#t.w. depression

[echo-stimmingrose]

"what are you doing?"

Oh ya know just forcing myself to do my makeup to keep the depression at bay.

[stqrbxy]

please call my name. [中也] chuuya nakahara.

he's there for you, no matter the day or time, he'll be at your beck and call; even if you don't ask for it.

t.w :  depression? burning out, vulgur language, just reader being tired of living.

Another excruciating day to get through, it's definitely not like you don't have enough weight on your back anyway. As a groaned muffle nuzzles against the comforting warmth the pillow provided you for your nights at your apartment, you had to abandon it for the day.

What a pain.

The scents of sweet dreams coaxed back to you, begging you back on its field of roses, but your body subconsciously moved to try — to prove their worth, to do their job, what's the point of their job if they don't even do it right?

Lazily, you trudge over to the sink, slowly squeezing out the toothpaste from its container onto the toothbrush; lethargically brushing your teeth and attempting to brush your hair in a way at least presentable.

You were a fashionable one, but today you weren't feeling like it, so you just slipped on the first outfit you found okay-ish in your wardrobe.

All actions are done in a half-asleep manner, no one — not even you, would be surprised if you didn't look as neat as the mirror reflected with blurry eyes gazing at it.

Exiting your bedroom, you are met with the sight of a short ginger lounging on your living room sofa. The one you're so very familiar with. How could you not? You could recognise those bleu céleste eyes even if you were on your last breath.

Speaking of the one and only Chuuya, he seemed to make himself at home, one leg over the other whilst sitting on your couch, the faintest sound of the television casting a romcom in it in the background as his eyes travelled over you. Frowning subtly when he saw the eyebags underneath your eyes, and how you didn't look even remarkably close to the enthusiastic person he knew you were.

Wait, how'd he even get into your house? Ah right, you gave him a spare key, but that brings another question to your mind —

" Chuu'? Don't you have work today? "

The words leave your lips almost without your own will, the blank look on your face causing Chuuya to dryly chuckle.

" No, not anymore at least. You've been clearly down for the past few weeks, overworked, not showing up to our dates — even more, because you're over the moon at the smallest amount of time you spend with me, "

The words weren't meant to be cocky or arrogant, it was the truth. Considering how busy both of you are, you both are equally elated whenever you two get to spend time together, no matter what you're doing.

" So, I've decided to take a day off for my doll, we can stay home, do whatever the fuck ya' want, just spend time. Would you like that? "

Chuuya asked, but both of you knew there was no other way out, he was a man of his word after all. A smile, which seemed rare after its long-term disappearance, appeared on your lips. A sigh escapes your body, treading over to your boyfriend as he smiles marginally at your submission. He wraps his arms around his beloved's body, whispering coos in his low voice as he brings you to sit on his lap.

Oh right, you had work, and you still didn't tell them that you wouldn't go at least. Either way, the exhaustion caught up to you, and you failed to argue any further, letting Chuuya carry you around for the rest of the day, treating you as a princex to be cared for.

With him around, you can let your insecurities loose and worries dissipate.

author’s note : back from the dead back from the dead I'm back from the dead back from the dead /lyr /ref with that out of the way... hope you all are doing great! I've been through a shit ton for the past few months, that's no excuse to slack off though. so, i hope to supply you with more fanfics of sorts; this fanfic is rather ahaha.. self-indulgent, hope some people can find a tinge of comfort in it.

[spookynessfm]

"It was pretty great. So, basically, anytime that someone from my hometown was feeling any kind of negative feeling, like depression, or sadness, or any time that they are mad at someone, Hawk Moth will Akumatize that person who was feeling a negative feeling. It's a pleasure to meet you too, Kayla! And I still have all of that right now. I can hand that to you right now." Chloé said. Chloé took everything that Kayla had asked for, and Chloé gave the frozen lemonade, and a cotton candy to Kayla. "And you're welcome! It's my pleasure!" Chloé said.

“Marinette thought that I could prove to be useful to people if I was working at a booth, alright, so what would you like to have? I’ve got cotton candy, frozen lemonade, snow cones, pizza slices, and a large variety of candy for every single person who wants some candy. Also, my name is Chloé Bourgeois. I know not everyone would know who Queen Bee is, but that’s who I used to be. A superhero. I can tell you more about this Shadow Moth/Hawk Moth person later, but what would you want to eat? I’ve still got plenty of this stuff in stock here.” Chloé Bourgeois said to the person who is near her. @forgottenfriendshipstarters​

[spider-stark]

HERE IT ISSS!!! I am so glad you liked my little concept because I couldn't resist and this Benji brainrot is legit ruling my life rn lol

This was so much fun to write!!! I legit blacked out and managed to write a concept that flows really well, and I am proud of??? iconic of me, ngl. Though, I had fix some spelling errors after I had already sent it in because it would bother me if I didn't, lmao.

ANYWAY, moving on.

T.W: death by childbirth, reader for sure has semi depression and self-loathing, lmao. some fluff at the end, arranged married, though it's left ambiguous at the end, etc!

Hope you enjoy!!

. . . . .

Miserable and lonely. 

Miserable and lonely were the two things you were feeling at the moment. 

Despite being back with your family, ever since you’ve been summoned home, to fight for that usurper craven Aegon, that is how you felt. It was home, but it wasn’t home. No, it wasn’t home. Home was, even if you hated to admit it, was with the Blackwoods at Raventree Hall. Despite being a pure born gold Bracken, you knew the seat of Stone Hedge wasn’t your real home. Now that your wardship at Raventree Hall has officially ended and you are back in the Riverlands, back at Stone Hedge, you knew, deep down, even if you didn’t want to admit it, it wasn’t your true home. Though, you didn’t know where your home was. You weren’t sure you had a home anymore. You aren’t even sure you know what that word means anymore.

As the servants left, you opened your hand’s palm, a thinning red line was still cut into it. A reminder of your last conversation with Benjicot Blackwood. You run your fingers across the fading line, remembering every word of the conversation you had last had with the Blackwood boy who seemed to have melted your cold exterior without even lifting his pinkie finger. 

Gold on your back but red in your veins. 

You shake your head, trying to forget the memory that had practically embedded itself into your brain, but it just wouldn’t leave you. A part of you, a small part of you that you would never admit, not yourself, and definitely not your family, was glad it remained there. That it had remained in your head for you to remember. 

For almost three months you’ve tried to forget about your time with the Blackwoods, with. . .Benji. But you couldn’t. The Blackwoods, even as they took in a daughter of their sworn enemy, never truly looked down at you, even being both a daughter and a Bracken. Unlike your “true” family, the Blackwoods never treated you like you were some pest, like you meant nothing to them, like you were nothing. 

You just couldn’t shake the feeling.

Dunking under the water of the tub, the water blocks out the sounds from both inside the castle and the outside. It was peaceful. You liked it. 

But of course, the peace doesn’t last when, from under the water, you could see a servant entering your chambers and you internally sigh before coming up from the water, your hair sticking to your bare shoulders. 

“My Lady, your father would like to speak to you.”

“Now?”

The servant nodded her head, a sad look in her eyes. What could that be about?

Now clenching your jaw, more out of annoyance now, you climb out of the tub as your maid quickly dresses you and does your hair in a simple braid down your back and you dress in a simple long-sleeved gold dress with a red underlining. Gold on your back, red in your veins. 

You silently step outside to where Lord Humfrey Bracken, your father and the head of House Bracken stood. You were silently relieved to see a smile on his face and not a grimace. At least it wasn't bad news, right?

“Father?” you say, coming up to him.

Humfrey smiles at you. “My dear girl! I have wonderful news?” 

You return the smile like the obedient and dutiful daughter you’ve always been, even when you knew your father, and brother, had been in the wrong. 

“And what would that be, father?”

“I have found a suitor for you!” 

Oh.

“Oh,” you repeat, this time out loud.”

