#super general window ac

[acstoreindubai]

Super General SGS311NE Split Air Conditioner 2.5 Ton: Ultimate Cooling Solution for Your Home

In today's rapidly evolving world, ensuring the comfort and well-being of your household is a top priority. As temperatures soar and seasons shift, a reliable air conditioning system becomes indispensable. The Super General SGS311NE Split Air Conditioner 2.5 Ton is designed to meet these needs, providing an unparalleled cooling experience tailored to your home environment. In this comprehensive guide, we delve into why this model stands out among its competitors and why it could be the ideal choice for your cooling needs.

Unmatched Cooling Efficiency

The Super General SGS311NE is engineered to deliver superior cooling performance, thanks to its 2.5-ton capacity. This powerful unit can effectively cool large spaces, making it perfect for living rooms, large bedrooms, or even office spaces. The split design ensures that the unit operates quietly, allowing you to enjoy a peaceful environment without the constant hum of a traditional air conditioner. With a high-efficiency rotary compressor, this model ensures rapid cooling, even in the peak of summer, providing immediate relief from scorching temperatures.

Energy-Efficient Operation

In an era where energy conservation is crucial, the Super General SGS311NE does not disappoint. It features an energy-efficient compressor that significantly reduces power consumption, making it a sustainable choice for environmentally conscious consumers. The unit has been awarded a 5-star energy rating, ensuring that you can enjoy optimal cooling without worrying about skyrocketing electricity bills. This combination of powerful performance and energy efficiency sets the SGS311NE apart from its competitors.

Advanced Features for Enhanced Comfort

The Super General SGS311NE Split Air Conditioner comes equipped with a range of advanced features that elevate its functionality:

Turbo Mode: This feature allows the air conditioner to operate at maximum speed, providing rapid cooling in record time. Ideal for those unbearably hot days when you need quick relief.

Sleep Mode: Designed to ensure a comfortable sleeping environment, Sleep Mode adjusts the temperature gradually throughout the night, preventing overcooling and reducing energy consumption.

Auto-Restart Function: In the event of a power outage, the SGS311NE will automatically resume operation with the previous settings, ensuring your comfort is maintained without any manual intervention.

Dehumidification Mode: The unit effectively removes excess moisture from the air, making your living space more comfortable and reducing the risk of mold and mildew growth.

Durability and Reliability

Built with high-quality materials and robust components, the Super General SGS311NE promises longevity and reliability. The unit is designed to withstand the rigors of continuous operation, even in challenging climates. The anti-corrosive gold fin coating on the condenser enhances durability by protecting against rust and corrosion, ensuring that your investment remains in top condition for years to come.

User-Friendly Design

The SGS311NE features a sleek and modern design that seamlessly integrates into any home decor. The easy-to-read digital display and intuitive remote control make it user-friendly, allowing you to adjust settings with ease. The unit also includes a 24-hour timer, enabling you to program your air conditioner to turn on or off at specific times, adding convenience to your daily routine.

Installation and Maintenance

Proper installation is crucial for optimal performance and longevity of any air conditioner. The Super General SGS311NE comes with a comprehensive installation kit and clear instructions, making the process straightforward for professionals. Regular maintenance, such as cleaning the filters and checking the refrigerant levels, will ensure the unit continues to operate efficiently and extend its lifespan.

Eco-Friendly Refrigerant

The SGS311NE uses the R410A refrigerant, which is environmentally friendly and does not contribute to ozone depletion. This makes the unit a responsible choice for those looking to reduce their environmental impact while enjoying the benefits of a high-performance air conditioner.

Affordability and Value for Money

Despite its advanced features and robust performance, the Super General SGS311NE offers excellent value for money. Its competitive pricing makes it accessible to a wide range of consumers, while the long-term energy savings ensure that the initial investment pays off over time. When compared to other models in its class, the SGS311NE provides a compelling combination of affordability, performance, and efficiency.

Customer Reviews and Testimonials

Customers who have chosen the Super General SGS311NE are overwhelmingly positive about their experience. Users frequently highlight the unit's quick cooling capabilities, quiet operation, and energy efficiency. Many have noted a significant reduction in their electricity bills since switching to this model, making it a popular choice among budget-conscious homeowners.

Conclusion

The Super General SGS311NE Split Air Conditioner 2.5 Ton is more than just a cooling device; it's a comprehensive solution for creating a comfortable and energy-efficient living space. With its powerful cooling performance, advanced features, and eco-friendly design, this model stands out as one of the best options on the market for those seeking a reliable and efficient air conditioning system. Whether you're looking to cool a large room or enhance the overall comfort of your home, the SGS311NE is a worthy investment that delivers on all fronts.

[nothorses]

So I'm thinking of going on low dose T, and ofc I'll get more feedback from doctors when I see them, but I know one of the changes is that you run warmer and have lower heat tolerance, and I'm already kind of heat sensitive (sweating is a sensory ick). Do you or your followers have any kind of coping strategies that have helped with that?

I ran warm before, too, and I'm definitely warmer now! I also have Raynaud's which kind of makes the whole experience a clusterfuck, but that's besides the point. lmao.

I live in a pretty cool/temperate area, so it isn't normally an issue except in the (increasingly horrible) summers, but I've found that the hardest time to stay cool has been at night. I share a bed with my partner who runs even warmer, and it's been 2.5 years of struggling to figure out how to be a comfortable temperature together.

The best advice I can give you is to just stay as far away from synthetic fibers as you can; "sweat wicking" and "cooling" and "athletic" stuff included. It's a lie. They're all plastic, and while they might feel cool to the touch at first, plastic doesn't breathe. It'll trap heat and moisture against your skin after enough time, especially in the form of blankets. (Fuck the Rest Evercool. Worst recommendation I've ever gotten.)

Look for 100% linen, or 100% cotton. I've heard wool also works well, but I haven't had luck with that personally. Woven fabrics are going to be cooler and more breathable than sateen, and waffle weave is like, the single most breathable weave afaik (it's more common in blankets, but some clothes are waffle).

Some of these things can be pretty scratchy at first, and I recommend a couple of washes on a high heat & some fabric softener before you start using them. We were able to break in our waffle blanket super quickly this way! (I know some folks recommend against softener for breathability reasons, but it's the only thing that actually worked for us, and it hasn't impacted breathability). After you break them in, though, cotton and linen fabrics are SUPER soft!

I also recommend staying away from leather. It's natural, but trust me: it's not breathable. It's coveted in outdoor rec spaces BECAUSE it's somewhat waterproof.

Outside of that, I'd really encourage you to lean towards multiple light layers that you can change/remove throughout the day to suit your needs (ex: light tee + fleece + wind/rain layer, maybe throw in a flannel somewhere), instead of one or two heavy ones (ex: shirt + big puffy cold weather jacket). It's a strategy common in the PNW that works great for regulating your temperature when you're dealing with humidity and somewhat unpredictable weather, and imo, it also really translates if you're just generally sensitive to heat and sweat.

Outside of that... depending on where you live, I really recommend having an AC/dehumidifier. Don't bother with trying to rig up a swamp cooler if you're sensitive to sweat- the increased humidity will make things worse. The general advice I heard when researching a good AC was that window units will always be more efficient than portable units (and a mini split is better than either), but if you have to go with a portable unit, go with a dual-hose. They'll be more efficient just because they don't create a vacuum that pulls in warm air from outside. This is the model we settled on- it was really highly recommended and cost effective for what it is, and it's been absolutely fantastic this summer.

