#super annoying and I should stop doing it
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Pathetic
── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ──
Pairing | Stepbro!Neil Lewis x reader
Summary | Your stepbrother is weird and annoying, but you’ve found a way to make good use of him.
Warnings | Smut, dub con? but like not really, incest technically, dry humping, cunnilingus, multiple orgasms, he’s very pathetic, and subby, reader is very mean.
Words | 1.2 k
Notes | Idk in my head they’re both in college but still living at home lol. Also once again, I can’t think of a title😭
Ao3 link | <3
Masterlist
Kinktober | day 17: degradation
You thought your step brother was super weird and honestly a little annoying… but there were some redeeming qualities. He’ll pretty much do whatever you say— he’s only a few months younger, but he acts like it. Even though he’s taller and probably stronger, you can still boss him around like an older sister should. Then there was… his other useful quality.
“You’re such a fucking pervert.” You spat, almost disgusted, and he whined behind you as his hips sped up. You were currently on your hands and knees on his bed, wearing just a shirt and panties. Neil was behind you, holding your hips still so he could dry hump you with his clothed dick in the cleft of your ass, over your underwear. “This is what gets you off? Humping your sister like a dog?” You snickered.
“Oh god…” He moaned, rutting against you harder and faster. “Fuck, I- I’m gonna come.” He whimpered and you barked out a laugh.
“Already?” His whines got louder and louder until his hips stilled a little and he was moaning and whimpering instead. You could feel his come soaking through both pairs of underwear and his cock twitching as it stayed pressed between your cheeks. “That’s all it takes? You just rub your dick on something and come in less than five minutes?”
“Stop..” He whined pathetically.
“Get off me.” You huffed, leaning up to push him down on the bed. You got him on his back, then straddled his hips and began grinding on him again, this time with your cunt.
“Wait- wait,” He choked out, grabbing your hips. He let out a pained whine at the overstimulation, only encouraging you.
“Don’t be such a baby.” You started grinding down on him harder, mostly to make it hurt more for him, but also to finally get yourself close to the edge.
“Please stop..” He threw his head back and squeezed his eyes shut, barely coping with the overstimulation.
“God- do you ever shut up?” You groaned, leaning over him to put a hand over his mouth. The new angle was stimulating your clit even more, making you curse under your breath.
He sobbed out a moan behind your hand and looked up at you with glossy eyes, his brows scrunched together in pain. Pink dusted his cheeks and you couldn’t help but enjoy the sight.
He’s never looked more pathetic.
“Y’know, if you actually knew how to make a girl come, I wouldn’t have to do this.” You said bitterly, making him whine. “Of course I had to get stuck with a fucking virgin for a step brother. Maybe I’ll go find one of your friends— see if they have better stamina than a fucking teenager.” His hips bucked under yours, making you smirk a little.
“Oh, do you like that?” You sneered. “Is that what you are, a cuck? Should I let you watch your friends do a better job than you ever could?” In response, he whimpered and shook his head.
“You’re so fucking useless. This isn’t even worth it— I’m just going to get off by myself.” You started to lean up and when he reached out for you in a panic, you slapped his hands away.
“No! I- I’m sorry. I can help.”
“Can you?” You scoffed. “I don’t think your pathetic excuse for a cock will help me very much.”
“My— my mouth..” You huffed, but laid down on your back, making him frown when your come soaked underwear got on his sheets.
“Get to it then.” You snapped, bringing him into motion. He laid down between your legs and wrapped his arms under your thighs, then pulled your underwear to the side. He started with slow kisses and licks, quickly testing your patience. “Why am I coming like this and not with my vibrator?” You asked sarcastically, egging him on. Which got him to start moving more enthusiastically, sucking on your clit and slurping up your arousal.
“God, you even eat pussy like a fucking virgin.” You muttered, sounding almost bored. He whined against you, sucking on your clit even harder and occassionally fucking his tongue inside you.
You waited for him to bring you to the edge, but it was taking a while, so you decided to grab your phone and watch something to help you get there. The movement of you picking up the device caught his attention and he looked up at you without removing his mouth from your pussy. When moans started playing through the speaker, he immediately frowned and his ministrations faltered.
“I let you come. Do the same for me or I’ll tell your mom about how much of a pervert her ‘precious baby boy’ is.” You snapped. He stared at you with slightly wide eyes, then reluctantly put his attention back on your cunt.
The porn was definitely helping, as was knowing how degraded he probably felt. After a few minutes, he pulled back and you looked down at him, raising your brows.
“My tongue is getting sore.” He explained with a pout, making you scoff.
“You’re the one who begged to eat me out. Stop fucking complaining.” Using your free hand, you grabbed his hair and yanked his head back down, burying his face in your pussy. You held him in place like that for a few minutes, but when you started nearing the edge, you put his head in a leg lock, keeping his mouth pressed firmly against your cunt, giving him no other choice but to make you come.
When you finally fell over the edge, you squeezed his head with your leg even tighter and your back arched off the bed. He was moaning against you and humping the bed, apparently enjoying your orgasm almost as much as you.
After the pleasure faded, you let out a heavy breath and sagged back onto the bed, closing your eyes. Neil let out a soft sound against your pussy, so you sighed, but let your leg fall back down onto the bed, allowing him to pull off. The bottom half of his face was completely covered in his spit and your arousal, and he panted heavily for a few seconds as he wiped his face with the back of his hand.
