ve found is flimsy quora shit i have no idea is sourced from somewhere and it might as well be someone’s opinion saying: “no the jedi don’t get paid because it’s against their code of conduct. they fight in the war because it’s for peace etc.”

i get that jedi in the order do not get paid simply for being in the order. their clothes, their food, their rooms are all provided for them. financed by something i have no idea what.

they have no need for money, which means that the republic could see them as a way to save a penny. but one of the benefits of paying someone to do a job is that if they screw up that job then there’s someone to blame. they’re registered, and they’re held accountable because they’re getting paid to do something and they didn’t complete it.

i know the jedi would never intentionally screw up things, but i’m thinking in the eyes of the corrupt republic.

but it makes sense that the republic is like, “since you’re a literal general, here’s your salary for being a general.” because that’s just the normal general salary ™, and it just so happens that a jedi is now allowed to be a general. what’s the jedi supposed to say? “no i’m just going to volunteer.” i guess that makes sense too?? there are volunteer soldiers in all kinds of historical wars. but if the republic has the funds to employ, would they not use those funds? volunteer soldiers were used when their side could not possibly finance them. at this point, the republic is still very much capable of employing soldiers with pay.

all this and it’s just to help me justify anakin gets paid and keeps money in an account somewhere because he feels like he’s not allowed to use it on himself but uses it on everything else. ship parts, droid repair, you, etc. he’s lowkey a sugar daddy you don’t even realize how loaded he really is bcos he never talks about it.

but he’s also got broke boy energy 😭someone fucking sedate me i cannot stop going back and forth

[anakindoodles]

Happy Star Wars Day! Have A Darth Maul!

[the-far-bright-center]

Re: Obitine and Anidala

I originally wrote this in response to @marvelstars' excellent post on the subject, but I wanted to share it again because it's one of many topics in which I have a differing view from the prevailing fandom perspective.

Above all, it truly drives me nuts how the fandom pits these two relationships against each other. I'm a die-hard Anidala shipper and when I first watched TCW, I was DELIGHTED by the Obitine ship. I saw nothing about it that made me think it was supposed to be viewed as somehow 'better' or more 'ideal' than Anidala. I only ever saw it as a relationship that was more suited to Obi-Wan's character and personality. Not to mention that Padme and Satine are presented as friends who get along well and go on adventures together to right political wrongs, much in the same vein that Anakin and Obi-Wan go on their many military exploits together. The story sets them up as two couples who, in an a more ideal timeline, would be besties who go on double dates together. In my opinion, fandom's insistence on viewing them through the lens of 'which one is a 'morally better couple' is completely missing the point. Personally, I see them as two sides of the same coin.

Since @marvelstars' post was specifically about these two couples as they relate to the idea of commitment to the Jedi Order, I also focused on that angle. Imo, the way Obitine's relationship panned out made sense for their characters and context. Just like Anidala's makes sense for theirs. Obi-Wan and Satine met each other as young adults and had a whole year 'on the run' together before having to say their farewells, whereas Anakin and Padme first meet as children, then re-meet and fall in love over a short span of time, and then suddenly their world is at war and they are facing imminent, possibly indefinite, separation. That's why they marry while still remaining in their respective Jedi and Senator roles, because they feel it might be their only chance to have anything resembling the family they both long for. They understand that they might not survive the war. Whereas Obi-Wan and Satine had first met when Satine's world was already enmeshed in civil war, and then they parted once peace was reestablished and their lives were no longer in immediate danger. And when they meet again during the Clone Wars, it's a wholly different scenario and things have drastically changed (she is the head of a neutral system, he is already established as a general in a war she is opposed to). They are also older, in their 30s, while Anakin and Padme embody the headstrong impetuosity and passion of young love. So it's not as though Obi-Wan and Satine are going to drop everything and enter a committed relationship/marriage in that context in the same way Anakin and Padme do in theirs (when, notably, Anakin is still a padawan and about to be sent to the frontlines to fight in a war for the first time).

