#tagging this because I want people to stop being weird and mean towards her

[tit-mouse]

The longer I think about it the more I seriously ship link and yona

[bonny-kookoo]

Yoonkook

𝓓𝓸 𝓡𝓮 𝓜𝓲 [Part 1]

There's something happening.

Tags/Warnings: Vampire!Yoongi, Vampire!Jungkook, Human!Reader, Angst, poly AU, emotional confusion, blood (duh), fluff, romance

Length: uh 2k I think

There is no taglist for this fic.

-> Masterlist

🩸.━━━━━━━━━━.❤️.━━━━━━━━━━━.🩸

True to what you've told him in the car, you didn't really reply to any of Jungkook's messages for the rest of the day of the donation.

And while the vampire had been a little worried, Yoongi had reassured him that you seemed competent enough to seek out help if you need it, and that he shouldn't feel bad for taking the chance of your donation. You'd done what you did because you clearly wanted it- not because you felt obligated to do so.

And today, you've begun to be texting a lot more.

Jungkook is glued to his phone the entire day it seems like, and Yoongi can't say it upsets him too much. Jungkook craves friendships and social contact sometimes- something that doesn't come too easy when in a situation similar to his. People infected with vampirism tend to be avoided, no matter the circumstances of their initial infection.

It's like people stop listening after hearing that yes, it can be infectious- healthy people without the infection simply take that fact without looking into it, and run with it.

It's how the stigma had evolved in the first place- parents telling their children not to believe anything they teach about vampirism in schools, churches call infected people demons, and the elderly refuse to be taken care of by vampire staff at care homes or hospitals. Most companies won't even hire people with the infection, and they don't have to- there's no law protecting vampires, after all.

So, Jungkook has been rather lonely.

Apart from Yoongi and Seokjin, he doesn't really have any friends, and his parents had cut contact the moment he was diagnosed. So Yoongi can understand how excited he must feel at the prospect of making a new friend. And he also can't deny that he himself isn't at least slightly interested in you as well.

"How is she doing?" Yoongi asks as soon as he notices Jungkook's facial expression darken a little. The young vampire scratches the edge of his chin for a second, before he answers.

"I mean, she said 'good', but I don't know." He hums to himself. "I feel like I should like, maybe check? Ah, I don't know, this is so weird.." He mumbles more or less to himself, and Yoongi becomes interested.

It couldn't be that Jungkook and you.. no, could it?

"If you're really that worried, ask her if you can visit." Yoongi shrugs, well aware his partner won't really be able to rest easy unless he's got proof of your wellbeing. He's just compassionate like that- he's awfully empathetic towards everyone around him he cares about. It's something that's used for personal gain left and right- and Yoongi hates it.

Though he hopes you're not one to use him.

"Or.. what if we invite her over so she can eat with us?" Jungkook asks. "I don't want you to be alone." He complains, while Yoongi sighs.

"You know I don't mind being my myself, Jungkook." He reassures the younger vampire. "Go and visit her, it's not that big of a deal.." He mumbles to himself as he puts the last dishes on the side to let them dry.

"I mean, I know you don't mind it." Jungkook offers, hugging his partner from behind. "But that doesn't mean you should be so okay with it. You deserve to have friends too."

Yoongi is quiet for a moment, simply enjoys the close proximity, before he sighs. "Alright. Ask her what she likes to eat, we can order something in." He caves in, making Jungkook smile and eagerly run to grab his phone again so he can text you the new idea for the night. "Ah, and if she wants to drink something she can sleep over on the couch!" He calls to Jungkook, who gives an agreeing reply back as he texts you in the living room, sat on the couch.

Only a few hours later, you're calling Jungkook, who suddenly gets up to look out the window of the apartment the two vampires live in where he can see the bus stop. "Are you wearing the pink coat?" Jungkook asks into his phone, earning Yoongi's attention, as the younger vampire sighs. "You were supposed to tell me when we should pick you up! It's raining so much!" He whines in complaint, rushing to grab his own jacket and an umbrella, before slipping into his shoes to walk out the door, leaving Yoongi to search for the mentioned pink coat- and he finds it, standing beneath the somewhat shielded bus stop. You're stubborn, that's clear- he'd told Jungkook to not give away any hint at their address to you, because you'd surely go out to get here yourself instead of asking for someone to pick you up instead. And it turns out he was right.

Yoongi helps you take off your coat as you step inside, thanking him for the kind gesture before you slip out of your shoes. "Sorry-" you start, somewhat fixing your hair a bit. "-I just didn't want either of you guys to drive in that weather." You laugh, making Yoongi shake his head.

"No worries." He brushes it off, before he leads you into the living room. As you sit on the couch, you look around- noticing how long they both must be living together already for the entire apartment to look this.. alive.

"You have a lot of workout equipment." You notice as the oldest vampire sets a glass of water in front of you before Jungkook enters the room as well, jumping over the back of the couch to sit on it next to you.

"Yeah, that's mine, but Yoongi uses it too sometimes." He shrugs. "Mostly me though. It's like a hobby."

"Oh, that sounds nice." You agree. "You're very conscious about your body?" You wonder, and Yoongi chimes in from the side as he sits down as well, though a bit further away from you.

"He has to be, as a vampire." He says.

It's quiet for a moment, since you don't know what to say to that, really. You've noticed while Yoongi doesn't wear any identification at all, Jungkook still has his ID tag on his wrist, meaning that he's not been infected for long enough, or hasn't been evaluated either. "Oh, don't worry about that." Jungkook suddenly says a bit bashful, having noticed your eyes on the silver bracelet around his wrist. "I'm totally fine to be around. I just.. haven't gotten around to get tested yet." He tries to justify.

"Oh no, don't worry, I didn't mean to stare!" You wave him off. "I was just in thoughts." You laugh.

"Then think about what you want to eat first." Yoongi tells you a bit roughly, making Jungkook sigh as he leads you to sit on the couch together with him to look through the takeout menu on the little tablet he picks up from the coffee table.

"Yoongi just sounds a bit mean." He reassures you. "I promise he's actually a really nice guy."

"Have you been together long?" You wonder, tapping on the items you'd want to eat.

"Uh.. kind of? It's hard to explain, really." Jungkook chuckles. We're.. we have like a platonic, but also romantic kind of relationship. I know it sounds kind of weird." He sighs a bit uneasy, but you shake your head.

"Not at all, don't worry." You shrug him off. "I mean, if some people can have sex but not a relationship, why can't others have it the other way around?" You just say, making Jungkook look at you almost in wonder, before he snaps his attention back to the tablet when Yoongi reaches over his boyfriend's shoulder to tap some items into the order himself, resting his chin on Jungkook's shoulder for a moment.

"Oh, let me get my wallet real quick-" You move to get up to fetch your bag- but a hand grabs at your sweater easily, keeping you on the couch. You look back to spot Yoongis eyes on you, chin still on Jungkook's shoulder, before he shakes his head and stands up properly again, letting go of both of you.

"Don't bother. It's fine." He reassures you, leaving to do something in the kitchen you can't see.

"Alright, next time you come over to my place then, and I'll cook." You tell Jungkook. "Please- or I'll feel bad eternally, and you'll never hear the end of it! I'll haunt you to pay back the food, I swear!" You threaten the vampire, who can't help but laugh at the finger pointing at his chest.

"You're cute." He comments, causing you to laugh as well.

Later on, you're all a little tipsy from the beer, and sluggish from all the food you've eaten. You're nodding off against Jungkook's shoulder as the movie slowly comes to an end, your eyes closed as unbeknownst to you, Yoongi adjusts the blanket over your shoulders to make sure you stay comfortable.

You're very easy to be around, even for him- and he's actually not that social, usually hates anybody visiting at all. But he'd invited you simply to kind of pay you back- but now that you're here, he doesn't actually mind you all that much, if at all.

Jungkook seems very comfortable with you as well- the younger vampire having easily fallen into conversation with you as you two drank and laughed over jokes only you two seemed to understand. But even then, you always remembered and attempted to make Yoongi feel included.

And maybe that's the most unique thing.

It's only one single day, a little more than five hours, and he already has an odd feeling about you. And the weirdest thing about it, is that he feels so good around you it's intimidating to him. He never really felt so drawn to a person before than he does to you- he wants to hear you talk even if it's about nonsense, he wants to know how you feel, what you like, what you hate, what annoys you, and what makes you happy.

For a second, truly so, he thought it was just some.. dumb sexual need. A fantasy almost that his mind, or rather dick, came up with- because you are, absolutely, pretty. He'd never be able to deny that.

But he doesn't actually really think about that- not entirely at least. You get along so well with Jungkook and himself, as if there's nothing different about them compared to you at all. And maybe, just maybe, there's a chance at this already odd relationship he has with Jungkook could become just a bit weirder, because in a way, Yoongi can't help but feel like nothing is impossible when it comes to you.

Though, that creates a new predicament.

How does he propose this idea, without potentially scaring both of you off?

[oscconfessions]

people should stop portraying book as some little shy girl who "made some mistakes in the past but is ok now" or whatever because that's so booooring and just barely scraping the surface of her character. she should be allowed to be mean to people and have negative emotions and be wrong sometimes, actually.

canon book in tpot also kinda has this problem where she's just portrayed in the most boring way possible that's not like. ooc but just like the super watered down version of her from bfdia. modern bfdia gets like a pass for this because yeah she's supposed to be portrayed as a pushover on that team. but keeping her that way is so weird because it just goes back on the "development" (using that term VERY lightly because the show is kind of weird about her character during the time) in BFB that literally shows she doesn't want to be a pushover anymore and wants to start actually standing up for herself and her friends (her not joining back with pencil for iance and her calling out taco for abandoning the team).

i think bfb portraying her at a negative extreme is good because it manages to be reasonable within her character (it's not really written WELL but that doesn't mean it's ooc some of you just think of it as ooc because you expect book to be some nice little polite girl all the time even when bfdia has shown her being incredibly petty at times and not, in fact, nice all the time) while still going out and doing something unique w/ her and giving her more glaringly obvious flaws. i wish these flaws were shown more post-bfb because Hey, book can be a better person and not at that extreme negative and still have flaws. that's how you make her actually interesting instead of generic nice all the time character who has no issues #57. tpot really wants to show that she's changing from her past and improving on these flaws without actually /giving/ her the flaws that she's supposed to be improving on so she doesn't get any of the development that the show wants her to get/acts like she's getting.

anyways where was i this was suppsoed to be about fanon book. i like that people acknowledge her nerdiness but i dont think people get how annoying she is about it like she literally said (in front of lollipop) that lollipop was being "so out of character" and she literally has snarky definitions of the other contestants written inside of her that's so fucking obnoxious of her and i love it. and like these are still there in bfb (like her saying black hole sucks as a person because he's a pushover) so like i think it's reasonable to carry this over to tpot. maybe lessen it a bit because y'know she is actively trying to make friends but you can make her a bit of an awkward ass to people because it's funny

basically just...... make her worse. no more "cute awkward girlfail" book that's been done time and time again i want to see her suck and i want to see her be lame in a non-endearing way. tpot 10's "redemption" (FOR LACK OF BETTER TERM I DON'T THINK IT'S A REDEMPTION) scene with her and price tag talking is too happy and wholesome i want to see her have to face the ugly truth of her actions after trying to avoid her past for so long and i want her to have negative feelings towards people from her past even if unjustified and i want her to be selfish and i want her to feel bad about her own feelings (this is all said lovingly) so that when she finally moves on from it there's an actual impact on her character. you can't just treat it like she's "turning over a new leaf" with just not if you're gonna have her be the Usual Book throughout tpot. as i said earlier she doesn't get any character development like how the show says she does because there's nothing to change about her

oops again this was supposed to be about fanon. well i just really hate(?) tpot book and her impact on the way the fandom portrays book. give her back her charcter flaws and problems pretty please stop woobifying her!!! i don't think she was some awful person in bfb (i think she was. somewhat right in bfb but that's not what this is about) but i don't think her actions back then should just be brushed off because "oh that's the past and she's clearly changed!" WE DON'T EVEN GET TO SEE HER CHANGE THAT WOULD'VE BEEN INTERESTING TO SEE HER ARC IS SO SLOPPILY RESOLVED GRHGHRGJHGGHJH sorry folks i really hate #that scene in tpot 10

Also she's a butch lesbian that's not related to any of this but she came to my house personally and told me this

.

[quin-ns]

Inevitable (Kang the Conqueror x Reader)

Word count: 1.8K

Summary: you don’t know kang, but he knows you

Tags: antman and the wasp: quantumania spoilers!!, canon divergent, avenger!reader, one-sided affection, soulmates (kinda), denial

Request: anon: “Ohohoho the DRAMA of a Kang fic okok so how about an avenger who’s super powerful, and loves Scott as a friend and is a good person and has a strong moral compass, somehow they end up in the quantum realm with scott and cassie etc…. And when they meet kang it’s like he knows her… he shows her them in the future being lovers etc… it’s almost like they’re soulmates and she is horrified, she thinks he’s good looking but nuu he’s a bad guy…. How will it all turn out o.O”

A/N: loved this prompt- I did deviate a towards the end but still hope it lives up to expectations. kang was fun and interesting to write for. complex villains are the best ngl lol

cross-posted to ao3 • mcu masterlist • writing masterlist

You didn’t blame Cassie for her invention going haywire and pulling you all into the Quantum Realm. Still, it wasn’t exactly ideal.

When you, Scott, Cassie, Hope, Janet, and Hank all got sucked into the Realm, you all got separated. You, Scott, and Cassie ended up together thankfully. You could only hope that the others were all together as well.

