#tbh i was very excited. i tried to google it before but i never got a real answer shockingly | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

etherrreal · 4 years ago

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“the things you do for charity”

Pairing: kenma x gn!reader Genre: fluff Summary: kenma's always been a private person, but it was getting increasingly harder to keep his partner off his streams while you live together; so, he decided to join his two loves together for a 24-hour charity stream extravaganza. Word Count: 3,408 Warnings: some swearing, i suppose there are some spoilers from the manga about adult kenma's job? A/N: i'd give my left tit to play some minecraft or mario kart with kenma tbh -Luna

Kenma's career as a popular streamer was one of the many facets of him that shocked you when you’d started dating two years ago. The two of you had first met in an Animal Crossing discord for your city meant for trading and making friends.

After you had gone over to his island to adopt Raymond from him, he let you keep all of your Nook Mile Tickets with the stipulation that you kept in contact with him to "give him updates" about how the cat villager was doing in his new home. His dorky way of trying to flirt with you was what made you pursue him in the first place, and somehow it had led to a very fulfilling relationship.

It was revealed early on that he was a streamer, but he never expanded on it regarding the actual numbers. Curiosity got the best of you one night, and you decided to google him. Besides also learning that he was a YouTuber, you found yourself in awe at the numbers he managed to accumulate across all of his social media.

And if that wasn’t enough, he was also apparently the CEO of his own business.

Once you moved in together around the one-year mark of your relationship, you got to properly witness the amount of work put into streaming and maintaining a social media presence. This also meant that you got to read the wild comments that were left on all of his platforms–and see the occasional surprise nude picture whenever he opened up his DMs around you.

Because of this, Kenma sat you down to have a conversation about your potential appearance on his social media. You both decided by the end of it that his audience would get to know that he was in a committed relationship, but you agreed it would be best to not show your face or reveal any identifying information of yours.

It had been a year since having that conversation, and you’d both stuck to the agreement closely. The most his audience had ever seen of you was your hand whenever you refilled his water bottle for him.

Of course, it was hard sometimes, especially when you had to remain extra quiet around the house and refrain from yelling out a 'baaaabe' whenever you needed something from him, but since he had his own soundproof office, it lessened the room for any accidental error.

Overall, you were content with never showing your face to his audience for the rest of his career. You knew how nasty the internet could get because of their parasocial relationships with influencers and streamers alike, especially when they discovered those influencers and streamers had a partner who wasn't them, even if they knew they never had a chance. You weren't sure your skin was thick enough to deal with rabid angry stans.

Which is why it was so shocking when Kenma decided one day to nix the agreement.

You were in your shared bedroom answering some emails when he came in. He was dressed in a baggy hoodie, sweats, and tied-up hair; his typical look for a stream.

After some time, you noticed that he was still standing in the doorway, not saying anything. When you glanced up at him, you found him awkwardly toying with the strands of hair that had fallen out of his bun, looking down at the ground like he was just waiting for you to notice him.

"Is there something you need, baby?" you asked. "You're just standing there all adorably shy."

"Yeah, so, um, I'm going to be doing a 24-hour stream this weekend to raise money for charity."

"Oh, really? Cool! I guess that means I'll be going to bed alone that night," you joked.

"Yeah, I guess. Um..." He started before scrunching up his face like he was uncomfortable with what he planned to say next.

"What is it? Do you need me to stock up on snacks and energy drinks? Just send me a list. I can pick them up tomorrow."

"No, that's not it. I was thinking of making a stretch goal be you coming on stream so we can play Minecraft or Mario Kart or something...I mean, I totally understand if you don't feel comfortable. I could always replace it with something else. I know they've been wanting to see me dye my hair a bright color and dress up like an e-boy, so--"

"Really!?" you nearly yelled.

"What? That they want me to dress like an e-boy? Yeah, Kuroo said it would–"

"No, I mean..." You tried to fight the confused expression that was growing on your face, but your squinted eyes gave you away. "You really want me on your stream? Like face and all?"

"....Yeah, I really want to be able to share this with you. But don't feel like you have to do it just to make me happy."

It was a large ask when looking at the full picture. Kenma had his fair share of fans and "stans" who lacked boundaries, as seen from a select few who visited your home several times this year, or the handful that found you on social media already just from seeing a glimpse of your college ring on the hand wrapped around Kenma's water bottle.

There could be a chance you could receive direct hate on your social media just because you were a person who dated a popular streamer. You would then be in the public eye with little privacy and have a magnifying glass on all of your actions and words. Anything you did would then reflect on Kenma.

What if you messed something up and then Kenma lost viewers? Would they try to cancel you or him for it?

You backed away from all the negative thoughts before you could spiral and looked at the metaphorical 'pro' column.

If you agreed to appear on his stream, you would no longer have to sneak around your house in fear of being heard or showing up in his face cam. You both wouldn't have to feel guilty playing games off-camera with each other because you knew Kenma could be streaming it instead.

And who knew? Maybe his fans would like you. You had to admit, it would be a nice ego boost knowing that you were accepted by so many people.

And, most importantly: you could physically ask him in person what he wanted for dinner instead of texting him and waiting an hour for a break so he could respond, while you sat in the next room, starving, stuck in an endless cycle of wondering whether you should make a snack or if you should just hold off for dinner.

Maybe this was a good idea.

"Okay,” you decided, “I'll do it."

"Oh... alright. Cool." Kenma was trying his hardest not to show how excited he was that you agreed. When he saw the contemplative look on your face, he was sure you would decide that it'd just be too much work and say no. But hearing you agree made him giddier than he would ever admit to.

Despite the cool and collected façade he thought he was putting on, you saw the smile that threatened to break through and the red tips of his ears. You wondered if he felt the same weight being lifted off his shoulders as you did, knowing that, after this weekend, you'd both be finally out as an official couple to the world.

And, of course, the nausea of having to do all of it live in front of thousands of people. No biggie.

Saturday afternoon came and at 12pm sharp, Kenma began his grueling 24-hour charity stream. The bar had an overall goal of $150,000, and it began filling up at a constant pace right from the start. Donations ranging from $5 to $500 were flowing in rapidly, and you were trying your best not to feel nervous.

You both agreed that if he reached $50,000 within 5 hours, you would join him for an hour or two of Minecraft later that night. Part of you hoped that the donations would slow down and plateau for a bit, but when you saw Kuroo had donated $1000, specifically with the message that he hoped to see you on stream soon, you realized that it was a pipe dream.

So, you had to be your own hype person for now, to get prepared to show your face to thousands of people and not disappoint Kenma.

Whether it was the promise of your face reveal or the people who genuinely adored charity, it took only four hours for Kenma to break $50,000.

When he saw the number update live on stream, the viewers witnessed the most amount of expression Kenma had ever shown: eyes wide as saucers, mouth slightly agape, body frozen. You could see the gears struggling inside his head struggling to turn and comprehend what they all managed to do so early on in the stream.

"Thanks so much, everyone, for being so generous today... I guess this means we'll be having my partner on later tonight," he announced. You watched his chat explode with excitement, his special emotes flying in the chat.

You picked up your phone to shoot Kenma a quick text.

[you]:: hope you're ready to put our minecraft beds together in front of thousands of people 😏

Unsurprisingly, he left you on read. But dating him for this long meant you weren't even a little bit afraid of double or triple texting.

[you]:: maybe we can kiss under the light of an exploding creeper 😫

[you]:: or have a romantic walk through our rainbow sheep while a phantom looms overhead 🥰

It was after the third text when you finally saw him pick up his phone to text you back. You eagerly awaited his response, only to cackle when you read it.

[my sugar daddy]:: im going to replace you with hinata as my partner if you dont stop

Instead of annoying him any further, you set your phone to charge on your nightstand and went into the bathroom to get ready for the stream later.

Once you emerged, you picked up your phone to check the percentage and noticed a text from Kenma stating that he'd have you on at 8pm. You decided to spend the time until then cooking up some dinner for the both of you.

It seemed like time flew by because by the time you were done eating your food, it was 7:45pm. Only fifteen more minutes before you were live in front of all of Kenma's supporters. You refilled your water bottle and sat on the couch, staring at the blank T.V. as you practically dissociated from reality until Kenma came out of his office to retrieve you.

You noticed that he looked just as nervous as you did, despite his face not showing it the way yours did. His shoulders were up to his ears with tension, and his hoodie drawstring was pulled almost all the way through due to him fiddling with it.

He turned briefly to you after he brought you into his office, gesturing to make sure you knew to wait until he gave you the cue. He sat down, unmuted himself, and took down the 'away' screen he had for his audience.

This was it. Everything was going to change in literally ten seconds.

"Well, everyone...please welcome my partner, (Y/N)."

You walked cautiously around his large gaming chair and sat next to him in your modest desk chair that he had rolled into the room for the occasion.

Okay, you thought to yourself, now don't fuck this up.

"Hi, everyone."

Nailed it.

There was a painful moment of silence before the stream finally caught up, and you both heaved a sigh of relief when you saw nothing but declarations of excitement. Amongst the 'AHHHs' and spam of emotes were sweet comments about your appearance and how cute you two looked as a couple. You peeked over at Kenma and saw the ghost of a smile on his lips, elated to know that he was just as relieved as you were.

"Okay, let's start with the gameplay while we answer some questions," he said.

The questions and gameplay started out mild; when did you both start dating, how did you meet, who asked the other out first. They even asked a few simple questions about you specifically, like your favorite anime and your star sign. And while you did see a few bans in the chat after some inappropriate questions –no, you will not tell them the color of your underwear– most were easy and simple enough to answer.

Then they started to get a bit spicier.

"Bokutoslefttit donated $69.69 and asked, 'what is your main pet peeve with Kenma?'" he read, muttering a 'wow' under his breath at the username.

"Ooh, how can I be polite when exposing you?" you pondered while beating a cow to death with your sword. "It's probably how loud he gets whenever he's playing games with his good headphones on."

"I don't get loud," he defended.

"Oh yeah, you do. I've had to come in here several times to tell you to shut up like I'm your mother. I did it literally two days ago when you were playing with Lev."

"... Next question."

You rolled your eyes at his lack of comment but glanced over at the chat to pull up a new question. You stifled a laugh when you read, "Girlboss420 asked 'who has a fatter ass, Kuroo or (Y/N)?'"

"I'm not answering that."

"Come oooon, this is a Q&A. Can't have the Q’s without the A’s."

"Nope."

You were about to start reprimanding him for implying that Kuroo's ass was fatter than yours when you noticed he ran past you with a group of pillagers following closely behind. You turned to head into the house but when you opened the door, you noticed it was blocked off by obsidian.

"You are the absolute worst!" you exclaimed.

You made a break for it, sprinting past the shooting pillagers and around to the front of the house. You made it inside with only 2 hearts to spare. You turned, in real life, to Kenma to see him tight-lipped to avoid smiling about his betrayal.

"I'm moving my bed downstairs for the rest of the stream."

You both carried on with the stream without another incident, turning to the chat every now and again to answer some questions. Kenma even apologized to you by bringing home a horse that was named "I'm sorry."

It was about an hour and a half after you sat down when Kenma decided that he needed a bathroom break. Your heart fell to your ass when you realized that you'd be all alone to entertain his chat. You considered saying that you needed to pee as well, if it meant not having the spotlight on you.

Instead, when he got up to pee, you smiled and asked him to bring you back a snack and a refill. Oh, how the turns have tabled.

In the meantime, you decided to scroll through the chat and some of the donations to pick out another question to answer since Kenma was gone. You were initially looking for a funny or vulgar comment when you saw one that had a completely different vibe.

"Kermithateblog donated $25.00 and asked, 'what's your favorite part about being with Kenma?' Wow, that's a really sweet question. Let me think for a moment."

You paused to reflect on your relationship with Kenma over the two years you’d been together. You'd had your fair share of highs and lows like any other couple, but, in the end, you both learned how to work things out so you were both equally as happy in the relationship.

"So, as you guys know, he's a busy boy with streaming, creating content for YouTube, and also being a CEO of his own company, which all takes up the majority of his time," you began. "But when he finally can shut off his screens and crawls into bed late at night, I know that he's 100% there with me at that moment. He is able to give me his undivided attention and make me feel like his love for me comes above his love for gaming."

You gave a pause, trying not to get too emotional. You rarely got the chance to gush about Kenma because you knew how much he hated having attention on him, so if this was going to be your only opportunity to do so for a while, then you were going to take it.

"What y'all don't know is that he is the biggest baby when it comes to cuddling," you laughed. "He is absolutely the little spoon most of the time, and he loves when I stroke his hair and love on him all night. In a weird way, it makes me feel special and loved knowing that he trusts me enough to be vulnerable with me. I cherish the amount of time we have together because of that."

What you didn't know was that he had come back from refilling your water bottle rather quickly and stood outside the doorway to hear your speech. His heart almost burst when he heard your tender words describing how he made you feel. He knew that you rarely got to hear how much those quiet moments at night meant to him because he was guarded with his feelings.

Which is why he started into the room on a mission.

You smiled as soon as you saw him. "Welcome back, babe, we were just talking about--"

He approached you swiftly and leaned down to press a gentle kiss on your forehead. You hardly even got to bask in the moment before he was pulling away, setting down your water bottle as he sat back down with his controller in hand like he didn't just expose to his audience how much of a softy he really was.

It was in that moment when you realized how glad you were that you’d decided to appear on stream because you'd be able to look back at that clip over and over again to relive the intimate moment.

Noon on Sunday came at last. Kenma would finally be free from the prison of his office. Not to mention he could finally get off his ass and stretch.

Between your official appearance on stream and the sign-off, you popped in a few more times to say hello to the chat when you brought him some snacks and drinks. You stayed up through most of the night, although you accidentally napped for a few hours during the dead of night which gave you a little boost in energy.

In the end, the stream was a monumental success. Kenma had even managed to blow past his goal of $150k and make it to over $200k, which meant that he'd be getting the full e-body makeover for his next week of streams.

By the time Kenma came into your bedroom after freshening up and having a small snack, you were already dead asleep with your laptop propped open to show his now offline stream.

He tip-toed around the bed quietly, closed your laptop, pulled the covers up and over your curled-up body, and slipped in himself. As he settled, he felt you shift and grab at his worn t-shirt, opening your eyes slightly just to confirm that it's him.

He pulled you against his chest tightly, his body finally able to relax. He was sure it wouldn't be too long before he completely fell out.

"That was more fun than I thought it'd be," he heard you utter quietly.

"I'm glad you enjoyed yourself." His fingers gently danced across your shoulder blades as you mushed your face into his clean shirt. "I can't believe we raised so much today so quickly."

"I'm so proud of you, baby. You worked so hard on this."

"I also donated $2000 anonymously to speed up the process," he mumbled sheepishly, pressing a gentle kiss on the crown of your head in hopes to lessen the blow of his secret.

It was quiet for a moment, and he wondered if he’d genuinely pissed you off before he felt the vibrations from your laugh against his chest.

"...I can't wait to ruin your hair, e-boy."

Written by: Luna

#kenma x reader #kenma kozume x reader #haikyuu x reader #kenma imagines #haikyuu imagines #kenma x y/n #kenma x you #haikyu x reader #haikyuu!! x reader #hq x reader #haikyuu #haikyuu!!#our writing #kenma fluff #haikyuu fluff #luna writes

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amazingphanisnotonfire-imagines · 4 years ago

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Cheryl//you can’t go through life trying not to get hurt

Request: So can I ask for a cheryl x reader where r does everything to make cheryl happy and just being supportive of her?

hey! i kind of got just a little bit carried away with this. but i think i pulled it back! i hope you like it! also, i know the title is an archie quote but i don’t really care because it fits and i like it! plus, they’re both red-heads so what’s really the difference?

