#sucks 2 b me
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i dont think im gna finish this but vol.13 elendira means everything 2 me 🤭
#elendira#elendira the crimsonnail#trigun#trigun maximum#trigun spoilers#my art#u can tell i struggled so hard w her outfit (did not use a good ref LMAOO)#also idk i hate backgrounds like the thought of actually rendering one out made me want 2 die#so i hope this shows enough of what i was going for HEHHAAHAH#ughhhUGHHHHHGFHHG love her i love her#actuakky idk how much i like this .. hrmm.. this and one of my wws i might axe them both t b and h#but i omly have like 0.2 trigun drawings in my tag so maybe i should just suck it up and keep them😭#fr now.. BUT YEAAA WHEN SHE TOOK OFF HER COAT MY JAW DROPPEDDD#BE MINEEEE (begginh on my hands and knees s)
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watched brokeback mountain yesterday.... mid as fuck. i think it wouldve played out a lot better if the main characters were yuri and jimmy from yarichin bitch club. do u see my vision?
#brokeback mountain#yarichin bitch club#yarichin b club#toru fujisaki#yuri ayato#ybc#ybc jimmy#yuritoru#idk their fuckin ship name#im a gay male im allowed to say brokeback mountain actually fucking sucks#i get what its doing yknow time period repression tragedy wrong time wrong place BUT GODDD I JUST DONT CARE#I DONT CARE IT SUCKS AND CHEATING TURNS ME OFF SO BAD#its like good in a technical skill way okay its a well made movie but my enjoyment was a solid 2/10 i could only watch it wif my friends#main way this could be improved is if the main characters were jimmy and yuri#if yuri and jimmy were doing this shit.... lets just say they wouldnt be hatecrimed to death for being gay#theyd be begged to leave town purely bc theyre both batshit insane and jimmy would accidentally kill 17 people via homemade cookie poisoning#draws#**obama voice** just to be queer. i traced over screenshots for this shitpost. that is all
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It's waldy
Futur water too but not done
#welcome home#partycoffin#wally darling#welcome home arg#welcome home fanart#welcome home wally#ive had these for a teeny wally#while* uhhh wally stop invading my brain i did NOT mean to type wally but uh yeah#had future wally like that for ages already and uhhh my motivation is realyyy poopy and sucks aw man#ill make a second look for future wally too becuz idk blehhhh#i dunno wut else 2 say OH YEAH got a therapy appointment on aug 5 ANDDD my b day is on augist 28 yayyayay ANDDD one of my aunts suport me#ANDDD uh idk my sleep schedule sucks#im awake at 7AM i didnt sleep at alllllll aw darn#im soooo excited cuz clown said welcome home and i went yippieeee#i get ideas but then my brain makes me forget over and over so its a littleeee frustrating but dw ill just doodle like uh#cats with human faces or sumthin idk#wut do i dooooooo aaaaaaAaaAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
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at first getting diagnosed with cptsd was like, "yay my trauma has been validated (it always was valid)!" and i really thought that was going to be it, but then i started to do research as i do whenever i realize i have something and learned that!! the way i experience socialization is!! quite horrid actually!!