The three of you did your best to stay out of trouble. Except that’s exactly what you got into because, well, who knows? Avengers seem to have bad luck. If you were superstitious you’d say that you and Scott both being there amplified that.

There was an attack by what you thought was a sun—you all quickly found out it wasn’t—and then some big purple… thing. You were saved, but then next thing you knew, you were being captured by what Cassie called quantum people.

Great.

They separated you and brought you to their weird town. It was a marvelous setting, but you didn’t exactly get to admire it all that much. The people surrounded you and chanted loudly, spiking your anxiety. At first you were scared, especially when they poured red ooze into your mouth. You suddenly could understand them.

The leader, Jentorra, warned you that because you were from above, he would be hunting you. The Conqueror. He didn’t sound like someone you wanted to be captured by.

The attack was sudden. Ships shooting blue lasers descended. Robots, or what you thought were robots, began to go after people. It was a mess. Some of them evacuated, some fought. You, Scott, and Cassie ran. You all knew that you were the targets and you couldn’t get captured. Not before finding the others. You saved as many people as you could along the way.

There was a giant floating metal head—MODOK is what it called itself—that stopped you.

Turns out, it was an old acquaintance of Scott (and sort of Cassie). Darren, they called him, showed his—maybe this was mean, but it was true—hilariously ugly giant face. He took you to a tower and divided the three of you into cells. Scott cracked some joke about how he had been in jail four times—one more than Cassie.

Darren revealed that he worked for the Conqueror, who built him into what he was. As it turned out, the Conqueror built a lot of what you were seeing.

You were pacing around your cell, trying to devise a plan, when the sound of heavy footsteps began to echo through the hall. It caught your attention. You watched as a man in a green and purple suit approached Scott. His face was veiled in blue and his eyes shone with the same color.

He walked right up to Scott’s cell and they began to conversate. You were diagonal to Scott and next to Cassie. You weren’t sure if the man even saw you.

You heard Scott tell him he was an Avenger, and the Conqueror casually asked if he’d killed him before. “I’ve killed so many, they start to blur together…” the Conqueror mused.

Scott asked who he was, the Conqueror told him he was the man who had lost time. He began to explain that he had a plan for Scott.

You couldn’t fully hear him, and you decided to speak before you could think to stop yourself. “Hey, if you’re revealing your evil plan, can you clue us all in?”

The Conqueror fell silent. He turned to face you. The moment he laid his eyes on, a chill ran through your spine. The blue mask was gone. You could see him more clearly now. The look on his face… there was recognition in his eyes. Sure, he said he’d killed the Avengers in other universes, but this didn’t seem like that.

“Oh, you…” the Conqueror said, seemingly surprised. Pleasantly surprised. “MODOK said there was one he never met. I didn’t know it was you. I should’ve, though.”

The fact that he was handsome threw you. You were expecting someone… scarier looking? Or more alien. Although you supposed not every villain you dealt with after Thanos would be like him.

“Am I that much of a surprise?” you asked, raising your brows.

“A bit,” he admitted. “You look so… well, like you.” The Conqueror approached your cell, Scott forgotten.

“Okay, what does that even mean?”

“I haven’t seen you in so long,” he sighed out. There was a longing in his eyes that seemed so out of place given everything you knew about the man. “It’s good to see you.”

“I don’t know you,” you told him, shaking your head.

“Oh, but you do,” he replied smoothly.

The barrier on your cell dissipated suddenly. The Conqueror extended his hand out to you, passing easily through the barrier that had once been.

“If you would come with me, Y/N.”

You hated the way he said your name. There was an unearned sense of familiarity. Despite the allure in his tone and the gesture of his hand, you ignored it. The Conqueror let out a sigh. He turned on his heel and began walking away. Slowly. Waiting for you to follow him like he knew you would.

You looked to Scott’s cell. His eyes found yours. He didn’t speak, but he was trying to warn you silently.

That was Scott, always looking out for you. But if you had a chance to negotiate, maybe get you all home unhurt. You had to try, right?

You stepped out of the cell. The Conqueror hadn’t gone out of sight. The moment he heard your movement, he halted his own. You didn’t know the man, but you could see the victorious smile he wore before he even turned to face you.

“I knew you couldn’t resist,” he said knowingly. You began walking towards him cautiously. “I have something to show you, dear. I think you’ll find it quite enlightening.”

You stopped next to him, jaw clenched. “Who are you?” you questioned. “I want a name.”

“Kang,” he revealed. “You can call me Kang.”

You nodded. Okay, that was something. You waited for him to lead the way, and he did. He didn’t offer his hand again, he realized you had no intention of making contact with him.

You looked over your shoulder one last time. You couldn’t see Cassie from the angle you were at, but you gave Scott an assuring look. The one he returned didn’t quite match your confidence.

“I have to say, I wasn’t expecting to see you here,” Kang revealed once the two of you were alone.

“Yeah, because this is what I had on my schedule today,” you replied sarcastically.

Kang let out a laugh. It was short, but genuine. It was an odd sound to hear from someone who’d sent an army to take out civilians. That reminded you that you in fact should be scared of him.

You arrived in what appeared to be the center of Kang's tower—or whatever the hell he wanted to call it. It didn’t matter what it was, it was where he had been leading you.

“What’s on your mind?” the Conqueror asked, looking your way. You were put off by sincere curiosity.

“Okay, what is going on?” You couldn’t keep it in any longer. “Why did you bring me here? Huh? Why just me?”

“Nice to know some things never change,” Kang said, mind distant for a moment. Then, his gaze refocused on yours. “You always were a curious one.”

“Stop talking like you know me!” you snapped.

Kang remained eerily calm. “But I do. That’s what I wanted to show you.”

Without further word, Kang turned his attention to—well, you weren’t sure what it was. Your best guess was something similar to a projector. He did something, you couldn’t tell what, but suddenly beams of light shot out of it.

In front of you was a projected image of… you? You weren’t alone, though. At your side was the Conqueror himself. His arm was around your waist and your head was resting against his shoulder. You were both dressed formally. You couldn’t tell where the two of you were or what you were looking at, though.

The way the projection displayed, you were staring into your own eyes. It was unnerving to say the least.

“I liked this universe,” Kang spoke up. You nearly jumped, suddenly becoming aware of the fact that he was at your side in reality as well. “We had a lovely wedding.”

Your head snapped to him, unable to believe his words. Kang looked at you and let out a content sigh. “We’re married in a lot of universes. And even in the ones where we aren’t, we’re bonded.”

“You must’ve forced me.” It was the only explanation you could think of. “You say you’ve killed the Avengers—I’d never abandon my friends to love someone who’d do that.”

“There was no force.” He sounded briefly offended before regaining composure. “As for the ‘why’?” Kang allowed a small smirk to cross his face. “I won’t spoil the ending, dear, but I’ve seen it. I’ve seen every ending.”

“Why are you showing me this?” you asked.

“Because, I need your help. Well, you and your friend. Scott, right?” he finally recalled. “I need to get out of here,” Kang explained.

“I saw what you did to those people,” you argued. “Why would I help you?”

“My future directly impacts yours,” he explained simply. “If I get out of here, you could come with me.”

You let out a mocking laugh at that. “No way. I already told you, I’d never be with someone who has done the things you’ve done.”

He looked offended. Hurt, even? But it wasn’t like you lied. There was even a flash of anger but he regained composure.

Kang stepped close to you and you stepped back. Behind him, the holographic image changed. You and Kang. Then it changed again, then again. Picking up speed. You were watching as your future in hundreds of different universes played out. Different paths, different lives, but they all ended up the same way. With Kang.

He was proving a point.

“You and I are inevitable, Y/N. In every universe where we exist,” the Conqueror revealed calmly—calculating—and continued to approach you.

You shook your head. “No,” you stated firmly.

Kang tilted his head slightly, eyeing you curiously. “You really believe that, don’t you?”

It was right in front of your eyes and yet you refused to accept it. “I know it’s not true.”

“You don’t know anything,” he dismissed passively. Like he just knew he was right and didn’t see the need to genuinely argue. “Not yet, at least.”

It wasn’t until Kang’s hand rose to your face, his gloved hand brushing your cheek, that you’d realized you had fallen still in front of him.

“But you will see,” he revealed in a way that you could only label as ominous. “You always do.”

[windstir]

thinking about that scene in kaze to ki no uta where gilbert is just having fun playing tag with some adults, specifically this one girl called sophia/sofia and she's like, treating him so well, and gilbert doesn't have a mother so auguste KNOWS that the poor thing (7 years old) is seeking her attention in replacement for anne marie's neglect, and so he just goes and says "okay fun is over i need you to come here now" and someone (rebec) mentions how gilbert's light "faded" at that very moment.

"that look isn't normal in a child! that's the face of resignation, he's suppressed all his instinct to fight ..."

and then gilbert (who is 7 at the time, it's been 2 years since the abuse started) walks away with auguste.

there's SO much to say starting with the fact that gilbert's attitude is nothing like the one we're shown in the actual timeline (this is from a flashback) and he's, basically, a whole different person in comparison, which fits with the way auguste raised him.

since his purpose was to make a "perfect masterpiece", he had to strip gilbert of who he was from the root, first attacking his "survival instincts", then treating him as if he was incapable of doing anything or learning anything despite the fact that gilbert taught himself to read (at like, 6-7) because he was interested in art, and so on, auguste is just taking away bits and pieces of gilbert to make him what he wants him to be, but he's never clear with what he's demanding of him so gilbert is a mess

the scene also highlights how he flinches at the sight of auguste, and looks nervous when he approaches him and sofia, but when auguste gives his final veredict (that "playtime is over") he just leaves without saying much, because he knows it's pointless, auguste will do anything to drive the people who care about gilbert away even if they will never do anything to stop the abuse. gilbert knows this subconsciously, i doubt he can explain it, but i think there's some level of acknowledgment on his part.

gilbert is not entirely lost at this point though, he's on his way out but he has some of his instincts, he knows that auguste means danger (also shown by their first meeting, gilbert just keeps repeating "danger, he's dangerous, he'll do something to me". this eventually stops as gilbert realizes auguste is the only person around him who "cares" -it stops after their encounter, the one right after bonnard kidnaps him- and instead of pushing him away, he starts to want to be around him more, the evident fear is no longer there, but auguste still haunts his decisions and the way he interacts with others -serge-)

now, remember rebec???? he knows about the abuse, he's definitely worried about the impact it has on gilbert, but he never does anything to stop it because auguste is a close friend of his. i won't go into detail but. that's realistic!!!! okay ending this point to add:

i think the way gilbert was written and described is really good, and as much as i HATE auguste he's also pretty well written too in a weird way. he has many flaws, but he's a perfect "villain" for this i think.

think of humbert humbert from lolita as a base, both of them use flowery language to make their acts sound less terrible (auguste constantly describes his acts towards gilbert as art, as "necessary for his development", as something that's right despite it not being so)

see 41:50 - 43:40

(it's not really evident in this scene i think? but you can see the way he speaks about it, he makes it sound as if it was something necessary, as if it was something that gilbert will benefit from even though it's just abuse)

gilbert IS a different person than he was years ago, and the only person to blame is auguste, that one scene i mentioned at the beginning is just a transition period between point A (rejection, fear, gilbert doesn't want to indulge in this) and point B (acceptance, he's actively seeking it even if he hates it)

gilbert has never wanted to do this, all he wanted was to be held by someone because everyone around him neglected that need, as serge said once: "he was starved (of love) and i could provide him with that"

but, eventually, he learned to suppress that need and, as the world changed his view on him (hypersexual behaviors that were previously encouraged are now seen as strange and gross, gilbert doesn't understand why the change) gilbert just had to go with it, accepting that he would always be seen as someone bad no matter what, he thinks he's broken in some way, that he will corrupt others if they dare to help him, which i think it's a key point to understand if you want to understand why he acts the way he does towards serge:

"doesn't he hate it? if he does, why is he pushing serge (the only person who ACTUALLY helps him) away?"

because he doesn't THINK he deserves it, he thinks he's going to corrupt serge if he does, everyone thinks that, everyone stays in their lane, no one has ever done anything to stop it and when they tried they were pushed away by auguste, and gilbert wanted auguste's approval! he wants him to like him! so he continues, and the cycle never ends ...

[kyhgwts]

part2 of my steddie short story!

And again, because i am so so so so so thankful. I did not at all expect for my short story to get so much love! It makes me so happy people are enjoying what i write. Being a writer has honestly helped me a lot, i start to feel like a mom when i’m texting now. All my friends write in run on sentences, and it gets me so mad! But enough of that. I just wanted to say thank you, to everyone who interacted and helped me to get to this point. Tags: @e0509 @tayhar811 @kellynickelsgirl00 @jessetalexis-blog @steveharringtonsnailedbat @cherrycolas-things @playfuloutcast @forksloree @beckkthewreck

______

‘You’re starving our poor girl’ Eddie says, Steve just makes a grunt rolling his eyes.

‘She’s not starved, i fuck her when she asks’ Steve said in defense.

‘Only when she asks? She’s a shy girl yeah? She’s not gonna always tell you Steven, you got to be able to read her’ Eddie says.

You had been asleep, Steve coming home early. Steve leans against the counter his head hanging through his arms.

‘Read her?’ Steve asks, Eddie rolls his eyes.

Steve had never really been the type, he was all consensual king. Sure he had fun in high school but he liked to leave that behind.

‘Yes read her. You’ve got to be able to tell when she wants something.’ Eddie says, and Steve really hates he has to say this.

