#suicideloss

[samstellarr]

having ptsd is repetitively calling your other parent’s name at random times throughout the day to make sure they didn’t abandon you too

[javailus]

𝗧𝗥𝗜𝗚𝗚𝗘𝗥 𝗪𝗔𝗥𝗡𝗜𝗡𝗚: graphic descriptions, suicide, death of a loved one, grief, gun violence

𝒚𝒂'𝒂𝒃𝒖𝒓𝒏𝒆𝒆

07/18/2021, 1:18 am

5:45 am. 9mm. right temple.

a lump in my throat the size of the hole in his head.

death is so permanent.

i keep thinking i have another alternative,

a plan b;

i'll be able to talk to him again.

i just have to wait until this is all over.

i'll text him and he'll text back and everything will be as it was.

but no, never again.

never, ever again.

i need to get it in my head,

soak it into my pores,

absorb it into my bloodstream.

he is not coming back.

he is not coming back.

i will forget his voice.

his clothes will lose his smell.

i will forget how he looked standing in front of me.

i will no longer be able to replay the sound of his laugh in my head.

i won't be able to show him my favorite songs,

or tell him i got employee of the month twice in a row.

he will never see me go through cosmetology school.

he won't ever watch that show i wanted him to watch because it reminded me of him.

he won't see why it's my comfort show.

i can't scream at him.

tell him what i've had to do,

what i've seen,

what i've found out about people.

i have to be scared now.

i don't have my dad to protect me.

i don't have him as a crutch to lean on.

it is just me now.

i have to be my dad again.

i don't know how many times i've cried and wished i wouldn't be like my dad.

here we are. here i am.

i carry his ashes around my neck and his burdens on my shoulders and i am only 20 years old.

- 𝒋𝒂𝒗𝒂

𝗢𝗧𝗛𝗘𝗥 𝗪𝗢𝗥𝗞𝗦:

https://javailus.wixsite.com/javapoetry

𝗪𝗔𝗧𝗧𝗣𝗔𝗗:

https://www.wattpad.com/user/-java-

𝗩𝗢𝗧𝗘 𝗙𝗢𝗥 𝙔𝘼'𝘼𝘽𝙐𝙍𝙉𝙀𝙀 𝗢𝗡 𝗪𝗔𝗧𝗧𝗣𝗔𝗗:

https://w.tt/44cx50C

[sineadshinelight]

The scars that society say are too ugly to show That only look the way they do because they weren’t given the care and attention needed as healing Perhaps if those scars were treated with more kindness, they would look more like love than pain Repost from @marklemonofficial • Grief. #grief #griefquotes #bereavement #grief #griefandloss #griefawareness #griefjourney #griefrecovery #griefsupport #grieving #grievingprocess #healing #healingjourney #hope #suicideloss #grievingmother #grievingmom #scar https://www.instagram.com/p/CnQ90mEszB0/?igshid=NGJjMDIxMWI=

[otaviogilbert]

Episode 66: Navigating Life's Challenges | A Moving Conversation with My Son Joe | Jenn Drummond

in this heartfelt episode of Seek Your Summit, with my son Joe as we recount our journey to the peak of Kilimanjaro. Amidst physical challenges and cultural awakenings, Joe shares how he overcame his initial reluctance, learning invaluable lessons about self-worth, decision-making, and the subtle art of setting boundaries. We talked about the impact of different cultures on our perspectives and discussed the realizations about happiness that go far beyond material possessions. From navigating teenage complexities to fostering resilience within family dynamics, we reflected on the deep-seated bond we share. Listen as Joe candidly discusses his battles with peer pressure and addictions, highlighting the moments of learning from mistakes to prioritize personal growth.

[artfest]

love lives on, and keeps you close.

[mixedindy]

Michael Dumontier and Neal Farber.

[lifewithchloe97]

Hiya everyone,

I wrote a book.

I speak about the loss of my mum to suicide, my grief story and mental health. I really hope that with the story I tell, I can help others who have gone through the same if not similar experience as me.

If you grieving, remember, you are not alone.

[dulldolx]

He's gone.

He ended his life.

He didn't want to be on this Earth any longer.

He didn't want to wake up to the life he had.

He just wanted... peace.

He wanted his mind, his demons, to finally lay down the arsenal of weapons they come forth with to attack his mind everyday.

He wanted to be something more than he was.

But drugs and alcohol robbed him of his belief.

He tore himself apart, his insecurities ate at him, his mind bullied him.

He didn't want help, or did he?

He wanted someone to listen.

And we thought we did, but now we are questioning... did we?

What if... maybe if we just... we could've... what, when, where... why?

No one is to blame.

Not even him.

But why did it have to be this way.

A piece of me went with you the day you passed.

I feel so empty without you.

I just want to go backwards.

I want our time back.

I just can't believe it is you.

I will never see you smile, hear you laugh, feel your embrace ever again.

I will miss you until my last breath.

And then I will join you once again.

One day.

[sometimesitsfine]

Yesterday was the anniversary of your death and I wasn’t a wreck. Does that make me a bad person? I don’t think so. I think it was okay that I did things to make me happy. I read a book in the sunshine with a cup of coffee and the dogs running. You would be happy about that. Remember when we were looking at adopting a dog in Hawaii? This cute mixed breed dog with a SEVERE overbite...he had half a bottom jaw... and stole our hearts. He had this ridiculous human name like Bob or Billy. Unfortunately our apartment wouldn’t let us have a dog over 30 pounds but man did we have fun giving love to these dogs. I choose to remember these times. Miss you more than you could imagine.

Stef, I am glad you’re in a better place but man I learned that missing you comes in waves. I figured yesterday would be tough, as it was last year, but no today is tough.

