#talking to friends is incredibly hard | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

astersugar · 2 years

Text

self care can look like taking time for yourself and being alone, yes. but consider: the same way washing dishes or taking showers is self care, talking to your friends and hanging out with them is also self care

#does this make sense to anyone else?#it may just be an anxiety thing but like #talking to friends is incredibly hard #and putting yourself out there is scary #but it's always worth it #blythe speaks

6 notes · View notes

smokin-salmon · 4 months

Text

Fuck it. *Makes the old woman cry*

2K notes · View notes

poorly-drawn-mdzs · 5 months

Text

Do you like sci-fi and indie animation? Check out Monkey Wrench!

#monkey wrench #digital art #This series is very delightful and also in need of more attention!#Usually I would ramble about why love it - however I am going to go a little off the rails and talk about something else.#Namely that this is a gift for a very dear friend who loves this series a lot! One of my favourite people of all time!#Thank you for so many things. For keeping me going when times are dark. For sticking by in the hard times.#Thank you for the incredible soup and the fun moments! For the great recommendations on series.#I sometimes feel like I should thank the universe for letting our paths cross when they did.#It feels cheesy to say all this but I really am such a better person because of you.#Thank you for reading all my silly comics even though you have *no* idea what is going on in them. It means a lot.#My gift of a silly doodle and hopefully getting a few people to check out this show is not adequate to express my gratitude.#But hey - we've got the rest of our lives to keep saying thank you.#Love you lots mate. Can't say it enough B'*)

901 notes · View notes

angelmush · 2 months

Text

the other day i walked around the golden lake w my love and the sun was setting hot and orange and we watched a brown duck preening through the weeds, ducking her head under the dark water. the cool lake swallowed up my tired feet to the ankles and we counted the dog walkers with their curly panting doodles and their handsome german shepherds and their whip smart little terriers and we admired the careful construction of a sand castle whose moat held determinedly against the lapping of the waves. we could feel in our chests the persistent thunderous thumping of celebratory music at the finish line of the lakeside 5k, welcoming each gasping runner across its bounds. and i felt like crying. i felt like curling into myself and crying. we walked through the swamp of the bird sanctuary afterwards and listened to the woods sing and croak and groan and then we went and got ube and yuzu gelato and devoured it suntired and sweating on the couch in our living room. and i was so overcome w a deep and true unshakeable happiness and a sort of confused grief that i wanted to sob and sob and sob.

#i am so happy for the first time in my entire life #a consistent and true joyfulness #i am in love w my life #i want to stick around to see it #and i mean that w my entire being for the first time in my whole life #and to say that means confronting the first 24 years of my life where that wasn’t true #where i was miserable and heartbroken and unkind and dishonest and cruel #and i didn’t want to be alive #even when i was doing well i still didn’t want to be alive #for 24 years.#i had no fucking idea being alive could be so easy. i had no idea.#i want to hold myself and tell them i want to wrap myself up and say it will be BETTER #it will be so so far from perfect but it will be so so good you just have to hold on #i am so happy but i am mourning #i don’t know how to articulate it at all i just feel #happy but grieving #i LOVE this new city we live in i LOVE it here #i like my job enough to stand it for enough hours a week to get by #i have the time and the energy to throw myself into hobbies like knitting and cooking #i watch one or two good movies a week #i eat delicious food i’ve made and from restaurants we want to try #i’m IN LOVE. with my girlfriend in a way that’s so overwhelming and unlike anything i’ve ever felt that words don’t do it justice #i have friends who are gentle and patient with me when it’s hard for me to reach out #i am fighting agoraphobia tooth and fucking nail and i’m seeing the world and experiencing it #i laugh every day!!!! every single day!!!!#i have a goofy wonderful dog and an incredibly sweet cat #i talk to my baby brother all the time and he tells me he loves me and he’s graduating college soon and i’m so fucking proud #i wish i would’ve known how good it would all become #i wish i could’ve known #personal