‘i dunno how to do that’ he mumbles turning around to the fridge, opening it and getting a bottle of water.

Eddie grins, because he can tell Steve is embarrassed. He knows Steve doesn’t like to admit that.

‘Well first off, she’s shy. But surprisingly when she wants something it’s very obvious. Last night i realized she does this thing with her hands.’ Eddie says, mocking your movements of twisting your fingers together.

‘She does that when she’s anxious’ Steve says, Eddie shakes his head.

‘No sir, you are wrong. She does it when she wants something from you. I mean, it doesn’t always have to be sexual. But she does it before she’s about to ask you.’ Eddie says, Steve gave a weird look.

‘How did you learn this in one night’ Steve says raising his eyebrow.

‘Okay, so anything else?’

‘i think she has a daddy kink’ Eddie adds on as if it was nothing, Steve holds up his hand.

‘Wait wait wait, slow down. A daddy kink? what the fuck do you mean’ Steve says, Eddie stares at Steve a little bit longer to see if he’s joking.

‘oh dear god,’ he mumbled ‘you know, and you’d think you were the virgin’ Steve mouth hangs open.

‘It’s not my fault you-‘

‘i’m what?’ Eddie says, Steve cowers.

‘I don’t know! sex god i suppose, you know everything’ Steve says, Eddie actually laughs at this head thrown back.

‘Steve, do you not know what a daddy kink is?’ Eddie asks, Steve narrows his eyes.

‘Well- yeah? She calls you Daddy that’s what-‘

‘Not just that, it’s like…’ Eddie thinks trying to find his words. ‘She likes to be taken cared of, and babied’

‘Babied?’ Steve furrows his eyebrows.

‘Okay so… how is she gonna start doing that do we have to tell her’ Eddie laughed, Steve was so lost.

‘No if you just get her far enough in her head she will, it’s all about getting her to that space’ Eddie says, Steve nods.

‘I’m gonna go wake her up’ Steve says, walking off to his room. Eddie just grins watching him.

—

You were under Eddie as he kissed down your throat. You mewled, hands in his hair.

Steve was watching you two, and it enlightened something in him.

The noises you were making as Eddie practically attacked your neck, it made Steve rethink his whole life.

During sex, you had never really been like this to Steve. You were so desperate and clingy towards Eddie. And sure you were with Steve too but, it was different somehow.

‘mm’ want em off’ you whine pulling at your t-shirt, Eddie quickly got up from your neck pulling your shirt off. Leaving you in only underwear.

‘These’ you protest pulling your underwear down, before you could fully pull them down, your hands were stopped by Eddie.

‘You gotta slow your roll pretty girl’ Eddie says laughing, Steve’s eyes widen when you obey.

You whimper when Eddie began to circle your clit with his thumb. Making you twist your fingers, Eddie noticed and turned to Steve. Steve nodded to tell Eddie he understood.

‘What do you want princess, hm?’ Eddie asked, the way he asked it made you feel embarrassed and comfortable all at the same time.

‘You’ you whine, you try to move your hands but Eddie grabs both putting them above your head. You make a pout, making him laugh at you. Eddie pulls down your underwear, you now smile in triumph.

When your underwear was off, and thrown on the floor Steve almost groaned. The way you had been acting towards Eddie was making Steve insane.

You whine, bucking your hips when his fingers swipe up your pussy.

‘Look, she’s already wanting me again and i just helped her last night.’ Eddie teased, making you furrow your brows together in annoyance. Eddie turns to Steve.

‘Now steve, this, is what you do for consent.’ Eddie begins, turning back to you.

‘We gotta make you a safe word, what’s your favorite color sweetheart’ Eddie says, Steve is about to say it but Eddie throws a hand back to stop him.

‘Brown,’ you mumble.

‘S’ like your eyes’ you say smiling fondly, Steve rolls his eyes.

‘Did you tell her to do-‘ Steve didn’t really quite get was going on, obviously.

‘Steve, baby imma need you to shut the hell up.’ Eddie says, Steve shuts his mouth immediately.

baby

‘Alright, brown is your safe word okay, so anytime you want me to stop, you say that word alright?’ Eddie says, you nod breathlessly.

‘Steve, i want you to watch her very closely. You’ll notice she gets more distant, okay. That’s a sub space,’ he explains, Steve nods. ‘and don’t ruin it or i’ll murder you’ He threatens quietly so you don’t hear.

‘Okay’ Steve whispers, turning to watch you. You were looking up at Eddie like he owned the world. Your eyes blown wide and puppy like.

Your hands flew out to grab onto him, clawing at his shirt trying to pull at it. You went silent when he began to pull his shirt off swiftly, throwing it to the ground.

You smile sheepishly, feeling his stomach and his abs. He grins as he pulls off his boxers. Your eyes now look down at that, your stomach churns.

He was big, very big actually. He wasn’t as long as Steve, but he definitely beat Steve in thickness.

Steve could see your eyes, you looked so distant. 

You wanted to clench your thighs to relief yourself but Eddie’s hands held apart your thighs. You huff out a frustrated sigh. Eddie looks up at you and laughs, you had the meanest look on your face.

‘what do you want, hm? Sweet girl?’ He says, hands rubbing up and down your thighs.

‘you’ you whine, Eddie shakes his head.

‘you gotta be more specific sweets’ Eddie says, you stare at him with annoyance.

‘you know what i want.’ you say sassiness filled in your tone, hands moving to grab him in your hands. He immediately takes hold of both your wrists and slams them above your head. You whimper trying to move your hands, his grip tight.

‘It isn’t hard. why do you have the need to be a brat? huh?’ he says, Steve can see your eyes go big and wide. Steve trusted Eddie, and he knew Eddie would never hurt you.

‘m’ not a brat’ you protest meanly, squirming in his hold. He leans down mouth right next to your ear.

‘If you keep that attitude up, i won’t even consider letting you come. Do you hear me?’ he says, your eyes go impossibly wide and you whimper nodding your head.

‘Now. Let’s try again, what would you like?’ he says, voice so threatening.

‘your cock’ you whisper, he breaks out in a grin. Steve shocked as hell, not once has he ever heard you talk like that.

‘good, that wasn’t so hard, was it?’ he says, you shake you head. He then let’s go of your hands, and you fall limp. Eyes dazed, he smiles at you.

‘You remember that safe word sweetheart? i’ve got to make sure you know you can change your mind’ he says, you shake your head furiously. Confused as to why he would even ask that, because all you could think about right now was him and his cock.

‘Let me hear it.’

‘brown’ your voice was so fragile, extremely soft. It didn’t even quite sound like you.

‘Good girl’ Eddie whispers, tapping the side of your thigh. You try to stifle the whimper, but it obviously failed when you can hear Eddie chuckle slightly.

You felt his tip swipe through your folds, making you whimper. Eddie smirks, his grip on your hips so tight it hurt. But it hurt good, so good. When his tip slipped into you, you hold your breath.

He was taking his time with you, letting you get so wet and needy you wanted to punch him. You groan, pushing down your hips.

‘more.’ you protest, Eddie looks up at you.

‘i’m not sure you can take it’ he challenges, you make a frown. Shaking your head, you push on his chest.

‘i can’ is all you say, now mad at him. He looks at the emotions on your face. You actually looked starved of sex, like Eddie could see it on your face.

‘You sure? look how small your poor pussy is baby, think she can take it?’ Eddie asks, you nod humming.

‘Yes!’ you didn’t mean to shout, quite frankly you were just mad. So far in your sub space that you didn’t care if you were acting like a brat. You just wanted him, and punishment didn’t seem too bad.

‘You’re mean’ you protest, Eddie raises an eyebrow.

‘oh?’ Eddie looks back at Steve, wondering if he’s catching this. Because this is the most he’s ever seen a girl in a sub space. Steve looks pleasantly surprised, staring at your face which is full of emotions.

‘Is that what you want? for me to be mean? is that why your so wet hm?’ he asks, you whimper nodding your head.

‘have i cracked the code, sweetheart?’ Eddie grins, you make a confused face which is cut short when he slams into you.

Your face is contorted immediately, pleasure and pain thrown at you all at once. Steve eyes are burning a hole into you. He can’t look away, you are so beautiful.

Your mouth is shut, you can’t bring out coherent words. You try and pull Eddie down to you, wanting him closer than what he already was.

You couldn’t get enough of him, never in your life have you felt this way during sex. It was a whole new experience.

‘Fuck sweetheart, you’re swallowing me’ he says lips now close to you ear, as he kisses down your neck.

‘move.’ you whine pushing down your hips, your eyes glossed over. When he slowly pulled out, and then back in again you choked on a moan.

You didn’t understand what was happening, you were consumed by his smell. And hypnotized by the way he was making you feel.

He gave you a slow pace, and he knew what he was doing. Sooner or later you would burst, showing exactly what you were wanting and what was on your mind.

Steve moved over to get a better look, hand now helping him get off. Your eyes wandered over to Steve, and he looked so pretty. You hear Eddie chuckle, making you look back to him. He’s looking at Steve.

‘She really likes that view, she nearly crushed me with how hard she clamped down on me.’ he says, knowing how embarrassed it would make you feel. And sure enough, your cheeks were bright red.

Eddie groans when your legs wrap around him, pulling him closer. It was a sight to see for Steve, he needed to stop being soft with you because god was this truly amazing.

‘You just can’t get enough can you?’ Eddie asks, you were going to give a quick answer. But Eddie already saw it coming, and he smashed into you. Leaving you a whimpering and suby mess.

Your no longer there, eyes squeezed shut as Eddie held you and pounded into you. The repeated hit to your spot had your eyes starting to water.

‘come on baby, i can feel you sucking me up. Your so close’ he says. You cry, hands flying to his hair.

‘I- i can’t-‘ your breathless voice making Eddie smirk.

‘Can’t what?’ he asks, teasing as he lifts up your leg over his shoulder. Still making a brutal pace on you.

‘I- i don’t know’ you sob, Steve is alarmed by your sob immediately looking at you.

‘Come on honey, i know you’ve got it. You’re being so good for me, don’t you like being good for me? hm?’ he says, and you melt. Body going limb as your tears rack through you.

And you weren’t sad, you just felt so good. It was so overwhelming to the point you didn’t know what to do. Searching for purchase, you hold out a hand to Steve who immediately grabs it. You cry out the feeling in your tummy so close to pushing it out.

‘Come on sweet girl, let go. Show Stevie how much you love being controlled and fucked till you can’t breath’ he says, and you hadn’t even realized what you said.

‘Daddy’ it was a soft sob, that alerted both Steve and Eddie. Eddie looked back at Steve grinning. Steve looked like he was red in the face, like he enjoyed it all too much.

‘Daddy?’ Eddie asks smirking as he kissed you, you cry into the kiss. Nodding your head, he pulls away. Somehow making his hips snap quicker.

‘Please! feel so good’ you groan, and before you know it the feeling in your tummy snaps.

You shake and cry in pleasure, head spinning. The white noise playing in your head as your vision goes black. Your hands are holding so tight on Eddie’s arms he thinks it might leave bruises.

Eddie let’s put a string of curses, the feeling of hot pleasure rolling into your pussy. For a moment, while your head clears and your vision comes back, the room is silent. But then you realize it’s just you, because you can hear mumbles.

Your eyes focus on Eddie, who breaks out into a grin.

‘There she is!’ he says leaning down and attacking you with kisses. Your breath is starting to become steady, your heart still racing.

Steve comes in, giving you a sweet forehead kiss. And you didn’t know what to do with yourself, love coming from all angles. You just lay there, comfortable and soaking up the love.

Soon enough Steve is taking you to the bathroom. Eddie cleaning the sheets and getting knew ones, When he’s done, he joins the both of you in the shower.

Your head still felt light, so free. You didn’t understand how just sex made you feel this way. When you all got out and changed, laying in the bed.

‘I need to do it next time’ Steve says, smirking at you. Eddie grins when you blush. Steve holds onto you tightly, arms wrapped around your lower waist. Eddie’s front right up against your back. His hand laid lazily across your stomach his head above yours. Steve’s face buried in you neck.

‘i’m tired’ you whisper, voice soft with a hint of rasp.

‘Good thing we’ve all got tomorrow free, eh?’ Eddie says, you and Steve hum in agreement.

And for the first time in your life, you actually felt so comfortable and completely free. The sleep was unmatched.

