#succulent swap

[escondidolibrary]

Love Succulents? Bring clippings of your favorite succulents to pot, trade, and share with fellow plant lovers on Saturday, July 1, 2:00 to 4:00 p.m. in front of the Library!

Small containers of dirt will be provided while supplies last. Participating in this free event counts as a point for the Adult Summer Reading Challenge! https://library.escondido.org/summer.aspx

Sponsored by the Friends of the Escondido Public Library.

[koolades-world]

Random Obey Me! Headcannons

Lucifer really likes human world blue cheese but refuses to admit it because he knows he will be made fun of for it by his brothers

Mammon has his first dollar he made in the Devildom framed and when Mc found it while looking for condoms he was really embarrassed

Idk it’s so funny to me to think of Mc and Mammon about to have sexy time and they need to go look for a condom. Mammon swears he has some so Mc goes digging though a drawer and finds a framed dollar bill while butt naked

“Mammon what is this-”

“SHIT UNSEE THAT HUMAN”

Levi has neck and back pains from all the gaming he does and really loves massages but is too scared to ask

Satan once stole a pair of Lucifer’s underwear and hung it from the RAD flagpole

Asmo made it a point to introduce Mc into his nightly routine as his face mask buddy, even to the point of doing it over call if they’re separated

This also sounds funny as shit imagine someone like Levi walking in on that

“So anyways, I stomped their skull in and got blood on my new boots. My hands also hurt from wringing the neck of that-”

“Asmo, Lucifer wants to know- HOLY SHIT WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO YOU”

“A face mask, Levi. You could use one”

Beel loves kids and likes it when they use him as a jungle gym

Belphie always kicks people in his sleep without fail. Mammon swears he does it on purpose but knows he doesn't

Simeon does the best hair braids and is regarded the best in the Celestial Realm

Luke hates girl scout cookies since he thinks homemade cookies are so much better

Solomon can be seen leaving Asmo's room at any point during the day but nobody ever sees him going in. Imagine hanging out with Asmo and Solomon just fucking appears and then disappears just as fast

Diavolo's favorite color is pink

Barbatos has a succulent garden and Mc will bring him a new one every time they come back from the human world

Thirteen definitely loves Mexican food and spice in general

Raphael is convinced soft blankets are the best thing to ever exist

Mephisto once accidently knocked over one of Luke's cakes and felt so bad that he sent Purgatory Hall a buttload of money and wrote an article in the RAD newspaper about how great the angels were at baking

Mammon and Lucifer openly hate white chocolate (because it's not chocolate). Satan does too but pretends to like it because Lucifer likes it

Whenever Satan needs a parter to go to the events he gets invited to, Mc and Asmo are his first choices. He's closest with Asmo (Belphie is a second close) and doesn't mind the fanfare

Asmo and Beel often travel around the Devildom together. Asmo can't eat everything he orders since he just wants pictres so Beel is the ideal companion. Beel is also the perfect body guard

Solomon's current favorite liquor is Fireball and always has some on hand, but Luke always hides it because he thinks drinking is a bad habit

Barbatos definitely listens to heavy metal but everyone thinks he listens to classical music

If my grandmothers met the brothers, Beel would be their fav because he would clean his plate but if it was everyone, Simeon would take it home because he’s so charming even though he’s barely clothed

Everyone is so downbad for Mc I think it might scare off other people how much they hover. Like, a lower demon bothering you? Literally anything could happen to them, like they could be thrown in an endless loop of suffering, they could be made dirt poor for eternity, or they could be torn limb from limb <3 gotta love it

Asmo and Belphie make a deadly duo when to comes to trapping people/demons/angels. They both have the power to lure you in, and would probably take turn luring in victims for an evening as some sort of strange brother bonding. They both remind me of angler fish in a way. Asmo lures them with the pretense of sex and Belphie with relaxation, two things people can’t get enough of and they can stay calm enough to pull it off

Solomon has definitely made the brothers swap bodies or something crazy like that, on accident or not, you decide

Whenever Mc is feeling down, Diavolo offers his man titties as a nice pillow to relax on because he read somewhere once humans liked that

Beel is like a bull in a china shop so do not take him anyway where you need to be delicate. Belphie knows this, and will put him to sleep and carry him when they need to go somewhere like an antique shop by promising him a snack afterwards

Beel thinks Satan, Belphie, and Mc make the best weights out of everyone. Satan will just read, Belphie will just sleep, and Mc is like his personal cheerleader. However, he can and will lift all his brothers and Mc and the same time if he wants to, it’s just difficult to get them all in the same place at the same time

Thirteen, Belphie, and Satan got in a prank war once and it had to end in a draw since one party could not best the other. In the end, they made a final, collaborative prank and pulled it on Solomon

Mc once fell down the stairs in the human realm, ended up in the hospital, and sent the entire cast into panic so much that they took turns watching over them

Mephisto and Mc once had a night out drinking together and (somehow) returned to the HoL but were totally smashed. Lucifer forbid them from doing it again, but they still sneak out together and just crash at Mephiso’s place instead

[mothiir]

I have a request for Night Lord/BT serf swaps. From either side. I want to see the serfs being so confused and scared (and maybe a bit aroused too).

i felt so genuinely mean writing this :’) poor sock machine cannot catch a break.

cw: noncon, night lords being night lords.

—

—

“For the last time,” Shrike says, “I did not eat our serf!”

“She vanished without a trace,” Zakyr says. “And you’re the one always threatening to devour her —“

“I say I am going to eat her cunt, that means something very different — look, the room stinks of the warp, clearly something happened last jump, and I am sure it will switch back soon! And until it does we have the other succulent little mortal —“

“Are you really so faithless?” Vanatas growls. “You are the one who tattooed the wench with your approximation of art; I thought you would want to hesitate before getting your cock wet with some other piece of cunt!”

“…yes,” Zakyr says, apparently unmoved in the face of his brother’s moral grandstanding. “Who would do such a thing. Who would have a serf that they apparently like so much that they get stroppy if they cannot have her pet their hair while they sleep, only to clamber atop of the next warm body when she was not available?”

Vanatas huffs, then moans. “Oh, that’s it — no, it is different. I — fuck — I found her, she’s mine, it’s just —“

He moans; the sound almost loud enough to drown out the pathetic snivelling of the strange woman in his lap, riding him. She wears a white tunic, with a black cross stitched into it; her skirt has been torn aside. She wasn’t wearing undergarments, something Vanatas considered a sign from the Night Haunter that clearly this girl was destined for him.

“Hurts,” she mumbles, in Gothic, and Vanatas — whose grasp of the language has improved dramatically since Zakyr demanded ‘sharing the serf’ as payment for his translation services — leans forward to whisper in her ear.

“Good. Yes. Take it. Take me. All the way inside you, keep crying, you’re going to make me cum —“

Shrike pouts. “You don’t think any of that is true—you just don’t want to share!”

“I saw her first, she’s mine. And when the other one comes back, then we’ll keep this one and she can have a friend! Human women like being kept in pairs, I think.”

Shrike glowers, fumbling with his crotch plate, sending it clattering to the ground. He takes himself in hand, ignoring Zakyr’s protests — he might not be able to fuck this new serf yet, but he can make everyone else incredibly uncomfortable, and that will have to do for now.

—

“So…I mend socks?” you say, eyes wide.

“Yes. Just that — wait, why are you hugging me?”

[saelterlude]

Happy first anniversary to the Link Click Musical!! To celebrate, here is a list of all the specials official recordings that they have given us!

Kay so starting with

Chinese Musical Promo Special Livestream: (I forgot the name of the event hehe)

Faith of Friendship by Wang Minhui and Cai Qi

Words Can't Convey My Love by Shu Rongbo and Wu Yihan (they play these two songs straight, but no worries its not the case for the other proper specials held by encore musical)

100th Performances Countdown Specials: (Yes, this week was a blessing)

Words Cant Convey My Love with LG-CXS swap (roles not character if that makes sense) by WMH, Bai Zhuoming and Wu Hanglu (dont you love seeing wmh cocky confidence slowly and surely crumbles lol, bzm got the rights to get mad at him in the end)

Words Cant Convey My Love with LG->CXS->the girl and QL-> LG by Du Guangyi, Wang Yifei, and Qian Anqi (lets be real wyf took us all by surprise with that entrance and the oh~. its also the source of shy lg in cxs jacket. dont forget the failed streamer disaster lmao)

Faith of Friendship with a push up bet for every ball missed by Teng Chunpeng and DGY (aksnsjks the stupid star formation is great, and the multiple failed shots plss. i love their goofy asses so much)

Forget About It with LG->CXS->QL->LG by WYH, Ding Xingchen and Deng Xialin (i love dxc's twin sister, shes pretty shes great. wyh being a hyper orange cat on stage is also great, dont forget the meme that came from it)

Forget About It with various dialects by Guo Hongxu, Ji Xiaokun and Cai Lu (its the closest thing we've got to how the actual performance goes! special mention go cl needing to read the lyrics off her phone)

As The Saying Goes with CXS as Chen Xiao and everyone else as CX's mom by CQ WMH, DXL, Zhang Jiahao and Zhu Jiayan (chickenchickenchicken, peak comedy, i love wmh going all asian mom lmaooo, yess scold cq into a chokehold!)