- We know Cheryl hasn’t had the best life

- Her entire family and everything to do with it is tainted

- So for a long while, she thinks she’s tainted to

- And when she meets you

- On a rainy Friday night, sat by Sweetwater River

- With your hair plastered to your face and the brightest smile she’s ever seen

- She knows she has to stay away from you

- Because anybody who can be that happy sat in the pouring rain

- Is somebody too pure for her

- So she turns around and heads back to her car

- Deciding that if she wants to be alone, she can just do it at home

- But then she hears it

- Your voice

- So soft, but so demanding

- And you’re calling her name

- Her name has never sounded so pretty

- Even if it is coming from a complete stranger, who’s staring at such a dark place like its the most beautiful thing in the world

- ‘yea-yeah?’

- Her confidence slips for just a few seconds and its purely down to the way you’re looking at her

- Like she’s filled with magic and wonder and mystery

- A mystery you’re going to solve

- Spoiler alert...you do

- ‘come sit’ You pat the rock beside you and she glances warily between you and it

- It may have stopped raining but that rock is still very wet and she’s wearing a new skirt

- ‘oh come on. live a little’ Your eyes sparkle as you speak

- She eventually concedes and sits beside you

- Now she just has to make sure she doesn’t give too much away

- Never let anyone else in

- Its the mantra she’s been repeating for as long as she can remember

- This time she’s going to stick to it

- Spoiler alert...she doesn’t

- Because thats easier said than done when a pretty girl is asking her questions

- Or just paying attention to her tbh

- So she asks you questions instead

- ‘how do you know who i am?’

- Normally she’d be afraid of a complete stranger who knew her name

- But this time, she’s just curious

- She wants to know who you are

- Why you’re in Riverdale?

- How has a town so full of dark secrets and awful people managed to capture you?

- She’s expecting a long winded explanation about how you just moved from a big city

- Because lets be real, thats the only place she can picture you living

- But instead you just laugh

- Such a light, unexpected laugh

- And now she’s unsure of what to say

- What do you say to that?

- ‘i know a lot about a lot’

- ‘wow’ She mutters

- She couldn’t help it

- She is Cheryl Blossom after all

- She can’t been seen as anything other than a bitch

- But when she see’s the flash of hurt in your eyes

- She can’t help but feel even more like the worst person in the world

- She mumbles a quick apology and looks at the river instead

- ‘its fine.’ You shrug. ‘you’ve been through a lot’

- ‘how do you know?’

- ‘i just do. but you will be okay cheryl, and don’t worry, you could never taint anything. i don’t think you’re capable of even leaving a trace of something bad.’

- She really wants to say something

- But what the hell do you say to that?

- And when she turns to face you, hoping the right words will find their way somehow

- You’ve vanished

- For a split second she thinks you’re a ghost

- Its not the first time she’s had full on conversations with the dead

- But then she hears a thud

- Followed by a groan and a small ‘ow’

- And it makes her laugh

- Like properly laugh

- The first she has in a while

- She watches you stand and give her an awkward wave before actually disappearing

- For the rest of the weekend you’re the only thing she can think of

- By the time Monday rolls around she’s determined to find you

- It can’t be hard

- You’ve got to be a new student

- And Betty gives tours to all the newbies

- She’ll just ask her

- Thats easier said than done though

- She tried looking for her cousin before classes started

- She even came in early

- But no luck

- So she has to wait until lunch time

- And that makes her worry

- By lunch time, you could have been told literally everything about her

- How her brother was murdered by her father

- How awful her mother is

- She was almost assaulted

- She attempted suicide

- And she joined a cult

- Just to name a few

- Riverdale High is a breeding ground for rumours

- Usually created by her

- But they spread fast around here

- When lunch time rolls around, she’s sure you’re going to know how much of a train-wreck she actually is

- Despite all of that though

- Something inside her wills her to ask Betty about you

- She then goes on to describe everything she remembers about you

- Maybe in a little too much detail

- ‘she had sparkly y/e/c eyes’

- ‘and y/c/h hair that framed her face in just the nicest way’

- ‘and her smile...it was wonderful’

- ‘...right. did you get a name?’

- ‘if i got her name do you really think i would be here right now?’

- ‘che-’ Betty is cut off by someone calling her name

- The sound of it making Cheryl feel like she can’t breathe

- She knows that voice

- Even Betty’s name sounds nice when coming from her

- From you

- But hold on

- You’re hugging Betty

- Thats way too friendly for someone you’ve only known for half a day

- ‘hi cheryl’ Your wave is less awkward than it was on Friday night, but your smile is just as cheerful as you look at the red head.

- Okay, now she definitely doesn’t know what to say

- Betty quickly puts two and two together and smirk appears on her lips as she looks between the two of you

- She has known about your small crush on Cheryl for a while

- So she decides to help you out

- ‘what were you saying about y/n’s smile? it was amazing? no! wonderful!’

- ‘shut up betty. i think your boyfriend wants you’

- She’s practically shooing Betty away and she mutters something under her breath but walks away anyway

- Once she’s gone, Cheryl turns back to you and just stares at you

- ‘so, you go here?’

- ‘yep?’

- ‘how long?’ She really doesn’t want to know the answer

- ‘as long as you have’ You don’t seem annoyed when she looks at you

- The opposite in fact

- You kind of look amused

- ‘how have i not noticed you?’

- ‘you’ve been pre-occupied I suppose’

- ‘how can i make it up to you?’

- ‘notice me’

- ‘i’ve definitely already done that.’

- ‘take me to pops then’

- She never wanted to do something more

- But she’s torn

- She wants to say no. To keep you safe from her and everything that come with being involved with a Blossom

- But the way you’re looking at her makes her knees weak and her head dizzy

- So she says yes

- And its the best decision she’s ever made

- At first you take it slow

- She’s been hurt before

- And she’s hurt other

- But something that makes it easier is the fact that you already know everything about her

- Even if you were in the background during most of it

- She’s so excited to get to know you

- One of the first things she learns is how you’ll do anything to make the people you love happy

- Especially her

- She’s quite literally never met anybody like you

- You’re just so supportive of her

- Nobody has ever treated her like that

- So at first she doesn’t really know what to do

- But then she remembers the night you met

- And how you were so kind to her

- Even though she didn’t know who you were

- And she slowly starts to get used to it

- In return she learns how to be more supportive of others

- Something her friends are incredibly grateful for

- To the actual supporting/happy bit because I kind of got a bit carried away

- Whenever she’s sad

- Whether it be because she’s missing Jason

- Her mom/other family members have made an unwelcome appearance in her life

- Someone has been rude to her

- Or she’s just sad

- You will do literally anything and everything to make her smile

- Cuddles? Hell yeah!

- She wants to stay in bed all day? That sounds like an amazing day.

- She wants to watch her favourite film/tv show? Definitely

- ‘where do you keep your dvd’s?’

- ‘what century are you living in? you know there is a thing called the internet.’

- She wants her favourite food from Pops? You’re already out the door

- You’ll go for drives around town while she tells you stories of her and Jason

- Or you’ll let her teach your archery or some other weird hobby she has

- Plus, you’ll tell her all the stupid jokes you know

- Usually she laughs more out of pity than humour

- But it still counts

- ‘sure it does babe’

- And if someone has made her angry

- It doesn’t really take much

- But you’re working on it

- You are 100% behind her if she wants to ruin their life (in moderation)

- You go along with whatever crazy plan/scheme she’s though of that week

- She wants to start a business? Where do you sign? This is the best idea ever

- Steal something from somebody thats wronged her? Where is the best place to buy spy-wear

- Create a little chaos? You’ve already got three ideas planned out you just need her approval

- Its not just silly things either

- She decides she wants to go to therapy (everybody in this town needs it, including Pop). You’ll go with her and wait outside of every single session if she wants you to.

- You usually spend the time googling how to help her (she just thinks you spend the entire time on Instagram)

- She wants to properly cut off her family (with the exception of Nana Rose and the twins). You 100% support her if thats what she wants

- As your relationship grows, so does your support

- She’s literally never felt more loved than when she’s with you

- And you make it a mission to make her feel like this for the rest of her life

- Spoiler alert...you do

support my writing! if you want!

#cheryl blossom #cheryl blossom imagine #cheryl blossom x reader #cheryl blossom x you #cheryl blossom x y/n #riverdale #riverdale imagine #cheryl #cheryl imagine #cheryl x reader

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strawberry-jammers · 3 years ago

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choir and kisses

a niki x reader school au, where there in choir together and have a project to work on. maybe they kiss? maybe

this baisically inspired my school au tbh

masterlist

Niki sat in her choir class, exhausted from her previous class. The kids were just too much to be around and didn't have the mental strength to deal with them sometimes. She opened her choir folder, putting it on her stand.

“Yo niki, you good?'' Wilbur says, sitting down next to her. “I'm fine, but Wilbur, you're not in this class. I thought you were in orchestra.” she answers, looking at the tall man. “I am, I just don't have a class right now so I decided to visit you.” niki nodded. “Oh right, seniors have free hours sometimes.” he nodded at niki’s statement, opening his phone. “Texting sally?” niki asks, making Wilbur blush. “No no I'm not.” niki laughs, turning to the front of the room when the bell rings.

“Alright everyone, we will be doing a group project today! Your gonna do a presentation of a musical and then sing a duet together! Your partners are posted on google classroom.” niki opened her phone, seeing who she was partnered with. Wilbur just sighed, staring at niki. “Mind if i hang with you and your partner?” wilbur asks. Niki nodded. “Yeah its fine. Seems like I'm partnered with your sibling!” wilbur just started laughing. “What are you laughing at?” he calmed down slightly. “It's just that you have the biggest crush on them, it's gonna be so funny.” niki blushed. “I don't have a crush on them! We’re friends, I don't like them like that wilbur.” he just laughed at this. “Niki, your blushing!” niki huffed.

“Wilbur leave Nikki alone, besides we need to do work!” niki turned to see (y/n) yelling at their brother. “I'm still pissed at you for leaving me to deal with techno and tommy.” Wilbur laughs nervously. “I'll do your chores if you don't tell dad.” “deal!” (y/n) sits in the empty seat next to nikki.

“So, what musical do you want to do for the project? Note that we do have to do a duet.” (y/n) says, setting their folder down. “Maybe we could maybe do into the woods? It takes two isn't that hard of a song to do.” niki suggests. “Yeah, we can do that!” niki and (y/n) started to work on their presentation, getting what they needed before they had to leave for class. Wilbur occasionally budded in, bored out of his mind.

“Maybe you should have chosen a different class wilbs. Maybe bother tommy.” (y/n) says, listening to the song they were gonna do. “I dont wanna hang out with Tommy, he's always bothering me about my music.” he crosses his arms and sinks into his chair. “Oh calm down, he's just excited.” niki says, gathering information on her phone. “Niki, you don't have any siblings, shoosh.” niki just laughs.

Things went on like this, right until the class was nearly over. “Oh, niki, you should come over tonight to finish the project. We could practice the song as well!” (y/n) says, moving their chair for the orchestra class that was next. “Yeah, that would be great! I could come over after school?” niki asks. “Yeah, we can walk home together! Gotta make sure to leave Wilbur behind though, he would constantly complain if he were to come along.`` We laugh together. The bell soon rings. “Alright, see you after class ends!” (y/n) says, picking up their stuff. “See you then!” niki puts away her stuff and leaves soon after.

Class went on, (y/n) very excited that niki would be coming over, yet also very nervous. They knew Wilbur would just say something. (y/n) turned to techno, who was in their english class. “Techno, did you read the book we were supposed to read?” technoblade turned to them. “(y/n), this is the second time you're taking this class and you didn't read the book? Again?” (y/n) just glares at him. “I don't like the book, okay! Anyway, did you read it?” techno just sighs, nodding. (y/n) smiled. “Oh thank god! Okay, help me with the essay then.” techno agrees, knowing if they didn't pass, he would get in trouble for not helping.

After a half hour, the bell rings, signalling that school has ended. (y/n) picks up their things, heading to their locker. They see niki waiting for them there. “Did you get out of class early?” (y/n) asked, unlocking the locker. “Yeah, I asked the teacher and she said it was fine!” (y/n) shoves their things into their bag. “Well that's nice of her! Anyways, we better get moving or one of my brothers would force us to ride home with them.” niki nodded, closing (y/n)’s locker for them. They walked down the stairs, heading out of one of the school's many doors.

They walked home, talking about random things as they went along. “You ever think about getting run over when your crossing the road?” niki stared at (y/n), concerned at their comment. “No? Are you okay?” (y/n) nodded. “Yeah im fine.”

After ten minutes, they reach the minecrafts home, noticing that they weren't home yet. “Oh thank god, i forgot they had to pick up tubbo as well.” (y/n) says, opening the door. They both walked inside the dark home. “Im gonna get us some food, just head up to my room!” (y/n) says, taking off their shows and heading to the kitchen. “Alright!” niki says, taking of her own shoes and heading upstairs. Niki spotted a door that had the progressive flag on it. “Oh thats new!” niki says, entering (y/n)’s room. “Wow, their rooms changed since I was last here.

(y/n)’s room was painted (f/c), and had drawings and posters all over the room. They had a desk, with their pc and art stuff atop it. Their bed was unmade, having stuffed animals all over the place. Niki spotted a whale plushie seated on their pillow. “Aww they kept it!” niki had given it to them years ago, so she found it sweet that it was still there.

(y/n) soon came up, holding a bunch of snakes and some cokes. “Sorry this is all we had, tommy wont let us buy anything else.” (y/n) says, handing niki the coke. “Oh, that's alright!” they sit down on (y/n)’s bed. (y/n) sat their snakes on their desk, so as not to spill them all over.

“Okay, we need to actually put the presentation together. You have the notes right?” niki nodded, grabbing her phone while (y/n) sat at their pc, not too far from the pink haired girl. “Okay, so we have-” they did this for a while, niki reading the notes while (y/n) wrote them into the google slide. It soon got to the part where they had to sing their song.

“Okay, so I'll be the baker, and you can be the other one.” (y/n) says, opening the song for them to sing. “Okay, i can do that!'' They started the song, getting ready to sing.

“(Y/N) ARE YOU WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND???” (y/n) stops the song. “I swear to god I will kill tommy. NO JACKASS, WE’RE NOT DATING!!” niki tries to stifle a laugh. “ARE YOU SURE????'' Tommy responds, still downstairs. (y/n) glares at the laughing niki. “Sorry sorry.” niki says, still laughing. “IM POSITIVE, NOW SHUT UP WE’RE TRYING TO DO SOMETHING!!'' Tommy responds immediately. “ARE YOU TWO HAVING SEX??” niki chokes on her own spit, while (y/n) blushes profusely. “OH THAT'S IT, COME HERE YOU LITTLE BITCH!!” (y/n) says, jumping out of their chair, running downstairs to attack the child. Niki leaves as well, wanting to see (y/n) beat up a child.

She comes down the stairs to see (y/n) putting Tommy in a choke hold while techno cheered them on. Niki stands next to techno.

"Apologize! I'll take your Cds if you don't!!!" "No no not my disks!!"

Niki turns towards techno. "Does this regularly happen?" Techno nodded as a response. Niki turned back, seeing Tommy try to bite (y/n). "OH STOP IT RACOON CHILD!!" philza soon comes In and breaks them apart. "Awwe my free entertainment.'' Techno says. "Oh calm down. Tommy, please stop annoying your sibling. This is why you get choked.” Tommy pouts. “Okay phil.” philza glares at the young child. “Also, (y/n), next time, just punch him in the throat. You've learned from techno.” “HEY!'' Tommy says, offended. (y/n) laughs, “okay, will do dadza. Oh, what time is it?” techno looked at his phone. “Its close to 9 pm.” (y/n) pouts, going over to niki and clinging onto her. “Noooo, it can't be her time to leave.” niki giggles, patting (y/n)’s head. “I have to leave. I'll come over soon, okay?” (y/n) nodds, letting go.