[suddenlybambi]

as long as you stay here [5] ♥ kyle broflovski

pairing : kyle broflovski x reader

college AU - 18+

tags : strangers to friends to lovers, slow burn, fluff, angst, alcohol, afab reader, she/her pronouns, eventual smut

words : 2.6k

chapter 5

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a/n - hnngghhh i wasn't going to post a chapter every day because i wanted to have a backlog of chapters just in case but i love seeing y'all react to alaysh and i have 0 self control so... chapter 5 baybeee

Y/N was halfway through her 8-hour shift by the time she managed to stop for a break to check her phone again without Jay spotting her and dragging her back out to the front of the diner. Anxiety had been eating her up, wondering if Kyle had messaged her back and how he had reacted to it. She wasn’t sure if she was relieved or more nervous when she saw that she had a notification from him. Trying not to overthink it more than she already had been, which was nearly impossible as she had greatly overthought it, she opened the message.

kyle 📗 : Hey! No worries!

kyle 📗 : I completely get it. I still grab Stan’s hand to cross the road because I used to do that for my little brother 😅

Just like that, all of Y/N’s nerves that had been building up for 4 hours dissipated in an instant. Kyle didn’t think she was a complete weirdo. Or, at least, he didn’t openly say it to her, which was good enough. Most people thought of her as a little weird anyway.

y/n 💕 : thank god 😭

y/n 💕 : Wendy does that to me, but she’s an only child so she has no excuse!

y/n 💕 : really sorry for the late response, work has been chaos - I can’t wait to get out of here

Y/N didn’t expect Kyle to respond instantly, but she was happy he did, as it gave her something to do on her 5-minute break besides scroll Twitter until she got annoyed at some piss-poor take and close it again, only to open it a second later and repeat the process.

kyle 📗 : What time do you finish?

y/n 💕 : not until 10pm so I have another 4 hours

kyle 📗 : Is Bebe going to pick you up?

y/n 💕 : nah, I usually walk it - its only 20 minutes

y/n 💕 : or I get an Uber if its raining but I try not to do that too often as they can get pricey at that time

kyle 📗 : I don’t want to sound rude, but isn’t that area known for being a bit dangerous at night?

y/n 💕 : I guess it’s not great, but it could be worse?

y/n 💕 : only two homicides in the past year!

y/n 💕 : I have my pepper spray and a mean high-kick!

kyle 📗 : I’ll come and get you at 10pm to take you home.

kyle 📗 : to your house that is

kyle 📗 : not mine

kyle 📗 : sorry that came out wrong

kyle 📗 : You can come back to mine if you want, but I figured you’d rather go back to yours.

Y/N couldn’t stop herself from giggling at her phone as Kyle’s texts came through in the space of seconds. He texted so formally until he was panicking, and then the punctuation and capitalised letters were dropped.

y/n 💕 : that would be great, thank you, but I don’t want you staying up late on account of me

y/n 💕 : gotten this far without being the third homicide 😅

kyle 📗 : My first lecture isn’t until 11am tomorrow, so I don’t need to be up early.

kyle 📗 : I don’t usually get to sleep until late anyway.

y/n 💕 : I have to get back to serving customers before my boss catches me

y/n 💕 : thank you so much, I really owe you one! I’ll see you later

The rest of Y/N’s shift seemed to pass by a lot faster than the first half, aside from one incident with a very disgruntled man who had to eventually be kicked out by Doris.

“I’ll finish cleaning that, hun,” Doris grabbed the cloth from Y/N’s hands and pointed over at the window. “Your boyfriend is outside waiting for you. Has been for five minutes.” Y/N’s head perked up as she saw Kyle’s car.

“He’s not my-” She started to protest, but Doris waved her hands dismissively.

“Yeah, yeah!” She scoffed, gently pushing Y/N towards the breakroom so she could grab her bag. “Jay packed up two lots of food for you earlier. Don’t forget to grab it on your way out.”

“How did you know he’d be picking me up?” Y/N asked once she had grabbed her bag and the two take-out boxes full of fries.

“You’ve had that dopey smile on your face all evening,” Doris shook her head as though it were perfectly obvious. “Don’t keep him waiting then.” She quite literally pushed Y/N out of the door, locking it behind her so she couldn’t get back in and complain about it. With a roll of her eyes, she made her way over to where Kyle was leaning against his car, looking at his phone.

“Hey, stranger,” She laughed, catching his attention. He looked up and smiled as he saw her. The flickering light that barely illuminated the car park caused his red hair to almost glow. “Long time no see!”

“You’ve changed so much, I almost didn’t recognise you!” Kyle played along with the joke, opening the door for Y/N. She was warmed by the polite action.

“Ah, yes,” She chuckled once he’d gotten into the driver’s seat. “That would be the grease, sweat, and humidity causing my hair to defy gravity.” 

“Ha! Mine doesn’t need any of that!” Kyle gestured at his curly red hair, running a hand through it to make it stick up. Y/N watched as it stuck in the same position when he moved his hand away. “What have you got?” He nodded over at the two boxes of take-out in her hands while trying to smooth his hair back into a presentable shape.

“What have we got?” She corrected, passing him one of the boxes. “Probably just fries. Nowhere near as good as the ones from the place Kenny works, but they hit the spot after being on your feet for 8 hours,” She opened her box to confirm that, yes, it was just full of fries. “You don’t have to eat them if you don’t want them. Doris insisted on me bringing them for you.”

“And here I was thinking you had done it out of the kindness of your heart,” Kyle teased, his smile betraying his seriousness. “I’m actually starving. I forgot to stop to eat after taking Stan and Wendy home. I just shut myself in my room all evening so they couldn’t complain to me about how hungover they were and ask me to do things for them.”

“Cheers!” Y/N held up one of the fries, Kyle did the same, and they tapped them together, eating them in unison.

“Oh… wow…” He looked down at the box of fries, eating a couple more. “These are…”

“Terrible, right?” She laughed, eating her own at an alarming rate.

“Yeah… Why can’t I stop eating them?”

“Because they are the best worst fries you’ll ever have!”

“So, how was work?” Kyle asked.

“It was pretty average,” Y/N shrugged. “Except for this one asshole of a customer.”

“What happened?”

“Okay, so,” She shuffled to get herself comfortable before she started giving the rundown of the situation. “I asked him what he wanted, and he said ‘egg’. That’s it, nothing else, just ‘egg’. So I was like, cool, sure, how do you want your egg? And he said ‘normal’.”

“What the hell does that mean?”

“Exactly! So obviously, I asked him what he meant by that, and he said ‘normal egg’ again, and I was trying to explain to him that just repeating the words wouldn’t make me understand them, but he kept on insisting that he just wanted ‘normal egg with absolutely nothing else’.”

“So what did you do?”

“I went to the kitchen and got an uncooked egg and just placed it in front of him.”

“How did he react?”

“He lost it! Doris wanted to kick him out there and then, but I couldn’t let him leave without knowing what the fuck ‘normal egg’ was to him. I was asking him to describe it, and he just kept on repeating that he wanted ‘normal egg’ until, eventually, he pointed at another guy’s plate and said that, obviously, that’s what he meant. Guess what he wanted.”

“Oh no… what did he want?”

“An omelette! You know, that thing where the egg is just one part of it, and you add a bunch of other shit to it? And he looked at me like I was stupid because I didn’t understand that a ‘normal egg with absolutely nothing else’ clearly meant that he wanted an omelette with ham, chicken, cheese, and pepper!”

“Did he get his omelette in the end?” Kyle was laughing as the story went on, seeming to be genuinely interested in it. It made a nice change from when Bebe would pretend to listen to Y/N’s work stories so she could have a turn talking about what she did in her day. 

“Made him wait 20 minutes thinking he’ll get his stupid ‘normal egg’ until Doris kicked him out,” Y/N snorted at the memory of how furious the man looked, announcing he would be leaving a terrible review of the place. “I’m just glad he didn’t wait to jump me outside after my shift.”

“Has that ever happened?” Kyle’s smile dropped in a split second, suddenly incredibly concerned. “Has someone tried to attack you after work?”

“Once!” She admitted. “But it was just some scrawny drunk asshole who could barely stand, let alone throw a punch. He fell over after one swing, and I kicked him in the balls for good measure.”

“Send me your work schedule,” He requested, tapping his phone, which had been resting on the dashboard.

“Why?” Y/N laughed softly. “What are you going to do? Are you gonna escort me to and from work each shift to make sure I stay out of trouble?”

“Yes,” She had been joking, but Kyle seemed very serious.

“It’s not a big deal, really,” She sighed. “I’ve been working this job since I moved here. Incidents like that are few and far between.”

“If you won’t tell me, I’ll just ask Bebe and Wendy for it,” He shrugged. “You shouldn’t have to risk being jumped by a pissed-off customer while walking home late at night.” Y/N could sense that she wasn’t going to win this fight.

“Yes, sir,” She sighed dramatically, not noticing how red Kyle’s face turned at the title. She patted his thigh. “Come on, are you gonna take me home, or were you planning on sitting in your car together all night?”

Sitting in her lecture with nothing but pure fury in her eyes, Y/N pulled her phone out and opened up her messages.

y/n 💕 : did you forget that I sit behind you?

y/n 💕 : those chips have a label with my name on it

y/n 💕 : this is an english class and you can’t even read

y/n 💕 : explain yourself

clyde �� : i thought the label was a joke lol 😅

y/n 💕 : you’re the fucking joke here

clyde 🕹 : i’ll buy you some more chill out 🙄

y/n 💕 : this is strike two

clyde 🕹 : what?

clyde 🕹 : what was strike 1?

y/n 💕 : walking around the apartment naked

y/n 💕 : which you have done four times so you’re lucky I’m only counting it as one

clyde 🕹 : do you want the chips back?

y/n 💕 : after your grubby hands have been in the packet rubbing against them?

y/n 💕 : hard pass dude

Clyde turned his head to look at Y/N as she sat behind him in the lecture. She flipped him the middle finger, and he rolled his eyes. Over the two and a half weeks that Clyde had been living in the apartment, the two had developed a relationship akin to siblings, where they would bicker one second, and then it was like everything was fine, and they had never argued the next. Y/N had even surprised herself by willingly spending time with him on multiple occasions when she didn’t have to. 

“Are we getting food after this?” Y/N bent down to ask him as their lecture finished and the other students started to pack up.

“You won’t take the chips because my hands have touched them, but you still expect me to drive you around?” Clyde scoffed at her, leaning back in his seat so his head rested against the back of the desk Y/N had been working on. “Don’t you have a shift at the diner?” 

“Shitttt,” She groaned, closing her eyes in disappointment. “Can you drop me off at home, please? I don’t have my uniform.”

“Sorry, babe, I’ve got plans with Craig, Tweek, and Tolkien,” He shrugged, giving her a half-hearted empathetic smile. Y/N had gotten to know the other people from South Park during Clyde’s stay at the apartment. She got along with them decently well, but no one compared to how close she had become with Kyle. They studied together almost every day, and he had insisted on following through with his plans to take her to and from work on days when she didn’t have any other transport so she wouldn’t have to walk it.

“Gross, never call me babe again.”

“But Bebe calls you babe?”

“I like Bebe.”

“Wow, I’m definitely not giving you a ride now.”

“You weren’t going to anyway, dickwad!” Y/N was distracted when her phone buzzed in her pocket. Clyde took this as an opportunity to escape while she wasn’t looking, but she threw up another middle finger as she caught him slinking away from the corner of her eye.

kyle 📗 : Do you need a ride today?

y/n 💕 : your timing is perfect as always! 🥰

y/n 💕 : yes please! I completely forgot I had work today so I need to grab my uniform from home if thats okay with you?

kyle 📗 : Of course 😊

kyle 📗 : Be there in two minutes, I’m just around the corner.

True to his word, Kyle was there within two minutes, almost exactly on the dot. Y/N felt guilty about how much he had been driving her around in the two and a half weeks that they had known one another, but he was always the one to offer.

“Before I forget, your apron is in the trunk,” Kyle gestured behind him while Y/N climbed into the passenger’s seat. “You left it in here the other day. I managed to get that one stain out.”

“You cleaned it for me?” She grinned at him, securing her seatbelt. “That stain has been there for a month. How did you get it out?” The stain had come from a customer knocking a bottle of ketchup over and accidentally dropping their bag on it; it splattered everywhere. Jay had to get it off the ceiling. She didn’t know what was in the ketchup, but it looked like watered-down blood splattered on her apron after scrubbing it for an hour straight.

“My mom used to make me help with the washing whenever I was in trouble,” He chuckled a little uncomfortably. “I was in trouble a lot, so I got really good at it.”

“Wow! What a little rebel! Who knew?” She teased, drumming her fingers against the dashboard as Kyle started driving. 

“Yeah, well, the guys would always drag me into their schemes. Someone had to be the voice of reason.”

“You’ll have to teach me your cleaning secrets. I have some shirts with some pesky stains that I haven’t been able to get out with anything.”

“Bring them to me, and I’ll sort them,” Kyle smiled as he caught a glimpse of Y/N’s grin out of the corner of his eye. It had been so easy to grow attached to her. He couldn’t remember what he did all day without her. 

a/n - let me know if you would like to be on the taglist for this fic

current taglist - @n0tangeliccc @solana-central @charqing-qing @eiizabeth-torres @hand-writxen @audiliah @cosmicbroenies @himoutolikesjojo

[ravenzeppeli]

Claimed

Chapter 32 - 5 Month Mark to Forever |La Squadra x Reader|

Warning: strong language, threats. MA.

Ghiaccio's POV

Ghiaccio assumed that he would just be picking you up and taking you to his place this Saturday, his hand gripping your bag as he stood by the door, his eyes on his capo, Risotto. "What is it?" His eyes darted over to you, a small smirk on your lips as you kept your eyes on Risotto. Something weird definitely was going on, considering how pleased you looked.

"Risotto has amazing news," you said, your voice smooth, almost giddy. "He was waiting to say it. It's just a quick something before we go." Your eyes suddenly landed on Melone, who was watching you carefully in his seat right by Risottos.

Melone wore a confused expression on his face, his thin eyebrows pulled into a low scowl as he studied your face, attempting to read you. "What's the news, boss?" He muttered to Risotto, keeping his eyes on your face.

Prosciutto and Formaggio sat next to Melone, Illuso, and Pesci being sat across. Everyone seemed to be here despite it being Saturday morning. Did Risotto call everyone here? Now Ghiaccio was starting to grow worried.

"I'll allow you to say it," Risotto muttered as he leaned back in his chair, red eyes scanning the room. "Go on and tell them. The decision is final regardless."

"Oh God, what is it?" Pesci questioned, panic filling his wide eyes. "Are you pregnant?"

Illuso let out a laugh, a wide grin appearing on his lips. "It ain't mine, so I'm good. I'm sure I'll be a good uncle and stepfather."