Your father’s face drops. “My dear daughter, this shouldn’t be a shock! You’re a woman grown. It’s time to settle down, you’ve been quiet these past few months. Perhaps a family is just what you need.”

Family? What family? 

You swallow your fear, your anger, and your sadness, just like you’ve always done, and say, “Of course, father, but if I may ask, who is it?”

Lord Humfrey’s smile returns at your words. “Jon Tully, my girl. We’re having a feast to celebrate it in a fortnight!”

“Of course, father,” you say again. 

Your father dismisses you and you quickly begin walking back to your chambers, a sickening feeling in the pit of your stomach, and bile threatening to rise from your throat. You know, you know you would have to marry eventually, and you were fine with that, but you didn’t even know the man, and you were sure your father didn’t either. And you knew, deep down, in that secret place, your heart would never belong to any man, especially Jon fucking Tully.

As the feast had inched closer, your father had introduced you to Jon Tully. The man was, thankfully, just two years older than you, and was handsome enough, but he wasn’t him. He just wasn’t him. 

The pre-marriage feast had come rather quickly for your liking, almost too quickly, and now you sat, of course in Bracken gold, next to your father and brother, Amos. Your mother would have sat next to your father, trying to comfort you, you knew she would have. But she had passed from birthing you, which only gave more weight to you not really feeling like you’re nothing but a burden for your father and brother. You were told many times how much you resemble your late mother, almost getting nothing from your father, always a memory of his dear departed wife. 

As the feast went on, you talked to your betrothed, your soon to be mother and father in laws and even had a chat with Amos, too. But, you felt like you couldn’t breathe, like a wave of water washing over you again and again and again, so, telling your father you needed some air, you stepped out into the chilling, but still soothing, night.  

You twist your silver ring you had inherited from your mother as you bend down to the small pooling section, looking at your reflection. It definitely didn’t match how you felt inside. 

Once you splash some cold and cooling water onto your face, you’re ready to face the crowd and the man who you’ll be forced to be with for the rest of your life. 

Maybe you’ll grow to like him? 

As you turn, you feel a hand on your shoulder.

Now shocked, you turn around to hit the fucker who snuck on you, only to step back and immediately fall into the water, but not before you realize just who the person is and you grab his collar before falling backwards into the water so you both fall. 

Benjicot Blackwood had snuck into Stone Henge.

Under the water, you swim to him, not wasting any time in giving the man that is your true home, a gentle and tender kiss before coming up from under the water, where you stare shocked at the Blackwood man, who only gives you a grin. 

“Benji?” you whisper. You didn’t want anybody to notice that the Bracken’s sworn enemy was here right in the castle. “What are you doing here?!”

“I had to see you,” he says as he swims over to you. He cups your face before moving the soaking locks of hair stuck your face out of your eyes. “I had to see you, I know you’re getting. . .married.”

You try to avert your eyes out of guilt. You know you will never Jon Tully. You know it, your brother knows it, your father knows it, Jon probably knows it, and Benjicot Blackwood definitely knows it.

“I’m sorry,” is all you say.

“Don’t be. I knew this day would come eventually. I just wish it were me and not that Tully cunt.”

That gets a laugh from you. The first laugh you did in months. 

“We can’t do anything about it now,” you say. “My father has already decided. It’s set.”

“It doesn’t have to be.”

“It’s already decided.”

There’s a pleading look in his eyes, the same pleading look you had seen before you left to come back. 

“I can’t. I–”

Benji swims forward, gently grabbing your hand and showing you your palm. While still fading and slim, you could still make it out. He runs his fingers down the small line of your palm before putting your hand onto his chest, over his heart. 

“It doesn’t have to be. Jon Tully surely is a good man but will bore you.”

“I just can't get up and leave,” you say. “I have a duty and my father–”

“Doesn’t love you. Neither does your brother.”

“My father and brother do love me,” you say, this time snatching back your hand, and your tone much colder.

“Then why did they send you off to ward for House Blackwood for years? Why didn’t they, once, ever come see you, or even write you a letter?”

He was right. Never once did your brother or father even write you a letter, even one that simply stated that they missed you, let alone come visit you in your wardship. 

You can’t respond to that. You don’t know how. 

You do what you do when you want to shut off your emotions and push people away, you say nothing before going and climbing out of the water. But before you do, Benjicot Blackwood, the man who can read you like a book, or read you better then he reads an enemy, the man who you’re supposed to hate and who is supposed to hate you, and the man who made you feel again after years of emptiness, grabs onto your hand.

“I know you’re angry with me, but know this, I rather you be angry with me, or even hate me with every fiber of your being then shut me out. I rather you hate me because at least I know you feel something, anything, for me, as I do you.”

His confession takes a few seconds to sink in. You couldn’t believe it. You didn’t know what to say, so you stood there in disbelief.

He continues. 

“You once told me that you’re nothing. I want you to know you’re not nothing, to me, you’re everything.”

EVERYONE STOP WHAT YOU'RE DOING AND READ THIS

thank you so much for sending this to me, you lovely lovely anon!🖤 I absolutely love how you wrote this--I feel like you did such an incredible job at capturing that more choppy 'confused' sort of mindset that I wanted for the reader in 'the bridge' and I LOVED IT!

and you were so right--Benji would definitely crash a Bracken feast and the two of them falling in the water??? SPECTACULAR. CHEFS KISS.

amazing work!

[liyuee-qixing]

"In fact; I'm fucking terrified."

Scenarios: Characters with GN! MC freezing as a trauma response.

Characters:Satan, Leviathan

C.W/T.W: Trauma, implied abuse, implied abandonment issues. might be ooc

DISCLAIMER!!:i DO NOT romanticize depression,trauma,or any mental health in any ways,as I suffer from it too for the past year. This fic was made with no intentions to insult any person or community.

Author Note:my head is so dizzy I'm might pass out

Satan

Gehenna,a country with more violence tendencies than the other,a cruel country with it's people fist made of iron. Not to mention the nation streets were filled with Angels and bodies decay,the smell of old blood fill in your lungs in just any seconds you step in the alleys and streets.

You should've used to it by now,you better be used to it. But you didn't,when Satan or Sitri killed an angel right Infront of you, usually you shut your eyes tight,but this time.. it was different.

The angel blood splattered right Infront your eyes,the gory scene you were forced to see is enough to make you feel like puking,just enough for the past experiences to play back in your mind.

You cannot hear Satan or Sitri words,hells,or shout,you freeze there,the now broken,gory description of the angel body were right Infront of you,the smell hit your nostrils,inhaling,exhaling,your eyes started watering.

"maybe if I was a better child.."your trains of thought were quickly read by Satan,he immediately know that your actions was a trauma response.

He jumped Infront of you,taking your hand in his,as he wipe your tears away,not with panic.

"look, we're in this together, it's all will be alright"

He made sure from the day on, you'll never feel something such as bad to yourself,to never remember the shady blood tainted past of your,to forgot an old scars.

"how are you?" "I believe you" "take it slow" sweet affirmation pouring from his mouth just ensure your comfort,his hand finding your hair to stroke in a meanwhile.

Leviathan

You've heard worse; useless,ugly, undeserving,was nothing new to you, it's a daily things you receive everyday on your plate,you always gulp them down without fighting back, without any words, without telling anybody; because you have no one. Your body slowly reduced into a jar of unstable emotions with passing days.

Why are you surprised when Leviathan words were stabbed into you at right that moment,you thought you were used to it by now? Did you seriously thought Leviathan is going to protect you,just as he said? How dumb,in the end you'll have no one,again,nobody,your breath hitched as more of his insult fell down from his serpent tongue

You? The descendants of Solomon? The oh so great king of kings? Crying because you thought somebody is truly your friend and now insult are seeping through his mouth? How immature,you reflect no great ruler of all kings,your eyes twitching trying to suppress your tears

Say something,but your lips quiver and tongue back away, desperation is eating you alive,the results of not having any friends and being bullied come rushing stabbing at your heart,that sure to bleeds, without realizing, you're already crying Infront of the great leviathan,silently, without any sounds,you just stood there,in middle of the room,hands reaching out for him,but not moving.

