#sustainable inserts
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author-james · 7 months ago
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hivepixels · 1 month ago
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being a sollux fan is suffering cant even check his tag w/o getting ersl as the first result😭😭 pissed me off so bad i actually blocked the artist sjdjsjjsjdsj
HELPPP i wish tumblr's filter content settings actually hid posts entirely instead of leaving it behind a wall. but i will say there were two fairly recent ersl interpretations that i found pree fresh, rlly gotta clown these charas for the funs
#ask#anon#mumblings#not sure if ive mentioned before but one of my earliest exposures to ersl was from a super old humanstuck slkt fic#its been 2yrs since i last read it so i may have misremembered the details and thereby fudge this description but#the premise had slkt being poor living together w karkat working his ASS off to the boneeee barely afloat providing for both him and sollux#they're dating but sollux was v mentally ill + extremely distraught and depressed after accidentally killing aradia in a car crash#he became confined to his room and when he wasnt bedridden he was physically and verbally lashing out at karkat. its heavy and upsetting#meanwhile karkat was churning multiple jobs just to sustain them - he's hurt stressed and in pain from losing the sollux he once knew#but he still insists on staying bc he cares abt sollux. then after a few months of this sollux's dad refused to keep paying for his meds ??#the bill was so expensive kaRKAT BROKE DOWN AND COULDNT TAKE IT ANYMORE!!!!!!!! i forgot what happened immediately afterwards but#they split and sollux gets kicked out (?) while karkat slowly recovers from the sheer survival mode trauma of the whole experience.#then ~Timeskip to the future~ where karkat finds out sollux's mental health improved significantly.... & that he's happily dating eridan :D#UGH. cant help but laugh just thinking about it.#bcs iirc sollux explains to karkat how eridan is loaded asf and can easily afford all the necessary medications sollux needed to get better#thats how the fic concludes btw. karkat still alone with eridan suddenly getting inserted as sol's uber lucky rich bf benefactor#like gawdd. this is THE funniest possible way of adapting the “slkt lowblood vs ersl high/lowblood” dynamic to its closest human equivalent#i hope i didnt just hallucinate this whole thing pls i cannot for the life of me remember much other than that twist ending#decade-old darkfic demonstrating relationship between class poverty mental illness and the american healthcare system! still relevant today
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ikilledamanforthisurl · 12 days ago
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really fun parallels between Minami & Nishida in which one guy who wants most of the fights he gets into generally has a bit of a dodgy win/lose ratio, meanwhile the other who has only ever welcomed one single fight in his life is the more violently competent
#ikildaman shut the fuck up#incoming tag rant whoops#nishida (rgg)#minami daisaku#and also the one fight Nishida ever welcomed was one that he lost too#to be fair it Was with Goro Fucking Majima like hes Going to lose. but still#it could also be 2 for 2 if you count the time he went on strike for majima construction where majima once again beat his ass#at least that fight was worth fighting!#its a bit of a stretch on Minami's side maybe but i've definitely always headcanoned him as being first in the water so to speak#i always thought his job was like. related to corralling the juniors. like its a misnomer title sort of. so in that environment it makes#sense. he knows what the ppl around him are/arent capable of and it'd be his responsibility to not get them majorly hurt killed et ceteras#if hes collateral though its fair game#cant experience shitty boss dad disappointment punishment so on and so forth if youre dust! win#but also i wholly believe its an ego thing esp if its related to sparring w Majima. i just know that guy fights his own men#more like Jumping them tbh Sparring has too much mutual respect implied in the act#if thrs an opportunity to lock horns with the boss Minami is all over it. this is the most attention hes had in months and it sustains him#and its definitely shortened his lifespan while he was at it#although he never wins (re: Goro Fucking Majima) but i have to wonder how well he fairs with anybody else#he managed to sweep a bunch of Saejimas friends ig. Not Saejima himself but thats obvious Saejima could punt him across the room#insert 'i read saejima throwing him across the room and got so hard i threw up' joke here etc#the fight with Akiyama didnt happen that was a fluke he doesnt exist. blah blah blah cope and seetheage#if we're gna powerscale my unironic stance is he'd put aki in the ground#& should have. & did. to me. yay. heart. okay heart
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merulanoir · 3 months ago
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Despite how heavy today feels (partner flew back across the big pond and I don't know when we will see each other again), I try to look around and remind myself that a year ago I wouldn't have dared to dream of being where I am now.
I moved away from the hicktown to the city I have always loved, I get to be an active member of my shul now, I finished my giyur, I'm one thesis away from getting my BBA, and I have a job as an accountant.