"She's not pregnant," snapped Prosciutto, giving Pesci and Illuso a glare. "She's on the pill."

You rolled your eyes, stepping forward, leaving Ghiaccio to stand by the front door all by himself. Goddamnit, he just wanted to take you to his home and celebrate these past five months with you. Sharing you with six other men was was fucking annoying. He'd rather just share you with Melone and Pesci only.

"So, who's going to start taking me on side missions with them?" You questioned, causing the room to fall silent. "Because I got approved. I can go with you all to beat people up. I will now be throwing the punches."

"You will be in the car and following behind," added in Risotto, raising his eyebrows at you. "Stop saying you're going to throw punches. I'll take the deal off the table and put you back on computers permanently."

"She did knock Formaggio out cold before," Illuso added in, his eyes scanning you up and down, a grin creeping on his lips. "I'll take you. You can join me when I go, and when Formaggio and I go, then so can you."

Ghiaccio blinked, sitting down your bag by the door, unable to process what was going on. From his understanding, you were their girlfriend, and despite the fact that you had a stand, you were going to stay working behind the scenes. Because you were their girlfriend. Girlfriend meaning that you needed to be fucking protected and away from the violence of their job. Goddamnit, why was Risotto suddenly allowing you to tag along? He didn't like this one bit. This would put you in danger.

Formaggio scoffed, "I let her knock me out. Fuck it, we'll start taking her with us. She can tag along and stand behind us." He shrugged, letting his eyes land on you. "You gotta listen to us."

"This is complete bullshit," spat out Prosciutto, his hands balling into fists. "She literally runs away when I punish her. She can't handle what we do."

"I only left because I can't punch you in your fucking face like I want," you replied calmly, a huff escaping Ghiaccio's lips as Prosciuttos head snapped towards you. "Next time I'm going to punch you." Goddammit, you just couldn't help yourself. Saying things like this to Prosciutto was a bad idea, and despite that you still mouthed off to him.

As Prosciutto went to stand, Risotto stopped him, his arm extending as he pushed Prosciutto back down onto the leather. "Both of you stop it," snapped Risotto, his voice growing dark. "You two need to fucking get along. No more fighting. We are supposed to be a fucking family. Act like it."

The authority in Risottos' voice caused you and Prosciutto to back down, the two of you looking away to stare at the ground. You and Prosciutto seemed destined to never get along, never being able to surpass a week without an argument breaking out. Ghiaccio felt bad, seeing you having to force a relationship that you didn't want. Did you even want him? He wasn't that much of a jack ass. He felt as if he treated you fairly well.

"She could get hurt," Melone muttered, eyes darkening as he stared at the ground. "Does she even know how to shoot a gun?"

"She can shoot a gun," Pesci blurted out, causing your mouth to slightly hang open, forming a perfect 'o' as you stared at him with disbelief. "Uh.. I mean. I think she can." He went to quickly get up, only to be stopped by Melone leaning forward, placing his hand on his leg. "I'm sorry, Y/N!" He covered his face with his hands, clearly hiding something.

Aside from Pesci, who was hiding his face, you had six pairs of eyes on you. Even Ghiaccio glared at you, wondering what in the fuck you could possibly be hiding. Well, you had a life before them, clearly you knew how to shoot a gun. Perhaps Luca taught you.

"Did you really think that Pesci put like, three bullets in that guy?" You spoke suddenly, causing a quick laugh to immediately escape Formaggios lips. "He always shoots twice, and he always shoots in the head."

How did you know how Pesci fucking shot people!? Ghiaccio shared no parts of his work life with you, despite you knowing and being active he didn't feel comfortable sharing his criminal activities with his girlfriend. He did not want to fucking scare you, he was so scared of you fearing him. All along it turns out, you really weren't scared of them. You weren't fucking scared of their crimes. In fact, it seemed like you wanted to be involved.

Why? He couldn't understand why you wanted to be involved, why you wanted to get your hands stained red just as theirs were. The men were fine with you working from home. All seven of the men were fine with providing for you and letting you presume any little hobby you had. Couldn't you learn how to bake or sew? For fucks sake, couldn't you take up fencing? Protesting would be pointless, it was clear the decision had already been made. Did Risotto want you to get killed? This was beyond fucked up.

"Are you going to punish her?" Prosciutto questioned, voice low as he turned towards Risotto. "She just admitted to killing someone without telling us. She probably forced Pesci into lying as well."

"I did not force him," you added in, "I begged." Illuso let out a sigh, shaking his head at you as he put his finger to his lips, indicating that maybe you needed to shut up. Melone and Prosciutto seemed very pissed off. They weren't keeping quiet about it like Ghiaccio was.

"The only reason I took her was because she shot two men dead in front of me. Her stand also stitched up my head that was busted open," Risotto spoke, his eyes on Prosciutto. "She can ride along with Illuso and Formaggio. She isn't riding along with you, so it isn't any of your concerns. My decision is final."

"Why?" Melone muttered. "Why are you doing this to us? I fucking love her Risotto! If she fucking dies out their then so help me God I will die too!" He snapped, causing you to snap your head towards him.

"Hey, stop being dramatic!" You snapped back at him, squinting your eyes at him. "If you do that, then I'll have to come back to life and die again."

Pesci suddenly raised his head, his eyes landing on you. A look of pure confusion was spread across his face as he stared at you. "What does that even mean!? You aren't making any sense!" He spoke in a panic, his words slightly jumbled. "I-I, goddammit! She didn't force me to lie! She just.. she.. she didn't get hurt! She knows how to kill!"

Ghiaccio wanted to speak up and side with Prosciutto, especially considering he wasn't on board with this. Today marks five months of you being on the team, and tonight, he planned on seeing if you wanted to take that final step. Aside from Melone giving him a few blowjobs and him pleasuring himself, he hadn't had sex in seven years. He was fucking nervous, and he wasn't going to fuck that up by siding with Prosciutto right in front of you.

"I'll be fine," you replied, brushing Pesci off with a simple shoulder shrug, causing him to just stare at you with a frantic look in his eyes. "You all should worry less. It's so annoying. How about you instead find a reason to be happy about this?" You just.. you weren't like anyone he's ever fucking met. You were.. something else, for fucks sake.

"Girl, you aren't helping your case," Formaggio snapped lightly at you, keeping his voice filled with an ounce of sweetness. "Illuso and I will train her and take good care of her."

Melone scoffed, his glare setting on Formaggio. "You and Illuso take terrible care of her. You'll get her killed!" Suddenly, his eyes set on you. "You'll come with Ghiaccio and I."

Before Ghiaccio could make a statement, you stepped forward. "I would much prefer Illuso and Formaggio."

"Are you fucking serious?" He questioned, his hands balling into tight fists. "Are you seriously going against me? I said you're teaming with Ghiaccio and I."

Pesci went to speak, but Illuso lightly smacked his arm, shaking his head. "Nah, Pesci, we can't get involved if these two fight," he heard Illuso whisper to Pesci. "We gotta stay the fuck out of this."

Ghiaccio silently agreed, stepping back slightly, keeping his eyes warily on Melone in case he did decide to hurt you. He wouldn't let you get hurt, but would Melone ever dare to hurt you? No, he was possessive and clingy, but in no way was he abusive towards you.

"I actually want to learn something. You'll hold me back. Illuso and Formaggio will actually train me," you replied, causing Melones jaw to instantly lock. Oh fuck, why in the hell did you fucking insult him like that? Ghiaccio wanted to put a muzzle over your goddamn mouth! "Look at the time, hm? Looks like I gotta go." You turned away, walking towards the front door.

"Melone isn't done speaking to you, girl," Prosciutto snapped, his glare resting on Risotto. "Can we please privately discuss this in your office?"

Risotto nodded once, "it won't change my decision." He stood up, giving you once last glance before he turned away, walking down the hallway. He had no footsteps. His steps were always so silent. Prosciutto followed, deciding to keep his eyes off of you, heavy footsteps stomping down the hall.

The sudden slam of Risottos office door caused Pesci to jump slightly, a shaky sigh escaping his lips. Despite the room being two less, the tension was still extremely thick, causing Ghiaccio to just want to grab you and leave.

"Nag nag nag," you muttered under your breath as you walked across the wooden floor, the door now inches away from your grasp.

Melone let out a low laugh, shaking his head. His laugh was unsettling, causing Ghiaccio to shift uncomfortably by the door. Goddamnit, why did he always act so fucking creepy? "That's fine.. it's fine to not listen to me. I'll see you Monday, I love you." The whites of his knuckles were showing, his teeth clinching together.

The look on your face was one of panic, only Ghiaccio being able to see your face. Ever so slightly, his head tilted to the side as he watched the panic leave your face as you turned around, you forcing your face to go blank. Hm.. did Melone scare you? He should watch the two of you more. "Well, I can go with you some days." Formaggio snorted, causing you to glare at him.

"What?" He questioned, a grin appearing on his lips. "Don't be spineless. Are you going to let Melone walk all over you? Looks like you are our little girl, hm?" The words were harmless child's play, just Formaggio joking around with you as he always does, but it was clear his words pissed you off.

"Fuck you and Melone," you snapped suddenly, Melone instantly standing up. "I am in control of myself!"

Melone walked towards you slowly, his hands unballing, fingers slightly tucked in as he made his way towards you. "What is your fucking problem today? You don't act like this. This isn't how you act." As he stepped over to you, he got in your face, leaning down to meet you eye length. "Did I do something to you? Do I deserve your disrespect?"

"Do I deserve to be treated like a child?" You questioned back, staring up at him. The stiffness in your body was straight as a board, your eyes hard but close to breaking. When it came to defending yourself against the men, you did a good job, but Ghiaccio's never seen you have to defend yourself against Melone. Usually, he was doing whatever he could to please you, not getting in your face and expressing his disappointment with you.

"I see how you wanna be," muttered Melone, shaking his head. "You hate me for wanting to protect you? Fine. I'll just give you space. Since you fucking hate me all of a sudden. I guess I'm not strong enough to train you. I guess I'm not man enough for you." Despite the calmness in his voice, he could sense a deep anger behind each of his words.

"Melone, it isn't like -" you began, only to be cut off by the sound of him walking out the door, slamming the door shut behind him. You let out a huff, turning your attention towards Formaggio. "I didn't really mean fuck you."

"Nah, you're gonna fuck me," Formaggio replied, your eyes squinting as you crossed your arms over your chest. "Wait. No, I'm gonna fuck you. You don't get to do the fucking around here little lady."

Illuso snickered, smacking Pescis thigh. "Hey Pesci, do you fuck Y/N or does Y/N fuck you? Does she ride you?"

"Leave him alone," you snapped, shaking your head as you turned your attention towards Illuso. "He doesn't want to talk about sex. Talk to him about boats, not sex!"

Formaggio scoffed, followed up by an eye roll from Illuso. Ghiaccio was ready to fucking go, having to sit back here in silence as he always does grows very annoying. The men have no respect for his relationship with you due to the fact that he hasn't slept with you yet. Aside from Melone and Pesci, the other men would ignore him or brush them off when it came to matters concerning you. All that was about to change tonight.

"You're in trouble," Illuso spoke, a grin appearing on his lips. "He's never gotten onto you like that before. Looks like you might be getting in trouble when you see Melone again."

Ghiaccio almost wanted to laugh at how ridiculous that sounded. Despite Melone being very angry with you, he loved you too much to ever lay his hands on you. The most prized possession in Melones life was you. He wouldn't dare lay an improper hand on you. He just rolled his eyes, leaning down to pick back up your bag off the ground.

"Let's go Y/N," Ghiaccio snapped, grabbing the doorknob, yanking the front door open. "What's done is done. It can be discussed on Monday! We're all off this weekend so let's be fucking off!" The fact that they're still standing here annoyed him, he was ready to have you to himself.

"Bye guys," you muttered, walking out the front door, Ghiaccio following behind you. The nervousness he felt over tonight as well as the entirety of this weekend engulfed him, silence falling over him as he opened his passenger seat for you, guiding you into his car.

Fuck.. he hoped that he could please you. That he could make you cum and possibly lay on his chest afterwards so he could caress your cheek as you fell asleep in his arms. All he wanted was for you to like him suddenly, and he couldn't believe that. He couldn't believe that he was finding himself falling in love again. Goddamnit, this was so fucking terrifying. He waa really starting to want this to work so badly.

[neverbelessthan]

15 QUESTIONS FOR 15 FRIENDS

I was tagged by @adickaboutspoons and @edsrosetattoo. Thank you for thinking of me! ❤️❤️❤️ I love this shit. And sorry for taking so long to do it, I had so. much. uni. work.

Are you named after anyone?

Katharine Hepburn. And my mother gave me her middle name ('her' as in my mother's, not 'her' as in Hepburn's - although, Houghton? What a bitchin' middle name jfc), which has pissed my sister off literally from the day I was born because she got given a(n arguably lovely) random middle name instead. Suck it.

When was the last time you cried?

Today.

Do you have kids?

Yep.

What sports do you play/have you played?

I’m an equestrian (dressage, specifically) although I’ve been out of it for a while because I had to have some surgeries, also because I’m broke, and horseriding is basically like burning money. Also figure skating. Group sports are the devil.

Do you use sarcasm?

I honestly wouldn’t know how to get through life without sarcasm. I’m like, 75% sarcasm (in person, at least - online I tend to be a bit more sincere because I generally obsessively re-read anything I post or comment before letting it loose in the world and if it comes off too sarcastic in my own head I’m like dude … stop being a dick).

What is the first thing you notice about people?

