#tbh idk the context of anything
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i’m having a panic attack at work bc my coworker keeps like. saying directed stuff to me about someone else on ADA and then directly after she went on a rant about how her mom is ridiculous for getting upset because she has cysts in her breasts and kept saying she must want cancer and be excited to die because she’s scared
#😛😛😛😛😛#so foul#context: i had an almost 20lb cyst/tumor that they thought was cancer for 2 months#i’m on ADA for one day off a week rn + some other stuff bc it damaged my other organs and i had surgery and they removed my ovaries#i have fibro and it made it flare up really bad + i’ve been suicidal bc of the change in my hormones and the being told i had fuckign cancer#like. it’s not just for silly stuff and she’s made me CRY before and i just didn’t like. say or do anything bc im a coward#idk how to deal w this tbh
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No you don't understand, Anne and Marcy third-wheeling Sasha during the dinner episode (and Sasha third-wheeling herself during battle of the bands) is so important to me. Anne and Marcy have come so far having left Sasha behind. They're happy and confident and strong and closer than ever, all because they were finally free. Because Sasha wasn't there to stunt their growth. Despite how much they love Sasha and how much they don't want to admit the distance helped them, it's true: Anne and Marcy were both victims of a toxic friend and they're learning to move on together. Ik it sounds like I hate Sasha because whenever I write about her I make her out to be a massive piece of shit but that's because... she kinda was! And I love her for that! I love these three, I love their story and their drama and toxicity (I was soooo happy when it was revealed Marcy wasn't as great as she initially seemed like - yes! The CONFLICT is CONFLICTING). Like yes marcanne is my obsession, I have marcanne brain worms, but I think one of the reasons marcanne works so well is because of Sasha. Their past, present and future with her have such a huge impact in Anne and Marcy's relationship with each other and with themselves. You can't separate these three and I love it, how easy it is to ship two of them without making it weird by leaving the third one behind (ironically, Sasha the Character is included by leaving Sasha the Person behind).
Marcanne to me is about two childhood friends living in a toxic situation healing together after leaving, only able to fall in love now that they are free and more comfortable with themselves and each other. They couldn't fully connect with each other before - not really. Anne didn't see the importance of listening to what Marcy had to say nor did she take it too seriously, and Marcy was simply not in contact with real people in the real world at all. None of this was Sasha's fault entirely, but she did third-wheel Marcy and she was possesive with Anne and was just a generally terrible influence on her, while reminding Marcy that, well, she didn't really matter all that much to anyone. Removing Sasha from the equation is not enough but it's a necessary step towards knowing each other better and the fact that they so easily became closer than ever just shows their eagerness to be together for real this time. Marcy's increased confidence and Anne's newfound empathy and admiration for her friend wouldn't have been possible with Sasha's domineering influence present. If they were to fall in love, it'd be because Sasha wasn't there to stop it.
I imagine that, once she finds out, she'd be furious, but mostly just devastated. Her friends only found love once she was gone. As if they think they'll be better off without her.