And even further than that: five years ago I was seriously depressed, somewhat freshly divorced, only at the beginning of my transition, living in the middle of nowhere, and stuck in a job that was fucking up my health. Oh and, yeah, there was a global pandemic I guess.
I can't even imagine what another year or five will bring.
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alienheartattack · 1 year ago
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Me: All fanfiction is valid!
Also me, gripping my bejeweled chalice in rage: Character x reader is a pox upon the land
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dandyshucks · 10 months ago
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trying to decide which account to post the art to,,,,, i think i'm gonna do my art account bc I'M SO PROUDDD OF THIS SHIT HOLY MOLY
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dirt-str1der · 2 years ago
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Awed by my unparalleled genius back when i was in the bnha fandom (i do still want to fuck that old man this will never change)
#Listen to my problems#yeah i had a self insert hero name stasis and his power was telekinesis BUT the weight / impact of anything he moves with his powers gets#transferred to his body which means for every falling building he stops his ribcage will explode im kidding but he does get very injured if#he decides to do this. he can weather quite a few hits but he is only human. anyway sustained use of his power will result in crush injury#which is what earthquake victims and such get when something falls on them and pins them down for an extended period of time. and also s#suru (thats his name because his ability is to ‘lock’)#has a big big big crush on all might after he punched the shit out of him during a bank robbery (suru used to be a villain before he went to#jail for his crimes) and all might nearly killed him because suru made the mistake of locking all might who immediately tried to force his#way through it which made suru start coughing blood and screaming and crying and shoot blood from his eyeballs and mouth and nose and#despite this he still attempted to lock a piece of falling debris before it hit all might (he likes all might) so he decided to go easy on#him ....... anyway he ends up working at all might hq as a free lancer and he falls head over heels for all mights sexy secretary who he#walks home every day because they live on the same street (unfortunately for all might who doesnt like people knowing where he lives)#anyway i didnt mean to go into detail about their little love story i was expounding on my smart brain#surus story ? is named Crush Syndrome <- i will never ever come up with a better pun for anything
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yanderenightmare · 5 months ago
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TW: slight nsfw, omegaverse
gn reader
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The big, strong Alpha who is super needy and clingy with his omega mate. Utterly infatuated by you—ecstatic you finally agreed to be his. Every day is a new honeymoon, wrapping you in his big arms and lifting you off your feet, squishing you tender. Telling you you’re gorgeous, nearly getting teary-eyed when gushing over how cute and bite-sized you are, even when you’ve got sleepy eyes and bedhead, wearing what you slept in—his oversized shirt.
He just can’t handle how baby you are.
Your mating mark has only just healed—the skin thin and tender, scarring nicely into a perfect print of teeth that are unmistakably his. And still, he wants to mark you anew every single day.
You’re trying to read. Lying on the couch with a book perched atop the mass of your giant Alpha boyfriend, who has you draped under him like a thick blanket. Your chin rests on the meaty muscle of his shoulder, peaking over the blade and his broad back to the book you struggle to hold open, arms only barely reaching around his waist in the position—it’s a little straining, but it’s the best you could ask for as you have no chance telling him to get off without him looking up at you, big puppy dogs eyes on the verge of tears.
His face rests in the grove of your neck, licking and sucking the healed bite he’d left there a couple of months ago. Grazing it with his teeth, he gives it a few lingering nibbles that cause a slight sting.
“Hey, you,” you warn, like an owner calling the name of their pet when they’re doing something they know they’re not supposed to. His movement stills, teeth resting in half a bite. “The doctor said to leave it alone.”
He hums and goes back to sucking again, only tenderly kissing it.
You continue reading, but it becomes impossible as his back raises. The link of your arms breaks, not long enough to sustain the stretch, and your book pays the price, lost in the struggle and falling to a close on the floor.
You sigh with a blank stare at the ceiling above, thinking—this is hopeless.
Meanwhile, he continues unbothered, mouthing along your artery up to your ear. You shy away from the tickle, and he moves on to your cheek.
“Hey—”
He eats the protest from your lips, replacing it with his tongue. You don’t push him away—it would only make him whine, so you indulge him. He growls softly as you open your mouth for him.
His hands squeeze your waist impatiently, slipping beneath the band of your boxer shorts and immediately grabbing both handfuls of your ass—lifting you and slotting himself between your thighs. The bulge is enough to make you moan.
“Geez…” you mumble once your lips part, speaking thickly with breaths “It’s like a never-ending rut with you.”
His voice is even worse off. “I can’t help it. You’re just so pretty.” A continuous whimper laces each syllable, all but feeding you the words, unable to keep his lips off you. “I need you so bad it hurts.”