35 notes · View notes

aesthetic-uni · 6 months

Text

Oh hell yeah

#uni talks about the universe #boop #april 1st #y’all are about to get booped so hard #I was going to say mutuals but I don’t have any #I don’t need friends they disappoint me #(I am so incredibly lonely)#so now it’s a free for all #get booped bitches

71 notes · View notes

novelconcepts · 5 months

Text

Doing a bit of a Santa Clarita Diet rewatch, and while I don't know intentional any of Abby's queer-coding was (and how much was just Hewson's vibes), her relationship with Eric has such teenage comphet energy. Like whenever Abby's like "I really care about you, more than anyone, but it's hard for me to pretend I'm into the physical; this has maybe a 2% chance of working out," my lesbian ass is just nodding so hard. Like, yeah! Exactly! You don't know you're gay yet, or you sense it in yourself and try to veer away, so what's the easiest option? You find the soft nerd boy, your best friend in the world, someone you absolutely trust to have your back no matter what, and go, "Yeah, uh huh, sure. I'll try that one." You absolutely look for the most non-threatening dude in the vicinity. And then it's improved by Eric's whole thing being like "yeah, this is absolutely someone I am down bad for, but if she doesn't wind up digging me that way, she's still my best friend." It reads so true. No idea if they were ever going to actually walk down that road, but in my heart of hearts? Here for it.

#santa clarita diet #i do not have a meta tag for this show and...i do not think i need one #but i get this a little more every time i revisit the show #some of it is almost definitely hewson's powerful queer energy but like. looking at the awkwardness of the sven thing lends to it too #you're trying really hard not to see yourself as a lesbian so what's the OTHER natural option to cling to?#the popular pretty boy #and it's just so awkward and uncomfortable #and then you get the winter friendship where there's so much chemistry and that just dumbass teen recklessness #that is innate to abby as a character but also SO present in first relationships for queer kids who are just incredibly excited to be In It #and then all the lil rainbows and shit in the costuming #yeah i'll die on this hill. lesbian vibes all the way for abby hammond i love this character so much #fun fact: my soft easy-cling friend of choice also happened to be gay #and while we literally never talked about it until we were adults i know we both clocked each other in like middle school #so shoutout to my buddy alex for being a safe 'yeah sure that can be a crush i never have to do anything about' person #a true legend of a man

20 notes · View notes

readyfreddy · 8 days

Text

The team I work for announced their promotional schedule for the upcoming season, looking forward to it for the most part, and hopefully they'll be better than last season (they were worst in their conference and second last in the league, it has to get better, right?).

In the winter of 2023, I came forward and explained that I think that hosting a 'pride night' next season would be great. I did hours of research, data analysis, only to have my presentation shut down due to "discussion among ownership." With this, I basically came out to my manager and to most of the front office staff, I am lucky to be surrounded by a bunch of great people at all levels of the organization.

At the beginning of last season, I found out that they basically did their own 'pride/hockey is for everyone' night, and it fucking stung. Make no mistake, I'm thrilled that they're trying to make the rink/sport a more inclusive space. It stings because they know how much time I put into this, as well as the risk of coming out in a place where people like me aren't common or even welcomed (as of writing this, there's no POC on the roster, three POC (myself included) working in various positions at the team, and two queer people (business side, myself included).

Since their hockey is for everyone night is earlier in the season than last year's, I suspect that things have already been set in place and by the time I'm officially back, it's going to be too late to have any meaningful contribution.

Last season's hockey is for everyone night went pretty good, with most players using pride tape and saying supportive messages for the team's social media and in game video. I am so happy that they were able to do this, and I am hoping that this season's night goes equally as well. I am hoping that I am able to help in a future season's pride/hockey is for everyone night (provided I continue working there).

I wish I could truthfully say that hockey is for everyone, but there are so many barriers and cultural factors that would need to change to make that true.