You wanted to scream,yell,beg for him to not leave you,the look of concerning did not fit his handsome face,his insults stopped for a seconds,as he stare at you blankly,you wanted nothing more than to scratch your skin,tear it apart and disappear,you want nothing more than to not feel the way you feel right now.

"I need to do better for you"

Levi might not know how to immediately deal with you suddenly freezing,he'll let one of the nobles deal with it having to put his envy down for a moment just for your own sake

Though it seem dumb and childish for him,he tries to ensure that he is your friend from your point of view,he tries to not insults or say things that he doesn't mean or know wouldn't end good,doesn't mean you can have another friend though

"ermmememrmrm this is ooc as shit" how do you feel if I shove 60 tennis balls down your throat>_<

[bonnie-brady-is-writing]

T.W. sucideal ideation, depression.

PMDD is a monster I know closely.

When I was a teenager it used to be 3 days before, but now they arrive a week/10 days exactly before my period and tries its best to ruin all of me. The lies are so believable; I am unworthy, unlovable, disgusting, I shouldnt be alive and everything I have done and will do is trash.

It's such a vicious cycle of being okay, having things on track then your hormones running in and ruining all of your progress leaving you confused and lost again.

My main syptoms are recklessness, impulsivity, depression, sucideal thougts, low confidence, crying attacks etc.

I would genuinely rather have really heavy periods then PMDD.

Yes this illness has also cost me a job once and when I got my period I realised what I had done and felt so incredibly stupid for acting so impulsive over something that wasnt a big deal after all. But how could I have told my boss "Yeah actulley sorry that I quit my job it was just my period coming."

Stigma and shame revoled around it should not exist. I understand now that this is a disability; you are trapped under the weight of PMDD.

I know how hard and how unbearable it can be. Personally I think there should be more to treat it with then just basic birth control but of course we live on planet earth where everything has a solution except the issues women and people with uteruses have to put up with their bodies turning agasint them.

I've noticed that if everything in my life is going well then there are weeks where I can keep that horrid bubbling sensation under control, by letting myself know I am in that PMDD danger zone. Recently I have begun to take Ashwaganda and I feel like thats helping me a little. Doing what you really enjoy (for me its making music) really helps too. But I know its easier said than done when PMDD sucks the energy out of everything.

Anyone dealing with PMDD you are never alone. Do not believe the lies it tells you. You need to be alive, here with us now.

[jimmy-johns-was-taken]

hello!! I absolutely adore your writing and I wanted to request masky/tim x reader who’s having a bad mental health day. (feel free to ignore this if you don’t want to lol <3)

Thank you so much!!!!!!!!

I didn’t know if you wanted romantic or platonic; but I took it as platonic? I had a vision for a platonic reader, I hope that’s ok :)

We All Have Bad Days

Platonic Tim / Masky x Reader

T.W. Depression, mentions of self harm, smoking, mentions of past abuse, reader had a shit life before b coming a proxy, violence

Sliding through the now open window, you carefully landed on the floor. A simple home invasion, should be a piece of cake. Slender needed some files from the mother of the family, you didn’t know what exactly they were about, but you couldn’t care. He said you could kill them if you wanted, didn’t matter if they lived as long as you weren’t caught. With the week you had, you wanted to blow off some steam.

Quietly walking through the house, you poked around and attempted to find an office. People keep files in there, right? Or maybe some kind of study. Slender hadn’t given you much information, just where the house was, who would be in it, and your objective. Finding nothing on the first floor other than the kitchen, living room, laundry, and a home gym, you started your way upstairs.

The first room on the right was an empty room, looked like a teenage boys room. Messy, posters and flags lining the walls, dirty dishes everywhere. Nobody seemed to be in the room, so you shut the door and moved on. The room across the hall was a bathroom, which you didn’t bother with. The next room on the right was exactly what you were looking for.

The office was smaller, but neat and tidy. A dark pine desk was in the corner, bookshelf above it, with a computer, notepad, pens and pencils thrown around. Three large filing cabinets sat beside it. Grinning, you opened the one closest to the desk and began looking. Slender said that you would know it when you saw it, a dirty file case that was marked “1994” in large red ink.

You guessed it was some kind of evidence of slender or another creep, it needed to be destroyed. Not finding anything in the top, you searched the rest. Coming up empty handed, you looked around the room for anything else. Opening the desk draws, through some of the books, nothing was found. Panic slowly filled you, where was it? You shot a quick text to Tim, anxiety rising as you realized that the objective wasn’t there and you couldn’t complete the mission.

You set your phone down for a moment, re-checking the desk draws. You heard the phone buzz, but a gun clocking sound made you freeze. You looked toward the door as a women stood there, a small hunting rifle pointed at you. You had a hunting knife on you, but it wouldn’t do much good against a gun. Your baseball bat was downstairs and handgun was left at the cabin. You figured you wouldn’t need it, but fate would say otherwise.

As your phone buzzed once more, the women let loose, firing at you. You swore and ducked, trying to find your bearings. She let out a cry and turned on her heels, sprinting away. You sprung up, knife in hand, and chased her down the hall, to the last room. The master bedroom was large, with a walk-in closet and large bathroom connecting to it. The women, now yelling at you in a language you weren’t familiar with, pointed the gun at you once more.

“Jeez, will you shut up?!” You yelled, lunging at her. You grabbed the gun and threw it to the side as she shot, taking your knife in the other hand and quickly slitting her throat. As you glanced around the room, a file caught your eye. Old and dusty, the number “1994” in big red in. Bingo. Curious, you opened the file.

You stopped breathing. Panic and terrible memories flooded you. It was a picture of you, standing next to your mother. This picture was taken in 1994, it was of you in a Chucky costume on Halloween. A month before your father had been caught cheating and kicked out. A month before your mother had started drinking. A month before the hell of your life started. You felt like you couldn’t breathe, you wanted to just burn the picture. Not being able to go through the rest of it, you closed it with tears in your eyes, and turned back.

You stopped by the office, grabbing your phone. Tim had texted you several times, mostly asking if you had found it and if you were ok. You replied shortly “got it.” Back downstairs you grabbed the bat you had and left the house, walking back toward the mansion. Thoughts filled your head as you walked. Who was that women? How did she have that photo? How did she know you? Why would slender send you on this mission? You began to slightly cry, you just wanted an easy mission to blow off some steam after a rough week. Not be brought back to a life of abuse and suffering.

You quickly entered the mansion, bee-lining it for Slender’s office. You opened the door, not bothering to knock, and Slender’s attention snapped to you. You laid the file on his desk, nodding to him. He grabbed it, thumbing through the inside of it. He dismissed you without another word, opening the file and looking through its contents. You lingered for a moment, tempted to ask him why he had sent you on the mission. You decided against it, walking away and back to the woods. Now, the make it to the cabin without breaking down.

When you arrived, Tim was on the porch, smoking a cigarette. He looked at you, an uncertain look in his eyes.

“Mission go ok?” He raised a brow, sensing your off attitude.

“Yeah, fine,” you brushed past him, tears stinging the corners of your eyes.

He watched you walk inside, something telling him that something was seriously wrong. Toby was on the couch, eyes glued to some show. Brian was put on a mission with Cody and Kate, some surveillance mission. You quickly walked to your room, Toby glancing over their shoulder to catch a quick glance. They shrugged before turning their attention back to the show as Tim walked in.

You made it to your room and let out a shaky breath. You needed a hot shower, just to calm down and breathe. Making your way to the bathroom, you started the water and took off the bloodstained shirt. Scars littered your body, most were just from missions. But, you glanced to your arms. Long marks up and down your arms, you looked away and got in the shower. Once in, you broke down, your sobs being drowned out by the running water.