They go upstairs together, grabbing nikkis stuff. They go back downstairs to the front door. (y/n) and niki hug each other. “Are you coming back tomorrow?” (y/n) asked, letting go. “Yeah, we did never got to actually practice the song! I'll be over at 4 pm, like always.” (y/n) nodds. “Okay, well, see you tomorrow?” niki nodded, leaning over and kissing (y/n) on the cheek, making them blush. “Yep! See ya, bye!” she says, opening the door and closing it, leaving (y/n) a mess.

“Yep…” they say to themself, smiling happily. “YES!!!! I TOLD YOU THEIR GIRLFRIENDS!! PUSSY DIDN'T EVEN KISS HER THEMSELF HAHA!!” (y/n) turned around, running towards tommy. “COME BACK HERE AND SAY IT TO MY FACE YOU LITTLE BITCH!”

#niki nihachu x reader #niki nihachu #niki nihachu x you #niki nihachu x y/n #nihachu x reader #nihachu #mcyt x reader #school au #dreamsmp x reader

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serenedash · 3 years ago

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I started rambling about my experience with kh and then it turned into khux and then it just turned into me rambling about Ryou and my art journey????? enjoy I guess,

it’s very long but there’s art in there :)

It’s funny to think about my kh journey as a whole tbh, I grew up watching my mom play video games, which included kh1 and 2. I wasn’t allowed to play the playstation2 we owned BUT I did have a gameboy so the first game I played was CoM (after my mom finished it ofc,) so I guess you could say I’ve always been passionate about kh “””side games””” lmao but I did fall off of kh very quickly bc again, I wasn’t allowed to play our PS2 and also I Am A Terrible Gamer I’ve Never Finished CoM I’m sorry you all had to find out like this, but then 358/2 came out when I was in middle school and!!! I didn’t care and I didn’t play idk why lol

Anyway, fast forward to high school I’m like 15 and my older sister, who HAS been keeping up with kh, has a wallpaper on her phone of roxas and ventus. And bc I haven’t kept up I say “nice roxas wallpaper” and she says “thanks but it’s roxas and ventus” and I proceeded to get so mad that I was determined to prove to her that her wallpaper was just roxas twice and then I fell down the BBS rabbit hole and suddenly I was reading about vanitas and then I’m reading the fan translations of the BBS novel and I’m crying??? I am sobbing???? and that’s how I actually got into kh for real lol we are vanitas stans before we are people,

It’s so funny how I thought I was some kh super fan, knowing all this stuff that I spent so long reading and rewatching cutscene movies, but I never once, SOMEHOW NEVER ever came across khx. It’s so absurd and bizarre I seriously have no idea how I never once encountered khx prior to khux. I suppose that has to do with the fact I wasn’t involved in the fandom? In early high school I had stepped away from fandoms as a whole and I didn’t have any interest in really posting content or interacting with fans anymore bc of how burnt out I was from a previous fandom,

but khux released! and I was so hype and excited for it! on launch day I was a senior in high school, I had ran around to every “nerd” and weeb I could find in school to ask them to join my party and fun fact about me is I have crippling social anxiety I literally refuse to start conversations irl so holy shit I was OUT HERE doing the MOST

My player just originally had my name (Matt) but everyone in my party had fun names so Ryou was born! High school was one big yugioh phase for me and ryou bakura is one of my favorite characters ever so it was just the logical name choice lol I quickly started creating Ryou, the character, as well. I was also leaving my homestuck phase and that + vanitas obsession made This character design (art circa 2016)

If y’all are familiar with my kh oc’s you might notice that keyblade now belongs to my kid Monty LOL

Anyway that got scrapped quickly for the chip and dale outfit (which is where Ryou’s trademark goggles are from <3) Goggles have been a staple of my character designs for a LONG TIME so like, it had to be done, (that’s a separate ramble about a separate oc tho)

OG Ryou was an interesting guy; he was a young party leader with this overwhelming responsibility on his shoulders bc of his status as a party leader. In his original story, he also struggled heavily with darkness, much like Terra but for Ryou it was more that the darkness was controlling him and not like a source of power like it was for Terra

A big part of early Ryou I kept, however, was the crushing awareness of loss. One of my party members (the strongest one at the time,) had left without saying a word and I was very confused and hurt. This was around the time the ephemera plot was happening so I decided to incorporate it into Ryou’s story; having him experience losing a friend to darkness since it’s so normal for wielders in Daybreak Town to just disappear, and this would unintentionally become a theme for both me and Ryou as khux friends would just randomly disappear.

I was desperate for khux at this point and I decided to watch the fan translations for khx and GOD, god, was I obsessed. I couldn’t stop thinking about the foretellers. And I’m not going off about that here bc I already did that, but I actually started entering fandom again! I did it slowly, I started on tumblr before this blog was made altho it was me sending anons to the few khux related blogs I could have lol a friend convinced me to get twitter where I got involved with the ffxv fandom, which led me to the kh fandom and eventually the khux fandom there which is what REALLY got me going on khux.

I joined discord servers, most of the servers I’m in are khux related, and from there I joined the khux oc rp (shout out to anyone there who might be reading this lol here’s some art from the beginning of the rp,)

It’s SO FUNNY how the RP influenced me so heavily. I hadn’t RP’d in YEARS, I used to have a strict no oc rp policy, but here I was? And the funny part is, I had barely developed Ryou. I had scrapped his original story and all I had was POST WAR Ryou so I literally had to reverse write him; I had only ever written him as a depressed, guilt ridden adult, but it was a fucking blast and I have such fond memories of this rp when it was active,

But anyway, this encouraged me to get more serious about art! I started drawing, writing, cosplaying, and roleplaying when I hadn’t done any of that stuff in a very long time. The first time I ever drew a background was for a deviant art khux competition actually LOL

also! I always think extremely fondly of the drawing I did of Aced in the keyblade war. It was also one of the first backgrounds I ever drew and it felt like my real starting point in the khux fandom. It got a ton of notes on here and someone wrote a tiny fic in a reblog which just made me SO HAPPY like it really felt like people were noticing me :) I was going to draw a matching Ira but!! I just never did!! One day tho, it’s on my art bucket list to redraw this along with Ira,

Aside from my personal growth, khux was great for my social life ngl, I made SO MANY friends online and got to meet a ton of people irl over the years! It’s crazy to think about all the people I now know and talk to? It honestly makes me really emotional. I’ll never forget taking the train into NYC and meeting up with discord friends. Going to conventions and talking with people about the latest khux update? Absolutely insane and those were some GOOD TIMES, if I thanked every khux friend or even just person who made an impact on me then we’d be here for a LONG TIME,

Fun fact, for my Lauriam cosplay all I needed to buy was the wig I just owned his outfit LOL also? Probably retiring that cosplay ngl people treated me like absolute garbage when I wore him and it led to a lot of confidence issues for awhile ngl. That’s probably one of the only memorable negative experiences I have with khux; it was great when khux people recognized me but for kh fans that weren’t in khux? They were FUCKING MEAN??? fuck kh fandom at large, I only care about khux fandom,

This leads me to another huge part of my experience in khux fandom: THEORIES!! I used to write SO MANY and oh my god my brain was so full all the time. It was a huge appeal for me in the fandom; I had been previously writing theory posts in the RWBY fandom and it just migrated over to khux for me lol I had done a ton of theorizing around Lauriam tbh, it was really the only reason I liked his character at all bc initially I did not care about the dandelions, anyone who wasn’t Skuld I was like “please leave Now thanks”

A funny part of khux fandom I never intended to be apart of is the MEMES, I really only started doing memes as stress relief bc college had me so busy all I had time/energy for was these quick little shit post drawings.

The first meme I made, file name “invi despair” LOL we need to get her a girlfriend smh anyway, I think in my senior year of college I did a bunch of rapid fire memes all in one month bc the stress of finals was getting so bad afdgfhdgf as far as I know my impact on this fandom will be my memes bc all I do now is enter a kh/khux server and introduce myself and I go “yeah I draw art. here’s a meme” and everyone goes OH YOU, honestly I am nothing if not a clown

I’ve talked so much idk where I’m going with this. Khux is just a good game even if the gameplay actually kind of really sucks yknow lol but it was the first game I played where I like, REALLY got into the meta and the mechanics. I used to read so much on the mechanics and watch youtube videos on which medals were worth pulling for. I was never a whale or a top player exactly, but I could rank well if I tried lol I’ve made it to the top 100 for solo rankings, my party has made it to top 10, and in pvp I’ve made top 300. I’m not the highest level in my party but FUCK do I know how to manipulate this game LOL

And with all that hard work, the strategies, the theorizing, the content I’ve made-- it’s been my life for 5 years. I’ve logged into khux almost every single day. At the end, I have logged 1820 days in khux out of 1910 days. Kinda crazy. Crazier I’ve never spent money on khux either lol the only “money” gone into it was one time my mom gave me a google play store gift card and I used it on my birthday for a VIP xemnas medal which eventually made it to regular pulls anyway but it was nice and a little treat :)

I’m not a gacha fan, I don’t care for it, so I don’t think I’ll be touching another gacha again. But for kh? This was pretty fucking awesome, even if it sucked a lot sometimes LOL It was worth it for the people I’ve met most of all I think. I would honestly be a completely different person without khux and that’s REALLY insane to think about.

#the khux hyperfixation is REAL #but yall knew this about me #there's so much more I could say but it's 2am and this is long enough already #im rambling

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ashyblondwaves · 4 years ago

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Hey I’m not sure if headcanons might help your night or maybe make you smile but I have a couple of questions (if you’re feeling up to it obviously!!)

1. What are your headcanons about Wanda and Vision’s first time?

2. What are some things that they experiment with in the bedroom to either learn about each other or explore some fantasies? Is their safe word paprika?

3. Do they sing in bed when they’re doing the do??

6. Does Vision attempt dirty talk ever? Does it go well and Wanda is just super pleasantly surprised? Does it go terribly and Wanda laughs and Vision gets sad so she fucks a smile back on his face?

7. Has Wanda ever been so drunk that she hit on Vision? Has she been so drunk that Vision hit on her and she was appalled because she has a partner (a human one and tall!)

8. Has Vision ever bought Wanda lingerie, toys, crotch less underwear??

9. Has Wanda ever bought Vision lingerie (if they’re into that or some sexy boxer briefs? Idk fuck gender norms) or a toy or crotch less underwear?

11. Did Wanda’s jaw drop when she saw Vision’s naked body (not out of the cradle but in an intimate setting) for the first time?

12. What was Vision’s reaction to seeing Wanda naked for the first time?

13. Do they do a couples shower on a regular basis (for the environment!!)?

14. Do they ever go to Avengers galas and such and pretend not to be together but still dance and sneak away for some bathroom stall sex? Do they make each other jealous for fun??

15. Have they ever had sex on the ceiling, upside down, floating????

16. Does Vision slide Wanda’s copious rings on and off of her after sex and give her fingers little kissies?

18. Does Vision go out at 3am when she wants some random food due to cravings?

19. Does the family have photo shoots with atrocious coordinating outfits?

20. Are Wanda and Vision pounding one out as we speak??

This is a lot and even if you don’t answer I hope that they give you happy thoughts!! Depression ain’t got nothing on you queen.

Oooh look at all these goodies! I’m stuck here until 7am so let’s crack on with these!

1. What are your headcanons about Wanda and Vision’s first time? It was very slow, very careful. They took care of each other, made sure the other was ok throughout. It was all very new and exciting for them, so it was even a little scary. Wanda wasn’t sure what it’d be like to have sex with a sythezoid and well, it was Vision’s first time, period. He just hoped those pleasure receptors were in working order.

2. What are some things that they experiment with in the bedroom to either learn about each other or explore some fantasies? Is their safe word paprika? Light bondage, teasing, edging, pegging. They also have a game to see if Vision can make Wanda cum before the commercials are over during whatever TV show they’re watching. He’s never lost. Safe word is paprika, sure lol. Just read that in a fic yesterday, I thought that was a cute idea.

3. Do they sing in bed when they’re doing the do?? No singing. That kills the mood instantly.

4. When was the first time they shared a bed? Was it in the compound? Did he hear her having nightmares and go to her? Did she ask him to stay before he came on his own or did she ask him to stay once he had already woken her up? I’d like to think it was at the compound, yes. He knew she was having a rough night and phased through to her room and gently roused her from sleep to make sure she was ok. She asked him to stay. He held her all night.

5. Does vision wear socks? Are they the ones with toes or nah? Does he wear socks while he and Wanda are having sex? Did he have some hilarious fashion moments before he figured out how to put amazing outfits together? He definitely wears socks, but not during sex. Just regular dress socks most of the time since he’s a snappy dresser. I don’t think he had any fashion faux pas. He researched extensively before putting his first outfit together.

6. Does Vision attempt dirty talk ever? Does it go well and Wanda is just super pleasantly surprised? Does it go terribly and Wanda laughs and Vision gets sad so she fucks a smile back on his face? He’s both tried and failed and tried and succeeded. Early on, he wasn’t great at it. His analytical ways got the best of him, but as he loosened up and became more comfortable with things, he got better at it. He also read a lot of Google results on talking dirty after his failed attempt. Wanda rolled with it, she’s endeared by him and never laughs in his face. She just smiles and rolls with it.

7. Has Wanda ever been so drunk that she hit on Vision? Has she been so drunk that Vision hit on her and she was appalled because she has a partner (a human one and tall!) Wanda doesn’t usually let herself get beyond tipsy. She doesn’t like that loss of control that being drunk gives her. But she’s certainly been tipsy enough to whisper some pretty suggestive things to Vision while out in public.

8. Has Vision ever bought Wanda lingerie, toys, crotch less underwear?? He bought some handcuffs to use on Wanda and got her a g-spot stimulator for her birthday while he was still learning how to find it. He really enjoyed watching her use it and it helped him find it himself.

9. Has Wanda ever bought Vision lingerie (if they’re into that or some sexy boxer briefs? Idk fuck gender norms) or a toy or crotch less underwear? She got him some underwear that looked like Santa’s suit for him to wear on Christmas Eve one year. It was ridiculous, but he wore them just long enough to get Wanda going. Wanda also has a couple strap ons for pegging purposes that she bought.

10. How did they approach the idea of pegging? Did they see it in a porn? Did Wanda bring it up as an idea? Did Vision? Was he embarrassed to ask/ did he stumble over his words and act kind of nervous for a couple of days before he asked her? What was her reaction? It was a bit of an awkward conversation. Wanda brought it up one night on a whim to see what Vision would say and to her surprise he agreed and said it was something he’d be willing to try. They spent a lot of time doing research together (Vision insisted) before Wanda bought the strap on and they had a good talk before they tried it for the first time. Safe word, paprika.

11. Did Wanda’s jaw drop when she saw Vision’s naked body (not out of the cradle but in an intimate setting) for the first time? Nah but remember that look she gave him when he was “born”? Think of that but even more lustful.

12. What was Vision’s reaction to seeing Wanda naked for the first time? He thought she was absolutely beautiful. He was in awe of her and tbh still is when he sees her naked.

13. Do they do a couples shower on a regular basis (for the environment!!)? Definitely. Wanda always gets pampered in the shower and she loves it. Standing there while Vision washes her up.

14. Do they ever go to Avengers galas and such and pretend not to be together but still dance and sneak away for some bathroom stall sex? Do they make each other jealous for fun?? After awhile they realized they weren’t fooling anyone and stopped pretending. After that they stayed attached at the hip, were dancing for every slow song played and left early so they could get home and devour each other.

15. Have they ever had sex on the ceiling, upside down, floating???? Well sure! They have the ability, so why not?

16. Does Vision slide Wanda’s copious rings on and off of her after sex and give her fingers little kissies? He plays with her hands after sex. Spins the rings, kissing the tips of her fingers, spins another, kisses her palm. It feels nice, so Wanda lets him indulge.

17. How does Vision make Wanda feel better when she is upset during her pregnancies? Like when she can’t fit into her clothes or when she’s feeling self conscious or when she just gets emotional all of a sudden? Or when she’s having superhero anxiety about safety for the boys, the new baby, Vision, herself? How often does he stare or grab her belly bc he’s obsessed? He’s always there to assure her that she’s beautiful and the reason she can’t fit in her clothes is a good one and it will all be worth it. A protective hand is never far away when Vision is around Wanda’s belly. Vision also gives the best dad talks after the boys are born, helping Wanda to feel better about their safety.