Idk how you are about pits, but I wash mine with a benzoyl body wash and then use a deodorant with antiperspirant every day, and I virtually never smell or sweat. 🤷‍♂️ ymmv though

I'm sure folks will have things to add, so check the notes on this post- and good luck!

[omegalomania]

What are some of your favorite aro-/ace-coded fob lyrics?

oh fuck yes a little bowl of seeds just for me

boycott love from disloyal order of water buffaloes is a personal favorite of mine. its a lyric i really really want tattooed at some point. that's not the only lyric i latch onto from an aro perspective but it's probably the biggest one

basically the entirety of it's hard to say "i do" when i don't but a special mention goes to you are appealing to emotions that i simply do not have as well as the only ring i want buried with me are the ones around my eyes

it's true romance is dead / i shot it in the chest and in the head from the music or the misery is also a favorite of mine, also just that whole song in general

i thought i loved you but it was just how you looked in the light in hum hallelujah resonates with a lot of queer folks i've found, and it's no different for me

same goes for it's a strange way of saying that i know i'm supposed to love you from g.i.n.a.s.f.s.

i'm outside the door, invite me in / so we can go back and play pretend from alone together brings me back to when i was trying to perform heteronormativity/amatonormativity even if it was making me miserable

i also hold to a very similar vibe with she said "i love you 'till i don't" / i am just playing house, no idea what i'm doing now from sunshine riptide and also most of burna boy's verse, frankly. i fell in love but i didn't fall down and feel like i'm bulletproof, baby in particular

american beauty/american psycho, particularly the first verse. i think i fell in love again / maybe i just took too much cough medicine

golden is a big one for queer folks in general i've found. the chorus especially hits hard from an aro and/or ace reading. and i saw god cry in the reflection of my enemies / and all the lovers with no time for me

i've got a dark alley and a bad idea that says you should shut your mouth is a heavy song no matter how you slice it. but that chorus gets to me in particular: we can fake it for the airwaves / force our smiles, baby, half-dead / from comparing myself to everyone else around me

the kids aren't alright reads to me as one big anthem for platonic love above anything romantic, which resonates super hard with me. the second verse has a lot of good lines that i latch onto from an aroace lens too. your love is anemic and i can't believe / that you couldn't see it coming from me

pretty much the whole chorus of HOLD ME TIGHT OR DON'T does it for me, and those verses have got some good aroallo vibes too! i never really feel a thing... confidants but never friends...

the whole of fake out is a gimme. that chorus rings real true. starts with love is in the air, i just gotta find a window to break out and finishing with but it was all a fake-out

i've got all this ringing in my ears and none on my fingers is one that has another highly applicable title but the whole refrain of the truth hurts worse / than anything i could bring myself to do to you paired with the one-two punch of that second verse REALLY gets under my skin

and of course, the culminating one: you are what you love, not who loves you from save rock and roll. obviously there are a LOT of ways to read that line

there are a couple other songs i latch onto - wilson (expensive mistakes); a little less "sixteen candles", a little more "touch me"; the (after) life of the party to name a few - but the ones listed above are the big lyrics that resonate with me on a personal level

just in general i have a shitton of fob over on my aro playlist (which doubles as a general aroace/queer playlist but has a lot of emphasis on aromanticism) in case i forgot to mention anything but like i said those are the big ones

[heythrrdelilah]

timmy Timmy Timmy Timmy! Everithing about this lovable man

This man actually owns me. He’s #1 on my list and will forever be. So please request more Timmy y’all 🤣 I haven���t written smut in forever so please be mindful of that when reading.

Warnings: 18+ minors DNI, oral manipulations, sex

Pairings: Timothée Chalamet x F!Reader

Neighbors

The sound of bustling New York traffic filled your small studio apartment as you lay in your bed. You had a particularly rough day at work and you were wanting nothing more than to lay in your dark apartment, binge watch Love Island while you mindlessly scroll on your phone. Your air conditioning in your apartment went out a week ago so the window behind your bed had been open in an attempt of temporarily relieving some of the heat. The busy New York streets have become your sleep ambiance.

In the middle of the re-coupling of the episode you were watching, your finger stumbled upon your dating app folder in your phone. You were scrolling on Instagram before, but something in the Love Island air had you wanting to use Hinge like it was a phone game. You were never looking for anything serious, or anything in general. You never messaged your matches back. It was more like you had the apps for the option.

Scrolling to pass the time, you stopped on one profile that seemed a bit too familiar. The man had curly dark hair that fell over his face. In most of his pictures, his phone covered the majority of his chiseled features but showed his green eyes. It wasn’t until you looked at the name that it struck you where you knew him from. He lived next door to you, well across the hall. He was attractive, tall and lean. You’d never spoken before, just saw each other in passing, he probably hadn’t ever actually seen you before if you really thought about it. You still felt like you couldn’t swipe on him. The likely hood of you matching would probably be impossible, but in the off chance you did match, you lived right across from each other. You’d have to see him every day. If you matched and ignored it like all of your other matches, there would still be the lingering of the known fact you at least find him attractive.

In the deep thought, the show got good and you lay your phone down for a moment, allowing yourself to give your brain a break to dive into the drama of the show. When you looked back down at your phone you saw a giant ‘MATCHED’ across your phone screen. You must have accidentally swiped while putting your phone down. Your heart paused for a second and your eyes widened. The next notification across the screen was a message. He had already messaged you.

Timothée: hey neighbor.

That was it? What were you supposed to respond to that? You tossed your phone to the side and continued to watch the show again until your phone buzzed again.

Timothée: is your AC out too?

Is that why he matched with you? To see if your apartment was in the same condition as his? You could only find out one way.

You: yeah. I talked to the super last week but he just said he would get to it when he gets to it. Glad to know im not the only one.

An hour had passed and no response, so you assumed that had been exactly what he wanted, to ask about your AC. You were on your third episode into the binge when your phone buzzed again.

Timothée: I have a window unit but I have some extra fans. I’ll come bring you one if you need one. This summer is hot as fuck

You rolled your eyes as if it was habit. You’d be crazy to accept. Because he just wanted to know about your ac, but you obviously found him attractive and he knew it because you matched with him. His was information based, yours was attraction based, how embarrassing.

You didn’t respond. You turned your alarm for the morning on, just in case you fell asleep and continued watching your show.

Until a knock came at your apartment door. You huffed out a sigh and flung your legs off the side of the bed. The oversized shirt covering your shorts but you didn’t care. It was one in the morning and whoever it was, didn’t need to be knocking anyways. You opened the door and saw the curly haired man standing in a white t-shirt, black shorts, sneakers, holding a white oscillating fan.

He smirked down at you, “you didn’t answer so I brought it over anyways.” His voice was low and raspy. It added to his attraction. You felt suddenly aware of your messy appearance. “Thank you. I can return it to you when they fix it,” you reached for the fan but he pulled it back. “I can bring it in for you. It’s heavy and the button is finicky,” he informed. You moved to the side and let him in. You pointed to the bed area, “there would be great.”

“You swiped on me. Was it weird knowing I’m your neighbor?” He asked as he plugged the fan in. You turned bright red. When you didn’t respond, he broke the silence, “I am only asking because I swiped on you weeks ago. When you moved in? I told my buddy how beautiful you were.” Your heart was beating fast and you were definitely bright red at this point. “Really?” You asked, too nervous to tell him you basically told your best friend he was hot when you moved in. He nods and looks over at you, his eyes looking slowly from your feet to your head. You managed to find the courage, “I told my best friend basically the same.” He took a step towards you and now there was just inches between you.