Valentine Special:

Words Cant Convey My Love with LG->the girl QL->LG and CXS as CX by DGY, TCP and WHL (dgy wjth the high pitched voice, the almost kiss, the fckin succulent, the fake retching, its perfect)

200th Performances Special:

Words Cant Convey My Love with CXS->Liu Meng, LG taking the confessing role and QL->LG by WMH, GHX and DXL (i love how cheeky ghx looks, and how everyone burst out laughing when he enters. ghx is just terrorizing wmh this whole performance)

300th Performances Special:

Trump Card with CXS and LG hanging by TCP, DGY, WHL, ZJY and Zhou Bo (dgy core strength took me by surprise, its a mess)

1 Year Anniversary Special:

This 15 minutes video contains: (watch me struggle to describe this loveable mess here)

Words Can't Convey My Love by ZJH, Guo Zheyan, and DXL with mahjong cameos (shiguang is in the walls. i promise, it makes sense, its chaos, i love it) by GHX, BZM, ZHB, YHL

Faith of Friendship (doubled! theres too many of them!! and zhb is so tiny wtf. none of them can shoot, wheres basketball god when you need him) by GHX, BZM, ZHB, YHL

Back to The Past by CQ and WMH with WMH belting it whilst a group of raincoat wearing menaces (GHX, ZHB, YHL, CQ) does some cult ritual nonsense. (i am not joking, wmh is singing this angsty song on the verge of tears and getting bullied)

Also, Dive Back in Time with everyone!! (its very cramped lmao)

Bonus! If you prefer it to Weibo, here is a YouTube playlist for the specials posted by niebo! Happy 1st anniversary Link Click Musical! I know I haven't keep up with the clip list but damn I gotta do something.

[scarlovebot]

SATISFIED OPPOSITES

Natasha Romanoff x Female Reader

Summary: Natasha and you have your differences yet still remain similar

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* ✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* ✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* ✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* ✧

some may describe you and your girlfriend as complete opposites, Natasha remains calm with a bitten tongue whereas yourself, a high energy and hot headed individual.

when chaos ensues the red heads concern is finding the problem and solution - however ninety percent of the time you are the root of all trouble.

Natasha buries her emotions below the surface level, not allowing the worries to be heard by anyone else. In those moments you guide her head above water and let it all spill out, because there is no need to let the anxieties eat her alive.

Your girlfriend would rather love stay within four walls, the intimacy only reaching as far the compound. Her constant touch and admiring words are seen to those she trusts, the lucky few being considered family at the compound.

The love for Natasha has no extent, your fingers are constantly caught up in her auburn hair, her plump grazed lips must be kissed and it’s necessary to remain skin on skin at any given moment.

stars shine bright into the compound lounge, reflecting its light upon the New York skyline. After a strenuous four hour mission debrief you gave yourself the reward of a movie night, slumped against Natasha.

the movie choice of tonight had very little thought on your behalf, opting to use this time wisely to soak up every minute of Natasha’s radiance.

A delicate hand found comfort on your waist, prickling fingers rubbed the newly scarred armour from a recent mission, unknowingly sending you into a haze.

Natasha knew of your sensitivity around self image, seeing yourself as a morphed villain distraught at the reflection in the mirror. she made it her personal mission to combat the devilish thoughts that ruminated around your mind, you were her saviour with no trace of a monster in sight.

the image you held up had been swapped for softness, allowing the person you push down to appear.

Natasha’s gaze shifts from the television to your face, your eyes fluttering with tiredness. Her other hand travels beneath the blanket which solidified you two together, with a gentle push she turned your limp body to face forward in her direction.

as though it was love at first sight all over again, your eyes gleam with a passion and lips curl in admiration.

hushing into your ear Natasha speaks “моя любовь, do you want to call it a night?” she questions with tenderness.

Lost in her dazzling emerald eyes and cursive russian words you take a few seconds to register, simply nodding your head in a slow motion, indicating the rush of sleep that began to take over.

succulent lips pressed against your temple, letting out a sigh of contentment. Natasha’s tough yet delicate hands held on tightly to your waist, encapsulated in safety.

within seconds you were brought to her chest, legs tightening around her pelvis with your arms wrapping around her noticeably marked neck.

giggling in a child like manner at the sight your antics from previous events, the red head rolls her eyes knowing exactly what has gotten you into this state.

Before every act of affection natasha makes it clear that she has given consent, free rein at whatever you would pursue in those moments of lust.

She trusts you fully yet makes it clear for your benefit that by no means have you taken advantage, being taught that she can say ‘no’ - Natasha no longer has her choices of rights taken from her.

Arriving at your humble abode, a bedroom filled with countless memories most of which pictured on the walls, the room being a sacred space for you and your girlfriend.

Almost instantly you recognise the change of touch, the bed offering comfort yet not enough to make you feel at peace.

Lights dimmed down and warmth surrounded your body, legs interlaced to one another and a homely pair of arms pulled you into a slow rhythmic chest.

Hands roam to Natasha’s back, creating intricate patterns and grazing your fingernails in the process of lulling to sleep.

“Goodnight малыш, i love you” she spoke, sending a shiver down your spine.

Your lips dragged across her chin then to her own, you kiss her with passion and affection.

Humming with satisfaction as a partial response “y/n, you’re allowed remember. you are always allowed дорогой” she says in a whispered tone.

Tiredness had been overridden by desire, the one in which you craved so deeply for each other.

The nighttime carried on for hours, falling to slumber after both felt accomplishment. wrapped up in each others limbs, discarding the duvet cover and undergarments and instead, radiance circling the pair.

whether love is pronounced or kept under covers, your fulfilled with the oppositions of the person who lay by you every night.

[dicenne]

Dicenne, or should I say, Captain Azeroth's performance from Succulent Tart's After Dark on 11/16/2024

Also doubling as my Day #1 for November DWC! Word & Warning: Sexy

Sure enough, Captain Azeroth struts onto the stage in all his superhero glory, like he just stepped straight off the page of a comic book! Impeccably coiffed blond hair, baby blue eyes, a slightly stubbled cheek to emphasize that sharp jaw but also maintain a more rugged look, and the blue, red, and white uniform fitted snugly against his chiseled body. It’s obviously Dicenne, but he sure does look picture-perfect! The round shield strapped to his back tops of the entire ensemble as a bright spotlight backlights him, creating a statuesque silhouette.

He strikes a confident pose: Hands on his hips, shoulders back, chin up, and gaze fixated off into the distance as the spotlight slowly fades and he gives a salute. He strikes a few of Captain Azeroth’s most iconic, battle-ready poses. Removing his shield and holding it at the ready, he turns his back to the audience and offers a hardened look over his shoulder - and an excellent view of that beautifully sculpted rear end, hugged tight and accentuated by those blue pants: That is most definitely Azeroth’s ass.

As the next song begins to build, he holds his pose and a playful little grin tugs at one corner of those plush lips. Once the driving beat finally kicks in, hips begin to rock in a suggestive sway. With a brief prep, he vaults off of his free hand into a backwards handspring, keeping his shield tucked in against his body. When both boots hit the stage he immediately pivots and jumps into a soaring whirlwind kick: Spinning 540 degrees while taking off, kicking, and then landing all on the same leg.

He touches down gracefully and returns the shield to its holster against his back. He falls forwards, catching himself with his hands before his body smacks into the stage and promptly begins some reps of push-ups. Regular push-ups quickly turn into clap push-ups, where at the peak of the move both hands push off the ground and clap together, and eventually ends with doing one-handed push-ups, swapping from right to left with each repetition.

Both hands return to the stage and he kicks up into a balanced handstand, dropping legs forward and back into a stag split. In this new position, he resumes his push-ups, showcasing the extreme strength and discipline he possesses in not just both arms, but in his entire body as well. This man is not even breaking a sweat, this is just a warm-up!

He completes the walkover and falls to his knees at the front of the stage. Gloved hands grope down the sides of his neck, over his chest, and over the tops of those thick thighs before slipping between and spreading his knees wide open. Sitting back against his heels, he unclasps his gloves and pulls them free from his hands, chucking them towards the wings of the stage. 

Cap's now bare hands claw up along his inner thighs, over top the generous swell of his crotch, back over his chest and up the front of his neck. All the while his torso and hips resume a gyrating and grinding motion, dragging a hand across his lips and catching the tip of his finger between his teeth as he gives a devilish wink to the crowd. A pleasing mix of strength and sensuality, Captain Azeroth clearly knows how to work a crowd!

That enticing, baby blue gaze surveys the audience before hopping up and running to the edge of the stage where he jumps, rotating mid-air twice around with his body in a spinning flip, positioned nearly parallel to the ground until the last moment. He lands in the quintessential superhero pose: One knee on the ground, opposite fist on the ground, back arm slightly raised; he plays the part well!

Now on his feet, he points to Fiorenze and then Sana, beckoning them to join him at the front and positioning them on either side of him, all facing the audience. Kneeling behind them, he coaxes them to sit on his shoulders and hold on!

He curls his arms up around their thighs, keeping his biceps parallel to the ground so they have an easier time staying in place. He then stands up, lifting them off the ground and keeping them firmly held atop his shoulders and arms, turning his back to the audience. Easily holding the pose for a while longer, he executes a series of deep squats to flaunt those powerful legs and, more importantly, those perfectly forged glutes. Those cheeks are just asking for gold coins to be bounced off of them! With one final squat, he sets them both down and allows them to return to their seats, but not before offering a kiss to their knuckles for being such lovely volunteers.

