#taz sazed

[overhatedcharacterspoll]

OVERHATED CHARACTERS POLL: Sazed (The Adventure Zone: Balance)

Feel free to explain your position in the comments or tags, but any harassment, over-the-top fighting, or personal attacks will result in you being blocked. Do not attack real people, be they fans or creators, over fictional characters.

Mod note: Well, it finally happened. I gave up on finding a proper image for this character. No official art coming up on Google, no fanart I could find on Tumblr. Use your imagination, I guess?

[goponylover]

So I was watching TAZ tiktoks and I saw the user @yesichangedmynamesorry had this idea in a comment section about an AU where Taako dies from the poisoning of Glamour Springs and Sazed takes his place in the campaign.

It immediately intrigued me and I thought about what it would look like if June offered him the Temporal Chalice and...well here you go!

[the-worm-wiggles]

Someone with The Eleventh Hour graphic novel Please show me what Sazed looks like

I've seen pictures of the Sizzle It Up Taako design but no Sazed

He was one of my favourite cosplays a couple years ago, I wanna see his comic design

[eyecosahedron]

I love the implications of the seven birds being from a more technologically advanced world than faerun (knowledge of TV, understanding of machine guns "count the shells", using microphones ect) because how many things was Lucretia not able to erase? Across 99 planes, it's impossible that she managed to get everything. And how well was she really able to introduce the more medieval concepts of faerun into their memories?

What did the THB think everyone was doing just waving swords around rather than pulling out guns; did they just accept it and move on? Imagine Lucretia trying to explain them to a weapons development department of the BoB to equip her employees. Lucretia, a records keeper, who cannot have a great understanding of the inner workings of firearms. Vaguely describing rectangles that explode to a reception of horrified looks.

Or Taako repeatedly asking Sazed to supply him with various kitchen utensils he insists are vital for the recipe that just Do Not Exist. Magnus, complaining that he can't play little games on his stone of farspeech, while everyone around is completely baffled at the concept. Everyone around them not only not getting their pop culture references, but being fundamentally incapable of understanding them.

I just think there is something so funny about them functionally time travelling and then promptly forgetting they were from a different era at all. And just. Having to get on with it.

[jerreeeeeee]

okay so i was going to post a poll on peoples' interpretations of taako & sazed's relationship but i went and looked back at the transcript of the chalice episode and i can't even post a poll because i just can't think of enough options that would actually be supported by the text?

its very very clearly a predatory apprenticeship where taako is getting free labor from sazed in exchange for teaching him, and then sazed begins to feel entitled to an equal share, at which point taako shuts him down and speaks to him in actually a pretty cruel way.

taako 'hired' sazed to be a driver and assistant and "general roadie" and i think it's perfectly fine for taako to not want him to be performing as an equal partner, but also, he was clearly taken advantage of. like sazed's proposition is an equal split of both the work and the "glory" and presumably the profit, which is a fair suggestion, but also fair for taako to turn down. but also taako was exploiting sazed's adoration in order to not pay him for his work.

i don't think that equal partnership was something taako ever even let on could be a possibility, he's pretty clear in the conversation he has with sazed that it's not something he's interested in and he "doesn't wanna keep having this conversation." its definitely something sazed really wants, but i don't think it was ever promised to him, it seems like something he's thought of that he's bringing to taako, who immediately shuts it down.

and as unfair as paying for a lot of work with cooking lessons is, it seems like that's what sazed agreed to, and it's also worth acknowledging that even though this is an arrangement i would consider unfair within my own cultural context, it could be considered completely normal and fair in faerun, like similar to a blacksmith's apprentice or something

so i guess the only questions are what sazed agreed to and why, and whether or not taako actually liked him or was just mean to him all the time. idk its all very interesting on its own let alone when compared to taako's later relationships with angus & ren, but not really open to as much interpretation as i’d thought

[anistarrose]

headcanon that under his home plane's calendar taako is a scorpio, but under the faerun calendar he's something else (maybe a gemini for the sheer irony), and that his absolute sheer confidence that he's a scorpio instigates an incredibly long-running argument with sazed about it

[baldswagsummit2023]

HELLOOOO BALD NATION!!! BALD SWAG SUMMIT 2 HAS ARRIVED.