18. Does Vision go out at 3am when she wants some random food due to cravings? You know it!

19. Does the family have photo shoots with atrocious coordinating outfits? No atrocious outfits, but the photos shoots, yes. We saw them in WV! My headcanon of course is that they were Vision’s idea.

20. Are Wanda and Vision pounding one out as we speak?? Of course they are lmao.

#asks #reply #headcanons #Anonymous

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clvmtines · 3 years ago

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welcome aboard, clementine martinez, student #2. we are excited to set sail with you ! has anyone told you that you look like alexa demie? according to our records, you hail from florida, usa, prefer she / her pronouns, are a cis woman, and are here to study creative writing. we also see you received a spot on the ss university because of your online lottery win — we won’t tell anyone. during your first few weeks here, other students said you were + charming, + free-spirited, but also - restive. it sounds like you spend most of your time at the billiards room. upon checking your luggage, we noticed you packed a casino chip carried around for luck from home. hopefully your roommates don’t steal it!

hi friends! i’m very excited to be here. i’m jay (est, she/her) n i used to play astrid nyland a few months ago if anyone remembers bt i had to leave for personal reasons. i’m so glad to be back now that i hve life sorted and some free time for summer break <3 read on for some details abt this new muse of mine, clementine.

01. biography !

so ! clementine was born in florida. & yes, her real name is clementine. her mom thot it was the cutest name idea ever. clementine mostly goes by clem. she comes from the town [redacted] in florida bcoz i am too lazy to look up a specific town <3 but alas ! it was swampy and humid and she lived in a trailer park.

her parents got knocked up at nineteen. clem was born nine months after a particularly wild 1999 fourth of july. her birthday is march 26th and she’s an aries.

(TW: addiction, child injury) clem’s dad was a gambling addict and petty criminal—he wld steal credit cards n whatnot. he wld gamble away diaper money n it would cause constant fighting until her dad finally left. her mom took this very hard n began drinking a bit too often, leaving clem to to make cereal for dinner n fend for herself. once clem tried to make hot dogs on the stove and spilled boiling water on herself. got a p bad burn on her arm/shoulder and still has a big scar.

the soundtrack of her childhood was cicadas buzzing and stray dogs barking. the sizzle and pop of natty light cans. turning up her ipod to max volume to drown out the sounds of her mother fighting with her new boyfriend.

throughout her upbringing, clem’s dad was always in and out of the picture. he’d blow into town when he hit it big. he’d take her on these little “adventures” like staying in a motel 6 n renting movies at block buster n ordering good pizza nt the dominos shit she ate with her mom lol. ofc he was charging it all to someone’s stolen credit card. he’d always promise to, like, take clem away. n clem was a daddy’s girl so she believed him. the last time it happened was her h.s. graduation. her mom didn’t show ( "overslept” after a bender ) but her dad did and surprised her n said everything wld be different. bt then he bailed on their plans for the next day n when she called his cell, the number was disconnected. tht was the defining “i’m done” moment. clem promised to never be disappointed by her father again.

(TW: racism) her mother has mexican ancestry and clem’s always been called her twin. but clem was raised in a predominately white area and honestly ?? it was really hard without her even realizing it. she’s still unpacking a lot of things today abt her youth that jst weren’t okay bt she thought were normal. like microaggressions, stereotypes, being fetishized by boys in high school. gross shit.

as a kid, clem was rumored to be really poor bc she wore tattered clothes n got free lunch at school. once she invited a friend to her house & the next day they told everyone it’s in a trailer park. that reputation—the “trailer park girl”—was really hard to shake. and clem got almost desperate to shake it. she was endlessly trying to set her old self on fire and emerge from the ashes like a phoenix.

eventually clem became more “popular”. in school she was, like, a straight b student. very average although super creative and quick-thinking. she always had street smarts. problem solving skills. independence. more of, like, practical intelligence as opposed to book smarts because academia bores her tbh. she was like why am i reading these overrated boring books by dead white men or learning abt polynomials when i know nothing abt how to pay a mortage or do taxes. like...she saw the american education system as bullshit and put in modest effort because she didn’t believe it deserved her sweat and tears.

however, she entered the online lottery for the seas program on a whim and got in. so she’s studying creative writing now.

02. personality !

first thing you shld know abt clem is that she’s a compulsive liar essentially—she tells various stories to make her life seem better than what it was. to one person, she’s an heiress to a real estate company and grew up wealthy. to the next she was raised by nomadic hippies. some of her lies are small fibs while others are grandiose tales. she rarely talks about her actual upbringing. she hates talking abt her family or the v real trauma of growing up in a household where both parents struggled w/ addiction; the uncertainty, the broken promises, the fact that she had to grow up so soon and deal w/ so much. it wasn’t fair, and if she thinks about it too much, she feels this anger. anger at the universe. anger at her circumstances. she doesn’t know where to put this anger. she doesn’t know how to shrink it. so she avoids it.

despite her rough upbringing, though, clem is actually really sweet and kind. she’s adventurous, fun-loving, free-spirited, and bold.

bt ! she can also be closed-off, competitive and restive.

she’s seemingly tight with everyone? like she’s jst that girl who can get along with anyone tbh.

in her spare time you can catch her tanning by the pool, hanging at the bar, playing pool ( which she learned from her dad ), and socializing. she’ll never say no to hanging out with people.

she learned a lot from her little “adventures” with her dad, who was very good at conning others and often involved her in his dumb little scams. clem is suuuper good at pulling the ‘im baby 🥺’ card to get what she wants.

she can be a little selfish, because she grew up looking out for herself.

stubborn and dogmatic as hell !!!

she doesn’t do too many relationships but when she does fall, i imagine she falls hard and fast. she refuses to be made a fool of, tho. when she gets vulnerable she flashes back to being a kid, waiting all day for her dad to show up only to have him bail on her. again. she hates that feeling. so if she, like, senses a shift in someone’s energy she’ll b like, “i’ll break up with u before u can do it to me” and the person wasn’t even tryna dump her lmao.

has a lot of sex. too much ?? sex?? mayb. but she’s v sex positive.

her personal style is v late 90s. hair clips, big scrunchies, neon, fur trim, crop and tube tops, hoop earrings, chokers, patterns, platform shoes, biodegradable glitter cuz it’s good fr the earth *winks*. clothes from o-mighty.......actually jst google o mighty, pull up the images and That is clem. she dresses like a bratz doll. she’s dedicated to the aesthetic.

03. headcanons !

her item brought from home is a hot pink poker chip from a casino. her dad gave it to her. he said it reminded him of her because of the color; he got it during one of his winning streaks and said it was lucky. she has a complicated relationship w/ her dad n doesn’t even speak to him anymore, bt she will never go anywhere without it.

she’s a smol bean—only 5′4

an astrology girl and she reads palms ! she absolutely makes astrology tik toks that people only watch because she’s hot. her flirting technique is to ask you to read your palm.

she doesn’t typically drink to get drunk. but she does love a good sugary cocktail. to her, a drink is like an accessory. a blue fishbowl by the pool, a jack and coke as she stands around a bar. usually she'll nurse the same beverage for a while. if you see her wasted it usually means she’s going thru it emotionally lol. the one thing she does do is drugs tho

pretty much listens to exclusively female artists.

a bit of an activist. environmentalism, feminism and the like, she’s v outspoken. vegan for ethical reasons (TW: drugs) bt still does cocaine. she wears shirts with ‘my pussy my choice’ bedazzled on the front.

loves to rollerblade ! back home she didn’t have a car so she’d bike or rollerblade. now she still has her blades and she’ll use them when the ship docks.

03. wanted connections !

Friends, bffs, ride or dies, friends who are like siblings to her, maybe a friend with an unrequited crush on either side ??

an ex she dumped/cheated on/otherwise self sabotaged their relationship because she was afraid of vulnerability.

an ex friend who realized she lies a lot abt herself n felt betrayed. OH ! ESP if they opened up to her on many occasions abt intimate, personal stuff. imagine the betrayal they felt when they found that everything they thought they knew abt clem is a lie.

someone who she actually opens up to. a confidant. or, maybe, like, a stranger she drunkenly spilled her soul to and now she avoids them like the plague.

a rival. clem can be competitive.

her drug dealer

someone she knows she shouldn’t hook up with and… does it anyways. like a friend’s ex or smthing. spicy <3

i welcome anything !

#seasintro #addiction tw #alcohol tw #drugs tw

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woulddieforperrytheplatypus · 4 years ago

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ok so i have a hc (two technically) that would explain rodney's hatred of doof (and doof's dislike of monogram): Heinz and Rodney dated in highschool after being best childhood friends, but they broke it off before the graduated and have hated eachother ever since. similarly, doof and monogram dated in college, neither knwoing about the other's job, so when monogram found out he was dating a villain and visa versa, he broke it off completely. just wanted to tell someone this, sorry to bother you

YESSSS MONOGRAM X HEINZ IS MY SHIT

okay now that i’ve gotten that out of the way, here’s an actual semi-coherent response (but not before I tell you that you are not bothering me at all and I live for other people’s headcanons and just general thoughts on the show and I was super excited to see this ask)

it occurred to me midway through the next paragraph that this is all dependent on when Heinz started evil science, and that I can’t really finish writing this without an idea of when that might have happened, so I’m gonna kinda think “out loud” for a second. Absolutely nothing in this paragraph is important if y’all wanna skip it, but I figured I’d throw my thoughts out there anyway because, like, that’s what I do lol. We know he’s been building inators since he was a kid, but that at least his first inator wasn’t evil. We know he wasn’t serious about becoming the ruler of anything during his date with Linda, whenever that happened. We know he’s tried other things, from painting to poetry, before deciding on evil. We know he bought a $15 degree in evil science online, but that he did go to school for it because he had that one professor whose name I can never spell and that I’m too lazy to google. Was he interested in evil when he was in high school? Was Rodney interested in evil in high school? Part of me hopes they weren’t, just because I think it would be hilarious if they dated in high school as average people and then “reconnected” years later through evil science when it wasn’t even an interest they shared when they were together. I’m also interested in the logistics of their childhood friendship, because I absolutely love the idea of young Heinz having at least one person who likes him and understands him and who’s interested in building just like he is, and I have to imagine they both would have been ostracized for their love of building and inventing because Drusselstein is notorious for hating change and inventing is change. But how does that friendship transfer between countries? I can kinda see Rodney also being from Drusselstein, though I almost feel like he would have had to leave when he was younger than 16 because a) if he has an accent (which tbh I can’t tell with that voice lmao), it’s not as pronounced and b) he seems more cultured than Heinz in a way? Like I can’t really think of an example, but he just gives me the vibes of someone who’s been in America since he was younger -- even, like, 13 or 14, which could actually fit with the timeline if Rodney’s a year or two younger than him: Rodney left first, and Heinz was tricked by his family into following him a year or so later. They reconnect in high school and get together then. Idk, I feel like there’s a lot to think about there and I’m definitely gonna give it more thought because this is a really interesting concept. Anyways, side rant over and we’re back to where I was before I got sidetracked and put the side rant on top.

I’m not gonna lie: the idea of Heinz and Rodney dating has never occurred to me before, but now that you’ve said it I am living for it. I mean, there is absolutely no way they started hating each other so passionately without some sort of behind-the-scenes drama, and a lifelong friendship-turned-relationship gone sour would explain so much. I mean, this isn’t just your average breakup. It’s not even your average bad breakup. This sounds more like someone you thought would be a lifelong friend stabbing you in the back, and of course they would never let that go. I do find myself wondering what went wrong, though. They definitely treat each other like they think the other one wronged them, so whatever it was had to be a mutual thing. I’m open to hearing theories if anyone’s got any 👀

I love the idea of Monogram and Heinz dating in college. There’s definitely something going on with them, because I definitely can’t see Monogram paying attention to any other evil scientist as much as he does Heinz. I mean, he assigned his best agent to the guy and everything. I don’t know if Monogram actually went to college (?) because he did that stint at The Academy™ but I can lowkey see Monogram going to The Academy™ and Heinz going to Evil Science School™ and they meet somewhere (maybe The Academy™ sends their recruits to the local college for their pre-reqs and they met during calc class or something idk) and hit it off. I have absolutely no doubt that they would hit it off, either; that scene in Perry the Actorpus where they have a friendly conversation until Heinz accidentally starts saying something stupid comes to mind. They’re both very different kinds of stupid, but they’d complement each other. And now that I think about it, I kinda do hope they met while Monogram was at The Academy™ just because I think the absolute best kind of reveal that Heinz is evil would be him showing up in some capacity at The Academy™ (maybe the evil science majors take a group “field trip” to The Academy™ every year so both the evil science majors and The Academy™ recruits can learn about their natural enemies) and Heinz and Monogram just see each other and they’re like 0_0 Heinz would absolutely be willing to try to work around this (I mean, just look at how he treats Perry. The line between good and evil is very distinct, but he’s more than willing to ignore it) but Monogram would end things immediately, and that would break Heinz’s heart piss Heinz off so much that he would absolutely hold a grudge against Monogram for the rest of eternity, and Monogram would have a special focus on Heinz, too, just because of their history.

tl;dr I am in love with these headcanons and would absolutely be down for hearing more about them if you (or anyone else) has anything to add

#it's 4:00 am and i just spent 45 minutes on this ask for no reason other than i could lol #i should probably go to bed #look i have an ask #pnf #heinz doofenshmirtz #major monogram #rodney #Aloyse Everheart Elizabeth Otto Wolfgang Hypatia Gunther Galen Gary Cooper von Roddenstein #shoutout to tumblr for remembering that whole tag after seeing me type ''aloy'' lmao

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mayabishopapologist · 4 years ago

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station 19 - season 4, etc

this is long but i want to put down my thoughts before thursday comes and i guess i have A Lot To Say.

honestly didn’t pay much attention to this show until halfway through season two— always liked maya and was glad that they gave her more to do. going into season 3, i was excited for more character development &stronger storylines. however, by the end of 301 the dip in quality was glaringly obvious. a quick google search revealed that there was a new showrunner and, well, it showed.

while the show had been going in a really good direction with balancing the screen time between andy and the other regulars, this season, the plot was all over the place. it was uber dramatic and just. so much happened just to happen? seemed like every other episode had a major event(deaths alone; ryan,rigo,pruitt?!!?). they were so frequent, it was hard to process. it was also hard to get invested as the characters themselves moved on(or were shown to have moved on, extremely quickly!)

i enjoy the show for what it is and i have no delusions about broadcast tv shows (or shondaland productions, for that matter)but the suspension of disbelief.... i mean: a stabbing, a robbery, a shooting and a car crash? all in one episode? please! lmaooooo. drama for dramas sake is always boring and weakens the story.