Beneath the whining, there’s a rumble in his chest. You feel it as you put your hands on his chest, a low running growl pushed down and kept there as he does all in his power to hold back.
You cup his big jaw with both your hands, looking at his miserable face with a sigh, “What am I supposed to do with you?” You look him square in the eye with strictness. His hands all but quake, giving you the silent look of pleading, begging for your mercy.
You end up sighing again, this time in defeat. 
“Okay, big boy. Fine. Once more before bed. But you better go easy—I wanna be able to walk tomorrow—”
He kisses your pout and moves downwards, smearing sloppy pecks down your chest, chanting, “Thank you, thank you—”  and pulling your shorts with him as he goes.
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♡ BNHA – Deku, Shoto, Denki, Kirishima, Hawks, Natsuo, stupid soft Bakugou ♡ JJK – Gojo, Yuji, Geto, Yuuta, Choso ♡ HQ – Bokuto, Miya twins, Kageyama, Kuro ♡ CSM – Denji ♡ AOT – Eren, Armin ♡ DS – Zenitsu, Tanjiro
♡ FEM x M INSERT masterlist ♡ GN x M INSERT masterlist
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dandey-lion · 6 days ago
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Dpxdc prompt.
Imagine there are tinier ancients, ancients of planets. But instead of every ancient having one planet, they would be the ancient of a group of planets that are similar and possess similar qualities.
For simplicity, I will refer to these ancients as the ancient of [insert planet of our solar system that falls under their domain] ex: Ancient of Jupiter
For years, the Ancient of Mars has harbored resentment against the people of Earth for throwing their little machines all over her precious planet. They take parts of it back- for study, they say! Why, There’s even rumors of those little pests moving there! How dare they!
And they just keep coming.
She complains to the Ancient of Earth, but again and again they disturb her perfect planet.
One day she snaps.
She descends upon Earth.
The Justice League is scrambling- they had no time to prepare for such a large threat. Unless they stop her, she will transform Earth into an unrecognizable planet- a planet like Mars, which cannot sustain all of Earth’s life.
Unless they stop her, it will be a massacre that they may not recover from.
So they have to stop her.
They go to fight.
They have gotten ready the best they can. They have found where she is. They go forth to fight for their home and everything in it-
She’s thrown in front of them, battered and bruised, shaking and trembling. They ready themselves as she tries to get up, but a flash of green obscures their vision.
The light clears, they dare to look up.
Bright, green glow. White, floating hair. Shimmering black and white clothes that hold the stars.
And his eyes.
Wild and angry, so full of raw emotion it exudes from him in waves.
This man, too ethereal to be real, glowing, holds the Ancient of Mars by her throat.
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zaydaliciousdesigns · 1 year ago
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youtube
Just trying to make my wardrobe more unique and sustainable on item at a time.
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reasonsforhope · 4 months ago
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"For over a decade, the Yosemite toad has been recognized as a federally threatened species, after experiencing a 50% population decline during the Rim Fire of 2013.
The wildfire, which encompassed a mass of land near Yosemite National Park, made the amphibian species especially vulnerable in its home habitat. 
Native to the Sierra Nevada, the toads play a key role in the area’s ecosystem — and conservationists stepped in to secure their future.
In 2017, the San Francisco Zoo’s conservation team began working with the National Park Service, Yosemite Conservancy, U.S. Fish & Wildlife Service, California Department of Fish & Wildlife, and the U.S. Geological Survey. 
The goal of all of these stakeholders? To raise their own Yosemite toads, re-establishing a self-sustaining population in the wild. 
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“Over the past several years, SF Zoo’s conservation team has been busily raising hundreds of these small but significant amphibians from tadpole stage, a species found only in the Sierra Nevada, for the purpose of reintroducing them to an area of Yosemite National Park where it was last seen 11 years ago,” the zoo shared on social media. 
By 2022, a group of toads were deemed ready for release — and at the end of June of this year [2024], 118 toads were flown via helicopter back to their habitat.
“It’s the first time anyone has ever raised this species in captivity and released them to the wild,” Rochelle Stiles, field conservation manager at the San Francisco Zoo, told SFGATE. “It’s just incredible. It makes what we do at the zoo every day worthwhile.”
Over the past two years, these toads were fed a diet of crickets and vitamin supplements and were examined individually to ensure they were ready for wildlife release.
Zoo team members inserted a microchip into each toad to identify and monitor its health. In addition, 30 of the toads were equipped with radio transmitters, allowing their movements to be tracked using a radio receiver and antenna.
The project doesn’t end with this single wildlife release; it’s slated to take place over the next five years, as conservationists continue to collect data about the toads’ breeding conditions and survivability in an ever-changing climate. They will also continue to raise future toad groups at the zoo’s wellness and conservation center...