He returns to the stage, removing his shield to rest face down on the ground nearby. Hands reach behind his back, fiddling with something along his spine as he smirks at the audience, hips still popping to that lively beat. His collar and the sides of that leather top immediately go slack and he’s able to pull the garment down his arms, freeing it entirely from his person. Chiseled muscles glisten beneath the spotlight, the contours of his abs more prominent today than usual. The tight leather pants ride low on his body, emphasizing the cut V-line of his hips that disappears beneath the garment. The red runic tattoo that typically covers his right side is even glamoured away to more align his look with the character he’s portraying.

Captain Azeroth stomps on the curved edge of his shield so it flips up, then catches and affixes it to his right arm, giving the straps an extra hard yank to keep it in place. Sauntering down the stairs to seek his next subject, he stops in front of Talthorn and offers his free hand out to bring them up on stage with him. Kneeling down, the shield is raised and braced atop his shoulder, creating a nice parallel platform of which he then urges his volunteer to sit upon.

After they get comfortable, he rises up from his knees to stand at his full height all while keeping his shield and participant balanced. But he doesn’t stop there! Freeing his arm from the straps, he grips opposite edges of the shield and begins to lift it, and its passenger, steadily over top of his head! His rippling obliques tense and tighten, pronouncing themselves even further with the effort. With a bit of adjusting and balancing until hands are at the center of the shield, he gradually retracts his right hand, balancing shield and Talthorn over his head with only his left arm!

He flashes the audience a triumphant grin, then swaps left arm to right arm without even looking or bobbling his aloft companion! He could do this all day! Gradually he lowers his shield in the same manner it was lifted, kneeling and bracing it atop his shoulder so they could have an easier dismount. With a respectful salute, he sends them back to their seat and sets his shield aside.

He wastes no time in running to the front of the stage, jumping and appearing as if he’s just about to dive into the crowd. At the last moment, he tucks his legs into a stall front flip, landing on both feet just in front of %t before dropping onto his knees to straddle their thighs. That brawny torso rolls in excruciatingly slow waves in order to accentuate those impressive abs, welcoming his current subject to touch if they so desire. Dexterous fingers are quick to unfasten his utility belt, yanking it off and draping it around %t’s neck, bestowing one final grind of his bared flesh flush against them.

He returns to the stage and with his back to the audience, he slowly lowers into a crouch; knees spread with hands resting upon his knees and an alluring glance given over his shoulder. With a bounce, he *SLAPS* his hands down against his inner thighs and as he stands, there’s a POP-POP-POPPING sound of buttons unsnapping. You guessed it, pants are abruptly ripped away from his person, revealing his marvelously muscular and shapely rear *almost* in its full glory! The small strip and triangle of blue fabric of his thong does not leave anything to the imagination, at least on his backside. Azeroth’s ass indeed!

Cap turns to face the audience, the blue thong with white mesh stars leaves very little to the imagination. Yes, Captain Azeroth is absolutely gifted with abundance and the material does very little to contain the overflow. He picks up his shield and paces around the front of the stage, scanning the audience with a flirtatious expression, welcoming and encouraging the lascivious gazes and wicked thoughts. Those powerful muscles flex with every movement; a flawless body passionately sculpted by duty and by tenacity over the years.

He conceals his ample groin with his shield, free hand beckoning the audience to shout out what they want before fingertips begin to fiddle with what one can assume is the side of his thong. Captain Azeroth isn’t so innocent after all!

Cap tugs at the edge of the material, and with a soft *snap*, he pulls the thong free from behind the shield, giving it a twirl and releases it towards, probably, Leon. As is custom. 

Is he? Isn’t he? Everyone has already seen a good amount of bare flesh this evening. The chivalry is strong, but so is the eroticism.

He gives a bow, keeping himself covered with the shield, probably much to the dismay of some. …BUT! He then does turn to one side and then to the other for his final bows, purposefully allowing tantalizing, shadowed glimpses of that legendary length now fully freed behind his shield. Captain Azeroth sure has a tremendous ~and~ tempting…talent! He wasn’t going to walk away without at least a teasing peek! Turning to walk off stage, he offers one final glimpse of his delectable, unclad backside before disappearing behind the curtain.

@succulent-tart @fio-renze @twosidedsana @talthorn-sylvoran @daily-writing-challenge

[mslanna]

Raphael returning to the House of Hope as a blushy mess after an encounter with his little mouse and Haarlep needling him about it to try to get a reaction. Maybe the incubus's initial attempts don't get much of a reaction beyond Raphael telling them to just be quiet and so Haarlep suggests that maybe they should have their way with the moral to see what all the fuss is about, which is what caused Raphael's composure to break for a moment as he snarls a 'Don't you dare' or something. Then Haarlep could just needle him further by commenting on the cambion's strong reaction and teasing that maybe they should get Tav's form as it might be the only way to get Raphael to top them for a change.

A second part to this prompt ficlet... (also available on AO3)

Do That Mouth Mouse

Raphael stared at the space Tav had occupied moments ago. His mouth still tingled from their unexpected assault. Such indolence! How dare a mere mortal lay hands on him like that!

Only Tav had not laid hands on him. Something he regretted more than he admitted. With a wave of his hand, Raphael dismissed Korrilla and Yurgir. Something inside him was about to explode and he needed his servants whole.

With long strides, he stalked into his House of Hope. Everything was still in order. The only thing Tav had taken were his Gloves of Giant Hill Strength. Easy enough to replace. Helsik would return them as she did every time. Such a simple plan to unmask intruders.

Raphael stared at the Gloves of the Tyrant. Did Tav think he wouldn't notice they swapped them? And whatever was he going to do with them? The reason he tried them on was of course to check on their abilities. Not because Tav might have used them, might have had their hands touch what he touched now.

The kiss lingered. Unexpected. Unapologetic. Unrestrained. At least the reason that his mouth was wide open for Tav was that he had been talking. Nothing else. Raphael put the gloves back. Maybe he should get his body back in line. Feed it familiar relief to overwrite new desires. He was a devil. By the hells, he would act like one.

Raphael strode into the boudoir, where Haarlep perked up on the luxurious bed. Their red skin bled into the red sheets and though their services were excellent and never failed, Raphael hesitated. The delicious tension that budded in his body, seeped away at the sight of his personal incubus.

"Look who has deigned to return." Haarlep looked him over. "Long day?"

"Are you asking me?" Raphael decided to switch tracks. Haarlep had been busy earlier. Finding out why when there were no guests on his schedule might be a good distraction from other unexpected guests.

"My, my. Somebody is grumpy." Haarlep opened their arms. "Come. Let me make it go away."

"Is that what you offered your earlier guest?" The devil stalked towards his incubus. "And what did you take away? Their soul? Their form? Everything?"

"I knew you'd be feeling that one." Unrepentant, Haarlep slid of the bed. "I made sure you would. A little something since you couldn't be there in person."

"And why would I want that?"

"Now, now. Who has ben raving about a little mortal mouse day and night lately?" The incubus exaggerated a thoughtful face. "Oh right. It was you. So when your morsel appeared on my doorstep, well what a disservice to us all to just let them go."

Raphael hissed. "Tav was here?"

"Wasn't that obvious. I mean, you did meet them on their way out?"

That Raphael had. The memory would not go under. Now it was joined by the echoes of the pleasure he had felt earlier. His little mouse. His incubus. What a waste. "And what, pray tell, did you take? Not their soul, that much I know."

"Unfortunately not, no. Such a succulent soul that one has." Haarlep licked their lips. "But I was good. Such a good pet." They came up to their master and rubbed suggestively against his side. "I got you a sweet little present. Do you want to see it?"

"A mere copy," Raphael cloaked the hum of his body with disdain.

"Perfect to the last detail," Haarlep purred into his ear. They transform a hand and run it down the devil's chest.

Raphael stiffened though he knew that even this told Haarlep everything they needed to know.

"How very possessive." The incubus wound around their tense master. "What a shame to let all this aggressive energy go to waste." Their hands slipped below Raphael's belt. "When we could be having so much fun."

"Fun for you maybe," Raphael spit with more conviction than he felt. His thoughts were already miles away, tasting Tav's mouth and skin and everything.

"Oh, I think you will enjoy yourself as well." Haarlep thrust the transformed hand down Raphael's trousers through the tail hole. The devil jerked, but didn't move away.

"It was rather difficult to get my name from their lips," Haarlep continued. "They kept calling for you."

"Did they now." The kiss invading his mouth still lingered in Raphael's mind. "Then it may be time to let them know what they missed."

He took a step towards his incubus and waved a hand. It was all Haarlep needed. They changed and did not bother with the harness. Tav stood before the devil, naked and mischief in their eyes.

"I told them I will find out how they work, what gets them going and makes them sweat." Haarlep turned slowly, displaying their new form.

"Then let's not make you a liar." Raphael trailed a finger down Tav's arm. Even Haarlep's voice matched that of his unruly annoyance. With a little imagination, it would them under his fingers. "Let's find out all of the things that make them weak."

And whine. And writhe under him. And cry his name in desperate need. Raphael had many images in his mind and Tav would feel them all.