“Can I please come again?” He asked timidly, waiting until you had mostly recovered from your orgasm to ask.
You looked down at him, then rolled your eyes and reached for your phone again. “Whatever. Hump my leg I guess.” He whined quietly, but straddled your thigh and started rutting against you while you scrolled through your phone, waiting impatiently for him to finish.
Soon enough, his breathing was starting to pick up and his hips were moving more desperately as he neared the edge. “Fuck.. I’m gonna come.” He choked out, humping you frantically. When the front door slammed shut though, both of you froze.
“Can you help bring in the groceries?” His mom called out from downstairs.
“Be right there!” You yelled back, then sat up, making him whine loudly.
“No- please.. I’m so close.”
“Not my problem, loser. Get off.” You spat, pushing him off your leg onto the bed. You stood up, but paused when you heard quiet whimpering. More come was leaking from his underwear and he quickly reached down to try and salvage the rest of his ruined orgasm. You watched him stroke his erection through the fabric, getting his come all over his hands and crotch, making an even bigger mess.
“You’re so fucking gross.” You scoffed, making him whine pathetically. Before leaving, you picked up his shirt from the floor and wiped the rest of his come from your ass, then put your shorts back on and walked out.
#neil lewis smut#neil lewis x reader#neil lewis#Neil lewis x reader smut#cillian murphy#kinktober 2024#kinktober
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Am I the only one who is disappointed with Caitvi in season two? When I watched the first season I had the biggest caitvi brain rot because they actually gave me SUCH a fun dynamic with them. Buddy cop Caitvi was hilarious, I loved that so so much!
And season 2 started of strong imo but then it rushed through everything. I loved the scene in the cell, obviously, but it was misplaced. Your sister is about to kill herself girl what are you doing this is not the time!! And other than romantic and sexual tension there wasn't all that much left of their previous dynamic aside from the brief scene in episode six...
Idk, I think I'm just annoyed. Usually when I see a non canon gay ship get more traction than the Canon lesbian couple, I just assume it's misogyny or lesbophobia, and move on with my life. But I can't even do that here because Caitvi was WAY more popular in season 1 (as they should).
Jayvik isn't getting somewhat more popular in season 2 because people don't like lesbians, but because their arcs are connected so strongly to each other. (Also I'm not saying that Jayvik is now more popular than Caitvi, but it's like a graph where the super high stocks caitvi are still even while Jayvik is skyrocketing rn)
Wanna know why Jayvik wasn't all that popular in season 1? Because (after act 1) their arcs were mostly separate, safe for a couple of moments. Viktor worked on his body and Jayce was doing politics.
Caitlyn and Vis arcs intertwined more, they actually did shit together and it was beautiful, funny, romantic, EVERYTHING!
Also a fun opposites attract buddy cop dynamic is also just more fun than men who do science together (in my personal opinion)
Now let's look at Caitlyn and Vis relationship in season two.
It starts of strong. I momentarily thought that Caitlyn was uncharacteristically mean to Vi when she refused to become an enforcer, but she apologized for it later and I recognized the fact that Caitlyn was grieving. Then once we get to episode two and three I could already feel their relationship being a bit more odd. The kiss (though I cheered) didn't feel right. I felt like something was missing, and that was their chemistry from season one. Also I feel like we glossed over too many decisions that Caitlyn made, and I think Vi should've put a stop to it sooner. But overall I was okay with them in act 1.
Then we had a timeskip and the two were fully separated. Act 2 literally started with Caitlyn in bed with another woman, like we can see they're not together anymore. Caitlyn has obviously changed, there is not much of the sweet cupcake left that we had come to love in season 1, and Vi is boxing and getting drunk.
Then they meet and like... Vi calls Cait cupcake, and Cait switches sides IMMEDIATELY? GIRL WTF?!
I get that Caitlyn wasn't entirely on Ambessas side the entire time, but I had hoped for more drama first. So you're telling me the very next interaction the two have after their heart wrenching falling out is them making up again? Come on.
Then we had act 3 and overall it was better I think but the timing of their hot scene in the cell was just odd, like what about your sister about to kill herself? I was very happy and hyped in the moment but then I realized how rushed this was. Why? Why make em fuck right here? And in the final act, the two weren't together because again, their arcs were not as connected. And that's actually pretty cool to have a couple who do their own things! But it doesn't help their relationship when they, in turn, aren't given enough time to develop as a pair!
I feel like season 1 did this incredible job of setting these characters up, showing us why they work so well together and why they would fall for one another. And season 2 gave us pay off for it but with very little set up, which was needed because of how Cait changed throughout the season. I don't mention Vi here because she did not change. She had her drunk boxing phase, which we got nothing but a montage off, but everything else is basically season 1 Vi aside from very few things here and there. Like her becoming an enforcer wasn't a character change for Vi, her finally letting go of powder and calling her sister Jinx, wasn't a big character moment for Vi, they were pay off for a set up we didn't get enough of.
SO TO GET TO MY POINT:
S2 was rushed. We should've AT LEAST gotten 3 seasons, like minimum, because there was a whole lot of plot and very little moments in between for characterization. Especially for Caitlyn and Vi and their relationship to each other.