While the future of the Yosemite toad is still up in the air — and the uncertainty of climate change makes this a particularly audacious leap of faith — the reintroduction of these amphibians could have positive ripple effects for all of Yosemite.
Their re-entry could restore the population balance of invertebrates and small vertebrates that the toads consume, as well as balance the food web, serving as prey for snakes, birds, and other local predators.
“Zoo-reared toads can restore historic populations,” Nancy Chan, director of communications at the San Francisco Zoo, told SFGATE. 
Stiles continued: “This is our backyard, our home, and we want to bring native species back to where they belong.”
-via GoodGoodGood, July 11, 2024
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xian · 2 years ago
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the general north america public focusing on "saving the honeybees" and their deepest mainstream discourse being "but do we really need honey?" (which isn't the goddamn point of caring about pollinators anyway) despite honey bees being a non-native species to the continent and ignoring all the native and esp. the native specialist pollinators (that don't make honey but are like the goddamn glue of all life forms and societal pillars relying on flowering plants in any way) is like western/mainstream media going "kpop? oh u mean b*s? lame. [insert dismissive and/or racist comment here]"
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zahri-melitor · 4 months ago
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Anyway thinking again about how I wrote Tim saying that it feels like "I'm easy to overlook" and how the thing about Tim is that basically none of the worst things that have happened to him in his life are because of him, or centred on him, he just suffered as a result of events where the perpetrators never really thought about him at all.
Because one of the side effects of being the Team Up Robin is that for so many things Tim was not the primary victim, but because he's there and he cares about so many people, he suffers as well, and he loses people and he is rarely allowed to centre himself in that loss. And when he does, the fandom often pushes back that 'it's not about you'.
The only loss he's seriously ever been allowed to hold onto as his own is Jack's death (and maybe Kon's), and I think that is partly because the fandom generally would like to not make sustained eye contact with the rest of Identity Crisis, despite how much story it drives for DC comics for the following few years.
Even to Mr Oz removing Tim from Gotham in Tynion's run, it's all explained as not being about Tim, it's because Tim's presence makes things work and that's a problem to Mr Oz's plans.
This is a character who looked at an unbearable hole in Bruce's life and found a way to grow to help fill that hole by taking on the role of Robin, and even as he was trying to step into shoes he thought would always be too large for him he was dealing with the fact his mother died because someone was trying to conceal major corporate theft and learning to deal with that loss himself.
Tim loses himself on occasion in terms of having been there and helped and someone else's pain being considered the more major factor, to the point he gets accused of inserting himself into the situation.
Like why is he easy to overlook? Because things don't happen to cause him pain deliberately, because his problems are often happening in the middle of bigger troubles elsewhere, because what Tim specifically brings is, so much, about his networking power and the way he makes systems function, which is underappreciated and often not recognised until it fails.
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oh-my-damn · 2 months ago
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Cat Behavior
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Pairing: Astarion x Female!Tav/reader
Summary: You've noticed certain behaviors in your vampire lover. And it's adorable.
Wordcount: 1600
Warnings: None. Pure, unadulterated fluff. Fun and sassy (and in love) Astarion. Astarion being a kitty-cat.
Masterlist
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The best part about getting that damn worm inserted in his head was the fact it took away some of the side effects from being a vampire.
Astarion had never been able to enjoy the benefits of being one - for 200 years he was forced to do his masters bidding, always hiding in the shadows and being fed rats to sustain himself - if he was allowed to eat, at all. That's without even mentioning the things he was forced to do, the matter of his consent not even an afterthought in Cazadors mind.
But the tadpole had taken away those issues, even if it was only temporarily for now, which allowed him to enjoy the things about himself he hasn't been able to for the past 200 years. Those things included his speed and agility when fighting, using his fangs as both a weapon but also as a way to taste the sweetest nectar he could ever imagine. Nothing quite compared to sinking his teeth into your beautiful neck, the little shivers in your body as he drank from you.
Except maybe one thing.
The tadpole allowed him to be in the sun, again.
When the nautiloid first crash landed and he was thrown from it haphazardly, he thought it would be the end of him. He woke up on that beach, and he immediately felt heat - something he hasn't felt in several lifetimes. He thought that would be the end; that he would perish right there, on some disgusting beach surrounded by smelly fishermen and even smellier mindflayers, burning in the sun.
But when his scarlet eyes popped open after minutes of feeling that heat but no pain, he realized that whatever had been done to him must have had an affect on his vampirism, in some strange way.
And since then, he has cherished being in the sun – almost as much as he cherishes being around you.