#i have had this stupid fucking rule for myself for years since i was little#''dont speak unless you're spoken to or else something bad will happen. nobody wants to hear what you have to say unless they ask''#I TELL MYSELF THAT ALL THE TIME????#AND I DIDNT REALIZE IT WASNT NORMAL#thats not something that healthy people think to themselves whenever they want to talk to people. they just talk to them#they dont tell themselves not to speak to people for fear of what may happen to them jesus christ spacie#i get so scared when i message anybody ANYTHING#bc everything and anything i wanna talk about feels so stupid why would anyone give a shit#staring at a funny joke i want to send someone for 30 fucking minutes before deleting it b/c my brain is like ''errmm who cares?''#''also they're going to yell at you for wasting their time!!!''#i sent my friend a meme once and had a panic attack (or maybe a flashback?? im still trying to figure out what they are) immediately after#this shit sucks dude. it sucks#at least im processing what happened to me. thats why it hurts so bad rn its been stockpiled for like.#2 decades#im not looking for any sympathy here im just putting it out there#so that anybody who feels the same way i do know they're not alone#ive been struggling everyday for like 2 months now (actually DEFINITELY longer)#it will get better. things just need to be taken one step at a time#i have gotten thru my worst days i have a 100% success rate#how many days have i been alive#7930#lightwork#lets keep it goin#vent#trauma tw#trauma mention#wrote this post thru a flashback btw!! dealing with them is getting easier#before i would be unable to function for days at a time!!!#with one of the most recent ones i had i was so in the thick of it i avoided everyone i knew for a week cuz i was convinced#i was an evil unlovable freak that only wanted to hurt people
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of all the star wars movies, which of them do y'all 1) enjoy the most 2) consider the best quality and 3) think you've rewatched the most. add your answers in the reblogs or replies, i'm genuinely curious how much of an overlap there is within everyone's three answers. mine don't overlap at all! they're revenge of the sith, empire strikes back, and the force awakens :^)
#len speaks#star wars#revenge of the sith#empire strikes back#the force awakens#not tagging more films than that bc i cant b bothered. incoming tag ramble ahead bc i have sw brainrot rn and im making it everyones prob❤️#i rlly struggled 2 remember if id watched tfa or aotc more. i went w/ tfa bc it was formative to me as a teen and ive seen it probably 6ish#times? whereas aotc was the first sw movie i remember (specifically the scene of obiwan serving c*nt in the bar lmao) but i've only seen it#for sure 4.5 and maybe 5.5 times. the .5 is from when i got bored after obi-wan's scene ended and ran off to go play in the mud or smthn 😭#i'm sure tfa will eventually get surpassed in number of rewatches by aotc and rots bc i don't fw the direction of the ST but that's my#current ballpark estimate of my total number of rewatches#as an adult tho if i just wanna watch a star war i'll go with aotc bc it's fun and ends semihappily and i can turn my brain off for the#spinny lightsabers. it's great background noise or for if you're sick or whatever. rots on the other hand? i won't talk through that unless#i'm quoting it with my brother and i am LOCKED IN 100% entirely entranced by it all#i almost picked rogue one for the best quality answer but i think the character writing is weaker and the facial cgi is creepy. esb beats#it by a hair imho bc of that. the vader hallway scene goes hard tho!!!#also i'm not covering shows or games or books or anything else in this post - simply the films. might ask abt shows later but that might#also give me hives bc so many of the shows suck ass and i don't rlly want ppl extolling the virtues of t.bb in my notes 💀#and yes i do think one's enjoyment and one's opinion of quality are two things that often overlap. but sometimes you just like something#bad and that's awesome. like rots is the best of the prequels by a large margin and i adore the opening and characters and many of the#scenes but that doesn't mean it's the best star wars has to offer ykwim? it's my specialest most favoritest sw movie but that doesn't blind#me to the dialogue lmfaooo
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i adopted this guy from a cardboard box on the side of the road
^^^^ he says this then instantly eats shit
#sunglasses guy -> sunny#nate was said by madi hjakfhkfs#ppl call him sunny night 2 annoy him bc he SUCKS#my failboy my cringefail boy#sunglasses guy#parkour civilization#sunny nate#evbo#im not drawing iron boots rn noooooooooooooooo#get leather instead#puppee art#NOBODY SAID THAT THOSE WERE PANTS#THEY COULD B A SKIRT WHICH IS Y HE SUCKS ASS @ PARKOUR#IM JUST SAYING HEY LISTEN 2 ME LKISTEN#y did i get attached 2 like the 1 guy who does not matter#i gave him long hair bc fuck u minecraft doesnt decide hair length I DO#parkciv#i rlly do just yap in my tags huh#im so srry 4 this cause tbh i think im the only person in the world who sees him like this#bc @ 1st i was liek damn im going 2 make him emo hehehehe#then i got bored bc he just wears a stupid hoodie so i drew more shit & then it progressed#then i gave him long hair bc cOUGH reasons#now im here & he looks nothing like his minecraft skin & thats fine i find it funny LMAO#my neck hurts#kinda#its more my shoudler cause im drawing @ a weird ablge
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So tired of bitches with zero credentials trying to tell me if I'm trans or not. Like, my gender identity has been carefully observed and confirmed by multiple people with PHDs, and I'm not sure you passed middle school. Fuck off.