You were able to pull yourself together to finish showering and get out. Putting on comfy sweat pants and a oversized sweatshirt you stole from a victim, you flipped on the bed. Tear stained cheeks, you sniffled once more. Memories and thoughts flooding your mind, you felt your breath hitch as another wave of tears hit you. You began to cry again, tears soaking the pillow below you. A knock of the door snapped you out of your sob session.

“Who is it?” You shakily asked.

“Just Tim,” his gruff voice called. How long had he been there?

You opened the door, looking anywhere but his eyes. He pushed his way past you, shutting the door behind him and sitting on the bed. Seconds that felt like hours pasted as you finally looked at him. He noticed the puffy eyes, tear marks, red cheeks, and stuffy nose almost instantly.

“You ok?”

“No.”

Tim stood and walked over, pulling you into a tight hug. You stayed like that for a long while, in his arms sobbing. For fucks sake, you hated being like this. Weak in front of others, especially Tim. Eventually, you pushed away.

“My mom,” you started, “a picture of me and my mom were in that file. Before everything went to shit? When we were still happy,” you explained. Tim knew of your past and the shit-show your mother had put you through.

“I’m sorry,” he apologized.

“It’s fine, it’s gone now. Slender has it, out of sight out of mind.”

“How about,” Tim started to change the subject, “we head to the store yeah? We need some new food anyway.”

You looked at him a little confused but agreed anyways. Getting up, you threw on your shoes and left, Tim yelling at Toby that you were leaving. You hoped in the passenger seat of the old pick up truck as Tim started it up. The drive to the store was long and quiet.

When you arrived, you and Tim started shopping. At first, it was quiet and to a list. However, as you passed the candy isle, Tim took a turn. He grabbed some chocolate and looked at you.

“How mad do you think Brian would be if we spent a lot of money on candy?” He smirked, a small chuckle leaving him.

“Oh, he’d be very pissed, especially if we didn’t share,” you grinned, grabbing a pack of sour gummy worms.

From that point, you and Tim had eveything you actually needed, you both started to grab junk food. Chips, candy, and eventually you hit the bakery section. Cake, brownies, cookies, and more piled up in the cart as you both laughed. Brian would be so pissed, but the look on his face would be worth it. Paying, you walked out and started loading the back of the truck.

Unexpectedly, Tim grabbed you and threw you into the cart. He pushed you across the parking lot, you screaming and laughing the entire way. Putting the cart up, he pretend to leave you there, getting in and staring up the truck. You scrambled out of the cart and to the truck, yelling at him not to leave you. Both of you laughed and started your way home. It fell silent soon after, but it was comfortable.

“So, we don’t tell Brian about half of this, ok?” Tim spoke.

“Well duh,” you rolled your eyes, smiling at all the sweets.

“We deserve them, especially after this week. That mission Tuesday? We cannot let that happen again,” he explained, letting out a long breath.

“Real,” you responded, “thank you Tim.” You smiled at him.

“Of course,” he began, “listen kiddo, we all have bad days and bad weeks. It’s normal. Us proxies tend to have worse weeks than normal people,” he chuckled slightly. “But listen, it’ll be alright, ok? I know it was shit then, and sometimes it still is shit, but that’s ok. ‘Cuz after we have a shit week, we can go blow 50$ on sweets,” Tim smiled at you and you nearly lost it again.

“Thank you Tim,” you smiled back, a warm feeling spreading over your body. Although it was fucked up, you had a family. A family of murderers who lived in the forest and served a supernatural cryptid thing, but a family nonetheless. You would never trade it for the world.

[squishysquid88]

Secretive Sickness

Anybody else a chaggie fan? cuz I am.

this fic is about a very sick vaggie who tries her best to hide the fact that she's not feeling to great. however, time will tell just how long she can last.

T.W. mild cursing. If you aint cool with that, then......be warned

NOW ON WITH THE TALE!!!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Vaggie woke up feeling like shit, and it wasn't the normal kind either. her grey skin was doused in sweat, her throat felt dry and scratchy, her nose was red and stuffy, and her body was like it weighed 1000 pounds. not to mention the horrible headache. which included several sharp pains constantly stabbing at her skull. She groaned as she sat up, careful not to make too much noise. She didn't want to wake Charlie, who was peacefully snoring beside her. She dragged her legs to the side of the bed, her muscles felt soar and lazy, but she persisted. As soon as she got up, vaggie felt a wave of dizziness overflow her body. She stumbled for a moment but quickly brought herself back to her feet.

"That's annoying," she mouthed as she made her way toward the bathroom.

As soon as she took a glance at the mirror, Vaggie felt utterly disgusted at her reflection. her face looked puffy and exhausted, her hair looked like it could house a small family of rats, and her eyebags only made her look more depressing. Vaggie already felt like shit, and now she had to look like shit on top of that, what a shitty situation.

"nnnggghhhhhggh"

after properly dressing and taming her wild mane, Vaggie made her way downstairs to begin her busy day. Though she would rather go back to bed and take a load off, she knew she couldn't. Charlie didn't have work today, and there was no way in hell Vaggie was gonna make Charlie take care of her on her day off. Plus, with one person already gone she needed to pick up the slack, she couldn't have the hotel running behind on her watch oh no no.

Today's list of deeds included:

Help nifty and angel with cleaning and clearing rooms of their old furniture

unloading and transferring all of the newly ordered furniture from the delivery trucks to the hotel

moving said furniture into the previously cleared out and cleaned rooms,

keeping Angel from flirting with the delivery workers

properly file and deliver financial agreements and payments.

needles to say, today was definitely going to be a hard day's work.

Vaggie tried her best to make it down to the second floor without letting her legs collapse underneath her. Vaggie didn't even think she could get sick in hell, but nonetheless, here we are. The stairs felt like murder on her weakened muscles. With every step she only felt more and more dizzy. She wanted to turn around but it was too late now, she was too close to the second floor, where she and the others would begin their work. as she escaped the stairs grasp, Angel was the first to spot her.

"Bout' time tutts, where have you b-" angel hesitated on account of seeing vaggies appearance. "her are you doing ok, no offence or anythin' but you look like shi-"

"I'm fine Angel!" Vaggie interrupted, aware of what he was about to say "shall we?"

~~~~~~~~

As the day went on Vaggie felt herself getting shakier and shakier. Her limbs felt weak and unable while her headache only grew worse. angle and nifty continuously gave each other concerning looks upon hearing vaggies grunts and grumbles, Finally, nifty spoke up.

"Miss Vaggie, are you sure your feeling alright? We can always take a break if you feel like y-"

"No," Vaggie interrupts, again.

"I'm fine, lets just get this over with, we only have so much time until the delivery trucks get here." she said, the scratch in her voice leaking through her words

"A-Alright, if you say so" Nifty got back to work, trying not to question it.

They only had about two rooms to go, that's when Vaggie stepped away to go check on the preparations for the delivery. however, she was shocked to spot Charlie in the hallway just ahead of her. Vaggie hid and quick, she knew that if Charlie so much as looked at her she would immediately know she was sick. Vaggie hated worrying her, even worse she hated hiding from her, but that didn't matter. right now, she needed to focus on her job, nothing more, nothing less. she walked fast, despite her dizziness, and tried to brush past Charlie before she could get a good look at her face. Charlie noticed her and called out for her girlfriend.

"Vaggie!" Charlie sounded eager

"Sorry hun, in a rush, talk to you later!" Vaggie waved. trying to sound as clear as possible, worried that her voice would come out scratchy or cracked.

"Vaggie wait!" Charlie was already worried, but Vaggie was already long gone.

(thank fuck) vaggie thought (this hotel might be a rundown piece of crap but it sure is intricate).

Vaggie arrived at the main floor, when she saw delivery trucks parked outside the front door she couldn't help but be annoyed

"Why are they so early, they weren't supposed to be here for another hour!" vaggie grumbled.

She marched towards Alastor and Husk near the front. "there a bit early, don't you think" she thought outloud

"no kiddin' " barked husk

"well, better get started. hope angel and nifty are about done with the rooms" she said, taking a moment to scan Alastor for anything out of the ordinary

-He leaned over in response

"And what exactly do you want?" Vaggie growled

"why my dear, I should be asking you the same thing, being as though you were staring at me a great deal just a few moments ago." he blinked "though, are you quite sure you should be working?" he smiled

"Oh? don't tell me your worried about me?" Vaggie spat out.

"Perhaps, if worried means cautious then I do suppose I am" he replied

Silence filled the air

"After all" Alastor started "you do mean a great deal to out dear little princess, it would be a shame if anything happened to her beloved partner in crime, no?" he finished

"¿Qué tal si cierras la boca, pequeño pedazo de mierda?" Vaggie grumbled.

Alastor squinted, but hushed up anyway.

"Piche Puta" she uttered

Vaggie didn't like it when Alastor talked about Charlie in any way shape or form, she just didn't. She didn't really understand how Charlie could be so excepting either, she swore Charlie was just too good for hell. ...to good for her.

(Charlie) her name was the only thing she could think about