You've noticed how he tends to gravitate towards the sunny spots wherever you go. The first time you took note of it was in Grymforge. Astarion had managed to find the only spot in your entire camp where, despite Grymforge being in the Underdark, a small beam of sunlight had made it's way through the rubbles.
You chose not to comment on it, though. It didn't surprise you to learn that he wanted to enjoy the sun for as much as possible, after hundreds of years of lurking in the shadows. Seeing him in that spot in your camp reminded you of the first time the two of you spent the night together - or rather, it reminded you of the morning after the two of you had spent your first night together.
Waking up to see him standing in that clearing, his eyes closed and head tilted backwards, soaking in the warmth of the sun. You hadn't fully realized what it meant at the time, being so early on in your acquaintance, but you understood now.
Which is why you've never mentioned it to him when you notice him subtly moving around whenever you're in camp, to try and find the best patch of sun to sit in. Part of you is unsure whether he is even aware he is doing it - it starts out with him leaning towards where the sun is moving, and then shifting short distances when it moves too far; all while still reading his book, or talking with the others, or drinking his wine.
The one time it does annoy you, however, is during times like today.
You're all back at camp, enjoying a well deserved half day off, and the sun has been beating down on you for most of the day. The afternoon is lurking, which means the sun is slowly moving across the sky, preparing to set for the day.
You're sitting around the un-lit campfire with the others, Karlach and Wyll sitting at your left, Gale and Shadowheart at your right, and Halsin and Jaheira straight across.
Everyone is talking casually or reading a book, seemingly all enjoying an afternoon of quiet resting before your next big confrontation interrupts it.
You and Astarion are sitting on a blanket, each of you with a glass of well deserved wine in hand. Well, perhaps sitting is not the right word; he is leaning back on his hands with his legs in front of him, and you're resting your head on his thigh. He's deep in conversation with Halsin, and you wouldn't have considered Astarion to be as interested in the druid as he seemingly is, if it wasn't for the fact you suspect he might be just a teensy bit attracted to the beefy elf.
You're having a conversation with Karlach and Wyll, the two of them asking questions about your past and defending their inquiries with the fact that you know so much about them and they barely know anything about you.
You're replying with chuckles and smiles for the most part, indulging them, carefully taking sips of wine with your head leaning on Astarions thigh.
The sun moves slightly on the blue sky, as it always does this time of day, and you want to curse at yourself for not seeing what happens next coming in advance.
Just as you're about to reply to one of Karlach's questions, your pillow (Astarion's thigh) is snatched away from under your head, resulting in it thunking against the grass. Your boyfriend shifts away, completely oblivious to what just happened as he lets out a delighted laugh at whatever Halsin tells him.
Your let out a hrmpf at the impact, your brows pulling into a frown when you sit up, rubbing the back of your head with your fingers, "Ow."
Karlach and Wyll both watch you with widened eyes, their gaze bouncing between yourself and Astarion, the latter still completely unaware of how he just moved away from you to accommodate for the moving sunbeam he always chases.
"What just happened?" Karlach muses, tilting her head. The question makes Astarion glance over at her, taking a sip of his wine, "What do you mean?"
You narrow your eyes when they find your lover, letting out another disgruntled noise, "My head just hit the grass, you oaf!"
You push at his shoulder (gently) to make your point, making him spill af few drops of wine, "Hey, watch it! This is a perfectly balanced red!"
You glare at him, his scarlet eyes searching your face in confusion, "Astarion!"
"What?!" He exclaims, looking utterly confused as he looks between you and the others, "What is it?"
"You made my head hit the ground when you moved, you doofus!" You exclaim in exasperation, scooting closer to him to get back to your former position, your lips forming a pout, "Apologize."
That makes him frown instantly as if the notion of apologizing is obscene, his nose wrinkling as he glances down at the blanket, "What are you talking about, I didn't even move?"
"Yes you did!" You exclaim, and Karlach chimes in with a "Yeah, you did," which makes you look at him pointedly.
Astarion's expression only gets more confused, but he glances at the others who look equally confused yet entertained by whatever is happening between the two of you right now.
You let out a dramatic sigh, sitting up to point at your former spot, "We were over here, now you're over here. See? You always do this."
"Do what?" He asks in annoyance, "I don't even remember moving."
"I know," you quip, grabbing his glass of wine out of his hand to take a sip, "But you always do it. As soon as the sun moves, you do too."
He blinks in surprise, and the others around you snicker in response.
"What do you mean?"
"You move with the sun, vampy," you jest, cupping his confused face in your hands, "And normally it's real cute, but not when I'm using you as a pillow. Got it?"