& as for the characters... .

everyone felt like a hollow version of themselves this season and it was hard to watch sometimes, actually. characters switched motivations /personalities for the sake of the current episode and i know this show is very ‘monster/emergency of the week’ but. some consistency! please! like—

maya: she’s always been determined and focused but they went so far with it this season, it was almost cartoonish. her competitiveness was hinted at in season 2 but she was always portrayed as self aware. ‘the beast,’ as she dubbed it to andy, was something she knew of and tried to contain, because she knew it could get out of hand.

yet, in season 3 she suddenly forgets this and just. becomes the most power hungry/singularly focused person, ever. she goes after the captain position behind andy’s back, (citing andy’s emotional state, because of the death of her best friend as a reason she shouldn’t get the job?? huh. since when is maya this purely callous??!) she just doesn’t give af, suddenly, about andy at all, and goes for a job that she is hardly qualified for(she was lieutenant for like, a few months?)

and then after she gets the position, she just. loses all sense of reality? literally she was so unhinged(fun to watch but so much) and it was like. um?? maya has never been the uptight one (they've mentioned and depicted andy as being the one like this, multiple times!) and we know she knows how to have fun, so, for her to all of a sudden just. not know how to read the room? yeah okay. to make her so intense and severe, especially w the drills and training was, a choice. a bad one, on the writers part. like, i get that they needed her start as captain to be dramatic or whatever, but there were ways to do that. and even the animosity with the team and her went so far, i just think that whole storyline was amazingly lazy, honestly.

and the friendships!! andy and maya’s friendship is just, a mess. at this point they've spent more time at odds, and the idea that they're supposed to be best friends with this super close bond? yeah, i just... i dont buy it tbh. if they'd spent more time building up their connections and making us understand why they would be friends and showing them being there for each other past a few scattered scenes her and there? maybe. but so far, that hasn't been the case. making that bond real, solidifying that friendship, would have made this conflict have more of an emotional impact. but doing it now? making maya ‘turn’ on andy, this soon and this drastically just. it made her seem like she was extremely jealous and had been waiting to pull the rug out from under andy all along. and also, why would they stay friends when, so far, maya has showed, time and time again, that she’s willing to let her wants/ambitions leech on her loyalty to andy? (jack thing, job thing, etc). although, it’s not like andy’s a good friend to maya either, she’s selfish and seems to like it when maya is in her corner but isnt always there for her. they went so far with the idea that maya was this coldly calculating asshole that she was almost a villain?? it was so silly to me.

and the traumatic home life plot they gave to maya was clearly their attempt at some adding nuance to her character and trying to explain why she would act the way she did, but to me? it fell flat. it was rushed, and they went from zero to 100(why did her mother come to talk about her divorce/abuse at maya’s job? like she was literally working? idgi. no boundaries lmaoo)

and i actually relate and sympathize w maya a lot. and while i liked that they were exploring the many ways abuse can present itself, it was very... hm, ham-fisted. just super rushed and then wrapped up so quickly. they have, i think, written themselves into this dark place i fear they have no intention of exploring.

and while i understand it, i hated how far they let maya go, especially because i don't feel they’ll adequately address it. they move on so quickly( maya was deaf for like half a season and then. she just. wasn't) and i hate the idea of her just being ‘fixed’. a relationship and an apology doesn't undo years of abuse, idc. also will they ever address maya’s um, thoughts about death??? because that was super heavy and not just something someone gets over? going to need for her to get actual professional help. that isn’t her girlfriend, like. asap.

speaking of carina, i do like her and maya together a lot. big part of why i watch, ngl. but i need their relationship to be a lot more reciprocal. like, lets dial it back on the codependency, maybe. carina cant (and shouldn't have to) hold her up so much ! that’s not love. also maya needs to start being a good girlfriend. they started off that way, i know they can get back there. but like, we hardly got to see them settle into it, we got those cute 30sec clips of sweetness then maya was lashing out and cheating and it was like. wait a minute! what???

for s4, i want to see them working at reconciling—im talking, groveling, awkward in-between moments where carina isnt sure she can trust her. okay, tough conversations, hell, even jealousy because let's be real. maya working with jack is a lot for carina to just. take? i know i absolutely would not be happy about that, but i also wouldnt take maya back so... anyway! brushing over that would not just be a missed storytelling opportunity, but it would also be super unfair to carina and do a huge disservice to their relationship as a whole. as cute as they are, having cute moments with no real depth would get very old, very quickly.

carina: what can i say but-perfect, amazing, fantastic, WOW

seriously, carina is almost unrealistically perfect. she takes a lot and has been through the most (can they be nice 2 her this season? like just for fun) going forward, im going to need her to be more than a plot device to calm and soothe maya. i get that she was introduced as a love interest, but in season 4(as a season!!regular!!) that cant be all she is.

speaking of, it was really weird to me that she was promoted to station 19 and not greys because... what is a gynecologist going to do at a fire station? the general consensus seems to be that she’ll join warren’s PRT but like. she’s not a general surgeon so that’s a reach but, i want her around so ill buy it. i just want better and more for her tbh. not just screen-time, but also character development and depth! also friends! tired of carina being isolated, they did it on greys which. a waste! i meaaan, amelia was RIGHT. THERE. just look at the material! for s19, i want her, vic and travis to be friends or even just her and vic, like yesplease! i also want to know more about her and im tired of her being treated badly. like, i think society had progressed past carina being shitted on, thanks!

vic: my fave!!! they did so lazy by her this season ugh. she’s so charismatic and charming and just so good!! yet, her storyline was all over the place. we hardly got to see her sit with her grief (spontaneous crying aside; barrett doss is so good!) she was just kind of... around. and that relationship w jackson. lol. it was so obviously for crossover potential and well. i didnt hate it or like it. actually, i was mostly indifferent. bored, even when they were onscreen together. i just didn't care and wanted more of vic, not vic and whoever. i know they're up in the air rn but i wouldn’t be torn up if he doesn’t come back.

i want more for vic past just romantic entanglements. i know we’ve gotten a bit of her past, but i would like to see more! also, what about employment accomplishments? her artsy theatre friends? her family? just. more vic, please!!

she’s so fun and cool and when they let her, she shines. they need to let her!

jack: my boy! so dumb, but i love him sm. he def needs like. major help, though lmao. and maybe it’s just me but im tired of his sex addict plot. like, we get it, but can we move on now? kthanks. they need to let him work on himself especially, the constant self sabotage. it's getting old. for ALL of them, actually, seriously, how many times can they all get in their own way.

andy: don’t really think about her. the mom storyline seems like it would be wonderfully dramatic, im intrigued. she and sullivan are cute, i guess. hope they make it.

ben: no major issues w his storyline, hardly remember it honestly. i liked the rapport he was building w vic and want them to explore that relationship more, its cute.

travis: so funny and adorable, let him do more.

dean: loved him in all his entitled first born African son glory. i didnt so much love the baby plot but that always bores me. his sudden love for vic though. lol. since when? it def, came out of no where and while i really enjoy their friendship, to me, there is zero romantic chemistry there so i would prefer it if they just. stopped. lmao. also. the way he treated her because he could get a handle on his emotions? ridiculous. has humanity not like, gotten past the ‘he’s mean bc he likes you’ thing?? like grow up maybe?

and this isnt just about dean but like. are there not more single young people in seattle? why do they all have to sleep with the same 5 people. ik for the sake of plot, workplace relationships are easier but still. i think they should branch out. really.

overall, i want better for all of them, and i think if the writers would just. take a moment and stop trying to tell so many stories in such little time, they could do better! also, whoever’s out there. please, enough w the crossovers! dont want to be forced to watch greys just to know what’s happening on 19. i get that they're in the same universe. it’s only mentioned every other episode. we. get, it. i liked what they did with private practice, it was like once every few seasons. and i know they won’t do that, but maybe, two a season.

this is so much. but this how does have a ton of potential and i just really want it . like, get there.

#either way #im still watching lmao #h8 it here lol #station 19 #maya bishop #vic hughes #andy herrera #dean miller #jack gibson #ben warren #travis montgomery #s19 #mtxt #if u see spelling mistakes #no u didnt xx #me writing dissertations to justify why im stuck here lmaoo

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atopearth · 4 years ago

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Piofiore: Fated Memories Part 3 - Yang Route

Time for Yang!! I'm so excited tbh because I love his voice and he seems like the most interesting character haha. Anyway, I didn't expect Yang to so suddenly kiss her when she's trying to run away from his subordinates after getting captured by them. Love how her slapping his face was like nothing to him lol. I also really like how Yang is basically forcing her with his "aura" to make her understand that she needs to ask intelligent questions in regards to her own situation right now if she wants Yang to not kill her, keeps the tension high and interesting. Although Yang isn't nice in the way Gil and Dante are, he is pretty nice to her in the sense that he kinda allows her to do what she wants if she uses her brain and resists him in a logical way he can understand? I loved the CG of him pushing her down on the bed🥺 Nice to know that if she doesn't stay in the same room as him and let others think she's Yang's woman, everyone is going to screw around with her...😶 Lmao when he "kindly" took her as a cat to hug instead of a woman, so he won't do anything to her haha. I guess that's his compromise🤣

Okay, Lili sitting on Yang's lap and him feeding her congee (probably) is like so hot lmao. On another note, I can't imagine a weird breakfast of xiao long bao, congee and fried chicken?? What is this weird Asian mix hahaha. Hahahaha, I love how much Yang loves to tease her, especially when he calls her human or cat depending on what he feels like. He's forceful to kiss her but I'm assuming he's just being considerate for her in his own way. I feel sorry for Orlok. It's early in the morning and he's in for the shock of his life already since Yang and Lili are making it seem like they had sex lol. Considering Yang's important regards towards eating meals, I wonder if it's because of something like he used to be a street rat or something and starved? I feel like Fei and Lan are pretty cuteee, sad that they died in Dante's route tbh, especially the way Lan died, it just seemed like she was so overcome with grief over Fei's death and didn't know how to cope, which is understandable since they're twins. Awww, I love how Fei said Lan was cuter when she said Lili with blonde hair was cute like a doll.

It's like culture shock for Lili to come to Veleno and try to help someone but realise they're like high on drugs... I guess the twins lectured her in a way that they just wanted her to be more careful than thinking she's stupid, especially since they tried to cheer her up with a mantou haha, why not a cha siu bao though🥺🥺 To be fair, mantou were cheap, warm and filling back in the day, whereas cha siu bao was more luxurious I guess haha. Okay wait, excuse me!! The voices can't say it's mantou and then say it has meat and vegetables!! That's a meat and veggies bun, completely different loll! If even the twins think it's weird for these drug addicts to be so ferocious, I wonder if it's because Lee is starting to do his own thing to try and take over the Lao-Shu? It's nice that Yang saved Lan and Fei in Gau Lung Seng Caai, it's a pretty bad and lawless place after all so I'm sure anyone that passed by who helped them would be an angel tbh, and even if the Mafia may be a frowned upon way to live, it's still better than dying or living on the streets waiting for their death. But yeah...this is a crappy situation for Lili, especially since apparently the women who used to be with Yang ended up dead or living a life worse than death because they "knew too much". But I'm honestly surprised that he would let them know anything, so I'm kinda assuming that these women were gathering this information rather than him showing it to them, but I guess the opposite could happen since I doubt Yang really cares about their lives anyway.

Sfogliatelle sounds super hard to pronounce! But omg, I've seen that pastry before but never tried it either, I can understand Lan and Fei's excitement towards Lili making it for them, so jealous🥺 Not sure if it matches with yumcha lmao but whatever rolls with them. Anyway, I love how even though Fei and Lan are Lili's guards, they genuinely love hanging out with her, it's just so sweet~ they have no obligation to care about her but I think the three of them rub off each other really well since they're all essentially quite simple and kind. Lmaoo when they told Yang about how Lili really likes pandas and she was embarrassed thinking it was childish, but then Yang pat her head and said she can like what she likes, and even suggested bringing a real one here for her hahahaha. Okay, so I tried to ignore what could have possibly happened to Elena, but it's terrible!! Lee's got her high on drugs and is basically taking advantage of that to do what he wants with her. Honestly, I kinda just hope when she initially got captured after trying to save Lili, she didn't get gang raped by the Lao-Shu men before getting to Lee since she obviously didn't have the protection Lili did, and Elena is really cute so...sigh, it's heartbreaking to see her like that, and for Lili to not be able to do anything about it because even though Lee is technically Yang's subordinate, he has his own ambitions and his own men, and Lili really can't do anything about him. I just feel so bad for Elena since he's obviously taking advantage of her sexually, sighhh, I hope Lili actually gets to save her later on.

Not gonna lie, that CG with Yang covered in blood after killing a drug addict was pretty hot. Even though Lili says that Yang could have easily dealt with the guy without killing him, which is probably true, I'm not sure about leaving crazed guys like these roaming around on the streets especially when she was nearly the target of one in the beginning, it honestly doesn't help that they're obviously violent enough and lacking any mental capacity to understand who they're attacking. I just feel like Yang is "cleaning up" his own territory in his own way tbh. And lol, okay, I was right hahaha. LOL, does Lan have Guan Yu's weapon? Yep, I googled, it is hahahah lmao, that's amusing I guess. LOL at Orlok asking Lili why she's Yang's woman, and says that the Bible has informed him that love makes people mad hahaahha, I'm not sure which part that is but I find it so funny how he's basically calling her crazy for being with Yang. I admit that I've been waiting eagerly to see Lili in a cheongsam/qipao dress but omg, I feel so sorry for her considering how revealing it is, and it's tight because it's Lan's size too like dang, not only must it be uncomfortable physically, but it's uncomfortable because all these Lao-Shu men are jeering at her trying to see her underwear. Not surprised Yang was so mad and pulled her out of the room lol, but I honestly feel for Lili, she didn't have a choice since Lan and Fei said they would kill her if she didn't wear it, and like obviously they were playing with her and they wouldn't do such a thing, but after realising that they're not really her allies and would always prioritise the Lao-Shu and Yang, I'm not surprised she would think so. I wanted to cry when she cried because she's basically been fearing for her life this whole time and Yang's mood changes are pretty unpredictable for her so she's definitely stressed, the poor girl🥺 Awww, Yang personally went to get Lili a proper cheongsam, and it was a white one with gold embroidery! I guess he likes how pure but elegant she is? Hahaha. Nice that Lan apologised to Lili about the dress and properly thanked her for the sfogliatella, the twins are so cute, I love them.

OMG LOL, Yang really ordered a stuffed panda toy from the mainland for her!! It literally rode a ship to come here just for her hahaha, it's so sweet and cute of him to do that (even though this particular panda toy is a bit ugly tbh lmao). I kinda wanna feel sorry for the guy who tried to give Yang info to save his family or something, but he betrayed the Visconti and told something important like where they were going to attack Yang, so not really lol. I just feel sorry for Lili having to see the guy die in front of her and have blood splattered over the food, yeah that's disgusting lol. Lmao when the twins got excited over Yang eating Lili's half-eaten bun hahaha. I also found it pretty cute how Lan noticed that Yang was only eating Lili's pastries out of all the desserts haha. It's actually pretty amusing how the twins introduce the tea of the day and Lili tells them what she baked for the day, yumcha for them always seems so peaceful lol. Tbh, I forgot about the human trafficking the Lao-Shu did so it was surprising to see a live trade of it, and pretty sad to think about all these women who were made to get addicted by drugs then sold off in Asia, it's just terrifying to think of. In a way, I wonder if it was a blessing for those women to have been killed due to Gil and Dante bombing the trade ship and burning it down... I feel sorry for Lili that Yang dragged her here to experience all this, but considering his reaction and stuff, it seems like he feels like he lacks what makes people "human", so he tries to bring Lili along to stuff to see her reaction and kind of want to see through her what is supposedly normal and what is not, what any normal person would be angry and what they wouldn't? Or maybe what he lacks is the ability to "feel" things? Since he seems to gauge things by whether they're "boring" or not, so I guess anything that makes him feel some sort of "emotion" is what drives him on to do what he does? Although for a guy that doesn't feel much for other things, he's very understanding and considerate towards Lili, but I guess it's also because he knows people's strengths and limits well. Omgggg the CG of Yang taking her hand and leaving the forest, is she wearing the white cheongsam?! It's so cute on her!! Must be super uncomfortable to walk in a forest with it though, I can see why she tripped at night, but honestly seeing this now, I would be surprised if she could keep up with Yang and them in that dress lolll.