#my friend said something along the lines of 'they don't want gay people in hockey' and it feels so true.#I know that I don't come from a hockey background. I have experience in inclusivity forums with EC. I started my school's GSA.#I've faced racial discrimination. I've had people say incredibly homophobic things to me at meets and shows.#I alone cannot make the change. But with people who care it is possible #I'm tired. I feel like them hiring me ticked off most of their diversity boxes. Not just here but at previous jobs as well.#for the most part I love working there bc I get paid to watch hockey #It's not hard to figure out that I'm gay within 10 minutes of talking to me. Saying it to people who are in higher positions is scary #change hockey culture

7 notes · View notes

lesbiradshaw · 1 year

Text

just started thinking about bradley as a teenager struggling with his emotions both pre and post his mother’s death/fall out with maverick but not wanting to reach out for help because a history of mental health problems can get you disqualified from enlisting in the service. happy saturday guys.

#that boy should have been in therapy from ages 2 on up like.#i def hc that carole took him to someone when he was younger but bradley probably stopped going once he was older and was given the choice #but like. idk. picturing carole trying to bring up him going back after she gets sick because she KNOWS he needs to talk to someone #and maverick cant be there all the time. but bradley says no because hes a teenager and hes started thinking about how to make himself +#appealing to the navy and that opens a whole other can of worms where carole sees that but doesnt want to deny him #because she can see hes already having a hard time with things as they are.#mav trying to convince him to go and bradley pointing out it’s hypocritical because maverick doesnt like talking about his feelings either #i just think people ignore his trauma So Much. they only pay attention to the maverick and goose bits #but they fail to consider how even before the maverick stuff happened bradley had a lot to deal with from a very young age #he spent most of his life on his own! he lost the people he loved most OVER and OVER…#the amount of trauma that must have come flooding back when phoenix (&bob but phoenix is clearly bradleys closest friend) had to eject #i think thats why people painting him as angry & agressive because of the scene where he yells at mav never sits right w me #that moment is so incredibly raw for both of them. bradley lashing out when hes just been triggered is not that surprising????#anyways.#carolcore #bradley rooster bradshaw

36 notes · View notes

lovesodeepandwideandwell · 2 months

Text

Extremely funny scenes of Austenian irony at Jane Austen reading group

#the scene: three single women of varying ages. one single man. single man talks about how every woman he knows is too career-focused to date #single women (after a respectable interlude of dating app talk) discuss how there are absolutely no guys to date #and the standards are on the ground #and then express varying positions from wouldn't-change-career-for-anyone to must-have-career-while-not-married #to no commitment to career at all #single woman (me) talks about the perils of dating in a transient world where you have no other community #single man talks about how ready he is to change career and location for a wife but how hard it is to express that non-creepily #and how women don't trust it or won't receive it #assorted married persons in the room chime in at various points here #at one point single women is saying there's no men and single man raises his hand #single people all leave alone.#(and this is a seemingly lovely guy who i've wondered myself and been nudged by a friend about dating!#hysterical to me. cannot get over it. or could not if i hadn't hit my emotional capacity for the week sometime yesterday evening #this is an incredibly spiritually charged time for me and my housemates methinks. inch resting #we are planning to sit down and pray together as a house for a while tomorrow. so we shall see what the Lord does!)

15 notes · View notes

catkin-morgs-kookaburralover · 1 year

Text

friendly reminder that self harm is lying to you

#the worst is when it promises you'll feel better and then you simply. do not. you feel worse and then you want to harm again bc surely that #will make you feel better right? THAT WOULD BE A NO. IT DOES NOT.#anyway today i went to spotlight cause i was sad cause i got the result for my 35% assignment i really struggled with. 32.5%. failure.#and at spotlight i made the foolish error of buying without knowing price. but like who makes a book a normal softcover crochet pattern boo #$55?! anyway it's a lovely book and am excited to try a few of teh patterns but the guilt is eating me alive #and also im super stressed about the assignment i have to turn in on thursday and haven't started #anyway i was literally four and a half hours away from being seven days clean #and i am just so sad right now #and i reopened one of the scars on my wrist too while on shift this morning so that's fun #not badly but it's just gonna mean it scars even more isn't it because of course #i was feeling incredibly awful for some reason i can't even remember and i kinda clawed up my arms. and no i don't count that as #breaking my streak bc it didn't cause much damage #i just. placement is so wonderful but life is so so hard #i don't know i want a hug and the assignment done and everything bad unmade #and the scars i have to look at every day on placement gone.#i want to talk to s but i haven't responded to her last message and i don't know how to respond but i need to respond to that #:((#honestly actually i think i want to talk to aunty. friend's mum. in person. and get a hug. i want a hug.#im just. So Sad. and i want my brother and Ransom and this is not helpinga nd i don't know what would if anything

32 notes · View notes

toastsnaffler · 10 months

Text

in a hilarious turn of events my flatmate didn't even know I use any pronouns....