~~~~~

About half way in and vaggie feels exhausted. Her body felt numb and shaky, and her head continued to throb and pound on the walls of her scull. Vaggie needed to lay down, desperately.

Despite her now posseted demon strength, Vaggie still felt utterly and completely helpless the entire time they were working. Normally she was able to lift 10x the amount she was now easy, but at the moment vaggie was stumbling and wobbling all over the place. Husk didn't notice, he was too busy yelling at one of the workers for sneaking a shot of his booze. Alastor on the other hand, he definitely noticed, but simply chose to stay quiet. The freaky smile on his face seemed to say enough.

(Just a few more boxes) Vaggie though as she reached out for another.

However, one she took hold of the heavy box she soon felt another wave of painful dizziness, only this time she couldn't hope to balance herself like before. Vaggie felt her legs collapse beneath her, a loud ringing flooded her ears as she came crashing to the ground. the box following her trail, came crashing down just the same, Vaggie couldn't find the energy to get back up, instead, she felt the world around her begin to fade out and away as she slowly closed her eyes. now, Vaggie lay unconscious of the floor, the last thing she would hear before completely passing out would be,

"Vaggie!" Charlie screamed as she ran towards her.

~~~~~

Vaggie woke up in their bedroom, a blanket across her legs and a wet rag ~that felt amazing on the boiling skin of her face~ laid carefully across her forehead. oh and of course, a very worried girlfriend, that sat right across from her in a chair.

"c-Charlie" vaggie said weakly

"Vaggie!" Charlie practically tackled her

"Mierda!" vaggie cried

"why didnt you tell me!" charlie squeezed

Vaggie stayed silent

"I've been looking for you all morning! I-I knew something was wrong! but then as soon as I find you, you-you ran away from me" Charlie leaned back her arms still holding vaggies "you never run away from me" Charlie cried

Vaggie felt guilty, she glanced away and tried not to make too much eye contact, but Charlie wouldn't have it.

"Vaggie look at me," she took Vaggies face in her palm." Why didn't you tell me?

"I- I didn't want you to worry you " Vaggie looked down

"Its your day off, I didn't want to make you take care of me, and- and I knew that if you saw me like this then you would completely waste your time looking after me." vaggie looked up "you already do so much,"

"And you don't?!" said Charlie "Vaggie, you mean so much more to me that any day off-" "Exactly!" Vaggie interrupted "you needed a break-" "So do you!" Charlie snapped

"Vaggie, you work so hard, too hard. this is only proof of that. You push and push and you never let yourself breath, for hells sake! and whats worse, even when you're burnt out and hurting, you still wont let me take care of you! " Tears pecked at the edges of Charlies eyes. vaggie had no words,

"Vaggie, you need to understand that I care about you too, its not one sided. you're my girlfriend Vaggie, not my servant." Charlie lifted Vaggies hands up to her lips, "and I'm here for you," she kissed Vaggies knuckles, "no one else,"

"I-" Vaggies eyes had began to water "I'm sorry" she finished. it was at that moment, Vaggie finally felt safe enough to relax, she let it all out, all of her tears, all of her pain, and all of her shit. And all, while being gently cradled in the arms of her caring girlfriend.

~~~~~~

The two had been sitting silence for over an hour now, Vaggie had fallen asleep, and Charlie had been happily holding her in her arms, occasionally planting a kiss on Vaggies head. Vaggie was prone to growling or cursing in her sleep, as well as throwing a feeble punch or two.(sometimes not so feeble, Charlie can confirm) but Charlie always thought it was cute.

"my little tiger" she whispered. Charlie couldn't help but squeeze Vaggie just a little tighter, to her surprise, Vaggie had squeezed back.

"oh, I'm sorry vaggie did I wake you" charlie was quick to apologize

"..."

"Vaggie?

"-how did you know?" Vaggie asked

"what do you mean?" Charlie felt confused

"you said that you knew something was wrong earlier, how did you know? I remember leaving before you woke up, so you wouldn't notice anything. But you did, how?"

"hmmm, it, it was the smell,"

"the smell?" Vaggie scoffed

"yes the smell" Charlie laughed

"when I woke up, it smelled different, it smelled less like you. less like you and more like, well, sick. you could say it smelled like weakness." Charlie continued

"and you know this... how?"

"mm, instincts?"

"could you describe it?" Vaggie asked

"I can try, lets see. Normally when I wake up, It smells like dark chocolate and mint. its a bitter sweet fragrance than I only every started to smell the first night we spent together. at first it struck my lungs with a sort of knotty feeling, almost as if I wanted to sneeze or spit the taste out all together, but then it filled my body with a warm sugary sent that made me want to hold my breath and hang onto it for as long as I could before I had to let it go. and when it does leave my body, it leaves with a cool and calming trail of green leaves behind it, which only makes me feel more at ease then, I already do when you're near me. and as I've gotten more and more used to your sent, I've gotten more and more familiar with it, and as I continued to take you in the sweeter and sweeter the sent became."

Vaggie blushed hard into Charlies chest

But, this morning... this morning it smelt different. instead of a bitter sweat mint, it smelt more like a sour weed. the bitter beginning felt more like a sharp thorn, and the warm essence spiraled into a sour acidic flavor that clogged my nose and made me want to cough. the cool and calming leaves that I had once smelt before, turned into dying weeds and blowing dust. it was just sooo..."

"...shitty?" Vaggie finished

"yea, shitty, lets go with that" Charlie smiled.

Charlie kissed her one final time before insisting she go back to sleep.

"I love you Vaggie,"

"I love you too sunshine,"

"what's sunshine?"

"... its what you smell like" Vaggie said as she nuzzled her nose into the crook of Charlies neck, Charlie giggled at the ticklish feeling. Vaggie took a deep breath in,

"yup, sunshine," she nuzzled further "such an amazing smell," she said as she hazily drifted back to sleep.

"Buenas noches, mi amor" she mumbled.

Charlie smiled holding her tightly, humming sweet lullabies into the ear of her beloved girlfriend.

[gggafie]

T.W. Sad headcanons.

Okay, so I have this weird Bill Cipher backstory headcanon, so lemmie just put it lightly, and I'll also put the evidence that strengthens my case.

Story: To put it simple, Bill basically (on accident) burned down his own dimension. But since it was an 'Entities Blue Flame', he couldn't put it out. And since he didn't want to see it all crumble, he ran away. He kinda thought that he'd turned evil and gained a bad side of himself. There was still good, way deep inside. Yet all he needed was someone to be there for him. But since all people thought he was some heartless villain, no one wanted to be nice.

Evidence: And with all that, the phrase from the Axolotl "says he's happy he's a liar." I immediately thought. "He has depression." I mean, the poem from The Axolotl got me to start this headcanon.