I’m hyper-sensitive, and I have acute sensory-sensitivity issues, so generally I pick up on the minutia of how someone presents at any given time (sometimes because it’s all my brain can take in, because wider general observations are too much), like I’ll pick up on shit people aren’t even aware that they’re putting down. Ask me how much fun I am at parties.

What’s your eye colour?

Brown. Very much towards the uniform brown/black end of the spectrum though, not hazel.

Scary movies or happy endings?

Neither.

Any talents?

I’m weirdly excellent at claw machines? Someone pointed out to me the other day that I’ll need to budget half a suitcase and a not-insignificant amount of my travel budget to The Claw Machines because Japan is full of them, and it honestly hadn’t even occurred to me. And by ‘weirdly excellent’ I mean weirdly excellent - like I can’t remember ever having started on one and not ended with a sizeable audience. I recently had a worker at one stop me mid-game to open the box and reshuffle the toys and then watch over my shoulder because he thought I was cheating. I’m also really good at mimicking people’s handwriting. I don’t have a gag reflex. I have full-body hyperextension, so I can do weird/terrifying joint-related things. Are we supposed to be picking weird stuff? I do have normal talents but they’re boring.

Where were you born?

Sydney, Australia.

What are your hobbies?

Sculpture, photography, crochet, knitting. I like small-scale art - miniatures, origami. Music (I play the piano, cello, guitar, and sing). I like plants (hoyas, particularly). Is travelling a hobby (my brain would like me to accept that no, it’s a coping mechanism for escaping the nihilistic futility of existence :)? I’m doing two university degrees right now, so I find that my hobbies don’t get much bandwidth and when I’m not reading about neuroscience or philosophy I’m usually just staring into the middle distance letting my brain power down for 5 minutes. Is that a hobby?

Do you have any pets?

I have a cat. And some tropical fish. And a semi-domesticated water dragon named Richard.

How tall are you?

5’2”. Or, as people often enjoy pointing out: pocket-sized.

Favourite subject in school?

I hated my school, and therefore generally hated all subjects by extension. I loved anything creative: art, music, drama, creative writing, but I was too much of a social weirdo to not get bullied about it all, so I stopped bothering because I wasn’t willing to make/do what I really wanted to because I was too terrified of getting shat on about it, and there didn’t seem much point in doing any of it halfway. Plus it was an academically selective smartypants-assface school, so they didn’t put much stock in anything creative, unless you could top the state in it, and I didn’t really want that sort of pressure, thanks.

Dream job?

Some sort of very well paid, very infrequently required consultant.

I tag, with absolutely no pressure at all (and with profuse apologies to anyone who hates these things or who has already done it and i somehow missed you doing it because i’ve been buried under research and only on here sporadically the past week): @jessystardust, @majesticartax, @follows-the-bees, @theangelyouknew, @iamadequate1, @jeffsinnbythesea, @tositandadmire, @ameryth74, and literally any other mutuals who I haven’t tagged and who haven’t done it that would like to do it. I get such insane social anxiety about participating in these things, but also I love them: The Horrors. Also I know that I didn't tag 15 people, but … anxiety (I've tried to not include people who I've already seen tagged, and have literally gone through the last 50 or so posts of the people I have tagged to try and make sure they haven’t already done it, because i’m an idiot, and you know, being an idiot like that takes time).

[towriteloveontheirarms]

Can you please do a Rowan x reader in which Reader is fem, and has the ability to see ghosts? Like everyday people see her talking to nothing but she's just talking to ghosts, and talks to Rowan's ghost who is still convinced Wednesday needs to be killed and asks reader to do it because she's the only one who can see him, and reader is kinda snarky cuz she actually is friends (kinda) with Enid and Wednesday?

No rush, love ur work! 💖💖

This is a little shorter than I wanted it to be, but my last posts haven´t been showing up in the tags which is making me kinda depressed. I still hope this reaches you and you can enjoy <3

Talking to Ghosts

pairing: Rowan Laslow x fem!reader

warnings: none

word count: 0.6k

Being able to commune with the dead and doing so on a daily basis was nothing that made you popular. At least that was what you learned. Looked at weirdly or just getting looked down upon by your peers ever since your early days at Nevermore academy you had a hard time fitting in. There was only one person who’s interest got sparked. Watching you talk to seemingly thin air from a save distance. Not daring to interrupt your conversations. It wasn´t an easy power to bear, but after years of mastering it and even making acquaintances with one student or the other you thought you had it all under control. Most of the ghosts were just glad to be seen and left you alone anyway. Until the arrival of Wednesday Addams at the school added one more ghost to talk to. You had never talked much to Rowan when he was alive, with both of you not being the most outgoing of personalities. Towards the end of it some might even had noticed the very obvious feelings you held for each other, if they would have cared enough.

His death added so much to how you were treated before already. He didn´t look at you like the others did. He understood how it felt to be treated so unkindly by people who were supposed to understand what it was like to be different. The both of you saw how even the people closer to you looked at you sometimes. Not maliciously, but weirded out nonetheless. You weren´t mad at them for it. You understood, but something in Rowan changed shortly before Wednesday arrived at the academy.

The ghosts of past students had warned you about the girl the day she arrived and the way Rowan started acting before should have reinforced the want to stay away form her. For some reason you listened to Enid and Xavier enough to be at least neutral about her.

Rowans death followed soon after and it made everything so much worse. People looked at you even weirder now, Teachers approached you wanting to talk, when they saw you arguing with what seemed like yourself on the daily. The only times you truly were left alone by Rowan anymore, when you were getting high with Ajax and Xavier. More often than not though he spend his time following you around. Pointing out everything that didn´t add up about her, talking about his mothers prediction. Trying to convince you he was right in what he tried to do and that it still needed to be done. You tried to be understanding of his situation, because it seemed like it was hard for him to understand what he was now. Tried to. When he asked you to do it, you finally snapped.

“Rowan stop!”, you ignored the looks of everyone in the quad. “I understand why this means so much to you. I get that your mother was very powerful and I saw you a friend, but this goes too far.”

“I…”, you didn´t give him a chance to even start the sentence.

“No. I´m sure it must be hard to hard to wrap your head around everything that happened and sure Wednesday may not be my friend exactly, but Enid is. One of my only friends now too and she trusts Wednesday. So I am not gonna destroy that or get myself into god knows what else kind of trouble. I´m sorry.”

You knew your words were harsh, but they needed to be said. He leaves you alone for a while after that. Avoiding to talk to you until after the fight with Crackstone. Once you do see each other again, he apologized for what he had asked of you.

[madaboutmunson]

Cryptic Cupid - Part 6 (Eddie's POV)

Part 1 | Part 5 | Part 7

Sequel to Raspberry Riddle So this is set in a government-operated hospital after the events of season 4 but everyone is alive.

Each part has a different POV, Robin, Steve, or Eddie.

Tag List: @marivictal

Apologies for the delay in posting fic updates, some not good stuff happened and I couldn't write for a while

+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

Eddie pockets the paper, waits until he hears the other door close, and then opens his own for the psychologist, who takes her regular seat. She clicks her pen, Eddie’s brain registers it as a starting gunshot, and he begins pacing backwards and forwards in front of her, looking between her and where he is walking intermittently.

“Did you hear about this morning? I think he’s trying to kill me, man.” Eddie says in desperation, “You gotta help me.”

"By he, you mean…."

"Who-who do I mean?" Eddie says in disbelief and gestures wildly at his now closed door to the hallway, which is still being swamped with pop music, but the Psychologist simply looks over the rims of her glasses at him, making him sigh and sit down, "Steve, my only fucking neighbour, that's who I mean." He says in a much calmer, resigned tone.

"You feel that Steve is a threat to you?" She says very seriously, looking at Eddie intently.

"A threat?! To my life? Undetermined. To heterosexuality? Yes!" Eddie runs a ringed hand down the side of his face, exasperated, "If the clothes clinging onto him within a thread of their existence were not enough. He is shimmering. Or extra shiny or something. Guys don't naturally glisten, ok?! He's doing this on purpose, and-and that smell when I opened the door. What even was that ok? Some weird pheromone potion thing?"

"Why would Steve do those things on purpose, do you think?" She says, scribbling away on her pad. Eddie bets she's just fucking doodling because she's already written off Eddie as insane, and honestly, he wouldn't blame her. He felt insane. One minute he's into Steve and wants him as close as possible the next, he wants nothing to do with him, to never speak to him again, remove him from Eddie's reality.

"Well, I don't know, do I? I don't know what to compel a guy to slather himself in some ungodly lotion…to make his muscles look bigger or more defined, maybe? I don't fucking know," he says with a groan as he kicks his legs over the arm of the chair.

"Well, let's start there, then. What benefit would Steve have in making his muscles appear bigger and more defined?" 

Eddie reclines over the back of the other arm of the chair, so he almost looks like a letter 'm' draped over it, pinching the bridge of his nose, "So people look at him more, I guess?"

"Did you look at him more because of it?" She says, crossing one leg over the other like Steve does when he knows he’s right about something. Oh, gods! Stop thinking about that prick. Nope, especially not that, do not think about his prick. NO! NO! Ok. La-la-la-la. Eddie quickly sits up in his chair again with a huff and rubs his face with his hands.

“Yes, regretfully, I did look at him more because of it, but it wasn't on purpose, you know?” He laughs awkwardly, looking at the psychologist, “It was a lot like I couldn't help it. Like my eyes kept going back there, and I didn't want them to, right? No way!” Eddie says, waving his hand in front of him.

“Ok, let's talk about that. Do you feel out of control of yourself, Eddie?” She asks, flipping a page of her notebook, making Eddie's eyes dart towards it.

“I’m not sure what you're getting at”, Eddie says nervously. The last thing he wants is to be sent to Pennhurst on top of everything else. He didn't feel like anything else was controlling him. He just wished he didn't have the longing for Steve that he did. The kind that feels like a demonic hand reaching into your body, pulling at your insides like a visceral web of puppet strings, Whilst Crazy On You by Heart plays in the background. Dragging you into the gravitational pull of the only celestial body that your brain will permit you to think about, despite your kicking and screaming because you know all this can result in is doom and heartbreak. And in this case, that neutron star was Steve Fucking Harrington.

“You say you didn't want your eyes to look at Steve, but they did. That sounded to me like perhaps you felt out of control. Am I wrong in that assumption? You can be honest here, Eddie.” She gives him a small smile of reassurance. Eddie is at odds with himself with what he wants to say. Of course, he could lie, but then what is even the point of this shrink here? If he tells the truth, he has to admit things to himself again that he felt like he’d just started to get over. Though today would indicate, apparently, he had not. At all. She flicks back and forth through the pages of her notes and looks up at Eddie again, “If you feel uncomfortable or want to talk about something else, we can. I’m taking your lead here.”

Come on, Eddie, time to put your big boy pants on. This woman can help, and she’s the only unbiased person you can talk to because everyone else seems to have fallen in love with King Fucking Steve too!

Eddie squeezes his eyes tight and screws up his face, he doesn't want to do this, but he has to figure it out. Finally, he releases and takes a deep breath, “Ok, so. I liked him, no,” he shakes his head, “I like him, in a non-platonic way. I’m usually pretty good at this, you know, having feelings for people that I know don't like me that way back. It's happened hundreds of times. I can accept that it is unrequited,  push it down, and be a bit morose about it, you know? Then bounce back and move on with my life. This ain’t my first rodeo.”  He laces his fingers together and grips his hands together tightly, “But this is different, and I don’t know if this is because it's Steve, or because we are both trapped in this place, or because I know he was pretty instrumental in saving my life. I can’t seem to get to acceptance; it keeps feeling possible. Still, after I tore into him like that…” Eddie looks out of the window for divine assistance with the next thing, as he can hear her scribbling away, and to not fall apart when he says it. “because of this.” Eddie just about keeps the crack in his voice at bay as he gestures to the scars on his face, “How could someone that fucking scintillates find someone as damaged as me attractive, let alone any feeling bigger than that? By damaged, I mean, let's face it mentally, I'm obviously fucked up, but physically speaking, I wasn't a work of art, but I had a shot at being kinda cute, I guess.” he says with a shrug.

“Is that what you are looking for? Something more than attraction?” She asks with her pen poised.

Eddie shrugs, “Yeah. But, I mean, isn’t that what everyone wants? To be loved for who they are?”

She gives him a half smile, “Let's take everyone out of the equation and let us take out what you think you should want and deserve out of it. What, in a world where anything you want is possible, would you want from a non-platonic relationship?”

Eddie folds his arms and leans back in his chair, thinking for a while, “I guess where I could be myself…Entirely!!" He emphasises loudly he didn't want to be a watered-down Eddie. The person that loved him would allow Eddie to be the weird, nerdy, loud, feral, romantic, furious, kind, disgusting, thoughtful, annoying, and tender guy he was. That's not to say they should accept it all, but that they didn't give him a hard time about it. Maybe Eddie might even balance out a little more or have the time to learn the tells when he was doing one too much. Someone that loved him enough, so he had time with them, time to learn, more than a few secret dates, or a quick affair in the woods or his van, "And so could they, and we’d still love one another, plus, you know, the other stuff” Eddie smirks shyly and then quickly tries to hide it with a cough.

She frowns at him a little, “Without knowing exactly what you mean by other stuff. Though I think I might be able to hazard a guess. The first part of what you said isn't an unreasonable request. In fact, it's actually a very healthy thing to aim for. Well, provided that the personalities in question don't hurt one another.”