[unjest]

GUY SALE!!!

ive got a handful of guys i drew maybe once like 5 years ago and then never did anything with them ever. so i decided to fix em up a bit and put em up as adopts! design names are based on what i called them when i originally drew them lol

i dont have any particular price in mind for these, so feel free to offer whatever via dms! if we're mutuals, i'd also be willing to take art or character trades instead of usd at a 1 for 1 swap

on purchase, you'd be receiving an isolated image of your guy without the colored filter! id also be willing to make minor color or pattern edits for no additional charge c:

Para-Sight: AVAILABLE McMike (tawny frogmouth + pallas cat griffin) Titan (titanboa + stiletto snake + crocodile) Tuckett (guy with sand pail head): AVAILABLE Double-Dragon (bearded dragon dragon): AVAILABLE Terrence (succulent creature): AVAILABLE Bastard (goldentail morray eel dragon): AVAILABLE

[starlightscarsyt]

DRDT UPSIDE DOWN TALENT SWAP AU!

My DRDT Upside Down Talent Swap AU! (A talent swap AU where things are upside down, with the cast having talents that pertain to their interests & hobbies! Each talent swap will have an explanation too!)

•Teruko Tawaki - Ultimate Designer •Xander Matthews - Ultimate Charity Worker •Charles Cuevas - Ultimate Florist •Ace Markey - Ultimate Competitive Racer •Arei Naegishi - Ultimate Blogger •Rose Lacroix - Ultimate Pastel Painter •Hu Jing - Ultimate Therapist •Eden Tobisa - Ultimate Baker •Levi Fontana - Ultimate Candy Maker •Arturo Giles - Ultimate Fashion Critic •Min Jeung - Ultimate Entomologist •David Chiem - Ultimate Actor •Veronika Grebenshchikova - Ultimate Skateboarder •J Rosales - Ultimate DJ •Whit Young - Ultimate Comedian •Nico Hakobyan - Ultimate Cat Groomer

===========

Why I Chose Which Talent

•Teruko - She canonically enjoys cute, girly things, and since she can't afford them, she'd design her own!

•Xander - His likes state that he enjoys volunteering. So, what better talent then having him as a charity worker who volunteers for a good cause?

•Charles - Shown to canonically enjoy succulents, and is even shown making cucumbers into flower shapes. A florist would work well for him.

•Ace - His interests aren't shown too much, so I decided that his talent would be based off how he's seemingly very competitve in CH1. It works with him still racing in some form.

•Arei - Likes gossiping, and blogs are the place where gossip is literally born!

•Rose - She's always enjoyed painting, and hey, sometimes some people need a bit of soft colors in their life to make things easier!

•Hu - While it may be for another reason, she's their to lend aid to those around her, almost like a therapist!

•Eden - Canonically likes sweet foods, and is shown to love baking in CH1!

•Levi - His likes state that he enjoys lollipops, and the Dev has said he likes food with tons of sugar! Fitting of him to become a candy maker!

•Arturo - His love for beauty combined with a judgey attitude + how the Dev said he likes expensive clothes? Right on the money for him.

•Min - Canonically enjoys collecting bugs as stated in bonus episode 1, and even draws a centipede one of the cookies in CH1!

•David - He was also difficult due to the lack of interests said in the story, so I figured actor would fit for him since I couldn't fully decide.

•Veronika - Her likes say that she loves skateboarding, and it fits that she'd still have a talent full of excitement!

•J - A tech related talent & one that sounds cool? Perfect for J.

•Whit - His love for puns & cracking jokes is befitting of a comedian!

•Nico - No matter the universe, they'd still love cats & would always take care of them!

[cloudyswritings]

Just some HK headcanons!!

Beware of spoilers

Elderbug:

This man might actually be one of the youngest characters in game? Like we know little ghost is older, and all of the knights and Quirrel are too. Like maybe only Bretta and Zote are younger? I guess also Cornifer and Iselda could be too.

He genuinely doesn’t dream, like it’s the only reason he doesn’t get infected. This is sorta based on some dialogue from when you give him that damn flower.

Hes very much a neat freak. And also has lots of childhood trauma— being born at the end of the infection will do that to you ig.

really deep sleeper honestly.

Ever since little ghost has rolled into town and befriended him he’s been feeling his age less and less(gee I wonder why that might be?)

Likes growing little succulents and other plants in his house. He cries over them when they die.

sweet lil guy.

Cornifer & Iselda:

Iselda absolutely wears the pants in the relationship, but she lets her silly little nerd husband do his things because it makes him happy.

She used to be an elite guards-bug in the kingdom she and Cornifer originate from.

She and Cornifer were childhood sweethearts. Cornifer may be busy and forgetful, but he’s never once forgotten their anniversary or her birthday.

Speaking of that Cornifer goes all out for her, and I mean like all out. He once derailed a parade so it would pass by her window(he also swapped out the banners to say happy birthday Iselda)

these two are just my favorite cute couple.

Sly:

He’s a fly(obviously)

He can’t really have kids of his own, so he views all of his pupils as his children(Matt gets this from him)

The last member of a truly ancient society of nail masters/sages.

He thought the arts would die out with him before he found his pupils

Sheo is his favorite and most impressive pupil. He’s got mixed feelings about Sheo leaving behind the nails arts for painting, but he’s still supportive and believes Sheo through painting is still improving his nail skill(oddly enough he’s right).

His whole thing about loving geo/money is just a bit he’s committed to, it’s sorta his cover to hide he’s the last nail sage.

really likes fruit juice.

[gabriel-xander]

Don't Forget

[Sans x Female!Reader]

33: I Wish It Was Easier

A/N: Gentle reminder that Mc is half Mexican-American, and half whatever ethnicity YOU want! Please enjoy the chapter!

♪────✿⁠(⁠✧◕⁠ᴗ⁠◕✧⁠)✿⁠────♪

You find it so fucking funny that the two Sans don’t like each other that much.

You expected Swap-Sans to be friendlier and more open, but that doesn’t apply to his “evil double” apparently. He’s been an absolute doll towards you at the very least, smiling wide with sparkly eyes, hanging onto every word that escapes your lips.

The inside of their home looks nearly identical to the one in your Au (YOUR Au? Is it okay for you to claim it as yours?), with some minor differences.

Actually, it looks like Swap-Sans (S-Sans) and Swap-Papyrus’ (S-Papyrus) rooms haven’t been switched (meaning Swap-Papyrus’ room is still on the left side, and Swap-Sans on the right). There’s that crazy fire show happening beneath the crack of S-Papyrus’ door. And on Swap-Sans’ door was a familiar sign that said:

“KEEP OUT OR SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE TERRIFYING TACO EXTERMINATOR!!”

How cute!

There is no sock and sticky-note war and no pet rock. However, there is a pair of dark green cargo shorts sticky-note war, and a pet succulent plant (it’s obviously plastic) covered in sprinkles.

You and the Sanses were on the couch just talking: you in the middle, S-Sans on your right, and Sans on your left. You and S-Sans are facing each other while Sans opts to sit back on the couch to silently watch and listen to the conversation. You figured that he was more focused on thinking about the current situation and how to get out of this mess you two found yourself in.

If you’re being so fucking real, you have no idea how you’re going to get out of his mess, either.

Lucky for you, you don’t have to worry about this mess for much longer because another mess walks through the front door.

You three look back behind the couch. A familiar tall, lanky, slouched skeleton walks through the door with a tired expression. He’s carrying a limp duffel bag that he drops unceremoniously to the floor, spreading chunks of snow on the poor carpet. Closing the door behind himself, only then does S-Papyrus finally look up.

Wow, this Papyrus looks so much more… You can’t even put the vibes into words. His hoodie is oversized and deep orange. It looks like there’s a wet spot on the chest that could’ve been from melted snow. His cargo shorts are deep green and stop right at his knees. His orange sneakers are missing their laces yet are somehow not falling apart.

S-Papyrus forces a smile, but he does not bother hiding his hesitation and caution as well. His eyes are bouncing constantly between you all.

Slowly, you raise your hand and wave.

Sans gently pushes your hand down.

Aight then.

“uh… hey, bro. didn’t know you had guests over,” S-Papyrus eyes stop on Sans, “who are these people? and why does that other one look like you?”

“AH, PAPYRUS! THERE YOU ARE,” S-Sans fucking vaults over the couch to this younger brother with a teasing grin, “YOU KNOW, IF YOU BOTHERED TO CHECK YOUR MESSAGES, YOU WOULD’VE SEEN THAT I ALREADY HAD INFORMED YOU VIA TEXT.”

“eh, you know i barely look at my phone.”

Nuh, God. Your Sans is terrible at texting, too.

S-Papyrus narrows his eyes at you this time, his smile dropping slightly, “so, who’s the human friend? or did you finally capture another one?”

Sans' grin falters as he scooches closer to you. S-Sans doesn’t notice the growing tension, or maybe he’s pretending it isn’t there at all. The short royal guard tugs at his brother’s sleeve to get his attention.

“BROTHER, LET ME DEBRIEF YOU SOMEWHERE ELSE. I’LL EXPLAIN IT ALL TO YOU.”

S-Sans doesn’t wait for a response, already dragging his younger brother to the kitchen to speak in private. You think he’s trying to protect you by doing that. There was no reason he had to take him to another room.