"Saw his own dimension burn.

Misses home and can't return.

He says he's happy. He's a liar.

Blame the arson for the fire."

It says it all right there.

But that's just a theory.

[itisannak]

Dr. Angel Face Prequel Part 9: Meet the Family (Calum Hood Fluff)

Summary: Calum's mom and sister visit him in California and they finally meet (Y/N), probably in her worst possible moment. (T.W: Mention of Death / Description of Depressive Episode / Mention of Car Accident) (Words: 3.1k) (Penultimate Part of The Prequels) Dr Angel Face Main Stories: Fetish / Heat / Heat Extended / Dr. Angel Face / Dr. Angel Face Alternative  /  Dr. Angel Face Prequel 1 , 2 , 3 , 4 , 5 , 6 , 7 , 8 , 10 /  My Full Masterlist  /  Dr. Angel Face Masterlist  

"Nervous about meeting my mother?" Calum asks as I take a look at the souffle in the oven. "Not really. I am way more nervous about meeting your sister." I reply, taking a deep breath in anticipation. In less than 2 hours, I will be meeting his mom and sister, two of his absolutely favorite people. "She is your age, you will get along." He brushes me off, sticking his tongue out as he laughs while I narrow my eyes at him. "Did you just jab at our age gap?" I ask him, making him roll his eyes. "Age gap... It's just 4 years. You need to relax." He replies, wrapping his arms around my waist and pecking my temple. "And now I am worried about meeting your mom too... What will she think of the age difference?" I sigh, biting the inside of my cheek. "She already knows I am dating a MILF." He states, earning a slap on his hand. "I am not a MILF. First of all, I am not that old. And second, I am not a mother." I point out and he hums, moving his lips down the side of my neck. "I can help with the second part of it." He grazes his lips over my sweetspot, making chills crawl on my skin. "You have to leave for the airport. Think of the traffic." I moan, feeling a ticklish sensation caused by his lips. "I'd rather think of you. Plus, we have at least an hour and a half before they even land." He counters, tilting my head to the side to gain himself more access. "Traffic can be brutal heading to the airport." I deny him, moving from his embrace. "For someone so anxious about meeting my family, you sure are eager for me to pick them up." He comments and I sigh. "Your mom and sister both have traveled a very long trip to see you. The least you can do is be there on time to pick them up." "In all honesty, they saw me not even 6 months ago. They are coming for you, angel." "Did you tell me that so I can just dip?" I ask him and he chuckles. "You will be fine. They are not gonna bite. That's my job." He winks, leaving a kiss on my forehead before picking up his phone from the counter. "Please, no dirty talk, or innuendos in front of your family. I am begging you." "I will have to consider that. I like the way you get flustered by my comments." "Calum..." I protest. "Can't hear you. I am leaving." He says cheerily, strutting towards the front door.

Despite jitters making my stomach a tight knot, I managed to finish cooking and set the table in Calum's backyard. As per usual, it is a lovely day in Los Angeles and it would be a pity not to take advantage of the beautiful weather and have a meal outside.

I hear Duke barking towards the door as I finish placing the pot of ragù for the pasta in the middle of the table. I straighten up and head inside through the kitchen door, bracing myself for the moment I have been so anxious about.

I walk to the front of the house, kneeling down to pet Duke and get him to stop barking. There is too much noise in this tiny dog. "Bud, it's ok. You'll tire your voice." I coo at the dog and scratch behind his ears. "I got the bags..." I hear Calum exasperate as he opens the door. I put on a smile and move aside to clear the way for them to walk in. "Ah, there she is... Mom, Mali, this is (Y/N). (Y/N), my mom and sister." Calum introduces us, right at the moment the two women walk in. Joy is the first to approach me, pulling me in for a hug. I am surprised, pleasantly surprised, but still taken aback. "It is so good to finally meet you in person. All Calum did over Christmas was talk about you." Joy says, pulling away to take a better look at me. "It is a pleasure to finally meet you as well. Calum talks about you all the time. How was your trip?" I ask, smiling at her. "Very long. Thank you for asking." "Mom, don't hog the girl. There are others waiting." Mali comments, moving to hug me. "I have been wanting to see you in person for so long. You are even more gorgeous than Calum told us." "Oh my, thank you. Calum sure talks a lot." I turn to my boyfriend who smirks and shrugs. "I thought my sharing was confidential. But apparently, everyone is kissing and telling in this family." Calum glares at the two women. "Oh, hush. We haven't even told her half of what you have told us." Mali comments. "And that is the reason why I am never telling you anything again." He sighs. "I have set the table outside. Hope you don't mind." I change the subject, pointing to the backyard. "Just give us a minute to freshen up and we will be right in there." Joy turns to look at Calum for directions. "I'll take you upstairs, and show you your rooms too." Calum picks up the luggage, signaling the 2 women to start heading upstairs. "See you in a bit, (Y/N)." Mali waves at me with a soft smile on her lips. She looks just like Calum, who in turn looks just like Joy. It is like seeing triple.

"You are a surgeon, you can cook... Is there anything you cannot do?" Mali asks me as I serve her a piece of souffle. "I cannot ride a bike... So, put that on my disadvantage list." "You cannot ride a bike?" Calum asks me in surprise, eyes widening. "I really can't. I never learned how to." I reply, making him scoff. "How come I didn't know?" He asks me as I hand him back his plate after serving him. "I guess it was never brought up." I take a seat, picking up some salad. "Calum told us you are a pediatrician." Joy comments and Calum groans. "Mom, I told you she is a neurosurgeon..." He says through gritted teeth, almost protesting on my behalf. "Cal, come on. It's fine. I am a neurosurgeon, but I am doing a fellowship in neonatal and pediatric neurosurgery. So, I am working with babies, children, and adults. Everyone really." I explain. "It must be very challenging." Mali comments and I nod. "It is. But I cannot imagine myself doing anything else. I think I had settled down on what I wanted to do at the age of 2. By 10, I know it had to be neurosurgery. 3 days into my internship, I knew I had to work with children." "Anyways, enough about me. Calum tells me you are a musician as well. Does musical talent run in your family, or...?" I ask and Mali chuckles. "I think he is just copying me. Like all younger siblings do." Mali playfully eyes Calum, who smirks and shrugs. "She is just mad because I dethroned her." He comments and Malik cackles. "You wish you could dethrone me." Mali rolls her eyes and I laugh. "Were they always like that?" I turn to Joy who looks at her children proudly. "Always a headache. Especially my Calum. But I dread the day they will stop being like that." She looks at them with so much love in her eyes, clearly showing she has missed her children interacting like that. "Do you have siblings?" Joy asks me and I shake my head no. "I am an only child. But I have a lot of cousins. So I sort of get this dynamic." I gesture to the siblings who are still oblivious to us talking. "Are you close to your parents?" "Very. I don't see them often, due to work, but we call each other frequently and I visit as much as I can." "Do they live far?" She asks me and I shake my head no. "Not really. It is a four-hour drive, but I don't always have the energy to travel there and I need to always be available in case there is an emergency at the hospital." "Your parents must be very proud of you. So young and already so successful. And a hard worker." "Mrs. Hood, you are making me blush. Thank you so much. It means a lot hearing it from you. You have raised such incredible children. Especially Calum. I don't think I have ever met anyone like him." I turn my head to look at Calum, who is showing something on his phone to Mali. "Please, call me Joy. No need for formalities." She reaches to cup my hand in empathy.

"Shall I bring out the dessert?" I ask once I see everyone empty their plates. "What are we having?" Mali asks. "I made my very famous salted caramel cheesecake." I reply, making Calum moan in excitement. "This is one of the reasons I fell in love with her." He comments, and I roll my eyes. "I'll come help." Mali offers, standing up from her chair. "Coffee?" I ask Joy who nods. "Mali knows how I take it." Joy looks at her daughter who nods her head. "How can I forget?" She sighs, following me inside.