HERE'S THE OFFICIAL BRACKET:

your first four matches ARE:

rufus the naked mole rat (kim possible) vs. benjamin sisko (star trek: deep space nine)

sazed (mistborn) vs. minerva (the adventure zone: amnesty)

monk gyatso (avatar the last airbender) vs. john locke (lost)

AND LAST BUT NOT LEAST...

jack box (jack in the box) vs. jack (jackbox tv)

POLLS WILL BE RELEASED TOMORROW AT 6:30AM CST.

may the baddest baldie win... AGAIN!

[earfgoddesss]

saw the new cover and immediatly thought-

[guthrie-odonto]

Ok can someone explain the whole Sazed/Phillipe situation to me? Like, is the name Sazed under copyright or something?

Edit: gif notified by someone on the discord but that doesn’t help since I have no idea what the fuck a Mistborn is

[me-myself-and-eyes]

thay changed sazed's name????

to philippe???

[sliceroftpeirweirisles]

Whumpuary 2024 Day 4

4. (Jan 07-08) "Help me" / Lightheaded / Kneeling

“I’m leaving.” 

Taako stares at Sazed as if he’s speaking a second language. They’ve stopped to take a rest after being on the run for two days straight. 

“I’m leaving, Taako. I can’t do this anymore.”

“You can’t do this?!” Taako hollers, standing his ground as best he can, given the circumstances. “I killed forty people!” 

“Yeah, and that’s exactly why I’m not stickin’ around!” Sazed shouts right back. 

“You said you would help me! You would be by my side through all this! What the fuck Sazed?! I need you! W-we need to try and–” 

“There’s no WE anymore, Taako!” Sazed cuts Taako off, only to have Taako double down. 

“Why the fuck do you think you’re not in this too?! You were there, people saw you!”

“No, don’t you dare turn this on me! You don’t want me in the show, why the fuck would anyone have seen me?! I'm not going down with your fucking drama!”

“You need me!” Taako screams, getting into Sazed’s face. “You’ve always needed me!” 

Sazed doesn’t give Taako another word before he reels back and slaps the elf across the face. Taako yelps and falls to the ground. There’s a heavy silence in the air as Taako scrambles to his knees. Sazed shakes out his hand, red from the hard contact, and sighs. 

“You always bring out the worst in me… So we’re done. I’m leaving.” Sazed turns to pick up his pack. “I hope you have a great life, fucker.” 

Taako leaned back, kneeling on the ground as he watched Sazed go. He should have figured Sazed would go. They always go. Everyone in his life just leaves eventually. 

“H-help me…” Taako whimpers quietly. He knows Sazed can’t hear that because he’s already out of sight. The tears that welled up in his eyes while Sazed was standing over him finally fall as Taako’s head lulls back. He’s kneeling, staring up at the sky, and sobbing openly. The gravity of everything that happened in the past few days hits him all at once. And he’s alone. He has no one to lean on, to help ground him. 

Sazed hears Taako’s wails echoing off the forest behind him.

Sazed smiles.

[goponylover]

Wanted to draw Sazed's (or "Phillipe" I guess) new design from the graphic novel. I added the horns and fangs because I've always headcannoned him as a tiefling and I'm not ready to let that go.

Basically Taako tripped while trying to retrieve an ingredient off of a high shelf and Sazed caught him.

[dunkleosteusprime]

I’ve always headcanonned that “TV” stands for the name of a group and that Taako and Sazed were just one act in a larger caravan. Like, maybe it’s “‘Travelling Vagabonds’ Entertainment Company,” or something like that.

I fucking adore the fact that “Taako from TV” is simply never addressed or explained in any way whatsoever and yet remains a consistent and story-relevant piece of the lore. Ren recognizes Taako! Of course she does! She knows him from TV. Does Ren have a TV? Do TVs exist in this world? We don’t know! They are literally never mentioned outside this one gag! Nothing about the state of their technology suggests they exist! But he’s Taako, from TV. Whether TVs exist for him to be on is irrelevant. They do for Taako.