Your Sans whispers your name, getting your attention. “the fact we got caught by my double is bad enough, but i’m serious when i say this. this pap absolutely cannot know about us and how we got here.”

You nod, whispering back. “Okay, I got it.”

“i don’t like the way he’s looking at you,” Sans adds, completely unnecessary, but you weren’t complaining. “for whatever reason, i don’t want you to be alone with him, okay?”

“Awe, it’s cute you’re protective.” You grin.

His cheeks flush lightly as he rolls his eye-lights, “i’m serious, [y/n].”

“I hear you, I hear you. I don’t really wanna get separated from you when we’re in another Au anyway, so don’t worry,” You gesture vaguely to his shorts pocket, “Uh, by the way, any update on the mini-DJ?”

He frowns, reaching for the device, “no. actually, i-”

Sans immediately retracts his hand when the two skele-bros walk out of the kitchen. Desperate to make his actions look natural and not at all suspicious, his hand ended up going to your face. Brushing his bony fingers against your cheek softly, he snorts.

“you still feel cold,” Sans mutters, “you’re not gonna get human-sick again, are ya?”

You laugh at his sudden change. Your monster’s smile widens; even in these types of situations he enjoys making you laugh. It’s like a reward.

“Nah, I’m not gonna get human-sick again. Hopefully. Maybe… Probably.”

“probably?”

“It’s not like I can control these things, babycakes.”

“ha-ha! never call me that again.”

“What, you didn’t like that? How about baby doll?”

“absolutely not.”

“Baby girl?”

His cheeks flush deeper, “…no.”

“You hesitated there. I think that’s a winner.”

“gotta be honest with you, not sure how i feel about being called baby girl.”

“Would baby boy be better, then?”

“…”

“…?”

“…” Sans looks to the side, “maybe when we don’t have company.”

You flick your gaze to where he’s looking, spotting an amused S-Papyrus and a confused S-Sans right outside the kitchen. You chuckle anxiously as you lean back into the soft couch, ignoring the jingle jangle from the cushions.

You give them awkward finger guns, “‘Sup?”

You hear Sans give a tired sigh.

He wants you so bad.

S-Papyrus has a hesitant smile, hands in the pockets of his hoodie. “‘sup? nice to meet you guys. my bro tells me that he caught you in his trap.”

You nod, “Yeah, it was a good trap.”

S-Sans beams with pride, “WHILE YOU GUYS GET TO KNOW EACH OTHER, I’LL GO AHEAD AND CALL THE HUMAN NOW. I’LL BE RIGHT BACK.”

“wait, why do you have to-”

Poor S-Papyrus is ignored by his older brother. S-Sans practically dashes into his room. Silently, you three losers watch him disappear to his room. He slams the door behind you when he goes in, leaving you all in an awkward standstill. 

S-Papyrus and Sans are low-key–high-key glaring at each other. Since Sans’ smile is semi-permanent, his glare is a little more unsettling. Well, you don’t know. You’re so used to your Papyrus looking at you with Tender Love and Care™ that S-Papyrus’ obvious hostility is making your shift uncomfortably.

Wheeelp.

You smack your lips, “Well then! Sorry for our sudden intrusion. Uhm, wanna introduce yourself?”

S-Papyrus gives you the side eye, “you already know my name. my bro just said it.”

Sans decided to take that personally in your honor. “ease up, bud. she’s trying to be nice here. not like you’re going out of your way to be a good host.”

“speaking of, what are you two doing here?”

Sans holds up a hand weakly in surrender, “we’ll be gone soon enough, you don’t need to worry.”

“that’s not what i was asking.”

Oh, God. You feel embarrassed just sitting there. You don’t want to be totally useless here, but what can you even say? It’s obvious S-Papyrus knows what the fuck is going on, and that Sans knows that he knows, but these two are just making the tension worse!

“You know,” You clear your throat hesitantly, “your brother, Sans, is the one who brought us here in the first place, so you can’t exactly blame us for being here. As a matter of fact, as soon as the human child gets here and clears up that I’m a good human-” You gesture to your partner, “-Sans and I will be happy to fuck off.”

Now that you brought attention to yourself, S-Papyrus is looking at you. His eyes, somehow, gives you an obvious once-over. You really don’t think he’s checking you out though, not from how his expression is still tight with suspicion.

“so, who are you supposed to be?” “Ah-ha, uh, what are you talking about?”

“let’s not play dumb. i know about the alternate timelines and universes, too. you don’t look like the human kid that you’re supposed to be. or like the other kid that’s all homicidal.”

You can’t force back the laugh even if you want to. “Dang, that’s kinda brutal. If you knew about all that, you would know it’s not really the homicidal kids' fault… Not all of their fault, at least.”

S-Papyrus’ expression eases up at your laughter. “you can’t really blame me. that kid is such a problem, i swear they’ll be the death of me.”

Oh, nah. You think that’s supposed to be a dark joke, it’s really not funny either. But you think your brain is trying to welcome any and all distractions from how uncomfortable this situation is, that you laugh anyway.

Sans, of course, didn’t like that. Not the joke part, but the fact that S-Papyrus is making you laugh.

“anyway, pal,” Sans sits up straighter, “she’s not any of those humans if that’s what you mean. but that’s not really any of your business.”

It is so fucking funny that Sans is having beef with both S-Sans and S-Papyrus. You hope it won’t always be this way in all the Au’s, but it’s certainly more entertaining. Ah, but it could bite you guys in the ass if you’re not careful.

“Ahem!”

“did you just say ‘ahem?”

You ignore the swap skeleton’s question. “Anyway, my name is [Y/n]. It’s nice to meet you…”

He rolls his eyes (SOMEHOW??? He doesn’t have eye-lights the way Sans does, but you can just tell that was an eye-roll) but still smiles.

“papyrus,” He says, “nice to meet you too, i guess.”

You gesture to the skeleton beside you, “And this is Other Sans!”

Other Sans sulks his shoulders, “seriously?”

As if on cue, the door opens to S-Sans’ room, smile wide while he rushes down stairs.

Here comes the boyyy! Hello, boyyy! There he isss!

“SO!” S-Sans claps his hands together once he makes it to the living room, “GOOD NEWS AND EVEN MORE GOOD NEWS!”

You meet his energy with a smile, “Well, gosh! Give us the good news first!”

“RIGHTY-O! THE GOOD NEWS IS THAT THE HUMAN IS BUSY WITH UNDYNE AT THE MOMENT. THEY’RE STAYING WITH HER FOR A SLEEPOVER TO WATCH ANIME. THEY’LL BE ARRIVING TOMORROW INSTEAD.”

…Fuck.

“and that’s supposed to be the good news?” Sans winces.

“THE EVEN GOODER NEWS, IS THAT IN THE MEANTIME WHILE YOU WAIT, PAPYRUS AND I CAN TEST THE HUMAN OURSELVES!”

You blink dumbly, “Uhh, what? What do you mean? ‘Cause I’m a terrible test taker.”

Honestly, tests should be graded on how much you know, not how fast you know it!

“NO, NOT THAT KIND OF TEST. SINCE THE HUMAN IS JUST A CHILD, MAYBE THEIR JUDGEMENT WON’T BE AS ACCURATE.” Who let S-Sans cook? Get bro out of the kitchen. “TO MAKE SURE THAT YOU’RE SAFE FOR THE HUMAN, I SHOULD FIGHT YOU-”

“No.”

S-Sans blinks, taken aback, “N-NO?”

“Absolutely fucking not,” You shake your head and put your arms up in an X motion. “I’m not a fighter, okay? Let’s get that cleared up right now.”

You can’t have nice things though, what kind of life would this be if things would only go your way? Since S-Papyrus takes the role of the Judge in this Au, he’s able to read your expression perfectly just as your Sans can.

He knows you’re lying. But now Sans knows this as well. Your strength, Sans already knew about. You don’t think you’ve ever let slip that you know how to fight too. 

“you don’t gotta lie, you know. you definitely know your way around a fight or two,” S-Papyrus nudges his brother’s side, “i think she’s just scared to fight you, bro. you’re way too strong for some people.”

“Dude…” Why you? Why must you suffer? Why he gotta rat you out like that? “No, seriously. I’m not fighting you. And actually, my reluctance to fight should be proof enough of my pacifism.”

S-Sans crosses his arms and tilts his head, “W… WELL… I SUPPOSE SO… AND, I DON’T REALLY WANT TO FIGHT SOMEONE AS KIND AS YOU…”

Sans, your man in plastic wrap armor, finally joins the conversation. He leans against you while putting his elbow on your shoulder, getting in your space.

“and besides,” He starts, a tinge of something tense lacing his words, “i wouldn’t have let you. [y/n] is my human. you wanna fight a human? go get your own.”

You feel your cheeks heat up involuntarily, “Aww, that’s so romantic of you, Sans.”

“be quiet. now’s not the time.”

“Asshole.”

He sighs.

S-Papyrus sighs as well, “since you haven’t tried hurting anyone, i guess it’s fine…”

Sans snorts, “we didn’t have a chance to do anything, anyway. your brother here captured us.”

“THAT, I DID!!”

This is a lot messier than you thought it would be. Honestly, you were expecting something more wholesome and more “frolicking in a field of flowers,” than whatever the hell is happening now. Though, you guess not everything can be sunshine and rainbows. Still, it's not the worst that it could’ve been.

