#talking to myself basically :3
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yayll · 3 months ago
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~ a little something about Dazai's impeccable detective skills... only when it comes to you ~
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"Uh-huh... And you said you were meeting someone last night?" Dazai pretends to jot down this information, his brows slightly furrowed as he scribbles into the notepad he conjured up from his long tan coat just a few seconds ago.
"Yes, that's correct."
"Ah, I see.. Fascinating. And how was it?"
"How was what?"
"Your date." He says, smugly. His head tilts in mock innocence, and his smile stays plastered on his lips while he watches you practically choke on your own spit. Now he's really going to start writing details down...
"Oh, no, it wasn't like that. Nothing that official, heh." You fidget with your fingers, looking down, and suddenly your shoelaces are the most interesting thing you've ever seen. You didn't think questioning would last this long, you weren't even involved in the crime, but this eccentric detective before you says all witnesses are vital for the investigation and you're just doing your civil duty as a valued member of society!
And this drives Dazai insane... how ridiculous that you don't have a clear standing within the life of whomever you were seeing. It should be a crime, really! If you were his, no one would ever hear the end of it. He hums to himself, nodding as if in deep thought as he draws a heart around your name in his notepad, adding his own name right under yours. He clears his throat and looks back up at you, making sure his knees don't give out at the way you seem so bashful around him.
"I beg your pardon? Do I hear that a young and beautiful person has not been swept off their feet successfully?"
Just before you can answer, a young man with white hair and a peculiar asymmetrical haircut runs to Dazai's side. He peers at his notes, and nervously chimes in.
"Er, Dazai? Mister Kunikida wanted me to come find you, but I didn't think you'd actually be working- Why are there so many hearts drawn-"
Dazai immediately moves his hand over the young man's face and comically shoves it away from his notepad, still smiling at at you. He speaks through gritted teeth and a nervous chuckle.
"Not now, Atsushiiiii, I'm working~"
This causes Atsushi to grumble, his face deflating into an annoyed sigh as his gloved hand scratches the top of his head.
"But Dazai, this is kind of important, and I really don't want to have to be the one to tell Kunikida that you're slacking off again..."
Dazai instantly snaps his head to look at Atsushi, pointing at you with dramatic flair, his voice reaching a mocking pitch.
"Oh, but I'm not, young Atsushi! I've come out here on pure basic instinct... I'm conducting a very serious investigation, and so unfortunately Kunikida and the rest of the folks at the agency will just have to wait for my genius intellect to come up with a tantalizing resolve. Get Ranpo to help. 'Kay byeee!~"
Dazai grabs you by the arm and though the gesture is hasty, he's surprisingly very gentle as he drags you away from the white haired young man. You're now standing outside a cafe and Dazai takes out what looks like a business card, presenting it to you. He scans your slightly confused face, and thinks about what other precious faces you'd make for him if he stuck around you long enough like the hound dog he is. He wonders if you'd let him touch your arm again, maybe even your hand... maybe even your-
"Are you okay, Dazai?" You ask in slight concern. Oops! He's been nonverbal for too long. He shakes his head rapidly and lets out a soft chuckle.
"Never been better! Here, take this, it's my personal contact. I think I've got all the notes I need to finish my work, but I seem to be missing one last thing-"
He proceeds to lean in a little, his now softened hazelnut eyes looking into yours intently, and his voice becoming drastically more serious. There's a glint of sincerity, and an emotion you can't quite place, but it makes your blood pressure spike and your cheeks flush at the casual intimacy of it all.
"... A time and date so I can see you again, perhaps?"
You feel yourself feeling giddy, and slightly stammer as your response flows out of you coyly.
"Ooh well, maybe tomorrow in the evening? I'll be off of work then. We can um, get coffee here?" You nod your chin up at the cafe sign, and flash him a soft smile. A smile that will keep him happily satiated until tomorrow.
"Ah, then it's a date! An official one..." He winks at you, and pats the top of your head, the feeling is light and angelic. By the time you recover, he's gone. You get a last glimpse of the way the tail of his coat swishes as he sharply turns the corner of the street, and you stand there smiling like a giddy schoolgirl. What you don't know is he does the very same thing, thinking about how playing with the fire of his own destiny is worth ruining if he could cement himself into your heart. In his adoring eyes, you could do no wrong. That's his job.