As mentioned above, when I was watching TCW I never thought that the purpose of showing both of these relationships in contrasting-parallel to one another was somehow to demonstrate that one was more 'sacrificial' for remaining in the Order and giving up the relationship while the other was more 'selfish' for trying to have both at the same time. Rather, what I feel the story is actually saying is something completely different. It's important to remember that both of these relationships involve a Jedi and the political leader to whom he had originally been assigned as a bodyguard. What is the significance of that? Well, I would argue it's more than just a romantic trope. When I watch Lucas-era Star Wars, I'm always aware that the characters have both an immediate role in-story as well as a symbolic function. Satine, a pacifist, can be seen to represent Peace. Padme, as a Senator, stands for Justice and the rights of the people. And what is it that Obi-Wan says to Luke all those years later? That the Jedi were 'the guardians of Peace and Justice in the old Republic'. This strikes me as hugely significant. Especially if we understand that the Jedi Order had lost its way as of the Prequels-era. While the fandom focuses on which couple is 'better' because of how their relationship affects each Jedi's respective commitment to the Order, I see it from a completely different angle. My understanding is that the Jedi's TRUE purpose (in relation to their role within the Republic) was actually to dedicate their lives to protecting Peace and Justice and those who truly upheld these ideals in the galaxy. Obi-Wan and Anakin's actual callings in life should have been to protect Satine and Padme, whom they loved. Whether this manifested in a more chivalric, courtly love scenario or an outright marriage is immaterial. Rather, what matters is that being a Jedi and dedicating their lives to these women due to their love for them was not incompatible with their role as protectors and defenders of the galaxy, but was in fact the truest expression of it. The so-called 'commitment' to the Order itself was never truly the point, and that's the tragedy of the Prequels-era. Because it was the Order that had by this point forbidden love and family, and which had embroiled Obi-Wan and Anakin and the rest of the Jedi in a war that went against their own principles. A war that, it could be argued, ultimately lead to the deaths of both Satine and Padme, and with them Peace and Justice—the very values that the Jedi were supposed to protect and serve.

[david-talks-sw]

Picture a sculptor.

He sculpts an animal... and it was meant to be an elephant for a kids zoo, but because of the limits of his tools at the time, he stopped at the skeleton only.

And it's a great fucking skeleton! It's got that old feel to it, like a Rodin sculpture, but with a modern vibe.

The skeleton even has fans and stuff, and the fans go "we love this badass mammoth skeleton you sculpted!"

And this sort of bothers the sculptor. Because he was going for an elephant, not a mammoth, right?

So when he finally has the right tools, he completes the sculpture, so the next generation of fans can enjoy the elephant...

... and the previous generation of fans, who grew up reading and dreaming about a mammoth for 30 years, they go "wtf". They hate it.

Now, the sculptor takes on an apprentice, who is also a fan.

The apprentice learns the technique, learns how to look at the clay, how to get the right texture... and is able to do all this without going "wtf" because he looks at this elephant sculpture through an anti-establishment lens.

"Yes, it has shorter tusks and almost no hair, but the purpose of the sculpture is to say that it should be hairier, taller and with longer tusks. The whole point is that this elephant is failing to be the mammoth it's meant to be!"

And y'know, it's art! If that’s what this elephant means to him, great.

But once the tools are passed down to him, the apprentice (along with other sculptors) takes some clay and makes the tusks longer, adds some fur, shortens the ears, etc.

Overtime, he makes it a mammoth again.

Of course, most fans are happy again, including many who were introduced to the elephant as kids, because the transition was a slow one, done carefully.

And, hey, it's a nice mammoth!

My only issue is that I grew up loving the elephant, just as it was. I think the elephant was friggin’ great.

But nowadays, whenever the elephant is brought up, it's always through the lens of "it's failing to be a mammoth" rather than what the sculptor said it's supposed to be: just an elephant.

[magnetarbeam]

Sometimes it strikes me as funny that cute little baby Numa from TCW shares a name with Numa Rar from Legends who got like dissolved in acid.

[girlfriendsofthegalaxy]

spent a very soothing forty minutes alphabetizing and labeling the a/v collection. numbered things! anything that was a library discard with an illegible spine got labelled! it all still fits on the one tiny shelf even!

[darth-jess]

The war destroyed the Jedi. Order 66 was simply clearing away the hollow remnant that remained.

obi-wan wondered what jango fett could possibly gain by making an army for the enemy.

then he held a dying clone for the first time. so young his armor was still unpainted. and he realized.

this is how you destroy a jedi.

– empaths do not belong in war zones.