#amphibia#marcanne#anne boonchuy#marcy wu#sasha waybright#marcanne meta#my posts#i saw a lil drawing one time. it was anne and sasha kinda swordfighting#and anne was protecting marcy like holding her in one arm while pointing her sword at sasha w the other one#but it was like a sketch and in a screenshot alongside like 6 other drawings without links or credit or anything#but from the context of the post I thinkkkkkkk it may have been a doodle made by someone who worked in amphibia??#if that's the case I'd love to know. because i'd love to draw it#idk if I feel comfortable stealing some other fan's fanart idea tbh#but that tiny pixelated little thing was so adorable! i can't get the image out of my head#the CONCEPT of Anne defending Marcy from Sasha! a whole swordfight right there!#only believable if marcy is like injured or something ofc because she'd just try to like intervene to keep the peace. or escape. or try to#immobilize sasha peacefully#but if she's half-conscious or injured or something#(NOT inconscious because i want her to see the fight happen 👀)#oooooh boyy#anne choosing marcy over sasha! sasha realizing they REALLY are more important to each other than she is to either of them! marcy realizing#theres no hope for their friendship because sasha never wanted what was best for all of them and didnt really want her and anne to be happy#i needed a real marcy-sasha confrontation so bad i was so sad we didn't get one 😭 mostly I want marcy to realize sasha was horrible to her#maybe she's in denial maybe she's holding back tears repeating over and over again that sasha is their friend while anne softly tries to#talk to her. to make her see both she and sasha treated her like she was nothing. to make her understand she didn't deserve that#until marcy finally breaks and begins to cry ;-;#i have a whole fanfic in my head you do not understand
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jjk manga spoilers. I’m trying to find that recent interview (?) with gege but not sure where it is or if what I heard was accurate. It was something about not developing or doing much with Tsumiki’s character, which was also my biggest issue with the Culling Games arc
#I have issues with other things. mainly sporadically in the chapters since Yuki’s death#but everything with Tsumiki pissed me off#so I’m interested in hearing what Gege thinks was the issue or why it was released like that#with a lot of manga it’s almost Always partially from the terrible shonen weekly release schedule and bad treatment of artists#(not to make it seem like gege wasn’t in control of writing choices. those were things he decided to publish. it’s just context)#ugh I don’t even know if what I saw was true#I also saw somewhere that gege ‘confirmed’ nobara’s death at some exhibition#but tbh that’s. not anything new in the slightest idk why I saw some trending tweets about it#ever since the gojo time skip I’ve given up at her. the chance for her to magically return was almost nonexistent anyway but yknow
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should i read jjk is it almost done
#i watched the#anime#and the movie#except um#i might have to restart#bc i thought geto was#that villain#yk#i mixed up#so many characters#i mixed up the whole story and#have read spoilers#all out of context#my knowledge on jjk is so warped and choppy you all would laugh at me#like i know everyone who dies but i dont know who they are#i googled it#kenjaku ?#i thought geto was that#i thought he didn’t die or something#tbh i’m confused just writing this#and i don’t understand anything#anyways should i restart it & read it ???? what do u all think#do u like it is it good#jjk spoilers#although idk if there’s any spoilers 😭 i am so messy about jjk#*scratches head*
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Introductions ✨✨
Hey! I'm Coriander. It's not what I go by in my other blogs on here but I want to keep things a bit more separate, at least at first. This is gonna be a long one (sorry) so I'm adding a cut.
I'm exploring Hellenic polytheism, and have only recently started, but it's something I've been considering, in a way, for over a year. I don't have a big, intense story that marks the beginning for me; I didn't necessarily feel a personal, spiritual connection to any of the deities from the time I was a young child in the way others describe, and I haven't had an intense experience that marked the beginning of my path.
I've always felt drawn to Greek mythology, though. I have a distinct memory of laying on my stomach on the floor of the school library in 3rd or 4th grade, reading a picture book about Hades and Persephone. It kept my attention the way others - even Egyptian mythology, another major interest - didn't. I, of course, had the classic queer kid experience of being super into the Percy Jackson series for a while, but my interest in it predated that. The specific deities I've been drawn to have changed somewhat as I've grown up, and they definitely shaped some of my interests. But delving into them again has helped me see connections that weren't explicitly connected to Greek mythology. I felt drawn to Athena growing up, for example, and my love of owls was definitely shaped by that. Even though that has settled into the background somewhat, that connection has persisted in things like my knitting and desires to dye yarn and learn how to weave (side note: I associate crochet more with Apollo, actually, despite it also being a fiber art). I felt connected to Artemis and Persephone as a kid, but that waned as I got older, discovered I was trans, and began my transition. I've felt connected to Hestia and her quiet hearth-keeping since I learned about her: I've always strived to make myself & my space safe and welcoming for others, and being told I succeeded in that is one of the best compliments I've received. But my interests in the morbid (ex Pompeii & the Paris catacombs), psychopomps, rocks & minerals, and keys weren't explicitly related to Hades. Some of the connections didn't click until I started to look into him more seriously about a year ago. I was an artist and had interests in writing, poetry, singing, and playing instruments long before it actually clicked that all of those fell into Apollo's domain, as I associated Athena far more with visual arts as a kid. I also didn't realize that he & Artemis cover diseases (another long-running interest) until very recently. The concept of xenia, too, was something I grew up with to some extent, even though no one called it that. My father modelled it to my siblings and I; I even learned about it within the context of ancient Greece at some point growing up and it stuck with me, despite not knowing the name.