[urfavoritewizard]

(ooc)

It’s been 10 years since TAZ: Balance came out and I’m still having such big feelings about Lucretia (I relistened to the entire season and it crushed me as always)

Anyways I need you all to imagine what Lucretia went through after the Stolen Century bc a lot of y’all still demonize her for what she did not realizing how young and scared she was bc y’all keep imagining her as a wisened 50-something

But she’s not actually in her 50s, that’s just how old her body ended up after her time in Wonderland

She and Magnus are around the same age, which means that before she spent that decade trying to find the Grand Relics by herself, she and Magnus were in their early/mid-20s

Imagine Lucretia falling in love with Magnus during the stolen century and not saying anything bc she spent so much of that period being shy and just taking notes on everything that happened around her and not really doing anything or actively spending time with anyone

Imagine Lucretia at 25 panicking about the Hunger and realizing that the only way to keep her friends safe was to make them forget about the Hunger and the relics they made, and make them forget about *her*

Imagine Lucretia at 25 meticulously choosing where to put her friends so that they’d live good lives, blissfully unaware of the oncoming apocalypse

Imagine Lucretia at 30 (now physically 50) learning that Taako’s career as a professional chef was cut short bc Sazed sabotaged him and poisoned and killed 40 people

Imagine Lucretia finding out that Merle was in a loveless marriage and walked out on his family, something he never would’ve done during the Stolen Century

Imagine Lucretia finding out that Magnus fell in love with someone *who wasn’t her* and got married and saved his town and then lost everything

Imagine Madame Director Lucretia looking him in the eyes, acting like she never knew him, crushed by the weight of the knowledge that he can never know who she is or how much she loves him, and that even if he remembered her, he would never love her the way he loved Julia

[forgottenfinn]

hii so i’m crazy so here’s will wood songs as taz characters cause i have basically only listened to will wood for the past two months and i can make anything whatever i want forever

also. i am a taako guy at my core so i can relate anything to him so sorry it’s taako all the way down

its like. a lot of taako and lucretia.

ww is just so taako coded idk what you want

this is so nothing

________________

tomcat disposables:

the twins -

the whole food imagery and the hope for peace and stability

“One night one flung light through this place

So I run for cover, over, under, left the rind out on the plate

Little heart racing and praying, "Something, keep me safe"

I think it saw my face

Okay, one hungry day”

being about the light of creation / the hunger during the stolen century

“i’ll make it through again, i have before, come on now, what’s one more?”

which is lup dying and being used to it after so many years dying

“Just like I'd always imagined it

More than I could eat

My dreams were finally reality

My struggles had a happy ending

They must want to be friends

My stomach starts to turn

With thirst, why does it hurt?

My just dessert is served, dig in”

taako realizing that lucretia was behind it all, the place where he found a home was lying to him. also idk something glamour springs

also lup dying just as she was about to successfully secure her relic

“I held on so tight

For so long, it's just not right

Let a sigh out as I close my eyes

Was that all there was to this?

What's for the best?”

lup dying after they Finally got to stay in a world, also her skeleton being described as just resting against the wall like it was relaxed

________________

becoming the lastnames:

i can and will make becoming the last names about whoever the fuck i want, however,

taako (& kravitz) -

“I'm not sure yet myself, but I learned from a good father

Yeah, I mean, sure, they messed me up, but I think that's just the gig”

being about davenport

“And marriage always scared me, but I'd like to have a last love

And love can last a pretty good long while, yeah, I've seen it around”

duh, barry and lup OBVIOUSLY

something something taako seeing lup fall in love after everything they went through together and that’s great but him never seeing that for himself

“But what do I know 'bout forever when so far I've been so fleeting?”

everyone was just talking dust, etc etc

“Babe, my frontal lobe's done growing, this might just be how I'm wired

But now we're kissing before brushing, smile with our whole faces

If you want a hyphen last name, I guess I don't mind the cadence”

it’s just. hold my hand. trust.

“Cause I've made more mistakes than simple empty moments

Whoa-oh, each one as out of character as you know I tend to be”

you’re gonna look me in the eyes and say that is not a taako thing. come on.

“If we grow old together, will you talk to my headstone?

That is, assuming that I die first (which is fair) and assuming I don't leave”

kravitz already being dead and taako having a habit of running away

________________

cicada days:

taako and lucretia -

“She said, "It just feels inhumane to lose this much"

"'Cause when you leave you know you takе more than your love"

lucretia losing her family, also her making taako forget lup

“Let all my red flags fade to white, yeah, I give up

Don't let me leave, I'll only take more than I gave

Okay, I'll pack my stuff

Here at the end of days, my god, what have I done?