[hanasnx]

i do not think the jedi generals get paid like in any way. the jedi council would also never allow the jedi to receive the money imo. and idk if im remembering correctly but there was this episode in cw about the the banks raising taxes and the republic struggling to gather funds for the clone army? (idk if my brain is making it up but i vaguely remember an episode abt that) and also in the brotherhood book anakin felt bad that he couldn't buy any gifts for padme cuz he was broke! he instead gifted her his padawab braid <3 so no i dont think anakin has any money at all. padme is his sugar mommy and funds all of their dates lololol

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thank you thank you thank you for your input actually

so yes tcw did address the republic running out of money, but that happened within the series. whereas someone, such as anakin, was established as a general before the series took place. during a time where the republic still had funds.

it’s the war itself dragging on that drains the republic’s finances. which we see them tackle as a problem in an episode. what i was more so trying to think out loud on, was when the republic did have funds, that’s when jedi military personnel was added.

i do like the detail of the council being the ones to decide that the jedi enlisted will not be receiving financial compensation for their service.

i don’t know if it was the brotherhood book (thank you for bringing the books into this) but i remember that scene going differently. it wasn’t that anakin was necessarily broke, but he as a jedi he wasn’t allowed material possessions and was sad that he could only gift padmé his padawan brain which he kept. i also remember he made it into a necklace of sorts for her?

that detail, unfortunately, contradicts with his dorm room in tcw. when we take a look inside anakin’s room, we see posters and model ships etc. where did he get those? if they were gifts, why should he be allowed to keep them? they aren’t religious artifacts, or a part of his culture. why should he have them? if they weren’t gifts, how did he buy them himself?

how did obi-wan buy a drink at the bar in aotc when they chased down the bounty hunting shifter?

i like the idea of padmé being anakin’s sugar mommy, and she honestly probably does finance their outings. but what about his room trinkets? did she buy those for him too? again, why was he allowed to keep them as a jedi if material possessions are not allowed?

[anakindoodles]

Back at it again with another DTIYS this time for @/libpaint on instagram

Please click for better quality! and reblog to support artists!

[the-far-bright-center]

In discussions of TCW-Anakin vs. film-Anakin, I understand why some people see them as being incompatible or entirely different portrayals. But whatever problems I personally have with TCW are more to do with certain OOC dialogue lines that I don't agree with, or the overly-contrived situations that TCW tends to force him into just so an episode or scene can function as a 'meta-commentary' on his character or storyline. Believe me, I have issues with specific aspects of TCW's writing for Anakin, but the fact he's more outwardly 'suave' or 'dashing' than some people expected is not one of them. If anything, I see the 'Skyguy' persona as perfectly in keeping with Anakin as portrayed at the beginning of RotS, and I would argue that a great deal of the TCW characterisation is pulled directly from those Battle of Coruscant scenes. TCW Anakin is also heavily inspired by Jake Lloyd's Little Ani in TPM, which, lest anyone forget, counts as FILM-Anakin. Seriously, do people not recall how much swagger and self-confidence little Ani has at the beginning of TPM? (🎵Do you see him hitting on the queen, though he’s just nine and she’s fourteen.’ 🎶 😅) He's a hotshot little ace podracing pilot and he knows it! And in AotC, the only reasons Anakin comes across as more 'awkward' at the beginning is that he's nervous about seeing Padme again after so long. Once he knows for sure she reciprocates his feelings at the battle of Geonosis, the suave, confident Anakin is back! And thus by the time of the Clone Wars, it makes sense that after being a general in the war in charge of many men, he'd have to have a certain level of outward charisma no matter how much inner doubt or turmoil he might be feeling. So, in my opinion, the actual baseline 'persona' for both versions of the character isn't as different as some seem to think. I'm tired of the idea that film-Anakin ISN’T supposed to be seen as ‘cool’ in-universe, just as much as I’m tired of the idea that TCW-Anakin ISN’T supposed to be viewed as a figure of pathos by the audience, either.

Imo, they’re both takes on the same character coming from different angles, set at different stages in his life, and portrayed through different mediums — an animated series heavy on self-aware, darkly ironic humour in a more contemporary style intended to entertain and increase enjoyment of the Prequels-era and its characters. vs. a more serious Greek tragedy with Shakespearean overtones made with old-Hollywood-style sensibilities as part of a mythic six-film saga.