[suicidal-blasphemy]

View this post on Instagram

A post shared by Magicalflowfairy✨DARK BARBiE🎀 (@magicalflowfairy)

Don’t ever have a last resort. come to me if you need. Even if I don’t know you my inbox is open. Dancing at a benefit show for my now late friend Kyle Powers. Enjoy. #afsp #benefitshow #kylepowersbenefit #suicideloss #suicideprevention #levitationwand #flowtoys #ledwand #leviwand #contactwand #flow365 #flowartlounge https://www.instagram.com/p/B1-geskhEQl/?igshid=fm4gkkygunng

[dawsonmomforever22]

I miss you every second of every day.

Oh my sweet baby, if tears could bring you back. I miss you with everything in me. My sweet beautiful baby. I love you more than you will ever know.

[javailus]

𝗧𝗥𝗜𝗚𝗚𝗘𝗥 𝗪𝗔𝗥𝗡𝗜𝗡𝗚: suicide of a loved one, intense grief

𝒈𝒊𝒃𝒆𝒍 гибель // 𝒑𝒓𝒐𝒍𝒐𝒈𝒖𝒆

07/01/2021, 10:26 am

so this is grief...

first the world stopped and felt far away.

i couldn't see through my blurred vision when i dialed the number to ask what happened.

i didn't cry until she told me what led up to it.

they don't tell you that even if you didn't see it happen,

you imagine it over and over and over again

and if you don't know how it happened

you go through all of the possibilities in vivid rewinds through your mind's eye,

and the visions don't stop.

they don't tell you that the moment the news left whoever was burdened with telling you's mouth will be vivid in your mind forever.

they don't tell you that your loved ones' screams and cries will replay in your head and you'll never forget.

my body shakes with the energy of unshed emotions i can't reach.

the rain no longer feels like a gift.

it feels like the earth is crying because i can't.

lights are too bright not because of my migraines anymore;

they're too bright because the absence of my dad is a void that should be swallowing the lights and the sun itself,

but the world goes on after death

and the buzzing lights and brazen sun keep shining

despite how i feel,

despite how i want them to go away;

despite how grief is a cold, deep darkness.

grief is also anger.

i tell myself it's okay to be angry.

i know he would too.

i said he was an idiot,

that i hated him.

i don't,

but my anger is so palpable i don't know what to think.

anger leads to blame.

why was he allowed to have access to such a thing?

why didn't i tell him i loved him that night?

if i just said i loved him he wouldn't be gone.

grief is why.

why.

why.

why.

why would you do this to me?

why didn't you think about our future?

why didn't you think about

my sister graduating,

walking me down the aisle,

your 11 year old son?

two days later i sat in the back of my car at 2:00 in the morning on a random street sobbing,

why would you do this to me?

why.

why.

why.

- 𝒋𝒂𝒗𝒂 (poem from 𝒎𝒖𝒓𝒑𝒉𝒚'𝒔 𝒍𝒂𝒘)

𝗢𝗧𝗛𝗘𝗥 𝗪𝗢𝗥𝗞𝗦:

https://javailus.wixsite.com/javapoetry

𝗪𝗔𝗧𝗧𝗣𝗔𝗗:

https://www.wattpad.com/user/-java-

𝗩𝗢𝗧𝗘 𝗙𝗢𝗥 𝙂𝙄𝘽𝙀𝙇 гибель // 𝙋𝙍𝙊𝙇𝙊𝙂𝙐𝙀 𝗢𝗡 𝗪𝗔𝗧𝗧𝗣𝗔𝗗:

https://w.tt/3P5yIZa

[sineadshinelight]

Reminding myself that what ever today brings, I will bring myself compassion, understanding and love The world has moved on but the ground is still unsteady and how can you balance when you don’t even recognise yourself anymore Repost from @gretchnevans • Grief leaves you exhausted and worn down; each day you now have to carry the heavy burden of knowing that someone you deeply love is dead. The last thing you need is to be harshly criticized or told that you are falling short in this already overwhelming experience. And yet, I find that this is how many grievers are speaking to themselves after loss, which is why one of the first things I prioritize is trying to weave some compassion into their story of loss, and their view of how they are surviving this loss. You have been through so much. Each day you are working through an enormous amount of pain to show up. It is incredible that you are here, and that you keep trying despite this deep and heavy loss. I know your heart is broken, I know the pain is so deep you feel like screaming. Remind yourself today that simply being here, continuing to live is incredible. So much love to you dear griever. . . . . . . . . If you are in need of support as you grieve DM me “INFO” for more information the one on one support I offer #grief #griefsupport #griefcoach #siblingloss #siblinglossmatters #suicideloss #suicidelosssurvivor https://www.instagram.com/p/CpwwEu3MU77/?igshid=NGJjMDIxMWI=

[otaviogilbert]

Episode 66: Navigating Life's Challenges | A Moving Conversation with My Son Joe | Jenn Drummond

in this heartfelt episode of Seek Your Summit, with my son Joe as we recount our journey to the peak of Kilimanjaro. Amidst physical challenges and cultural awakenings, Joe shares how he overcame his initial reluctance, learning invaluable lessons about self-worth, decision-making, and the subtle art of setting boundaries. We talked about the impact of different cultures on our perspectives and discussed the realizations about happiness that go far beyond material possessions. From navigating teenage complexities to fostering resilience within family dynamics, we reflected on the deep-seated bond we share. Listen as Joe candidly discusses his battles with peer pressure and addictions, highlighting the moments of learning from mistakes to prioritize personal growth.

[artfest]

[mixedindy]

Grief is a fuckin ride!!!! my words and art - please do not repost!