His eyes search yours, his lips lifting slightly at your teasing expression, but he looks a little embarrassed when he asks, "I move with the sun?"
"Uh-huh," you nod, ruffling his hair and making him sputter in protest, "Whenever the sun moves so you're no longer in it's direct path, you move to wherever you need to in order to get back in it. It's very cute, all things considered, but it's not very practical when I need to use your milky thighs for resting. Okay?"
He pushes your hands off at your little comment, making the others chuckle, and instead he reaches up to curls his hand around the back of your neck. He smirks, clearly embarrassed and a little flustered but trying to hide it as he pulls you closer, "All right, I think we all got it. I move with the sun."
"Yep," you quip, "Just like a kitty cat."
His eyes narrow as the others laugh, and then the two of you have a staring contest, each refusing to back down. Your smile turns wider, enjoying the teasing banter between the two of you, your previous gripe already forgotten.
"Are you calling me a cat, darling?" He asks, his voice lowered, "Is that what I am to you?"
"Yes, just a cute kitty. Like Halsin!" You muse, glancing over at the wood elf. Astarions eyes dart over to look at him momentarily, and you can tell he gets even more flustered when the large elf only smiles back at him.
"You hear that, Astarion? Guess we have more in common than we thought."
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zeedist · 1 month ago
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NONE LIKE YOU .ᐟ — AYATO
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what's so special about you? summary: a little look into why your clan leader favors you so much. sfw .ᐟ fem!reader x ayato, not-established relationship, boss x secretary, ayato pins for you [quite badly, if you ask me]. word count: 1.4k proofread: nope. a/n: this was supposed to be shorter... and there was more to this but i am half-asleep, but wanted to get this out tonight. expect a couple of grammar mistakes.
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Being the secretary of the head of the Kamisato Clan ensures you a stable position in society. Despite the constant meetings, demanding rigid nobles, and the ever-growing, never-ending stack of responsibilities that lingers no matter how many sleepless nights you spend, it is a decent job. The salary sustains your lifestyle, and you even started saving towards a house with it. And most importantly, your boss, Ayato Kamisato. Albeit a man of particular habits and strict in his business, you managed to prove your worth and earn his trust. Eventually, his fondness as well. To the point, he trusts your opinion to the extent he allows you to act on his name more often than not. 
Who wouldn’t want the position you are in? 
Very few dare act towards it, though. Not foolishly ignoring how the clan head keeps you by his side always. Not insolently denying how he never trusted his assistants until you arrived. Everyone recognizes that this special treatment you got from him wasn’t because you were his secretary, but because it was you.
Replacing you? Pft, Ayato might as well cut off a limb. 
Except that losing you would be worse than losing his right arm.
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Half-asleep and with a cup of tea in hand, you sit in your designated spot —a comfortable cushioned chair beside the clan leader’s. Sleepiness still weighs on your eyelids as you sip your warm beverage, starting your morning with the same routine. This also involves your boss standing behind you, combing your hair carefully to not pull on the knots, and tying it on a knot for you. For the sake of work, he argued the first time he offered to in a morning you woke up too late to comb through your morning hair. And ever since, it has become one more habit in the long hours you spend working together on a daily basis. 
“Not too tight?” Ayato checks after brushing it into a low-hanging bun, and you only nod as you try not to burn your tongue drinking your cup too fast. 
However, today, you feel something being inserted in the bun. Before you ask, Ayato already is extending a hand mirror for you to look at your new hairpin. Dangling with a precious glimmer of silver, adorned with a delicate flower made with azure gems. A carefully crafted piece, either imported from foreign lands or an antique gift by a noble. The color reminds you of him. 
“Sapphires suit you the best,” he comments, eyes looking at yours through the mirror. He always does that, always seem to be seeking for you even when in the same room. 
Reaching for it, you drag your finger carefully on the smooth surface of the jewels. You wonder then how much it must have cost to acquire it, or if it could even be acquired in the first place —you shouldn’t be accepting such a priceless item. But Ayato knows you too well, reading through your mind and interrupting your thoughts with a gentle squeeze of your shoulders and a softened smile. 
“You have lightened my burden considerably. It is thanks to you that I can be at rest. This is merely a small show of my appreciation. Please, keep it.” 
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The summer heat clings to his skin as he walks inside his office, slipping off his outer robe immediately to try to cool off after dealing with an outside meeting with a fellow lord. It had not gone well. Now, he wasn’t the type to explore into fits of anger or to blow up his upset with alcohol, way more refined than that. Instead, he seeks you, and when not finding you in your usual spot beside his desk, his nose scrunches. Empty. Your seat and his chest. That’s what had felt so odd in his office, there wasn’t your pretty voice greeting him as he arrived. 