He looked down at you, you up at him. The tension was rising. “The fan definitely is helping in here already. It feels cooler,” you croaked out, not breaking eye contact. He smirked, “let’s use the cool air to our advantage and make it hot again?” In that moment he leaned down and his lips met yours. You allowed yourself to sink into the kiss. His hand was on the back of your head, moving your head with his. His other hand was on the small of your back ever so gently. You placed both of your hands on his chest and gripped his shirt to pull him closer. The two of you stumbled back and fell to your bed.

Your hands moved to grasp his hair as his kisses went down your neck, his hands up your shirt gripping your breasts. You pushed him up so that you were in a sitting position. You slipped your shirt off to expose your breasts completely. He kicked his lips in his smirk, throwing his head back and groaning “fuck” before taking his own shirt off and laying back over you. His lips pressed against yours once again and his left hand trailed from the center of your chest, his middle finger just barely grazing your skin, down your shorts and circled your clit slow and gentle.

You instinctively clenched your thighs but he backed away from the kiss and used both of his hands to remove your shorts and push open your legs. He knelt down beside the edge of the bed, gripped your thighs, and pulled you to where you were placed perfectly at the edge. He placed his head between your thighs and began working his tongue and finger in unison. You wiggled and flexed your thighs, arching your back in pleasure. When you couldn’t take it anymore, you moaned out a simple demand, “fuck me.” He looked up grinning at you wickedly, “all you have to do is ask politely.” You looked back at him with pleading eyes and used the sweetest voice you had, “please fuck me.”

He removed his shorts and boxers quickly, grabbing his condom from his shorts showing that he had this planned all along and the fan was most likely just an excuse. A helpful excuse. He lined himself up and slowly inserted himself. He was being a tease. He thrust slowly until you were begging for more.

Six positions and 45 minutes later, you were both lying on your bed, out of breath, listening to the noises of New York. “Nice to finally meet you, neighbor,” he chuckled wrapping an arm around you. You nudged his side jokingly, “likewise,neighbor.”

[paullovescomics]

DC round-up for this week! I did not get Absolute Superman because it was already sold out when I got to the comic shop. It was noon or even slightly early, but it was still sold out. So i'll have to wait for the next printing.

Batgirl #1 is a solid start. Lady Shiva shows up in Gotham to tell Batgirl that some evil super ninjas are out to kill them, and they need to work together to survive. Cass is understandably reticent about teaming up with her evil mom. They have a well written back-and-forth about it. Batgirl's taciturn nature is conveyed very well. Mom and daughter are at an impasse, but nothing ends an argument like a bunch of sword-wielding mfers crashing through the window. This was very good. The characters are on point. The fight scenes are exactly what you want in a martial arts inspired superhero comic. I first noticed Takeshi Miyazawa's art like twenty years ago when it was much more manga-like. That influence is still there, but the line weights and types are a lot more varied now. Poses, storytelling, and facial expressions are excellent.

Birds of Prey #15 also prominently features Batgirl. She's undercover here, infiltrating an evil company that has abducted several Amazons. Things don't go well for Cass' mission, but she badasses her way through it. There's a line where Black Canary says that Cass is everyone's favorite in every scenario, and I was like, you're fucking right she is. All of the character stuff in this issue is aces. Barda's big lovable violent scary self, Dinah showing top tier leadership chops, Onyx and Grace's instant camaraderie, all great. Onyx is a cool deep cut. I don't know if she's shown up somewhere else recently, but it's cool to see her featured more prominently. The villains in this arc are well done, too. They are smarmy and full of shit in a very big corporate way that rings true. You really want to see them get what's coming to them. Heels are hard to book in 2024, so congrats to Kelly Thompson for that. Consistently one of the comics I most enjoy.

JSA #1 -- I wasn't sure if I'd dig this one or not, but I did. The mix of generations is not new to Justice Society series, but the inclusion of the Infinity, Inc. versions of Wildcat and Doctor Mid-Nite is very welcome. Those two should have been back a long time ago. Plot-wise, this hits the ground running. Many members of the team are missing or in the hospital after a mysterious attack. It's unclear whether this happened in some earlier comic (maybe in the Absolute Power event?) or if the story is just being very in media res about things. Regardless, it wasn't hard to follow. There's a good opportunity here for some of these characters to get more fleshed out, contemporary character development. The team is having a lot of conflict, some of which might seem a bit too ordinary, except that it's due to an imposter in their midst. The last page is out here on tumblr, but I won't give away the details. I'll just say that a conspiracy of villains that is several steps ahead of the good guys is a trope that I will always pop for. Don't believe I've seen artist Diego Olortegui's work before, but I like it. All of the characters look great, the faces are very expressive, everything is clearly told, and dude does not skimp on the backgrounds. Loads of cool stuff here.

I also picked up Jamie McKelvie's One For Sorrow #1, but I haven't read it yet. It looks very cool.

[hopefulnightlady]

NSFW 141 Headcanonns three, away with ye (if minor)

(gender neutral)

First Post (price): here

Second Post(Soap): here

Third post (Ghost): here

───･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☾.* :☆ﾟ.─────･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ.───

───･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☾.* :☆ﾟ.─────･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ.───

This is baisically me giggling and kicking my feet at Gaz for... some amount of words. Y'all better give this one just as many notes as the other ones, otherwise I straight up won't post the Ghost one, which is by far the most fun I made imo. Because fuck this fandom's constant disregard for my boy Gaz. Anyways, have fun!

───･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☾.* :☆ﾟ.─────･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ.───

───･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☾.* :☆ﾟ.─────･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ.───

As always, mild spice under the cut (this ones really wholesome tbh)

Immaculate taste in partners (VERY bisexual. at least)

Also great taste in kink

would try most things once, more of an Experimentalist than super focused on one thing

If his partner wasn't so happy with an idea he had/something he wanted to try/didn't like something they did try together, he'd be SO chill about it

like beyond only respecting their needs over his wants, he wouldn't even have a hint of second thought about it

"do we both like it? no? out the window with it"

this would abseloutly go for ALL sexual acts i think he'd be incredibly chill if he had a s/o who was ace

or uncomfortable with certain 'vanilla' acts such as penetration/oral.

Or simply had a lower libido, anything like that

OH YES. HE'S PEAK SWITCH (everyone is unless proven otherwise)

As i said, he has good taste.

So femdom is on the list (/j ahahaha unless...)

I feel like he'd enjoy that, espechially like 'basic' kink stuff like rope or impact play where he doesn't have to think for a little while

Open to everything as I mentioned but more of a masochist than sadistic

Generally as i said anything goes as long as its safe sane consensual

As a dom he'd be very responsible (not that i think the others wouldn't, i just feel he's the most emotionally intelligent)

generally just very healing to be with if you've had bad experiences. Not because he actively does anything, but because he's one of those people who prove things can be better

Aftercare:

Aftercare is total (non gendered) princess treatment for him. If you try to do ANYTHING, he'll actually vibrate out of his skin, especially if he was domming during a scene

You'd probably have to fight to get to take care of him at all

All the standard stuff, cleanup, cuddling etc. PlusI feel like he'd be big on hand-feeding and bathing/showering together as aftercare activities, that kinda stuff

Bye bye:

───･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☾.* :☆ﾟ.─────･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ.───

───･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☾.* :☆ﾟ.─────･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ.───

[copperbadge]

I'm one week into not having any AC for three weeks and I feel like shit's about to get real interesting.