I grew up Mormon, and was incredibly devout until college, when the pandemic forcibly separated me from that environment and I not only discovered that I was queer in several ways, but realized that the Church 1) wasn't safe to stay in and 2) wasn't actually true (which came later, when I started to get over my fear of reading "anti-Mormon literature"). During that period between those two realizations I got into tarot and using plants and crystals for their correspondences (two other interests growing up), as well as using rocks to ground myself. At that time, I considered myself a "liminal Mormon", and was reaching out to Heavenly Mother specifically via tarot. But as it set in that Mormonism specifically, and Christianity generally, wasn't for me, I got more and more interested in modern witchcraft separated from the belief system I was raised in.
It never quite felt right, though. The constant need for protections and doing something "the right way" lest things backfire and you invite the wrong thing into your home, or hurt yourself, or others, or or or, made my anxious & scrupulous brain go into overdrive. I wasn't even sure I believed in it spiritually, or if I was just interested in it from a mindfulness standpoint, and staring down the barrel of comically high piles of research without knowing where to start was exhausting. The concept of dual deities, the Divine Masculine and Divine Feminine, put a bad taste in my mouth (which bled over into Persephone for a while because she and Hades are often used to symbolize those archetypes- sorry Persephone). But, not wanting to listen too much to my discomfort (since part of it may have been, and probably was, prior conditioning), I pushed ahead and actually completed one ritual that had all of the steps - cleansing, representations of the four elements and directions, etc. - and was very carefully designed to leave room for growth and change. It represented the start of my path. I still have the jar I made during the ritual, though I'm still trying to figure out what to do with it.
Around that time, I was considering whether or not to work with deities- specifically Hades, as that was who I felt the most drawn to at the time. The idea interested me, but I wasn't sure if it was from an academic or spiritual angle. I'd really only seen deity work from a modern witchcraft/neo-pagan perspective which, again, didn't sit right with me. On top of that, I wasn't quite ready to let go of Christianity even though I already functionally had, and was terrified of doing something "wrong" and getting, for lack of a better term, sent to (figurative) hell. I decided to do a simple "yes/no" tarot pull and got about the clearest "no" you can get: a reversed Ace of Swords. So I decided to let it rest and that, if I ever felt drawn to it again, I could re-approach the topic.
So, for over a year, I didn't touch it. Continuing with witchcraft after the ritual didn't feel right, either, so my altar collected dust while I tried to sort out my spirituality (or lack thereof). I settled on "I don't know and that's okay" and left it at that, trusting that when the time came, and I had more energy and mental space, that I would be able to start looking into things again.
I never truly stopped thinking about the idea of deity work/worship, though. It was always in the back of my mind. I figured it was because of the way I was raised and tried to sever my idea of spirituality from how I was conditioned while I worked through my religious trauma, got on anxiety medication, and learned more about myself and how I interacted with the world (including that I have both ADHD and autism, something that surprised no one).
Recently I talked with a witchy friend about my thoughts on divinity and what is or isn't out there (neither of us were sure but we both felt like there was something), and that conversation gave me the button I needed to start looking into paganism again. I realized at work a week or two later that I could just look up the different paths of paganism (a term I'd recently heard that hadn't clicked before then) and see if there was one that did fit. The first site I found not only had a clear, concise explanation for belief systems I hadn't knowingly come across before, but it touched on Hellenic polytheism and gave a recommendation for someone to watch to learn more about it. And unlike the sharp knot in my chest that warned me away from attending BYU, and going on a mission, and delving further into modern witchcraft as I'd been introduced to it, learning about Hellenic polytheism felt right. It was heavy and grounding and like home. Many of the issues I'd had with other neo-pagan systems - the constant vigilance & protections & concerns over trickster spirits, for example - simply didn't exist there, or were approached very differently. I still had a mental block about it, though, and realized it was because of that tarot pull a year prior. So I did another one, and got a clear "Yes, jump right in. We're waiting for you". And that's where I've been since which, granted, hasn't been for very long. I've felt especially connected to Apollo and Aphrodite recently, who I believe reached out in a different tarot pull recently - using the same card, actually - which is interesting because while I've appreciated different ways Aphrodite has been depicted, I haven't felt very connected to her in a way I realized was her until recently. It makes sense, though- I got into my first relationship around the same time I did that ritual, and not only are we still together a year later, but a trinket I used to ground myself during those first few months is also pretty directly associated with her. I'm planning on adding it to her altar/shrine area as soon as I find it (it's also still amongst the moving wreckage).