I still generally prefer Caitvi to Jayvik, but only because of season 1. Season 2 gave me the two things I wanted most (a sexy scene and a kiss) but forgot to give me the things that made me fall in love with this ship in the first place.
Which was the hilarious buddy cop dynamic of rich girl cop Cait, and broke butch prisoner Vi.
#arcane#arcane s2#caitvi#jayvik#caitlyn kiramman#arcane vi#It's not that I dislike Caitvi now. I just think they could've given us more#Season 2 was very entertaining and artistically beautiful#But it wasn't the masterpiece that season 1 was#arcane critical#arcane criticism
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“Aziraphale reads into Crowley’s words a well-suppressed wistfulness… that is not there.” OP, I think you’re right on the money. And I think Aziraphale makes an assumption about Crowley—one that a huge proportion of the fandom does, too—that’s not supported by Crowley’s own words: that he “fell” rather than sauntered. That it was something done TO him, as a punishment, instead of something he DID, as a choice.
And the joy on Aziraphale’s face, thinking he found the perfect solution to all Crowley’s problems… well, that didn’t so much surprise me as make my stomach sink with sick recognition.
(apologies in advance, I am about to project on this character like the fucking bat signal)
All the people who knew me when I was Catholic Aziraphale thinks he knows why Crowley’s excommunicated a demon now: because he was gay asked some questions, and got kicked out for it. Aziraphale is sure that it’s a mistake that Crowley isn’t a Catholic an angel anymore, because Crowley is so genuinely good-hearted, and he loved his work as a Catholic an angel, and he seemed so happy, and, well, isn’t Christianity Heaven supposed to be about doing good? So all Aziraphale has to do is let him back in! He found an affirming church a queer-friendly translation of the Bible an LGBTQ-run spirituality book club a loophole, so it’s all right!
But—and I realize I am violating bedrock fandom dogma here—I don’t think Crowley fell because he asked questions. I think fell because he realized that some important questions have answers.
Questions like: if the mind of God is definitionally unknowable, can there be any meaningful relationship between a person and their God? (No.) God may have complex God-reasons for letting a sparrow die, but does that mean there’s a reason for the sparrow’s relationship to God to take the form of reverence? (No.) Is the sparrow in a position to know if its reverence, or lack thereof, has any value to God? (No.) If the sparrow chooses to fly away, try to avoid its death, will that make any difference in the end, if God is truly omnipotent? (No.) But does it make a difference to the sparrow? (Yes.)
Am I horrified by the cruelty of Christianity’s central theological assertion—that everyone goes to hell unless they accept Jesus Christ as their personal savior? (Yes.) Do I believe that it is true? (No.) Is this because I believe that Jesus is actually kind and sweet and didn’t mean any of those things he said about bringing not peace, but a sword? (No.) Is it because I have always treated my faith as a thought experiment, not a genuine cosmology, whether I realized it or not? (Yes.) Can I reconcile the cruelty of Christian cosmology with my own ethics? (No.) Would I be happier if I left the church and became an atheist? (No.) Am I an atheist already? (Yes.) Having realized this, is there any way for me to stay Catholic? (No.) Is this “religious trauma”? (I genuinely don’t think so.) Do people assume that I’ve got “religious trauma” and that if I just found the RIGHT church, a GOOD church, one focused on the REAL teachings of Jesus, that I could be healed? (Oh boy.)
I do not think Crowley “fell,” in the sense of being cast out against his will. I think he chose to leave. And I think he doesn’t talk about it much with my Christian friends Aziraphale because he can’t find a way to explain it that doesn’t implicitly say, hey, so you know, this thing? This thing that you clearly care about very, very deeply? The thing that gives your existence meaning? It does not exist in the version of reality I inhabit.
It’s difficult to find a kind way to say that. I mean, I sure as heck haven’t. So much easier to just let sleeping dogs lie, rather than confront the fact that—nothing unfair happened to me to make me not like you. There are things you value that I… don’t. That I never will. I’m not asking you to abandon them, but I need you to understand that I don’t want those things back. Even if there was a time when I DID want them, even if you feel like I deserve to have them! You need to figure out how to love someone who doesn’t want the things that are most important to you, and still wants you.
I could not wrap my mind around why Aziraphale was so Stoked to make his offer to Crowley to return to Heaven, when it's so clear to all of us that it's the last thing Crowley wants, that the very offer is so hurtful to him. I mean, the angel was about to POP with his good news!
Aziraphale is prone to assume what's best for the other person and what the other person is thinking (see him telling Crawley "I know you!" in 2500 BC, when they hadn't even seen each other since the Flood 500 years ago. Yes, he was right about Crawley in that situation - but that's still one presumptuous statement). But where did it all go so wrong on this particular line of thought?
I think it goes back to the last time we see Azirpahale refer specifically to Crowley's angelic origin.
It has been brought up previously by @kedreeva and others, such as in this discussion, that this line was Already a tentative offer for Crowley to seek safety in return to Heaven, or at least an expression of hope that things could back to the way they were. And Crowley does not say "I don't want to go back to being an angel". He says
It's old history. It's not worth bringing up because it has passed and will not return.
What Crowley says is
And he means "The angel of the past - that's not me. It is no longer me, and has not been for ages. I am what I am now - take it or leave it."