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moonkhao · 3 months ago
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hi.
#i know most of you didn’t even realize i was gone#but man…#my mental health was like in a state of 📉📉📉 in the past 30 days like we love being mentally ill and fucking insane <3#it was mostly bc i panicked and started obsessing over possible water damage in my flat kind of out of nowhere#like it started when my landlord came to check my bathroom bc my downstairs neighbours had water stains on their ceiling back in july#which had been caused by their shower curtain apparently but i was already spiraling when my landlord told me so i was sure it was my fault#i was assuming it was bc of me bc i had sometimes been spilling some of my bathwater and i was like WHAT IF IT HAS GONE THROUGH THE FLOOR?#and it didn't help that it has been hot af and very humid in my apartment LIKE WELL OVER 25 DEGREES AND 60% HUMIDITY#anyways i couldn’t shake this not matter what i tried and my fucking insane brain made me think i was going to get arrested for like#flooding the whole building or for causing some sort of mold infestation#i had SO MANY panic attacks; i wasn't able to sleep; i wasn't able to eat; i was on edge and panicky basically 24/7 so fun fun fun :D#and i kept waking up in the middle of the night and HAD to go check my walls or the space below my kitchen#it was compulsory like i couldn't not get up and go check and tbh i would've thrown out all of my furniture if i could've to check for mold#(and shhhh i know how fucking insane this sounds but having a mentally ill brain that's anxious all the time does suck ass sometimes 🥲)#(the worst thing about it tho was that i was SO AWARE of how insane about this i was being and yet i couldn't stop losing my mind over it)#(also i was so ready to move tf outta here bc i couldn't handle being triggered 24/7 which is why my mom let me stay with her last week )#i was so out of it that i couldn't even let myself do the things i usually enjoy... like at all#like watching my shows or spending any ungodly amount of time on tumblr... or replying to messages i got from people who i love#ig this goes to show HOW bad this actually was for me mentally bc usually tumblr and my shows are like my safe place#anyways we finally had a leak detection dude come over today and we had him check the water levels in my walls#and he said everything is fine and he specifically told me i should stop worrying about any water damage BC THERE IS NO WATER DAMAGE#he also said that the weather has just been insanely humid this year so it's not surprising that the humidity levels are higher than usual#i’m still a bit scared about some possible mold but ig this is good enough for now#i am aware how ridiculous this must sound for anyone who's reading this now but couldn't let it go not even with meds so let me live pls :(#TLDR I WAS GOING THROUGH IT BUT I AM BACK I THINK AND I AM MOST LIKELY GOING TO START BOTHERING YOU WITH MY GIFS AGAIN <3#AND I JUST REALIZED I HAVEN'T EVEN SEEN ANY OF THE HEART KILLERS STUFF YET ASIDE FROM ONE OR TWO PICS LIKE :(#OH AND I NEED TO START WATCHING SUMMER NIGHT ;_;#sabrina talks#@AIRENYAH GIRL I AM SO SORRY I WILL PROBABLY REPLY TO YOUR MESSAGES LATER TODAY OR TOMORROW MORNING ;_;<3
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sparklingchim · 5 months ago
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#can i yap for a moment#im extremely sleepy but im feeling very upset and mad and confused#also lowkey questioning whether me feeling all that is justified or if i am overreacting#anyway#made out w a boy tonight#and he wanted to go to his place#and i was like no i wanna stay and dance with my girlies#and he gets upset??#asking why i'd kiss him if i don't wanna hook up and i said i just wanna have fun?#made me feel so stupid#that anger in me led to a little fight with another boy (who was unfortunately very cute) and i just wanted to punch him#i just hate when boys think they're so superior#so i argued with this stupid but hot man#until an ex? friend shows up and he was pretty drunk just yapping about things#anyway he basically told me he'd like to rekindle our friendship#but not in a heyy haven't talked in so long let's meet up again#it was in a heyy let's hang out again got a new big car and moved out of my parent's house 😋#which gave me the ick bc that's why we aren't friends anymore and i told him no multiple times#and got sad bc he was one of my closest friends#anyway and then we left the party#this guy pulls me aside the parking lot#and i was so embarrassed bc there were so many people and they were all looking and i could already see people gossiping about it#and i just wanted to die#and then he just CONFESSES??#gives me flowers and all which is saur saur cute#but i legit have zero feelings for him </3#and have commitment issues and have never been in a relationship and don't wanna be in one#actually grosses me out thinking about relationships </3#the confession was so random and i kinda lost another friendship? even tho i wouldn't rlly consider him a friend we just share sum classes#but yeah boys are so stupid and confusing and i dunno how and why i get myself into these situations :') m sorry just needed to rant </3