#i thought when she was talking abt how her parents thought i was gonna come out as trans and kept checking my name/pronouns-#that the joke was that im ALREADY trans but in ways they dont know abt.... but nope she genuinely didnt know 🤭#to be fair. i dont rly let anyone in on my gender business unless we're close enough to be dating or its an anonymous online space #like im legally cis and thats fine. idc abt ppl using my name + she/her bc thats not my gender identity its just AN identity that i use-#to navigate the world without ppl being fucking nosy bc i pass as + am sociopolitically treated as a woman (if butch lol)#to ppl who are friends ill joke that my gender is dyke (true) and to friends whose gender falls on a similar spectrum-#or who are transmasc ill talk a little more honestly abt it bc theyre usually able to understand better than anyone else #other butch dykes w a weird gender going on are the only motherfuckers who actually Get It but theyre hard to come by tbh #to be frank i dont fucking know whats going on w my gender. and i dont rly care enough to do the introspection to figure it out rn #i have so many other problems in my life and im lucky that most of my beef w gender can be solved by presenting butch + binding #and using any pronouns around other queer ppl. its actually incredibly funny to me when ppl she/her me bc its like tch. this chump hasnt #unlocked my level of gender yet. pronouns and names in general are so far disconnected from the way i exist in the world...#its just smth thats fun for me to play around with + makes me feel weird sometimes but in ways i havent distilled yet yknow #and this has been my approach to gender for like?? 4-5 years now??? and likely will continue to be for a long while..#anyway. its not actually that surprising my flatmate doesnt know bc shes cis so ive never felt compelled to have a deeper conversation #abt gender with her. but also i could sweeaaar its been mentioned bc almost all our other friends are trans lol #and also ive been introducing myself at queer sports socials w any pronouns and i swear i talked abt that w her..... whatever #and my pronouns are on discord and shes def seen my tumblr before but maybe i didnt have them in my bio at the time... i digress #i kind of prefer cis ppl she/hering me tbh. theyre not able to they them or he him or whatever else me in a way that matters.....#altho i do find it fascinating when she or other ppl elect to use neutral or masculine terms for me. raising an eyebrow and taking notes #like when she got a job and joked abt me being her househusband.. pulling up the fem/masc tally chart and chalking a line up #a la nona the ninth.... ive been trying to figure out whos inhabiting this body my entire fucking life with no luck girl #ANYWAY just smth to think abt. im so tired i think my brain is gonna start seeping out my eyeballs #im gonna watch some more pluto and read and then -> 🛌#another 6:30 start tomorrow woohoo #.diaries #zzzzz

18 notes · View notes

justalittlebluetiefling · 5 months

Text

.

#personal shit below the tags #just venting about getting dragged into high school drama as an adult #which is my fault because i help coach a high school dance team #long story short my best friend is moving out of the state and won't be coaching next year #and is trying to set it up so i take over as head coach #but she was talking to two of the kids about it today to give them a preliminary heads up and #they straight up said that if the current assistant coach gets the job #none of the team will be going back #but that if i get the job everyone will come back #this grown ass woman has thought i've been trying to take her assistant coach job all year #when i have been perfectly happy as a volunteer #and this whole thing was extremely validating and such a bummer all at once because like #i just won't engage with the drama she's been trying to bring and it bums me out that the kids have noticed it #i've been trying really hard to stay professional in front of them and thought i was doing a good job #i HAVE been doing a good job #but the captain knows what i'm like as a coach because i was her head coach her freshman year and so she's noticed the difference in me #so yeah incredibly validating because every time i've been down this year about this #i've been like 'they know which of us is here for THEM and not the STATUS'#and it turns out i was correct this whole time #they DO know and they have been feeling it which is the last thing i wanted for them #so yeah validating and a bummer all at once #we'll find out within the next couple weeks if i will still be coaching next year #every time i vent about this i feel like i'm trying to sound like i have the moral high ground #it gives me the ick about myself