"Thank you for offering to help." I turn to her, heading to the fridge to bring out the dessert. "It's the least I can do. Your food was amazing." "Thank you. I don't cook often, to be honest." "I get why. But it was really great. It must have taken you all day to cook all that." "Not really. I am pretty good at multitasking. And Calum also helped." "Oh... I don't remember Calum ever being good at cooking." She comments, searching the cabinets for mugs. "He is great at it, though. He always cooks for me whenever I stay over." "You don't live together?" Mali asks surprised. "No. I am staying here for a few days because I have some issues with my roommate and I am looking for a new place." I explain and she hums in surprise. "I thought you had moved in. Oh, well. My bad. And I hope you find a solution to the whole housing issue soon." "Thank you. Oh, can you excuse me for a second?" I ask as my phone rings. Mali nods and turns to the coffee maker, focusing on making coffee as I accept the call.

(Calum's POV) Mali approaches the table, looking at me hesitantly, like a scolded puppy. "Cal, something is wrong with (Y/N)." She says worriedly, making me look at her in confusion. "What do you mean?" "Is she ok?" My mom asks and Mali shakes her head. "Her phone rang. I heard her say the name Robin... They talked a little and (Y/N) took off crying." "Her supervisor, Robins... She is teaching her the techniques for her fellowship. Crap... I'll be right back."

My heart is pounding as I look for her, just the thought of anything hurting her makes me furious. I can hear her sobs even before I open the door to the bedroom, and my heart sinks to my stomach. "(Y/N), darling..." I call her, not wanting to startle her with my presence. "Baby, what's wrong?" I walk further into the room, softening my voice as she turns to look at me. "Nothing. I am fine. I will be downstairs in a minute." She tries to pull herself together, but her voice breaks and soon the tears she so carefully tried to dry are back in her eyes, threatening to spill down her cheeks. "Angel..." I sigh, moving to take a seat by her side on the bed. "Don't worry about coming downstairs. Tell me, what happened? Mali told me Robins called." I cradle her face in my hands, trying to make her look at me, make my presence there conscious. "She had an accident." She can barely mumble before the next fit of crying. "Who? Robins?" I ask her, trying to make sense of what she is telling me. (Y/N) shakes her head, no, her bottom lip quivering. "The mother of the baby. The one I was supposed to operate on once it was born... She was in a car accident... And she..." (Y/N) cannot bring herself to finish the sentence. She buries her head in my chest, sobbing onto my shirt. "Oh my God... What about the baby?" I ask her, and at that moment her sobbing becomes louder. "It is unfair... So unfair. I could have saved her. I could have saved her, but I didn't have a chance. I could have fixed her. I could have given her a normal childhood. But I didn't have a chance... I didn't have the chance. It is unfair." She sobs, her speech becoming slurred. "Honey... I am so sorry... Sweetheart..." I don't know what to do, or what to say to make her pain go away. All I can do is press pecks on the top of her head, and let her cry it all out. "It's not your fault, baby. It's not your fault." I repeat, time after time, hoping it gets through her head. Because it is not her fault. It is not, and she should not blame herself for the death of that woman, or the death of that child.

-

I open the curtains letting the morning light fill the room. (Y/N) is still in bed, covers brought up to her ears, unbothered by the sudden change of lighting in the room. I walk to the bed, taking a seat before I bring down the covers a little. "Good morning, angel. It is time to get up." I say softly, stroking her arm. "I just want to sleep." She mumbles, still in the same motionless state. "You have been sleeping since the day before yesterday. You haven't eaten anything since dinner with my mom and Mali." I comment but she groans. "I am not hungry. And I just want to sleep. Leave." She sounds exhausted, which is not fitting for someone who has been sleeping for nearly a day and a half. "Well, this is not happening, so let's get over with the hard part and get out of bed." I pull the covers off her body, making her curl up in a fetal pose. "I hate you right now." She mumbles but I just brush it off, picking her up from the bed.

I put her over my shoulder, carrying her to the en-suite bathroom. "Let's get you washed up..." I let her on her feet before I turn the tap on in the shower to warm up the water. "Don't you even think of running back to bed." I help her out of her pyjamas, while she looks at me like she is detached from what is going on currently. "Alright... You can be like that if you want to, but I am not going to let you crawl back to bed." I say softly, pressing a kiss on her forehead. I strip off my clothes too, before helping her into the shower. "It would be so much easier for you to just let me lay in bed forever." She comments as the water hits her. I grab her shampoo from the rack, pouring some into my palm. "It would be... But I am always up for a challenge." I lather her hair up with the shampoo, massaging it onto her scalp.

"You got me out of bed, you got me washed up, you fed me... Don't you think it is enough?" (Y/N) asks in frustration as I practically drag her out of the house. "It is enough when I say it is enough. Now, into the car we go." "Don't you have to spend time with your family? Isn't that the point of them traveling all the way here?" She asks me and I shrug. "They are visiting Ashton today. He is taking them for lunch and then to see a theatre show. More questions?" I ask her and she groans. "Why won't you let me just stay in bed?" She asks me. "Would you? Would you let me wilt away in bed for something that was not my fault?" I ask her softly and she sighs. She silently walks to the passenger side, still keeping her detached look.

"I know it is not my fault." It is the first phrase she says since we arrived at Malibu Beach. I turn to look at her, clearing her face of the strands that the air has blown onto her face. "Thank God for that." I reply, stroking her cheek slowly. "I just can't accept that I didn't have the chance. I can't accept that the baby didn't have the chance. There is so much beauty in the world, and that creature will never get to see it, experience it in all its glory." She sighs, covering her face with her hand, blocking the sun out. "It is unfair, I am pissed about it too. But falling apart is going to rob all those children who are waiting for you to work your miracles of the opportunity to be treated. You can't control everything, angel. The car accident was out of your control, you couldn't have predicted it, you couldn't have prevented it. What you can do now is make sure you do your best for the next baby that will need your help, for the next person that will be on your operating table." I stroke her hair, listening to her breathing calmly. "I am so tired." She sighs. I can hear in her voice how tired she is, despite the long sleep. "Bailey said you shouldn't step foot in the hospital until Monday. And she will only allow you back in the OR after you get cleared by a psychologist. You have time to rest." I assure her, but she groans in response. "It's really shitty that I will be away from surgery until I get cleared." "I mean, who would be benefitted from you having a breakdown during surgery?" I ask her. "Your family must be hating me." "My family doesn't hate you. My mom is very worried about you. Especially yesterday when you didn't eat all day. She wanted to force-feed you. They actually really appreciated how involved you are." I assure her, pressing a kiss on her head. "I know I have been the worst girlfriend ever in the past few days, nor the easiest person to comfort or help... But you were the most amazing boyfriend. I mean, you are. You did exactly what I needed you to do, even though I didn't even know what I needed." She says softly. There is still sadness in her voice, I can still sense that her faith in this world has been shaken. "I hope I never have to do that again." I reply, meaning it with my whole heart. 

- Dr Angel Face Main Stories: Fetish / Heat / Heat Extended / Dr. Angel Face / Dr. Angel Face Alternative  /  Dr. Angel Face Prequel 1 , 2 , 3 , 4 , 5 , 6 , 7 , 8 , 10 /  My Full Masterlist  /  Dr. Angel Face Masterlist  

[echo-stimmingrose]

Percy: I can never please you people!

Nico.......Where is this going?

Percy: Most of the gods hate me for existing right!?!

Nico: Yeah but, I mean, that's not really your fau-

Percy: But as soon as I try not existing everyone else gets mad at me!

Thalia: Perseus! *sprays with spray bottle*

Percy: Stop spraying me!

Nico: *sprays with spray bottle*

[audiopendent999]

Hello, welcome! I'm Jo, and this is my blog :))))

This blog is to keep track of my studies, my mental health (major depression, PTSD, BPD) hobbies (baking, music, drawing, painting, etc.), and for some occasional venting (T.W.'s will be included at the top of each post and tagged).