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kuroi-kotoba · 1 year ago
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SUGARDUO HUGGED ONCE AND THEN SUGARDUO HUGGED TWICE AND AND AND AND-
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skibasyndrome · 2 months ago
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#not to be a broken lil man on main#but I was on the phone with my dad for 30 minutes just now (that's a lot for a phone call with him) and like.... damn. yeah. i do have one#parent who's not horrible huh#we talked a lot about my plans for the future...... which I only now told him bcs scary and bcs........ I never ever during my 25 years of#being alive got the impression from my parents that something like this would be an acceptable career choice or something they'd support#and I mean. my [redacted] of a mother is the best example for how. not alright it is with her that I'm doing something that's not very...#traditional for this family#but anyways. my dad was absolutely fucking lovely#to the point that I get getting teary eyed and felt my throat closing up cause. huh. i guess in his own way he does love me and believe in#he asked me to send him a link or a pdf of my first conference report because he wants to keep it somewhere 😭😭😭😭😭😭#I'm....... ouch. ouch ouch ouch ouch ouch#you know the ghosting I am really good at with tumblr chats (sorry guys. ilu. I just suck at communication)???? i'm also extremely good at#that with whatsapp chats and just. not calling my irl loved ones#so idk. hearing him say he understands and just wanted to make sure I wasn't upset with him and like. wanted to know if I was doing okay.#damn. okay. damn#idk#this was such a good talk and he was so suppertive and non-judgemental and I actually told him about my birthday and how my mother's call#upset me and he was like. yeah. same. and like... he's basically gone no contact with her as well as it turns out#idk. I really should give him more credit and like... I feel like there's so much shifting and change and development happening while I'm n#not there and sometimes it's hard to remember that he actually /could/ understand some things. just cause I've always been so used to not#sharing anything about myself because it wasn't safe when I was younger and... idk........ lots of emotions going on rn#so glad we talked though. so glad#simon.out.#if you read all this.... idk man.... sorry for oversharing but thanks for caring ig <3
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puhpandas · 6 months ago
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hi mutuals im just curious.
#im a ggy lover myself and would obviously love to see it realized in a game#but i also like gregory as a character more than his semi-canon backstory#and have complicated feelings on if i want them to confirm ggy at all.#i love ggy but dont want it to take screentime away from gregory#who alongside vanessa havent been focused on in years#(ruin was mimic basically the whole time#doesnt count) and need the screentime desperately.#personally#after THIS long (2 and a half years since gregory screentime and over a year since GGYs release)#i cant help but always wonder if theyve just. waited too long and they shouldnt confirm it.#at least just that they shouldnt release something just for the sake of confirming it and just leave it as book knowledge.#if they did focus on ggy in a game i'd want it to serve the plot involving multiple characters and progress slowly#i dont want it to be confirmed then its just background knowledge i would want there to be a plotline of#gregory remembering it throughout the plot of a game and dealing with it.#it'd confirm it then but it'd also still be wholly focused on Gregory alone and also be a natural reveal for people who dont read the books#for me its option 3 i guess. by all means its for sure canon at the moment im just talking about how it would be revealed in a game#or if at all and left as knowledge someone who read the books would know#my idea is wishful thinking we'd never get something that intricate#i can hope though#i could be so cool#but damn theyre just handling the story so strangely rn#pandas.txt#pandas talks#poll#thoughts#pre hw2 dlc#jic
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gladiatorcunt · 5 months ago
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han solo wants what atton rand has