But anyway, hi! If you read this far thank you for taking the time out of your day to do so. If anyone has recommendations for books or other educational resources, or discord servers/other online forum-esque communities, please feel free to share. I've been enjoying looking through the tags and getting a feel for the community here, too; hopefully I'm here to stay.
#one thing ive *really* appreciated is the “sin doesnt exist” thing. its something i realized i'd actually manage to mostly unlearn#by the time i was learning about cleanliness in a helpol context which was nice#in conclusion: im more sure of my spiritual path than i was several weeks ago which was nice#*is nice#and it's also nice having the space to try and let go of having to *know* what's going on in a cosmic/afterlife sense. i dont need to know#and that's *fine*. it's chill. its alright.#hellenic pagan#helpol#my post#coriander says#hellenic polytheism#hellenic polythiest#also: maybe hot take but i disagree w/ the concept of sex causing miasma. maybe in the sense of 'you should do more cleansing than usual#before making an offering' b/c yeah. its messy and there are bodily fluids involved. but it seems so wildly different#from the other causes of miasma & feels pretty purity culture-y tbh. maybe it#*it's just a holdover from the 'breaking the law of chastity is a sin next to murder' shit & i'll feel differently later. idk#christianity cw#mormonism cw#uh. i think that's it. lmk if i need to cw tag anything else but there's nothing glaringly obvious#*nothing else
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Massive hater moment: I liked Pastras Jeff the killer rewrite until the reveal that Jeff was essentially fucked up in the head his whole life. The born sociopath/psychopath trope just feels mean to me as a schizo, but is also pretty boring. why is it less impactful for the derangement of a character to come from trauma? It honestly feels less sanist to take the edgy approach of the original, even if both play into stigma at the end of the day the latter feels less cynical.
#been thinking on this for two months#text post#man idk#I used to like pastra in general but not anymore tbh#they haven’t done anything I just don’t like his vibe#// out of context#jeff the killer#actually schizospec#actually psychotic#actually schizophrenic
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🐺🐱| Something, something, ominous lore.
#oc#oc art#ocs#idk how to explain this but basically this is part of the worst arc I’ve ever made#oc angst#it’s more bittersweet than anything tbh#at least without the full context#when will I give context? who knows…#tenn’s ivan#tenn’s daniel
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deciding (and realizing based on the way i write and think abt it) that no matter what bellum is not making it out of swabbie rank. he’s put at the lowest rank of whatever hierarchy linebeck decides to adhere to no matter what, no matter the au. bellum can be practically a stowaway or romantically involved with the captain but he is swabbie while link made it to first mate in a handful of months and while being like twelve. bellum gets the mop. to humble him.
#only fair that the minor demonic god is swabbie. cant give him too much. tags are a mess on this one btw#anyways secret criteria for being first mate is autism. you gotta be autistic to have actual authority on that ship#…..link would have some flavor of authority in post ph then. i need to thinm on that#salty talks#fuck uhhhh#post-ph#bellum#forgot what i was talkjg abt with this tbh. like what the context was#i know i was thinking abt how linebeck always refers to human bellum as a swabbie or some other low rank in the shipfic#GOD im sl fucking bad a mobilee typing normally i fix typos n shit and im sojng some ln the fly but twice now ive typo’d and instead#writtien ‘fuck’ instead if some other word. also im tired ig but god i hate typing on mobile so fuckint much#<- longest ive gone without bothering much to fix typos. hate it here (on my phone) anyways. i cant remembee the wider context to this#idk what rank damien would technically be. he helps with repairs and technically everyone does swabbie stuff#tbh with how linebecks ship is being swabbie probably isnt too bad aith how ive figured hes extremely loose with it n does everything#i thinm i wanted to say smth ph related and came up with this#the mobile typos frustrate me so bad rn its exacerbated by. something. but i kinda fucking hate it its not really funny or anything#also the mess of accidentally hitting the nimbers button and switching the keyboard. god. lol#anyways. squid on swabbie duty for forever sucks to suck man shouldnt have killed all those people. whatever
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You're laughing. You just exposed your necromancy by raising a bunch of corpses, a woman we just watched get brutally murdered has crawled out of the trash chute like the monster from Grudge, and you're laughing.