#i hate cis people#you guys fucking suck#and are fucking stupid as shit#“hormones will ruin your body!”#yeah that's what I want you fucking walnut#“Your gonna mutilate yourself for the woke agenda!”#yeah#tf are you gonna do abt it?#this mutilation is state sanctioned#the process for hrt doesn't fucking magically happen#multiple highly educated people are allowing this to happen#also i fucking wanna#fucks sake#trans#transgender#transblr#trans hrt#gender affirming care#transitioning#“bu-b-but the negative effects!”#like those haven't constantly been brought up to me by medical professionals#go fuck yourself#anti truscum#transmasc#trans pride#trans anger#cishet nonsense#also I fucking hate cis men so much#you guys genuinely never cease to piss me off and disgust me#there are a total of 2 cis men I can tolerate being around
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lers that do the shit where they mock u + coo at u CANSOMEODY PUT ME DOWN
#like the fuckass ‘aww this a bad spot?’ SHIT .#OR THE FUCKING WAY THEY MOCK U N GO lmao ur so ticklish that’s gotta suck 4 u#i have so many tropes and shit eating away at the neurons in my brain.#like the fucking shit where ur laughing so hard n sputter out the involuntary ‘stop’ or ‘i cant’ AND THEY FUCKIN GO#lmao cant what😂😂 u should think abt that next time u ask 2 b tickled silly like this🤣 IMFUCKING INSANE😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭#somebody PLEEEAAAAASE put me down#tk shit#back w another milHEEEEEEELP! HELP ME!! HELPPPPPPP😭😭😭😭😭😭#silliness speaks
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i used to freehand comics all the time as a child and since the part i liked was the drawing part i would just draw panel after panel because i didn't want to stop drawing to think about icky icky words, plus the story TOTALLY still made perfect sense! to me! and noone else, but 'whoooo caaaaares omgggg its not like comics and sequantial art are a communicative meeediummmm lmaoooooo'. i spent my entire childhood telling myself stuff like "oh pfft I know this story by heart- ill SIMPLY remember the dialogue and write it later" ...and. I can't help but admire baby maiora's (call that a minora ba tm tsk) fucking audacity? hubris? confident wrongness? kid couldn't even remember to finish the comics in the first place? INCREDIBLE levels of unearned self assurance, wish that were me, genuinely- what an icon!!! anyway i think i have forever cursed myself
#maiora garrulates#the maiora overthinks the process of writing dialogue saga continues!!!!!!!#im so tired. i have been overthinking this shit in circles i have not been making any progress in any which way lmao!#im bitching and moaning for funsies this is not that serious in the Grand Scheme Of Things i just wanna improve at my fav thing#and ❤️ Unfortunately ❤️ my favorite thing in the world involves learning MY MOST HATED *NEMESIS*!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! verbal communication. ew#words are fun! i LOVE words! toys!!!!! im using words right now and i didn't combust!!!!! wow look at that!!!!!!!!!!!!!#putting words in SEQUENCE? multiple times?? filtering THOUGHTS into SENTENCES???? sentences that a character would or wouldn't SAY???#AND THEN THERE'S ANOTHER CHARACTER SOMETIMES???? AND THAT BITCH ALSO HAS THOUGHTS AND FEELINGS????? AND THEY ALL HAVE PERSONAL IDIOLECTS#AND TONES THAT S U P P O S E D L Y ARE IMPLICATED BY MANNERISMS AND VERBAL HABITS AND CIRCUMSTANCES (AND THERE'S WRONG ANSWERS! ALSO!!)#AND THEY'RE IN A CONTEXT!! AND THEY'RE INTERACTING WITH EACH OTHER AND INFLUENCING EACH OTHER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!#THE CONVERSATION COULD VARY GIVEN ENERGY LEVELS WHETER OR NOT SOMEONE'S FOOT IS FALLING ASLEEP THE F U C K I N G WEATHER#“oh dialogue is easy just say it out loud to yourself until it 'sounds normal' ^^”#screaming crying throwing up NONE OF THIS IS INTUITIVE TO MEEEEEEEEEEEeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee....!#ok dramatics over its out of my system! for now!!!