14 notes · View notes

astridthevalkyrie · 8 months

Text

everything you see ab being the oldest daughter is true btw why am i the family therapist AND punching bag smh

long ass depressing rant in the tags srry i got a wee bit emotional

#my dad has something going on where there's a ringing in his ear my mom has tendonitis and neck pain now #and i feel for both of them i'm goin to cvs to get the meds giving my mom massages every night talking to my dad to distract him #they're both going to the correct doctors #but just throwing it out there i have had tendonitis and chronic upper back pain for 5-6 years and no one gave a shit most i've gotten is #jokes that i'm faking it #i'm in physical therapy for my back NOW but that's bc i finally crawled out of the depression long enough to do it myself #which is fine whatever i'm 22 i should be the one making my own appointments and it'd be weird if i wasn't #but when i was 16 or 17???#being hospitalized for STRESS HEADACHES at 14 too???#who gets hospitalized for that shit and how were my parents not concerned that i at the age of 14 was #so stressed out that my head was pounding all the time #and bc i'm the third parent who has to be the only emotional safe space #i don't say anything if my sisters are rude to me bc at least they feel safe enough around me to be rude to me #i have to listen to everyone and their momma's problems #i'm in law school!!! i do not need this i'm anxious all the time!!!#and if i'm not anxious i'm depressed!!!#my therapist point blank tells me shit like 'you're incredibly lonely' or 'you have way too much on your shoulders' and it makes me CRY #the most basic fucking observations that i KNOW but hearing someone else acknowledge it and not berate me fucking sends me into TEARS #i get messages from online friends here like 'hey i saw your post you don't deserve that' i physically cannot keep my eyes dry!!#every time i have any interaction ever i am at least a little uncomfortable bc i am always trying so hard to make sure i come off as kind #and not awkward or mean #i feel like everyone around me was given some kind of how to manual on life that i wasn't #and i KNOW this is not unique tons and tons of people feel like this #i know this is the depression and the anxiety and the possible autism i'm well aware #but then every couple of days my mom gets the brilliant idea to tell me i'm rude or lazy or whatever and i lose my shit #i just wanna sleep and write fanfics in the nicest way possible i hate everyone #i will try my best to not be mean to anyone bc no one deserves it but i am angry and i am constantly feeling the hurt of my inner child #my MOTHER threw a hardcover book at my HEAD when i was ten bc i had been reading and hid the book under the pillow #what the actual fuck????#my dad's response to any and everything is to deal with it

16 notes · View notes

llycaons · 2 months

Text

one of the prev posts I was like oh cql? on the url and they WERE cql...but their top tag was...bad....but I don't even have the energy to refute their nonsensical arguments for it because like that's not what shipping really is about but also THEY REALLY THINK JC IS *THE ONE* TO MAKE WWX HAPPY AND LWJ IS BORING???? incest aside like jc makes wwx MISERABLE jfc canonically yeah lwj does make wwx happy and jc is left miserable and alone due to the consequenves of his actions including actively tormenting and mocking and humiliating and trying to kill wwx. go die mad about it 😭