Eddie sighs and runs a hand through his hair, “Yeah, well, I already did that, didn't I?” She says nothing and simply looks at Eddie, waiting. He's out of his seat again, slapping his hands on his knees as he gets up to walk around the room. "I said mean things because I thought his advances were out of pity, and if seeing my new face wasn't enough to break me, that thought sure was" he grips the back of the chair and leans over it to look directly at her, his weight shifting to his stronger leg. He knows where the next thing he says will take this conversation, right down apology avenue, then making a right onto self-hatred boulevard. "I know what I did was wrong, and I am sorry about it, but I can't bring myself to talk to him because now I know all those times he was staring at my face, it wasn't because he liked me too. It was…". Eddie feels the tears threaten to rush forth. He fights them back by shutting his eyes, biting his lips together and taking a deep breath. It was no good crying about this. It wasn't going to change his face. It wasn't going to magic away the past. All it would do was make him mad at himself for not being able to finish a sentence talking about his new permanent face feature. "It was because of these marks from those monsters". Eddie finishes looking at her intensely. Not because he has bad feelings towards her but because he is focusing on the now. He is trying to stay in the moment.

She shifts in her seat, and for a second, a look of pity flashes on her face but disappears before Eddie can call her out on it. She flicks back through her book. Her eyes scan the pages until she finds what she's looking for, "Now, by all means, we don't have to talk about this, but you mentioned in one of our early sessions about what happened at the ice cream store. That you…felt there was something there but didn't get a chance to pursue it?"

Eddie shakes his head. What didn't she understand about this, "That was before the Upside Down happened. So you know, less to be put off by then", he tries to cover it up with a laugh.

She flicks back to the present area of her notebook, "Ok, what is it about Steve that makes you think he's so superficial?"

"Er…well, that's easy", Eddie scoffs, "He was super popular at school and still kind of is. He focuses on his appearance a lot, so looks are important to him."

"Is appearance not important to you too?" She asks quickly, pulling a rushed answer from Eddie.

"No. I couldn't give a shit…I mean, other than my current problem making me feel hideous," Eddie wraps his arms around himself as she raises an eyebrow at him, "Well, ok, that's not true. I like to wear certain things and look a certain way. I guess" Before he's even decided if he's finished his sentence, she's asking another question.

"Right, so if you had come out of the upside down unscarred and Steve had the scars you had, you'd find him repulsive too, right?" She asks with no emotion, just like she was asking him what size shirt he wore or something mundane like that, but it still makes Eddie feel uncomfortable, almost sad, imagining his scars on Steve's face.

"No, of course not", Eddie volleys back, a little annoyed.

"Oh, but you'd pity him, stop liking him, but pretend you still did?" She says to him like she's stating the obvious.

"Of course, I would feel sorry for him, but he'd be alive, so ultimately...No it wouldn't matter to me," Eddie says, folding his arms and frowning.

"But it would matter to Steve, wouldn't it?" She says finally, and Eddie realises he's walked right into this one.

"Ok, ok. I get it. But I don't think you understand the difference between the two of us. Steve could have, like, anyone, you know? Everyone likes him. He's easy to get on with and normal," Eddie says with a smile.

She crosses her arms over her notebook and leans towards him, "Eddie. Do you think you are a better person than Steve? Or maybe you wouldn't be so kind and thoughtful if you were as popular as Steve?"

The question almost floors Eddie, "No. I'm not better than Steve. He's a good dude. Most popular people seem like bulldozers, you know? Take out anything in their path to get where they are going and don't care about the destruction in their wake. Steve isn't like that. He's good" Eddie goes to say something else, but the music from the hallway seeps into his room. He'd been blocking it out for most of the session, but the soft piano intro steals his words. He knows this one. His Mama used to sing it to him. Obviously, amending some of the lyrics to fit his own appearance, as she danced with him around the kitchen when his Dad was out.

Why do birds suddenly appear

Every time you are near?

Just like me, they long to be

Close to you…

Oh god, that punches him right in the gut, and he swallows hard, shaking it out of his head.

"Everything ok, Eddie?" She says, getting out of her seat to move towards him.

"Yeah, just the song got me, is all," He says, forcing a smile, "He's been playing stuff all morning."

"Do you want me to ask him to turn it down?" She asks kindly.  Eddie almost nods silently for a second so someone can finally stop Steve and this weird mission he seems to be on, but Eddie is as curious as he was impulsive, was this just a mistake or was Steve trying to say something? Eddie shakes the ridiculous idea out of his head. It's just a song that doesn't mean anything.

"No, that's…I mean, it's fine." Eddie gives a small reluctant smile, "So yeah, It's not that I think I'm better than him. I just think he's out of my league" She narrows her eyes at Eddie.

"And yet you went back every day for an ice cream that you didn't eat, pretended you needed his help to be close to him, and learned to sign to encourage him to do the same because Steve is losing his hearing?" She asks much more softly, the gentle music a backdrop to a quick flick through Eddie's fonder memories with Steve.

"I guess I was so enraptured I just went for it. Well, more like nudged to see what he'd do. I couldn't help it. When someone gets a scent of a maybe from someone they've entirely lost the plot for, they might look past all the things that would usually tell them not even to try.”

"Someone like you?" She asks, and he nods a little sadly.

"Someone like Steve?" She asks, trying to catch his eye, and Eddie straightens up and looks at the closed door between them, and instead of trying to block him out entirely for the first time in a long time, he wonders what he's doing on the other side of it. Could he? Unlikely, but what of anything they'd been through had been likely. None of it. Even his closest confidantes liked Steve. They hadn't said as much, but if Steve was trying to be mean to Eddie, the people he loved, that loved him unconditionally, his brothers in music, and his Uncle wouldn't like him. Eddie pulls the paper out of his pocket and uncurls its scrolled-up edges to read it. 

Beautiful homes and ruins (8 letters)

"What's that?" She asks, leaning forward, trying to get a better look at the paper.

Eddie gives a shrug of a smile, remembering better times, "It's a crossword clue, you know, the cryptic kind. Sometimes Steve would ask me for help with them, though I figure he already knew the answers for most of them."

"I've never understood those," She says with a sweet laugh, "Want to talk me through one?"

Eddie's smile broadens at the prospect of being helpful rather than hurtful or doing something stupid. He crouches down next to her and unfurls the paper again.

"So immediately what jumps out at me is the word ruins, which makes it likely this might be an anagram. That leaves us with the three words left over. There is no anagram of and that means beautiful homes, so there must be an anagram of homes and that means beautiful, right? So this one is…" and Eddie freezes when the answer illuminates in neon lights in his head, "it's er…um…handsome. Yeah, the answer is handsome," he says quietly as a blush races across his face.

"Oh, the way you explained it made it seem quite straightforward. Maybe I'll attempt the cryptic ones in tomorrow's paper?" She smiles kindly at Eddie, who is still staring at the paper in his hands, slowly stepping back to his chair before he slumps down into it with a thud.

"Yeah," he says softly, but his brain is being anything but gentle, rifling through his memory banks, the answer to clue the last time he sat with Steve had been adorable. Eddie wonders if these clues had never been part of his puzzles, much like his riddles had never been written on the bubblegum wrappers. Things were starting to stack in favour of maybe he did stand a chance with Steve, perhaps he'd been looking for an excuse to self-sabotage, and the shock of the scars had given him that in spades. Eddie's stomach flips as the maybe glows brightly in the distance, in the middle of a barren wasteland, where his insecurities lay in wait in the shadows that littered the path to his iridescent possibility.

His heart thumps deeply in his chest. He knows that apologising is the first step. He turns his attention back to the psychologist, "If nothing else, I'd like to apologise to Steve but, cards on the table, I am terrified of it being thrown back in my face." He says with a hard swallow, "So I guess maybe what I'm asking is what is the best way I can do that? Bearing in mind the last time I spoke to him, I was a total asshole, but I was hurting, and I know that doesn't excuse it, but under normal circumstances, I would never speak to him like that. Never." Eddie knows she sits in there with Steve, too, she has insider information, though it's all confidential, but maybe she could throw him a fucking bone here.

"Well, I would say the most important part of an apology is that it is genuine. So you aren't apologising to be forgiven, but rather apologising because you are sorry for hurting the other person. So no matter what happens, be kind, be calm, and above all else, tell the truth." Eddie gives her a smile of thanks. "Is there anything else you wanted to talk about today, Eddie?"

Eddie's eyes go to the ceiling, "Well, just in case this goes well…what are the rules around, um, fraternising with other, um, patients?"

"You know, I don't think I've read any, to be honest," She says, closing her notebook, and Eddie has to press his lips together to hide the enormous grin that almost erupted onto his face.

"Ok, great. Then yeah, I'm all done for today. Thank you," Eddie says, getting to his feet and opening the door to let her out, and as he does, he hears a new song fill his room.

You're everything I hoped for

You're everything I need

You are so beautiful

To me

He peers around the door to see the lonely boom box in the hallway but no Steve, just a closed door. He excitedly crosses the hall and presses his ear to the door in case Stevel has company, but all he hears is the sound of occasionally muffled sobs. Eddie's heart sinks at the thought of Steve crying over something he's done. A simple sorry was not going to cover this; he had to think of something grander. He turns on his heel to walk back to his room to begin brainstorming and rehearsing, but a step in that direction and the tape stops with an audible click indicating it has finished. He hears the door behind him open and immediately starts to panic, and is about to lunge towards his own door when a sequence of sounds that seems to weld him to the spot meets his ears. A soft gasp, joined with a sniffle, and finally, a frail utterance of his own name leaves Steve's mouth, "Eddie?" and even with the fear creeping up his spine, not a single atom of Eddie can leave Steve this way.

[rubberduckyrye]

hey I just wanted to thank you for the v3 cast age post. I'm a nsfw author and I've had people tell me several times I'm writing porn of minors (even if none of my works are tagged underage) going as far as calling me a pedophile and I'm SO GLAD there's a sensible person talking about it because I was too scared to put it out there

People like you are half the reason why I made that post. The other half ofc to debunk the derail that Antis were trying to start to use to enable their own ableism towards Gonta, but that's still only part of it.

People are so weird about teenagers and sex, it's unreal.

Anyway, so it turns out, the V3 cast are likely to be college students and not actually high schoolers! They're probably the oldest KG contestants, actually--if we assume it took a good few years for Kirumi to eventually he asked to run the entire country during the Crisis. I'm not going to assume the Prime Minister asked her to do that only a few months on the job, after all.

Still! Feel free to RB the post if you like. Spread it around, silence the arguments of those who only want to use "BUT THEY'RE MINORS" as a means to harass people. We're all tired of it.

Also, I recommend reading my "Fandom stop being Ableist about Gonta" post, because I'm salty.

[raviolitin]

why do you support captain charming at all if you view hook’s actions as sexual harassment???

It all comes down to the fact that the way I interact with captain charming is in the most heavily fanon way possible, my interpretation of Hook is not the same Hook as depicted in canon in any way shape or form.

Second of all, the way Hook ‘flirts’ (obviously meant to just be banter by the writers) with David doesn’t seem directly unwanted or unreciprocated to me. Emma and Snow tell him to stop multiple times, while people like Regina kind of have apathy to the whole thing and David’s reactions read more to me as him being flustered because he’s being flirted with by a man for the first time. I view is reactions more as a complicated disgust with himself because he’s letting a man and pirate flirt with him and he isn’t mad about it, but oh god he should be mad and what would everyone else think if they knew. obviously that’s very heavily fanon, but that’s my personal interpretation of how David would react to actual flirting if Hook was the one doing it.

Killian is such an odd character because I sometimes forget that he is the way he is in canon, because the Hook I write in fics and depict in edits isn’t the same person, which is common in just about every fandom space. Honestly I think Hook is the only character I don’t get mad about the mischaracterisation of, because god is he a mess.

I also think that him being with David actually gives him way more of a chance to change and grow from that. From the start, David has put his foot down about that kind of stuff. One of their first interactions is David literally physically attacking him because he flirted with Snow, and the entire time they’re on Neverland he doesn’t stop berating him for how weird his behaviour towards women is.

This means that David would never be with Hook in any way shape or form, unless Hook changed that and he stopped doing it. David’s strong morals are good for Killian in my opinion, because he can do nothing but become the best person he can under his influence.

Hook getting with Emma is annoying because, as i said, it feels like he’s being rewarded for his incessant flirting that she says she doesn’t like (even if she changed he mind on this, Killian can’t be sure she has). He gets the girl in the end, which makes me angry because it’s not like one of those stories where he stopped and THEN she realised she loves him, because throughout the whole s3 finale he’s still flirting and commenting on her body.

The fact that Hook actually hates David, unlike the way he’s always liked Emma, means almost all of his flirting is left unspoken because of both his anger towards him and the fact David’s in active danger throughout the whole neverland arc and they’re barely speaking in 3b. Killian is put in a position where flirting is very hard, which means he doesn’t do very much of it (and if we’re going with canon, he does none of it).

So, in Hook’s mind, when he does get with David, he doesn’t associate ‘getting the guy’ with harassment and flirting, but rather with heroic acts like saving David from dreamshade. As a result, he goes into his redemption arc with the mindset that flirting doesn’t work, that winning someone’s heart takes more than constantly being sexual towards them. The way I view it, that means the toxic cycle of behaviour probably won’t continue, and if it does, David would have a stern talk about it because he’s not letting Hook be that man again.

Obviously, captain charming has not and never will be canon, but this is just how i view it.