Christ, now it feels damn inhumane to get all I've dreamed of”

lucretia after the day of story and song, feeling like none of them care about her anymore because of what she did. but ultimately, the world was safe, her family was safe, even tho the way she wanted to go about it was wrong and would have killed them all, and her having to come to terms with what she did to everyone, taako and davenport especially

taako after glamour springs, seeing the people he thought he killed after achieving his dream of being famous. something something sazed letting taako believe it was his fault

________________

euthanasia:

lucretia -

i actually think about this a lot LMAO

“I was right there

While you fought tooth and nail

Gasping in the gas mask thrashing till you disappeared

Say you're not scared, that you know it's cause I cared and

Say you know I love you, and that hope was just not there”

magnus walking in while she’s feeding the story to the void fish, her saying she loves all of them, and she’s gonna fix everything

“Over the rainbow, can I stop by and say hello and

Sorry I would take it back if I could but I know

To love one from too far to call

Is not to love at all, to whom is it I talk?”

her visiting them in their respective areas, just to make sure they were okay

________________

that’s enough, let get you home:

barry bluejeans -

“Haunt my bedroom at night and say "Let's get you home"

liches <3

“They say "Grow up, be a man, 'cause until then

You're nothing but a short-haired girl"

sorry trans barry will always be real to me

“So come on, William, grow up, be a man

'Cause until then they're gonna treat you

Like you're just a little girl

But come and Braille-palm-read, hold my hands and you'll see that

It's me who cries mercy while your fingers curl

And, oh, are you at all like me?

Do you know what I mean?

Or am I too close to see?

Someone, anyone?”

DO YOU GET IT.

________________

um, it’s kind of a lot:

taako -

“But I never been afraid of no one breaking my heart

It's not like I'm 'bout to fall and cut my throat on the shards”

taako not really. seeing falling in love as an option for him

“Hold me like a tourniquet, and I'll you, like an iron maiden

I've grown used to fear

But no, not to you yet, my dear”

something about kravitz being so just. sweet and endearing and that just scaring the shit out of taako. kravitz will hold him gently and help him, he’ll hold kravtiz like he will leave him

taako is always very much the quote of, everything i let go of has claw marks on it

“Oh, I love you so much it scares me half to death

I'm not used to this

How did it happen, baby?”

my taakitz :(

“And I'm afraid you'll notice all my flaws

I'm afraid you already have, obviously

And I'm afraid I'll come on too strong

Hold you too tight and scare you too”

post wonderland.

“I'll twist my words: a clever turn of phrase

Sorry, darling, please excuse my

Constant need to self-aggrandize

Coddling my narcissism

M.A.D. come ride my A-bomb

While I beg you to say I'm okay

So here's one last lyric to sum up these

Thoughts I struggled to come up with

To make me sound deep and smart and

Then I promise I'll shut up

Wait, let me think

Hold on, I got this

Anything but "I'm in love with you"

ARE WE KIDDING.

________________

half decade hangover:

taako and lucretia -

“Wonder how I didn't die

This is not my life. I'm no survivor, I only happened to survive”

taako post glamour springs after he got some reason didn’t test the food first

lucretia being alone after she erases their memories, technically alive but. why

“Cause I was drunk when I made my bed

Now with a half-decade hangover I lay down in it

What have I done? Don't know what I've said

It's a half-decade hangover, either this, in jail, or dead

It's a half-decade hangover, Jesus Christ my aching head”

taako having to deal with the aftermath of glamour springs. specifically “either this (adventuring with thb), in jail (cause of glamour springs), or dead (yeah.)”

also him with angus after being a dick to him or any other person he lashed out at

lucretia having to deal with what she had done, watching her family be a shell of themselves and then once they’re back, dealing with the backlash from it

“Sober, but so much still hangs over

Please believe me when I say I poured my whole past down the drain

Say that a second chance is a chance I can take

But I can't make amends for things I don't remember

I can only say I'm sorry and occasionally pray

Guess you'll just have to take my word that I've changed

After one thousand eight hundred twenty five days”

then not being able to remember half of the shit that they did, lucretia not being able to ask for forgiveness till so so much later. also she can’t fix what she did