While there are plenty of things that TCW gets wrong about Anakin (see my 'TCW discourse' tag for more on that), dismissing him because he is ‘too macho’ seems to miss the mark a bit. Just because TCW Ani doesn’t shed literal tears on-screen doesn’t mean he’s not emotional or emotionally vulnerable. As far as I remember, there's even a scene where Obi-Wan and Anakin discuss the fact that Anakin has trouble keeping his emotions hidden, especially when it comes to his feelings for his loved ones, which is the opposite of the stereotypical stoic, self-reliant 'macho' ideal. And the amount of times we're constantly bashed over the head with dramatic irony about his fate as Vader in that series surely drives home the point that his trajectory is a decidedly tragic one. (The way he cries out in agony in the Mortis arc, 'I will do such terrible things!' gets to me, every time.) Despite his powers and prowess, TCW Anakin is even shown as being physically vulnerable at times, as well — see the Jedi Crash storyline which he spends mostly knocked-out unconscious, the nod to his mechanical arm as a liability in the Zillo Beast and Citadel arcs, and the scene of him futilely struggling like a wild beast before being captured with ropes in the Zyggerian arc, or the fact he gets captured and tortured by Dooku in 'Shadow Warrior'. I see endless jokes about TCW Ani getting electrocuted every other episode, but then fandom uses this to fuel the dismissive view of him as just some dumb himbo instead of understanding that this, too, is supposed to add to the character's pathos.

Likewise, fandom claims that Prequels-Anakin is 'uncool' and 'cries all the time', which is simply not true. As noted above, film-Anakin banters, jokes, laughs, makes daring jumps out of speeders, does bold piloting moves, is in fact an imposing duellist, and so on. Sure, his character is not supposed to be seen as aspirational (obviously!) and the most memorable and dramatic moments of the latter two Prequels films feature him in the midst of extremely intense emotions. But the oft-repeated view of him as 'uncool' completely ignores the fact that by the time that RotS starts, film-Anakin is supposed to be a well-known and widely-admired charismatic general, aka the Hero With No Fear, who is viewed as almost singlehandedly saving the Republic. The audience may be privy to Anakin's inner struggles with his fear of loss, but in-story he is supposed to be seen as THE golden boy of the Jedi Order and the Republic. The RotS novelization frequently mentions that Anakin has 'dash', 'boldness', and a 'presence' 'like the Holo-Net hero that he is'. It literally says he's the best at what he does and he KNOWS it. He's not just supposed to be an awkward idiot in the way some people seem to perceive him solely based on certain scenes in AotC. Rather, he's supposed to be shown as falling from a 'great height'. By the time of RotS, film Anakin has just as much swagger and self-confidence in his role as General Skywalker as he does in TCW. Just because that side of him is not the main focus of the film doesn't mean it's not supposed to be there.

[gffa]

You know why the Jedi are right in this scene? Because it's literally how the Force works, this moment is undivorceable from the very basic worldbuilding fact that: The Force works based on their emotions. That is part of everything to do with the Force in the movies, that is the very first layer of the foundation of how it works! If they use the Force while they're afraid, that is straight up a path to the dark side, that's not just what the Jedi say, it's how Star Wars' worldbuilding functions. “Once you become afraid that somebody’s going to take it away from you or you’re gonna lose it, then you start to become angry, especially if you’re losing it, and that anger leads to hate, and hate leads to suffering. Mostly on the part of the person who’s selfish, because you spend all your time being afraid of losing everything you’ve got instead of actually living. [....] So that is ultimately the core of the whole dark side/light side of the Force.” –George Lucas Fear is the path to the dark side. It doesn't matter if the fear is justified or not, it's not necessarily a moral or value judgement, but it just is how the Force works. So, the scene in The Phantom Menace goes like this: Yoda:  "Afraid are you?" Anakin:  "No, sir." Yoda:  "See through you we can." Mace:  "Be mindful of your feelings." Ki-Adi:  "Your thoughts dwell on your mother." Anakin:  "I miss her." Yoda:  "Afraid to lose her, I think, mmm?" Anakin:  "What has that got to do with anything?" Yoda:  "Everything. Fear is the path to the dark side. Fear leads to anger. Anger leads to hate. Hate leads to suffering. I sense much fear in you." The Jedi are repeating Lucas' explanation almost word for word in this scene, fear leads to anger, anger leads to hate, hate leads to suffering, this isn't what the Jedi decided was how things work, it's how the Force works as decided by the guy who created the Force, they're absolutely, 100% correct about it. And that's why it's important that Anakin isn't acknowledging his fear here, that it's not that he's afraid that's the problem or what the Jedi are saying is the problem--the Jedi express emotion all across the movies! that whole "there is no emotion" thing is NOWHERE in the movies or TCW! that is something Lucas himself never put in ANY of his canon!--but that he won't even be mindful of his feelings. Being mindful isn't immediately purging them, it's acknowledging that they're there, working through them, eventually letting them go. "But it's normal for a nine year old to miss his mother! How can they say he's bad just for--" They're not saying Anakin is bad. Nobody is saying Anakin is a horrible person for missing his mother! Nobody is even saying that Anakin is a horrible person for not being mindful of his feelings! Nobody is saying that it's Anakin's fault that he doesn't have the tools for better emotional regulation! But they are saying that he's not a good fit for the Jedi. And they're right! He's not a good fit for the Jedi! Not one single Council member even so much as implies that this is any kind of judgement of Anakin as a person or that he's bad for it! They're saying he doesn't have the rock solid foundation that a Jedi needs because that's how the Force works--and they're right. Every commentary Lucas ever makes about Anakin's fall is that he didn't want to regulate his feelings, he didn't want to let go of things.