#AND THATS A FACT#guys pls play kotor 2 and see my vision#atton deserves a romance questline with as much depth and length as astarion’s fr#and also an option to be an evil power couple#i will fund the kotor remakes and kotor 3 myself if i have to#its the way i didn’t even know he existed when i started playing#but then i fell in love#like he’s an extremely close second to anakin#‘they can’t hurt you bc you’ll be right here with me playing pazaak’ AND THEN THAT BEING BASICALLY THE LAST THING HE SAYS#obsidian partner with larian studios and bring kotor back and my life is yours#i deadass wrote fic about my mc and atton after playing#star wars#knights of the old republic#i havent played the restored content mod but even then its like……. i need something more#a fictional star wars situationship really had me crying bc i wanted a better ending#kotor 2 is so interesting bc i loved it#but whats great about it sometimes reinforces whats bad about it#that being the cut content and the sometimes apparent lack of substance in spots#i shouldn’t have been an infant when kotor 2 was made i shouldve been in the writers room#i need him i need him i need him#‘you have a husband?’ oooooooooooooooooooh#i just think seeing the kotor games with the graphics of something like jedi survivor would be insane#fav#i could talk about this game forever i beat both of them in the span of like about 2 weeks i was obsessed#my nerd ass loves star wars sm#like lets keep going back in time i rlly dont care about the ‘modern’ star wars era#and theres an easter egg line where atton calls you an angel even though he says hes joking#ahhhhhhhhhhhhh#genuinely down bad#📜.scrolls
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stuckinapril · 9 months ago
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i think i officially set my sights on a therapist and i'll be contacting her very soon?? therapy was legitimately not on my 2024 bingo card (or in the cards for me at all) but here we are????
#this blog always had a focus on social science and detangling feelings and experiences. like it's basically been serving as my diary#bc this blog has always been my main outlet for it. i hate talking feelings to anyone irl. it's a bad habit but i hate it#so it was a game changer and helped me grow up sooo much. esp supplemented w other people's experiences.#being raised by a stoic engineer mother who's very much warm but also not very good at feelings at times has caused me to suppress SO much#compounded w being the eldest daughter. like that is a damning sentence in and of itself#tumblr just gave me an outlet for stuff like this. and every social media is essentially a highlight reel of ppl's best moments.#tumblr is the opposite. i've always loved that too whether it was in the form of humor or more earnest posts#could i work through my own issues by myself? yes probably#and my blog will always have that facet even if i get a therapist#but a therapist's input. just a professional's input. will expedite a lot of improvement for me i think#this has been a critical time period for me anyway bc i'm budgeting my whole schedule for once vs being handheld by uni deadlines#and it's just gonna keep getting more and more intense from here bc i'm truly pushing my comfort zone more than ever before#it just feels like the right call even tho i'm lowkey nervous ab it bc i HATE talking feelings in person.#this therapist will not fall for my trying to deflect by asking her about her life. which. usually works on my friends <3#we will see. a therapy arc is coming very soon basically#p
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awfullybigwardrobe44 · 2 months ago
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Constantly in this weird mood where I’m just waiting for God to give me a sign that I’m forgiven because I can’t tell if it’s just my OCD or if I actually have gone over the deep end somehow. I’m not doing compulsions to try to figure it out, so that’s Good, but it just puts me at God’s mercy for whether or not I feel like I can come to Him and believe I’m saved
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That scene towards the end of the S3 trailer
The one where Shadow is running to save Sonic from disappearing
What if by that scene, the main conflict is changed? Nine is no longer actively trying to get ahold of Sonic, to drain the paradox prism energy from him. Just like Shadow and his focus on saving Green Hill over the Shatterverse before, he concedes that *nothing* will exist if they can't fix the paradox prism (assuming that the crew comes to the conclusion that they need to fix the paradox prism to have a chance at fixing the rapid breakdown of the shatterverse).
What if after episodes of fighting Nine and avoiding having his prism energy taken from him, Sonic gives himself over willingly. Nine has just realized how far he took things, how tunnel visioned he became on a goal with the sacrifice of things (and a person) he cared about. What if he feels guilty, resolved to help fix the universe they live in before anything else, and Sonic *asks* him to drain the energy this time?