With a sigh, he settles in his seat and catches movement in the corner of his eye. Ah, maybe you had fallen asleep in his reading area. You rarely did, finding it disrespectful to use your lord’s things but he insisted you did when too exhausted after long nights. Almost happy, he looks up to the lounge chair in the small library in the room, hoping to find your adorable figure sleeping peacefully. Instead, his mood drops to the ground when he sees another woman instead. A maid, he assumes by her attire, organizing several documents. Your documents. 
“What are you doing here?”
The words leave his mouth so harshly, that even he is surprised at his anger. What bothered him so much? That someone intruded in the privacy of his office, bypassing the guards somehow in a clear breach of security? That the maid hadn’t greeted him according to etiquette and thus clearly lacked the standards to work for his estate? No, none of that.
Because those were your things. The ones you split your head open with headaches and countless hours sorting out for an entire week. He still remembers how content you looked when done, saying it lessened your burden significantly to have everything coded in your way. 
So why would this random person dare touch your things?
“And with whose permissions are you being so bold, touching my property?” Heat seethes through every word even when he smiles, eyes narrowing into crescent moons. 
“I’m sorry my lord! I only wanted to help you—”
“No one is allowed inside my office without permission, it is one of the first things you are supposed to be taught. If you aren’t smart enough to follow that, you are not qualified—”
She interrupts him and cuts through his words with an offended remark.
“But she comes in and goes however she pleases! She and I are no diffe—”
Red flashes in his vision, blood boiling. Her little speech muddles into a blur in his head, eyes opening darkly. The same? You, the same as this thing? There isn’t anything to compare in the first place, not even a reason to do so. To compare you? Had she lost her mind? He racks through all possible ways from here on; remove her from the Kamisato estate without a recommendation letter, ensure no other noble families hire her, and ruin— 
“Ah, you are here.”
Your face peeks through the door before walking in, an angel incarnated. With a hand sliding the door open and the other holding a full tray, you unknowingly save a stranger from living miserable for the rest of her life without a job. You even give her a small greeting, polite as you are, a little weirded out by how the maid stammers with flushed cheeks and runs away. 
“Huh, what’s with her? Anyways, guess what I got!”
Your excitement spreads to him, face shifting entirely with a softer warmth nestling in his lower stomach. He doesn’t even try to guess, letting you place the tray before him and listening to you explaining in detail each of the pastries you selected from the kitchen. Your sweet voice stirs fondness, his eyes following your lips more than what follows your words. You’re so precious, trying to incite him to eat something after he skipped lunch earlier. You speak so nicely of the custard tart, inviting him to take a bite. He does, of course, he does. 
You might as well give him a bottle of poison and ask him to drink it with that endearing smile of yours, and he'd happily chug it down to the last drop.
“So, how is it?”
“Not bad.”
Too bland for his taste, but seeing your smile widen is worth every bite. Unexpectedly, you pull something out of nowhere, his eyes widening slightly when processing what it is. 
“I know it isn’t sweet enough for you,” you —an absolute blessing— place down the cup in front of him with a proud smile that looks oh-so-adorable on you. “I got you your drink, of course. Shook the milk with ice but no ice in the drink so it wouldn’t water down. Double pump of thick syrup. Ha, am I not the best?”
Only you would take your time to learn about his little particular tastes and make them out for him out of the pureness of your heart and not because it was your job to please him. He gives you one of those rare smiles where you can see his teeth. 
“Yes, you are the best.” 
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my-darling-boy · 6 months ago
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(TW injury description)
I am SO glad you asked I lose my mind over this man. Sidney Beldam! He’s most known for his miraculous recovery from a major facial injury sustained while he served as a young sergeant in the First World War. If you’ve read the Facemaker by Lindsay Fitzharris you might recognise him! Sources differ slightly about his story, so I’ve pieced it together as best I could. The photos below were from about February 1919!
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Born in 1897, Sidney was about 17 living with his mother in Cambridge, England when the Great War commenced. While he didn’t enlist initially, he was soon conscripted when it came about in 1916 though thankfully he was in a non-combatant role driving lorries transporting soldiers to boats headed for France. It’s where he learned he enjoyed driving! However in April 1917, Sidney was transferred to the Machine Gun Corps and eventually rose to the rank of sergeant where only 7 months later, his life would change forever.