Short term goals: by October 16th 2024 📅

Finish three books (9/3) 💪🏼

Volunteer at local food bank three times (0/3)

Finish translating three pages

Mid-term goals: by August 2025 🗓️

Finish PCT training

Obtain PCT Certification

Start Associates in Psychology

Finish translating 50 pages

Long term goals: (within the next 10-12 years) 📅🎊

Obtain a bachelor's in psychology

Finish med school

Finish residency

Get board certified

These will become less vague as time goes on, but hopefully y'all won't mind coming along for the ride!

Don't interact: TERFS, transphobes, racists, homophobes, etc. Please be respectful.

[censuredadmonition]

Hello, I'm Kankri Vantas, but you can just call me Kann, I'm one of the hundreds of thousands of trolls who are dead in the bubbles, possibly with more time dead than alive.

I welcome you to my blog, a place where I can post how my things are going on the Disgrub server and, maybe waste time, answer questions if you leave me any.

As important basic information.

- I am a mutant blood. - I died at 10 years old. - I am a seer of blood, ascended. - The blog "castigatinggospel" is basically my blood brother. - T.W. this blog touches on sensitive topics with depression and my plans to die again.

And thanks for reading.

[ OCC: main account @banban-ana-rt ]

[juliesdiary]

06/02 T.W.

I’m overstimulated and overwhelmed. I need to release, but how am I going to do that in public? On top of that, I don’t even have the equipment to do it. What’s more, my mom’s calling me over to do her a favor. I honestly thought this part of my life was over a long time ago. After all, it's been over a year since I’ve had the urge to cut myself again. At this point, I don’t think my depression will ever go away. It’s always going to be there in some shape or form. I remember when my parents found out, they tried blaming it on the kind of music I listened to. Trust me, it wasn’t Asking Alexandria or Pierce the Veil that made me depressed. Then they tried to say that everything was just an elaborate act of jealousy towards my younger sibling, which had never crossed my mind. Nope, it wasn’t that either. I know it began in middle school in 6th grade, then it got better in 7th grade and then severely plummeted in 8th grade. Then it kinda disappeared in 10th grade but always lingered throughout high school. Then it came back in college, and it’s been on and off ever since. I’d like to say that we’ve learned to coexist, but when it hits, man, does it hit. I often think about what life would be like if I ever went through with it. When my dad passed away, I screamed at God that it should have been me. Had it been me instead, my family would still be okay. They wouldn’t suffer as much as they do now since my dad was the main breadwinner and head of the household. I mean c’mon, my sibling was only 15. That’s a critical age where a child needs their father. Had it been me, things would have been smooth sailing. I don’t contribute to anything. I just take up space. I just get everyone annoyed, upset, or pissed off. My dad took care of everyone. He made my mom feel safe. He gave advice. He taught us important life lessons. He had a reason to live for. He was loved. It’s been proven time after time that I’m forgetful and never anyone’s 1st, 2nd, or even 3rd option. Even my own ex-husband saw that I wasn’t worth anything and left me. So why couldn’t it have been me? I heard that some life insurance covers suicide, but you have to wait 2 years. If it were to happen within the first 2 years, then the policy becomes invalid, and your beneficiary gets nothing. I wish I could get a million dollar policy and put my family as beneficiaries so that I could finally be of some use. I’d be out of their way, and I’d be setting them for life. Everyone wins. Sometimes, I wonder if I don’t die from suicide if I’ll die of sadness. I can feel it weighing down my heart like as if someone was sitting on my chest. How ironic would it be if I ended up living to 100 y/o instead?

[wyked-ao3]

Ok I'll sign myself up for this fun but I'm only going with a few this time lol @the-golden-comet and @sunglasses-in-the-bentley thank you both for the tag

*edited also thank you @jev-urisk for the tag I was writing this out when you tagged me :) *

Np tag @rotting-moon-writes @lychhiker-writes @gioiaalbanoart

Oisìn Mallory

It means little deer Oisín is an Irish male given name; meaning "fawn" or "little deer", it was picked after I decided on Daimhín's name.. he is a spitfire character with a large heart and has lost everything but his royal fleet crew. He also just showed up one day....

Daimhín Heorot

His name is based in Gaelic as well but his name is rooted in the word for stag... he is loyal above all else ....not sure where his inspiration came from yet to be honest Heorot has a few possible meanings hero and stag both being one of them

Adoh stone

is a masculine Irish and Scottish Gaelic given name, The name means "fire" so his name is fire stone and he is a blacksmith (it's his fault he refused to pick a name lol) his personalitys is complicated. He is quiet often and I suppose I connect to him that way

Jade

Jade means "precious stone." But it was also a insult It was first used in Middle English to mean “a broken-down horse.” in a way both fit him extremely well.

Spoilers for future book below also ⚠️T.W mentioned passive suicidal ideation ⚠️< honestly not much worse than that, but just to be safe

Jade will be Galen's "precious" but not until towards the end of that book knowing jade lol. He is similar to "a broken horse" due to his life. He is definitely depressed and has trust issues a mile wide.. could be considered passively suicidal but Jade is aware his family would just have him resurrected..if he died. (I have trust issues so I suppose I highly relate to Jade that way)

✨OC Origins Name Tag Game✨

Thank you for both the tag AND the game, @pixies-love-envy ! Though, I think people will be disappointed to hear most of these are just my brain saying, “Yeah I like how that sounds”

I want to know how you came up with your original character’s names and personalities. Are they based on people in your real life? Are they straight from your brain? Are they a mix of several people?

Speaking of….

Peter Hart

So obviously “Hart” and “Heart” having a double meaning, but a “hart” is also the name of a male deer in England, and I see Peter as a handsome young buck. A leader of his pack, looks gentle enough, but will absolutely gore you with his antlers if you get too close.

And the name Peter? Brain said: “What’s a good name that Benjamin can yell in a British accent? Peter. That’ll do.” Also lots of pirates with names consisting of “Pete” (though Peter hates this nickname)

Benjamin Bartholomew

(If anyone is named Benjamin Matthias Bartholomew, I apologize in advance for what I’m about to say)

I basically asked my brain: “Pick the most pompous, pretentious, princely sounding name you can think of.” And this is what it came up with. Also his initials are BB, and he is, indeed, BB ✨

Ali

“Ali Baba and the Forty Thieves” from Scheherazade’s 1001 Nights.

Noah

The Story of Noah’s Ark (his eyes are olive-colored)

Tenshi

Japanese for “Angel”. Bro’s name is literally Angel.

Tyrell (Tyr)

Named after Tyr the Norse God of War, Heroic Endeavor, and Justice. Also “Tyrell” means “stubborn,” and he ABSOLUTELY is.

Tagging (no pressure): @fortunatetragedy (curious about Sullivan, Royston, and Khalid Abandonado), @autism-purgatory , @alinacapellabooks , @gioiaalbanoart , @wyked-ao3 , @drchenquill , @lychhiker-writes , @honeybewrites , @deanwax , @sunglasses-in-the-bentley , @jev-urisk ,+open tag! ✨

[flutter-study]

depression t.w.

The way last year traumatized me so much I forced myself to delete photos of it so I wouldn’t keep revisiting it and getting sad 😭

I’m always comparing myself to others and feeling sad for how little I’ve achieved but I realized how much pain I was going through during senior year of high school and freshman year of college. I have to give myself more empathy. I wouldn’t ask a disabled person who couldn’t walk why they didn’t walk. Similarly I can’t ask myself why I couldn’t do more when what I was doing was truly the best I could do. I could’ve dropped out of school but I didn’t. I could’ve ended my life but I didn’t. The best for different people is different.

I might not even be here. I might have been 6 feet under and yet I’m still comparing myself and my accomplishments to other people.