On the plus, the changes I'm making are working -- last night's five hours of sleep was thanks to a portable air conditioner (really just a misting fan but it's working well when aimed directly at me) and being able to open a window in the bedroom.

The cats are still acclimating; Deebs generally doesn't sleep on the bed except in winter, but now she's sleeping deep in the closet where the evil fan can't get her. Polk meanwhile usually sleeps tucked between my chest and a body pillow, but she sleeps on top of the duvet so she can make biscuits to her heart's content. Since I'm sleeping without blankets or a shirt, she's super restless and doesn't want to settle, and when she does she kneads her claws directly into me. I also can't open the windows too wide, because I'm terrified Polk's going to do one of her acrobatic scentmarking flips, take out the screen, and fall to her doom, so the window is only open more than a crack when I'm in the room and alert enough to shoo her away when she gets too close to the window.

I think tonight might be an occasion for either a weed edible or some Nyquil. At least the temperature is going to be lower for most of today.

[ID: A screengrab of my fitbit's sleep chart, showing that I have slept a total of about 14 hours of sleep total since Monday, generally 2-3 restless hours at a time, with five hours last night.]

[rumlnated]

regarding USAmericans and consumption/climate change though

something something womanhood capitalism something

[fishuus]

hi!! Your art is incredible and awesome... not sure how to say it otherwise but it's super tasty looking lol 🫶

I was wondering if you have ever posted what brushes do you use ? I am always on the lookout for nice brushes! Also if you've got any tips for inking, I'd appreciate it enormously. No worries if not! 💕

hi, thanks so much!

i mostly just use whatever defaults came with clip studio paint. for inking, my go-to is the the default marker pen brush (under the marker tab in pens), but sometimes i'll swap to the calligraphy one (should be in the pen tab), or this brush but with the pen pressure turned off. just depends on how i'm feeling about whatever i'm inking. when i want to add some texturing when toning, i use stuff like the spray or diagonal line brushes (again, should be included in CSP), i just make an eraser version of them so i can also use them on layer masks.

as for inking tips ... i don't have any hard and fast "always do x for y" advice but i rambled a little about how i approach it.

this first point is actually pretty straightforward, it's just to look at inking techniques by artists you like, think about what makes them work so well in their context, and try them out for yourself. this isn't about plagiarizing art styles but more about understanding how other artists choose to stylize certain things in their work, and seeing what works and what doesn't for you personally. sometimes it's through looking at other people's stylizations that you get a better understanding of how you want to approach translating this actual 3d object (people, clothes, background details, whatever) into your own art as well. as you try out various techniques, maybe you find that some of them work well with your own style, and some of them don't and you stop incorporating those. it's all a constant work in progress. over time you can adjust how you use them in a way that fits your own drawing methods and workflows and they just start to come more naturally to you. of course, they may and should change a lot along the way because now it's something that's part of your own style. work on developing a good eye for these things and be thoughtful about what you want to convey and how.

just as an example, daiya no ace by terajima yuji definitely has to be up there for me in terms of influences, the way he approached body lines and clothing folds as a way to convey movement and posing made a lightbulb turn on in my head back when i was still reading it.

not a comprehensive list, but other manga i just like looking at off the top of my head - rookies (morita masanori), anything by yamashita tomoko but i really recommend the night beyond the tricornered window for something that's easily accessible, anything by asada nemui (please check for content warnings for their works first though!), all-rounder meguru (endo hiroki), urasawa naoki's works, dungeon meshi (kui ryoko), witch hat atelier (shirahama kamome), yotsuba&! (azuma kiyohiko), a bride's story (mori kaoru), i recollect love (moegi yukue), the later works of tojitsuki hajime (unfortunately a lot of is now out of print and not accessible online but i managed to get all their books bc their commitment to crosshatching shaved heads each time impressed me so much LMAOSJDsd) etc, etc.

this second thing is much vaguer and harder to quantify but ... honestly just draw a lot and see what feels good to your hand. inking and art styles in general are fluid things. so much of what inking comes down to, to me, is just drawing the lines that in a way that feels good to me. that only really comes from doing it a lot (not saying i'm a hardcore artist or anything lol just that i've been drawing on and off for a while now) and, well, getting a sense of what you like doing. sometimes you might look at a detail you finished that looks really good but feels like a happy accident, and it kinda is, but it's also just as much of the things you've internalized over time. combining the first point (developing your eye and a sense of thoughtfulness about inking) and the second (getting experience through developing your muscle memory) is basically it.

idk if any of this made sense lol but hope some of it helps!!!!!

[wheelsgoroundincircles]

Repo Man – Chevy Malibu

Alex Cox’s Repo Man is one weird, satirical ‘80s classic. That it centers on car repossession (in addition to government conspiracies, rampant criminality, and radioactive alien corpses) makes it a car movie, of sorts. A lot of cars get broken into, stolen, and repossessed over the course of the film, but the most important car plot-wise is a beige Chevy Malibu driven by a sweaty, one-eyed mad scientist. What makes this Malibu one of the worst cars in movie history? For one, it is super hot inside even with the windows down and AC cranked up. And two, the decaying alien corpses in the trunk are so radioactive that anyone unfortunate enough to open the back end is instantly fried to powder, leaving nothing but a pair of smoldering shoes to tell the tale. For the final scene, the car was painted in 3M reflective paint (at $600 a can!) and hit with spotlights to give it that ghostly glow.

Maximum Overdrive – Happy Toyz Semi

It turns out Emilo Esteves has a knack for appearing in bad car movies as he followed up Repo Man by starring in Stephen King’s Maximum Overdrive. Tired of Hollywood directors butchering his ideas, King directed the movie himself (his first and last attempt at directing). Maximum Overdrive kicks off a consistent theme on this list: killer cars. The premise is hokey and never actually scary (seriously, 1974’s Killdozer is about a killer bulldozer that stalks its victims at 5 mph). In the case of Maximum Overdrive, it isn’t just cars, but all mechanical objects become possessed and homicidal, including one very grumpy toaster. A marauding group of killer semis is led by a Happy Toyz truck with a big fiberglass Green Goblin face on the radiator. Why Marvel’s Green Goblin? We’d ask Stephen King, but the author says he was drinking too much at the time to remember much of anything about the filming.

The Car – Lincoln Continental Mk III

Within the genre of killer cars, The Car ranks … among them. This low budget 1977 horror flick stars James Brolin as Deputy Wade Parent and a very dower looking 1971 Lincoln Continental Mk III. The car of The Car (inventive title, no?) is barely recognizable as a Lincoln thanks to extensive custom work by George Barris, famed customizer of the Hirohata Merc and the 1960s TV Batmobile. Barris added a high belt line, blacked out windows to match a black paint job, massive fenders, and a lowered roof line that gives the car a menacing glower. But rather than scary, the car of The Car ends up looking as corny as the movie’s dialogue, earning it a spot on our list.

Jeepers Creepers – Chevy COE

Far scarier than a possessed car is a car driven by a people-eating demon as seen in Jeepers Creepers. The grim rust bucket in question is a 1941 Chevy cab-over-engine (COE) with a blaring horn and a gnarly cowcatcher used to ram unsuspecting motorists off the road. This being the horror genre, there’s a little bit of tongue-in-cheek humor with the addition of a vanity license plate that reads BEATNU. The Creeper’s Chevy COE is simultaneously one of the best scary movies cars of all time and one of the worst cars to see in your review mirror.