But what Azirphale hears is "HEAVEN WON'T FORGIVE ME. There is no way back and it's not worth talking about BECAUSE THEY WOULD NEVER EVER LET ME BACK IN."
So of course he races back from Metatron to tell Crowley that yes, yes they would! yes, he Can be forgiven!
Aziraphale reads into Crowley's words a well-suppressed wistfulness... that is not there. I hear the echoes of so much post-s1 meta and fic saying "now that the Armageddon is over, they need to have a chat, they need to go back to what was said in the bandstand, painful as it was, and talk it through!"
I think they never brought it up once.
#good omens#good omens spoilers#good omens meta#crowley#cw catholicism#god damn it why I gotta infodump on my personal atheism journey like this#super annoying and I should stop doing it
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Saw someone say it wasn’t realistic that rui is now liked by more people & he should have to experience more social rejection and be fine with it for an arc because it’s “not realistic” & (extremely loud incorrect buzzer) uh oh! looks like someone failed their rui kamishiro classes.
A lot of Rui’s issues with connecting with others/being disliked by his peers had to do with people just not understanding him - assuming he was dangerous, that he was willing to put people in harms way, that he was just a crazy director. There was a massive gap in maturity, of course - if you put a super genius (autism coded) child in a group with average kids, he’s going to stick out. RMD shows this pretty clearly. He attempted to reach out through using shows as a common ground, which didn’t work.
Now that he’s in high school, and his peers are more mature, those who actually speak to him and spend time with him are able to recognize that he’s actually a good guy. Look at his relationship with Akito if you need an example. Additionally, through tsukasa & wxs Rui was able to realize he could connect to people outside of shows and he stopped acting very… indifferent to everyone around him, which also helped with making friends. The pandemonium crew were a special case because they all thought Rui’s knowledge/inventions/etc were cool from the get go, but other students… did not share that opinion. And still don’t.
There are a lot of examples I could bring up, but the 2nd card story in Rui’s “Brand New Style” 2* (TL Haruka’s penguins) is one of the best:
2nd year (greening) committee member A: Well, I’m still attached to the plants I took care of, so I thought I’d take care of them until I graduate.
3rd year committee member A: That’s understandable. Besides… ever since Kamishiro-kun joined us, it’s been much easier to take care of them.
2nd year committee member B: True, the flowerbeds aren’t getting vandalized anymore!
Rui: I don’t think I’ve really done much… but I’m honored to hear you say something like that.
3rd year committee member B: Yeah, I’m really looking forward to working with you again this year, Kamishiro!
Rui: (The atmosphere of this committee has changed a lot.)
Rui: (When I first joined, the looks everyone gave me weren’t exactly ones of “welcoming.”)
Rui: (Now, though, I seem to have gained their understanding. I’m grateful.)
Rui: (But…)
1st year committee members: Hey, isn’t that the senpai we heard those rumors about? The one from the weirdo one-two finish…
1st year committee members: That problem child who flies drones and conducts dangerous experiments in school? Why does he have to be in the Greening Committee…? I thought it was meant to be a peaceful committee…
Rui: (… Well, I suppose it can’t be helped.)
[rui is asked to be the one to explain greening committee’s responsibilities to the new 1st year members]
Rui: Would everyone please follow me?
1st year committee members: O… okay…
[scene change to outside]
1st year committee members: I never thought I’d end up getting involved with the senpai from the rumors like this…
1st year committee members: My friend’s older brother said to stay away from him because he’s supposed to be dangerous…
Rui: We’re here.
1st year committee members: O-okay!
Rui: All the flowerbeds facing this schoolyard are managed by the greening committee.
Rui: We’re in charge of daily watering duty, but we also work with the soil and plant new flowers during committee time.
Rui: The seeds for the flowers over there were planted a few months ago by the committee members. I’m glad to see the buds have finally sprouted.
1st year committee members: Hmm, you’ve been growing them from seeds, these flowers —
Rui: Ah, please be careful when you go to touch the flowers. It’s difficult to see, but there’s a net in front of the flowerbed.
1st year committee members: Woah, there is…! I didn’t notice at all, but there’s a net of threads like a spider web…!
1st year committee members: But what’s the purpose of that?
Rui: This flowerbed is positioned in quite a precarious place.
Rui: The flowers planted here were often crushed by stray balls from the tennis and softball clubs.
Rui: In order to protect the flowers from such accidents… but also to avoid spoiling the scenery, an almost invisible defense net was made.
1st year committee members: “Was made”… Did you make it, Kamishiro-senpai?
Rui: I did. I felt sorry for the flowers, you see.
1st year committee members: … Someone who’s known for dangerous experiments is working with the flowers…
Rui: … Oh dear. This flower seems to have withered.
1st year committee members: Ah… If it’s withered that much, I doubt it’ll grow anymore. You’ll be wasting the nutrients of other flowers, so it’s better to thin out—
Rui: … No.
Rui: I’ll put this flower in another planter and take care of it.
Rui: When it’s recovered, I’ll return it to this flowerbed. It should be together with everyone else, after all.
1st year committee members: Kamishiro-senpai…
1st year committee members: … I will do my best as a greening committee member.
1st year committee members: Senpai, please teach me a lot!