#the feychild writing shitposts#just more shitposts of my writing#I remembered this because I saw another version of the “you're laughing” post kinda but not really similar to the scene that happened here.#Idk I really want to make the necromancer's power being /necromancy/ a surprise just like in the OG story#but considering just how much I ramble here...#it's very unlikely that'll be the case haha.#Esp because the story this is from won't be written for soooo freaking long omg.#So I'm kinda at a point of “eh why not talk about out-of-context spoilers without connecting anything to the actual story?” haha.#I loved this scene so much tho omfg haha.#I can't believe I originally wrote it when I was such a young writer tbh. It was done shockingly well despite the writing being so bad.#Originally I was going to make this shitpost from the necromancer's POV and all “you're laughing even tho this is actually terrifying?"#but then I remembered they were canonically laughing for a bit (brokenly/from anger) in this scene and pivoted to this instead haha.#cw murder mention#cw death#cw corpse#necromancy#fantasy horror#necromancer#high fantasy#horror fantasy#cw body horror#cw horror#shitpost#sillyposting#text post#spilled ink#creative writing#writers on tumblr#writeblr#writing
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i don't know why im so obsessed with chisato lately, i just feel like she gets it (insane)
#i mean so does sayo tbh#this is maya's insane head canon corner but i feel like both of them probably feel like a lot of their desires are inherently bad you know#for different reasons of course#but in effect i really can't imagine chisato as someone who could like go on a date with a girl without like deeply examining herself#and trying to figure out how she's the monster you know#and sayo is like omg sayo has so much going on#she probably is like half i don't deserve anything and half i deserve everything#in a non sayohina scenario how do you think sayo would react to hina getting a girlfriend first because like#idk it would be crazy inside her mind especially if it's someone sayo likes right which i could totally see hina not realizing#and then herself feeling like absolutely garbage for hurting her sister again when she kind of didn't do anything wrong#ah this ran away from me idk#in a sayohina context things would also be insane but there are more qualified users out there to talk about it#im not really much of a sayohina shipper cause i think they should like be miserable forever and constantly step on eachothers toes#like metaphorically i mean
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btw if you ever wanna really look at the beauty of color theory & the importance of context in colors i really like how edge's armor communicates "black" pretty well imo and fluff's jacket communicates "purple" when this is the difference between both colors
#i THINK i did an ok job at making edge's armor easily interpreted as black anyway#unless everybody else has been seeing him as purple this entire time without saying anything#but i didnt notice how close these two purples actually were until a couple minutes ago tbh#thats one of my favorite parts of non-tumblr-joke color theory tbh. idk quite what it is that makes edge's look black but its so cool to me#ik its Something to do with context but their outfits have suuuuper similar color palettes too. down to the exact same shade of red even#they both even have super similar value contrast. i guess maybe saturation is just that powerful#all that being said realizing how close & connected their designs wound up is making me emotional for reasons you dont need to worry about👍
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Why did I see multiple people bring up “earth duo” on twitter today like can we not 😭🤮
#tbh I doubt anyone is seriously considering using it again at least I hope not#I don’t even remember the contexts of the posts but like#I say awesamdream even when I mean /p soley bc idk their duo name#it’s just not that deep#also earth duo just sucks as a duo name objectively#it dosent showcase anything about them and dnf is simply too iconic#dnf is that bitch#<- is not even a big dnfer it’s jsut the damn truth#ok that’s your one shipping discourse post of the month just no earth duo kay thanks#let that bitch die#.___.