#this is all easily explained bc i just. draw a lot more than i talk to people. so like. OBVIOUSLY i have more practice drawing#so drawing comes natural! talking does not! subsequently dialogue is Hard! No FUCKING Shit Sherlock!!!!! (affectionate)#so yeah. im using y'all (the tumblr void) as practice! hi!!! words at you!!!!!!!!!!#so yeah thanks for baring with me while passing by my corner of the internet#i do love self indulgence this is fun check out my navel gazing actually no do not look at my belly button#anyway i just think this is mildly interesting. some of my writer buds have the same “not good enough” allergy towards visuals#but they use it to be mean2me >:( same bitch that “omg i cant i suck at drawing i can't do this-” does the “uhm. just write? lol.” 2 meeee#we could have peace and love on planet earth and a common experience and yet you KICK miette for being bad at words!!!1!!! </3 heartbreak!!#what the fuck was i talking about even#oh yeah. perfectionism within creatives i guess. LMAO JK i am talking about NOTHIN!!!!G i am just putting Words Out Here ehehehehehe#its practice >;)c#all this bc ive been doodling comics for myself again and im V!! PROUD OF THE ART!!!! wanna share- but DIALOGUE!*⚡sfx!!*....... so! options#a) leaving it blank. no there are NO microphones in the budget. b) leaving blank *balloons* so that the Rythm is there. implied convo!!!#c) ...doing it badly. (tragic)(heartwrenching)(teeny tiny bruise 2 the ego) *dramatic single tear cleches fists * its the only way.........#...we shall see! literally none of this is all that serious i am procrastinating!! <3 playing with my tuoys!!!!!!!! silly time!!!#/all lh! am reaching 30 tags so that is all for THIS episode of the maiora bitches about dialogue saga thank you for joining me!!okilyBuhBY
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#ugh. fuck me im so tired. im getting sucked back into that workaholic mindset and now my body hurts and my nerves are fying. but it feels#good to b productive. if only i didnt have to teach and could just work with data :-(#anyway. the last 2 weeks have been good in that i feel like im actually hitting my stride a bit#bc we're seeing cool things in our genomes and its gonna b really fun to explore. and i met with the terrifying#prof who is on my committee to pitch a project for a final in her class and it seems it went over well. it was kinda funny bc we were#meeting and she was like: so how would u tell which gene was lost 1st? the phytochrome or the genes that r triggered by activation? and i#was like: uhhhhh idk. and then my advisor walked by and she grabbed him and asked him the same question and he was like: idk we'll have to#figure it out. which made me feel way better abt not knowing lol. then my superior lab mate asked me a question abt taking confocal images#and i was actually able to figure out what her issue was. and my old advisor was asking me if i knew anyone to ask for using a pam on cyanos#and i was like: here is what i think my advisor would say and linked her a paper. then i asked my advisor and he said what i expected and#linked the paper that id already sent. so im like. ok. ok. maybe i actually sometimes do kno what im doing. sorta.#and then my old advisor said she was so proud of me. and i was like aw. its so funny bc my relationship is so different with my new advisor#hes great but its all very professional. with my old advisor i would text her after hours bc she was a workaholic like me and went on long#car rides and handed out Halloween candy with her. she was more hands on and doesnt have kids so work is her life. its just interesting#so things have been going well. but there arent enough hours in the day. and my committee meeting is in like 16 days. and i am afraid for#that but not as afraid as i was in april when i had a full on breakdown and canceled it the day before it was set to happen lol#itll b fine. i just have to work thru the weekend so i can get my preproposal done. and prey that the fucking splitstree download site will#start working bc i want to do gene networks dammit#unrelated
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so was anybody going to tell me how beautiful gyala delve is?