I think this card story is a microcosm of how he started to be more accepted at school - 1st years are scared of him, then they spend time with him and realize he’s not Some Insane Dangerous Monster but instead a nice guy (… when he’s not being a freak), and are like “oh ok he’s not a bad person we accept him.” Crucially: there are still other students who don’t accept him. & Rui has never really had an issue brushing this off, even if it’s obviously not something he enjoys experiencing.
I could talk at length on how I think this is actually a pretty realistic portrayal of what it’s like when you go from being really misunderstood (and therefore unliked) as a kid and then have an easier time making friends when you’re older, but I don’t think that’s necessary. I will say that I think if pjsk elected to instead constantly hammer in the fact that some people still don’t like rui it would kind of run against the story’s message of improving your life. We don’t need to dwell on sad things constantly in the Hopeful Hatsune Miku Game. But whatever ¯\_(ツ)_/¯.
The thread also mentioned that Rui should have been more upset in BLF over not immediately succeeding, which I don’t have as much to say about beyond. No? It shouldn’t have? Why would it? Rui himself acknowledges that he’s not as well versed in the world of movie directing, and he’s always been eager to learn, which is a sign that he knows there are gaps in his knowledge. Similar to the rest of WxS, setbacks regarding his passions are something he views as an opportunity to improve.
Also. Rui *has* failed before as a director, just not on a massive scale. He mentions regretting type casting Tsukasa up until the torpe show, he mentions being at a loss for how to help Tsukasa in Phoenix, he talks about how his lack of singing knowledge was detrimental to Nene’s growth. I agree that it would be interesting to see him struggle in a big way with directing specifically, but it’s just not true that he’s never failed at anything ever wrt directing.
#offering a transcription of (most) of the story to make things very very easy#look. you don’t even have to watch the (under 5 minute) video.#mine#rui#analysis#other things rui has failed at: making friends. convincing tsukasa to do the underwater show. not injuring anybody.#keeping his thoughts to himself. need I go on. I mean I’d love to see him struggle with stuff I’ve said this before#(directing stuff that is) but I think the idea of him getting super upset in BLF is silly.#me & the stockpile of wxs knowledge I keep in my head to be annoying about when I disagree with a take. a beautiful love story.#people should stop being wrong about rui so I can stop writing long posts about him
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so i was watching some of my dashcam footage that i deliberately saved bc of Calgary Driver Shenanigans taking place in proximity to me and i straight up hate people who brake-check so much
pulling that shit is so dangerous, even at "low" speeds. and even if someone is riding your asshole hard, you don't brake-check them. as soon as you do a brake-check, you have now made yourself the more reckless driver in that equation.
you should never, ever do something to deliberately cause a collision when operating heavy machinery.
like, i cannot even fathom the kind of self-absorbed loser you have to be to play chicken like that in a way that could get someone fucking killed.
just... like... i keep thinking back to this accident that happened here one or two years ago, where a pick-up truck brake-checked a minivan on the highway in less than ideal driving conditions and the van spun out, and then rolled multiple times into the ditch, and one of the children in the van was ejected. the pick-up truck didn't even stop and as far as i'm aware was never even found. like that driver fucking killed a kid.... and for what? the driver of the van maybe pissed them off? was driving a bit too close? like please, if you are someone who brake-checks because you assume you'll be just fine if you get hit bc "lol i'm insured" you should always assume that the worse possible outcome could happen. when operating heavy machinery going more than 20mph around other people also operating heavy machinery going the same or higher speeds, you should always be thinking about the worst case scenario of pulling a dumbass move that affects multiple ppl.
like when you brake-check someone, you think this is a tussle that's just between you and that person, yeah? and you feel justified because maybe this person is driving too close, or they seem distracted, or maybe they pissed you off earlier, right? Oh, but I bet you looked all around, considered all of the variables, and determined that should an accident occur, it's only the two of you that's gonna have your day ruined, right? I'm sure you're cocky enough to think that. Like I'm positive (sarcastic) you've thought about all of these things before brake-checking:
the other vehicles in the road other than you and the person behind you
is there a big truck behind the person behind you that is going to have a fucking heart attack trying to stop?
the road conditions in general
what if the driver behind you doesn't have new tires? what if one of their tires blows out trying to brake and they spin out?
are their pedestrians you might be endangering if your stupid move causes an accident?
what if the other driver has kids in the car? passengers in general? your beef is with the driver, but causing an accident would be punishing their innocent passengers too
what if the accident you cause totals your car? are you able to be without a car?
what if the accident totals the other person's car? what if their livelihood depends on them having a car?
what if the other person doesn't have insurance? yeah, that's illegal, but it does you no good. if you think your insurance is going to pick up the tab in that case with no fight at all, you're naive as fuck. like unless you have complete car insurance and not just liability insurance, your insurance company will fucking fight any claim you make. even with complete car insurance, they fight claims. remember, car insurance companies are in the business of hoarding the money you pay them. they do not actually want to pay out.
what if the other driver has a dashcam and can definitively prove that you braked for no reason other than to endanger literally everyone else on the road?
like that's just some of the things to fucking consider re: brake-checking. and when the list of risks is that long while incomplete, what do you even gain by brake-checking?
brake-checking is petty, stupid, and fucking reckless. it can seriously injure people that aren't even involved in your beef, and it can even kill people. brake-checking is some of the most self-absorbed behaviour to have behind the wheel, and people who do it are fucking losers.
period.
even if the other driver is following too close, or driving aggressively. you don't make an already dangerous situation even more dangerous oh my fucking god like why isn't that common fucking sense.