During the battle of Passchendaele, one of the muddiest most gruelling segments of the war, Sidney was on the frontlines when a shell burst, sending a shrapnel fragment tearing diagonally through his nose and the right side of his face. The young soldier collapsed face first into the mud which ended up saving his life as falling backwards would have caused him to choke on his own blood. For three days Sidney laid in a mangled heap floating in and out of consciousness while vermin scurried about his body and the other dead and wounded around him. No one would ever know the details of those agonising three days, but the trauma he experienced there left him with a lifelong phobia of rats and cockroaches. After the initial wounded had been cleared out, a wandering band of stretcher bearers discovered Sidney alive after one man touched him with his boot fully expecting him to be dead. Miraculously, he was still clinging to life.
The 19 year old sergeant was rushed down the line and then transferred to two different military hospitals where his wounds were hastily stitched in an effort to save his life before infection could spread. Unfortunately, closing the gap where he was missing flesh in his cheek caused his upper lip to be pulled into a sneer and a sunken depression formed where most of his nose was missing around the bridge. Still, he was lucky to be alive, which he later used to remark. Well he was luckier still as he would be transferred to Sidcup military hospital in Kent where he would become a patient under Sir Harold Gillies, the man often considered the pioneer of modern plastic surgery. When he arrived at hospital in 1918, his wounds were healed but his face still bore the heavy trauma of his experience. If you want to see his photographs upon arrival, I won’t post them here but if you search his name, the photos are everywhere. IMO they’re not graphic but I know it can upset some people.
Gillies went to work trying to restore Sidney’s face. This required him to reopen the wound in his cheek where a skin flap was grafted to allow his upper lip to return to normal. He also folded down a skin flap from his forehead in order to create a new nose. Behind his facade, a series of tubes and canals had to be inserted for proper sinus drainage and other unnamed functions. While his initial handful of surgeries did most of the work to reconstruct his face, Sidney underwent over 40 surgeries between 1918 and the 1930s, some reconstructive and some to evacuate the tubes behind the flesh, meaning the common cold was a routinely painful affliction for him. Gillies understood operations were traumatic for the men at Sidcup, especially since most required more than one, and so made a point about creating a lighthearted ward environment, one Sidney says was quite jolly with the staff doing everything they could to make them feel comfortable and dignified as possible. And while I thought the topmost photos were the most updated case study photos for his recovery, I stumbled upon another set from 1920 in the Faces of War by Andrew Bamji I have not seen posted anywhere!
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And lads listen. In such a sweet little twist, while Sidney was still recovering from the bulk of his major surgeries, a local pianist by the name of Winifred volunteered to play for the resting servicemen, all of whom had some form of disfigurment or amputation. Carrying in her sheet music, she and Sidney laid eyes on each other for the first time and she later remarked how his smile instantly lit up the whole room! For them, it was love at first sight. The two were soon married, and although it was in the 1920s, I don’t have an exact year for this. This most likely came after Sidney was finally discharged from service in 1921. There is a photo of their wedding and y’all look how SWEET!!
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Between his initial surgeries and army discharge, Gillies asked if Sidney would be his personal chauffeur, an offer he took up quickly as he loved driving from his time with lorries during the war. One somewhat humorous account tells of Gillies—who was a bit scattered at times—asking Sidney to renew his driver’s license as the surgeon left it until the last day to take care of; Sidney in a rush waited in a long line at the county hall before jumping the queue and begging the administrator to expedite his employer’s license as it was needed to drive him to the hospital the next day. The man refused, even for a surgeon to get him to his patients. Sidney went to another staff member who was friends with Gillies and begged him the same. The man cheerily agreed but was still in need of a signature from the stubborn administrator who again refused... at least until he found out Harold Gillies nearly won a golfing championship, at which point he took Sidney to his personal office to expedite the license as he was happy to do business for a skilled golfer (apparently saving people’s lives doesn’t matter as much??). A no doubt perplexed Sidney was finally able to get back to the hospital on time!
After his army discharge and most likely about the time of his marriage, Sidney moved back to Cambridge where he worked for the council as a rent collector. He was so well liked, apparently even from the people he collected from, that he soon worked his way to Housing Manager for Cambridge. About this time, he had a daughter, Pam. Every account I read of him, people gush about how sweet he was. His wife recalls how Sidney was always adored by all his family and friends. His granddaughter Marilyn McInnes in an interview said, “He was the most warm and optimistic and loving man. I adored my grandfather, I was constantly on his lap as a small child. I never noticed anything funny about his face, I guess I thought all grandads looked like mine.”
Sadly, Sidney Beldam passed away from cancer at about 80 years old in 1978. But considering the man was given 6 months to live and ended up living for 60 years more surrounded by a large and loving family, I’d say he certainly had a full life. There is a picture of him and his wife in the 60s and they are absolutely charming!!
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But anyway that’s me done rambling I’ve a massive crush on him. His story makes me genuinely happy to tell and I’m so glad you asked!
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