The Jedi never once say or imply that that would make Anakin a bad person or that he's a failure because he didn't magically have things he wasn't taught, but they're saying that it would make him a bad fit for being a Jedi and they can already feel--given that they're psychic space wizards who can sense others' feelings--that he doesn't really want to change. ("He's nine! You can't judge a character at that--" Girl, it's a fairy tale meant to illustrate Lucas' personal philosophies about emotional regulation via fairy tale logic, not hyperrealistic examinations of characters, come on now.)

Which doesn't make Anakin a bad person or that he's in the wrong for being scared and not having the tools to deal with it. The Jedi can say "He's not a good fit for what we need to be because of the way the Force works." and not have it be any kind of condemnation of him as a person. His later actions, once he has the training and support to know better, sure. But nobody's saying the nine year old is at fault. They're saying the nine year old doesn't have the foundation he would need, which it doesn't matter that it's not his fault, it's still quite literally how the Force works, that you need that foundation.

[anakindoodles]

This is like a two month late montyhly prompt fill for Historical AU oops AO3 link for added lore :) x 

[darth-jess]

Literally love them.

Ahsoka was such a wonderful character, she is one of my faves. Hers and Anakin's relationship is such a highlight of Star Wars, and I absolutely think Anakin's relationship with Ahsoka made Padmé be like, "this man would be such an amazing father."

[clownery-and-fuckery]

As promised, my commentary on Hunter.... to the people that like him, im sorry.

Spoiler warnings and the like, this is pretty negative aside from like maybe three sentences?? Feel free to leave you're own opinions on this too ofc !!! >:)

I dont like Hunter.

Actually, that's not entirely true, I liked him in TCW season 7, when he was that silly man who fucked droids around the place, took no shit, and loved his brothers. I like the Hunter who, not putting this nicely, had a personality.

This is not a dig on him as a character, it's a dig on how he was handled, writing wise

Listen, I totally get that the "rugged-man-adopts-a-star-child" trope is popular, and I do LOVE that trope, really I do- I just don't really think it was done that well here? It's bothered me since s1 of the Bad Batch, and I don't think it's going to get any better this season....

My only real problem with the writing inconsistency of Hunter being an older brother of three to "Omega this, Omega that" and while I agree childcare is SUPER difficult at the best of times, Hunter had four brothers who were equally capable of taking care of Omega, too. It just never sat right with me that taking care of her became his ENTIRE personality

Hes a soldier, who despite being completely out of his element, had a routine he strictly followed for the whole war. Yet he seemed to completely forget about that ?? Stressed or not stressed, that worn in routines and LIFELONG LESSONS should not have left his head as quickly as they seemed to.

The most obvious and frustrating example of the oversimplification of Hunter's character is with Crosshair. I cannot even BEGIN to describe my anger when it comes to Hunter and Crosshair. It mainly stems from the way he just FORGETS his brother is with the Empire. Conveniently never bringing it up unless someone else did it first.

As the oldest sibling and squad leader, I personally think Hunter should have been the one to bring him up. It should not have had to be specifically mentioned by another character for Hunter to discuss it. He loves his brothers, he loved Crosshair, broody or not, he should have brought it up AT LEAST once, imo.