And no matter what Shadow or Nine or anyone else says, no matter how uncertain doing so would make Sonic's fate uncertain and put it at stake, they can't refute the argument. Doing this could kill him (just like back on Ghost Hill, when Sonic asked for Nine to give him energy to match that of the prismatic titan), but is there any other way to save the shatterverse?
I'm not sure what the answer is myself, but perhaps they hope so. They're running out of time, and if they can't fix it, all of them will die. So, they all form a plan.
What if Nine feels this guilt as he drains the prism energy from Sonic? What if he feels more awful (and a little jealous) when it's up to Shadow to ultimately save him (because Shadow's the only other one who can move quite as fast)?
What if Shadow runs and runs, desperate too to make sure that Sonic won't die? What if he's frustrated at Nine and Sonic (because why did it have to come to this?), but also frustrated at himself (because maybe if he could have been there with Sonic, or maybe if he was the one searching the shatterspaces before, maybe he could have stopped all this before it went too far, maybe he could have kept Sonic safe from this fate)?
What if Shadow enters that shatterspace with Sonic in his arms, hoping so badly he'll pull through, trying not to think about what'll happen if he doesn't?
And what if Nine is the next to enter the shatterspace, arriving before anyone else? What if Nine watches Shadow hold Sonic's barely existing form and feels a pang of jealousy, and a waterfall of guilt. What will he do if Sonic doesn't pull through?
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zana-art · 2 years ago
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a scene from The Courage of Stars by @hella1975
idk why its so dark but u may need to turn brightness up to see it
[ID: a semi-realistic digital portrait of yue and suki from atla. they’re facing each other, faces close, looking each other in the eyes. suki is wearing her kyoshi warrior outfit and yue a parka. behind them, the stars and the full moon shine through a circular window. /end ID] (ID by @maileesque <3)
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lloydfrontera · 5 months ago
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yohankang · 6 days ago
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i really thought i would come back here by december but there's no chance ☹️
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walleeli · 1 year ago
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Enrichment time in my enclosure……
From this:
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At the end of Trimax volume 6 (via trigun ultimate overhaul)
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james-spooky · 1 month ago
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this is a test
#i’m bored i just wanna see how many words i can put in the tags like will it just keep going on forever or will they stop me like i know th#the tag limit is 30 ok so the iindividual tag limit is 140 characters that’s actually so rude i wanted to keep going forever and see how lo#g this could be but i guess we can do this 30 times ok what the flip should i talk about hm i was playing the guitar today but i rage quit#ause the song was hard and hurting my fingers! ermmmmm it was sunny ok this is boring let’s think of more exciting things to type hmmm acco#ding to all known laws of aviation- jk i’m not doing the bee movie script but can you imagine i think that would be funny hmmmmm words i lo#e podcasts so bad that’s a fact no one has ever know before my blog definitely isn’t all about audio dramas the people are definitely not a#ready aware of this jesus christ this is only the seventh one of these this is actually quite a lot of space i underestimated how much i ha#e to type btw there’s probably spelling mistakes in here somewhere or autocorrect has been annoying but i cba to retype anything so i don’t#care lolllllllllllll how do you feel about oscar malevolent i feel a normal amount actually (lie) yk what i really miss sam and colin alrea#y like i’m actually not okay i really hope we hear from sam again in s2 and also colin ngl i hope ur in the computers soz or not dead miss#im like a bastard my paranoid it king ok erm im running out of things to say um heartstopper s3 was crazy good i cried lmao i love gay peop#e so much it’s crazy i hope it gets renewed for s4 i need to reread the comics lowkey and the books they’re all so talented for being so yo#ng it scares me ngl !!!!!! the tmagp hiatus is getting to me slightly like february in reality is soon and not that far away for how podcas#ts go but seriously how am i supposed to live until then without knowing what happened. please colin be alive. ive only just realised i can#use fills stops. sorry that’s made everything a bit messy. i should’ve been doing this before. whoops. anyways. hi mutuals i