Although I love how sexy their first time was, I'm surprised Lili gave herself to him already, like didn't she just realise she likes him?! I understand she's willing to offer herself to him if he'll save Elena but she herself also understood that saving Elena didn't just mean taking her away from Lee, it also meant that she needed to help her get off the drugs and willingly leave him and go back to "normal", so I feel like she just went too much with the flow with Yang lol. She's still confused about what kind of person he is and whether she wants to be with him, and yet she got mesmerised by him, which I guess in a sense can't be helped since he is pretty attractive haha, but c’mon human trafficking. Btw her white negligee was beautiful, Yang has good tastes in clothing~ but loll, he really likes white doesn't he. I have to agree with Yang, Lee as a "villain" was pretty boring and disappointing, I honestly thought he would be more interesting (especially since he's kinda pretty too~) but he turned out like such a basic villain that wanted to take over the Lao-Shu but was too weak and not calculative enough haha. On another note, I'm surprised Dante was killed rather easily by Yang, but anyway Dante really shouldn't have tried to corner him by himself. Anywayyy, I'm surprised Lili doesn't feel bad about it though, like I know she doesn't really know Dante (but then again, she didn't know those girls on the boat) but as Yang said, Dante lost/died to Yang because he was trying to "protect" Lili and not hurt her. So even if he may not be someone she can trust, I find it saddening that other than not liking seeing people die in front of her, she couldn't even give some sympathy for Dante who genuinely tried his best to not hurt her... And Dante is such a cinnamon roll so it's sad loll. I feel bad for Nicola though. Honestly, if I was Nicola, I would hate and want to kill Lili too, it's not like he cares about the Key Maiden thing anyway, and honestly from his perspective, I would be so mad that Dante died because of some silly girl enraptured by Yang and condones all the crap he does compared to Gil and Dante.

It's kinda funny and cute how she's so smitten with Yang that even though she thought about taking Elena back to the church, she never thought about returning even though it's her home lol. It's also kinda cute how sweet Yang has been to Lili, especially when he poured a drink for a subordinate that was insisting on Lili pouring it lmao, he was so intense about it😂 Pretty terrible for Nicola to hold the church kids hostage to lure Yang out, even if he's not planning to kill them, he's already mentally scarred them. I think it's really cute how Fei and Lan decided by themselves that they want to help because they understand the desire to protect their home, so even if Yang refuses to go, they'll go. I just hope nothing happens to them because I love the twins! Anyway, it's interesting of Lili to say that she couldn't believe the Falzone would do such a thing even though she decided that she couldn't put her trust in Dante before? Lol, like what do you really know about them Lili if you thought you couldn't trust them before? Gotta love how Lili was happy to hear Yang's confession, and how if she ever wanted to leave him before he got bored, he'd rather kill her than let her go lol! I like Yang, but dang I'm definitely more scared than swooning over it lmao. On another note, even though Lili's actions are irrational and she might come to regret it one day lol, I guess I can to an extent understand the idea of not accepting someone's actions but still loving them.

Anyway, why didn't Nicola and Gil band together to get rid of Yang? What was the point of Nicola trying to get rid of Yang himself at the church? That was such a waste, there's so many better opportunities to try and kill Yang without having to take such a huge gamble, not to mention that Nicola and them are at a great disadvantage against Yang when it's one-on-one. It's basically impossible for them to defeat Yang by themselves because they rely on guns and Yang has the agility and speed to dodge most bullets, and on the other hand, they're quite incapable of dodging Yang's weapon because of how unique it is and how strong Yang is. I'll say that Nicola and Gil were pretty silly for the best ending but I guess they needed to die in order for Yang's ambitions to succeed, so I guess it is fitting to call it Yang's best ending, but not really Lili's haha. But since she seems okay with it and just kinda rolls with all these deaths, she's pretty much complicit in it all now lol, like excuse me Lili, they killed so many people, so they did a "good job" and should get a nice dinner? Hahaha, she's totally living the Mafia life, I don't think she's a normal civilian anymore lol. I still love how much Fei and Lan are fond of Lili though, and always try their best to protect her. Going to London as their next destination sounds interesting but yeah, this is a very different holiday than it is with the other guys lmao.

Okay, in the good ending, Elena seems weirdly interested in who killed Lee, and she's weirdly "sane", so I guess she's more on the insane side? Haha. I always found it kinda frustrating that they never really talked about what happened to Elena, and it just kinda brushes it off and she kinda goes back to normal, so I'm a bit more happy now that they're addressing it here and showing that in a sense, Lee saved her from being drugged and transported back to the mainland where she would have then died. And it is pretty disheartening to hear that she was drugged to the point that she probably didn't even realise how much she was "used" by those men. Anyway, I feel sorry for Lan and Fei because they're very emotionally kind people, they're just where they are because of their circumstances and because of Yang. As for Elena... I feel sorry for Lili, but I guess in a sense it's true that you can't really save everyone...even though she tried. Because of her, Lan probably died so I don't really feel sorry for Elena anymore. On the other hand, Yang dying because he hesitated to kill Lili along with Gil was pretty saddening. He always says he doesn't really care about her thoughts and feelings and only selfishly wants her, but in the end, he was the one who loved her the most. Lili doubted him and his love a lot in this ending and Yang himself probably doubted his own feelings too, so it's kinda saddening to see it all turn out like that. Honestly, I don't know which part of this ending was good though LOL, it was definitely much more bittersweet, but yeah I quite liked it and it probably flowed better than the best ending too haha. I guess it's good in the fact that now the Visconti kinda rule/take care of Burlone and get along well with the Falzone? Hahahaha. Guess it's a good ending for the masses lol!

Anyway, I feel sorry for the Yang in the tragic ending, is this what happens when he indulges in Lili? He lets his guard down? Omgg btw, there's so many nice kiss CGs with Yang! Love how Yang carried her around jumping across buildings or something lmao. Yang arriving like a prince on the balcony is so beautiful, I love it🥺🥺🥺 but it's so weird of Yang to do all that hahaha. Is it supposed to allude to Romeo and Juliet? Hahaha. Honestly, Yang is so sweet to make a commotion just so he can see her, I'm dying, my heart is so full🥺 Ooh, I love this tragic ending! I especially like that it didn't go as I thought it would (Yang dying), instead Lili died because Yang used her as a shield to kill Dante. It's quite saddening that Lili still loved him even as she died😭 It was also kinda nice to see that despite Yang sacrificing her, he does regret it to an extent and I think I kinda like tragic it is in that sense. I always feel so sad when the twins die, sigh, but I'm just glad they got to die together. I like the variety of bad endings, I knew there would be one where Yang would get bored of her and give her to the other members, but yeah that was pretty hard to stomach imagining her life from then on... Anyway, I really enjoyed the short story, it was so cute how Yang made Lili braid his hair, and loll when he kept making excuses that it was annoying to braid but didn't want to cut it lol. Lmao in the extra story (after the best ending) when Yang got angry over the gentleman guy kissing the back of her hand, and Lili told him it's normal, and Yang's like you're a cheater😂😂

Overall, I really loved Yang and his route. Some parts of it are iffy in terms of stuff like how Lee and his part was more boring than he looked, how our Mafia bosses seem to make silly decisions just to make it the "best" ending and how Lili kinda throws all sense out of the window because of love, but I still loved it. Honestly, I'm not usually a fan of characters like Yang who would kill girls like the heroine at the drop of a hat depending on his mood, but he was so hot, I could see why Lili was mesmerised, especially Okamoto Nobuhiko's voice omggg🥺 I relished listening to Yang talk all the time because it really captured the type of guy he was, seductive, dangerous but enrapturing. I also loved how Yang never really "changed" for Lili, he didn't suddenly become a better person, she didn't suddenly become a "bad" person (although she did compromise a lot of things to be with him I guess lol), but they still worked out because they liked each other and did things for each other that warmed their hearts. He's the Mafia guy I wanted all this time hahaha! A terrible guy in real life but great in otome😂 I guess there's something about ruthless and dangerous guys doing stuff like giving stuffed panda toys to girls that make me swoon lmao. Yang was such a playful flirt, it was fun. Oh and omg, I honestly think Fei and Lan really made this route so much more fun too, I love the twins. They're so cute, deadly but also super kind, I loved their companionship and honestly think they're probably the best subordinate/secondary characters compared to the other characters in the other Mafia groups. It was also nice to see a different perspective to the normal Mafia dynamic that Dante and Gil have, since Dante and Gil are respected for either their kindness or their charisma, but for Yang, it's the fear he instills and his strength, it was good to see dodgy subordinates too lolll. Anyway, I really loved the tragic ending so much because seeing Yang deny he loves Lili whilst constantly thinking about her and in a sense regretting he killed her is just so tragic and interesting. Oh and the CGs are so good with Yang!! It was so hard to pick ones to be my absolute favourite😭

#piofiore fated memories #piofiore no banshou

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purplesurveys · 4 years ago

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1171

survey by ohsh1t2wksl8

What Rhymes With “AB”?

1. Do you have nice abs? Do you know anyone who has nice abs? Andi works out and they like sharing with me their progress every month. They’re turning out to have great abs. 2. Do you blab other peoples’ secrets? Do you like to gossip? I’d still join in if it were about something juicy, tbh. But those years are also far behind me for the most part; I like taking part in wholesome gossip these days, like if someone from high school gave birth or found a better relationship to be in. 3. Have you ever ridden in a taxi cab before? Where to? Yes, we’ve had to take taxis to the airport a few times. I never understood why; for the next few trips after that we used our car to get to the airport anyway, so those couple of rides were weird. I can tell you it’s not very convenient being squished in a sedan with 5 people, with all our bags to boot. :( I’ve also had to take cabs in Singapore, China, and Korea when we went. 4. Do you know anyone who’s caught crabs? Probably. I just wouldn’t be aware of it. 5. Have you or someone you know ever had a hermit crab as a pet? One of my colleagues from college, Hannah, owns a couple of hermit crabs.

6. Do you know how to dab? I guess. I’ve just never willingly done it. 7. Do you have any clothing that looks drab? I don’t think so. If not black, most of my clothes are in muted, calm shades, but not dull or depressing ones. 8. Do you use abbreviations in place of longer words? Do you ever refer to something as “fab”? Not abbreviations, but shortcuts. I always call delivery fee ‘deli fee’ instead. And some people my age would usually call Starbucks ‘Starbs.’ 9. Does you body have any excess flab? Where? Yeah, my upper arms will jiggle a bit if I shake them. 10. Who do you know that likes to gab a lot? What do they go on and on about? My mom is insanely talkative and will go through 5 backstories before proceeding to her actual story. 11. When’s the last time someone jabbed you with a needle? No one’s ever done it to me on purpose (and that’s very crappy??) but I’ve stabbed myself in the palm a few times while I’ve been embroidering. I haven’t gotten back to it for several months now, though. 12. Did you have a science lab class during school? Yeah, we had separate lab classes in high school. I liked them, since it was fun to be more hands-on instead of just spending 45 minutes listening to lectures and staring at the blackboard. I especially enjoyed when we were allowed to mix chemicals, heheheh. 13. Have you ever nabbed something from a store before? What was it? We accidentally stole a box of crayons from a bookstore once. No one noticed my mom still had it in her hand until we walked out of the store haha. We immediately went back inside and either paid for it or put it back on its shelf, I don’t remember which. 14. Do you know anyone who’s been to rehab? What were they in for? I don’t think so. But this is also keeping in mind that the Philippines is a shitty country with no decent rehab centers because most people believe that those with addiction problems don’t deserve a second chance at life. 15. How many backstabbers have you cut from your life? Just one. I’ve been careful ever since that person. 16. Do you pick at your scabs? Sometimes. 17. What’s the last slab of meat you’ve eaten? I had a few pieces of pork in the jjajangmyeon I ordered last Thursday. I don’t think I had meat at all yesterday. 18. Is anything in your house looking shabby? No, my mom is very particular about cleanliness and she’ll immediately fix up a area she thinks is starting to look shabby. 19. When’s the last time you felt crabby? Why? I’m usually crabby every morning at the start of my shifts, just because I always feel tense about the flood of deliverables that would inevitably come to me; though I do start loosening up once I’m able to figure out my schedule and time management for the day. 20. Who’s the last person you wanted to stab? What did they do in order to make you feel that way? One of the clients I handle. He was onboarded just this January but we quickly learned that he’s very hard to work with; and my team actually received news super recently that he’s gonna be let go of/is willingly resigning because of the challenges in ways of working. I’m soooo relieved. It was a tornado as soon as he came in. 21. How many tabs are open on your internet browser right now? Continued 8 hours later. On this current window, 10 tabs. I have other windows open though. 22. Has anyone ever tried to get grabby with you when you didn’t want them to? I don’t know what this means...but based on what I saw on Google, does this also mean possessive? If that’s correct, then yeah, it’s happened before. My ex was super suspicious of guys and didn’t like my guy friends for no reason at all, which I found disturbing. 23. What would you put on a Krabby Patty? Oh god, I would just go for the recipe they already show on Spongebob. I would honestly go for the King-Size Ultra Krabby Supreme double batter-fried on a stick though; that looked craaaaazy good on TV. 24. Do you know anyone named Abby? That’s my mom’s name. 25. Do you have one of those grabber claws that helps you grasp things that are out of reach? Not anymore, but we had a toy like that when we were kids. 26. Do you like to play Scrabble? Are you any good at it? I do like playing Scrabble. I think I do pretty well in word games in general, but I think I got even better at Scrabble since I took an actual class on it, so I learned a lot of rules and tricks to be able to win. 27. Is it cute when babies babble? What do you think they’re trying to say? It’s cute but it’s not at the top of my list. I’m guessing they’re just excited about everything since it’s all new to them. 28. What’s the last thing you dabbled in/with? Livetweeting after SO FUCKING LONG. I don’t think I’ve done it in like 6 or 7 years...doing it all over again was such a thrill, and it was as exciting as it had been from when I was a teenager. 29. Do you have any dividers or folders with any tabs on them? Just on my laptop haha, nothing physical. 30. Did your parents keep close tabs on you when you were a teenager? Initially, but they gradually let go the older I got. 31. How high has your bar tab been? Idk, maybe a little over ₱3000? I remember how my friends and I ended up buying a crap load of pitchers and bar food from our usual bar once since we ended up really enjoying our time there. 32. Have you ever made jewelry out of the silver tabs on soda cans? Nope. [a-zebra-is-a-striped-horse]

#survey #surveys

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gilmesc1 · 4 years ago

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Do you have any thoughts on fictional portrayals of DID, like danganronpa, spl!t, and others?

Yes, I usually would take time to do research but lucky for you I already did XD

I looked into Danganronpa a while ago since we have 1 or 2 system mates from it, and in that case, prepare yourselves for a hot mess of my opinion and facts I got from a google fest.

So, to start out, I guess I might share spoilers?? So you hath been warned. Additionally I’m not going to sit here and rephrase the entire story so, honestly why am I even explaining this. Anon at least knows what’s going on XDD

So Danganronpa is a psychological mystery anime that focuses heavily on the themes of hope and despair, where in most versions of the story characters are forced into a killing game where they have to kill each other. Bet you couldn’t have figured that one out on your own XD

One thing I like about it is that the characters overall are written fairly well. Many of them are complex multi layered gems of writing with good development and story arcs. One thing that I found interesting is the semi accurate portrayals of mental illness and how it impacts the characters in this insane situation.

So, let’s break into that. I focused on the portrayals of NPD and DID specifically, and I could go back and look into others, but we’ll focus on those for this post. And just going to throw this out now, I think it’s interesting and also kind of a bold move to tackle those kinds of things in an anime.

So let’s look at the DID portrayal. The character’s name is Toko Fukawa, and she is a fucking wreck. Confirmed emotional abuse gives a lot into her character, and we see her as this timid, deflective, honestly broken shell. Later in the series we are introduced to her alternate personality, I know, exciting.

However it’s a literal serial killer. So like. Yeah.

I don’t love that part. I mean, out of all of the portrayals for this alter, you had to go with serial killer? And not only that, but a really famous, generally acknowledged as insane serial killer. Thaaaanks writer.

To recap what a lot of tumblr says, this kind of portrayal is dangerous because the majority of DID portrayals are of crazy violent stereotypes. It was quite honestly disappointing, and I wish that the writers hadn’t used this as their big reveal.