You smack your lips and twiddle your thumbs. “So… Wanna play cards?”

S-Papyrus shrugs, “sure.”

Nice!

────

Instead of pulling out the table that is against the wall, you all decided to just sit in a circle on the floor in front of the TV. You’re sitting closest to the kitchen, S-Papyrus is on your right (his back towards the TV), Sans is on your left (his back to the couch), and S-Sans is right across from you.

This game of Uno is possibly tearing this family further apart.

Unfortunately, S-Sans is the only one who’s bothering to hide his cards, but he has so many, you wouldn’t doubt if he has something good to fuck you all over. You’re close enough to the other two that they can see your cards and you don’t really care. You have a dumb little smile, unaware of the death glares everyone is giving each other when they think you’re not paying attention. But really, you are super aware, you’re just ignoring it because it’s weird.

S-Papyrus places down Yellow 2, so now it’s your turn. You tilt your head and look down at your hand. Hm, you got shit cards, not gonna lie.

S-Papyrus leans close to you, his shoulder lightly brushing against yours.

“You should play a Green card,” He whispers, but loud enough everyone can hear regardless.

Meh.

You shrug and place a Green 2. You should be worried that he’s blatantly looking at your hand, but he hasn’t done anything to fuck you over yet, so you guess it’s fine. That means Sans is next, and it seems S-Papyrus planned his downfall before you realized it.

Sans’ smile twitches and his eye-sockets narrow. “that’s cheating, you know.”

Ah, so he doesn’t have a green.

S-papyrus shrugs, laying an elbow on your shoulder. He leans even closer, getting all up in your space just so he can be closer to Sans.

“it’s not my fault the cards are stacked against you.” S-Papyrus grins cheekily, “‘sides, i didn’t do anything. [y/n] here is the one who played the card.”

“what, would you be too deck-pressed to lose a simple uno game ‘cause you can’t win on your own?” “keep ‘em coming, pal. i’ve got a deck of humor with these puns.”

“You guys are so eeevilll to each other.” You scrunch up your nose, “…My brother, is that honey I smell on you?”

S-Papyrus’ grin widens, “yeah, you like?” “I mean, it’s alright. Honey always smells nice, so…”

“much better than ketchup, am i right?” “OKAYYYY!!” S-Sans jumps to his feet, throwing his cards in the air with a flourish. “I THINK [Y/N] SHOULD HELP ME PREPARE LUNCH NOW!”

“Oh, Sans! You always have the best ideas!”

You toss your cards in the center, scooching back abruptly to free yourself of this prison. Doing so causes S-Papyrus to lose his balance, making him fall over to where you once were. Sans doesn’t bother hiding his mocking laugh, even pointing at the other like he’s in a comedy show.

You stand up with S-Sans help, follow him to the kitchen, and try to tune out the voices of the Sans and S-Papyrus. Are they… threatening each other with puns? Really?

“Thanks for saving me back there,” You pat him on the back, “I should’ve known Uno would’ve made it worse.”

“DON’T MENTION IT. I WAS GETTING TIRED OF DRAWING EVERY CARD ANYWAY,” S-Sans scoffs, his tone low even though he’s still talking in all upper case.

“So, what are we having for lunch?”

“ARE YOU A FAN OF TACOS?” “Fuck. Yeah, dude.”

S-Sans’ smile widens with pride. Ugh, what a good boy.

You’re not going to lie, when he said tacos, you were fully expecting white people tacos. You know, something straight out of Taco Bell. You are pleasantly surprised that it wasn’t the case at all!

Soft corn tortillas, proper beef, yellow onions, cilantro?? You know it’s all magic, but seriously, HOW?! As a half-Mexican yourself, it makes your border-hopping beaner heart happy.

You’re prepping the vegetables with S-Sans at the moment, listening in to S-Papyrus and Sans still passive-aggressively threatening each other.

You purse your lips and scooch closer to S-Sans. He looks at you with a raised bone-brow but waits for you to talk first.

“You know…” You say softly so only he would hear, “I really thought Papyrus and Other Sans would get along. You said they were similar, right? I didn’t think it’d be like this. Other Sans isn’t usually like that, I swear.” S-Sans smile drops into a grimace, “I UNDERSTAND WHAT YOU MEAN. PAPYRUS ISN’T USUALLY THAT WAY, EITHER. HE’S LAZY AND HAS TERRIBLE PUNS AND PRANKS, BUT HE’S A NICE PERSON, I PROMISE. EVEN WHEN WE FIRST MET THAT HUMAN CHILD, HE WAS EFFORTLESSLY KIND.”

You don’t doubt that for a second.

Even though Reset after Reset, Sans (and S-Papyrus) always maintained his friendly persona for the most part. No, it’s not even a persona. Sans is, at his core, a nice person. He has his edgy moments for sure, but it’s not all he is. It’s not a big part of who he is at all.

Sans is tense about being caught by Swap-Sans and Swap-Papyrus so quickly, but is that really enough for him to be so hostile like that?

“BUT…” S-Sans continues after a moment of silence, “IF I HAD TO GUESS, I THINK IT MUST BE BECAUSE MY LITTLE BROTHER HAS BEEN ON EDGE LATELY.”

You furrow your eyebrows together, “Oh? Do you mind if I–Ah. I mean, is it something I can ask about?” Swap-Sans furrows his brows as well, hesitating to answer. He understands it’s not really his business to share, especially to someone his brother clearly doesn’t fully trust. In the end, it looks like Swap-Sans really needed–wanted–to talk to someone about it.

“WELL… MY BROTHER HAS A VARIETY OF JOBS ACROSS THE UNDERGROUND. FROM SELLING CORN-DOGS, DOING STAND-UP AT NTT RESORT, AND EVEN GUARD DUTY.” “Guard duty? Isn’t that your thing, though?”

“NOT LIKE THAT. HE HAS VARIOUS SENTRY STATIONS AROUND THE UNDERGROUND. SOMETIMES INSTEAD OF SELLING CORNDOGS, HE’LL BE ON THE LOOKOUT IF ASKED.” Ah, okay. So similar to your Sans, then. You just wanted to make sure.

“A FEW WEEKS AGO, PAPYRUS MENTIONED SOMETHING BEFORE. SOMETHING IN DOWNTOWN SNOWDIN.” S-Sans tilts his head, trying to remember the best he can. “HE SAID IT’S BEEN MAKING THE MAGIC GO HAYWIRE IN MONSTERS WHO STAY THERE FOR EVEN A SHORT AMOUNT OF TIME. IT SEEMS TO BE AFFECTING THEIR MOOD, AS WELL. SINCE PAPYRUS WORKS THERE, HE MUST ALSO BE GETTING AFFECTED BY SUCH A THING.”

Something that showed up suddenly a few weeks ago, huh? Could it be possible that it showed up around the same time the DJ started to work? If that’s the case, it’s your best clue. If your theory is right, then this is something you should be looking out for in future Au’s that you visit.

Best not to dwell on it too much though, you could be completely wrong.

“Have you checked it out yourself yet? I know I barely know you, but even I can tell you’re a capable Royal Guard.”

S-Sans frowns, sulking his shoulders, “ALPHYS SAID I’M FORBIDDEN TO GO THERE AT ALL. SHE SAID SHE DIDN’T WANT ME TO GET HURT, AND THAT SHE WOULD SEND SOMEONE WHO IS QUALIFIED. PERHAPS SHE’S CONSIDERING TO ASK DR. UNDYNE.” You widen your eyes, “Wait, back up. She said you’re forbidden? Can she do that??”

“ALPHYS IS THE CAPTAIN OF THE ROYAL GUARD, AND… UGH. OFFICIALLY, I AM NOT A MEMBER.” “Should I bother with my rebellious speech how that means she’s technically not even your boss so you don’t really have to listen to her?” S-Sans simply shakes his head, but he can’t fight back that amused smile or that twinkle in his eyes.

“Duly noted. I’ll skip that and get right into informing you that…” You dramatically look around, leaning towards him to whisper, “I’m 100% human!”

“YES…? I KNOW?”

“Sans, if I’m human, maybe I won’t be affected by whatever this thingy is!” You explain with a smile, “Other Sans and I could investigate and figure out what that thing is. Other Sans told you we were on a mission, remember? Well, that mission is to get back home and maybe, I don’t know, it could be our first clue.”

If S-Sans thinks about it too much, he will easily see how that DOESN’T make any sense or have any relevance to your predicament. Lucky for you, he doesn’t think about that at all. It doesn’t absolve him from any current hesitation though.

“UH… I DON’T KNOW…” You smile softly and pat his shoulder, “How about after the human kid clears my name, we can talk about it then, yeah?”

He looks at you appreciatively, nodding eagerly with lifting spirits.

You two get back to making tacos in a better mood, relishing in the silence as the boys in the living room have exhausted themselves. You figured it was only a matter of time, yappers tend to wear themselves out if you just leave them to it.

So, that’s it then. Maybe that’s why S-Papyrus was weary of you two on the get-go. To be fair, you think his untrustful nature towards you two is warranted considering: A. You are an adult human, and B: Sans is a duplicate of his innocent brother. If the roles were reversed, you don’t think you’d be as friendly either.