love you all s#much i hope you enjoy my rambles and shitposts cause i enjoy yours very much! never think you’re being annoying i literally don’t care be a#annoying as you want posts as much as you want i am ur biggest fan <3 im getting a bit fatigued from typing like my mind is blank basically#now it’s just turned into a. stream of consciousness but i don’t really have any thoughts to put here idk if we’re halfway ermmmm omg it’s#lmost halloween how crazy is that time is flying by i kinda forgot it was october lmao. it’s wild how it’s basically almost christmas. like#what. that’s illegal. how is it wintertime again. what the flip. i miss summer already take me backkkkkkk. i hope my phone doesn’t crash or#smth cause i’ve not saved this as a draft and i cba to do any of this again. maybe i should save it. ok i will when i reach the next tag bc#ok it stopped me but i’ve saved it and holy jesus it’s a lot of text im just sat here giggling there’s really no point to any of this other#than me being bored sooooooooooooooooo (imagine if i just did the letter o for every character wouldn’t that be crazy) so wait there’s 140#haracters and 30 tags so what’s 30 x 140. someone hurry. i haven’t done maths lessons in two and a half years i’ve forgotten everything wai#let me get the calculator app ok im back it said 4100 characters so. i dont know how many words that roughly is but its. a decent amount. o#what the flip why am i wasting tag space with maths. i hate maths. my screen time has been actually soooooooooo bad recently like damn some#one put my phone in a block of ice please joshua gillespie style. my mind is running out of things to say. do i talk about myself. im james#im 18 which is weird cause wdym im an adult go away. ive run out of facts. i love podcasts and procedural dramas that stupid firefighter sh#w is my life unfortunately. i think chappell roan should be the queen of england instead of king charles. i dont like having a king cause#ho needs men in power not me. ok um this is the last tag equal rights for all. yolo. the time will pass anyways! thank u boredom ok bye gn:
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delta-piscium · 2 years ago
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#24 for the dialogue prompt lol ❤️
24.  “Are you thinking what I’m thinking?” “Probably not.”
“Why are there never any hot guys here anymore?” Eddie complained, voice whinier than he’d like to admit. 
Jeff raised an eyebrow at him, “you calling me ugly, Munson?”
Eddie rolled his eyes before giving Jeff his sweetest smile. “Never any hot guys who’d also like to have sex with me, or are you suddenly interested Jeffy-boy?” 
Jeff made a disgusted face that would have been insulting if Eddie didn’t feel exactly the same. The only other gay guy he knew and they were tragically not attracted to each other. What a cruel world they lived in. 
Eddie was about to complain about that instead but before he could Jeff did a double take at the bar, eyes widening. 
“Is that Steve Harrington?” 
Eddie whipped his head around so quickly it was a wonder he didn’t hurt himself. It would have been worth it if he did though because there sitting at the bar was indeed Steve.
Steve with his broad shoulders, and ridiculous hair that Eddie had been obsessed with since his first senior year. 
“Oh shit,” he rasped, his throat suddenly dry. 
He blinked several times to see if maybe he was imagining it and Steve would go away. He didn’t, he stayed right where he was. And then he was turning around and their eyes locked. Steve looked shocked for a second but quickly gathered himself, tilting his head slightly at Eddie giving a slow once-over. Just that made Eddie feel like he was gonna explode and then the bastard had the audacity to wink at him before turning back around. 
Eddie gaped. 
“Did he just wink at you?” Jeff asked slowly, “did Steve fucking Harrington just wink at you in this gay bar?”
Eddie wordlessly nodded, Steve had just done that. If Eddie had had any questions about what Steve was doing here he didn’t anymore.
Steve Harrington had just- he had- oh this was good. Eddie's lips stretched into a slow smirk as his shock slowly faded away, a new thought taking its place. 
“I don’t like that look,” Jeff eyed him suspiciously. 
Eddie ignored it, instead asking, “are you thinking what I’m thinking?”
He sighed, “probably not.” 
“I should seduce Steve.” Eddie continued before Jeff had even finished. 
“Not even close to what I was thinking.” 
Eddie pressed his half-drunk beer into Jeff’s empty hands. “Well start thinking it baby, 'cause it’s happening.” 
He spun around as Jeff muttered ‘here we fucking go’ which Eddie chose to interpret as him being supportive. Like ‘fuck yeah, here we fucking go!’ he gave Jeff a one-fingered wave over his shoulder as thanks. 
'Here we fucking go indeed', he thought as he slid up next to Steve.
dialogue prompt
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