But hey, neutral standing here, let’s look at why he did do that from a different perspective. Since the theme of the game/anime is killing, it does make sense plot wise to have a serial killer. Additionally, it’s a clever way to get said serial killer into the game in the first place. Plot wise and with a few things I’ll mention in a second, it does make sense in a twisted way.

But let’s get the bad out of the way first. One thing I really don’t love is her appearance. It’s like someone took the original character design of fukawa, took some drugs, and then drew a nightmare creature. Seriously, there’s crazy eyes, hair flying everywhere, and this freaky inhuman tongue that the alter has out no matter what she’s doing. Like whaaaaaat the fuck.

Firstly this spreads misinformation that we can change appearance at will. Like don’t get me wrong, I wish I could, but the best I got is changing clothes if I have the time. Also the tongue I really hate because it gives the impression of the alter being this inhuman monster. Also again with the impression that we can morph stuff when we switch. I mean, if I had that, I’d be having a lot more fun in my day to day life than I do now.

Do what you will with that information.

Additionally we do see Fukawa’s tongue, and it’s not a weird demogorgon kind of thing, so, yeah, the tongue thing is weird.

Finally her name. It’s Genocider Syo/Jack/Jill. Not a normal name, no the only name we have for her is her serial killer name which I feel serves to continue to show her as this inhuman thing where we all go, Oh god oh fuck time to be afraaaaid.

But hey, let’s look at what they did right.

The backstory of how genocider came to be is really accurate to how it works. Fukawa has a history of abuse at a young age, and genocider eventually comes into the picture to protect her.

Let me explain: So this is a theory on my part (Check out Weeby Newz’s youtube video, that’s where I got this) but Fukawa was revealed to have suffered massive emotional abuse at the hands of a boy who she had romantic interest in. Since he was moving away, she decided to confess her love to him in a letter before this happened. Turns out the boy pinned the letter in her classroom so everyone would make fun of her. Dick move.

I think genocider formed after this specific event, firstly because this is a huge defining experience for Fukawa. Additionally, the way genocider acts serves to prove this. Her target victims are boys, and her first victim was the boy who hurt Fukawa. I mean yeah, killing was waaaay extreme, but bear with me on this next part:

I’d say that genocider is a protector. A lot of her initial actions were to protect Fukawa from getting hurt in the same way, and protectors do have a history of going to the extreme to protect their hosts and systems. Even though she seems like a persecutor, I don’t think any of her actions have been directed at herself and Fukawa, they actually seem to have a decent relationship, and to end this theory that is completely non canon and just me pretending I’m smart, I’d call her a protector.

Next, looking at the relationship they have. Genocider at one point tells the protagonist that they have a “non disclosure policy” when they switch when the other is in the middle of something. (like murder??) And I personally really liked this, as it was a kind of realistic DID humor in my eyes. Take it or leave it, that’s my opinion.

And that’s really all I have on that behalf. Genocider really isn’t shown as a “normal person” often, which I guess is the point but also leaves me with nothing to evaluate. (Side note, this is only V1 of the series and I’m aware she changes but dear god go easy on me)

Finally, here are a few things that I find a little weird tbh.

At first glance when they switch, it’s a touch accurate, if over dramatic. Losing consciousness and coming to as a different alter is possible so I do like that, however they also have her constantly switching when sneezing, which is a little out there.

I mean, I think I’ve done that before, but for it to be a consistent theme, idk. Maybe overdramatized again.

Secondly, there is a voice change, which is accurate, but it really just serves to fit the crazy image, so I’m conflicted on that.

So that is really all I can say on that specifically, to end things I’m going to talk about one other character Fukawa has interactions with, Togami. (He has a first name but I can’t spell/remember it.)

So I gravitated towards him while watching the series because he reminds me of me, hence me saying that he seems to be a dead ringer for npd. Let me explain.

He’s very cold and distant from others and obviously feels superior, additionally he is willing to fight tooth and nail to consistently be on top and win in any situation, leading to him doing some fucked up things.

But like I feel for him. It’s like watching me XD

His past was a very competitive cuthroat environment, where he was taught that losing is worse than death. Additionally he was almost groomed to be this untouchable figure so it’s no surprise that he believes that. I might make a second post about him because there’s a lot more I can say, but I’m going to double back to Fukawa now.

So Fukawa gains a very unhealthy obsession with Togami, despite him wanting literally nothing to do with her. He’s verbally abusive to her and does go out of his way to attack her, but she thinks it’s a sign of love. Poor Fukawa.

This also kind of fits with NPD, because we can have some pretty gravitating personalities. I think the attraction has a lot to do with Fukawa’s mental state, but I just found it interesting that the emotional abuse victim gravitates to Togami of all people.

So I brought him up for that above thought I had, and also to compare this last point. So Fukawa was confirmed to have DID, like it was specifically stated. To my knowledge it was never stated that Togami has NPD, but I strongly assume that he does. (key word assume, I could be wrong.)

So I found it interesting that Togami has this very accurate portrayal of NPD without ever confirming that he has NPD, while Fukawa is specifically confirmed to have DID while having a semi accurate portrayal. I think the writer really wanted to include mental illness in his story line and I doubt he intended anything to be intentionally harmful.

Writing mental illness into a story is very very very tricky, and it’s practically impossible to satisfy everyone, but the fact that he did do it is in my opinion, very bold.

He made good and less good choices, but overall he did make very compelling characters. Genocider admittedly fits better in this plotline as a crazy killer than she would as a realistic alter, but this is fiction.

So final statements: Toko Fukawa is not a bad character. I like a lot about her and overall I think she is very well written. Genocider is very less developed and more of a surprise plot twist than a character, which is unrealistic. The writer made some very awkward choices from a realistic standpoint despite it fitting well with his story.

So overall, she really isn’t a good portrayal of DID. You can enjoy her character like I did, but the main takeaway here is to not take her as a realistic portrayal. I know it seems obvious but this is the kind of thing that forms unhealthy ideas in viewers.

I’m not hating on Danganronpa or Toko, I actually really loved both. I’ve tried to stop ranting about fictional works that I hate. I used to be a loose fucking canon but I realized that I had been bashing a few autistic friend’s special interests, so now I try to be hyper aware that a fictional work might mean everything to someone even if I personally disliked it.

But that isn’t the case here because again I loved Danganronpa XD

So friends, that about does it for me. I liked doing this kind of analysis so if you want me to do more, send them my way XD

My next post will probably be the syscourse analysis if I can get that done before I get an easier topic. So thanks for reading, hope you enjoyed, thank you for the ask anon.

And I’m now out of words. You all should be happy. XD

#did #did tag #dissociative identity disorder #actuallydid #actuallymultiple #actuallydissociative #actuallytraumagenic #danganronpa #toko fuwaka

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yellow-r-o-s-e · 5 years ago

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NEURODIVERGENT

There’s definately something wrong with Roman. He just wants to know what it is

Word Count: About 4500

Warnings: lots of talk of assorted mental illnesses, including PTSD, depression, anxiety, and anorexia, pretty detailed description of a panic attack, self deprecating feelings, mentioned past abusive relationship, imposter syndrome, implied gaslighting, let me know if there’s anything else I need to put, I don’t know how to do this, there is a happy ending but please be safe

Notes: This is a fanfic of the wonderful “Love and Other Fairytales” by @tulipscomeinallsortsofcolors. It’s technically a Sanders Side fanfiction, but you don’t need to know anything about Sanders Sides for her story to make sense. It’s a really amazing modern fairy tale, and I would highly recommend it to anyone who somehow hasn’t read it yet. Also the story below probably won’t make any sense without the context.

In her story, a few of the main characters (Virgil and Logan) are autism coded, which I can relate to a lot with my ADHD, and I ended up projecting said ADHD on a different character, Roman Gage. It’s a bullet fic because it’s so long it would take me a week to write it all out, and also it’s very self-indulgent and I put my own self-insert OC in because noone can stop me from having fun. Not edited because we die like men. Enjoy!

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It starts on what should be a perfect day. It’s early September, Logan is off at a “fairy” lesson with Virgil. It’s not too humid anymore, it’s cooled down just enough to be comfortable. And Roman thinks it would be a perfect day for hunting in the woods

Except as soon as he thinks about hunting, he thinks about h i m and he’s suddenly nauseous

But it’s fine, Roman’s fine, besides he has lots of people to talk about it with now. His bfs know and are supportive, and Mamaw knows too now. He doesn’t even miss Dee that much…

And oh mother gothel he does not feel good he needs to think about something else

He suddenly remembers that he is in fact currently having a picnic with Patton and he should focus on that

And he’s aware that Patton just asked a question but he doesn’t know what Patton asked, And he feels really bad but he just smiles and asks Patton to repeat himself

He wishes he could actually pay attention to his bf the first time but life hates him apparently, and Patton’s talking very slowly and carefully because his lessons are helping but he’s still afraid of hurting Roman. And heck if that doesn’t make Roman feel even worse

Anyways, Patton says he’s concerned that Roman hasn’t eaten anything, and offers to go somewhere else for food if Roman doesn’t want picnic

And Roman just laughs and says he’s fine, he just ate a big breakfast. Except. He didn’t eat breakfast at all. He doesn’t know why he said that but now he’s panicking inside as he continues to talk to Patton on the surface level. He’s not trying to not eat on purpose, he’s just really not hungry much

So he’s very worried about himself now as he realizes he’s been skipping meals like crazy recently. He knows he’s not anorexic because like, it’s not intentional. He just keeps forgetting his body needs food to survive??? Is that a normal thing to happen???

Ten minutes maximum pass before he’s spilling all of this to Patton because he’s Very Worried and they’re trying to be more open with each other anyways

And Patton, who’s already been worried about Roman since the whole ’planning to die to save his friends without telling anyone’ thing, is like “have you considered speaking to a doctor”

Roman’s like “Mamaw hates the physician” and then Patton reminds him he’s an actual adult and long story short a few days later he’s having a meeting with Dr. Sherwood

He’s being asked all the standard questions and he’s just realizing ‘oh no, there’s definitely something wrong with me’. He’s having trouble sleeping, trouble eating, trouble focusing, things that used to make him happy don’t anymore…. And Dr. Sherwood says he probably has depression

Which honestly makes a little too much sense after all the heartbreak and loss and isolation and abuse and whatnot

He gets officially diagnosed shortly after

There’s no therapist in Wickhills but Dr. Sherwood offers to prescribe antidepressants

But antidepressants can be very finicky and Roman’s not in immediate danger or anything so he figures he’ll just try Mamaw’s potions and whatnot for now and maybe change later

He’s very afraid to tell Mamaw but surprise, she’s not mad at all. Well, she’s a little upset that he thought he had to sneak away to go to the doctor

They talk, and depression treatment is a lot more complicated than just a quick spell but they agree to be more honest with each other when they’re having bad days (because May’s physical health is not doing great either)

He talks to the bf squad too, and he feels guilty telling them for some reason. He doesn’t want to be someone for them to take care of, y’know, he wants to be the one taking care of them

They’re all like “Roman shut up you’re beautiful and talented and amazing and we love you”. Patton reminds him that he literally planned the picnic they just had. And the entire summer he was like, stargazing or serenading or painting with one of them at least once a week

They remind him that it’s okay for the roles to reverse every once in a while. It's literally not healthy to never ask for help, even if you don’t have depression

He’s already been unofficially working with Patton’s parents for a while and he has a long talk with the Wallers about it and 1) it’s not like they could replace him if they wanted 2) they still want to keep an eye on their son’s bf and learn more about what he’s doing (He doesn’t actually let much slide but they can hope) and 3) they’re nice people

so they work on making his hours flexible but not too flexible so he can miss work if he’s not feeling good but he still feels needed and has responsibility. It’s a struggle but everyone’s doing their best

Plus the Wallers are practically trying to adopt Roman in their son’s absence so it’s not like they wouldn’t be doing this anyway

And Roman starts to feel, not great, but more in control of his life at least

And there are always the good days, it’s almost always good when he visits his bfs, he starts liking acting again more, he starts getting excited about musicals again

And now that he’s a knight and he’s making good memories with Virgil, the woods aren’t making him feel icky anymore

And all the squad talk to him and promise to not undercut his happiness when it’s there. They work to not overreact when he’s surprised to be happy, and tell him he’s never annoying, he’s always free to ramble about whatever he’s excited about

And soon he’s looking into theater college applications, and he’s hanging out with Thomas and Remy, and he sees some touring Broadway shows (Wicked, The Lion King and Mary Poppins) in Cleveland, and Bell and him and sometimes Virgil are hunting in the woods again, and he’s a knight which is amazing, and he has self-confidence again,

And Logan found a perfect college which Roman is very happy about, seeing as he’s the one who did THAT to get Logan a chance to go to college a while ago. And Logan invites Roman to go on his college visit with him (along with Thomas). And Roman does feel a bit guilty because he feels like the only reason he was invited is because of the whole fae deal

But it’s fine, he’s happy to be going with Logan anyways

Virgil says he’ll be fine with Patton, they manage to find a flight that won’t go over any rivers (they don’t know what would happen but they don’t want to risk it). They’re all packed up for a few days and Logan is so happy he’s glowing

Roman can’t stop smiling either tbh, he just nods and listens to Logan rambling about how cool the greenhouses are. And it’s perfect

Until suddenly,,, it’s not???

Because the airport is Too Loud, which he tries to ignore

And something deep inside of him is afraid of Logan being away for so long because he’ll miss him but he ignores that too, it’s just excitement probably, right?

And then the plane takes off, which makes Logan a bit nauseous but it’s super fun for Roman, it’s basically a rollercoaster, right? He gives lots of comforting forehead kisses and Thomas is jokingly like ‘ew affection’

But then?? The seat belt buckled signs are still on? And Roman cannot move?

He’s trapped in the seat, trapped in the plane

Cannot

Move

And it’s So Loud all of a sudden. And he doesn’t even realize he’s frozen until he’s calming down and Logan is Squishing him

And they talk about that a bit and claustrophobia is normal it’s fine

And the trip goes pretty well. Actually, no, it was better than pretty well. Logan found his college and it’s perfect and Roman needs to stop being so Selfish and judging the trips success by his own experience

But Roman is still just worried about Logan leaving, what if he ends up hating the school? What if he gets trapped?

And he’s having flashbacks to the college visit before that ended terribly. Because he still hasn’t really forgiven himself for how upset Logan was when he got locked out of Wickhills after brief freedom. And he Does Not want to hurt Logan again

And then the intrusive thoughts start coming and he can’t stop them. And he’s worried about a ton of things that would never happen

What if Dee’s curse is still there somehow and when they get back Logan’s locked out of Wickhills?

That doesn't even make sense, stop-

What if Logan doesn’t actually want to go to college and he’s just faking because he feels bad for Roman, and he’s going to be miserable here?

Logan can’t even lie and why would he do that?

What if- stop

What if- Stop!

And this has definitely been happening for a while, he realizes, it’s just been much harder to ignore on the trip, where he can’t just block out the thoughts by picking apples (not that that works very well either)

So he talks with Logan and Thomas on the plane ride home and then he does a few google searches while waiting for luggage when they get back

And he’s now 100 percent sure that he’s been having anxiety attacks and/or panic attacks, like, several times a day

And he sees the doctor very shortly after getting back into town

It takes him 20 minutes to get diagnosed with general anxiety

Dr. Sherwood asks ‘is this happening very frequently?’ and Roman asks how often frequently is and it’s about once a week apparently. Which is laughably low compared to Roman. So now he knows that he has both depression and anxiety

His family and bfs know and they’re doing their best to supportive

Roman has a whole bunch of exercises he can do

So now it should be better, he knows what’s going on, right?