#the situation that prompted this rant was on friday i approached a light as it turned green so i didn't brake#i just kinda coasted up to the vehicle that had been stopped at the light and they were very slow to actually GO#anyway eventually they got... i guess close to the speed#but we were going down a steep hill that increased in speed by 20 clicks at the bottom#i was just kind of coasting behind this person who was going 10 UNDER and there were vehicles in the lane next to me so i couldn't go aroun#the guy does kind of a hard brake at the top of the hill#shortly after the light#and i easily slow to match him even though it was kinda annoying#like he was already going 50 in a 60 zone#why was he braking??????#then he did another HARD brake close to the bottom#but next to a an exit and the person in front of them exited there#so i thought maybe that was the culprit for the brake-checking#but then past the exit the dude brakes SUPER HARD where there is no reason to brake at all because we should be doing the new speed limit#just.. WHY BRAKE-CHECKING IS SO FUCKING STUPID#IF YOU BRAKE-CHECK KNOCK IT THE FUCK OFF
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I hate getting into something that has a canon(ish) sapphic couple, but I only end up caring about one of the two women 😭😭😭
#warrior nun? only cared about beatrice couldn't really get behind ava much#the locked tomb? INSANE for gideon. harrow is like cool I guess (I feel like I should like her more than I do idk)#and now dungeon meshi. I knoowwwww I'm going to love falin. 10 episodes in and I already find her relatable and awesome and so cool and sexy#AND SHE BECOMES A DRAGON LIKE FUCK MAN (she's still dead atm but soon soooooon)#marcille on the other hand?? I mean she's fine... but I'm not really drawn to her (I like namari a lot more tbh)#and the thing is I know part of it is the feminization of all three of them#I am not attracted to femininity pretty much ever (outside of a super sexed up version in which case gugh)#and ava and marcielle both have a very bubbly personality type that has never really drawn me in ever#they can have cool stories and I can enjoy them in that. but I have no desire to seek them out outside of that#and harrow... honestly I think it might be the way fandom sees her that makes me not care much about her?#also my feelings about the series as a whole by the end of nona probably don't help#BUT I definitely think a big part for all three is the femininity. none of their counterparts that I DO love are overly fem#(and HONESTLY I don't think harrow should be either and the fact hardly no one actually makes her butch the way I see her pisses me off)#((she CANONICALLY hated her long hair!!!!!!!!! stop giving her anything more than a buzz cut I'm going to attack you!!!!!!))#also. marcielle has green eyes and I'm sorry but I just can't 😭#I need every single character ever in existence to only ever have brown/black or gold/yellow eyes#stop with the blue and the green 😭 please#ANYWAY POINT BEING: I hate that this happens to me because I end up not getting obsessed with the ship#and mostly only getting into the single character but then I don't want to read fic about just one person#so I try out the ship stuff and shocker no one writes the other character in a way I like so I don't read it#and then I feel bad cause all my ships and main characters I'm obsessed over are men#and then I complain all the fandom favs and mcs in stories are men#but like I'm contributing to the problem!!!! but like I'm not attracted to hannibal but I like his personality#I'm not attracted to optimus but I love how fucked up his whole deal with megatron is#I DO love both luffy and zoro even though I'm not really attracted to either of them#the lotr/hobbit ships.... eh I love the world and I love dwarves and I will do anything for them so the characters don't matter much lol#AND THATS THE ISSUE 😭 the worlds of warrior nun and tlt and most of what i've seen of dungeon meshi don't really entrance me much#so I don't get into the ships for that. and I'm not attracted to both people in the ship. and I can't relate/project on both in the ship#and sometimes I find one character type less likable/annoying so that makes me not want to engage
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#my posts#...........................................................................................................................................#............................................................................................................................................#is that enough i think that's enough#yeah that's how its going#everything's been getting worse and I've been feeling very bad but also very pathetic and like complaining almost makes me feel worse but#i can't do anything else about this so like. vent post lmao bc I'm a dumbass#i truly just want to(redacted)but one of those isn't an option and the other i have a drs appointment soon and i don't want to explain that#everything is just. bad. and what isn't i feel like it's getting bad and it's my fault. and I'm probably right.#just. i hate it here#the deserving mentality is truly getting to me and i fucking hate it. it's not logical. I'll still agree with it.#i truly don't deserve the food stuff i can't keep in my life and i deserve the shit that in getting and i can't stop agreeing with that#'oh this classmate wants to have lunch with me on Saturday after working on something! i should cancel before it's too late-#-so i can continue feeling bad for being an apple bc people should hate me bc I'm horrible and don't deserve kindness' like#it's. it's false. it's not logical. and yet#everyone else there's the fucking plexiglass wall and where it wasn't i think it's getting formed and it is my fault probably#i am annoying that one is true#.... I've been making posts like this all day and deleting them bc I'm pathetic also. it's.#... there's a little too much going on lmao#nothing's worth it and i feel like shit and anything i could try to do about it doesn't work and I'm just tired#... in case someone does read this i know it sounds worrying but nothing will happen tbh I'm just a pathetic coward who's sad and tired#and tired of being sad in a way that feels like it's getting worse#I'm not very sure when was the last time i felt. this bad in just. i don't know how to make it stop lmao#also in already annoying so this is all i can do i think lmao#i think I'm seeing now I'm just. being redundant and if i keep this up too much i will delete this. and i should but. i don't think i will#also without saying much this year the one thing™ has been worse than usual and that's not helping either so it truly is just.#that everything is kinda very bad#.... yeah. whatever. it's just.��\_(ツ)_/¯#... i truly wish killing myself was still an option like when i was a teen bit it's not so i just have to deal with whatever this is#... i hate being aware this is all super illogical bc the logical post of my brain teams up making me feel worse somehow.