Corvette Summer – C3 Corvette

In between iconic performances in Star Wars and The Empire Strikes Back Mark Hamill starred in a little movie called Corvette Summer. The “adventure comedy,” as it was billed, follows a California teenager as he travels to Las Vegas in search of his stolen customized Corvette. Like many custom cars, the Corvette in question has clearly been an ambitious labor of love that got wildly out of control. The elaborate customization included a fiberglass nose shell, candy red paint with flame decals, side pipe exhaust, and a custom rear end with a large Chevy bowtie logo brake light. The car’s custom clamshell hood arrived before the feature debuted on the next-generation (fourth) Corvette. The car was also swapped from left hand to right hand drive to make it easier for the ladies’ man Hamill to chat up girls on the sidewalk while cruising. It boggles the mind how anyone could get a date driving this Hot Wheels-in-real-life monstrosity, but hey, the ‘70s were a weird time.

Dumb and Dumber – Mutts Cutts Van

In Dumb and Dumber, Harry (Jeff Daniels) and Lloyd (Jim Carey) travel from Rhode Island to Aspen, Colorado to deliver a “lost” briefcase. A good many of the miles are covered in Harry’s Ford Ecoline panel van customized for his work as a dog groomer. Like all committed dog groomers, Harry fitted his car with end-to-end shag carpeting, a nose, mouth (with tongue), ears, legs, and a tail. And that isn’t even the extent of the Mutts Cutts van, it also includes free samples of the most annoying sound in the world, plenty bottles of warm “beer,” and $200 car alarm. The duo ends up out of gas and desperate enough to trade the van for a minibike aka the perfect mode of transport for high-elevation mountain travel. What makes this one of the worst movie cars of all time? Just image the smell once you take it through the car wash…

[4e7her]

Hi! Super sorry for a request on a day like this! I just really enjoy your yandere content(your content in general, really) and wanted to attempt to make an ask. I was wondering if you could do a Yandere Ace with a reader/Mc who either is blissfully unaware or is okay with Ace’s yandere antics? Honestly I’d love this for absolutely any character and I’m sure I’ll end up requesting this for a different one again, but I’ll stop here-

Even if you don’t get around to it, thank you! I love your work.

hi! this came out kind of short but i hope you enjoy still!

-

character: ace trappola, twst

contains: yandere, reader referred to in second person pov, gender neutral reader

Ace couldn’t believe how lucky he was.

It was enough that he meant you, a living deity - one that he swore himself to in his own way. But the way you didn’t even mind… it only reassured him that you were absolutely perfect.

“I’m takin’ some of your clothes.”

He announced strongly, after following you home to Ramshackle, a boyish grin appearing on his face when you simply… moved out of the way and directed him to your room.

Not like he didn’t know where it was already, after many nights of sneaking through your window, but the gesture was appreciated nonetheless.

When he returned from rummaging through your laundry, his bag was stuffed but there was no other such evidence of his activities, especially as he walked to the kitchen and draped himself over your back, humming and peeking over you to see what you were doing.

“Dinner? Ya spoil me, darlin’.” Ace hummed in content, nuzzling into the crook of your neck and laughing when you squirmed as his breath fell across your skin.

It was just another perfect day, with his perfect love.

He really couldn’t be any luckier.

-

[click here to go to masterlist]

[tenpintsof-sundrop]

i really feel you on the heat exhaustion in the summer and losing weight, i have it too. in my case i cannot regulate my internal body temperature due to medical issues so i'm always a human furnace and it makes summer awful to endure. i'll end up drinking a lot of flavoured water, eating yogurts and sandwiches with varied fillings etc and never anything hot. not even coffee, it's all iced coffee until like mid-october.

that being said, from one human furnace to another, do you have any tips to stay cool, especially for someone with no ac? i tend to drink ice water and have the "damp flannel in the freezer for 15 minutes on the neck" thing as well as cold showers, but do you suggest anything else?

Oh god the summer is tough for those of us who don't have AC and have medical conditions. You have said some good stuff here, but I can provide some tips of my own

Sugary drinks. Everyone is terrified of soda in this day and age, but I find it's actually a useful tool with chronic illness - and one of the main reasons I haven't lost more weight. Drinking low calorie or 0 calorie vitamin water is good, but sometimes it's good to drink liquids with higher calorie content in them. You get hydration and you can make up for calories that you miss during meals if you have to skip meals due to heat induced nausea. Liquid is always easier to ingest past nausea. And this goes for soda, juice, and even ice cold smoothies.

Ice. Ice, ice, ice. This may seem super basic, but I have to press it home. Buy one or two silicone ice trays on Amazon and always keep them full in your freezer, or invest in an electrical ice maker (this would be something to put on your Christmas list and ask for as a gift - the one my mom got for me and my sister was $160 on sale, so you can look out for sales too) - but having ice cubes in drinks makes a huge difference. Even putting ice cubes on your skin makes a huge difference when your body doesn't regulate heat normally.

Double walled tumblers. This is paired with ice. I know the Stanley trend seems stupid, and I don't even like Stanleys - I fucking hate the concept of paying $200 for a water bottle. The ones I use are $5 or $10 from Walmart - but make sure the one you buy is double walled and marked as insulated. This is proven effective to make cold drinks last for longer. So when you are exhausted from the heat, you don't have to keep getting up to refresh your drink and put more ice cubes. And it helps your drink stay cold from start to finish, helping your body temperature stay even a little bit lower.

Cold showers or baths. Again, this is kind of basic (and something said, but I am making a general list) - just be careful because if your medical condition means that you can't regulate body temperature, then exposing yourself to water that is too cold could make you sicker. The water should be tepid - room temperature, or slightly cool. And don't stay in for too long. Set a timer and listen to your body.

Putting cold items - cold cloths, ice packs, etc. - on target areas. There are target areas where coldness on your skin is more effective: the back of your neck, the top of your head, and your spine. This targets your central nervous system and helps you get cooler faster.

Air circulation. Again, this one might seem obvious, but I thought I would say it. Being a hot stuffy room is bad, so opening up windows and using fans to circulate air - even if it's warm air - is better than sitting in a room that is basically working as an oven toward your body. Also keep in mind that air needs a path to flow - if you open a window in your bedroom, open your bedroom door and a window in another room to help the air flow. You might be surprised what a difference this makes. Also, even if it's hot outside, it will likely be hotter inside your house if there is no air flow in your house.

Pet cooling pads. They sell relatively cheap cooling pads for dogs and cats (we got one for my cat at the dollar store) and sometimes I randomly sit on it even though it's for my cat. I recommend getting one of these to sit on or keep inside your pillow case to make sleeping easier.

I keep thinking of many other basic things: light clothing/minimal clothing, lack of activity, eating cold food (like popsicles), stick your head in the freezer...

Watch the movie Frozen and pretend that you are in the icy Arendelle summer?

[ikoraswife]

ok so here’s some things that I noticed in the first vidoc!

I haven’t been super active online so if someone else already talked about these, I haven’t seen it lol

(pics & observations below the cut)

The witness house

So obviously I noticed this creepy ass Witness-cottage in the video, but i also noticed that in this clip of zavala, he appears to be in front of the visible window of the house.

This is where he says “I used to think I’d give anything to bring you back”, and while I think he’s probably talking to Cayde it could also be Hakim/Safiyah.

The reason I think it could be them is because that little house has somewhat of a resemblance to Zavalas house when he lived with Safiyah. (Of course it could also just be some generic house lol)

Hand Temple & Zavala

So in one of the scenes in the vidoc they show this weird structure with a giant hand on the top, and something that was immediately obvious to me was that it’s COVERED in darkness statues

I counted 5, but there definitely could be more

“But ikoraswife, what’s that circled in green?”