#like 'wow their love for each other is so crazy and all-consuming its insane to thibk some boring lan cultivator could do that for him'#WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT!!!!! their relationship is so unhealthy and marred by debt and obligations in the FIRST PLACE #and even without that yeah there's love there but they also just don't see eye to eye on so many things and jc actively impedes #wwx in things he wants or believes in and also treats him like shit like this is fully a sector of the fanbase who are just making things u #in their own head to enjoy #which would be mildly annoying if not for the fact that it's 1. INCEST #and 2. between two characters with THAT kind of history. wwx needs someone he can like...trust..#okay I guess I donhave the energy. I'm less angry at them calling lwj boring. yeah he is kind of boring but that's fine #wwx canonically doesn't think so and canonically is very happy w him #these bitches think his arguably abusive extremely immature and volatile pseudo-brother who tortured and tried to kill him is BETTER FOR HI #?????? brother jc is not better for ANYONE. there's loving someone and there's wanting to be around them and shit. like there's so much #history there it's lucky if they can even be friends again #like 🤢🤢🤢 what the fuck are you on. the narrative was pretty clear. media comprehension -100000 #I don't even think this person is unintelligent or anything they just have incredibly bad and nonsensical taste #or at least used to. idk how old those posts were I fully admit #wwx with anyone besides lwj is a hard sell but jc is beyond insane for multiple reasons #even if you 'don't see them as brothers' which is an interpretation I guess they still have a horrible relationship #and jc makes wwx feel terrible bc he has a bad personality and blames wwx for all the most painful things that happened to him and he lashe #out constantly. like he canonically makes wwx miserable and forces him to prioritize jcs own emotional and physical needs. by the end he's #a little better. but he's also not the moral beacon wwx gravitates towards. he's pragmatic and callous #wwx NEEDS someone he can trust someone who shares his principles someone who will take care of him and not demand him to crush inconvenient #parts of himself and play nice. to cater to someone else's feelings #like...structurally they're so well matched this post was insane I hate c/x shippers so much 😭#cor.txt

2 notes · View notes

fadeintoyou1993 · 2 months

Text

having to explain to people things like. if i have to go out to do something and run errands i need to have it all mapped out and planned w like. at least a week in advance. and if i go out that day i cannot do anything else because That will be it. if i have multiple commitments that cannot be put on the same day i need one full day in between those commitments so i can rest and be recharged for that next thing otherwise i might have a breakdown in the middle of the street (again) and then That will render me unable to function for like a whole three days. and then people look at me like i choose to live like this?

#txt #audhd tag #just venting a little #its crazy because ppl around me are like I understand your limitations However why dont you-#So you dont understand my limitations?#like okay yeah i understand that it must be Weird for people that are not Inside my brain and hard to understand that i PHYSICALLY CANNOT>#do things that they dont even think about. alright! but to sit and tell me Yeah we get it! but then try to either fix it or >#> come up w a New Incredible Way To Fix Me as if half of what i talk abt w my therapist isnt Exactly This #like yeah i dont fucking like it either. i wish i could do shit like other ppl do. i wish i could remember things.#i wish i didnt feel exhausted all the time i wish simply leaving my bed wasnt the most difficult task every single morning #but it pisses me OFF when people try to talk me through these Limitations i have that They Understand<3 like. can you be accommodating or no #one of my closest friends and oldest friends since i was like 5 had her bday on friday and she ljterally messaged me like #Hi we r having something w my family but theyre rly loud and extremist on the right wing side and i barely wanna be here u dont have 2 come>#> but i wanted to invite u anyway so u dont think ur being left out! and i was like Yayy nice thank u bc lbr i probably wouldnt go anyway.#and she KNOWS that. and she literally was talking to me like she alwahs does and That felt accommodating and understanding and i felt loved #cut to my mom last night trying to make me feel guilty for not going because Shes my friend and i should have gone anyway.#i told her off and she backtracked but thats still innmy head like. that shit is so irritating #okay sorry vent over im just aboht to get my period so this is making me sick #want to yell into the void and forget about it. Hits post

5 notes · View notes

impossible-rat-babies · 3 months

Text

🧍‍♂️maybe after this expansion is when eyrie tries to reach out to their brother

#the themes really got me in this one folks #me sobbing while messaging a friend it was supposed to be a summer vacation…..#it’s like…if there is a chance for them to reconnect in some manner #or to say what had been needed to be said…it’s important #I do think eyrie opens up at some points to wuk lamat about their family #and about their brother #it’s…incredibly messy and directionless talking on eyrie’s part #bc they are trying so hard to be vocally earnest #but they do talk about it #and it makes the idea of talking to him feel less out of reach #it’s the issue of them hoarding onto these feelings for 20+ years #owen talks

3 notes · View notes