________________

vampire reference in a minor key:

kravitz -

i mean, duh. the whole vibe of the song is so kravitz

“If you need me, I'll be in my coffin

You could come knocking, and I'll raise hell for you”

this man arguing with his literal GODDESS cause the guy he likes has a fucking weird family

“Hold my hands, we'll dance the 12-step on my grave

I'd kill the man I am for one more chance to be yours, babe

No, I ain't begging, I'm just saying, it's an option

Don't let the latest be the last nail in my coffin”

TRUSTTTT

________________

the main character:

taako -

i mean. come on. you saw that coming

“So, God forbid I'm seen just as an average human being

I mean, imagine if protagonists just died in the first scene

I'm the gap between a tragedy and comedy

Don't come at me

I'm the main character, and you have to like me”

i think justin listened to this song and went. yk what. i can work with that. (ik taz came out before incase i make it, hush)

“you’re about to kill americas favorite wizard.”

“I loot plot armor from NPCs

Well, they are to me

Trite, tropes, traits, traumas, trinkets, and treats, it's all XP”

taako stealing from Literally everyone all of the time

________________

against the kitchen floor:

taako -

it’s literally called against the Kitchen floor. what do you want from me.

“I don't owe you my heart

And I don't owe you my body

But you should know that I'm sorry

For being careless with you”

listen. me and mars love to play little barbie’s with these characters but like. do you understand. do you see the vision. taako being someone who has a lot of casual sex and is like no yeah i’m so cool and normal about this and he’s Not cause he’s a Liar but like.

the wanted to be wanted thing even if it’s not. good.

something soemthing sazed etc etc

“I swear, I'm really trying

Get it together, Will, know and do better

It just don't come natural to me to think that you'd want me for mе

I swear, I'm really trying

Oh, I'm sorry, I promise, I'm doing my best

I just haven't learned how to be human as you are yet”

him having to learn what a normal and healthy relationship looks like with kravitz and being kind of off put when kravitz actually likes him for real

“I've lived more lives than enough, I haven't died quite as much

But I'm not a real person, just the shit you can't make up, and”

stolen century, duh

“I swear, I'm really trying

I'm just as exposed if I take off my clothes

When we make the closest thing to love that I'm capable of

And I don't know why you would care

But I'm really trying”

something about his glamour thing after wonderland

“I'm catatonic in your arms

Crying, "How did I cause so much harm?"

I'm down pounding my head against the kitchen floor

Apologizing for my life and ever entering yours

Don't say "I'm sorry, but this can't go on"

I know you've got scars of your own

But hide my knives before you go

I'll either live or die alone”

him with sazed after glamour springs

“ promise, I honestly wanna prove improvement's possible

I swear, I'm so fucking sorry

I'm not a good person, I'm barely a person at all

But someday I'll be perfect, and I'll make up for it all”

“taakos not a hero.” yeah.

________________

sex, drugs, rock’n’roll:

taako -

“So this is what I choose to do

With my redeeming quality

That thing that came from the same place as my

Instability”

i know it means mental instability, and like yeah that too, but his home/money instability. learning how to be a wizard and how to cook so that he would have somewhere to stay

“It's not a gift if you pay for it

And I don't want no charity

I spent all my years to end up right here, and now

I really think I'd rather leave”

post glamour springs

“And I hate proving that

I'm still human after all”

“i’m a fully realized creation! fuck!” etc etc

________________

white noise:

lucretia -

“But If you listen closely I swear, to God I swear

You can hear the ocean if you hold it up to your ear, here:

White noise

If you listen close between the waves

White noise

You can hear the ocean through your wake

White noise

If you listen close between the waves

White noise

You can hear the ocean through your wake”

just this whole songs meaning is very lucretia to me. the quiet isn’t boring. there’s more to lucretia than even she sees if you care to notice

[anistarrose]

you know the drill, spin this wheel of TAZ Balance characters and make your choice:

no rerolls, but you can substitute fucking for cuddling or marry for tax benefits if that's what makes it fair/competitive for you and what you vibe with. look up characters here on the wiki if you don't remember them. personally I got Sazed when I tested it and I'm fuming