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we should try talking about how neurodivergent people approach other neurodivergency that is different from theirs/has stronger symptoms and how they treat that but idk if most of y'all are prepared for that conversation
#work liveblog.#like. for example#ive lost friends over my autism and adhd symptoms#when they themselves were adhd/autistic#but mine was weirder or more offputting or kore frustrating to deal with#but i didnt really know i was being like that til it all boiled over#or they just shift their treatment of me as if i am behaving like that on purpose to them#ans they dont really stop to think like#hey. maybe they just dont realise it. maybe i should say smth#or maybe this is just An Aspect of them that i either need to accept or i need to think over our relationship bc of how i feel ab it#or something like that#literally. just talk.#dont be aggressive dont be like 'you keep doing x or y and its so annoying stop it or else'#just. tell me what im doing. and how it makes you feel. like in a calm way#anyways ive got gripes ab how ppl treat me bc of my symptoms and how they differ from theirs#i get talked down to a lot and it seriously grinds my gears#or they get super frustrated. like man i know youre frustrated but so am i i have to live like this forever you can just leave#and never deal w it ever again. i cant#anyways. i am tired i didnt rest well last night
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can we actually stop reblogging those "REBLOG 4 SAFETY" posts too. yknow the one from 4 years ago. arent we all smart enough to not click random links, now?
i actually had to un reblog my response to getting tagged in the post because i realized i was accidentally spreading it XD like, not on my page!!
or holy shit heres a crazy idea can we TAG super long reblogs like those?? like i would not care if you reblog them if it didn't take up like 70% of my dash
EDIT: LMAOOO ALL THE PEOPLE IN THE REPLIES ARE TALKING ABOUT HOW FAKE IT IS I LOVE THIS WEBSITE
#non omori#feferi rants#yall just rb THIS or some shit so people can stop being super annoying ab these posts#like sorry to go off in these tags but like#can we at least tag longposts/reblogs??#like i know some people already do but it should honestly be the norm
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twitch chats are so exhausting
#discourse#(i guess?)#idk but the amount of times ive seen super invasive questions in a chat#and then the chatter asks it again bc the streamer ignored them#like no stop that what the fuck#or like today!! scott literally had to call someone out to tell them to stop doing some bit about owen's hoodies!#or like the amount of times ive seen people say shit that should have been like. a tumblr post or a message in a discord server with friends#dont say fandom or shippy shit in a streamers chat thats just weird#like its one thing if streamers point out or acknowledge the fandom things (like the sexyman poll) but dont bring it up to them!!#if they wanna poke around in our fandom spaces then fine but dont fucking bring the fandom space to the twitch chat#and also. shifting away from fandom talk but still talking about stream chats#STREAM SNIPING IS SO FUCKING ANNOYING#stop chat hopping jesus christ#anyway both the 'bringing up fandom related things' chatters and stream hopping chatters ruin streams for everyone#not just the streamer#but the viewers too#bc its annoying and honestly uncomfortable#sage speaks
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I think fandom is most divided on s8 in the Sam and Dean wars, like the Dean stans and D/sticule never shut up about it as evil Sammy won't let Dean have friends and the codependency evil and bad and i woke and good and do media right by hating the codependency and every evil person who likes it. Then they'll share Cas and Dean beating each other and how hot it is and how you should like toxic characters and toxic dynamics bcz that's the POINT guys, do media right but you HAVE to be against the codependency and want to get it fixed via D/stiel and characters should be treated like real people who deserve better which is a found family and being gay, or you are evil and not woke like us who do media right and know what's wrong with the show which is that its about glorified toxic family and not about toxic glorified found family. Wah.
#When will i stop#It just annoys me how braindead they are#If they would stop claiming that they are doing media and fandom right#And making weird reactionary anti extreme stan blogs while being one#It would be less annoying#Fandom wank#Like how do they have zero self awareness hmm strange#Also this is why you should simply never feel bad abt a cancelled heller#They are all delusional antis#Anti eat anti world baby#But truly fascinating how they will not let go of this way of watching and demanding ppl watch spn#Cuz of the cult superiority complex it gives them#Like idk dude if you are supposed to like dynamics and characters esp as shown#You should just like the codependency and even john#Instead of being super weird about it and demanding ppl be the same#I mean like whatever and hate whatever you want i just have a problem with ppl forcing ppl to like what they like#And more importantly to hate what they hate and then call it doing media right while being moral wankers#Who love censorship if it suits them
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huge update i might get to go home tomorrow… my professor is opening our final on wednesday instead of just thursday so now i just need to see if my friend i planned to take the exam with can do it wednesday and then if she can (she almost certainly can) i can go home after……. i wanna go homeeee i want this semester to be OVER as soon as humanly possible!!!!!!