God, you don’t know if Sans would be as accommodating. After all, he tricked your close ones to get you to live with him just because he didn’t trust you one bit. It’s not unreasonable that S-Papyrus is acting this way, you suppose. But “terrorizing” Sans the way he was doing earlier? Is that something that is acceptable?

Or maybe S-Papyrus just thinks you and Sans are the cause for the weird phenomena happening in downtown Snowdin. After all, that thing (Whatever it is, is it even a tangible object?) shows up, fucks with the monster’s inner magic and even their emotions. Then conveniently, you and Sans pop up without warning?

…Yeah, okay. Fine.

Finally, you and S-Sans finish the tacos! You and S-Sans help with pulling out the table from the side of the wall (because of course you two are the ones doing the labor) while you two made S-Papyrus and Sans set the table.

…The food was okay. You genuinely think it would’ve been worse if you weren’t there to help. You were closely watching how S-Sans was cooking and prepping and you NEEDED to intervene.

Ain’t nobody in this damn house know how to cook other than you.

Taglist:

@lemonboy011

@adriixboo

@fetusbaconegg

@fluffyart5000

[escondidolibrary]

Love Succulents? Bring clippings of your favorite succulents to pot, trade, and share with fellow plant lovers on Saturday, July 1, 2:00 to 4:00 p.m. in front of the Library!

Small containers of dirt will be provided while supplies last. Participating in this free event counts as a point for the Adult Summer Reading Challenge! https://library.escondido.org/summer.aspx Sponsored by the Friends of the Escondido Public Library. #succulentswap #succulents #freeplants #escolibrary #escondidoca 

[leohtttbriar]

the snow-melted and it's sunny and it's spring and that makes me feel some type of way so here's a kiradax springtime fic featuring the fascinations of a nature-walk and jadzia dax as a sort of ms. frizzle:

On a bright day like this, Kira was happy to be handing out juice boxes.

Sure, she would’ve preferred to have been part of Keiko’s field-trip party, with the older students on a rock-climbing mission to observe cliff-side fungus. But Keiko had been a little too bright-faced and excited as she tucked her climbing shoes into her backpack and gathered all the older kids together for a lesson in knot-tying and rappelling, and, almost immediately, Miles had begged Kira to swap chaperone positions so he could trail after his wife pretending to be worried about the cliffs on which she was leading an educational expedition but really interested in just documenting ‘the moment,’ as he called it.

“When Molly starts to be embarrassed of us,” he said, turning on his camera and smirking as Keiko demonstrated a very long finger-hold on a nearby boulder, the strained muscles in her forearms and shoulders not even appearing to shake. “I want evidence that we’re actually cool.”

“Well, one of you is,” said Kira. “You mostly play games with Julian in your free-time.”

Miles shot her a dirty look but then Keiko was calling her group to start on the hike and he was scampering after her.

So Kira was left with the younger kids on a much less dangerous nature walk that didn’t involve rock-climbing. But she was happy about it. The day was bright, crisp air with warm sun, and she didn’t have to do much more than make sure the little ones stayed on the path and hand out juice boxes. And, really, they were all too mesmerized by Jadzia to misbehave or wonder off.

Kira couldn’t exactly blame them, though. Jadzia had turned up in a shirt covered in colorful scientific illustrations of various Bajoran insects, a giant hair clip that looked like one of the stone-caterpillars that Kira used to make into a stew in her hungriest moments during the war, and a box of tiny, kid-sized binoculars which she handed to each student with all the sincerity and solemnity of a general handing out medals of honor to soldiers. She oo’d an ah’d over every little thing and all the kids were following after her like she was personally responsible for putting a flower in their path to look at.

“Oh, look at that!” gasped Jadzia, pointing up at what looked to be a normal tree limb with such drama that every single kid was gasping with her despite, Kira assumed, not knowing what it is they were gasping at. They gathered around Jadzia, following to where her finger pointed, their little mouths open in awe.

“What?” asked one of the more impatient kids. “I don’t see anything.”

“It’s an aerial succulent,” said Jadzia, bending down. “See, between the stalks, there's a film which will expand and catch on a breeze if the plant needs to move.”

“Like wings?” asked another kid, taking rigorous notes in her notebook (Kira was able to read she had just added plant flying color green pretty in uneven block letters).

“Yes! Exactly like wings!” said Jadzia, as if this comparison had just occurred to her.

“Wow.”

Jadzia had them all draw a picture of the succulent, a star shaped thing with a sparkly veil between each point, tipping this way and that on the tree branch but yet holding steady. Kira attempted a drawing herself, as Jadzia had made sure to provide her with a “field notebook” and binoculars, along with the kids. It was not a good drawing, but Kira liked it. After, they continued shuffling along the path and Kira helped a couple kids not to trip on their feet as they traversed forward, binoculars glued to their eyes.

When Keiko had suggested a field trip, Kira had not expected to be asked to help. But it seemed Sisko was of the opinion that she needed “a break,” or something like that. And so he had volunteered much of his chief staff to help out with the trip to Bajor and even extending the offer of the supervised field trip to some of the schools that would be nearby their educational expedition. As the morning progressed, Kira couldn’t help but be thankful for it. There were worse ways to spend a day. And Jadzia had been very happy when Kira had turned up, which always made Kira feel warm in more ways than one. She might've switched assignments, anyway, if Miles hadn't asked.

Eventually they ended up by a stream and Jadzia instructed everyone to be on the lookout for fossils.

“I know there are fossils,” she whispered triumphantly to Kira, once the kids were darting back and forth on the bank like the intrepid explorers they were. “I scouted the trail—this watershed area is almost nothing but limestone.”

Kira bent down to examine the earth herself, picking up an angular yet smooth-cornered rock and rolling it around in her palm.

“Limestone has more fossils in it?” she asked.

Jadzia plopped down next to her. “Yep,” she said. She reached over and gently guided Kira’s fingers to hold the rock so the angle was pointed up. Then she poured a splash of water on it, smoothed away some dirt, and pointed to an imprint in the stone. “See?” she said. “A shell.”

“Oh,” said Kira, looking closer at the strangely patterned whirl. It looked like the aerial succulent.

“Limestone is a graveyard, for organic life,” said Jadzia, halfway to soft but still cheerful. “It’s got a bit of a sacred history on Trill, but I never bought into all those sad poems. Trills only seem to know how to write sad poems��—she rolled her eyes, and Kira bit the inside of her cheek to contain her grin—“and I just don’t think fossils are things to be sad about anyway. True, this”—she indicated the rock in Kira’s hand by cupping Kira’s knuckles and pushing gently against them, causing Kira to, embarrassingly, blush—“is made of the compressed bodies of ancient marine life, but it’s not as if they’re gone. There they are.”

Kira turned her gaze away from Jadzia’s open face and back to the dirty rock in her palm. She didn’t like to think of it as a graveyard. Death was a strange, conceptual thing for Bajorans—as all things are and have been and will be all at once, so eternal ending is just one edge of infinite reality, which has many edges stretching on and on.

“It’s just evidence that they were,” she found herself saying. “But they also are. Just—are.”

Jadzia tipped her head, her eyebrows pinched together. “This might be one of those temporal perspectives I don’t get,” she said.

Kira smiled. “I mean,” she said. “In some way, this…shell?”

“Crinoid.”

“This crinoid,” said Kira, still biting back a grin. “Is swimming around now. In the sea.”

Jadzia looked at her, eyes sparkling. “Okay,” she said. “Then limestone isn’t a graveyard at all.” She picked the rock up out of Kira’s hand and placed back on the ground but replaced its weight with her own palm. “Everything just adds and adds, in every direction.”

Kira’s smile couldn’t be stopped. She curled her fingers around Jadzia’s wrist. “Yes,” she said, leaning in close, tracing the line of sun lighting up the dark hollows on Jadzia’s face and the soft hairs on her jaw.

Jadzia tilted her chin down, their noses now millimeters apart. The sound of the stream and the sound of her breath on Kira’s mouth washed over her. “Nerys—” she said, voice sweet.

Then, “Da-ax!”

They leaned away from each other quickly.

“Yeah?” called back Jadzia, wiping her twitchy hands on her shorts.

“I fell in!” said one of the kids while all the others laughed.

Kira snorted. Jadzia pressed her palm against Kira’s once more before launching to her feet.

“Duty calls,” she said, dramatically. “Remember me fondly.”

She walked off, already lecturing all the kids about the joys of an impromptu swim and the subsequent chance to dry off in the sun, and soon Kira was being bombarded by tired students in search of snacks.

She slipped the rock in her backpack, when no one was looking. An eternal touch of a swimming creature and the warmth of Jadzia's hand--everything just added on. It was a bright day.

[saucyjothoughts]

You take Bojan home with your boyfriend and you absolutely wreck him together

Now here's a concept we can all get behind.

(nsfw under the cut)

He's straight, he says. Of course he thinks about threesomes, what guy doesn't? But only with two girls. There's nothing wrong with it, he's just never felt the need to explore that kind of thing, he says.

But obviously he has to say that. And even if it were true, it wouldn't be the first time you and your boyfriend have brought a 'straight' man into your bed.

Anyway, he started it. He was flirting with you first. You just... didn't let him stop after he found out you were already with someone. You let the idea sit with him over the course of the night, dancing and joking with him, buying him drinks, letting your touch linger. Kissing him. Hoping he'd kiss back.