But he doesn’t feel any better At All. In fact, it seems to be getting worse by the day

And a lot of Roman’s panic attacks are just him being afraid he’ll have a panic attack and then be a burden. Which is so dumb and cyclical and he knows his bfs won’t be mad but that doesn’t stop it from happening

At least Logan and Thomas know how to deal with panic attacks and help him. And the bf squad all learns they can tell him when he’s being unreasonable. But the trouble is sometimes he absolutely knows he’s being unreasonable and he keeps doing it

He tries to go on meds for a cool minute but he doesn’t get better he just gets exhausted. And May’s potions are more personally suited to him anyways. Not that he’s good about taking those either

But it’s fine he’s strong he can handle it it’s fine it’s okay

Cut to a few months later around late winter

There’s a bright moon, the woods are all quiet, and it’s honestly just so soft and relaxing. And Roman’s enjoying being a knight and chilling with Bell and Virgil

There’s not even anything bad happening that they need to deal with, or anything to hunt down, they’re just kind of chilling in the woods on horseback

Bell’s catching Virgil up on fairyland happenings that he missed because he pays more attention to Patton than the actual court; Roman’s catching him up on what Logan and Elliot are up to

And then, it’s such a small thing, it shouldn’t ruin there night or even pause it, But as they’re laughing and Roman playfully punches Bell and Virgil rolls his eyes

This absolutely harmless garter snake rubs against Roman’s leg

And he’s just instantly Not Okay At All

And Virgil notices immediately and just glares back to see what hurt Roman, thinking some idiot fae with a death wish played a trick on him

Virgil’s really angry but trying to look calm for Roman and he meets eyes with Roman for half a second

Roman sees something incredibly familiar in his eyes and now he’s Even Worse

Virgil takes a very limp and frozen Roman who’s smiling a little too blankly and agreeing with everything V says back to fairyland and is talks to him soothingly but it takes Roman a very long minute before he’s even talking

And Virgil’s just a complete mess

And when he finds out that it wasn’t someone hexing Roman or anything, it was just his a snake that wanted to move and V’s stare, he just switched to exhausted

There might be a bit of crying on both of their parts but don’t tell anyone

And Roman wants to talk more but his voice isn’t working and he’s stuttering a lot

And every question Virgil asks about his comfort (do you want me to call the others? Do you want me to take you home?) makes Roman even more stressed so eventually he ends up snuggling with Roman in that bed for the night

And Bell checks in on them later and is very obviously a part of the Kill Dee Again squad

It had been like 2 months since Roman had the nightmares and he’s never had panic attacks like this before, he doesn’t know what’s happening

He doesn’t know why Dee’s still haunting him? What did he do wrong when he tried to forget him?

He has nightmares but Virgil’s afraid to wake him up, he might completely break down again, and Virgil doesn’t even know what he’d say anyways

He doesn’t think breaking down sobbing again would help

Roman wakes up in the morning just exhausted and starts crying again anyways

He tries to talk but it goes badly so he ends up communicating with Virgil through writing, which is much easier, though his hand is shaking and the paper is tear stained

And Virgil’s just absolutely heartbroken by how helpless Roman looks

Roman tried to apologize for not being able to talk but Virgil points out that he and Logan have trouble talking without thinking first for fae reasons and so does Patton, Roman isn’t going to be a burden on the group by being the same as everyone else

And Logan comes in lead by Bell

And he’s the calm that the other two need right now

He’s stressed too obviously but he translates his stress into logical thinking

And the word PTSD comes into the conversation for the first time

So guess who gets another diagnosis? Our boy

He finds out that PTSD symptoms often take a while to show up, he hopes it will disappear again but who knows

Not him

And the symptoms cross over (avoidance, sluggishness, panic) so it ends up replacing the other two diagnoses

So that means that he doesn’t have depression and anxiety after all??? It was just PTSD?

And Roman blindly agrees because these appointments are becoming habitual

But it doesn’t feel right?

Because there’s still something about him that feel distinctly Not Normal that PTSD itself can’t explain

Because some of his restlessness, unhappiness, recklessness, has existed since before he made the deal

So he feels like he might be faking PTSD because it can’t possibly ALL be caused by Dee

And be feels like he’s being unfair to Dee and heck if that’s something he can just say to his bfs without them getting on his case

He knows it’s dumb so it shouldn’t be a problem anyways

Hahahahaha

On a different note he’s still not sleeping anywhere near a normal amount

Dizzy says it’s because “Night Roman” screwed up his sleep schedule

Then there’s also the nightmares

And the lingering feeling that he’s slacking off while sleeping, he should be working on something else

So he talks to Dizzy and does research and he’s not sure if it counts because of his strange specific situation, but he decides he has insomnia in some way or another

And that’s an easy fix with potions (it’s not, they don’t work for long)

And then, before he can blink, he’s in college, and school is a thing

And he Loves acting, he Loves all the literature, he Loves picking his own classes and making new theater friends and speaking other languages with people

But then, during the “actual classroom classes” it’s not good all the time

There is something deeply uncomfortable about being stuck in a chair for multiple hours

Where you have to be somewhat quiet and pay attention to what the teacher is talking about

Like, you have to go at Their Speed, not yours

And he realizes that maybe it’s been like that for a while

Maybe it was his year off that made him realize it, maybe Wickhills is just that different

But he doesn’t like doing his general ed classes

Which is weird because he loves learning

And he’s super focused most of the time, but sometimes he just can’t hear the teachers?

And he remembers homework perfectly UNLESS he writes it down

And he can’t convince himself to do math and science homework no matter how hard he tries but he doesn’t tell anyone just pretends he’s purposely ignoring it

Oh and also whenever people criticize his acting or essays it’s physically painful but that’s probably not a big deal

Oh and schedule changes are the literal worst thing to ever happen in his life

So he thinks he might have hearing problems which is why he misses that they have homework or can’t hear people talking no matter how hard he tries

So he’s tested for hearing loss, tested for tinnitus and nothing

And then he realizes he sometimes struggles to read and write the correct way? He loves literature but he finds out that to other people, the words are not usually messed up like that

So he tries dyslexia, vision problems, dysgraphia, and still just nothing fits quite right

And maybe he’s making excuses and he’s actually just too dumb to be in advanced literature?

So he starts worrying that maybe he just wants to be special

Maybe he doesn’t have any mental illnesses, except just hypochondria

Except as soon as he starts considering hypochondria, OCD comes up

Because he feels incredibly, obsessively worried about everything

And there are times when he just has to do something other than pay attention and maybe those are compulsions

But maybe he’s wrong because the compulsions aren’t usually about fears, he just wants to wiggle around, click his pens, etc.

And that’s when he starts considering Tourettes

But that doesn’t work either because it’s not that severe, he’s way more able to resist impulses than he should be

And Tourettes wouldn’t explain enough anyways

So we’re like halfway through Roman’s freshman year and he’s just very confused?

Is he neurotypical? Does he have every mental illness ever? He doesn’t know

He still has a PTSD diagnoses but hasn’t been triggered as badly as that first time again, so he’s not even sure if he had That

And then Logan comes home for winter

And he’s very happily explaining how college is going in Maine

They already know lots but it’s fun to hear it in person

And Roman asks if anyone suspects he’s a fairy and if that’s causing problems and Logan says most people probably just think he’s autistic

And Roman is confused because that doesn’t seem at all?? related???

But Logan and Virgil start explaining autism and it does make a lot of sense and

Wait a minute is that what he is??????

So Roman just doesn’t freaking sleep for a week after Logan goes back to school because he’s researching autism nonstop

And it doesn’t feel right but he doesn’t know if it’s because of stigma or something else

It doesn’t feel like a bad word when he uses it to describe Logan but that could just be self deprecation he doesn’t know

And the ice cream bar model makes it really hard to tell because there’s so many options

And some of the symptoms are other mental illnesses

So he decides to just go with it for now, try it out as a label in his own head

He doesn’t tell anyone because that makes it more real and stressful and he’d feel guilty if he was wrong

But he starts using headphones to block out noise, gets himself some fidget toys to use in class, he learns that he likes certain stimuli and dislikes others (that’s not proof though that’s every single person, isn’t it?)

he starts getting better at writing conversations down first, bringing index cards actually makes him look smarter, not useless like he feared

So he still feels guilty because he’s pretty sure he’s not actually autistic and he doesn’t tell the boys

He can actually lie unlike some of the squad

And they’re all so used to getting “the world is too loud” from V and L that they don’t even realize something is different

Because remember, they’ve been hanging out with Roman for years, he’s always been restless and argumentative, and outside the college the main difference they see is he’s happier

So cut to a few months later

In some general ed class which Roman despises but that’s life

He’s partnered with the “smart girl” of the class, Serena Miller, on a group project

Which is very lucky because he has no idea what the heck is going on it’s way too theoretical for him

And she’s super patient, and they actually really click and they’re becoming good friends from they’re meetings

They’re hanging out more and more after school and she happily explains mathematical paradoxes and knot theory and he talks about the plots of different musicals

And they both just nod along half the time because they don’t completely understand, but the human interaction is very nice

And anyways Roman has this sudden realization that maybe she’s flirting with him and she’s just doing all of this with the expectation that they’re going to date

He just freaking blurts out “I’m gay and also taken” because God gifted him with chivalry, not subtlety, okay?

She’s confused and pauses for a second

Like “good for you but what does that have to do with three dimensional coordinate systems”

And he’s very awkwardly like “oh sorry I was afraid you were flirting with me”

She’s like “lol sorry for freaking you out, I just really like math, and I tend to latch onto other ADHD people because they’re just so much easier to talk to”

And Roman’s like what did you say???

So after a very long and repetitive conversation he realizes she’s ADHD and also 100 percent convinced he’s ADHD too

He says “wait a minute I don’t have ADHD?” and she’s not even like “oh you don’t?” she’s like “oh, you didn’t know?”

She’s still writing out math problems for the research as this is going on BTW she’s a fidgety girl

So, long story short they head off to a cafe to talk more without being in the middle of a library

And they meet up with a bunch of Serena’s friends, a lot of which Roman knows from theater

There’s Jaclyn Steele who played his love interest when their college did Footloose (they were Ren and Ariel)

And Aïsha Pérez who did a Romeo and Juliet monologue with him a while ago

And Gabriella Clay who’s absolutely going to be on Broadway soon, she already was on it as young Nala in the Lion King when she was thirteen, noone has any doubts that she’s going back

They talk about ADHD, how it’s not actually being unable to focus

ADHD people are actually very good at focusing on things a lot of the time, it’s just difficult to switch tasks

And they can experience sensory overload too

He finds out about RSD, which is a side effect of ADHD basically translates to “misinterpriting wjat people say to think they hate you” disorder, and that explains so many things

And it also has side effects of not being able to speak very well when stressed, so that explains a lot to

And he finds out that literally All of These Girls have ADHD???

No wonder they were so easy to hang out with?

They’re all on the same wavelength

He’s really afraid that having ADHD means he’s broken for a second, but Aïsha explains that it’s not even a mental illness, it’s just a neurodivergence

“Your brain doesn’t work worse than other peoples’ brains, it just works different”

And yeah, they agree it’s a lot like autism

Gabriella was actually misdiagnosed with autism when she was little so she talks a lot more with him about how similar they are

They end up having a sleepover in Serena and Gabriella’s dorm room

(Roman callshome to let Virgil and May know not to worry about him)

They’re all spread out on the floor with blankets, watching the office bloopers on a cracked Ipad until 5am and it’s the best Roman’s felt in weeks

And it’s not like he’s “cured” now but it feels so so so good to know he’s not alone

He ends up talking to Dizzy (who’s supportive but doesn’t understand exactly why Roman cares so much), then Mamaw (who’s happy for him if a bit confused by his excitement, he didn’t really tell her too much about the Search for a label), then the bf squad who’re mostly like ‘heck yeah none of us are at all normal’

And Patton’s not in desperate need of a diagnoses but he says he’s def not neurotypical, and he’s probably not allistic

Roman’s afraid of visiting the doctor again for fear of being denied a diagnosis

He doesn’t know what he’d do if he was told he was wrong

But Patton talks to Emile (with permission of course), and Emile gets help from his own Psychology professors and ends up doing 90% of the paper work and helping Roman with the exact criteria for diagnosis, so Roman has no doubts by the time he walks in to the hospital

Emile is also like oh that’s cool me too so that’s how Roman finds out that Emile is ADHD too

Eventually Roman does get an actually diagnosis and medication that works WITH his ADHD, not against it

And it turns out ADHD isn’t exclusive of the other things he considered, he probably did have actual PTSD and depression and anxiety and maybe more, but at least he has the root cause of so much of what makes him different

Emile also mentions there are a few other weird towns and offers to help get Roman a therapist who wouldn’t freak out about Wickhills

A few months later he ends up video conferencing Dr. Aaliyah Dixon from New Orleans and she doesn’t bat an eye at his talks about making a deal with the fae and having his memories magically separated

So he’s not “cured” by any means, but he knows who he is now, his boyfriends know how to help, he has college friends to bond with, and he’s absolutely not alone

#love and other fairy tales #sander sides fanfiction #roman sanders #adhd #mental illness tw #anxiety tw #panic attack tw #ptsd tw #self depricating thoughts tw #depression tw #i hope thats enough #just know it talks a lot about mental illness #and neurodivergence #its not anti autism or anti adhd but other things like depression and ptsd are actual nuissances so hopefully I managed to convey that #violet if youre reading this i love your fic youre the coolest

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mariangelpena · 5 years ago

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hello, everyone! my name’s leonie and it’s so lovely to be here. this here is my precious little bean mariangel who is a highkey squish obsessed with all things glittery and pink who’s trying to be a #doctor. my discord is ( emeravdes#9932 ) if you’re interested in plotting stuff w/her or just swinging by to chat! i have to go to bed because it’s like... midnight but i’ll be around tomorrow. later today. anywho! here’s more on mariangel! --- @frostfordstart

full name: mariangel itzel peña

nicknames: mari, mar, angel/angelito (mainly called this via her parents or her grandparents)

birthday: october 20th

current age: twenty two

sexuality: heterosexual, heteroromantic

personality (+): sweet, innocent, compassionate, brave, organized, cheerful, studios, hardworking, honest, grateful

personality (-): nosy, emotional, private, self-concious, assertive, gullible, passive

BRIEF FAM BAM BACKGROUND

mariangel is the youngest and fourth child of victor and marcella peña - both of which have lived in frostford for their entire lives. marcella’s family moved from tulum, mexico when marcella was still a baby and they spent a lot of time travelling around the US to different states before they found their way to frostford by pure change.

however, victor’s family had a bit of a longer story. mariangel’s grandfather - miguel angel - moved to the united states from oaxaca mexico in search of a better life for his family which consisted of his wife, Rosa, and their seven children. one of which was victor. after waiting almost five years for miguel angel to come back to mexico, rosa took matters into her own hands and chose to make the dangerous trip to the united states with her seven children in toe. thus came the peña family settling into frostford and branching out and establishing families of their own.

victor and marcella met while victor was in the army corps of engineers and eventually married and began to have their family. first came rafael and magdalena, followed by the adoption of their third son antonio and lastly the birth of mariangel. (names for her siblings are all placeholders since there’s a wanted connection out for them & calling them ‘my brother’ each time she mentions them would be... chaotic)

the peñas have a bit of a strange dynamic in the sense that some days they act closer than anything in the world whereas there are other days where they actually act like they hate each other. often times this makes mariangel feel like her siblings don’t like her - something she carries to this day.

THE EARLY YEARS, BAY-BEE

you know when a baby is born and they don’t really cry? just are a good baby who just wants to cuddle and be a ray of sunshine to their parents? that was the kind of baby mariangel was. the kind of child she was.

by the time that she was in kindergarten, she was the little girl who would go up to everyone she met and say hello, ask them how their day was going and then proceed to tell them about something she’d done during the day. the friendliest bean with the most infectious spirit.

was totally that little girl who followed around all her older siblings and cousins wanting to play or find out what they were doing. the nosiest nugget tbh.

however, when she turned 6, her parents told her that they were going to be moving and it was essentially something that crushed her heart at such an early age. she didn’t want to leave her friends behind and other people she’d come to know. she threw a whole ass fit the day they had set to move that victor had to find a way to get her tuckered out and asleep in order to get on the way.

little did she know that she’d be living in eight different states for the next ten years