Also, I have no problem with cs shippers! Just want to clear that up, what I said is more of a problem with Killian’s development, rather than his actual relationship. Captain Swan isn’t a bad ship, but Hook is definitely a bad character, which sours the ship as a whole in my opinion. (I only tagged it as anti captain swan because I didn’t want captain swan shippers to have that clogging up their tag)

[demonsfate]

man, i love both jinxiao and jinhwoa and i've been in fandoms too long to engage in drama nowadays, but tbh it's amazing how people read/watch things with their ass because how do you say that it was Jin and not Dj (literally the demon inside him) the one who beat Hwoarang??? also some fans are very weird and annoying about the kazjun ship too like you said, idk like sometimes people have the worse takes ever and you just.. have to sigh and move on🚶‍♂️

i love them both! i believe i pointed out before that both are solid ships because both have wonderful dynamics with each other that fits well. i'd be happy if either one became canon, and either one would make sense. i try not to engage in drama, but gosh darn twitter is a hell site that just SHOWS you posts frm ppl you don't follow. so it's easier to get into arguments. i already had an argument with that person before. and i ALMOST got into another one bc i WANTED to tell them to "grow up" and point out that, yeah, DJ is the one that did that to hwoarang. not jin. ALSO LIKE. CANONICALLY. hwoarang DOES not even VIEW jin and dj as the same person!

so this definitely means hwoarang doesn't even blame jin for what DJ did to him in tk5, because he doesn't consider them to be the same. i wish the rest of the fanbase can think like hwoarang does!

yeah - they were also kazjun fans. which the op, as i said, made a post something along the lines of jun telling paul his consumption of hamburgers is unhealthy, then paul replying "you know what else is unhealthy? that relationship you have with kaz." and then a few annoying shippers freaked out about it and called it "pathetic," and "disrespectful to the characters" and all kinds of stuff. like i love the kazjun ship, i love the OVA because it explores what it could be. but holy shiiiit those fans need to stop being annoying about it.

LIKE they tried to say, "you can't deny the strong bond kaz and jun had!" and it's like WHAT STRONG BOND???? I'M SORRY. BUT CANONICALLY - KAZ HAD NEVER EVEN BEEN SEEN WITH JUN ON SCREEN, AND THE ONLY THING HE EVER SAID ABOUT HER, IIRC, WAS IN TK6 WHEN HE SIMPLY CALLED HER "MYSTERIOUS." jun had never spoke about him, either! HELL, in TAG 2 - WHERE WE COULD'VE HAD MORE DEVELOPMENT AMONGST THEM - kaz's ending didn't involve jun (not rly - it involved unknown, but NOT in a romantic way) and jun's ending didn't involve kaz. the only time we saw them on screen together IN A GAME, was in tag 1. devil's ending. again. i love the ship. but to act like it's some GREAT LOVE STORY ABOUT TWO PEOPLE WHO PASSIONATELY LOVED EACH OTHER TO THE VERY END AND ANYONE WHO SAYS OTHERWISE IS WRONG that's just... incorrect. we BARELY know their relationship. for all we know, it was just a one night stand! or they never had love for each other, but "fate" pulled them together to make jin. like. WE DON'T KNOW YET BECAUSE THEY WON'T TELL US. and the OVA can't be used as proof, because then you can use the 2010 movie as proof that jun didn't love kaz, but instead loved fucking steve.

you're right! i need to stop using twitter. i keep telling myself i'll stop! but yet - i always go to it when i'm bored and then sometimes i see ppl. it just annoys me that they have to be HATEFUL toward other people. ship what you want (as long as it's not fucking weird as i said - not talking proshipper stuff) but don't harass ppl for their ships.

[hoghtastic]

“I swear, at this point she’s just like a stalkerish fangirl following everyone who’s remotely associated with him… 😅”

I mean, that is his girlfriend? It’s not that weird that she would follow people that’s close with him I’m sure she’s met them more than once in the almost 10 months they’ve been together. (Because we know he’s always with his friends, even though he doesn’t post it as much) y’all are always saying something about every little thing she does when most of the time you’re not even right about what you say, it’s just speculations (none of it is fact, you have all created this whole fake personality for her and you don’t even know her for real?) it’s weird as fuck. You’re just making speculations solely off of the fact that you don’t like her and you feel some kind of way just because she’s with Alex. When someone points that out, you circle right back around to the only 3 solid reasons you (might) have for not liking her. And the main one is the “you snooze you lose” post (which you even admitted yourself that you all could still possibly be wrong about that being targeted towards fans because it “could be an inside joke that they had that she didn’t mean to post on the main one”. Hence why after she deleted it she added a post to the private. Because it was actually meant to be private?) after that you all just started picking at every little thing she did after that and taking it personally as if she’s sending some kind of secret diss to you all, simply because you’re his fans. Y’all sound crazy as hell and then wonder why he’s stopped posting as much and why he stopped wanting and allowing for people to be tagged him in stuff as much when he hangs out with people, because y’all don’t know how to respect his privacy. Y’all go and search on his friends accounts for any sighting of him (and if you’re not doing it yourself you repost what other people found, like reposting a story form the bar opening of the back of his head, just because it’s Alex. and it was posted on and account of someone I’m pretty sure he doesn’t even follow?) and then complain about the fact that “he’s a liar” and that “he says he wants privacy but then does the complete opposite by doing this and that” but you guys are the ones that go and invade said privacy, like he’s obviously pulled away from instagram more because of you guys. Because of the constant hate towards anything he does that doesn’t cater to you. It’s insane.

Alright anon, first of all, thanks for adding to the discussion. But before we can continue, please:

Because the way you sound so triggered over what a bunch of people speculate online about Johanne makes it look like you're either Johanne herself or someone really close to her (and also something else you mentioned, but we'll get to it). So, let's see:

You say that it's not weird because she's his girlfriend. Well, I'd say that it is. A couple can have a common circle of friends, obviously, but they certainly had other friends before meeting each other and/or will make new friends in other environments their significant other isn't a part of. And that's perfectly fine! Just because people are dating they don't become conjoined twins, they don't need to be together 24/7 and spending some time apart with other people doing different activities is healthy! One doesn't need to know and automatically become friends with everyone who is a friend/acquaintance or remotely related to their partner! And that's actually what we've been witnessing. Not all of the people she followed are actually close friends of Alex, some are just in the same field of work or crossed paths at some point, and she still had to follow them right away. And then you say that "she’s met them more than once in the almost 10 months they’ve been together". Taking Lucas as an example, why wasn't she following him before then? And only did last weekend after the bar opening? One would say they only met that evening and she didn't lose an opportunity to make another famous acquaintance and enmesh herself even more in Alex's circle. Also kudos for knowing the exact date they started dating.

You claim that we're always making speculations about her and that we don't know her for real. That part is true, I don't know her. But do you? If yes, please enlighten us and tell us why we're all so wrong about her. Because, personally, I'm not making speculations "solely off of the fact that I don’t like her" nor do I "feel some kind of way just because she’s with Alex". She's actually had some questionable attitudes which made me dislike her, and these weren't assumptions but facts — things that actually happened (not "might" have happened) and many people witnessed them (please refer to this post if you care about reading them, as I don't like repeating myself). And no, the "you snooze, you lose" incident isn't even the main reason. Stealing another person's artwork, making it pass as her own, and then pretending it didn't happen instead of acknowledging her mistake is. And I would have found this behavior really problematic whether it had come from Johanne or from any other person, regardless of whoever they were dating.

And while we're still speaking of the "you snooze, you lose" post, how can you be so certain that it was posted to her private account after she deleted it from her main one? Unless you're some kind of hacker, Johanne herself or someone close to her who actually follows said account? Or are you just speculating like everyone else here? Because if it's the latter, then you shouldn't be referring to us as "ya'll" as if you're any better, then.

While I agree that stalking Alex's friends looking for the smallest sight of him can be annoying to these people, most of them actually tag him in their stories, as if wanting a repost or at least some attention. And it's undeniable that a few people close to him have done it in the past. While others have set their accounts to private and/or avoid tagging him. But just for the record, all the content you'll see posted here comes from public accounts, as I believe stealing content from private accounts is wrong. And if I ever repost something (either from another blog, or something that people submitted) and you know that it was private, by all means let me know.

And by the end of your ask, I believe you're mixing things up. No one is saying that he's a liar about wanting privacy just because he hangs out with friends and is tagged partying with them, or takes part in public events (be it movie premieres, charity events or product launchings). People were just taken by surprise about him being so adamant on keeping his private life private for the past few years, but then suddenly exposing his relationship the way he has, either in the press or by having friends recording and reposting a birthday party, for example. And then him tagging his exact locations while on holidays. Just little things that don't match with being a very private person. In conclusion, it’s not about people digging online to find things about him, it’s about Alex himself being inconsistent in the way he handles his own privacy.

And last but not least, no one is hating on him. People are free to support and like a person, and still dislike and/or disagree with some of their attitudes. No one is perfect, anyway. But we're all entitled to our own opinions, which is exactly what we've been sharing here, in a way that isn’t harming or offending anyone. And believe me, if we were all “haters” this blog wouldn’t even exist in the first place, as I believe people have better things to do with their time than waste it with things they don’t even like. Which makes me wonder why you’re here? Clearly you don’t agree with what we’ve been doing here and you sent a whole ask criticising us for it, and what opinions we might have, but didn’t actually share your own. You defended Johanne, and while I gave you valid reasons as to why a lot of us dislike her, you failed to provide yours for actually liking her as a person and thinking we’re all wrong. So by all means, you’re more than welcome to add to the discussion and do so. Otherwise, you can always find other blogs whose content is more to your liking.

Either way, thanks for sharing your thoughts once again. Have a lovely day! 😊✨

[traumasurvivorshelpingsurvivors]

tw talk of nail biting? and stimming ig? i dunno wtf to tag this with, sorry.

okay, this is gonna sound really stupid. like. ik this is me overreacting but i feel like i just need to talk about it. advice would be great but if you just want this to be a vent, that's fine. im Xra.

i bite my nails ok? i bite my nails, i like, gnaw on my hands, pick at my skin, shit like that, I always have. the gnawing thing is a stim, like, i'm autistic and sometimes i just have half my hand in my mouth trying to comfort myself or contain my feelings. which sounds gross, i know it does, trust me, i've been told, you don't have to tell me. i've tried to stop. i briefly stopped biting my nails. long nails are sensory HELL and something bad happened and i just fell right back into it and i never stopped any of the other stuff.

but i have a sister, who i avoid, bc she's mean to me most of the time. i don't mean like, 'ooh my sister is just annoying :/ i hate not being an only child', i mean she's always telling me shit like she used to hate me, and stuff i need to work on so that i'm not so "abrasive" or "weird" or telling me stories about every time i messed up when i was little and how stupid i looked, which is realy fun because some of those incidents i didn't even realize i was looking stupid! she makes me feel bad. ANYWAY. she also likes to point out and kind of pick on me for my nail biting shit.

but she pointed it out when my mom was in the room. and most people don't say anything about it bc they know im very self conscious about it. but my sister was going on and on about how i needed to get a handle on it and how it looked nasty and then she turned to my mom and she was like right? and my mom, who usually says nothing at all about it! and has never been mean about it like this! went off on a tangent about how my dad bites his nails, his mom bites her nails, and how its a "generalational curse" from his side and how i'll probably do it all my life and chip my teeth and wear down my nails and have all sorts of complications that i'll have to deal with because she can't handle trying to convince me to stop. it was just. i was straight up crying. it was awful.

i guess it was meant to be a wake up call for me. and i guess i get it. its disgusting. and i'm fucked up or whatever. but i can't stop. especially bc of the whole autism and stimming shit. i know it's stupid to get upset because. she's right, i SHOULD stop, it is bad, ect ect, but i can't stop feeling really hurt about it because like-she never even apologized and she just pretends it didn't happened but now i feel even worse about it all and even more anxious, which makes me do it more. :/

Hi Xra,

I'm sorry to hear about what you've been going through. Please know that you're not alone.

While biting nails may be a destructive behavior depending on how serious it is, the way your family has approached it seems to be exacerbating it. It sounds like your family shames you for doing this, which may be making you do it more, or feel more secretive or shameful about it. But feeling shameful about it or wanting to hide it is not really going to address the situation or make you feel comfortable enough to work towards a healthier substitute.

It sounds like your sister is constantly criticizing you, and not in a constructive way. It doesn't sound like she necessarily wants you to improve or do what she can to foster a supportive environment in which you feel encouraged to work on improving, rather it sounds like she makes snide comments like that she used to hate you and just overall making you feel insecure. Though your sister may be frustrated with your nail biting, there are far more considerate and helpful ways to address it.

While I don't know the exact extent of your nail biting habits, it's worth considering that biting one's nails is actually extremely common, and though some people may see it as gross, it's mainly just seen as a sign of stress. It's essential to have healthier coping mechanisms in place that provide comfort and help you manage stress and anxiety. Exploring alternative stims or finding calming activities can be helpful in redirecting the need for stimming through nail biting.

It's important to remember that changing a long-standing habit takes time and patience. Instead of focusing on the negative aspects, try to approach this with self-compassion and understanding. Know that you deserve support and encouragement in finding healthier ways to manage your stress and emotions.

If you feel comfortable, you may want to discuss your concerns with a therapist who specializes in autism or anxiety. They can provide guidance and strategies specific to your needs. Additionally, seeking out online communities or support groups for individuals with similar experiences might be beneficial. Connecting with others who understand what you're going through can provide a sense of validation and support.

Please know that you are not defined by your nail-biting habit, and it doesn't diminish your worth as a person. Focus on self-care, finding healthy coping mechanisms, and surrounding yourself with understanding and supportive individuals.

I hope I could help. Please let us know if you need anything.

-Bun