We also see this complete disregard for Crosshair AGAIN in s3, now that we have seen Hunter looking for Omega and not ONCE mentioning Crosshair. Has he forgotten that they were originally going to find Crosshair??? That they never actually FOUND their brother ??????? Annoyed me so much, tbh.

What else annoyed me was the singular language he used during the whole episode. "She's part of our squad." "Hemlock took SOMEONE from us." He's completely and utterly disregarding the OTHER TWO SIBLINGS that the Empire took away from him !!!!! It genuinely frustrates me so much.

I know I'm DEFINITELY nit-picking here, but even when Hunter looked to Tech's goggles, it was in a "He should've been here to do this." Way, not a "He should be here." Way. That's his brother, who died looking for another that Hunter has forgotten.

Hunter's tunnel vision is probably one my least favourite things about the Bad Batch, if I dare even MENTION that- and I love this show. It means so much to me, but I just can't handle this particular part of it...

I have so SO much anger directed towards the treatment of Hunter by the writers. I want the Hunter who was devoted to his WHOLE family, who fought for ALL of them, who would have NEVER allowed Crosshair to leave in the first place. Give me that Hunter back.

(Saying this- I do not mind Hunter and Omega's father/daughter and brother/sister relationship !!! I do really enjoy it- in small amounts. The fact that Hunter became nearly an extention of Omega really just- threw me off his whole character, really)

I specifically pick to ignore this when I'm making anything. Hunter has been a sergeant of three idiots(named endearingly) for the entirety of the war. One child who wanders around should not have taken up 100% of Hunter's attention, ESPECIALLY when he was surrounded and supported. It just bothers me, idk

Anyway, thats my rant !!! Back to some positives soon, promise !! I just had to get this off my chest, it's been BOTHERING me.

[jedi-enthusiast]

Ok, I know I haven't been very kind about Anakin in my posts lately but like...I'm rewatching TCW while I'm writing and it's literally insane how many times Anakin just...doesn't give a shit about his men and/or fellow Jedi.

Like he consistently makes decisions that get his men killed and you can't even defend it as "he tried his best, but that's war" because nine times out of ten he's either disobeying orders or ignoring the input of someone else saying "this is a bad idea/this is gonna get people killed/we need to do something else."

Like Anakin will literally go out of his way to disobey orders, for literally no reason, and get his men killed.

Not to mention that he shows absolutely no concern for them except for very select situations, and if Padme (or sometimes Ahsoka) is involved then you can bet your ass he doesn't give a shit about his men.

Oh, Rex is also stuck in that lab and dying of some incurable disease? YOU WOULDN'T HAVE KNOWN IT FROM ANAKIN'S COMMENTARY!!!

It's just...it's very frustrating rewatching TCW because now I'm actually seeing seeing his actions and I want to hit him with a metal pipe.

[darth-jess]

Poor Anakin, because he'd honestly just be so concerned with what Padme thought. Anakin is the ultimate victim of everything, and yet he always manages to find a way to blame himself. Even as Vader, when he's blaming the whole world around him, he knows that he is the cause of all of it.

So even though he's literally just endured so much abuse and psychological torture, he'd really only be worrying about Padme, because he's strong enough to handle all that (he really isn't, but he's ignoring it).

And I think Padme would just be annoyed like, "Deal with your trauma, I love you so much and please stop worrying about what I think, I'm in this together with you and I know you'd never betray me"

The funniest (saddest, twisted, concerning) thing ever about that "The Zygerrian arc went different and the Queen didn't die so Padme took matters herself" AU concept, is that Anakin would absolutely panic and act like he just got caught cheating, he would act like in your average sit com "guy got caught cheating".

He would feel all of his blood leaving his head and go onto his feet to start running because he would be like "HONEY, I CAN EXPLAIN, is not what you think, no wait i'm so sorry i'm sorry she's nothing to me I swear"

And everyone else, like, even Miraj are side eying, everyone but Anakin is tremendously aware of The Horrifying Situation, even fucking Jar Jar would be like "Anakin yousaa wearin a damnsa shock collar, what the hell yousaa talking about"

But nope, Anakin is there fighting for his life trying to keep his marriage and insisting it's sacred for him. All while Padme and whoever else she dragged there (is it Bail? Surely it was Bail) are trying to politically slap Miraj.

And then, of course it becomes a fight and Padme is ready for murder because she always is anyways, but Anakin is there still going like "Is not what it looked like", as he's saving Bail from a falling chandelier.