Taking a closer look at it, it looks like it may be Zavala standing in front of the temple, but it could also just be some random structure since it’s small/blurry.

You can sort of make out his red armor, his shiny blue head, and his titan mark, but other than that it’s unclear.

Something else that points to the potential of this being Zavala is this scene that shows right before it pans to the temple:

That’s not just any ghost hovering there, thats Targe, Zavalas ghost

(here’s a pic from the Season of the Chosen for reference)

Now it’s extremely odd that Targe is with Ikora and co when he should be with his guardian. Why is he? Honestly I don’t know, maybe somethings wrong with Zavala.

Geez I’m just realizing how much of this is about Zavala

Crow Golden Gun and Injured Vanguard

In the iconic scene of Crow firing his golden gun inside of a pyramid structure, there’s a couple grams at the beginning where a figure rushes past him.

That’s Ikora and Zavala! One of them is supporting the other, (I think Ikora is supporting Zavala) and they’re quickly moving past him.

We actually saw the other half of this scene earlier in the gameplay trailer, in the scene where Cayde shoots his gun back toward the camera

Honorable mentions

This cute cutscene of the boy and the guardian/ghost is also in the gameplay trailer!

(Vidoc)

(Gameplay Trailer)

Then there's what appears to be the creation of the ghosts! I can't tell if that's that traveler below them or Earth, but I think it's safe to assume that it is the traveler.

After that, there are these two horrifying images of a dead ghost in a Generalist Shell and the broken Ace of Spades.

(ghost)

(Ace)

Important note: the gun appears to be broken in the same places that have glowing cracks in the other cutscenes.

Also! I have no idea what this is <3

Something else

Remember that disgusting arm ribcage thing? Still no clue what it is, but in the new cutscene where Crow goes into the Traveler, it pulses with light and makes what I think is the same noise that the ribcage creature makes in the reveal trailer.

Disclaimer: usually the stuff from the reveal trailers isn't actually in the game/expansion, so this could just be nothing or entirely unrelated.

Anyway this was a super long post, so thank you for dealing with my ramblings if you made it to the end!

[merely-a-caricature]

Happy Asexual Spectrum Awareness (Ace) Week!

Ace week has started! Asexual awareness week takes place during the last full week of October, and will be taking place in this wonderful year of 2023 from October 22-28! I will be linking my sources at the end if you want to check them out and get extra info!

Ace Week is a time for us in the community to focus on all things asexual! Part of this involves campaigning for a greater understanding and acceptance of ALL of those in the ace-spec! It’s also a time to reflect on how far we’ve come as a community!

Now, since been talking about asexual it’s and awareness, but what exactly does it mean to be asexual?

Some who is asexual (shortened ace) experiences little to no sexual attraction, and what attraction is felt may be expedience in a way that is different from the norm. Asexuality is an umbrella term used for those on the asexual spectrum (or ace-spec). Being asexual may mean you’re not interested in sex, it may be that your repulsed my the idea of sex, but it could also mean you feels disconnect from sex. There a multitude of reasons why some may identify as asexual. One reason why someone may be asexual is because they have a low sex drive/libido

Being asexual is not the same as having a low sex drive or libido. Someone who is celibate may not have sex but still feel sexual attraction or have a high libido but not act in those desire for various reasons. Sexual attraction is not the same as a sex drive. Sexual attraction is wanted to perform sexual acts with a specific person or gender whereas libido is defined as sexual desire. What is meant by sexual desire is essentially a physiological response in which one gets aroused. Just because a person gets aroused does not necessarily mean they want to have sex either. It can simply be a response from your body due to hormones or other things without any of the psychological desire for sexual acts.

Sex drive is one’s general “appetite” for sex in general, not a specific person like with sexual attraction. Bottom line is, asexuals may have a sex drive, they may experience physiological arousal, but they rarely if ever experience the attraction to a specific person to want to have sex.

Although asexual people may not experience sexual attraction, they can most certainly experience other types of attraction like romantic or aesthetic attraction. For example, you can be a heteroromantic-asexual, or a homoromantic-asexual, and so on and so forth. I won’t get super in-depth here, but I can link some stuff about the Split-Attraction-Model (SAM) if you want to learn more. I just also want to mention not every asexual (or aromantic) person uses or likes the SAM. Personally, I find it helpful, but you can also chuck it out a window if if you want

Additionally, there are various cultural and personal attitudes asexuals may have towards sex. I have made post about the cultural attitudes towards sex and the personal attitudes towards sex respectively. As an example, I would say I am sex-ambivalent and sex-neutral personally. If you want to know what that means, read my posts or check out some resources I have linked at the end

Asexuality is a spectrum. Some people, like me, experience no sexual attraction. Other aces may experience attraction on occasion or in certain circumstances, like demisexuals who only experience sexual attraction after forming a strong emotional connection with someone. People who experience sexual attraction infrequently may be called graysexual . There are many microlabels out there, and it’s a personal choice whether or not to use them

I have the sources I used and some more resources linked if that interests you, and you can, of course, do some of your own more in-depth research! I would highly recommend checking out the Asexuality Visibility and Education Network as they have a lot of good information, answers to questions, and you can finds links to forums and such!

Sources/Extra Resources

What is Ace Week

Asexual

Sexual Attraction vs Sexual Arousal

Split Attraction Model

Asexuality Visibility and Education Network

[underlust-but-like-acearo]

An attempt at a Lust Sans design. I'll be honest totally forgot that monster souls are upside down;; I had to flip his glasses, glowy eye and his boob (no boobs but yeah) window, cause at first I drew them as rightside-up hearts. Anyhow, like Frisk I have some general headcanons, like Sans is narcoleptic and also an insomniac cause I mean.. Look at him. I'm not sure if I'd headcanon every Sans as needing glasses, but seeing Lust with heart shaped glasses was so cute, I had to do it you know?? Also, idk I like chunky Sans so I think whenever Sans puts on a normal shirt he just has a stomach. Just ur usual cartoon shenanigans.

I've used he/him for Sans in the alt txt but idk I don't think I have any particular pronouns for them. Go wild, just so long as you're not being icky about it (I'm squinting at the people who seem to think Lust is a woman just because he's more sexual/flamboyant/whatever). Also, not pictured: white ring on one hand as an aro ring and a black ring on the other as an ace ring. Acearo hc babyyy, that's my bbg right there!! I think that's everything..

Oh, everything except, Lust is a mess just like me. He's wild he's a junkie and mentally ill and queer af and super fun but also his life is just a mess. He's flirty but doesn't push things, he's mostly just chill. He likes to drink and sob to himself and have his makeup run while listening to Taylor Swift or something. He's great. I love him.

[asbestos4president]

Hamuel Burger and the American Dream episode 3 Transcript

Episode title: Asbestos Saves Lives!

Asbestos (low energy, bored): … I am coming to you live from the floor, which I refuse to move from until somebody gives me attention. It has been ten days since we started the stream. The ship has moved approximately one American metre. The AC is broken. Abraham refuses to play "I Spy" with me anymore after losing the past seven games. Stanley is on strike until I learn to appreciate him not as a source of cheap labour but as the leading mixed media artist of his generation, which, of course, he communicated via a tear-jerking harmonica rendition of Dolly Parton's "Nine to Five". 

Chat: Are we there yet?

Asbestos: I spy with my little eye, something with a W.

Ham: If it's Worthless Earthling again, I'm turning this spaceship around. 