#gw2#guild wars 2#screens#i fumbled my way through the meta for the anguish that festers and was just. astounded by how gorgeous it is while looting#couldnt even log out to re-enable reshade bc it wouldve booted me from the successful map w no toxic gunk#these are just raw screens w a couple photoshop layers#im SOOOOOOOO MAD the meta sucks complete ass. like genuinely one of the worst events ive ever subjected myself to#i would totally cruise around here doing it if a) it wasnt awful b) it gave even SLIGHTLY decent loot
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Heritage implies age, these aren’t heritage posts they’re just posts you like
you aren't wrong, i've just decided that maybe that's okay tbh
#not a heritage post#ask#anon#i am fully aware of this. three reasons some of the posts on here are pretty new:#a) season 2 just came out and tumblr's search function sucks. most of the posts i'm seeing after literal *hours* of searching today are new#b) some of those^ posts have got like 20k notes in 24 hours. they may not be old but they're already iconic (ive seen them reposted already#c) it's my blog so im ok with some of the posts just being posts i like :)))#if u want to see older posts then filter the blog for “GO1” or “book omens” and you will get all the ones i've found so far!!#but yeah. idk if there are widely accepted universal criteria for what makes something a heritage post. until someone shows me the rulebook#i am making them up as i go :)))#anyway SORRY im rambling just thought id put that out there until tumblr makes it easier to search for stuff there will probably be at leas#some new posts on here and if u just wanna see the older posts then search for the respective tag on the blog :)))
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the only downside 2 having someone i love is that now i have to fear death n actually care when my body does things it shouldnt
#for once i can say i dont want 2 die#whihc is actually kinda scary#but i want to stay alive 2 spend more time w them#i want to learn more from them#i want to just exist alongside them#but that SUCKS for a fuck it if i die i die boy#i have been just been sleeping off every health issue i have ever had no matter how near-fatal it got but now i have to b like ugugh doctor#save me for i need 2 see my love once more#on the other hand i know if i died i would b a ghost my love is too strong i care too much it is a lovely agony itd keep me here man
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Hate having adhd went to go work on my fallout modpack, got distracted while going to disable the steam overlay, ended up in the points shop, went to go edit my profile, decided to change my pfp, found a buried folder I forgot existed, found some old Veneer art I forgot existed, spent 45 minutes looking at all the old photos, STILL HAVE NOT TOGGLED ONE SIMPLE OPTION THAT SHOULD'VE TAKEN 30 SECONDS AT MOST
#I'm shocked I have these drawings scanned on my pc I don't remember doing that I must've done it before I left in case my mom threw all my#Art out again#Anyway at age 12 I was writing a better '3 merpeople go on land to find a 4th one that has been disguised as a human all his life' story#Than Ma/ko Merm/aids EVER did so uh. Take that Jonathan#God it sucks so bad that kid me would've LOVED MM if it just DIDN'T HAVE THE STUPID GENDER WAR BULLSHIT#Literally the entire first and second season is just. So fucking stupid. I wrote a God damn essay about how they fumbled Erik's story SO BAD#I don't even LIKE Erik BUT THEY DID HIM SO DIRTY#THE CHARACTER POTENTIAL AND WRITING COULD'VE BEEN BETTER THAN ZANE B. S1 OF H2O BUT THEY THREW IT AWAY AND FOR WHAT!!!!!!!#Seriously you're telling me a kid who was abandoned his entire life for being male didn't have a bigger impact on the pod than FUCKING ZAK?