#in theory it’s already over. i could literally go home tonight and just take that exam online at my house#but like i said i’m doing it with my friend so.#if i don’t take it with her i won’t be able to focus and it’ll be really annoying it’s a whole thing#beth.txt#but i’m like packing up for the summer now. i guess i could semi- clean the bathroom before my roommate gets back.#i have like 2 and a half more hours to kill right now so.#ugh i HATE cleaning the bathroom unfortunately someone’s got to because i don’t think my roommate ever has or will.#which is fine i mean it’s not like super super gross or anything and i’m not that much of a clean freak#hence why i have not cleaned it in. like. too long probably at this point#i think spring break. yeah there is loose hair like. all over the floor :/#which is not to say i don’t periodically like. shallow clean#like. i clean the sink counter every day i’m here. i’ll do the toilet every like 2ish weeks. the shower gets cleaned in like. patches.#like i have not deep cleaned the shower in an amount of time that would make my sister mad at me if she was here#and the floor. yeah we already mentioned the floor. i’m not a floor cleaner girl#i rarely even vacuum my room i hate cleaning floors it’s the worst fr#well. i should stop making this post and just do it huh
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#I am actually so sick of one person right now#🌹 didn't even do anything THAT bad just lots of things that make me want to crawl out of my skin#🌹 is in one of my classes and my friendgroup but she doesn't hang out with us every day#she always hugs me and holds my hand and is super touchy and always has been but it makes me so desperately uncomfortable!#i dont like to hold people's grimy greasy dirty unwashed hands thank you#and its fucking terrifying to get a flying hug from behind with no warning#i do not want to touch people always can you please piss off!#and she doesn't do that with our cis guy friends so i know she sees me as a girl :(#and today on the bus 🌹 was sitting two seats in front of me with a stranger between us#and she got out her phone and was trying to take photos with me and the person beside me or something?#which annoys me enough on its own#but THE STRANGER WAS IN THEM TOO#poor fucking guy i should've told 🌹 to stop straight away but instead i was just desperately uncomfortable in silence!#and stranger dude was obviously annoyed and asked 🌹 to stop#and i wanted to peel my skin off like a potato right then and there jesus fucking christ#how can people be so fucking obtuse and unaware of other people!#i know i should just verbalise this but i get sweaty palms just talking to people let alone being straight with them#hhhhhhhhhhhh it's nice to have friends but these are the first I've had in a while and its difficult to navigate#but she so obviously sees me as a girl and that makes me majorly uncomfortable on top of everything else#i have to see her again tomorrow in maths#:( why#also she goes so fast in maths it makes me stressed when i am still squinting at the numbers trying to make sense of them#not her fault but just#hhhhh everything else is so avoidable if she just had an ounce of self awareness
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i find it so funny that back in hs everyone always assumed i took honors spanish 4 and ap physics. they genuinely thought i was in the class and knew what they were talking abt and i. was never there. i never signed up for them. lol.
#loner.txt#jun ☕️#i stopped at esp3 bc hs made me HATE learning it#bc i was just learning everything to pass the exams#and that wasnt fair... i wanted to learn spanish bc i Wanted to#i still have a lot of knowledge but its buried and if i practice again i could speak it well#everyone i went to middle school with Knew i was super proficient in spanish#bc i loved the classes and held a 101% grade in the class. somehow. i dont remember how that even happened#physics tho. i wouldve done it bc it was the math based science course#but after chem in jr year. which i HATED. i removed science from my studies.#i remember my advisor was getting annoyed i quit spanish history and science by senior year#listen. i had the reqs to graduate completed. if i dont have to do it or need it. im not doing it.#tho in retrospec i Should have taken physics. between ap calc (physics in calc were insufferable)#and that. my current major..#thooooo then again. i was set on communication design at the time. i didnt know i was going to change over. literally last minute.#the more i think abt it. i was weird abt the classes i took in hs#i blatantly refused to take honors level courses#it was literally. either standard level or ap level. do or die.#why was i like that....#i esp ate my words in senior year bc of ap4. that was AWFUL.#yeah eng is my weakest subject! takes the hardest eng course you can in hs.#proceeds to die.
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lmao
#im sick and tired of late night realizations#like i thought me being super affectionate was just bc i have a lot of love even if it might be annoying sometimes#and i do have a lot of love but also. i feel like i overcompensate with it so that people don't leave me#and instead it does the opposite and drives them off bc i come off too clingy#hm. i should learn to Stop#katie.txt
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i wish mashle was better i cant stop thinking about how little impact it had on me whatsoever
#i still think the start is super fun and charming#but then it stops being funny and is instead a mid to subpar action shounen and gets boring....#also WHERE ARE THE WOMEN... there is one singular woman the series respects and she doesnt come in until the end#the love interest character gets completely shelved to focus on the boys and they know it because they joke about it#and then theres like.. 2 other random girls#who do like 1 thing and then leave forever#the ending is also ughhhh wuatever#the start is worth reading i was genuinely enjoying it but just quit as soon as u get bored because it really doesnt pick back up#theres one thing thats i GUESS a major spoiler but literally was sooo fucking lame that it just pissed me off#i honestly should have seen it coming but its so annoying that i was just like r u fucking kidding me
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