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thinking about how when wus was released i didn’t hear the album until i got the cd in november that year but when tmia was released i heard it first at midnight day of release and then four more times before seeing them at wembley that day
#for context i’ve been an atl fan since 2017 bUt i was a casual listener until i saw them for the first time in 2021#from then on i’ve been hyperfixated B)#idk why it didn’t cross my mind to listen to wus on streaming tbh#i just wasn’t that bothered back then#i know - shocker#i’m glad i came around#i love them more than anything now#all time low
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2023 reads // twitter thread
The Surviving Sky
adult scifi/fantasy about a fracturing married couple who live with the last of humanity on a floating city powered by arcane science
Iravan is a privileged and powerful architect, who keeps them afloat with his plant magic
Ahilya has no magic - and is deeply interested in studying the magical megafauna which are the only thing that can survive the cataclysmic jungle on the ground
#The Surviving Sky#aroaessidhe 2023 reads#ok concept; vibes; immaculate#(also they're yaksha not megafauna but. for context that's not an innacurate description)#it didn't Quite go in ways i wanted in some ways#me at the dudes first POV: bro what are you ON ABOUT#fr tho the description of how the plant magic works is super interesting. it's all like. idk reaching into the quantam universe and changing#the way things Exist. or something. it all sounds very complicated#one thing that kinda bugged me is how it seems to be like. there is no (non-plant) life on earth at all and im like???#there’s no way there’s NO life on earth???? ya heard of bugs????? the concept of a jungle existing with nothing survivng except megafauna#doesn’t make sense to me… i mean it is all very magical plants and tbh them saying there's nothing else doesn't mean that's true#however i couldn't stop thinking about it#I do feel like it keeps having the dude do something terrible that she should leave him before. and then explaining why it wasn’t that bad /#he had no choice….when she doesn't really do anything bad to him back........idk. i mean we're aware he's pretty shitty but also?#DIVORCE HIMMMMMMM#i understand the plot couldn;t have gone in the way it did if she did but also DIVORCE HIMMMMM#regardless i do think the concept and worldbuilding is all very cool and im sure i'll pick up the next one
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You're such a crybaby lmao
What is this even about
#legit.#like I am a huge complainer vent poster I admit it but I cannot think of anything recent this could be referring to???#I can't even be offended because I have no idea what the context is for this.#tbh this is comical to me#I guess if they were looking thru my original post tag it could be something older or just an overall observation rather than smthn recent#and I'll likely never get answers since I doubt this is someone who (still) follows me and since it's on anon they won't get notified#ThornShadow.said#ask#anon#edit: looked thru my recent posts and I liveblog watching movies more than I complain recently and all that is DROWNED out by scammer asks.#but also maybe more posts are reading as serious venting than I mean as such? cuz I sillily post about minor annoyances all the time#IDK maybe my anti advertising post got some new notes and it's about that.#cuz I've been called all sorts of similar stuff over that post.
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Ok the confession I remembered seeing was on the mcyt confessions blog instead that makes sense lol. I just wanted to look at it again. The feeling of seeing someone finally point out that treebark could be seen as unhealthy and being like “omg someone finally said it-“ and then the notes are all just “what? anon is being so weird they’re literally the healthiest ship in the entire series” like HE CHOPPED OFF HIS HEAD??? WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT???
#I’m NOT saying that treebark was toxic as hell. but why is it being PRAISED for being HEALTHY#I think it’s a beautiful ship that has lots of tragedy and is very sweet and other great adjectives.#but after Martyn’s AITA stream and there was the one about him chopping off Rens head I sort of had an ‘oh’ moment#cuz my response to that AITA (remember we had to pretend we didn’t know the context) was YOU ARE IN A CULT GET OUT#and then I rewatched flower husbands 3L pov and we all know the banner scene but did we all forget that in that very scene#Martyn acted EXACTLY the way Grian would act when Scar talked to people?#ppl forget that Ren made Martyn chop off his head which was VERY traumatic for him like he STILL isn’t over it#and let’s not pretend Martyn is perfect either like. it’s Martyn. DUH.#also idk if it was bad per se but I mentioned that without context it seemed like Ren dragged Martyn into a cult but in LL Martyn actually#brought Ren into some weird shadow cult like LMAO. yeah these guys are too dramatic for their own good.#aough. I got goosebumps thinking about these two cuz it’s soo good. do NOT strip the ship of its FLAVOR#like I said. it’s not like straight up toxic or anything but it’s ABSOLUTELY NOTT ur perfect wholesome healthy couple.#I would call them a tragedy tbh. also I miss Ren being in the series. there should be a new season just for him to be in it
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