#That plot twist of 'oh actually Zak was a merman all along' was 100% so they could guilt free write Erik out#Instead of like. Having him face his actions or redeem himself in like. Any way. He just fucks off. THEN the pod is like lol Zac were sorry#We're sorry for literally not doing anything to you because you were privledged enough to have a mother who was super ultra powerful#So you were never really affected by our actions until JUST now. Unlike that other fuckface Erik who suffered his whole life alone#Also then in s3 there are STILL no mermen in the pod. Not even little mermen babies. No kids and teens they've welcomed back n apologized to#NOTHING#God. Mm pisses me off dude#AND I STILL HAVENT TOGGLED THAT FUCKING OPTIONS AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH#Cruddy rambles#God I'm not done I'm sorry fallout can wait YOU ARE TELLING ME THE GUY WHO TELLS US HOW SHITTY MERMAN BABIES R TREATED BY THE POD. IS NOT#THE SAME ONE THE POD APOLOGIZES TO IN THE SEASON FINALE BECAUSE THEY WROTE IN A SHITTY PLOT TWIST?#AUUUUUUUHHHHGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG#It's so bad. It's so fucking bad. It's so needlessly gendered and for what. They could've just had 2 rival warring pods#What pisses me off the most is that s3 (4) completely pivots and never really follows thru with the s1 and 2 story arcs#The writers just kinda wash thsir hands of that because 'hey the pod said sorry to zac' BUT THEN NOTHING ACTUALLY CHANGES!!!!#Maybe instead of having a constantly rotating cast of characters s3 (4) could've instead focused on Ondina and Erik's relationship a bit#Maybe have Ondina tell him she wants to just stay friends because she can't trust him. Have him IDK grow and change as a character?#Maybe so you can show kids nobody is born evil and we all need support systems and healthy relationships to grow and become better people??#THAT would've been a GOOD FOLLOW THROUGH#But no instead u just write him out of the show and never show any OTHER mermen who were exiled being welcomed back#Like u had Ondina becoming a teacher... Why not have Zac become a teacher for all the new mermen who were just recently welcomed back??
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okay guys so heres the thing. if i am having fun and being happy over a post and you come in my inbox and say something rude about how im enjoying something you're getting blocked lol. i have been veeeeeeeery nice so far. i dont know why you're following me if you're gonna make a stink when i reblog/make art/talk abt something i like. why are you here. you know. the blog where i talk/reblog/make art abt the things i like. if you dont like it here instead of telling me. leave. be a decent person, okay?
#spacie spoinks#mood killer#just got a very very rude ask like what is up w/ppl and springtrap its only when its abt him#the ask was literally like ''yeah i hate this thing that you like so there''#????? okay?????#i have spam reblogged other posts and not a peep abt how ''ohhh this thing sucks actually why are you enjoying it :/''#litrally shut up!!!!!!! go away im having fun what's wrong with you!!!#this wont ruin my mood b/c haaarhouguohg that art.....#also . what is up w/ppl and bringing up being aroace in their anons when talking abt springtrap 😭😭#IM ALSO AROACE!!!!! YOU FOOLS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!#''im not simping for him im aroace'' you are literally looking at an aroace rn#do i need 2 make more posts abt being aroace. is that it.#would you guys finally believe me if i told you that IN REAL LIFE i do not find most humans attractive sexually or romantically?#smh#anybeans :333#spins around with basyas drawing in my hand oh how i love him#im gonna put this in a frame#im. i need a corkboard so i can jut have a collage . on my fwall
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I promise I'm working on a writeblr intro post, but I want it to be super fancy and have banners and link wip summaries to individual wip intro posts so it's really taking a While
#it frustrates me#i have the intro fully written#i have intros for my 2 main wips mostly written#i do not have the banners because:#a) i suck at editing pictures#b) i can't find a backdrop i like#so yeah this is where we're at#ramblies#not writing
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