Asbestos: Fine. I spy with my little eye, something beginning with U. 

Ham: Useless human peasant?

Asbestos (genuinely impressed): Damn, you're good at this. Okay, your turn.

Ham: Could you please stop distracting me while I'm driving?

Asbestos : But I'm bored! This is boring! What's wrong with you, Abraham Nothingburger? You're sitting in a spaceship with an alien worrying about the traffic code. Does the excitement of having every galaxy in the universe at your literal fingertips pale in comparison to the myriad wonders of Bumfuck Nowhere, Idaho? What am I doing wrong?

Chat: I need to pee.

Asbestos: You should have gone before we left!

Chat: If I needed to go before we left, I would have gone before we left. Idiot.

Ham: That's it. If you don't know how to be nice to each other, I'm taking us all back to Idaho.

Asbestos: Wait wait wait wait no no no no! We can be quiet! We can be so quiet! 

Ham: Should have discovered that skill earlier! 

(Doing a bad Asbestos impression) 

Abraham, I'm bored. Make the ship do a barrel roll. Can't you go faster? No, go slower, I saw a cow out the window and I wanna get a picture! Never mind, it was just bigfoot. Haha, made you look! It's too hot in here. It's too cold in here! I ran out of snacks, can you get me some more? 

You're just lucky I'm not dropping you off on the side of the road and making you walk back to your home planet, you no-good-individual! 

[noise an engine shouldn't make]

Was that the engine? I think that was the engine. 

Asbestos: Everybody, stay calm. I have the situation under control. I'm sure you've all noticed this about me, but just for the viewers at home, I'm super masc and handsome and muscular and I totally look like someone who could fix an engine. I'll just use this… What is this?

Chat: That's a spoon.

Asbestos: Right. A screwdriver. I'll just use this screwdriver to, uh… What exactly is it for?

Chat: You use it to fry eggs.

Asbestos: Driving screws! Remarkable. So which end is for whisking and which end is for stapling?

Ham: The engine made a scary noise and we're all gonna die and I never got to say goodbye to my mum!

Asbestos: Don't be so dramatic. It's just a minor technical-

[another even more concerning spaceship noise]

The engine made a scary noise and we're all gonna die and I never got to say goodbye to my mom! Hold me, Abraham! Though we lived as bitter rivals, let us part as bosom friends!

Ham: I don't really want to be friends with anyone's bosom, if you don't mind! 

[harmonica]

What?

Asbestos: I'd like to spend my last moments of life thanking the sponsor of this channel, Gourd VPN. If you're like me, you're always having to parry pernicious pumpkin pirates, stab sinful squash stealers and murder malicious melon marauders. But what if I told you it didn't have to be this way? With Gourd VPN, you can protect your gourds from home without the need for high security vaults, armed bodyguards or begging for your life at knifepoint. That's not all! You can also use Gourd VPN to access varieties of gourd from all over the world, even when they don't usually grow in your climate. Want to grow cucumbers in drought season or bitter gourd in a snowstorm? Look no further than Gourd VPN for all your gourd-related needs. To grab this exclusive deal, just go to gourdvpn.com/asbestos4prez where you can get 0.05% off your three year subscription today. Gourd VPN: when there's a gourd, you're never bored! Terms and conditions apply. Ask your parents before going online. Why aren't we dead yet?

Ham: I have some good news and some bad news. The good news is those noises weren't the engine giving out. The bad news is that Stanley was keeping his homemade kombucha in your fridge and it just exploded everywhere. I found a mop, but it's made of steak. The fridge is also made of steak. Why is everything on your ship made of steak?

Asbestos: Look at that, Asbestos nation! Thanks to my powerful engineering skills, we didn't die! Can I get a W in the chat?

[chorus of Ls from chat]

Chat (diff voice): I still need to pee. 

Asbestos: Alright. We'll stop at the nearest town to recover from our near death experience. Most likely there will be a cafe we can visit. If the president's there, we can poison his soup! I love a good poisoning.

[cut to cafe]

Ham (on phone): Hey, mum! This is [bassoon sound effect]. I'm okay, I'm just at a diner with my friends.

[answering bassoon]

Stanley's here! You like Stanley!

[further bassoon]

Yes, they have gluten-free options.

[just unprecedented levels of bassoonery happening here]

No, I won't eat anything with potassium in it. Or olives. Or boiled plums. Or anything French. 

[bassoon]

Yes, I know goat liver is bad for your skin.

[irritated bassoon]

I'm sorry.

[scornful bassoon]

I'll definitely do it when I get home.

[disbelieving bassoon]

I know. I'm sorry.

[enquiring bassoon]

Hang on, I'll ask.

Asbestos, do you think you can drop me back home by five? It's really important.

Asbestos: Pass me the phone.

[glass smashing sound effect]

That's better!

Ham: Oh, my goodness gracious! For crying out loud, Asbestos Margaret Le Guin! What did you go and do that for?

Chat: Damn. He's so mad at you that he gave you a middle name! 

37. Asbestos

You should be thanking me. You know the government can track you on those things. I think I'll order the potassium, boiled plum, and goat liver special. Extra French, if you please.

Waitress: We're all outta French.

Asbestos: Belgian is fine.

Waitress: We're all outta Belgian!

Asbestos: Canadian?

Waitress: Don't come into my diner with your foul language!

Ham: Stanley, what are you planning on getting?

[harmonica noises]

Waitress: We're all outta [harmonica noises]!

Asbestos: Is there anything you do have?

Waitress: We can't afford ingredients because everyone's been paying us in political flyers!

Asbestos:  Let me see that!

(reading)

Bribera Berry for president 2024. A vote for Bribera is a vote to go in the draw to win one of five cars. 

How come I never thought of making pamphlets? No, too small. Posters. A billboard! Abraham, listen. I need my face plastered on every available surface. I need my name written in blinking lights 50 feet above the highway with a witty yet thought-provoking slogan such as "Asbestos Saves Lives!" or "Kids Love Asbestos!" I need to become the leading cause of traffic accidents in America because people were too busy looking at my sick sign to pay attention to the road!

Ham: I always got the impression you were too caught up in causing mass extinction events to ever show much interest in graphic design. 

Asbestos: You're right. Murder should have always been my priority, but I was distracted by the lure of political advertising, that sultry little minx. It may happen again. Now, where can we find this Barbara Barry? 

Waitress: She's doing a charity event to raise funds for the poor. I doubt they'll let you in.

Asbestos: Why not?

Waitress: It's only open to the very rich, the very famous and the very beautiful. You, on the other hand, are wearing a… What is that?

Asbestos (proudly): It's goth!

Waitress: It looks like a lung from an anti-smoking campaign. I didn't know those came in turquoise.

Asbestos: I got it on Temu! Me and my companions here are already the very famous and the very beautiful, but as for the very rich… Abraham! I need some fundraising solutions!

Ham: Start a lemonade stand. Found a pyramid scheme. Sell a few of your more redundant organs. Rob a bank. I don't care. Stanley, come with me. We're going home.

[scene change. they are outside now]

So that's the long and convoluted story of how I ended up working at this lemonade stand. Would you like a straw with that?

Passerby: Oh, I'm not buying. I was just making sure this here suspicious looking individual wasn't holding you hostage in violation of child labour laws and common human decency. 

Ham: I'm nineteen!

Passerby: Good job counting that high, kiddo. Are you sure you don't need me to call the police?