He did.

And now you're saying your goodbyes to your friends and you're fuzzy with alcohol as you step into the sharp air of the night and watching Bojan place a cautious hand on your boyfriend's thigh in the taxi home. You're showing him the couch, the bathroom, the bedroom... does he want some hot tea or a glass of wine? Or maybe he just wants you - both of you?

In the bedroom, you want to make things as easy as possible. You let him undress you a little, caress your legs, knead at your breasts while your boyfriend is right there, talking him through it.

When it's time to swap, he's a little more hesitant. But you promise complete discretion and his body gives away his arousal when he lets your boyfriend take off his shirt to kiss at his neck.

After that, your memory is jumbled as the heat of the evening goes to your head and time passes in a blur of wet lips and scratching nails and laughter and dirty words and the taste of salt.

Your boyfriend is behind him, holding his arms back because he isn't allowed to touch you while you're dragging your tongue up the underside of his red, leaking cock. Your hand under his balls, one wet finger circling the sensitive skin of his asshole while your boyfriend supports him against his chest. You kiss at the tip before taking him into your mouth and Bojan is desperate to kiss something, twisting to find your boyfriend's lips.

On all fours, his knees sinking into your mattress, Bojan's face is between your legs, lapping eagerly at your wet cunt. Your body is still so relaxed and sensitive from the intoxication of your evening and he sounds wonderful, all wetly sucking lips and pathetic moans. His hair is soft as you stroke it when he's doing well, pushing his face down and bucking your hips up into him when you want more pressure.

A blur.

But he's not able to give you his full attention, despite his best efforts. Because, behind him, your boyfriend is gripping hard into his hips, eating out the virgin little hole he's only ever pleasured with his own hand. You can see Bojan's cock hanging hard between those succulent thighs as your boyfriend is warming up lube in his hands. Bojan screams into your pussy as your boyfriend starts to finger him. "Pay attention to your job," he tells him, and Bojan obeys, his tongue clumsy and distracted against your clit. You know he's being gentle and patient - your boyfriend is a good man - but the feeling is intense, overwhelming, and Bojan's whole body is trembling in anticipation of what's to come. Your boyfriend's pleasured moans fill the room as he finally takes Bojan's hole with his cock, hot and tight. In no time at all, he's fucking him hard, the meat of Bojan's plump ass blushing red as your boyfriend thrusts into him again and again.

Only after he comes inside and sucks it all back out...

Your pussy is liquid-soft from the attention from Bojan's tongue and ready to be filled. Your guest is well endowed - you know he'll fill you well - his skin glistening with sweat and desperate to feed his cock some relief, to get inside something.

A blur.

Your boyfriend finally gives him permission to fuck you and he dives into your waiting pussy. He's gruff on top of you, grunting animalistically, heavy and masculine and forcing his cock into you as deep as he can, urgently fighting for his release. He's begging to be allowed to pump his come into you but your boyfriend instructs him to wait. He's not allowed to finish until you do. Luckily, the angle lets the rough plump of skin above his cock slap against your clit and it's not long before your orgasm creeps up on you, curling your toes. Your boyfriend kisses you through it, Bojan collapsed against your neck as he's fucking you, his cock sending shockwaves of pleasure through your body and making you cry and curse enough to push him over the edge, finally allowed to come, to spill into you, sweaty and intense.

He's still twitching and your boyfriends palm slapping against his ass makes him thrust into you again, both of you sensitive and flooded with pleasure, Bojan panting, drained dry and violated in ways he's only ever fantasised about.

[justforbooks]

Swap your traditional roast lamb for Greek slow-cooked lamb kleftiko. Roasted for over 2 hours with garlic, tomatoes, peppers and potatoes, the lamb is succulent and falls from the bone. Enjoy leftovers the next day in warm flatbread.

Daily inspiration. Discover more photos at Just for Books…?

[dicenne]

Dicenne's 'All I Want for Winter Veil' Succulent Tart show 2024

Greatfather Winter steps out onto the stage with black electric guitar in hand, dragging a microphone stand with him towards the center. With his festive hat now gone, those long white locks flow freely past his shoulders and seem to almost shimmer beneath the bright spotlight as if laced with tinsel. His red coat is even more undone now, allowing a better glimpse of the brawny chest beneath and the red runic tattoo that covers his right side, sneaking up over the edge of his jaw. Greatfather Winter is 100% a silver fox, for sure.

"Probably didn’t expect a guitar, huh?

I’ve been taking vocal and guitar lessons for a couple decades now with the beautifully talented Gabbrialla, the Ringleader before me for the Tarts. 

I’ve done a few songs here and there for shows on occasion, but it’s been a while since my focus tends to be on dance.

However, I want to stretch my vocals tonight and try something a little different for me. …Okay, very different for me. And feel free to get up and dance too if you’re so moved to do so!"

He clears his throat and looks down at the effects unit by his feet, stepping on a pedal before he begins to strum a languorous, bluesy riff. Leaning close to the mic, he sings in a deep, beautifully crisp and smooth bass voice, reminiscent of a crooner. “You’re a mean one, Mr. Greench. You really are a heel.” Lips curl into devilish grin as bright eyes flicker about the crowd, “You’re as cuddly as a cactus, and as charming as an eel, Mr. Greeeeeench.” 

He strums the guitar a bit faster, halting for just a moment while speak-singing, “You’re a bad banana with a..” Hips suddenly thrust outwards at the drum hit as he pushes another pedal with his foot, resuming his singing - now in a higher octave, “Greasy black peeeeeeeeel.” With a flamboyant roll of that ‘R’, he then extends the held note with a touch of vibrato before letting it slide off and continuing to strum the groovy refrain. The man clearly has got a magnificent, well-honed voice! 

He now sings in the higher octave, adding vocal fry to his tone to give that edgier rock vibe, “Just face the music you’re a monster, Mr. Greench.” He switches back to the lower octave, finding his groove so he can really start showing off those vocal abilities he’s been working on, “Your heart’s an empty hole. Your brain is full of spiders, you’ve got garlic in your soul, Mr. Greeeeench.”

He stops strumming, swapping once more into the higher register with ease, “I wouldn’t touch you with a, thiry-nine-and-a-half foot pooooooooole.” Even in the higher range, he holds that note longer in a melodic fry scream. His rich voice completely fills the space, and even though he’s just singing and playing in one place, it's nearly impossible to shift attention elsewhere; this man commands the stage. The musical riff resumes and his hips begin to sway and roll with the driving beat while he continues to play. 

He is obviously enjoying himself now as he settles into the almost jazzy rhythm, darting his tongue out to flirtatiously trail along the edges of his teeth:  “You’re a vile one, Mr. Greench. You’ve got termites in your smile. You have all the tender sweetness”, Once more he flips up the octave into that raw but controlled melodious wail. “..of a seasick crocodile, Mr. Greeeeench!” He’s got the range, the breath control, and then some. Who knew?

He halts his playing, speak-singing once more in a haughty tone, “Well given the choice between the two of you, I would take the..” Another hip thrust accompanies the drum hit and he continues that disciplined fry scream, “SEASICK CROCODIIIIIIIIIIIILE…Yeahh..” He steps away from the mic to take a deep breath after that one, almost chuckling. He’s clearly enjoying himself, and this is likely a surprise to the vast majority since he’s never claimed singing as his forte!

The musical refrain trails off and he hits another pedal on the effects box, the guitar now sounding more like a bass when he begins the sultry sequence of notes, pulling the mood back down. With another step on a different pedal, the guitar comes in and he leans to the microphone, back in his original, lower octave, sounding somewhat sinister. “You’re a foul one, Mr. Greench. You’re a nasty-wasty skunk. Your heart is full of unwashed socks, and your soul is full of gunk, Mr. Greench.” He almost snarls the name, strumming quicker.

He flings his hand out on the last guitar chord and grips the microphone to yank in closer to his mouth, speak-singing with a swagger in his voice, “The three best words I would use to describe you are as follows, and I quote:” He clears his throat, leaning back. It’s about to get loud in here again! Flips up into his higher register, punctuating each word with a strike on his guitar, “STINK! STANK! STUUUUUUUUNK-YEAH!” Hips gyrate suggestively against his instrument, “OHHH YEAH, Yeahhh…”

He steps away from the microphone stand, looking down to his guitar as he begins masterfully gliding through a guitar solo. Lush, white hair falls down around his face before he whips his head back, and he gracefully flies through the power chords, improvising a bit of transition and tremolo strumming throughout. Dicenne is absolutely owning this Greatfather Winter look, sending more of that white mane flying forwards and back with his movements to get his entire body into the moment. The aggressive motions just happen to help pop open those last couple buttons of his red coat to display the rippling musculature of his torso beneath. Who knew Greatfather Winter could be dripping with sex appeal?

He steps back up to the microphone and picks the melody of the song on his guitar before leaning closer to sing using that glottal fry again and adding in a slide to the top note, “Mr. Greeeeeench.” It’s impressive how easy he makes it sound, while also not blowing out his vocal chords! “STIIIIIINK, STAAAAAANK, STUUUUUUUUNK-YEAH!” The final note is punctuated with a more growled intonation, stepping away from the mic to inhale, then exhale slowly as the playful smirk creeps back across his lips.

@succulent-tart