Asbestos: Lemonade! Lemonade! Come getcher ice cold legally acquired lemonade! Only fifty bucks a cup! Or more if you look like you have a lot of money. Hey, you! You're a sad and dehydrated individual. I'll give you half a lemon peel for the low low price of everything you've ever loved!

Passerby 2: Uh, I only have these Bribera Berry election fliers. Do you accept those as payment? This one is signed!

Asbestos: No the hell we do not, punk! Fuck your fliers! Besides, that signature is clearly forged.

Passerby 2: It is?!

Asbestos: New tactic. Pyramids! Pyramids! Come getcher ice cold legally acquired pyramids! And if you recruit two others to help us sell these, you win the chance to lose time and money!

Passerby 1: It's a deal! How many fliers for three pyramids?

Asbestos: None! We accept cash, we accept card, we don't accept excuses! New tactic. Organs! Organs! Come getcher ice-cold legally acquired organs! 

(quieter)

Abraham, you don't smoke or drink, right?

Passerby 2: I'll take his liver for fifty fliers!

Asbestos: Godammit. Well, I didn't want to do this (yes I did) but you've left me no choice (there are innumerable other choices that I'm discounting right now). There's one place in this town guaranteed to have money, and that's…

Ham: The swimming pool?

Asbestos: No.

Ham: The local kindergarten!

Asbestos: Nuh uh.

Ham: The library?

Asbestos: Are you kidding?

Ham: Um… Can I get a hint?

Wait, you don't mean- No no no, we're not doing this. Stanley, tell her to stop. Stanley!

[suspenseful music]

Trailer voiceover: This summer… Three friends will attempt the heist of the century, but only three will survive! Starring Asbestos Le Guin as a badboy with a sensitive side!

Asbestos: Robber? I hardly know 'er!

Trailer voiceover: Hamuel Burger as her quirky animal sidekick!

Ham: Please get me out of here! I don't want to go to jail!

Trailer voiceover: And Stanley Knife as a warrior space cowgirl! I'm not entirely sure how that fits in with the group's cover story, but he just seemed so excited to dress up that we didn't have the heart to say no. Garfield Five: The Beast Within! Coming to cinemas August 29th. Wait, that can't be the right title. Can I do a retake? 

[trailer music ends]

[scene change. we're at the bank.] 

Bank Teller: Welcome to the Bank of America, ma'am. Sir? Um, you with the shapely antennae. Would you like to make a deposit?

Asbestos: Yeah, I'm just having a slight issue. We actually came here to rob this bank, but I've cracked open every vault and there doesn't seem to be any money inside. Do you have any idea where we can find it? And I come from a noble warrior/poet race known as "the streamers". You may address me as such.

Bank Teller: Sorry, Mr. the Streamer, I'm afraid there's none left. Ever since Bribera Berry began her campaign, everyone in the town withdrew their life's savings to buy her political fliers. I'm not sure if you've noticed, but they've become a kind of de facto currency around here.

Asbestos: Oh, we've noticed. We've noticed. Thanks anyway.

This is it, chat. This is the end. What kind of a streamer am I if I can't even scam my way into a charity event to kill my opponent? Although I suppose I could try just blowing up the building from the outside… No, even the explosives in this town are probably made of fliers. What about sneaking in disguised as a waiter? No, my zest for life and optimistic outlook render me unable to make a convincing hospitality worker. Alright, I'm taking suggestions from the floor.

Chat: I think if you just keep killing people, eventually it'll all work out. #istandwithasbestos #asbestosdidnothingwrong 

Chat (diff voice): That's right, keep encouraging her. I'm taking bets on how deep of a hole she can dig herself into.

Chat (diff voice): 6 feet.

Chat (diff voice): 100 feet. 

Chat (diff voice): Hahahahaheeheehoohoo. You said feet.

Ham: Well, it was nice meeting you, but it looks like your presidential campaign has come to an end. No need to give us a lift back to Idaho, there's a bus we can catch that leaves in 15 minutes. Stanley and I wish you the best in your future endeavours. Goodbye forever!

[harmonica]

I'm not telling her that.

[harmonica]

No, stop encouraging her!

Asbestos: What is it?

Ham: Stanley was just remarking on how we left the diner without finishing our food. He's hungry, Asbestos! You're contributing to the harmful romanticisation of the starving artist by denying a growing boy his food!

Asbestos: It's unamerican to lie, Abraham Nothingburger. I see your famous nickname, "Honest Abe", was nothing but jest. I bet the thing about doing your homework on the back of a coal shovel was a falsehood as well! What about you is real, young man? Nothing? Nothing at all? You disappoint me. 

Ham: For the last time, my name isn't Abraham!

Asbestos: See? Even his name is a lie! I know your mother didn't raise you like this, kid. What did Stanley really say?

Ham: He didn't say anything!

Asbestos: That's interesting, because I distinctly heard royalty free jaunty harmonica sound effect 5 dot mp3. Are you telling me I was hallucinating?

[royalty free jaunty harmonica sound effect 5 dot mp3]

There it is again! Are you telling me that wasn't royalty free jaunty harmonica sound effect 5 dot mp3?

Ham: Fine. Stanley says that if the people in this town want fliers so much, we should just sell them fliers. 

Asbestos: Why the hell didn't I think of that? Fliers! Fliers! Come getcher ice-cold legally acquired fliers! 

[commotion]

Passerby 1: I'll take a thousand in exchange for my house, my dog, my dignity, half my lifespan… Nay, my whole lifespan, for my existence dwindles to nought in comparison to a signed, limited edition Bribera Berry flier!

Asbestos: I'll just take your money, if that's okay. Put that kidney back where it belongs! Ew! Ew! Stop trying to give me your firstborn children, this thing isn't even authentic! I forged the signature myself, see? It's written in glitter pen! I made eight spelling errors!

Passerby 1: Even better! Once Presidential Candidate Bribera Berry sees that I would lay down my life for the chance to grasp even a pale mockery of her grace, she shall surely reply to my fanmail! I've sent her three marriage proposals and still haven't heard back. Do you think they got lost in the mail?

Ham: They're buying the fliers faster than we can print them! The copy machine almost tore my arm off!

Asbestos: Well, put a bandaid on the stump and keep working! If you have time to bleed, you have time to fuel capitalist greed!

Herald: Make way! Make way! I come bearing a message from her supreme graciousness lady Bribera Berry of the United States! Are you disgraced streamer Asbestos le Guin? Ah, you must be. I can tell from your swagless aura and general lack of redeeming qualities. The lady Bribera has heard that, despite being her greatest rival in this race to kill the- I mean, become the president, you have been handing out political fliers endorsing her for the position. She just thinks it's so nice to see women in politics supporting each other and invites you to attend her charity event so that you may speak face to face. 

Asbestos: Women in politics? Women in politics? I'm a woman in severe mental distress and a man badly in need of a drink. Abraham! Fetch me my apple juice!

Ham: Would you like ice with that?

Asbestos: And a little umbrella. I'm feeling distinctly tropical.

Credits

Asbestos: Podcast! Podcast! Come get your ice cold legally acquired podcast! May contain traces of lemons squeezed by Bulk, a bucket of sugar poured in by Spikes, a few cups of water added by Rawlyx, ice cubes frozen by Devyn Boer, a bottle of three in one shampoo snuck in by Lumi Oakes, a few teeth lost by Dan Mac, ten drops of red dye 40 contributed by N. V. May, and the last remaining scrap of hope for humanity that Maddie Girouard possessed. The Asbestos Le Guin corporation will not be held liable for any deaths resulting from the consumption of this fun and fizzy beverage. Drink at your own risk.